RE-RELEASE - Garrett Morris

Garrett Morris Dana is first season SNL standout you might not remember him because you're just a young pup but Garrett Morris was I was very excited to have Garrett on because to have his perspective of being in that whirlwind of the first season yeah that first five years is sort of the story of SNL. He was, he just came to play. He was full of energy and fun. Laughing. And I don't know if it's okay to say, so it's like that or whatever. So I think he might have smoked marijuana for a bit. Mary Jean. But he was really, really funny and full of a lot of energy. Yeah, happy to be there, like talking, and those are the best guests because they come ready to play and they just want to screw around. And we did learn a lot, but we also... Learned a lot about his... That's all we want to do. Him and Chevy did some things together. Chevy wrote for him, and he did the interpretive guy. I was yelling. Oh, yeah. I remember that from the 70s. The hearing-impaired newscaster, yeah. But it's a really fun interview with Garrett. I would listen to this one. Here he is, Garrett Morris. Garrett, my last name is Spade. You've already screwed it up by having an ex-convict on your show, okay? Whoa, let's get down to it. Yeah. Did you serve time? That's all. It's my only question. I'm not lying. I'm not lying. I actually spent a year and a half at what is known as Greg Meadows Correctional Facilities. I was a teacher. Oh, I was at the Tim Meadows Correctional Facility. Now, Garrett, you were a teacher in there? You too. Go ahead. Go ahead, Garrett. Let's hear about that. Anyway, in like 1968, 69, I was a school teacher. I taught at PS71 over on the east side. And I also taught, they had a program for teaching convicts. And I was a part of it. They gave us a Volkswagen, right? You guys say it's really Volkswagen. Yeah, everyone's saying it wrong. Anyway, and I didn't know I was driving along the drug thing, and I used to get called all the time by the cops. Okay. Wait, you were running drugs in the Volkswagen, and then you got pulled over? And you were also teaching kids and running drugs? I was teaching those murderers drama. Oh, okay. Yes. You have quite a resume. I looked it up. it's it's it's vast you know Garrett I have to tell Garrett something just so we are we have some common ground here uh Garrett I was in Arizona you know running the harsh streets of Scottsdale and when I was about you know 18 19 I was trying to flirt with this girl leaving a SAE party at Arizona State and I got pulled over immediately and they cuffed me and said you have to go to jail I don't think Dana, I didn't tell you this. So I go, I go to jail and I say, Hey, any reason for the jail? You know, uh, I, I didn't even ask, uh, cause I just felt I'm pretty guilty about a lot of things. And they said, yeah, you've gotten too many tickets, speeding tickets, and we have a warrant for your arrest. And I realized they didn't. So a couple hours in, I go, can I see those? And they showed me copies and it was my brother's signature saying he was me because he got pulled over so much. He would have had to go into jail. He goes, no, no, I don't have my license. I'm David. And so then he signed them all, and then he still didn't pay him. And then I spent the night in the clink, and I had to have another comedian come bail me out. Oh, wow. Chevy Chase bailed you out? Do you still speak with my brother? I still speak with my brother, unfortunately, but he knows I'm such a pussy, I would never really give him any trouble about it, and I didn't. Is he out of jail? No, I was the one out. He never went. I had to do the time for him. I had three older brothers that would stuff pant, uh, stolen items down my pants. Cause I was nine and they were 11, 12, 13. And they were all juvenile delinquents. We fought, we smoked, we stole, but they would stuff them down my pants. Cause I looked so little and so innocent and I'd walk out. But yeah, I stole a lot of stuff when I was nine. I'm just putting it out there right now. I would, I stole 10 yo-yos in one day. I had three weekends in the tank myself. Okay. See, we're all not soft. We're all from the fucking streets. Let's get that out of the way. Yeah, got it. You know what I'm saying? I'm not innocent at all. But one time it was because a traffic cop broke the law and used a Slim Jim right to go into my car. And he looked under the mat in the front seat and found a bag of marijuana, which is illegal cop. OK, yeah. Anyway, I go to the impound to get my car and I see about four or five cops standing around my car. I'm not stupid. So I wait. Right. And they wait. About 30 minutes. OK, let's get my car. So I go to the car and I don't go in and they come and they say, open this back door. I say, no, I'm not opening. Oh, my God. They open it. Right. And then I was doing my karate thing. So I had a gi in the back. And they said, open that bag. I said, no, sir. They opened it and they had put the grass in the bag. Oh, my God. The old frame. Yeah, they handcuffed me. But anyway, I go downtown and I'm being booked. And sure enough, there was a cop there who was here. He says to me, see John Yanusti. Now way back there, John Anussi was a very progressive Italian lawyer who was hooked up, right? He was helping out. Sure enough, I went over there. John Anussi figured out what it was about. He said, just see me Monday. I'll come in Monday. John whispers something in the judge's ear. And the judge says, Garrett Morris. I raised my hand. He said, get out of here. I didn't want to see you in here again. All right. He whispered you were framed, right? That's crazy. Well, the lawyer probably told him how the cop got the gray. Yeah. No body cams back then. How you been doing, man? How you been doing? I'm doing good. Me and Dana have been having fun. Look at my hair looks good today. You know what? I know what happened. I filmed something this week. Usually a little shaky. Are you and Dana an item? Oh, an item? An item? I just like the expression. Are you breaking a story? Listen, Garrett, what happens on Fly on the Wall stays on Fly on the Wall. Am I canceled now? That can't do it anymore. I'm leading the cancel. Yeah, Dana and I are old buddies, and we sort of emerge in the same person over time. I must say, you do look like you're from the same moment. You do. Yeah. Same tribe. Irish, Scottish, Norwegian. What's your tribe? German. I'm Irish, Scottish, Norwegian. Yeah. Well, I'm from Cambodian, Nigerian, West Africa. And by the way, Ancestryback.com says I have a little bit of finish in me. Can you believe that? That's interesting. It's down deep. I can't see. My skin cries when it's sunny. By the way, tomorrow's my birthday. Tomorrow's your birthday. I read that your birthday's coming up. Is it the first? Is that what it is? Tomorrow's February 1st, yes. Okay, we'll delete this because this is going to be airing in 2027. uh no we don't we don't know one no we're gonna all right what's your secret i have to ask what are you what are you drinking this here is green tea okay that's it that's the actually glucose tea helps to reduce your glucose um count so blood sugar stuff yeah yeah i i have a type 2 diabetes your energy uh doesn't match your birth certificate it's huge i mean you're just like On fire. You're just energetic. I can't tell you on here, man. This is recorded by cops. Okay. Yeah. They're always monitoring this. I will say Garrett, you are, um, you have sort of a, uh, very bright light and energy about you and a fun thing about you. And I see why in comedy you do well, cause you always bring it. You're very vocal. You got a strong voice. you just have a fun vibe and i think that's positive so yeah positive people want to work with you so when it comes to comedy this is what i say i'm an actor who was in a comedy show many many years ago and i have been suffering ever since now why have you been suffering so are we everywhere i go people want me to be funny and as my ex-wife tells you well she's telling me all the time. In word, you ain't funny. Fill in the blanks. I got it. Yeah. Well, I think you're funny. And, you know, a lot of people have a funny vibe about them. Like people say when I date girls, I go, what do you look for? And I go, I like a girl that's funny, but I don't mean she needs to be Robin Williams. Some girls just have like a charm and fun thing about them. And that's funny to me. And it's a lightness and fun. They don't have to be like, you know, Henny Youngman. yada da. So I like that. I go, I'll take care of that part. Take my life. Exactly. Yes. But by the way, Dana, Garrett has worked with Pryor and all these huge, huge stars, which I look over and I can't believe how cool it is. I got to work with Richard Pryor, but I want to hear your story first. Don't one up him yet. I have a nice Richard story. I have a great Richard Pryor story. Okay. I want to hear yours. It's got to be better. When Richard and I were cult fiends, that's the title of the podcast. I bet Dana's story doesn't start like that. Right. But Richard brought his own group because he had heard that I was Lauren nobody had heard about me except people on the East Coast. So Richard brought his own writers. Nobody knew. I got this job with just 15 and 75 was a pretty good job for a black guy to get. They're thinking I'm Lauren help me. Lorne Michaels. Lorne Michaels. Lorne Michaels inward. Can I say it? Like you were his main man. You can say anything you want as far as I'm concerned. I basically thought that was going on. Richard had gotten, that Lorne had gotten some guys. Well, at the time, I got to Saturday Night Live. I'd already been in New York for like 17 years. I had written two plays. two plays yeah i read that i've been at like 15 off broadway and broadway shows uh and so i paid my dues right and they didn't know that so when richard came he brought his own group and he didn't use me and i was really hurt by that because until this day richard is my favorite monologuist of all time right yeah and at that time i was really very hurt because i wanted to went with him so he did the show didn't use me but later on when i went to california he was doing a movie called critical condition and i got a call from my agent saying richard pryer wants you to be in the show be in the movie and he doesn't say anything i assume that was his way of saying hey you know i'm sorry or something like i like you yeah yeah that was that was very sweet, sensitive. Well, you know, a lot of hosts do that. I mean, a lot of hosts still bring in writers just because they get scared. Like, maybe Paul Mooney was with Richard. I don't know who he was with. He was a force of nature. Paul Mooney, I used to do stand-up with him in the late 70s and I would go, why is this guy in this little club? I mean, he was so charismatic and so good-looking and so funny. It was like just everything. I love Paul Mooney. I'm sure he was behind Richard doing what he did because he was Richard's writer. But to this day, I see because much of what Richard did was Paul Mooney. Right. OK. What do you think? You know, when the idea of a monologist, you know, I think of that more voice orientated. But I think that with Richard, from what when I first saw him on the Ed Sullivan show, he mimed for two minutes, a guy reaching under his underarm to see if he had B.O. And it was like just a silent movie. You know, so Richard had that capacity to paint a picture instantly and he could do just a straight monologue. So I don't know. He could tell stories. Yeah. And play all the characters. Yeah. When you're talking about Mudbone, you wouldn't be laughing for like two or three minutes until he got to the punchline. Yeah. But you were so engaged in Mudbone till this day again. How did you say the word? I said monologous. You say it again. Monologist. Monologist. Anyway, sometimes I have trouble with English. I knew what you meant. I want to tell my Richard Friart little story here. Go ahead. Tell me. Tell me. So I working at the Hollywood Inn as a waiter Yeah And it was near the Circle Star Theater up near San Francisco Richard headlining there So Richard in the restaurant So I got to go serve Richard And I was really nervous. So I brought him a Denver omelet. Okay. And then later on, I came back and I took the plate. And he looked up at me and said, quote, Whoever made that omelet can suck my dick. and i never knew if it was a positive or negative review 12 years later i'm in a movie with richard prior which i'll tell you about we're at lunch and i just wanted to know what he meant that day but i didn't want to bring it up he probably wouldn't remember so i look at him i take a bite of my cheeseburger and i said this cheese uh this uh this cheeseburger is really really really uh good and he goes, wow, you must want to suck somebody's dick. No, I can't. I got the headline. He got it wrong. He uses that suck dick metaphor a lot. Okay, so it wasn't just me. One of the funniest jokes I ever heard was when he said, this bitch was so fine, I want to suck her daddy's dick. I like that one, yeah. I just want to say I just had a root canal and a crown put in and I'm kind of spaced out. So the end of the joke went like this, you know. OK, do it again. He goes. I like, wait a minute. I'm so I'm so stoned from the dentist. The punchline. The punchline. You do it. Oh, I said. No, I can't. I really can't remember. I think you said this cheeseburger can suck my dick. No, it was. Yeah, it was a reverse that I got the. the information by setting a trap, you know? Oh, I see. And I will get to it before this podcast is over, but I am so high right now. I mean, I'm just like, I'm very spacey. What kind of marijuana? Marijuana? No, it was dental stuff. Oh, okay, okay. But if I do smoke marijuana, my brand is Sledgehammer. That's my brand of cannabis. Oh, thank God. Your brand of cannabis is what? Sledgehammer. Sledgehammer. From the Peter Gabriel collection? I made it up. Yeah, I like that name. It sounds cool. Shovel to the face. I will be smoking a joint, okay? Hey, Garrett, I have a question for you. You can smoke a joint right now while I ask you if you want. Now, Garrett, when you- Okay, bring me a joint. Oh, boy. So when you come on SNL, it must be like the Dirty Dozen. So you guys all get together. you probably don't know each other, right? Right. And then you are thrown together and you're sort of like, okay, let's see what works, what doesn't work. And you were a writer. You were a writer at the beginning, right? Yes, I was, yes. Okay, so you were not, I don't think you were on camera until later, I think that was a decision that was made later, correct? I actually was on camera the first show. Oh shit. Let me tell you, can I? Yeah. You're in the middle of a story, I don't want to cut you off. No way, it's about you. I was a playwright, right? So I brought on my play. He read it and liked it because there's a couple of funny things in it. He hired me. I didn't know that just because you write a play that's about two hours doesn't mean you can write 30 seconds. Yeah, a little tiny sketch. Yeah, for sure. It took me about four or five months to realize I couldn't do it. and I was really pissed off myself to finally I realized I had an idea because in my play the Black Panther group that I have is called the Young Lions makes a joke about how when they're collecting money at fundraising they want to raise a lot of money when they have white guilty white liberals in the audience I love them right so I happened to tell that idea I'm going to call his name to Schiller Tom Schiller Schiller goes over to the studio and tells it to another guy whose name I will not call that guy then writes it down as his idea whoa wait a minute right when I come over it's written down and he's not even giving me credit for even contributing right so anyway anyway what happened now i don't know what am i tell i'll tell you the whole story anyway yeah anyway what happened was it became a thing called a white guilt relief fund yes i remember the sketch right yeah and i don't know i when i started off to help me because i'm 85 i may be on i'm tracking the story white people for donations out of guilt and make them an honorary Negro, you'd send them a plaque. Anyway, that was the only thing that I did that I thought was worthwhile. And this guy who at that time was a second in command to end beats. Right. Now, here's what happened was my whole mad. I was so angry about that. Yeah. A couple of weeks to stew over that. And I was going to make a serious mistake. I'm going to come in this particular day and let him know what's for. And even if it meant physically confronting him, I was going to do that. Although I knew he was a wrestling champ. Now you're talking about wrestling camp from Harvard. I think I know who it is. I didn't care. I said, if I'll get a couple of licks in. Yeah. After he whips my ass, he's still going to remember me. Right. So I get off to the elevator and somebody's there says, Garrett, Lorne wants to see you in the green room. I go to the green room and sure enough, John and Gilda and Jane had told Lorne Michaels, look, you've got Garrett bringing in black actors. He's one himself. And here's a movie he's done. They were looking at Cooley High. Cooley High. Right. So Long looked at Cooley High. He auditioned me with Gilda and I was totally counterpunched because Gilda is like, Gilda was to this day. Unreal. how she improvised you didn't even know she's doing it right and i kind of punched throughout that it was i said it was i was a taxi driver driving from gfk with her as my my uh passenger and i was cheating the hell out of her all the way right and so anyway that's how i became a member of the group so i was there the first the first time we did it from the beginning but i didn't start off that way no wow but how about you turn your anger and you had to switch gears and i look i i look i'm a buddhist so i don't believe in necessarily in a personal god but somebody really was in the works who stopped that because i was gonna make a serious serious mistake listen franken's franken's got some ground game too i have go-to moves garrett i mean how as a fighter would you do the kind of hey let's be friends and then headbutt or would you work the body or what would be your kind of go-to moves? I would have gone to the social factors first because that would have brought him down. Then I would have kicked him in the chin. He's going to get up mad as hell and do some kind of a hold and break my neck, okay? But look, if you're short like I am and don't weigh much, you got to go for what you know. Yeah, you got to get away. You hit fast and then you move, but be scrappy. Just take 10 to get one in. There was no way I could have won that fight. Yeah. I know the dude and he would, he's very tough when he gets in the ground game. I would say, I, listen, I got mad at him too, but I didn't, I didn't think of fighting him. Decision. Hey, before we go on, can I just do the Richard Pryor joke? We can cut it out, but it really bugged me. All right. I'm so sorry about the dentist, but here it is. I waited. I'll set it up real fast. When Gabe Richard Pryor, Denver Omelette is the holiday inn. I brought, got the plate up and he said, whoever made that omelet can suck my dick. 12 years later, true story, in a movie, wanted to know what he meant by suck my dick. Was it positive or negative? I'm having lunch with him. I take a bite of the cheeseburger. I look at Richard and I say, well, whoever made this cheeseburger can suck my dick. And Richard said, you must love that cheeseburger. That's how you do it. Boom. Dana. I'm making Garrett happy. That's what I love. I never knew I would say suck my dick on this podcast. Now I've said it seven times. That's a mic drop. What do you have? If you have. A potato with a penis. Excuse me, a patinas. That's it. Yeah. You have a dictator, stupid. Why do you have to have the stupid part? Yeah, stupid. It's just it's a pretty good joke. No, because you didn't know what it was, stupid. stupid i like the stupid at the end was hilarious that could have been a guy character so so you're part of that original lexicon i mean uh who is your hangout friend of the cast these are just basic snl questions so who'd you gravitate to was it gilda or just everybody or did you have people you know jane uh and chevy um but i didn't do what i should have done because i should have also after the show after the show at the first couple of years they would you go downstown to this bar i think uh willie oh yeah you have the party yeah that's equal to that golf game yeah people talk about where you form alliances right so i didn't do that so i really had a lot of people not liking me thinking i was stuck up and all that well yeah why didn't you go i'm one now i want to know because i even to this day am an introvert working against that all right I've really gotten over it to a large extent. But also I had at that time, okay, do you want to know the real truth? I had probably a couple of girls at home waiting for some cocaine to do what we're going to do. So it was either the girls and the cocaine or having Lauren tell his story about how we met her. I think it may happen. Well, listen, that's a tough one, Dana, because his story sounds great, like all that fun stuff. But then you look back and you realize you've got such huge, talented, cool people that you get to. Because I was going to say, Garrett, did you have an official after party? It sounds like you didn't. But we had Dana was on and then I was on with him for a while. And we had they would walk around with a ticket, a secret, you know, during the show. Remember this, Dana? And they'd hand you it and you put it in your wardrobe or something. You go, here's where the party is. Don't tell anyone. And it was during the live show. So you go, OK. And then after the show, you'd go straight there, but they didn't want everyone to find out about it. And so we'd have a designated spot every Saturday and we'd go there. Sort of the same thing. You just go there and get all fucked up with everybody. But you see, I'm sure that the reason why that didn't happen to me, because at first I set up not going in the first place. Right. So when that started happening, people probably said, well, you know, fuck him, you know, he doesn't. Well, you had some responsibilities to get back to. But I remember when I first got on SNL, Lauren was telling me about, you know, Chevy and Danny and everybody. And Garrett, you said, Garrett, the only way to do that again, Danny and, you know, Eddie and all the people, Paul, you know, you could never get Garrett to the party unless you brought some cocaine and some hookers. I go, really? Right. I'm sure. Right. I'm sure that they were going to say that. It's good bait. Well, the thing about it was coming in 86, You guys were badasses Like to me that original cast You guys were A little bit of A little power flower Oh you're going to blow your nose A little Gentleman joins us Been on Saturday Night Live From the original cast A young man named Garrett Morris But we thought of you guys as badass pirates You would fight There were drugs Chevy and Bill Murray would fight and Belushi was like a badass. And then we got in and people were having like Ampstel lights. We'd have a Bud Light at the party with me and Phil and just look around. And we didn't party as hard. We felt we didn't belong. Well, can I say something about John? Yeah. Mm-hmm. John, when he and I were both into the cocaine thing, he never really talked to me unless he needed cocaine. Mm-hmm. And I get a knock on the door. Hey, buddy. come in and i put my you know 10th floor down there you know what he would do do 10 of them by the time he got to i had none left so he would just go in get a straw on his nose go down on the desk you were about to start the coke and he would snort all of it oh my god he would leave a little bit oh god a little bit at the end god oh nice guy a brilliantly He a challenging man but boy boy I had mineral water and Nora Dunn would come in and just chug it Oh I kidding No But what was it about like I tried cocaine I've talked about it. I just, like you're saying you're fighting being introverted. Like, when I did cocaine, within 30 seconds, I was very sad. I just. Really? It made me very anxious and very paranoid. I only tried it twice. and I one time I did some cocaine, drove to the comedy club and I couldn't go in the club because I knew they all hated me in there. And I just drove back home. So how did it? But I knew people that cocaine spoke to them, that eventually they had it in a little thing and they just sniff it all day. Yeah. So what did it do to you? I mean, cocaine did the opposite to me. It livened me up. Yeah. Oh, because you were an introvert. So it kind of opened you up. But then you need more cocaine, right? You're losing the high. You got to get more, right? That's the trouble. That's the trouble because the thing that first high, you never get it again. Then I get it again. David. After that, you're striving to get that first high. So even if you're on for like 35 years, which I was 35 years. Yeah. You never get that again. Then you start smoking it. Right. and you get that thing again. Then smoking it, you're coming down. You keep coming down. You never get that first tire again. Doesn't make you stop chasing it. I was there. I did it for a while. Well, Lynn Byers is one. Do you remember Lynn Byers? Oh, yeah. What a mess. When that happened to him, I started thinking, Garrett, you're way older than this guy. You're way older. And, you know, something's going, you know, you're lucky that that didn't happen to you. You know, Garrett, I was in it during Len Bias. Len Bias, for the listeners, is a basketball player that got recruited by the Celtics, I think. And I think he died after draft night or something from doing too much cocaine. Something, I think, before he played. And that was the first time I think I knew you could die from just doing straight cocaine. Like, I hadn't heard that. Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me. Oh, he dropped his joint. His house is on fire. No, he's actually. Oh, is it okay to say that we think our friend Garrett Morris is enjoying some fine cannabis. Sativa. Sativa. Sativa. Oh, so that's like, what does that do? It evens your energy out or what? One is mellow. Sativa is a kind of marijuana that lets you stay awake. Oh, it's upper. Okay. Yeah. It's an upper. If you get a hybrid, it's in between. If you get indica, you're going to go to sleep. So a lot of times when I'm working, I'll either do it. Is that weird? Just outfoking or with this, you know. Well, I worked with Scatman Carruthers once in Rockefeller Center. I envy you, okay? Oh, I got to say that. I'm a Scatman. Angel from heaven, sweetest guy. Oh, wow. And always was, you'd go in the bathroom and you'd hear him and he'd be smoking weed, you know. And so one night, it was the one year anniversary of John Lennon's death. And my brother was visiting the show. It was a sitcom with Mickey Rooney, another crazy man. and scat man gave us a joint he rolled it in front of us and he had both ends were closed off he did it without even looking you know and so then we tried it and it was terrible it was really weak so the next break i brought back some colombian pot from santa cruz purple i did and the next day in the elevator now scat man was from the 30s when it was illicit he in the elevator people around he says to me quote the music was good might i get a pound of your weed so after the show was over my brother and i got a huge bag of pot grocery bag of pot drove it down to van eyes where scatman live brought him the pot played banjo kept in touch with him no his guitar yeah ukulele still going strong and many the moochie never met like a a character like scatman you know You see that man there He points to the janitor He goes, that man's an artist That man is an artist He was just taking us all these different places I like that He was in Blues Brothers Dana And that's the only reason I knew who he was I think he was in Blues Brothers He sang Minnie the Moocher Is that what I'm thinking? I know Rita was in it, right? He was in The Shining Oh yeah, that was him too With Jack Nicholson You know what? I've never seen that. It's scary. I love my man, but I hate... Scary movies. Yeah, I hate scary movies. Yeah, so do I, dude. I'm with you. Well, you said that Jack brought in a suitcase of pot into London. By pot you mean cocaine? No, this was cannabis. And Jack goes, I'm not going to sell it. It's just for my personal use. And they let him through. Really? Yeah. because he's a monster uh shoot i i have another thing did you have any favorite sketches back then garrett when you were there that first year uh the uh colossal uh president what was that colossal president yeah there was this uh thing at the 12 mile island or something like that where the uh nuclear thing oh four mile three mile three mile three mile i know Yeah, 5k. Yeah, everybody's big. And I'm the wife of the president. And he's big and I'm big, you know, another one that was my favorite not for any other reason. But I really think about it as a win which somebody didn't get the message. It was with a OJ Simpson. Oh, well, he was a Mandingo who goes around, raping all the black slaves, female slaves. And then I suppose the kid was supposed to kiss. I don't want to kiss him. They did a sketch time is to kiss, you know, like this to kiss him. And he backs away as if I really want. Yeah, you were just acting right. Yeah, man. Another one is something that Alan Swybel did. The baseball team. Very, very good to go. Chico baseball. Been very, very good for me. Yeah, actually, Chico Escuela is really Brian Dole Murray's original concept. He's funny. His brother came up with. Then Alan enlarged on it. Right. So we would do a piece like that all the time. And also, I can't throw out something that Chevy came up with for me, which is Hard of Hearing. Yeah, which became kind of a runner. Everyone knows that. That's a great runner, are you sure? Yeah. And Zweibel's a big writer there. Yeah, he was good, right? Oh, I love him. I love Zweibel. Yeah, he's great. But Garrett, now, when you did in the beginning, oh, first of all, now that one, I don't know when Pryor hosted or what year it was when they did that sketch with Chevy. I think it must have been the first year. Wasn't Chevy only one year? Yep. No, Chevy came in after a year and a half. Oh, no, I thought he left. I'm sorry. No, Chevy was in after, you're right. He was in like a year, right. And then Bill Murray came in. Right. And Chevy blew up. What was that like when one cast member was like, wasn't he on the cover of Time or something? I mean, it just went pew. Was he on the cover of Time? I didn't know that. Or Newsweek. I mean, I know that Chevy just got so much. I said, right on. He did with Fletch. That was the name of Fletch. Yeah, he did a lot of movies. Yeah. I thought, however, he waited. He should have waited a little longer. Of course. I agree. He wishes he'd never left. He wishes he'd stayed at least five years. Right. Just like the guy who was on that cop show who later on did a CSI. David Caruso. Yeah, he left too soon. You know, that happens. And I get, I sort of get it, but Chevy was a tall, great looking guy. And he's a, and he was really good in comedy. And then he was a movie star. Like, I don't even know what that would be like, but to leave when, you know, it's the best show, it's a coolest show. Like you guys, I know Chevy blew up, but all you guys were huge. The Beatles. I mean, everyone on the show. Rebel. I mean, there's just, was nothing like it. I mean, I was in college and when it, when it came on and I saw all you guys. You make me feel old, fellas. Okay. When I was one. I feel old all the time. I was being born in the hospital and it was on TV and I was like this looks pretty funny I was born in 1988 but when I got into Saturday Night Live I had been in New York about 17 years and when I was asked to join Saturday Night Live all those other motherfuckers had just got out of high school and college. I was about 10 years away from AARP. You did not look older than anyone. You didn't stand out as like Phil Hartman, I think, was 38. I was 39 years old. Yeah. Now, Garrett, this, Dana, I just want to ask everyone might know this, but Chevy does, there's some sketches people remember, you know, and one of them is Chevy interviewing Richard Pryor when he was there for a job. And who wrote that? Huh? Who wrote that one? I think Chevy and Richard together. Oh, cool. Yeah, that's like, I mean, when you look back on what you guys did comedically. That's a classic. And then what you could, what we call it now, what we can get away with now. You know, it's just very different. At the time, even at the time it was incendiary, but now it would be like, go to a test pattern. Right. I mean, Lauren, he did at the right time because in about 10 years, we got into what we're into now. Right. Which is where. Which is a softening. Yeah. I mean, with all due respect to the brilliant cast that Saturday Night Live has always had, you can't really write for them the way they wrote for us then. I mean, you know, and I hate that. I hate that. It changed. It's a real, it's a Rubik's cube. You got to really, you really have to cleverly get clever stuff in because you can't, it's almost like you're pulling from the same eight jokes that everyone's allowed to use now. Right. And that won't make people mad. But you guys, I think the first five, I think you're on for five years that at least the standards and practices didn't even know what to say no to. They were like, this is so ridiculous. Like they had to learn and go, well, wait, wait, we don't like that. We're getting a lot of complaints about that. We have to stop that. but it was like playing whack-a-mole because every week you think of a new way to offend people and that was the greatest part of it well no no one cared initially and then the show became a smash at what point i mean two years in you guys just blew up but initially probably they didn't no one's watching we had a lot of people who were we thought were progressive okay love in my the true progressive yeah without any sign of racism whatsoever but i so he's like so he's like I thought, for instance, that Michael O'Donohue, because of his past, would be the same way. Michael O'Donohue, with all due respect, was an absolute racist motherfucker. You got to add motherfucker to that because it just completes the thought. The very first show, there was a skit that was going to have a black doctor, right? Have a doctor, not a black doctor. And I wasn't in it at all. So I said, hey, Michael, why don't we have the doctor be black? You know what he tells me? Well, Gary, the audience might be thrown by a black doctor. Now, this is 1975, right? I'm from New Orleans, where from the time I was 12 years old, I was surrounded not only by hordes of black medical doctors, but black PhDs as well. And I'm wondering how a guy whose name is associated with National Lampoon doesn't fucking know this. Did he not see Guess Who's Coming to Dinner with Sidney Poitier, which I saw in the theater at age eight. And it infected me the rest of my life. And I got to do a lot of benefits with Sidney Poitier. And he's another real gentleman. Sorry, I'm still a little high on slurring. Well, that's tough because, yeah, you're lighting the show. You say, hey, can I get thrown into a sketch? and he said, no, this one's not right for you. And it's like, oh boy. You can't be a black doctor. What are you talking about? You know, we're talking about 15.8. I remember being almost high. You walk by a person, just walk by and you, I'm on 72nd Street and he's coming towards me and I feel like a half a block away. I say, that's fucking 15.8, right? Ooh. And I just pass him like that. To this day, I remember that day, you know. Oh yeah. Yeah, he was so eloquent. I remember I did a bunch of benefits for Cedars-Sinai and he was always there. And then one time I got off stage and I was walking to the audience, he stopped me and I was able to do my. Yeah And he gave me some praise and I did my I said they call me Mr Tibbs And he laughed so hard It was Rod Steiger I think But yeah for me there were so many brilliant movies in the sixties and seventies. And just a lot of my heroes were black. I mean, just Jimi Hendrix, my brother came in 1966. He came home. He was 13. He said, I just saw the best guitar player in the world. I said, what's his name? He goes, Jimi Hendrix. But we didn't, we weren't, We were kind of progressive in our own way back then because we just wanted to see Jimmy. We didn't think, you know, and I went to the first integrated, a very, very well integrated high school with busing in 1969. So my Jimi Hendrix, you know what he did when he came back from England, where he'd always become famous. He got on the corner of 125th Street and 7th Avenue and played the guitar for like 18 hours or so. Just to introduce people to him. he was really something else he was no like neil young has said about no one's ever played the guitar like jimmy hendrix did jimmy hendrix was never he did he die before snl or he's somebody they would have he was one of those caught up in with you know yeah he died he was like 27 right 27 yeah um you know janice joplin around the same age too um kirk i hate it when she i hate it when that happened to Janice. I loved her ass, man. I mean, you know what I mean? Yeah. Well, again, you know, there's just certain talents, like Janice's singing, and there's a word I use a lot, supernatural. I mean, that screaming, the intensity of it was just crazy. With all due respect, especially coming out of a white woman. Okay? Sure. Yeah, she has such a talent, and then it almost like they burn out quickly because it's so much talent. And so that voice is so cool and everything. And you hope it's around forever, but yeah. Yeah. Well, it's also just the accidental playing with fire, you know, Jim Morrison, once you start playing with opioids and mixing that stuff in, uh, you know, of course, you know, John Belushi, you know, it's, it wasn't intentional, uh, but you're playing with fire. It's, it's just, yeah. Matter of fact, that's another thing that started me to straighten up. yeah john's death was john during when you were on snl when was it i can't he was 33 like 83 i think right it was after snl when he he died yeah the thing is john and i didn't really hang only when he needed cocaine did he yeah right yeah sure yes so what how did that affect you that that gets you off cocaine or you just started to slow down or what happened slow down and by the time I came here, I was, it's not something you could just stop. By 2005, I went to AA, Alcoholics Anonymous. And they do something that exacerbates you, they will call your ass, okay? And they will sponsor you over and over. And so through that, I really, I've succeeded in getting rid of it okay much different with cigarettes which i still am struggling with but uh i'm glad that it's 2005 it's been not that uh 2022 yeah here we are since that's what 17 years 16 yeah well the body has a remarkable healing apparatus once once you give it a break you know so you're did you have a lot of people who lived a long time in your family tree my grandfather lived in 92 okay so you got some longevity yeah my grandmother got i'm sure got cancer when she was in her 50s so that's my mother lived to 80 but uh she didn't take care of herself okay so there's a couple you know either i'm gonna hook up my grandfather and you know stay for a How do you deal with stress? Are you really Buddhist? Are you really Zen? Are you, are you relaxed in your brain all the time? I know you guys hear Buddhism and you think Zen, Zen is not, it's not, it's only one part of Buddhist. There are 300, over 200,000 Buddhists worldwide and kill them. Unlike me, they chant, which is not the same thing as the Zen Buddhists. Okay. Right. So you chant. They meditate. Don't they got to dominate. I got to dominate. I got to dominate. I got to know it's not your hearing. Are you got to fuck it up? You know, let me hear it. Now, you're hearing your numbering. You know, which means you're going to the mystic law of cause and effect, which means you don't believe in a personal God, but you do regard the law as being in the place that most other religious place. gone. It is the most sacred. Right. I did transcendental meditation and my mantra is Dominali. I'm I'm I'm a TM practitioner, too. Yeah. My mantra, Dominali, which I found out later was Native American for your shorts. We don't have much time. Are you telling people your mantra? I was kidding. I'm just joking. I would never tell you my mantra. I like. Yeah, don't tell him. My mantra is Garrett. Garrett, listen. Garrett, after SNL, first of all, there's too many cool people there. You had Danny Aykroyd, who we did. I did two movies with. Three, actually. Great guy. Beautiful guy, yes. He was a beautiful dude. I see him like. Did you hang with anyone after the following years of SNL? Did you stay in touch or did you see him when you see him kind of thing? Sort of, I saw him when I saw him. When Jane was out here doing Two Rock, Reese, Duck on the phone. oh that's right jane was on a second rock from the sun third rock from the sun right and now i have a quality relationship with lorraine because yeah lorraine hannah who is very very talented did you see her in hacks oh hacks yeah yeah yeah yeah she's a dynamite actor and yes so a very fine comedian she did my show uh last year yeah garrett you who was your head writer when Was it Ann Beetz? Ann Beetz was, yes. She was. See, they had a girl head writer back then, which is probably more rare than a black doctor. And that other guy we mentioned, that was the assistant head writer. I know who you're talking about. And look, I was very sorry about what happened to him because I think that I'm not going to call their names. They should have backed him up when that thing happened. They should have backed him up and not let him go the way he did. Was there a lot of politics? Oh, I know what you're talking about. A lot of politics. What he did was not, he didn't have to leave because of that. Yeah, I tend to agree. It was a purge that had to happen, but some people got swept up into it that maybe in a more reasonable time would have, yeah. Yeah, he's not been treated like that at all. Yeah, I agree. Yeah. Jeez, I wonder if I'm canceled right now. Do you think we could be canceled? You're canceled because you agreed. We said suck my dick I said Sidney Poitier black man First of all he says with all due respect to us And then he says with all due respect Motherfucker to other people I got called a white motherfucker From Karen Morris So I'm just happy the rest of the day Like my day is a home run now Do you have any kids? I've got two sons And they're in show business Oh Jesus Are you a fire motherfucker? Yeah, I guess so. I mean, he got you on a technicality, Dana. Motherfucker is just a great word because of the rhythm of it. Motherfucker. You know, it's a great word. I mean, gosh darn it. That's not, doesn't get it. In my community, gentlemen. You say it better. He's a bad motherfucker, meaning you, Dana, meaning a great guy. Yeah, I like that. I say of like, oh, Rachel Maddow. I say she's a bad bitch, right? rather than a motherfucker right you're a bad bitch you did oh I don't look at the news anymore because it depresses me no no no it's can it's too but it's designed to get us all angry when I was Rachel all the time and was the old lady oh joy read you know I read yeah you know I remember you know yeah Brian Yeah, so. Ron Williams. My thing until the news just started bringing me down. Here, before we let you go. Bust me out. Do you still sing? Dana said you're a good singer. I used to sing high seas. Now I sing low seas. I sing the blues now. I don't sing, you know. Oh, you're doing the Albert King. or who you're singing? Muddy Waters and stuff like that. Muddy Waters? Yeah. My favorite blues singer is Muddy Waters. Oh, I loved Albert King blues power. Albert King was great. Albert King was great. That baby, that baby in its baby bed all fussing up. He's got the blues. He's got the good old-fashioned country blues. Remember Albert? Wasn't he magic? And, of course, Muddy Waters. I mean, you know, that's another guy. Oh, you know, Morgan, yes. Lay it honest. Don't be shy. But you sang with the Harry Belafonte singers. I was with him for like nine years. My first job in the business was as a singer-arranger. Yeah, that's amazing. The Belafonte singers. The Belafonte singers. Yeah, there's a 12-member group that he managed, right? He sang with them periodically, but they used to sang without him. Who sang that thing, you put the lime in the coconut, not your bottle. That was Harry. Okay. That was Harry Belafonte. Yeah. And then it became a commercial too. Yeah. Some product. What about seven? Now you can, you can get laid with that. 85. That's all day. 85. Still alive. 87. You got a cool voice. 87. You're in heaven. 88. Don't be late. 89. won't you be mine? 90. Holy heaven, honey. You can spit. Was this your SNL audition? That was a good one. Baby, you can spit. I know. I've had dinner with them. Well, Garrett, thank you for coming on with us. Garrett, this has been a delight. You're so much fun. Garrett, you're a fun dude. I just feel happier hanging out with you for this hour. Thank you so much, fellas, for even thinking about this old guy. Yeah, you're a good dude, And it's, you know, we all got a job because of you and the squad. Oh, my God. And Lauren and everyone. I just want to say 100 episodes on Jamie Foxx. You're on the Martin show. Talented men. OK, thank you, bud. Extremely talented. And you got your fucking job. We do the best we can. You're terrific. You're tremendous. Excuse me. Many people. Who's better than Garren Morris? Nobody. Listen, many people are saying never better. Nobody's ever done it like him. Come on. Let's get real, folks. No joke. I'm not kidding around. Garrett Morris, here's the deal. Come on. We can do better. We will do better. You got Trump and Biden at the end. I love your impression about him, man. I love you. Thank you, brother. Can we hang out sometime? Can you get my info? You got my number. All right, Garrett. Miss you, bud. No, let me thank you guys for this. I appreciate it. I just really enjoyed this. I know I'm a little fuzzy and my words aren't coming out as well as they normally do but because the dental work but i got the prior joke out i completed it and that made my day it was a three-parter yeah now i'm gonna pack myself an ice get a b12 shot and get a crack of coars light we don't want to end the show with the words suck my dick okay no no what would be the substitution um so um instead of saying suck my dick yes you kind of say how about a hand job dear i guess that's a little more benign maybe not so dramatic i got one good night motherfuckers hey guys if you're loving this podcast which you are be sure to click follow on your favorite podcast app give us a review five-star rating and maybe even share an episode that you've loved with a friend. If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please subscribe. We're on video now. Fly on the Wall is presented by Odyssey, an executive produced by Danny Carvey and David Spade, Heather Santoro and Greg Holtzman, Maddie Sprung-Kaiser and Leah Reese Dennis of Odyssey. Our senior producer is Greg Holtzman and the show is produced and edited by Phil Sweet Tech. Booking by Cultivated Entertainment. Special thanks to Patrick Fogarty, Evan Cox, Maura Curran, Melissa Wester Hilary Schuff Eric Donnelly Colin Gaynor Sean Cherry Kurt Courtney and Lauren Vieira Reach out with us any questions to be asked and answered on the show you can email us at flyonthewall at odyssey.com that's a-u-d-a-c-y dot com