Thomas Rhett: Stop Giving Your Best To Everyone Else

Right everyone, this is not a drill, it's finally time to get the match ready. We're bringing the big summer energy with the incredible prices at Asda. Get ready for the match with a 55-inch sharp Roku UHD TV, roll back from £348 to just £242 and get two for £20 across 20 different packs of beer and cider like Corona and Budweiser. That's Asda price. Delected stores in line, subject to availability, Corona 12x3 30ml, Budweiser 15x4 40ml. Exclude Scotland and Wales, Asda Express and Small Stores, the Asda.com slash Small Stores. I want to be known and loved the most by the people that love and know me the most. You know what I'm saying? That's so good. And it's like you're your best self in front of complete strangers. But you're your worst version of yourself in front of the people that admire and respect you the most. Or my family getting the best version of me. And that's like, buddy. That is the whole, the world loves to talk about work-life balance. I don't believe in it. I don't. What do you believe? I believe that you have to sort of be 100% committed where your feet are. Now I have to say congratulations. Thank you. For what? Your son. My son. That's right. The biggest thing that could be going on right now. Like the number one thing that could be going on now. Yeah. So how is it being, have a son? Dude, it's incredible. I mean, you know, when, I feel like when babies are under six months, it's hard to fully tell personality or anything. But he's like, he's eight weeks and he's like one of those babies, he was huge. He was 10 pounds when he came out and now he's like 13 pounds. And so he's like, he's already doing things that a five month old should be doing at eight weeks, which is why he's smiling. He's like eye contacting. Like I feel like his little personality is coming out. And I don't remember my other kids having that much personality at eight weeks old. Yeah. He's already in like six to nine month clothing. That's unbelievable. I think he's going to be a linebacker. For sure. He did not get that from me. I don't really know what gene that came from. He came from somebody. Yeah. I was a nice like slot receiver. You know what I mean? 145 pounds. He's probably going to be huge, but it's been amazing, bro. I'll be honest with you for the first 10 years as being a parent, I just sort of accepted the fact that we weren't going to have a boy and I was good with it. Like I always wanted a boy, but the more girls we started having, I was like, I can do this girl. You have four. Four daughters. That's right. Yeah. And man, I just, I don't know. I just never thought it was in the cards and this, you know, obviously last year, the Lord kind of opened up some wild doors for us and we got pregnant. And I think Lauren has it, my wife, Lauren has it in her phone of like 20 different people that called her before we got pregnant and during our pregnancy that said, Hey, even people she hadn't talked to in a long time. They're like, Hey, I just had this crazy dream that you're pregnant with a boy. That's awesome. Like 20 recorded dreams. Like our kids had some, our friends had some. And so we all, like we didn't find out until the day of the birth, which we'd never done that on any of the other kids. And for all of you listening, I highly recommend it. Really? Yeah. Because there's no surprises in this world. That's like the most ultimate surprise. It's the ultimate surprise. And so watching little boy come out was, was one of the coolest moments of my life. That's awesome, man. But it's awesome. Super, super happy for you. Thanks, bro. That's fantastic. So my, my son is eight. Okay, cool. And I know is now your son. How many months now? Two months. Yeah. Okay. So I like, he's, he's already at the perfect age to like talking to him about like the weather and stuff like this. First thing you got to know is that you got to have the radar like immediately like my deck and just whip out the radar at any moment. Yeah. Absolutely. This is a cell that's coming in. It's only going to last a few minutes. Yeah. Yeah. Like you have to know weather. You have to know a few things about life. Sports, how to change a wall. That's true. Yeah. And my dad didn't, my dad was like, this is how to handle stuff in the courtroom. But that was, that was, that was, that was his way of an old change. Yeah. So what was it? Can I ask you, am I allowed to ask you a question? You can. I don't do podcasts a lot. I don't know if you know this, but we're just chilling. Okay, cool. Yeah. So like when you grow up with a dad that's a lawyer. Yeah. Did you ever win any argument like growing up? Like if he ever like laid a law down or like a rule, did you ever try to like combat that rule? And did he come at you like law your dad or just dad? Just dad. Okay. That's great. Just dad. So he was able to disconnect the two. No, they're one. They're like, they're like, so I'm a fifth generation attorney. So. Wow. Just everybody throughout my family got through DAs, federal judges, you name it. And so you didn't, you didn't win on the argument. You just got taught a lesson. That's what that was. Yeah. Yeah. You, yeah, exactly. You had a plea deal. That's a good way of putting it. And so he would teach me not in terms of this is what you do. He used what they call the Socratic method, which in law schools, you ask questions to teach the lesson. Wow. And so. Like Jesus. Exactly. So it was almost very parable ask where he would, instead of me getting upset and what you would hope a dad would do or get mad with you or get mad at you. Yeah. He didn't really show anger. Wow. He showed disappointment. Which almost makes even more mad. Which was terrifying. Right. You know, it was just like, oh my God. Pit in my stomach. But he used a lot of questions. And so he would always, his thing was he would teach me the other side of the argument. So if I was mad at my mom about something and I would want to come to him, I'm not going to find any comfort there. He's going to say, well, what do you think she's thinking in that moment? Now, as your mom, what do you think she's afraid of right now? Like he would always flip it to the question and it didn't feel good as a kid because I'm like, come on. Like, oh, he don't. But now's a grown man. What a toolbox. Oh my gosh. You're kidding. Now it's, I'm trying that with my son. How's that going? He's equally as frustrated about it. He didn't really enjoy it. Now, like with yours, you know, your dad's songwriter, singer songwriter. And did you feel like that was just part of your natural calling? You saw it, you grew up with it. Like I feel like your life is just a toy box of 90s country. Like that's just like, that's what you grew up in. Definitely. I mean, my dad, I was born in Val d'Astre, Georgia, really small town in South Georgia. We had more than a chili. So I will say that we had a little bit more than chilies. So a metropolis. Yeah, basically. And then when I was one, we moved to San Antonio. Thank you. And that was my dad. My mom and dad went to UGA University of Georgia. My dad played football there for a year and then they had me at 19. And we moved to Texas. My dad did, you remember Fiesta, Texas? Do I remember? Okay. I remember Fiesta, Texas. Yeah, I didn't live there long enough to know if like everybody was like, you know, Fiesta, Texas. Okay, so we stayed, my dad had, attorneys have to have continuing legal education credit every year. And so, which means it could be at a hotel or something. Okay. Well, we didn't have enough money to like go on vacations. What we did was if you went on the ceiling, brought your family, then it got paid for by whatever the firm. Gotcha. And so we would say at the Hill Country Hyatt, which was right next to Fiesta, Texas. And that was my vacation. Only vacation for a good solid 11 years. Like that was it. Yeah. And it was fantastic. I bet. I bet. I was too young to remember it, but what I've seen pictures and my dad basically got hired by some talent agency to basically go and do like George Strait covers at Fiesta, Texas. And so he did that. And I guess like someone was there that sort of thought he had talent. And so moved to Nashville when I was four. He signed a record deal with this company called Deca and they're not, they're not around anymore. But so moved to Nashville at four. And so I grew up in a little town called Hendersonville, Tennessee, which is like, it used to be 20 minutes north of here. Now it's like an hour north of here traffic traffic. And so I grew up, you know, with a dad that in during his like artist career, you know, he would tour 200, 250 days a year. I mean, just always gone. And so I would always ask my dad, like, can I go on the road? Can I go on the road? Can I go on the road? And I've been singing since I was like four. I mean, I could, I was like a walking jukebox. I knew every song on country radio. And my first instrument actually was the drums. I love to play the drums. And so I loved getting on the bus with my dad to go play whatever, you know, fair festival he was going to play. And I was, I would get up and play Sweet Home Alabama. Mary Jane's Last Dance on the drums. And I just remember being like, this is awesome. And so that kind of morphed into like, I had a couple of little bands, you know, in fifth grade, sixth grade, punk rock band. Yeah. And my dad's brother was always a production engineer slash like front of house guy. And so he recorded my very first album in my dad's living room. We recorded five songs, played one show that 10 people attended. And I knew that I always sort of had that bug. I loved to just entertain people like my sister and I would always, you know, make up like little skits. And my dad would film and we'd write scripts out and stuff. And so I always, you and your sister, huh? You have how many siblings do you have? So I've got a wide range. So my sister is four years younger than me. Okay. My parents divorced when I was nine. Okay. Both got remarried. So my mom and my stepdad have a brother of mine. He's 21 years old, just 21. And my dad and my stepmother have a six year old son. So I have quite a range. It's all over the range. Yeah. But anyway, you know, going through high school and stuff, I always played the talent shows. I was always like the lead and the Christmas play or whatever I did at school. And so I always loved to be on stage and I just loved to make people smile and make people laugh and dance. And so, but when I got to college, I never really thought I could make a career of it. And so I went to Lipscomb University here in Nashville. Yeah. Was headed towards a communications degree. Hey. But for me, it was the fastest route out. It was the easiest major. I did marketing in business school for the same reason. Like, just get me out of here. Yeah, get me out. And then my sophomore year, my dad had completely kind of quit his artistry career and just pursued full time songwriting. And so him and a group of guys were having a lot of success in like the early 2000s, sort of like when Bro country sort of entered the world like Link Brannan's and the Jason Aldean's and... My speakers go boom, boom. The speakers go boom, boom. Yeah. And so like they were called the Peach Pickers. That was their little writing group and not little, their big writing group. Right. And I literally did, I mean, you couldn't turn on the radio for more than 20 minutes without hearing tourist songs that they had written for artists. It was nuts. That's wild. I was like in some cover bands in college and then one day I just asked my dad, I was like, can I come sit in on these writing sessions? I just want to, I just don't understand it really. Like I just want to watch how y'all do this. And it really is just like this. Yeah. And then I was like, wow, somebody starts playing a little chord on the guitar and you're like, hey, I had this idea that I wrote down on my phone yesterday. And I'm just like, whoa, so this is how it works and offered up some of my, you know, terrible lyrics into the room. And fast forward a couple of months, I played a gig downtown with my dad and there was a guy there that offered me a developmental publishing deal. Nice. Because he thought I had some talent. And from then on, dude, I started writing with a bunch of other people who were just getting going and got my first cut ever with Jason Aldean. It was like 2011. Yeah. And then I started to get a bunch of cuts as a songwriter and then one thing led to another. I started playing for record labels, got offered a few deals and signed my first record deal at 21. And here I am 16. It goes like this. 16 years later. Like the first ones. That's my first number one song. And you've had 20 number ones. 25. 25. Nuts. It doesn't feel real. But everything that was going to happen? Absolutely not. If you ask my wife, my wife was banking on it, not working. Yeah. She was like, this is cute. Yeah. Yeah. Go try your little record deal thing. Dude, okay. I love that because the first video I ever made and you know, I'd make videos in my car. Yeah. My wife said, go be my little influencer. That was like her first thing. And so like, I was like, never banked support. Yeah. You really, she really, yeah. So there you go. She goes, go, go do your little artistry stuff. Yeah. So we did, we did the premarital counseling, counseling deal and we got married at 22 years old. And our marriage counselor, my wife graduated from University of Tennessee with a nursing degree. Were you all high school sweethearts? Sort of. We've known each other since first grade and we dated in high school a little bit and then we broke up and then didn't get back together until a little bit later. We were high school sweethearts. Cool. But it sounds like you like, want her back and you're like, it's always been you. It was always her. It was always her. It really was. There you go. So we got married at 22 and our marriage counselor advised Lauren to not pursue her nursing thing for just one year. She was like, I think y'all just really need to be together because the first year of your touring is an absolute nightmare. Oh, I can't imagine. You're gone. I mean, I think we played 280 shows that year or something. So my wife rode the bus with me and my seven other band dudes for an entire year and after that year was over, she was like, I have put my time in. I'm done with the road. But yeah, so I put two singles out before it goes like this that did okay. But it goes like this with my first number one and then, man, wildly, like I'm thinking about it now. I think we only had one miss, right? There's only one single I put out to radio. Is that right? Why? During the, in my whole career. I didn't want to get number one. Correct. Well, besides the first two, yeah, there was one that I put out in the middle of my career that didn't go number one, but it like it streamed and sold like it was a number one. That's unreal. I remember calling radio stations. Yeah. Like, hey, can you play this? Why aren't you playing this? Oh, what's the deal? What's wrong with it? It was just like, it's just a little like not doesn't fit the box. And I was like, yeah, all right, that's fair. You know, agree to disagree. But that was a lot of the songs in my career, man. On my second record, dude, I put this song out called Crash and Burn that was just super, just not what country radio was playing at all. When that song went number one and a song called Make Me Wanna, it sort of carved this like weird unique lane for me where the songs were sort of so off-kilter, but I think people recognized my voice. And so I've kind of made a living off of kind of always playing a little bit outside the lane of what quote unquote, you know, country radio is. You've definitely, you've definitely found your own. Found the lane. Yeah. Before we get going, I want to take a moment to tell you about Cozy Earth. One of the reasons I absolutely love Cozy Earth is because everything they make, truly the name holds up is Cozy. And I don't know about you, but I love to wear around the house a lounge wear. I also, you might see me at the grocery store in some lounge wear. I just, I like it. If I don't have to dress up, that's what I'm going to. Well, Cozy Earth, their stuff is top notch. It's only not, it's not only made well, but it also feels really good. And it's something that I can throw on and know if I'm going to go outside, do something with the kids. It's easy. And you know what helps when you're a busy dad and busy life or busy parent is easy. So you can go to CozyEarth.com slash Jefferson, use the code Jefferson for up to 20% off. These are their pants. I absolutely love them. CozyEarth.com slash Jefferson, use the code Jefferson for up to 20% off. And now let's keep going. I'm going to ask you a question that this is a selfish question. Okay. So in a different life, I would have been a songwriter. Great. I love that. It's true. We're not done. And I can be a lawyer. So I grew up James Taylor. Yeah. I'm a crochet. Like that was a singer songwriter. Sure. How does when you're in that room for the first time, the, and with your dad and guys, is it like super nerve wracking when you're around people who know how to write songs and you're like, actually, I think it might be cool to add in this. And they're like. Totally. Like how did they, how did they politely kind of say no, but no. They were like, how does that walk me through that process? Yeah, but it still happens. Like I was, I mean, I don't, I hate the term professional. I hold fully loosely as a singer or an artist. Yeah. But walk me through that. Yeah. I mean, the thing that we do now is if we, if we hear a line from someone who even is a great songwriter and they say something, we're like, oh, that's cool. That's it. You know what I mean? That's your good. That's like the polite way of saying that's not the line. Yeah. Oh, that's cool. Anyway, you know, but when you're an unexperienced writer, like I was in that room, even just having the courage to speak is horrifying. I mean, it's like stepping on the first T-Box at Augusta. It has to be. I think of like, whenever I see any bluegrass circles, you know, I mean, if I was, I might have to jump in on a, I would just be terrified if like you're going in there. Like just the way. I will say that's more nerve-wracking. You're just kind of an okay guitar player. Yeah. Hop in with a much professional bluegrass player. I just wouldn't play. But in a writing room, so you have a little more, it's different. It's a little bit. Okay. There's more grace there. Okay. Yeah. Because you just physically can't be as good as those bluegrass guys. I feel like in, in communication, we say, yeah, that's crazy. Like things that aren't crazy, but we don't want to say. That's my conversations with a stranger. You know what I mean? You don't want to say like, that was kind of useless information. I don't know what to do with that. Whoa. That's crazy. That means I could care less. That's exactly what you're saying. That's, that's, it's saying thank you for the nothing you just gave me. That's what it really means. But it's like similar. It's very similar. Thank you for that help, that heaping help of nothing. But I do think with songwriting, everyone has their own unique style. I mean, just like in law, I would imagine not every lawyer goes about the courtroom the exact same way. Like, like in the same with parenting. Like your dad definitely parented different than I'm parenting now, but I cannot wait to adopt the way that your dad parented into Marshall. But in songwriting, dude, everybody just has their own style and their own brand. And unless you're writing with people that have the grace to allow you to say some stupid stuff, you're never going to, you're never going to get any better. That's true. Because if you don't say it, it's definitely not going to be put in the song. So you might as well just say it. So we start off every session by saying, hello, there are no dumb ideas in this room. I like that. Yeah. Because you almost have to leave the ego at the door. Yeah. And come in. You're going to go through a lot of terribleness in every session. I don't care how good you are to get to something that's like, that's great. And I feel that's life. I would say that's life. Yes. Right. Now, how does, I want to pick that up for, here you are, the son, which hits different than girls, but you love your girls. You love your son. You have all your kids. Yeah. For me, I feel like I've lived different lives. In each one, I learned just a little bit more and each one, I get a little bit more proud of who I am and what I'm doing and how I'm showing up. Do you find like, in this season, this stage of your life right now is your favorite? Do I feel like this is my favorite? Yeah. Yes. Yeah. I mean, yes. I'm my most true self today than I have ever been. Yeah, I love that. And I think you're going to say that, hopefully, every decade. Yeah. You don't want to be like, oh, this is all right. Well, it was really good. I was way better dude at 25 than I am now. I think if you can't say that every few years and you really have not, you're not doing any work on yourself. And I think it's, you have to do, you have to continue to work on yourself. I mean, I told my 10-year-old daughter the other night, we got in the bed and she was saying something like, why are you, I'm trying to remember how she phrased this, like why do I get in trouble for things but like, but like Lennon doesn't, our six-year-old. And I'm like, baby, unfortunately and unfortunately, you are the oldest. Right. Right. So with that comes great responsibility. With that comes, you're going to do things before everybody else gets to do them. On the flip side of that, this is the first time I'm dealing with it. You know what I'm saying? I've never had a 10-year-old before. So I'm learning this in real time with you. You know what I'm saying? Because you know the whole like model of like the youngest kid always got like less. Dude, I'm the oldest of four. Yeah. Yeah. You kind of are envious of your younger brothers and sisters because they were envious of me. You know, I couldn't wait to get my driver's license and just run to the store and get bread. Correct. You know what I mean? But the youngest got to just. It was me who Saturday mornings had to go with dad to go pick up sticks. Right. From the yard. They were still watching cartoons. But even think about how you hold your first child compared to how you hold your, for me, my fifth child. Oh yeah. Like my first child was like, holy crap. Yeah, you don't know. My fifth child, I'm like, hey. I'm going to grasp. Come here. You know what I'm saying? It's just like every kid becomes less fragile and you start to understand that like, oh, these beings, these creatures are so resilient and so much tougher than we ever give them credit for. But the mental emotional side of it is like, with every kid, I feel like I just become more like, okay, I've experienced this problem before. We've been here. We've been through the lying. We've been through the deception. We've been through all the stuff to where now I'm like, I know exactly how to deal with this with you. Right. Whereas like the oldest kid, you're literally learning it as they're learning it. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? It's a blessing and a curse of being the oldest child, which I am too. Yeah. And I think that's the same way with marriage. 100%. So we've been, this will be 15 years for us. Cool. And I forgot who I was talking to. Congratulations. Oh, thank you. That's a huge feat. Yeah. But it has only been even in these past two years, or I could say even in the last year or six months or whatever, always seems to be the better version. Totally. Because, and I forgot who was I talking to, of who was like, but you all have been married 15 years. I was like, that doesn't mean you got to figure it out. You need even more runway to try and figure things out. It's not like, oh, you already have things figured out. No, I'm, and I have to imagine this is like in, for you as a musician, like you're singing about the things you're learning about, what you're going through right now. I get to teach things that I'm still learning. Totally. Conflict, how to handle disagreements. I'm getting a daily lesson of that every day. And so it is, has to be this impression of you. Do you feel like there are times when it's easier to write it in a song than actually say it to her? Sometimes, but I want to speak to something that you just said, because I feel like, I feel like that is why you are having the success that you're having is because yes, there are people that want to go to someone that has figured it all out. Yeah. But I think people relate so much more to someone that like has wisdom, but is also actively going through the thing that they're talking about. Right. You know what I mean? Like being able to say, I'm still battling with this, but yet here's some ways I'm working on it that is now palatable for the person that has not even begun to work on it. I totally agree with that. You know what I mean? Yeah, absolutely. It's like a lot of the times I feel like the world can just focus on the battle you've been for sure the battle you've been in. And there are times where you presented with the opportunity opportunity to say, yeah, but let me tell you about my victory. That's right. Let me tell you how I came out of it. That's right. Let me tell you how I can share of you think that's bad. I got way worse. Yeah. And let me tell you how I got out of it. Well, just the power of testimony of any kind. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. To know that somebody else has already been in that with you. Yeah. Which is why I think everyone needs an old friend. The oldest of friends. Everyone needs an old man. A dude needs an old man and a woman needs an old woman in their lives that they talk to once a month on the phone. Hands down. I have several. And good. Yeah. I've always been like an old soul for sure. But that, well, I definitely have some old people that I call up when things are going on. We call it in my circles of having a bucket. Yeah. And I call a buddy and just go, I need a bucket. And that means just lay it all out there. Dump it all. Yeah. Dump it all out there. And then you start to sift it and sort it. That's right. But you got to hear from people who've been through it. Otherwise you don't, you lose it. I always feel of, makes me think of growing up. We would have our golf tournaments in high school. The reason I liked going to golf tournaments in high school was because, and I wasn't any good at golf back then, but you got out of school. We go to McDonald's early in the morning and they just came out with, I think the McGriddle. But what a great day. It was so good. It was so good. But there would always be this like round table of old men just meeting to talk about whatever and I just want, that's what I want. And more than likely they have been talking in that same setting for 40 years. At least. And crazy like how the problems or the successes continue to change over that course of time. My wife and I have been a part of a Bible study now for eight years, which I'm learning is a very long time to be in a Bible study. I would say, yeah. With all the like the small group kind of era and everything. Yeah, because like, I mean, between our seven couples in our group, we have like 30 children. That's a lot, dude. Yeah. So like, you're just like homeschool them while you're in Bible study. No, no. I mean, like literally like the amount of like effort we have all put in to be like, hey, Mondays are non-negotiable. Right. It's pretty fascinating to look back at eight years. But like, we, you know, we, I don't know if you journal or anything. I'm a terrible journaler, but like even just like, I mean, yeah, I'm pretty bad at it. Like looking back at like what the prayer requests were. Yeah. Compared to what, first of all, what prayers were answered. And now like, what are our prayer requests now are so different than they were seven years ago. Perspective. But just growing. Yeah. Growing with a group of people that are doing life similarly is such a blessing to me. So. And I find that even one, absolutely two. I do that a lot with Sierra and I, the things that I can look back, we prayed for a year for a year ago or the conversations we've even had six months ago. Totally. And the way that that's been tracked and either things that we thought were a big deal got handled and the things that we thought were the biggest thing it was going on. Yeah. We missed it. You know what I mean? Isn't that so funny? Like, but why do we continue to think that the things moving forward are still such a big deal? Yeah. Think about all the battles you went through and now you can look back at them and laugh, but you're still sort of doing the same things. But for some reason you can't laugh about them in the moment. They still become this like world crumbling thing that when you make it through, you're like, oh, this is just like all the other world crumbling things that happened in the last decade. Right. Are you like, I always, I don't know the dynamic between you and Lauren of like, I'm the, it's going to be fine. We're going to have to plan out every single scenario and she's thought about it a million times more than I ever have. Yeah. Do you find like, how do your personalities balance each other? I'm your wife. Oh yeah. And my wife is you. She's just like, it's going to be fun. We're going to just going to be good. Yeah. Which I feel like that's, I feel like that's kind of the biggest work I've been trying to do on myself is like, because I do know that my, you know, overattention to things like my wife would say, I have a lack of attention to detail, but I have a lack of attention to detail of things that I don't care about. But if I care about them, I have an OCD attention to the detail. Like I'm like, what are we, you know, if we're going on like a vacation, Lauren's like, we'll just figure it out when we get there. I'm like, no, we're going to Italy. Like you have to plan Italy. You can't just show up and run. We're definitely swamped. And be like, we're just going to, I don't know, we'll try this gelato out. Exactly. Can we get on the phone with the travel agent? Maybe in next week, I'm like, no, like today. Yeah, right. You know, so I would say I'm a lot like. I definitely, I'm a lot like you are. The definitely vibes. I think this, this is good for our relationship. I can already see what's going to work out. Before we keep going, I want to take a moment to tell you about Upwork. You grow, you and your business grow, not by doing more things, but by doing the right things and letting go of the rest. And I know what I struggle with sometimes in several businesses that I've begun is that delegation is a problem because I would rather sometimes spend way too long, too many hours trying to look up how to do something or work some other platform when I could have just gone to Upwork. 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You know what I'm saying? They decide for you. They kind of decide for you of just kind of like, if you were, and maybe I'm wrong on this, but I would like to think that if you went out in Nash right now and polled 100 people, but like, hey, when I say the name Thomas Rhett, what do you think of? They'd be like, oh, his wife. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Right. Okay. What else? His kids, his beautiful kids. Yeah. They're like, okay, what else? Music? No. You know what I'm saying? Maybe. Doesn't he sing? Doesn't he sing? Does he even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even even way that we that we project this way we you know market all the stuff and so for me it's been interesting to find this balance of like okay well when I post a picture of like my family on Easter Sunday it's gonna get a sheload of engagement right but if I post a picture of a video of a new song maybe it's not gonna connect as much and so for me I have to find this like weird balance of like but I still do this for a living yeah you know what I'm saying because I think people have sort of labeled our family like I mean couple goals yeah you know dream family goals right all this kind of stuff and so when that is your perception you sort of innately come back in your house and when things are not going well you're like you kind of in your mind go but I thought we were the perfect family right I thought I was the perfect exactly exactly I think Sam yeah yeah everybody says I am everybody says I am yeah and so it is fascinating dude because there we live such a normal life like as normal as we can yeah to have done the things that we've got to do yes I would like to think that we are very normal I understand that our some of our ways of traveling are different and some of the places we stay are different but like I feel like we are so insanely normal and my kids think that we are so insanely normal that when we go places and people want to take pictures with me and our kids are just like what the frick is happening all right my six year old was like why these people like you yeah yeah I'm like well you know do you know that I sing right exactly I mean yeah yeah like and you know I mean and so like I'm trying in this in this season to like kind of really teach my kids really what do I do for a living because it is fascinating yeah if you were to ask your kid hey what does daddy do for a living right exactly I'll be curious to hear their response we always say daddy just helps people that's right because when they stop and my daughter is very vocal and she'd be like do you know her yeah you know what I mean and I'm like well kind of yeah we know each other and daddy helps you know like that's kind of but they also think like my kids think that because I'm a singer that I just have everyone's phone number oh I love that you should just whoever can come over for lunch tomorrow right oh there we go you know I mean I get that last I mean it was last week or maybe it was Easter Sunday one of my kids was like do you think the Jonas brothers are gonna come tomorrow for Easter I'm like no probably not they're like but you sing yeah and I'm like yep and so I'm trying to like I'm trying to like really take them through the weeds of like what I actually do for a living yeah like singing is this much of it right writing is this much of it yeah planning meetings are this much of it all the tour design like all the stuff and so now that they they're starting to understand that oh my job is more than just singing now all the sudden my kids are like my 10 year old other night was like well I want to be a designer and I'm gonna not design dresses I want to be the CEO of my company I was like where you learn the word CEO you're like I'm gonna live in Paris for a year there we go and move to London and then I have eight kids yeah I was like oh that's awesome perfect how old is she she's 10 yeah I love that yeah I love that my six year old last night was like um I think I'm gonna move to California for a little bit and then maybe if you're still in Tennessee maybe I might come say hi yeah and then I was like okay yeah she's already thought this like way out way farther than I need to I was like you mean you're not gonna stay with me yeah like you know she's like no I would I why would I do that but no back to your quite I think it's just like perception versus reality is a tough um yeah and I I'll share like mine of I will here I have a platform I talk about how to have good communication yeah and how to handle conflict yeah in arguments in model recovery and how do you how do you repair after an argument and and then it's really easy to get into an disagreement because you're married to another human and it's like well okay Mr. communication that's right you know what I'm saying and then it's like it's it's has to be hard to have here y'all are putting this hashtag couple goals and then sure because you're married and human you get into an argument all of a sudden it's wait we're hashtag couple goals what are we doing yeah and then it's easy to because you got kids yeah and it's bath time and it's whatever else yeah and I think to that there's a there's a there's a quote that says what does it say bled versus cursed is the man who is a prophet overseas but a burden in his own home oh yeah yeah yeah I don't know who wrote that but it's pretty brilliant to me and it's like it's like what kind of capacity and what space are you giving to use your talents in your workplace but not for sure in your house was it Paul I think it was it might have been like maybe I think it was a yeah yeah what a guy how well but yeah dude I mean it's it's like it's so easy to probably like me to sit here with you and just be like the nicest dude in the world right but if I can't take that mentality and bring it back into my house because it's like the the old saying of mm-hmm I want to be known and loved the most by the people that love and know me the most yeah you know I'm saying that's so good and it's like you're your best self in front of complete strangers right but you're your worst version of yourself in front of the people that admiring respect you the most yeah there's a question I always try to ask myself is is are my fans or my family getting the best version of me and that's like buddy that is the whole the world loves to talk about work life balance yeah I don't believe in it yeah yeah I don't what do you believe I believe that you have to sort of be a hundred percent committed where your feet are yeah so if you're at home you have to be a hundred percent that guy right you know I mean like I think that it's it's a it's a slippery slope to me to be like oh I can take a couple phone calls yeah on a Saturday yeah that's while my kids are playing t-ball in the backyard mm-hmm because those couple calls turn into an all-day thing yeah and then all the sudden I find myself in my studio writing a song that was an idea that came to my brain and then before I know it yeah the weekend is over and I spent no time with my children right or just just a little bit yeah I find like I've I think you would be somebody who would support this in the last year in particular for me I wouldn't buy this idea of what's best for the business is what's best for the family and what I have gone through man I have it is bright line red clear to me of it's the opposite what's best for the family is what's best for the business of like what you're doing right now what's best for your your children yeah and Lauren is what carries through everything else and how different that is a hundred percent because think about it like this like if you're if your job I'm trying to word this right if things are right in the home right and like you're spending not quantity time you're spending quality time with your family it could be super limited to right like even if you only get a couple hours a weekend but but it's like in very very very intentional that's so much more than you just like kind of being there for a week just having it you're saying and so like if your wife feels loved and known if your kids feel loved and known and seen all the sudden when you walk out the door to go to work your family's going go get them dad right compared to it's that thing yeah like he's going to do the thing that continues to take away from us right so make sense no I'm right there with you man I'm so I can because I've lived that too before we get going I want to take a moment to tell you about element which as Mike gets call it salty water element is an easy way to stay hydrated comes in packs also in like 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to drink element calm that was such a bad dad joke head to drink element calm slash Jefferson to try it risk-free that's drink lmnt.com slash Jefferson let's keep going I've heard you speak on kind of this transition of things you didn't do as well in marriage and relationship and family and now you're at a place where you feel like you do well so what what is the thing in your mind you felt like you had to unlearn to be where you are now I was on the phone I hope she's okay with me sharing this and if it's not y'all can just yeah we can cut whatever yeah but I was on the phone with Miranda Lambert the other day yeah she's kind of weirdly always been not weirdly she's been an amazing friend ever since I started in this business that's cool I was kind of seven or eight years behind her so she's always been doing it eight to ten years longer than me yeah so she's always had a ten-year sort of wisdom gap ahead of me or whatever and I called her the other day just talk about music the road touring like at what point do you like not do a 50-show tour like at what point do you decide maybe we can't maybe we can't sell 20,000 tickets you know we were having this conversation and they started talking about man I just feel like I end up just saying yes always for the sake of more yeah and she said she said let me just remind you that there's no such thing as a country music emergency that's good and I love I freaking love that quote because it's not just a country music emergency yeah she was like you're not a doctor like you're not going in to do a heart transplant tonight you got you're not curing cancer you're literally deciding should I do this podcast or should I not yeah you know what I mean really zoom out a thousand feet kind of go oh that's really not a big deal yeah and more than likely there will be another opportunity to do something else down the line that matches up better with my schedule and so I think the thing that I had to unlearn is that if if I said no eight to ten years ago which I didn't say no eight to ten years ago always yes I've had to I've had to unlearn that just because it's a good opportunity doesn't mean it's the best opportunity yeah and so I've been very very fortunate with such an amazing team right that sort of knows where my rankings are on my like family work stuff to where it's like they have done a great job at just presenting me with a lot of different options me like hey we believe that this is great we believe that this is a lot of good exposure we believe this we believe this and so they present the options we get and then we haven't done this great but we have now started trying to do once a month sitting down not just with me but with my wife because I'm not a good communicator I'm one of those people that will say yeah yes to a million things and get super fired up about this thing and super about about this and then I get home and I'm like oh I really need to talk to learn about this yeah yeah when yes when are we gonna do that yes we get in the bed at night yeah it was happening are we gonna do that are we trying to watch silo season three you know I'm saying and it just ends up not getting talked about and then by the time that whole busy week that we plan gets there right everyone's in shock you know I'm saying yeah my wife goes when did you plan all this like oh couple months ago yeah she's like why didn't I mean we don't have we don't have a babysitter like I'm like oh shoot yeah and then I just scramble and then I cancel and then I become this like very unreliable right doesn't make sense dude I lived that okay okay yeah like in the last six months all right because what would happen is they would say of course my scale much smaller on tour and and everything else of they'd ask me can you be on this show podcast whatever and I go yeah yeah yeah and then or I'd say hold off and then I'd ask Sierra and she'd be like oh that's Ruby's dancer's title you know like or this is not a dancer so but like this is a program at school I'm getting stressed out yeah and and I'm like I'm like oh it is okay and then I'd have to go tell somebody that's not a good day and then have to come back with a different day and it was like they just put me in a impossible position and so what we've done is now Sierra is like the number one filter yeah of protecting her job is chief number one of like any schedule things any publicity things yeah any of your stuff like that once a month meeting or whatever it all runs through her so it's I don't let me make a scheduling decision because her brain has the capacity yeah to handle all the tabs for sure and open and and that just makes my life and our life mm-hmm like that much better or able able to do that yeah a hundred percent man I I do have to tell you this number one song that gets played on my house is your nothing else with force Frank oh dude my kids love we all but it's all right every morning same every morning is for strength every morning and so I have to say not much like inspiring music out there that feels like you're listening to Fetty Wap at the same time you know I'm saying you can just blast on the Monday right right it's just age-appropriate for everybody yeah exactly and so I'll be making eggs just going man I'm having this is that's right yeah I do have to say I am encouraged and I'm proud to see what I have seen and that is more leaning into your faith and being more I think just more God focused in your message and I think that's something as somebody watching from the outside man I'm so proud dude I think I think that's just that's just awesome because that's hard that's really hard of like what what do you what if you're not the Thomas Rhett that people fell in love with 13 years ago or whatever I like you're in these different life stages and phases and you're in different phase of marriage and everything and some a lot of that too is faith for sure yeah man it's you know it's it's always been a part of me I mean ever ever ever since I was young like I I mean I think I got I got baptized when I was eight I'm not totally sure I knew what it meant yeah I think I got married like right at that age yeah and then but I don't mean I've always believed but I don't think that my like faith got really real until I was like a sophomore in college and then you know when I got on the road it was always a part of me but it never was as like I'm never was as a vocal yeah you know and for some reason I don't know what it is about the human brain turning 30 like do you know the science behind there is like is my brain fully developed now yeah I don't 36 year old man I think maybe I think it's we're just coming online yeah I don't I don't know if it was it was either turning 30 or me turning 30 during COVID you know oh COVID warped me yeah like in the worst way and in the best way humanly possible I think that like that year as hard as it was God did so many things in my life that year that I did not know they were happening while they were happening right even just like that year I feel like so much of my identity and what I did was completely stripped away from me you know what I'm saying yeah I was talking to Harry about this other day but the things that we did for money that year were so hilarious yeah like the sponsorship deals we did I played on zoom calls for corporate companies like 10,000 people and you can't see any of them yeah just in your basement alone like just jamming and they would like unmute it and you would hear like that you know and you're like what the break are we doing what's happening but you know when you're in the middle of COVID you really you really did I really did not believe that we were ever gonna ever be able to go do anything ever again yeah like I was so warped and but God like every month just keep stripping me and keep stripping me and keep stripping me and just remind me like hey first and foremost your husband hey first and foremost your father hey first first and foremost your son your friend and then comes this thing singer right I was at a conference last week ever heard John Max will speak I have buddy like I don't know if you're a fan or not but like the way the way that he kind of presented this to me was pretty wild or maybe not to me but it was just like as part of a conference and he was just like I guess when he was kind of getting going early on in his career get a mentor that flew out to meet him and he was like hey John and you know it sounds like things are going pretty well you know you're a lot of people are coming to church and all that kind of stuff yeah I'm doing pretty good and he was like yeah and it sounds like when you need to deliver the sermons people people like it a lot and they're like yeah we're getting a pretty good reaction you know and he was like I bet you think you're pretty amazing don't you it's like you know I don't know he's like let me remind you you are not amazing yeah you're not amazing your gifts are amazing but those gifts were given freely to you and that was a huge message that I feel like I learned during covid is like I guess it's me it's my voice it's my songs and so that stuff but those are all gifts that were given to me freely you know I'm saying so and I and so I don't remember what you're talking about but I guess like after covid was when I just sort of I couldn't really not be vocal about my faith anymore yeah and I'm not I'm not a preacher but any means you don't got to be me I'm not a preacher you don't gotta be you just got to follow him but the more I the more I read and the more I walked just more intimately with the Lord it just sort of it just started flowing out of me differently than it had before covid well I know you have you know a lot of music that's inside of you still and things that I think you're gonna yeah bring out and it's not gonna be you it's gonna be your gifts gifts that do it that's right I'm gonna look forward to watching a man thanks man yeah thank you buddy I really really appreciate it was just all the best to you and your family and especially your new son thanks congratulations I appreciate it thanks you