Fixing Jacob with Colum Tyrrell

And now, The Bonfire with Big J. O'Crossen and Robert Kelly. Hey. I didn't take a night off of that. I went into the spot and talked about it. We were talking about having a baby, how hard and crazy it is now. Back in the day, he just had sex and then she got pregnant. Now we know so much about pregnancy that Dawn by the end had an app. She was drinking certain cough syrup, to fucking dream catcher over a pussy, some chicken bones. By the end, I had to hold her legs up. But you have to fuck too though also. Oh, there you go. And then fuck also. Okay. I was putting it in by my hand. You're just doing those things. I was mushing in like a sand castle. Chichiya. Christine came in hot. They closed in the lobby again. Oh, they did? For who now? I have no idea. Well, they have a party out there. There's like a birthday party or some event. I just wanted to get down. Jacob, do you have clearance to find out what's going on out there? I'm actually not clear to go into the lobby. We were here. Yeah, nobody's cleared. Yeah, you gotta go around. But you can't find out what's going on? I could find out. So how would Stern would have to go around? No. No, he wouldn't be here. You think T.I. would have to go around? No? I think T.I. would probably. If the guy didn't know who he was. Why do we have to go around? I'm gonna tell you why I'm walking through this lobby. Why? I'm gonna tell you why. All right? I'm gonna tell you. I'm staying right here. You want to know? You want to know what's going on? I'm not telling you. Better find out the hard way. You listening? I love that. Jacob, don't take shit from anybody. I love that Jacob does everything just begrudgingly. Yeah, but he's not. Everything he does, he has his shoulders down. Okay. I know, but I'm like, Jacob, go there and sucker fish the fish bowl. Fuck him through the blowfish. Jacob hates getting up. We have to reinvent this guy. Jacob, that porn star, Addis Fouchet is saying, oh my God, when did you get here? For a person that was here the entire time she was there. Directly next door. He's sitting right next to her. In a thick brown jacket. Laughing at the stuff we're all saying, even she's saying. Like, maybe audible sounds. She jumped like a fucking ghost. Like a shadow came to life. She goes, what happened? She goes, whoa, how long have you been there? Jesus. How long have you been there? It's like, I've only seen this ass on the internet. And I was like, ew, what? Is this to teach guys to be able to date long term so they don't get... I don't know if you've been sitting there. Jesus. I mean, that's horrible. Hey guys, we're live. Yeah. Now we're, and he's going to lift force. That's why we sent him out there to get killed by black people in the fish bowl. Yeah. Well, first of all, he has to change his fucking earth tone outfits. He just blends into walls and chairs. I just said, he's coming in. That's his whole thing. We got to reinvent him, dude. JB is going to be somebody else. JB is going to peacock. Don't take no shit. He's going to get, he's going to get like a hoodie thing going. Like a hoodie. Like you got the hoodie thing. A hoodie. A hoodie thing. He needs more than that. He needs... Oh, he needs more than that. We get a hoodie. Maybe some type, we change his glasses up. He's got those stupid fucking reading glasses. He's got to get like big glasses like me. I said he's got to start embracing. He's in shape all over. No, you have your look. Let's keep you in your lane. Listen, I don't want... He's going to be an old fucking Jew like that. He'll praise you. What? Yeah, he's going to fucking... Yeah. They're going to stop him on 47th Street? Yeah. Someone's widow to aunt. Jacob's got to play into... He's got to play a character until he believes in himself where I'm thinking like some distress jeans buttoned down flannily shirt with the tank top showing underneath it. He's in shape. Maybe flip flops? Flip flops with some ripped jeans. He absolutely do flip flops where he's like he doesn't give a fuck that much. Ripped jeans or flip flops. Or shoes that have like, you know, he doesn't wear socks with some slip-ons. But he looks cool. Oh, yeah. He's pulling it off. Get the ankles around. What, you mean like a crock, like a Birkenstock type thing? Yeah. No, no, no, that's too... That's looking for danger. No, he was just saying like I don't give a fuck if flip flops... You know those boots with the really high heels but they're like work boots but it has a high heel? A lot of people wear them. Why don't we get him a boot with a high heel so it gives him the height? No, because he's gonna be fucking Prince. Yes, so what? What are we trying to do? Are we trying to peacock him? Are we trying to... If he peacocks tiny, it'll appear big. We come up with five new looks and we get him to try out each one. Okay, that's not a good idea. I like that. Why don't we do it? Like he goes out and gets changed and then comes back and says, it's not what you wanted to do. No, not that one. It's just like Marilyn Manson's sister. Like a fucking 16 year old girl. Not fucking Big J's high heel boots that he would wear. Like a dominatrix he comes in. Christine just ordered those for Big J. I think we should do that. I think this should be... Maybe we just get it on it now when he comes back and starts figuring out... I think Collom's right. Let's pick five outfits. Let's order those outfits for him. One of them we have to pick out is hip hop style. Yeah. That should be a furry hoodie. With fur on it. Black, maybe leather. Maybe. And bottom pants and maybe some... I was going to throw him in a straight angle. I like the flat caps that you guys are wearing. Like that but a little bit off. One of these? Yeah, but more like loose because that's kind of more like... A little off to the side. Yeah, a little off to the side, a nice chain. Maybe that. Maybe a cangle. What about backwards cangle? It might look forced. You might look like a young boss. Yeah, a goatee. Has that ever existed in our lifetime of young boss? I don't know. I've heard legends. He's like the pyramids. Oh, wait a minute. What's that one right there with the long sweater? The Long Island sweater? Okay, well here's... I don't mind that. Let's coffee shop Jacob. It's not going to make it. That's not going to make it. No, this looks like what? Cool Jew? What does that one look like? We're picking five different... I know, but I was thinking more like, you know, construction worker, Indian cop. Yeah, I'm going to go... With the village people. All the village people jobs. Yeah. Kentucky linemen. I think we pick five genres and let them try each genre on. Yeah. And I think that that little coffee shop fucking writer, poet guy. What's wrong, Jay? He's too strong. You wrote the fucking equipment here. Sucks nuts. Yeah, but it sucks nuts for nine years. This is series XM. I mean, everything's just fucking tough if you just tap anything, it falls. Yeah, but the other suit is pretty good though. Now you don't think he'd look good in that? No. It looks like a sweater I would buy. What if he can't go goth vampire, he's too timid. I think he could do like... But we're trying to get him out of it. But he could do like a Key Westy, like, his pirate head. Oh, totally. Like a... A waist and a way in the room. Yeah, Hawaiian shirt and a... He could go beach club. Oh, yeah, he could go like a Sammy Hagar. Like a swinger. Like a total fucking, yes, a little bit like a swinger for sure. Crispy tan though. We might have to spray tan him. Kind of like a Hunter S. Thompson style. I almost bought that sweater, by the way, Christine. We might have to... Oh, there we go. That one right there, I almost bought that. This outfit? Yeah, Don said no. You almost bought that. No, not that. I have that outfit. Not that one. The sweater. What do you just buy the first thing that pops up? Is that one in your shop? The panther. Yeah, I almost bought that. You did not. I swear to God. How does this even appear on your shop? I swear to God. The first thing you do. Remember the sweater that I had at Ari, the thing that we went to? I have that red one. No, you don't. Yes, I do. You have four tigers on a button-down shirt? I'll wear it Monday. From Oxnit? Yeah, Oxnit. I got... Big Oxnit guy? Remember the one with the tigers on it that I wore at the Ari thing? I do. Yeah. Everyone remembers it. Right? Yeah. You have one remember the stitch there. Scroll down, scroll down. You guys remember, right? I have all these. They go up to 4XL, which is very nice. High reviews. Jacob, what was going on out there? All right. There's nobody coming in. It's a Harry Styles album release party. Is he going to be here? No. They're just doing it together. They're just playing the album. We can't walk through because of that? Yeah. Okay, that's crazy. No, the reasoning, I guess, they said is because they don't want any phones because the album isn't released. They don't want somebody pretentially recording. We fucking work here. We work here. Hey, man, they're also, they said they're going for a vibe. I don't know what the vibe is. Oh, that's going to hurt. No, no, that's not us. It's just... What the fuck is the vibe? That was at you. I don't know what the vibe is. That was shady at you. Well, that's good. I'm glad that comes up, Jacob, because we decided. Part of the JB transition. I don't like that vibe. We're going to figure out, well, you might when we're done with you. Yeah, then I'm going to be begging you to join them. We're going to pick out five genres of outfit, five different looks. Oh, is this fruity clothes for me? No, not fruity. Not with that attitude. No, no, no. This is good. This is style. This is drip. We're going to pick out five genres. This is a dentity. But Jacob, tell us if you like it or not. Okay. We're going hip hop. We'll go hip hop. We got a fun. Country western. Country western. All right. Let me see it. But rugged the way that I want you to be. There's going to be no dandy, no bow ties, no suspenders, no. You're not going to be a plantation owner. You're going to be a fucking heavy guy. I said I might have you having. I'm thinking yellow leather working gloves in your hand. Gloves you would need to like so that you don't get burns from horses. It's funny you bring up plantation owner. You know the black louge is brown. It is funny to bring that up. That's his name. Don Johnson in Django Unchained. I mean complete races, but I love the outfit. It is. The Colonel Sanders. Colonel Sanders. You want to. You want to. You were questing a Colonel Sanders. Is that what you're asking for? I think it's bad. You really want to wear ribbon tie. I think this is Christine's pick for you because she's brought up. I agree. I agree. I agree. This might be one that works for you. Versace model. That's the look we're going for. I like that. It's barabas. It's barabas. We have to get you a chain though. He needs a chain and that pinky ring would go fantastic with that. Maybe it's because of that. The pinky ring is going to happen with whatever he has. I think we just let him dress like this. Maybe because it's Don Johnson. I mean the man is just. He's always on the rocket to me. As a person who loves you, I'd prefer you not dress like this in the streets of New York City. But as soon as you put it on, the accent just starts. If I could lick my lips upon such a ponderine. I say I'll say, who told you how to read? Why is there a black man on a horse in my plantation? If it wasn't linked to bad stuff. Charlie Barnett could read, indubly. Do the bit about the Japanese and how they walk. Do the thing when they walk off on a crazy life. Mandinga, we get two comics to do hacky impressions of Puerto Ricans. I like this Charlie Barnett, but his lips ain't white enough and his inner lips ain't red enough. Do me a favor and say the N word again. Tell me how Mexicans act. Jacob, I'm not picking your underwear. Other than to say I'd like you to have something with dual pouch technology. You would hold your dick in balls. I prefer Key West party guy like Jimmy Buffett. Jimmy Buffett fan, power head. You're wearing the Hawaiian shirt. That's the way he dresses when he goes to Florida anyways. You know to bring it back, you might actually be like the Noogie Lamont. Whoa, Noogie Lamont. How he dressed in Miami Vice? Noogie Lamont. Jesus Christ. I don't want you dressed like Noogie Lamont. You can't say it in that accent. You don't know how he looks, Jay. Uh huh. He looks like Charlie Barnett. No, I know, but this is too dorky. I don't, Jacob's, the dork days are over. They're behind us. What about a French sailor? I don't think you guys are getting it. I'm thinking maybe like a tight, maybe a black t-shirt. We roll them sleeves up 90210 style. Okay. Maybe we make him look like a fucking like the ghost of a drag racer from the 50s. You know what I mean? Like one of those looks where we cuff the bottom of the jeans a little bit. Well, like the original Hell's Angel guys that just rode to ride. More like the Deuce is Wild. The Deuce is Wild. More like the outsiders. A tough. Yeah, a tough. You want me to look like a tough. A street tough. A greaser. You want to be like, uh, yeah. Yeah, we'll give him one so. You're like, well, you know, we, the pink ladies. We'll take your belt. We'll make you do it on the side. Yes. Yes. And maybe some, and maybe some cigarettes while up in your sleeve. And you flip a coin. But there'll be, uh, there'll be bubblegum cigarettes. I do like that. Just flipping a coin casually just. Always, always like really working a toothpick like in the front of your mouth a lot. I like Bobby. He's just a bubblegum cigarette thing. We'll give you a little watch too. And you're like a little pocket watch, little chain to your belt that you can take it out. And he's a scrooge. He loves a pocket watch. He loves a pocket watch. He loves a chain. A pocket watch doesn't go with everything. Now pinky rings go with everything. Pocket watch, we could have a look. Oh yeah, we could just, we have five looks. One of them could be steampunk. Yeah. We can go Jacob full steampunk. Yeah. Just fucking like metal hats and shit. Some goggles. He can't do steampunk. You know who always has a toothpick, adopted the toothpick lifestyle? Lars Ulrich. Always has a toothpick when he talks. Yeah. I don't like it. You don't like it. I don't like the tooth. I think we have to go. I think we have to go. It just means like you're picking food out of your teeth. What about orthophones arelli look? We dress them up. That's what I'm saying. Like the fawns. But that's sort of like the drag racer. We dress them exactly like the fawns. A cool old Jew. Yeah, they're not going to, it's two on the nose. Can I say something too? The fawns' leather jacket sucked. It had the elastics on the cuffs. It was brown. It was brown, it wasn't black. It was brown and it had the elastics around the waist and the fucking cuffs. You had boring ass pockets. He was a fucking dweeb. It was an ugly jacket then. Yeah, look at it. It stinks. What a shit jacket. Look how big the elastic is on the cuff. Ayy. Oh. I think Jacob has that jacket now. Probably. But I'll tell you, it was not going to have that jacket. JB. Look how he looks old wearing it though. It doesn't. Oh, God. Oh, it's black there. That's not. It was that. That's him. Yeah, that's Henry W. Looks like an AI version of him. I think it was always brown, right? I think they changed it. They changed it. That's not him though. That could be seen. That's him. That's just a promo picture. He didn't even wear that at the first season. I think it was a totally different jacket. He had a T-shirt. I think he had a, no, he had a barracuda. He was a different kind of jacket. Wasn't he like a different kind of shirt? The first season he didn't have a leather. What's a barracuda? Same type of look, but cloth. Oh, okay. Yeah. Got you. Right. You like the color of the shirt? Yeah. I like the color of the shirt. I like the color of the shirt. Got you. Right. You looking at a barracuda leather? A barracuda jacket. Not leather, just... Fonzy. Fonzy, barracuda jacket. Fonzy. There you go. Yeah, it didn't work. It didn't work. It didn't look cool. No. It did not look cool. Yeah, you could do like 1980s English skin head type of a thing. We could go with that. Yeah, you'd love that. I love that. And the white laces would really send a message to Black Lou. A little tattoo on your forehand of a cross. And that would go with all your books at your house. That would roll in with your anti-semitic books collection. That would give you an excuse for the boots. I only have one. It's the one, though. Yeah, 1980s British skin head look is a good look for Jacob for sure. Yeah, with the little red thin suspenders. The suspenders, yeah. Oh my God, dude. This is it. I'm gonna stomp somebody. I do like that. We're gonna call this your take the country back look. Yeah. Yeah, we're gonna call this all lives matter look. What's this? Wait a minute. Whoa. Whoa. This is out there, but I'm digging it. This is a see-through shirt that you're gonna be wearing with some dress pants. Yeah. But some nice fitted dress pants. But it has a built-in scarf. It's a scarf and shirt in one, so you don't have to go looking for all of your items. Yeah, it's a scarf. You got a nice scarf. Little Steven, did I say this on the air? Little Steven was in last week and he was wearing... From the East Street band? Yes. Bruce Springsteen. Light blue jeans, but the boots were part of the jeans. What? What? Like a fucking overall? Onze? Onze. He was wearing jeans onze? The boots were, he had to pull on the pants and the boots would go on. It was like pajama bob. He was like fucking wearing way there. I'm telling you. Bobby's trying to get a three-piece suit that does. Bobby wants all of his clothes like Leslie. Like a morph suit that just looks like it. It's called a Suzy and you jump in it and it just zips in the front. That's what he was wearing. I see him for women, but not... Oh, I get it. It's a style thing. It's probably, he's wearing women's clothes probably because it's... Look at men's. Type of the word men's in. I bet it doesn't exist. Is there a name for them? I didn't know they existed, but yeah, he stood out. Yeah, I bet he's wearing women's jeans. Pant issues. Yeah, they were boots. Pant issues. Pant issues. Men's pant issues. Oh, now I really want to buy. That's how we're just going to go on the LGBT Panta friends. Pant issues. Excuse me. I identify as a Panta. You think I wouldn't rock a pair of pant issues? I know you would. Now that I know they're cool. No, no, no, no. Pant issues. You put heelies in though. You're fucking in. The thing where they weren't tight, they were tight. They were tight. They didn't... Yeah, because they were women's pants. They were tight. They were tight. Yeah, because they were women's pants. Pant issues. Pant issues. Sorry, thank you. Pant issues. He was... he was in his 70s and they were kind of form fitting. Did you see his nuts? Those old guy nuts. Those flat old nuts. Those old nuts. That's one of the best, dude. Wysons. That's my favorite type of nuts. Those are wild. Pant issues. His didn't bat. There was a high heel. With a high heel? They weren't baggy. They were like form fitting, I mean, boot up to his toe. They were tailor made pant issues. That's how you know you've made it. That is how you know you've made it, dude. I want all of my clothes to be one piece. Bobby's going to get that Suitsy though, I believe in you. I want that Suitsy. He said Bobby would go to a funeral wearing a suit that... He said he wants all of his clothes designed by Leslie Nielsen and the naked gun. He goes, well, you don't realize underneath my sweatsuit is a full tuxedo and underneath that, a woman's dress just in case I have to be a... Yeah, it's a suit. You don't have to tuck a shirt in or a belt. Sure. It's just you jump in it and you zip it up and the tie goes over the zipper. Nothing beats a Jet 2 holiday. Right now, we've got some great deals available. Plus, you'll get the best choice of rooms and hotels. Book now with just a £60 deposit per person. Enjoy flexible monthly payments and now you can go direct from London Gatwick. Nothing beats a Jet 2 holiday. Package holidays you can trust. After a night of protected, subject to availability conditions. It's crazy if somebody wore that to... And you wouldn't know? You wouldn't know. You can't tell? I'm imagining like a fucking... Like when a t-shirt looks like a tuxedo, you know what I mean? You're right. No, it is like that. No, it's not like that. It has a tie. They will send you home from one of those workspace rental offices if you wore that. Bring up Suitsy. They go, I know you're... Yeah, yeah, yeah. At a Regis. They'd be like, I know this is your own time, you're renting it here, but we can't have you in the building. We don't have a Dress Code, but it's definitely not that. You can't wear fucking suit pajamas. Guess who's getting a Suitsy for his birthday this year? Me? Look at that. Yeah, you can do the win with the Suitsy. Look at that. I love a Suitsy. Look at that. Bobby. Look at this guy. You're ready to rock, dude. Hey, babe, take out the Suitsy so we can have a thing. You know how easy it is to fucking bag a chick and get back into your Suitsy and get out of there? Yeah, I hate when I have to bag a chick and get back into my suit. Look at that. That looks like a regular suit. We're in awful Walker shame. They go, it's hot as shit out. Why don't you take your jacket off? It's attached to the shirt, which is attached to the pants, which is attached to the shoes and underwear. I mean, it's a spring fall suit. You go to the bathroom and the cubicle next to you. The guy has all his clothes on the ground having a shit. You've been dancing all night. Take your jacket off, man. I can't. What happened? I got piss on my jacket. I got piss on my jacket shirt and pants. I just don't understand what problem this solves. This solves the problem of being fat and having to tuck a shirt in, right? So all the time when you're fat, as soon as you tuck it in, it's one move, one sit, and everything pops out. Yeah, it's like a one piece. So it's like if you worked at a garage, but you thought it'd be funnier for that cover alls to be a suit. You think it's funny that when you come out from underneath a dolly, or that changes someone's, oh, oil, you come out and you're wearing a fucking three piece suit. Your job is removing as fast as possible. Everyone else is wearing hats and hats suits. And you go, hey, guys. Always dressed for the occasion. I like to joke around here. Bobby loves the idea of these. You can start on the washer as one piece. And I'm sure it dries not fucking wrinkly as balls and anti-wrinkle. I don't think it's a joke. Anti-wrinkle is a fake thing. No, it doesn't exist. They have new suit. The suit I just got is the anti-wrinkle. It's a new type of material. It's a new, I swear to God. It's metal. The suit I just got is waterproof and wrinkle proof. You could just throw it in a bag. It's a suit. And yeah, the suit jacket. It's a bad suit. No, it's a great. It looks fantastic. So the nicest suits in the world aren't also tactical. Stainless. You never hear that. Stainless shirt. I got a John Barbados suit. Dude, he goes, you could pour oil on this thing. It would slide right off. It's like, that's scotch guarded. Go out of it with the scissors. Go out of it with the scissors. Non-wrinkle waterproof suit. Attack it with scissors. You try it. It actually is nice proof. You got nothing. You're going to look ridiculous. It's made of chain mail. Bobby's wearing night pajamas. There it is right there. I was always thinking when we were looking at Suitsie, I was like, wow, he could have run a steamer over this thing before this video. He looks slumpy. Yeah. Well, I look slumpy. No, but not behind the Suitsie video. The Suitsie video. I didn't even like, I don't know if that. I don't know if that's wrinkle proof. That was the fifth or sixth. That's the first version. The new Suitsie has. The Suitsie 2.0. Suitsie 2.0. Yes, Suitsie 2.0 has. It's a stab proof, wrinkle proof, fire proof. Sure, sure. Bullet proof. It's a John Wick collection. I love that. It's just an Ironman. You're in the Ironman suit for a while. Fighting crime in between the vases. I'm wearing my zip up suit. Jarvis, tell me somewhere this is appropriate. Jarvis, Jarvis. To be fair, when I was fatter, the Suitsie was more appealing to me. Sure. Why? Because I just. That's the worst. Look at your, look at your, look at your, look at your mascot of a guy in a suit. It did come with a helmet. Yeah. Big head. Yeah. Give it up for the Yukon Society men. And then you come out on a fucking horse with a giant head. You should have a giant head to go on top of that suit. A big giant fake head of you on top of the suit for sure. This one looks better in picture, but they got a model. You guys have money. Now you could just get tailored suits and look fucking pristine. That's what I did. Yeah, I had my wedding. You looked amazing. Yeah, I got, I got a tailored Hugo Boss. And then I got a custom suit. Hugo Boss. You know that's fucking Hitler's fucking. That's why I got it. That's what the Nazis wore. That's why I got it. I got a wagon beetle to get it. I had a guy, you had the guy, the guy from Japan make your suit. Ari's guy. Yeah, I wish I did that. He's extremely fair priced. Yeah. Does it look good? It looked great. I think it was really good. Yeah, so far. I wore the other one at our story awards at the Grammar Seat. I look good too. Yeah, I got a blue and a black one. I'm trying to schedule myself the next time he does a trunk show. Yeah. Yeah, next time you do, I'm getting one too. I know exactly what I want. Yeah. I'm doing it. I'm just doing it. I'm just doing it. Do you do suits? Just shake them. I'm just like, can you put a zipper in the front of this? Bobby, do me a favor. Also order a suit see? So when Dawn and everybody gets mad, she goes, are you wearing a fucking, do you get a tailored suit right down to the fucking pocket scar or the pocket square? And you go, babe, look, we can go to your family's thing, move me dress like this or like this, and then put on your suit see. Right after you put on a tailored suit, take it off and put a suit see on. Like, I could just go like this. She's like, what are you a fucking, like, yeah, you look like a fucking, like a child's toy king. You gotta take the jacket off for a puddle. I'm going to. I can't even, I can't even rest you a damsel in distress with my suit see. In fact, you have to hold your entire suit between your legs. If you take a shit, you have to hold your whole suit between your legs, between your knees. Yeah. So it doesn't get on the floor, but you're fucking naked in a bathroom at a ball. But I could be Superman really good. True. That would be great having a suit see if Superman has a suit see it'd be easier to turn into Superman. Because you know, they always just show him opening up the buttons, but then he had to go and take the pants off the shoes off. I bet you have to be so retarded to order the suit see that most people that order the suit see plan to wear them over a superhero costume. I would say that's the most obvious thing because it looks a little bit better than if your whole outfit was Velcro. If I get a suit see if I get a shirt that has an S on it underneath. They offer you that on checkout. Would you like to. Would you like Superman? There you go. There you go. Customers also looked at Superman, Spider-Man, gallon of ice cream. If you get a big enough suit see you can get a fucking. He's got a gallon of ice cream. If you get a big enough suit see you can put all kinds of things on there. I got a gallon of ice cream, depression, medication. Actually just take it off and be in your boxers, but tape all that stuff to your head like that guy you like on the Internet and be that superhero. That'd be great. I'm watermelon tape chicken man. If the Suits came with underwear that'd be a great little option. Fuck off. What is that? That's a Suitsy tuxedo. Yeah. Fucking what dude? You wouldn't get that? It does look good. It looks good. Fantastic. Buddy a tuxedo sucks. You can own a tuxedo for how much? Those are all Suitsies. Wait, wait, wait, wait. No, they're not. No, no, no. If you're looking Suits.ie. You asshole, Christine. That's an Irish Suits.ie. That is beautiful, beautiful Suits. When did Bobby come to the Irish Suits Company? I can't stand Christine's dumbness sometimes. Buddy, I don't know when you bought your Suitsy, because it looks like there was a- I didn't buy a Suitsy. You didn't, right? Because in 2014, they were trying to crowdfund Suitsy, and then it never went anywhere. No. Nothing happened. He's not on Facebook. I got the wrinkle-free waterproof suit. Because Suitsy was so bad, it never got off the grid. That's not true. People like you, and you in 2012, you saw it on Kickstarter. I'm googling Suitsy, googling Suitsy. I get this, that's not it. Because it doesn't exist, because it's so bad. Maybe Suitsy wasn't the name, though. She really came at you hard for her. Yeah, she did. She did, because she doesn't like fat people. No, it's not that. That's actually true. She's almost never right, and she really fucking buried you on that one. Because she felt bad. You are in love with a defunct product, and you said- By the way, you said, that's the old Suitsy. The new Suitsy's better, there was never Suitsy. There's a lie. It was an idea. That was a bit we were doing, dum-dum. What? We were doing a bit with the 2.0. I said, the new Suitsy has this, it was a joke. Okay. It was. It was. The new Suitsy was updated. It's a comedy show, we're hams here. I said the new Suitsy's updated, and then he said 2.0. It was just a joke. It's a fucking shitty product, that's all. Beaser. The beat. The thumbnail of him looks like a schlub. Every Suitsy picture. Suitsy sucks. So this is a product that was on Kickstarter, never had a market. Well, because of people like you, and people like in this room. You don't understand the benefits. Don't believe, they don't believe- The time saving. But he did get a fucking other suit made out of slicker, apparently. It's so funny, he went and got a regular suit with the money he raised on Kickstarter. He probably got a really nice suit. Well, I like that red one. What's that red one? It's not a Suitsy. But you know what? Lev showed up to my wedding, and he was wearing one of those on-tucket shirts, and he had like no shirt, no tie or nothing. He looked like a real slopp. He showed up to my wedding, like the way everyone else ends a wedding. Like at the end of the night. And Lev too was like, it was also hot, so Lev started sweating. He was sweating. Oh yeah, yeah. It was hot as hell. It's a fact I think. Yeah, he showed up like he came from someone else's wedding. It's a fact I think. I've done the no tie, no tuck. The on-tucket, no tie. I've done it, and it is sloppy looking. Walt halfway through the fucking- I've tried not to do it. I've tried not to do- Boom! Knocking shit over. I've tried not to do untucked shirt to a wedding sport, but I've also, I've just done it. No tie is fine. You just gotta get through the first like 35 minutes, and then you can go nuts. Yeah, but that's the most embarrassing part. Put the tie around your head. As soon as they go, I do, and then you're just like, huh, and then you're untucking, and then tying, and then you got fat. Well you know, the reason I got those, the two Suits made was because Becky Owens' wedding when I went, and I said I brought pants that had no belt loop, I had lost weight, so I had put the belt on like a fucking Huck Finn over the pants, and then basically, no, I mean, I could put the belt on, because there was no belt loops on the pants, it was the issue. They were supposed to be suspender pants, I didn't know that. Joe had to go outside and cut a hose off? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He had an extension cord or something? I was definitely in the Country Bears band, and I had my button down shirt like untucked from it on next, I really didn't have any choice, it was like, oh you're gonna, it was ridiculous, but I tried to do tucked in. Now the Suits, now I'd be like, now there's a Suits. You've lost weight, you got the tailored suit. If there's a chance to wear a suit now this morning, you go, oh well. I could wear a suit now. The suit I bought is pretty good, but I have, I have, I have a range of fats in my suits, because I got custom suits made before, but they were, when I was on sex drugs, I had to wear a suit in one of the things, so they had two suits made for me, but I was fat, so I have three different versions of my fatness in suit sizes in my closet. Well I went to FatComics, started deciding to go and wear a suit at one point, and you have to be, you gotta go loud, like the zany fat guy who wears a suit on stage, you know what I mean, it's not a suit even, it's like he wears like a sports coat, it's a wacky color. I remember when Colin was fat, he did the NACA Convection, the national one, excuse me, and it was 3,000 people, and he had to follow Lewis Black who murdered, and then I remember I was there so excited to see Colin, because I knew him from the cellar, I really wasn't friends with him that much, a little bit, and I sat right up front, and he came out in a purple, but he was heavy, so he was fat in a purple suit, they had him on Trinitron and then he, then he bombed, and I remember at one point, they had him on the big screens on the side, and he turned his head, and I just saw a sweat fat thing roll down his rolls on his neck, and he was like, well folks. You gotta see this thing, you gotta see him on The Cosby Show when he was Davey, bring that up Christine, Davey something. Heavy then, wasn't he? He was heavy on the Gary... Was he pretty, was he heavy on the? Gary Shandler? I don't know if he was heavy on The Cosby Show. Gary Shandler's show, he was at one of his fattest, and he comes in dressed as a UPS worker with the shorts, and you can see his little fat legs and his fat stomach. Well, is it one thing, one of his specialties comes out wearing skinny jeans and like an eight ball jacket, and like sits on the stage and smokes. It was a Pittsburgh Pirates jacket. Oh yeah, yeah. And then he had chains, and he thought he'd just sit on the edge of the stage. Come on, hey I'm gonna do something different. Oh, what a twat. What a twat he looked like. Oh God. He goes, I'm gonna do things a little different. Smoke, talk to you for the time being. He was doing the chappelle before chappelle, huh? Oh yeah, but I mean sitting on the ledge of the stage. Not sitting on a chair or a stool on stage. At the start of the day, his feet just dangling off the stage. And then they're gonna have to like fucking realize the lights and change. Everybody tell you this. Exactly, he didn't tell anybody, he just did it. You can see the camera guy pan down. Oh fuck. Davey Herbeck, that was his name on the show. And he goes, I'm losing my mind. It was his big like a... I have that episode I'm just trying to get to it. No one picked up the Cosby show for streaming. Come on, let's get over it everybody. Those girls are all dead by now. Oh, he's eating a hoagie. He loves hoagies. He is still a foot off your treasure everybody. What happened to the pudding pop? I loved it. The pudding pop is gone. It's not like he had his own brand of pudding. He was the guy for Jello pudding and then they started making pudding pops, which he was the first pitch man for. The pudding pop was good, the problem. He was the guy. Yeah, that's when Eddie Murphy was like pudding pop. The problem with the pudding pop was that it's a strange... Really? What was the problem? Please, please. I'll tell you what it was. I'm telling you now, you want to know what the problem was with the pudding pop. Problem with the pudding pop. I'm going to let you know now. I'm going to let you know. I really want to know what the problem was. It was a frozen dessert, but like as you were eating it, it got like warm but didn't change shape. Yeah. The pudding frozen, it wasn't like cold like a popsicle. It was more jello-y. You get like taffy-ish almost by the end. But I mean, it melted for sure, but it's just a pudding pop. We all love the pudding pop. Oh, we all love the pudding pop. What are we doing? Are we looking at Colin Quentin now? Yeah, I'm trying to buy that episode. Davey Huraback? Don't buy it. It's not that worth it. You guys are doing well, huh? It all goes to Cosby's Defense Fund. It all goes to his little nest egg. We're trying to make sure he can enjoy his Twilight Ears Cosby himself. This goes directly to Cosby. That's why I buy the episodes once a day. I'm on his Patreon. He does a morning stream. Guys, get ready to attack the day. Conquer your inner bitch. Today is... He's roguing. He's roguing it by... Conquer your inner bitch. Yeah, someone has your money in their pocket. Your workout is my warm-up. Was your Cosby fucking Clinton? Yeah, you get it. I did. I did. I got it. And you blip and you boop and you zapp and you zippin'. Zippin' zappin', zippin' zappin'. Jacob, we're gonna have so many good looks for you. It's insane. I'm most excited to put together your hip-hop look. There's so many different versions of hip-hop. I would like to put together your cowboy look. Yeah. I think I've got that one. I'm gonna do your Victorian look. When you come out with big frills coming out of a buffer jacket. But don't worry, you're gonna have a sword. You might have a sword. You could also have a gun that only shoots one bolt at a time. You could be... Oh, you know, you could have a little... Like a pen knife guy. You could be like a little pen knife guy. Yeah. And then you do the fucking hand thing. That's pretty dope. You know what you should do, too? You know, that black prostitute. That black porn star would know you're there. Absolutely know you were there. We could let Colin help with your Alaskan fisherman look with the pen knife. Yeah. Davey Herbeck? We got him? He's losing his mind. Maybe you can... Because the problem I'm having is the... It's when these bitches bring home a video tape. So it's giving me the episode number 421, but the title of 422. So do you know which one of these episodes it would be? Home for the Weekend. Home for the Weekend. I do know that. It's when Denise comes home for the Weekend. That's nuts. I can separate the art from the artist. Yeah, but you really know it. You know your shit. It's weird. Well, I grew up watching the show. Bobby was a little bit older than me and also on Kraken. He was racist. He was also on Kraken at that point. He was 13. Colin's right too. My mom took care of him. We can all be right. Yeah, Jay was a little mommy boy in his stomach. Eating TV dinners, watching TV shows. Eating, putting pop. Yeah, Jay was raised like an alien. Yeah, you were duking it out in the orphanage or whatever you were doing. You see they bring home a video tape. Denise Holmes with her friends. They come back with Davey Herbeck. Not yet. Not yet. Davey Herbeck's coming. Oh, God. There he is. Oh, they're all back. They're all getting ready to watch Davey Herbeck. Go ahead. It's going to be the scene for sure. Colin's in this episode? Yeah, they're watching him right now. Man, Lisa Bonnet was so fun. On TV? Yeah. Nope. For the love of God. Past it. What are you doing? She passed it. You must have missed it. Yeah, go ahead. So. Remember he died because there was no Bobby there? That's right. Well, actually he inspired me to go out there and save. And save Lex? Yeah. Yeah. If he didn't die, that girl would have died. They're watching Davey Herbeck. All these young girls getting ready to watch the film. So Colin wasn't on the show. He was on the TV on the show. Yes. And he played a guy called Davey. Davey Herbeck. He's a wild man. He's supposed to be like Sam Kinnison. Oh, okay. But Gallagher. It's a Gallagher Sam Kinnison. He's like breaking shit. Let's see it. Is that the very, very end? By the way, she walked him home? Well, I better be going back to my house. Oh, your sisters are here. I was going to suck your brother off, but forget it. Is she flirting with that fucking brother? Yeah. Kind of. Yeah. A year after this, Mickey Rock fucking fucked him in the butt. Oh, did he? Yeah, he did. She did a movie. Just jump 10 second jumps. Angel Hook. He's a fucking great guy. He's a great guy. He's a great guy. He's a great guy. He's a great guy. It's a great movie. Just jump 10 second jumps. Angel Heart. Apparently, they banged for real. Yep. Guess what you want to tell yourself. That's the rumor. We literally have one minute left. I mean, it looks real. Wait, hang on. They're watching old Davey here. Now go back. Go back. Go back. How long is the honor fuck? Just four seconds? Yeah. It's the shortest little. The shortest little. Oh, he's showing them the western movie. Throw down that box. Now. Throw down that box. How do you remember this? I don't know. Skip ahead. They change it and put in Davey Herbeck. This sounds like me. Here we go. Dangerous Davey Herbeck. I'm going to call him that. Oh my God. What the fuck? We went through all that. He's just losing his mind. That's it? I don't know. I think it might be another scene. That's like when they like squeeze in like hidden messages into movies. It's like they show one more. I think we come back to it. Oh, that was so not worth it. He wasn't as fat as I hoped. He wasn't fat at all. He was actually almost bone thin. I didn't say he was fat though. I think he was drinking then. I just said he was Davey Herbeck. That would seem like the coke years. I'm going to call him that. We should all call him Davey Herbeck. Dangerous Davey Herbeck. Dangerous. Dangerous Column Terrell is going to be at the Riot Riverwalk Comedy Club. Go to Column Terrell. C-O-L-U-M-T-Y-R-R-E-L-L Column Terrell.com and check out the Cock Fight Podcast with Column Terrell and Lev Ferre wherever you listen to podcasts. Bobby Kelly this weekend for tickets and all of his tour dates. Go to punchup.live.com, Bobby Kelly, Robert Kelly, and of course his YouTube page Robert Kelly Comedy. And of course every Tuesday night, 7 p.m. at Fatback Pussycat Lounge, the Comedy Seller. BigJComedy.com and then YouTube.com. He's also going to be at BigJoker's and for specials. And he also does his live show up there which is hilarious and seems to be doing quite well. Thanks, Todd. Yeah. Column, thank you so much for hanging out with us. Thanks buddy. Thanks for filling in buddy. I appreciate it. Enjoy the pre-record. We got a fun topic for that that we're going to continue with. If you guys can just be cool. Can you just be cool? Crackle, crackle. Grab the unrivaled Samsung Galaxy S26 Ultra with an incredible privacy display on EE, the UK's best network. You can save £20 per month plus claim a Samsung Galaxy Tab S10 Lite. Now we're talking. So get yours today. Offer ends 28th of May. This is my best network at EE.cuddy.cash claims.