#655 - Sal Vulcano

I want to let you know that I'll be doing a podcast taping this podcast before a live audience. It's the only time I've ever done that. And it may be the only time I ever do. I don't know. But that will be with the champ, Iron Mike Tyson, on May 5th in Los Angeles at the Wiltern Theater as part of the Netflix as a joke fest. And after that, it'll be on our channel. So you can see it there. You can get tickets at TheoVon.com slash T-O-U-R. Today's guest is a stand-up comedian. He's a host. He's a podcaster. He's just a universal smile maker. You know him from his hit show, Impractical Jokers. And he's on tour doing stand-up right now. Always have a blast with the one and only, Mr. Sal Volcano. We start filming season 13 on Thursday. It's another thing. Wow. It's been on air for 15 years. And have you ever met a child that was conceived during the show? Has that ever been a thing? I know people met and got married. And I know people tell me they fuck to it all the time. Oh my god, really? I didn't think of that until one day I was standing outside. Am I getting a flat tire fix? I was standing on a sidewalk and a guy pulled up at a light. He rolled down the window and he's like, Sal, I love you, man. I was like, thanks, man. He goes, I was having sex with my girlfriend last night while the show was on. And I was like, oh, shit. I never really thought about that. So I went on to Instagram and I posted like, has anyone ever had sex while my show was on? It was like hundreds of thousands of people. You don't think of it. One time somebody sent me a porn of people and our show was on on the TV in the background. What? Not like a professional one. Oh, just amateur? Yeah. Oh, shit. Maybe one day you'll make the big news. Yeah, man. Hopefully we can show up on a browser one day. Maybe one day, bro. Oh my God, dude. And why do you think it is that y'all's show is one of those shows that's like, all right, you know, let's make a child of this or let's get a little, you know, let's do the Humpty. It's like background, you know, like you put it on anytime. You don't have to like follow anything. Just turn it on and it's good. Like playing in the background. They play it all day long. So it's just like one of those things. Like when I get to a hotel room, I turn something on and just like plays in the background. I think people are just people going to go about their business while it's on. You think that's it? I feel like so. I mean, I don't think it's intoxicating or anything. I don't think it's like like oysters. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Visual oysters. No, I do think there's something about y'all's show that it's like, it's the one thing like spouses could probably kind of agree on it. Yeah, we get that. Yeah. There's not a lot, you know, and you could have your kids are in there, you know, everybody could kind of agree on like, all right, we'll all kind of watch this. There's few shows like that now. Yeah. No, you yeah, there's like a Venn diagram where the kids and the parents both like it. And they they that's what we hear a lot too, which is like it's a show that everybody can be like, oh, I'll watch that. You know what I mean? I guess. There's a new little house on the prairie coming out. I think you and I have spoken about little house on the prairie before. Did we? Yeah, I think we did. Michael Landon, because you were a big fan, right? Oh yeah. Highway to Heaven. Oh, you're a Michael Landon fan or a prairie fan? The highway to Heaven and it needs to be repaved, brother. I'll say that. Yeah. I mean, they got, you know, what was it? Was he he was an angel that was like in purgatory and his guy's friend with the beard was another angel or that was his friend was like an Oakland A's fan. So yeah, but was he an angel to the friend or was he a civilian? No, his friend was a civilian and he could see Michael Landon. Yeah. And everybody could see him, but he came back and then he realized that Michael Landon is an angel. Bring, bring, bring, bring it up highway to heaven. What was the storyline on that? I haven't thought of that since the last time you and I spoke about it and the time before that was when I watched it. It's. Same thing. Why do we. Yeah, dude, I've thought about it, but I can't believe that you remembered that we had talked about it because I haven't talked about it with someone in since then. Yeah, that's why I remember it. I'm like, I just remembered you making me laugh about Highway to Heaven follows Jonathan Smith, Michael Landon, a probationary angel. You're right. And Mark Gordon and X cop as a travel America, helping people in need on behalf of the boss God, the series focuses on providing divine intervention, love and emotional support to individuals, individuals facing hardship. That's a pitch. That's such a funny pitch. It's like, OK, hear me out. An angel and an ex cop. That's really good. I'm like, I'm sold. Oh yeah. Michael Landon was one of a kind of man. That show was great. But yeah, we'd the highway to heaven. I think they put a dang toll. They put a toll booth on it now. It's like, yeah, you can't even, they couldn't remake something like this today. You don't know. Maybe I think now actually is when they probably can remake. Now I'm thinking about it. I mean, I think you need a good Christian drama. I think you need something that's leading. I mean, it'd be nice. I think if there were more influences towards faith, probably. But even even having a little house on the prairie back, it's going to be a vibe. Do you know what? So they're bringing back Highway to Heaven, a little house on the prairie. Little house in the prairie. Because what was that highway to heaven right there just now on the right? What's that? Oh, oh, they tried to bring it back, bro. I didn't even know. No one knew. Nobody knew. And they brought it back. It looks like with an African American actress, who was there? Barry Watson. Oh, Jill Scott. Jill Scott. Grammy Award winner Jill Scott and Barry Watson. Wow. That came and went. Oh, or is that coming out now? I'll give it a whirl. It's 2021. Oh, all right. Well, you can't. I mean, there's COVID times. Yeah, people and they were probably shipping people to heaven during COVID. We were the Highway to Heaven. It was COVID. It was a Pfizer four lane going on, bro. Fauci working the toll booth. She's getting the last dime out of you just to hit the turnpike. Was he working towards salvation? Michael Landon and I would have it. Like was he saving people to getting God's good graces? Like why was he probationary? Yeah, I would like to know how that series ended. Yeah, what was the last I've gone to heaven? If he didn't, I mean, it would have been a huge letdown, though. No, I mean, imagine he just did. Imagine they just left it open like they don't even tell us. Yeah, let's go to the ending of it. The series, Highway to Heaven did not have a planned definitive series finale as it was canceled due to low rating. Oh, shit. Wow. So they didn't. That's always a bummer when you invest in a show and then just stops. And you're like, that's that's that's that's hard. Or when the whole nation invests in a show too, and it ends like a lost lost killed lost probably, I think there's people that died because loss wasn't. It didn't do anything. Yeah, there had to be some type of butterfly effect. Was that it was like it was their hope. I'm going to keep watching this and it's going to get some. I was me. That was me. You watch loss and at one point I thought loss was the greatest show I had ever seen in my life. And then the last two or three seasons, it was like maddening. Yeah. I mean, it was that broke a lot of people. It's too convoluted. Oh, people with divorces. I mean, that broke. People don't realize that if you invest that much with somebody into something and if that thing falls apart, you might you can fall apart. You can fall. You can unravel. Your whole life can unravel. Yeah, doesn't take much these days. Yeah, it doesn't. Everyone's right there. All it takes is like just the creators of losses string us along, telling us the whole time they have exact intentions when they fucking don't. And it comes out later. I don't know if anyone's ever taken them to task for that. I'll tell you another thing. I saw the finale. I couldn't tell you what I can't explain to you right now. Yeah. Yeah, you can't even explain the ending. You did all that and you couldn't explain the ending to us. Evangeline Lilly. God bless her really. She's doing fine, I'm sure. Yeah, she's like and she's like an ant man. Right. She's like ant woman. Oh, she is. I think so. I didn't know. Yeah. That show was so good, dude. Flashbacks, the flash sideways. Flash forwards, flash sideways. They started flashing sideways. I'm like, what is that? I've never seen a flash sideways before lost. Yeah. Yeah. How do you flash sideways? They did it. Yeah, they did it. I'd like to flash sideways. Oh, I need to talk to you. I'd like to flash sideways today. Yeah, you're doing you said you're in town. You hitting the doctor? You're on the you're hitting the medical circuit right now. Yeah, I'm hitting the medical circuit. My doctor lives out here. My boy from high school. Really? He's my primary. And it's your friend from high school? Yeah, it's my boy from I've known him since he was 13. Wow. Yeah, so shout out James Loesch. James Loesch? James Loesch? I don't know if I want to go to my friend and let him, but I guess if it's your boy, you can trust him with anything. Yeah, that's where it started out of. And you can show him your body and whatever? No, I haven't shown him my body and that would be where I probably that's. I understand what you're saying. And right there is where I thought I would have to do it this week. Showing my body because these like we had a list of things to do. I got like what's called a dexa scan, a CT angiogram. I got a blood draw for a full panel plus a cancer screening. I got an MRI today. I'm doing everything. And then I said in there, what is that? It said in there, that's him, huh? That's me. Oh, yes. That's him. That's you again. He pulled him up in a tux at 18 years old. Dude, every time you hear, we bring up pictures of guys that I cannot even believe it's you and it's you every time. No, I, it said physical. So I was going to, at one point I was like, you don't have to like, you don't have to hold my sack or anything. Do you? Yeah. But then I just let it go and then he didn't say anything. And then it was, it was fine. But do you think you're missing out on some that's important information or something? Just because you guys are like kind of shy or whatever. I was, I was wondering if, if in general, like when was the last time you got a physical, a physical, uh, you had to do it for the movie or something like that. Maybe. I mean, I wouldn't bet it. Probably wasn't too long ago, but I've gotten all the blood panels. I get them done all the time. Yeah. Yeah. So I just don't know if that's antiquated, like then like holding you and saying, call for a drop. Yeah. I don't, I don't really hear people talk about that anymore. Yeah. Hold them in. Yeah. Call your stepfather a queer or whatever. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. That's not, yeah. It's not, I mean, it's not a medical term. They're taking liberties. Yeah, they're taking liberties. You're like, I hope they. I was like cough, but call my dad a queer. Trust me, just do it. It's like, yeah, it'll release some stress. You're like, okay. I don't know what they're looking for, but if he didn't touch my balls, then I guess like he's not going to find anything there. Yeah. So like, I guess that was an oversight. But I guess what are they checking for when they hold your balls like a hernia? Well, I mean, look, I think it on that. I don't lift anything on. I got a bad back. Doctor says I can't even lift my balls. Oh, let's check it right now. Yes, it is standard medical procedure for a doctor to hold the scrotum whilst asking you to cough and check for it. And I get that, but that shit seems hella. It seemed like the Catholic church is involved in it a little bit. It has a little back splash of uncertainty. But what? Oh, how do we self check our own balls? That's what I would look up. Yeah, maybe a self exam I could do. Because there's probably time, man, that we know how to do this just because there's a lot of times I'm sitting in a lobby or I'm chilling, you know? Yeah. And then you don't know what's going on down there. Well, it's like I might as well check it out. Yeah. Oh, yeah, we could check all the time. Yeah. If we know what we're doing, we're we're we're checking without knowing usually. Yeah, usually I'm feeling around my balls. Like, what is that? Don't touch that. There's like that part there. It's like, yeah, it's the thing attached to the ball. That's like weird. Yeah. Yeah. Like, oh, that's the HVAC area. It's all wide. Yeah. Yeah, I'm not certified like, you know, in her bag. I don't really know anything in the bag. There's definitely, dude. Yeah, there's moments where you're like, oh, what is that? That's what gets scary, bro. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, like, oh, that just feels like it's like feels like oh, that's just a skittle or something. I still won't go. I still won't go if I feel like I have a taste like a rainbow in like if I skittle in there or something, I would just be like I would sooner Google it. There's something I just I'm not really he would have had to probably take his balls out for me to feel comfortable. Oh, that's fair. Yeah. Dude, that should be something you guys do for the show for like one of the things. We will do that. Get him into that center. You know, I got my doctor in there and show his balls on our show. It makes sense. We're just, you know, now with the doctors, got to do, you know, get him to, you know, I need you to hold your ball while you hold my balls. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? And we sing a little bit of Bruno Mars, you know. Yeah, Bruno's good, man. I did it remind you. You had a story about Bruno. Remember, he went to his show. Yeah. Yeah. He was he was dope. He was like it was a bit back, but he was like bartender for us backstage. And then during this finale, he was like yelling out quotes from my show. Like in the middle of like, you make me feel like I'm locked out of here. And he just starts and then there's pyrotechnics. And then he just started screaming out lines from the show. And I was like, I can't believe this. I actually missed it. I was like with people and and like I didn't hear him say it. And they were freaking out. I think if I told this last time, but I was like, I remember like I was like four or five people, I was with my girl and the guys and and they went nuts. And I thought they were just going nuts for the song lock. And I was like, wow, they're really big fans. Like that's like they were like overhyped, you know, obviously, they just heard him quoting us. So they were reacting like that. And I was like, this song's good, but I like they're really into it. And then like a few minutes later, like, I can't believe he he's he's. Shout out to you. You was getting something. No, I was right there with him, but I didn't hear like there was fireworks going off and I didn't hear it. And then I was like, and then they were like, I can't believe he was quoted you. I'm like, you're quoting me. You didn't even know you're right there. Is this real? That's real. You could pull off. It looks it looks like AI, right? That's real. You could pull off a hat like that. There's Bruno Mars. I could never pull off that like that. Never. Joe and Sal came down to the show in Albany tonight. Albany. Oh, it's Albany. Albany. Albany, sorry. And if you ain't seen the show in practical jokes, you're missing out. Apparent, apparently. Apparently. Apparently, Mer was there. Yeah, Mer got there late and and after it was over, he got stuck in traffic and he like drove eight hours and missed it. I swear to God. He drove. I'm not I'm not. I know he might honestly, honestly, I think he drove like 13 hours. I don't know why I forgot the circumstances surrounding it, but he got there late and just missed the whole thing. Damn, dude. I couldn't wear a hat like that. Yeah, I couldn't wear a hat like that. I wouldn't be able to do it good. So we don't forget this because I do think is important. What can we do to check out our nuts to make sure that we're OK? What do we do, actually? This first. Using both hands. And I'll just you just cut my waist. Don't do me lower than the waist. I'm going to check while we're here. I can't see it, but I'll. OK, tell me maybe you give me a play by play. All right. Like, what do you feel? What do you feel for right now? What is it? I don't know. I think I feel like I'm in like the cottage cheese section. Well, ultimately, though, what are you? What are you looking for? Are you looking for a hernia? Are you looking for a skittle? Like, what are you looking for? Looking for cancer. Oh, that's what we're doing. That's like that's cancer. What are you doing cancer screening? Yeah, I'm not going to waste my time. This is for you. I'm not screen for everything if you're feeling around. Just do a full thing screen for everything. Dude, I can't do a full panel or whatever. You can do it. Can you tell the difference between a hernia and cancer? I know. I will say like it is weird with both hands on your balls while I'm talking to you. I agree. Yeah. Normally, it would be when we first met. Well, if you would give me a second, I'm trying to see if I have cancer. OK, what is this? What is this? What is this animation, though? What is why is it no sack? I don't know. That's Dick's are, I think. Oh, the cheek joke, but thank you for supporting. That was good, man. Take me just getting on the wording again. One more time. Go back. Perform a testicular self exam monthly. Oh, God, I am. I am 400 months behind schedule. Yeah. Ideally during or after a warm shower when a scrotum is relaxed. Yeah, you know, if you got that hard bag, bro. Yeah, you can't do it in like the winter. Yeah, if you feel like it's like kind of like a feels like a bit of like a really ripe avocado, you got to back off the sack. Yeah, that's right. Using both hands, gently roll each testicle between your thumb and finger to check for hard lumps, smooth bumps. That's a unique term. That's got to be an oxymoron smooth bumps. How can you find that? That's crazy. What's a smooth bump? Isn't, by definition, a bump not smooth. Hard lumps, smooth bumps, the Ovan story. My journey through chemotherapy or changes in size, shape or consistency. What do they mean changes in size? Like it's like a, I guess if one's gotten really like one sounds like it, like it's throats clogged or whatever. Oh, there's always one bigger than the other. Isn't there? Is that breasts? Isn't that true? Balls and breasts. There's always one that's bigger. Yeah, I think that's true. I'm going to read this one part off and then we'll get to that. Hard pea sized lumps or nodules, a new dull acre feeling of heaviness in the lower abdomen or groin. So that I think is more for hernia and then significant swelling or sudden change in size. So I guess the good thing is if you do it repeatedly, you'll start to, that's the thing you probably have to do it repeatedly. So you get an idea. You catch it. Yes. You have a baseline baseline. Because otherwise, if you just wandering into your nuts with your hands or whatever, everything in there, you don't know what's in there at all. Yeah. No, neither testicle nor breasts are always perfectly symmetrical. One side is typically slightly larger position differently in most people. Hmm. And the testicles usually hang at different levels. That gives them also the illusion of seeming like they're different sized. It'd be funny if we didn't have a sack and they just hung the ball like in that, like how that hand was holding the two individual testicles. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That would be weird. That'd be very weird. Just like hung like on a string, like on strings. Just like a bangers. Like, yeah. Like those, those kabangers. Yeah. When we were little, like it was like two balls on strings and you were like, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop. And they were like, they were called kabangers. Bring them up to them. Kabangers, bro. Yeah. Get those kabangers up there. You don't remember those? I've never seen those in my life. What, bro? They still sell them now. But I promise you. We're, man, dude, I'm so sorry because like I had some really nice times with those. With them kabangers. Yeah. Like when you get, when you, when you know what you're doing, you can see a video of somebody doing it. When you know what you're doing, it's, it's a real treat. Oh, here's a video of commercial form. Smitties. Heel or Shatter. Get the original kabangers at Smitties and get set for some fast action. Oh, you're not good. Fricking toot. You're not getting neighbors nuts off of that. They were like little like nunchucks. Oh, I did used to wish that like your nuts had like a, they were like secret hearing device or whatever. Like you could throw one somewhere into a room and it would be able to hear. It's dope. What was going on? That's really good. Like a recon nut or whatever. Like a James Bond nut. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's good. There's the, you know, the sack is a good place to hide something. Oh, yeah. You know, if you can get like some type of surgery, where you get like a, it's almost like a, you remember what? You remember what they call ruse, kangaroos, the sneaker? Ruse. Yeah. Remember? Yeah. And so the thing about kangaroos or ruse, I think, is every single sneaker had a hidden pocket on it. Oh, that's right. Like in the tongue or on the side. And they should bring those back, you know, but that'd be like you can do that with your pouch, like with the sack. And then you could hide stuff in there. Yeah. Well, I bet you could get that modulated, bro. If you got your nuts modulated, bro, you could do that in a fucking heartbeat. Oh, yeah. Get you a little side, get you a little pouch almost or get like almost like a little fanny pack on it. Yeah. They should make a little fanny pack that goes around you. I was at when this is not a bad idea if we could find a safe medical way to do it. Because you ever throw on like a pair of sweats and there's no pockets and you leave the house and you got no pockets. When you have no pockets, I feel like I might have to go back like I will not buy pants without a proper pocket. Like, you know what I mean? Yeah. Well, of course, I know what you mean. Yeah. And then and then and then but if you had a sack that held stuff like a pouch, you feel like you wouldn't have to think about it. And you could throw on any pants you want. You could flippantly throw on pants before you leave the house. Not even think twice about it. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. If you're like, oh, I just, yeah, I got enough room for us to set a couple of zans. You could put like your license in there. A key. Key fob. I think you're putting your license in your nuts as crazy work, bro. Yeah, you're right. But the whole concept is so you could have gave me it. Just, you know, we just try. I mean, I don't think we'll put anything in there really. But here's the thing. If I don't you're going to put a zin in it. Two zins, I think you could put. Oh, I would. I would be careful putting two zins in there. That's the tobacco. Yeah. You are took it to another level. Now you're going to get bull cancer. That's true. All I'm doing is trying to have identification on me. Yeah, you're right. You're right, man. I'm really going to kind of like my separate way. But also, I didn't ever got that enhanced license for travel. So now, just in case, I always got to bring my passport with me to the airport. And I'm always afraid I'm going to forget it at home and then it's going to be lights out because I can't get on a thing. So I would put my maybe my path. I would you have to fold it up. It might be on console, but I would maybe permanently carry my passport in my sack. But you can't do. Think about this, though, Sal. I hear you and I love what you're saying, but you're right. To fold your fucking passport. Yeah, I know it's too much. I couldn't do it. It's not it's not built to be folded. But here's what I do think is, yeah, if you had your nuts or whatever. Yeah, if you could put two, trying to give you a couple of couples in and your nuts or whatever, a couple of Alps in there. You do the zoning. I don't do it. I mean, but I think it would be crazy if they're like, yeah, we we think you have like gum cancer and you know, like you'll get like tooth and gum. Like somehow you got mouth. You got gingivitis of the balls. Somehow you got mouth cancer. Yeah, because I've been fucking zen in through my magical nut pouch. But dude, the the no two nuts are the same. You know that no two nuts acts of the snowflakes. Yeah, yeah, pretty cool. You know what time it is, you know what time it is. Prize picks. America's number one sports picks app. The app is really easy to use. That's why I like it. To get started, you just pick more or less on two plus players stat projections and lock in your picks. That's it. It's simple. And with the NBA playoffs here, there's no better time to get in on the action. Prize picks is now an official daily fantasy partner of the NBA. And that kicks off with a NBA finals sweepstakes. 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And once people saw the news and bro, we watched it first, we were like, whatever, bro, let's don't look too long because it's just me and him and we're not with anybody or whatever. Well, but it was just you, you mean like there was like a competition or like a dance party or something? Yeah, it's just a dance party. They had over there by the lake. It's over there by Centennial Park in Nashville. You can probably even look it up. And so they have just like a lot of Latinos and a couple of like Indian guys trying to pretend they were Mexican or whatever, like putting on like. Yeah, but they have their own really good dance routines too. You ever see them? They go, they go hard. Yeah. Like those, they, those like, like those routines where everyone's doing the same thing, they say choreographed. It's like, she's all that. It's like she's all that. Is it like that? I feel like the Indian weddings I've seen in passing on like YouTube or like in the Instagram and you see them dance and like they all like know the exact. That's so cool. That's my dream. That is cool, huh? I feel like a dance to bust out and everyone does it together. Yeah. You know, dude, that's a good, yeah, man. Yeah, I went out dancing last night. You went out dancing last night. I felt like my mom in the 80s. You're lying. I swear to you, I went out dancing. You felt like your mom. I love to dance. You wore a brooch. No, but I do love a brooch. Me too. I got my wife a brooch recently. You did? I swear to God. Yeah. That's all. I love it. So brooches, they're just wonderful. I think they're like they did not. And I don't know if they're really in style anymore, but they're timeless. Brooches. Yeah. Yeah. I think when you see someone the brooch, you think, well, sometimes you think like there's somebody past when there's like a little image of a minute, right? Sometimes like a lock. Something like that. Yeah. Yeah. But sometimes it's just decorative. Yes. Yeah. You think this one, they're almost like it feels like a little bit of royal tea, like neighborhood royalty. I like it. Yeah. It does feel like something like a little bit of like a like a like a badge. Yes. Yeah. Right. That's what it is. Oh yeah. They got some great brooches. There's a place here called the five spot is a bar and on Mondays they have Motown Mondays and that's all I need to hear. Yeah. I love it. It was it was like soul music, Motown music. And we went last night. It was one of my friend's birthdays. We went and I was like, I don't go out because you know, I, you know, at home, I'm just working in the kids and stuff. So I was like, let's go, let's go. Dude, I dance for like a good couple of hours last night. I don't remember the last time I did that. Probably I got a wedding or something, but I was like in the wild dancing. No way. Yeah. Dude, that's so fun. And everybody was just dancing and having fun. Everybody. Yeah. The place wasn't that crowded and every last person there was dancing. Get down on it. They play stuff like that. So am I cool in the gang? Yeah. Come on, babe. I love it. Yeah. It's hard to get down. That song comes on by cool in the gang. I have to dance. Yeah. I don't know about you. So you don't dance. Oh, you know what? Here's the thing. I just forget about it. You know, I think if I had a dance, like someone like I wouldn't mind having a date and we go to the. Square dancing. There is a Tuesday night place here that does square dance. I don't think it's American Legion or something where they teach you how to square dance. My friend Chris just went last week and I'm line dancing like that. Yes. Yeah. So I would like to learn that. Yeah. And then that's a nice entry point. Yeah. And just a couple of two steps get you feeling like you're part of the group. Yes. To get me out on the dance floor. I used to love to dance. Now sometimes I think I feel a little bit like sometimes I have some social anxiety about that. Sure. It's hard to dance now. If people are like, yeah, you can't just let loose. Yeah. I'm honestly, I'm afraid. Yes. Somebody will video me and probably make fun of me, which is fair. I'm okay. I have to make fun of you. Yeah. Okay. But just doing it like, oh, like there's some part of it I don't like. And I think it's just that, uh, I don't know. I hear the thing. I don't want to see a video of how bad I'm dancing because I want to still believe in my head that I'm a good dancer. Sure. Sure. Sure. That's what it is. Yeah. But don't take that ability away from me by like using me to fucking just to burn me one. I would love to watch you sincerely dance. Okay. You know, okay. You know, I would just love to see you like genuinely dancing. Okay. I see what that looks like. Okay. You know, what your rhythm is, what your moves are, like how you get down. I think a lot of like that. Oh, when the blues are come on, bro, I get out there and dance. To the blues. Yeah. They used to have a place called Tabby's Blues box over there in downtown Baton Rouge, bro, and I'd get out there, bro. And they had a little bit of sliced ham or something over there on the side, you know, they look like they put out a little like, uh, a little like, oh, you can eat like type of thing or something. It was like, it wasn't all you could eat, but it was like, you can eat a little. Yeah. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like I had that food, people would dance to the blues and eat ham. They had a dude sitting by it. So, you know, you couldn't have that much. Oh, so it was like, he served it. He like, you like, like, like when you get up at a wedding at a buffet, like and they slice it for you like that. Oh yeah. Like that. No, no, no. The ham steak. No, this was just kind of regular ham. Not like, no, like deli ham. No, I was like, it was like a few stairs up from deli ham. So somewhere between deli ham and ham steak. Yeah. Like neighborhood hammer or whatever. Or like ham that had been kind of trucked in it, had been flown in. Okay. But it had come on a truck. But how do they prepare it? Like what's on like a glaze? Now they could just cook. I think they cooked it. Just cooked ham. Yeah. And then, and then the blues, yeah, while the blues and they had some crackers out there, they just had a little setup, but they had a dude you could tell you couldn't have a lot because that a dude sitting by it. Like we're going to pay this dude to sit by it. Yeah, because that's unfortunately what happens in society. You just have unchecked ham. It's going to be like a black Friday situation. And now you ever see when they give the tote bags a tray to Joe's, people just become animals. Yeah. You can't. Ham. People already said listening to the blues. You can't just put out hand. They're going to run for that to comfort food. Oh, bro. Yeah. It was one, one song was so sad. I had a mouth full of fucking ham. It's hard to cry when your mouth's full. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah. You'll remember being a kid. You can't cry and chew. Yeah. You couldn't. Yeah. You can't cry and chew. You can't. You can't cry and eat. It's a fact. It was a fat boys dilemma. You really can't though. That's why you can't be sad and chubby, dude, because that's the dilemma that God sets you in. Like you're going to be able to have as much low ham as you want, but you ain't going to be able to be sad about it. Yeah. That's why people eat to stop crying. Oh, dude. Yes. Why is it that should be written on our American flag. Think about something like a, what a huge hoagie hysterically crying and eating it. I've never seen it. It's a, it's a, it's a visual I've never seen. People can't cry and eat at the same time. Yeah. All right. It's like sneezing and, uh, or it's like, uh, yeah. Right. Whatever it's called, like, sneezing and like wishing for something. Yes. And I thought it was something with sneezing. It's like rubbing your belly and like chewing gum. No. And, uh, and patting your head flirting with your neighbor's wife or something. Yeah. Yeah. You can't do it all. Yeah. It's like, yeah. Patting your head, rubbing your belly and checking your balls for cancer. Yeah. You cannot do that. I'm sorry. Um, I went out. I went out. Thank you, bro. Oh, thank you for making me laugh today. I appreciate it. Of course. And I appreciate it. You're welcome. I'm going to ask you, so you, because your podcasting has changed recently and I wanted to talk about this. I wanted to know why, because you had two podcasts. You had one that you got, you were doing with Chris DeStefano. Yes. Hey, babe. Hey, babe. And then you had your own. I had one with Joe DeRosa called taste buds. And yeah, I want Joe DeRosa called taste buds. And Joe moved to Austin. Yes, he did. So that kind of brought that one to an end. Yeah. And Chris moved up like state or whatever, but. Oh, he's living upstate. Yeah. But I've, I'm telling you, cause we, when we put these on hiatus, we said to the fans, like they're just going on hiatus. It's been a couple of years now, but people think we, like we lied. We had no intentions of a, we have full intentions of bringing them both back. No joke. Like I talked to both of them, both of them recently at Chris, texted me two days ago and said, you want to do like a short run of them just to put it back out there. And I'm like, yeah. And I talked to Joe, he said the same. So we really are going to bring it back. But I got a new talk show like pod coming out called manouche, which is like short from a new show. And it's like big guest, small talk, but it's like, it's like absurd. It's like, uh, it goes in and out of conversation and sketch comedy. It's like something just completely different. Yeah. Like it's, uh, it's, it's off the wall. It's really fun. I shot like 10 episodes so far. Oh, you already did. Yeah. I shot that I'm going to do them by seasons, like 10 episodes seasons. So I'm going to release it like probably sometime in May and then kick it off. It's, it's been so much fun. Do you got to, I talked to you about, you got to come on. Yeah. I want to come in. I'm going to come through, you know, I'm going to come and do one. Please. I'd love to have you. We will have a lot of love to be on there. It's really different. Like it's not just, you know, it's, well, yeah, that's what I'm curious about. So like, yeah, cause you're saying like it also involves improv. So what, like, how does that kind of look or a little bit of like, we're like, it's like nothing to is that we do and say is to be taken seriously. It's all just we're doing shtick the whole time. And we're like, we're in on the joke and it's like, but it's edited really fun. It's like edited in like little chunks and it's like, it's a look like it's on an old VHS tape. It's like, it's, it's really, I don't know. It's just something I just made up like a couple of years ago when we went on hiatus, I'm like, I want to do something completely like solo that has like a really specific sensibility to it. So it doesn't, I mean, this isn't a great pitch. It doesn't sound funny, but you know, it's really, it hasn't really. It's unique. I'm super excited. What do you do a lot? I mean, those are your wheel houses, you know, comedy and improv. And so to have some of that together, I think it definitely makes sense. How was, I mean, it sounds cool. You, if you've talked about this enough, no problem. But like, how was your experience filming the movie and stuff that you guys improvised a lot on that? I think I didn't know exactly what was going on with you. Like bro, until the day we showed up there on set, it's got me nerve wracking, right? I thought it was all emails. So the day we showed up on set, I was like, no way. Everybody was being real serious about this. And it was a real movie. There's like people walking around. There's like one guy just looking for something. You know, there's like some guys like dressing somebody up like in a, you know, um, outfit or whatever. You know, it's like, we need, you had the full trailer, like all that shit. Oh, everything is like electrical lines. It's like, don't, you know, and people, you like, you, you funded it too. Like you guys made it yourself and funded it and everything. So isn't that like, how like nerve wracking was that to like be like, all right, whether we're going to, this is going to do well, getting, are going to invest it back. But even the fact that you've never done that before, and then to walk in on a production net, like that size and then be at the like the person running it. Basically. That's a good question, dude. I think honestly, like I kind of struggled with like that, you know, I want to be in like, you know, I'm very particular about what I put out in a way. Like I just, I wanted to try and be true to myself. However. Right. And it wasn't like bad or anything. It was just different, right? And I had, and I, and I, and going back, I wish in some places I wish I would have spoke up more and in some places I wish I would have spoke up less. It's going to be a learning experience. We made the one movie and it was a learning experience for me. Like I didn't like a lot. There's a lot of things I would change. You have to do it. But did a lot of people go see your movie? Yeah. Yeah. It was out when COVID hit. We were in theaters when the world shut down. So we were expanding because like we were doing that. We had a great Perth theater average. So they didn't give us a wide, wide roll out, but we were, uh, we were the highest Perth theater average. So it kept expanding week over week. So we were heading into our fifth week. They were going to give us like a few more weeks and then it shut down. Yeah. It's kind of a nuts. But yeah, I don't have a ton of ego in it. I think it was awesome. I learned so much. Did you have nerves like every day or did they go away? No, I just. Cause I would just be like, did I have nerves? Like what? For sure. Some scenes I did, some scenes I just got to be David's. I'm like the ball. I'm like, say if somebody's bouncing a ball off a wall, I'm kind of the wall, right? Sure. Sure. And then it kind of over time, it changed a little bit where I'm like, sometimes I'm catching the ball and throw it back. Yeah. So I think it was just moments of confidence. Um, when my confidence would feel okay. Yeah. Yeah. And, uh, and learning as I went, but I, I mean, I'd take an act class over the years. I've done a lot of practice scenes and shit, but in the end, you just want to have fun with your buddy and you want to come up with what's funny. So we'd be sitting there improving a lot, like throwing ideas at Spade. We like, we'll try this one. And then sometimes you want to hold your idea because you don't want to tell him cause you want to say it in real time. So it's actually funny. Yeah. But a lot of that. Yeah. But looking back, I think there's so many just little moments like just seeing like Spade, like just trying to stay warm because we had a day like we were supposed to shoot during the code, during the, um, fires, the shit fucking, you know, dude, whoever it was, somebody that Spencer Pratt hates, tried to burn down the palace. And while all that shit was happening, you know, our movie was supposed to shoot. But once you've already paid and got shit locked in, you're kind of locked in. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. And so we, like one day there was like 60 mile per hour winds and we didn't need wind in the movie or whatever. Right. Right. Right. You have to, it has to be in it. We can't afford to redo. So, you know, it's like, yeah, this day costs 60 miles out of it. It's 60 miles out of it. It is seen of you guys like in the park and is a tornado for no reason. Like you do you do make mention of it in the movie or is it just like whipping wins? Oh, there's just whipping wins. This one day at this gas station, um, the guy, uh, Stevie Janouski, Steve Little, he's from, uh, Eastbound and down. Oh God, dude. He is the funniest guy. He is. I mean that character, the, the, the outtakes from Eastbound and down are the, I think probably the greatest thing ever, ever on record. You, you worked with him. How is he in real life? Oh dude. I mean, it's literally like the nicest guy. He's so funny. It's all like, for somebody that has such an effect, like being funny, it's almost like he doesn't want to have too much of an effect in any other way. Not in, he just, he's a gentle guy. That's what I mean. Okay. He's a gentle guy. He doesn't, he's not trying to stir the pot or anything, but you put him right there in the middle of the porch and cut those lights on and dang. It's, it's, he made, he had you laughing. It's a beautiful soup. That's awesome. Yeah. Just little things like that, I think, and looking back and like, um, so the, the fires delayed you? No, we just had him like move a little bit over this hill, you know, and I'm like, we'll probably be safe over this hill or whatever. And I'm like, that sounds. Oh, it was like during. Well, yeah. Yeah. That's, oh yeah. It was during them. Oh my God, dude. No, when you're like, it's like it was spreading across town. Like, yeah, there'd be times you'd be going across. Yeah. And you'd see just, oh my God, you'd see a bird fly by and he was on fire. Whatever you like to stop, bro. He's like, I got to get somewhere. You know, he's like my wife's pissed or whatever. You're like, all right, just do it. Oh man. But yeah, I didn't even think to say that. Yeah. The fires are going on. So there'd be days you're driving home and shit's just, oh, fire everywhere. That's messed up. It was crazy. We had to have the executive produce this show that started that came out this week. Actually, it's called foul play with Anthony Davis, a D NBA player. Oh yeah. He played for the Pelicans. He played in New Orleans. He's in the. He I was I think he's on Dallas now. I got traded from the Lakers. Are you playing? Yeah. I think so. But but so he has this show. It's like it's like a punk. They must sign it started less. We had to pull up. We had to pull a bit from the first episode, 16 episodes. It just and it rated it just aired. It rated like the highest new series on on TBS in like years. But so we had this thing where Floyd Mayweather was the guest and he was helping us do this like prank on this person. So this family lost their house in a fire. This was before the fires. OK. Family like the setup was that this family lost their house in a fire and Floyd Mayweather held this charity barbecue for them to get like like with the community to get like their belongings back. So people brought them like gifts and that's beautiful. They got all their like their housewares and front things back. And like people are donating this stuff at the barbecue at the charity barbecue. And then they all their stuff catches fire from the barbecue and burns again. So like they just lost. I feel like I almost saw this dude. It was the funniest thing ever. And Floyd Floyd Mayweather is in on it. But then when then the fires happened and like we're like we can't you can't put this in. It's like it's too insensitive. So they pulled it. But it was like it was supposed to be the first episode was really funny. But and Drey Mon Green was there. Yeah. He was in another one. He's always fighting. He's always hitting white dudes all the time. Is he. I don't know. He used to be anyway. He might have gotten healed or what. I might have gotten saved. Well yeah. I haven't I haven't heard it much about him hitting hitting. He was just hitting whites or off whites or whatever. You know he's hitting like mixed dudes. It was like it was like mixed and down. You know it just seemed like a lot of times he wouldn't crack like a real solid black dude. I will say that bro. And respect him. He's a champion. And he whooped my ass. But he definitely punched mixed and down. But dude that's so cool. What's Anthony Davis like. Does he have a big personality. Yeah he's dope. He's really fun. He the reason we end up doing this because he was a guest on our show and we did a bunch of stuff with them. And then he was like I love this. He's like I love this more than basketball. He's like this is what I really want to do. It's what he got. He's like I this is what this is where I really wish I could do. And we're like why don't we develop something together. And then we did and got picked up foul play foul play. That's awesome. So people can watch this on TBS. Yeah it's on every week now. Dude that's great bro. I'll share something about it as soon as our show is over. Yeah yeah. Dude we got that. We got and I told you we got I start filming jokers again in two days season 13. Crazy. So minutia is the podcast. Yeah podcast improv show. I think it's like a talk show. OK. Yeah it's a talk show and that's just gonna be on YouTube. Yeah. Well we're gonna pitch it. We're gonna you know try to sell it but you know YouTube's great. Yeah yeah yeah. We're doing YouTube. And you should be like just on YouTube and now you're like if it's if better be on YouTube. Yeah yeah for sure. Yeah yeah yeah. Dude yeah that's great. You're staying so busy. Do you feel kind of overwhelmed. Yeah yeah I haven't I had another kid since I saw you last. Ah do you remember last time. Yeah man yeah. You know I did. I get talked to so much about about my appearance on here last time and the clip of me talking about my daughter. Oh yeah. It was like it was pretty dope. Let's play it. I want to see it. Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah I just want to feel something today. I had. How about this. Let me remember I hadn't spoken about anything in public prior to this. Your show now is like it's like news is the news media now. Like this is you know this is literally trying to decide if they have to test it. But it is. I'm like all right. So I was like let's you know I talked about my own terms with you. I felt comfortable. I'm like you know you were like you take it off you want to just leave it just put it out and have it. And ever since then it's been like a new thing for me because like it's out in the open now. Now my new hour that I'm torn with like I talk about my family my kids. I never did that before. But I do some of that. Will you honestly just talk like honestly sound like just tell me like yeah because I think there's like there's probably parts in all of our lives where afraid to talk about something. Yeah. Or afraid to talk about it. And then it ends up being different on the other side because yeah I think you were. Yeah let's just say we'll take a peek at it really quick. We can always take this out. I love the music in the background. I don't know what. You can't process it. You can't believe it. I'm crying. You should be crying. That's good. That's good man. Why do they put the music like that was a little. It was it felt like yeah it felt like the beginning of Castlevania. Remember that game. Yeah. The music. Yeah like come on this guy's like on the one two player screen is like yeah in the beginning. The guy is a wish. That was a gay player dude. Yeah that's like when a gay guy kind of gets trapped and like like you know fucking out of house. Halloween party in New Jersey dude. That's what Castlevania was because it's just this dude just running around with a whip. That wasn't like the like the most popular clip. And what happened was a lot of parenting like accounts like Instagram accounts and then yeah they picked that up and inspirational accounts. Oh that's. And it was a different clip and that it just went like so so viral. And then because your show is like so big like like us weekly and did they really all those people and all that stuff picked up it's like Sal secret wedding. And it wasn't really a secret. I just didn't like tell you guys I got married. It was like a secret wedding. But that's kind of hot though. It kind of makes it kind of hot for you and Francesca that it's just like oh it's a secret wedding. That had some allure to it. Oh and practical joker star Sal reveals. He secretly got married and has a baby daughter. Bro that makes you sound like a fucking rapper. Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. Yeah. But dude I have a boy now too. No. The best dude. It's the best. Is he. Yeah he's so dope. He's awesome man. What's his name. Yeah. If it would have been any other. I would not have been excited. Dude that's so cool man. Yeah. But did it feel like I want to I want to hear about him. Yeah. Well yeah tell me what do you love about. What's what it's something that's just like. You know it's so cool it's like so I went through everything with my daughter and then like. She's like three and a half now he's about 16 months and like you you you. It goes so fast. It's so nice to get to do it over again. Because those moments that when they're that young are so fleeting they change. They're growing so fast there. Like it's a new thing all the time and it goes lightning fast. And you try the best you can to savor it. But it's like it's it's it goes so fast. So then to just start from scratch again. And then like the first time it's all firsts for you and the kid. Right. So it's like you're processing all this stuff. And then so the second time you have like a you have this foundation and an idea and you know what to look for. And so you kind of experience it in a different way. You just experience it like a little bit more. You're able to really absorb it because it's not like you're like a deer in the headlights. Oh I see. And so it's like you're playing hot potato the whole time. Yeah exactly. And it's like you just and you just it's just really nice to those those stages are the ones that you know parents are always like oh if I could have my kids back at that age again you know. So it was like nice to get like a double dip in there. That's cool. And and just watch them grow like interact and and watch their relationship together build like the kids. There's nothing that that's the when they're like sitting on the couch to get a leaning on each other just eating fruit you know like and he'll just crawl up on the couch and put his head on her shoulder while she's just like eating some fruit and they just sit there like and then you walk into the room and you see them just cuddling each other or whatever. It's like come on man. There's like literally nothing close to this. Oh that's so cute. I get right in between them you know they get on you know. Yeah. But the best thing I could do is just have my kids in my lap just holding them you know like just watching like just. Yes I know it's I bet it's almost like as you almost I bet can't I bet you almost feels like you can't even let them know how much you love them. It's impossible. It's impossible. That's kind of a crazy thing if you think about it that there's something inside of us. Yeah. Even this is humans right where you I couldn't even let you know how much I love you if I had like it's impossible for me to. It's it's it's impossible. I don't know how to express it. Yeah. And do you feel like that's probably a feeling for most parents. It has to be. I think it's an innate feeling. Right. So so and I'm not trying to go to but I forget sometimes if I don't share what I'm feeling so that to me just shows us how powerful love must be if we can't even if like as human beings just as like citizens in the world. Yeah. We can't even if like the love that you would have for your child you can't even express. It can't be expressed. It can't even expressed. Although nothing will do it justice. There's no way that like actually encapsulate it. It's pretty powerful because the other things you can express a lot of other feelings like anger, hatred, you know, like, yeah, affection or like, look up some other feelings. Sorry. Would you stop short of three? What was pretty happy mad. What else? Confused, cranky. I mean, all these other things. But this is so key. You know, I mean to cut you off. No, no, go on. You cut me off. But you get what I'm saying though. Isn't it crazy that we can't even that it's love is such a powerful thing we it's bigger than us even as humans because we're not able to convey. You know what I'm saying? We can't do it. And that is pinging in my heart at all times. Like, you know, when you're like your heart melts, you're not feeling like sometimes just in a moment you see something or like whatever. And you're like your heart like melts a little bit. So what this is like is that like the melting feeling is constant. Oh, yeah. So like just fully it doesn't stop walking around with a mop. Yeah, dude, it just doesn't stop. It's like continually melting the whole time. If you're you know, I talked about they're in if they're even in the room with me, just something changes. You know, that's it. It's just it's wow. But I remember you saying that, dude. Yeah, it was just that was that was awesome to hear about. And they're so it's so cute to see them like like see those. You just had up those those color coded things. So my daughter, she goes to like occupational therapy and she to learn about like to process this stuff and her feelings that they teach her this stuff. And so she she knows all these these color coded emotions. So when she comes home and she's having like a because they're going to, you know, they're going to have these like these it's inevitable for them to like when they grow up to have these like, you know, they're tantrums in this that they have to work through all this is not like you have a bad kid if they are like if they act out like they're going to be crazy at two and three years old. Right. Because they're all these feelings are slowly are getting baked in. He's getting developed and they don't know how to, you know, it's like the first time you get on a lime scooter, you'd like, you know, if I can take in that bit for a second, that was like the first time I got on one. Yeah. Yeah. It was like, I didn't know what was going on. Yeah. But she'll tell me like if she's like upset, she'd be like, dad, I'm in the blue zone right now. They call the blue zone. She's like, dad, I'm in the blue zone right now. And I'm like, you're upset. She's like, yeah, I'm sad. I'm in the blue zone. She's like, I need to get to the green zone. Like this is how she speaks to me. I'm like, let's do it. What do you need to get into that green zone? Let's do it. No, man. They're like my, you know, best little best friends. Dude, that's so cool. Though also for a kid, even just to be able to like, well, just to have a, instead of just having a feeling, have a thought about a feeling, right? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Well, what is it? So it's, it's like, it's so much more to you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's unreal. You're not just a victim of how you feel. You there's a little bit more like, okay, well, let me. Well, they start critical. Like they start thinking in a way that's just not just basic. It's like, think about like at the end of the day, we, when she goes to bed, we always discuss the day. So we talk about like, I'll sing our song. And in the song, I, with the song, I sing her every night, I made, I made it up myself. Oh, just naturally it came out, you know, and then I started adding verses to it. Now I sing this whole song. And the song, the whole point of that song is I love you. I love you so much. You'll never know how much I love you. Like that's literally what it is. But then we talk about the day and, and then I'll say, like, you know, what, you know, what were you most proud of today? So like, she's three, but to get her thinking like that, like not just like, what would you do today? But what were you the most proud of tonight? It positions her mind to think that way. And then like build our confidence of it. This stuff, like there's so much parenting stuff and psych, psychology, child psychology, all that stuff. It's fascinating. And it's like, you know, it's the most important job you'll ever have, you know? So I like taking, like, you know, it's, it's, it's, it's great to, it's hard, but it's like, it's really fun to, to raise a, to raise a human being. It's, it's like, it's so, it's so, it's an honor, you know, like it's a real honor. Dude, that's pretty cool to be able to think out, think about it like that. Yeah. A great story like Monsters Inc. stays with you forever. And Disney Class is where you'll find your next great story from the return of the award winning hit series, Rivals. Welcome to the naughtiest show on television. To the unmissable crime drama, High Potential. Gotta dead body, gotta go. A lifetime of great stories awaits. 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And that's where better help comes in better help therapists work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully licensed in the U S better help does the initial matching work for you. So you can just focus on your time with your therapist and your therapy goals. When life feels overwhelming, therapy can help. Sign up and get 10% off at better help.com slash Theo. That's better H E L P. Dot com slash Theo better help.com slash Theo. And do they ever like if they get in trouble, they'll like give me a punishment dad, like do they ever make you give them like something that's just like, no, they're too young for that. Like send me out in a traffic or something. You don't do punishments yet. No, no, it's more about just managing, you know, just managing their behavior. But it's like, yeah, they just punish him. Yeah, what was it? But what was it like? So after you kind of shared that you had a family, you kind of had that your family was growing, right? And sometimes, you know, I know you had said like, it's not always everybody. You want to keep certain things that are just your own life, right? Yeah, I stopped. I was, I mean, I'm private. I was always private. So once you give it away. Did it feel different? It felt like a weight lifted. It did. It did. And has it been a positive thing? Or do you? Or just like, yeah, has it been like, okay, does it feel? Because trying to also protect everything all the time is also kind of, it's a lot of stress. That that took a lot. It took a lot to keep things to myself and not, you know, like not let things get out and when I'm out in public with them, you know, like, because everyone has a camera now and everything is that you're always got this little like bird, like a worry, you know, because I want to, I won't ever post my kids online. Like I want to shield them from that. But just it was just about protecting them. But people would chill with it. And like now that it's out there, it's like, it feels like I could just freely talk about it feels good. Yeah, feels good. It was like, you know, I'm glad I did it. Yeah. What was one of the tough experiences that you had with your first child? Was there like a time that would like, you know, because like the other day, my buddy Kevin and his wife, they like, I think maybe their kid like ate like a thing, a little bit of guacamole or something. And I was allergic. I think his ears like swolled up or whatever. No, dude, that's scary shit. And I'm like, shit, he's allergic to like Mexican shit or whatever. You know? So that's like, no, you never know, but you don't want to run your kid into the hospital and sound racist. Like, Hey, I think he's allergic to like Mexican flavors. Mexican flavors. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I meant. Yeah. I don't think that anyone would take it as like, you know, any a slight against any Mexican people are trying to look for an edge all the time. They are. And I think I would be sort of specified. Me too. It's the ingredients. Like, yeah, they happen to be, they happen to be all Mexican cuisine, but I don't know what that. Yeah, they happen to use it best. But yeah. And I think these have been bought from like maybe a Latin vendor. It could have been a Puerto Rican guy. Who knows? It could have been. Yeah. That's the craziest thing though. Like when they, but yeah, so they get hurt or something like that. So they ran to me. Yes. But they're like, they don't know what's going on. You're like, you know, Max, he is a swollen up. You know, he's allergic to watching LaBomber or whatever. I don't think that's a problem. But anyway, yeah. But anyway, what I'm saying is, sorry, what is wrong with me? Why can't I say what I'm saying? What I'm saying is that it threw my body for like a crazy, it was crazy. You know, I saw him like it was like he was so freaked out. Dude, I sometimes they'll fall, like hit their mouth and start bleeding or something. You see when you see blood on your kid, it's like, and you have to be like so chill, you have to dictate the tone so they don't, you know, then they're true. Yeah. I mean, that's the best way to do it to keep them even tempered and like, they're going to reflect your energy and they're going to react the way you teach them to react to something. So you always got to try and play it even keeled and like not make a big thing of stuff like that so that they're able to handle situations themselves better. But it is nuts, dude. Like, oh, one time I was like, you're trying to cut my son's nails. Like, you know, you got to clip that. Like, and like they don't kids, they don't stay still. And dude, I clipped a little piece of the end of his finger. Like, and he started just bleeding everywhere. Dude, I almost, I didn't know what I was going to do myself after that. I was like so I was in a one time he walked in and go did to his brother. He did. Yeah. He clipped or he's got. I think he might have cut his ear off or something. Never mind. No, Van Gogh cut his own ear off, but I didn't know he clipped anything on his brother. So maybe everyone in the family was missing something in there. Dude, did you know Pablo Picasso died like a couple of years ago? You see that clip? Yeah, I did. What was it? Friends told us Gary Vibe. Gary. Oh, Vita was with me this week. It was. Oh, it was Vita. Okay. Let's talk with him. He's the one who told me, yeah, we were talking in the car actually. He's like, dude, yeah, bring it up. Let's bring that clip. I mean, it was 50 years ago, but like I thought Picasso was like from the 18th and he told it. We're in the car. He's like, do you know this? And I was like, no, he's like, dude, he was, he was like alive when we were born. Yeah. I think one of the part of it is, did you know that Picasso probably ate an outback steak house? Right, right, right. That's insane. Right, right. I never put that together. Yeah. Oh, yes. It's Joe List. Sorry, sorry, my bad. You guys know this. Pablo Picasso, you know when he died, he died in 1973. Did you know that? I thought he died in 1380. I almost shit. 1973. Picasso had a car. Is that unbelievable? Pablo Picasso was driving around Spain in like a Honda Civic listening to Black Sabbath on the radio. That's crazy. Ozzy Osbourne and Pablo Picasso were working at the same time. He saw six Super Bowls. I thought he looked like he was like, oh, listen to that. That's good. Yeah, dude, he's so great. He was in a great movie that Louis made too, man. Yes. Shadow of Joe List. That movie was great. They did a good job. Such a talented guys. That was a great bit. I got something. So I want to try and find these people. Maybe this saying that here can help me. All right. I got a story for you. Yeah. I talked. So this last night, we talked about this last night, just came out. It was a story that I forgot about and I'm like, I'll talk to Theo about it. Maybe I could get. So in 1995, I was at the Salvation Army with my buddy Joe. And we found a VHS cassette, right? And it was like a home, a home one, not like a movie like you buy, like, you know, a home, like a blank. OK, I had a label on it and it said, Amy and Stu Shankman's wedding. And it was I'm going to maybe get the exact date wrong, but let's say it said like November 25th, 1995, it said, I'm sorry, it said November 25th, 1985. OK, right? It said, Stu and Amy Shankman's wedding November 25th, 1985. That day that we picked it up was November 25th, 1995. So I found this blank set of this people's wedding on their 10 year anniversary. Now, back then you got if you had your wedding taped on VHS, that's where it was. That's it. Like that was the copy. Yeah. And this was handwritten. So it's like, I think they accidentally got rid of it. Like they don't have their wedding video. You know, right? So Amy and Stu Shankman do not have their wedding video. Right. And I and we picked it up on the exact day. We were like, holy shit, 50 cents. We bought it. We went home and watched their whole wedding. Right. It's amazing. It's a wedding from 1985. It's a Jewish wedding from 1985. The best man is little short guy, Yarmulka. He does he does his in his best man speech. He raps. I swear to God. And I'll know. I mean, I've at this point, I've watched it. Was it Beastie Boys? He was dozens of times. No, he raps his own rap. Oh, and now this is the part. This I'll never I know because I watched it. So he's like, he's he's he's jumping up and down. And he's like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. We're going to party tonight. We're going to jump up and down. It's never going to end. This was the rap. So it's an amazing wedding. I swear to God, it's an amazing wedding. And and I watch it over the years. I've had people over. We put it on. I watch it this this night about maybe five years after that. I met my friend, Joe, we're in a gas station. He's getting gas in his car and he's like, Sal. And I'm like, look at that car right there. And there's a car that's like pulling out of the gas station. He's like, look, look, look in the car. Who do you think that is? And I look and I go, is that fucking Stu Shankman? No, I don't know this guy from a home. Right. He's like, I think it's Stu Shankman. So I'm like, oh, shit. And he pulled out and my friend had to finish paying the gas. And we jumped in the car, peeled out and tried to follow him. Yeah. And we lost him. Oh, OK. So fast forward. I hate losing people. I hate especially in a chase. Yeah. So then I never gave. I have this wedding video. I still have it. You have a piece of their life. You have a piece of one of the greatest moments of their life. Yeah, right. So so about two years ago, I'm like, we got to find these people. Searching for Stu Shankman. Yes. And we got we got to see if like what's I got to get them this video. So my friend found his brother or something on Facebook and confirmed. Like we were like, who knows if they're dead, if they're still together. What's going on? So he reached out. He said that told them we got at a thrift store. We found their wedding video in 1995. Like I've had I've had their wedding video for 31 years. Oh, I have it for 31 years. I've had their wedding video. They've been married. This will be their 41st anniversary this year. Their brother's like, they're still alive. And to get I swear to God, he's like, this is insane. You got to like, yes, so I'll let's broker this. Yeah. So but so I had the idea a couple of years ago. When I was developing a TV show. And so this was an idea for one episode of this TV show where I like do things like this. And so that's when we decided to reach out. Anyway, I didn't finish developing the show and I kind of forgot about him. And I thought of it last night and I brought it up and I was like, oh, shit. In this brother's eyes, we contacted him. We're like, yo, we have their wedding video and we want to get it to you. And then we went radio silent again. He's like, why do these people do this to me and my family? So I'm like, I got it. I got to remember. I got it. I got to find them and I want to get in the video. So I feel like if if anyone knows, I think they were originally from Staten Island. And so Stu and Amy Shankman and I have your wedding video for the last 31 years. And I want to give it to you. I did digitize a copy of it for myself because I when I thought I was going to give it back, I was like, I won't share it with anyone, but I know it's it's also a piece of me now. It's fine as fate. Yeah, exactly. You know, so I have it. So, so yeah, we got to find you got to search him for the Shankman's, dude, because there's something special about that. I know I used to know a guy named Alex Shankman. I knew a couple of Shankman. Oh, I know a Shankman, too. Actually, there was an agent I knew. I actually know a Shankman. I knew I don't think they're related, but I know you just remind me. I think he's like a choreographer. Yeah, there's a lot of things out there. Is there a famous Shankman choreographer, especially in Hollywood? Adam Shankman. Adam Shankman. I didn't know Adam. I just realized for the first time I know a Shankman. The Shankman. Yeah. Hey, you know a Shankman? Yeah. Dude, that's wild. The hope I find them. Well, I hope that you find them also. Stu and Amy, the guy's been holding your love and, you know, the guy's been watching you one of the greatest moments of your life. In his spare time on the L train. So right. Yeah. Dude, do you think there's really something could be a cool show out there to make or create? People say this shit all the time, but. Of like something about finding old things on VHS and then. Yeah, like found footage. Yeah, dude, I worked with this one comedian. There had been like the one of those Nigerian scams that had happened to his grandmother and they taken a lot of her money, right? You know, those things that email you. Yeah, the prince. Like I'm trapped in a petting zoo in Nigeria or something. They won't let me out or whatever. Send the money. So to get him back, he started doing these things where he would send them. Videos of things. And he said, if you do, I need you to do reenactments of this and then I'll pay you for it. But instead, he would just have him do the reenactment and then he would just post the video online, right? No. But the best part was what he would send him was he would send him scenes from Seinfeld, right? So he would send like scenes from Seinfeld to like some people in Africa, like in just a random village and they would reenact the scenes. No. Yeah. And he had all these amazing. You got to be kidding me. He had all these amazing video clips, dude. Oh my God. Of an African village reenacting like master of my domain. Yes. Or the parking one, like they had all these different ones that he was reenacting. It was pretty great, dude. And so eventually it healed him. He's like, OK, at a certain point we're kind of even, you know? But dude, because comedians can hold some grudges over the years. But yeah, I've always been a little bit of a collector. You find something you save and you're like, maybe I'm so. You told me one time. I don't know if you remember this, you told me one time. In hindsight, now I realized you were probably joking, but you were like, yeah, I have a marble notebook with the name of every person I've ever slept with. And it was him. Really? Yeah. Oh, I'm like, get out of here. He's like, yeah, I'm like, yeah. A marble notebook. You said you had a notebook. I mean, in my head, I projected it was like a mead, like a school notebook. You're like, yeah. And I've written it down my whole life. And I'm like, you got to be fucking kidding me. And you're like, no, I know, I know the exact number of people I've slept with. Really? Yeah. Yeah. See, you fuck with me. I'm sure. But I was always kind of a documenter of things. The number. And I remember the number you said. Yeah, I do. Yeah. Because it's really funny. OK. It's really funny. I this is the only part I can't believe that I would say something like this, but I want to hear it. You want to know what you told me? I said, you said I have every single name. I never missed a name. And I was like, you know the exact number you slept with. You said, yeah, like how many he said about a thousand fifty. Really? Yeah. And then you're like, I'm not good at it, but it was a thousand fifty. And I was hysterical. I was like, no one is. I mean, it's like Will Chamberlain. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's insane. Yeah, I don't even know it was me, but I believe that I could have said this. You told me that. Oh, I did. Good. Good. Oh, I bet at least I was. You don't have a. I mean, your real number is not anywhere close to that. That's crazy. That's insane. Oh, dude, yeah, I mean, yeah, I've always like a thousand fifties. It's the perfect deal. It's really the perfect number to say, because it's like to go over a thousand. It's great. Yeah, it's a thousand and eight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dude, I remember when I was growing up, they had this kid, his brother had slept with like 12 women or something. People were fucking losing their minds in our town. Yeah, because we're cutting down trees and fucking tickling people. They shouldn't touch and shit like that. Shit like that will affect you. Oh, dude. When you know, when you have like a when you're of an age where no one's got that kind of number yet, or maybe everyone's a virgin. Oh, yeah. And then one kids, I got slept with 12 people. You're just like, I got to I got to know all about. Here we go. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, yeah, I'm just for, yeah, there's nothing. Yeah, then my life means nothing. You know, working in a basket, Robbins or whatever. And some guys slept with 12 people. 12 people. I should be in Hades, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that shit was hectic, dude. Dude, I was the worst at sex. Let me see. Let's look at all high activity, lifestyle for a person averaging one new partner per week. It would take approximately 20 years to reach a thousand partners. So yeah, I lied. I lied, bro. Dude, there was some years where I wouldn't even get involved in any sex. I was so fucking bad at it. You you were bad at it. So you've come a long way. I've come a long way, dude. Yeah. Yeah. I think we'll for one. Are you a generous lover? Yeah. No, no, OK. I'm not, dude, I'm like that for me. This I realized this the other day. I'm in like this I'm in recovery, meaning for everything. So I was in one the other day and people talk about this kind of stuff a lot and like intimacy disorders, shit like that, right? Like I'm out here. I'm basically like, I'm like a crash test dummy. That's what I realized. Like other people are like living a life and I am basically a crash test dummy out here. Why do you feel that way? Just because it's like I feel like I'm never going to figure out some of these parts and I'm just going to be almost this like experiment that kind of happens, you know? And like I realized I thought of it loving. It was like a off. It felt like a alter. It's like an altercation you get in. It has the same energy of like a session like a flight to mid session. Yeah. In the mid session has like a sexual session has like a battle. Yeah, it's a fight, not like physically, like it's a fight, but just like the same amount of nervous energy that's in a fight. Sure. Sure. Sure. That's the energy that I take into like a sexual. Right. Right. So like if you if you see me if you're working up and I just keep kind of ducking or dodging or if I duck off into the corner and have some guy, I barely know, rub me a spore on my cheeks or whatever and put a thing of ice on the back of my neck or whatever. You have a corner, man. Yeah. Just just know I'm doing the best that I can. Just plugging your nose up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Some guys putting a con swab up my nose. But do you I just I always I had so much nervous energy around women, bro. Yeah. So that was crazy, dude. I love when they do like in a UFC fight or like a boxing match, whatever, when they cut to the corner, right? And it's like, you know, you and you hear everything that the corner guy say in the train is always like wildly inappropriate. Yeah. Like fuck this motherfucker, bro. You're going to fuck him up, man. And then you're like, he's like, you're just sticking him up. And then you're like home watching a fight with like, or you're somewhere. And it's like, you just don't expect here. Like this guy's a motherfucking bitch, bro. Yeah. You know, his mother passed away two months ago. Yeah. I was like, oh, shit. Yeah. You learn this shit. You're like, damn, you know, his cousin has asthma hit this little pussy. Yeah. Like they said, he'll be like, don't be a fucking pussy. But I'm like, whoa, I know. Real in the corner. It's real. But it's really just sounds like that's what makes anybody think they could be a corner. Like also some of those behaviors. Yeah. Yeah. I can say that. Because it doesn't feel like there's a lot of real instruction coming in here. So yeah, sometimes you hear someone give really good pointers, and then you go to the other corner and they're just like, all right, bro. And you're like, what is this guy doing? Yeah, they're saying nothing. They're saying nothing to the guy. I know. Yeah. That is pretty wild, dude. But yes, I'll enter, Mr. Bras, some of that shit. I was like, you know, there's faint and goats. Shit gets going too much. Yeah. And they just go over. Yeah. That's me. Yeah. You hit like a thing. Oh, yeah. I hit like about 30 volts or whatever. Yeah. I hit about. Yo, what is a good sound does a goat make? Let me try it. They have a sheep, though. There's a goat and a sheep make the same noise. I think goats are more curious. So I think it's more like. No, let me try it. Really? No, that's more like, oh, but what does the sheep do then? So it's the same thing. No, sheep that goats. Sheep's bad. Oh, yeah, she's bad. But then the goat is bad. But am I crazy? But I don't know this. I don't know the difference. Is it sheep? Sheep's not a goat. A gay goat just like, bad girl. That's stupid street joke. What is a gay horse eat? Hey, it's so stupid. Dude, some jokes like that, they were the best. No, no, no. Getting to laugh is the best, man. That's the best thing, bro. Getting to laugh. The fact one thing I will say, bro, about. Certain moments are alive, like I've been grateful that God has put me around people that. That love just make me laugh. Yeah, we are our friends of the funniest people in the world. It's crazy. It's crazy. It really is. Yo, I struggle on stage. I always sometimes I think about this, like I I really in the moment on stage when I'm on stage and I like to laugh. And so like I laugh, you know, throughout my set a lot. And then sometimes I'm like, like I don't think of it. It's just me being me. But like a lot of times I'm like, I don't want to laugh. Like I don't want to be like I'm laughing at my own stuff. But I really am in the moment having a good time. But I'm like, I don't want that to come us across as a crutch. So sometimes I'll be like, all right, today, consciously, when you do like this hour, do not laugh, do not laugh. And just see how it plays. Like don't laugh. Just like kind of keep, you know, and see how it plays differently with, you know, like you do like are you in the moment when you're on stage, you laugh at your own, well, you laugh and like just have fun. The moment are you like kind of like keep it like this persona of like, you know, because when you like tell your stories and stuff, you have a like, you know, you have a certain energy involved the way you do it. Yeah. But you do you are like just like, do you think about that on stage? I do. So you like consciously don't won't laugh or like, will you just like laugh? I'd like to laugh more. I used to think like, especially when I was coming up in common, you hear about all these things that are kind of crutches. I don't want to. Yeah, some people write their notes. You're like, well, that's a crutch. And it's like, well, that's a crutch. Well, also, how about this? Somebody's getting up in front of you and trying to make a room full of people laugh. Right. I don't care if they're on crutches. Eight crutches. I don't care if they're I don't care if there's one person in two wheelchairs. Let them if there's things that help them. I think it to me, I think it's OK. Yeah. Well, I don't want to. I'm not doing it as a crisis. What I'm saying is like, I naturally laugh. Yeah. And so I have to fight my natural instinct. Don't ever fight your laugh. Do you laugh is your laugh is one that warms people. It's like it's extra you, you know, so that I think is a gift. And I think some of these people, they've gotten to know some of us in our lives and they may be they may feel happy that we're in a room laughing, you know, just like they are, you know, yeah. Yeah, I'm having a good time. Yeah, I don't want to. I say laugh, dude. I notice if and I'll even be conscious of it. So I was like, oh, this set's not going that great in the beginning. And sometimes it's like, dude, it's because you're not having fun. Yes. So let myself have fun. Yes. And let me be the person that's saying the jokes. Really, sometimes I'll try to almost transpose myself and pretend like I'm just sitting there laughing at the jokes. Right. And then just almost like, I don't know. Because the person I always wanted, I wanted to be the person sitting there laughing, but to me, I've always had like, you know, sometimes there's like a chip or mushroom or some type of shit. Right. No, this bang, bang, bang, bang, you know. And so I was always like, you know, or being judgment or whatever. So so we end up on the other end of the thing. I'm going to be the guy who's being a part of making the laughter. But either way, I'm happy to be involved in the laughter. And I think it's okay if you laugh with a crutch or some people say it's crutch. I don't, I find it, especially as I get older, fuck, if I get a chance to laugh. Yeah. But I think that's that's what I'm saying. Sorry, that was a lot of shit to say. No, I think just making the distinction of like, I'm on stage having a good time. Like not with intent, like some people will laugh. One thousand and fifties. Crazy. It's crazy. Yeah. That's a crazy thing to say. I thought about it ever since you told me. Did you really have to have that? I retain the knowledge. Bro, you know how scary would be if one woman came over to my house every week to hook up and fucking make me sound crazy to me when you said it. Well, if I knew that every week, some gal was coming over for sex, dude, I would fucking have to keep moving. It's off putting. Yes. You're like, oh, it's too much. It's too much. The schedule is too insane. Too much, man. Yeah, that's a lot. That's a lot hanging over your head, man. Every week, I get anxiety thinking about that and hearing them peel off and disappointment too. Hearing the grab. They're leaving a hurry. Yeah. And you don't even have gravel. They're so pissed they went and bought gravel and put it under their tires. I love that. Every time someone leaves your house, they have to say, you peel out of here. Yeah, dude, bro. My fucking uncle, he was supposed to get gravel and he actually got a bunch of like fish on whatever the stuff that goes to the bottom of the pellets. Yeah. Fish, Kate, fish, fish food. Yeah. And I was like the fish. Koi. Yeah. No, shit that goes in a fish. Oh, the fish. Gravel. The fish tank gravel. Yeah, you got fish tank gravel, dude. And his wife was so pissed, but it was irritable, bro. And dude, they fought about that shit. But hearing people fight over, yeah. And you're fucking fish gravel. You and your fucking fish gravel, James. Just hearing shit like hearing terms like that. You and your shitty little fish gravel. Yeah. Yeah. Fighting over gravel. Yeah. Just fish gravel. Hearing any people fight over gravel, just God, that's the kind of shit that keeps me going. I have, I had a fish. My niece, you know, when they have like the ferrets. They go to school. Yes. Like the festival. And they give those fish they're about to die. They give them to children. God, that's fucked. It's messed up. Yeah. You throw like a ping pong ball in a cup and then they send the kid home with a bag of fish and like these fish are just dying. Yeah. And so my niece brought home a fish and I knew this shit was going to die. Because like I, when I did it, when I was a kid, I could never keep a fish alive because I didn't have a setup. I'd come home, put the fish in a bowl. Yeah. And then not really understand it needs a filter and it needs to be aerated and then the fish would eventually die and feed it like bread, you know, and then it would die. I brought a fish home and I was like, I don't know if I've ever told the story, but like I brought a fish home from school and I was like, I knew that the previous fish had died and I thought it because they didn't have bubbles, which in my head, I was like, it needs bubbles. I didn't think it needed like air. Right. It needs bubbles. So I got home. My mom wasn't home yet. So I put a big salad bowl, I put the fish in it and I got a straw and I was going to tell my mom, we have to go to the thing to buy the fish store to buy the stuff. So this fish survives, but I needed to bridge the gap till she got home. So I took a straw and for like three hours, I blew into the bowl, but I was blowing carbon dioxide into the bowl and I killed the fish immediately. So the fish died within hours because I was just hitting it with CO2 out of my mouth. So my niece brought this fish home years later. I'm like, I'm not going to let this happen again. I went and got the setup and I ended up having this fish for seven years. And then I moved, the fish came with me and then one day the fish was dead. And I had a nowhere though. It like died out of nowhere. And no reason to use it. I just cleaned the tank. It was a very healthy fish and I think it was foul play. I really do think so. No way. I think someone put like, because I tested the pH band, I would do all that shit. And then I had to clean it and then like I had people over and then it was dead. And then I think it was like someone like poured something in the tank. Then I didn't want to flush the fish because I had a 70 relationship with the fish. Oh yeah. And so I didn't want to flush. So I was going to bury it. I might have told this, but I was going to bury it, but I didn't want to bury in the yard because it was summer and I didn't want it to decompose and smell. So I wrapped it in tin foil. I put it in my freezer and that was like, that's come closing in on. It's like 15 to 20 years ago and I never got rid of the fish. It's still with you. I have a frozen goldfish in my freezer for over 15 years. That fish is still in my freezer right now. And I moved three times and I took it with me. What? Yes. I had to put them in like on ice and like moving this hard on everyone. I have the fish. Oh my God. I have a dead fish for over 15 years in my freezer right now. You know it's in your freezer. No, exactly where it is in my freezer. Oh, it's beautiful. It is man. I took it out on Hey Babe one time. I took it out for the first time. I never unwrapped it in all 15 years and we opened it on Hey Babe. And it was a goldfish, but like I lost a lot of its gold. It was like a pale gold and like the eyes were kind of gone. I guess over time, I guess in the freezer. God takes the gold back or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But what there you are right there. That's COVID you could tell right? Yeah, very very rabbinical right there as well, dude. Oh my God, bro. It definitely has like a Michael Jackson tent to it. That's crazy. Did you see it? Yeah, I can see just a little bit of it there. Yeah, show me that. Dude, you know, oh my God. Wow. Yeah, the poor fish. Oh, it's cool. What was it? Same. I didn't name it and I because that was another thing. I read the fish I had prior. I named died. So I called them fish for seven years. Oh, I like that. At least like the fact you took on a new strategy to keep him alive. Yeah, I was trying everything I could and we had seven nice years. He used to eat out of my hand. Yeah, I don't know if it was really because we had a bond. I think they would just do that anyway. But I like to think it was because we got close. And how do you do it? You put your hand in there? I put my hand right in. I like hold the flake and put it in and we just come out. You're lying. No, no, I swear. It's really not that big a deal. I don't think. I think it is. It's like a drive-through for it. I feel like it's like going to the drive. It felt like a trick. It felt like I had a, you know how they're like a flee circus or something? Yeah. It felt like I had a fish that did tricks. Well, dude, we had the Acro Cats lady. She came on here one. What is that? This lady, she's been traveling around the country for like 20 years or something. And she's, she should drive the tour bus that the cats were in a tour bus. No. Yes. That the cats were in. And I'm paraphrasing a little bit here. But one of the toughest shows that she had, one of the tough experiences, she's on the road somewhere. Somebody had left the window open, maybe from smoking or a cigarette or something. And tuna, the lead cat gets out. No way. Yeah. And she lost the cat. Couldn't find it. No way. And the show must go on. She had like three hours before. So like there's another cat. Tuna's understudy. Yeah. Tuna's understudy or whatever. I don't even remember. Chicken salad. Yeah. It was just like tilapia or something was the understudy. Yo, that's crazy. He's got to come in and he's always, you know, he's Italian. So he's got to come in doing his tilapia. His big break. Yeah. It's like tuna. Yeah. Dude. But they might have taken tuna out. She thinks tuna got away, but they might have been foul played there. That's crazy too, because tuna was a star. And once he leaves and he goes into the open road like that, everyone he passes has no idea who he is. And that's a star cat amongst you. It's almost like a story from the Bible when they didn't know who Jesus was. Yeah. You know, that's pretty cool, dude. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that is amazing, bro. Yeah. I wonder what his cloud is like out in the wilderness though. And father and was like, oh, shit, that's tuna cut. That's tuna. Man, that's tuna. Working out on the street. Like, dang bro, tuna out here, bro. Tuna out here, bro. Damn. He re-liked that. He in the trenches cut. Like, damn, tuna outside. Tuna got out. But dude. Tuna is not about that life anymore. Tuna is not. Yeah, bro. Tuna change, man. What was the last pet you had? You're a pet now? No, you can't ever pet now. No, I never. We're on the road too much, right? Yeah. I've never. I plan to get a dog. Yeah. And this has been a slow feeling for me, but I plan to get a dog and maybe a cat if I can get a wife. And not if. One day I'll get a wife and I'm going to have a family, but I would like to get a dog and cat. And it doesn't all have to happen together or whatever. Yeah. But I think if I don't get married or something, maybe I'll get a dog and cat and maybe something else. I wouldn't mind getting a couple horses probably. Wow. You ride horses? I wouldn't ride them, but I would go over by them. Yeah. You go next to them, talk to them. Yeah, it'd be like that. Brush them. Brush them. Clean them. Let me ask you a question. If I see a horse that's not in the wild, it's got on horseshoes? Every horse in captivity has on horseshoes? That's a good question. Or is it just like parade horses and horses that are like going out on the town or whatever? I'm not sure. Look it up. That's a great question. This guy I know, Mr. Mike is a farrier. What is a farrier? A farrier is the guy that comes in and puts the shoes on the horses. Oh, really? Yeah. That's called a farrier? Trim the toenails and everything. I got stuck on farrier talk for a while and dude, half my fee was farriers. No way. Yeah. Oh, I didn't know that's what they were called. I thought they were like cobblers or something. No, no, no. I think cobblers is for shoeing humans and farriers is for shoeing. I don't know if it's just for animals. No, not all horses need shoes. Whether a horse requires shoes depends on factors like workload, hoof, hoof health, genetics and terrain. I can see how hoof health would be a factor. You got a pair of weak hoofs, you need protection. Oh, dude. If my feet are real tender, I want them bitches on. Yeah. Also, you want that clippity-clop. You know? I don't think you, I don't know if you get a clippity-clop without the shoe. Dude, you telling me a kind of thick kind of tap dancing. A thick horse from Atlanta ain't fucking pulling up with that clip. It is. Ah, yeah. Type shit. Yeah. Yeah. What about those really? What are the Coca-Cola horses like at Christmas? Crazio. Crazio. Crazio. Yeah. That's a that's that's a clippity-clop right there. That horse you like. Dude, when that horse shows up, bro, people, some people salute it. I would salute it. You're like, that's interesting to have that between man and horse. You have confidence in your salute? Yeah. I did a show for the Naval Academy recently, and they asked me to take a picture of the man's salute. And you see salutes in like movies and really in life, but like, I feel like there's a way they do it that like, it looks like it's just, you just do this, but I don't know if this is right. Like some of them do that or like, like is is there a proper way to salute? Like are we saluting the right way right now? Or is it like, I got nervous because I was like, I don't want to insult these people and salute the wrong way. Like do you tuck your finger in? Like you're like, what are you doing with the salute? That's a good question. And they do it like, you know what? And someone who's a guy's like, like it's like super like locked in like the Koreans do that. Really? Like, you know, they do. Yeah. Position of attention. So my hands are to my side, arms are straight down. When I raise my hand to salute, it's going to be flat. Hands not like thumbs not tucked underneath my hand. Like kind of stuff. So we're raising it up. And then because I'm wearing headgear, my index finger is going to come to the edge of my headgear. Arms at a 45 degree angle, hands slightly can and down, not facing up, not facing down. Now just like this, I get my greeting and then I drop my salute. Now that is how it's like for wearing headgear. If I was wearing something like maybe no headgear or maybe the beret, but because I have glasses, then has to come to the edge of my glasses. If I was wearing the beret or maybe no headgear, I also don't wear glasses, then it comes to the edge of my eyebrow. So it depends. You're wearing braces. If you were, you know. He's like, if you have a scrunchie in or whatever. The scrunchie one's the best because you put it in the bag. You're like, hey. You're like, hey. Yeah. Yeah, I was self-conscious. I've always been self-conscious about my salute. You ever ride a horse bareback? That's probably fun. That takes skill right there. Somebody got a horse somehow by us one time and we got on that bitch. Yeah. And we did pretty good. We didn't do good. Bareback though? Yeah, bareback. We tried to get a saddle or something. Somebody put like a thing about like, nobody had a saddle. We shouldn't have this horse. They had a car, like a fair that was near us. And I think when it kind of got in the way from the fair, somebody brought it down there. Being down there drinking with like the car, the carneys and stuff the night before. And so they kept up by this dude, Mr. Ernie's house. And we went over there and we were all getting on and shit. It was pretty friendly. When I think in hindsight, it could have been really dangerous. I almost died on a horse. You did? Yeah. On a class trip in like eighth grade, they put me on a horse that started like full rodeoing. Who put you on a horse? The dude ranch that we went to for the trip. They put me on a horse and this horse, I mean, eighth, seventh, eighth grade, I have no horse experience whatsoever. I get on the horse, the horse is bucking, jumping up and down, kicking and bucking. And I'm looking around like everyone's there. All the other students are on horses that are just sitting. Right. Like just chilling. And then the cowboys are there. And they didn't even react quickly. Like they were like, I was like looking at them and they were looking at me. Basically, like when the rodeo thing opens and the horse is like, oh yeah, that's what this fucking horse was doing. A lot of horses don't, but they don't prefer Italians. I'll say that. Yeah. And there's, you know, whatever. No judgments. A lot of a lot of children don't are allergic to Mexican stuff. Yeah. But yeah. But I forgot. I forgot. I forgot. I forgot. No, no. But I remember it wasn't like, you know, like the rodeo rodeo, but it was enough for like an eighth grade to be terrified. And I'm like looking at these guys like, is anyone going to step in at all? And the guy was just like, and I remember being like, help. I finally just said help. And then the guy was like, all right, just calm down. I'm like, this is how you treat a 12 year old. You can tell me to calm down. I'm just, I'm going to be thrown from this horse. Like, and then they got, they got me off that horse and they gave me the most senior citizen horse they had. Like the back was like slumped inward. Yeah. And then my, I got on that horse, the horse walked up to a tree and started eating the leaves and then wouldn't, didn't leave. And like everyone went on the trail and that horse wouldn't leave the tree and just ate the, yeah. And I just stood there on the, on the horse, like. Yours was like rosemary or something. It was like, it was like, yeah, a glue stick. Yours had a brooch on. Yeah, but I would never get on a horse bear. Dang dude. That's wild bro. Yeah. Horses, I think they're probably the most, they're the best animal that we have until we come out with a new animal. Like until they catch a dragon or make something. Yeah. And, and we did have a neighbor, my friend William had a fish and I remember it, and when it, it died and they went and buried it at the Long John Silver's and like the flower bed outside of there. I remember. Well, that's an interesting choice. You love that restaurant? Yeah, of course. But it's a seafood restaurant. Yeah. Yeah. So I mean, like it's a little bit, like. It was like the closest thing I think people thought like. Yeah. It was nice that they had the flower bed. Yeah. Like bringing back with this community, like just outside of the parking mediums, they had a little bit of like, yeah, kind of semi-designed foliage right there. Yeah. That's always nice. A little extra touch. But I remember his dad took us over there and we put that, and we put it there and did like a prayer or something. I think we might have saluted too. Yeah. Salute that fish. We don't even know. Dude, yeah, you had to salute that thing. Shout out LJS, bro. I feel like horses are like, they're on a lot of like romance novel covers. Like bearback, bearback horse riding is exotic, I feel like. It's also mythological. I think the, the things that will happen to your body, you want to talk about checking yourself for testicle or cancer. But like a nude woman on a horse bearback? That's very exotic, right? Yeah, because I think you think of the stallion and like, I'm going to be the stallion. I'm going to sleep with 1,050 women. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I would, I would take notice if a woman rode by like Patopolis on a bearback on a horse. I would probably pay attention. I would probably, I would probably follow the part because it's very interesting. Yeah, I wouldn't just like let that go by. I would be like, I'm going to find out what, where this is going to end up. I'd want to see what would happen. Dude, did you see, speaking of mythological things, did you see that Artemis space shuttle went to the moon? Do you think that really happened or not? Let's take a gander at it. I think it happened. It's, I mean. Because people are, people are very weary now. Well, first let me start. Do you think the first moon landing happened? I do. Because bring up the shuttle, bring up the picture of the shuttle. I'm sure you've looked at the shuttle and been like, But I also like, when you look at these things, then sometimes I'm like, maybe I can be convinced otherwise. You know what I mean? Like it's crazy that we haven't gone back. We went there now and just, didn't we just drive around it? We didn't get off, right? Yeah, they just went for like a look see or whatever. Yeah, that's why I would never, ever, ever, no matter what you could do, say you could, I would never go into space. Never. Which one of the juggers do you think would go into space if they had to go? Probably Mer. I don't think he has, I don't think he really, Yeah, just say it. He's crazy like that. He's got it. Yeah, he's, he'd go up there, I wouldn't, but I think that he's always looking for something new. Yeah. Imagine what they must have felt like. I just saw that movie, that new Ryan Gosling movie, like it's like, he goes into space. Well, all they do is take beautiful men and put them out into space, dude. Yeah. A lot of these movies, it's Matt Damon, it's Ryan Gosling, it's Steven Tyler, they just take these good looking guys and they, or what's his name? Well, well, right, all right. Oh yeah. McConaughey went to space. In Tostella, right? That's when you know Hollywood's like, this guy's good looking enough. We'll take him and show him off to the other planets. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I can't even imagine. Try to pick up a new market, you know. Go out there, I mean, I would be, Well, look at that. Terrified, bro. Yeah, I'd be terrified too, dude, if I went to space in a lifeguard tower from Santa Monica Beach. That's it? Yeah. That looks, yeah. Look at it, can you zoom on it? It looks like a toy, like a transformer or something. Bro. Yeah, that doesn't, that doesn't look like it. I don't have confidence. Bro, come on, dude. That's not even a fucking food truck, bro. That looks flimsy, bro. Those little like legs and stuff. Like how do you get up there and be like, man, I would feel like the existential threat of the universe on my shoulders. Dude, they didn't even put a horseshoe on it, dude. That thing is, man. Look at the legs of it. Can you imagine being up there alone and no, see, this is the thing too, like they went up there, they did a couple of loop-to-loops, but then that doesn't necessarily mean like coming back is hard. Yeah. Like it's risky coming back. So like you're signing up, I'm sorry, like none of those people can say for certainty that they, like I wonder what the, what the odds were that they could be, it could go south. Yeah. Like I bet you it wasn't like 99%. Like I bet you it was like, all right, it's like 70, 30, like you might explode on the way home. Right. That's crazy, dude. It's crazy. Do you have to imagine me coming home and see earth and you're like, all right, like and then it goes? Dude, when I was a kid, we watched the Challenger live at school. You know, we all watched it and we watched it live and it fucking blew up and it was like, the teacher, everyone just started crying. I was like, we were like, what? Trying to wrap our head around. I was like third grade or something. Trying to wrap my head around the fact that like, there was a school teacher in there and they just blew up. Remember this on live television? Yeah. That's wild. There was a pet, wasn't there also a puppy in there? Was there? I thought that they sent a puppy in there. Wow. I can't believe that we even did this right now. To me, it just feels like it's like, it's funny. We can't send help in Nagasa, but we can send the Artemis to to go circle around the moon. Wow. Like that to me is like, what did we, what, what was the purpose of the mission? Do you know? It's a great question. Let's look it up. It wasn't just like, and I'm sorry, there was no live animal on the space. Little Challenger during the final flight in 1986. God bless those people and their families. Yeah. Holy shit. I know man. Can you imagine? You like, who you like? Let's have a moment of that. Let's see. Can you imagine that like, we're sitting like, because you could, you could probably get in like, let me be honest with you. If they pick some people to go to space right now, right? Yeah. And Merget's sick or whatever, something happened to him. He gets in a loss. It didn't happen to me. I wouldn't even go like out of this little, just right above the atmosphere. I wouldn't even do that. I wouldn't do that. Katy Perry went to space. She, I don't know. I read yesterday she went to space. People said that they went to space, but that shit was so, it was very like, that was very sketchy, like waving at people. There was like friends coming up to the edge. I was like, this isn't his space. Like that shit. Would you go? Would you go? I don't know. We're fucking this planted up so much. We don't need to be exporting whatever we're doing right now. I don't believe I like, we belong on a rocket. Yes. Right now. You know what I'm saying? Like I still, I still get more, I'm still getting used to flying in planes. Well, do you know what I do think though? Oh, this is a good question. Let's, let's answer this for people. The Artemis mission are NASA's current program to return humans to the moon and use it as a stepping stone for future trips to Mars. We're not going to inhabit another planet. We're not going to. You can't. But why are we going up there? I guess, you know, I guess we're, but that's, I don't like that shit when somebody's like, Hey, I want to come visit you, but really did a stain overnight so they can go visit somebody else further away. I don't like someone else. I never thought about that. That's what we're doing. It says carry out the moon to Mars strategy, land astronauts on the moon. We're basically using the moon to for a place to relax for a little while. Establish a sustainable long-term human presence on the moon rather than just short-term flags and footprints visit like the Apollo dog. Some of this shit flags and footprints also was the name of the all male dance team at, at Covington High School when I was there. Yeah. That's, that's pretty good. They were safe chance. Yeah. Who's going to go? How do you, okay. Let's say, let's say, but what do they do? Right. We get to the point. I interrupt you. No, no, no. I'm just saying, let's say we, we get to the point where people are like, are we ready to move up there? It's like, okay, how, how many, who's going up there first with what? Like, what are you going up there with some two by fours? Like you got to build a brick and mortar. Like you got to build a house. You got to have some type of currency. You got to have like a, a bank, a restaurant. Like who, who's, who's going up there building that stuff? Like you need enough. And then you need enough people. Like, I don't understand. I don't understand. I don't understand. How many people do you need to inhabit the moon at the exact same time to make it a thing where people live there and go about their daily lives there? Like what's it going to be like? Or is it just going to be like prehistoric at first? Do you like signing up to go up there and live in a tent and like just live off the land and have no entertainment? Like what do you mean? Like, like, like that thing they do in the desert every year. What is it? Like Burning Man. Like Burning Man. Yeah. It's like what, how, how do you properly inhabit? Like, you know, Brother, this is for the elites. So yeah, yeah, yeah. This is for the elites. You know, they're not bringing a couple of giggle monkeys like us up there. This is for the elites. I think this is like, they're planning to do like, like they can't do an Epstein's Island anymore. I think they're looking for like Epstein's orb, you know, we're going to find a place where we can really be nasty out here. Yeah. It's like maritime law out there. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, yeah, you're in the international war. Right. International air. Yeah. So I think that like, I don't know, there is a big part of me do that and I really, there's a big part of me that questions this. Doesn't believe it. It questions it like. You don't think we went? I don't know if we went. I do believe in one. They're trying to distract us from a lot of the horrible things that are going on in the world right now that we're a part of. Sure. So I do think that there's some of that because there's a lot of these weird things like one lady's mother gets kidnapped. They can't find her, you know, but they can tell you where your door dash order is missing and where it's been. Right. Or you can't find one lady. That's wild. Yeah. But she disappears from a porch. You got nothing. Right. Right. But we're going to move to the moon. Right. But we're going to move to the moon. Yeah. I think there's like some of it's that it's like, oh, we need a trip to the moon. That'll get people excited. You know what I'm saying? Like something to distract us. The pictures look crazy though. You saw the pictures of. Yeah. I have seen them bring some of them up. That's why it's wild. It's like. But I think yeah, it could be that maybe something is, do you ever start to worry that something is going to happen to earth and that that's why there's like. I mean, because it's kind of it seems like a weird time to send some people out to look at the moon. Do you agree? I think anytime. I don't know if there's ever a right time. And I guess I agree with you. I'm always thinking something's going to happen. I think maybe right after Christmas or something. You said a couple of dots. Yeah. They always have those. They always have those things where it's like those predictions from like Aristotle. Like it's like, you know, or like they predicted in the few. Like Nostradamus. Nostradamus. Yeah. And it's like. Like have they come true? That's a good question, dude. Oh, these are some of the photos. I mean, bro, it's pretty wild that we're out here like that. And dude, you're telling me this shit. Hold on. You're telling me the best we can do is some guy takes this with his thumb in front of the thing. That's the kind of shit that makes me feel like I know it makes I would have deleted that one. I would have deleted that one. You know, like. Yeah, dude. Yeah. I can't imagine seeing that when I own eyes though. That's wild. And then the moon, bro, that bitch is vibing though. She's mixed. Yeah. She's mixed for sure, dude. Oh, look at that. I don't know, dude. I don't. I mean, I think I'm, I think I want to live there. It's just. I don't know. It looks like. I don't know. Maybe you do zero gravity. Like you ever do that floating around like the space. Now my buddy did it. He said it's it's one of the craziest things he's ever felt in his life and just flying, just flying in this arena. Like if you just stood up and pushed, if you pushed yourself off the chair and just started floating over there, it's going like that. It's got to be wild. As long as I make that sound while I float, if I don't make that sound, bro, I don't believe it. I want to do that. I would really want to do that, like to at least feel that sensation. I wonder if, dude, I can't even imagine like some of the fan, like imagine like you're the children. And this is kind of sad, but I don't mean it in like a real sad way. I guess I just mean it in some curiosity of emotion. Like your parent or your brother or something is like going up to the moon at that time. Because the challenger, like was it headed to the moon? The great question, huh? I feel like, I feel like yes, because where else would we be going? Bro, they were blasting people out. I don't know whatever. You know, they were just trying to get like shoot extra scenes for airbud up there. They were going up to the moon. The space shuttle was on a low earth orbit space truck and did not have the engine power or fuel capacity to reach the moon. No, the challenger was not headed to the moon. The shuttle mission that tragically ended in a disaster was scheduled for a six day mission in orbit around Earth to deploy a communications satellite and study Haley's comet. Dang. Imagine how excited you must have been. I wonder if they were scared before. Is there any interviews of those people right before they left? Oh, geez, yeah. Just to also kind of honor them a little bit. What date did that happen as well, Trevon? Do you know? 80, I feel like it was like mid, mid 86. Wow. 86. We're coming up on a 40 year anniversary of it. First ordinary citizen. I mean, are you expected to be the ordinary speaker who was out there? That was a year after Amiens 2. Shackling got married. That was what? Two months after Amiens 2. Shackling got married. Okay. This is Christa McAuliffe. The teaching profession in students and the whole country is really going to benefit from this. We hopefully are going to know an awful lot more about what life is like aboard the shuttle. Cold coffee. Sounds like she's from Rhode Island. A little bit. Where was she from? Yeah, you were right. Probably pretty close. Isn't that close? That's really close. Still close. Close enough. Yeah. Rhode Island. It's right there. She reminded the lady. It was like cold coffee, ice coffee. You seen that lady? I think we talked about this before. You haven't? No. Bring up the lady at the Dunkin Donuts at Burn Down. Sorry. This is the problem with the internet, dude. We're trying to pay homage to Christa McAuliffe. And then bring up that, yeah, Dunkin Donuts. You see this? You haven't? Well. When my boy Dutch, dude, you ever seen this? No. This is a jail on this. I got to tell the lore of it. Jim Norton put us on this. And this is carried on now for like almost 10 years when a Dunkin Donuts burned down in Shemokin. Coffee shop in Shemokin is closed following an arson over the weekend. Police say a teenager is responsible for all that damage. He's watched 16th Nikki Crye's, joined us live from the Central Pennsylvania Newsroom with more tonight, Nikki. Julie, a lot of people in Shemokin are upset that Dunkin Donuts is closed because they didn't have anywhere else to go for coffee and donuts. Today we also learned new information about the teenage girl police charged with setting the place on fire. Yellow tape surrounds the Dunkin Donuts on West Sunbury Street in Shemokin. The popular donut shop is closed until further notice because of extensive fire damage. There's a lot of people that's definitely going to miss it. No doubt about it. A teenager is charged with starting a fire inside the restaurant on Saturday night. Shemokin police officer Ray Psycho says no one was caught. Ray Psycho? But the place has extensive damage. Psycho says the fire was started inside the women's bathroom. The toilet paper dispenser was lit on fire and within about a minute, the entire place was filled up with smoke. It feels fake. Mother did explain that she's recently been put on new medication. Ray Psycho? For what reason? You would like a Psycho? The 13-year-old who admitted to setting the fire is currently at a juvenile detention center. They're showing blurred pictures of them? This is the best of the squad. This is the best of the squad. The Dunkin Donuts is closed. Now I have to rely on myself to go to maybe a turkey hill or something where I don't like their donuts. I rather the donuts at Dunkin Donuts. And I can't deal with it, but I really miss Dunkin Donuts. I go there every day. I miss... Oh, this guy's the best, huh, boy? Then my boy Dutch Smith right here, bro. Chicken Baker croissant, where I get some coffee, power rate, if I'm dehydrated, I sit there all the time. If I have any legal work that I need to do, I go there. I meet with my attorneys there. Play of the act. Legal work? He said legal work? I sit there all the time. If I have any legal work that I need to do, I go there. I meet with my attorneys there. I meet with my attorneys. And then this is a lady. And Jim Norton dressed up like this lady for Halloween. No, no, did he? Yeah, one year, which was the best thing I've ever seen. I hope he does it again, allegedly. And let's start the beginning of her again. I'm going to miss that place if it don't open up. Damn, my little friends go in there, get the cold coffee, the iced coffee, I guess it's called. People miss their... Yeah, there you go. Oh my god. The cold coffee, dude. But when she said, cold coffee, it reminded me a little bit of a... Of McColl's. What's her face? Yeah. Oh, and go look at the comments on there. Is there any great comments on their Google reviews? There's gotta be. Oh, so funny. Went for a doughnut, place burned down. No, I said that. No, no, I'm saying it. Two stars. Here we go. Not open due to being set on fire, but otherwise a classy place to hydrate. Or so I'm told, that's Nicholas Sordy right there. Now I have to rely on myself to go to maybe a turkey hill where I don't like their doughnuts, or I'd rather the doughnuts at Dunkin' Donuts. And I'm kind of dealing with it, but I really miss Dunkin' Donuts. Shout out, Felix Sweartow. Oh, it's the best, dude. Dude, you said Air Bud before and made me think like... There were so many dog movies when I was growing up. So many dog celebrities, right? Rinse in tin. Rinse in tin, right? Yeah, the Chihuahua, you know, the... Are there any more... They talk about Chihuahua. Yeah, what happened? Inbrun? They talk about Chihuahua again? They talk about Chihuahua. You don't remember him? I remember him! I brought him up! Turner and Hooch. What happened to Dog Hollywood? What happened to Dog Hollywood? Lassie, Benji, Kujo, Clifford, Air Bud, Spud's McKenzie, it was all these dogs, like big, big dog personalities. Heath Cliff, Snoopy. Snoopy. Uh... Yeah, there's more. Yeah, there's more. There's more. All dogs go to heaven. There was a lot... Oh, Turner and Hooch. Turner and Hooch. But I'm saying like, there were like big, bankable dog stars. Right. They don't see that much anymore. That's a great point. Yeah, I wonder what happened? Why are there no more animal stars in Hollywood? Animal stars are disappearing from Hollywood primarily due to the rise of sophisticated CGI and AI. Ah... I don't know if I feel like that's true though. Yeah, I mean, yeah, because it's not the same. You don't need to... You know what I mean? Right, people know the love of a dog. They want that. Yeah, you can't replace it. Right, yeah. I think we're primed and ready for our next big dog star. Oh, imagine the tour he would go on. Is Air Bud still doing it? I don't know. I know I read the other day that they're gonna get... That some dogs now live longer based on some new medicines that they're giving them. They can live a lot longer. Really? And some people were happy about it and some people apparently were not. They were only expecting their dog to live for so long. Well, that's... I want a dog, but I can't get one right now. I gotta wait till I stop touring so much and the kids will look. But I want a dog, but one of the reasons I'm hesitant is because... You're really starting to settle for a heartache in like 10 to 12 years or something. My dogs all died eight years, 10 years, 12 years, 14 years, you know what I mean? I mean, if that's a real thing, like if they're giving them medicine or whatever to help them live longer, I'll buy into that. Yeah, we looked that up for me. Hamsters and grandparents. So it's like how children learn about death a lot of times, you know? Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's like you need that element to teach your kid to give your kid a... You know, a gateway to death or whatever, like a way to see it. But they had Sounder. That was a huge movie. Remember that? They had Old Yeller. Old Yeller. That's another one. That was a huge movie. Old Yeller, yes. That was a huge movie. Yeah, that was massive. That was back in the little house on the prairie times. San Francisco Biotec company Loyal is developing drugs aimed at extending dogs' healthy lifespans by lowering high levels of the hormone IGF1, which accelerates aging in larger dogs. The leading candidates, including the Daily Pill, their leading candidates, including the Daily Pill, LOY002. The drugs work by reducing levels of insulin-like growth factor 1, a hormone that drives rapid growth in young dogs, but contributes to faster aging and shorter lifespan in larger mature dogs. I thought you'd be asking me. Oh, no, I just saw some information about this the other day that was really interesting. What else was in the news that was something that was kind of worth discussing? I don't know if we want to go down too many heavy roads. Has there been something your children have wanted to ask for that you had to say no? Just tell me what some of that's like. Give me something from the parenting world, because I'm just curious about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My daughter went through a sleep regression recently. Sleep what? Regression. Okay. So she just slept through the night fine, but they start developing, their brain starts developing, they start having dreams, and they get a little more like, they start to understand stuff more. So we'd watch Home Alone all the time. She loves Home Alone. And she just saw it at face value. She loved it. She knew what was going on. She was two, but she got everything. She got a little older, and then she started out of nowhere, even though she watched Home Alone 50 times, she started to get scared from it, from Marvin Harry. Yeah. So one day she kept saying in the car, she'd be like, Dad, are Marvin Harry following us? Out of nowhere one day. And I'm like, no, they're not. Marvin Harry after us? Oh, that's scary. And I'm like, they're not after us at all. They're after Kevin's toys. So trying to make it, you know what I mean? Oh yeah. All right, but are they going to come for me? I'm like, no, Marvin Harry are fun. They just have to Kevin's toys. Kevin's going to put them through the ringer. It's all good. And then like in the middle of the night, she's like, Dad, Dad, I'm scared because there's another comment. She's like, are Marvin Harry coming? And I'm like, my wife's like, you shouldn't have made her watch Home Alone. I'm like, she loved it. It wasn't until recently that she started getting scared. But she'll call and be like, so you can't go up there. You have to go up there. Like this is what got really hard. Like going up there, like they're always testing the limits of what they can control and not control and pushing boundaries. So that's the whole few years is like they're pushing boundaries. So they try to see what they can get over on you. Like so if they want you to come upstairs and they cry and that brings you upstairs, they know that they can get you upstairs every time. You have to break that habit. You have to like, so there's times where it's like, she's like crying and like, Dad, please come upstairs. And I'm like downstairs and like you can't go up. And it's the worst feeling because you want to run. It's like, but you know, it's a trap. It's a trap. But like, but also she's cunning. Like she'll say shit that she knows are going to tug at my heartstrings. I'd have to ignore her crime. And she'll start saying stuff like, Dad, please, Dad, I need you. I miss you. Right. The ship is leaving the shore. Just things that she's seen. And you're like, I'm like literally like downstairs. Like she doesn't see me, but I'm like right under the door. Me and my wife are sitting there and I'm just like, I got tears in my eyes. I'm just like, I need to go. You can't. It's tough. It's tough. So apparently, so yeah, you got to really like, I guess you have to be the diet. You have to sometimes you have to be the leader, huh? And sometimes you want to just be the buddy. I want them to be able to like, they want to sleep. She'll be like, please, can I come sleep with you guys? I want to, I want her to do that so bad, but like we can't do it because like it opens up, you know, like then it's like, you know, oh yeah. But some, I know families sleep, they're all the kids sleeping in the bed and that's that. But like, you know, it could be tough. Like if you have, we have work and travel a lot and stuff again. Yeah. So if you're not a little house on the prairie, then that's kind of like back then. Yeah, you need it for warmth and stuff. And it's like that. Yeah. But I want to do it, but I, so far we haven't done it because I just feel like I don't want to start bad habits, you know, but. And is it tough with like, with your wife's debate on what are good habits and bad habits? Or do you guys communicate? I want the same page. It's pretty, it's pretty straightforward, you know, like, but it's, you gonna, you want kids? Yeah. Yeah. We talked about this online. You should have kids. Yeah, I'm gonna have some kids. If you do, like, if you want kids, have kids, you know, like. I think I do. I mean, I think the most you can get to is like, I think I want them. I really, I like, nobody's like, if you're like yelling in the park or whatever, I want kids, you're gonna go, you know, or you're gonna get elected. But if you're just like, yeah, but so I think the safest thing I say, yeah, I think I really like to have kids. I have to have a spouse that is like, we can go down that road together. And then, you know, some of it, I think it's like, if that's going to be part of God, if God wants that for me in my life, you know, and if I'm willing to set my life up enough where it's a possibility, because God, I don't think he would, he would bless me with children if it wasn't like a safest environment either, you know. Sure. I think you should do it. I always tell you that. But yeah, I would like to have, I think more and more, I would like to have that. Yeah. You know, I would like to have the chance to love something that's different and to have like a new different type of like connection in the world, you know, just to experience what connections there are, because it's, I'm sure it's like totally different. I mean, last time you hear you were saying just how different it is. Yeah. Yeah, you got to do it. You got to do it, especially if you want it, because it's nothing better. You'll be, you'll feel so fulfilled, man. Yeah. Yeah, you'll feel so fulfilled. And I want probably six or five kids, bro. I know. It's like when you start having you, you'll see, or yeah, you'll see like you won't, you want as many as possible. It's that that's why people just keep having them. Dude, in the old days, man, people had them were reckless, abandoned. Bro, people would have a kid. They'd be like, oh, where's my kids? They'd be at the store. They would leave a kid. They'd have to come back. Hey, we left a kid in your shelf or whatever. Yeah. Some kids in the freezer. He's just like, yeah. People used to have kids back in the day, so many kids that like some of them would just like. Parish. Parish. And then they were just like, ah, we lost a couple of them. Yeah. You know, Albert Staden. We still have 10 of them, but we lost a couple. Yeah. Albert Staden Mankato. We didn't, we hadn't seen, you know, he stayed around. He wandered off and we hope he's all right. I know he wandered off from Rochester. Yeah, look, he had a bag of food with him. You know, you're like, that's crazy. I don't know how you focus on, you had it. How many siblings you got? I just had one, two, three, four, three total. Okay. What'd you have? Besides me, three. Yeah. Yeah. That's a fun amount. Yeah. You sure you're a family? You had four of you guys still together? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. If you could go back and be a kid, what's one moment you would go back to when you're child? Like, like, uh, was it like a birthday party or a time or like, it could just be a general. It doesn't have to be specific either. Yeah. Like what was like the funnest holiday you guys had or something? Was there one that was just. Going to my grandma, my grandma will host Christmas and like all the cousins would come over and that was fun because she had like this really old house that was a two family with a big basement and a big old attic. Yeah. And we all used to go up in the attic and cause like high jinks and hide and shit. And like, I just heard like that those, those days were the best days where you could just like run around the house playing hide and seek and like feel like it was the best thing that ever happened to you. Yeah. Yeah. Just not all this bullshit. Like you didn't know anything yet. It was just about playing hanging out, you know, I know. Yeah. It seems like it should be able to be such a simpler world. Doesn't it? That's the thing that I think gets me a lot. It's like, go hang out in the woods. Yeah. Yeah. Like when I was young, there was like, it was so much less like, like underdeveloped. And there was just like, wood everywhere. Patches of woods everywhere. Oh, it was native of American shit. You'd have a guy to chisel a fucking couple of tits into a, you know, into a birch tree or whatever you'd have somebody, you know, there was like a grave somewhere. Somebody just a couple of tits and just buried somebody. Like the woods used to be crazy, bro. Cause you'd see some guy been living there. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. There'd be some pornography or whatever. Pornography. Yeah. Always. Somebody buried pornography, but they, you know, they draw like an arrow. It's like, hey, pornography. So they didn't forget what it was. It was like, dude, that's where I saw my first porn. I was in the woods. Oh, everybody, which is crazy, bro. You're right there with nature, dude. Oh dude, I remember the first time I masturbated, bro. I didn't even know what was going to happen with like your body. And I remember like something kind of like kind of came outside of my body. And I remember trying to put it back into my penis with my finger. Yeah. And I heard my mom like downstairs and I was like trying to get it all back in. Before she, yeah. So yeah, I was like, yeah. So obviously, yeah, I had a lot of intimacy issues over the years, bro. Let's get this question. Let's get this answer in, dude. Early 1800s. Let me see. Over the past three centuries, the average number of children per women in most of the world has declined sharply, roughly from five to seven kids per woman in the early 1800s to 2.25 per kids per woman today in many countries. I think it's even less than that now. Yeah. I think I've read something where I said like people are having the least amount of kids that in history right now. Maybe there'll be a rebirth of it, you know, maybe there'll be something new that happens. I do. Do you feel like I feel like, you know, I didn't want to get into like important, like heavy stuff today, but there's just like, it feels like it's a tough time in the world for a lot of people. Dude, do you imagine like Octo mom? You like you have eight babies in your stomach. You get you get birth to eight babies at the same exact time. That's dark shit. Look at and look at that thing she had on her bro. It's like whenever you ever see that spider that's got the big thing on it, like it's pregnant. Yeah, that's wild, bro. Like imagine you have no kids and then you have eight kids. Yeah. I think she already has like five kids. Oh my god. Are you serious? Yeah, just watch the documentary on that. How do you how do you give the time you need to each of these kids? Yo, what do you do when you you want people like like they like guess what twins and they're like, oh my god to how are we going to do this like eight bro eight. How do you even how do you even what's the first thing you do when there's eight there's eight two day old babies. That was the first thing you did. It's like they're like Tamagotchi's like you like literally just have to like check the batteries on all of them. Holy shit. Dude, get you some ice coffee, cold coffee, ice coffee. You have a Tamagotchi. No, I never have one. Do you remember that? Oh, I do remember them and it didn't hit us super hard. Our family. I was a little older. We weren't into like a lot of the Asian kind of stuff that much. We was like doing whole Kogan type of shit. Dude, I remember I had to do a roast of this of the naughty Asulemon who is the Octomom who had eight children who was kind of a celebrity for a while was it or not a celebrity. I mean, everybody's kind of a celebrity these days, but she was like kind of in the limelight or whatever, you know, for that. Yeah, we had a roaster and dude, I remember I got there and I thought it'd be fun and everything and you get there. You're like, oh, this feels there's part of it that feels really mean. Oh, really? Do you mind writing the jokes? I mean, they were I mean, yeah, some of them were probably good and some of them were probably not good. What scenario was she being? Why was she being roasted? It was just a kind of it was the Ha Ha Comedy Cafe over there and over there. Yeah, in Burbank. Yeah. Or it's kind of off of a brilliant self-language from I think, but um, yeah, Jack Jr. his family over there at the club. It's a great spot. Yeah, I've done some stuff. Yeah. And so, um, but they had the roast of her there and it was other people were on the the day at the docket or whatever and it just like it was interesting. It was fun. Yeah. But it was also like there was a moment you're like, oh, this is me because they're sitting right there and you think like the kids were there. Bro, it's like eight kids just staring at your rip on them. That'd be crazy, bro. She was she was there. She was there, but it was just kind of a lot, bro. And I couldn't tell if she was trying to flirt or whatever. And I was like, I'm getting out of here. You know, yeah, you can't. You can't even you need to wear two condoms. Oh, I wouldn't even sneak. God forbid. You got, yeah, you can't even sneeze. I wouldn't even let an eyelash fall out of her. The next thing you know, you have eight children. Oh, and blessings to her children. Let's get a gander at a moment to see him. And who knows now she may, you know, I can't imagine what that's like no way. Updated. Oh, is that them now? They all look like. Wow, they look healthy and good. Yeah, they look like they all. Like they look like they weren't one of eight. Yeah, they look like they were their own. Imagine how that's got to be to break out of like, you know, I mean, how much could they have weighed when they were born? Yeah, you got eight kids in there. You got eight kids. I probably I would guess how much they weighed. Let's guess and we'll and we'll wage whoever wins. What's the price? I don't know. Do something for like, uh, moon research or whatever. $30 towards moon research. 30 towards moon research. Okay. I think it's probably going to end up somehow going to Israel. But we'll just we'll call it moon research. I think, um, you got size eight. If there are five, there's no way she can be used. This is a good game show question. There's yeah, it is right. There's no way she can be walking around with the average kid when they're born is like six, seven pounds, right? So there's no way she's walking around with 50 pounds of kids in there. Right. Yeah, that's since that's a lot. Now look at the you can get a gander at it right there. When she got that front really launched and that thing. Yeah, yeah. Crazy. Oh, so. I'm going to say, I'm going to say they were about a day. I'd be throwing my three and a half pounds each. Something like that. You want three and a half. I'm a go. I'm a go. Yeah. 3.15. That's still crazy. That's still 20 something pounds a kid in there. Oh, you're right. You're right. Yeah. That's crazy. Have a good one. But they can't be much less than three pounds. I'm going 2.2. All right. 2.2, which means for eight kids, she was still holding around 17 pounds. Yeah. 17 pounds. 17 pounds. That's 2.2 was a small kid. Well, does it. Can we find out? 3.4. No way. The Solomon Octopulets before. Octopulets. Octopulets. Born on January 26, 2009, weighed between one pound, eight ounces, and three pounds, four ounces. Oh, so some of them. That's double the other kid. A one pound, eight ounce kid is wild, bro. That's wild. When were they born? 2009. That's about 24 years after this. Amiens 2 Shanklin got married. Hey, God bless the Shanklins. And we wish to million more years. If you ever get to meet with them, man, I want to see the tape of you guys meeting up together. So you got Manouche, your new show. Manouche's new show and foul play. Foul play is on now on TBS. People can check it out with Anthony Davis. And he's in every episode? Yeah. Okay, great. He's in every episode. All of the athletes and stars and stuff like that. Yeah, I'm on tour, salvocanocomedy.com for tickets. Got up to June announced, but I'm going to be doing all of Canada in October, and I'm going to be doing UK and Europe in 27. Yeah, yeah. And then probably come back around and get the last few cities I haven't gotten to here, maybe film this next special, maybe in Boston or something like that. I love Boston. Yeah. Do you think your family will go hit the road with you? I'm going to try to maybe take them out to the UK. Yeah. Yeah, I'll visit Ari out there and stuff. Oh, yeah. So that should be fun. And then, yeah. And then what else? I guess, yeah, the Joker's will be out starting July. It'll be season 13. It's crazy. Well, you guys can find everything. We'll share all the links, man, and we'll share everything for you, dude. And Sal, thanks for coming and just spending time with us and... Of course, man. Thanks for having me. I love you. It's kind of cool. I love you too, man. And thanks for just telling us about the Shankmans and just... Let's find them. I can't wait. Yeah, I got to look. We got to... You're going to help me find them. Amy and Stu. The Shankmans, they're looking for you. All right, blessings, bro. Thank you so much. Got it, baby.