It’s Great To Be Drained

Hey Brooke. Hey Connor. Let out one more big sigh for me so we can get... Yeah. Hey man. Hey girl. What you what you doing? I've got my heating pad on today. Yeah. And it smells like fire. You think it's maybe short-circuiting while it's on your belly? Could. Tell me about the heating pad. Why does everyone really loves their heating pad? It's amazing. This is my first time using this one so it could be faulty. I don't know. But I need it today. Who gives a shit? My Tom. Yeah. What's going on with your... Should I even ask? I have my monthly. Oh okay. So I need my heating pad and shit like that. Were you the one that had that stinky little animal that you'd put in the microwave and it was like heavy? Yes. Like did you ever smell my stinky little animal? Yeah. I smelled your stinky animal. I think you brought it to California like the time we met. You brought your stinky animal that you microwave. Okay. For those who don't know, I had this like microwavable stinky little animal. I don't remember even what type of animal it was. Maybe like... I think it was a duck. It was not a duck at all. It was definitely like mouse adjacent. What was my stinky? Oh no. It was a pizza. Oh yeah. It was pizza. It was my pizza. It was my heatable pizza. And it just like when you heated it up, you know it had those little like beads in it. It had beads and legumes in there. No. Bead It had, it was full of beans. I promise. Beads. No, they fill those up with beans because you can heat up beans. No, it's beads. It's heatable beads. There's no such thing as a heatable bead. You don't just heat up beads. There's no such thing as heatable beans. All beans are heated. Yeah, but to eat. Not garbanzo. No, these were not beans. Actually, what is inside of like what's inside of a warmy? When it's being a warmy. And there was just like it smelled like just... Computer, show me beans. Really burnt popcorn. Yeah, it was really... Lavender scented. But what? It was not lavender scented. What are those? It was not lavender scented. It smelled like grandpa's feet. Flaxseed and dried French lavender. That is so not true. You weren't like wrong. That's a farce. It's flaxseed. Well, I want to know why it smelled like old like... It was like really burnt popcorn. In between someone's toes. No, it was not that at all. It broke. It was suspicious. Yeah, but it wasn't like bad smell. It was just like, hi, honey. There's my pizza. It was just like... And mine wasn't a warmy. So I don't... This is nothing against warmies. I love warmies. Warmies smell great. I feel bad about putting my warmies in the microwave because they're cute. They're actually cute little animals. I have a chicken and a duck. I know. It's kind of like putting them into the... I know. I don't like to watch. I won't put them in the microwave, but anyway, hello, hello. Let me make a sylvia plath warmy. That's not funny. That's not funny at all. I'm not... I didn't even smile when I said that. If you're listening on audio, only let the record show. I did not smile. Dude, I'm so tired, man. What a two weeks it's been. I know. Tired in an amazing way. Tired in like a blessed way. Like how I'm so lucky to have been doing so many things, so many amazing things that have drained me in an amazing way. It's great to be drained in a positive way. Yeah, it is. What's that quote that's like, I'm complaining about... I'm so lucky to be complaining about the things that I would have killed to do. I really feel that. That's awesome. Thanks. So happy for you. Yeah, we... We have our live shows. Can we do the recap after we... of the last week? I guess we start with last week. I think we need to recap our live shows. Okay. Yes. So I think we already recapped San Diego and that I need... I'm moving to La Jolla. Yes, we did. We talked about La Jolla. And then we had Irvine. Yes. Which like, I don't have much to say to you. I love Irvine and everyone came to Irvine's show. That was so much fun. It was amazing. Yeah, that was great. And then... Should we tell everyone what the structure of the show was? Yeah, I guess, yeah. Basically, if we just came out and we kind of shot the shit for a little bit like a podcast and then Izzy made this amazing presentation and they were different at each stop. And it was basically each slide was something that we have learned over the course of the five years that we've been doing this podcast. So for example, one slide could have been NATO, another slide could have been internet cables. And we would essentially... We would teach the audience what we had learned. Sometimes we were so spot on. Sometimes we needed Izzy's help. But yeah, it was a learning opportunity for everyone. Izzy was able to join us on stage. Izzy was amazing. And be our guiding light. Yeah, Izzy was our guide. It was so much fun. And it brought up like fun comedy. It really was. It really was, Brooke. A live podcast in many ways. It was. It was amazing. I had a blast. I feel very comfortable on stage. Yes, you crushed it. Connor, you freaking crushed it. You better hop back on your high horse because you should be up there riding off into the sunset. You should be up there with me. You freaking crushed it. We are both sidesaddling our high horse and riding away. Yeah, bound to be like... The British are coming and the British us. The British equal us. Okay. So we did amazing. And then Sacramento was so unique. Sac City was a unique experience. Sac City was so unique. The show itself, love. Adored. The city is a unique thing. It was a unique thing. And I think that that's... Like when I tell you about... Sometimes they go on tour and many times they say, you are performing in XYZ. And so that's what I announced when I'm performing in Miami. And then what they don't tell you is that the venue many times is one hour outside of where you announced that you're performing. Right. And people get so mad when you do that, I learned. That happened to me with my Phoebe San Francisco Tour Stop. Because I said San Francisco and everyone is like, this is not San Francisco. I'm sorry. I do want to request some grace because when we receive it, like I'm not googling the venue, I'm just excited to go to some place that's adjacent to the city. And listen, many times those places are not in like the most, how you say, desirable areas. And many would even say, don't walk alone in these areas. But it's fun. It's a fun experience. It's so unique and you make the best of it. And that's what we did. And it was so much fun. SAC was in SAC. Our SAC venue was very much in SAC. No, I know. I know. I'm saying like when I tell you like, like my Miami location was like, genuinely one hour outside of Miami. And so like completely different county and city. And people were like, I, you know, like that's just an example. But it was just like, no, this was in Sacramento. Yeah. Yeah. It was I divulged a little bit from the Sacramento. I like Sacramento. That was my first time there. It was pouring rain and in thunder. We stayed in a government themed hotel, which was amazing. Okay. So like we probably should have known because that it was called the citizen hotel. I would never assume that just because the hotel is called the citizen, it would mean it's government themed. It was like cool. It was definitely on the right side of history. No, you say that. And then like, I was looking closer at the quotes in the elevator and they were all Ronald Reagan. So I'm confused. No, I think it was, oh, they were. Yeah. I guess I wasn't reading closely, but I took it all as kind of like warning signs. No, it was like a warning sign. Like be careful. It was all very much like the people like we throw over the government. Like, like we need to we need to create a coup right now in the lobby and overthrow the government. Which right now feels like, yeah. Yeah. But then it was like, or you guys just like this all the time, you know, like it didn't see like a newer rebranded hotel based on like who's currently in office. It was like, no, this is like our whole thing. Like we just like love the idea, the theme of toppling like a no oligarchy, but like just in general. Sure. I think it was just like kind of almost even like American history in a way. Kind of. But it was, it was, I like, I was, I guess basically like I was having trouble like figuring out what like who was the designer, like the choreographer of all of the like quotes, I guess, mostly. We could look into the citizen hotel like in bonus, maybe. The history of the citizen hotel and staff. Oh yeah, we should. I'm curious because that was like the citizen hotel. They have started to make hotels that are almost personified into like a type of person like that. It was like a type of person and then the moxie hotels like I love the mox. It's so funny that you love the moxies. The moxies like absolutely like you're allowed to. One of the ones I know you're allowed to get for like a couple hours during the day, which is like definitely like so that you can like. That's not my moxie. It was one that I went to. But like that's the the the moxies. The one that I stayed at in Ireland when it was like, want to go to third base and it was like the elevator asking me if I want to go to third base. And I was like, no elevator. I'll take the stairs. My moxie. My mom is definitely more modest. Which moxie are you talking about? I love the it's hard for me to always, I don't know the difference between the Lower East Side and the East Village because I always put the wrong one in and I always go to the wrong moxie. Oh yeah, there's two. It's one of them. Okay. But I and I when I was just in New York, I stayed at a hotel that was exercise workout themed. Which wasn't a match. Each room had its own medicine ball. They put a medicine in the room. Yeah. And those like stretchy bands that you pull were coming out of the wall. I it does make you wonder if that was like those bands are expensive. I have some of I have some personal bands. And they're not super cheap to put those in each room. Like it almost seems like they could have just built a gym. They had a gym. Oh, yeah, it was very it was a workout based hotel. You can really I guess you can really do whatever whatever theme you feel like doing for the hotel. You can just do kind of themed hotels that I want to stay at. Oh, that's interesting. And there will be one in my town that you create will be booking cats. This is going to be a by the way, is going to be the name of me and cats bookstore, broken cats, books and cats. Is that not insane? Oh, that's really good. Oh, that's really good. Is that not crazy how that worked out? It's like we were born to do this. You just let the let the universe figure out the universe talk. Yeah, for a second, if you don't mind, let them lead and you're chatting out for a bit so the universe can speak. Okay, Sac City. I had a real almost P my pants moment IRL on the stage. So yeah, our live shows are pretty fun. You could say that again. Yeah. And I know a lot of people were asking about merch. I think we did sell out of merch, right in Sacramento, but we will be selling in Sacramento. Okay. So we will be putting the tour merch online and then watch this space. And then you I mean, you were just like a little tour tour bird this week, because you then you hit Phoebe right after I did. I had a little mini Phoebe press tour in New York Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, four day, four day run. Yeah. Let me go through that briefly. Yeah, hit it. On Wednesday, I did something so out of my comfort zone. It was a press opportunity that will be posted so you will see it. Let's just say so out of my comfort zone. So cute, not a match. And y'all will be able to see that and so cute, not a match. Then yeah, I mean, I just went on a lot of podcasts and all these podcasts were very much like they had a theme. Yep. And so they wanted to stick to the subject, which makes sense. Of course, like that's what podcasts do. Connor, I had a very hard time saying on topic and not doing what we do. And God bless the hosts. Like I could, I think they may have gotten a little bit frustrated with me. They do. And that's why I, I'm like a one and done podcaster because I don't get invited back on the right. They like have wanted to talk to me about dating. And I was like, I have nothing to say there, but have y'all heard of the internet cables that run across the Mariana trend? Brooke, yeah, Brooke, it's hard. We are a match made in heaven. This, no, we really do. And also like this is my milking farm. Like I have to go like have this release once a week, you know, like so that I can continue my day to day. And I don't put that onto someone else. Like I have to put that here completely. I didn't realize I just really, truly didn't realize that like we are meant to podcast together because I was having a very hard time not doing what we do on other podcasts. Oh, Brooke, I'm so happy you have felt like me too. It's really something. And people, yeah, I'm sorry if I pissed anyone off. I'm trying to, I'm trying to think who, I think it was on tanks is last time I went on. She was like, we didn't do any of the stuff that I had planned. And I was like, I'm really sorry. And then the comments were very much like, I mean, you guys didn't even finish once in it. And I was like, that's really my bad. Yeah. No, it's, it's not your fault. And also all of these podcasts were very like dating forward because I wrote a romcom. And so that was really hard because they were like, Oh, tell me about your last X, like how did that relationship end? And it's like, Oh baby, like wrong person. I love you though. Baby, I'm the only car in the parking lot. Oh baby, if, if my ex is driving the bus, who's driving the plane? Then it's a Waymo. So maybe there is no plane. Maybe there was never a plane. So that was amazing. That's very funny. Hey guys, we want to thank a sponsor of today's episode of 1-800-Flowers. Oh my gosh. Think about the mom and the moms in your life. Mother's Day is around the corner. I've just found out it's May 9th or 10th. It's coming up though. Think about what they've done for you. These, these, these mother figures in your life. When I think about my mom and I think about how Mother's Day is coming up, I always like to think how like when I, when I want to call someone, I know that she's always there to talk for one and a half hours. If that's what I need. And on a walk, we can talk, we can talk, we can ramble. And she always has like all the fun gossip for the other people in the neighborhood. And I just, I love that. She deserves so much. 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It felt so lux and thoughtfully put together and I immediately thought about how my mom would freak in the best way if she got something like this. Mother's Day is Sunday May 10th and bouquets are selling out fast. Trust me, don't wait. Declaring your double roses offer before they're gone, visit 1-800-Flowers.com slash BNC. That's 1-800-Flowers.com slash BNC. 1-800-Flowers.com slash BNC. And then, so did a lot of that. Oh, I saw Omari. Yeah. So here's the thing. Wait, who did you, who was the married? Mary was John Cameron Mitchell, who I had not really heard of before, but he was amazing. And I, like, I didn't want to say this before, but I did not think I was going to like Omari because it's, one, I'm not really into plays. I'm a musical girl. Two, I'm not really into like, can't be theatrical humor. I like dry humor. And so I just wasn't expecting to like it. I did, which was great. I was so happy. It was so smart. And I didn't really know anything about it, and it was just brilliant. And so, and the length was perfect. It was like an hour. Wow. Yeah. No intermission or anything. I think, I don't know if you will like it. I'm so curious because it really is like theater, theater humor, like just like theatrical, I guess. I feel like if I'm going to the theater to go see a play, like I can just shift into that mode. Yeah. You know, like the things that I don't like are like, I go to a movie, and then I find out 10 minutes into the movie, it's a musical, and I'm like, oh, Jesus Christ, like I'm stuck. You didn't tell me. You know, that's like showing up somewhere in a sweater, you don't have like an undershirt, and you're like, wow, I'm just about to sweat for like an hour and a half. Right. You know. So, but like, I feel like I could, I don't know, I kind of want to go when my Rudolph is Mary. That I think you, yeah, how could you not love that? I know. If I just like in the presence of Mrs. Rudolph, like I feel like I'll be okay. Yeah, we will all be okay. Well, just in the, in the, in the, the camp of books right now, I do want to like announce with my chest. Yeah. I finished a book. I finished reading a book. I can't believe I, yes, I can't believe out of all of the books that you've started, this is the one that you finished. I know. I take back everything I said. I mean, and you know, it's crazy as I finished it once I sat down, and I started reading, I finished it in three days. And just to clarify, this is Stoner, correct? This is Stoner. I have it here with me. Give a book report. Yeah. So this was a devastating book. Tell us about the themes too. I know you love those. I mean, to be, to be totally fair, and like, I'm not going to give any spoilers, like just know I'm a hater, like I, for each, each specific reason, I hated every single character in this book. I hate the main character. I hate his wife. I hate his child. You're supposed to know, right? I don't really know. I don't really know. The interesting thing is like, you know, Manchester by the sea, where I was like, I couldn't even feel sad for this guy because his life is so horrible, and he does nothing to fix it. And he's like in a prison of his own making. And so that was a lot like this book, and this author, before he passed, he's from the, he's from Europe somewhere, I don't know. And I guess that this didn't really gain popularity in the United States because Americans were like so upset. It was so upsetting for them because I've had depressing. This book was because of this guy's life because it's, you know, he had this, everything that made him happy, like there were very high highs and very low lows for him. And it was like a very unremarkable life that he had. And he didn't get as far in his career as he had wanted to and whatever. And so he gets, this author gets reported back that like, that's how Americans feel about this book. And he's like, Oh, really? Well, like I really, I'm shocked by that because I think this is most people's lives. Like this is a very typical life. And so I don't know. Americans had like a hard time swallowing that pill, that nut. And no, but I finished it. And I, I mean, it's hard to talk about it because like there's no way for me to explain this, but just like everyone in this book may be mad. And I really want to, I really quickly want to also say, so like I finished this book and I'm immediately like disgusted by my phone because I was like so enthralled with this storyline and like, not that I was like even really enjoying it. I just like needed to, I needed to finish it. So I finished this book. I want to really, and then guess what? I drive, I drive down to Barnes and I drive down to Barnes and I want to pick up dungeon Carl, Carl, right away, same day. I want to really quickly read you. I want to show you how I ended this book. Shot, Chaser. I'm going to read the last passage of Stoner. And then I'm going to read the opening passage of dungeon Carl, Carl or Kyle. Here we go. He let his fingers rifle through the pages and felt the tingling if those pages were live. The tingling came through his fingers and course through his flesh and his bone. He was minutely aware of it and he waited until it contained him until the old until the old excitement that was like terror fixed on him where he lay the sunlight passing to his window shown up on the page and he could not see what was written there. The fingers loosened and the book they held they had held moved slowly and then swiftly across the still body and fell into the silence of the room. Did he just pass? I was holding a crying, scratching, squirming and spitting cat named Princess Donut Queen and Chunk. That sounds amazing. Hi, Princess Chunk Donut. It's just like people love Princess Donut. I'm having a hard time with dungeon crawler Carl. How far did you get past that for sentence? Yeah, I'm on page eight. You're having a hard time? Yeah, it's just like you read about this guy with this horrible, horrible life and it goes through World War One and two in this book. And then Carl is talking to a troll and being like, hey man, back off troll. I'm holding Princess Donut Chunk. I didn't realize that dungeon crawler is based off of video game. Oh, so that would, I mean, that totally makes sense. It's completely, it is video game ask. Like it's like he has levels and it's like, like, okay, first eight pages. I don't know what happens. Okay. Like I don't know what's going to happen. Obviously I'm texting Dylan about this book. Good. I was going to say text Dylan. I texted Dylan too. He's reading Crescent City right now. What a great guy. I know. He said he said he said he listened to these books and he said he got, he said it was, let me just read what he said because it was like, Yeah, Dylan's a big audiobook guy. It was a really easy read. Author doesn't waste too much time world building like relates everything to modern day. So he says the inside kind of looks like a target kind of thing, but then he's really good at building a climax and big action scenes where you don't know what's going to happen. But it is genuinely so fictional that it's like trolls and goblins and like a little rat man, a man that looks a man that is a rat. Yeah, I'm having a hard time with that. I don't want to read sometimes it's really like whiplash to go from Stoner to something like Dungeon Crawler. Do you want to read a sort of bridge first? Yeah, I think I have to because like I'm really not like it's not, I like the like more historical fiction things because it's like, okay, let's find you a bridge. But I think this is amazing. I'm so proud of you. Would you consider downloading Goodreads? Yeah. Oh my gosh, I need to put, you're right. I need to put that my thoughts somewhere and like talk to a community of people. Please download Goodreads. I want you're going to log the Stoner as your first book of 2026. I want to see your review. I'll engage like comment. And then you can start building your to read shelf. My repertoire. Yeah. I'm so excited for you and very proud of you. Thanks. I'm pretty excited about that. That was just like the whiplash is a good way to put it. Yeah, we'll find you. It just bumped me out. I was like, oh, I was like so in this zone. Like now I'm not in this zone anymore. You could also text Matt. I should text Matt. Matt's a great reader. Matt has a book club. I won't speak on his behalf, but there's definitely a lot of drama happening there. We went to Barnes and Noble yesterday. Matt and I like have such an amazing friendship and we do really fun things together. Tomorrow we're going to a few different libraries across Los Angeles and collecting unique stamps. But he you could join his book club. I don't know if I will. Right now. You can talk about it. You can talk about it. They're definitely in a state of they're in a flex state right now for sure. There won't speak on it too much, but the hierarchy is a little fragile right now. Yes, the hierarchy is fragile. So they're thinking about new members. So they're considering it considering new members. I would reach out if I were you. That's fabulous. Yeah. So you guys enjoy your stamp collecting. Send me updates. Yeah. Oh, I will send you updates. But this will be my first LA library card, which is long overdue. Wow. I got a New York library card before you get an LA library card. I know it's so dumb of me. But calling you versus coming out with a book and Alex Cooper is not not a book, a movie. Alex Cooper's in the movie. Yeah, Verity, right? Yeah, is that crazy? Yeah. Alex Cooper's in the movie. But as her self, right? Like as her fictional self, like, yeah. That makes sense. No, but call her daddy is in the movie. Is it call her daddy in the book? No. Okay, that's to me like, am I the only one who when there's something that like they try to throw in for relevancy like make it so today? Like, are you not pulled out of the TV or movie that you're watching? A lot of people are. I'm so confused. Like how I know it keeps happening because now you've now you have this person on board that is going to be like, I'm stoked to be a part of this project post, post, post. And like that will increase viewership to see that moment. But like, wow. I don't know. Yeah, I'm not a fan of that. No, I don't really like that either. But that's like when people are like, Oh, I watched Euphoria. Did you watch Euphoria? No. It is so bad. I'm not going to because like, I love the first two seasons. And that's my Euphoria. And this is just going to be a different show that I don't feel interested in. I mean, you truly have people that are we're in a contract and then took some time off and became like actual despiens like Jacob Elordi is like such an incredible actor. And then you see him do this thing. And he's talking about only fans and like tech talk. And it's like, no, go run. Yeah, it's so bad. Sam Levinson needs to go. And Ryan Murphy, like all of these people that are like pumping out so much TV, like need to go do whatever drugs they were doing. Mocking farm derogatory. What? Mocking farm derogatory. Yeah. I mean, it's just it's very, it's very like, you know, those things that always pop up in between people snapchat stories. And it's like an app that you download to watch short dramatic video stories. Yeah. It feels like one of those, you know, that's a good comparison. Yeah, I'm not going to watch. I know. Which is a shame. But you're truly not missing. I was watching with your people. I'm looking around at the room and like, is anyone I'm just John the floor. It seems like a parody. Yeah. Really, really crazy. And it low key became narcos. Like, I don't know. It's like very drug. I mean, I know it was always kind of drug heavy. Like that was the whole right thing. But now it's like crossing borders with is it like following what the plot from season two or Rue got like into whatever situation she got herself into? It's I'm kind of unclear. But yeah, she still owes that that young woman some cash. Yeah. Okay. But like they're fully like crossing borders with cocaine in their ass. Yeah. Yeah. It's like this was this was low key fun because you guys were like, like this was all happening wrong side of the tracks high school, you know, like I didn't sign up for this. Yeah, this part. I am going to pass on it. You know, it was good that I also watch Big Mistakes. I was so right about that. It's so good. What's that one? I talked about the one with Dan Levy. Okay. And Taylor Rotega. I watch it and Jack in and in. It is so good. Really? So good. Yeah. Okay. This is this is the kind of like writing and acting where like I can tell that they had fun with it. Like when they do the scenes, they're like, it's almost improv. They're like, you have to get from here to here in this scene, but they're like kind of talking over each other and like having fun with it. It's really good. Okay, I'll watch. Yeah. I kind of didn't know that every show this year was going to be like have some like level of gang and like Cartel level to it. I don't think that's what we're doing. My favorite kind of show. Really? Yeah. Or at least like, because there have been so many shows I love. I guess like Breaking Bad and Weeds. And like once it gets into the like smuggling Cartel, politics of the Cartel, I kind of, they lose me. I know. Whatever happened, I haven't had fun. Yeah. No one's having fun anymore. I like more of like a small town dealer than a like big drug circle. There it goes. Yeah. I like when the drug dealers keep it like in the family. Yeah. Keep it in the family. Yeah. Once we start getting political and there's like drug lords involved, you lose me. What I was going to tell you this morning before I forgot was there's just really, really, really mean girl that makes smoothies at the store down the street. She works every single day and she hates me so much. Like really, really, truly like won't look at me, won't talk to me. Maybe she likes you. I don't think it's like that because she like hates me and it's like visceral. Like I can see it and I'm like, hey, I get it. Like if and I'm just kind of like, what can I do here? Because like when something like that presents itself to me like a challenge, I'm like, I'm going to overcome this and I'm going to, we will be friends. It has been a climb to get her. But today she smiled and kind of left. Oh my God, you've got her wrapped around your finger. No, I really do. When I go order my clean, my clean green smoothie, I saw her on a smoke break one day. So I know that she is love cigarettes. And so one time I brought cigarettes like in my pocket and I had to let them hang out a little bit and you know, I don't even smoke cigarettes. Good thinking. Thanks. And I was just like, look, like I'm going to, by all means necessary, like I'm going to get her on my side. I don't even know why, but I got her to smile today and I'll continue to work on that. Very good. Before I move in two weeks, somehow, do you have an apartment? Oh God, no. But my landlord did ask if I can move out a week early because they have a new person that's going to move in. I said, I don't really understand what you mean by, do you think it'd be possible for me to vacate a week early? Like make that make sense to you. Make that make sense to you. I get that. She wants you to leave a week early. I know, but like, I know it makes sense to her. Like in what world can you ask someone that signed a lease to move out a week early? You say no. Yeah, I said, I don't have a place to live. But if anything changes on my end, I'll let you know and we can figure out what that looks like. So now I've left it. Like you can pay me back one fourth of my rent. Good job. Thanks. I was proud of myself for that. That's good. That's a good thing. I toured my second place. That was so, so, so awesome. Such cool vibe. And they said, you're not allowed to have anyone over to your apartment. And I said, at all, they said 100% at all, the neighbors are very specific. I go, what do you mean? They're like, yeah, they're just very specific. And I was like, why are the neighbors ruling the entire place? I don't know. And I didn't even bring up like, can I have, I wasn't like, oh, can I entertain here? They're like, just heads up like you can't bring anyone over to your apartment. And I was like, I'm confused. Like why a broker is telling me that. Right. What happened here before me? By the way, no fridge. Oh my God. That just happened. Marshall's moving to New York. And he sent a video of his new apartment. And he was like, this is my new apartment. He wasn't there. He was just getting the video from a realtor. And I said, Marshall, there's no fridge. And he didn't, he had not realized that. Two apartments. Not even a place for a fridge. And like he wanted it in his bedroom that was also, it's a studio. So it was one small room and the kitchen that I don't think I would have even fit in. I think just for like few, few thousand dollars. And like the fridge genuinely, if you wanted, you could either pick one fridge or bed. What would you prefer? Definitely bed. Yeah. Two places I've toured. No fridge. And then one place I toured. One place I toured. Mini fridge. Because like everyone needs a fridge. It is kind of funny that that's not like a requirement. Everyone needs a fridge the same way everyone. I would say it's like, it's right below shower. But like it is like kind of up there. People in Ireland and I think London, somewhere, they don't put anything in the fridge. They have pantries. What about they need to put in the fridge? What? What about food they need to put in the fridge? I don't think that, I mean, like, if you're over, if you're over there in Ireland or, you know, no offense, I know that some people from there listen to this. Your food sucks. What if they need to buy meat? I think that they just eat it right away. I don't know about that. It's really bad. No offense to you guys. Like, sorry, I did not, I was not like, I was pretty much like withering away while I was over there. I want to go to Ireland one day. It was bad. I told you that one night where like, finally I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go have like a meal. Like I need to have a meal. I need to have like a big steak. I was like out of nutrients. Like I was low on iron. My blood sugar was plummeting. And I was like, I'm gonna go have a steak and a Caesar salad. Like that's what I need to have right now. Like that's gonna bring me back and a diet coke. No ice. My steak comes out. It's carpaccio. So it's paper then the steak. They cut it up like this. There's paper then raw. And I don't know room temp. And then the Caesar salad comes out. Just like it looked like they had just cast a net until a very shallow pond and caught every little fish they could find and stack them up almost like. Yeah, almost like cartoon style stack of fish on top of the salad. And so like one by one, I moved I removed these like little metallic anchovies just like off my plate. And I'm like, maybe, maybe like now that I've removed them. No, I mean, the whole thing was like, and I know that there's, I know that there's anchovies and Caesar salad. But like, the less I know the better, like seeing that pile and then just moving them over to the plate, like I tasted them, you know, like, I don't want to taste. No, I don't want to taste fish on a Caesar salad. I got it, man. I wouldn't want that either. Did you hear that? It was my stomach. What's going on with your stomach? Oh, it's making tooting sounds. Your subscription was renewed this week. My subscription to your monthly. Oh, nice. I think this is separate. Oh, I mean, there's so many things going on. It's incredible. It's incredible how many things can go on in the same body. Yeah, I agree. Yeah. Maybe you could read Lena Dunham's I bought it. I just started listening to the audio book. It's incredible. Mine came in. It came in yesterday. Okay, we're pretty excited. I've heard it's like, I heard it's crazy. I'm so excited. I love her. She's so funny. The way she writes stuff is just like they keep clipping things and like headlining things and it's like not the way she wrote it. Like she said that Adam Driver threw a chair at a wall next to her head. Right. But it was like, and then someone was like, no, that's the relationship they had with their work. And like they were just like very in the moment. And I was like, bro, could you imagine we're podcasting so hard that I throw a chair at you? I'm excited to get to that part because I've only seen the headlines. So I'm wondering like what she actually said. No, I mean, it was quoted word for word. It was just like, no, but she was like, we were so passionate about this. Like that's what the work was like. And like, I could see Adam Driver's character throwing a chair at her. The headline like painted it like Lena, like had a big problem with him. No, but that's not what she meant. Right. So I'm excited to see what she meant when I got there. I had something happen last week that's pretty fun. I was home all week last week. My dad had surgery. So we were just like in and out. Just like he had to stay at the hospital for like a couple days. Right. And so the nurses came in. It was like new nurses that I had not seen. And they come in and they're like, Hey, we need, would you do us a favor? To me, because I was the only one in the room besides my dad, would you sign as a witness? And I was like, Oh my God, what are they about? I'm about to pull my dad's awake. I was like, you know, like, what are you about to ask me to do? They're like, can you come to another room? The patients next door need a witness on a non resuscitation, like a no resuscitation, do not resuscitate form. Yeah. And I was like, you want me? Sure. Yeah. I never get picked to, you know, and so I'm like, okay, yeah, I'll go. And like all my way out, I was like, should we do a swap? Do they want to come in and sign for him about my dad? Was the person that they were signing about like awake? I didn't look at the person in the bed. Okay. I was just, the story is about, and I'm realizing that I haven't even heard anyone laugh or you haven't smiled or anything. Like, well, I'm just like mostly curious. Yeah, I didn't want to look because, you know, like everyone's kind of naked in bed, you know? Yeah. But I did a little like I was like, oh, you know, because in situations like that, like I have a hard time not being a wise guy. And like I do need to like make light of everything, which is like not really my place when I'm signing a do not resuscitate form for someone else as a witness. Sure. But I was like, oh, should we do a swap a room? Should we have someone come in here and sign for him? And I was like, you want, and no one not even randomly, my dad didn't think that that was funny. Okay. Yeah, that's hard. That's like a read the room situation. Yeah. No, no, no, I didn't, you know, at that time, like, I hadn't really been talking, I had only really been reading stoner, right for like days on end. So I wasn't brushed up on the room, right? Understood. And I asked them, I was like, can I talk about this on my podcast? And they were like, like, you're not under hippo only we are. So I was like, okay, can't hurt. And then also last week, I saw the craziest tweet while I was at home. What? Because you know, when you're you're telling your parents who like, they've had iPhones as long as I've had an iPhone, you know, like, I didn't grow up with technology in the way that kids are now, you know, like, we didn't grow up with an iPhone, right? You know what I mean? I do. My parents got an iPhone the same day I got an iPhone, we got the family. Such a good point. Like, so when they say things, I'm like, we've had the same amount of time with these devices, like, what do you mean? How do I screenshot this? That's such a good point. And why has that never been brought up before? I don't, I don't know. Like, and I get that like, yeah, we're completely fried. And yeah, we have so I guess like, the saying is probably more aimed towards social media, which like they don't spend all day on, but like they do because they send me reels of like dogs dancing and things and AI all day. And like random vitamins I should be taking. But I read this tweet the other day, are you ready for the heaviness that will that will be bestowed upon you about T minus 10? I'm ready. Oh, man, I got to read it. Oh, crap. That sucks. Hang on. I have it. That's fine. Okay. Because I don't want to mess it up because it was it was really well written. And I was like, Oh, wow, that's going to be that's going to be a banger on the pod. Let me find it. I know exactly what it looks like. So don't worry. I'm going to put my mic to my stomach so you can hear this. Yeah, I would actually love to. I found it. Okay, never mind. My mom recently asked how to take a screenshot. At first I laughed, but then I remembered she taught me how to tie my shoes. You know, because it's like what dumb you don't know how to tie your shoes. Like, instead of getting frustrated, you just teach them over and over and over again. And I got it. Oh, that's really sweet. It is sweet full circle. You have some patience. Have some. Thank you for sharing. Yeah. Yeah, I'm happy to. Yeah, I'm really happy to. In like more pop culture news. Yeah. The casting for Emily Henry's Beach Read. Yeah. Has come out and people are so pissed. I don't think I've ever seen people as pissed over an announcement, a casting announcement. But it's we knew how do you say her last name? Denver. We knew Phoebe D was going to be in it. We did not know who was going to play Gus, who is a beloved character to many. And it is going to go ahead and be Patrick S. Yeah. As in Patrick Schwarzenegger. And people are very upset. And you might be wondering how I'm feeling. We talked about this privately. Yeah. Yeah. But you might be wondering how I'm feeling publicly. Yeah. Here's the thing. Here's what I'll say about this. Oh, are you actually going to say something right now? Yeah, I'm going to say what I just what I said to you. Okay. Which I don't remember what it was necessarily. But I will say that I've read four Emily Henry books and Beach Read is my least favorite. So I don't have that much skin in the game because I'm kind of just like whatever I didn't connect to Gus as much as everyone else did. So I don't have the passion that a lot of people have about this. I started white lotus and it's I know it's different because this is a rom-com and I also kind of have trouble seeing him as a leading man romantically. But I started white lotus being like this fucking guy, you know, and then kind of ended like with such a soft spot for him that I have hope that the same thing could happen in this fingers crossed. I do. I have hope. I'm not like excited about it. Like I don't really see the vision, but I'm holding out hope. And that's what I have to say. Like I'm not calling it off completely. I'm hopeful that he could surprise us. That's what I'll say. I don't see it. I said at all, but I'm hopeful. I said to you, yeah, I don't think I don't, I mean, I just said to you, I don't think he has rom-com and I don't either has too much for rom-com or not enough for rom-com. And I don't know what it is. He could also surprise me. Right. I am hopeful that he could surprise me like he did in white lotus. So, Did someone just vibrate? What? Did someone just vibrate? I mean, probably. Your phone is sounding like an, or your stomach is sounding like a notification. My phone is on silent. Oh, wow. I'm getting phantom vibrations. Obviously, there's a lot of heated rivalry look-alike contests, but there was this one recently where the winners looked more like Shane and Ilya than Hudson and Conner did. And now they're dating. Yeah. I saw that because I was confused why they were making out at the hockey game. And I was like, what are they doing promo for? They won the freaking contest. And then I realized it was not them. And now they're dating and they look more like Shane and Ilya than Shane and Ilya do. It's incredible. And I wish them nothing but an entire lifetime of success and happiness. I heard it's for, I heard it's just for like fun. Like, I don't think they're actually dating. Yes, they are. I don't think they are. Yes, they are. Because they weren't dating before the thing. No, they weren't. This is how they met. Wow. That's, look at them. Is that not insane? I can't, can we make them, computer, can we make them bigger? No, it is really like crazy. I think they are dating. There's been interviews with them. I know. I'm sure it would be very fun to pop off like this and then be invited and put on the jumbo. You can't fake this shit like this. You just can't. I don't know. No. They are the moment. That's crazy. Did you see what? I said that's crazy. No, I know. It's kind of like Uncanny Valley. Yeah. Nice. Thanks. I can't believe you didn't go to Coachella. Everyone went to Coachella. I had BookCon. What? I had BookCon. The Coachella book. No, I know. It's weird because everyone was there. Oh, we didn't even talk about Coachella. This has been a harder episode because I'm trying not to talk about stuff we've already talked about and we recorded because we technically did that the three shows that were also shooting the shit and then we recorded as well. Then we took last week, we just didn't do an episode. So I'm confused what we did or didn't do. We didn't talk about Coachella because it didn't happen. What do you mean? We've been seeing each other since Coachella happened. The, oh, either Coachella's. Yes. Oh, that's really crazy. I think. No. No, that's wrong. No, it's right. We left each other on Saturday. So we left each other before Dustin Bieber's first performance. Yeah. Which I loved. I can't watch a lot of it because it's making me upset that I wasn't there. But I would have killed to be there. I love Justin. A lot of people don't know that. I'm a huge believer. Yeah, I'm a huge, huge Justin Bieber fan. I've been a Justin Bieber fan. You can scroll way back in my TikTok. I have posted Justin Bieber songs over and over and over again for 2020. Like when I downloaded TikTok. I'm not a fan of this. Like I get that like these catalog things. What do you mean you're not a fan of this? I wasn't a fan of playing YouTube. Like I'm sorry. Like I'm not. I know that it was like performance art and whatever, but like I'm, I'm sorry. Like, and I know that people are going to be mad at me. I'm a fan of him. Okay. I think this like this, I don't know. These things to like like Sabrina Carpenter goes out there and puts on a show and it's like, she's a show girl. I know, but like there's something about people. Okay. And I'm not saying that Justin Bieber for this, but like, I think this thing where celebrities are like, you know, like he played the YouTube videos because he just sold his catalog and that was an out for him. He didn't, he wasn't technically performing the song. So like he could still profit off of his performance and not split the revenue with the people that bought his catalog of music. What? So like that was a loophole around him having to pay the labels for performing those songs. He sang with them. But he wasn't like, I don't know. There was some loophole there about like playing the videos, whatever. And then he, the songs that he owns swag. That's why he did so many of those. Are you sure? I'm 90. Okay. My whole thing and again, I would call it he did performing. He sang with the YouTube songs. Well, maybe it wasn't just like all of them. I don't know. He sang with all of them. Is he, can we double check? That's not true. He didn't need a loophole to perform his old Coachella. Okay. Well, I lied then. Sorry. That's fine to do. I'm just, I like what I do on this, on this podcast is spread misinformation, then we double check and I'm always wrong. That's okay. That's fine. Because maybe someone else thought that. And now, because that's not true, I have more ground to stand on that. I think if you're being paid $10 million, give the people a show. Sorry. I think it's a little bit like, I haven't heard anything negative from anybody that was at Coachella. Okay. Everybody who was there was like, this was the best thing that's ever happened to me. I think we have different people on our feed. You had people at Coachella that didn't like it? Yeah. And I also think he really amped it up for Weekend 2. Yeah. I was going to say, if I was at Weekend 1 versus Weekend 2, I'd be upset. Yeah. But. Because CZA coming on and then Billy Eilish coming on. That was cool. But that's all I'll say. I would have wanted more of a, I would have wanted more of like a Sabrina Carpenter. That's just not Justin. I know. I know. But 10, just like when people get paid all this money and I know that that's the stature that they're in and all, this is what they deserve. Like I just want more, you know, like, and I'm not one to like give grace to people because they are a massive celebrity and like it's like nostalgic for people to like go see them on there. I know people had fun. Whatever. I'm sorry. I like. It's fine. A lot of people feel that way too. I just don't. I know. I think that it could be because you like grew up as a believer and a fan of like, you know what I mean? I didn't, I did, but I wasn't like, no, I wasn't, I didn't feel the same way about Justin that I did about One Direction. Like I loved Justin, but I didn't have any posters. I was just like more of a casual Justin fan. But I did grow up with him. Yeah, I don't know. But I don't know. I feel like you're paying for the name and for him to perform at Coachella. And he did. He's just, he's not a showboy. I know. I know. I would just want more. That's fine. It's fine to want. I know. The flesh desires what the flesh desires. No. Your flesh wanted more? My flesh wanted more from him. That's fair. That's the way I talk now after reading Stoner. I get that. We've got to find you your bridge book. No, full blown if I wouldn't have started Dungeon Crawl, Carl. Like, it's, which is by the way impossible to say every time I say it, like I skip like three, three vowels. Well, actually the first one is Dungeon Crawler, Carl. Do you know the names of the other one? You can't say it either. What? What? What? You can't say it either. Dungeon Crawler, Carl. Oh, no, you can. But listen to the names of the other ones in the series. You ready? Yeah. First is Dungeon Crawler, Carl. Then two, Carl's doomsday scenario. That's fine. Then three, the Dungeon Anarchist Cookbook. Okay. Four is the Gate of the Feral Gods. Five, I love, which is the Butcher's Masquerade. Six is the Eye of the Bedlam Bride. I don't like these. I guess you didn't. Why did I do this? Seven is the Inevitable Ruin. And eight is a Parade of Horribles. What did I get myself into? Eight books? It could be amazing. I don't know, man. It sounds like something Inferno. What's it called? Dante's Inferno. Dante's Inferno. I think it's very different. It's like levels to this shit. It was a video game. Dante's Inferno was Levels of Hell. Right. How many? Seven? Seven. This is eight. Oh, I don't think this is based off of the Levels of Hell. I'm going to double check because it is like demons and gargoyles and stuff. And Princess Donut. I know. I know that Princess Donut isn't like biblically accurate for Dante's Inferno. Dante's Inferno. Dungeon. Crawler. Carl. This reddit thread. So is Dungeon Crawler Carl somewhat inspired by a weird commentary on Dungeon's Dante's Inferno? So is Dungeon Crawler Carl somewhat inspired or a weird commentary on Dante's Inferno? Answer? I don't know. Duran Trojan Inferno. Features an 18-level post-apocalyptic dungeon that draws inspiration from Dante's Inferno. I feel like maybe you just try Hell instead of Dante's Inferno. It's saying it. Dante's Inferno. No, but I tried googling like is Dungeon Crawler Carl based off of Hell. I did. The structure like Dante's Journey, Carl and Donut descend through increasingly dangerous levels, levels of Hell, Princesses rather than traversing a flat landscape with Mordecai acting like a virtual light guide. Who's Mordecai? Who the rat man? It's really reminding me of Gregor the Overlander. Did you read those? No. Those were so good Connor. That was like a cartoon book right? No, it was Suzanne Collins books before Hunger Games. Oh my god, I've like chosen something at the cover. I did for a second. Wow. Maybe you could read the new Hunger Games book. Did you see, oh yeah I could. Did you see they just, they, wait, hey. Hi. They were selling Aragon in the front of Barnes and Noble when I went. Really? Yeah, how crazy is that? Did you read Aragon? You read Aragon, right? Yeah. I never read Aragon. And I really like the movies. There's no Aragon movies, is there? There's no Aragon movies, which is kind of crazy unless there are. It totally is. There are. Appreciate it. And it was good. Who is the, who plays the guy? Who's that boy? Oh, Ed Splearers? Ed Splearers? I don't know him. He looks like Taryn Edgerton. He totally does. And then this just reminded me too, because this just came out over the weekend, and this was supposed to be why I was going to put this in with the Colleen Hoover thing. They just announced the new Meet the Fockers. I can't wait. And it's them and Ariana Grande. And I do. This gets a pass from me, because I do think Ariana Grande is extremely funny, and she's obviously a good actress, but she's funny. Like, I always forget that about her. But it does pull me out a little bit. And Meet the Fockers is so one of my favorites. Brilliant. I love Ben Stiller so much. He was my first age in appropriate crush. Ben Stiller? Yeah. How old were you when you had a crush on Ben? Like 12. And he was older, like 40s, 50s? I don't know. Wait, you know what's crazy? What? Did you watch Full House? Yeah, of course. Did you know that if they filmed it today, Uncle Jesse would have been born in 2003? What do you mean? Uncle Jesse was 23 in that show. No. So he would have been born in 2003. Uncle Jesse was 23. Yeah. Yeah. Tough not to swallow. That's making me sick. Yeah. What's stressing me out now is, you know how there's all those TikToks? It's like, don't stress, you're only in season one of Friends. No, you're not. No, I'm saying like, that's, those used to comfort me. And now it's like, no, I'm like season eight now. Baby, I'm moving out of the city. Baby, like what happens once I'm past season 10? Guess what, baby? What, baby? You're on the first season of Grey's Anatomy. That's true, baby. And then everyone dies in that show. Yep. Everyone dies everywhere, all the time. Nice. Let's call it that a wrap and, and the podcast for today. Can I give myself a pat on the back that I did not bring up anything doom and gloom today? Oh my God, pat yourself on the back. No war. I didn't talk about UFOs at all. Thank you. Thank you. It's really hard because I have, I went into a comment spiral recently as in I was reading them, which I am really good at not doing, but slept recently. And we can't win because sometimes it's like, we need, I need Connor to stop talking about this. This is not why I watch the podcast. And sometimes it's Brooke really needs to let Connor talk about this. Like he's so politically aware, woke King and she's really like damping, putting a damper on him, him being a woke King. And it's like, you can't win. Here's what I'm saying. We can't win. And so we just truly have to do what feels good. And so if you want to talk about doom and gloom, then you can. That's what I'm saying. Well, only talk about it if it comes across my desk and I'm really worried about something. Yeah. But guess what? I'm also going to put a funny light spin on it. So if that is that, if that's upsetting, I do encourage you to press forward by 30 seconds. Okay. It is everyone's right to not like a bit of what we do. That's totally okay. That's so true, Connor. Yeah. And thank you guys for watching that note. We'll see you later. By the way, negative feedback is not welcome or constructive criticism. Never welcome. So we'll see you next week. Unless you're watching the bonus and we'll see you in right now. See ya. See ya. Bye.