How I Forgave Myself & How We Forgave Each Other | Korie Robertson | Al & Lisa Robertson

Hey there, welcome to Wawe That's Good. I hope you're having a great week, but it's about to get so much better because we have two great guests, Al and Lisa Robertson. Welcome. And be back. Good to be back. Again to Wawe That's Good. It's the first time with you though. Yeah, a new host in the chair. Yeah, we call it the elevated host. I mean, when you go to mom, that's that's impressive. Well, at least you said elevated not older. I bet you were going to say, this is my first rodeo for I know how this works. I was like, elderly elevated. Elevated. Yeah, you'll take that. Yes, yes, Sadie is 11 on baby kit and 11 just the mom life and recovering and all the things from C section and everything and just doing. Lisa's been having major baby kit envy because like we get the pictures and she's like wanting to be here. So this first time we've been home in a while. So I'm sure she's going to have some time. I've been holding on to her and a while ago I was telling the girls I said, you know, if kits around here somewhere, I could just hold her. You're in this interview. While we're doing the interview and we'd be perfectly fine. We should do that. Just hold kit the hold up. That's right. She is so sweet. Yes. And Sadie's just doing great. Now mom of three little girls which is a little bit crazy. You know, I can't believe that mom. I told Christian I said, Oh, that's three. Christian, do you know why you have three little girls? And he said, Noah, and I said, because God trust you. He trust you with the lives of three little girls. And I said, so hang on to that and you know, be that dad that protects those little girls. And he said, he said, thanks for saying that. No. Which is so much better than what dad used to say to me who had two daughters. He said, well, you know, somebody has to shoot the light loads when we go running. I mean, I was like, I don't even know what that means. What does that mean? I don't know, but it was embarrassing. You know, it was like, Hey, he's still, you know, I don't know. So it's that's way better. Thank you. It is. I told Jay the same thing. I mean, Jay, you got three little girls. It's because God trust you didn't protect them and to raise them right. So good. So good. Well, I'm glad you're back. This is awesome. I'm excited to sit down and talk and how you have a like new, let's see, how should I word it? Well, I'm doing lighter version of yourself. That's the best way to put it. See, we're giving a compliment. It's the lighter version of out. You were not that big, but you was not. How much, how much do you tell me? So let me tell you this. So it's really funny because I have not seen William forever. And so the other day we're filming because we're all right here together. You know, that has changed right over there and duck car rooms over there and duck dynasty goes on here. And so they were filming a duck dynasty episode, but in the podcast room. So the door is open. I mean, that's going on. It's kind of chaos. And in fact, I think you guys are even over here. And so when I wall by to go to the restroom, Willie, they're filming. They're insane because size railing about something. And so Willie bored, probably. You know, he's looking. He sees me wall by and he looks and then he does it like a double take. I saw the double take and as I'm walking by, I never stopped. But I just chuckled because I thought well, that's the first time he's seen me. So it wasn't 10 minutes before they took a break. He's busting down the door at a shame. It just so happened that we have what I call my fat scientist because she was the person who dreamed up my diet in the lab someplace that the PhD lady. Yeah. After actually she was on the podcast that day. So he got to meet her and she even said she said, well, if you ever need us, you know, I was like, woo, wow. She just did that in front of me. She actually just gave in that little. Yeah. It did fit, you know. So he just turned a little red and moved on. But yeah, so I've lost about almost 70 pounds. Wow. Yeah, since the last time I was here, just in my big health week, this week, all my numbers are good. So I'm feeling great. Amazing. They told me that just this morning I had my last check up and they said not heard about my testosterone, which we talked about yesterday on the podcast with John Luke and Christian. As we also had a jujitsu guy on there too. And these are all, everybody's all muscled up. Well, not so much John Luke. He fits more into me. He's got a smart brain. But you know, we were talking about you being a high T episode. And so, ever I was laughing. And then we talked about Abraham being a high T because you know, he had a kid and a hundred Christians thought that was fun. I said, well, you never know, Christian. But we, so today she told me my testosterone was like I was in my 30s instead of 60. And I said, well, there you go, babe. I already knew it. I only saw what was bragging about that yesterday. I will say we did a podcast and Lisa did bring up your sex life. Oh, good. imported that we can still talk about. Yeah, I said, losing weight is good for your sex. It is. Yeah, it is. It's a self-perfect way to talk about my hands off of him. We don't talk about testosterone a lot on this podcast. Well, I tell the people. Before the estrogen conversation. I tell the people here, I said, now, when you're walking down the hall, there's testosterone over here today. And there's estrogen over there because you guys were in here. And then Martin, you know, Martin, Mr. Smart, he said, with everybody, I said, no, just the guests. I didn't say anything about me or Jason or Zach. You know, we're, we're getting into those low T years. But that was where I found out. That's great. That's awesome. Well, cool. But that's, that's amazing. I could, I mean, I would not have guessed 70 because 70 pounds. I mean, of course, like, I didn't realize that you had not big, but no, but that's amazing. Yeah. You look great. Me either. And so today, he came out of the house, because Aynann is at our house with Kay. And so he came through and he didn't have a shirt on. He just had his shorts on. And Aynann goes, wow, you can really tell when you don't have your shirt on. And I said, I know, Aynann. And then she said, now I see why you're always right there with him and got your hands on him. And I said, yeah, he's made me think I may have an underwear modeling thing gig going out of the nursing home now after I was mom and I and I got the reactions. I'm like, the cat, the cat calls. The big head with the 70s and 80s craft. You never know where life's going to take. You just got to appreciate it, Cory. At this point, I need a new career at 60. That may be the thing. Underwear modeling at the OFO. That's great. Well, speaking of new career, we should talk about a segue that into what we have that's coming up that we're really excited about and something that I want to talk to you all about and get to share first here with the listener. This is first. This is the first. Yeah, this is like exclusive news. So we are in talks about a movie about Chelsea's story. Yeah. And I'm really excited about that. And of course, I know Y'all's life story and have lived a lot of it. Yes. And I'm so grateful to have gotten to live a lot of it and to see just the impact of Y'all's life on us. I talked about that when we did a podcast recently, just the impact of Y'all's life and your marriage and what that had on Willie Nye and our marriage. And just stick into it and forgiveness and grace and all these things that y'all showed us and lived by example. And that how it impacted our life. But I know that your story has impacted a lot of people. And that's a lot of what you're doing right now. So I just wanted to kind of get into that. What are you doing right now? How has the things that God has taught you or the things that you've been through? Just how are you? How are you feel like you're using that for his glory now? Because that's the goal, the hope for all of us that we can take the things that we're hard in our life and bond the gold in them. Messes that become messages. That's right. That's right. Well, we still speak around the country at pregnancy centers doing right to life, fun razors, things like that. Because whenever I was 16, I had an abortion. And so now I feel as though since God has redeemed me of those past sins and the messes that I made, I feel like now that's what I'm supposed to do. I'm supposed to share that because he healed me. And once you're healed, I feel as though that's what God wants you to do. And so we still do that. We still do marriage ministry. Again, that was 15 years into our marriage. And I had an affair and nearly split us up. We were apart for about six weeks, but we got back together. We decided that I decided that I needed to change my life, that I was not the Christian that I thought I was. I mean, I really wasn't. I had not given my life to Christ. I'd given my life to Al. And that was great, but he was not my savior. And I needed to give my life to a savior. And so I gave my life to Jesus. And so then that turned our marriage around. And then we've helped lots of couples through our church with their marriages, problems in their marriage. And then we go out and do marriage retreats, our marriage refresh, whatever somebody wants to call it. Conferences. Yeah, conferences. And then we do, if somebody calls and says, hey, can you come and do a ladies' day? Sure. Or can you come and talk to the guys, do a sportsman's banquet, then ask like sure. And so we're still out there doing that. And you know, really just bringing hope, I think, to people who these days are just, you know, sort of hopeless. I remember whenever we started low, and I had all the what is, what if I fell, what if it isn't where I need to be? And looking back, I can see so clearly that God had his hand in the whole thing. Starting something new is exciting, but it's also very scary. And that's why I'm thankful for Shopify. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world. And 10% of all e-commerce in the US from massive brands to tiny startups. Team Low starts on Shopify every single day for managing inventory and staying on top of orders. It just works. You can build a beautiful online store with templates that actually match your vibe. And their AI tools are game changers. They help write product descriptions, page headlines, even enhance product photos. Plus everything's in one place. So inventory, payments, analytics, and they have a 24-7 customer support. It really feels like you have a built-in business partner. I think it's so amazing for anyone starting out of business. This is the place to do it. Like I said, we do it for low. Duck Commander does it. It's just honestly very simple and does everything for you. It's time to turn those what ifs into, with Shopify today, sign up for your $1 per month trial today at Shopify.com slash woe. Go to Shopify.com slash woe again, that Shopify.com slash woe. And I think, you know, I know we talked to Sadie and did a couple of episodes about kind of our whole story. And sort of what we took forward from that, especially in the early days here, because we were in a full-time ministry. So we went through everything. We went through, you know, in that glass bubble of the church setting. And I don't know if, you know, people know this or not. But you and Willie both worked on staff with me for many years. You were our children's ministry. You and I worked together first, and then Willie came on later and worked with college kids and teens. And years out cherished. I mean, those years we got to do ministry together so good. Did the same with Jason and Missy early when we were interns and first out of school. And now we all worked together on the back end of all this, you know, in ministry. And now we're all doing our own thing. But, and yet we're all still, you know, a family and we love each other, which is great. But our ministry really started just kind of as a triage. We're in trouble. We don't know what to do. We were ER. You know, we were like people coming in saying, we're a mess. And she's had an affair. He's had an affair. What do we do? And then us light not only sharing with them what God had done in our lives, but then getting them to some people could help them long term, you know, beyond just us. Because we had people and I'm wonderful counselor that helped us. And so it was kind of like that. And then eventually, after you heal for a few years, you get an opportunity to tell your story. And so for us to start right here at our church, and I'll never forget the first Sunday, we shared our testimony. And everybody had lived it so they knew it. But they were so proud of us because like, look, it's been five years or whatever it was then. Well, out of that, somebody said, well, you come share that at our church. And here we go. And so even way before the show and all that, which just kind of gave us a bigger platform and a national platform to do this. And also an opportunity to write our first book, which was our story. And then we've done a couple of follow-up books since. And all of those opportunities were there because of what a God, well, God had done for us initially. And the interesting thing is that we've never, like, so we do things like it a bigger way now. And not as much, we don't have the time to do like we did it sit with a couple all the time and do premarital. And all the things we really love doing for many years. But I still, I still like gain so much from being need and need with a couple or somebody going through a struggle. And so within the last, what I'd say, a month, babe, we've had a young couple here locally that we had been instrumental in helping her parents, help redeem and renew their marriage. And now that actually even lead a big marriage ministry here, who were having some trouble and wanted us to talk to them. And of course, so it's like second generation, I was like, man, what a blessing. What an honor to get to spend a couple hours with this young couple and help them kind of get back on the right path. And then just yesterday we got a text from another couple here local that Lisa had really helped her. And then we had helped them get through some hard times. And now his mom and stepdad were having these major problems and had come to them because they were the health this marriage and their family. And then first person he reached out to was us. And so, and that was second generation going the other direction. And so you still have that opportunity. So about the movie, I mean, the thing that sites me the most is that I see the potential when your story is up on a big screen. And it's kind of ironic for me because whenever you guys approached a mom and dad about it in the blind, a dad was not, he's very hesitant at first. And which is understandable. Because he's definitely the villain in the story. And so he was like, oh, it's the worst thing in your life on a movie screen. I said, dad, I get it. I said, but just think about this dad. And I've now thought about these words that I gave to him. I've thought about it for us. I said, how many people in the history of the world planted earth? Because I haven't been making movies but 100 and plus years. Have had a movie made about their life. Wow. That's so true. I said, you know, it's not very many compared to billions that I believe. I said, do you either have to do something really good or really bad? To have a movie made about your life. And so it all happened to kind of do both. Exactly. Exactly right. And so he's. And we have to. And really most people have to try. Exactly. And so because most people are just like everybody else and they have their struggles. And so those words resonated back to me. I just thought, well, if this happens, and I realized we're just talking about it. But if it happens, then it would be an honor to get to have something where another artistic way of touching people. I mean, we have a book, obviously, we speak. This will be another great way to do it. I mean, I was so proud of the work you guys did on the blind just because it's so captured. I mean, I lived it. So I was there. And yet it captured that. And I thought I told the actors that play mom. I mean, the fact there were brits and they were sounded like southerners was impressive. That was. And but you know, so she's talking to them in her British accent, you know. And I said, you know, you just you captured mom's optimism. So well. Yeah. And then you captured the moment where she lost it. And I said that, you know, because I was there. I lived the whole thing. I said, and I've never, you know, that's what resonated with me the most in the film. Even though I thought the guy that played dad was tremendous. But the actress that played mom, she was so optimistic throughout the entire film. And then she until she wasn't until she lost it. And so I was just complimenting her. So that was you captured it. You did it. And so it was another way to touch people. And I think that's what I'm excited about. This opportunity is this another way to visually then tell the story that we've been telling. And just another way and raise the platform. Yeah. So there's so much about what you just said that I wanted to touch on. Well, I guess the ending, the talking about how, through art, you can touch people. I think that's the thing that as a family, we saw, you know, we had been about, like, we were children's minister, youth ministers, like, we were wanting to spread the gospel in all kinds of ways. But we had never dreamed that the TV show would be something how it would impact people in that way. And I think that that for me was so impactful of just realizing like the power of entertainment and storytelling. The Robinson family are great storytellers. And so it just felt like, okay, got to play something in our family's life to say like, oh, here's another way you can lead people to me that we would have never even thought of or realized. And since that, and I think that another thing that I was thinking of as you're talking is the thing that I noticed about before, you know, I came into the Robinson family at 17 years old. I was just turned 18, whatever we got married. And just seeing the openness to the not perfection of we're not, we didn't have it all right. So they're filling K story. They always were willing to tell their story to use the hard parts of their story to help others through it. And I've seen that in y'all as well. And I think that whenever we did start talking about doing the movie, I actually was kind of surprised that Phil was at all hesitant because they've told it so much. They've written books about it. They've done second videos. They talk about it a lot. And so at first, I was surprised that they were at all resistant. But then you realize like, oh, it's a whole different thing seeing that on a screen. And I remember watching it for the first time with them. And I mean, it broke my heart to watch those scenes with them and just what they might be feeling and all that. So I feel that same thing for you guys. It's like, I know it's, yeah. Watching them go through it, it's not easy to put your life out there on a screen. I think it would be harder. I think it's going to be really hard on our girls. Because they were young. They were 10 and 12, something like that. And their whole life since then has been so different. And so I think it'll be kind of hard on them to see how their mom was. Not that they don't remember, but whenever you've had bad times and then you have good times, the good times seem to overtake those bad. And so it'll be interesting to watch them. Yeah. Well, I was just saying this. See it. Somebody recently, Lisa has a bite that she does at the end of one of our presentations when we talk about marriage. Or maybe it's another one of our talks. But she talks about the way that people view her. And she says, she talks about in God's eyes, I'm this, in my husband's eyes, I'm this, in my daughter's eyes, I'm this. And it's a really powerful thing that she wrote out. And then the last one was in my grandchildren's eyes is this. And so every time she does it, of course, she gets scared up. I get scared up. I'm trying not to today. I'm taking a big risk here. I'm saying, wow. And I get for a clamp here. But it's so beautiful. And it hit me when she does that, that my grandchildren only know a completely healed woman. All they've ever known. My daughters can't remember everything, but they remember some of it. It's kind of like with me with mom and dad. I have memories, but I have far more memories of the better. But with grandkids, they only know this strong woman. So whenever they see her, they see a person they want to strive to be like. And they just, they hold her in high, high esteem. And even Carly talked about that when she got married and didn't have them as like hours. And it was just very humbling. And so I think about that that sometimes over time, that's what people see. But you're right. We've been willing to share that we had to go through a process to them. So I still feel like the reason that we're very approachable from people and by people is because they know they're not going to be judged by us because not only have we been in many situations like them, but we've been willing to talk about it. And we will decide that, look, God can bring healing and redemption and forgiveness through all these different things. And so that's the part I'm excited about that. And it will be hard. I mean, because even when we talk about it, we're upcoming now. We've got three straight marriage weekends in Rome. By the time we get to the third one, we're looking at each other and now it's like, woo, you know, because you tell the story. Because we tell it every time, like, you know, we really tell it like it is. And we're less like having to remind each other, OK? How are you feeling about this? Well, I'm a little bit wiped out, but you know what? All through that process, you'll be dealing with people that are just like in that early two months of coming back from an affair. And you never forget what that was like to live through that, or to be like Lisa and to just be shattered and make you've lost your whole family. And that's where she was. She felt so isolated and alone. And so people feel that way. And this little couple from yesterday is like, you know, his mom is like feeling that right now. So she's on her way back home to now face the consequences. And we remember what that was like, you know, and have to face the church. And we all work the church. And so, you know, those are heavy, heavy things, but you have to have community to do that. And I love what you said about the family with telling our stories, because I love to tell people, they say, what do you think was the secret of success about the show? And they'll have their ideas. And I know what it is. The secret to the success of Doug Diades, he was, these were all our stories from, not just from what was happening day to day, Doug Commander and, you know, whatever year we filmed. But these were all our stories from kids. And you're a really story camp. All those stories came through, and they were just told in different ways among, you know, our family. It may be two different people that you're watching, but when we were kids, it may have been to somebody else's. But they were authentic and they were real. And like any show, you know, some of them wouldn't be funny if storylines. But I always thought that 75 or 80% of the stories we did on the show were stuff that actually happened to everybody. And they were all of our stories. And the retelling of them and the way it was done and it was funny, but at the same time it was touching, I think is what really resonated with people. I mean, they just realized every family has stories. Some people don't want to tell their stories. And I always say, look, you're denying the pictures of God if you don't tell your stories. Right. Yeah. You talk about your kids and grandkids. They remember the good, because of the so, it's complete healing. And that can be found in God. And y'all have done that. And so that's what they see when they see you. But one thing in watching, and I think that's another part of storytelling and film and book at a good book or whatever, whenever, you know, whenever I'm watching a film in case story or our daughter, our kids are watching their story. It's like they understand even the bad, you know, and that's part of it too. You're just like, oh, and you have compassion. They just felt that compassion for K, what she's going to do. Compassion for a feel for the things that caused his alcoholism or the things that in his early life that led him to that, you know, you feel that for people. And I think that's one thing about, it's like, we all relate on some way. We've all been in that place in marriage where we're like, all right, we need to go to the emergency room because something like this is, we have to figure out how to work through this. We've all been there as a teenager and not, you know, not necessarily the place of abortion, but of like, I've screwed up, you know, I've done something that I didn't think would have done. Or we've all been in those places. And I think that when people, you do put your life story out there and that's what we've, I think we found everyone ever again. It's not that people are like, oh, look at them. It's people are like, oh, yeah, I've been there too and I understand and I feel a wholeness with you because you're willing to tell the truth. And I thought about it. Or even like, you know, when dad crossed over on that Sunday right before Memorial Day, when we all got there, by the time we all got in that room together, because it took us a few minutes for everybody in town to get there. And, you know, as we were all packed in there, and I mean, he's still laying there in the bed. He's made the crossover. It's just his body, the spirit is, you know, owned to what's next and a great resurrection and mom's there. And there were a cup of tear shed, of course, but it wasn't, but then we just started telling stories. Yeah. You know, remember, I mean, we just, and we started laughing and we would cry a little bit and we would laugh a little bit. But I just thought even in a moment like that where our patriarch is crossing over, it was still a moment like we could have shared some story like that on our show. Yeah. Because it was still us, it was authentic. I mean, you know, and so even in moments like that where a lot of times if you don't have hope, if you don't have something bigger, if you don't have healing in a family, then those moments can be just torturous and treacherous. And so, you know, agonizing and sad, instead for us, it was not any of that. I mean, it was like, yeah, this is what we all live for, you know, this is what we're all doing. Yeah. Well, because so many times families don't say on earth what they wanted to, to their loved ones, or they don't approach things with their families. Unresolved is right. That they really wanted to. But I can truthfully say our whole family had loved don't feel and told him we loved him. And we had no unresolved issues. And it was all just, we were happy for him to be able to cross over, you know. And I think that's part of the problem. I think it's whenever you are in a family and you don't have that. And, you know, a lot of times it has to do with a sexual abuse or something like that. Yeah. I suffered that as a child too, but I've even, you know, come to terms with that and forgiven the person that did that to me. But that's part of it, I think. I think you've got to get to the point where you see what Christ has forgiven you for. And you look at other people and you step in their shoes and you say, you know what? I can forgive them too. Yeah. And that's where K was, you know, even with Phil. She had no unresolved. I mean, you know, she's just holding its hand. And, you know, as he passes to the other side and it's just, it was a beautiful thing, you know. It's the way it should be. And it looked for me, you know, I mean, I turned 60 this year. So it hit me in the moment. I thought, I thought, I've said this to sign mom. I was like, now, I don't know which one of y'all are actually at the plate, but the other one's own deck. And I'm in the hole. Like I'm standing at the top of the dugout. So I'm realizing now how the batting order is working here. And if it were so as opposed to, I'm not very far from getting to the plate. And so, and they laughed, you know, I was like, hey, I've struck out, you know. And, but at the same time, it's the natural. It's what we do. Yeah. And so you want to make an impact in this life. And so we don't like, I'm sure there could be a lot of movies made about a lot of amazing stories that won't get made. But to have that opportunity for us, if it does happen is something we'll cherish. You know, because it allows that to then speak even beyond us. And that's what I told Dad. I said, Dad, you realize there'll be people watch this movie that would have heard of you that followed you, that never meet you in this life. And yet, you'll impact them because of that, because of putting yourself out there to a level that they will find you in heaven. Yeah. They will find you in the next life. There is no doubt that that has happened. And it has happened. Because we have met several. We had one of our marriage refresh last year that did their testimony. And he literally had a complete transformation in the theater. I mean, he could not speak going home to his life. And when he finally did, he was ready to change his life and has. And so stories like that, I mean, just, and I know there's so many, you know, that they're going to be, I said, so Dad, they're going to find you. They're going to find you there, you know. So there's a policeman there I got to find and thank him, you know, for turning me around. So, I mean, that's what's going to happen. Any eternity we're going to make those connections. Yeah. And I'm not worried about people seeing, I mean, I'm not excited about people seeing the difficulties and the struggles that I've had. But what I'm very excited about is to see what God can do whenever you have those struggles. Right. And whenever you lay your life down for him and say, okay, remake me. You know, make me in the image that you want me to be. And that's what I'm excited for people to see is what God truly can do, you know, even, even with the worst of us. Yeah. But when you face your worst moments in the moment, when God can bring you through those, then you're ready to face those again, even in a movie screen, 25 years later. And I don't think I told this story the last time we were on a city, but just a few weeks after we'd gotten back together and we're still very raw and very just, you know, we're healing. And everything is very, you know, we're like a, we're like a little horse that just got born and he's wobbly, you know, and you're not wanting to like push him to our, and we were about to pull in at Walmart down here. And Lisa looks at me and she has a real panic look on her face and I was like, what is it? And she said, let's just go home. We don't need to go to Walmart. And I was like, what is it? Because you know, now we're building honesty and trust. It was like, what is it? You know, because I could tell she was upset. Yeah. And she said, he's turning in. He and I know who she met, the person that she had had their fairway. And so I started to pull out to for us to leave. And then I just, you know, I just will give Holy Spirit credit. I just said, no, we're not doing that. You know, we are not, this is our town. We live here. You chose me. I said, are you still choosing me? And she said, well, of course, I'm choosing you. And I said, then we're not going to do it. We're not going to run from any situation like this. And so I got right back in that lane and we pulled into Walmart. We didn't see him. So we go into the store and when you know it and about 10 minutes, we come around with corner to corner and it's buggy to buggy. Wow. I mean, it's like, well, you know, and he's there with a woman. We're here and we look at each other and they turned the buggy and went the other way. And you know, it was very hard for Lisa. It wasn't, what an easy for me that day, your stomachs and knots. But when we left there that day, I felt like that was a victory statement that we're going to overcome this. You know, and we don't have to run anymore from any of that. And ironically, that's 25 years ago and we've never seen him since. But in the moment, I feel like that was a test for us. You know, and so I say all that to say, you know, we think about watching a movie, you know, where your wife is going to have an affair with someone. However, we portrayed that. You guys portrayed that. You know, you will have to live that by seeing it. But at the same time, once you dealt with it, had a home. And you've been doing that for 25 years. It's not the most frightening thing imaginable to me. Because they all might already has that. Yeah. This helps the person that's sitting there that has had an affair that hasn't been able to tell their spouse or maybe one day they'll be faced with that. And hopefully you're trying to avert that from ever happening. So that's what you do about telling yourself. Because you're seeing the victory. Exactly. And I remember, I remember y'all talking about having a vision for yourself as grandparents. You know, with your grandkids. No, I'm a grandmaw. So I'm here every day. You know, having a grandmaw against, I'm an extra emotional. But having a vision for yourselves. And even in those early days of trying to come back together. And there was a point. And I don't know how did you get to that point to where you could see yourself there after you were at your lowest point. Like, I think, I guess, wrapped up in that is forgiveness for yourself and forgiveness for one another. And then also, but how did you keep that vision and get here today? I mean, it really took me a long time. Because of course, whenever you're trying to change your life, then the evil one is coming in and reminding you of what you've done. You know, you're saying you should be. You really know who you really are. You know, people really know what you've done. And so that took me a long time. But the more that I grew in God and read God's Word, and I read Psalms and Proverbs all the time. And I read for weeks, I read David's account in Psalm 51. And just to know that God called him a man after his heart. And I thought, wow, I didn't murder anybody. You know, I wasn't even as bad as he was. But it really helped to go in and read his words, you know, and to continually ask God to create in me a clean heart. I've never had a clean heart. I want a clean heart. I mean, just to daily feast on that. But I would say it probably, you know, it probably took me at least a year to feel confident in the woman that I was. And you know, the first time we shared it, I was scared to death because I thought, you know, there might be new people in here. They've never heard this. And, you know, then they're not going to like me. They're going to have fought with me. But again, that was the evil one, you know, coming in and whispering those little lies. And it's really funny. So we did that. We spoke in our church. And I guess it's been five years. And afterwards, one of the guys from CR came and said, I've been holding a grudge against you five years. How long were you doing that, Tile? I just want to let you know that I forgave you. And I mean, that was pretty amazing. Yeah. You know, but I thought, I wouldn't even have known that. You know, I knew the guy and I'd been around him, but I had no idea. Well, I any ask you for forgiveness for him, not for you and you, you know, which was, and all of a sudden it was back on Lacey and she was like, well, I didn't know that I had hurt you that badly, but I am so sorry. And yes, I accept your forgiveness for you, except my, you know, so it was a beautiful moment. It was. It really was. But at that point, I thought, you know, God's done an amazing thing. And I cannot continue to allow the evil one to try to hold my tongue. You know, let's don't talk about this. You know, after we did our book, oh my goodness, that was rough because, you know, my whole family read the book and a lot of it, they didn't know. And because she was honest about a lot of stuff from her childhood that led to a lot of her mindset. And that obviously then outed some people, you know, without naming people, but in my, you know, in my family. And I got multiple emails, you know, from cousins. But then, similar faith. But then, you know, my mom's reaction, you know, was just, was guilt. And my mom was like, well, this just makes me look bad. You know, for you to put this in print, this just makes me look bad. And I said, mom, I don't know how you get that because throughout the book, I have said, this was not your fault. Yeah. And I don't blame you. And she said, well, I mean, you might say that, but everybody else is going to, you know, feel like, you know, I was a terrible person. She's now dealing with that same same thing, Lisa went through, that she's dealing with it herself. But I also learned that she had so much of that same background, things that had happened to me. She didn't have a doubt about it. And she had never dealt with it. Wow. So it brought it all back up for her. Yeah. And then she felt it for me. So it was, I mean, you know, it was tough. But of course, if you, if I could bowl it down into two things, which is one of things to do when we present about marriage, the way we saw past and actually could get a glimpse of that grandparent thing you're talking about, which by the way, the last slide we show is our whole family. Yeah. And every time we do it, Lisa's at the end and she can never not cry. Because there's that picture of all those grandkids standing in front of our house and it's like this was the picture that we didn't know was going to happen. But it happened. But it was two things. One is she mentioned it. For her, for Lisa, it was honesty and openness. They had to be there. It's what had been missing in our life. It had been missing in our marriage. So she had to, that had to be her new nor star. That was, had to be open, had to be honest. That's good. And you had to trust that even though it was bad, we were still going to be open and it was, and for me, because I wasn't always a good receiver of openness and honesty. I was helping push her into darkness because I didn't realize it. But I was overreacting every time instead of just trying to find a way for to deal with it. So my two things I had to live and I have to this day since is forgiveness and grace. I mean, if that's the way guys are going to deal with us, that was the way I was going to have to deal with her and me and us. And so when those two things synced up and became the two power points of our life going forward, then it's changed everything. And it allowed us to see past even the mistakes and shortfalls and everything that happened from that point forward. And so that became the key. And so when we talked to couples, and that's just our experience, it could be different things for different people. But if if infidelity, especially as ever been a part of those are the two things I have to, you know, be part of your bed right going forward. And look, it takes a commitment to that because in those early years, you want to use what's happened as a way to then create, you know, new pathways and something to do better. But all that does is continue to live in the past. You can't move forward unless you're willing to say, I don't want to use anything you've done or I've done to hurt us going forward. That's what God's forgiveness does. So I said, he'll remember us and there's no more. It's not that he's like a terrible, like absent-minded God and can't remember stuff. He's God. He knows everything. But he's what he's saying is, I'm not going to keep bringing it up. I'm not going to use it. I'm going to choose to let you heal. And so that's kind of in the key for us. And that's what we try to get across to other people. And if you can live that life of everyday openness and honesty and grace and forgiveness, then when you'll be able to handle anything, because if you can live it little, you can live it big. And so that's kind of our thrust in what we tried to. That's so powerful. That's so good. And I feel like I remember when we talk a lot about the honesty episode, we're feeling K. Rene Nuthar Vals. And I remember that's right. That's right. When Lacey and I came on the show. That's right. Well, it's my favorite episode because of course it was your debut. But because it was that picture of these two people who chose that. Yes, that's right. And always say like it's repentance and forgiveness. They both had to choose it to come together to create what we were experiencing in that moment. Had they not, we would not write either. And then their test came a few years later when they get a letter that this person says she's dad's daughter. And I've told this story before that mom's reaction was Phil, you know, I've always wanted a daughter other than Jeb. No, that's not true. I made that up. You added that part. Yeah. I've always wanted a daughter. And now it's taken me 44 years to get one. Well, a person only says that if they really meant they forgave him 44 years. And so that was the, I looked at that and I was, I thought, wow, you go mom. I mean, like she showed she meant it when she was, even make a statement like that. And so it's just, it to live that is so important. And you're right. I tell people about that episode because I talk about it being our debut. And I always say, if will it have me off in the beginning? There's no telling where the show could have gone because that was a highest rated episode in the history of cable television. That's right. Because of my debut. And sure. And but I said, if you look at people's faces when they were doing close-ups of people during the little ceremony we did, and it was very small. I mean, it took us a while to film it, but it was just a few minutes. There were tears in everybody's eyes. Yeah. Because that was a moment for all of us. We all realized as we were sitting there with our spouses and, you know, our families that our patriarch and matriarch paid the way through forgiveness and love. And that's why we were all sitting there. And so it touched us all deeply, you know, to be in that moment. And so again, that's the, to me, the success of the show was the real stories of who we were. And even our moments like that, we were going to say it hadn't always been easy. And mom even says that in her vows. You know, it's been easy, you know. And honest, I think. I think that's good. Honest, look at our lives. In today's world, there's not a lot of honest look into other people's lives. You know, a lot of people don't think there's, you know, what is the truth? You know, there's no absolute truth. And we feel as though, yes, there is absolute truth. We know there's absolute truth. But it's not taught, you know, in today's society. It's like whatever your truth is, then that's what truth is. And you know, you have to have those hard conversations, even with your children and grandchildren. No, there is an absolute truth. And if you pick up your Bible, you will find that absolute truth. And you know, there's no, what you think and what we think, it's what the Bible says. And we might have different ideas on what that scripture's talking about, our different ways we use that. But at the same time, there isn't absolute truth. And it's God and it's His Word. That's right. A better way. Well, and you brought up early or going to God's Word and finding like assurance in that, I got to love you even in your worst and in your brokenness. And I think that's the thing. I think people sometimes are scared to go to God's Word because they're like, oh, it's going to be going to be like hit over the head with it. But instead, if you open up His Word and you actually really like pay attention to the stories and the people that God used, every one of them are messed up and broken and flawed and all that. And it's such a story. If you really pay attention, you're like, oh, no, God uses people like me or people that I could look out and be like, well, that was way worse than anything I've ever done. And so I think that that is one thing that people can maybe are scared of with God's Word because they have been kind of beat over the head with it sometimes instead of saying, oh, no, this is a love story from God to you and to these people that are His people that He's brought. Each and the same and the same and the same and the same and the same and the same. All the same. All the same. All the same. All the same. All the same. All the same. are flawed and all the bad guys are still people too. Yeah. And there's still people that God loves and wants to save. And so, you know, we kind of, it's hard to tell some of the signs you read some of those old testament stories who are the good guys and who are the bad guys. Just know that they're all flawed and the bad guys are still people too. Right. And may they may have got it wrong, maybe following a false God, but God has always wants to teach them the right way. And so it's, you know, talking about Rayhab and some of the stories of the Old Testament. But that's powerful when you think about it that all of us are flawed. Yeah. And there was only one that wasn't and it was our savior. Yeah. And yet he said he loves, he's so unashamed of us, he calls us his family. Well, which is very special. Yeah. That's beautiful. All right. Well, this was awesome. Well, it's talking to y'all. Is there anything I didn't ask you that you want to talk about or want to say? Not really. No. I don't think so. I mean, I will say this, we were so, you know, we talk a lot about our, we made sure our picture, our mom and dad and before we started rolling the cameras, we would tell my year grandmother, who's my next-door neighbor right across the street? Your parents are my next-door neighbor on the other side and your daughter's right behind me. And in this compound. And so, and so, and this compound living that we do. But I just, I'm so proud to see, I love the new show. I love the idea of the revival because it means that we live forward. Yeah. And to now, every time I go through the tour and at the end of the tour, there's a big picture of 2014. We were all filming the show. And it's just a snapshot of one time. And so, your kids are teenagers in the picture. And I've got two young granddaughters at the time who now one married and your kids are married. And I just look at the population that that group has now become and just really 10 or 11 short years. And I realize that's the beauty of getting to be here together and do what we do. And you guys are getting to do it again, which is fantastic. And we're, we love getting to watch it again along with the rest of America just to see what happens as you live that legacy out. And to see you guys as grandparents like us. And we're really all, somebody said, we're the patriarch of your family. And I said, well, not really. I mean, I'm the oldest brother, but we're all patriarchs in our own family. That's the beauty. And I'm so proud of my brothers and my sister for being the matriarch of her clan because that's what we do. I mean, we are good not in faith. And so we're on encouraging our kids to stay married. And like Lisa said, to believe who God is and to raise up our grandchildren and then their children. And so to get to experience that together and to get to do it by even living in the same zip code and what we do. And still stay so busy is a joy. And I cherish every moment that I get with your kids and your grandkids. And it's just a beautiful thing. It's funny because somebody will say, hey, Sadie was here or Willie was here. Oh, Jace was over here. And we're like, oh really? And they're like, we don't even know where they're going. And we're like, no, no. Well, people are so close. So they're like, you know, just kind of like all live on top of each other. What's that like? And we're like, you know, you still really have to be intentional about seeing one another. Because our lives are busy. Yeah. Even though we're at the podcast studio on the same. I'll see the light on. I know Sadie's here. Yeah. But you still, yeah, do you need that intentional ketchup time because we do have all have busy lives and big growing families. And as you were saying that about the legacy, I would listen to the podcast of the day. And he said, how much you care he asked the host? He was like, how much you care about if four generations from now know your name? And the host was like, well, I don't have any kids and I'll die. I don't really care. He was like, no, you need to care. And just thinking about it brought me back to the Bible and how that generational and the legacy. And he was like, what you do matters for the next generation? And the next generation and the next generation. And like the more we as a society living for today, living for ourselves, you know, and you don't care about that next generation, that affects everybody, you know. What you do is fix the next. I've got a picture of a guy that looks just like Dad and it's his great grandfather, Judge Jephthor Robertson, who Jep's named after. And my granny told me two stories about him. I know he was a judge and I know he got shot on a levy by a federal officer over some cows. That's all I know about Judge Jephthor Robertson. And so, and that's my great, great grandfather. But I thought, how sad that I don't know anything else about that man's life. Other than he looks just like Dad in the 1850s. And yet I said, look at what, how many of you were going to know about my dad because he's out there preaching and there's a movie about him and there's all this stuff. We should want to know about our ancestry as well. We should care. We should care about that next generation and the next. Yeah. Well, this was great. Love visiting with y'all. You know, the raw grandparents. And that's the best. Welcome to the old foe, you know. Whoa. That's great. That's right. All right. Hope y'all have a great week. Thanks for being with us.