“I Do This Too”

Hi, it's Tony. On today's show, we'll get football picks from Chuck Todd and Reginald the Monkey. We'll also catch up with David Remnick, my longtime friend. He's the editor of The New Yorker about the Netflix documentary celebrating the 100th anniversary of The New Yorker, but first commerce. Previously on The Tony Kornhizer Show. So there was no danger to its life and it was squeaking. And I just assumed at some point it would know off its tip. But I called Michael. I wanted to get it, but I didn't want to get bitten by the mouse. And the mouse was all the way in the back under the sink and was not going to be easy. I just told Michael this. I didn't expect what then happened. Well, I come to the front door. Yes, with tongs. Tongs. They got the grilling tongs. Got tongs. This is General George Washington and you're listening to The Tony Kornhizer Show. All right, so we have a lot of small things to deal with before we get to the guests today. First is to thank Greg Garcia. Greg Garcia sent us each. Michael and Nigel and I sent us caramels. And they're lovely. They're just so good. And they sent a bunch of them. So thank you to Greg. I appreciate that. Can I give a plug for Greg? Sure. Because he's coming back with Nate Barghetti to to Washington at the. Is it the Capital One Arena? Is that what we call it now? Who knows? Whatever that is, the old Verizon Center. The MCI Center. It's a. It's a. It's always it's the place downtown that's always named after some phone company. Right. For a bank. It's it's right like April 2nd and April 3rd. So circle those dates and make sure they. I'm going to go. Yeah, you're going to go. Well, I'm going to go with the beginning. I'm not going to see Greg open. Yeah. And then I'm going to leave. I mean, you know, I got a field trip. Yeah. How late can I stay up? I mean, I don't stay up. The NBA Cup, which is foolishness, was finished last night. Thank God it was on Prime TV. I have Prime TV. I watched some of it. I watched the first half and then I said, this is enough for me. I really actually don't care. The next one, they haven't won anything in 52 years. They want anything that that includes no cup, no shop credit, no glassware. They haven't won anything and they won. So I'm happy for the next. And today on the ESPN website, there's a picture of some action and the caption writes, the Knicks win their first NBA Cup. Like what? Like it's been three. There's three NBA Cups out there. You have to start somewhere. Stop their first NBA Cup. Like, don't make this into the final four. It's not. The winner will be forgotten today's Wednesday by Friday. And it's just it's an attempt to get money from foreign developers who want the names attached to the NBA. The it's an attempt to get money and attempt to get worldwide stature. I mean, what is the NBA chasing? It's different than the NFL because basketball is played everywhere. Football is not played everywhere. The NFL is chasing small markets. I mean, big markets, but small markets, not not global dominance. And the NBA is chasing soccer, which has global dominance. There's global dominance everywhere, but here, everywhere, but here. And what has happened to the last two Cup winners? They've lost in the first round of the playoffs, so it's not great. So anyway, I mean, I don't want to talk about that. I want to thank again. Did I I don't know if I mentioned this. I did talk about Sean Reese coming here and right. And the Rosebeefs. Oh, oh, that's why I mentioned how great the Rosebeef was. You said it was very good. Beetman's Rosebeef, sliced thin, rare. It's a deli and Lindbrook Long Island that has been around at least 80 years, maybe more than that. Rosebeef was their signature dish. It's just fabulous. You had some. I did. Yeah, it was great. It's for lunch. Just great. I'm very grateful for that. Did Chessie get any? It's small little bites, small little bites. I need to talk about the cold. It is not nearly as cold this morning as it was on Sunday morning and Monday morning, Tuesday morning. It's not as cold. But there is a lesson here. I mean, it was 27, I think, when I took the dog out this morning, which is cold, but it's not windy. It's not unpleasant. I bought, have I talked about this? I've talked about the winter coat that I bought an over, not an overcoat, but a sort of casual coat to keep you warm in the winter by Patagonia. OK. Patagonia is Michael. What a hipster brand at the moment. It's been around for 100 years. That's mostly you'd recognize it for a very distinctive logo that you'd see on fleeces, recycled fleeces, often through the 90s, 2000s. OK, so I don't have that. I used to have a store in Georgetown. They did, yes, right by the canal. Yeah, I don't think it's as pricey as Canada Goose. Not as pricey as Canada Goose. I'm sure they have some offerings that are close to it, but it would always be on par with like, you know, North Face fleece. How much is a Canada Goose jacket? Like a thousand dollars a month. They're a lot of money. Well, it's got three. Of course. He has three for the patch. Yeah, it's got three. So I got this thing and it's fine. It's a sort of a gray blue color. It's fine. You know, I've worn it with the dog in the 30s, right in the 30 area temperatures, but it wasn't. How long is it? Comes down mid thigh, mid thigh. OK, it wasn't adequate in the really, really cold weather. I mean, I knew that and I had sweaters on underneath. I knew that it wasn't going to make it. So I went back to old, reliable Lilyhammer jacket. It still works, which I've had for over 30 years. Now it's hideous. I know it's hideous, but it works. It I had it for Norway. Describe the color. The color is a. Right. It's a sickening green, a dark, sickening green. Right. I'd say spicy mustard mixed in. Just yeah, it's I mean, it's a really it's not as old as I am, but it's we've had it. I've used it for over 30 years. I use it 10, 12, 20 days a year. I like that it comes out once for us. It comes out once every five to 10 years where you say you it's cold enough. You need to wear this and then you go in the pocket and you find tissues and tissues and things for the dog when the dog poops and biscuits and red crows and no one and things from actually from Norway and some of the pockets from some of the pockets. Yeah, I mean souvenirs and stuff like that. It still works. It's still it. What do you want from a code in the winter? You want to keep you warm? Yes, it's great. Not in really I wore it today. I didn't need it today, but I needed it yesterday. I needed it the day before and I bought this. It's over 30 years old. I don't know if there's if the the ability to keep you warm fades. It hasn't faded with this jacket. I don't know. I would think as long as I don't know. It depends on the material. Like if there was a down jacket and something happens to the the filling that it might not keep you as warm. I don't know if it's a down jacket. I don't know what it is. I know I bought it at Eddie Bauer over 30 years ago. And the other thing I bought at Eddie Bauer last year, the lined pants, which I am wearing now, these are the two greatest pieces of clothes. They're not attractive. These are the two greatest pieces of clothes I've ever bought. I've ever bought. I own. They're great. You know, so I'm happy for that. The Lila Hema jacket to me is like a great left handed reliever. Yes. You see, like 85 years old. Give me the left. You have to be at the right spot in the order. Right. Still get you two outs. Yeah. Yeah. You don't want to abuse it. You don't want to wear when it's 36 degrees. No, no, no. You can put on Patagonia at 30. You go Patagonia down to 26. Yeah. But when at six. Yeah. At six. That's when you go to bring a man. Yeah. The manager comes out, goes to the bullpen and brings in, brings in that particular jacket, the Lila Hema jacket. It's just fabulous. But with this cold start to December, we have just jumped right into middle of the winter weather. Yeah, it's not supposed to be this cold, but it's not going to be. Right. It's going to be like 50 today. That's right. We lost the last two weeks where we'd be on average at 50. 51 is a high. Did I mention? We're barely going to get that today and tomorrow. I played golf last Saturday. Steve Rose and I went out. We were the first ones out. We played in three hours and five minutes, which nothing beats that. It's wonderful. It was about 40 degrees at its height, 40 degrees, but there was no wind. So it's OK. That's the key. It's OK. Wind at 45 kills you. No wind. This time of year, when you jump out on a golf course, you feel the hills when you go in and out of these little hollows, where all of a sudden the temperature drops. So there's a different level of humidity. Well, this is two things I should say. One is every T box was frozen. Yeah. It's frozen. So I had to know I took Steve Rose taught me to do this. Take out the T marker and in the hole that is used insert a T. It's going to be a little bit lower than you want, a little more wildly than you want, but you're going to get a certain amount of elevation. That was one number two. All the greens were frozen. So if I actually occasionally hit a pretty good approach shot, it went. It's off. It goes to the back and I didn't hold the green on any shot. I had some that I thought, wow, it's pretty good. I was over on everything, which allowed me to practice that the sand wedge, you know, shot where you pop it up in the air. I'm terrible at it. Bang it across the green. Yeah, it went the other way across. Got to play the short half. That's, you know, so I want to get to one other thing. In my life, I. I don't think I'm a hoarder, but some might. Some might think I'm a hoarder. I don't think I am. But I have collections of things. And one of the collections that I started doing when I was. In my teens, 20s, it's a long, long time ago, was collecting matchbooks from places I ate at or visited matchbooks. I have two large earns with, I would say, four hundred matchbooks, maybe more. And I needed to light something last night. So went to the went and picked out, you know, something from arts in Las Vegas, A.R.T. Apostrophe S. I'm sure the finest dining in that building, you know, I don't even know. I don't remember arts. It's just arts, Las Vegas, been a Las Vegas a lot as a kid. Nobody smokes anymore. Very few people. Matchbooks, they're not in restaurants anymore. You walk into the palm. You used to be able to get a little keepsake. It's what do you get now? How do you remember? Like these are I don't remember arts, but I'm sure there are a lot of places in there that I would look at and know the city, if not the restaurant, that you don't have some sense of it. These this is the travel log of my life. These matchbooks and they are not. I just realized last night I haven't realized this before. You don't get these anymore. The restaurants give anything out of a keepsake nature that I think you can get like a cocktail napkin and you could hold on to those. But when you think about the matchbook, part of that would be then you would display it at your house either in your urn or if you were the type of person who do this, you'd put it out on a table just so you could show off a little bit of I've been to this restaurant in New York. I've been here in Chicago. I wish I'd learned to do that. I never did that. I have them all in urns, you know, big glass urns. Yeah. I mean, and then when I go on, you're just going to throw them out, right? You know what? I probably will. But it's also something that I remember from my childhood, because we do remember when Maggie used to get into the matchbooks, you actually had to put saran wrap over the cover of the urns. She would destroy the matchbooks. She would destroy them. She'd open the ones that could be opened and the individual matches fell out. That was her. She did that or she just ripped up the others. Yeah. Very annoying. And we had to put saran wrap on the top of it. Yeah. But these are, again, this is the travel log of my life. Yes. And it's and I never thought about it until last night. That's from a bygone era. No, I mean, that's yeah. But I think this is very similar to, you know, holding on to golf scorecards where you can just sort of, you know, keep a map of your travels. But they're still making golf scorecards. Yes, but not as many people use them. And that is the keepsake, the same way that you might get teased from a certain golf course or the push, you know, the push in ball markers. Yeah. But I was thinking about this just in terms of concert tickets that you would hold on to. Are you still they don't have any stuff? Yeah. Yeah. Because a QR code really isn't something that you can, you know, use for nostalgia printout live nations. And I don't I don't think that I'm alone in this. I really don't. I think there's a millions of people who have these keepsakes take them for granted until they don't exist anymore. And they don't. So for you, you could actually go. It might be a fun activity for you to go through these matchbooks and maybe pick out 10, 20, 50 that represent different pockets of your life. And we could turn those into a shadow box or you could get those commissioned into just a nice piece of art where they get. Really? Yeah. I could take it with a frame bridge. I mean, I've got what have I got? I've well, you know, there's there's two different styles. Again, there's the one that opens and the matches are inside and then there's the box, which is different. So you'd have to compress it, press it down. You'd have to do so. Yeah, I could probably get those. Framed. I could get a collage. You know, there are places there that I don't know if they exist anymore. Well, there's like the original Joe Stone Crab in Miami. Like everybody knows that. I'm sure I've got that. But places in New Orleans, the all the great restaurants you've been there. Hotels, golf courses even. It was I collected matchboxes. Matchbooks. I did. Yeah, because you're not a smoker. No, never been a smoker, right? I was a long time ago, but it's it. But people who aren't smokers back in the day. That's what you did. Just grabs matches was a keepsake. Again, they're in these. I've never seen anybody else do that. I guess other people do it as well. Brought me out to the level that you have. But yes, people hold onto these hundreds and hundreds. All right. OK, we'll take a break. Chuck Todd, when we return on Tony Kornhuis. Idol money lies in your current account, picking crumbs out of its belly button. Wondering, should I eat them? But when you start investing with Monzo, your money is always busy. It turns on regular investments, invests your spare change and tops up your stocks and shares. I say it even helps you make sense of risk and return. Monzo, the bank that gets your money moving. You could get back less than you invest. Monzo current account required UK residents 18 plus T's and C's apply. Whether you're off to the big match. Get in. Enjoying a trip to the coast to catch up with friends. Or exploring some incredible history with your family. With up to a third off most rail travel, a rail card can help you save on train journeys all around Great Britain. Find the one for you at railcard.co.uk. T's and C's apply. You're listening to the Tony Kornhuisers show. Have I got a story for you? Story for you. Now I was only five years old. Excited and awake. On the night before Christmas. My most favorite of all days. When low I heard a noise downstairs. So I crept out to catch a glimpse. And there I found my mother dear. With Santa. Locking lips. He said to me. Go back to sleep. This is just a dream. No, no, no. Said I to keep. Remove your hands from my mother. Please. And he said, look, son, it's me. Oh, I think my dad is Santa Claus. This is Tim Wildsmith, our friend, Nashville, Tennessee. One of the highlights of my holiday season. He writes the past couple of years has been the messages I've received from fellow littles telling me how much they love this song and hearing you, Michael and Nigel laugh along, of course, his boots the old enough to listen to this one yet. Thanks for another great year. The show means the world to me. Happy holidays, everyone from Tim Wildsmith planning. Chuck Todd. Chuck reaches Mount 500 and then slips back. Wins wins last night. Wins Pittsburgh last night, puts them to three and four. Fifty two and fifty three, you know, on the course of the year now. Do you feel terrible about this? Or is it is it give you greater resolve? I thought it was worse than three and four. So I'm just sort of, you know, you just sort of like, oh, my record was three and four. OK. Yeah, three and four. I thought it was two and I was two and five. Unless I got it wrong, you were three and four. I'll take it. I'll take it. Yeah. But I'll tell you that song just reminds me like to imagine we were teaching little kids about mommy kissing Santa Claus. Yeah, just sort of let it go. Just sort of let it go. I'm not mean like, by the way, Santa makes the round. God only knows what kind of the SDG Santa could be traveling around. Like that whole thing is just sort of one of the weirder things we've we celebrate by the innocence of youth. All right. This week's picks with Chuck Todd and Reginald the monkey are brought to you by FanDuel Sportsbook. Make every moment more. So I'm going to give you some games. This line is flipped. It is it is going from plus to minus from minus to plus to minus. It's a Los Angeles Rams who looked so good. Beating Detroit at Los Angeles on Sunday. They have the Thursday night game. They travel for the Thursday night game to Seattle. A very good team. Seattle did not look good beating the Colts, but Seattle has a very good record. Now, for reasons unknown to me, the Rams are a road favorite. Giving one and a half in Seattle Thursday night. Who you got? I'm you know, it seems like whoever is crowned the NFC's best lays an egg the following week. Right. Yep. We had it with the Packers. We had it with the Eagles. Now it's the Rams turn. And and so I mean, this is definitely a buy low spot with Seattle. Give me Seattle at home at home. Seattle at home getting points. Getting points on Thursday. Yeah. Yeah. It seems like a seems like a good bet. Okay. I mean, right. I would assume that's where you'd be, right? I would be because I know how loud it is there. And I also know that it can be cold and the Rams. No, I don't like them in this spot outdoors. I mean, that's sort of the only question mark about them is how many outdoor games are they going to play in the playoffs? Right. That'll be the key to whether they get there. If they lose this game, they're probably out as the number one seed for this week. But you know, there's going to be two more weeks after this. And then it's the Bears, right? The Bears might be the best. Philadelphia is at Washington. Everybody got this wrong last week. The Washington team had a resurgence. What was that? Yeah. This is a Saturday game. Philadelphia on the road is a six and a half point favorite. Philadelphia looked very good, but I hasten to point out they beat the Raiders. The Raiders stink. So who you got in this one? So I want to be on the Eagles side, but don't isn't this the game the commanders win when they're bad? Like a couple of years ago, the Eagles were really good. And yet they won this. They lost this game to the commanders. Do you remember that? I don't think it was almost in this same scenario. OK, I just, you know, this a divisional game, familiarity. I don't know. Give me the points. Give me the commanders and the points. I think I'd go the other way on this one, but I would have gone the other way on Sunday. So I would have been wrong. Green Bay is at Chicago. Wilbarn will be there. So all is right in the city of Big Shoulders. Green Bay is a one and a half point favorite. They beat Chicago in Green Bay. I don't know, like a last second throw. So I mean, it just wasn't much. It was an interception. It was an interception. One month. Caleb was, yeah. I mean, Chicago could have won that game. They could have wanted it. Lambo. Green Bay minus one and a half. Third straight road favorite. Boy, I, I. I don't know why the Packers are still a favorite here without Micah Parsons. That's right. With the injuries on their offensive line. No tight end. Um, right. With their number two tight end. Um, boy, the pack, by the way, these injuries have really started to accumulate for them. So reminder, that's part of the part of the, uh, part of the, uh, road to the Super Bowl is who survives. That's right. Um, more than anything else. I have to take the bears here. I don't, I can't believe they're underdog at home. I got to take the home dog here. Okay. One more home dog. Carolina Tampa Bay at Carolina, Tampa Bay minus three. I have to say, I don't really understand Tampa Bay has done nothing but lose the last six weeks. They lose. What are they? One in five or something like that? They're just, they're not, they're not what they were. They're not who they were. Carolina just lost. That was a bad loss. And I don't think Carolina is any good, but I don't think Tampa, I'm surprised. Tampa Bay is a three point favorite. Yeah. And it's on the road. It's in Carolina. Yes. They're not bad at home. Carolina has been okay at home. And they sort of feel like they do this out every other week. So they, they lose to New Orleans this week, last week. Give me, um, you know, is this going to be a losing record that wins this division? I think not. I think it'll be a nine and eight. I think it'll be a nine and eight. That's what I think. And, uh, they'll host a playoff game against what, either Green Bay or San Francisco or Seattle. And they will lose. Yeah, that, that they'll, that they'll lose. Give me, uh, but give me Carolina in this. Give me the home dog again. That's three, three of the home dogs, right? It's four. It's four. Did I say four? Seattle, Washington, Chicago, Carolina. It's four. Yeah. Okay. Here's a home favorite, Denver. Jacksonville at Denver, a game I didn't think would be much six weeks ago. And now, uh, looks like a much bigger deal. It's a one seed, right? Yeah, it could be. Jacksonville could get the one seed. It could be. Well, Denver, yeah, if they beat Denver, um, I don't know what the weather is like in Denver, but it's Jacksonville is a warm weather team. If it's cold, who knows how that affects them. Jacksonville is one of the two or three biggest surprising teams of the year this year. And Liam Cohn must know what he's doing. Um, Jacksonville plus three at Denver. Yeah, I'm, uh, I'm, I'm betting against the altitude that that's the bigger problem for Jacksonville. We'll be the altitude. So give me a, give me Denver. Gonna take Denver. Okay. New England is that both, you believe in bow, Nick's now you believe in bonex? I know I don't believe it. I mean, I think that's a good team. I think Sean Payton knows what he's doing. I think bonex is fine, but I don't think bonex is as good as Drake may. I don't. Why is Sean Payton succeeding and Pete Carroll is not? I imagine there's better talent and Pete Carroll is in his first year and Sean Payton's in his second year and had a year to look around or maybe two years, maybe it's his third year. So you think Pete Carroll gets another year? If he wants it, if he wants it, he may not want it. I think he will. Yeah, we'll see. Okay. New England is at Baltimore a few weeks ago. I wouldn't have thought this was a meaningful game. It is a meaningful game. If Baltimore wants to make the playoffs, they have to win this game. They have to sweep. They have to sweep New England, Green Bay and Pittsburgh at Pittsburgh. I don't like those chances. New England's coming off a loss first time in, I don't know, two and a half months. They had one, 10 in a row. New England at Baltimore, New England getting three. I feel like during the Brady era, Baltimore was one of those teams that had New England's number, didn't they? Didn't it feel like that they, you know, Baltimore seemed to, when they got to New England knew how to beat a Belichick team. I don't know what to make of the Ravens. I was surprised by how easy they won last week. Shut out. They shut out Joe Burrow. They shut him out. Is that a Joe Burrow problem or was that the Ravens defense suddenly from 2000 returned? Well, that would, I mean, that would be unusual since you hadn't seen it all year. Lamar still doesn't look like he's a hundred percent. I'm, give me the Patriots. Patriots plus three. First row team you picked. San Francisco is at Indianapolis on Monday night. Indianapolis is going to throw that guy out there again. Maybe he'll get carted off this time. It was remarkable, amazing that he played so well, but San Francisco is going to have a week to prepare specifically for him. San Francisco is a six point favorite on the road against a team with a winning record. Can I just say watching Phillip Rivers play, I never felt more seen as a middle-aged man than seeing his gut in that jersey. Yeah. When, you know, I was like, okay, I'm glad to know that you can see his gut in a jersey too. Just the way you would see my gut if I were, whenever I think I'm wearing a jersey with a number on it. Um, I think the sports movie's over. I think this, this, give me, give me San Francisco. That's a good phrase. The sports movie, I feel the same way you do that this way. Yeah. This is it. This is, you know, it was nice. I think it was really excellent of Seattle to play a really poor game to make us interested. Yeah. You know, they should have lost drama. Should have lost. You know, it, it probably means he did sell, he did get Netflix to buy the rights, right? I would think so. I mean, don't we see this, right? We'll call it the, it's not the rookie. We'll call this the veteran, right? Something like that. So that's being written right now. Story like this is being written right now. 44 year old grandfather playing in the league. Okay. I'm going to give you the four college games you can pick or choose. Any one or none or whatever you want. Okay. Alabama, I'll just read them out loud first. Alabama is at Oklahoma and for reasons that I don't understand, Alabama is a one and a half point favorite. Miami is a three and a half point underdog at Texas A&M. Texas A&M was unbeaten until Texas beat them in the final game of the season. Tulane is getting 17 and a half at Ole Miss. Lane Kiffin won't be there. Somebody else will be there. That's 17 and a half. And James Madison, welcome to the college football playoffs. Plus 21 at Oregon. Plus 21. That's a lot. That's a lot. You like any of them? So the two games that I'll let you count against my record. Okay. Is I will take Oklahoma and the points. Yes. And Miami and that hook. Okay. And I will just say, I know I'm going to be a homer in Miami, but Miami is always a really good underdog in big games. They're terrible front runners. They're terrible favorites. But when they're underdog role, that's usually a pretty good sign. So that's my excuse there. Something's amiss. Do you remember last year, the Ohio State, Tennessee first round game, had Ryan Day lost that game, he was going to get fired, right? Probably. Probably. Yeah. If Kaling Ball or loses this game. I think he could get fired too. I think he could suddenly be interested in the Michigan. So when Kaling D'Bor, when you see him standing up at a lectern and saying, you know, I'm here, this is where I'm going to be. I'm here and I'm thinking to myself, well, I don't know. I mean, those fans are who they are. And if you lose this one, I'm not sure they won't send you as soon as they can big M's in the mail. And just say, go, get out of here. I would get my haircut today and he had the, one of the chat show ESPN chat shows on and fine bomb was on. Yeah. And fine bomb made a really important point about that Kaling D'Bor answer. He goes, you know, if you're staying in Alabama, that's a pretty simple sentence to say. And then you just sort of move on. He goes, it seemed to take him about 20 minutes to let you know he was kind of sort of okay and definitely going to be here. And like he was being so weird about it that it made you think, is there something we don't know? Is it possible? Yeah. This is what we would ask ourselves. Is it possible that there have been communications through, you know, that Michigan has talked to Kaling D'Bor or his people. And that, you know, he's saying, just give me a week or so. Let me see what happens here. Let me see what happens with Oklahoma. By the way, it's not lost on me. Have you seen, if you look at his resume, it's Midwest. Total. It's it's Northern. It's Dakotas. He's not a Southerner. No, I have no doubt. No, they'd be happy if he left. And I say, and my guess is he and his family would be happy living in Ann Arbor. Yeah. Then what happens, of course, is Lane Kiffin calls up LSU and the governor and says, yeah, I'm going the other way. I'm going out of town and see you. I'll say this. I don't, I don't want to give all those points, take all those points in James Madison or anything like that. Oregon, that guy, Lanny, Oregon, if they, if they won by 40, it wouldn't shock me. They could put an ugly num. They're more likely to run it up. I don't know what to make Ole Miss. I don't, that would, that's what scares me about that, about betting on that. I don't know what to make Ole Miss. I'd be incredibly surprised if they didn't come. I assume they win, but yeah, yeah, I think it wouldn't surprise me if it was a one-score game for longer than was comfortable. It would surprise me if they didn't win by a lot, but we'll see. All right. Good luck. Thank you. We'll talk to you next week. See you, Mike. Chuck Todd. And if we just gave you Chuck Todd, that's more than enough. But we do so much more than that. We give you a monkey. See the monkey, he's scratch, scratch, scratchin', Watchin' his iPad, smokin' and laughin', Hangin' with Bud Grant, tap, tap, tapin' on his purple attache. Sing along, everybody. Zoo, zoo, zoo. Reginald's got the vice, by two. Sometimes he throws poo, poo, poo. And he's had too much Johnny walkin' loose. He had a bad week. He had it had a good week. He was two and one. Yeah. After being one and two for like eight weeks in a row, now he's oh and three last week. He's 16 and 29. It's bad times for the monkey. It is bad times for the monkey. I went down to the National Zoo to meet with him, and he was involved in a very serious meeting, as we just talked about. It's not been a good year for him. No. Betting he's well into 500, has taken a huge hit financially. I didn't realize how serious this was. He's betting on his own games. Yeah, he's betting on his own games. This is his own money. Yes. That's why people say to him, what are you a monkey? Exactly. So the folks that Reginald was talking to are going to be his new financial backers. Who are they? Well, as part of this deal, it means he's going to have a sponsorship for his appearance with us on the show. So if it's OK, I'd just like to read this for him right now. Absolutely. Reginald is proud to be sponsored by the good folks of Ginco Olive Oil. It's the best olive oil you'll ever try. Reginald isn't the only celebrity to endorse this. Fame singer Johnny Fantin is a huge fan of this product as well. Ginco Olive Oil, from the heart of Sicily to your kitchen table, buy it or else. That's wonderful. So it's wonderful. Hopefully it gives him some stability financially. Now, the first match we gave him was Philadelphia giving six and a half at the Washington football team. Saturday game. Saturday game on Netflix. I know you'll be watching. I can watch. See, that or Emily in Paris for you. He pulled out a photograph of him traveling down the Nile on a barge to see the Land of the Pharaohs joined by Greg Luzinski, Eric Lindross, and Kyle Schwalber. He's going Philly. He's going Philly and laid the six and a half for that one. OK, what else? Next match we gave him was Green Bay giving one and a half at the Bears. I believe that's also a Saturday match, isn't it? Yes, it is. Yes. This was a very old photograph he showed me from a newspaper of him competing in a jitterbug contest alongside Ray Nitschke, Forest Gregg, and Jerry Kramer. Not sure who actually won the competition. That's also a big man to do the jitterbug. Well, apparently they loved it. And when they tossed their partner, they tossed their partner. It's like, whoa, they're out the door. Take Green Bay and lay the one and a half. And the final match we gave him was the Ravens at home giving three to the Patriots. And Reginald just pointed to a banner that hangs. I had not seen this in his flat. A banner that hangs on his wall that says, Crag Cakes and Football, that's what Maryland does. Of course, the famous line from Wedding Crashers didn't know if you knew that Reginald was a producer for that movie. I did not know. He lives that philosophy. So Maryland football, Baltimore, he will take the Ravens. That's great. This week's picks with Chuck Todd and Reginald the Monkey have been brought to you by Fandall Sportsbook. Make every moment more. We will come back with the editor of The New Yorker, Sportswriter, former sportswriter at The Washington Post and a dear friend over a long period of time, David Remnick, to talk about the documentary on the 100th year, right? 100 years of The New Yorker, which Michael saw and I saw. Maybe he'll bring out the guitar. Oh yeah, he's apparently now playing. I mean, he's going to take Keith Richards' place at some point. I'm Tony Kornhizer. Bowser is back. Everyone calm down. The Super Mario Brothers can take care of the kingdom. Let's go. On April 1st. Toad pack our things. The galaxy is waiting. Who is this? This is a special. So some cool dinosaur just shows up and he's now part of the group. Cool. The Super Mario Galaxy Movie. Only in cinemas April 1st. There once was a woman who lived in a shoe. A size two snug butt. What could she do? But that's not where her story ends. Thanks to a little help from her experience friends, she got her score into much better shape and relocated to a box fresh new place with room to grow and a mortgage to suit. Now she lives in a spacious four bedroom cowboy boot. Better your experience credit score to help get mortgage ready. Experience. Better your score. Better your story. You're listening to the Tony Kornhizer show. The Tony Kornhizer show. This is John Ross who writes greetings again. Thanks for playing my mailbag song from time to time makes me happy because my realtor more reasons to text me, which also makes me happy. Back during COVID, I was stuck at home like everyone else unable to work the weddings and events that usually fill my calendar. I have a small recording studio at home. I've always loved Christmas music, so I decided to keep myself busy recording an album and called it the COVID Christmas. If listeners want to hear more of the record or added to their holiday rotation, stream for free on Spotify and available on Apple Music. This is a song by John Ross called Send Us a Savior. Michael, if people like John Ross want to send in their original music to get it played on this high quality podcast, send us your music by emailing it to jingles at TonyKornhizerShow.com. Plays in my longtime friend whose talent I admire much better than I. Now the editor of the New Yorker, David Remnick, who's identified, much to my great delight, identified at one point in that documentary as David Remnick sports writer just makes me so happy. And my son is here who actually reads the New Yorker and will interrupt me at certain times. Part of the New Yorker. Yeah, let me, yeah, not the fiction, of course. Apparently nobody reads the fiction. Let's get to the important thing here, which is you had to agree to do this. You are a smart guy. You know it's fraught with peril. How did they sell you on doing it? I, it was with real peril because you know Tony, we've both for many, many years have been on the other side of the pencil and you know the trick. And the first time this guy, Marshall Curry, who's a very smart documentary filmmaker, who did a fantastic thing on Newark politics called Street Fight, which a documentary I love, he's sitting across from me and he's doing that move where he asks you a question and I answered it. And then I stopped answering because my answer was finished, but he did that move where he just went silent because what ordinary citizens do because we're, you know, we're needy people and we want to please the person across from us is you keep talking. Yes, you do. Yes. And you get when you get in trouble because you're trying to please your interlocutor. And he looked at me and I looked at him and finally I said, Marshall, I do this too. You know, my favorite New Yorker writer of all time was AJ Liebling, who was wrote about boxing and World War II and so on. And the way he began an interview with anybody was the same way psychoanalysts begin a session as they don't say a word and they wait for the other person to fill the silence. So it, but I was wary of it. You're right because they're around so damn much. How? You know, we just let him in the office for a day after day after day. Yeah. How many days, how many weeks, how many months, how long were they in their filming? Well, you can see the changing of the seasons during the thing. They were there on and off for for many months. So that's when you get the good stuff. Yeah. At what, yeah. This is, Bob Woodward always outlasts everyone. Bob just sits there and people eventually just tell him everything that they have. At what point, if ever, if ever did you become oblivious of the cameras? I think you'd be a fool to be oblivious. I mean, you go into a meeting with a, when you're, you're mic'd up and yeah, you'd be a fool. You're not paying it. And you, you know, do you see that Vanity Fair piece about Susie Wiles, the chief of staff? Yes. I just read about that yesterday. Yes. Do you know, do you know that she's Pat Somerle's daughter? Yeah. Is that amazing? Yeah. Yeah. Isn't that great? Yeah. Isn't that great? And that's, by the way, that's part of why Trump appointed her because that's his era, right? He's watching Madden and Pat's overall it. If some of them were still alive, they'd be the secretary of defense and commerce. Yeah, sure. Exactly. And by the way, the country might be better off. Yeah. So you never become oblivious of the camera. Did you, did you see daily rushes if they have such things? No, no, it's his movie. It's his film. Oh, so you didn't have a deal. You didn't have last rights. That'd be like your profile subject, getting to see your notes. Well, you could have asked. You could have said, I'll do this, but I want to have refusal. But then it's a ridiculous project. Then it's my movie, not his. Okay. So then let's get to the questions that everybody wants to know. And by everyone, I mean me. I mean me. Yeah. Did you dress special for it? Did you consult anyone? Well, obviously not. The vanity. What are the vanity issues that you had? Well, I looked at the movie and I thought, God, you are so much older, slumpier than I even imagine you. You're posture. So I never watched PTI. Never. Oh my God, you look like a stegosaurus on, you know, on some sort of barbiturate or something like that. Right, right, right. But there you go. There's no escaping. And in a certain age, who cares? So, but I will bet, I would bet that there was a point where you said, I'm going to be on today. What should I wear? What should I wear? No. I just know. Well, of course you think about it, but you should see my closet, Tony. I work at Condi Ness, but you never know. So it's not, it's not a will bond closet. One time in my life, one time in my life, and I've been working with Anna Wintour for many years, you know, in the same building, we're friendly and I know her pretty well. She wants, I came, I had to come, I forget why I had to wear a suit, but this is an occasion as rare as, you know, Halloween comes once a year and that's when I wear a suit. And she looked me up and down like, you know, a drill sergeant and she, an imperceptible nod of approval. That was the highest compliment I've ever gotten about what I've worn. But I wear jeans and, you know, a sweater to work every day. I, you know, I think also the, the, the pandemic changed everything in the office. It just made it, some of the old, well, first of all, going in five days a week, you know, unless you're at Goldman Sachs, I don't know who does that. And in fact, you ever move from your house? Well, I mean, I go to the studio, I now go to the studio two or three times a week, but I mean, I didn't have a fake studio, like half the people on TV do. I have a studio at home. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's amazing. Yeah. I mean, anybody can do that. It's just a camera. I mean, you decide what you want in the background or the company tells you what they want. The background, in my case, I just change things all the time because I know that people take screenshots of it and want to know, well, who made that thing? They're obsessed with this. They're obsessed with this. Yeah. And I get that, you know, I get that. But I, I mean, there is, look, they're making a movie. It's not a home movie and it's going to be on TV and it's the New Yorker and you're going to be in it. And in fact, you are the only full person in it. You are the only person who is not just being photographed doing their work. I mean, you, you're, as Jeannie said, you're the star of it, right? You're the star of it. Only because you and Jeannie know me. I mean, there, there are people in there, you know, they're glimpsed. You're right. Yeah. You can go from personally, you know, John Lee Anderson is working the, he's showing up in Damascus in Syria. Yeah. Yeah. And Ross Chast is sitting down and I'm thinking to myself, this woman is brilliant, but I don't think we could have a conversation. You could, but it would not be like any other conversation you've ever had. Yeah. So, okay. So the personal things, the guitar, which I didn't know, the bicycle, the pelota. Was there any reluctance? Did anybody in the house say to you, oh, no, no, no, don't do this, or, oh, yes, yes, yes. You know my wife. Yes. You know my wife asked her and she said, you can do what you want, but you can be in the kitchen and you can be in the office and that's it. And I'm not interested. Oh, that's fine. Right. And that's okay. Right. And, and the guitar, you know, you know, this thing called track star, online, Tony, where they put headphones on you and they make you guess the name of the performer or the song. No, I don't know. So I just was on this thing and, and I think they, you know, they obviously feed you the music that you would know better, which is for me a kind of boomer rock, you know, right? Earrings stuff. But I know that stuff really well and I'm obsessed with it. And my favorite escape from work is the guitar lesson I take on Sunday afternoons with this incredibly lovely guy. Now it's online more often than live. And it's just a total escape and I, instead of, you know, you're sitting at the computer hour after hour and instead of smoking cigarettes or what other people do to take a break, I just pick up the guitar and some Danish kid on YouTube teaches me how to play one song or another properly or some odd, you know, a Japanese guy. Are you any good? Are you good at it? I'm better than you. Well, yeah, I'm totally incompetent and a boob. I can, I tried when I was in my 30s. I brought somebody in to help teach me piano who said to me, Yeah, you do. Your tone deaf stop. You know, it's never going to work. So, you know, I would say I'm good enough to enjoy it, but not to torture anybody else with having to listen to me. Right, right. And for a while I was in a band called the Sequoias. Really? You know, in my 50s and into my 60s. Yeah, we weren't, you know, anything approaching good, but we, it was fun. You know, you, you know, get on the subway and take your guitar to Brooklyn to some rehearsal place and muddle through some stone song. And it was abysmal and, but it was fantastically fun. So, you know, I don't do that enough in my life. I just work on it. Mitch Album does that all the time. Mitch Album, he, Mitch Album plays in a band called the Rock Bottom Remakers with Dave Barry. Are they still around? Yeah, they play every once in a while. Dave Barry, who said to me once as he said to 10,000 other people, why do you play Gloria? And he says, because you can take it to guitar, throw it on the ground, and it will give you the first three chords of Gloria. It's, it's, well, it's only three chords. And they're the same three chords over and over and over again. Right. So it works. But you know what Lou Reed once said, Lou Reed said, Rock and Roll is two or three chords. And if you have a fourth chord, it's jazz. Lake Great Lou Reed. By the way, the Christmas music that you were just playing is great. Yeah. But the Christmas music you got to know, you got to play the Dylan Christmas album. What are you missing here? We're not allowed. I mean, we'd have to pay millions of dollars. We are allowed to pay. Oh, really? Yes, we are allowed to pay independent artists who want their music on. And then we can do that. We don't have to pay them. Right. But we have to, if you take known, you know, commodities and you play them just like I would, because I would play, I play Van Morrison every single day. And then I would owe Van Morrison $20 million. So we don't do that. Did you, at any point, at any point, did you have a particular fear as to how you were going to be portrayed? Was there one thing you set to yourself or you set to your wife? Oh, I shouldn't have done that. You know, yeah, of course. But the vanity was the greater fear. Yeah. I mean, if I'm being honest, but, but look, what I feared was how are they going to do this? Because it's a magazine with a long history. It's changed a lot in certain ways in the last 15 years because of technology. And we've added a lot to it. So, you know, podcast, we're doing what you're doing and video and how do we deal with the web and all these things, how do we deal with the internet? But I thought the guy, you know, in an hour and a half time, got a lot of humanity and information in it. I mean, I think it's fair to say that it's not a take down. That's, and it's more celebratory, more celebratory than anything else. But, and I hope people, you know, look at that and they stumble across it and they maybe pick up the New Yorker and read it. It's lovely. I think the big, the big thing that I have to face, if I'm being honest with myself, is the work that we're doing is in complete defiance of every trend that you know to be true, whether it's the diminishment of reading, because we have that thing that's in our pocket, which challenges it all the time. Or, you know, now the next, you know, 16 wheeler coming around the corner is AI. What's that going to do to people's behavior and how they absorb information, how they seek it out? It ain't the world, you know, that you and I started in with, you know, the Washington Post and the New York Times, three networks and blah, blah, blah. It's a vastly different, vastly different media universe. No, I watched it. I love that technique that they use when they went back in time and the years went backwards. I really enjoyed it. I thought it was wonderful. My only fear was that it was nostalgic, that it wasn't looking forward, that it was looking backwards. And, you know, that wonderful scene which begins and ends the movie where some guy on a newsstand is putting the New Yorker into the slots. That had great appeal for me, but I don't know about going forward. If anybody picks up magazines, if anybody reads magazines, if you just take it on the subway, because there's a certain look that you want to project, I don't know that. There's a lot of looks on the subway, I'll tell you that. I, but the fact that your son reads it gives me hope. I know he's not 15 years old anymore, but it's going to be 40. Yeah, but that's fine. I mean, you know, it's, the information universe that's out there is both more democratic than we began in some ways more interesting and varied and access to audiences is radically different and easier. But is it better? And I think what we're trying to do at the New Yorker, and we're not the only ones, is we're blessed with resources and to do it and an ownership that wants us to be at our best and freest. And so there's a great liberation in that. What kills me about some publications that they, you know, look at the Washington Post, which I was sad for 10 years and knew for much longer, and it breaks my heart. And it's not the reporter's fault. It's not the editor's fault. They're working their asses off. They want to be as great as they possibly can. But at some point, Jeff Bezos, after being a very good owner for a while, decided that it wasn't his interest to be as aggressive and fearless as the Marty Barron era, much less the Ben Bradley or Len Downey era. And so that's an opportunity squandered. And that concerns me. So in our own way, I want to juice this orange as best we can to get the most out of it. Yeah. It's the best magazine. It's maybe the only magazine that can survive. And I think this will help. I need to ask this, do the family watch it with you or without you? My wife watched it without me, and I sent it to my kids, and I never mentioned it again. I tread lightly where that's concerned. I want them to have their own lives untrammeled by, you know, their father hulking around in a sweater and telling people this cartoon is funny or not. I loved it. I loved it. Thanks for being on. I loved it. Oh, it's always a pleasure, Tony. David Remnick, boys and girls. Yes, you too. Yes. David Remnick, whose job at the New Yorker, where there are enormous egos because these people are great writers, his job is to herd elephants. It is hard to do. We will take a break. We will come back with email in Jingle. I'm Tony Kornhizer. You're listening to the Tony Kornhizer show. Yeah. Here comes Tony's mail back. Got your emails, backsets and your notes. Here comes Tony's mail back. Gonna re-stop for all of you folks. King Bay High School in South Carolina, different than Tom Mosser. Different. Very different. We've had that so long. Those high school kids are probably in the 30s now. Yeah, it's lovely. It's beautiful. You want to do the Bethesda Bagels? Yes, Bethesda Bagels. We love them. You will as well. Just go to BethesdaBagels.com for location in the DC area nearest you. Pop on it and you'll be thrilled. Before we get to the mail back, let me just say, you know, my temperatures rise in the jukebox blowing a fuse. Heartbeat and rhythm. My soul keeps singing the blues. Roll over, Beethoven. Tell Tchaikovsky the news. That's a great, great song. I stole from it once. I said, roll over, Valvano. Tell Sheshevsky the news. Just great. Thanks to our guests today. Chuck Todd, David Remnick. Thanks as well to today's sponsors. Remember, you can listen to us on Apple Podcast Spotify or to see if you get to show through Apple. Please leave us a review from Andrew and LA. And then we don't, this is a downer. I'm going to say it's a downer and it's an acknowledgement of something consequential that happened a couple of days ago. And this is the only one we're going to read. I know that the podcast is generally lighthearted. Haiku's about non-pression monkeys, customer wait times, songs about 44 year old quarterbacks, endless reminiscences about endless times and bunkers. But reality hit me in the face this morning. When I was a boy, my parents were close friends with Carl and Estelle Reiner during the show of show days. I wasn't close with Rob Reiner because being two years older than I saw me as a little kid. Rob's, Carl's and my paths crossed occasionally in LA as we supported similar causes. And Rob and I recognized our shared heritage to hear that his son may have murdered him and his wife as a jolt. I did not expect to read of someone I've almost known for 70 years go that way. Everybody feels this. Everybody feels this. Yes. From Nicola Fave in St. Paul, Minnesota. I've been watching PTI since day one. I've discovered this high quality podcast during the first year of the pandemic. Lucky enough to get a few emails right on the air. You're welcome to share this one as well, but it's not the intent behind it. I began refereeing hockey when I was 12 years old. My other brother was a referee. We both played along with our dad. It was our favorite sport, like so many fathers and sons. We spent countless hours at rinks and on the road to and from those rinks. We talked about how we played and dad would give us two cents. We talked about how we officiated a game and dad would give more than his two cents. Even when it was his son's, they had never quite trusted the refs. In 2001, I graduated college, moved across the country, stopped playing, continued to ref without planning it. My father and I fell into a habit where I would call him while driving home after games. He liked hearing if there were any interesting calls. If there's any fun chatter with the players or if I had to toss a coach, those were his favorite stories. But the hockey game was just an excuse to talk. We'd always transitioned to family, politics, movies, whatever. Some of our biggest laughs, biggest advice having during those calls. Usually the games were at night, dad kept me company the entire drive back, which was sometimes more than an hour. I called him the voice in the dark that got me home. I'm writing this now, because it's a five-year anniversary of my dad passing. That day, I was racing 400 miles to the hospital when my sister called and said I need to say goodbye right now. I wasn't going to make it in time. Pulled into a gas station. We had our last conversation fittingly over the phone. It was good talk. He was lucid. To his oxygen mask, he apologized, not being able to watch my kids grow up. I thanked him for teaching me how to be a good father. That's hard for me. That was it. It goes on. I wanted to get to that part. Late night in the season, while getting into a car after a game, I saw an alert that the Tony Coronas show had a new episode. Without giving it much thought, I hit play as I started driving. For the first time since I started refereeing, I wasn't sad on the drive home. I was laughing. I don't remember if you were complaining about a busted RV on your block, varmints in your garden, or Wander Swearrow, but you were definitely complaining about something, and I was laughing. Nothing will ever replace my dad. He was my best friend, but it always does. As it always does, time is soft in my loss. The show continues to be a joy, and hearing you and Michael truly enjoy your time together as father and son helps me remember and appreciate my dad. It's very lovely. Nicola Fave and St. Paul. Darrell Holiday in Medante, Ontario in Canada. Oro Medante in Canada. Over the years that I was serving as an educator, I could only find the time to enjoy PTI with you and Will Bond as part of my nightly routine to warring down for the days at events. But in the past three years, since I've retired, I've added the podcast to my regimen, whether it's Topic is Golf, Mice, Moths, Customer Service, Potato Farming, or Chessie the Dog. You and Michael and Nigel never failed to bring a smile to my face. As I happily follow along in my car while I walk around the neighborhood, in the spirit of the season, I wanted to express sincere thanks for the joy that you spread among all little throughout the year. Isn't that nice? Happy Annika Merry Christmas, all my best in the year coming 2026. From Phil Destito in Rome, New York, which is upstate. You had a run-in with a mouse over the weekend, so did we. Could this be another attempt at the start of the An animal revolution? Unlike your situation where you heard noises coming from the kitchen, I was alerted to our mouse by the traditional method of my wife screaming for me. There was a mouse in our son's room climbing up the curtains. Arming myself with two saucepans and a marshmallow roasting stick. I had my wife close the door and seal me in. The hunt was on. He was on top of the window sill, perched watching me with a look on his face to say, how you doing? I tried trapping him in the corner with the saucepan, but he leaped from the window sill down to the floor, landing on all fours, by the way, and dashed for the safety of the bookcase. I was able to corner him again and tried to get him out with the marshmallow stick to no avail. In preparing for my next attempt, he made a break for the closet with a stretch and a dive. I trapped him in the saucepan, getting cardboard underneath the pan. I carried the mouse out front, threw him into a snow bank. That's the last we'll see of him until the snow melts in March, maybe April, maybe. Happy holidays to you. So I was in the... You got three quart saucepan? I was in the gym the other day talking about the mouse, and a woman said to me, I'll tell you how to get them. You get a big bucket of water, fill the bucket with water, put peanut butter around the edges, and a ramp up, and the mouse will take the ramp up, and fall in, and that's it. And I thought, I mean, I didn't really ask what I wanted to ask, was like, you do this in the living room? Like, where do you get the ramp from? Tom and Jerry episode? Where do you get the ramp from? You got ramps in your house? Really? Chris in Apex, North Carolina. So are we now replacing flush the mouse with froze the mouse? We're not icing the kicker anymore. If he misses, we froze the mouse. If they call Time Mountain Basketball and the player misses a free throw, we didn't ice the shooter, we froze the mouse. Michael, get the trademark and the Johnny O code ready. We're back for more cash, man. Steve Gilmore, San Angelo, Texas. The same people who invented unwanted phone updates are the same ones who invented microwave bacon. Steve, the sick of fan, get ready. On the evening of December 17th, tonight, the brightest object in the sky will be Jupiter. Yes, the largest planet will be shining in the eastern sky next to the constellation Gemini. Best viewing is soon after sunset, and if you have binoculars, a few of Jupiter's moons may be visible. Cold or no cold, get out there and look. That's a big one. Is the weather supposed to be accommodating tonight? I'll check on that. The temperature is going to be fine. Yeah, it should be. It's going to be 40. It's just after sunset, it's six o'clock. 5.30, six o'clock. Five. Yeah. Five. So what's the temperature going to be? It's going to be, it's going to still be in the 40s. Yeah. So, but I don't know if it's going to be clear. From Ahsim, Ahsim. It says the A sounds like the first syllable of omelette and the Sim from a Sim card. My name used to be more rare until the Saints traded for an offensive lineman, the same name earlier this year. Who'd that? And you know who that offensive lineman is with the Saints? Who's that? He is of Romanian descent and he is married to UNESCO, the great shooter for the Liberty. Oh, really? Yeah. Wow. Yeah, I read that last night. On Friday, my non-masculine child turned 18 months old. That means she was born on 612.24, 18 months ago. How's that for numbers? She was born at 6.06 a.m., much like Michael attempted with the captain. I, too, we asked to have the official birth time recorded at 6.12 a.m. after the woman to whom I'm related by marriage tried yet failed to delay the pushing. She was good sport, though. The staff rooted for 612, too, but vehemently rejected my request of the numbers. Yeah, come on, let's have some fun. Today, 6.06 is also a great time. You know, seven kitchen outlets, top 3% Spotify wrapped. Edith Drew Holler, whose daughter I learned from the pod, also shares the same. Why can't they give you the time you want? An odd number of outlets. Scotcher-Om, Salsa, Alaska. The Apple phone update came with a particularly rough week. The first cold snap of the season hit last week with daily high temperatures hovering around, hello, minus 30. Yes, minus 30 degrees Fahrenheit. The line from our brand new well froze with leaving us without water. Once the well guy in his crew fixed that, thanks, Frank, the drain from our tub to the septic line froze. No showers available. That wasn't enough. None of our three vehicles would start. This was all within two days. And, of course, my iPhone started acting like a primadonna, requiring all my attention just to make it do its job. By the end of the week, it warmed up for two days. During that time, we received over a foot of fresh snow and then the mercury plummeted again. Minus 29 was the high today, with the forecast calling for the same over the next five days. I've lived in Alaska for over 21 years, so none of these inconveniences should surprise me. I'm what Alaskans call a sourdough, sour on Alaska, no dough to leave. The Apple thing, though, that really put me over the edge. My pipes may freeze. My iPhone should not fight the power, Grandpa. I love this guy. As part of a research project in the Dunlap lab here at the University of Alaska Fairbanks, I worked with a team that scanned the brains of 20 sled dogs with a 1.5 Tesla MRI. No complaints, as they all got a cookie. Partly cloudy tonight. Phil and Bartow, Rochester, Minnesota, you're welcome. I've referred your podcast to three others. My brother and brother-in-law, both sports nuts, are now official listeners. However, however, not so much with my wife. I've tried, but our long car rides to western South Dakota or Florida from Minnesota requires I listen to you with earbuds while my wife gets Nicholas Sparks novels on books on tape or endless loops of ABBA over the sound system. Forks to both eyes would feel better. So I've netted you one new listener if my golf math is accurate, a marketing whiz. I guess I'm not, although your advertising rate should go up by a little, right? Rome wasn't built in a day. Love your pod. And the team need to get the Nicholas Sparks and ABBA fans to make it big, just saying. Ben Cardin, not Cardin, the unofficial, official senator here, the official unofficial senator. So I hear Cygnus now, Evercore. This means we need a new saying for when you have to deal with them. How does this one work for you? Expect very inconvenient communication or rejection every time. Yes. Yes, that goes on the pile. I feel like that is a nice ring to it. That's very, very nice. Well done. From Joey Einfeldt in Joey and LA, in honor of his successful survivalist past Sunday, hear a handful of Philip Rivers is So Old jokes for you. Philip Rivers is so old that he showed up in Baltimore for his first Colts practice. Philip Rivers is so old that his opponents watch him on tape by using a VHS player. Philip Rivers is so old that he writes check downs instead of throwing them. Rivers is so old he prefers to bring his own oxygen tanks down today. Philip Rivers is so old that his helmet radio only receives AM frequency. That's very good. From Brandon Borzelli, Reginald is losing games as badly as Mo Green was losing money with his casino. If Reginald gets paid a visit by Michael with an offer to buy him out, then Reginald better cancel all upcoming massage appointments. Rest assured there won't be a placardous signpost of him at the National Zoo. And from Alex Bacchai in St. Louis, longtime fan of the podcast, watching PTI since 2005. Oh, this is for Jason. Oh, we like that too. So let's hold that for tomorrow. Hold on for Jason. You gave that to me. If you're out on your bike, tight everyone as always. Do wear white. Now they all get involved and they all got their gear already. So they're going to be all colored up in the maroon and black. Have I got a story for you? Now I was only five years old excited and awake on the night before Christmas my most favorite of all days when low I heard a noise downstairs so I crept out to catch a glimpse and there I found my mother dear with Santa locking lips he said to me go back to sleep this is just a dream no no no said I to key remove your hands from my mother please and he said look son it's me oh I think my dad is Santa Claus so so back to bed they made me go but I couldn't catch a wink with the thought of Rudolph and his friends up on my roof I just had to see me so up the chimney I went and there before my eyes the reindeer and that glorious sleigh and Santa I mean dad about to fly oh all right come on hurry oh I think my dad is Santa Claus we flew around the world to all the good boys and girls left gifts under their trees and we ate lots of milk and cookies the next morning I awoke with a fright had it all just been a dream but when I got downstairs my dad was waiting with a grin and a wink oh he said to me my secrets out now can you keep it please no no no said I to he I've got to tell my friends or else they won't believe when I say I think my dad is Santa Claus it's really true he's Santa I wonder if I'm gonna be Santa Claus one day I mean it There's need all around us, and plenty to spare But our hearts won't break The gospel's alive, but we're lulled into sleep That we just can't shake Dreaming of love, the words we could say We're finding a prayer we can't break Send us a savior to bind up the broken And repair the whole Then all of our hearts can tell us a story That all could believe in The kingdom of heaven is coming to earth The kingdom of heaven is coming to earth The cries of injustice and war without an even empty sound If peace comes with Jesus, then may this love be in his body found We're dreaming of loving the words we could say We're finding a prayer we can't pray So send us a savior to bind up the broken And repair the whole Then all of our hearts can tell us a story That all could believe in The kingdom of heaven is coming to earth The now heaven is coming to earth The now heaven is coming to earth Dreaming of loving the words we could say We're finding a prayer we can't pray So send us a savior to bind up the broken And repair the whole Then all of our hearts can tell us a story That all could believe in The kingdom of heaven is coming to earth The cries of injustice and war without an even empty sound If peace comes with Jesus, then may this love be in his body found We're dreaming of loving the words we could say We're finding a prayer we can't pray So send us a savior to bind up the broken Then now heaven is coming to earth Heaven is coming to earth