discipline is a lifestyle

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So like me putting all of this together, I am the production, okay, because I film in a space in my home. And so chat is my best friend. Google is my best friend. YouTube tutorials are my best friend. But like I genuinely, when it comes to equipment and things that I need, I am barely equipped for this, but somehow we get by and it ends up looking like this. And I'm like, praise God. Like this is actually just the favor of Jesus. So I also got like a monitor so I can actually see myself. So if I'm looking off, it's because I'm still checking to make sure everything's in focus. Like it looks good. I'm kind of geeking out. I'm freaking out. Okay. Anyway, what a great day. What a beautiful day. Guys, I am so excited for today. And I think today's episode is going to be another episode where it's giving like no pressure. And again, it's not that I think you guys in particular, like put pressure on me, I think it's myself. I think I put pressure on me. And I think that as things grow and as the podcast grows as the platform of Christ with coffee and ice grows. And even like my other platforms, if I'm being honest, like even as my socials grow, it is such a blessing and it is so cool and it's so amazing. But I find myself getting into these traps, like these mental ruts of like putting so much pressure on myself because I know that there are more eyes watching me. And sometimes I think back to the days where I was like a micro micro influencer. And the pressure was like, girl, I mean, I was just getting a couple thousand views. So it wasn't anything like it is today. But I'm not complaining. I'm grateful. But that's just me being honest is sometimes because of that, I like, I let pressure and kind of like performance dictate my brain. When honestly, I just want to like hang, I just want to show up and I want to hang out with you guys. And so that's what I'd love to do with you today. And God didn't call me to be like a pastor. And sometimes I feel like I put pressure on myself that I'm supposed to show up on this podcast and like give this striking, amazing, like God breathed word as if I'm pastoring a church. And it's just like he didn't actually call me to be a pastor, but he did tell me to start podcast called Christ with coffee and ice. And so that's what we're doing today. I'd also love to just chat with you guys about life like friends and just be honest. I love for this episode to have transparency, vulnerability, rawness, like everything that's in the description of what we have as the podcast. When you look up the description of it, it's like expect vulnerability, rawness. Like that's what I want today's episode to be. Not that that's not what we do here, but like I'm really feeling it extra today. So let's just chat. Let's talk. Let's hang out. Let's talk about Jesus. Let's talk about life. I'd love to even share with you guys like recent lessons that I've been walking through. And like deeper revelations that I feel like God has been walking me through. Really fun goals that I've set for myself that maybe could hopefully also inspire you guys. New exciting things like also obviously I got a new lens for my camera, but I also got a new Bible, which is okay. I never need a new Bible. You have one Bible and that's all you need. You don't need to have so many Bibles. At this point I have enough Bibles where I could fill every room in my home, which is actually beautiful and also no excuse for me to never be in the word. So I probably have a total of maybe five Bibles now. Some of them are different translations, but a big reason is because Hosanna revival. I'll never stop talking about them because they're just the best. They literally don't pay me to say this, but they do give me beautiful Bibles. The most beautiful, but look at how gorgeous she is. I thought she was cream, but now that I'm even seeing it in this light, it looks like it's actually like a really pretty pastel yellow. And it says the Holy Bible on the neck of it. And then on the back it says, may all who search for you be filled with joy and goodness in you, which is Psalm 40, 16. I love God so much. What in the world would we do without him? It's ridiculous. Okay. So anyway, that's my beautiful new Bible from Hosanna revival. Thank you, Hosanna revival. I also do have a code with them. So if you guys would ever like to shop with them, it's just my first and last name. It's Ali Oste. If you're ever on the hunt for a new Bible or they even have a really cute note-taking, journaling. They even have daily planners, I believe. But this is a really look at how stuck I'm freaking out. Look at how stunning this journal is. If you already have a journal, you don't need a new one. It's okay. I'm not trying to push consumerism, but also how gorgeous is this for when you need a new journal girl, if you're not done with yours, fill it up first and then get a new one. This one is so gorgeous. And also I like love. Do you see that? How the sides of it is gold. Okay. It's beautiful. And on the back of it, it does have another scripture. It says, for from him and through him and to him are all things to him. Be the glory forever, amen, which is Romans 1136. I just started using it this morning. Sorry. I'm going to make more eye contact with the camera. Half of the first page and the rest, I still have to fill it with notes. And I think this journal in particular, I'm going to dedicate to note-taking when I read the Bible. And by other journals, I've honestly treated it as like my thoughts, journals, where I'm just praying or dreaming with the Lord or just like venting to Jesus. So those kind of journals are fun. But I think this journal specifically, I'm going to put towards like what I'm learning through scripture. And so also something that's really exciting that I've decided to do, which I hope it would inspire you guys, is I have never read the Bible from cover to cover. I have bounced around the Bible a lot and I have especially bounced around the most in the New Testament. The Old Testament has always been very intimidating to me. I really have not read many books from the Old Testament other than like Genesis or Ruth I read. I've read Esther. I've read a little bit of Job. I've read Psalms, Proverbs. Please yeosties, probably. That's it. Everything else. I'm like, nope. I've never read Habakkukh. Please, Ali. I've never read Jonah. Wait, yes I have. I've never read Joel. I've never read Daniel. Anyway, there's so much in the Old Testament that I haven't even tried to touch. And so I've decided that I want to read the Bible through and through. And I'm not necessarily following a Bible plan, which I don't know if that's smart or not, but I kind of just want to take this at the pace that feels natural for me. I think if I were to put any like restrictions on myself of like, okay, you have to read the entire Bible in three months, I don't know how much I'd actually be retaining. Because I think I would probably be focusing more so on, okay, I'd better read 10 chapters today because that's my goal to make sure that I actually finished the Bible in three months, but then like, am I really retaining it? And so I guess I want to find a good balance of not taking years to read the entire Bible, but also not like making sure that I'm not missing too much. Obviously, I'm probably not going to grasp everything. We're going to be reading this cover to cover a million times. And so I'm also not putting pressure on myself that I have to under like fully grasp every single thing, but I do want to get as much out of it as I can and what feels like natural and feels like, yeah, like a natural pace for me to be reading the Bible. And so I do have a goal of reading it in six months. I think I'd like to try to read the entire Bible cover to cover in six months, but if it takes like eight months because I'm going a little slower and I'm being a bit more intentional with it and I'm having to like look up a lot of stuff, that's the other thing is like when I don't understand something I'm reading, a lot of times when I read the Bible, I would just be like, that's okay. I'm just going to keep reading until it starts to make sense, which isn't awful because I'm definitely still retaining things. I'm approaching this with a lot more patience where I'm like, no, if I don't understand what this means or if a genuine question pops into my head where I'm like, hmm, okay, what like an example was I was reading in Genesis 15 this morning and a genuine question that I had that popped into my head was at the end of Genesis 15. So this is the beginning of the story of Abraham and at the time his name was only Abraham until God changed his name to Abraham. Anyway, Abraham had presented a bunch of offerings of animals to the Lord as sacrifices so in this tradition he cut each animal down the middle and laid the haves side by side. He did not however cut the birds in half. Okay, so anyway, I was kind of wondering like what, because a lot of the things that we need to remember to about the Bible is it's very old, that does not mean that what's written in it is irrelevant but that does mean that there's a lot of things that are in here that were like culturally normal, acceptable at that time. That like today I'm like, what does that mean? But at that time it was like very significant to culture. And so I first questioned that and then another, another thing I questioned was so then Abraham after that he fell into a deep sleep and God had then given him a prophetic dream. He spoke to Abraham in his sleep and what God is telling Abraham while he's asleep is just the fate in the future and the promise of the generations to come after Abraham and that he will be a father to the nations. And so then after that, after the sun went down and darkness fell, Abraham saw a smoking fire pot and a flaming torch passed between the haves of the carcasses. And I was like, okay, and honestly there probably was a version of Ali that would have been like, yeah, I don't understand that I'm just going to keep reading. But I was like, no, what does that actually mean? And so I started researching, I'm reading the Bible and I'm like, what is this part? Like what does it mean that Abraham saw a smoking fire pot and a flaming torch passed between the haves of the carcasses? And apparently that was, but like it was giving that it was supposed to be a very like pivotal piece of information, but at the same time I just didn't know what it meant. And so what I learned after I did research on it was that when Abraham was sleeping and woke up to see this, at that time, this was an ancient symbolic act, especially in the ancient near east called covenant cutting. Parties would cut the animal in half and lay the pieces opposite to each other, walking between them symbolizing that if either party broke the covenant, they'd accept the same fate as the animal. But only God alone took the responsibility for fulfilling the covenant. Regardless of Abraham's actions, this was a powerful sign of divine commitment. And so that just helped me understand how beautiful that moment actually was between Abraham and God and just kind of like put it more into perspective of just the kindness of the Lord and how loyal he is to us and how committed he is to us and that he didn't put any of the responsibility of the fate of Abraham's descendants and his future on Abraham. And God was like, no, it's like fully on me and I will fulfill my promise. I have made this covenant with you. I have not made a lie. Like what I've promised you is true and I will make sure that it happens. And I'm actually the only one that's held responsible for that. You don't have to like hold your part to make sure that that happens for your life. Like I'm the one who makes sure that that happens for your life as long as you follow me and obey me. And so I again, like I wouldn't have known that that was actually a ancient symbolic act. I mean, I assumed because I'm like, no one's really doing that today. We just kind of pinky promise each other or sign contracts, I guess, you know. But at the time, I guess they did something called covenant cutting. And so this and it also feels like probably one of the most intense forms of commitment considering like when two parties, like two people are making a covenant like this, like making a promise to each other. It says that they are literally accepting the fate of the animal if one were to break it, which means right. So anyway, just an example of how important it is for us to be curious while also reading the Bible. And I think that that is what's going to take us to another level of maturity, another level of just growth in our biblical knowledge. And so that's the journey that I'm on. And I'm really excited about it because I think this is a desire that I've always had is to not only read the Bible, like cover to cover, but to really care about the details. And yeah, so I'm excited about that. And I would also encourage you guys to do the same thing. You are fully capable. Of course, like joining Bible studies and getting around people and I've done plenty of those in there awesome. It is really helpful to read the Bible with others. And to hear how the Holy Spirit is ministering to other people in the room in other ways, you know, and I think it's fun because you start to kind of put the puzzle pieces together. But if you are in a situation where you're studying it alone, like I was this morning, I would encourage you to do it the same way and just utilize other sources and do research and be curious. And if you're lacking curiosity, I think for me, like I genuinely, that was a huge prayer that I was praying to the Lord for months now is I actually was like losing desire to really like dive into the Bible and to care about the details, you know. And I felt convicted about that because by me rejecting the details of the Bible was me telling God that it didn't matter enough to me or it wasn't important enough to me, which is him. Like this is literally God. It's a part of his heart. It's what he's left for us. And so I, yeah, I just don't, I don't want to treat it like it's a casual thing. I don't want to treat the Bible like it's not worth being starving for and thirsty for and hungry for it. Like I don't want to be more hungry for other things than the Word of God. And I have been like, I've genuinely, I've cared more about other things than the Word of God. Gas groceries eating out even on the tightest budget. There's no escaping them, but here's what you can control. Getting cash back every single time you fill up hit the grocery store or go out to eat with the upside app. The free upside app gets you cash back on gas groceries and dining. The three things draining your wallet right now, I can bet because it's draining mine. And here's how it works. You open the app, claim and offer, pay with your card like normal and get paid. There's over 100,000 participating locations, which means once you start checking the app, you realize how often there's an offer right where you're already going. And to be honest, when I started using the upside app, I was a little sus on it because I don't know. These things can feel a little gimmicky or I don't know. I'm like, how much does this saving actually really go? 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Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code coffee to get up to $300 off today. Air doctor comes with a 30 day money back guarantee plus a three year warranty which is an $84 value for free. Get this exclusive podcast only offer now at airdoctorpro.com that's a-i-r-d-o-c-t-o-r-p-r-o.com using promo code coffee. I think I've also been guilty of like going to the Bible to just kind of get like my moment of like validation or my moment of okay god hears me he sees me okay cool I'm done. And as much as god has absolutely met me there and he has so much compassion and grace and love for those moments I felt convicted where I was like why do I not also have a heart to just read the Bible and be thirsty for gods wisdom. And I think another way of like if you really want to understand god more if you really want to understand his heart more if you want to understand his character more if you want a fresh revelation of who he is because we all know that he's faithful we all know that he's kind we all know that he's everlasting we all know that he has new mercies for us every morning and he's gracious right we all know these things but we can still know those things and there's still opportunity to have a deeper revelation of what that means. And so the way to have a deeper revelation of what those things mean of who god is is by reading the Bible and having a hunger for it. And so I think step one for me was like admitting to god that I lacked that hunger. And again we've said this on the podcast so many times where we've been like the Lord already knows what's in your heart. Yard he knows what's in your mind. Yard he knows what you're struggling with. Yard he knows the things that you're not willing to admit to yourself or him. And so you might as well just say it and you might as well just tell him and be honest no matter how brutal it feels no matter how like low key blasphemous it feels like in a way there was a part of me that was like this feels so blasphemous Lord that I'm actually telling you that there's a part of my heart that does not care enough about what you've left me here. And I hate that and so Lord I'm asking for you to give me the hunger like I need it. Give me the desire. Give me the discipline. Give me the patience. That's a prayer that I've had to pray more than once. And it's really cool too because I'm excited to be able to share more with you guys as the Lord continues to walk me through this season. I just feel like he's walking me through an entire like he's like next levels out you know. And I believe that he has that for all of his children is like once he's got us on one level he's like great next level like there is no like okay God now we're coasting. I was talking to a friend the other day it was after we were we were at church and there's a sweet girl that came up to me and gave me a prophetic word which I so desperately needed and it was really really simple. I mean it was truly so simple it was along the lines of like God hears you he's with you he knows he understands he knows you're scared but it's okay he's with you so simple but like it's exactly what I needed in that moment. And the hesitation in my heart was like God I just knew that the Lord wanted to take me somewhere new. Just in my relationship with him in this journey that he has me on called life as he has us all on our own journeys in life but like I just knew that God was like yep Al we're going up now we're going to continue to go up like these stairs and he's like next level babe. I'm like ah and I'm telling my friend I'm like I have felt that God is trying to take me somewhere else and I've been very content with where I'm at. I've worked very hard to be where I'm at and I look back at a version of myself even you know a year ago and I'm like God we've come really far and I really love who I've become and I can't believe that used to be me. Thank God but I kind of want a coast here for a little bit and they're just like that doesn't exist in the kingdom. That does not exist in the kingdom. It's beautiful it's a joy it's an honor like it's genuinely an honor but it is dying to your flesh every day by saying okay God let's go to the next level. So I'm telling my friend I'm like I don't want to I'm so comfortable where I'm at I'm like barely comfortable with the amount of eyes that are on me right now don't want anymore I'm good God we don't need to go any further. I'm good where I'm at like I'm content it's great I'm healthy like I'm the healthiest I've ever been spiritually physically emotionally but that doesn't mean that there still is an opportunity to grow more with God and that doesn't mean that he's done with you yet because God isn't done with us until we take our last breath here on earth he's not done he's not done with you yet he's not done with your life and so whether you feel content or not too bad he's gonna keep taking you further he's gonna keep taking you up he's gonna say keep coming we gotta keep coming come on girl I think another thing that's played hand in hand with like me finally locking in like really having that hunger to know more of the Bible and trust me I just know there's gonna be days to come where I'm gonna be like I don't want to pick up my Bible I know it like there's no way that over the span in the next six months as I'm trying to read the entire Bible from cover to cover there isn't gonna be at least one day should be more than that but at least one day where I'm gonna be like I don't want to I'm tired I'm tired God I don't want to read I want to keep sleeping I don't want to wake up earlier to make sure that I can get in the word guys I woke up this morning at 5 30 in the morning to make sure that I had time to read the word ill if anyone tells you that they enjoy waking up at 5 30 in the morning I would question their sanity or they're just in a really healthy place and they're like no I love it and they're a morning person I love that that's not me yet but I said God you are worth it and there've been a lot of times that I've woken up and I've told God that he wasn't but this time I was like you are and I'm tired of of feeling like I'm not capable of these things you know because it says in your word that we can do all things through Christ I used to be somebody who would stay in bed until like 2 p.m. and I just feel God being like this is who I've called you to be Ali and so I woke up at 5 30 this morning and it sucked it's sucked the sun wasn't even up yet but also Proverbs 31 I think it literally says that homegirls up before the sun yeah so that's what I did this morning I got up at 5 30 and I said okay God because I also I've started this new journey you guys know this if you've already been listening to the podcast if you're new here hi welcome I'm Ali and we cry and we get emotional a lot on this podcast in real life I also have communion with me I would love like I am getting to this I really wanted us to take communion because it's been way too long since we've taken communion together that's ridiculous and secondly I do have my it's not coffee on ice it's actually poppy I have my poppy on ice in our cute little glass tumbler our CWC OI tumbler the reason why it's poppy is because I gave up coffee for lent I don't even really do lent but my friend Angela texted me and she's like what are you giving up for lent this year and I was like I've never done that should I be doing that she's like yeah it's 40 days I'm like okay and I was already cutting out coffee in that moment I had already cut off coffee for like three or four days and I was like I could just keep going and also that's a big sacrifice to me that's the point right you're not supposed to give up something that's like easy or like something you don't even really care about I'm pretty sure you're supposed to give up something that's like hard it's an actual sacrifice you know so I gave up my coffee guys so we have poppy on ice and I have the vintage cola flavor poppy is my everything like I'm I'm so excited for the day that a collaboration or a partnership can come out of this they send me poppy so that alone I'm like I'm not complaining thank you Jesus truly thank you Jesus it's such a blessing um but that'll be the coolest day is if somehow some way a partnership could come from it anyway also guys I just want to sorry we're all over the map I'm not going to forget it discipline and working out is what I was going to loop back to I do want to acknowledge like it's not an elephant in the room but it's definitely a change of the podcast over the last few months is ads like I'm like doing ad reads and I'm promoting companies that I support and believe in because of course I would not be supporting and advocating for brands that I didn't actually either personally use or believe in okay period blank there are plenty of ads that we turn down but um that is a new thing on this podcast and I want to thank you guys for like being so sweet and gracious and kind about that because I know that sometimes especially in this space like monetization especially like over monetization can look a little greedy and it can be greedy and so um it's been such a blessing to work with my network now so the podcast got signed with a network which is like a really cool big deal it's a really cool big deal with Lipson they're incredible people I love them they've been getting me the most insane opportunities like genuinely god I'm so grateful there was like a good amount of time where we were doing this podcast and we weren't making a penny off of it and so I was which I've stopped advertising for this because I'm like I don't want to be like asking you guys to but there was a time where I was like guys please donate to the podcast and tie because it's like the only thing that's keeping things rolling I've stopped asking you guys well I don't ask but I just offer it I'm like if you guys want it because you guys were asking that's the truth money's weird okay is this uncomfortable money's such a weird thing to talk about but it shouldn't be actually I rebuke that it shouldn't be it's the lords it's nothing to be uncomfortable about it's literally a resource of Jesus it's gods okay it's not weird but a lot of you guys at one point were like how do I give back like I literally want to tie and donate to your podcast and what you're doing Ali and so at the time like there wasn't a lot that was supporting the podcast financially and so I've stopped doing that but you guys oh my gosh I'll never forget how sweet and on tie the other ways tie to your church um to your local church or like donate to causes but none of that ever went unnoticed and it genuinely blessed me so much and it helped us get us to where we're at today we're signed with a network and um yeah it's been it's been amazing it's been incredible and so yeah there's ads that are playing now but yeah I think I still want to keep it open to you guys where it's like I've always communicated it with my network and my team that we will not be a podcast where there's an ad like every 10 minutes I don't want that especially it's hard to because we're talking about Jesus and so like I could literally be in the midst of like snot sobbing like we are moved by the Holy Spirit and then all of a sudden Ali's talking about her favorite mattress so it's tricky it's tricky and I've really been trying to be so discerning with the Lord about it that we don't overdo it but also it's such a blessing and I get to bless these incredible companies and like it's it's so fun to have relationships with like really awesome brands because yeah it's just fun thank you guys for being so sweet about it I really hope that you also like genuinely check out these brands that I do promote because I love them and they're great um okay sorry super sidetracked there but we will get back to what I was talking about which was that you guys know that I've been walking through this recent journey of fitness over the last few months of my life fitness has not been a lifestyle of mine for majority of my life and it is really ministered to me like I thought it was going to be about like my physique like feeling better looking better feeling more confident feeling more capable being able to open a pickle jar you know and it's more than just about opening a pickle jar now it's been teaching me discipline which like crazy thought that Ali's learning discipline at the age of 30 but discipline is biblical routine is biblical showing up again and again and again and again even when we don't want to is holy it's biblical it's righteous behavior whoa and so like it's so cool because having this routine where I am like dedicated to working out every Monday Wednesday and Friday with my trainer it is revealed parts of my flesh that are really really weak and I think like for so many years I've had a lot of freedom where I haven't had to have a ton of discipline I'm not saying that I'm not like willing to work I'm not a hard worker but like structure discipline routine not a part of my life a lot of my life was run by my feelings of like I'll do it when I feel like it and I'll make sure that I get it done like I'm going to get it done but I'm going to do it when I feel inspired to do it I'm going to do it when I want to do it and that is a place that God was like we're a little immature in this area Ali we need to crank it up a notch my girl I need to show you what real discipline is and so first step was working out discipline it has taught me not only in the consistency of showing up Monday Wednesday Friday of working out but also like in my workouts when I want to physically give up and I have to keep pushing because Lindsay standing there and she's going come on three more you're not done I know keep pushing what are you talking about keep pushing I don't have anything else in me but like it is that mental of like you have to keep going consistency push discipline I've never had that I never played a sport like if you've played a sport you probably already got it girl you probably already got it because there are so many times you've probably had to show up for practice and you didn't want to and your coach was pushing you and you're like shot up yeah I didn't have that I had way too much freedom oh what's fun about having a puppy is I get to drink this a lot quicker than my coffee because I would have been speaking out of at a rate you guys wouldn't have understood anymore so I do love the puppy because I can drink it a little quicker sorry I'm obsessed with this episode already this is like freeing for me I'm obsessed with this episode this is so fun how are you guys doing I love it because it feels like we're face timing and that's like my vibe if I'm ever showing up on the podcast and it doesn't feel like we're face timing anymore just let me know yeah discipline rocks so it's still a very new still a very new journey for me I'm not saying I'm the most disciplined person in the world but I feel God is calling me to be a disciplined individual he wants me to be a disciplined daughter and it might be because he's preparing me for seasons of my life that I don't even know what it looks like yet like he's like no I just just because I know what this next season has for you out and you're gonna need some discipline you can't be run by your emotions and your feelings anymore um and I think discipline comes from conviction to like I just feel God being like it's time Ali we're not gonna do that anymore you know you just know when God's calling you out of something and he's like yeah enough's enough that's where I am at and it's kind of scary at first because you can feel it coming you're like I don't want to get he's like enough is enough it's like it's dad it's dad it's not like Jesus bestie anymore it's like dad is like no more we're not doing that anymore Ali and it's the scripture that says God disciplines the word disciplines literally in the Bible the Lord only disciplines the ones whom he loves what scripture is that let's crack open my new gorgeous crisp Bible it's Hebrews it's freaking Hebrews guys Hebrews rocks oh my Bible so crisp oh it actually says it a few times in the Bible but we're first gonna read Hebrews 12 6 it's very simple it's very straight to the point and us children shouldn't argue with it because it's pretty clear my child don't make light of the Lord's discipline and don't give up when he corrects you for the Lord disciplines those he loves and he punishes each one he accepts as his child so we actually have to accept and be okay with and low key kind of rejoice in God's discipline and punishment and he punishes each one he accepts as his child he disciplines the ones he loves why should we rejoice in that because it means he loves us and it's for our good it's to better us it's to grow us it's to prune us it's to refine us where does refining happen purifying if you're going to purify I should say like gold or silver where do you do that in the fire ow yeah things don't get refined at a five star spa in a sauna full body massage facial scalp massage clay mask foot massage mani peti no refining doesn't happen in that atmosphere it happens in the fire where it burns and it hurts and it's hot um yeah so with that it's so uncomfortable and it sucks and it's convicting too like when God corrects you it's like ow but it's for our good and so that's why we should rejoice in it and what's really fun is we know that the reason that God also disciplines is because yes he's refining us he's shaping us into a version of who he has created us to be because he has a plan for our lives he has a plan for your life he has a plan for who you're going to be and who you're going to continue to grow into becoming which is amazing he's so proud of you right now like who you are right now he's great because this was a part of the plan too if it wasn't for who you are right now you wouldn't become who you are in the future great it's worth celebrating right now for sure but his plan is to continue to grow you and it's temporary this episode is brought to you by glorify the number one Christian daily devotional app i was recently having a conversation with a friend and just talking about the transparency of how it can actually be kind of hard to stay connected with God throughout the day i think that a lot of times we can get kind of caught up in the hustle and bustle or again just like pressure of life things that are just happening in the now and so funny enough that person had asked me how i stay connected to God throughout the day and without hesitation one of the very resources that came to my mind was the glorify app it has been a study part of my life for almost a year now and when you open the app what's really nice is that there's always something new so there's fresh devotionals new courses content that meets me right where i am and points me back to God every time and so if you've been craving other resources and things to use tools on how to center back to the Lord every day all day glorify is a really beautiful resource to have on your phone so go ahead and download the glorify app and create space for God in your every day and listeners to the show can get full access to the glorify app just for 29.99 for the entire year that's glorify's lowest price ever when you download the glorify app now at glorify dash app.com slash alley get full access all year for just 29.99 at glorify dash app.com slash alley that's glorify dash app.com slash alley do thoughts like did i really mean that prayer or what if God's disappointed in me play over and over in your head or do you keep worrying that you're not believing hard enough that every unwanted thought might be blasphemy or that you've somehow lost your salvation experiences like that can be signs of religious OCD but because OCD is so misunderstood a lot of people don't even know that it can latch on to religious beliefs and real OCD is nothing like the stereotypes about just liking things organized it's a serious and highly misunderstood condition where unwanted distressing thoughts get stuck on repeat in your mind and you feel compelled to actually engage in certain behaviors to try to make them stop but of course there is hope OCD is highly treatable with the right kind of specialized therapy and what actually works for OCD is ERP therapy or exposure and response prevention no CD is the world's leading provider of OCD treatment all of their licensed therapists truly understand OCD and specialize in ERP therapy therapy with no CD is actually 100% virtual covered by insurance for over 155 million Americans and includes support between sessions so you're never facing OCD alone to learn more about starting OCD therapy with no CD go to no CD.com and book a free call to learn more about how they can help you that's no CD.com granted the suffering like suffering never really ends and like growing or fine being crushed pruned all those really fun christianese words but true like that doesn't end but like you know God gives us breaks there are breaks I'm not suffering all the time like there are seasons where you're really going to go through it but then you're going to see who you are on the other end you're going to see the fruit that comes out of it you're going to look around in your life and you're going to go God that's why you had me go through that that's why that was so painful because you had this planned it's actually the same promise in genesis 15 okay so remember when Abraham fell into a deep sleep right and then the whole thing with the smoking fire pot and the flaming torch okay but right before that when he was asleep and God was speaking to him he was promising the future of the descendants that were to come and the nations that were to come after Abraham from Abraham okay but what was so interesting about what God had said in it was he wasn't just like an Abraham everything's going to be amazing like all the descendants you're going to not only be a father but you're going to be a father of look up at the stars and try to count how many that's how many descendants are going to come from you right so he's like promising all that but he didn't just say that God said to Abraham you can be sure that your descendants will be strangers in a foreign land where they will be oppressed and slaves for 400 years but I will punish the nation then enslaves them and in the end they will come away with great wealth as for you you will die in peace and be buried at a ripe old age after four generations your descendants will return here to this land for the sins of the Amorites do not yet warrant their destruction this is a crazy thing to say God said hey by the way to get to where I I have your descendants going I promise I have good for them but first your descendants will be strangers in a foreign land and that is actually where they will be oppressed and slaves for 400 years oh my gosh 400 years it's like in that God was preparing Abraham for the complexity of his promise but in that promise he says that there will be blessings but also trials will be a part of that plan yeah and that's in Genesis honey that's the very beginning of the Bible God's already saying yeah by the way I have plans for your life and I even have plans for the generations to come after you but it won't be easy there will be trials there will be pain there will be suffering um and so yeah it's just like nothing new under the sun you know we're walking the same walk as children of God now as children of God were then so even when it is hard to be disciplined by our Heavenly Father it's such a joy because it means that he loves us and it means that he has a plan for our life and it means that he hasn't given up on us it means that he believes in us which is so sweet he does and it's sweet I feel like I've been I've been really leaning on the Holy Spirit to guide me in this journey of discipline um because I think there have been plenty of times where I've tried to do stuff like this and then I give up because I'm trying to do it in my own power and I'm trying to do it in my own discernment of like what I think is right of how quickly I should be doing it or like how many new things I want to take on it once and the truth is I always failed because I was not first asking the Lord and so I think now as eager as I am in some ways I'm eager but as eager as I am in some ways to you know tighten up the places of my life that I know need it now that God's revealed it to me I'm also like okay Holy Spirit but like realistically where do you want me to start and just take it like one day at a time with him like for the first few months it really was like working out and having that routine was getting me up early in the morning and now my body like wants to wake up that early because I've made a habit of it over the last couple months and so now with me getting up even an hour earlier than that which was already insane like me doing my workouts at 7 30 in the morning I was girl I never thought I could be that person I genuinely it was like always something I wanted but I never thought I could be that person so now that we we've nailed that that was really challenging but now it feels kind of natural we're like my body naturally wants to wake up at that time I'm pushing it a little bit more and now I've added another thing of discipline to my routine which is like okay now I'm also going to make time like actual time to be in the word like really in it for an hour before I have to start getting ready to work out and yeah I think that if I tried to do all of that at once I would have been like I'm not doing this and so it's really important that if there are areas of your life that you know you're like okay God I feel really convicted about this and I want to make more time for you and I don't want to make excuses anymore whatever that looks like ask the Holy Spirit and He will guide you He will guide you He will tell you He will give you peace and then He will give you a lack of peace like if you have peace about doing like changing one aspect of your routine great or your life yes follow that but if you're feeling a lack of peace or you're like oh I don't know there's a difference between when I tell God like I don't know because I just don't want to and like an actual like caution sign in my gut from the Holy Spirit saying if you do this you're you're just going to let yourself down it's too much Ali and I feel confident that you guys also know that the difference with that like you've experienced that you know when you're just like I don't know about that because you just like feel scared or you just don't want to or you're like it feels too challenged I don't know I'm scared I don't want to it's like way more in your emotion versus like actually coming from like your gut you know like the Holy Spirit inside of you that's like gives you that peace or not so anyway thanks for letting me share all of that with you guys I don't really know what this episode was but it was really fun and like Loki therapeutic for me and I pray that in whatever ways it was supposed to speak to you that it did and it inspired you in a way and yeah we're just all on this journey together but like I genuinely feel like this is the time for all of us to level up God is like I want you to level up this is what's so gracious and kind about Jesus and it's why I've like been like extra tender lately like I'm typically always unwell by Jesus and his presence like I'm never just like chillin I'm always just on my snot falling out of my feet like he's everything but I've been like extra undone because I've realized like I don't actually have to do any of this alone and I think anytime I've approached change in my life from a majority of my life it was because like I had to make sure that it happened and I had to do it and it is actually the kindness of the Lord again just like what he did with Abraham with the covenant he was like actually Abraham I just need you to follow me I just need you to listen to me and obey me and love me and follow me and I got it but it's like the fact that I don't have to do this out of my own strength I don't have to do this alone in the minute that you feel like you're doing it out of your own strength you're not leaning on Jesus enough you're leaning too much on your own understanding and I am guilty of that I've even done that coming on the podcast sometimes I feel like even me admitting at the beginning of this podcast saying I feel like I put pressure on myself and I feel like I have to show up and be like this crazy prophet or like this crazy you know pastor and it's like yeah I'll because you're probably leaning on your own understanding and you're not just like leaning on Jesus enough you know I do lean on Jesus a lot with this podcast but I think having that mentality is like leaning too much on my own understanding and believing that I have to be something other than just like with Jesus but that is genuinely what's had me so undone I think I've had a deeper revelation and understanding of like what it means to like do things hard things grow do challenging things um go to the next level but with Jesus like he literally is like I'll do it with you I'll even be your strength too I'll give you what you need to do it just do it with me it blows my mind so he's he is a humble humble he is a humble king who cares and loves you so much and he's not going to ask you to do hard things by yourself he's actually going to carry you through it he just needs your yes me waking up this morning was me giving him my yes saying you're worthy God you're worth it yes and then he does the rest you know it's beautiful he's the best and I can't wait to continue to learn more about who he is and his heart and I pray that for you guys as well and so I think right now would be a great time for us to finally do communion together it's been long enough if you are a believer of Jesus Christ and you believe that he died on the cross for your sins that he descended from heaven and humbled himself to be human as we are human fully human but also fully God and that three days after his crucifixion he rose from the death defeating sin entirely the sin of the world every sin you've ever done every sin you'll ever do he overcame all of it including death itself not even death could keep him down and if you believe he's going to come back one day then I would invite you to take communion with me um this is a really powerful way um it's actually one of the last things that Jesus asked us to do in remembrance of what he's done for us and I also really love communion because I feel like it's it's a way to just kind of release anything that I'm feeling anything that I could be caring by myself to repent and say Lord I'm so sorry for falling into a trap of believing I had to carry that on my own it's just a beautiful way of like being transparent and like naked with God you know what I mean and to just remember his goodness and his grace and so I do have a little copy right here of communion I have the blood and I have the elements right I have the blood and I have the body um if you guys have some great if you have bread and juice great um if you don't that's okay we can still pray together but um yeah let's just pray Jesus I thank you for today Lord I thank you for the gift of today God I thank you for the gift of the air in our lungs Lord I thank you for the gift of life Lord we recognize that it is so fragile so life is so fragile and it's not promised and it can be taken from us any second in a second life can change and so Lord I pray that we never take that for granted and Lord we repent for times that we have where we've gotten caught up in the hustle and bustle of life and drama and relationships and money and bills real things but also things not worth being anxious about at any time that we fall into anxiousness like that it's actually because we've forgotten your sovereignty and we've forgotten that you're in control and so Lord we come to you right now repenting for any ways that we've forgotten how involved you are in our lives Lord we thank you that you care that you hear us that you're listening yeah I feel like um if any of you have to just release tears or cry to the Lord I feel him encouraging you to do that right now to just let yourself cry in his lap like he's your dad because he is and he loves you so much and he hears you and he understands the pain that you're enduring or just the uncertainty the confusion the anxiety the sleepless nights worrying he's not mad at you for those things he understands it but he's asking for you to finally just put those things in his hands so I I want you guys to actually like physically look like look in your hands as if they're in it and like use your imagination this is a fun thing that God has actually ministered to me as of recently is like I love using my imagination with God and there was like this weird thought in my mind as I was doing that that told me that that was really silly and that it wasn't real like a lot of times like I genuinely will see Jesus again he's not like not a physical Jesus but like in my imagination or maybe in the spirit like I genuinely will see him in the room with me and I felt the Lord be like yeah Ali your imagination is something I intended for you to use with me so yes it's part imagination it's part he's actually with us but like he reminded me that children do that all the time kids use their imagination all the time and God also calls us to be child like he literally tells us to be like children not in an immature way because it's not funny that God's also like teaching me discipline and he's like maturing me and growing me up in ways but also he's still encouraging me to be childlike and to use my imagination and to believe in the unseen so I want you guys to use your imagination right now and also use your imagination with God more if you've been like please do that because he loves it and it's real he gave you your imagination for a reason it's real but I want you to imagine taking those very things that you've been stressed about you've been anxious about you have not been sleeping about it I know it I know it the only reason I know it is because God told you that I think right now Holy Spirit's revealing it to me I feel a lot of you are like literally not sleeping you're laying in bed for hours and you're worried about these things and he's he wants you to sleep he wants you to rest so take them and I want you to close your eyes and imagine Jesus sitting right in front of you crisscross applesauce he's sitting right with you okay and I want you to hand it over to him and put it in his lap all of those things that you're worried about it's okay you're doing so great this is exactly what he wants you to do he wants you to surrender them and say okay God I trust the destiny you have for my life I trust that you have these things under control and you will figure it out yeah Jesus we thank you we thank you for everything that you are we thank you for your sacrifice on the cross or we thank you for your body we thank you for your blood and so all together Lord we just take these elements as a family thank you God that we are a family that we are your children that Jesus you call us your brothers and sisters which is insane and we take your body and remembrance Lord of what you did for us God we love you Jesus so now we take the bread and Jesus we thank you for the blood that covers us oh my gosh thank you for the blood thank you for your blood Jesus that covers us from the top of our heads to the bottom of our feet Lord thank you that this blood covers our families our situations our lives it protects us every day Lord I plead the blood of Jesus over every single one of my friends on the other side of this podcast Jesus I plead the blood over their homes over their families God keep their babies safe keep their loved ones safe Jesus we plead the blood of Jesus Christ over our lives and our families Lord thank you for the protection of the blood we love you we honor you God thank you it's such a gift let us never take it for granted Lord in Jesus name amen yeah that's good stuff guys thank you Jesus y'all I love you I'm super proud of you thank you for being here this was awesome I loved today I loved today I hope you did too all right you guys before we go can we do something really cool today can we show somebody how cool Jesus is let's walk more like him talk more like him be more like Jesus today and every day I love y'all happy Friday have a beautiful weekend and I will see you this time next week bye