533: Vietnam '68-War, Life, Leadership, and Loss w Marine NCO Jack W. Jaunal

This is Jocko podcast number 533 with echo Charles and me. Jocko willing good evening echo The place is staging battalion Marine Corps base Camp Pendleton, California Most of them are in their teens privates privates first class and Lance corpals Among them are the corpals and sergeants not much older breaking into their 20s They come in all shapes and sizes all hours of the day Most of them are young the new breed of Marines On their way to Vietnam Sprinkled among this group are the old salts Marines with many years of service on their record books Many are veterans of our last war Korea For them this will be their second war For a few like me It's war number three My thoughts rolled back over the years 24 years of soldiering 25 if I counted that part-time bit in the state guard it all began during World War two 1944 was the year and a new recruit was paid $50 a month. I was 17 years old 5 foot 5 and 145 pounds of enthusiasm The Marine Corps turned me down Dejected I tried them all and received the same reply. Sorry Poor eyesight and a history of tuberculosis as a kid Just did not help a guy at all. I was walking in downtown less Los Angeles when I happened to see the sign American semen for American ships join the US maritime service That was my ticket to the war We marched through the city on our way from the recruiting station to the train depot our journey had started I remember how people looked and sometimes waved as we marched by We felt like heroes off to war Hit the deck and move out suddenly we found out how the road to war would be paved still We were young and eager damn the submarines. We are the men of the merchant Marine When I was 18, I volunteered for the army. I could not enlist but they would accept me through the selective service system I was assigned to an infantry unit as a machine gunner However, the war ended before I could get any machine gun into action. So it was to Japan for occupation duty But I can still hear the call machine guns up and I would run forward with 35 pounds of MG barrel across my shoulders and my pack digging into my back The core has been good to me. I thought the only outfit for a professional soldier. I Joined the core in 1952 after I returned from Korea That war was still going on and the core no longer cared about my poor eyesight or that I had TB as a kid Those right there are some excerpts from a book called Vietnam 68 Jack's journal written by Jack W. John Who spent almost 34 years in the military as you could hear started off serving service as a merchant Marine in World War two and Became a soldier at the end of World War two then he served as a soldier in the Korean War Where he participated in seven campaigns Including duty with the British 29th Brigade and as a soldier He also served with the 1st Marine Division During his time in Korea. He was wounded received the Purple Heart and as you just heard after Korea and After seven years of Army service he enlisted in the Marine Corps It's hard to get in the Marine Corps right now with prior service. They don't really take that anymore, but during the Korean War Prior service we don't care So we joined the Marine Corps eventually served in Vietnam Including time during the Tet offensive And some other significant operations there operation Auburn operation Mead River during that time. He was promoted to Sergeant Major and Also during that time he kept a journal and this book is a result of that journal Which was published in 1989? I actually have a signed copy that I'm holding right now After retirement he studied history eventually got his master's degree in American history but This book is a firsthand account of American history from a senior enlisted Marine in Vietnam one who had served in World War two had fought in Korea and He understood the life and the death of the infantryman So Let's get into it He says this In the preface like many veterans of various wars I remember more than one saying I could write a book about this I Had that feeling The two times probably we say it most emphatically are during recruit training and during a wartime experience I never wrote anything about my experiences in World War two all that remains are some memories and a few letters I wrote to my mother I never wrote anything about my experiences in Korea all that remains are more memories and several letters I wrote to my wife I Did write stories about my experiences in Vietnam? These are compiled now as Vietnam 68 Jack's journal this book is a daily record of events my experiences and thoughts at that time the stories are true Written at the time recorded or very soon after From notes on a desk calendar in a pocket notebook on the backs of envelopes or The top of a C ration box and this is some advice That I've been trying to give to people Man take notes And look I'm not talking about you know you hear like the journaling thing like like do journaling to make your life better and Like all that stuff. I'm telling you do it just to remember what the hell was going on in your life Like you went to college, right? Yes, sir. Well, yeah I bet so many things happened in college that were funny cool humorous And you forgot bro. Yeah fully There was a I told you about this I think my mother Sent me a two-page, you know the yellow Note pads or whatever legal pad. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes written in pencil I wrote it and I barely remember the incident, but it was of how I like For lack of a term abandoned my younger brother down in the town by my house. Yeah, I can have to and he uh Like after school like I guess we lost them. I think we ditched them, but you know, it's a small little town Chloe town. That's like small so it's not like oh my gosh But and apparently it was like this thing so anyway and and I'm reading it She sent it to me recently like within the last like three years She sent it to me just not on a wife cuz and then uh, yeah, I was reading it and like yeah That's that's with it's an interesting little slice of a time long gone by the way But it really happened. That was a real time and really vents, you know, and how well did you remember those? Without seeing the paper. Oh, I would never have thought of it ever in my whole life In fact when I was reading it little sparks of memories was coming back like with when I was like, yeah I feel like I remember this day, you know, I don't remember writing it But I you know, it did bring back the actual Memory, you know the way the memories work. I don't know how they work like technically via, you know, I'm not gonna give you the physiology but If you don't make those connections, so here's an example for me like I grew up on the East Coast, right when I go to my hometown I Haven't I do go to my hometown once every ten years. Let's say on average when I go there There's a lot of things I don't remember like people will tell me stories about me that I don't remember and part of it's because I Don't reconnect those neurons every day. Yeah. So counter that when uh, when I was in the Navy I Did 18 out of 20 years stationed in Coronado in SEAL team one SEAL team seven and SEAL team three and trade it and All those buildings when I was at those buildings because they're in different locations now like SEAL team ones in a different location SEAL team threes in a different location SEAL team seven second They're all in different locations out trade. That's in a different location when I was at those commands They were all a hundred meters apart Mm-hmm. So when I was 18 years old, I look at those stairs and I was like I remember walking up those stairs, you know And you get reminded of these things if you don't get reminded of them They fade away. They just fade away And so if you don't take notes on what you're doing and what how things are going and where you are you just forget them Yeah, and if you think about what your life is your life is memories But what if you don't have memories what you you're a dog, right? Yeah, you ever look at your dog You're like, I mean my dog as smart as they seem they have no idea what's going on You know what I mean? Like sometimes, you know, you know, you know, you know when you talk to your dog You're like, hey, buddy. I'm gonna head out for a little while that dog is just like this means nothing He's like am I going with you or not? Like do I get in the car or not? That's the only it's a binary thing Yeah, and when you leave he doesn't know if you're gone forever Yeah, or if you're gone for five minutes, but he's gonna he just look that's the way he's looking at me He's looking at me like I don't know how long you're gonna be gone for Forever is this goodbye? Yeah, but he doesn't know so he's just there and If you don't take notes on what's going on in your life and by the way, I'm not preaching this because I didn't do it I did not do this I wish I would have done this when we had Joe Claiborne on the podcast and he pulled out his journals And he's got detailed drawings of everything that he did for his time in the military Man, that is awesome. And look, it's not just military. That's why I brought up you go into college Right, but you know you go to college you get a job at some place you meet some girl, you know one thing's cool I got letters thankfully You know my wife Saved all the letters that I wrote to her. You know and I she found some yet. She was going through some yesterday I was like dang girl Let's go You know what I'm saying, but here it was yeah, if you don't have that Then You know, what are you gonna do like I was telling her in this letter. I said hey, you know When I get out of the Navy, I'll get a job while be home more Hmm, I said, maybe I'll be a OB lifeguard, you know, oh she beats I said maybe OB lifeguard question mark But the funny thing is I remember thinking that might not be a bad job for me get out Of the Navy retire from the Navy and then be a lifeguard and you know be on down at the beach surf, you know, whatever Be home Go home for lunch or something. You know, that was a real thought that I had So But if I didn't read that I would have been I would have never thought about that again. Yeah, so if you can Make some small notes Even if you just and you're gonna see some of this journals just literally what happened that day minimum minimal of what happened So keep that in mind and you're gonna see some of the Some of the profound writing that comes out of that in this book I'm fattening obviously not reading the whole book hitting some highlights This isn't when he's talking about the guys that are getting trained up to go to Vietnam during his training cycle in the company The Marine replacement spends three days in administrative Administration matters and then he moves to a field training area for nine days Here he is giving classes on classes on Viet Cong mines and booby traps search of a Viet Cong village booby trap trails and fires The various weapons available to him, especially the M16 rifle a lot has been said about the M16 Most of it's good after firing it I feel it's a good weapon But must be kept clean to function properly an entire Vietnamese village has been built at the staging Battalion after a demonstration of the techniques of the village search each Marine applies the lessons learned by going through the village under simulated conditions What struck me about this is this is exactly what we did getting guys ready for Afghanistan and Iraq We built simulated villages We told them how to clear them and what to do with them and then we put simulated conditions The same applies to the Viet Cong trail to see if he notices mines and booby traps By the way as you heard from Roger Hayden on this podcast They started doing that point man trail during nom and we still ran the exact same point man trail when I was running training Upon completion of the training cycle Marines are sent to one of three bases to fly out Travis Air Force Base Northern Air Force Base or Marine Corps Air Station at El Toro telephone calls are made letters written then To Okinawa aboard a 707 excess uniforms and gear are stored at Okinawa a 24 hour to 48 hour stop Those going to Vietnam landed to Nang for me another tour has started And he arrives 23 December 1967. It's Christmas Eve and those going home are trying to get out Someone not make it in time for Christmas at home army buses bring them in at all hours of day and night Many of them are still dirty in only a few hours out of Vietnam Outside a group of young Marines in their fresh greens three or four more three or four ribbons on their chest are smiling and joking Waiting to shove off for home Passing them or another group sea bags on their shoulders going to barracks These Marines are their replacements going south when their flight is ready. This is taking place in Okinawa. I didn't make that clear As a couple pass me I hear one say I sure hope I come back as he looks at the group going home His buddies reply. Don't worry. You'll come back one way or another You'll come back That's like the classic the classic Vietnam scene right the the battle-hardened guys coming out of the field in Jacked-up camis and all that dirty skinny Worn and then the fresh cuts coming in they're just fresh off the fresh off the boat Getting ready to head over there You know, I talked about that on one of the unraveling podcast We had some of the contractors that were getting ready Or they swung by this is my first appointment. This is like 2003 2004 actually, this was 2004 and We like the contractors showed up from like a contracting company and You know, they're wearing like brand new gear and You're looking at it. You're like, man, I don't know if I put my magazines over there Like it's gonna be hard to get to like when you're in a vehicle You're not gonna be able to access your pistol like you're having all those thoughts and then the one thing like they were traveling in Armored vehicles but armored vehicles at that time were just basically like a Ford Explorer and they put like armored they put armored windows in kind of armor the door They'd put in the trunk or whatever. We call it the trunk of a SUV Yeah, so that thing wasn't armored, but they put like armor behind the backseat so And they didn't really do much with the suspension It was just basically the cheapest possible armored vehicle you could make and then I remember asking the guys like hey Do you guys have run flats? Which is a vehicle tire that can run even when it gets shot will keep going for a little while I'm like do you guys have run flats? No, we don't so it means if you get your tire shot out You're not gonna be able to drive anymore and it was terrible to see and it was a foreboding of what was gonna happen Fast forward a little bit the Marines live in hooches about eight or more to a hooch many have TVs in the hooch There is a chapel for church services and a recreation hunt for working out drawing sporting gear and some paperback novels The mess hall is large and being fixed up all the time at night movies are shown there One incoming shell hit the corner of the mess hall, but it's repaired now Just giving you like some kind of a feel for what the guys are living when arriving in Vietnam We are taught to respect the native customs traditions and religion don't shoot up the temples or destroy the graves of Ancestors respect the native beliefs the Marines try but sometimes is mighty hard The tracked landing vehicles LTVs from one of our companies had been going on a path between some graves in their area of operations When the mine went off Wounding the driver and causing quite a bit of damage Charlie knew that the vehicles would not go through the graveyard So as the vehicles were channeled between the graves he placed his minds in the best position the company The company sergeant company gunnery sergeant on a second tour of duty in Vietnam was suspicious He ordered the remaining vehicles side to side and drove through the graveyard tearing the graves apart Many graves in Vietnam are about 18 inches high small mounds of earth afterward the Marines dug through the graves not one body not a bone nothing Charlie had made a dummy grave site knowing that the vehicles would not go through and it planted his mind Where the vehicles would have to travel? Sort of like fighting a war with the deck stacked against you Sometimes it is hard for the Marines to respect those customs traditions religions and graveyards because the enemy is going to take advantage of it Now I'm they had that thing where they you know, they called the VC Charlie and then they talk about Charlie as a individual human, you know, like he planted the mind. All right. Yeah, yeah, like we would call the enemy moose And But you you moose is plural. It's like the moose. It wasn't like a moose, right? It was the moose all of them They all planted a mine there. Yeah, cuz but Charlie's singular Yeah, and so they talk now we talk about the enemy like we would call the enemy he yeah Yeah, you'll hear the military leaders will do that. You know, we've got the enemy over here We think he might do this they talk about the enemy in a singular way But moose is a little less singular. Yeah, the moves over here. No, we never really said that I always think thought of the moose is plural. Yeah, they tried to say we couldn't say moose. Yeah This is what disrespect force. Yeah, because of the traditions, right? And Mujahideen is like warrior for God But here's what when this word came down I sent up the chain of command that the local populace who hated The insurgents that were fighting and killing them, you know what they called the insurgents that were fighting and killing them Mujahideen Moose moose. Yeah, and so, you know, we were being so aggressively politically correct. Yeah that it was We went overboard They're moose the local populace who hates them calls them moose. Yeah, Mujahideen very principle Yeah check Fast forward a little bit. By the way, this is just a fantastic book 9 January 1968 The young corporal had no statement to make and by the way just echo Charles So he's a senior guy, you know, we've we've read a lot of books from senior officers we've read a lot of books from frontline kind of Soldiers and Marines this guy's a senior enlisted Marine So his perspective is is a little different than we're used to hearing and again for our podcast just by virtue of People that write books. We've got a lot of junior enlisted guys We've got a lot of officers and then senior officers, but the senior NCO We've done some but he's a really good example of it That's why his perspective is is so interesting The young corporal had no statement to make he had given a written one at the investigation The company commander and I were at battalion headquarters because the Marine was from our company The Sergeant Major had just marched the Marine in and the Colonel asked him if he had any statement to make I Have read your statement said the Colonel Would you care to repeat it to me to be sure I have read it correctly? Yes, sir and The Marine told his story the Marine a corporal had been in charge of an ambush patrol one night outside the wire His patrol instructions were to set up an all-night ambush for the VC After the corporal placed his Marines in position a noise was heard where no Marine was supposed to be Thinking it was the VC some of the patrol members fired It was one of their own men he had moved out of position and wandered into the kill zone He told his buddies in the patrol to say the VC shot him He didn't want any Marines to be blamed because the guy lived so he got shot by his own guys He lived and he told his buddies in the patrol to say the VC shot him He didn't want any of the Marines to be blamed the corporal talked it over with the patrol And they decided to claim it was enemy action Upon return to camp the corporal made his report. It was a false report Next day on his own he decided to correct his report and make a true statement Now he faced the Colonel for final action on his case now what you got to remember about this is if you don't tell everyone What happened no one learned anything Because that's a mistake. Yeah, and if you don't say hey guys We had one of our guys that had to take a piss or he wanted to go check something out and he left the wire And we shot him if you don't say that to everybody other people will make that mistake. That's what makes this that's what makes this so important Continue on you step forward on your own question the Colonel. Yes, sir The control of your squad was poor The corporal as a squad leader must have complete control of his squad at all times He may be called upon to make quick decisions at any moment They must be right the right decisions the corporal made an error corrected it later, but he made the wrong decision Now he was man enough to step forward and admit it Marines get killed in war and sometimes it has been friendly fire that killed them War is hell and accidents do happen No need for a false report and unfortunate accident, but it was not his fault a Marine had wandered into the wrong area after he had been placed in position by the patrol leader Fortunately the Marine was only wounded seriously, but he was recovering in the hospital For a false report Reduction to the rank of Lance Corporal said the Colonel Colonel Considering the excellent service record of the corporal his performance of duty and based on the recommendation of others the Colonel continued The sentence is suspended for a period of three months. So he busted him down in rank but said If you can keep your nose clean for three months, you'll be okay but You can understand that if you're a corporal and you have a blue on blue You think this is the mortal sin So you don't understand that the senior leadership goes hey man, we get it accidents happen But when you lie about it, that's a problem again once again lessons don't get learned the cover-up will always get you You cannot cover things up Is That understood said the Colonel as he looked in the corporal hard in the eyes Yes, sir to reply the corporal and a very slight look of relief seemed to pass over his face You showed the mark of a man When you step forward and corrected an error use better judgment from now on yes, sir about face order the sergeant major march out There is a young corporal in this battalion that has the mark of a man upon him a man among many in this battalion of Marines Taking that's a what a great story two pages taking ownership of what's going on in your world Yeah, I mean, I know you put the tone on it when you're reading it, but he was like Accidents happen no need for a fake report That's kind of that's kind of solid because there's there's different ways to say that you know like if you're It was almost like Making a fake report seemed kind of understandable, but hey, don't worry. Don't there's no need for that You know, I see why you thought you had to do that, you know, but hey, there's no need for that because accidents happen and you know, whatever rather than Let's say uh Accidents accidents happen man, you shouldn't have made that fake report, you know kind of a tone, you know now you're really You know, it's a different kind of thing where you can now with that first one You can emphasize this like learning process like hey, this is like kind of part of the process, you know Don't jam it up by doing you know this stuff, you know, it's okay. You don't have to do that You know, it is very strange how people perceive what is gonna get them in trouble. Yeah, right? And we've talked about this in a bunch of different ways, but Thinking you know when you cover something up, it's gonna be way worse. You should learn that as a kid You know the time that you lied to your parents at the time that you Whatever you you tried to get one over on the teacher and you try and cover something up That's when things that's that's what you're gonna get in trouble for people make mistakes Now look if you're doing something intentionally bad and you purposely do something and then you try and cover it up Like that's gonna be double bad, but when you're making an honest mistake I could promise you no one wanted to freaking wound one of their own Marines guaranteed so You shouldn't be covering that up not to mention like I said now you got lessons that are not being learned. Yeah Yeah, that's not good you and this It's so funny I can see these little patterns where it kind of gets all mapped down to this idea of short term versus long term You know so like covering up something or making excuses or whatever that's like so much of a short term in the moment Cope you know, but if you see kind of the big picture and the overall thing that's going on long term It makes more sense even from a logical even from a survival standpoint Or even it from a defense mechanism standpoint if you're like thinking of the long term You're thinking about learning you're thinking about like how is this gonna affect things? over time you know Rather than yeah covering up if you think about how is this how is my cover-up gonna affect things over time? One you're living a lie, which is shameful and you know that I think that haunts most people You know when you're living a lie. Yeah, cuz when's it gonna come out when they're gonna come out You're getting held hostage about it. Yeah, you know, it's like feel slimy to an insight and then um And then yeah, like are you sitting like no one learns from it? She was saying but then even when you can expand that out it kind of makes you think like hey Let's say you're dealing with kids or you're a boss or you are a boss and you're dealing with like your employees or whatever it kind of Paints a different picture than what you might see normally so like you know, you know the kids make mistake they get punished for Or the kids make mistake he admits to it and it's like well at least you admitted to it kind of a thing but kind of Probably beneficial be like hey, I like that you freaking manned up That's what a that's what a real like man or human or you know, whatever That's what that's what a person with character does and Brian. I noticed that good job. You know keep that up kind of a thing Um If you can kind of engineer it where you're cultivating that it'll come more natural over time. No doubt No doubt. Yeah, we lean real hard into you lied to me or you try to cover this up And you're gonna pay for that as opposed to like oh you did a good job admitting that something went wrong good job Yeah leaning in that one more. Yeah that positive reinforcement the idea of like problem solving You know a problem solution kind of way of handling it I felt like it's been a good good move, you know, it's a I don't know someone forgot to take out trash or someone freakin You know spilt some whatever whatever the problem is the problem is okay My boy spills chocolate milk whatever The problem is The problem is the smoke is spilt. Yeah, right Um, the problem is hey, maybe maybe he was wasn't mean as careful as maybe could it or should have been in the kitchen in that particular moment in that particular Place those are the problems, right? Don't make another problem by yelling at the kid now you got another problem won't still spilt He still was not very careful and now you kind of either whether be damaged the relationship now He's scared now. You know, whatever If you're like, hey look the problem is the mocus built we're gonna try to be more careful Clean up the mohk. No problem. You know, thanks for taking responsibility That's a better way to do it then yelling at him cuz now okay, he's he cleans it up problem solve He'll be more careful problem solve He took responsibility and is more inclined to take more responsibility in the future when mistakes happen, which they do Future problem solved seems hey. There you go rather than yelling and screaming yelling and screaming That's not gonna help Fast forward 13 January 1968 the reaction squad was going out on patrol this afternoon So I decided to go along since all my clerks and the supply sergeant are on the reaction squad Now why would a 40 year old first sergeant go on patrol with a squad of Marines when he did not have to go? It has been 17 years since my last patrol Korea 1950. I Was a corporal then and much younger H&S company provides the reaction squad for the battalion. It's composed of the Marines from heat and steam I believe it exemplifies the doctrine of the core all Marines and riflemen First our riflemen first and specialists second. So what the group that he's in charge of is kind of like the administrative group headquarters and But they are the quick reaction force So if something happens these clerks and cooks and they're gonna get their gear on and go get it So they're going out on patrol fast forward a little bit We leave the road now and start across country sometimes referred to as Indian country. There are many native graves through here We see bullet scars on many a headstone Fast forward there are times Charlie plants booby traps on the side of the dykes then fires if you jump off and Into the patty you may land on a booby trap So if Charlie fires a few rounds this old man will fall down on the trail That's something the Vietnam guys told us and it's always true Like you're walking down the street and there's like a if you start getting shot at and there's a perfect area of cover Chances are you get blown up if you go in there and this got it. I didn't experience this but in Afghanistan The IEDs got so bad that even they got contacted. They wouldn't like Move to cover they would stay where they are to get down, but they'd have to be very very cautious Fast forward in any interesting three-hour walk So now I've been on patrol what was it like routine I guess after 24 years of soldiering one of one type or another It seems a bit routine the feeling at 40 is more relaxed than it was at 20 The average age of this squad is probably 20 They are good and know their business some of them have been hit while on patrol so they know the score You can tell they like seeing an old salt along it gives them a bit of confidence So you do not want to fail them if the chips are down It has been said that the old salt is the anchor on the line and maybe he is They know and I know that a first sergeant is not supposed to go out on patrols, but it does not happen every day and I think some of them liked it 13 young Marines on patrol and an old salt thinking hell these rice paddies smell no different than the ones in Korea Fast forward 16 January 1968 rumor is we may have we may be hit in Da Nang area before Tet Vietnamese New Year 100% alert all hands and holes Can sleep but ready for action Fast forward according to military assistance command Vietnam statistics for 1967 are 87,534 enemy dead the total of the enemy dead is the equivalent of more than a hundred and fourteen NVA battalions Americans killed in action KIA for 1967 or 15,997 It's a different level than I experienced for sure Fast forward January 24 January 1968 the old war horse heard the sound of the bugle and trotted off to battle It was about 430 in the afternoon when the word was passed reaction squad and tractors down to the COC bunker now Draw your ammunition draw your rations ammo Radio men and a corpsman. I went topside and talked to one of my office clerks Sergeant Tidwell the assistant squad leader. Why don't you go with us first sergeant? I sure would like to but the old man would probably say no you could check with the captain He wasn't too happy about me going last time the old war horse could hear the bugles He sort of got that old feeling Some of that gung-ho-ness Not wanting to be left in the rear with the gear he galloped off to see the company commander for permission to go Can't do it said the captain damn it to hell. Why not skipper? After some hard talking to the skipper the skipper said okay if the Exo approves the Exo was the battalion executive officer So off gallop the old war horse again No said the major how could we justify it? Although the answer was no the bugle could still be heard But it was no use first sergeants do not go with the squads on patrol or small-sized operations Besides the Colonel was against it It was six in the evening the tracks bellowed a roar with their engines and started they through the wire at the back of the CP area The old war horse could see the reaction squad atop the tracks Corporal Scott the special services NCO corporal Malone the chaplains assistant Corporal Stubbs who would be going home soon Sergeants Rebo Nord and Tidwell and others through the exhaust sand and setting sun The old war horse sensed another feeling as the young Colts rode off. I damn near cried He wants to go get some And he can't and they tell me can't like it's you know Two tracks going out with whatever 12 15 Marines He is just not justifiable and you know, he did go out on some patrols. You can go out, you know, like the right time But they skipper said no fast-forward 7 February 1968 There were two small paper bags on my desk I Knew what they were were before I opened them The personal effects of the bodies of our two Marines killed in action. I Opened the first bag it contained a small religious medallion Insignia of rank and a cigarette lighter The lighter still had blood on it The Marine had been shot three times in the chest Chris I yelled yes top Clean the blood off this lighter Can't send it home like that Chris is a Lance Corporal Steve Christensen Boise Idaho the company driver a good Marine The other bag contained $11 in military script and a religious medal on a chain One married one signal Charlie plays no favorites Chris get the Jeep. I want to go to the hospital We have two wounded Marines there both from the same operation Four wounded and two dead that platoon really got hit We arrived at the hospital and it was like all the others in a war zone Men sitting around medics and corpsmen going from place to place The stretcher bears waiting for the copters to come in with the medivacs One right there was fresh must have just arrived The sign on the door said Ward 5a. He's in here Lance Corporal Eugene Bevel from Texarkana, Arkansas was wounded in the left hand and below the right eye by shrapnel and small arms fire The LTV he was riding on was hit wall in support of an infantry unit He saw his buddies get hit the one with the $11 on my desk was quote reaching down to help a wounded grunt when he got hit Belleville continued the story. I saw him straighten up when he was hit one of the men grabbed him before he fell off the track Belleville sat there a minute quiet He had that stare many men get in wars when a battle or fight is still fresh in their minds remembering what it was like With their buddies dying around them He had a misty look in his eyes when I left Probably glad it was over for him and yet not wanting to leave his buddies behind. I Do not know I suppose it was a look of unbelief The ambulance was leaving with a load of cases when I climbed aboard the Jeep Among the fringe benefits of being a first sergeant Is the honor of visiting Marines in the hospital identifying the KIAs and inventorying personal effects? Someone has to do it For my KIAs it is all over For the wounded in action if they're lucky it's a trip back home For me it will probably mean more KIAs and wounded in action and more widows and heartbroken parents That part of war has never changed Few days later 13 February 1968 Is customary for the skipper to write a letter of condolence to the family of a Marine killed in action After the skipper wrote a letter to the parents of one of our KIAs and the wife of another I sat down to write one of my own I Had some color Polaroid photographs of the memorial service held for our two KIAs and thought the parents and wife would like to have them Dear Mrs. Smith and the Smith is just the fake name dear Mrs. Smith Enclosed our two photographs of the memorial service conducted by our battalion for your husband and another Marine recently killed in action I Know your grief is great at this time, but it may help to know that when your husband was killed He was trying to help another Marine He was among Marines from this company providing support to an infantry company in a battle a few miles from here When your husband was hit he was reaching down from his LVT to try to pull a rifleman aboard His LVT had gone in to try and rescue Marines. I Thought that you would like to know this very sincerely Jack W. Johnnell first sergeant of Marines And Later he received this letter which he published in the book Dear first sergeant Johnnell. I've received your letter and pictures and I will be forever thankful My husband was a hero and he was a hero to his son All I knew was that he was killed. I did not know how he died now. I know He was a hero and always will be to his son and I God bless you Fast forward 25 February 1968 I Enter the company office and the skipper gives me the scoop first. It will be the same as last night 100% alert No one sleeps. We will go to the wire at 1900 hours and come off at about 0 700 tomorrow So one of the things that I you know fast-forwarding through a bunch of the book, but they're on a base Like a forward operating base and they're expecting attack and so The enemy is outside the wire and they have to protect their small forward operating base So a lot of times a lot of their duty even when they're back in base They're out there, you know on the line on the wire on the perimeter securing the perimeter and It's long miserable nights night after night So they're out there on this guess I'll go check the line and and I start for the first hole It was getting misty now gonna get wet tonight. The Marines are awake and alert near bunker 3. I meet the skipper He's out checking the line also It was at bunker 3. We had two men wounded in December takes me about 45 minutes to check the line on my way back to my bunker I stop at the mess hall for a cup of coffee the night cook Corporal William E. Sturman from Midland, Texas looks up and greets me How many gallons of coffee have you made tonight? I ask about 45 gallons. He replies. That's a lot of coffee How many last night 90 gallons we may beat it tonight. It's early yet We drink a lot of coffee to stay awake these nights Marines come to the galley and get coffee all night They fill their canteens and take it back for themselves and their buddy in the hole Midnight it starts to rain Three o'clock in the morning. I go check positions. How's it going Marine rough replies the Marine, but at least it stopped raining Good Marines Work all day and stay up all night two maybe three hours of sleep in the morning and all over again How many nights will we do this for? Last time it was 10 That's the duty and Again, you know I'm fast-forwarding through a bunch of this stuff and he goes through some of the monotony of it Some of the fear of it some of the stress of it very very heavy and It's just day after day after day and occasionally, you know like they'll do that for 10 days And then they'll get a little bit of security or they'll get intel that you know the enemy's standing down So they'll get a couple of good nights sleep, but and then on top of that they're going out on patrol in the day You know it's interesting You know in Vietnam the VC attacked at night and the VC owned the night is what they said But and the seals were one of the few groups that actively patrolled at night They met the enemy where the enemy was But these guys they they sit on base at night and Secure their base, but then during the day they're going on patrols fast-forward 9 April 1968 my gear was in the Jeep I climbed aboard and told my driver to shove off. I was on my way. It had been 13 years since I left recon I was looking forward to this assignment Recon had grown inside over size over the years from a company to a battalion I waved to the guard as we drove out the gate third Amtrak is a good outfit. I thought But I'd always wanted to return to recon and now I was on my way Last time I was a staff sergeant in a division recon company now I would be sergeant major of a reach recon battalion so he's Got promoted and he's moving from the track element that I was with now. He's going to Be with a recon battalion fast-forward. I picked up my gear and walked towards my new hooch It felt good to be back in recon especially as a sergeant major 26 April 1968 One of our reconnaissance patrols by the name of rice Krispies Had been hit about four o'clock in the morning by enemy mortar or rocket fire Their mission was completed and they were to be lifted out by helicopter a daylight Seven enemy rounds hit them The first one hit a rock directly in their position one Marine was killed the radio operator Three were wounded one seriously. We arrived at the hospital just as the Medevac helicopter arrived as it landed a couple of Cormin ran out with a stretcher. It was the KIA the body wrapped in a rain poncho We followed them into the receiving hut the Cormin cut the binding and unwrapped the poncho It was a young Marine probably no more than 19 He was covered with dirt and blood and although he had been on patrol for five days He had very few whiskers too young to grow a beard yet He was hit in the back by shrapnel going through his pack and radio The back of his head was bloody Looks as if the one in the back of the head that killed him. I Notice the dead Marines first sergeant had entered He is a short man tough and all Marine Corps. I Sometimes think of him as a small bulldog a fighter. I noticed the bulldogs eyes. They look a little misty He came down to identify the body one of the more unpleasant tasks of a first sergeant It hurts the good ones especially He was a good man I Remembered seeing the Marine in the area. He looked different then The Cormin took off the dead Marines identification tag the body was pale eyes open It had been about five hours since he was hit It's a little hard to take every time you see one of these wounded or dead Marines It must be a fatherly reaction or maybe I subconsciously think of them as my own sons As they removed articles from the body, I noticed a small piece of cloth About three by five inches It was red and white with a small patch of blue in one corner Dirty with some blood on it. It was between his chest and camouflage jacket a small American flag He was a good Marine and he thought enough of this flag to carry it on patrol with him As it was taken from his young and now lifeless body. I could not help but think of the other young men alive Who burn or try to burn our flag the flag this young Marine died for I? Am in no mood for flag burners today I Fast forward 17 May 1968 patrol hit by lightning last night one man died in the hospital one man wounded by an enemy booby trap 19 May 1968 Ho Chi Minh birthday, you know that that lightning strike There's more about these lightning strikes Never I never thought about that before in all my reading of Vietnam You know you're out there with an antenna you're out there with a metal antenna sticking up There's lightning storms and it was not uncommon That guys would get hit and killed by lightning And and not only that you're gonna see a lot of this like When your environment is explosives helicopters machine guns Out in the wilderness like there's there's a lot of violent ways and accidental ways to die and You often don't think about that as much 22 May 22 May 1968 one KIA reported and two wounded in action Staff Sergeant Hughes killed with the first air calf. He told me what happened and he was right So there's a couple Marines that get attached to the first air calf and Sergeant Hughes didn't feel good about it Staff Sergeant Hughes didn't feel good about it 24 May 1968 major Keating our S3 officer died of wounds our observers were with teams from the air cab to view their methods of operations An exchange of tactical ideas, especially recon inserts so they'd sent two guys with the air cab and They both end up getting killed memorial services 26 May 1968 memorial services for major Keating and Staff Sergeant Hughes darn near cried 28 May 1968 team in trouble one killed in action four fell off a cliff 29 May 1968 tried to go out with the rescue team rested team brought in at 1230 30 May 1968 went out to hill 10 and back patrol ran into trouble one killed in action one wounded in action 30 May 9 31 May 1968 two patrols in trouble four wounded in action and this is Again, these are small notes that he's taking but at least you can look back and remember what happened on that day And you can see what their days are like day after day after day. It's absolutely brutal fast forward 29 June 1968 two killed in action one wounded in action from company a 3 July 1968 lost eight men Went down and copter shot down all lost 4 July 1968 lieutenant wounded in head today while on patrol 5 July 1968 visited patients in hospital 7 July 1968 The chapel is almost filled when I entered it would be crowded today with Marines outside listening before the memorial was over It was a rough one to take eight men lost all at one time our largest single lost to date One of our recon patrols was being inserted when their helicopter came under enemy fire The helicopter almost landed when Charlie opened up The pilot radioed under fire tried to take off and as he did the chopper was hit the report from the escort aircraft Said it went up in a ball of flame fell to the ground and exploded The pilot copilot pilot to crewmen and our eight men were killed our Reaction force went in and brought out the bodies. The only man not burned was the pilot. He had been blown out of the aircraft. I Looked at the memorial program They were all listed by faith Latter-day Saints Catholic Protestant Jewish The Body straightened as they sang the hymn and the wards became stronger at the end as the hymn faded away Everyone came to attention as they heard the firing squad ready aim fire Ready aim fire as the sleuthing volley was fired. I noticed a young sergeant in front of me his soldiers twitched it with every crack of the rifles Ready aim fire And then the sound of taps flowed through the air through the chapel on the hill and across the fields There's no sound more fitting for the military than taps sad and yet beautiful It can make the tears flow There had been a tear or two in the eyes of those in the chapel It is hard to keep that small wet trail off the cheek. I know I Fourteen July 1968 attended church services for two more KIA 15 July 1968 two men lost on patrol got separated 18 July 1968 put a sign up on the LZ named in honor of major Keating Keating Field Unofficial, but who will know the difference? You Get to a Point where you kind of gonna do what you're gonna do out there. Yeah, you know you have to I'll have to Remind myself and talk to Leif about this, but like there's some kind of protocol Like when Mark was killed we just renamed, you know, well, this is now camp Mark Lee. Yeah, like there are some protocol to follow Mm-hmm. I do not think we did any of the protocol You're gonna do what you're gonna do you you know, it's a weird thing Like what matters? Yeah, you know you lose eight guys you lose Keating you lose these you're losing guys all the time You know these rules and regulations Will stick to the big ones but some of this bullshit ain't happening. Yeah, we're doing what we're doing 20 July 1968 0700 had scare H53 helicopter exploded in air fought 25 of our recon Marines were on board. It was the wrong chopper chopper But all hands were lost So this is after you was eight guys of you know, you hear rumor that Helicopter went down with 25 guys on board. It's a nightmare 29 July 1968 Recon team shot out of a landing zone 30 July 1968 killed in action last night was a Marine who took my photo on a patrol And he this is a part of the book that I didn't read he goes on a patrol And you know guy they're out there in the field and a guy took his picture and that guy is killed in action August 1 August 1968 OP on hill 200 overrun by NVA 11 wounded in action five killed in action Reaction Force company E3 wounded in action by booby trap patrol hit 1k a So this is a brutal deployment I Six August 1968 accidental discharge of a 45 on hill 200 medevac with a man of little toe with a man's tip of little toe shot off So again, you got guys with you know a battalion worth of guys 7 August 1968 Went to the first Hospital company three Marines from hill 425 brought in injured from 50 caliber machine gun exploding all okay Again, you're around freaking explosives. That's what a bullet is a little explosive 11 August 1968 one killed in action one wounded in action from our own claymore accidental on hill 425 How does that happen there's a million ways that can happen what did the did the claymore fall down Right you have the claymore aimed in one direction it falls over gets tripped over whatever now it's pointed the wrong way claymores are Directional you know the claymore minus yeah front towards enemy. Yeah front towards enemy Bro when I was a young kid we we blew claymores and You know our our instructors are cadre We what we did was not I wouldn't it's not safe You shouldn't do it, but we would detonate those claymores like we would be a few feet from them like you'd be like in a behind a tree or like in a little in a little Depression, you know with like maybe a little rock outcropping Just clacking off claymores again. Do not do this cuz it's too loud in it. It's too loud It's dangerous like there's all kinds. There's all the million reasons not to do it overall bad idea bad idea but you can be very close to them and You know the explosion you're gonna feel the back blast I mean you get your bell freaking rung and again, this is stupid. Don't do it, but that's what we did back then Part of it was you know you you know we thought we were going to mom hell Yeah, you still think still think that you know it was 1991 But hey you got to know how close you can be to these things in case you got a clack one off, okay Now we know let me ask you this about the claymore by your estimation How far if the front right straight up front towards enemy how? What kind of range does that have like what a lethal distance or whatever? Yeah, the kill zone is probably like I forget what the official kill zone is But it's probably like 20 meters maybe 25 meters or something like that. Yeah strong. It has stuff in it Yeah, it's got a little ball bearings. Yeah, these are like we had to know how many of those ball bearings there were how many are there? I don't know But like what is it like 10 20 oh no, no, no, it's 100. Okay. Yeah, bro I feel like that's gonna like that's gonna jam you up there like they're like the size of You know they're like a small ball bearing. Yeah, like tiny ball not a BB a little bigger than a baby. Yeah. Yeah So that that kill zone, but there's all kinds of ways like first of all, you know Someone could be planning it go off it could fall down and now it blasts towards people someone someone could set up in the wrong Direction that shit happens. Yeah, that's why it literally says front towards enemy. Yeah, but if you're a new guy and you're you make a mistake Boom you crack off a claymore and you wound your own guys. Okay, or you're distracted or whatever, bro When you get and I have a lot of respect for that notion right there where it was like front towards enemy and still people jam it up But I don't I don't think that's stupid. You understand that it's written on there for a reason Yes, and it still can get over. Oh, yeah, cuz shit be happening. So the so Every time I got surgery, right? They They mark they put an arrow on your arm like in my on my knee Oh, yeah, yeah, I got they draw it just with a pen. Yeah before I go ahead. I was like, bro. What are you even doing? He's like, oh, well, that's to make sure that the doctor operates on the correct arm, but I'm like But Chart yeah, you'd have a drawn-out thing here with it, you know, it says right here, right distal But the whole freaking jargon and they're like I'm just saying like this there's a reason Yeah, this kind of stuff can happen like this. This hot, you know hospitals are hectic like just the whole thing And it's like it it just helps assure that the job is done correctly And so I asked us like has that ever happened before and just laughing like yeah, that happens before. Oh, yeah It's like all right cool man. Hey, who am I? What am I gonna say? I would put an X on the other arm. Do not cut this arm So yeah, exactly right bruh. So who might just say like what I'm being for real because putting an arrow to indicate like that's Not as good because you could still like pull the other arm out You forget about the right. I put a freaking X on that thing like not this arm I would write in English not this arm the other arm, please So 14 August 1968 1500 Memorial service for KIA 22 August 1968 hill 200 hit one KIA three wounded in action Company E reaction force in at 0600 visited wounded in hospital repelled out of helicopter with company a surprised the hell out of the first sergeant And I'm there there's You know going I'm fast-forwarding through all kinds of Good stuff here get this book. It's out of print get it get a copy of it This was kind of an interesting series here 12 October 1968 monsoon rains all morning 13 October 1968 Some rain not much behind on helicopter lifts 14 October 1968 monsoon rains all day. No copters flying 15 October 1968 rains most of the morning but clear most of the afternoon 16 October 1968 monsoon rains six inches in the morning supposed to last for another 48 hours Can't get patrols in or out by air no copters. So that's when that monsoon season hits and it's just brain 18 October back to rains almost all day not as heavy couple teams three days overdue 1300 general LeMay for briefing on recon plenty of security It's always interesting when you connect these names 19 October 1968 got two patrols in three days overdue because of bad weather Tired wet and hungry. How'd you like to be out on patrol? You get extended three days in the field 20 October 1968 memorial services for Marine killed by fire and burns Marine was okay when the Colonel and I visited him at the hospital was in spirits by the time we got back to the CP Info the Marine had died They have a nice spell, but I'm gonna fast forward 7 November 1968 had a first KIA since August Sergeant from force almost blown in half by grenade Went to ID the body at med battalion the sergeant had been killed the battalion police NCO and wanted to be in the bush With our recon patrols why I asked him even though I knew the answer. I supported his request for reconnaissance duty Hell, I remember how I felt during World War two He came to see me before his first patrol got my transfer sergeant major. Thanks for your help Now he was dead From his chest to his groin was a big hole I Ten November 1968 Marine Corps birthday 193 years old ceremony visited hospitals Visited hospital patients and Brig He's got people in the brig goes and visit those guys. I wish you he didn't talk about what they who they were what they did, but 12 November 1968 bad accident grenade went off on LZ killed two Marines two in serious condition five wounded with small two with Small cuts wounds visited wounded in the hospital In the battalion fast forward 5 December 1968 in the battalion area the only the regulation cap was authorized But when on patrol in the bush recon Marines could wear almost anything on their heads Most of the recon Marines like the RVN jungle hat or berets several war their Marine issued field capped Some starched This is like one of the most classic pieces of Marine Corps Americana other types of headgear included the pirate a Green or camouflaged cloth tied around the top of their head duck hunter a small brim field hat front down and back up Collegiate a small brim field hat turned up all around For an aft the brim of the jungle hat was turned up in front and back as favored by gunnery sergeant TF sparks Ozzy a large brimmed Australian type bush hat with the side turned up Sometimes the side was pinned up with a black Marine Corps emblem Safari a large brimmed Australian type bush hat with the brim turned down all around This type was favored by corporal WD Paul his buddy Lance corporal gradun ski Favored the duck hunter both Marines or members of company being just returned from the bush the cowboy The new jungle hat with the sides turned up and creased on the crown of favorite The beret favored by private first-class WG Burton of company a Sembrero the new jungle hat with the brim turned up all around old core The new jungle hat shaped like the Marine Corps campaign hat of yesteryear my favorite We it's a bummer that we wear helmets now You like that. I mean, yeah, I like that but also I I I When when I went through buds getting a floppy hat. Mm-hmm was like You know you kind of when I got a seal team one and I got issued my floppy hat Yeah, I felt like I was in the days, you know, like I felt like I was a nom, right? It's before that you're wearing this weekend starts cover like a baseball hat looking type thing Yeah, this eight-point cover they called it But then when you get your your your jungle hat your boony hat your floppy hat Your bush hat That's all the names all of them call it whatever you want floppy hat you floppy hat you there's a picture of you That's the one. It's like this right like a yeah Like like Jesse Vintura did in Predator you ever watched Predator? He went Australian style because one side was up. Yeah Yeah, that's also that's when I was trying to sell So but that's a floppy hat. That's a floppy hat and I'd have to see it because it looked like it is a little that looked a little bit more like a Corgi'll or like a little bit more official or more formal look like a more formal the way I remember it But a floppy hat, you know or a bush hat or a boony hat or a bucket hat Sometimes they call them all kinds of different things, but getting that back in the day was like for me Because I'd always seen the frogmen from Vietnam the seals from Vietnam in the floppy hat and so that was You know that was the deal and then you did wear it With a little bit of you know, you it has character and how you wear it has character and by the way you ever seen like um a cartoon where Like the person's the characters Face or like hat kind of shows their expression. You know what I'm saying? So like let's say you're wearing your your boony hat and you're like kind of in the game You can like flip the front up and you're kind of paying attention But then you can get tired you can like pull the front down if you're feeling cocky Maybe you put up go go like cowboy style like you can you can kind of like reflect your mood Let you let your guys know where you're at With the floppy yeah floppy out a lot of that but I still have The floppy hat that I got issued Yeah, I was a new guy at SEAL team one and I had at my whole career and unfortunately I never wore it. I never wore in combat because we were wearing helmets. Yeah, like we switched to helmets, you know Right around when the war started when in the floppy hat that you have I know Oh, well, I know some of this because I have I have some pictures of you wearing your floppy hat And you looked very pleased with the whole scenario for sure. I thought I was I thought I was a nom The jungle though the pictures I have like you're gonna go for sure. Where's that like Guam or something like this? I think well was either over in Southeast Asia kind of sounds like mom But I was at Guam or I was in Thailand or something still or we also used to go to jungle training in South America Yeah, so that broke out that floppy hat and just getting rained on and just feeling like you were in nom Yep The picture looks like your face your facial expression for all the guys from mom salute man. Those guys are my heroes, you know and You know Even like now, you know just having to had the opportunity to talk with all these guys the guys from SOG the infantry guys The the Marine Corps grunts guns up, you know what I'm saying? like these guys that war and you know me growing up always That was kind of what I want, you know, I went through when I was younger I was World War two, you know, but then when I got older like once I turned like 13 14 Yeah, yeah, you know nom because also they put out apocalypse now Yeah, yeah, they put out full metal jacket They put out platoon all the those anti-war movies that to me were just a war for pro war Yeah, it did have a Have like kind of like a vibe Vietnam Oh, yeah, I'm being like with the even like with the rock and roll stuff and the whole you know the whole thing I'm just crazy water revival. Let's go. Did you know I know Told you this the drummer for clip for a credence clear water revival. It's named Doug Clifford by the way My family knows him. We know what? Yeah, bro. So yeah, we're first. We're just finding this out right now Yeah, bro, and this is how cuz my mom is a real estate person on Kauai. So he and this was like Was it in his heyday? We figured this was like 90s like early 90s and So he was a client of my mom's and she sold them a freaking house and stuff like that And they kind of hated it off or whatever he had kids that were our age, too And oh, yeah, we go to the house drinking and the whole like the whole deal. Yeah, yeah Doug Clifford I didn't know cuz I didn't know clear credence, you know like a little kid. Yeah He's like my mom's like, yeah, yeah, he's a drummer of this credence clear water my dad's like, oh, yeah He's like a famous person or whatever. I'm like, okay cool and they kind of look into it I was like, oh, yeah, it's cool old school, you know, cuz some classic cross scenario great band Oh, yeah, there was a cover band in my high school That covered credence and they were called the credence clear water revival revival So, you know, let's go. Oh, yeah, yeah, it was and but I knew some of the songs that they did I was like, oh, that's them You know that kind of what's the I see Yeah, yeah, no one but anyway, yeah, yeah, what's cool? That's all that that's all the Vietnam vibe Then and we you know, we elevate it, you know, I in my mind and then you know What what these guys went through was just absolutely I mean look at the one just in reading this guy's journal It's okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Hey, it's it's it's as glorified as it was You know into a young kid in my head, but you know as you learn more about it you realize these guys went you know went through such an atrocious combat and You know now we reflect on it and thank God, you know, I've had the opportunity I know when you meet the seals from Vietnam when I got to team one perk in the day It's like these were these were these guys were my heroes, you know, so Wild It's been so cool to learn so much more about Vietnam than I knew when I was younger Here's an anonymous 24 December sounds like Christmas Eve 1968 Also, if you remember he showed up. This was a year tour basically back in those days in Vietnam So he arrived just before Christmas. So he's getting towards the end of his tour Towards the night before Christmas and all through my bunker my buddies were snoozing a less than Sound slumber our stockings were hung to dry from the ceiling and Mosquitoes were biting the bites that were healing and I in fatigues and a pot on my head Was thinking of home and a warm cozy bed Went out to my flank in a cut field of fire I spotted some movement first low and then higher. I started to stare then remembered my training Night vision is better when the eyes are not straining as the object approached I was glad that the sound was not like the scream of an incoming round I gasped with surprise as the object grew nearer the image of Santa grew clearer and clearer Traditional suit and a beard flowing white. I shook Joe beside me to wish witness the site a Man and his reindeer a sleigh full of cheer just as we remembered from Christmas last year But spirits declined as he passed overhead We hoped he would land but he deeded instead There you go Christmas 1968 and there's a great I can't read the whole section But there is a great Section chapter in this book 25 December 1968 of him going out to deliver hot meals You know to all the different elements that are out in the field the chow chuck arrived from the mess hall We loaded it up the chopper warmed up the tailgate closed and we took off first stop was hill 200 a company up a tune from company B was on it We headed for hill 146 the Marines from company E hill 146 is about the same size as hill 200 except the area To land on is smaller hill 24 25 was next that would be company D It wasn't much larger than the last one, but at least the landing zone was down from the bunkers again We passed out the packages The chaplain spoke we climbed aboard our birds and took off for Bay Naa one mile in the air It was cool up there clouds all around wonderful be socked in at times bought by not Bay Naa is Socked in we can't get aircraft in for days one time We had a platoon up there for 21 days before the weather cleared to fly in today The clouds were closing in looks like we can make it an open spot and the birds started in we could see the Marines began To gather at the landing zone as we unloaded I got word from the pilot low on gas can't return for another takeoff Besides clouds are moving in the chaplain cut his greeting short and we boarded the aircraft We flew back to the lowlands to refuel at hill 55 one more stop dong den if we can get in Dong den was manned by company C Marines and looked like we might not get in no sunshine there too many clouds and Opening we went in nice try we touched down and we were off again We tried again Marines below guided us in over a little more down hold it. Okay, touchdown We were on the ground. I realized how small a spot the LZ is damn good pilot This would be a fast stop Unload a few words and we were off before the clouds closed in we swooped down fast under the clouds and then sunshine Made them all I shouted the pilot looked back and gave me a big grin and a thumbs up Before we left our LZ. He said we would make them all and we did Back to the area and a Christmas meal except for the patrols in the bush I'm finished playing Santa Claus this year, but it did make a Christmas worthwhile. So it was Christmas in Vietnam 1968 He ended up going home shortly after that Little piece here from the epilogue. It's been 20 years since these stories were first written Some are fresh in my mind as the day they happened while others are less remembered Each is a reminder a reminiscence of Vietnam 1968 Sometimes I still see the body of the young Marine Sergeant who's almost blown in half by an empty grenade by an enemy grenade and Staff Sergeant Hughes telling me they're gonna get us killed Sergeant Major Many names and faces have been forgotten over the years After three wars and 12 campaigns and over 33 years of military service I was retired from the Marine Corps on one May 1978 At the time I was Sergeant Major of the Fleet Marine Force Atlantic Norfolk, Virginia The formal ceremony for my relief in retirement was held on 26 April 1978 10 years from the date I noticed a small piece of bloodstained cloth being taken from the dead body of a young recon Marine And I want to close out the reading that I'm gonna do from this book From something that Sergeant Major John will include it in his book and it's it's actually something that he didn't write This was something that was published in Something called Sea Tiger, which was a weekly newspaper Published by the Marine Amphibious Force during the Vietnam War from 1965 to 1971 So this is to August 1968 The following letter was written by Marine Lance Corporal Donald E. Griss Company a Fifth Shore Party Battalion and printed in the Sea Tiger And here it is quote Just imagine Most of the guys over here are 18 and fighting to make it to 19 The average age of the combat soldier in many units here is 18 and a half and what a man he is a Pink-cheeked tussle-haired tight-muscled fellow who under normal Circumstances would be considered by society as half man and half boy not yet dry behind the heirs and a pain in the unemployment chart But here and now he is the beardless hope of free man He is for the most part unmarried and without material possessions Except possibly for an old car at home and a transistor radio here He listens to rock and roll and a hundred and five millimeter howitzers He's just out of school Received so-so grades played a little football and had a girl who promised to be true He has learned to drink beer because it is cold and it is the thing to do He is a private first-class a non-year veteran with one or possibly three years to go He never cared for work preferred waxing his own car to washing his father's but now He is working or fighting from dawn to dark even longer He can take a foxhole apply first aid to a wounded companion March until he is told to stop or stop until he is told to March He has stood among hills of bodies and he has helped to build those hills He is wept in private and in public and has not been ashamed of doing either Because his pals have fallen in battle and he has come close to joining them He has become self-sufficient. He has two pairs of fatigues washes one and wears the other He sometimes forgets to brush his teeth But not as rifle He keeps his socks dry and his canteens full he can cook his own meals fix his rips material or mental He will share his water with you or if you are thirsty Break his rations in half if you are hungry and split his ammunition if you are fighting for your life He can do the work of two civilians draw half the pay of one and yet find ironic humor in his all in it all He has learned to use his hands as a weapon and his weapon as his hands He can save a life or most assuredly take one He is now 19 a veteran and fighting to make it to 20 What a man There you go, what a man indeed out There Living like that Dying like that That's what That's what a man that can do That's what we can make ourselves, you know, there's One more thing that I found from Jack Johnnell That he wrote in on Memorial Day of 2003 and he this is a little bit of an expanded version you know, he mentioned that there was a sergeant that had asked him if he could go in the field and You know, he says Why do you want to go in the field and he already knew the answer but he asked him? You know, he wanted to be with his boys. He wanted to be he wanted to serve and He wrote a little bit more of a detailed account of that and he published it on Memorial Day Like I said in 2003 and it says quote during my service in Vietnam I was sergeant major of the first reconnaissance battalion first Marine division There was a young sergeant in our battalion who is the battalion police sergeant The battalion police sergeant was responsible for the cleanliness of the battalion area Other than what each company was responsible for It was the duty. He did not care for Often during the day, he would greet me with a cheerful high sergeant major and sometimes we would have a brief conversation One day he told me that he wanted to go to the bush on patrol and Asked if I would help him. I told him he had a good deal and he should take advantage of it Besides he was a good police sergeant However, I remember how I felt during World War two and wanted to get into the action and said I would help him If that's what he really wanted. I Informed the battalion adjutant that I was in favor of the sergeants returned to his company Besides there were some Marines that would like to stay out of the bush for a while a Few days later the sergeant knocked on the door of my hooch a wood frame with a tent over it And I told him to enter he wanted to tell me he was back with his company and was going on his first patrol I want to thank you sergeant major for helping me get back to my company We had a few more words and just before he left he turned and said thank you sergeant major The next time I saw that young sergeant was at the first medical battalion hospital graves registration He was on stretcher dirty pale and bloody There was a large hole from the top of his chest to his groin as if a giant spoon it scooped out his insides As I looked at his bloody body, I remembered his last words to me Thank you sergeant major Today I remember the words of that young sergeant And quote And Jack Johnnell died 8 April 2012 But he thankfully left us these memories and left us these lessons And let's make sure that we all remember these sacrifices That have been made and the opportunities that we have That's Yeah How about some how about some decompression echo Charles, what do you got for me? Yes, sir. Can you help me out over here? Yeah, sir Yeah, it so it's kind of Evaluating this whole situation and it kind of I keep getting reminded from with what you said in the beginning like where it just take Notes of or journal and you know like take notes of these things that happen, you know and it kind of If you apply it to this right where it's like yes, especially that end part and actually Kind of throughout the whole thing if he didn't do this a lot of this guy like this last guy like all these guys It's just it not even a memory. Yeah, just sort of just came and went and you know kind of nothing, you know Like man, it's like that applies to kind of everything that kind of goes on now over time, you know Yeah, you've really got to help your memory out You got to record stuff and you're gonna learn some so much from it. It's gonna make your life more valuable It's gonna help other people There was a this is kind of random, but it's not the movie seven your first movie seven Yeah, you gotta want so the agreement by the way, but he was like they were driving in the car some scene some transitional type scene and They're like hey, have you ever shot your weapon in you know in the line of duty or whatever? And he was like, oh, I only drew it once or whatever and he goes. What about you? He's like um I drew it once shot at once and he starts kind of telling the story and he was like the guy who that was with him or Whatever, he's like he got hit and it's like you could tell he was really trying to remember like remember the incident, you know He's like man spun him like a top and he was like what the hell was that guy's name? And he was like you could tell he was really like turmoiled by it and I remember thinking like that's a random scene, you know But it's kind of like oh, maybe it was that or me, you know Maybe that scene was meant to have more depth than maybe I interpret it at the time, you know, yeah like your memory You lose things. Yeah, even those heavy things, you know And then it's like yeah, he's trying to remember that guy's name because it's like significant You know like that dude he went in first took the hit, you know kind of thing It's like I don't remember his name kind of a thing, you know weird Yeah, you got it. You kind of know gotta take notes on what's happening. You know, it's a nice thing is Voice recording like voice memo. Yeah, and it's so much easier and by the way nowadays with voice to text, right? You can just like talk about what you did on this day. Boom. Put it out. Put out the word, you know You'll be able to look back and look There's a decent chance that 90% of it is like either you remembered it anyways or it doesn't really matter But man 10% of that stuff It's pretty legit. So my dad used to do that oddly Have a tape recorder like for real tapes tape recorder and I remember Me and my brothers will tease each other from time to time But oh well like, you know before bed or when we all just happen to be laying around or whatever You know, this is like the 80s. So it's like you just lay But um and he just be just blabbing to us, you know, like what's this, you know, you know, and I think it was my brother He told the story about we used to catch toads And when you'd see a mouse because a mice and toads are way different in many ways Obviously, but in this way where it's hard to catch a mouse easy to catch a toad, right? So we lifted up this board or he lifted up this board and because he saw a mouse go under there So he was like he did and he's telling this story as like a literally like a six-year-old kid And we're listening to it as like kind of young adults, you know, so it's like wow That's it's crazy how this thing happened in this detail and this it's all captured right there in this little old school You know orange cassette tapes on an infremer. They're like orange. Anyway, so he's like, yeah I lifted up the The board real quick and I reached for the mouse But I didn't grab the mouse because it escaped and I just grabbed the toad because when you lift up board There's toads under there too, you know So he just was telling the story about how he was trying to catch this freaking mouse, which is impossible And he grabbed the toad So we still tease each other but I was like, you know, you just grab it because he said in a certain tone as a little kid It's it's the whole thing But yeah, it's like and then man you can kind of make your mind go deep Inadvertently because it's like man, that's such that was an actual time that happened decades ago an actual time This person said these actual words, you know, and you were there, you know kind of a thing Otherwise and it would otherwise be just good. So many of those things were lost. Yeah Don't let that happen man, um write him down. I'm writing them down. Write him down. That's what we're doing Speaking of decompression. Yep. What other things can we do to decompress? Wow, you know, maybe some jiu-jitsu Maybe some lifting good training today. Good training today. It was it was it was good training Look, I sometimes you're the hammer. Sometimes you're the nail. I understand one of those days It's funny because you never say that phrase You don't never use that expression. Sometimes you're the hammer. Sometimes you're the nail when you're the hammer You never said It'd be weird too. Anyway, but nonetheless, it is funny. So let's just say you heard me say it Yeah, I'm here to tell you sometimes in the hammer sometimes you're the nail But a good session overall, you know, because I mean let's face it, you know, I trained very sporadically, you know over the past year or so whatever and Through that actually last time we trained was pretty solid too with everybody But um, it was like, you know, you get the opportunity to train with these guys really good Like kynan and all you know these guys So, yeah, I mean it was somewhat of an inoculation for sure a little a little something inoculation Did I use that wrong? What are you trying to? Yeah, doesn't really make sense Like to shock the system to get you back. Okay. I guess I don't think that's a true inoculation Maybe like it ain't Bro the funniest thing was when you got dubbed trading with kynan You sat against the wall and like you had a look on your face That was so funny and I said how you doing? Because you did not look like you were doing good No Here's the you want to know the kind of a little backstory So I'm sitting with jeff lover on the side right and I did I did three rounds Right and and we're usually we do five and for some reason when you're so used to over the years doing five rounds Now it's six minutes five minutes now. It's six minutes that extra minute is like It kind of can creep up on you. So anyway, I'm after the three rounds. Um, I'm like, all right I'm good and I was like probably gotta I gotta take a rest round, you know Which I didn't feel too bad because there was other guys doing it too So I'm like cool, but I'm sitting next to jeff lover and we're you know, we're talking or whatever and then kynan kynan sorry is um He was kind of coaching some people, you know and he looked like It looked like he maybe would have done the round, you know, but no one you know wanted to try So he was he was helping out, you know coaching or whatever So about halfway through the round, I'm like, ah, let me let me get some reps with him Just light hearted finish out the round no big deal kind of a thing So I tell I express this to jeff lover. He's like, yeah, bro. I'll do it do it. I'm like cool and I'm thinking in my head Even if I'm just getting straight a body slammed against the freaking concrete at least it's only for three minutes You seem zane. Yeah, it's not the full scene That was part of the thought process. So I go I asked my coach, you know, like you want to finish the round He's like, no, no, no, you rest we'll get the next one Just gotta defeat it. So I'm like cool But you know, I got a rest so I'm like whatever But it was like a thing so I go back to jeff and just he's just laughing because you know, we had the conversation before it And then yeah, then you saw, you know, we got some train. Look, let's just say I learned You know, we learned some good stuff and actually to be honest like you could tell Especially after the first little bit he was like, okay, like he was not like trying to kill me even though he almost did But it's it you could tell he was like kind of letting me work a little bit at least So which is the mark of a professional. Yeah, exactly. It's always good. Good training. Good training for sure And that is a good way to you know, like we got done training, you know, just like happiness. Yeah, you know, what's that like You for yeah, you for you before you're going on. So that's what we're doing with training when we got done training I had a hydrate I had a Mulk a cookie a Mulk protein cookie And I had a vanilla ready to drink And then I cracked open a go because I'm gonna be tired And that's that was my immediate Like fuel post training post training and by the way, I had a hydrate during training and also I had a go prior to training So I'm kind of just jockel fueled up to the gills right now But that's what you need man. You need good fuel. Hey check out jockel fuel dot com Get yourself some good fuel get yourself some protein ready to drink protein Get yourself energy clean energy like it's nice that you can you can have an energy drink and you don't Like sometimes if you take the wrong kind of energy drink for jiu-jitsu, you're going to die Like you're gonna freak you're gonna your heart's going through the roof. It's total chaos. It's crashing fall apart. It's a disaster Uh Jockel fuel go is just as good as it's gonna get the hydrate same thing Like just the perfect hydration and then get done with a little recovery hit that protein not to mention joint warfare I believe Is why I'm sitting here right now Just getting after it Join warfare superco check out jockel fuel dot com you can you can get it at jockel fuel dot com We're also in like retailers all over the country. So You go into your grocery store. You go into your uh, your supplement store. You go into your local gym You go into your grocery store. You should have jockel fuel there if you if you don't have it in there ask them We can get it your way, but we want you to have the clean fuel Jockel fuel check it out. Also, we're training In a full origin get up by the way, we're training nogi today And I was wearing a nogi rash guard from origin usa. I was wearing nogi shorts from origin usa The best the most comfortable totally totally good to go and Made 100 percent america I saw you noticed my rash guard today. Oh, yeah, you did have that custom rash kind of representing. That's that origin Yeah, the thing is origin can make some custom rash guards So if you are interested in that you can check it out, you know, if you have if you have an academy and you don't want to have communist rash guards You can get freedom rash guards. You know what i'm saying and on top of that jeans boots T-shirts hoodies Anything that you need jackets Just everything that you need origin usa.com made 100 percent america. We are rebuilding the manufacturing in this country Go to origin usa.com and get some it's true Also jockelstore.com Discipline equals freedom apparel and merch. Um, it's not it's not it's not like a like a giveaway Quality like this one. Oh, heaven. No what i'm wearing right now. Discipline equals freedom black on black Dude, when you get a giveaway shirt Yeah, yeah, no one's wearing that stuff. No, but he's wearing that stuff. Yeah, exactly, right But yeah, this is quality is for real stuff apparel. So you're saying but anyway, yes black on black Do you know how we did this? It's not some special process, but it was still deliberate. So you're saying because usually you can't see the stuff when it's black on black So you're saying but the black is almost has like a little bit of a shine to it a little bit. Yeah, not godly or tawdry not a Not not a gold plated. No, no, no, no, no, no, we're not doing that one, but it's black on black. It's good. So um, one of the reasons And people tell me this all the time too and I did some purpose one of the reasons is because sometimes let's say I go to Let's say it's a special night. I take my wife Maybe the kids whatever out to like a nice steak dinner, you know, but I want to go kind of cash, but kind of slick you seem sane I'm probably Probably not gonna use the big get after it shirt. You see I'm saying at the nice steak house I mean you can don't get it wrong do not get it wrong. I have There you go But if you're a little bit concerned about your look you seem sane you wear the black on black Doing you're not doing too much with that, you know that thing not too little either though You seem sane so you still can represent and look, you know stylish as well. Anyway, it's a thing And it's you know This is of these things these ideas and concepts are available to you as far as apparel goes on jocostore.com There's other stuff on there too, by the way Got some shorts on there By the way, all right hoodies all kinds of stuff. Anyway, also The shirt locker subscription scenario you already know We don't know but you're saying it anyways people seem to like it It's a new design every month. It's a good one a little bit outside the box more creative fun, you know a good one Oh, it's on the jocostore.com. Uh, also check out some books Put your legs on by rob jones. Dave Burke Need to lead check that out. I've written a bunch of books. You can check those out as well If you need leadership inside your organization, go to eslonfront.com if you need leadership For yourself, you can go to eslonfront.com or you can go to extremeownership.com And we can train you on the skills of leadership That's what we do. So check those out. Also, if you want to help service members active and retired You want to help their families you want to help go to star families check out mark lee's mom Mama lee she's got an amazing charity organization. If you want to donate or you want to get involved go to americasmightywarriors.org Also, check out heroesandhorses.org and jimmy mays organization beyond the brotherhood.org If you want to connect with us check out jocco.com and then on social media I'm at jocco willing echo zan echo charles. Just be careful because there's an algorithm on there and it's disgusting It'll trap you Without you knowing it. It's like sun sue. It'll you won't know that it trapped you, but it did So pay attention also, thanks to all americans past and present who put on the uniform To go and fight Especially those overseas right now in the middle east In harm's way. We thank you for your service and sacrifice and as I mentioned Our veterans that served in world war two in korea and vietnam world war one All those sacrifices that were made for us And we thank you all also. Thanks to our police law enforcement firefighters paramedics EMTs dispatchers correction all officers border patrol secret service as well as all other first responders Thank you for your service here on the home front And everyone else out there just remember That that young marine in that letter Uh, try and be like him Tight muscled working from dawn till dark often longer. He can dig a fox hole apply first aid March until he's told to stop or stop until he's told to march self-sufficient He can do the work of two with less pay and find ironic humor in it all And he's fighting He's fighting to make it to age 20 And he's not gonna stop So be like him and don't stop fighting And that's all I've got for tonight and until next time this is echo and jaco out