Uproot-a-rama | Ep. 1 | Good News, Everyone!

You all see the curvature of the dimwood. No, no, no, not the dimwood. You see the curvature of the canopy of the dim-dimwoods level in Arcadia. The digital arcade realm filled with video game collectibles, respawning mobs, and all sorts of whimsy and imagination. You see that this is a forest level, or a forest world, and all of you are standing together, gathered by the thing that gathers you so often. A beacon on the canopy, a beacon in the sky, a knurled toothed plague rat face in the sky, a beacon. The Weigor signal has been called. You know what this means. You know that it means that you have another job to do. You've all been called to the zone of the dim-dimwoods. Weigor's lair. You see a large spiraling mountain with a precarious wooden bridge, and there's a great mountainside, a cliffside in these woods with a horrifically sculpted face of a knurled plague rat, his mouth open, and a pathway in, big knurled eyes. And you see a big neon sign that's flickering, and it says, Seer Cool Express headquarters, we must away. That is so good. That is so good. It's so obvious in hindsight. Oh man. You see a phone number, and it's only seven digits because they didn't add area codes at this point. And it starts with 5.5. As you see now the Weigor signal is blaring against the tree canopy, as you all look up at Weigor's lair, as you all stand there, and you know that it may get weird, but you have a job to do. And with that, would you all like to describe your characters? I think we're going to start with Boxley. No, Boxley. Good boy, Boxley. And talk about your subclass, please. My name is Boxley G. Grug. I mean, hold on. No, Grumly T. Pug, and I am a bitling of the strong variety. Grumly is a cyberguard enforcer. He has the detective background, and he is a bitling, like I said. And for those that don't know what a bitling is, you can think of any of your 90s animal mascots like Sonic the Hedgehog, like Crash Bandicoot. That's what the bitling is. It can be any animal, as you can see here on screen. I tried to wear an appropriate T-shirt for today. And is there anything else to say? He has a large gun. What does he have? Oh, he's a Pug. He's a stout Pug. He's stronger than the average bitling, because he is the strong type. He has a kind of robo helmet. And you're not quite sure if it's a helmet that he can take off, or if it's built into his head. He wears a long kind of detective overcoat. And his legs look mechanical and robotic, too. So, and he's got a giant gun. Don't forget that. Yeah. Not like a giant giant gun, but like a big hand gun. Taller than this stout Pug is a tall, thin, well-dressed, surprisingly raccoon. Andy, tell us about your character. I am playing Booker T. Raccoon. I am also a bitling, but I am of the digital archetype Swift. So whereas my good friend, Grumly, is strong, I am a bit more speedy than the average bitling. I am a tall, thin, well-dressed raccoon, but most importantly, I play the saxophone because I am a soul jammer icon. Hell yeah. I am going to be bringing the dulcet tunes of smooth jazz to help calm the people around me and soothe their worries and fears as we have a job to do. Great. And about even taller than... It's a little intense. Oh man, I liked it. Okay. Even taller than Booker is a life, thin, digital-looking-esque frog that looks... That is an evil glint in her eye. Nikki, I think that might be you. Oh, we're not going to Hazel. Oh no. Oh, that is me. What a curveball. Yeah, no, you did curveball me. Yes, I'm playing... I'm playing Peji. Peji is a... Peji. I love it. Keep it. Keep it. No, no, no. Oh, sorry, sorry. I think that my code might be malfunctioning. I'm playing Peggy. Peggy is a bitling gridrunner of the virus variety. And she is naked under that cloak. What is that cloak made of, you might ask? Well, it's made up of all of your deleted search histories. That's a nightmare. That's a nightmare. And that's really all I have to say about Peji. What kind of lineage of the blackling is Peggy? It's not on my character sheet, right? It's in the top left here. Soaring. Soaring. Where? It's also on the overlay. No, it's not. It says... I can't read that. It says strong. It does, it does. Well, that's wrong. She's soaring. I was like, I know that I'm a flying one, but I don't see the name anywhere, so I was trying to avoid answering that question. Soaring. And even taller than her, very muscular, strutting around back and forth is a very large, and when people look at him they say, my god, that's a big fucking rooster. Nace, tell us about your character. I am playing Claude Jean-Teclère, a big fucking rooster. He is also a bit length of the digital archetype soaring. No, you're strong. I have to endure it, and I stole your archetype. You got Swyte. A digital soar of strong. He does not fly, which means he is very strong. Currently, I believe that the pen is mightier than the sword. Soon, I will no longer believe that. That's very funny. Because I am the subclass juggernaut, sorry, the class juggernaut subclass eternal, which means that when I channel it, I will channel my innate power and ascend and break my limits and go even further beyond. And at that point, I will no longer believe the pen is mightier than the sword. Thank you, miss. Thank you. Very clarification, say. Going back down, shrinking back down, you hear, you always hear at first the strange muttering gibbering of, that always follows a chipmunk with puffy cheeks. As you see a little chipmunk that has a tail and lower half that seems to be consumed by some, is it alien or is it berry? It's kind of hard to tell. Kelsey, tell us about you. You got berry all over my mouth. Whatever it is, it's a little bit sticky. I'll say that. I'm playing Hazel and I am playing a bitling Esper, a symbiote Esper. What's your digital archetype? My digital archetype is soaring. That's right. I wouldn't say you're a planet. No, I know. Yeah, so she is wearing a shirt very much like this shirt and she's wearing a jacket very much like this jacket. It's unclear from the art if she is indeed wearing pants or not. That's true. That's true. I'm not wearing a jacket. I know. It's clear and clear. None of the dim-dib ones. She might be dumb-ducking this. Yeah. Or we need a poo in it. Yeah, or we need a poo. So she's, and my background is an outlaw, so I'm running from something and what I will not say. Finally, there's no gibbering. There's almost no sound, almost like a ring of silence around this strange looking mouse. It's shrouded in darkness and robes as everyone's favorite mastermind, perhaps, is standing there. Derek, scrub your character. I am playing Bitsy Lo Bitsy, the cryptist shadow tongue. That means that I use the strings of the cosmos to manipulate others. I am no longer a believer in conspiracies. I am the conspiracy. Oh my god. I make the Illuma Naughty look a-luma nice. And I am a bitling as well, though it's hard to tell. I'm also naked under the cloak, but that is my secret. The bitling variety that I share with Booker, I am the swift variety, so if I need to, I can move at great speeds. You can't hit a target if it has already moved, as they say. Did you say that, Derek? Just like that. And yeah, if you like a Dorothy Jezorid vibes, then you come to the right place. And with that, you are in the dim, dim woods as you are looking up at Wygor's lair and the headquarters of Seer Cool Express. We must away. You've been, I don't know what else to say this. You have been summoned. What do you all do? Well, it looks like it's time for another job, Egg Runley. Yeah, yeah, I hope it goes better than the last one. Don't we all? I think it would have to. I mean, it can always go worse. I mean, it can always go worse. Oh yes, please go worse. We all hear the bumble parasite from Hazel's Tail. Hazel, we've talked about this. Control your tail. Yeah, it looks like that. The strange mouth opens and the berry-compote eldritch void parasite that is fused with Hazel's form craves misfortune. The bumble hunger is for failure. I just fed you. You stopped that. Oh, I'm so hungry. Well, I know that you say it. I guess we could eat a little something. Just a snack. Maybe a Dunkaroo. Mr Wygor always has some cheese or some pitch. Do you like pitch? Oh yes. Well, I didn't expect it to say that. We have been some and I'm sure it'll have snacks including pitch inside. You can satiate your tail. Well, it's not picky. Well, I guess we should get going. That mountain in the corkscrew spiral shape should probably start making our way up to the top so we can cross the rickety wooden bridge and into his deep dark layer, don't you think? Every time we get a job, it takes like three days to get up there. All right, let's start. I hover into the air and just fly above you guys. I basically just float. I am capable of great speed, but I'm moving like the loom from repo. I'm just like gliding along. You can't actually see your feet. Yeah, you can't see my feet at all. I'm strutting very powerfully up the spiral elevation in front of us. You make your way up the spiraled mountain across the rickety bridge and you see the big large snaggle tooth rat face in the side of this cliff face as you hear the sound of bubbling and laughing of mysterious things and you almost hear the like Halloween cards from CBS. And it says, I'll beware all who enter here unless you want a good deal. As you make your way into Wygor's lair and you know you've been in here plenty of times. This is your place of employment. You make your way through the spooky dark tunnels as you hear the upbeat period appropriate mid-century modern music that Wygor favors that's upbeat and jazzy. And you make your way. You see that there's you go past the torture dome and then you go to the break room and grab yourself a cup of coffee from the Arcadia Keurig machine. Oh, and you make your way through until you know you go make your way to Wygor's office. At the very top of this place, you open the door. You know that if you knock, you probably wouldn't be able to hear you as you open this doorway to the strange mad scientist lair, but with a surprisingly pristine 80s finance guy desk in the middle of it. Wow. As you see a hunched bitling like yourself, but a plague rat and with so many strange mechanical cybernetic enhancements, you don't know if he's more machine than rat or machine than bitling. As you see a brain and a jar on his head, a big hunched cloak as he's on a large blocky phone as he is. Ah, yes. So how's the family? Oh, to trends, you said. Oh, and the children. Oh, to trends, you said. Oh, well, you know what they say. Can't move them all. Well, I suppose I should be going now. Ah, yes, bingo. Yes. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Yes, bingo. Ah, yes. Oh, and the mailman. Oh, to threads, you said. Very well. Okay. Goodbye. Oh, no, you hang up. Ha, no, you hang up. Why gore hangs up the phone finally. What a yapper. Why gore, you have summoned us, though you did not mean to. Or perhaps you did. Yes, actually, you did some of us. Ah, yes. We saw the ygore signal. Mine digital employees. That's us. Back again for another job. Working for wages that have not kept up with the plies. That's true. Yeah, I mean, that's why we have to keep doing that. All according to the grand design. And will accept me good PTO policies. All according to the grand design. You don't get PTO? I don't think any of us get PTO. I've been taking PTO. Ah, you must report a job. I'll go back to the torture dome. You're the lion, beater. It's OK that wages haven't kept up. We all share a dank, wet ground floor basement apartment. So we're doing OK. We're combining living expenses as you must. Yes, frugal. As you must. I prefer a dank if you know what I mean. I don't know what he means. No, I don't know. Oh, no, I'm looking at it at search history right now. I know exactly what he means. Why is my name coming up sometimes in your search history? You see big bombs. Show big bombs. Oh, boy. Oh, you're nasty. How does she make bombs? I'd assume it on the computer. I suppose you're all wondering why you've been subbed here. Why have we been summoned here? Hoping to hear about a new job, right? Yes. Me too. Me too. Why have we been summoned here? Why have you come here? That's the question I will ask. Wait, wait, you don't, you say, I say you don't know? You said, you said the signal up. Oh, why have you been summoned? Why have we been summoned? Perhaps I received a division. I'll ask you a cool. Glad to be your knowledge. Oh, no, this is the brain that's the sea of cool for the equivalent of a Tuesday. I forgot it's the equivalent of a Wednesday. As you see as he gets up, as he pushes back his rolling chair and rather than walking, you see a propeller pack on his back that goes as he hovers above the ground. As you see a wooden cabinet of fine mahogany with a bunch of different brains and jars. As he takes the one off and you see he has a brain in his skull. He just has a bald spot. Over it. As he grabs another brain in the jar and puts it on his head. As he hovers over and he says, Ah, appropriately timed, sea of cool. Glad to be your knowledge. Ah, yes. Ah, good news, everyone. We have a new order for a delivery. Give it up. Incredible. Got to give it up to Simon Mako. Unbelievable. Just absolute, absolute peak. Thank you for that. Hopefully you all enjoyed that. And you can stand tonight for life. I'm gonna watch it 100 more times. I definitely want to go sit watching it again. That's it. We'll be back in two weeks. Find out what the delivery is in two weeks. Why gore looks at you. Ah, yes. I was just on the phone with my good, good dear friend, Overlord Shrogba. And he needs one of my doomsday devices. One of my doomsday power-ups. And you know where you've heard of Shrogba's spooky castle? Shrogba. In the level it's magnum municipality. Absolutely. I've totally heard of that. Ah, yes. Ah, yes. He requires its post-taste. We're all on him down. I'll sniff him out. That's what we do best. He can't hide from us. He doesn't want to hide from us. Oh, oh, we're just gonna have a nap. He wants to be found. So we can take him to the sink. Well, next time I'll hunt him down. I think we're supposed to use a hand on the doomsday device. Ah, yes. The power-up. It'll power-up up. Why gore? Is that like a sex thing or? Oh, we're supposed to ask questions for the customer. Oh, to the H.R. get to the Iron Man. Oh, God, all right. Do we have to deliver it under a brown paper bag? Yes. I knew it, and I'm gonna get into the Iron Man. Well, we're not supposed to know. It was a doomsday device. Oh, God. How long do I have to be in here? Why gore? Ah, until the pain consumes you when you rethink your entire existence. Ah. Just go without me. I'm gonna be in here for a long time. Aw, even worse. Submitted H.R. survey. Well, yes. He reaches into his drawer and he pulls out a brown paper bag. It's a little damp. Oh, okay. It's a little damp. He drops onto the... Can I reach for it? Oh, yeah. And I'll pick it up and... Are you sure I'm not allowed to ask what's in here? Ah, yes. The same rules as... That wonderful filled drive. I love Ryan Gosling. He's literally me. I've already seen that one, yeah? Oh, it's a good one. It's a good one. We should wash it later. Now I'm measuring why gore wearing a hoodie that says, I'm Kenna. That's amazing. Do you guys would have washed it later, maybe, when you get back? No. Oh, why'd you? Why'd you? It's a pretty cool movie. Oh, well, I've got to take the iron movie. Well, maybe we can just watch it on the flat over. Why gore wants to watch it with us? Oh. It would be kind of rude if we just, you know, cut our employer out of movie night. Oh, well, okay. Well, are you coming on the delivery? Oh, no. Oh, well, do you want me to? I mean, do you have other plans? You're just sitting here, changing out brain pans and sending people to the Iron Maiden? Of course we do, Mr. Wargo. We always love your company. I mean, I was going to play a little bit of Clay Fighter 63 and one third later. Oh, I love that game. Well, I mean, I guess I don't know. I was going to do business things, business owner things. Just bring it with you. Do you think we have a little time for some Nintendo 64? Why gore tell me, did Overlord Trogwar, did he promise us simple currency or leverage? Well, I mean, I usually only demand leverage of particular devices and power-ups. This is a doomsday device and I feel this sunk. More like a wet paper bag, but sure, keep going. I suppose you're wrong. Why should I demand leverage? That's what I'm saying, Wargore. You're doing it. You're believing. And if you know anything about Overlord Trogwar, all his clots are full of skeletons. Full of skeletons. Real skeletons are the other kind. Oh, that's a cemetery. Massive skeletons. Fucking. Excellent. He's done. He killed. He's dead. Fucking. He's going to be totally cool to us though, right? It's like totally safe to deliver to him. Oh, wow. He does have, this nickname is Satan-hearted bone-dead. Wow. Wait, that's a nickname? And he's truly as evil as the deepest deaths of cacophony. There's all of my dear and dear boss friends are. You'll probably be fine. I don't know. Ah. But just for a head count, are you coming or not? I mean, I suppose I could stay on the ship. I threw my back out and I don't have the parts to repair it. So you threw it literally in the trash or did you just twist it? No, I threw it in the trash. It was really pissing me off. It was beating me off. You really just don't need any of us. You're going to hold me to the table. Can we just go downstairs and watch? Anybody want to go to IOP? What are you guys doing right now? Before we leave, let's go watch DRIVE. Yeah, let's go watch DRIVE. I see little bitsy. What does he mean? I mean, God, this was such a devil. I think that you should join us. Everybody voted yes. And I love democracy. Ah, yes. So what do you think to say? I mean, it is, perhaps, don't tell that awful old trog boy. I suppose you guys probably don't want me to come along. He has a big extended robot arm. You have big and you have bitlings. You all have four fingers, but he has a very suspiciously five finger glove that waves it off. I'm asking because I'm trying to gauge, like, how often does Wygour join us and how dangerous is this? I would think like he wouldn't want to go if it was a super dangerous thing, right? I'm trying to suss this out because I know that he's a little hesitant to tell us about what we're potentially car-going. I would say that Wygour occasionally comes. It really depends on what's fun and for the comedy of the adventure. Yeah, and sometimes he tags along for missions. Yeah, yeah. But it's pretty rare. You guys usually go on your own, but you know, you feel like maybe for this one, it's been a while since he's been on a caper. At least he could join you on perhaps and stay on the ship. Come on, Wygour, come on, everybody wants you to come. Yeah, we can play clay fighter. Have you unlocked Gribble Gym yet? Ah, Gribble Gym. Ah, he'll lose me still. He's my favourite character. We can unlock him together. Ah, I really like the chap that is that, the carrot nose. Ah, yes. The snowman character. Ah, yes, he was made of snow, wasn't he? I forgot about that. It was just an illusion, Wygour. It was all clay, every bit of it. Get this with true. That is the power of the Nintendo 64. It can make anything look like anything all of the time. Oh, yes, no wonder all bosses in the video game Overlord Guild has one of your order at their side. Oh, nothing but honesty and truth. I see that my countenance has struck a chord and that that chord has resonated and that you will come with us and you will aid us in our mission to deliver this filthy sack. He seems a little reluctant. I have foreseen this skepticism. I'll say, come on, Wygour, we'd love to play on the Nintendo 64 with you. Well, I suppose I'm not getting any younger. Well, if it would help sweeten the deal, I also have said the Dreamcast. We could use some Power Stone. You overshadowed the Dreamcast. You get Power Stone? Actually, my favorite. I shake out my robes and from one of my sleeves falls a Dreamcast and cracks against the floor. This is the biggest controller I've ever seen. It's got this little square screen. Nobody knows what it does. They're just mysterious. I suppose it's settled then. To the Wygour helicopter. To the Wygour helicopter. We're going on a delivery. Well, I suppose I should get ready. Gosh, I could really use a nice hard scene transition here. I'll be on the Wygour helicopter if the answer I... Let me give it a try. Let me give it a try. He's coming with us. Exactly as I have arranged. And in a screen wipe, left to right. And then you hear... Guys, is anybody going to let me out of this iron, mate? Hello? Hello? And see. And screen-wise. And screen-wise. As you are all in the underground portion of this, it is dank. You see there's all these sewer pipes that is flowing with green toxic sludge. You have no idea what it is and where it comes from. Just like our apartment. A hazelnut gets me to the brain. Just a taste of the sludge. I don't think we should eat that. We all have the same appetite. Just as it morsels a treat. I think there was some donuts in the break room. Maybe that instead of the sludge. Just to start. Little appetiser. Do you think they have a bear claw? Probably. Warm apple fruit. Another scene wipe. They're a little stale. As you see an enormous spaceship. And it would be the size, mechanically speaking, for neon odyssey as a light transport. As it is very boxy in its design. It is almost like a big rectangle with a tube. And once again, a metal approximation of Wygor's head at the front of it where the cockpit is. With wings. It almost looks like when you were a child and you would make the little tissue paper. Oh yeah. And it would basically look like one of those flies. That's doggy. You all get aboard as Wygor putters up the landing pad. As he gets into the common room of the ship as you're all there. As he says, oh that took a bit out of me. I suppose I should go into a hibernating stasis for a while. When you see, you hear the flash. As the alarms, as the back of the entire ship opens. And so the strange chamber as mist spills out. As he putters and he goes, oh. As he's immediately flashed, pros, and you hear the. As. Probably I never get used to that. Ah, he's just getting his beauty rest. That's so Booker. I thought he wanted a wise drive. That was like the whole point of him coming on the trip with us. For the in-flight movie. He brought us adventure and brain and everything. We used to play clay fighter though. Most of these games only play four players anyway. It's for the best. You're right. You're right. All right. How far we got to go this time? Well, certainly we have some coordinates or something. He must have given us some information. How does this normally work? God of this world? I can sniff him out. Oh, there's the map right over there. Can you check the navigation systems? I think we just have to put it in. I'm running out of my own nose, so. Oh. Sorry, baby. I keep forgetting about that. I don't know why we had to bring that thing. You could have just let me out inside of his office. Yeah. What do you want me to do? You want me to hack the mainframe? Yeah, I want you to hack the mainframe. Yeah, of course. Really? Give it any idea how much this guy spends on new-boy eats. Yeah. Peggy, I need you to make a computer check with your grid spiking kit. Well, if there's four players, I guess Hazel will be flooring the ship. That still means that there's five of us. Oh, I don't mind sitting down. I'll cheer you on, Grumly. You don't want to play? Oh, you know, I like just watching the game. I'll always miss out. 22. Well, if Hazel were flying and I say, I'll say, Peggy's working the computers, then that leaves the four of us to play. Well, right now, I'm waiting for something to download, so I'm playing Frogger. Oh, shit. Frogger! Yeah. I should have looked over at you. I was doing really well. You were fairly progressed. Does this TV have those, like, red, yellow and white inputs? I don't see any. I just see, like, slots, like sci-fi-looking slots. Hold on. Check the back. Oh, wait. Maybe the other side. And I try to, I spend the next 10 minutes looking for inputs. I'm making an investigation check. Oh, I'm proficient at that. And... Oh, sniffing out these slots. And you'll see the little visor on my helm, like, flash. And I'm going to start scanning. Get my own. As I use my scanning enhancement. Oh, my tactical cybernetics to the cyberguard. I make investigation and perception checks at advantage. Oh! Could be worse. A 15. A 15. It takes you a while. I'm just kind of, like, looking around. And then suddenly your, you see Grumly's visor start to blink and glow as your cyberguard scanning senses it. And there is, just on the back, which is a little higher up than you're able to reach and a little thin behind it. There's a little chunky and a little short to be able to reach behind it. Bitsy, I think it's there, but I can't reach it. Do you mind scampering up there? Um... I'll scamper. Okay. Make a dexterity check for me. Oh! Oh, what's my d20 going to be? This little guy. Acrobatics. Acrobatics? Yeah. 18. Nice. 18. You effortlessly do this, and despite my best efforts, you do not destroy the machine as you're able to set up the gaming console as... Is this one of those panels where, like, there's, like, a plastic frame, and I have to, like, push down a little tiny lever in order to pressure fit it out, and then I find the plug, and then I put the plug in. Yeah, yeah, that's why you need to use a scanning tech. Okay, okay. I got it! Oh my god, it's turning on, it's turning on its plate! Oh, right! Hand out controllers. It's working! Well, I'll play until Peggy's free, and I'll take over, no big deal. Oh, it's got to be on channel two. Oh, we'll switch it over. I scamper and I switch it over. You do that very easily now. Oh, okay. Oh, there's a dog character! I call him... Oh! What's the code about that, come on. I'm just going to play that blob again. I'm just going to button mash anyway. It's not like I know what I'm doing. You always play the green blob. It's just easy. I don't have to think about anything. It uses the blob. I'll play the mushroom guy this time. Betsy, who are you playing? I have to look at the light, I'm just a minute. Well hurry up, you're slowing the bit down. As they play Gladefighter 63 in the third, you are able to, you feel the digital malware that suffuses your very being, filter its way into the console of the Wygorcopter, which is not just a starship, but it's a trans-dimensional hopping ship. But you know you don't even need to go to any other dimension. This delivery is in Arcadia. It should be relatively easy. You should just be able to fly. And you find, it takes you a bit, but you are able to find the exact coordinates of the Trogbars Spooky Castle in the malevolent magma municipality level. And you know it's a lava world, basic stuff. There's many lava levels in lava worlds. It's all pretty basic. Yeah. But you know, I guess with that, you know that you won't be able to just bring the Wygorcopter indirectly. I'll keep bringing this indirectly. You know that Overlord Trogbar is very paranoid. And you kind of wish that Wygorcopter told you that. You're gonna get a lot of flying walls. And he has all sorts of incredible cannons with semi-sentient bullets that are ship-seeking and anti-aircraft. Whenever there's just almost like a commercial jet that flies over, it's a real tragedy. It's a big problem. It's a big problem. So you know it's restricted airspace. Yeah. And it's not very well-documented, honestly. And so you know that you will need to... What are you hiding behind in the cafe walls? You will need to land the vehicle. You know that there's an enormous lava moat around it that is several miles wide. And it's in the middle of a very classic evil boss video game Overlord sort of thing. Castle on the surrounded by lava. Is there a bridge where if you cross the five spaces at random, a hand might grab you and pull you to another level? You think that might be a possibility. Oh, okay. Or if you stand on one of the tiles too long, it might fall away and you plummet into lava. Oh, that could absolutely happen. I hate when that happens. While I'm also doing this, can I hack into their game? Oh. Where's the playing play fighter, correct? Yeah, yeah. Because Bitsy's all about secrets, she's playing one of the unlockable characters. She's been playing Sumo Santa, which shockingly was voiced by Jim Cummings. She's fucking out of nowhere. I too changed my answer because I didn't realize this was a real game. I played the T-Hoppy the Battle Bunny. Oh, yeah, right there. My character's actually called Blob. Oh, no, I see that now. I see that now. That's the one I actually played, so well done. Who would have guessed Clay Fata 63 and a third was real game? Oh, it was real. Is it actually real game? Yeah, it was real, all right. Oh, yeah. We're not joking. I'm making any of this up. It was a fucking great game. That's what you meant about the snow game. It was an excellent game. It was an excellent game. I thought it had to be one of their lives. It's literally Mortal Kombat with claymation. Yeah, the snowman's like the Bruce Guy T-Guy on Crack. Earthworm Jim was a good game. Voiced by Dan Castanella Netta, the same voice as Homer Simpson, which is crazy. Whoa, Icky-Bod Clay? That's right, Icky-Bod. Bad-ass, bad-ass Scarecrow. A mushy jack-o-lantern. Oh, scared-rope, probably. Boo-hoo Ken. Anyway, I'd like to hack into the game. Oh, okay. I would say because you are a virus gridrunner, that you would be able to attempt this to do this stealthily. What I'll say is just quick give me another computer's check with your grid-spike. Same, 22. 22. And then to see how stealthily you do it, give me a sleight of hand check. Maybe an intelligent sleight of hand? An intelligent sleight of hand, yes. Exactly right. So you're going to add seven to this. Oh, okay, good. Ten. Ten. You are all playing your game. And you see this horrible stream of red and black code. Is that big Sam? Oh, no. It's big Sam from Gundam Battle Assault 2 shows up. Literally eight times the size of all of you is just big, just two legs, and he rogues. And he just slives and smashes and stumps all of you. Killing all of you. Peggy wins. Peggy wins. Why does this always happen? Man, it's always big Sam. Peggy always used to win every game. I'm just really good at gaming. You don't even have a controller. I don't need one. It's treason then. I wouldn't go that far, Bitsy. It is cheating. Oh, yeah, I'm sorry. It's cheating then. It's alright, Bitsy. It's just a game. We're having fun. It's all good. You're going to see a story all the time. I would argue that cheating makes you a sore winner. I didn't cheat. What's your proof? Oh, maybe big Sam's just one of those unlockable characters we haven't caught in the next agreeable gym. What? Also then said Peggy wins. Peggy wins. Yeah, because I won. But you don't have a controller. I don't need one. Oh, okay, well. The mind is the controller. All I need is my keyboard. Oh, but that's not within the general rules of the game. So it's like, that's it. Okay, show me the rule book then. Well, Bitsy produced the rule book out of your sleeves. Oh, it's right here. The rule book comes out. Tons of Super Nintendo paper manuals. You're just luring this one. You try to move the page, but it's covered in jelly from Hazel. And all of the pages are just completely... Oh, no, I've been licking my fingers. Oh, that's definitely... Yeah, you're in trouble. I was one arm, I kept doing it because the page wouldn't turn. Oh, please. No, it's delicious. You really should. It's a busy battery. It is delicious. The bumble craves. The bumble hungers to play Ogre Battle 64. You hush now and you each have in-flight peanuts. Oh, peanutty. Peggy always had to play the claymation game. Why don't you ever let me pick the game? Because the claymation is so expertly crafted. It's a work of art. It's beautiful. Well, and it's also what Bitsy shot out of her sleeve. We could grab Bitsy by the legs and give her a shake and see if other games fall out. All right, we'll do it then. You're strong enough. Well, okay. I'll give it a try because it seems funny in the moment. All right, come here, Bitsy. You see me crackle with energy as you... No, stop, stop, stop! What's that again? What's that? The red cartridge carnage game for Super Nintendo. That's pretty cool. Hey, this is the collectibles. Let's let this go. Oh, my goodness. Wait a minute. I've seen one of these before. I thought there was going to be a Super Nintendo in here. The banana controller from Donkey Kong 64. Oh, it is. Shake heart of shot claw. Bitsy gave us his secrets. Give us your secrets. You eat version of caveman games. I got all my secrets. A thin needle falls out and crackles on the floor. You don't touch that. You don't touch that for one second. None of you. Why do you have a needle amongst your things? Have you figured out that I'm all about secrets? Sure. Well, all right then. All right, shot claw, put it down. Put it down. No more shaking bits. You hang onto the... Yeah, that... Oh, man. Well, well, there are your options, I suppose. We can either use the Donkey Kong 64 banana controller. Always one of those, though. And there's just this carnage game. It's red. It's cool, but I've never played it. I'm voting for the carnage game. I don't have the console. Why would you carry the game around if you don't have the console? They're very rare. They're worth a lot of money. I mean, I can probably hack into that Dreamcast and turn it into one of those other things. Can you do that? Why don't I try? Oh. You could turn a Dreamcast into an SNES? My eyes point out in all directions. They go a little bit red, and I'd stare at Peggy. Do it. I'd like to try an hand at the console. Holy shit. I'm making another computer check with your grid spiking tools. Oh, my gosh. 21. 21. You take some time, and you see this horrible virus from the hyper grid. As reality itself is shorting out and glitching. As it goes into this machine, as it sparks and fizzles. As you hear it cracking. Turn around. As you see it start to change, and it seems to be one of those all-in-one scam emulators that's certainly legally a nightmare. It's absolutely violating the whole lot of intellectual property. Oh, I put slime wire on this so we can get whatever we want. Ooh. Cool. While this is going on, I would have been haphazardly pushing buttons at the helm. Okay. You are haphazardly pushing buttons. Are you telling me to fly? I sure am. Okay. So you see that the coordinates are there to the malevolent magma and municipality level. As you sit behind and you take the piloting station of this light freighter. I need you to make a dexterity check using your proficiency. Six. Hold on. So plus three, plus two. Okay. That's five total. 21. Nice. 21. You all hear the engines whirr as you feel your tail start to stretch as you're starting to press and flick buttons as then the bumble, the bumbleberry also starts to swoop over and little tendrils point out and he's pulling in the co-pilot's chair. Hitting buttons and navigation. It's like it goes to the shell when the hand separates into 50 different fingers. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. And all of a sudden it'll be with tendrils. He's a real life clay fighter. Could you get that? You can't. Yeah, that lever right there. Just pull that one. There you go. Say punch it chewy. I'm not going to say that. Too bad. As you see a little mouth, a split off from the mass of berry and then grab the thruster and push it forward as you all feel the Y Gore copter blast upward out of the mountain as you take to the sky as you look out for those of you not familiar with the delivery of these hazel. You see this. You see the low polygon trees and various sub areas and sub zones of a dimmed in woods as you leave Y Gore's layer behind. Who has the delivery again as you have the delivery as you know that you're on off to your next destination. And that's where I take a break. All right. Hey everyone. Andy Flynn here and I have huge news. Our next Kickstarter campaign is coming and it's called neon Odyssey. It's a 1400 plus page space opera trilogy for Dungeons and Dragons 5.5e. It has tons of options for players and GMs alike including an entire galaxy to explore, 30 plus species, 40 plus subclasses, a brand new space combat system and so much more. It's taken us three whole books to fit it all in. You can become a VIP at neonrpg.com to unlock a free set of neon nights, sharp edge resin dites and more. It's only a dollar. Become a VIP now at neonrpg.com. Thank you. You blast through the sky at Arcadia and as you go through levels, up levels to different worlds, different stages, some worlds entirely pixelated. Some you almost warp to 2D as you make your way through the sky. Some becomes lower poly, some becomes higher poly. Some the whole world is made out of blocks. Others are more kind of angular. Sometimes it gets a little bit more rounded. You're always excited when you go to a tropical frutiger arrow level where everything is blue and green and beautiful with amazing water and sky effects. Are there a number of times where we think we're about to go around a mountain but the hitbox is actually much wider than it appears so we bump into it? Yeah, well you would but with the Wygorcopter you're able to basically open up a portal and advance the next stage as you go across Hazel and the Bumbleberry are making a very good move. You know that the malevolent magma musicality is pretty far. What are you all doing on this journey? Anything in particular? As you ready for your, as Gimpy Peggy's told you, you're going to have to have a bit of a journey on foot. Anyone feeling inspired? No, I'm making a character decision here. It would be completely unheard of for me to look in the bag. I would never do that. I mean, I feel like we trust our employer. And I don't think you would look. I really don't. But that's what I was thinking about. I was deep in thought when you were asking if anybody wanted to. I'm trying to, I don't, I don't think the Booker would look in the bag. I really don't. Peggy is a, are you going to look in the bag? That's an absolutely crazy suggestion. I would never look in the bag. You should look in the bag. No, we don't do that. We have the trust of our employer and we make sure that we get these confidential packages to the delivery people that we have to get them to. Come on. Very well. Peggy's are spending the entire time downloading songs on slime wire and ripping some CDs. Oh, Peggy's mix, four hundred, four hundred and seventy nine thousand six hundred and eighty nine. I love that. That's it. I, Jean-Claude would be, I believe journaling. I have a, I have a favorite pen that I always use. Are you live journaling? No, in a, in a, in a notebook, like almost like a notepad. I'm lying back and like presumably if like maybe there are beds or like even cots that they kind of pop off the wall. I think throughout the journey, you can see me climbed up in a cot. Maybe my, you know, my legs folded over notebook. Like I'll say, and then, and then why I go okay, but he went to sleep immediately. And then I grabbed bits of by the legs and shook it real hard and well, no SNES, but we didn't get to play play fighter 63 and a third. And I found out that was real game today. And well, you know, battle bunny, that was fun. Then, you know, pig, cheated, big, big cheetah. She cheated and then big, big yams came out of nowhere and then, and then stopped off. I'm losing, I'm losing the accent. So I'm, I'm backing, I'm backing. I'll say, I'll say, I'll say, I'll say, I'll say, and then big yams came out of the sky and stomped on us. Are you writing? I say, I say, every time I talk. I'll say, I'll say, I'll say, I'll say, general. And then this happened. I write, I write. R��������������� As, uh, if you remember his say- Get the flash. Oh, I say, I say, I say, John Claude, are you still running around doing things like a fool? Or what is a bit of him but a miserable little pile of secrets, you dang old fool? Somehow his accent didn't change. I would. I say, I say, John Luke, I travel the stars, I write, I write in a journal, I travel the stars, I was looking for that John Luke, that fallen Vogue, I know that one day one of these deliveries will bring me upon him and I will deliver him the death he so rightly deserves. I will find him, he will not elude me and I will bring him not to justice but to damnation. How does John Claude look right now in this moment? What is he wearing? I think, I think right now in this moment, uh, so he's still, so he's still quite big, but he's lying back, I think he's wearing a white short sleeve button down with a black tie and glasses on. 100% Glasses back on. Uh, and kind of just like, like standard slacks, shirt tucked in, black belts, kind of like non-descript black shoes. Uh, just like my, just like my everyday walking around outfit. Mild man, modern attorney. Mild manner, just a mild manner, pencil pushing and pushing the tunic. And I'll go with a vampire brother and I'll see him played to death. Do we know that's what happened to your brother? Uh, yeah, I think you would. I think I probably, at times would have like, largely, I think it would be known, uh, that I would be looking, ah, look out for the, for the Vogue, John Luke in case we come across and you see John's peel. We've never even seen a single Vogue in this laptop. Keep your eyes peeled everybody, I'm right in the tunnel. I think one day, one day I'll sniff him out. Grumbly you came to, you came to be sent on your nose just in case. I'll find him, John. I'll find that. Mr. Chaldeau Claire, I mean. Yeah, I'll find him. Must say I say, John Claude, if we finally meet, I will probably say something cool as hell as all who are damned must die so let us all die together. Or something of such similar persuasion. Well dang it. Persuasion, persuasion. Keep your eyes peeled. Just saying all the stuff while I look at cool, uh, words to say in response. Well he thinks of that. I would have been trying to play all of the really shitty like cheap emulator games that they keep crashing and the controller that I have that says angry dogs with these things. It has really bad joystick drift so I would be taking it apart and just trying to fix it and I like unscrewed it. But now I don't know how to put it back together and I'm just horribly broken in with it but I would be fumbling with this angry dogs controller. Grumbly, when you put it back together you're not supposed to have extra parts man. You're not supposed to go back in there. I don't know when it's when and I think I'm missing screws. Did you see these screws hold on? Let me. I'm scanning. Nobody move. Nobody move. Scanning. Scanning. Scanning. Oh it's gone. Are you just looking? It just bliped through them through the universe. I'll be honest with you I've never seen him take the helmet off. I don't know if it's a part of him or if he just is maybe losing his hair or something. I don't know. Oh that's so sad. Don't ask him about it though. Just don't bring it up. He's probably really sensitive. Yeah he is. He's a sensitive guy. Oh. Oh puss. I mean grumbling. Do not tell the dog that I have consumed it. It was delicious. I'm sorry what? I have consumed it. The screw? I get it. I crave more rusty metal. Bumble? But we're eating these delicious gummy asteroid clusters. I brought them for you and for me. They run out so fast. Just one bag and you're done with it. You're still hungry. I'd be in the cockpit with my feet up on the dash listening to one of Peggy's Mixed CDs and tossing a gummy asteroid up and one for me. One for you. One for me. One for you. I just can't buddy. Don't you? Oh heavenly. Perhaps we should co-pile it together with some jams. All right. Do you think you're better off alone indeed? Talk to me. Talk to me. I have a question. I gotta say, a lot of questions are daily first. You guys really get along. I'm in the car. I'm so new. Bumble is actually quite good company. So we can hear these conversations. Absolutely. He can talk to Hazel in her mind. But this is all public. The whispering of the screw was in her mind. What's the name of that big plant? Yeah, Audrey. Audrey too. Yeah. Okay. Very cool. Audrey too. From Little Shabba Harves. That was Audrey. What? Bitsy low bitsy. Having planted strategically the seed of curiosity in Booker's mind about what's inside of his filthy sack is... That's not my filthy sack. That's what I have. The one that he possesses at this time does what she always does on journeys like this. She sits in a large, massive rotating metal chair and she turns and stares out the window as Arcadia passes her by and she brews. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Because the hole back of the������������������� It's alright. Way to be baby. Be cool. The bag remains sealed. We've never opened one of your packages before. We're not going to start now. Peggy, my trusted technician. Yeah? Can you help me get into the computer again? Did you forget your email password? Can you clear off some of the computer? Oh no, I go thinking you're a computer guy. It's being very slow. What is the password on my AOL dot com? What's your mom's maiden name, Whiteboard? My mother? Did you capitalize it or not? She made such a great flush. Okay, okay. What's your first pet's name? Little Jimbo Jimothy. Was that, did you, two words? Did you capitalize any of that? Little Jimbo Jane Jimothy's Source of Involve. Jane Jimothy. That one's through. That one's through. What was the first one? My mother flushed him down the toilet. Well, that's not one of the questions. What was he? What was the making model of your first spaceship? He was a little strapping young ocelot. I don't know how to describe it. The strapping young ocelot? No, that was the wrong answer. The making model of your first spaceship. Ah yes. Oh, it was cherry red. Cherry red. No, that was wrong too. A real magnet for the sluss on the strip. What? Why? That was also wrong. Oh wait, what is that? What is it? A different kind of brain for that one. I remember it was the D nasty. D nasty. Can you get into my Lycos account? My yahoo. What was the last four digits of your social security number? Ah, 7, 8, X. Q. Yep, that worked. Alright, I'm in. What do you want your password to be now? Ah, oh, I. I? Ah, um, right brackets. Right brackets. You're never going to remember this. Right brackets? Three. Okay. Capital B. No, it's a less than 7. No, it's a less than 7. Case I. Wait, was the first I supposed to be uppercase? Let's start over. Let's start over. Yes, yes, yes. I. Okay. Less than sign. There we go. Less than sign, gotcha. Three. Three. Capital B. Capital B. Wait, was the I on the beginning? Look at his eye. Was the I on the beginning supposed to be uppercase? We got a start over. We got a start over. Alright, here we go. Here we go. We can do this time. Team effort. One. One. Gotcha. Yep. Signed, yep. Three. Mm-hmm. One. One, okay. Three. Three. One. One. Six. Six. Eight. You can't use your phone number in your password, Wygour. Zero. Alright. Zero. Mm-hmm. Eight. Five. Exclamation mark. Shit, I answered it without the exclamation mark. I just have to remember. Oh, well then let's start over. Okay, okay. Peg, I hate to ask you this, but why are you in there? The printer hasn't quite been working. If you could take a look at that too. Have you turned it off and on again? Nah, it's not really my thing, man. Just, you know, you like the computer guy. Just check out the, check out, check out the printer for us while you're in there, you know. You look like a computer guy. Yep, I gotcha. Okay. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Oh, no, speaking of computers, hey, Bitsy. Bitsy, I figured out what this memory card thing does. I'm playing skies of the regular material playing Galaxy. I found the memory card. There's like a little doodledock sidekick that's finding like potions and extra like little items and stuff that I can use in battles. What does this have to do with Bitsy? It was your dream cast and you said you didn't know how the memory card worked. I'm just saying, I'll figure it out. I sniffed it out. Nice job, friendly. Nice job. Good, you've unlocked the secrets of the dream cast. Wow. It is truly thinking. Wow, what, what, the dream cast is thinking? Yes, that's what I've been told. This dream cast thing, does this make a lot of notes? Like, do people buy this? Oh, yes, it's, it's... So the person who made this is really rich. Oh, yes, in this universe who's very successful. Do they have an email? I assume so. What is it? Just, just, what, what do you think it is? Help it dreamcast.com. Help it dreamcast.com, subject. Nellarian Prince needs your help. Hello, owner of the dream cast. And I'm going to write an email and send it off. Oh, yes. Can you get, can you get into the computer and make it faster and make it... Like inside of it? Yeah, it's slow. Well, you can get, you got all these tabs open, just, just close those tabs. Ah, I don't think it's a tabs bag. My monkey has got to do with their download of a bunch of old, old games. I think it's a game. Don't look like any games I've ever seen. Hold on, let me, let me take a look at this. Oh my God. Well, that one's mine. That one's mine. That one's mine. Oh, that one's mine, dude, that's a good one. How did you get all of this on here? It wasn't me, it was my dang old homunculus. Your dang old homunculus went to plaguerathotties.com? He's a whippersnapper. Oh, yes, lost purpose embarrassing moments. No, none of that. Okay, so two days ago when you clicked on fat rats, phatrats.com, sign up now for Fat Rats near me. Next time you think of making a homunculus, don't do it. They're gonna clog up your computer with games and slow it down. And take search history as you yourself will never possibly entertain. Have we ever met you in a monkey as Mr. Weigel? Oh, I'm sure you've seen him scapering around. He's back in the lab. Well, then how did he go to these questionable websites 15 minutes ago? Oh, because he teleports or something. Oh, boy. You never make a teleporting device with a computer. I'm like, what is this? He's like, put one of your own cloud brains. Oh, yeah. Teleporting is way cooler than remote access, and then... I should have kept him in the flask. After he yearned for all of the souls of Xerxes, I should have known he was no good. No one looked in the bag, did they? Nobody looked in the bag. Rules of drive, because the rules of drive indeed. Yes, that's right. I know it's your favorite film. We'll watch it if this is all successful. We'll have a wonderful victory viewing of drive. And we promised discreet packaging. And discreet billing. How does it show up on the report when we build them? It shows they was watching random fucking billboards. Oh, that makes sense. That'll obscure it, for sure. Do you want more chow garden, Booker? The print is working again. Well, I'm like, that's beautiful. Oh, it's Brook, you begin. That's the old print. I told you to uninstall the software, install the new print of software. We're on the 3000 now, not the 200. Ah, yes. Oh, I... No, that's Solitaire. Close that. Hold on, hold on. Let me go to my library again. Ah, yes, using Ask G's for dummies. I think it's pronounced Ask G's. Ask G's.com for dummies. Let me just read this 500 page tome. It certainly isn't a scam for the elderly. He turns on his computer and you hear, All right. Ah, you got it. No, I think that was your messaging app. Me? Yeah. Huh? Ah, I hope we're there soon. How close are we, Mr. Weigol? Oh, fuck, he's right over there. Oh, shit. Booker, look. He's looking this way over there. All right, Hazel, nice work. There's your... I'm gonna skip it. As you see, you see the grey ash and clouds and ridges of volcanoes that are shooting these polygonal, low-poly, fiery bowlers into the air and they crash down in all... in perfect arcs and perfect symmetry. As you see this massive, almost like a sea of fire, with great big fireballs that shoot up and then crash down perfectly and shoot up and crash down perfectly. And you see that it's true that this massive castle that's rising up on precariously on this big stone in the center of this lake of lava has dozens, maybe hundreds of cannons that are pointed in every direction. It almost looks like it's more cannon than castle at this point. And you see that they're all pointed to the sky. They're not pointed down as there is just a long, long, long, long, long, miles long bridge. It's almost like anachronistically, like serpents pass from Avatar the Last Airbender. This incredibly long, narrow bridge across this massive lake of lava as you see that you're getting warnings flaring as you see, you're very far off now, a couple miles, but you see that all of the cannons are facing in your direction. You feel like you might need to take it down. I'm just going to hit mute on that one. Ooh, talk to all kind of a lot. Better off alone has been a loop for three hours. Better off alone. Remind me to burn that to a C-D-R-W. In case I've changed my mind. Wow, a W. They know what they signed up for. This is for us. Oh, man. Hey, Bumble, we better take it down, OK? OK, OK, slow. Terrain, terrain, pull up. Terrain, terrain, pull up. Where did you learn to fly? Thank you in the dance floor. I was born flying. I just came out like this. You're doing a great job. Thanks. This is really only like the second or third time I've done it. It's my pleasure. All right. So things are looking pretty bad out there. So we should... I don't know. I don't really know what to do. I just fly the plane. Should we just like cross over the bridge and just walk straight up to it? Like, he wants this delivery, right? Oh, that is an excellent idea, Peggy. If you wanted to get blown to sleep... Wait a minute. How come I'm not your top friend on your MySpace page? You got Grumly over here. You got Booker. You got Hazel. He's got Bitsy on him. What are you saying, Peggy? Is that where the list ends? Yeah. I made that username like a really long time ago. Why do I want my... I'm not on your page at all? Oh, that's obnoxious. I'm gonna give... Damn that! I'm gonna remove it from your MyPath. I also changed my song to ChumbleWub. I told you to chumbleWub. I said I'd say you changed your song to ChumbleWub. I was gonna remove you from your family circle. You're top friends? Foul Violoculus. Oh, that's obnoxious. Oh, when I get my hands around that, teleporting to Moculus. You should have left me the desert sands of Xerxes. It wasn't gonna suit all those songs. I can't think of two more vile acts back to back. Oh, come on. No. I mean, forget about the Xerxes, man. That's like, probably fine. I don't even know what that is. But removing me from MySpace? That's what that's about. Honestly, no, it's the Chumble Wumber. I've never been cut so deep. I'm so parched from raging. I'm going to slake my thirst with a cool, refreshing taste of Ghex Soda. Oh, Mr. Wago, refreshing. If your homunculus is still looking for all the souls of Xerxes, I could maybe help him out. I'll be having to hunt him down, sniff him out. You can sniff out and hunt down souls? Well, I mean, I've never done it before, but I feel like with my cybernetic enhancements, including from my level three subclass feature, my scanning enhancements, finding all of the souls of Xerxes will be simple. You know, I think you can do anything you put your mind to, Grumly. I believe in you. I think he can do it as well. The souls of a very specific smell. That's exactly right. And for only one note to can, it doesn't break the budget to get great taste, refreshment and the boost of energy. Oh, I could use that in one of my emails. Ah, yes, refreshing Ghex Soda. With just one note, you two could save the life of this bitling. Look at how sad it looks in this cell here dying. Just one note. We can pay rent again on the layer with that sponsorship, I just did. Could we all have a Ghex Soda? No! We are way too expensive. Do you know how expensive these things are? I thought you said they're one note. You just announced loudly the price when you said these don't grow on trees and will come out of your paycheck. Sean Claude, that sounds like fraud. What are you going to say about that? Yeah, no, I mean that definitely sounds like fraud. In the deal when we got it drafted up, didn't they send you like sample Ghex Soda? Or they just sent you the one for the scene? They sent some pallets of... A pallet of them? Where's the pallet? You're going to show ya. I mucked you. Is that name fucking it? I said I said it. Oh, it's Hainous's list of Grums. Number one, remove me from your My Five, family five. Number two, that other thing he did. Number three, steal him the pallet of Ghex. Number four, something else probably that'll come up later. And then number five, the souls of Zerx, he's on there somewhere. Well, I think we're going to have to have like a team meeting here soon about this immunculous situation because this is not good working conditions. You can really stick with that guy. I should probably just un-make him. You can do that? Can you do that? Very easily. It would be barely an inconvenience. Seems like it would solve like 80% of your problems. Why do you think I keep all of that toxic ooze in the dungeon? All I need is to pull up a barrel and stash him by the scruff and then slowly lower him into it as he squirms and looks terrified. He'll be dissolved instantly. Can I record that from in the arms of an angel? And we'll just record it and he can be behind bars. Oh, bars. Bars? How are we going to do that? I don't know. Don't you have bars? We can take apart the Iron Maiden. To the dungeon. No, we're not right there. Ah, yes, the dungeon. Oh, God. Ah, yes. The dungeon. You can take a note out of my paycheck. I'm just very thirsty. You've got a paycheck? Oh, we get paid, don't we? How else are we going to afford that shit in six ways? So he makes me an appointment. Yes, you all enjoy it very meager, but legal paycheck. And finally, it's no leave of the lost of what he did. It just doesn't keep up with inflation. It's true. It was one of them. Legally, he doesn't have to. Legally, he doesn't have to. Most of my paycheck goes back to renting my uniform. Oh, yes. You pay for that? Yeah, it doesn't come with pants. No. You pay for that every time? Yeah, don't you? You don't disown it? No, I owe my clothes. Oh. Well, I've just come to like it so much now. Ring, ring. Yep. Okay, just click on the button that says, Allow access to computer. Okay, yep. Now, type in your username and password. Yep. Yep. Your last four digits of your social. Okay, now go to transfer entire balance. Yep. No, that's going to fix it right up. You'll be able to get into email now. Thank you, Kathy. Bye. Now, that was definitely fraud. Did you just rob somebody? Did you just fraud rob somebody? I'm doing technical work. Over the phone. I have a second job. That wasn't identity theft, was it? Peggy. I don't know. Is my name Kathy? Oh, my goodness. Oh. Oh, yes. That's also what I thought it was, bro. That's what I thought it was, buddy. I got sworn somewhere in our contracts that we agreed to not have multiple jobs. We have contracts? I haven't checked the buy laws. The anti-moonlighting clause. Because I have a phobia of werewolves. You too? Ah, yes. We never know where the werewolves are going to show up. They're not even cared into the setting. That makes them extra scary. That does make them scary. There wouldn't be one here, right? Certainly not. Oh, I hope not. Unless it's a lava werewolf. Oh. Oh, those are things. Ah, yes. Sometimes they run out of budget, so they just need to take a mob from another level and just recolor it red. They call it a lava werewolf. Oh. I can't imagine a sated hearted bone depict would do that. He definitely seemed like the kind of employer of NPCs that would have all the unique ones. Not just steal them from other places and just paint them red. We used to call them old sated hearted bone depict back in college. He really earned that moniker. What a good guy. Ah, yes. Well, I suppose we've landed now unless Hazel's about to kill us all in terrible flame tragedy. So is podcast we're talking about for years to come. No, no, we're here, we're here. Ah, yes. Oh, thank goodness. I have a phobia of space travel. I'll smack a big red button on the side. Sounds so familiar. Why, God, did you know that space flight is the safest way to travel? Oh, God, I thought I was going to have a hot card deck event. You see, he opens his rope, he pulls out like a goofy red mechanical heart. Ah, no, we're fine. When the screws falls out. Well done, Hazel. I always knew that hiring your famous flying skills would always give us to our destination. You know anyone notice how when you're in the volcano level, it gets really silent? Oh, thank God. Oh, no, it's the new stage music. It's not quite as spooky as normal level though. I feel like it's done, done, done, done. Oh, we're out of time. We just landed. Oh, you're right. Oh, you're right. This is just the music for when the hatch door goes down and then we can all, you know, jovially walk out onto the platform and then the music changes. This is like the gummi ship theme when we're flying on a waggle. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have you got the bag? Oh, yeah. Have you looked in it yet? No, we're not going to look in it. It's not what we do. Well, you know, we don't have to open it. We could hold a flashlight up to it. We offer confidentiality and a smooth delivery. Yes, you would never want to look inside the bag. Not even a glimpse. Why are you looking at me like that? Look at me. You like what? What if we just looked and then we didn't tell anyone that it would still be confidential? No, no, no, no. It would still be within the circle of trust. We would be breaking the contract. Thank you. Tell them, Jean-Claude. Yeah, I'll say it. I'll say it. We can't break contracts. That's just bad business. Why can't you break contracts? Well, because then we wouldn't get our reputation with Tank. We wouldn't get respectful clients like St. Narthibona-Pack. But St. Narthibona-Pack and on his malevolent magma layer. His name isn't Bonapig. Well, I don't know what he is up to in the summer of his own home. He may have heard several monikers in his time in college with the YGOR. I am a little insane. And we're certainly not judging. Yeah, we're certainly not judging. I'm really a different kind of new game, baby. I feel strongly that we should look in the right just... No. I mean, but... I mean, you know how the boss is. That could have been as lunchy-handed you for all we know. What if we deliver the wrong thing? Well, that's not our problem. They can take it up a lot of employer. Yeah, but you know who he's going to take it up with? You know what they say. If you don't tell anyone you did it, it basically never happened. It's exactly right. Everything we know about this guy, I think he'd find that situation to be very reasonable and give us the opportunity to fix it. So why would I do that? I'm not worried all about it. I'm not worried all about it. This guy's saving it. Ah, damn it! I won't stand for this anymore. Absolute treason and heresy. See, Ron, you see that YGOR is in the computer. This damn YGOR is kissing up to me. I can't just tell the nonsense. What? How am I supposed to know? There's no fucking way! I'm trying to tell him how. I creep up next to YGOR and I whisper into his ear. Do you wish to know the secret of escaping the Yeti? Well, yeah, tell me. Okay, so... He has these hypnotic circles in his eyes as he's talking a bit. Only now do you understand that there's a boost meter and if you just hold shift, you can get away from it for a brief second. What? You don't even do that? Shift? That's not fucking obvious. They don't even know you're dead. No, no, no, they don't tell you at all. Just as though... Why would it not be space sport? Because there's just many secrets. Shift? That's a load of horseshit. They should have told you that in a tutorial or at least in the fucking manual. Now you know the truth. Oh, I was talking about the Yeti. I suppose we should make our delivery. Ah, you know what? You, I trust my crew. I'm gonna stay here and try to outsmart this Yeti. Well, you all make your delivery. You remember what control you're supposed to hold down for running faster, right? Ah, yes. Laughed holes. All right. Close enough. You can count on us, Mr. Wargo. We'll deliver this package in one piece and we certainly won't look inside. You have a what? Detective's honor. Yeah, we're not gonna look inside. He said we're not gonna look inside. You have a word. You say you're gonna look inside. No, no. I think we're not gonna look inside. You were doing a fucking right thing. Did I hear the words, look inside? No, you're not wrong. You're not wrong, Mr. Wargo. We're not gonna look inside. I had a dream. I had a dream that someone would open the bag while I was at freezing. And then the plane crashed and there was a tidal wave. So just hypothetically, what would happen if someone were to open the bag and look inside? We would violate Siacool Express' golden rule. See? What's the golden rule? Don't ask questions. We don't look at the bag. The same rules as Triumph, like Ryan Gosling. Remember, it's a cool movie with a cool lead and Wygo wants to be literally him. And I would have no choice but to solve the business. Fire you off. Oh, oh. All right, all right. Peggy, Peggy. You made room on the apartment, Peggy. Who said we were gonna open the bag? We need to pay for everything. And then I had to do the full top of my loan and my Hamunculus would give it all. Why did you put him in the wheel? No, I mean, I just, I borrowed a lot of money from my Hamunculus. And my only collateral is the business and my evil leg. He made a lot of questionable decisions here. How's your Hamunculus making money? So much money that you could borrow from him. I mean, once you consume all of the souls of Xerxes. It's really quite simple. You don't have to be coverage after that for what you can do. Your Hamunculus has all the accumulated wealth of Xerxes. Oh, they don't need it anymore. He's got the souls. There have been others. There will always be others. We will endure this. We will survive. They survived the rent situation? The Hamunculus inherited all our ships. Oh. What he's saying. That's not gonna be good. His Hamunculus has all of the accumulated wealth of Xerxes. And the souls as well. Allegedly. And that's the least of his crumbs. Why goers Hamunculus at AOL.com. This is gonna be a really rough one. All right. We should... 201 million notes in taxes. We must begin our journey. Come on. Are we ready to go? Exactly as I arranged. The journey may be long. It may be dangerous. And I am a little hungry because those giant balls of fire exploding out of their volcano look like meatballs. Oh man, I do. Yeah, they do look like meatballs. But we will make it through. Why did those big bullets have faces on them? Oh, they're kind of charming. Oh, they're awfully angry though. Yeah. Oh. Like I want to get close to it, but then I want to go away from it too at the same time. I really hope this guy was living someplace kind of invited. And maybe a beach tropical sort of resort kind of style. Hasn't happened to us yet. Maybe the next one. Maybe the next one. There's always the next one. All right, let's go then. Not the payload. You know it. Follow me. Right behind you, buddy. So what do you think's in that bag? Oh, shit this guy. Question. What's in the bag? Do we start with any tokens? Oh, yes. Yes. How many? I would say that we start with... I would say sort of three. Oh, wow. I have a three sided guy. We start with tokens. I, as we're leaving the ship, I would like to use one of my species traits. Wow. I would like to, as a magic action, I would like to use checkpoint. You may expend a token you're carrying to create a shimmering checkpoint on a surface you touch. The checkpoint lasts until you finish a long rest or until you use his axe again. Until, while you and the checkpoint are on the same plane of existence, you can take a magic action to teleport to the point, appearing in its space or the closest unoccupied space. When you teleport, you can expend a token to bring a willing creature you touch with you. Wow. Okay, so I'll, I'll, in this spot, I will hold up my token, which is a gorgeous looking digital pork chop on a bone, and it will expend into the air as I create a checkpoint on the ground. So then, if anything goes horribly, horribly wrong, I can teleport back to it. I'm inspired to have a similar ritual. Bitsy will walk over to her large metal intimidating chair, and on the side, there is a small box getting very close to the box you might hear at. And she'll, she'll, she'll look around, making sure that no one can observe, and then she'll open it, and her face will be bathed in yellow light like John Travolta in fiction when he opens the briefcase, and she will place an object inside and then close the box, and I will also use checkpoint in existence. Okay, use checkpoint. Is there anyone else using checkpoint on the show? I, yes, I think that is probably wise. It costs a token. One token. So I will expend one of my three tokens, and I'm down to two. And the way that I would use this magic action, though, is that I would take some time to play my saxophone and fill this, the white gorgopter with beautiful jazz, as, and then you would see one of my tokens, which is a golden musical note, slowly come out of the end of the saxophone as it inscribes itself on surface of the ship. Checkpoint? Oh, I should have needed, I'll be able to sniff this back out if I need to. Brony, Brony, are you sure? Because last time you didn't want to use a checkpoint either, and you remember what happened. Yeah, but like... Well, that was just one time. I think this time is going to be different. We rebuilt him. Just one time, Brony. Just one time? You would be able to... You put more legs back on, it was okay. I'm just worried about you, buddy. All right, hey, hey, your tokens. Your tokens. I'm just saying. Well, like, maybe we could kind of share tokens, and so like, if the three of you already have checkpoints, and you could just share a token with your good buddy, hey, so we'll bring you back, huh? I'll say that's an interesting idea, Hazel. However, I have some other really cool stuff to do with tokens, so I don't know if I'll be able to... Well, we will see if you are proven... If you don't want to share, you can just say... Well, as I say, it's not about wanting to share, it's just about wanting to do a lot of other really cool stuff. Probably at some point. Fine. I think we'll figure it out, you know, maybe, you know... Yeah, why not? We'll spend the token. I'll spend a token to save Hazel if things go, you know, the wrong way. And then I'll say you! Oh, I think that was the wrong way! No, it'll never happen. How are you gonna spend the token to save Hazel? I read my feature, it's how it works. Oh, I was supposed to listen to you? No, no, no, I wasn't the one reading it, I read it to myself, like a responsible bitler. Well, can you read it again? No. I'm gonna hack into Booker and make him read it again. Ooh! Ha! Oh, yeah, you can take someone with you when you teleport, a willing creature. Well, Booker, you could also take me with you. Oh, you know, probably makes a good point. Yeah, but I'm lighter and I bring snacks. You guys have multiple persuasion checks. Oh, I'm on the case. I'm on the case. 15. Oh! 10. Oh, baby! Yes! I'm taking one of the cards. I'm taking one with me. That's how that works. Best buddies forever. Oh, right. I'll say Hazel if we get into a sticky situation, I'll teleport you. No, no, I feel guilty about it. You just didn't need to be nice. No, don't feel guilty. Well, yeah, exactly, that's correct. I'll whip my butter around and you'll see my jammy kind of sticky tail like mark a shape onto the side of the ship. It'll look like the outline of a cupcake and from that it will kind of congeal and float outward and it will be like a little picture icon of the Kirby cupcake. You mean smurbie? That's right. I mean, literally distinct smurbie. Yeah, we definitely have a reference to that. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. And it'll go, whee! You say it's in the 64, you can't say Kirby. Yeah, exactly right. Smurbie. Smurbie. I don't want it to sound like... Kirby, shurbie. Oh, there's... Oh, there's... I have the flat chip put on this ship. Or BK. Serve me well and you will be permitted to survive. Oh, you're going to take me with you if shit gets real. It's my token. Yeah. Okay. All right. Wait, before we leave, I must go through my checklist to make sure that my Gruff McScruff fan club detector's bag is stuck in back and ready to go. Oh, that's adorable, Grumly. Yeah, keep going, do it. Traveling clothes. Check it out. Power cells three checked. Personal communicator checked. Medic's kit checked. Dice set checked. Wait, is that not sure about that laugh? Why are you confused? Don't you know it's in the bag? You sound surprised by that. I'm a young and gumptious detective, need to anyway. Engineers tools checked. Cosmic symbol checked. Combat knife checked. Synth line checked. Brassens pouches 10 checked. Private check ignited check. Flashlight check canteen. Brass spikes. Rucksack check. Burst can. Oh, what is giving those away? Oh, check. Can I guess that it's just the Super Nintendo like blaster? Like the Duck Hunt gun. It is chunky. No, wait, before checking out all the stuff everybody got their combat knife. Oh, I do. Oh, yeah. Now as you mentioned. Can we all do this? I do have a combat knife. Can everybody fuck the fucking dog? Combat knife. Oh my. It was supposed to leave that at home. That was the other knife. Oh, the homunculus guy, you too. Oh, no. It's homunculus. He's down, dear. Watch out. And everyone of us has a lot of pistol, correct? Oh, no. I don't need a lot of pistol. Holy crap, you're right. I have a gun. Oh, god, that's awesome. Combat pistol from inside my head. I cheers you for the reward. I'll say Scruff McGruff gives you Scruff. Oh, look at this. Scruff McGruff. Scruff McGruff, get it right, John. Scruff McGruff. My apologies. I don't need a lot of pistol. I have a burst cannon. All right, let's go. Let's go. I will take a lead and I will use my scanning as my eyes will sort of flash and you'll see various scanning symbols going across my visor as I proceed and look for dangers. All of you make your way down out of the Waagor. Okay, don't die, say hi to the Satan on a boat. Don't ask him about his family. Just translate. All right, you fucking yeddy. You step into the... You step down off of the Waagor copter as the landing platform closes behind you. As you see the volcanoes, the heat is oppressive and you all see this massive thin bridge that's up ahead as you see this enormous looming castle off in the distance. And once again, you see the huge belching volcanoes. In perfect intervals, not random, methodically belching out these huge meatball looking fire bulls that then crash down, occasionally crashing onto the bridge itself. You see the fire erupting out of the lava crashing back in and you see the strange rippling in the lava. It almost acts like water in this low poly volcanic level. You see that before you? What do you all do? I also turn and I see an Italian human, a plumber man. And you'd think that if he hit the lava, he would go, oh, like that. But instead he goes, oh, oh my God, I feel everything. I burned. Jesus. Where did that come from? Oh my God. I really changed the tone of everything. Oh, I'm so alive. I'm so alive. I wish I wasn't. Oh, pathetic. We can't get involved in that. I mean, I think we should throw rocks at his head and kill him faster. Put him out of his misery. Oh my God. My bones. My bones are burning. We're going to help him. Are you a detective always? No. No, no, no, no. We're a job to do. We're a job to do. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.���������� I'm just a good starter's human, I'm not even a big lady. I mean, they really should put a sign at the door. I'm sorry none of us could fly, otherwise we could come get you. I'm so sorry. I fly out, I look down, yeah it's really unfortunate and I throw a rock. Oh what's that even, no! The love bill I think you call for now! He has a big white glove, it's a steam with marinara sauce as it goes down. Ah, wow. His bloodline is ended. Did you see that rock slide that happened on the side? That was crazy. Oh brother, I told that guy not to try to get over there and it was a doom and he didn't listen to me. As you hear voice. Who are you? Where'd you come from? You see a bitling like yourself, but he is a shrew. He's dressed in an oversized baggy shirt, a backwards baseball cap, and big sneakers. Oh me, I'm just the nevus of an overlord truck bar, I'm a shriek the shrew. You see this shrew bitling and he's got his nose. It's my destiny to take out an overlord truck bar and collect all of the shriek coins. You're his nemesis? Just so I'm understanding this correctly you're his nemesis. He's my nemesis but I haven't been able to get across that damn bridge. Oh so you haven't even gotten past the first difficulty. No I'm out of tokens, I need more shriek coins. What do you like him? What do you do? He's just the big old boss of that castle, he's holding on to all my shriek coins. I know there's shriek coins in there. Wait you want to defeat our client? I'm trying to, he's the big evil boss of Arcadia. I think we need to take him down and return to the municipality, to democracy. What does he look like? He's a horrible reptilian abomination. He's spawned from the hell itself. Listen I don't really want to get too involved with all of that. We just have to make a delivery. If you want to defeat this guy after we finish our delivery you be our guest. Well can you spare a token? No. I'm not going to use a token. No, no, no. No, no, no. I'm not about a shriek coin. I say Gruff Mcscruff say about strangers. He's just always helped strangers. No, he does all the things they call you. He's getting a white van Grumley. Is Gruff Mcscruff wearing a trench coat? I don't know if he's scrumptious about drugs in general. Is he wearing an outfit that implies he's some sort of official? He's always wearing a very long trench coat. You never see what he's wearing underneath. But he's got a hat as well. That is disastrous. He's a friendly boy. Forget about that guy. That guy's a bum. He's from space Chicago. Space little noise. I'll give you this one. No, you're not going to give this guy a token after he just spoke about you here. Do you know about Gruff Mcscruff? He's from space Chicago. Space little noise. Yeah, I've seen him on the TV. Can I have one of the kinds? I've got one too. What do you have to maybe trade? I've got nothing. I can't cross the bridge because I'm out of tokens. Keep in mind that this guy's calling Mcscruff the bum. He's got nothing to trade. Hold on. Hold on. We need a coin to get across the bridge. Oh, well, no. I'm out of shrink coins. I'm out of shrink coins. Now you see that bridge? That's awful and scary. If I just could make it to that castle, I'd know I'd got a whole heap of shrink coins in there. Why don't you just walk? Just go. Oh, and I would be able to save the beautiful Dutchess Shriegela. She's the girl one. Oh my God. Hold on. If you're a proper Gruff Mcscruff fan, do you know his theme song? Oh, I think I know. I think I know what it was in the talk to me. Ooh. He called Mcscruff a bum. Of course he doesn't know the theme song. If you can sing it with me. Ooh. If you can sing his theme song with me, I'll give you a token. Do you think you're better off? No. No. No. Come on. I love this song. I love Mcscruff. It's basically how you want to know it's a good song. I don't know. Come on. Just one token. I just need a couple shrink coins. I don't want people to say the Shriegela. Can we all be in agreement that this guy does not get a single token prize? I don't know. I'm feeling convinced. I would love to know what Hazel's tail has to say about this guy. My tail's currently bobbing along and singing with him. He has good taste in music, but he could be so delicious. It was kind of a long flight. Feast of shrews. As tasty as a lamprey pie. Delectable hair. Guys, I've seen that look before. I'm fascinated about with Shriegela coins. I'll tell you what, we'd better give this guy a coin and get going. He's going to get it. Hazel is bumble saying that we should take him into the castle and fatten up over Shriegela coins so that you can together consume him and gain his powers. It's unclear, but that guy's going to get it if we don't get moving. Shriegela, why don't you just stay here? We'll go ahead and make our delivery and then when we leave, maybe I'll give you a token. If you find any Shriegela coins with you that will bring them out and then I'll take out an old trunk bar like it's my destiny to finally save Shriegela. I just get it. No token? Find y'all in the world. I'm not going to tell you about the horrible thing that lives in the lake. I'm out of here. As he walks away. Hold on, if you have information to exchange, maybe for a good horrible monster in the lake level story I might be able to give you a token. Wow. That's a good question. Now you didn't say no things. Well, I don't tell people nothing unless I get a Shriegela coin for it. Why didn't you just say that? Well, no, no, we can't just give you the coin up front. What promise is this? You're not going to run. You're going to give us half the story first and then we pay you the coin and then you finish the story. But yeah, your logic is there but I'm not sure that helps us. He'll just tell us to use us half and then fuck off with our token. It's a good point you got, yeah. You guys are wasting my time. I think I can find maybe some Shriegela coins over there by that lava dumpster. Okay. Hold on, hold on. When we look over is there a green dumpster filled with lava? Absolutely. Okay, thank you. This is just a clarifier. He walks over to it. I'm taking it there's nothing. Can I tell if he is being honest? Make an inside check. Seven. I mean, he looks really, I mean, he seems like he's really looking for a coin. He seems so honest. You believe him? Believe him about Shriegela and that trying to defeat Trog. Trog Barr for what you call it, for democracy or something. I don't know. But I'm going to be honest with you. His story just doesn't add up to me. Well, I just feel like what if there is information and it's more than just a piece of information and it's my duty as a detective to chase down any lead that we can. Just give him one of your coins. Let's go. All right. Hold on. I'm going to walk up to Shrieg. What do you do? Now listen to me. My friend over here is considering giving you one of his tokens. But if you betray us or you emit on information, you'll have the wrath of Bitsy on your head and I can bring pain upon you that could last for generations. Do you understand me? I'm going to use befriend on him as I talk. And because I use my origin feet name drop, I have advantage on any charisma checks to influence another person's decisions. Oh, sorry. It's not a spell. It's a wisdom saving throw. I'm using the spell, but my background also gives me the name drop. I'm doubling up. Yeah. I'm doubling up. What's your background? My background is the aristocrat. Oh. I was once a member of a powerful family and my origin feet gives me some benefits including skill proficiencies, but specifically name drop. When I leverage my own name, I have advantage on charisma checks to influence another person's decisions. So I'm using the name drop and I'm also casting befriend to try and charm this humanoid for up to one minute. If he fails my wisdom saving throw, my spell save DC is 15. I rolled a nine. So I stare at him with my yellow eyes rimmed with red. What are you saying? How do you say it? My friend is considering giving you this token, but if you emit any information and you don't give us everything that we want to know, you will experience pain beyond pain. And what is the effect of befriend? You will be charmed by me. You essentially go from indifferent to friendly. Wow. You got a nice voice. I'm intimidating him into. And I think we have advantage on persuasion checks. On persuasion checks. On charisma checks. So I need you to make a persuasion check at advantage. I will happily do so with two of my d20s. I'm going to use the advantage d20s. That's going to be an actual 20. Wow. So the total comes to 25. 25. Okay. I was originally just going to take the shriek coin and then bamf out of your back to buy a respawn point, but I'll tell you what I know if I give this one shriek coin. You can give him the shriek. Oh, whispery what? You can give him the shriek coin to learn what we must learn, though he does seem under seasoned. What did he just say about bamfing out of here once I give him bamfing? Bamfing. Wow, wow, wow, wow. I'm just going to get... Okay. I'm clear. Just so you know, you better not teleport away back to your checkpoint. If I give this to you, okay? The master whisperer's a doctor's seismic command. I'm here. Stay here. Oh, she spreeks with a voice as beautiful as Shriella. Shriella. This place is your tomb. You will be buried here. I will be buried here with all of the rest. In a little Satan heart his bone depict this movie castle. Yes. With many skeletons in the closet. Yes, so many skeletons. Tell us more. Tell us everything you know. There are hundreds of skeletons in every... there's hundreds of skeletons in every closet. In and in the castle. It's a lot of skeletons. I've been saving up and I only have three digi bones. And there's a battle bash for a game that's coming out that I'm really excited for. I think it's going to be my main new game. It has like this, this like really awesome like science fiction theme. It's called Concord and I'm going to play it for years and years. Oh, oh. And I really want to afford the battle pass and I might have to save up more if I give you this. It'll be around forever. Here you go. Oh, crumly. I don't know. Wow. Wahoo! A shrink coin! You see as he takes it and it goes from a digi bone into his hand and levitates like Pac-Man's taunt and Super Smash Brothers. And then it immediately shifts to a big goofy coin with his face smiling on it. I got a shrink, a dumb shrink coin. All right. But now... Yeah, you'll make good on your promise. There is a beast, a blockchomper in the lava. It seeks to destroy the bridge and devour those who cross it. Old seated heart and bone depict keeps vile pants and skeletons in his closet. Ask anything else that doesn't know the secret of like defeating it to beating it. What is this blockchomper's secret? Tell us, tell us now. Do not try to hide behind anything with structural integrity. You must bait it away from the stone and the wood of the lava and you will also have to dodge all of the flying fireballs. Oh, fuck. That's very useful. Yeah, well... Put that down, Drunk Dog. Yeah, well, yeah, well, yeah. But does the fireballs don't stand behind anything with structural integrity? Where should we stand? Just a riggedy bridge here. If we take the bridge, is it going to pop out of the lava down there? Is there somewhere we could go if we could fight it on? Where should we fight it? Just stay to the side and hope you kill it before it destroys the bridge. And just to be clear, we can't just run really, really fast. Dang. No, it will catch up. Ah, shit. There's a little bit of blood running down his nose. And out of his ears and his eyes. Oh, man. All right. Well... When the passing moment, he become more my servant, Shriek. What does the man speak? Now that I got a Shriek cut. Oh, I always forgot. Halfway down, if you take the hidden ladder on the left side of the bridge, you will find the secret shark, Shrews Blumbo. Oh, this huge news. It's not Shrews Blumbo. It's not Shrews Blumbo. Well, you can't find those just anywhere. Right down here. Oh, wait, I have a detective's pad. I will write it down. Wait, where? I can read your pad and that's my account, man. We're on an investigation. You're probably using a mechanical pad, Shrews. What's a blumkin? Shark Shrews. I don't think that's how you spell Shark Shrews. Blumbo. Ah, there's another B in there. That B is very important. All right. What now, my mistress of the night? Betsy, is he supposed to be bleeding like that? What's going on? He's fine. He's done a twitch a little. I'm like, running my hands through his hair. My tail will come up and just take a little lick. Savor the shrew. Blumbo. He starts to eat his tail. He eats his shrew tail. Oh. Seek freedom and you become a captive of your own desire, Shriek. Seek discipline and find your liberty. I don't know what that means, brother. He is weak-minded. We can leave him. I think we've gotten everything that we're going to learn from this one. Thank you, Shriek. Good luck in killing the guy, whatever you're doing. Should we just dump him over the edge? No, no, no. Let him go. He's suffering. Let him go. You may go. Okay. I got a Shriek. Tell Shriek I think she's mighty fine. I like a little smooch. I got to go over to the lava dumpster. I think my tail's gone. You look as tail's gone. The Bumbleberry feeds a mubble. A mousse-bouche. You see him kind of waddle over and he kind of stands and he faces, it's like the Blair Witch Project and he's just standing. That's fine. It'll probably go back. What was that? I think Betsy cooked his brain. Bring me more. We're hot on the case. We've learned everything that we can. There's a creature known as a block tamper and we need to avoid stone or wood or something. I mean to be fair, we didn't have a chance with the girl anyway. He said that he was five feet tall on his dating profile. True enough. True enough. Let's actually advertise for Shrieks. Not for you, buddy. All right. Let us proceed and keep an eye out for the Shard Shrieks Blumbo. We have to go down the ladder to the side of the bridge. We've got to get to the bridge first. Avoid the structural integrity. Die to the fireballs. No big deal. It's another bet. Oh shit, it's right over there. It's way across the bridge. It's on the left. No, no, no. Halfway through on the left. Why don't you want a tourney? Well, gosh, that's a cross as hell. Now I use them up in. Halfway through on the left, Shard Shrieks Blumbo. I'll have to give you gruff miscruffs, latest copy of Bloodhound Monthly, so that you can brush up. John Codd. Well, maybe we'll only take better notes. All right. Follow me. All right, but move quick, all right? I'm scanning as you walk across. Okay, you're scanning. How does that work? I just have advantage on perception and investigation. Okay. Perception's good. Perception. As I turn away from Shriek, knowing that I've done my work, I'll pull my hood up and there will be almost a sheen of smoke. And I will turn, and I will use my Shadow Armor, casting Mage Armor on myself without expending a Spell Slot, one of my subclass features, boosting my AT to 16. The Shadow Tongue. Of the Shadow Tongue, exactly correct. Delightful. You all make your way, and the heat of this moat is oppressive. As you know, it's going to be a long journey. As you see all from the distance, some sort of shining, glittering thing along the bridge, you're not sure what it is. It's almost like a mirage to the hot it is. And you make your way across, grumbling, because you're at the lead and you're at advantage. Make a perception check at advantage. Hmm. I'll have a more higher than a 10 in two months. No, you have not. It is crazy. This is ridiculous. Thirteen. Thirteen. You make your way. As you look around, this is big mode of lava. As you're walking and walking, as the castle, you swear, like it should be getting closer. But it is, it is almost like it's getting closer, it's getting further away. And you keep going and the heat is so unbelievable, the oppressive. I think everyone has made a constitution saving job. As the fire blasts out around you. Oh, I'll see you next year. Oh, no. I'm not good at this. Oh, hey, I think I am. Come on. No more. Ah, thirteen. Uh-oh. Eighteen. I'm wearing heavy robes. I get a three. Okay. Sweating for my suit. Oh, wait, hold on. Fifteen. So I'm adding here. Everyone's got below a thirteen. Okay, hold on. I got a twenty. Thirteen. Thirteen. Oh, I squeezed by. I squeezed by. All right, no level of exhaustion. All it is, it's very easy, it's minus one to all the twenty tests. And your movement is reduced by five. That's it. Oh, so I'm back to normal. Minus two. Yeah, it should be two, four, six. Oh, minus two. I believe. Four, six, eight. Whatever it is. Are those for rules for 5.5e? That's right, 5.5e. Yeah. Uh, it's, yes, rules are reduced by two times your exhaustion level. You walk by, you walk, and you hear, Hey, help me, help me. But because you don't even notice them. Oh! You all... Didn't you hear that? Like on the whisper. All right, all right, all right. I'll say it could be the block chomper. Don't fall in love with him, do it. Block chompers on the wind. Steve, it's... You look, yeah, you all right? You're looking a little sweaty. Surely we'll find that short... You're panting more than usual, Grumly. Are you okay? I've seen this trench coat. You all ask, like, I'm wearing a full suit. You got a trench coat on. Bitsy's wearing eight thousand robes. We did not dress appropriately for this. Peggy had it right. Her undercatchers is hanging out in the breeze. Yeah, I'm just floating up here in the breeze. Just enjoying the nakedness beneath all of these, uh, deleted search histories. You feel... You actually are suddenly start to get... What do you mean halfway past? You get closer and closer and the castle's right above you. Make one more perception check to the advantages of scanning. Advantage but minus two, don't forget. Uh-oh. I know, like, statistically this seems very unlikely. Oh, I got a 14. A 14's good. I mean, I'm at an advantage both of these times and everything's been ten or lower. The DC was 13. Because of the information that... Oh, no, hold on. Because of the exhaustion. That's so funny. This is what we call a death spiral. What the fuck is this? It's wet getting in my monster book. I can't... Do you hear something? I think it's the Charter's Blumbo. I think it's in the night of... Hold on, I can't hear what it is you're talking about, but whenever it is, I can't hear it. Charter's Blumbo, now! I'll say Charter's Blumbo. I'll say Charter's Blumbo, where are you? Guys, that doesn't sound good. I don't know about the hear, the burst of the brumbling of the volcano. As suddenly all of the... You see stone and wood, all of this low poly pixelated bursts. As from underneath you, you see this shark-like, whale-like, polygon-like creature erupt from the lava and the stone of the bridge, chomping through the hard stone as if it was nothing. Large, sharp teeth. As it seems like Shriek wasn't lying. As a blockchomper that had been lurking and burrowing in the magma, seemingly a guardian of Overlord Trogbar's castle begins to attack. You are surprised as this thing is trying to devour you and bring you down to a fiery fate like the Italian man. I think everyone will roll for initiative. Does it vanish? I believe the surprise was disadvantaged initiative? I think that, yes, I believe so. Let me just double check. Or does he have advantage? I think he has advantage. That's why. We're still minus two if we have exhaustion. Correct. I'll detune Tess. I don't know if this will count. Is it actually in here? Oh, you're guys are disadvantaged. You can also get in here. Nets, you're a little fluid. Of course I get a natural zonian initiative. Jesus. D10 right here. Yes, let me double check. There's a D10 right there. So I got a 14. I got a 14. It doesn't vanish. Is there a D12 from this set? There's a bit. There was seven. There's another one. Oh. It's a very good Gimli impression. Do you know what this is coming from? 3 plus 1 D4? It doesn't even matter. Minus two. It's not year. I didn't know if it was... I'm quick on the draw one because of my roll. Roll? I've been getting the same number on it over and over and over. Fleet four. You get the drop. You get a 1 D4. So, Hazel got something really cool. Hazel had one of her feats is get the drop. You can add 1 D4 to initiative rolls. She gets plus three. There's a good amount of features in the backgrounds. I've already added mine. Hazel and I have the same exact thing. You get the drop? That's right. We had a background swap up too. We're going to fix that next week. Oh, I see. I believe Hazel should be able to pilot her. Oh. Quick announcement before we dive in. Which is to say that we are promoting our next Kickstarter, Neon Odyssey coming in May. If you aren't a VIP, become one at NeonRPG.com. You can sign up with your email. You can pay a dollar to play much of what you're seeing on stream tonight. That you'll see on stream on Wednesday, Friday, Monday. We're going to be doing this all month long, all the way through April through May. It's a great time. The reason why I mentioned it is because we are... We are very close to 11,000. We are very close to 11,000. Which is going to expand the free content that you get by becoming a VIP. 18 VIPs away right now. 18 VIPs away right now. We're definitely hitting that. So if you are not a VIP, NeonRPG.com head over there. One dollar. I need 20 to 25. I think I have 21. 24. I got the drop. We're the block shopper. Yeah, 21. For me. The Peggy goes before the block shopper. Nope. 24, 23, 12. Oh wow, you got 24? Damn. But now I have to decide what to do. Okay, 15 to 20. Not me. 10 to 15. 14. You want to go first? I'll go first. So, John Claude. I love that for you. Ever vigilant in the case, I got a three. Okay. Which way are we going? We're trying to go this way? Towards the block. Towards this side of the camera. For the folks at home. Oh, because that's where the ladder is. Before anyone goes, I'm going to use quick reflexes. And I'm going to move back and over here to get out of the way. Ooh. Perfect. Hold on, what do I want to do? That's a good idea. I have that as well. Oh, there's so many new things to do. And you see this block shopper. All of the art that we have here is very cute. You know, there's a wide variety of different things. So this thing looks more it's still kind of shark-like, little artillion. And it's got this dark smoky molten hide. As it is chomping forward. And with that it's Hazel's territory. It's bursting out, attempting to devour the blocks and perhaps plunge you into the lava below. All right. Oh, jeez, oh, jeez. I would be probably floating, levitating with my cheeks. Yep. So I can open my mouth and take in great amounts of air that'll let me kind of float up here so I can navigate. Because you are a soaring bitling. Because I'm a soaring bitling, exactly right. And so I would kind of move around that block a bit. Thank you. And from there I would use one of my spell slots to cast Thunder Wave. Oh! Can I do it? Can I do it? Do you want to activate the old symbiote? Oh, I could, yeah. Definitely do that. I'm just afraid it's... Oh, I guess it's not on fire. I was afraid to touch it. Okay. The symbiote... I crave the creature. Feed me Hazel. I wish to chomp the chomper. I wish to chomp the chomper. I am the one who chomps. Hazel. I am the one who chomps. The Shred. No, the Shred. Here, let me help you out. Yeah, I'm sorry. You just named the thing. I can read it. I just don't know what I'm looking for. I'm just playing the symbiote. And so she has increased AC. She's a bonded mind. When she casts a spell, the force of creature to make saving throw one target of the spell's disadvantage on saves. Parasitic Shred. She can make a parasitic Shred as an unarmed Shrike within... reach within 10 feet, using intelligence instead of strength for attack or damage rolls. When you cast the spell, it deals damage. You can Shred. Your Shred can deal damage of the same type until the end of your turn. You can feed your symbiote side points to gain the following benefits. As a bonus action, you expend one side point to make an extra unarmed Shrike. If you previously cast a spell this turn, you have advantage on the attack roll. When you take damage, you can expend up to two side points, reduce the damage you take by 1d6 per side point expended. So what you could do is you could use Unbound Psy and unleash your psionics and you basically get these benefits here. And then as a bonus action, and then just use parasitic Shred as your action. You definitely want to go ham. That's what I would do if I was a parasitic chipmunk. Okay. I will do that. And so the Unbound Psy is a bonus action. So I'll start with that. And then I will do that. You see that as the Beasel or the Beasel Bumble starts to kind of grow and go, yes, he's going to feed me as it gets larger and starts to grow more up your body. As you see this, your tail rises up and then a second one rises up almost like this, a two-headed Barry Monstrosity growing out of you as you have become one with this thing. All right. And so now do I make that still one attack roll though, right? Or no. You can do it twice. I can do it twice. All right. Second one is 16 plus 7 is 21. 21 heads. Nice. The first one would have been a 10. 10 misses. Yeah. Okay. All right. And that is 1d8. Oh! Okay. So 1d8, but if you roll an 8 for damage, roll another d8 and add it to the damage. Oh! Oh! And she keeps going. Yes, Hazel! Feed me! So as long as she keeps hitting it. Feed me, Hans! Hit it again! My crave is fluttering! Bring it, Priscilla! And so 15. So this can be a variety of different damage types. Acid, cold, fire, lightning, poison, psychic, or thunder. But I wanted to flavor it as specifically as stomach acid. Oh, yeah! How much damage was it total? Sorry. I was just... 8 and 6 is what? 14? Plus your modifier. Plus your ant modifier. It doesn't say that here. Okay. Got it. Maybe that's because you can keep spiking. Yeah. And do you roll an advantage for both of them? I did not. Okay. So basically that one can roll twice again. Roll twice again. That would be a 17 to hit. Is that a 17 to hit? Let me just see if I would cur it. I would not. Alright. Here we go. Ah! Now a 1. So, um, both heads lunge out and chomp, chomp. As you, as it lunges out. You've seen this before, it's still unsettling. As you go, Feed me! I crave its flesh! Chomping and chomping. As you see this, and it starts just like the block that it's chomping, its flesh is devoured into little pixels and bits as it kind of then dissipates. That's it. Well done. Um, it is its turn. It's going to move. You can add your ability score. The damage. So what's your intelligence modifier? 5. Plus you add an additional 10 damage. 10 damage. Oh, my dog. I'm going to put that on here. Yeah, just add it. Just pencil it in. Plus. Amazing. This thing is going to, and it's going to use hyperchomp. And, um, uh, probably we might be in trouble here, brother. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. As it is going to... Hold on. What's that? What's that? I'm just going to double check to see what I can do. Oh, yeah. So you're going to see, you're a little surprised as it, um, it doesn't immediately go for you. It doesn't chomp? As it's going to go this way. And this is devoured. Oh! And it's going to chomp. So one, two, three, four. Oh, no. Oh! I think I know what it's doing. Five. And then it's going to use hyperchomp, and it's going to move in a straight line. As it is devouring, uh, this side of the, uh, bridge. And so, uh, one, two, three, four, five, six. Oh, no. Oh, no. It stops here. As it's going to destroy all of this bridge. And then the whole bridge. And as it does that, all of this crumbles away as well. Because it destroyed those two blocks. All of that, I see. So, everyone, everyone, and Hazel, I will say, if you wanted to be flying above, because you have 10 foot reach with your thing, you could get out of the way. Done. Well, and everything went through. So, yes. So that's gone. Everyone in that line who is not a soaring, um, bitling, must make a dexterity saving throw. Oh! Am I good at that? I'm not in the path. Fortunately, holy cow. I am good at that. Holy cow. Oh, beautiful. I got 25. I rolled almost max. You rolled a natural one, didn't you? I did! I rolled a natural one! Is that a d12 that you're rolling? No, it's a d12. Okay, you're right. I see that. Natural one, you get a negative one, plus your modifier. Negative two. So, I have a negative, yeah, I have a negative one. I don't even have a reaction to save you. There's nothing I can do. I rolled an eight. Okay, fail. Okay, well, you have to say like that. I was going to give you bar of inspiration, but not what that would save you this time. No, it's a bit of a shame. I was going to try to do it on my turn. I might roll low. I might roll low. As it's used as hyperchomp. I rolled pretty low. I rolled pretty low. One, two, three, four, five, six, 12, 15 points of piercing damage, and you fail. Oh, no, I pass. And you're prone. And you're not prone. You take the stone. You take half, and you're not prone. So, seven. So, 15? What was that? 15? Uh-oh. Oh, buddy, guys. I got you. I got you. I have you too. Are we like knocked back? Because this bridge is like gone now, right? You are... It is... Yeah, so we're like... I'm standing above the bridge. You have three cyclines. Yes. And so what I will say is that all of you who get under the bridge, there are still those two large pillars on either side. I think that all of you, as this crumbles away, can use your reaction, spend your reaction, to attempt to cling on to one of these things. You're going to need to make a dexterity saving throw. It's just like Grof McGrath always does. Looks like I'm gonna have to jump. And I'm trying to go for the jump. Jeez. Oh, is it on our turn? Or right now? Right now? If I ever had a high roll. Now's not the time for me. 16! Oh my gosh. Minus exhaustion. That's enough? I think it's 13. I think most of the saves are 13. Probably okay. How was it on the top? 14. Who was it? I passed the first one. There's still no bridge. Just kidding, I gotta try again here. Sorry, my apologies. 21. You're able to grab on. I grabbed Brumley and the thing. You swing up. I would say put both of you on that block. Is you're able to do that. I rolled an 8. An 8. As you see Jean Claude begin to fall. As it chomps into, you get some of your flesh rendered by strange polygonal teeth. As you begin to fall into the lava. You get a turn into a wagons. And that is its turn. LUM. Could you put Jean Claude off the bridge this way? Next to the pillar. With Jean Claude in hell. With that, it is Peggy's turn. Would I have enough speed flying to get to Jean Claude? I would say absolute. What's your speed? 30. I think it's 30. I don't think so. If you're up pretty far. I don't think so. I'm also probably going down at the same time. I'm also probably going down at the same time. It's close. I would say why don't you make a acrobatics check for me. I'll go with that. 13's the DC. 12. Wait, wait, wait. Use your collectible drop. Collectible drop. You can use collectible drop. It's this one. Non-readment. If the DC is 13, you're 12. Peggy is going to start. You're going to see all of these red bits just kind of flying off of Peggy as her eyes start to glow and she's honing in on Jean Claude. And it almost looks like the technical fabric of Arcadia is being torn apart as Peggy begins to plummet forward. But she realizes she's not going to make it. She reaches up and a little digital bit fly appears in her hand and she crushes it. Charging herself up a little more. Adding a D4. I have a D4. I don't know where it is. I don't know where it is. I have a D4 for you. Oh my god, this is really important. I've got to get at least a wine for a D4 roll. I have to get a one. I have to get a one on this. I've got a three. 15. And I'm going to rush towards Jean Claude and barely reach out and grab onto him as I then use my I then use my ability as a flying type to grant him flying for one minute. How do you do that? I am a black hole and you see that he starts to the code starts to go across him but unlike Ziggy being green, mine's red and you see all of these angry looking emojis begin to just kind of appear all over his skin as he begins to float on my digital magics. You see all these negative tweets show up. And do you spend the tokens for that? Yeah, I use one of my little fly token. Oh, that's right. And you see that as you power up as you fly and you hear this crackle almost static glitching noise as you reach down and Jean Claude, you're falling in your pristine suit and you look back at your head, I'll say I'll say brother, I always knew you'd end up fried with lemon herbs and spices is what you deserve and then suddenly you stop as you look as you are surging out in the realm of Arcadia, but it has caught you as you are now levitating above this boiling lava. Get him two blocks so he can even fly on his own now, right? Yeah, they're right there, but I'm holding onto him right now. Because you guys are probably not going to go with this one. Huh? This one? Yeah. And then you just, there you go. Is that anything else Becky? I don't, that's a magic action to do, so I think that's my entire turn. Yes, you as you suddenly grant flight, the rooster can now fly. And it is also now your turn, John Claude. Time, it's time. You're welcome by the way. Peggy, I'll say, I'll say thank you. I can fly. I can fight! And your flight speed is the same as my speed. So even if you are exhausted, your flight speed is 30. Your rights, oh, it overrides it? That's what it says, it says that your flight speed is equal to my speed for one minute. Dude, a little bit of a tail action there. As the, the block chop just starts tearing through and knocks me off the bridge, and then Peggy heroically flies down and gets to me, while you were off sight of me just over the edge of the bridge as it was blowing up, and then I'll start to slowly rise up flying through the air, and I'll start to get covered in this mystical energy as my nose explodes off me as I all turn into this mystical energy, and then I start swirling around, and forming onto me, you'll see on the chest plate, my leather, my leather battle armor coming in, as it takes form, and it takes color and shape around my legs, my, my, my leathers attached to the legs, and then you'll see, as I'll just, I'll call out, Cuckoo doodle do! I say I'll say the cock crows and the pin grows! As my fountain pen, my fountain pen will erupt from the plumage at the end, it will erupt into a ten foot long vampire killing, uh, Mace of, of Destiny, uh, Whip of Destiny, Whip of Destiny, on Mace, uh, as, as I fly out from beneath the, the bridge and now, uh, and I'm also like, like, you know, gained muscle, and I'm no longer wearing my glasses, uh, as I rise up in this crazy mane of beautiful plumage of rooster hair, uh, comes back across my head, uh, as he rooster, uh, arises from, uh, what was surely his death. Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba And I will keep Belmont's trust to you! Yeah! I will fly towards the, uh, I will fly towards the, the block chomp. And you, you could hover, so you'd be like, right of the head. Yeah, yeah. What is your pen called, Mace? On your character? Vee. Oh! Uh, my oh, my pen is my I have an ear. Pen is mightier? Yeah, I hope. Uh, I think it's, I think my, I think my pen is a magical fountain pen. Your vessel of power. Oh, I'm sorry. The vessel of the sake of his, his eternal subclass. His eternal subclass is the vessel of power. It is now mechanically formed into an energy whip, uh, that is self-powering. All of this is happening. I have my fly pad out, and I am just coding into you, like, go, go, go, go, go, go. Your heart's pounding and pounding and pounding. So I'm like trying to keep you up in the air. Oh, I'd like the philosopher kings of old have said the pen is mightier than the sword, but surely not the whip! Uh, as I, as I, uh, crash down and I attack, uh, at the, uh, at the block jumper. I now, I'm so mechanically what I've done is I'm now surging. I've accessed this, uh, this might by Arcadia. By Arcadia, I have the might. Uh, I accessed this well of power. I may, several things are gonna happen. I'm gonna choose three damage types of my choice that I will now gain resistance to. Oh! Uh, piercing, uh, I don't know, piercing bludgeoning. Okay. And radiant. Okay. Um, I will then also gain surge damage. Anytime I make a damage attack, I'll add two, uh, plus two bonus to the damage. Uh, and then I will now have advantage on strength checks and strength saving throws. Uh, and then I will, uh, roll to attack and uh, uh, there's a lot going on. There's a lot going on. Flying up, cast through. Who needs your beam, which is a saving throw? I don't roll to attack. Uh, I ascend over the, I ascend from the other side of the bridge. And as my, my whip, uh, grows out, uh, I spin it around myself and I form it into, uh, uh, as I catch its, its edge and I hang onto it. It forms almost a triangle in front of me as I move my arms out in, in front. And I use my effect, energy beam, uh, and repulsing my attack. Each creature of my choice, uh, in a 30 foot line, the whip grows to 30 feet that is massive beam. Uh, in a 5 foot wide must succeed in a DC 15 dexterity saving throw. So you could, you could still be up crazy high then. Yeah. Uh, that way, that way you're safe. Uh, um, uh, DC 15 dexterity saving throw. Uh, dexterity saving throw. I want to make sure it doesn't, it doesn't reduce its, its, uh, speed, right? At all? Just double checking? No, this will just do damage. I got a 7. What? As this, uh, this whip, uh, you can make this a beam of, uh, of light. Vampire killer begins to play. The Vard killer. The Vard killer. Oh, sorry. Did he fail? He failed, yeah. Nice. Um, oh, and also, also an added benefit, an added benefit, uh, to everyone, an ally that starts his turn within 10 foot emanation, originating from me. Oh, may add 1d4 to any saving throw. Damn. Until the start of his next turn. Your turn, Nora. As my turn, Nora. As, uh, oh, I'm sorry, and you were, um, that's 11 points of force damage. Okay. As the Vard killer emanates this, uh, righteous light as it bades you in, uh, light that destroys Vards, light design that destroys Vards, but it's gonna fuck up some chainsaws. I mean blockjumps. Okay. Uh, with that, it is uh, Booker's turn. There's chaos on this battlefield. Asshum madness. Jean-Claude is screaming. He's evolved into the asshum pinnacle of rooster form. Peggy's coding and there's all these, uh, the symbiotes going ham. There are there are blocks flying as this monster's destroying the bridge, but amongst all of it, you begin to hear the dulcet sounds of space lion and there I am holding on to my friend Grumly as he holds on to me and I begin to play the saxophone. This is not uncommon. I have only one thing, baby, and it's jazz. And so the very first thing that I'm going to do is I'm actually going to use a first level spell slot to cast cure wounds on my buddy Grumly. Uh, it is 2d8 plus my spell casting modifier. Uh, it has to be touch, which is why I'm choosing Grumly. Uh, you will heal it. Uh, I got 10 plus Wow. 5 heal, 15 points of healing as I uh, this dulcet sounds of the smooth jazz just kind of radiated over your body as you feel this healing effect, but as I am the icon subclass, the one of my level 3 features is literally smooth jazz. Ooh. Um, immediately after I cast an abduration or enchantment spell of level 1 or more, I can expend a use of my iconic inspiration, which I will do and mark off on my character sheet to choose up to 5 other creatures within 60 feet of me. The charmed and frightened conditions end on each target, and each target will gain a number of temporary hit points equal to 2 rolls of my iconic inspiration die. So you will all hear this beautiful music as the space line just uh, and you'll all get 9 temporary hit points. Oh, that's so cool. I just block out the chaos and I just feel the music and I bend the, I tap into the harmony of this song that we're all a part of and uh, heal my good friend Grumley and give everybody 9 temporary hit points. Holy shit. I wish I were you. Debra Hiplas? No, that's it. You've got it. Wow, yeah, that's it. You hear it. Men want to be him. I fall to my knees. I am weeping. I look up and even though we're in this hellscape my vision, I see stars and I'm crying. Ben's gonna make it to Titan, right? Ben's gonna make it to Titan, isn't it? Ben's gonna make it. No, he's gonna make it. I give him a little wink while I'm playing. As soon as I listen to this case live and just actively fucking weeping. And I cannot do this again until I finish the long rest. So this is uh, that was my big feature. Damn. That's my turn. That's big time. Yes, it was the one where I had full body chills and I was like they just... That was every episode. I'm sweating. I was the two-porter where... Yes. Yeah, yeah. But watch Call of Evoque and watch episode 13. Holy shit. Bitsy is sweating under her heavy robes but during moments of intensity like this her eyes are unblinking. It's what comes down her face in sheets. But she walks forward. Everything that is transpired has done so according to my design. And then she walks forward and almost disappears. Almost invisible. And you see her appear on the other side of the bridge. As I cast Misty Step. Oh, there you go. And I yell out, I cast Misty Step. Oh, there you go. And I yell out, Survival is the ability to swim in strange water. And I extend my hand like this and from underneath my... out of my sleeves these whispering beams of smoke and shadow flash out. As I cast Eldridge Blast and attempt to destroy the Chomp... the Chomp Block. You got healed for 15 and everybody got 9 temporary hit points. I'm full health. Yeah, back that's exactly what you took. That's going to be a 13 to hit. 13 hits? It's going to be dancing to the smooth jazz. That's going to be... It would be 6. But I get to add my Empowered Blast, which means I get to add my Charisma modifier. So it's 11 points of Eldridge Blast damage, which I can tell you is forced. And this... it smashes into the back of this creature and it almost like wilts like watching a fruit decompose in fast motion. And the chunk of it gets blasted away. And then there's pixels, just dematerialized and you hear like... allies to me! And I will be compelling everybody to join me on the other side of the bridge if they can so make it. And that'll be the conclusion of Bitsy's turn. Oh boy. Drumroll, you're up. And the smooth jazz is like local Amiates. And... you are all feeling and you are soothed by this jazz that Booker's playing from a saxophone. And you are renewed. Booker. It's the most beautiful song I've ever heard. This is the best comment music we've ever had. It's just so deep. And surely they won't make anything close to this good for at least the next three decades. I rise to my feet, not mechanically, because I've never filmed. Or did I fall from it? Well, I would say you are already undue with the reaction that I gave. I look and I see that I'm just on this pillar, right? And Booker's next to me, we're like teetering and you know he can jump in any minute. Exactly right. And I know that he could turn and chomp at Booker's pillar and I need to get a distraction. The only problem is I would need to leap to this next pillar here to do so. Wow. So we're going to have to look at the jump rules. I did look it up. My strength score is 20. You can jump your strength score with a running long jump. One, two, 20 feet. Unfortunately, I don't have enough speed to run a long jump. Because a standing long jump is halved. So I can only jump 10 feet, however. As I rise to my feet you will see my legs shift and roll up into my body as a it flips down a single like you like we all No! Yes! This mode duck style, like a spring in between my body appears as I'm on it. All right, Booker. You know what I have to do. Looks like I'm going to have to jump and with my spring fight with my spring fiber legs cybernetic enhancement. Oh my gosh. My speed increases by 10 feet and my jump distance is doubled. I leap and I want to leap the full 20 feet and I don't want to actually aim for the top of the pillar. Okay. I'm going to aim for the side of it. As I approach it, you will see my pug hands shift and schlup into my arms as giant metal basically knuckles gloves but like robo cop theme appear as I crush them into the side as strong bitlings have a climb speed. Oh! And I'm going to claw myself into the side of the pillar and I'm going to knuckles Sonic Adventure 2 style crawl down into the side so I've used 20 feet of movement I have 40 feet of movement because I have my cybernetic enhancement. You're whole and molly. That's the cyber guard in Foursart right in front of them but not in melee range and I haven't used a single action or bonus action. This is all just part of my cybernetic enhancements and my bitling species. The jazz is still going. Chavisot. I'm listening to Space Lion I look at the booker and I look at his outfit I take out my first cannon and I say oh, I just wanted to do this bang and I shoot him Oh, as my bonus action you will see my helm light up brightly and it's targeting and it's scanning through and it's finding weak points as I use my cosmic conduit and my subclass's cosmic conduit is deadly targeting. I want to take the attack action I can spend one of my cosmic channels to imbue one range weapon that I'm holding with the conviction of my code for 10 minutes or until I use this feature again I ignore half cover and I can cast cosmic smite when I hit a target with a range weapon Oh, that's so cool You're definitely going to get it We're going to beat you with a power friendship and this gun he found I make my attack I'm going to say that I'm going to say that I'm going to say that What was it? Is it 14? Yes, it's 14 It deals Hold on, it's a 14 It's 1d12 Oh I got some 12s over here I got some 12s over here It's a 3 plus 5 and I would like to Yeah, you do This isn't a bonus action, is it? Deadly targeting No, it's when I make an attack action I will use my bonus action Nice, you cosmic smite And I will add some de-8s to it Oh, God Oh, my God 1, 2, is it 2? I got some extra de-8s over here if you knew them I can take it right here, hold on Is it 2d8? I'm going to double check real quick as I listen to this to look what it needs It probably has the weather rolling That's very funny Oh, a large sprinkle later too Stay tuned for traffic next Spells It's going to be Sunny Skies and Fort Lauderdale Smoothed your problem in your Uncle's Time share right now 105.9 105.9 Yes, no, no, no 19 19 points of lightning damage I'm as huge Some of this radiant It doesn't matter 10 of this radiant and then the rest is lightning damage It gets blasted It's not expecting you to do that It's getting Fragmented It is looking very rough It's what I will say I'm hoping that I'm standing alone On the edge of this bridge It's facing me I'm hoping he will chomp my way And with that Everything is cool But then suddenly you realize Everything is cool Everything is awesome Everything is cool when you're part of a team And it's smoothed Wait a minute I'm perfectly sized As one Massive boulder Crashes into the middle of the lava Where you're all fighting And erupts Into a massive splash Everyone needs to make a dexterity saving throw As lava and magma Just erupt everywhere Okay Oh no I definitely fail I definitely fail Oh Hold on I was rolling hot 13 is the d-sane I just I'm gonna eat, I tied you Oh boy This could be rough What are the chances? 11, 15 17 points of fire damage if you failed Half of you succeeded 10 HP 17, half is 8 As it erupts everywhere As It is now Hazel your turn Actually You watch As this fireball Is coming right for Booker I don't see it And all of a sudden the smooth jazz is extinguished As The fireball disperses My lifeless body Is laying on top of the pillar No Things look extremely grim Except in that moment you hear And out of my body Pops a golden note Token As I choose to use the respawn feature You got me for exactsies I hit 0 When I drop to 0 hit points I can expend a token That I'm carrying to drop to 1 hit point instead Once I use this trait I cannot use it again until I finish a long rest I have 1 token left I I I have a fire But I'm still alive And I managed to get up with 1 hit point You dropped your ring, I mean your token As you managed to stay He flashes white and a bunch of You get a little bit of eye frames Before I scream back into existence Hazel, you know You've seen that Booker is weak, that this thing If it gets to go again it can destroy most of the bridge And there's not going to be anything left As you hear in your voice Oh, free me Hazel The Bumbleberry Craves I could never say no to you So you'll First you will You'll look at me And it's kind of looks like I'm chewing on something I've put my hand in my mouth And I start to chew And then the noise will start to hit you And it'll kind of sound like Really faintly Wrappers crinkling Then Kind of wet mouth eating sounds And just really like Anything that would really bother you If you had mesophonia And that is going to be A What I'm going to use here is the Armor of Secrets So for a bonus action Which lasts for an hour The Shroud of Shadowy Whispers Which in this case are going to be disgusting eating noises Will settle over me So I will gain 10 temporary hit points And as an added feature here If a creature hits you with a melee Attack roll before the spell ends The creature will take 10 psychic damage Okay, and so for what it's worth Just so you know, you don't gain another 10 You just get 10 temporary hit points So your 9 goes to 10 They don't stack, it just replaces them Okay, I didn't know that You have your protection feature Yeah, you would have gotten hit, right? By the lava I did, so you would have only Had one temporary hit point Yeah, I wrote that wrong, I'm sorry Yeah, either way, it just doesn't add to it So that would be my bonus action And Then I'm sorry, I will use The Symbiolash again At this point, the jelly of the tail Is increasing up on my body And It's kind of starting to take over a little bit So I will lash the tail out Okay Go ahead buddy, take your fill And make a Spell Attack Oh my gosh 14 Natural 20 Just use toast Oh my god You got extra chances to hit those 8s Okay Oh you do Help me keep track of this Do I still have one attack or two attacks? You can use the side swing To get another one Let's see how this one goes I don't think you're ready Seven, so you have one more Roll one more Seven Five, okay So that's 12 plus 10 Plus 5 Yes 17 Acid And then if it's still alive, you can spend a side point I'm gonna do this Oh The chomper gets chomp Yes, I want my great Gooey tail to raise up And just lunge forward at it And it'll smack At it and it'll kind of seem like Underwhelming at first, but then it'll still pulse Impulse And grow and take over The entirety of this giant creature That's exactly what happens As this thing is like It's a thing Yes The bumbleberry I am the one who chomps And grows and grows and grows As your tail gets even bigger Than the block chomper You become too big for the block chomper And bite and in one single bite Shoo And a massive swallow You hear a brrrrrrrring As the As the beasel Or the bumbleberry Has swallowed the block chomper Yeah I am Satiated Oh man As I swallow an idea As you kind of hear this sigh And none of you hear this As this creature shrinks back As it's all this blue to like the Deering on a conda As the tail kind of grows back And it's almost like it's Enjoying its meal And savoring the digestion Oh Whoa It costs okay Look down I really heard I am not too it's so cool right now guys Booker I climb back up and I use my spring To jump back to the other pillar Oh gosh Booker, oh gosh Get over to the other side junk Claude Before your flying goes away I'm getting exhausted here To me The flying goes away right there So last a minute One minute, oh my god I'll fly over to Benz Um Oh god I will Thanks My hand will turn back To the away from the knuckles glove Back to a pug hand And I'll put My hand on your On your shoulder You're gonna be just fine You're gonna be just fine And you'll see A ring on my hand That has A blood held like a face With a future on it Yeah Sort of glow and flash As like almost my code Affects his code And almost like these kind of like Scan lines and grid lines appear As I'm going to use Tintative name by wounds Uh, we'll workshop that one Um, and I'm going to pour I'm gonna just pour all 15 points of Ah, in here Oh, Gromly thank you Oh boy, you okay? I'm hanging in there I know what you do without you buddy You got the package, you alright? It's in there It's in here, it's still a little wet Good work, bugger Ah Everybody alright? Oh yeah, perfectly fine I actually feel a lot better than when we started I'm just glad the saxes Are one piece Alright, how are we gonna cross here Gromly? Wait, don't forget the thing I'm gonna point, and where the blockchomper Is, I presume Well, I feel like I should be able To have this one since I had to Expend one of mine to save our friends' life Oh, it seems only fair What's floating there? Hazel is definitely the closest Are there six or is there one? Technically there would be one for each of us So, as you see Where this thing has devoured Floating in the air Almost spinning around in a circle Are six floating tokens One for each of you A color-coded like in Donkey Kong 64 Of where only each of you All of your tokens, your inherent Bitling energy, as you can collect Another token from the enemy that you fell For what it's worth This is a part of our collectable Drop bitling feature Which is not only when you finish a long rest You gain a token, but When an enemy within 30 feet of you Is reduced to zero hit points A token appears in its space and remains for one minute Or until we collect it We can have a maximum of four tokens At one time Amazing Sweet! Nice walk everybody I'm gonna like, scamper down the pillar Carefully To the best of my ability and try to get over To pick up my golden musical note I believe that Jean-Claude and I would actually Physically need to get the tokens However, I think you are actually too far away By 30 feet But Jean-Claude Could have grabbed his before he went to the next one I would not get a token Rules is written, that's totally reasonable I still have two, I'm good I now have two tokens, that was down to one If I may say If I had seen them before I would have scooped it before flying over to Betsy If they are floating in the air I would try to do some like Platformer like collecting the Would you like me to pick up your friends and Fly them over? I also would have thought to Can we fly? Yeah, I would You would have a carry I think so Can we? I thought we had to use Medium or light armor We have to use a coin to do it We can touch them We can touch them Touch an ally to give it a fly speed Grab them and carry them While flying, right? I would say make an athletics check That you are advantage with because you are a surgeon And you have the power Bar killer He uses surgery, I don't know if you said that I did, I did say it Through every piece of it Surge, I rolled an 11 You said athletics Plus 7 That's an 18 I think you would be able to pick up I think you I'll jump into another Digi-Bone I'm so excited for calling you You are able to grab both of your friends because you are yoked out You are going to return back to your normal Slick Finance Trader form soon You need to get your friends Because you have the power I'll say I'll say it, fellas Quick, it's only for a little while longer I'm imbued with the power of house Sean to Claire Come grab your tokens and come with me We do, we do And while you are flying us and we scoop up our tokens I'm going to put a hand on Bromley's shoulder I'm going to say you would have made McGruff Proud today I want you to know that, don't ever forget that And I'm going to give him a Bartek inspiration Which is iconic inspiration Is the actual user So you'll have it for an hour In case you decide to roll less than a 10 again You can add a D6 to your roll Thank you Booker, but it's mixed gruff Oh, my fault I've already walked away I'm just kidding You all land on the other side The blockchomper The heeding The warning of Shriek As you complete the journey Across the bridge to the castle The door is open All the cannons are not pointing down They're unable to I think of Shriek as we approach The front of the castle and we turn away from the bridge I Look for a ladder If there is a... Oh, you already passed that And he missed the roll No guy that was saying hey help me That was the shark shriek You get it with that I just whisper to my friends To know a thing well To know its limits Only when pushed beyond its tolerances Will its true nature be seen It's kind of like John Claude He was pushed beyond his limits And he was magnificent I've ever seen Now You don't even recognize me anymore You'd have to mechanically Beat a 20 inside check Where did the handsome man go? I'm the same person Handsome man Rooster, where did he go? John Clark over here You... The bow cut was a bold choice It's looking like man-dark I'll say, I'll say I confess it was me The flying warrior What did that cool burst of energy Was made all along I know it's hard to tell with the glasses But in the next high I'm really glad you didn't die Thanks for saving me Peggy That was amazing I felt kind of slightly corrupted But then I took to the skies Well yeah, I did it all by Writing this really interesting fan fiction On Wattpad Yeah, because in my fanfic You have the ability to fly Well Yeah Oh Oh Oh Oh And I did a little drawing Oh, that was so anatomically incorrect You're welcome Good Oh It's 80% of the total mass I don't know, I think it's Some of my best works really It's just the drawing is quite Specific It's only the first of many Your line work is incredible You enter Overlord What do you do? What do you say? Are you going to walk in? What do you do as you approach? Are we in front of like a door? I would say the door is open as you approach The door opens, but there's this strange dark This dark kind of There's kind of this eerie glow far off You see this massive castle Overlord's castle Do you think we can just like door dash Drop it? I was going to say We could just like snap a quick photo I'll just zip it over to his email Oh, Boogat, did he select I was going to check the delivery instructions Is it hand off? Hand it to me Hand it to me, but the ink is running They don't normally mean that though No, the Sheer Cool Express Guarantee is that we will hand it off to you Yes, we must give the package Directly to Overlord Trogda Alright, just grumbly stay near me I will poke my head inside Let me see if I can yell for him Wait, are we feeling confident about that? I mean, you almost died back there Yeah, but I grumbly knew me He almost plummeted to his death You saved him? You saved me It was really close And you, I mean You seem right to deal with my like With your legs? I did, but you got really close You almost died too if it hadn't been for Booker Peggy, I'm just going to say I'm a dangerous man With some tokens in my pocket Alright, we're going to be alright here Well, how about we go in and grumbly will stand at your left I'll stand at your right and we'll make sure that Everything goes I'll float right above you Yeah, exactly right We'll yell for him and we'll sniff him out But you're going to keep the package on you the whole time, right? Absolutely, I'll make sure that I don't let go of until it's in his hands Can we go ahead and You know, do something just to make sure you're protected You want to do something to me? Yeah Alright, sure, I trust you I'm going to float down and I'm going to put my hands on either side of your face And you're going to see all of the Strange red code begin to move all over your body Until you start seeing a bunch of captures appear Oh, oh, oh And they're all like, you're the worst captures you've ever seen I can't read that Motorcycles, book a little book, I said look the motorcycles Which one is the bus? Which one is the bus? Is that a bus or a motorcycle? If it ever seems like it The bus is swinging in the other frame, I can't shoot None of these, that's a bus None of these are motorcycles As I fill your form full of Activated malware But It's not going to harm you It just should someone attack you I'll read it, you can touch a creature, I can target myself To infuse it with dormant malicious code For one hour When a creature hits the protected target With an attack roll, the target can take a reaction To force the attacker to make a DC-15 Intelligent saving throw On a failed save, the attacker has disadvantage on ability checks And attack rolls until the start of the protected creature's next turn So, just going to keep you protected Yeah, I mean, so if anyone wants to do anything to you They're going to have to bypass All of my All of my protected code, okay? Wow, that felt weird for a second there But now, feel all right? Yeah, and these riders rain? You know, it's not going to hurt you, I never hurt you, but you know I'll be enough, you said that in the Wattpad story too Oh, hold on, hold on, I added another piece Oh, all right Is it the part about the pen it's mine? Let's hunt the other one down Oh, with my friends Close to my side, I will just kind of poke my head In the front door and say, hello? Miss Overlord? We're here, we have your package Let me, hold on My personal communicator that comes in my Graphic stuff, your details bear Weigel I'm letting you know that I have darkfishing As I proceed up the calendar Oh, fucking yippie Sounds And you all step in, you call out? Yeah, absolutely Try to get some sort of any kind of an answer Oh, my delivery Come on in All right, we're coming in, Miss Overlord Thank you for having us, it's the Circle Delivery Service We must away quickly, and here we are So cool, Express always has the best power-ups As you all enter And then suddenly you see this huge shape Over you see this grand Welcoming chamber in this castle As this massive form Leaps down and lands And it's this large, humanoid, somewhat polygonal Creature Who is all like this reptilian lizard Spike Spikey version wearing a large Cape And a regal armor As he has a relatively small crown Atop his horned head As he looks down at you and says You have my power-up? Before we give it to you though We do have a couple of customs questions Is this a gift or not? Oh, it's for me? But is it a gift or not? No, I paid Weigel good sums This was marked as a gift Which means that not all of the fees have been paid Oh no Are there customs? This one time We'll let it slip But you better make sure to mark your packages correctly Alright Alright, sure Now that my, that whole thing with my family I'll have more time on my hands Are there cre- are there cremated remains in this? Uh, just shreds Just shreds Okay Ah Ah Ah It's Always not there remains Oh You all are silly, I'm a vegetarian He grabs that As he opens the bag immediately Oh my god, I know what it is And there is a huge Sopping bean burrito As it literally says On the wrapping Um, Trog Bar is a big bean burrito As I've been blocked up for three months Ah Oh, that'll take care of me Nice and fine, Weigel has the best power-ups I feel powered up And you see a pew pew pew pew pew As he seems to like change As he says, well Before that is, as is written on the Trog Bar stone to make sure You don't steal, um Try to steal Uh, she What the hell, she tell us She tell us Uh, I can't allow you to Leave here alive and the door Slam shut Unless you defeat me in a car race to all of my Realms And that is where we'll end this episode Oh Oh Oh Well now we don't even look forward to it Oh my god That's fucking a car race A session of the night Thanks for running session Mike Amazing