So my dad, he's an Italian immigrant, right? and when I was 1617 he started dating a girl who was 23 and also his His like college student like he was her professor. Holy shit. That's all yeah I mean classic stuff that's so the only thing it doesn't track as an Italian who's a who has an advanced degree What was what was this girl going to ITT tech he was her fucking each vac professor Dude, he doesn't have an advanced degree he teaches music Okay, we're back a dirtbag Italian fucking musician. Okay beautiful. Yeah. Yeah now that you get the idea he's basically I This has been going on. I'm 22 now. So a while And they're gonna get married now Geez, okay interesting So yeah going on. So you said you were how old 13 16? I Was like 16 when it started happening. Okay, so this bit is eight years Yeah, wow. Okay, and how old how old is your dad now? Shit he's 60 Like in his mid 60s mid 60s and this girl's 31. Okay, interesting. Hey, no, she's sorry. She's 28 She's so I'm gonna got the marathon down there Wait a second. Hold on a second if she's 28 now They started doing when she was 20 No, sorry, it's been five years my bad. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay when she was 23 you say she was 23 and now She's 28 so five years. Okay. Yeah five years. Okay. Yeah Gotcha, and basically this caused a huge fallout with my dad because my dad Was also my high school band teacher Oh, yeah, and he tried to like get her to play in like our school events and stuff like that Basically the same age Yeah, no pretty much it was like I was beautiful so good at the Bobo I tried to get her to like play in the band there and I had to like quit that shit I had to like I kind of like to get his 23 year old girlfriend to play with high schoolers at a high school production Yeah, yeah, I mean when he's 50 When he's fucking or maybe 58 59 whatever the fuck he was Yeah, that's fucking crazy. Okay, and Basically like this caused a lot of shit for me. We've been on and off We're kind of getting back on now like kind of rekindling our relationship a little bit and I'm really worried because he hasn't talked to me about it, but he's like We're in the same community as I friends of friends. He's talked to like these people about Like the wedding and like when it's gonna be and I'm I know he's probably gonna ask me to go and like I'm just I don't know if I want to you know, sure So let me just can I just nail down the ages here a little bit. So you are how old right now? I Am 23 you're 20 and this girl is currently 28 Yeah, okay, okay 23 28 and 64 let's say Yeah, yeah, that's about about right let's give him 62 Let's give it. Let's be gentlemen about this give him the benefit. Yeah. Yeah, we can be nice. Okay Yeah, I mean that's fucking crazy and so you're your your main problem here is just that just just so we're on record Is that she's clearly too young to be your father's? Girlfriend but wife is I mean definitely girl. It was definitely weirder When he was dating when he was in his late 50s dating a 22 year old or whatever I mean, it's still weird now. Don't get me wrong 28 and 60s is getting married is weird But it's not completely unheard of in society. Usually I assume your dad is broke Usually broke motherfuckers don't have the the thing to Don't have the swag to pull this but but that's your problem. It's just that she's much too young Yeah, and also like Every time I get back try to get back into his life He tries to like kind of include her with it which makes sense But she's she tries to act like a mother figure to me Like the same Sorry go ahead. Yeah, that's crazy because you're literally the same generation Yeah, yeah, it's like so fucking weird like She would tell me to stop like smoking weed when I was a kid She told me she had to go to rehab for we and I was like pussy like you know like there's not real I mean this girl must have had a horrible childhood if she's marrying your father, right? Yeah I mean, there's no way it wasn't unfortunately molested by like an uncle or something and like had like she has some weird old Guy shit going on plus wanting to have a kid wanting to like trying to like Pretend she's a mother and then still order in like, you know talking to a kid makes her feel more grown up Having an older guy makes her feel more grown up. There's got to be some some shit like that going on for sure, right? Oh Yeah, I mean her dad's like she's an FSU French horn major her dad's like a Florida cop Like I can't imagine it's great like growing up in that French horn major Jesus Christ. Yeah, that's fucking crazy She's not the brightest bulb that's for sure, but uh, yeah, no, it's weird. I don't know you basically are just like You don't mind having and what about your mind? What's you have a better relation with your mother? I'm guessing her Yeah, me and my mom we have a really good relationship And that's part of the reason I stopped talking to him is because she started getting involved in like She started saying shit about my mom. She started like, you know, she started like yeah, that's crazy You can't that's that's I started emailing for him and I could tell because like his English isn't that good, you know what I mean I mean, I hate listen. This is one of those situations where if this wasn't your dad, I would love this guy Like he's such a fucking piece of shit like love him in terms of he's hilarious Being like a guy with broken English who fucks his like student that's 30 years younger than and like she writes his email She becomes his personal secretary. Your dad's got a real bill bell check situation going on right now Not so funny because he's tried to like go to therapy and shit like that But it's just giving him like ammo to be manipulative But the thing is like he can't be verbally manipulative because he's so bad at English like That's really like it just comes off as like we just can see right through it So yeah, he's I stopped talking because he like started saying shit about like my mom getting what she deserved and shit like that And like he was just going off and like sounding just mentally unwell And like I checked in with him later later and I was like, hey, how are you doing? Like I care about you love you I want to make sure you're okay, but uh Yeah, it was weird I mean look dude, I think basically what you're describing here is yeah I mean your dad is clearly insanely in the wrong in every way here. I mean like like If this girl wasn't so young if she was age appropriate and she was trashing your fucking mom That that's grounds for never speaking to your dad again If he was dating if if this girl was really nice and sweet But you just felt really weird about this fucking relationship That would have been grads grounds to not want to have anything to do with it You combine the two plus she's like Trying to be pushy and act like your fucking mom and like act like a parent figure. It's like You you're completely on the right to have zero contact with you know to do with this I think some kind of compromise you could reach here is like and what might be good for you because again You're a young guy. This is good for you to like set your boundaries is to speak to your dad and just be like listen Like you know that conversation you had where you're like, you know, I care about you I want to check in on you you can say look you're getting married whatever I don't really approve of this Like this is fucking weird to me, but you're you're my father. I want you to be in my life uh The way that can happen is if you never disrespect my mother in front of me Your wife doesn't try and speak to me like i'm her child that most of our relationship is between me and you And if I have to see this woman She's she keeps a very respectful tone doesn't say anything about my my mother doesn't try and fucking parent me If you and you can you just have to say that and if he's cool with it great And if he's not then he can go fuck himself. It's kind of how I read the situation. Yeah Yeah, no, I definitely and honestly I was like that for a while. Um, it's just getting a little I don't know it is weird because like me and had a really great relationship growing up and part of me knows that like If the choice is between me and some young pussy, it's probably gonna be the young pussy. Well, I mean hold on stop right there We're talking about your father, right? And if that's if that's what you think of him, dude, which he deserves That's not the kind of guy you need to be doing anything for if your own father Look, dude a fucking 23 year old from fsu. It's like look that's cool to fuck that girl It's not cool to fucking choose that over your fucking son So the fact like dude that kind that's that sentence is heartbreaking Yeah, a son and I want you to get that because you live in this reality where that's normal That's fucking insane. And so Just because your father is the kind of piece of shit that would put You know getting pussy over his son That does not mean you you are not the one that has to change in this equation I need you to understand that right and so you can't resign yourself to that Personally, I would never do like that's what I'm saying is that like you need to know your own boundaries And I think right now you might feel this way because no disrespect You're just a little young and you still and you miss that Obviously, you want your dad you want to have that awesome relationship with your dad But you're not the one fucking that up you need to understand that the person fucking that up is your dad The person who's decided to Destroy that relationship is your dad and if you go back and you try and recreate it by pretending That him being disrespectful towards your mother and pretending that Even in the back of your head you knowing he would choose this dumb bitch over you pretending. That's okay with you That's not the relationship you want. You know what I'm saying? The relationship you want is him making you a priority So you would be kind of selling yourself out for no and you wouldn't get what you wanted You would get a hollow version of it and you would allow your dad to kind of like dictate your reality Again, that's how I see it. But you know, tell me if I'm off base here No, I think you're pretty correct. I think it's just it is Ultimately like easier said than done like it's just hard for me to get out of that mindset You know what I mean and especially really hard for me to like Think about like the future because like, you know, I'm family oriented I want to have kids at some point like my kids like, you know with my grand Them not having a grandfather like them being weird with my grandfather But I guess that's a bridge I cross when I get there, you know, so I appreciate it man exactly and yeah, this is fucking hard dude, but like also You have to make it clear like your dad might not think that you have the gumption To be like, you know what? Fuck you dad. I'm not going to be disrespected by you. I love you I want you to be in my life more than anything, but I will not be disrespected and I will not have anybody to disrespect my mom He might just not think that you're capable of that and I think you owe it to yourself to stand your ground on this And at least have him at least, you know Verbalize these things to him let him hear it what he does with that is up to him, right? If he tries to trounce through that boundary, that's up to you. Um You know, that's up to you to kind of keep it firm, but I think dude legitimately This is important for you in your life Because I have found and look obviously I think it's easy to say that I'm projecting people will say, you know I think I think you it can be read that I'm projecting about my own relationship with my father It's it's not exactly the same, but I do think It is it has been very helpful for me To stand up and realize what my boundaries are in my relationship with my dad that has helped me in the rest of my life I think a lot of the a lot of the like patterns that that are Uh, they get established for people happen with your parents one way or another, right? Whether they're romantic, whether they're just like friendship, whether they're power dynamics, how you look at authority figures, whatever, whatever I I can tell you from personal experience standing up to my dad when I didn't like the way he treated me or my mom Has made it so that it's been night and day Nobody treats me like that anymore in the rest of the world either You know what I mean like that I think that will help your That will help you in how you relate to the rest of the world Again, this is just my advice having dealt with a similar but not exactly the same situation No, I appreciate it Actually the reason I wanted to talk to you is because I know you've had Some similar issues with a Mediterranean father So like I don't know and for what it's worth for what it's worth You're younger than me and now at my age having like Kind of put my like I think having time apart has helped helped both me and my dad to realize like for me It helped me realize it helped me come around to what you know The fact that I really did want my dad in my life And I would be willing to compromise with him And I think for him it made him realize that I wasn't that I was serious and that like, you know He had that we had to have the relationship on on terms that were that he didn't purely dictate It had to be about compromise and May I don't think you'll necessarily get that if you immediately fold is sort of how I see it Hell yeah, no, I I definitely agree. Thank you, man. Yeah, and you got time. Don't fucking nothing anybody too soon Yeah I won't don't worry. Um and stop. I just have a confession. I need to make to you real quick. Please go ahead Um, uh your last boss and show like a year or two ago at the Wilbur I got really high on mushrooms like really fucking high on mushrooms and then I lied to you about getting pegged and you posted it on youtube Wow, that was you Yeah, that was me. I'm really sorry, buddy You can look back in the video and see like my hand crumpling under the weight of the mushrooms. So I deeply apologize Fuck dude, I knew those shows were actually great for crowd work. Actually, we got a lot of fun We had a lot of weird boston trash. Yeah, there's a lot of rowdy boston fucks out there Yeah, that's all right. That was the first theater weekend of my life. That was so thanks for being there, buddy Of course. Yeah, love your love your work. Thank you guys so much. Have a great day. You too, brother. Happy new year. Best of luck Man, that sounds like an extremely italian father predicament to have I mean When he said that she was like, well, I know if I had to choose between young pussy or me his son He would choose young pussy and that is you know, that's the kind of that's when I stopped respecting this guy Yeah, because there is something fun about an italian father who does like young pussy, but chooses his family over that Yeah, that to me is the best of both worlds. That's that's a crazy It's you know, you've gone too far when stave's rolled the podcast can endorse can endorse getting young pussy. You're right You're right. You're a real fucking monster if we're like, no, whoa, whoa Whoa Certain things pussy getting pussy from hot girls is not there's certain things that are more important than that When you find those things from us, that's tough When we we don't approve a hilarious italian a hilarious immigrant getting pussy. Yeah, you've gone way too far
