My Neighbor ABANDONED Her Dog Outside My House Whilst She Went To Party | r/Relationships

It's the King of Cork City! I'm BBC Eye Player. There's only one way to get rich room here. Yes, boy, I like it. Become proper gangsters. I was going to say get jobs. The boys are back. We're looking to expand the organisation. We are performing a bit of a gang. What's going on here? Yeah, gang, gang, gang. The new series of The Young Offenders. I'm going to be a bad boy forever. Watch on BBC Eye Player. Hi, it's Jessie and Lenny from Table Manners, and our podcast is sponsored by Innocent Orange Juice, which they reckon can help you get a better start to your day. I'll be honest, Mum, when I heard that, I thought it sounded very unrealistic. It's not like you can stop your kids getting jam all over that nice, clean shirt, or your keys disappearing from the exact place where you definitely left them. But they're not saying some juice can stop the chaos. It just helps you get some good stuff into your family whatever the morning's doing. Each 900 milliliter bottle contains 13 squeezed oranges and nothing else. So even on the messiest of starts, you can shrug and say, well, at least we've had some fruit, no chopping, no blenders, no worries. Well, apart from where you left your keys, which have actually been in your hand the whole time, Innocent Orange Juice is a source of vitamin C which contributes to the normal function of the immune system. It enjoys part of a healthy lifestyle and balanced diet. Hello, it's Emily Dean from Walking the Dog here, and this podcast is sponsored by The Woodland Trust. Walking in the woods with my dog Ray has become one of my favorite ways to clear my head. There's something about being around trees that makes the whole world feel a bit more peaceful. That's why I love the work of The Woodland Trust who protect and restore our precious woodlands. And you can support that work in such a lovely personal way by dedicating a tree, bench, post, or area of Woodland to someone special. From a suggested donation of just 20 pounds, it's a thoughtful lasting gift that helps woods and wildlife thrive. Visit woodlandtrust.org.uk slash walkingthedog to start your dedication. Full teas and seas apply. 2 months ago Have three young kids. This is important later. At first my neighbor was very nice and popped in once in a while to see how we're settling in. This was fine. Now her and her daughter, 23, are calling in two to three times a day, asking to borrow something from me or to do them a favor. It's never anything huge but it is really annoying. I've tried not answering the door but they walk around the house peering into windows until they get the aforementioned children's attention and they will ask the kids to answer the door. I've told them that I am very busy and don't have time. Nothing changed. I've tried to be nice but firm, but I am really quiet and non-confrontational. As I am in this house for at least the next two years, I don't want to fight with them. The last straw was today when the mother asked me to mine their dog for today, tonight and all day tomorrow so she could go out to a party. I said no. I have two cats and they dislike dogs greatly. She came back twice more. I stuck by my guns and refused. She tied the dog on my gate and went to a party. What the hell read it? Help. How do I nicely make her go away? Edit. Thank you all for answering. I really didn't expect so many responses. You guys are great. I kept the dog inside last night because it wasn't her fault and I felt guilty leaving it out. The dog didn't settle at all. I finally got asleep at half five this morning so I'm just exhausted. Add enough and I'm going to have it out with her today. I've decided to tell her that a damn dog kept me up all night and the next time that she pulls that stunt she won't see the dog again. I will call the ISPCA. She doesn't need to know that. And I'm going to tell her that I've had enough of her and that she isn't welcome anymore. If she knocks on my door again I'm calling the police. I will update on the reaction and whether it works or not. On a side note I'm bloody terrified. Thanks again to everyone. As absolutely unhinged behavior all the way through, I mean hearing through the windows has some horror movie level shit. And I think it's just one of those cases where the neighbour knows that you're a nice person, you want to be nice and is going to exploit it to a advantage every single time. The dog abandonment is where it goes from this unhinged annoyingness to getting the authorities involved if you can and calling the ISPCA which I'm assuming is like an animal welfare people. We have RSPCA in the UK and I think like OP said towards the end there absolutely be infirm with her and saying you want nothing to do with her anymore because she's not going to respect the polite no when she's already ignored loads of them already and now you're just being completely reasonable by laying down your boundaries to her and telling her to basically piss off. Spring Plum says to the OP you will not be able to nicely make her go away. If nice was a word in her lexicon she wouldn't do shit like you posted. Take photos of her peering in your windows. Next time she walks around your property off sidewalk call the police for trespassing. She's exhibiting stalker-like behaviors. OP says I'm going to tell her not to call in anymore as I'm very busy and she has too much with her requests but in smaller words she is not smart man thank you I need to grow a pair. Commodore says not sure how to make her go away but in terms of being left with the dog you should take it to a kennel or a dog sitter and leave her with the bill. It is not okay to leave a pet with someone else when they explicitly said no three times especially when they have legit reasons as you do. OP says thank you I just texted her and said that I was putting the dog outside for the night. She said no she can sleep in your bed. What? I'd have to charge says you text her back and tell her no you don't want a dog in your bed or in your house if she wants it to sleep in a bed she should not have went anywhere and left it with someone who said they couldn't take care of it. The dog will be outside when she gets back. You can let the dog stay inside if it is behaved and you feel bad for it but get up early and tired outside so she thinks it stayed out all night. I know you don't want to be rude but stop being her doormat. Tell the kids they're not allowed to open the door for anyone and there will be punishment if they do. If she asks to borrow things make a notebook and have a sign for what she borrows. More than one unreturned item means sorry you still have not returned this thing and I need it. I can't let you have anything else until I get this back. She wants to borrow a few eggs ask for a cup of sugar. Put up curtains she can't see through or write notes and take them in the windows please don't peek through my windows. I didn't answer the door because I'm busy try back in an hour. If she won't stop calling answer the phone and give it to the youngest most unable to speak child and tell them to talk about whatever they're excited about. My nephew can rattle on about Hot Wheels cars all day. She asks you for help sure I can get to that in about two weeks. She just comes over to chat and be nosy roper into whatever task you're working on. Sure I can talk but I need to get these clothes folded. Would you mind doing those towels for me while we talk or hand her a towel and a wet dish to dry. OP said I texted her back and said she is outside if you're not home by 10 a.m. I'll be leaving her outside your house as I have plans and will not be back home. After kids warned not to open the door I tried the cleaning plan before I saw her walk up my driveway so I started vacuuming she knocked I ignored it she walked around the house and got in the back door I forgot to lock it and she stood in the kitchen for 40 minutes as I hoovered the already clean house when I finished she was still there and it was time for me to collect the kids from school I got my kids and she asked for a ride to the shop I said no it's in the opposite direction of the school and she got angry I should point out it's a 10 minute walk to the shop I left her fuming on my doorstep where I found her when I came back 30 minutes later this is the level of crazy we are dealing with commenter replied to end that is creepy police time also stop being so sweet you don't know anything user suggestions previous posters have given someone says went hold to call animal control lopie says I'm in Ireland they work from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. it's almost 7 p.m. here looks like I'm stuck with this bloody thing for the night genua says remember that this isn't the dog's fault make sure it has water and shelter at least opie says the dog was taken care of last night she was inside all night despite my threatening to leave her out see I told you I'm a wuss so opie does come in with an update and says the original thread is here but basically long story short have an awful neighbor who won't take no for an answer and ended up leaving a dog with me despite being told I wouldn't take it first of all thank you everyone who answered I hadn't expected such a response you guys are brill I can't thank you enough for the suggestions and advice the dog kept us awake all night no matter what I tried and would not sleep or even shut up I finally got asleep at half five that morning so when the neighbor I'm calling her Mary rocked in yesterday afternoon to ask for some milk I was fit to kill I'd left the dog tied to a gate at 10 a.m. and sent her a text saying the same she didn't reply or mention it when she knocked at the door I'd locked the front door and warn the kids not to open it when I opened it she tried to walk in by me I didn't say anything but didn't let her in Mary said how was the dog for you isn't she a pet I told her that no the dog was not a pet in a bean and nightmare that we had gotten no sleep she replied that if I just let the dog sleep in my bed under the covers it would have been fine and the next time I should let her into my bed I kind of saw red at that point I didn't let my kids sleep in my bed mind the damn dog I told her there would be no next time that she ever left her dog tied to my gate again the dog would disappear she stood silently with her mouth open I went on to tell her that I was not the type of person to ask for favors from people I didn't know and I don't expect it to be done to me I finished by telling her that while I hope we can continue to get on she was not welcome in my house uninvited or asked me to do something for her she stormed off that was yesterday that I haven't seen her since but the day is young someone said to op on the back of this well done you just wondering what did you tell your kids regarding why they shouldn't let her in there's definitely a lesson to be learned in this experience op said I told them we had a new house rule and only parents could answer the door no matter who it was semi hollow says just curious what are some of the things they would call you about other than the dog op says milk sugar my weighing scales bread a cigarette a rite of the shops a stamp to use my washing machine you name it she asked for it not says wow just wow how far away from you our places to buy these things I never asked a neighbor unless they are a really good friend for one of these things op says a 10 minute walk she doesn't even drive but her legs are working just fine so it was a couple of weeks after this the op came in with another update and said hi guys I haven't updated for a while because things have been a bit crazy here's the original Fred and here is the first update and then shared the links again I want to thank you all for your messages support and advice you guys are the best after I had it out with her she backed off big time for a while for around the week she didn't come near me which was awesome but she isn't the sharpest tool in the box so it didn't last long last week she was having a party and came in to invite us in I said no thanks I should point out that she hasn't spoken to me since I told her that I wouldn't be taking her dog again so the invitation was completely out of the blue and honestly a bit weird anyway the party was last Friday night she must have tried to call in when I was collecting the kids from school because when I got home there was a note that said party starting at six bring kids Mary I didn't the party started and went on and on and on at 12 o'clock I went in and asked her to turn the music down it was blaring into a back garden and my kids bedrooms around the back of our house she said oh hi OP come on in I told her no thank you please just turn the music down my kids can't sleep she didn't and instead suggested that I get the kids and my husband and we all go to the party at midnight she thought it was a good idea to bring my kids into a house full of drunk strangers really anyway I went in twice more to ask her to turn down the music and I gave up and called the police when the cops arrived they turned it down for about five minutes long story short this happened a few times the music was basically turned off at half past four I met her the next day as I was getting into my car she said oh I hope that music didn't bother you last night I told her of course it bothered me I called into her numerous times and resorted to calling the police she said well it turned off at one o'clock I said no it was half past four she said well at least it was good music really anyway I told her that if it happened again I'll be speaking to her landlord and she hasn't spoken to me since it seems to be going in cycles she pushes her luck gets given out to socks for a week or two and then does it again we can't afford to move for another year or two so I'm stuck with a crazy bitch for a while I think that I just need to accept that I have a really horrible selfish neighbor and this behavior is just going to continue until I can afford to move hi we're back market we sell expertly refurbished tech like phones for talking to your friends or your AI chef if cheese won't stick to pizza add glue either way this expertly refurbished tech costs way less than you guaranteed by the back market promise one-year warranty and 30-day free returns on every purchase yum you are so good at this back markets where the world's shops refurbish tech hi it's jessie and lennie from table manners and our podcast is sponsored by innocent orange juice which they reckon can help you get a better start to your day I'll be honest mum when I heard that I thought it sounded very unrealistic it's not like you can stop your kids getting jam all over that nice clean shirt or your keys disappearing from the exact place where you definitely left them but they're not saying some juice can stop the chaos it just helps you get some good stuff into your family whatever the morning's doing each 900 milliliter bottle contains 13 squeezed oranges and nothing else so even on the messiest of starts you can shrug and say well at least we've had some fruit no chopping no blenders no worries well apart from where you left your keys which have actually been in your hand the whole time innocent orange juice is a source of vitamin c which contributes to the normal function of the immune system enjoys part of a healthy lifestyle and balanced diet so get this opi came into the post to update 11 years later and said hi all i'm op i love this sub and was a bit shocked to see my post in it which they came into the best of reddit or updates and says i love this sub and was a bit shocked to see my post in it i'd long forgotten about it and really should have updated i hope it's okay to do it here i was going through a lot at that time my kids were young my husband was back in college and we were trying to recover from the recession i think mary could see i was non-confrontational and in a bad place and thought i was an easy target my husband had lost his job and was in college but was going through a mental health crisis during this time so i was essentially dealing with it alone while trying to hold everything in my house together she continued asking for things and trying to call in i locked the gate and door and stopped opening it if i wasn't expecting someone she started messaging me on facebook i blocked her it went like that for a while and she slowly stopped trying occasionally she'd seen me out with her kids and come over to try and get me to do something or tell me some big drama she was having presumably to make me feel sorry for her but i just gray rocked her in the meantime i met a few other neighbors i tend to keep to myself who told me this was her tactic with anyone new and most of them didn't speak to her the cold shoulder eventually worked it was slow though but for about a year i had peace then she moved out well done to the person in the comments who said they'd never met an irish person who acted like that she wasn't irish and went back to her home country i'm still in that house 15 years later my husband is much better my kids are all in college my new neighbor is lovely we say a few words to each other when we see each other and when it was her child's communion she dropped in a cake and wine as there was going to be a party and she wanted to make sure i didn't mind the noise there was no noise i noticed on my word whenever we hear about neighbors like this it always brings me back to my childhood opi added a comment talking about their non-confrontational nature and said someone asked him did they ever get help for that opi said i did many years later i got cbt for ocd and we actually dealt with my non-confrontational nature an extremely low self-worth and a host of underlying mental health issues so you'll be happy to know i've since grown a shiny backbone thanks so much for your kind words and it's so nice to hear that for opi that they did grow their backbone in the end because i always find it particularly brutal in stories like this when people say oh you need to grow a backbone etc i know it's the case and that should happen for everyone but as op mentioned they had some other mental health stuff going on at the time and you know some people just find it difficult and other people were grown up avoiding conflict or were taught to be nice meaning never say no and having to push back is genuinely terrifying but for op in this who's pushed back years of conditioning that says confrontation makes you sort of the bad person that's some real strength right there so good on op in my opinion all i could think of whilst reading this and my our neighbor wasn't quite as bad still bloody grim it's the one that walked into our house because we used to have like an open door policy when we was younger i think the majority of us would still knock on the door before we walked in you know hey i'm here kind of thing i like during summer everyone sort of left their doors open and people were wandering and out of people's houses but there's one particular neighbor the one who came and sat on our sofa and basically picking her toenails at one point yeah i know it's absolutely fucking grim someone reminded me of this just and i haven't had the opportunity to talk about it and it's like i did a couple of seconds but she had this thing about going into people's houses even when they weren't there sometimes and once she went around to another neighbor's house when she had popped into town quickly to collect something and just started using her cooker cooking dinner because she had ran out of electric in those houses you had to like top up a little key and then put it into your electric meter to get electric and she had ran out so she thought you know fuck it i'm just popping random neighbors to do my cooking absolutely wild but what do you guys make of this story have you ever had a neighbor similar to this let us know your thoughts down in the comments below and let's move on to another story now our next story comes from busted him now what and says i 30 female just found my fiance 30 male on an online dating site what do i do my fiance i've been together a year and a half we moved in with one another a few months ago lately he has been a bit distant i've been cheated on in the past and have been really insecure with his change in behavior his assured me he is just stressed about working because his car broke down a couple of weeks ago and he hasn't gotten a replacement yet i couldn't let the nagging feeling go so i did a little investigating i didn't snoop on his phone or personal accounts but i made a fake profile on a popular dating site and found him there he was last online july 1st which sounds like it's four days from this post and says i don't know what to do how do i confront him what do i say can our relationship be saved do i even want to save it i feel like i'm a wreck right now commenter makes a suggestion to opn says honestly i would catfish him under your fake profile before confronting him so he can't later claim he never talks to women on there it was an old account he was looking on behalf of a friend etc i'm sorry opi says thank you i'm considering trying to catfish him commenter replies saying you don't need proof to leave him this isn't a court case you know what you saw and you know why he was on there i'm sorry he did this to you hoping to thrive says don't marry someone who's still out there dating unless you're okay with an open relationship if you confront him here say it belongs to a friend it was just a joke i forgot i even had it test him out on the website and see if he is active but it really does belong to someone else opi says i think that's what i'm going to do i texted an old high school friend he has never seen pics of to ask if i could use hers for my profile commenter replies saying if you go through all that i mean come on jump to the dump you caught him opi replies to another commenter saying he has never cheated on me before that was an x and the reason why i was so insecure about him acting weird that i did some digging around another commenter says don't listen to the people saying you should catfish him that's very immature print out the profile and ask him to explain his reaction will tell you what you need to know if someone is using his photo online i've seen this happen on catfish he'd be shocked and horrified if it's actually him 95 chance he'd be uncomfortable evasive or give you a bullshit excuse then you can leave him op says i'm 100 sure it's him all the interests of favorite food movies and music plus life aspirations match i just don't know when he wrote the profile not recent pics op adds edits and saying thank you everyone further investigating is leading me to believe that it is an older profile the pics aren't recent and i can positively date eight to nine of them before our relationship the last i'm not sure on the date i think that means a hacking slash signing in to try and delete the things scenarios is a little more plausible i don't think that in itself is good enough to break up over so i guess it is time to either confront or catfish or post an update thread to let you all know the outcome of whatever that may be edit two well people here are kind of split on it i took the advice to catfish i need to know for sure will update when and if anything comes of it edit three kind of major update his profile is gone i will be confronting him when he gets home from work so op did come in with what they titled their final update and says i posted a few days ago because i found my fiancee on an online dating site i took reddit's advice and catfished him a few hours later i set the bait i found his profile had been deleted when he came home from work i showed him the screenshot and asked him what was up long story short he was hanging out with his co-worker and the co-worker was frustrated was figuring out how to navigate the same dating site my fiancee signed into his old account opened in 2013 to try and help his friend figure it out apparently his lot has changed on this particular site and he realized that his knowledge on the site was too out of date so he logged out and that was it a few days later he saw it in his email that he got in a message from a woman on the site and then he deleted his account he obviously couldn't show me his dating site account but he did volunteer to show me his email account with all the alerts from the site the only woman had a message in recently was clearly my fake account he also realized that when we were looking through his email he had an unused profile on another dating site he signed in and deleted that one in front of me i fessed up about catfishing him he wasn't upset at all said he understood completely considering my history he was more upset with himself not realizing that his behavior would make me so insecure i apologize for not trusting him and catfishing he apologized for being so distant lately and not deleting his dating profile ages ago he offered an open phone slash social media and email policy between us in case we ever stumble across another trust but verify type situation shutter speed says to op what were you doing on this dating site if you don't mind me asking op says i was looking for him i had a history of being cheated on even with a few years of therapy under my belt i still have issues with implicit trust on my romantic partners it'd been acting off lately and i thought he might be cheating so i signed up for the site and immediately searched for him by adjusting the search filters for his age ethnicity heights zodiac sign etc i found him on the first page of results that was the only reason i was on the dating site commenter reply saying so have you found why he was acting off if he wasn't cheating op said yes he found out that his abusive father who is in no contact with has been diagnosed with a terminal illness and wants my fiance to contact him he's been spending a lot of time in his own head and a lot of alone time trying to decide what he wants to do about it commenter says he created the account with a plan to cheat when he got the message he bulked and deleted the account the fantasy of cheating was more appealing than the reality op your reply saying he created the 2013 confirmed via email history he was single when he created it commenter says life is good but you're so insecure you can't trust your boyfriend enough to have an adult conversation about this instead of going straight to catfishing i not only give this relationship six months tops unless you start handling problems in a healthy way this kind of situation will keep happening op says we've already been together a year and a half and have picked a wedding date commenter reply saying op may be marriage at a time when trust and communications need to be rebuilt is not a great idea you both need to develop a way to communicate and trust each other the situation can be way more intense when married what if he decides snooping as a bad quality what if you realize you really can't trust him op replied to another commenter saying sorry i don't think you can speak for all men my fiance has been super understanding of this situation he wants to work through it is not upset with me in the slightest sorry that two people choosing to stay together and work through things even when mistakes were made is so upsetting to you commenter says sweet baby lord jesus a lot of people on this thread need therapy op save your sanity and delete these threads op says i thought i was the crazy insecure and trusting one lol but seriously these were a few people in my original op there were a few people in my original op and in my pms who were very helpful and just plain awesome who asked for updates i'll leave this thread up for them at the end of the day i 100 believe that my fiance has been faithful and our relationship is now stronger for the experience i'm okay with letting the grumpy but grumpersons continue to whine about how much of a dog he is and how stupid i am for believing him or that i'm an insane piece of stalker trash on what not op says one more thing before she leaves this thread and says i did come here looking for advice that was what my entire op was about i took the advice to catfish him and the advice to confront him after following that advice the fact that he did not fall for the catfishing that he deleted the account on his own accord listening to his explanation hearing the sincerity in his voice recognizing his attempts to make sure no misunderstanding like this happens again seeing the hurt in his eyes because he recognized how upset i had been his willingness to be open with his phone and email going forward and a host of other things i do not believe he was cheating on me it is as simple as that i believe him i think you are projecting a lot here especially with that comment about getting pregnant and there was comments all over the place on this one some people saying this doesn't feel like completely resolved other people saying marriage isn't a great idea some people saying good on them they both were going through some incredibly human things and managed to work through it but what is your take on this matter what do you think let us know your thoughts down in the comments below now just a huge thank you for being here today getting involved in the stories your love your support your time it always means the absolute world to me so thank you so so much and hopefully i'll see you in the next one take care and much love so seconds that's the difference between life and death i've seen it first hand i'm javad abdummanem a doctor with medecins en frontier as conflicts continue to spread across the world it's crucial we connect fast as an msf doctor i may need to stop life-threatening bleeding treat gunshot wounds or care for blast victims all in a matter of seconds that's why at medecins en frontier we don't waste any time we're working in more conflict zones than you may be aware of giving everything to give people a chance just 30 pounds will keep our life saving work going please help save more lives because with trauma care every second counts you can buy us vital time please give just 30 pounds search msf doctor or call 0800 0557979 that's 0800 0557979 thank you hi we're back market we sell expertly refurbished tech like phones for talking to your friends or your ai chef if cheese won't stick to pizza add glue either way this expertly refurbished tech costs way less than you guaranteed by the back market promise one year warranty and 30 day free returns on every purchase yum you are so good at this back markets where the world's shops refurbish tech hi it's jessie and lennie from table manners and our podcast is sponsored by innocent orange juice which they reckon can help you get a better start to your day i'll be honest mum when i heard that i thought it sounded very unrealistic it's not like you can stop your kids getting jam all over that nice clean shirt or your keys disappearing from the exact place where you definitely left them but they're not saying some juice can stop the chaos it just helps you get some good stuff into your family whatever the morning's doing each 900 milliliter bottle contains 13 squeezed oranges nothing else so even on the messiest of starts you can shrug and say well at least we've had some fruit no chopping no blenders no worries well apart from where you left your keys which have actually been in your hand the whole time innocent orange juice is a source of vitamin c which contributes to the normal function of the immune system enjoys part of a healthy lifestyle and balance diet