Ep 589 - Broke Mind Virus

Wow, wow, Wes. All right. Hello. Hey. Hello, we're live now, dude. How much does Nate's brother look like? Doctor, you want to talk to him? I thought it was a good doctor for sure. When your brother walked in, and of course I know him, so that's how I knew him, but when he walked in, I was like, oh, shit. I thought it was Doctor Uma. And then the good doctor, you guys, you and your brother put on the fucking dipship, brother. You and your brother are the dipship, brother. My brother, I don't know how. He usually holds it together. I did what I do, but him, that was out of care. Right before right before I go on stage, he comes walking through the puts his arm around Nate's shoulder, can't walk, going through the tunnel. I go get him a chair, we sit down. I turn around, he falls out of the chair. Yeah, he never hit the chair. I try to put him in the chair without any just like the prank. And like leg just still up on the chair. That was like a medical pass out though. Yeah, it was. Yeah, Nate. Yeah, Nate cried. I didn't cry, but I didn't cry. I don't know. Shit, he's here, right? Nate goes, I don't know. It wasn't that bad, but I did hear that. I was worried about him. He would, I don't even know. Help. I saw, I've never seen, I didn't say help. I didn't say help. Somebody called me, I didn't know. I was thinking about it first. I was like, I can't go on stage. Nate's brother just died. Yeah, the good doctor. No, Shane AI stepped over him. I didn't step over him. I didn't step over him. Uh-huh. He's all right. He popped. I don't know if you heard it, but he popped up. He popped up and was like, I wasn't on the ground. That was the first thing he said. Yeah, I didn't pass out. And it passed out. As fellow big guys, we were both celebrating the fact that his belly did not fall. Yeah, yeah, that was good. That was a good look. Exactly. It's like, laying on your side that big. It's like, it's like, curvature is a rough look. Yeah, he landed on his back. He got a lovely head. Yeah, it was too his. You were the father, your belly hitting the floor. Yeah, it's so eye-catching. I remember it was just lagging the air. Yeah, you were pure panic. Yeah, it sucks. Yeah, I mean, he wants to bounce back. I was still. Nate passing out. Sust, dude. Passing out is suss. That's what Joe's saying. I was watching Jim Joe's podcast. Dude, the old black guys are flying into the podcast game. They figured out the code. All you got to do is call each other gay the whole time. And they're making millions already. We've been doing it for a decade. Welcome, brothers. They're just coming in and talking. Wait, you pass out. It's kind of fucking gay. You pass it. I never pass out. Fuck, pass it out. Let's just gaze out. Fuck, that is actually my whole ass. My whole ass. Now, old black dudes, they've been doing it forever. The pause. They're the pause minds. Pause in each other is the best. What's the best? Jayden Kitson and Fat Joe's podcast is just so fat Joe gets paused not so. He says wild. He's crazy. He says wild. He's doing it on purpose. I really think so. He probably has a staff of writers being like, write me the gay as shit. You can possibly think of. But now Nate's brother bounced back and then Nate picked up the torch. Bro, he said, how can I make a bigger fool of my family? Who's rolling around on the couch? I saw. Well, you say roll like I couldn't. You were standing right there. You fall over the couch like a scuba diver. You would like like going. Oh, shit. You'd fall backwards. I didn't know you got you were a drunk. We're on the plane together. You know why scuba diver is you know how they sit on the boat and fall backwards. Yeah. Look cool. Now because if they fell for it, they would land in the boat. Come on, guys. Classic highlight reel. Twenty five. Joe, girl, glib it. Highlight reel. Twenty twenty five. He's running that back. Twenty five times. That's what we'll do for the new year. Over and over for three hours. You fall asleep to it. But you're gonna laugh every time. You try sleeping. Now Phil hit me with that. Phil hit me in gerbys with that. That is great. We were watching a shit. He was watching some fucking bullshit travel show. He was watching like a show about cruise ships. And then a show I was like, dude, you want to go on a cruise so bad. Do you know about the guy who just died on a cruise? No. He had on record 33 drinks because I guess they want to do it. And they back to the black podcast. That's kind of gay, dude. Well, dude, they shot him with an anti-psychotic. So he was, he had fully rodeo bulled himself. He just got 33 drinks in. He's getting his fucking money to earth. Honestly, he's not the wrong with that. And then they tried to like subdue him. And apparently they gave him an injection. Oh, that'll kill you. Yeah, that's two things combined, which is like, first of all, if you're going to subdue anyone on a cruise ship, it's probably going to be from alcohol. Why would you have a thing that does that? Secondly, why don't they have a Narcan version of alcohol that as soon as you give someone it, they're just like, what? God, that'd be bad. I'd carry it around. I'd just be like, all right, well, that's coke. But yeah, you just say, you know, that is coke. People go, I'm a little too drunk. I'm back. I can't wait. What do you guys want to talk about? But no one would take it. If you're drunk, you're like, yeah, you got to take your anti alcohol. You'd be like, yeah, fuck it. I'm fine. I'm just feeling sick. He could have used it on natives. Yeah, did you roll all over the couch? We could have, we should have Narcan ate dude. Alp on the air, and you got on the plane going, I'm sober. I had to take care of my brother this whole time. I was kind of, you were not. I really felt sober. We talked about me and Matthew. Yeah, I talked about it. Because not sober. You were drinking, when we got into the green room, you poured a glass of liquor. True. You were drinking the entire show. And then you did those. You did a couple of poppers in the bathroom. I knew you were popping. You were popping. You were popping. You were popping. You took poppers and juicy with your brother. Don't point daddy on that. Yeah, you were like, real lines and juicy before the show. And then you had GHB Lace Baby Oil. You got to start traveling with like a, just a milk cart of baby oil. You got to do something. What the hell? God damn. I'm not going to get that. We're never going to get this podcast. We're going to get this thing just the busiest day of the whole show. That was a, that was a, a thwarted of knock too. You see what that is. Hmm? It sounds good so far. What's fucking. I know what the hell that, maybe you guys ordered something? No, it's probably birthday bullshit. You think so? It's like a hat and like a, says for G. It must be Italian. Oh. Oh, man. Put it 2025. 2025. 2025. 2025. 2025. Joe Crowe. Clip it up. Damn, dude. Stop sending me boxes. I know. Just crap. We're boxes. Just fucking crap. All right. So Nate, you and your brother were snorning poppers. You kissed. You think that's how Nate welcome up. He was a little fucking prank starving. For you. For you. Yeah. Kiss my lips. He came back to life. Kiss the boat. It's for him. Yeah. You did handle it. I didn't like the way you were handling. You were saying nasty things to your brother. He just died. Once I knew he was okay, that's how I had to start. He was sitting there coming back to the fucking life. And you were standing over him being like, you fucking piece of shit. Hey, dumb ass, fucking fainted pussy. I didn't do that. Why are you making me say that? I was shaking my head at him. No, he was like, give me that 25% of the company back. He ain't fucking in here. He went full ditty on his brother. Who got that baseball bat? I had to take advantage of being a big bro for one hour. That was, he's like older than me by enough then. You couldn't handle the success. He immediately blacked out and rolled around. You were laying on this couch. You passed out. I grabbed you by the legs and pulled you as hard as I could. Lost the check immediately. Valley Gamer. Lost his paycheck from the show. Why didn't forget that? Actually, we think about that every day. True. Yeah, you guys get on that. Yeah. But no, I was shocked. We got back and it was just like, thinking everything was cool. And then all of a sudden, I looked over, you're on the couch just like, like a fish out of water just surrounded around on the deck. What the fuck? Flapping around and everyone was going, Nate, what are you doing? You're going, isn't this funny? We were like, no, dude, it's kind of embarrassing. I mean, bro, in different entertainment circles, you would have gotten clapped. Yeah. You've gotten fully clapped. I know I was in a safe space. You wouldn't have won, man. I know I wasn't in no clapped. You wouldn't have been in the camera. You wouldn't have been facing you 10 years from now. You'd be like, I don't know what happened. I was. I was. I was. I was in a safe space. You wouldn't have won, man. I was in a no clapped. You wouldn't have been in the camera been facing you 10 years from now. You'd be like, I don't know what happened. I was. I was. I was. I was. I could have clapped him. Anyone could have clapped him. Anyone could have. Anyone. Anyone could have been in the lady with a strap on. Could have clapped you. What did you get clapped? That's a good one. Nice. I paid a watch out. I did eat that. I'd take an XC and watch you get clapped for 3 days. 3 days. What were they taking? They were taking him clapped for 3 days. What were they taking? They were taking him clapped for 3 days. What were they taking? They were taking him clapped for 3 days. What were they taking? They were taking him clapped for 3 days. What were they taking? What were they taking? What were they taking? gifts food and most importantly sports. We got bowl games, basketball matchups, playoff pushes, it's all going on. And while you and I are out here making decisions every day, like how much turkey is too much to... There is one place where it feels good to be right. Prize picks. God, Matt, could you just riff for me, daddy, on talk about something Prize picks offers in the app that you love lately? I just love the more or less. And I love, that's always, that's like the, you know, flat-chip feature. I do love the fact that they have another feature where I believe you can like completely get out of something if the player's not performing well. Yeah, something like that. Yeah, I like that one too. It's a good features. Sweet riff. Matt, is your fantasy season over already? My team is cooked. This couldn't be written for me because my team's in first place. But with Prize picks, I don't have to wait until next year's draft. Prize picks have something to play every week. Pick your favorite players and teams all season long. Think about that. Download the Prize picks app today and use code Drench to get $50 in lineups after you play your first $5 lineup. That's code Drench to get $50 in lineups after you play your first $5 lineup. Prize picks is good to be right. What's up, Malfa? I do like how, I do like how did he like slowly bring the mail escort over, let the mail escort it, obviously, cookie or whatever. But then like how he slowly got involved is so funny. Just punishing her for liking it. It's your lunch. Good lord. The most diabolical thing was, if you haven't seen the doc, go watch it. Yeah, it's pretty great. Most diabolical to me, obviously, maybe killing pock, whatever. Yeah, what? Pretty bad. Making Biggie's family the estate pay for the funeral. And then dancing on the fucking VMAs. Oh. It is amazing though how he like, right after that happened, he became like truly, I mean, he was already obviously famous, but then he became like a real music superstar in his own right. And it's like watching that him dancing around on stage and all white. He was kind of like, this guy sucks dick at dancing. People like, he was a professional dancer. I was like, these terrible. This is the worst dance. He's not a professional dancer. Did you all notice he stole the Rolling Stone cover from him too? Like after he died, he was like, I need it now. He had a business, he had a business around. I get that. He had a business around. Things don't just stop. Gotta keep a movement. Did. And the clips of him and fucking Ellen, what was that? That's like daytime television for, you know, I don't know. She was like grabbing, she's like, what are you grabbing there? Your piece? Oh, yeah, somebody's got to do it. Yeah, that was a freaks. She left the country? For Shisha and Garofa. What? Allegedly, she's in Europe or something like that. Why'd she leave? Because everybody was such a nice mean. But she's mean, is she had to go? I elected the second time she left. Yeah, but it's an excuse. Everyone said she was mean. Yeah, I heard she was just nasty. She got exiled for being a meanie. Had to go back to Europe. Gotta go back. Your lineage ends here. Back to the old country. Start over. Try again. How about you change your attitude and come back? Yeah, don't be mean this time, Ellen. I mean, how mean was she? I feel like so many people in the TV were home are probably pretty fucking mean. Like, how mean are we talking? Is there any specific examples of like... Yeah, off-memory. I remember she was like sort of like a no-eye contact in the hallway sort of boss. Like, don't look at me. That's just lesbian alpha. Yeah, yeah. That's what lesbian alpha is. I obviously didn't know anything wrong with it. I'll look it up, she if I can find anything. Yeah, that's just like contact in the hallway. That's fully acceptable. Yeah. Oh, sexual misconduct. Hold on now. What kind of... What was she doing? I just read the headline real fast, I'm sorry. March 2020 is during quarantine. Squip, Twitter. Just peeking. That's so crazy. That's insane. What? You were just on your hands and knees in the bathroom. You came. What's in my hand? Now you're on Ellen's ass. What are you bed over? You got to fucking get down there to puke. You did hands on the hips. You did a Kimber? You did my Karina. It went full T-pipe. So, okay, so Ellen, only no eye contact, which I totally fucking get and possibly I think we should in state here. Yeah. Specifically during the podcast. I don't like looking at you guys. No eye contact. I mean, yeah, that kind of sums it all up. Fear-based environment. Producers allegedly being rude, dismissive or discriminatory. People getting fired or taking for taking medical leave or bereavement leave. So basically just being a big person. Depends what type of bereavement. Yeah, I guess. Yeah, my opinion. Yeah, man. Sounds like it. So it's like my fucking, my Nana died. Like how old was she? She's like 105. Get in here. Yeah, you're going to work. Get in here. You're lucky to go to the funeral. Get in here. Remember, Greg Fitzsimmons used to work for her and he was like, yes, she was fucking nuts. Fitzsdaugh? Yeah, allegedly. And there's a controversy about her DJ. Did you ever see that guy? Yes. My mommy used to love Ellen, so I used to watch it a lot. And she had Twitch who was a DJ who would dance with her and stuff. Yeah. And he committed suicide, I think, at a nowhere and he had like a family. It was really sad stuff. Yeah. So what are you saying? I'm saying I'm fucking, are you learning to... You think Ellen did that? I don't know. She didn't do that. Yeah, I think Ellen, I don't know. I think she found his car in Vegas and paid the Southside Crips to take him out. I don't know. She might have called the head up. Never paid the Crips. How crazy is that? Yeah. What am I? He's truly a fucking crazy idiot. I was just thinking about that. How that is like, I mean, again, if all of this is true, which you know, a lot of the points do you line up, it's like, that's the worst guy ever to not pay you and then just fuck you afterwards. It's one thing not to get paid with stink, but then if he just starts like, fucking you, I'd be like, dude, what the fuck, man? You mean like literally fucking you? Yeah, like fucking you. Yeah. Literally fucking you. After not paying you, I'm like, I want to fuck you. Yeah, DJ, that DJ that was on the boat for a while. I don't know what happened to him. He was getting drugged. He's getting paid now. He said he was like, I went, I took this thing thing and I was going to get money to change my family's life. It's like, well, you might get it, man. That's determination. That's making the band. That's making the band. That's making the band. But I love the Diddy voice man, I was telling him a great thing. It's like, bro, I love you. Why the fuck are you doing this? I'm gonna pay you. What the fuck, man? I remember you, you were so funny, we hung out. Somebody be like, can I get paid? The album's out. Yeah, him and his, that was my favorite era. As him and like post making the band when he was just 50, just like still getting after it was really funny. Yeah, he was, when he was dressed like the jail carer on around screaming at people. Yeah, you could see something was coming down the pike on that one. That was a clear mental breakdown. Well, he's gonna get out and murder everybody. He thinks so? Yeah, definitely. We can't, because everyone makes documentaries and proofs. He probably wants to kill himself. He's gonna do that, that like b-roll of him, like kind of present day. Apparently there's 140 hours of that stuff. So I think there's a lot more. That's what we were talking about. What was the baby oil doing in the, basically in the fucking like the control room? Like this is, things are going bad. It's the war room. It was the war room and it's like, don't forget XC and baby oil. Just in case we have like a fun night during the trial. I mean, once you get the baby oil's going, it's hard to like not. You kind of want that on deck. And God forbid things go south. Let's get a good baby oil sash with my grown son. I agree with that. That's the craziest to have in your boy. Just bring your boy into it. Yeah. And then like during that, when his son was like, we gotta do something. We gotta say something. He was like, God told me to be quiet. You do whatever you gotta do. I gotta respect that. Just fucking abandoning yourself. He's going to do what you gotta do. God told him to bring 14 jars of baby oil. He said there's a whole ocean of oil under my top. I've abandoned my boy. Yeah, I mean, that's the most, I can't think of a worse thing to come out about anybody. You think YouTube comedy docs are rough? Try getting 50 cent on your ass with some fucking B roll. He's the ultimate fucking. He's the ultimate. Yeah, you think that's right of it. His style is actually very unoriginal. It's like, bro, whatever. After seeing the 50 cent shit, I'm like, man, I don't care. Last thing you want is 50. He killed everybody. All your favorite rappers, he killed those guys. Didn't pay anyone and raped everybody. And you're like, dude, this is bad. He's murdering rapists. It's crazy. Gay. You go, hold on a second. I'm not gay. Not as I like a lot in the documentary a lot of times. When he's like, when people are like complaining about him, he'll be like, man, he's just broke mindset. He's just broke mindset. The guys you didn't pay in the fuck. They have broke ideas. These broke, what the fuck are you fucking? I ain't fucking them. What are they talking about? That's what happens. You get so broken, nobody's going to make that up. No dude is going to be like, yeah, and then he fucked me. That one, you don't talk to that one in. No, that's crazy, bro. That's crazy. Apparently the guy, like you see the guy rushed it. He was talented. It's a real accusation. Yeah, it is. You're a dude, a straight dude. And then going, I don't even want to talk. All in the doc, I don't even want to talk. I don't want to get into that. But going, I woke up and I was a little, that's exactly what a dude would say. I was just sore. I don't want to talk about it. It's like, fuck man. Fuck, man. But yeah, he is in for a rough one. He's already, they're already trying to like challenge, you know, they're probably trying to sue Netflix right now. Big time. Did he's team? Who's a team? He's a cis, apparently. Who is a Dershowitz? Defender. Well, apparently, he fucked his lawyer that not like literally, but since he, he definitely didn't pay his lawyers. But footage, like, kind of exposes the lawyer of like bad practice and stuff like that, because there's like personal or like what we're supposed to be private conversations that the guy was just filming the whole time and 50 put those in the doc too. Filming himself with his lawyer. See what the hell was that about? I don't know, but it fucked the lawyer. I heard really on the internet. Yeah, apparently he's not too happy about it. Fucking bad, dude. Also, yeah, obviously, dang, that sucks, man. It'll be a lawyer stinks because then like you're just, you're the guy advocating for the guy and then I was like, what a fucking asshole. Yeah. Because his dream team, he did have a nice dream team. Also, I do respect being a trial and just looking at the jury going, I know. And it works. Well, that girl that was on there, the jury was like, dude, he's did he's fucking sick. He kept looking at me. We were making the same face. That was funny. Like we both made the same face like, what? The girl who was crying, that was like, I got kidnapped. And the whole jury was like, there's like, a broke mind set clearly broke mind set. It was a broke mind virus. The broke mind virus got into the jury. The jury did not have to broke mind. They were fucking paid alphas. We got the most, it was nothing but the most extreme hustlers. Is the old Indian guy? They were in love. Yeah. Classic love story. Shout out to fucking diddy's jury, and his team of lawyers, for jury selection being like fucking Pakistani immigrant, get him the fuck on there. He's not going to give a fuck about that fucking video of Cassie getting it. Because you shouldn't have left the room. Fucking she leave. He was in the middle of a bath. I was never leaving a husband while he bathed. There are many oils. Oh, there are many oils in his house. That was a fine news, oil. They were to stack that jury with 12 angry Indians. The Indian dudes were just fully like free diddy. He's totally innocent, dude. What do you fucking hit a couple of girls? I know. They were in love and they did crazy things. And he was also like, and you cannot take all the glitz and glam or take it one way or the other. She could leave. It's like he literally kidnapped his assistant. Like, I'll kill her if you don't come outside. Oh, man. Yeah, the one thing that really kind of rocked my socks is when the assistant was like, yeah, I saw this fucked up shit, but I didn't want to say anything just like for the culture. And I'm like, what the fuck are you for the culture? What are you talking about? You guys want to, we have representatives of the culture here. Would you guys like to speak on the culture? Scared to reach for it. I will. Yes. What the culture, dude? I don't got nothing to say. You got kidnapped a gunpoint and to try to murder a kid, Cuddy. You didn't want to tell anybody for the culture. That was that lady. She did it for the bag. You think it was the bag? Yeah. That's what I was. It was just a crazy excuse to be like, yeah, I did see him beat the fuck out of his girlfriend. He kidnapped me, but it's like, you know, just like overall for the culture. It's like, what you're not going to tell about the murderous rapist. That didn't feel like a real sense. That felt like like meant. Yeah, then like made for the culture. You think Capricorn was cappin'? True name is capp, dude. You know, single thing you said. That cracked me up though. I was like, what the fuck is that? What are you talking about? Every time I hear that, I'm like, dude, what are you saying? What the hell are you saying? It's truly like, it's crazy. It's insanity. It's fucking pure insanity. It's very funny. It's what we're obviously. It's for the culture. It's like, what are you talking about? White people have to start holding that down. Next time there's like a white collar crime, like Anron, it's like, dude, we couldn't, we, it's for the culture, bro. I knew there was insider trading. I knew they were doing all this for the culture, bro. Yeah, we did loans, Zambebi, a fucking $7 million at 4,000. Zambebi. The fuck are you from, Zambebi? Yeah, man, it's rough, man. A lot of the OG black entertainers, the line is drawn in the sand. The dude's coming out to like, speak up for Ditty or just getting absolutely destroyed. I would never want B for 50, sad man. I just don't, I just don't want it. Cause they're coming out and they're going like, it's fucking obviously is clearly bullshit and just they're getting just sure. It's like the worst thing they can possibly, why would they speak up for him right now? Are they on, that's my thing. Are they on cam? Tony A was at the mothership on Tuesday. He's doing like a press tour. He's doing like all the pie, I don't know. Who's at the, who's at the mothership? Obviously, Tony A, the genius. But not young buck, they've been, young buck in a, they've been beefing with young buck. Yeah. To the neck. Yeah, so it's like, it's Matt's hip hop, Claw and the tree. Get around now, y'all. Beasts are over like, trans stuff. Young buck, that was hardly outgain. The also the thing is this, every one of these like hip hop fucking beef is purely internet speculation. Yeah, it's very fun to just be like, wasn't it over trans stuff and somebody was gay? Yeah. That's fuck. But that usually kind of is part of it. Unfortunately, it is coming out that it is mostly that. So, but yeah, that documentary man, that was great. I was very well done. When you started up and you're going, how the fuck did he get this video? Still it, there's people are trying to get the source, people are trying to figure out who it was and they're getting close, but. Who the videographer, who the videographer was, he's in trouble. I don't think so. Bro, he's gonna get shot. He thinks I can shot. Yeah, but he's gonna kill everyone. But he doesn't pay anybody. It's in the thing being like, it doesn't matter. Yeah, true. He never cared about, he'll kill you. Yeah, true. Although he has to hire henchmen, where's he gonna get the henchmen at? The henchmen are gonna go, like they always have, be like, he's gonna give me a million bucks. True, true. Fuck, he didn't pay me. Yeah, the henchmen afterwards, I'm not gonna tell him, though, this is the culture. Yeah, true. If the henchmen, if it was true, their story that they killed Tupac and then sat right outside, watched the ambulance pull up, and then just went and smoke weed and partied, it was fucking wild. They were bad henchmen, yeah. They were good. They got rid of it. Perfect. They stood there. They were the best henchmen ever. It was cause it did. It wasn't the guys in jail. The guy was in jail for something else, though. Like the guy in jail. But they were, they were fucking killing people and just chilling outside. I know, but like they killed again. When you're a henchmen and you don't get your money, you gotta go kill the boss. Yeah, but who do you think is gonna sit around and kill somebody in Las Vegas for you, just like that? It's not gonna be a good day. It's not John Wick. These guys are fucking very, you know, they're making bad choices all the time. Yeah. These guys are making terrible choices. Yeah. And they got away. They did a good job as far as henchmen go. I think they're like, you only got pox. They only get half. And then you need me, but yeah, true. That was fair to it. The deal was both. Yeah. So it was both. Both of. What's up, both of? The holidays are basically one long combo of eating too much, drinking too often, and not moving at all. It's fun, but your system ends up taking a hit. Gosh, those for your liver helps, aid digestion and promote liver function. So you can enjoy the season without crashing halfway through. It's a smart, easy thing to take daily that helps your body process everything you're throwing at it. No guilt, no lectures, just actual support. That's nuts. Does it, Matt, could you hit me with some discussion, Brahms? Let me see, please discuss your experience with overindulging. Matt, what's your body trying to tell you after your third party in a row? I mean, I don't, it depends on what kind of overindulging we're talking. I know, I'm talking food, we're talking sex. I can tell you exactly. My mind's telling me no. But my body. No, I've, I've dose is good. It tastes good. For sure. Yeah, that's it. Load that stuff. So I need to say about that. Load that stuff. So ready, ready to give your liver the sport deserves at the dose daily.co slash MSSB to enter MSSB to get 35% off your first subscription. Your body does so much for you. Let's do something for it. That's d-o-s-e-d-a-i-l-y.co slash MSSB. For 35% off your first month subscription. Whoo, once on my own time. Hahaha. Guys, please come. I'll be at the Springfield Comedy Club in Springfield, Missouri. This weekend, 12, 12, 12, 13. It's gonna be good. I hear you guys have good openness. Oh, yeah. I got the Mies man. The Mies. I got the Mies man. They're gonna see the Mies too. Yep. That's the Mies, the Mies in the flesh. Syracuse, New York. I'll be there 12, 19, 12, 20 at the funny bone. And then go to matmacusker.com. I'm gonna do a bunch of shows, come January 16th, all over the country. Thank you. Yeah. If you're in Philly, buy tickets to the show at the link. And you should do that. There's gonna be some very good special guests. The ticket will be worth it. Even if I suck, because it's an stadium, the show's gonna be worth it. Thank you. Oh, the mayor, sure. Hey, everybody, it's me, the mayor. Why don't you promise to the camera you're gonna stop drinking and driving? I promise. Yeah, dude. All right, go ahead about your fucking bullshit. I do promise. December 17th, in all of New York, please come out over there. And also January 15th at the Hilly and Malfurred. And please, please come. Woo. And optimum knocked us December 16th, actually. They've been really fun recently. They've been a hoot. Hell yeah. That is pretty loud. I always wondered though, why didn't the show ignite then try to kill Diddy? I wonder if that's... You know what I mean? If it was definitely him and he was in the car, he saw the gun, man. So I was curious why Shug Knight didn't try to kill Diddy. He's been to you. Now he didn't. He's in jail right now. Is he... Shug Knight's in jail? I think he's in jail. He ran over that guy. Yeah. Yeah. I watched it. Weird like one of the Sean Blazington type videos of them interviewing Shug Knight. And he was corroborating everything that 50 was saying. Really? He's really skinny now though. I mean, I don't know. Maybe I shouldn't talk about this. Wow, what the hell? We think you're gonna get touched. And the culture is speculating that he has like in autoimmune deficiency type deal. He might, what the hell? What the fuck? I don't like this fucking crazy conspiracy. He probably does. Oh, you're saying like autoimmune. Shug has AIDS. Yeah. That's what the culture was saying in the YouTube video that I watched. I don't like that. I don't like it. I don't know why I even brought it up to be talking about that. But him having AIDS potentially. Yeah, I don't even really want to talk about it. Oh, you thought he might have been. You're afraid Shug's gonna get you. Sean Gardini. Sean Gardini. You have to be scared as Shug's gonna get you. Yeah, I'm not fucking saying it. I'm saying Sean Gardini is saying that on a pretty massive platform. Yeah, that people, you're gonna have to say it. No, no, no. I'm not gonna say it with the streets. You're here to the streets. Yeah, the streets are talking. Now I'm not, you know, just telling you how so is epic. Yeah, it could be. Could we just get diet and exercise? True. Allegedly. This is all legit. These are all legit rumors. We need that documentary. Well, Mayor, you got to spearhead that doc. How did easy is get AIDS? Straight out of compliment. Yeah, spearhead documentary. He's puking. I think you're mayor has AIDS. No, yeah. The people even get AIDS anymore. People still get it, I guess. Yeah, it's, but it's totally manageable from what I heard. Yeah, like I've had it now for like 10 years. Yeah, I catch it every, right around when the seasons change. I got it once I got my third booster. I got HIV. It wasn't a big deal. It wasn't a huge deal at all. Just kidding. Anyway, oh, there's a lot of college football drama. No, enough of Matt's hip hop corner. True. Yeah, some of Shane's sports corner. We've covered the culture now. Sounded creative sports. No name got putt fucked. Not a big deal. No name got didd in front of everybody. And that's fine. We got did learned about as hard as it gets. Who done it? It's a committee. It was a committee. They, they, they lied on us for weeks. They lied on us. They put us, they ranked us ahead of Miami and Alabama for weeks and weeks. And then both teams not playing. They go, man, they're better. Wait a second. Oh, that was ever. Now look, I'll give them Bama or excuse me. I'll give them Miami. Because Miami, they both went 10 and 2 and Miami beat them. Granite, it was week zero. It was in August. And Notre Dame starting a freshman quarterback for the first time on the road and they lost by field goal with one minute left. OK. Still, they played the game and they lost. Yeah. Give us the 1993 title. Now, we get the 93 title if that's how we're doing it. But then Miami proceeds to lose to SMU and Louisville. Who are fair to Midland. Quality, but fair to Midland. Those are not great losses. Notre Dame rattles off 10 straight wins by an average of 30 points a game. Killed everybody the rest of the year. But push comes to shove. They give it to the head to head winner, which I can, I know I was all for Miami getting in over Notre Dame in that scenario. But Bama is nine and two or 10 and two going into the conference championship game. Now, the logic is you shouldn't be punished for playing a conference championship game. It's an extra game against Georgia, who's one of the best teams. Yeah. But you get killed in the conference championship game. You get killed. You lose 28 to seven with negative three rushing yards total. You get bullied. Yeah. Don't move. Don't drop it. Oh, single rank. You stay above Notre Dame. Come on now. Fucking bullshit. That's crazy. That is crazy. But it's just the... That's drama and people are people kind of like gloating, sending you nasty stuff. Obviously, I'm still receiving nasty messages. Not stop. Fuck Notre Dame. Fuck you. Fucking bullshit. And that's fine. What is the effect, though? It's just the standings or... Well, that knock Notre Dame out of playoffs. What? Miami and Alabama. Miami and Alabama got in. Notre Dame's out. That's fucking bullshit, bro. I heard, bro. I woke up that morning going... Notre Dame might win a national championship. Oh. Dude, it's a live show that they unveiled the rankings and who's in. And everybody's like, oh shit. Like, because all the ESPN announcers, the whole time, they're like, Notre Dame should be out. They've advocated against Notre Dame. So I'm like, get a little worried. I'm like, fuck, they're gonna fuck us. They're not checking the Vegas odds. And Notre Dame's a lock. Like, all right, so Vegas thinks Notre Dame's in. I'm confident. Yeah. Notre Dame gets fucked. What? So I go from thinking, we got a chance this year. We got a lot of talent. We can compete for a title. Then later that day, they declined to even play in a bowl game and the season's just over. What? Yeah, Notre Dame's done. Why did they play the bowl game? It's a good question, Matt, but I like it. I like their decision. They're like, fuck you guys, yeah. Yeah, they're like, fuck you guys then. Cause they would have made ESPN and the ACC money in both of them campaigned against Notre Dame. Yeah, let them feel the pain. Also, half our team was gonna sit out. Cause it's a meaningless, they were like, all right. You can't win an national title, but you can play in the fucking Pop Dark bowl in Orlando. Fuck you. How are they looking next year? I mean, I'm already thinking next year. They're fucking, they're gonna be nasty, brother. I'll say, yeah. They're gonna be fine. They got a chip on the show. They're gonna town next season. Miami. Oh, we're gonna fuck them up, dude. I can't wait. Yeah, that's gonna be a fun one. Yeah, dude, I kind of like them getting snubbed and having a little chip on the show. I do too, but the thing that hurts us will never get to see Jeremiah Love run the rock for the Irish again. That sucks. Devastating. Thought I'd get a few more games out. Who do they got? Who do they got? Is there a young team, aren't they? They are, but we lose. Well, we'll be all right. Transfer's in the recruiting classes the last couple years have been pretty nasty. This year's sucks. I just see these young boys play football. True. You know, I'm sorry to happen. That sucks. Yeah, it was a devastating day. That's fucking, then the Eagles lost in embarrassing fashion again. Forget that. Bears lost for the packer, still. Yeah. I was rooting the Bears on, and I'm understanding, I understand rooting for the Bears. I'm on number two team. You got to support the Bears. I was the first to pack, especially like those consistent basement dwellers finally being good. Yeah, true. That's fun. There's the Alliance come out of the basement. You go, look at you boys. I'd be like, if the Browns were good, you'd go, fuck yeah. But more importantly, Michigan's head coach. Yes. Just got fired yesterday for what? Originally, it was for cause. So on the contract, you can get fired and not get, like, if you have a cause to get fired. OK. So the initial statement is for cause. That's general. Then you go, what did he do? He was banging a couple of the female, like recruiting assistants. Bro. And there's some nasty footage out there. Really? And like, stand in the next story before a game. Like, apparently a text that came out that was just like, yo, come give me a head. Now that one, I don't know how valid that is. But then he got detained by the cops. What? Allegedly. For what? I don't know. I think he went to somebody's house. And I think he threatened. I think he threatened to exit this word, the earth, you know? Whoa. Publicly. I think he said, you want to fucking ruin my life? Respectable power. You want to ruin my life? Yeah, respectable power. Move, obviously. Now those are alleged allegations. That is a, I mean, it's respectable if you're wowing out that hard. And then it's like everything. I'm guessing a wife and kids. So that's where it's like. I'd imagine that. That's kind of the last move to be like, kill my fucking self, dude. God forbid, I had a little bit of fun. Now you had ruined whole life. I am going to kill myself. It's your fault. The thing we got to find out, because this is classic dirty mission. Classic dirty mission. Yeah. Did they know that this happened? Because somebody tweeted about it like two weeks ago. Well, Sandusky, Joe Pai. Somebody said, I know what I'm sure I'm getting fired. And this is why. And everybody ignored it. Now the reason they would ignore it is so they could sign the recruiting class that they already had committed. And then go, actually, that guy's just come back. He's out. I play for Michigan. They tried to they tricked high school kids on top of their coach being a dirt bag. And that, you know, dirt bag strong, but yes, getting a little hair. Come on. I mean, older than that kind of stuff, dude. I can't get more. I saw boils down to the team though. If you're in such a leadership position, you can't be out here, wow, and out like that. Limerick, can you do some research? Is there quarterback transferring? Yeah, I'll do it. Underwood. I feel like it's a, if I were to coach a college program, I'd be that guy. I'm not going to come this entire season, unless we won the championship. Yeah. And which is what they had their last coach, their national champion coach, Jim Harball. Yeah. He's a beast full-blown artist. Really? He would never come like that. No, you can't. He'd literally be like, what? What? Why are you talking about? Yeah, I feel like for the drinking milk, dude. That's the best. He drinks milk. He takes a shirt off to play seven on seven with high school kids. He wore a hat. He's shirtless and played seven on seven. He's the fucking. Well, he's the man. Yeah, I feel like as a coach, you can't try to be out here getting pussy and be cool, dude. You got to be totally focused on the game. I agree. I mean, players obviously should be too. But when I hear about coaches trying to get pussy and my dude knocking off, man. Which do you find out about Lane Kiffin? What's up with him? Who? He's bad, man. Boy, he's a reed. He's bad, man. He's not afraid to talk to college girls while being the head coach at Ole Miss. Can't do it, man. Which Kenny Blame. Broke. Can you imagine? This is rewarding, girls from Ole Miss. Are they trying to take down the coach like that? Yeah, well, the only reason they're taking down Lane Kiffin now is because he left to take the LSU job from Ole Miss, which his team has won loss and they're going to the playoffs, and he's still quit. The whole sport's just... Yeah, what the hell's going on? Money. Money changes the sport entirely. Damn, these guys are superstars now. They're all stars. Players, coaches, they're all strictly business. Brian Kelly taught us that at Notre Dame, dude. We've never burned before. True. But we got deadied. We fucking... We hired him after he made... He took Cincinnati from like Cincinnati. Took him to a sugar bowl, like undefeated, and then he quit before the ball to take the Notre Dame job. Abandoned his team before the biggest game. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's kind of crazy, man. It was kind of the right move because they were playing Florida and they were definitely going to get butt fucked. I went undefeated. You guys fucking lost. And I got 30 mil. So... Yeah, I mean, couldn't they just let him play that one last game? Sometimes they do that, but yeah. Or they're like, we need your hairy up. Yeah. Get over here. And when Kiffin left, he took a lot of the staff, too. They're all miss lost, like the coaching staff. Damn. I didn't know so much drama going down. A lot of drama. I still think with all the apps now that you have to like... If you want to watch a sport, it's like... Does YouTube TV cover like every sport thing? Or is there still teams where it's like you got to pay a monthly thing? It depends. If you know it, I mean, your national brand and everyone loves you. You can be on TV. Yeah, for sure. Now, they cover the big games here. I feel like the gambling apps, the least they can do is pull together some money and just stream every game for free. Of course. That's what they should do. That would be the right thing. I guess all that out of bar, which is the smartest thing I've seen was one of those like Fandall or Draft Kings or one of those had a TV network. And it was showing like Serbian basketball at like 3am. It's the least they can do. That's what you... First off, you're going to make so much money. Yeah, true. I think that's the least I can do. Especially after like, you know, the guy who was on the app for six months lost everything, punches, wipes and jail. He should at least be able to watch sports. In jail. He should be like... I wish I could be gambling on this fucking bitch wife set I'm not allowed. But at least they're streaming every game for free. Which... Because that's what I've been hearing. It's like a pain in the ass. Like where's the game on? Like, oh, you need this thing. You got to go to this app and there. It's like... Like certain sports. Like I got to go to the gym. I got to go to the gym. I got to go to the gym. I got to go to the gym. I got to go to the gym. It's like baseball, especially here in Texas, where it's like you can't get local. Yeah. Like I had to buy the baseball thing to watch the Phillies. Yeah. Nate had to buy the league pass to watch the 76ers who are still fun. Yeah. That Lakers game. The Lakers game. Look. I hate to lose, but watching LeBron have fun. Watching LeBron have fun. Watching LeBron have fun. Yeah. The only thing I did, like, is the crowd was so hyped for it. For LeBron. For LeBron. I had it at the same time. Like you get to watch LeBron who won last time. When he was drunk. That's right. We got it. He's been playing, how long has he been in league? It has to be like 21 years, 22 years. What? Yeah. I was in like good kids. Yeah, we're kids. Jesus Christ. That's crazy. He's played against like players and their dads. Like he's been in the league so long he's played against dads that now have some 30 years. He's dunked on fucking them. Different generations. Yeah. He's kind of a man. He is. He's standing there. He killed the stout of my. He just the hard way is to stand. Everyone's getting fucking whole family lines getting wiped. The curries are next. Yeah. I'm rooting for LeBron son. Everyone was hating on him. Yeah. Kind of rooting for him. Oh, you know I'm rooting for his shit. Or are you really having as he turned it around? I started to cheer for him when he dropped in the draft. Yeah. Be fun to see him do well. And unfortunately got sent to the fucking Browns where you never going to every quarterback that's ever been sent there just dies. True. But he played all right. He's doing all right. He's starting now the rest of the season. It's kind of sick. Yeah. I would be those well. Also Dion kind of shut the fuck up a little this year. He killed out. I think his team sucked. What Colorado do? Well, Mayor. What was Colorado football's record? I did. I did. I was underwood transfer from Michigan. They're saying it looks like it. Because if you're kind of a bit of a student, they were... Yeah, you don't really hear much about the Buffalo. It was a big news last year. They were. And then the Buffalo's never really did a single thing. So they kind of had to move on. Yeah, that was kind of exciting. They were just joking racial division. It's all I think. It was crazy. Just for the check for 2024, dude. They were three and nine this year. They were three and nine. Yeah. I had a feeling because Dion was awfully quiet. So they didn't change the... It's time to take the humble approach. Didn't change the game after all. That was like posing it. Like it was like a sports revolution. That was going to change together. Yeah, they had a black coach. It's the first time in the history of football. I guess crazy, dude. Other than Notre Dame. But whatever. Maybe he's not a dick. But yeah, that's another one. Like I would shit on them. And then you look into how fucking nasty Dion was. And it's like, I understand why he's insane. Yeah, he deserves to be insane. He was like the greatest dude. Every time we played back here at football, it would just be 12 kids pretending to be Neon Dion. Every time. Yeah, the whole time. Yeah, the whole time. Little shuffle when he scored the whole time. Yeah, that's good sports talk, though. It's a lot going on. I've made me with like the girl version of sports talk. You know what I mean? I'm giving you the drama. You give me the dirty deeds. We're not talking ball. We're talking narrative. All field issues. Talking to narrative. We're talking. You know, I love the narrative. You guys see your boy, Kiffin. What's he up to? Just the text. The girls are. I can't obviously do if you talk to college girls. They're going to fucking post it. I know. And they take, they would like one girl would hold her Snapchat. And the other girl would take a picture of it. And be Kiffin be like, don't tell your boyfriend about this. Come over to my house. It's like, did you, you're cocking a fucking heist? I'm a fucking college kid. I know. I know. Some poor kid. There's a fan of yours. It's a fan of the school. He's going to the games. Just slide. I got it. Come on, Ole Miss. Slides the visor backwards. Time for a blowjob. Yeah, I just don't like the idea of coaches getting a bunch of pussy from Kyle. It's just bothers me. Bathers me deeply. You should. You're a heartball man. True. You would love Jim. I really like the sound. And as I talk shit on Michigan, heart balls, man. Yeah, I just. They cheated, but awesome. True. I wish I was no day when she'd argue with the fuck. Cheat with please. True. Thank you for forgetting this later. This episode is brought to you by Aura Frames. Oh yeah. Last minute shopping. For gifts is the worst. The shelves have been picked clean. And really, if you've been putting it off this long, there's a good chance you have no idea what they even want. You know. Every year. Oh yeah, I should have what you do before you do anything. I just need you to riff for me, daddy. Riff on something about Aura Frames for me, daddy. No, I like to. I like to give him to my mom. I've told you this before. I like to give him to my mom, me, my brother's sisters, pictures of us as babies in the bathtub. Then I have some ones from us and we were like a little older in the bathtub. And we're actually recreating the whole family in the bathtub. I'm gonna need to get a copy of that. Yeah, we're. I need a copy of that. Cousins and all. We're all gonna get in there and just do like different shots. Kind of like a counter situation. So. It just asks our children all of us in the bathtub. James is doing that with his daddy. James is dad getting an explicit splash. They won't tell you about it. Save yourself the stress and get them a personal gift that doesn't scream last minute. A Aura digital picture frame. Can you imagine? Matt, I need you to riff again. The riff for me, daddy. This is another riff about the Aura frame. Oh, man, the one thing I really like about it, man, we have a cup. We had them all through our house. There are frames everywhere. And I have a picture of myself for my eyes. It's like a portrait of my eyes actually move. Oh, wow. Some people come by and go, and then I go, got you. Yeah. Everybody comes in and go. Yeah. So that's something that's a fun thing you can do. That's a fun thing you can do. 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Yeah, you sub it out. I'm going to fucking Home Depot right now. Boys, I'll give you 10 bucks. I'll build that fucking porch. I know, that's what I'm saying. But nobody subs out white collette. You never hear about an employee subbing out there. Yeah, yeah. They got that fucking broke. They got the broke mine buyers. They do. It's the broke mine. The only no is sitting there, sweatpants in the house, but I don't feel like going on this Zoom. Oh, bro, that's not the broke mine buyers. That's what I'm doing right now. Sitting at sweatpants going, I don't feel like going on TV or the Zoom. Yeah, but just wail out. Just fucking blank screen. Guy from fucking Nepal. Just be like, just somebody. Sorry, guys, I have a cold. Excuse my accent. I'm like, yes, buddy, they're good. You're talking to 40, dude, guys. That's a nice fucking squad. Just like chorus. Like, yes, okay. That'd be awesome. That guy's actually working for remote. I'm in fucking Kabul right now. Forgive my internet connection. Yeah, time. That's a great idea, man. I'm telling you, I wish people to do that. I would do that right now. If I had to get a job again, I would just get nine jobs. I'd apply for nine jobs to get as many as I can. Completely lie on your resume as hard as you can. You have a company, dude, at that point. Yeah. You'd be the boss. You'd be the bully boss. You'd be the bully boss. You'd be the bully boss. You'd be the secret boss. Also, it's so easy to get those jobs. Just be like, find like a local, especially if you're in like a shitty town. Just where people are kind of, you know, you just go to like a card dealership. I'll be the social media manager. Dude. Any data entry job. Just go to any shitty company and go, I'll be your social media manager. You've got to hire an Indian to post shit on Facebook once a week. PCK. Five grand a month. True. Here we go. True. That's all you got to do. That's my, that's the business corner. We did the sports corner now. We're in business now. Back to business. No. Was this a money channel? Yeah. But now, man, Ben, dude, I did a last two nights ago. I got to go to my kids like Christmas concert. Yeah. Dude, it was so awesome. It's also funny because it's like, yeah, big time. I was like laughing. See the little angels. Yeah, too, especially, yeah, my, the youngest went up to and she was like facing the wrong way. I don't know how, just facing sideways. She's sitting there. Turn around. I was doing it. I was dying because all the kids are there. They take it all very seriously. Yeah. And then I just watched my daughter just like turn around and she would start like poking people next to her and then like a part of the song she knew it and she would turn around and put her hands here and be like, ah, that was good. But it was funny because the kids get older. You know, like kindergarten. It's so boys and girls going pretty hard. Once you hit like second, third grade, you can see the boys start being like, I don't want to do this shit anymore. And the girls carry the performance so hard. And the boys are like, they'd clap and move a little bit and like you see the girls just like belting it out and the dudes are just existing being like, come on, man, let me the fuck out. It's so funny watching that as the years progress to where dudes just immediately are like, I'm not doing this shit. The girls really take that shit so seriously. They never stop taking that kind of shit seriously. If you were to get like eight women right now, like, you guys got to make up a dance and put on a song and they'd take, okay. It would be so serious. It's going to look like shit. It was really funny to take me. It was taking me back to grade school when you just sit up there and you're like, oh, damn it. I feel so weird. My brother's out there laughing at me right now. I got fucked every year on that every year. I'd be like, I'm going to get a good role in this. They put me in the back. The fucking tableau. What was it called? Like, what do you do in the tibetit scene? Yeah, yeah. Is it the tableau? I don't know if it's called the tableau. It's called something. It could be. It's going to be tough to Google it. I always wanted to be a shepherd or a wise man. I got shepherd one and I got a hold of banner and go like this. Just shake a banner. What were you aiming for, like, Joseph? I could have got Joseph. You were on Joseph. I could have got baby Jay. Baby Jay would have been a good one. I could have laid down. I could have laid down. Why? Why? Just rise up and go on to just skip four to start attacking the youths. They're here. You will not turn my father's temple. But yeah, man, that was the concert with sick. It was a funny watching. You told me you were doing that and I was like, that's going to be nice. Oh, so nice dude. Yeah, I did my, it takes it so seriously. We have a video footage. Tableau? Fuck it. I knew it was a dead scene. It's in there. That was a big moment. We had a play. We had a play for all the kids that could be nice and act and be good. And then all the shitty kids were in the tableau where all you have to do is stand there for like five seconds and pretend to be an activity. But then do you get the whole of Kane as a shepherd? I got to hold a cane one year and then the next year I literally just stood behind everyone and shook a banner back and forth. My parents had to be like, this kid's a fucking bomb already. He's fucking loser. There's fucking 20 kids in his class. You got the last. You got the last job. I've told this before. We had to do a play and I immediately it was like, I was so older brother pill that I was like, that dude being in any plays gay, I'm stage crew. Well, that's what happened. That's what happened. That guy in there and you're like supposed to audition. I was like, I'm not going to fucking do this. I'm going to make fun of this. Then you get the bad one. Not the bad one. I'm holding the banner going, fuck. That guy looks cool as shit. He got to play Joseph. And the girl I liked played Mary. That was always like fucking hot as fuck is Mary. Why is it always, how do they know the hottest chick is Mary? They know the hottest. And yeah. What were the mates? You guys do a May procession? What's that? I was just saying around, it's actually kind of pagan now that I think about it. But in our Catholic school, we would do this thing where it was like around May, the hottest chick would be Mary basically. The May queen. It was like the May queen. Wow. So we would all like, it's pagan, dude. It is kind of pagan, bro. Holy pagan. It is very pagan, but we'd have the May queen. You know, a little sprinkling for the May queen. And we were like, follow, it was like a procession. They would just take like the hottest chick with the biggest boobs in your class. They'd be like, yeah, she's Mary. She's got the biggest tips. She's very, she's very tips. Look, she could bear a child. And yeah, we'd all just like follow her. And that was the one I'd be like, God, she looks so beautiful, dude. That would, that would fuck me up. Yeah. During the play, I remember stage crew. As soon as any of the actors would be get called, they could, it was like, they're cute to go out. I would hold on to the back of their costume. Come on, let me go, let me get, we do that in stand-up. Yeah. They'd grab people and go, you're going out. How the fuck are we going to do that for you? Yeah, it was so fun. But yeah, my cousin landed the hero role. He landed like the main role. And we were all just backstage. And he kind of killed it. And we were all just like, the fucking pussy bitch. That's so, like, you see him on stage next to the baby. And you'd be like, fuck you. Which I was there next to the baby, but still in the back. Fuck. Yeah, it was awesome. Chris and play rule. Then you sing joy to the world at the end. Same at the end of Christmas Mass. Yeah. That's the only time I would belt and change. You could get me belt hit the hardest. JTW. Yes. You guys don't know shit about JTW. What's your word? Yeah. You got kicked out for being a sex pervert. I made it through seven grades of it. That went through. I did the singing. Well, we didn't have to do a play though. We had to do this. You were the donkey in the play. I was always whatever it was. Yeah, just like a donkey. No. You said get the sex pervert and the donkey suits. Yeah, what were you, Nate? Were you like a wise man from the east? Well, we didn't do the play. We lead from Zambibia. There's a wise man from Zambibia coming up. He's here in Red and Pennsylvania. We did the songs from Sister Act. I had to do the rap part. Which one? Huh? Joyful Joyful Lord or it was called. Yeah. I still remember the first one. I was hoping it was going to be a happy day. That was a good one. I think we might have to do that too, but I didn't do. Those are the two songs. We always did two from a movie. I can't remember. I just remember doing Joyful Joyful Lord. And then we did the year before that. We did Oliver. And it was just like food, glorious food. I don't know why, but that's what we do. That's nice. That's awesome. Limerida, do you ever participated in any holiday plays? No. Why not? I don't think my school could afford it. Could afford a fucking play. It's free. In Detroit? It's free. Yeah, but like they didn't like they didn't make us do it. Right. No, it's not. I think running in Detroit, I think, I think, I think, I might have a case here. It's just, it's smaller, but it's, you know, it's just, it's just, it's pretty fucking poor. Although Detroit might be holding it down as number one poorest. Yeah, they might have the broke mind. Yeah, why are you competing? Why are you competing for poverty? It's not good. I was a gardener here with that. Give credit where it's due. Yeah. The gardener. I have a surprise behind me if you want to. What is it? Okay, hold on. It's a birthday cake for Shane. Yeah. Shane's birthday today. It's your special day. You got on that little bitty cake. I thought it was going to be bigger. I thought it was supposed to come with candles, too. Yeah, do it. It's a big cake. You got me a couple. I just slapped it and it fucked me. Shut it to the camera. Yeah. I'm going to slap it. I'm going to slap it. I'm going to slap it. I'm going to slap it. I'm going to slap it. I'm going to slap it. I'm going to slap it. I don't need sexist probably when you get shady cake. I'm like, yeah, get him a cake. Pearl is just slapping the fucking face Smack it out his hand You bring this to me on my day The cake's perfectly intact that was Matthew's idea slap it. I would never do something Yo, did you want to order a cake? Thank you. Did you walk four miles and get it? Did you walk and get it? No, no, I think this looks very good. It delivered. Thank you. It needs to be defrosted before serving I'm gonna let it sit at room temperature for 30 to 45 minutes I mean no candles No candle the candle You did buy me some zins this morning. That's judge jail and I tried to get candles at the CVS. They didn't have them That's okay. I appreciate the effort. Yeah, the cake is nice It's not very nice It's said it's served four to five people. Yeah, what the no one won. There's false advertising Dude, that's fucked up Get you a nice cake. I don't want to kick I knew you wouldn't want it Yeah Where'd you get that from Amy's ice cream they fucked me so They said four to five people and I ordered the candles for five extra dollars So Amy's you on my shit list No, Amy's is great. Don't Amy's ice cream is good ice cream But I know they're fucking birthday cakes. I like ice cream cakes. That's why I hate ice cream. Yo, that's crazy I've always hated ice cream cake ever since I was younger. It's like just I was so pumped when someone got an ice cream cake I hated that shit. I don't like cake. I like ice cream cakes. Yeah, like cake and I like ice cream I don't like fun fatty though fun fatty cake I'm fucking slamming no on there. Yeah, fun fatty slamming you guys could have got fun fatty cake Guys, I'm 38 years old. I need a fun fatty cake What color of frosting fun fatty frosting I Like the way this is wrinkled taste Dude, he really it's like I can taste them man. Yeah, you have him. You like these do give you a taste Because it is just vanilla delicious treat, but fun fatty is so fucking good Bump any ice cream. Lamar, would you get me from my birthday? It's a big fat pew can You jacked off in my house He said happy birthday brother Every bodily fluid in your house for your birthday. He did I did eat some chicken off radio. He made this week Where'd you get those noodles? Equality everything you made I can't believe how good it was Like you think he made chicken off radio and it's fucking delicious. Yeah, Lamar's a chef. Yeah He said he debris everything debris learns he has a twin everything is when he learns he learns too Pre-want the culinary school and Lamar got the download He did honestly learn everything You're pretty knows Everything Yeah, we were talking about 38's of useless age. Yeah, it's pretty dumb Yeah, nobody gives a shit 38 39. I also I thought I was 38 this whole year. Did you? There's one though. Yeah, I've been already for yeah. Yeah. I don't know. No, I've been 40 my whole this whole year Anyone asked me when I'm 40 pretty goes you're actually 39. I go shut the hell up. I'm fucking 40 Yeah 39's embarrassing 39 is like don't even talk to me about my age. I'm fucking 50 right now. I'm 75 I'm dead. Yeah, I'm my Spotify. I identify as my Spotify age 73 I think 73 I'm an old soul But yeah, dude, I was I was telling you before I came here just I I think from Saturday morning. I had like a two-day hangover from for sure staying out all night Went to like a kids b-day like 11 a.m. And I was like I could have just slept But I woke up and I'm like I slept into like 10 30 and I was like I'm up That's just crazy. I never sleep in this late go to this fucking birthday like an injured warrior course I'm just like my head is killing me my my eyes are my skin felt weird. Yeah, dude. We were up so late It was just it was horrible kids b-days. Oh, same dude It was it was absolutely brutal and then I go to take a nap before taking a nap And he goes oh, we have a bar crawl today and I was like you gotta be fucking kidding me So we got to take a nap wake up still hung over And at like 6 30 p.m. We all went out first to like get food and drinks and I just like drank a martini or which I'm gonna call it espresso martini Just to fight the hangover off and then just sat there just at every bar like oh You only had one I had and then I sipped like I know strengths the problem was every year I last year I had do you ever have a buttered rum? I'm not sure dude Buttered rum is maybe the perfect holiday drink. It's just rum warmed up with like a quarter stick of butter and maple syrup and cinnamon Oh, I remember it last year and it was just such a treat I looked forward to it all year going can we go back I can't wait to go back to the miracle on fifth street I'm getting a buttered rum Show up the go. We only have coconut hot chocolate. I go motherfucker bro I'm so hungover and I was I was banking on this. I was gonna be an espresso martini in a buttered rum and then feel better tomorrow And they didn't have it and I might have to make my own buttered rum you should I am I'm gonna make one good delicious I'm gonna you know Trigger warning to anyone who believes in Santa Claus. I'm gonna put all the Christmas gifts together And I'm gonna have a buttered rum and then another one at Christmas dinner. Yeah, I can't that's something to look forward to Oh, I can't wait. I look forward to it all fucking year. Yeah, that's a hot day treat in my darkest hour going I don't see the buttered rum on the menu, but I just sure like one they were not making it Oh my god I can tell you if I was if I had gone on a bar crawl that day. Yeah, I would have Blacked out. Yeah, I would have gone as hard as I could I to escape the pain of that hangover see I laid in the tomb And just took it on the fucking chin fucking wish man. I was I was dying watch watch college football day just laid there true Then watch noted and get absolutely butt fucked the next day. Oh you had it that I was watching the album a game going They're out. We're in they have to be out there negative rushing yards How No, they've had more rushing yards. Yeah, then Alabama in the conference championships It couldn't you do like a negative? It's like a math equation where you go like stat for stat almost you can and no names ahead But I guess they're just trying to schedule. Yeah, no, they've had a week as schedule. Yeah What do you undo? There's nothing we can do teams backing out all they they they join two conferences now So they're kind of like two super conferences. Mm-hmm. It's just the big town in the SEC So they're kind of They're starting to like they kind of fucking hate the no-dames independent All right, is there like a Vince McMahon behind this all like putting these all together now I mean there's commissioners of conferences for sure, but there's just a ton of money in the SEC in the big time So these schools like Texas and Oklahoma they were big 12 it was it used to be a geographical fun time It makes sense. Yeah, no, it's not now UCLA is playing fucking Rutgers. What are we talking about? Yeah, what's that? Women's volleyball they got to get on a fucking charter On a fucking Wednesday night you're playing the in New Jersey. Yeah, that's kind of nuts actually you're just a beautiful girl from UCLA God, which I was a beautiful girl from UCLA Send him a 38 year old fucking slob You're a beautiful girl from UCLA. What have you gotten on a birthday? Oh my god. I'm in bracelet dude Two have gotten the whole world that I get a broken cake from a fucking shitty. Wop I'm a disgusting. Wop smoking cigarettes the cake smells like cigarettes. It was from all of us by the way You guys all chipped in show quarter back. It's all quarter back. This is for you guys you pay 50 cents As chipped in 75 cents How much was that cake it was Good morning five bucks plus five for the candles. Yeah, you got him a five dollar cake no 25 Yeah, it's kind of I am with you. I you think you get a you know, yeah, it's four or five at least an eight inch or I was hoping for eight inches I was looking for eight inches Never came game chain the micro bird. Yeah, so you did give me the micro bird No, I imagine if I was a UCLA volleyball girl. I mean bro what my birthday would be like today Been crazy instead. It's just I'm gonna lay here Champagne play hell that loose champagne everywhere. We'll get the economy on the horn true Mean is cousin we're gonna play hell that loose and we get killed every five seconds jog Gage darn it well Well, we did it. Yeah, happy birthday. Thanks man. Happy birthday. Another one in the books. We did it Yeah All right Join the join the patreon to I mean we're gonna go crazy. Oh, I have I have been actually I'm gonna talk about bail off I started reading bail thing again perfect. It's the best book ever Thank you Watch new episodes of mat and Shane secret podcast on Spotify do it