My sister-in-law threw a PARTY got my son with strangers…without notifying me! -r/BORUpdates | Reddit Stories | EP2671

Heyo, it's Riley here. And this is Carly, your favorite OK Storytime host. And we've got some great stories coming up. Before we get into these wild stories, we have a quick two-minute break from the sponsors that keep the show going. This is an I Heart podcast. Guaranteed human. No gloss, no filter, just stories, spoken without fear. A person who is not generous cannot be an artist. The world will be at peace only when it is ruled by poet-syn philosophers. Listen to my weekly podcast, the Pooja Bha Chow on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Come for the honesty. Stay for the fire. My sister-in-law threw a party for my son with strangers without notifying me. Who's at the party? So on Saturday, we celebrated my son's birthday, and my husband and I had a party for him with all of his friends and our families. It was a blast, and everything turned out perfect. By the way, this comes from OKCookie7515. And if you want to submit your own stories, go to the heart slash OKStorytime subreddit. I'm Sophia. I'm Carly. And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we don't have all the answers. We only know what we do. So let us know what you would do in the comments. And OP says, two weeks ago, my mother-in-law asked if she could borrow my son the day after his birthday to take him to his favorite indoor playground. She texted me today and asked if she could also borrow my daughter, who is eight months old, so I could stay behind and clean up the mess from the party. I thought, wow, yes, that would be helpful, right? He sounds lovely so far. Sounds great. Well, little did I know she took them to the indoor playground because my sister-in-law had planned a party for my son and invited all her friends and their kids whom I don't even know or have ever met. That's weird. Why would you invite OP? Right, like, I get the kind gesture. I'm happy that she added and their kids. Yeah, yeah, that'd be so weird. She's like, yes, all my adults have come to Google at my nephew. From the title, I was totally picturing that. We're going to put him in a glass case, and everyone's just got to, he's literally in one of those netted climbing gyms, and they all have binoculars. Like, as you can see here, the young human boy. He's very agile. He's rampant. Climbing quick. My son only knew one kid of the bunch that went. I probably only personally met two out of the 15 people who attended. I am so devastated that my mother-in-law was not honest with my husband and me from the start. My husband and I are not on speaking terms with my sister-in-law, but even then, my mother-in-law made us invite her to the party we threw for my son and threatened to stop helping with the kids if we didn't. That's insane, even though she hardly ever helps. To keep the peace with my mother-in-law, we decided to invite my sister-in-law, and she did come to my son's birthday party. Now, I am so disappointed and disgusted that they would throw my son a birthday party with a bunch of strangers he didn't know. Not only that, but I trusted them with my baby. And now I'm seeing pictures of strangers holding my baby girl. Oh, no. Oh, no. Mm-mm. Oh. Mm-mm. Oh, now it's no contact with mother-in-law and sister-in-law. It's like you're bomber. Go south. It makes me feel like a horrible mother knowing I didn't have control over their safety with other strangers. Am I the a-hole for thinking I should have been notified, invited, and even asked if it was okay to throw him a party? If they know you're not the a-hole? You're not the a-hole. That's wild. We have also been planning a surprise party for my mother-in-law next week with a DJ and a live band, which I am now tempted to cancel. My husband is talking to his mom tomorrow, and I am losing sleep. Feeling like the worst mom ever, and there are some comments, but what do you think? Ooh, okay. Well, first off, not the a-hole. We established that. No. Especially once you hit, like, there's pictures of random strangers holding my eight-month-old. Mm-mm. As far as the party for mother-in-law, though, I feel like in some way you probably can't get money back for that. I'm not canceling it. I'm not canceling it. I'm not going, and neither am I to kids. My husband can go. See, from what it sounds like to me, it sounds like they're throwing a surprise party. So it sounds like OP and her husband are planning it. Or you just, I got you. We're not inviting mother-in-law. Now it's just to have a less party. A cool but party. Yeah. That works too. Mm-hmm. Comment one says, how are you the worst mom? Mother-in-law, hijack your kids. You do need to work on that spine. Keeping peace with mother-in-law just means letting her have her way all the time. I'd definitely cancel the party for the old sneak. And low contact and no contact going forward. OP says, yes, I'm done being nice. I'm usually a pushover, but not when it comes to my kids. They blindsided me, and now I'm seeing my sister-in-law's social media and I literally ran to the bathroom and almost threw up thinking about my babies being held and celebrated by people that I've never met. Reply says, comment under every single picture that you did not approve of any of those people touching your children. Make an issue of it. So strange. Report the pictures your sister-in-law posted and have them taken down. Don't just let her or anyone post pictures of your kids. Comment two says, not the A-hole. Your husband needs to strongly back you up. I hope your kids didn't catch anything from those strangers. Cancel the party for your lying mother-in-law. Don't cancel. It's a surprise party. You have a DJ and a live band. Party up. It's next week. Don't cancel. Invite all your friends. Literally, it's gonna be so much fun. Honestly, if anyone texted me last minute, surprise DJ party, I'm there. I'd be like, oh my God, guys. We're having a surprise. We're having a non-surprise surprise party. It's a surprise for all of you guys now. You guys didn't know what was happening. Live band DJ, come over. I mean, the guests all know about it still, presumably. And you're like, hey, mother-in-law can no longer make it. So it's just gonna be a party. OP, this finally made my husband realize the double standards my mother-in-law has for him and his sister. She would have never allowed us to do something like that to her. Sister-in-law doesn't have kids, but so wrong to have helped conceal the truth from us. Commentary says, I would be outraged. I would feel physically ill too. Your job as a parent is to keep your kids safe and you can't keep your kids safe if you don't know who they're with. They lie to you. You are not overreacting and you are not the a-hole. Please, never, ever, ever let your kids be alone with your mother-in-law or sister-in-law ever again. Terrifying awful people. They should be so ashamed of themselves. OP says, yeah, mother-in-law is super ashamed, cried and understands why we're setting more boundaries and low contact with her. Oh, okay. Whoa, I was not expecting her to be remorseful at all. I did think there was gonna be some level of the manipulation came from sister-in-law still, but for her to so easily not just brush it away. Say no, yeah. Actually like being upset. Sister-in-law absolutely lost her rights to have a relationship with our kids. Commentary says, wow, simply wow. I can't believe you're tempted to cancel your mother-in-law's party. You should be scorching the earth and cutting mother-in-law and sister-in-law permanently on everything and shouting from the rooftops that they'll never, ever see your children again. You need to tell your husband that you and your children are no longer a part of his family and if he's not on board, he can leave and you'll be filing for a divorce. Okay, we haven't got any indication that husband is not on board with this. Husband was gonna talk to mother-in-law. Husband seems to be pretty active as a parent and good partner. I don't think we need to even think about divorce right now. That's crazy. There's no compromise on this. If you have to get a lawyer, get one that's a shark that will get you everything you and your kids deserve. Commenter, calm down. I'm still blown away with what his family did. Are you sure your husband didn't know? Geez. Okay, how would your opinion change if it came out that husband did know? Ooh, pretty bad. Pretty bad. Would you go to divorce? No. Okay, yeah, I wouldn't either. Because that, you know, honestly, I'd be like, wow, you lied to me, that's totally inappropriate. But then I'd be like, okay, on the other hand, still really mad at you, but also at least, you know, someone was aware of where our kids were. And now you're willing to fix it at least. Regardless, you need to stand up to his vile mother and sister and tell them that because of their behavior, they will never ever see your children again. Don't just think about it, do it. If you do nothing, then expect your in-laws to lie to you always and have future parties with your children without you or your husband. I mean, I'm glad mother-in-law seems to have some remorse. I still think low contact for now at least, she like needs to work that trust back up. Absolutely. I'm not saying mother-in-law can't ever like, get back to that trusting level, but sister-in-law is not. It's gonna take a while. Yeah. Yeah, and she's not getting my kids unsupervised like that. I'm not finding out through my kids popping up on my social media without me. To me, it seems like the kids came home, or the son came home was like, yeah, we had a surprise party. Oh, I'm sure that, you know, cause he's at the age where he's just gonna be like, and we did this and this and then there's the members. And then I would win came over and I didn't know any of them. And there's a lot of weird people there, mom. Yeah, and they kept taking pictures of me. Really weird. I smiled for them all though, I was like, don't worry. Don't worry, mom, I looked, go wait. You'll see them soon. Update, mother-in-law apologized to us and validated our feelings. The surprise party was canceled. We are going absolutely no contact with sister-in-law and keeping limited contact with mother-in-law. A bit of context. My son is on the spectrum. He's super smart and bright, but still struggles with full communication. I am very cautious about who we allow in our lives because of this. Sister-in-law is blaming her mom for not communicating to us that it was a birthday party. She is no longer allowed to have a relationship with our kids. As for the Instagram photos, she posted of the party they have now expired. Obviously my son was happy, he got presents and cake. And I do love when people love on my kids. I wrote this post at 3 a.m. to vent and see if I'm the a-hole for thinking I should have been invited or notified. And that's the end of the story. I criticized my wife's DIY haircut and she had a meltdown on me. You're supposed to say, no, honey, I love your bangs. My wife, 25 female, decided to follow what she says is a TikTok trend. I'm not on TikTok, so I don't really know what it is. Instead of going to a salon, she cut her own hair. Her hair used to go down to her back and now it's really short. By the way, this comes from Chemical Vanilla 201. And if you want us to make your own stories, go to the r slash okay story time subreddit. I'm Carly. I'm Sophia. And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we don't have all the answers. We only know what we would do. Sometimes I don't even know that. So just know what you would do in the comments. And Opie says, she asked me what I thought. I said, wow, why didn't you just go to a salon? Why would you say that? She said she likes it this way because it feels liberating. She asked again how I liked it. And I said it looks uneven. And like her five year old niece was left alone with scissors. Opie, you're the A-hole. We didn't need to add that second part. You're the A-hole. You're the A-hole. She got really upset and said that I was being controlling. Well, I don't think you're being bad. I don't think you're being controlling. I think you're being an A-hole. And that I was just making excuses because men stereotypically like women with long hair. I told her the issue isn't the length. It's that the haircut itself looks bad, especially in the back. I also said, oh no, since my company's Christmas dinner is tomorrow, could she please go to a salon and fix it? You're the A-hole. She started crying and called me a jerk. Now she says she isn't coming to the dinner at all. I honestly don't know what to do. She was trying to give herself a pixie cut like Anne Hathaway or Michelle Williams, but instead gave herself a dumb and dumber, Lloyd Christmas haircut. Am I the A-hole? Yes. Comments, comment one. You're not out of line for saying it looks bad or that she should fix it. I think a reasonable person would want to know what people honestly think, especially before they go to a major public event. You are out of line for saying it looks like a five year old cut it. That's just being unnecessarily cruel. I agree with that commenter. Comment two, pro tip. If you want people to listen to your criticism, maybe try to not insult them while you give it. Yeah. I don't know why you had to insult her and say that about the five year old being left alone with scissors. I don't know why you would say something insulting and then be insulted and surprised that she's upset and doesn't want to go to the dinner or fix it. Yeah, because sometimes you get like, I mean, I do this where sometimes my parents will say something about an outfit and then I'm just like shut down. I'm like, well, no, I can't go out. I don't even want to go now. I got it done. And like there's probably an incredibly easy fix. But if I'm already in that mood, it's like such a hard to go. There's such a far line and I think it is so mood dependent because sometimes I do want honest feedback about an outfit. Absolutely. But then other times I just want you to be like, you look great, let's go. Yeah, I feel like if I come up to you and say like, does this look weird? You could be like, yeah, that doesn't really go together. If I come up to you and say, do I look good? Yes, yes, yes you do. And you can give little critiques. You can give it like, oh, I think with different shoes. I think maybe that your hair should be up or down. That's it. Oh wow, that's new. I'm glad you like it. How about you go to the salon to have them touch up the back since that's hard to do on your own. Other than that, if you like the length, then that's great. Would not have unalived you. You're the A-hole. Not for not liking her haircut, but for being mean and foolish with how you brought up her fixing it. This is your wife. Would you have wanted her to mock you for trying something and saying, like you let a five year old do it? Probably not. And we have an update. Oh boy. And the update is, since I don't have the energy to reply to DMs. Let's see if she actually went to this dinner. I think if OP actually listens to these comments. Yes. He could go to his wife and say, I'm so sorry for how I said that. I love the length. I just think it's a little uneven. And like, you know, I'd love to pay for you to go, like us to go to the salon together and we can make the little day out of it. Yeah. My worry, this is the day before the dinner. That's true. Is she going to be able to? Update. I apologize to my wife. Ooh. I told her I was being a mean knucklehead and that my comments were uncalled for. I told her that whether she wanted to go to a salon or was happy with her hair as it is, it was totally fine by me. The only thing I really wanted was for her to come with me to my work Christmas party. She forgave me, but said she wasn't going to a salon because she likes her hair. I accepted that and we went to the party. She knows most of my coworkers' wives, so she went to say hi to them while I talked with the guy from work. After a while, she came up to me and asked if we could leave early. Where all the girls like, Oh, no, your hair. Oh, I hope they weren't mean girl. She looked upset. I said, I wish we could, but we had to stay until my boss gave his speech. Leaving right then would have looked really bad unless it was an emergency. She said, no problem. In the middle of my boss's speech, one of my coworkers' wives, who's also her friend, quietly came up to me and whispered that my wife was in the bathroom, crying and having a meltdown. I had to sneak out. It turned out she felt really insecure about her haircut because two of the coworkers' wives had told her politely, but still, that it looked terrible. Why? Why? Tell her later. I don't know. One of them even offered to book her an appointment with a stylist to fix it before Christmas. I need to see how bad this haircut is. It's gotta have been pretty bad. I talked to her out of the bathroom and told my boss, my wife, had an emergency and that we needed to leave. Luckily, he understood. She cried and screamed the whole way home, saying people are mean and had made fun of her and commented on her hair. I told her not to take it seriously, that they were probably wasted and just saying random stuff. Plus, who cares what a bunch of random strangers say? Also, she's always had long hair, so of course she looks different now, which is probably why they commented. I told her not to worry about what they think. Aw. This is tough. I think she'll realize in a couple of days. Just really unfortunate timing. Yeah, I think she's been a little stubborn. Yeah. Just in terms of herself, she's like, no, I like this hair. I like it. She's trying to convince herself. I think give her a couple of days, make her feel good about herself. She'll realize, yeah, my hair is pretty uneven. I do need to go. I think she'll figure it out. Yeah, I think so. Yeah. We got home. She was starting to feel a bit better, but then that same woman texted her again with- Shut up, girl! Here's the number to my stylist. Luckily, she has an opening for you on Tuesday morning. Oh my God. These women are nasty. Why are they doubling down? They're nasty. Women are just nasty, though. Why would you say that? That set her off again. She started screaming and locked herself in our bathroom. Oh man. I made her breakfast this morning. She feels better now, but I really don't wanna talk about her hair ever again. I honestly don't know how to approach things from here, considering we are invited to my family's Christmas dinner. I'm just gonna go with the flow and don't care anymore. I had no idea a TikTok trend would end like this, but here we are. I wonder if he can text his mom. Yeah. Wife's got a pixie. I need you to tell her- You love it. Yeah, you text everyone in your family individually. You're like, hey. Or you don't want the trail up. If you don't want the text trail- Call them. Yeah, you call them. You say, hey, mom. You need to tell my wife. She's got- She looks like Anne Hathaway. Yeah, she looks like Anne Hathaway. I don't care how you actually think she looks. She looks like Anne Hathaway. Nothing is wrong with her hair. Got it? Got it. Comments, comment one. I think your wife needs to accept she gave herself a terrible haircut. She should also probably stop following TikTok trends, not the A-hole. Comment two. She can like it, but if people are giving her numbers of stylists and their availability, it must be really bad. Comment three. You need to be prepared for another meltdown at Christmas if someone mentions her hair. How will you handle that? If she wants to leave, what will you do? Best of luck. Opie says, I'm hoping she chooses not to go. So we stay at home and have a nice quiet Christmas together. But that's the end of that story. My father-in-law disrespected me multiple times so I made my husband choose between us. It's me or your dad. And there is a trigger warning for mentions of mistreatment. I, 34 female, have been with my husband, 32 male, for 11 years. My husband and his family are from another country, so when we started dating, I justified many things as cultural differences. But along the way, the disrespect never stopped. By the way, this comes from, I don't know what I'm doing, 3, 2, 1. And if you want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash okay story time subreddit. I'm Sophia. I'm Carly. And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we don't have all the answers. We only know what we do. So let us know what you would do in the comments. And Opie says, there are so many instances where my father-in-law disrespected me. But the one that broke the camel's back was this one. When I was 32, I gave birth to the first grandson of the family. In the last weeks of my pregnancy, father-in-law was divorcing, so I told my husband that we should let him stay in our guest room while he got his life together. It started with the fact that I didn't eat meat. So I bought a skillet for him to cook in his room, but he started cooking when I was working in my studio and the smell filled the space. I was pregnant, so the smell hit me harder and made it impossible to work. Even after I gave birth, he did the same during nap time, which still prevented me from working. And by the way, this comes directly from the r slash okay story time subreddit. Yeah, that is tough. I think pregnancy-wise, it would be nice for him to respect and be like, I understand this is actually making you ill to smell. Absolutely, yeah. Outside of pregnancy-wise, I kind of think you gotta let the man cook his meat. Yeah, I think after that, I would say I kind of have to deal with it a little bit. Like as long as he's not feeding you meat and he's respectful that that's your diet, you kind of also have to respect that that's his diet. Yeah, I agree. I also guess I'm not like the type of person who doesn't eat meat that is disgusted by the smell, because I still find the smell pretty appetizing. So I don't know if maybe that's not your experience. I'm picturing straight bacon every day. Which to me smells good, but I was struggling with my body image and every time he saw me, he would ask, when I was going to start going to the gym, you're gone. Ugh. You're gone. Sometimes I was struggling and alone and neither he nor my sister-in-law would even grab the baby so I could eat. They only came to ask, what I was eating? If I cooked something or if I was going to. He would come in the middle of dinner to look at my plate and comment, well, that was literally my only time to relax. They never had dinner with us, never helped with chores and never changed a diaper. It started to take a toll on me. One day, while having breakfast with my older daughter, 12 female at the time, he came into the kitchen to tell me he had already found an apartment. Thank goodness. I already knew, but I congratulated him and acted surprised. He then looked at my daughter and said, he bet we were throwing a party. I just stared at him, unsure of what to say. I couldn't let him disrespect me in front of my teenage daughter. While I was thinking of what to say, he asked her again. So I stopped him and asked, what was wrong with him and if that was necessary? He tried to justify it, but I was done and told him I didn't care about his explanation. I was done and tired of taking so much BS. I even cried and told him I was done letting him belittle me and involving my daughter was the line. I told my daughter to go and we left the dining room. I called my husband and told him everything. I was shaking and so angry. I grew up in a harmful household and was in a harmful relationship and I have CPTSD. The things he was doing were extremely triggering to the point that I didn't even wanna come home. I couldn't create, I was unhappy, I hated my body. Little did he know I was struggling with complications from a copper IUD. I'm allergic to copper and didn't know it. Well, aren't you pregnant right now? This is post-pregnancy. Yeah, yeah. Time jumped, I missed that part. Copper IUD is already supposed to create an allergic reaction, that's how it works. To like be doubly allergic to it, not great. Very reactive. You're definitely not getting pregnant. I was swollen and ended up at the hospital twice and spent three months with it in my body because no one wanted to take it out. But that's a whole other story, what? Time passed and he acted like he had changed but today was Christmas Eve and he invited us to his new girlfriend's house. He stopped every conversation to say that it was the best Christmas dinner in 11 years. The same amount of time I had been with my husband. Funny how that works. For the last three Christmases I hosted at our home, breaking my back cooking for them without any help. They didn't bring anything. We cooked everything ourselves, they only bought the food. I was so sad. When we left, I told my husband and instead of simply validating how I felt, he justified his behavior, saying that that's just the way he is and that he thinks he never said it that way. I didn't care. I just wanted to vent and be heard, especially because he had left to entertain our toddler two years. I'm sad, I have no family and I just wanted to be accepted. But my husband literally told me they hated me and would never accept me that way. Sorry, if your husband is telling you that his family hates you, maybe we should limit contact. Yeah, honestly, that's wild to me that a husband would just be like, yeah, they hate you. Yeah. And not try and fix that. Right. And not try and keep you away from them, not in like a high-due, but like make it so you don't have to interact with people who hate you. Yeah. It hurt a lot, even though it's probably true. My daughter is living with her bio dad for the first time this Christmas and I was planning to enjoy the evening with my husband and toddler, then go to my father-in-law's house to exchange gifts. Ooh, yeah, this is a tough one because it's like, obviously it's nothing like appalling, he's being terribly rude comments kind of thing. Like no one wants to be around and that's like super mean still. Yeah. I don't even want to say that's unappalling because it still is like, why are we doing this, dude? I just think the behavior of your husband is a little bit more serving to me. That's, I'm more like that. Yeah, I'm with you. I'm like, husband needs to step up and be like, dude, stop. Yeah, and it seems like he just excuses that behavior, which is not okay. Like I don't think that a valid excuse is like, he's just like that as a person. Yeah. After this, I don't want to. I even spent days making mugs for everyone as gifts, but now I don't want to give them away. They don't deserve my art, time, or effort. My husband wants to go anyway with our toddler and leave me alone. Christmas is hard for me and he's putting it on me. I either stay alone for two hours as he says or go with him again. He doesn't want me to go and go through this again. I feel like 11 years is way too long to not have boundaries. And I'm tired of being second on his list of priorities. He never takes free time from work unless it's to plan something with his family. And when that happens, he forgets that I become anxious when plans change. I'm picky with food and I am who I am. He usually helps me and accepts me, but when his family is around, he doesn't care and changes everything, ignoring me. I'm also neurodivergent and he knows this. I don't know if I'm the a-hole for asking him not to go. I feel like he needs to start putting us, his family, as a priority. But I don't know if I'm right for asking this. And that is the end of that story. What do you think? I think that the problem definitely lies more in like, your husband not supporting you. Yeah. Seems like it's a continuous issue. I'm not sure that two hours for like a Christmas visit is where I would personally draw the line of like, you can't go, but going forward, I would need more effort for like my direct family that we've built together. Absolutely. I would be having a conversation about, you need to start taking off time to hang out with your immediate family in my side. Not just with yours. And you need to stand up for me and I have to hear all of these terrible comments from your family members. Yeah, 1000%. And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go to the next one. My husband pulled a prank on me with my dream Christmas gift. Well, I'm gonna pull a prank where I break up with you except it's not a prank. The title is dramatic, but I'm very deeply hurt and seriously depressed and heartbroken. I love Christmas. And I always get so excited for it every year. I put so much effort into making Christmas nice and I always shower my husband with presents. This year, my husband's sister is visiting from overseas and I had to do all the Christmas gift shopping for his sister because my husband didn't lift a finger to shop for gifts for her. By the way, this comes from Avey and Empress. And if you want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash okay story time subreddit. I'm Carly. I'm Sophia. And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we don't have all the answers. We only know what we would do. So let us know what you would do in the comments. And Opie says, he wouldn't even respond when I kept asking him over and over again what we should get for his sister. I'm mentioning this just for context to show how seriously I take Christmas and how important it is for me to ensure everyone has a great Christmas and plenty of great gifts to open. Anyway, I gave my Christmas list to my husband and made it clear how much I really wanted this fancy tea kettle. I mentioned this many times so that he knew how important it was to me that Santa bring me that tea kettle. I knew he got me the tea kettle because before Christmas, I saw a box in the garage that said the brand on it. Oh no. Even if I hadn't seen the box, I knew he would get the kettle because he knows how much I wanted it. And he did drop me a hint that Santa was gonna spend a lot of money on me this year. To be fair, I will admit that he did get me all the gifts I wanted for Christmas. Here's where the heartbreak comes in. Uh-oh. A few days before Christmas, after he wrapped his gifts and put them under the tree, I noticed that none of them were the right size to contain the tea kettle. Oh no. I mentioned this and asked him to please wrap the kettle and put it under the tree. He failed to do so. On Christmas, we opened gifts and there was no tea kettle. After all the gift opening was done, I asked him where my tea kettle was because I knew he got it for me. He ignored me and made comments to the effect that maybe I could hope for it next year. At this point, I started getting annoyed. I kept asking him to cut it out and give me my kettle, but he kept ignoring me. This escalated as I gradually got more and more upset. I started to doubt my senses and started wondering what happened to that box. Did I really see the brand on that box? Yes, of course, I'm not likely to hallucinate. Could he have somehow had, could he have somehow had second thoughts and returned it? If so, why on earth would he do that? Since he knows how much I wanted the kettle. Why is he doing this? Where the heck is my kettle? I was so confused and annoyed, compounded by the fact that my husband just kept ignoring my inquiries and seemed unconcerned that I was getting more and more upset. Finally, I just blew up and angrily spouted off about how I got him everything he wanted and more, but he couldn't give me the one gift that everyone knew I was excited about. I even angrily got my iPad out and started ordering one for myself while muttering about how messed up this was. You're being unreasonable. I pause. This is insane. You're being unreasonable, Opie. We are throwing a fit because we didn't get a Christmas gift. You're being unreasonable. I don't care how much you wanted it. He doesn't, he's not required to get it for you. Yeah, there are so many times where I didn't get like a thing that I was like, oh, I really want this. Oh yeah, like they're definitely gonna give me this. And I didn't get it. And you know what you do? You sit down and you go, oh, I love everything else. And you smile through the pain of whatever disappointment. We certainly don't do this in front of everybody too. Like this is in front of sister-in-law. Is it actually? It's on Christmas day. She was coming to spend Christmas. I thought this was just that. If this was in front of anyone else, that would be insane. All I know is that she was buying gifts for sister-in-law to open on Christmas. I think it's just them together. Okay. But regardless, still you're throwing a fit. Weird. You're throwing a fit over a tea kettle. I don't care how much you wanted it. I can understand being like, why didn't he get me the thing that I literally said I wanted the most? You could be upset and you could maybe bring it up later. But like when you're opening gifts, honestly. And he's got you the rest of your list. I think you're being really unreasonable and a little ungrateful. My husband didn't flinch. My brother and sister-in-law were there witnessing all of this. You are literally throwing a... Yes, I did. Yes, I got 37. You're literally Dudley Dursley. You're Dudley. That is so embarrassing. That is so embarrassing. You are, okay, now you're undoubtedly the a-hole. I thought it was just you and him alone. And I was like, wow, that's messed up. You were in front of people? Total. At this point, I was very deeply upset and Christmas was totally ruined. Yeah, you ruined it. Later, I discovered that my tea kettle had been sitting unwrapped on a chair in the other room, apparently waiting for me to find it. As soon as I saw it, I burst into tears because I felt stabbed in the heart that he would pull such a cruel prank on Christmas. I asked him repeatedly many, many times to please wrap my kettle and put it under the tree. But instead he chose to hide my gift from me and ignore my questions about where it was when it became clear it wasn't included in the gift unwrapping. You suck. I was so devastated I couldn't even stay for Christmas dinner. I withdrew to my bedroom, feeling utterly shattered. I can't even look at the tea kettle or any of my gifts. I haven't opened anything. I'm too traumatized. I sent him the attached text. You texted this man. You couldn't even have a conversation. Face to face, are you kidding me? You're a child. I don't like you. Yeah. To explain how I feel and why what he did feel so deeply violating to me. I feel like I can't trust him anymore. I understand that in his mind, maybe this was a funny joke. But once he saw how upset I was getting, he had so many opportunities to back down and end it. But he kept going with me. It almost makes me feel like he was enjoying tormenting me. He hasn't apologized at all. Even after my text explaining how this made me feel, he came in while I was crying in bed, lied down and hugged me. I told him not to touch me. And he said that my reaction is not normal. And that what he did was nothing. He keeps trying to shrug this off, but I feel so deeply hurt and broken inside. Your reaction is not normal. You're insane. You're having a toddler tantrum over getting what you wanted. Right. I'm like, did you not get something as a child? And that's just like really sticking with you? Like what's happening here? You were Dudley Dursley. The bottom line is that I feel like he deliberately tried to upset me and torture me. And at the very least, he didn't care at all that I was so upset. All he had to do at any point along the way was say, okay, honey, you do have another gift. Here it is. Why didn't he stop me when I was ordering the kettle for myself? Because you're crazy. He just kept on with the charade. From my perspective, it's almost like he planned it this way to show his sister. Look how crazy my wife can be. Yeah, you are crazy. Yeah. It's not on him. You're crazy. You deliberately provoked me in a very inappropriate way on Christmas just to get some sort of sick, twisted upper hand. This feels like you have like paranoid schizophrenia. Like you literally think that he's coming after you for getting a gift for you. I'm just confused. We've got a little bit left. Anticipating questions, this didn't escalate quickly. Everything was very festive and nice during the gift exchange and unwrapping, which took almost an hour because there were so many presents. I always go overboard for him and I went overboard for his sister as well. I did not erupt or blow up out of nowhere. I kept asking about the kettle after the gift exchange was over and this was a very slow boil before I lost my cool. Anyway, please let me know what you think. My family seems to think I'm very sensitive, but I don't think they understand that this is not about a gift. It's about him planning and executing a prank on me that he knew was hurting me. And he kept on while watching things unravel seemingly unconcerned. Even after I explained to him how it made me feel, he still doesn't seem to care and hasn't apologized. You need to apologize to him and everyone who was at that party. Yeah. Also, I think she reversed it earlier. She said, my brother and sister-in-law, but it is her husband's sister and brother-in-law? No, that makes sense. It's my brother-in-law and sister-in-law, so that would be great. Earlier, she just said, my brother and my sister-in-law. So I mistook it as like, oh, he probably sees this all the time. It's husband's sister, which I thought that's what she said at the beginning, but then we switched it at one point. So this is probably new for everyone in that room. Yikes, big old yikes. Wave some comments. Comment one, you're overreacting. Well, I don't think your husband should have been ignoring you or playing around when you asked about the cup. You are still an adult and it is on you to regulate your emotions, no matter what someone else is doing. With that being said, I agree that your husband should have said it was a prank when you were visibly getting worked up. Does he frequently do things like this to get a reaction out of you? If he does, he is not a safe partner for you. Also, why are you buying presents for his sister? If he wanted his sister to have presents, he could have and should have brought them. I think that's another part of the reason that this is impacting you so much. You feel like you went above and beyond for him and his family just for him to basically antagonize you and ended up with the opposite experience of him and his family members. That was a terrible comment. That's the only comment we got? Terrible comment. No, no, we are not giving OP that much leeway. I do agree that if he wasn't sitting there in shock and he realized that she was getting upset, sure, you say, ha ha, it's in the other room. I think she still would have been upset. She still would have been like, I told you to wrap this last night, why didn't you wrap it and put it out at the tree? Blah blah blah blah blah. The fact that she was before, regardless of like, yes, maybe he should have stopped the explosion from happening, but she shouldn't have exploded. Yeah, we do need emotional isolation. Like you do not act like that in front of guests. That's crazy to me. I am checking for this. Oh, we have the text. Oh boy. Let's see. This is from OP to husband. I am crushed that you chose to turn my biggest Christmas wish into an inappropriate and very cruel prank and that you stuck with it even while it was obvious I was getting more and more upset. You had so many opportunities to back down but you kept with the cruel prank despite my visible upset. That made me feel like you don't care about my feelings. And even that you were enjoying hurting me and mocking me on the day that should be about family and support, I ended up feeling dismissed and unimportant. I'm humiliated, traumatized and deeply hurt. Oh my God. And he said, oh no, turn the light off outside. You opiate. Dang. 100% overreacted, just astronomically overreacted. And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go to the next one. Hey, this is Riley, your favorite Southern Belle. 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I keep on going on it. Get that Toyota electric feeling with the all new, all electric Toyota Urban Cruiser available with 0% APR representative and 1500 pound deposit contribution and save 1500 pounds with the Toyota Electrified Saving. Visit your nearest Toyota center, Jemka Bromley. Price from 2995 available on Toyota PCP when financed through Toyota Financial Services by 30th of June, 2026. Optional final payment and damages may be required through website conditions apply. Babe, it's Jem. Just for snowing you because I'm so busy. I can't even type right now. I'm working on that big presentation for my new launch. I'm making it on Canva mobile like you suggested and it's making everything iconic. It's a bit noisy, babe. Malts is going off. Anyways, I'm going to ping the presentation to you now so you can see what I mean. Yeah, mother. Gotta go, hon. Thanks for introducing me to Canva. Love ya. My brother insulted our parents so I reminded him of everything they sacrificed. What did they sacrifice for you? My mom and dad aren't educated. They came from poverty. My dad sold vegetables and my mom was a tailor. We are three children. I, 26 female, 22 male, brat, and eldest sister, 28 female. Despite not having much resources, our parents gave us a good education and made sure we got a degree. They took out a loan for me to study in a neighboring state college and I tried to make up for all the sacrifices they made. Mom sold gold for our needs. By the way, this comes from Ancient Champion 5303 and if you want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash okay storytime subreddit, I'm Sophia. I'm Carly and we're here to give good advice goofly. Well, we don't have all the answers. We only know what we do. So let us know what you would do in the comments. And OP says, both me and my elder sister work in a national bank and make good money to take care of our parents who have zero pennies saved for their retirement. We have married our husbands and we were clear to them that our parents will be taken care of by us and they also wanted the same. So it works for us. Mom and dad live with elder sister and take care of elder sister's children. So it works for all. Buying mom jewelry was the proudest moment of my life. Our brother always hated my parents' profession and always felt ashamed to take our mom to a parent teacher meeting because our mom can't speak English. Teachers were unhappy with his attitude and my parents really felt dejected throughout his school life. Even when we tried to correct him, mom and dad asked us not to do that by saying it's just a teenage thing. They wanted a son as it was pressured by grandparents to have a son. That being said, we were given equal opportunity and love by parents. We put him through engineering college and funded it to help our parents. He got placed in three multinational corporations and excelled at our country's biggest engineering exam, which will lead to a prestigious officer job that he can retire from at 60. And the respect you get is a different level. He is the most academic among the three siblings. So we plan to throw a party at my house and he wanted to invite some top level people. He told us to keep our parents at home. That's so rude. I and my sister make clear that isn't gonna happen and he has to be respectful. Party happened and when some officer asked where are his parents, he said they're home resting, which was heard by our mother. She kept crying and told dad, both went to leave. I was confused and asked and they told me. Finally, my sister and I snapped. We insulted our brother and called him a brat and told him about all the sacrifices they made. We told him how much of a pathetic failure of a son he was and that we're going to disown him from now on. We told him we gave him a free pass as the youngest child, but we won't take the disrespect for our parents who tried to give us everything. He started a fire back saying that our parents' work isn't respectful but was stopped by the senior officials and his friends at the party. They all said he's pathetic and they want nothing to do with him. The officer even said he came from an orphanage and continued to shame my brother. After the party, the brat has lost us, friends and respect. He kept messaging from different IDs, but we have blocked all of them. Mom and dad are still saying that they want to give him a second chance, but that isn't going to happen. My mom's point is that he is still young and we should not be so hard on him, which is making me feel like maybe I ruined my brother's reputation. How old is brother? 22. It's pretty young. That doesn't mean that he can get away with doing that or saying that, but it is young enough where I think the parents need to step in and be like, that's unacceptable, where you guys should step in and be like, that's unacceptable. Yeah. And I don't want to be like, maybe they shouldn't have done it so publicly because I think that that might have been the only way that he was going to learn about it, but you potentially just ruined his long term career. Which does kind of suck, but he was being a brat. Yeah. Comment one, not the A-hole. Unfortunately, your mom and dad giving him a free pass to be rude, because he's a teenager, has not done your brother any favors. He's still rude and disrespectful and basically got what he deserved. He should work on being a better person instead of pestering you. Comment two says, tell your parents that this is a lesson he must learn or he will have a miserable life. Look at how his coworkers responded to him. He will never succeed unless he changes. Keep him blocked until he has truly learned his lesson. Comment three says, having a go at him during the party was a bad idea on your part and your sister's OP. You don't do these things in public if you want a receptive audience. And yes, probably did untold damage to his reputation. That's my rating of everyone's sex here. OP says, he insulted parents publicly, so yeah, he deserved it. And there is an update. I'm kind of in the mix of like, should have gotten consequences. Like, yes, tell him off, but maybe not in front of everyone. Yeah, I'm at the same point. Because if you are gonna cut him off, let him just have his job and don't even worry about it. But now he might not have that and he might come back to parents kind of thing. Yeah, and then they, you know. It would have been easier to cut him off if you just let him have his job for the rest of his life. I also just think like, in general, not even sparing his feelings or whatever, it's not really about him. I think in general, when you're having a family related conversation, it is best to do that not in like a public setting. Yeah. Just like polite. Yeah, I can understand he was already being rude. Yeah, in this situation, he was being like, they're not, yeah, my parents aren't here, which is so rude. So I'm kind of like flip flopping here because I can understand both sides of this. There is a part of me too that just hates public confrontation. That's what, that's me. So I think it's just like, I need to get past that uncomfortableness, but I can't. Yeah, no, that's kind of where I'm at. It's like, I understand why you did it and why you reached that boiling point, but also I'm just like, but there's an update. Three days later, instead of apologizing, he has doubled down, oh boy, and has gone fully zero contact, blocked us all. My parents finally have seen the light and decided to let him go from their heart. My sister and I earn well enough to take care of them in their old age and our families. We're taking them to a Pan-Asia trip this summer. We love our brother, but he can't be forever babied by us. I'm making sure my son doesn't turn out like him and help him learn every tour like his sisters and make him humble and self-reliant. My brother was gifted academically, but I wish his heart was gifted too. No, I stand by it's like, I think it's just my personal issues. Like he was a brat. I think he will probably as he grows. Realize that he was a brat, hopefully. Kids in their early 20s tend to, as they grow, realize, oh, my parents are people and did so much for me and I would not have gotten here without them. Right now he's like, I'm only 22 and I'm thriving. Yeah, he's got like these amazing job offers and stuff. So hopefully. He's got a chip on his shoulder. Yeah, hopefully he figures it out. I still wish him the best and to have success in life, but I won't be taking him back. Even if he asks. I'm very cold when I need to be. He will never be allowed in my life again unless he makes a public apology. A simple sorry won't cut it for me. Anyways, I recently bought a house with my hard work and I can't let him spoil my mood forever. I'm thankful to my mom and dad for giving me an education and helping me to succeed in life. I wish he had understood their sacrifices. Comment One says his job is gonna get a lot harder, especially considering his coworkers heard him and thought he was trash. He probably will be back sooner than later when he is fully iced out at work and doesn't get promotions. Edit, I completely miss that. You just closed on your new place. Congratulations, OP. I'm glad his negativity isn't getting you down and that you and your family are moving forward and upward. Comment Two says, I totally agree, but I don't think life works that way. There's a ton of stuck up people that will agree with OP's brother and look down on people working manual jobs. If the world has taught us anything, it's that people will just forget transgressions or bad behavior after a long time as long as he keeps his head down. There's tons of awful people in high level positions that will never pay for what they've done. As long as they produce the work, most people really don't care. It's the sad truth. And comment three, at least your parents did their best and raised more than one kid right. I also pity your brother because being ashamed of your family because their jobs aren't respectable is pathetic. If they worked hard and kept you out of poverty, their jobs are more than good enough. And that is the end of that story. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he got, you know, he made a choice and now has lost his family. And hopefully in the years to come, he figures out, you know, what he did was wrong. I have hoped that he will. And that's the end of this story. We're going to go to the next one. My mother's disgusting habits put our newborn at risk. So I asked her to leave. You're gross. I just had a baby. And the plan was my mom was going to drive a few states away. She was going to stay at my house, watch my dogs, be there for the delivery and help with the baby. She tells me a few weeks before that she's bringing her dogs with her. I had to tell her that one of her dogs, male, he's on everything and is not allowed upstairs. We just put in new floors. She said she understood. We cleaned out a whole room in the basement. I told her she didn't have to sleep down there, but the dogs needed to stay in the basement. By the way, this comes from Rude Conclusion 5948. And if you want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash okay story time subreddit. I'm Carly. I'm Sophia. And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we don't have all the answers. We only know what we would do. So let us know what you would do in the comments. And OP says, the first night was fine. The dogs were ridiculous though. And she didn't really control them. The second day she put them in the basement like I asked, but her bigger dog whines the entire time, like loudly. We left that night to go to the hotel because I was scheduled to be induced early the next morning. Well, my water broke. I called her to let her know, but told her not to hurry because I wasn't contracting or dilated. She told me she was in a panic and that's why she did this. She had the dogs upstairs and put them behind the baby gate in the kitchen, which connects to a mudroom where my cats have their litter box. I didn't know until she got there. I asked about my dogs and then asked if her dogs were in the basement. When she told me I was pissed, now my cats can't use their litter box unless they sneak into the room. The whole night she was trying to get me to have a C-section and she was being really weird and comparing her pregnancies to mine. She kept making backhanded jokes too, specifically to my partner. It was really weird. I had to borderline yell at her because I didn't want the C-section. She did finally go home because she knew I was upset about the dogs and I would be in labor for a while. On a positive note, she did clean my house and make us a couple easy to reheat meals. I didn't ask her to clean my house, so it was nice of her. I did ask for her to help with the baby for the first couple days though, and I'll get to that real fast though. I don't think it's insane that she brought her dogs. I do think it's crossing the boundary to let them upstairs, but if you're asking someone to come stay with you for a week and they have dogs, they gotta come. Yes, but... But you keep them in the basement where they were asked to stay. I mean, like, at the... I probably, I think that if I knew someone was about to have a baby and they were like, hey, can you come help? I probably would not want to make any more stress happen. I wouldn't want to, but what would you do with your dog? If it's just this week, then I'd be like, yeah, I get someone to sit the dogs, but if it's extended, maybe I see that, but like, regardless of that, definitely shouldn't have gone upstairs. Yeah, because she was already gonna watch OP's dogs as well. Yeah. So she comes back when I call her to let her know I'm about to start pushing. She shows up. But there were complications. I ended up needing a C-section. Without going into detail, I had a very traumatic C-section, my first pregnancy, which is why I didn't want one. I noticed while the nurse and doctor and partner were consoling me, she was just standing there. She didn't even come up to my bed. She just left when the doctor said he would get ready. Fast forward, we get home and we have the baby. We open the door and the house smells like sa- No, no, I immediately, if someone was smoking- No, that is such a line. Yeah, I'd be like, no, you gotta go. I don't care if you were to help me, you gotta go. Yeah. She not only smokes in my house, knowing we were bringing the baby home, but threw away the butts in our trash inside the house. That's just like a fire hazard? And just gross. Almost set the house on fire? My partner was pissed. We also found several spots in the house where her dog peed on the floor. Even though she said they weren't upstairs, we knew she was lying. We're still finding pee spots. I knew she shut my dogs in our room the entire time because I found things that were chewed up. She was supposed to watch my dogs, not lock them up in their own home. I explained this to her that this was a crucial time because we were bringing home a newborn and it should be a comfortable bonding experience and not one filled with anxiety because of being locked up and two strange dogs in the house. Why didn't she get a dog sitter is beyond me. She drove 14 hours with them and then didn't bother asking anyone here to watch them. Oh my God. And then we had such a rough first night because you know, newborn stuff, she was supposed to help us, but she didn't. I was cranky of course because I didn't sleep at the hospital. So I was on day like three or four of no sleep. My dad had taken the dogs for the night and I told her the dogs could absolutely not come back. They were too loud and it was too much. So she decides to throw a pity party the next day and says she's just gonna head back home. I talked to her and told her we still need help with the baby if she wanted to stay. This was the whole point of her being here and she was more worried about her dogs. She showed me a picture of her dog that my dad took and I noticed the dog looked cleaner. I asked her if she bathed him at our house and she said no. But when I went to take a shower, it was clogged with white fur like, again at this point, like, she's not helping with the baby. She's causing you undue stress or unneeded stress. Let's just get rid of her. It all felt so selfish. Like her dogs and bad habits were more important. Mind you, I'm a huge dog person. My pups mean everything to me and I love other people's pets, but this was too much. It was all very weird because she had gotten so much better with someone for mental health issues. And our relationship had gotten better. Then she did all of this and lied. She did confess to smoking in the house, but lied and said it was only one, which was BS. If I just confront her, she will just keep lying. She used to do it all the time. My advice is to send her home. Yeah. Say hey. Thank you so much. You met the baby. Bye. Yeah, I mean, you can be nice about it or you can say you violated our trust. Yeah. And did this, this and this. And then she goes, well, no, I didn't. It's like, okay, either way. Cool. Bye. Still too much. Get out. But anyway, my partner who was doing everything for me is sick of it all. She said she, and she said she isn't welcome in our home anymore. I'm in agreement, but I don't know how to tell her without her gaslighting me and throwing a huge pity party. At it, I was so upset I didn't clarify. She left early yesterday morning. It just has been getting to us because the house still smells like cigarettes and we're still finding peace spots. And we have an update. Update. My partner just found dog crap all over the basement. She didn't even clean up after them. Ugh. Dreadful. Disgusting. She's not even taking the dogs outside to go to bed. Well, now you know you can't rely on her. Yeah. And that's that. And that's the end of this story. We're going to go to the next one. My step siblings refused to let me care for our father because I'm not of his blood. Let them take care of them. Trigger warning mentions of mistreatment. So this is a very complicated situation and I'm going to make this long for backstory. My mother was married three times and had one daughter during each of her marriages. My older sisters are 46 and 43 and I am the youngest at 33. We come from a very harmful toxic family. By the way, this comes from SkitsoNew22. And if you want to spend your own stories, go to the r slash okay story time, subreddit. I'm Sophia. I'm Carly. And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we don't have all the answers. We only know what we do, so let us know what you would do in the comments. And Opie says, my mother's first husband divorced her before my oldest sister was even eight months old. That marriage ended quickly and my sister never really had a father figure from him. My mother's second husband, we'll call him Steve, loved my mother and sister dearly. He even adopted my oldest sister Jane before my middle sister, Stacy, was even conceived. Steve loved both his girls equally and never showed favorites. Steve is a great man, but he was a heavy drinker, so he and my mom divorced when Stacy was seven. They still co-parented very well though. Then my mom met my dad and then my mom met my dad, we'll call him Marv. He promised her the world was very loving to my sisters and said if he ever had kids, he would want another princess. My mom was hooked. They got married, had me, and Marv's true colors started to show. I had the biggest rooms, the best toys, I was the smartest, the sweetest, and the most clever. My sisters were just obnoxious, disrespectful, and a huge burden. Then he gave my mom an ultimatum. Send Jane and Stacy to live with Steve full time or Marv would take me and leave and she would never see us again. I was two when this happened. It broke her, but she didn't want another marriage to fail and was so scared she would lose me so she sent my sisters to Steve who was so happy to have his girls back. Marv worked out of state as a contractor when I was three and was maybe home one weekend every two months. Because of that, my mom and I would often travel upstate to visit Steve and my sisters. Steve was always kind to me. It became a joke after a while because he would always buy me two boxes of animal crackers. One for me and the other for me to give to his dog, Buster. I was a sharer. Eventually Jane started getting into trouble so she came to live with us. I loved having at least one sister there. I would constantly sneak into her room and sleep next to her. But my mother started becoming harmful herself and Marv is a manipulative, self-absorbed person, liar and a serial cheater. Jane ran away from home a few times. Stacy, who was still hurt by Marv's antics, rarely visited. But when she did, I was glued to her. Marv pretended to be happy and welcoming, but behind closed doors, he would fight with my mother at night about kids that weren't his. At the same time, he would tell everyone he had three amazing daughters. Steve never said a bad word about Marv but unfortunately Marv had plenty of BS to spew about Steve. I never believed it though. Steve was a part of my life for two decades. I respect and love that man and he is still family in my eyes. When my mom passed away 13 years ago, I tried to invite him to the funeral. Marv uninvited him and said it was not normal or appropriate. Eight years ago, I got married but in order to receive my dowry, my mother left me. I had to play by Marv and his new wife's rules. I wanted to invite Steve to my wedding and stated that he was important to me and my sisters. He was a part of our lives, whether Marv liked it or not. Marv tried to cancel my wedding so I relented. I know it hurt Steve and it is something I regret to this day. We stopped communicating around that time but we were still friends on social media and would chat occasionally. I knew Steve was battling cancer again and when Stacy told me not to visit her this Christmas, I knew things were bad. Yesterday, Jane texted me all the details of what Steve has been going through. Honestly, that upset me because I had been asking for updates for months only to be met with radio silence. Then she dropped the bomb. Steve has come home to pass away. I am in nursing so I told her I would make sure my kids and husband were settled and I would drive through the night to be there and help Steve. I wanted to make sure he was comfortable and cared for properly. Jane said I was not allowed to come because I'm not his daughter and they do not need or want me there. Here's where I may be the a-hole. I called my grandma crying and said I knew I was the black sheep of the family and Marv had made things so stressful that being his daughter meant I was cut out as well. I have no contact with Marv. I am my own person and I am a dang good nurse who loves Steve. To be left in the dark and not allowed to come because I'm not blood feels like BS. I thought there was gonna be a break and there is no break. No. But there is a little bit left to the story. My grandma said I needed to take a deep breath and had no right to have my feelings hurt because my sisters are losing their dad, not me. I screamed that I had every right to feel whatever I felt and that he's still my family. Stacy said I'm not an a-hole and explained that Jane and Steve's second ex-wife are running the show. She said even she is barely allowed over. She knows I care and want to help. Jane, my grandma, my aunt and my uncle said my grandma didn't deserve that reaction and that I'm too sensitive and trying to turn it into a pity party about me. I just want to help care for a man I consider family and give my sister's peace of mind. He deserves respect, care, tenderness and dignity. I wanted to make sure he had that rather than a paid stranger coming in and doing the bare minimum. Thanks for reading and that's the end of the story. I am. It seems like Stacy is just kind of pushing out anyone who she doesn't think is related because Jane was adopted. So maybe that's part of the reason why Jane is being put out, which is totally unacceptable. Yeah. Passing brings out crazy things in people. And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go to the next one. Hey, it's Carly. Your favorite axolotl host here. We're going to get back to the stories but here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors. No gloss, no filter, just stories, without fear. Addiction is a disease and it should be looked upon as any other disease. How did you cope with a reckless father like me? Join me, Pooja Bhatt, as I sit down every week with directors, actors, musicians, technicians and beyond. You don't need to work with the biggest people and the biggest sound to have great music. I have gone through the Saab Siddhi Khachakar. Reach the pinnacle, stung by the snigger, I've fallen down again. Yeah, I am not writing actively anymore and when I see my old work it kind of saddens me. I'm only as good as the last shot that I gave. Mom's gone but don't shut the theater. The show must go on. Listen to my weekly podcast, the Pooja Bhatt show on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Come for the honesty, stay for the fire. Rural Britain, is there any greater value out there than giga clear full fiber from only 19 pounds a month? It's out of this world, speed and reliability, vast upload and downloadiness right here in rural tranquility. Saturn's rings, is that a bull? Gigaclear, faster broadband for rural Britain from only 19 pounds a month. Teas at seas apply, 18 month contract, prices may rise during contract. Check availability at gigaclear.com. My sister used her kid to guilt me to give her money so I snapped. Decoy, I 38 female and my youngest sister, 32 female, let's call her Karen, usually get along. But ever since she started dating her new boyfriend, let's call him John, things have become strained. This is mainly because she keeps demanding money from me. By the way, this comes from seriously, oh, WWJD. And if you want us to make your own stories, go to the R slash okay story time subreddit. I'm Carly, I'm Sophia, and we're here to give good advice goofily, but we don't have all the answers, we only know what we would do. So let us know what you would do in the comments. For reference, I work a demanding job that pays decently, but a huge chunk of my income goes towards my loans and my special needs animals. Karen has a son, nine year old, from her previous relationship, and a recent boyfriend, John, who also has a son, eight years old, from his previous relationship. Karen enrolled both kids in an after school martial arts program, and they compete in tournaments nationwide. The kids love it, and I have never had an issue with that. On top of that, Karen has been single-handedly supporting John, his moving business, and his son. In short, Karen has paid thousands, and John rarely repays her for anything. Karen also has a spending problem, such as buying ATVs and 12-inch tablets with Wi-Fi plans. On top of the kids' martial arts, private classes, trips, and other expenses. Regardless of what Karen does with her money, that has always been her choice. This includes her relationship with John. One day, Karen approached me asking for $1,000 to buy a new laptop. Instead, I offered her my laptop as an alternative. I barely use it beyond watching Netflix, and I had just updated it, so it ran really well. Karen got upset and said she did not want it, insinuating that she needed a new laptop. Eventually, she begrudgingly took my laptop. Why did you even give her your laptop? You know, it's crazy. Why? Like, who are they again? What's the relationship? Sisters, I think. It's crazy. A couple weeks later, Karen came back and asked for $1,500, saying she needed the money for bills. With the frequent requests, I did not feel comfortable, and told her no. She begged, but I stayed firm and left since I was headed out. She followed me as I got into the car with our mom, Lucy. Karen then told our mom that she should tell me to give her money. I laughed because it was absurd that Karen thought I would do it. Lucy told Karen that she had drained her savings and given her everything she had. That caught my attention, and that is how I found out Karen had been borrowing thousands from our mom for months. Karen had not paid Lucy back and insisted she would have plenty of money from her tax return to cover what she owed. I was angry, but let it go. Lucy's an adult and can make her own decisions, but I decided that I would refuse to give Lucy money, period. That was until Karen started using her eight-year-old son to ask me for money. On another occasion, I was in the car with Lucy, Karen, and her son. I was chatting with my friends on my headset when I overheard Karen and her son talking about his project. Karen then told her son to ask his aunt, me, to buy the project supplies for him. Karen figured she would use her son to start asking me for money. Dumbfounded, I didn't respond, but Lucy offered to get the materials, and Karen was content. A week later, the same scenario happened with Lucy, me, Karen, and her son in the car. Karen told her son to tell me to give him bookfare money, and he threw a paper at me with a list of books to buy. Karen then said I owed her son a gift because I do not do enough for him like I do for our other nieces and nephews. She called me his rich auntie, and said I should be happy to buy whatever he wants. She was serious and kept smirking at me. I was furious, but held my tongue because no eight-year-old should hear what I wanted to say. Karen then started telling Lucy about the 14 tournaments her son would be doing next year across the states in the next seven months. She mentioned how she could save money by staying with relatives or avoiding lodging fees. I pointed out that it would still be expensive with gas, food, tournament fees, and time off work. Karen dismissed me and said she would figure it out. After the kids were dropped off, Karen asked what I was buying her son for Christmas. She said again that I owed her son a gift. My son really likes Gucci. He loves Gucci bags. And extra cans of gas for the car. Yeah, he loves that. Oh, it's his favorite thing. He also really wants a new computer. At that point, I had enough and I flat out told her I was not buying any Christmas gifts this year, and then I did not owe her or her son anything. Mm-mm-mm. I explained that I do not have kids by choice and that her decision to have kids does not entitle them to my money. I also told her that how I spend my money is on my terms. Karen said nothing. So I thought the issue was dropped. You've already been doing it, but just don't give her anything. Anytime she asks for anything, you're like, no, sorry. Stick to your pu-pues. Yeah, maybe sell your ATVs, girl. Yeah, sell your ATVs, sell your iPads. Recently, both Karen and our mom brought it up again, saying it was unfair how much I had done for Jenny's kids compared to Karen's. For context, Jenny, 36, female, is our middle sister with three kids and is a repeat offender. Last year, Jenny was arrested five separate times in front of her children for various reasons. During those times, Lucy, Karen, and I helped care for her kids until Jenny made bond. During one of those times, I bought Jenny's kids' coats, shoes, and clothes because they had nothing appropriate to wear. It was a low blow that Karen and Lucy used this as guilt against me. I told them both that it is my money and I will spend it how I want. I added that they needed to drop it because I was not budging. In my opinion, if Karen is that broke, she should cut back on the expenses, find a part-time job, or ask someone else, like John, or her son's father for money. Reddit court, can you please tell me, am I the A-hole? Very much not the A-hole. I think those are both reasonable things to ask her to do. I can't imagine being like, well, you bought her other sister's kids' things and it was like, necessities. Yeah, like things they needed when their mom was arrested in front of them. Yeah. Insane. Hold strong, OP. Hold strong. And that's the end of this story. No gloss, no filter, just stories, spoken without fear. A person who is not generous cannot be an artist. The world will be at peace only when it is ruled by poet-syn philosophers. Listen to my weekly podcast, the Pooja Bhachow on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Come for the honesty, stay for the fire. This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed human.