S2 EP 26 - Internet Culture & Emotional Health: The Safety Dance

Well, hey everybody. It's a beautiful day to bust a few cognitive distortions. How's it going? My name is Suzanne M. Swain, EDS, LMSW, and I'd like to welcome you back to episode three in our Internet Safety and Technology series. Today, we're going to be talking about something that is shaping almost every part of modern childhood. And that is how kids experience the Internet emotionally. For many kids, it's friendship and identity, belonging, stress, emotional regulation, comparison, pressure, and social interaction that's really happening nonstop. Honestly, I think adults are only beginning to understand how intense that experience can be for a developing nervous system. I mean, research consistently keeps showing that social rejection activates many of the same pain centers in the brain as physical pain. So when kids are excluded from group chats, embarrassed online, you know, ignored socially, or caught in constant comparisons, it's like their brains can't even experience that as a real emotional threat. And unlike a lot of adults, kids today often do not get emotional recovery time. Social interaction follows them home in their pockets. And I mean, they're so worried about likes and comments and streaks and DMs and all that stuff. I mean, don't you think that's probably really emotionally exhausting for them? We also know that during adolescence, the emotional centers of the brain mature a lot faster than the frontal lobe systems. And those are responsible for impulse control and regulation. But in plain English, I mean, middle schoolers are neurologically wired to feel social experience as deeply while still developing skill sets to manage those emotions, you know, in real time. That's a lot. And honestly, I think many families are becoming genuinely afraid of technology. And that's not what I want to see. I have an educational specialist in technology. I want to help bring good technology to families. I talk to parents all the time, and they feel really overwhelmed and honestly terrified trying to figure out what is safe anymore. The social media, group chats, AI, deep fakes, definitely, online predators, impulsive posting and bullying. I mean, it feels like families are being asked to navigate something incredibly powerful without any kind of a roadmap. And because of that, many families are feeling really stuck between two extremes. It's like either completely unrestricted access or feeling like they need to avoid the screen altogether. And I find that really sad. But the reality, it's technology isn't going to go away. So kids still need to support learning how to navigate the digital life safely and thoughtfully and emotionally intelligently because this is the world they're growing up in. Honestly, I think many families are not looking for control, but they're more looking for clarity. I mean, they're trying to understand is there a kid emotionally okay? That's all they want to know. And especially for neurodivergent kids, anxious kids, kids with ADHD, autism or kids with, who just really internalized stress quickly because they're really smart, overload really often shows up digitally before adults notice it face to face. And that is exactly why I wanted to find out about someone who is doing it right. And that is what led me to bark in the first place. See, I was looking for something that could help kids feel safer online, but help families stay aware enough to notice when these things underneath the surface may not be okay anymore. So I do want to say clearly before I go any further, this conversation is unsolicited. Okay, bark. I have not asked them to make any kind of financial commitment to this podcast right now because I wanted to keep the talk real. I reached out because I thought the approach was really interesting. And after vetting them for a long time online, I reached out to say, I'd love to talk to you. So that's what this is about. And I think this could be a real tool that can help families. So today I am joined by Adam Brooks from the Bark Company to tell us a little bit about what bark can do. And I think they may blow your mind a bit. And one thing that really stood out to me when I was learning more about bark's vision is it's really cool. They are approaching digital safety in a way that feels really thoughtful, innovative, and really centered around connection of families, which is awesome. So rather than simply treating technology as something families should fear, bark is exploring how technology can help families stay more emotionally connected, more aware, more supported when kids gradually build independence and healthy digital skills over time. Right? So I especially appreciated that their approach isn't just about monitoring devices. That's not the thing. It's about helping families think through emotional safety, physical safety, communication, executive functioning, as well as their own kids' independence while developing skills in a digital world. And this world is becoming increasingly complex psychologically and socially for them. So what can help everybody? So Adam, hi. Thank you so much for being here today. Thank you so much for having me. I'm super excited to be here. Oh, that's great. I really appreciate your time. Well, one thing I think adults are still under—they're really underestimating, honestly, is just how emotionally immersive growing up online has become. So what is something kids are dealing with online right now that most adults are completely underestimating, something that will just blow their mind? Yeah, you know, I think paired following one of two categories, which are they're overwhelmed with everything that's out there, where they're under-informed, right? Like there's just too much to know. And so a lot of times I think they—I think we all, not just parents, we all kind of figure it's easier to just not know more. Just kind of pretend like it's all fine. And I think what probably surprises most parents—so I travel for BART technologies and I speak, I give speeches to, you know, students, I give speeches to parents, I give speeches to educators and do their professional development. And probably the biggest shock factor is how much screen time our kids are consuming. There's just—the amount alone is insane. I just heard a statistic that the average kid spends about seven minutes outside in unsolicited play a day. Wow. Seven minutes. Oh, no. So when we read their screen time, we're looking at like eight, nine hours. And that is insane. I mean, that's unlike any other generation ever in the history of the world. So that is probably the most shocking thing of how much kids are online. I do the second most shocking thing for families that we don't realize is how much mature adult content they are consuming when having a half-developed brain. We look at the content and we're like, well, yeah, that makes sense because we're at that level. We're at that brain level. We're at that understanding, that maturity level. But our kids are not. And so they're seeing the same material we are. And it's pretty overwhelming and it's really kind of alarming how much of that is giving some of the tiny little brains and the tiny little bodies. And then we expect them to function typically. You know what I mean? Absolutely. Absolutely. I can't even imagine what it must be like for them. I really can't. Yeah. I mean, when you have to develop a brain of consuming mature adult material, it's no wonder why our kids are reporting that they are more anxious, more stressed, more overwhelmed, more depressed than any other previous generation with like the least amount of like responsibilities, the least amount of expectations, the least amount of hurdles, the lowest resiliency rate. So it's wild to think that they have all this extra stress, anxious, and depression without all these other things that we typically point to that built our resiliency, but really it's got to be that mature adult material they're consuming at record amount of time. Absolutely. Absolutely. Well, they're regulating their emotions through this technology that they can't possibly understand at all. But now it's almost like everybody, kids, adults, we're all turning into this. We kind of scroll when we're stressed. We've been shows more overwhelmed. We text people when we're anxious. And it's like every bit of emotional regulation is revolving around the phone, their apps, things like that. And it's like they're not seeking any outside re-regulation skills from walking outside for a bit or anything. And that's really scary. Those statistics are, whoa. It's wild when one of the most Googled phrases in the internet is, how do I release stress? And you're like, well, you're helping the internet what to do, which is wild, right? Because really we're struggling and then we're going to the internet for answers. And then we're staying on the internet longer. And the sad thing is the answers are outside. The answers are community, are being present with people around us. Like it's all these other things that aren't the internet that are the answers. And yet we're not going to those people. We're not going to our mentors, our coaches. We're going to Google. We're going to chat to PT. And we're asking those questions. So it is really weird and insular and in those ways. Absolutely. And just to even figure that out for anyone would be complex, but for middle schoolers, the emotional stakes are often so much higher because all that peer interaction is happening around them constantly and publicly. And it's like, I think that it's especially true for neurodivergent kids and kids with ADHD and autistic kids and so on and kids that struggle with emotional regulation or social overload. So I mean, how does the speed and intensity of digital communication impact a child's ability to regulate emotions in real time? Well, speed is what we're realizing is the kind of the crazy, right? I grew up in a damn age of like TV. You know, I share the same birth year as MTV, which apparently doesn't really exist in the way I was growing up either. It was a bummer. But I know, I know. But the reality was like, we heard TV's gonna rock your brain. And what we realized was that it wasn't great, but also most of the things I watched had a beginning, middle and end. But I've not seen the end of Instagram yet or the end of TikTok or the end of Snapchat, right? Like this idea of long form versus short form media is a really interesting conversation that everyone's having in the technical space right now, because I think that short form media just feeds the idea that consumption needs to happen and that more and more and more and more is the answer. So our kids are consuming so much more because everything is 17 seconds, 20 seconds, 10 seconds, and they're just flipping from one thing to the next. And all that's doing is not only shrinking their attention span, but it's actually flooding their brain with so much content, so many thoughts, so many different things to think about for their brain to travel and use that it's really overwhelming and kind of short circuiting their systems. So where now, we want them to watch 30 minutes of law and order and it's boring. I don't get it. What's going on? But what we're finding is that plots are missing and they're important. Stories that have a beginning, middle and end are important. And yet our kids are like filling in the blank and they're just jumping with this short form content. So the amount that they're consuming and the fast pace at which they're consuming is wild. There's a great book called The Dopamine Nation and in it, the author, she talks about how our kids are pressing this dopamine button too hard, too long, and too quickly. And the problem with that is that for every dopamine rush we get, there's a kind of a drop-off period, right? There's that coming down on that dopamine high. And if we're pressing it for too much, too hard, too long, too fast, then that drop-off gets larger and larger and larger. So now our kids really are having that depression and that drop-off because all we want in that quick dopamine takes of flipping through 30 stories on Instagram or sending an inappropriate picture on Snapchat that makes that dopamine rush happen instead of actually finding ways like a 30-second hug with your family. Going outside in the sunlight, doing things that also will give you that, but it doesn't have a drop-off that technology does. So we really see this like the amount and the fastness of the quickness that they're consuming this is really causing these drop-offs to be huge. I ask parents all the time, your kids gaming on a Saturday for six hours. When they come out of their bedroom, is the next thing out of their mount positive or negative? Yeah. It's always going to be negative because their brain is dropping off that high that they got for six hours straight. So it's always going to be grump. It's always going to be negative. It's never going to be like, oh, mother, dinner smells amazing. So we really have to be careful with the speed at which our kids are consuming this content. Absolutely. Well, and then you get your sleep disruption and all that anxiety and impulse posting, comparison, and emotional exhaustion, social conflict that carries back to school. And then the teachers deal with it. What happens digitally often doesn't really stay digitally anymore. So I mean, how are you seeing digital stress impact kids socially and educationally right now? Yeah, we're seeing it happen. I mean, I would say the average admin at a school spends about 70 to 80% of their time dealing with problems that don't happen on their campus. And so that's pretty wild. We're not seeing that in-person conflict. We're seeing this digital conflict that's moving to online. We're also seeing kids experience this idea of masking more. What I mean by that is it's super normal for middle schoolers to find out who they are. They don't know their feet are too big. They're tripping on everything. They're unsure. They're awkward. We all have that faith. And I thought I was a cowboy for a week and wear a cowboy clothes and then I realized I'm not. I thought I was a job. I tried that. And it's really socially appropriate for kids to try different groups to see where they fit. The difference is these kids are doing it digitally where there is evidence forever there. So they're trying these masks on by like being a grading, you know, a straight-in student on a roll. And then they get online and send these direct messages or these group chat messages that are super inappropriate, are very aggressive, are violent, or are sexually motivated. And people are looking at these going, this isn't the kid I know. Like, who is this child? And so again, it's that masking, but it's causing these issues that you can't really come back from. Like, there's not photos of me during my cowboy phase. There's not evidence that's going to ruin my future. But if a kid says something they shouldn't say, especially if it's sexually explicit, like that could ruin their chances of going to a school they want to go to or getting a job. There's federal laws that it can break. So we really have to be careful because socially these kids aren't sure how to respond. And if they're unsure, they're also not really going to adults. We talk about how kids aren't looking for trusted adults anymore. Kids are looking for available adults. Right. You guess who's available for your kid? Strangers on the internet. Right? They're always available for your kid when you're not. Not only that, but now these companion bots are available for your kid. So we see kids going to like these innocent companion bots and saying like, Hey, how do I know if a girl likes me? Hey, how do I know that he was flirting or not? Or what is it me when they say that? And they're after these innocent questions. The problem is that technology is just going to regurgitate garbage back to them of things from the internet. Right? So it's not really helpful. And kids don't really know that. That these aren't feelings. These are just statements that companion bots stating. And in a few situations through things like, you know, hallucinations or all sorts of weird stuff, AI has actually recorded here really harmful information back to kids. And so it's actually encouraged kids to hurt themselves. And we've seen that issue happen a couple of times. That's scary. So socially, our kids are wanting to figure it out, but they're going to these other places like their peers or the internet or companion bots to find the validation, to find these social skills. And they're just not there. They're not going to be at those places. Right? They're going to be in places where you've got to sit at a table for lunch with people you may not like. And then how do you deal with that interpersonal? But now if kids have devices on their campuses, one-to-one devices or their own tech, then they don't have to worry about sitting on a table with people they don't like. They can just get on their devices. So we're really robbing our kids in this like social conflict resolution. All these soft skills that we really want them to have, they're not getting a chance to practice and work through at the age they're supposed to. Absolutely. Absolutely. We are. And it's up to us to come up with a solution. And one thing I really appreciated learning more about the BART company is that the focus on helping families build safety, but also gradually building independence in real world digital skills over time is of great importance. And honestly, I thought that it was really smart developmentally because middle schoolers don't really magically wake up one day with adult level impulse control clearly or judgment for what they choose online. Those skills have to be taught and practiced and scaffolded and then repeated as much as possible. So can you tell us a little bit more about how BART approaches helping families create digital safety plans that still preserve trust, connection and growing independence? And this is the magic part of what BART can do. So I don't want to steal your thunder. So please tell us how BART is changing that narrative. Totally. I mean, we, the internet and devices is the only world where we are not scaffolding kids and it's crazy to me. You know, growing up, if you were, I was, I keep always heard the story about me being a toddler and grabbing cookies and then disappearing into the room and then coming back for more cookies and my parents were like, what are they doing with all these cookies? And they finally followed me and I was like shoving them in the furnace. You know, I mean, like, I could not be alone in another room, let alone anywhere else. And then you can go play out back and then you might earn playing in the front yard and then you might earn being able to walk the block and then you earn going to, you know, writing your bike in other places. So you earned all this before you got your driver's license and can drive away. But with devices, we've not necessarily kind of done that. We just, you know, let our kids use our phones and the dough. And then when we're tired of that, we give them their own device where we get them an iPad and we pretend like that's not a phone, even though it's just a giant phone. Right. So something that BART, we really care about is we realize that we could create technology like the BART phone, the BART watch, where we can make them as dumb or as smart as families want. So that way we could actually create a phone that calls and texts four people and that's it. And then once you can use that appropriately and healthily, then we can roll that up and you can either have more contacts or we can add a couple apps. And then when someone messes up, because of course they will, they have a half-tonne of brain, we can roll that back to those four people again. And that's good because grandma missed you and she wants to talk to you again. So you can actually do this like practice. How do you become a good digital citizen? How do you use technology? Well, we also provide things like a technology contract where families can sit around and kind of negotiate what are the tech norms for our family? What do we believe? What do we want? And then it's the tech contract that guides those discussions. Not, we don't do it for a place of anger and emotion. We do it from like a negotiation and like what do we want? What's best for all of us? One of the things is we're not spyware. We're not going to give adult access to every single thing that happens on the device because we do think that kids need to learn how to grow. If my parents heard everything I said in junior high, they'd be buried in the house. You know what I mean? It's not great. We want kids to have a little bit of that freedom, but we also want any worrisome content and that's like 29 different indicators that we looked for at VARC. Then we're going to alert the parents that like, hey, this happened on your kids' advice. This is the content of how it happened and why it happened. And here's like some resources. So like we will tell the parent like this is technically age appropriate, but you should still use this type of prompts to talk to your kid about it because it can become worrisome later on. And so that way we're kind of putting the parent back in the driver's seat. We're also giving suggestions about what experts are saying, what we're seeing that showing because we also understand that sometimes we have to keep things in context. We don't want our kids to ever swear. You know what I mean? Right. And yet it's pretty age appropriate to figure out swears. Yeah. And it's appropriate and we use it. And so we want parents to be able to engage in that conversation with the child, not gotcha on all of our devices. Our devices look like typical devices. So our phone is a Samsung Galaxy phone. And so it looks like a typical phone. We do have two bark apps on there that live on the device, but it gives the kid a little anonymity so that they don't feel like they're walking around with some weird looking brick phone that nobody else has. But also we don't hide it from the kid either. We want that discussion to be right up front. This is for your safety. My parents loved that. They thought it had a car with rubber all around the sides of it because it didn't warn everybody else I'm a new driver and it would have been for my safety to provide guardrails. Yeah. I'll tell you first and foremost, we believe in delay in delay. We as a company would love a kid's got devices older. I don't know that we believe everyone should get a device. However, more and more parents believe their kids need one. And if that's the case, that's fine. We just want them to have a safe option that isn't open to the worldwide web. The number one question I get asked is, what age should I give my kid a device? And I tell them all kinds of, it's not an age. Can your kid, I'll know the dishwasher without being asked. Can they make their own bed? Do they have the maturity to handle a device? And if they don't, and maybe a device, maybe the smart watch is where we start, right? Or you want to do a device that's got location tracking, then we do the four emergency contacts that they can contact. And we don't allow it to have other Wi-Fi features. So that's the nice thing of having those guardrails that can either ramp up with the kid as they grow and learn, or can ramp back down whenever something happens that isn't great. That way we're not taking the device, giving the device, taking the device, giving the device. That's exhausting. Nobody wants to go through that. That's wonderful. That's something that I thought was truly innovative is that it's, you know, the family have a good conversation, a quality conversation about their family's use of technology, and you all come up with a contract together. And I think that that is something that's a great first step where a lot of people don't even have the wherewithal or the options to do such a thing. So it's great that you provide that for them so they have the peace of mind and the prompts that they can use to start that conversation. So it's really, really innovative. But we also have to talk about AI and deep fakes because, I mean, yikes. Honestly, I think we're only beginning to comprehend how disruptive these technologies may become socially and emotionally for adolescents. It actually scares me. So we've been seeing all this impersonation and fake images, manipulated content, cyberbullying and emotionally impulsive behavior and happening faster. But it's just, it's like happening faster and faster and faster. It's like, I can't even keep up. Sometimes I don't even know what's real or not myself. And one thing I found especially interesting in your materials was that the idea that AI can create a false sense of emotional safety or trust for kids who may not yet have the developmental skills to recognize that manipulation online. And you were talking about like the chatbots and things like that. So what concerns you most right now about where AI and deep fake technology are heading for for kids and families? You know, I will be honest, for me, the biggest fear and the biggest thing I'm struggling with is our inability to talk about it. If we got in front of AI and have these conversations with our kids about, hey, this is going to seem friendly. This is going to seem like this. They're going to have these types of questions. Here's what you need to be careful about. Here's the questions you need to ask, like who created this? Why did they create it? Are they trying to sell me? Are they trying to collect my data, my information? If we could have taught them well, then I think we would be less afraid. But unfortunately, we're kind of a reactive culture where we wait for there to be a problem and then we go, oh, there's a problem. What are we going to do about it? So for me, I talk to educators all the time and they're like, AI is the worst. We got to get rid of AI. I'm like, listen, I'm perfectly aware and I'm, I hear more than most people the problems in the downfalls with things of AI. But AI is just a tool. It can build things up and it can tear things down. What I started teaching, I taught with an overhead projector and I had to write on it every day. So when we got computers and kids got to use, go to the computer lab, we were freaking out as teachers because now they have Google and they can cheat, look up the answers. So we had to teach kids how to use Google correctly. I think we've gotten to the same with AI. It can be a thought partner. It can be certain things, but if we're not telling the kids anything and we're keeping our mouth shut, they're going to use it for whatever the heck they think they want to use it for, or they're going to have to be in at what they can use it for, or their peers what they can use it for. And none of that will be good advice. Right? So we want to add our voices in this conversation. If we love kids, if we, our parents, if we care about them, we need to start engaging with our kids saying, have you ever used AI? What kind of AI have you used? Can we also have a family and look it up together and look at the pros and cons and discuss how you're using it and why you're using it? And, you know, because the reality is we've got people, like always, and kids included who are using deep fakes for nefarious reasons. They're protecting somebody else. They're sex-dorting their fellow students for money. They're going to jail because of it. They're putting teachers' faces on other people's bodies and making these things that they think are funny, but actually have a lot of bigger implications about doing some of their identity and what does that mean? And that's a federal crime. And so what does that mean? So they're thinking about these because, again, they have to have a brain. But if we're not entering our voice, putting our voice in this conversation, then we're kind of just as guilty because we're letting them figure it out and that's not great either. So me, we need to have those conversations about, like, hey, if you ever see a video of a student you know, then something seems off. Maybe the values it's talking about are the values you know that kid to have. Or maybe there's like a weird blur on the screen or something they're using, language they don't normally use. Like, these are all critical things they can look at and go, that's probably not them. That's probably fake. And we probably need to report that. Or at least reach out to that kid and say, did you know this was this? Because we are finding more and the units trying to be used to separate us. The units trying to be used to like implicate us or harm us, that we should be actually coming together in the real world and having each other's backs. It should be making us become more communal. And we're like, did you see this thing online about so-and-so policies? Oh, we should be talking about that. Because I think once we start implementing those critical reasoning skills, we can start going, it's not great. Being manipulated online doesn't feel good to anyone. And so telling kids cannot do it isn't the answer. Showing them how they're being manipulated to use it, that's a way better approach. And that's going to help kids see that, you know, they're not, they are the victims. They're not necessarily in charge like they see they are when they use these things with AI. Yeah. Well, and kids want to know this too. I mean, I was talking to my niece and nephew and they're of that age and, you know, looking at phones and things. And they had those questions for me. They were like, Ansu's, you know, what's safe? How do I know about this stuff? And they, like you said, they have to develop a brain. And they want to have that learning experience to become, you know, have that ownership of their own internet safety and to understand why and so on. So it really opens up that conversation really nicely. And I love that about Barks. So would you mind to tell our listeners a bit about, okay, so you talked about that you have phones available. You also have the watches and app and so on. So can you let people know how they might want to get started with you all and to find out more information? Totally. You can go to bark.us and that's going to have our full kind of product line. But I'm a part of a community called the Connected Communities Program. And that's where I'm going into like sports and fit grid classes around the country. And really doing like dare but protect. Talking to kids about how to empower themselves online. You can also go through those pages. If you click on the hamburger, little three lines, you can find where we talk about Barks community partners. And then you can go there and find our Connected Communities page. You can also, should be an email, adamb.bark.us. Super easy, adamb. At bark.us. And I'm happy to answer any questions. Like parents are like, how do I, you know, these are the devices we have in my house. This is what I want to do to keep my kids safe. I'm happy to share ways you can do that. I'm happy to share ways that are free you've got. And then ways that if you need us, what we can offer, but what other people can offer too. I'm a big fan of letting parents, giving them all the information and letting parents decide what's best for their family. I never want to assume that everyone is one size fits all because, you know, we're all, we have different concerns and different issues and different priorities. So, you know, I'm also happy to answer any of those at any time. I'm going to have a code when we're all done that any parents can use if they want to try out any of our products. I'll give you a little bit of discount and you guys can check it out. And if you're happy with them, great. If you're not, you can return them and we can talk about why that was and, you know, ways we can always make things better. It's a wild world with that. There's a lot of, a lot of moving parts out there. So happy to do that as well. I don't have the code with me right now, but I will definitely get that for your listeners. Awesome. Thank you so, so much. And, you know, part of my vetting process, of course, is affordability as a teacher. You know, I've got five bucks to do 200 science experiments with each kid. So, you know, I, to me, it's about families and affordability right now, obviously right now. And after putting gas in my car today, yes. So the affordability fact, yeah, the affordability factor is there. And I really appreciate that you guys consider that for families as well. Yeah. And that's why I'm happy to help answer questions because we've been around for 10 years. We serve about 7.5 million families across the country. So just our resources alone are huge and helpful. We've got a huge parenting group that we get to be a part of on Facebook that can be helpful for families just to ask questions. Like we want to provide resources. It's not all about, you know, you've got to use this. It's about, hey, here's options and you decide what sets for you. We have a lot of people who love our products. But again, I never want to make those assumptions. We were like, tie magazines, that's new invention a few years back. We were on the Dairy More Show. We had a ton of success. We keep growing on that. But again, that's personal. The digital world is personal for our family value. So happy to, you know, field any of those questions for anybody out there. That's so awesome. And let's see, this is what I'm saying. This is one of the reasons why I was like, folks need to know about this. So one thing I really appreciate it. Hi, Steve, he agrees. One thing I really appreciate about this conversation is that it's not the least bit anti-kid and it's not anti-technology. And it's about helping kids build resilience, awareness, emotional safety and healthy independence and growing up in this really quickly evolving space that we're looking into now. And honestly, I think many families are simply just trying to stay emotionally connected enough to notice when something underneath the surface is not working out well for them. And I think that awareness factor to me is so important. And you can spark really quality conversations about technology in your home and have like a fire plant, you have a technology plant. It's just what you do as a family. So but Adam, I want to thank you so much for being here today and for the work that you're doing. Really appreciate you taking the time, sir. Yeah, thank you so much. I appreciate you having me on. I love this kind of stuff. And I'm always happy to help and be on as many times as you need. So definitely love it. Love it. Can't wait for that. That's awesome. You really just hit it out of the park. So and to my families, teachers, counselors, middle school folk listening, you're not failing because this feels difficult. OK, that's not the case. We need to change the narrative. Bust the cognitive distortion, but the human nervous systems, you know, they're not designed for constant social interaction 24 seven. Kids need our support. They deserve it. And families deserve guidance as well. And you deserve that. But conversations about technology should include emotional safety, trust, skill development and connection, not just fear and oh, my gosh, what's going to happen? Things so hopefully this will help to guide those conversations for you and take care of yourselves this week, everybody. And as always, stay clever, little foxes. Take it easy.