#631 - Free Magic

Good day, good week, holiday Christmas. Merry Christmas to everyone who is alive. I guess I could start, you know, because yeah, and ghosts, I guess if there's some ghost, ghosts, I guess do they celebrate things like that? I guess they do. Yeah. I wonder if it's fun celebrating something if you're a ghost or not? I wonder if you have a lot of friends if you're a ghost. Because a lot of times people see one ghost, so we're like, oh, we call it, you know, somebody saw this ghost or whatever. He was hiding behind a tree or something. He was just being scared, you know. You know, like, whoo, just doing vows or whatever, just whoo, you know. But they never like, oh, yeah, we saw some, with some ghosts, some dope-ass ghosts that were just fucking bawling, that were hooping or something. Or just like, yeah, we saw some ghosts. They were vaping and, you know, laughing together and maybe splitting a brownie or something, or just doing like something fun. I get, yeah, I don't know. I never really thought about that. What are... Yeah. So I don't, yeah. Anyway, it doesn't matter. All that matters is, um, is the spirit. The spirit of Christmas, that's what's going on right now. It's that time you hear the music, that's what gets me into it, you know. They say it's Christmas. They say it's Christmas. Now a lot of the, a lot of the radio channels now, it's like very Latino. You know, it's like, um, they said the newborn king, ma-rampa-pum-pum. And then you'll have one. They said the new parking, pa-rampa-pum-pum-pum-pum-pum-pum-pum-pum-pum. That's what's up, bro. Last night we let the liquor talk. But yeah, I love the Christmas, the Christmas, the energy. That's what I got to embrace. You know, see somebody, you just, just give them a little hug or if they don't like you to hug them, I'll do this sometimes. I still take two hands, tap them on the shoulder like that, give them that little penguin hug, that little, that little perverted butterfly hug. Just pa-pa-pum-pum-pum-pum-pum-pum. Just let them, some people don't like a damn hug. Some people don't like a hug and sometimes I don't. Sometimes I'm a cactus. Don't touch me. But sometimes I just wanna, I just wanna hug. I won't ask for a hug, though. That's who I am. I ain't no hug. You feel me? Oh, oh, oh, sorry. I know Santa gets offended if you say I ain't no hug. Because that's his thing. But, yeah, you know, I won't ask for a hug. I'll stand by you and look like I need a hug or do some, or just do some shit like this, you know? What's up? Ba-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra. But I'm gonna be the one to ask for a hug. But I'll need a hug. But I won't ask for a hug. Now I'll stand by you like, you know, I'll loiter. I'll loiter right around your arms and chest. But I won't ask for that hug, but I need it. But I won't ask for it. So that's kinda who I am. Let's just listen to a little music to get us in the spirit. And then we're just gonna get into some calls from you guys. And thank you so much. Thank you so much for just letting us be together right now. That's really nice. Here we go right here. This is some sounds we like to check out every year. And this is Christmas Miracle by One Man Quartet. Mmm, that's nice. Mmm, what's happening, Holtz? This is like nighttime kind of. There's a candle maybe. This is Santa. We're waiting for Santa. Everything's out in the kids are asleep. This is kind of the ambiance that's in the energy downstairs. If you sneak downstairs and look at the tree. That was the most fun. That was the most fun as a kid was sneaking down there and looking. But I always hear it. And you knew he wasn't there. It was just like 10.30 at night, the Christmas Eve. And you go down there. And you eat all my siblings would all like we had to come down the stairs and then go like around the edge of the wall and then you could kind of see the living room and stuff. There was still like a little dinner table but then you had it. Then you could see the living room. And yeah, that was just like his ear. Daddy come. And we would all kind of like bottle neck at the bottom of the stairs in our pajamas and shit and we would be like, no, you're not going. You're not going. And our sisters, they were little. They're like, fuck, you know, they didn't have any rights or whatever at the time because they were women also. And so we had a student like, you're not going. We'll tell you what we see. You know, and they're like, tell the dogs what you say. And then we sneak around and then once we got around, my brother was older than me. So then he took jurisdiction, you know, but he also had bad eyesight. He was born. I think his levels and his eyes were off. He had, you know, he didn't have enough water in his eyes or something. He'd have to fucking, you know, he'd have to splash water in his fucking eyes every 40 minutes. So we could even get a gander in at anything. Shit, I remember at his birthday, he'd miss the candles if he didn't rub a little bit of water in his eyes just to kind of, you know, sometimes if you, if you heat up some, if you heat up some leftovers, you, like I'll dribble a water on them. That's how that's me. I'll crack open a leftover if it's in a container. I'll pour, you know, about a 11th of a cup of water on that, whatever. Don't care what it is. Lazagna, piece of bread, whatever, fissiah, whatever's going on, you know, hint to, hint to spice, hint to tomato. I will pour, I'll just drip that bitch out and then put it in the micro and bam. But that was like my brother. If we didn't, you know, if mom didn't spray a little bit of water in his eyes right before he blew out the candles on his birthday, he'd keep miss that bitch. He'd just be spraying a, he'd spray just, just be spraying a cold right out of another distance, miss a whole cake. But anyway, so at that point, you know, my brother would be like, and once it, once we turned the corner of the stairs, it was me and him. So my sisters were like at the back and, and they didn't know shit. And they only knew what we told them and we lied to them because we were family. And so we would go and have to get closer to the tree and sneak up. And my mom's bedroom was right off of the living room. And so we had to be quiet and the carpet was kind of wet because our apartment was sinking a little bit like by the kitchen area. And so you fucking broke your knees was starting getting all wet, you know, but it helped my brother because he could just put his hands into the carpet and then rubbed it with his eyes and activate those bitches. So we would get closer and be like, is he here? And then we would just see, we would see the tree and the lights and it would just kind of look like it had during the daytime a little bit. Definitely more mysterious in nighttimey and the stockings. And it was all just kind of magical. It was just like a thing of like possibility, you know, what were we going to get? What was going to happen tomorrow? Everything was going to be great. Something new was coming, you know, it was just, yeah, there was just, I don't know, there was just something just so magical about that scenario. And I remember we had the colored lights on the Christmas tree and I didn't really like them. They looked a little cheesy, I thought sometimes, but at this time at night, it just looked kind of nice and the stockings just hanging there. And he was like, we have to just up all go back, go back. I'd probably be like, go back, you little f***ing inner whatever. And I'm like, what? And then we get back to the stairs. And my sister's be like, what did you see? I'm like, fuck you. You don't know shit. Because yeah, we just as kind of family were. But yeah, there was just something beautiful about it, but no, we'd be like, he's not here. Or sometimes we would do this. Yes, all the gifts are out there. He already came, but you guys have to go to bed. We would kind of take the superior role with a lie. Maybe they already came, but you guys have to go to bed. Or maybe he's not coming. I don't know. We're one of y'all bad this year. What have you guys been doing? Who's been showing their tits or whatever out on the street? Right by the highway because we did live by highway right next to that bitch. Like if your hair was wet in the morning, you could put it right outside. It's like hang it out the window at the apartment. And in the morning, you know, that was high traffic time. And if enough semi-aswan bothers, the wind would whip up and just dry your shit right into a beautiful look. God, you'd look good. And people are like, what are you having your hair? You're like fucking 18 speed. You know, I got a damn, I got a damn mat. I got a, uh, just a new winds off a mat truck. So, but that was fun, man. That was a good time. And that, that music reminds me of that a little bit. God, those memories were nice. You know, memories are so nice because it can really take you into a place. Um... Uh... Oh, this is another, this is another song. This is hip hop ready for Christmas. Let's listen a little bit of this. Okay. Type shit. Okay, this one Christmas is gonna get a little bit black. You know what I'm saying? I'm gonna pull in a, this is gonna look like, say if you're a white guy and you see it, you're in high school and you see your sister talking to, uh, flirting with a black guy and you're okay with it. This is the kind of music that backs that up. Like, I, okay, go ahead, Allison, she doing her shit. So that's that kind of, that's a Christmas beat right there. I feel like that kind of fits, you know? Yeah, if you see your sister flirting with a black guy at school and you're okay with it. That's that heartbeat right there, that black heartbeat. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, dude, you ever heard a black heartbeat? That's shit. This different bro, go put your ear up to a black guy's chest, dude, which I know, has very dangerous, right? Overall, it's, yeah, black, they're not going to welcome that. They're not, they're not going to do it, you know, a lot of them turn, turn into that guy. Who's that guy on, uh, that place for golden state or whatever, that always beat people in the media act like it was okay all the time. He would just punch white dudes. Drainmon? Yes. Yes. That dude. That, yeah, which shit seemed hella racial to me, but, um, but yeah. That dude that was always, he, I think he did hit a mixed guy also, but, um, yeah. So I'm just saying, some guys, you can put your ear up to their chest. They'll be, they might be okay with it. Some guys might get Drainmon on you. Uh, but I think a black heartbeat is different. It should got drums. It got probably some 808s, trap beat. Like if you ever go to a doctor's office and he puts the stethoscope and he puts it up to a black guy's heart, he'll listen to them for 20 minutes. There's different tracks. There's fucking, you'll have somebody feed. Heat your on somebody's heartbeat. You're like, holy shit, this heartbeat has, there's a, you know, there's little dorks on it. You know, this is, there's a young boy and Bailey Zimmerman, like, what's going on? So like, damn, holy shit, what do you, you got some big ex the plug in you? So there's that, that happens where the white heartbeat is just like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. That black heartbeat that's just got, it's got symbols. It's got, um, it's just got different, you know, it's got different levels. They got a horn section. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, that's just trapping, bro. So that's what I'm saying, bro. This shit has a little bit of that black heartbeat vibe right here. You we, you we see you say, you we. So there we go. A little bit more Christmas music right there getting into it. We did have some calls that came in. The hotline is always 985664 9503. And we had talked about some things in the last episode we'd spoken about, you know, people doing different challenges. There was a November where you grow out of a mustache for epilepsy or whatever. I can't remember. Um, or there was six shit, uh, June or whatever. What was it? 16 shit, June. Yeah. 16 shit, June where people were only doing 16, um, deficits in June. For, um, to support seizures or whatever, I'm not even sure what it was. I think it was seizures. Let me see. Let me look at 16. Sorry. 16 shit. You for seizures. Yeah. Yeah. For seizures. So you had that. You had no nut, no, Vember. You had 40 fart marks. You had all these different things that people are trying to do to support to raise causes. You know, like, remember a couple years ago, they were dumping ice on, uh, on people with down syndrome or whatever to help them out. Uh, but yeah, anyway, we had some calls in with people saying, well, what were the, what were similar things like that that they'd had in their time? Is there another one that you remember, Trevin? Um, I think it was actually 11 shit, June to get specific. So less than, ooh. Anyways, um, talking about a call that came in that I remembered. No, was there any other ones that you remembered that people do annually? Oh, yeah. Um, 2000 step timber. Oh, yes. People only taking a certain amount of steps in a certain month. Oh, so broctober. That's another one. That's a big one. So there's these things that start to happen. Um, and then people called in with a few of their own. So let's hit them right here. Here we go. Hey, see, oh, this is sunny from Phoenix, Arizona. And I just wanted to tell you that every sunny, it's sunny and faint. Phoenix. Hey, come on, guy. Well, young wall is. Sorry. But that's a sign I would make if I were a cat. I'd be like, and then every now and then I'd be like, you're a f***er or whatever. Anyway, let's hear more brother. Thank you for calling. Every year here in Phoenix, we do a little thing called no burr, october. Is where you don't actually get cold all october long. Okay. And you know, it's actually not something that anyone is trying to do. It's just circuastantially so hot here in Phoenix that no one ever gets cold the entire month of October. You have to wear like no shirt on Halloween. You got to wear a slutty costume on Halloween just to survive. I don't know. It's not like you're just trying to meet guys or whatever out there. But whatever dude, I agree with you. It's a very sunburned area. I lived out there in Tucson for a little while. You'll get sunburn just looking at, you know, you go outside and you're sunburned. You don't know what to do. Dude, I would go to get the mail and I wouldn't know how to get back home. I would be dehydrated. I would have to, you know, I'd have to have somebody from the cartel help me get back to my yard, have a higher a coyote to get me to. So yeah, it's alarmingly hot out there. But you know it. That's the crazy thing. Sometimes people are like, man, it's, I can't believe it. It's so hot today. Like no shit. It was, it was hot yesterday. It was hot 700 days ago. It was hot 58 days ago. So you just don't know patterns. That's the problem. You don't know how patterns work, dude. But um, bum, bum, bum, the deer, the ring, deer's are coming. Dude, the first time you had a Mexican dude like singing, um, like Christmas carols, that like early Mexican dudes that came to America, they didn't fucking know the words to them, bitches, homie. They did not know the words to the Christmas carols, you know? They'd be like, I'm dreaming of both of it. Christmas, more whites and others. You know, they'd be changing the lyrics to try to diversify the portfolio a bit. And I respected my dash, you know, just kind of wild, you know? Maybe like, um, arudo, pared, no surrenders, yere, man, yeah, eh, eh, baby. They were just fucking kind of, eh, what's up, huh? Let me see that skirt, mommy. You're like, what the fuck? Anyway, let's hear another one that came in. Yeah, no burr. It's no burr out there. I didn't cold it all. Let's see. What we got here, another one came on. What up, Dale? Jason here. Good day, Jason and happy, um, Merry Christmas to you, brother. Onward. Uh, so you asked on episode 69 to give some recommendations for things like no, no, not in November and such. I, one of the coolest ones that I started doing about five years ago was everyday of May Challenge. So for every day of May, I do a certain amount of push ups. It started off with every day of May, I'm going to do 100 push ups, uh, two years ago, my everyday of May Challenge was every day of May, I'll do 500 push ups a day, every 500 push ups, man, you're going to be up, but then you're going to be as up, all the way up. What? That's amazing. Oh, man, every day of May, I'll do 500 push ups a day, every day of May, I'm going every day of May. I think it's a really good thing to push on to people. I think it's a great way to kick off. It's like the middle of the year. We've kind of all pissed off with our, you know, we stopped doing our yearly, what they call it, New Year's Revolution at New Years. Yeah, you don't even know what it's called, dude. So obviously you're not getting it done. And that's fine. Sorry. Go on, more more resolutions where you, you know, I'm going to work out this year. Everyone's kind of stopped already. But, but you know about that once since you did not call it out, want to let you know that love you feel all of us fans love you is the best. Thank you, brother. I appreciate the nice words, man. Every day in May, that's a nice one. Because it kind of takes on a challenge, you know, like once there was this thing that was going around a while back, it was like 76 hard or something. And it was like you had to meet somebody that was born in 1976 and show him your cock. You feel me? Anyway, yeah. But that, yeah, something that's what you would hear. I guess an old trucker joke. But, but yeah, I like that every day in May because that you're saying, hey, I'ma do something here. Because people have New Years revolutions and then bitches are horrible, you know. My buddies was like, yeah, he's like, I'm not going to stalk my ex. And I'm going to learn a new language. I'm like, cool. That's good. It's a lot, you know, it just could be a lot. So anyway, I don't know what I'm talking about. Who cares? It's the end of the year, dude. I'm I used up all my good words throughout the year. I'm at the bottom of the bag, dude. I'm just down here shaking vowels around, you know. You know what stopped me from investing in the past was just said, I didn't know. I didn't know the value of putting away a little bit at a time. I didn't know that it builds on itself that it can create more, which can create more. I didn't know that time was really my greatest asset. I felt like I just didn't have enough money at the time. Acorns is the financial wellness app that cares about where your money is going tomorrow. Acorns is a smart way to give your money a chance to grow. It's easy. You can sign up in minutes and start automatically investing your spare money. Even if all you've got is spare change, sign up now and join the over 14 million all-time customers who have already saved and invested over $27 billion with Acorns. Plus Acorns will boost your new account with a $20 bonus investment offer available at acorns.com slash Theo. That's a C-O-R-N-S dot com slash THEO to get your $20 bonus investment today. Terms and conditions apply. C acorns dot com slash terms paid non-client endorsement. Compensation provides incentive to positively promote Acorns tier 2 compensation provided potential study to various factors such as customers accounts, age and investment settings. Does that include Acorns fees? Results in uppertitore, represent the forms of acorns portfolio. Investing involves risk acorns and I'll see SEC register investment advisor. The important description is that Acorns dot com slash THEO. Paramount Plus is the new home of UFC. That's right, fans. Starting in January, you can stream every UFC fight live with your Paramount Plus subscription. Tune in for marquee numbered events featuring MMA's biggest stars and epic fight nights that showcase hungry contenders from all weight classes. Set the stage with pre-fight interviews and training camp access through UFC countdown and UFC embedded. Miss about? Don't sweat it. Paramount Plus will have replays and highlights of all the events. You can also check out the archives to relive iconic championship fights and unforgettable finishes. UFC fans, this is a whole new era. It's time to say goodbye to pay-per-view and hello to Paramount Plus. Stream every fight live with one subscription. Visit paramountplus dot com slash UFC to get started. That's paramount plus dot com slash UFC. That's a good one every day in May. Here we go. We got another one that came in. Hey, CEO, this is Charlie from Cincinnati. Charlie from Cincinnati. Shout out, Charlie, boy. I just wanted to call in and comment on the, you know, you're talking about 2000 step 10 burly guy. Oh, what do you say? 11 shit June? It's 16, but yes, onward. You know, me and my family, a lot of times around the holidays, what we'll do, you know, we'll do a, uh, and maybe not me personally, but I know, uh, a lot of a lot of the ladies in my family, they like to do a 40-quee quantum. You know what? 40-quee, quanza. Wow. Yeah, I, um, yeah, I, I, I, I, I don't even know it, you know, gazooontite. Uh, yeah, let me get you it. Let me get your family a box at clean hex, brother. Let's hear more, brother. As you know, when I'm saying, uh, let me know if, uh, if you know anybody in, uh, in your life that likes to do a 40-quee quantum, let me let you know, I don't know. You told us about it. So I don't even know about it. That's new to me. Um, but that's a great one. That is a great one, man. And that's tough. I think to, uh, I don't know how you exactly arrange that. Because I don't know if that's a seasonal thing. I don't know if that's definitely like something that happens more in the spring to women because of, uh, pollen. If that's a bigger, if that brings it on or whatever, um, all right, let's get another couple of calls here that came in. Uh, Theo, uh, I've been, uh, I've been watching you for a while and I really like, uh, I really, it really helps, uh, with the situations people go through hearing them out and, uh, it just makes everything easier. Right now I'm going through a situation. I didn't ever think I would be the one to be calling you, but I just, things end up how they are. I just need some advice right now and I don't know what to do. Um, my girlfriend, um, I've been with my girlfriend for four years and okay, thank you, brother, for sharing that information. Let's hear more. Um, she's basically, I'm, I'm 22 to start off from 22. She's 19. We started, we started dating young, uh, about four years ago and, uh, she really changed my life and I was in on the right path and, uh, she helped me out a lot and she got me through addiction. She got me through all my problems in my life and I left my house to be with her. I left my home with my family when I was 18 years old. I wasn't living in an ideal spot. So I decided to leave and pursue a life with her and we, it's, it's, it's, we've been up and down over the years, but it just came to a point where I guess she got bored or hired or, I don't know if she'd, she just lost interest in me and we recently decided to split, not split, but just like take a break and I left the apartment that we lived in for a little bit to go be with my family just for like a month or two just to take some time apart and, um, I just received the text a week ago that she ended up getting pregnant by another guy. Ooh. And, um, it's just, uh, the turrets I just don't know what to do. I don't know who to tell. I don't know. Well, thanks for, uh, yeah, thanks for letting us know what's, what's going on brother. Yeah, if you leave your apartment for a month or something and somebody and your, and your ex or your girl gets pregnant, that's a tough thing. That's wild. You know, if I'm real honest with you, when you talked about the build up to you guys' relationship, you said that, you know, she helped you get through addiction. She helped you with this and she kind of helped solve all your problems and you guys moved in together. It felt like to me, uh, that you were putting way too many, you was putting way too many candles on the altar of her for y'all's, uh, for your well-being. You know, like she's the reason for all of these things as opposed to you are the reason for some of them. Or you guys as union, I think, can be, there can be a catalyst for more positivity, but to put that much energy where it's like, she was the reason everything got better and I left my family to be with her. It just, um, that feels like it's a lot. It felt like a lot of pressure, which is okay, bro. I mean, I definitely, yeah, I put way, I, yeah, I had like when I was in a relationship, it would be like, this girl was almost like, you know, it'd be like a girlfriend, but also like times she was like, she was like my mother, it was just like, there was all this weird other energy that I was attaching that I didn't know it to the relationship I was in. So I was expecting like this girlfriend to be so many things. Um, and more than a human could really be because, uh, you know, you got to be, you know, you got to stand on your own business of your, of your own feelings in your heart. You got to have 10 toes on you. So yeah, I just felt like, man, I felt like you were putting a lot on that. Um, and no judgment. I'm not judging. I'm just kind of looking at it. Dude, yeah, I was like, oh, oh, I one time I stayed with a girl that I was, you know, I thought I was in love with them, but really I was just, I didn't want to be alone type shit. I also, dude, I once stayed with a girl, this is the worst thing to even admit. God, I feel horrible. I stayed with a girl that I couldn't stand. I couldn't really stand her. I loved her also, though, at the same time. And if, and that's how love works, you know, I'm saying love, I'll give you a bouquet of flowers, but it'll have a, uh, it'll have a knife in the middle of it. You know, that's just how love is. But dude, I stayed with this girl one time because I didn't want her to find a guy. I didn't want her to find a guy that would actually, uh, care about her. That's crazy, bro. That's crazy. And I feel, I didn't know at the time. That's what I was doing. And, but yeah, that's what I was like, man, I'm not breaking up with her because she might find somebody that actually cares about her. Fuck, that's crazy. Is that something too crazy to even say, Trevor? No, I mean, I think it's like the mentality. If I can't have her, no one can. Yeah. Yeah, just like desperate young shit, you know, that Romeo and, uh, Julian type shit. You know, and that's the street version of Romeo and Julie at Romeo and Julian, bro. And that's gay, too, bro. Romeo and Julian sounds hella gay. Hollywood will probably come out with it in a week. Romeo and Julian. All right. Fuck it. I forgot to even get this guy suggestion. But yeah, I think if she got, I think it's just, it's time to let it go. It's time to move on. And, and it's time to tell yourself like, uh, because it's, it's, it's tough to put the responsibility of our own feelings about ourselves onto our self. It's easy if I can be like, oh, if she's mad at me or if this is good or this is always a problem with her, then, then that keeps me from dealing with anything about me. You know, but always have a problem when I was in an early relationship. I'd always have a, I was jealous ton of jealousy. Oh, I was so jealous. So yeah, I think it's tough, Rose. Tough to look at ourselves. Because if I have somebody else, then, you know, but if I just got me, oh, how scary does that feel? That's why when I see a candle, I'm always like that bitch is brave. When I see a fire, that's just like a big orgy or whatever. That's just a big orgy. But I see a candle. I'm like, damn, that bitch is standing on business right there. So yeah, look, man. And if they're having a child or a dream in love or something, don't get in there and be raising that child or whatever, buying that little don't be buying that little whipper snapper, a little bicycle or whatever or getting them a little shiffer robe or something. Don't be doing all of that shit. Don't go down that path. I think you got to stand on your own shit and get out into your own life, bro. That's what I feel like. And also God bless, bro. Type shit. I'm gonna do a hat toss for you, bro. Shout out to 845 hat toss, bro. All right. We got a thing right here to call up. Hey, Theo. I just been listening to a couple of your podcasts a lot recently. And I'm thinking about proposing to my girlfriend, three and a almost four years. What's some advice that you would give on doing that and what something I could add in to doing it? Well, look, I think you got to add some, you have to add some something to it. You have to add some Trump because here's the thing that engaged in is kind of the first real moment of a marriage, right? And if that means something, if you put something into that, you're going to put something in everything. Maybe I don't know, shout, maybe out of my mind, what I don't know. But I saw this one the other day and this one kind of disappointed me a little bit. And this is a fellow, you can't see this, but it's a fellow in a, uh, in a small home. I believe I believe it's trailer home probably. Um, and he's asking his lady to marry her. He gets up in the living room, um, near the television. It looks like mass singer or something is on. But that's not part of the engagement story. It's just he's standing up and they got a series of, uh, a pit bull is running around beautiful animals running around. And here we go. He stands up and he's got a a ring with him. Here we go. And he's beckoning her to get off of the couch to come over and and see him. And I believe the mother-in-law or a friend is recording. Let's go. We're going to fall. Oh, you're on dance. That's it. He takes the ring. Doesn't even hug the guy walks over to the sofa. So yeah, that is just a while like he, he, he kind of gets down on his knees like, or he's standing in the living room and he's like, come over here. Come here. I mean, that's not a way to start come here. Come here. You know, like you're fucking mortal combat like, uh, and here's the greatest part. She goes, you're gonna fart like that's where, you know, and that's almost beautiful, I guess, in a way. Because it's like that if you did do a nice fart or something during the holidays, that you'd want your love when it be there for it. That's there's something very tribal about that and very, um, you know, uh, symptomatic or something. Maybe I don't know. But, but yeah, but in this instance, you can just tell it's not. So anyway, yeah, you don't want to back in your girl over to hit the need to propose and she thinks, oh, you're going to fart and you want me to get over there and be a witness to it. Now, also having someone to witness a great fart is, it's nice, but I think it's also nice. Like one of my favorite things that Shane Gellis ever told me was that, um, when he was in high school, they would sit in the pews because they were at a Catholic school and they would sit in the pews during mass. And every now and then somebody would just rip or just rip a butt wrangler off of the wooden pews and just sit and during complete silence when all your friends were in there and it would just be, I still think about, I still laugh at that sometimes when I'm walking around. So yeah, there's different degrees of handling that, but you want to do something nice. You want to do something that means something. So yeah, yeah, yeah, so just being creative, be creative, get creative, make something. And it can be, it can be silly, it can be kind of ridiculous, it could be a scavenger hunt, it could be maybe you, um, feed the ring to an animal. Maybe you guys like to hunt, right? So you, you, you hide the ring in some feed for an animal, the animal eats it. Then you guys go out hunt, um, hunt the animal, you get the animal butcher to whatever. And then she, you guys are, you make the meal, bam, is venison or something, you crack it open. And yeah, will you marry me? And then, uh, so I'm just, yeah, there's different ways to do it. But that's it. I just think make it mean something, man. And whatever that means to her as well. Like what would make her think it's nice? What would make her, what would mean something? You know, just don't let it be a far, bro. All right, let's get into another call or two. From get old, middle and Texas. We did a shot there in middle and man. Thank you for the call, Jack, onward. And, um, I don't know, I was just going to talk about, I do like sometimes, I get, I get a rush to grow up. I'm 18 years old. Uh, I graduated high school as a junior. Um, I'm already working. I don't know. Sometimes I just feel like I get in the rush, man. Like, I need to just go down, but I also need to get my life together. I don't know. I was just going to see you get you, my gang. Thanks, brother. Thanks. Sorry to cut you off. Uh, thank you for the call. Yeah. Oh, dude, I've, uh, I rushed through everything. All right. Yeah, I don't want to be in anything. I don't want to. Oh, I got to be here. I got to start. I got to do. Yeah. I got commitment to the law. I got commitment. Sometimes just to life to moments. I, you know, it's hard to slow it down enough. But I think also some of that rushes, you want to be able to control things. Well, if I can get freedom to have some money, if I get freedom to have me own place, if I can get freedom to have me own car, me own wheels, me own, uh, station wagon or whatever, me own wheel bearer, me own pressure washer, you know, me own bass boat, me own girl from me, you know, then you're controlling. You're not in anybody else's orbit. Really. You're in control of things. So some of that's kind of nice. You know, when they say discipline equals freedom as well, I mean, Jaco willink preaches that and that you get things going, you get things organized and get things cracking. I mean, even like I talk about with that investing app and stuff that I like, it's like, uh, you know, that planning ahead and that strategize and it helps. You know, if I did, it's just invest a little bit of change early. I have money now. So I think there's, there's some, there's a lot of value to that. But yeah, but yeah, oh, dude, I always want to get through this to get to that. Oh, it'll be better than. Let's just get to that. I'm always out here looking in the distance. And I'll be tripping over beautiful shit while I'm just looking at for that. Who knows what? That's a million miles away. And I don't know if it's bad or good. I think you're like, you're saying, like you said right in here, you said, let's play it. I'm already working. I don't know. Sometimes I just feel like I get in a rush. Then like, like I need to slow down, but I also need to get my life together. Yeah, slow down rush. Get, you know, get my life together. I'm just gonna see you guys. Yeah, so that's it, man. You're if you're doing fine, meditation will help you slow down for sure to give you a little bit of peace, even in moments of, uh, overwhelmingness. So that's, that might be all you need. Really sticking to some meditation, man. That way you can be going fast, but you're slow on the inside, baby. You're in control. You got a cockpit. You're not just running around with your cot type shit, boys. Praise God. That's what's up. Hey, Santa. Hey, let's say you write a letter to Santa telling him how good you've been this year. And then you hand it to your male carrier, but your male carrier is the Grinch. There's a reason why you wouldn't let the Grinch deliver holiday mail. Just like there's a reason why Morgan and Morgan is America's largest injury law firm. When you have a problem, you want experts to handle it. Morgan and Morgan has a proven track record of fighting for the people for over 35 years with over $25 billion recovered for their clients. Morgan and Morgan knows a thing or two about fighting to get you the compensation you deserve. Not all law firms are the same. Higher the wrong one and you may be beat before you even start. If you're ever injured, you can check out Morgan and Morgan and their fee is free unless they win. For more information, go to forthepeople.com slash Theo. That's F-O-R-ThePeople.com slash TH-E-O. This is a paid advertisement. Let's see if one of the call came in. Yeah, so I went, I thought it'd be a fun thing to take my wife to a raid room and we went out for dinner first and everything was good. We wasn't arguing or anything and we went in this raid room. Theo, she started beating the piss out of me and really pissed me off. I don't know why she's done it, but kind of turned me on. I wanted to swing back, but she had a bat in her hand and that didn't look too fun, but it would have been kind of hard to fight her when I was breeped up. You know, you said we went home and had a quiet ride home. As soon as we got home, I was so breeped up. I just ended up just plowing that thing. You know, like, uh-huh, like, oh yeah, 40 acres in a mule, baby. I don't even know what ball did on. Well, look, there's something. If you watch a woman beat the shit out of a damn Honda Civic or whatever and break all the windows and headlights out of that bitch with a baseball bat and you don't get a wreck. Then you some kind of little hoe. I mean shit like that turned me on, dude. Especially where I grew up, dude, every now and then you see a woman come out there angry at her husband or some guy that was having sex with her and not, uh, and not claiming her and, uh, you'd see a woman come out there and beat the book and just beat the dang, uh, headlights out of his, um, Caprice classic. Psh, God. Hell yeah. That's something. Oh, man, there's nothing wrong with getting erect if you see a woman beaten the shit out of something with a bat. I mean, that's why I love the whole movie of our league of their own. That's what the whole movie is. So there's nothing wrong with that. God, yeah. Now you're also lucky. I can't keep an erection around broken glass. Cannot do it. Dude, if my winner here's a win to shadow within probably 80 yards at thing, just punk satanee fills right into my nuts. Maybe that thing won't be out. That thing just saw its shadow dog eight more weeks of winner down. Yeah. But God, yeah, I used to love that type of shit. In our neighborhood, this lady used to make me go sit in her car with her. And she'd be all drunk drinking dacaries. Miss Carol, that was her name. She'd be drinking dacaries over there. And she would just tell me she wished I was old enough to drive. I wish you were old enough to drive. I'd let you drive me somewhere. God. I was so fucking erect. I couldn't even God, I couldn't. My fucking scoliosis was cured. I was just like, oh, God. And then she'd get out. Sometimes she had cut off pants on and she'd get out and rub her little butt like rub the bottom of her butt on the damn warm headlights of that car at that vehicle. That's back when headlight used to get warm. Then it just used to get warm. And she'd just be bending over kind of drinking that dacary and rubbing her little tail on that warm light. Wish you could drive me. Yeah. Bro, yeah. God, I couldn't even, I didn't have enough blood flow in my eyes at that moment. I just had so much erection going on. I didn't even have any blood in my eyes to keep me active. I can barely see. It's like my damn brother. He had to come over and rub some of his water in my eyes. Just so that's just, yeah, it must be a family optical disease that we got in certain moments. But God is good, brother. At least you have a wife. At least she'll are going out and doing something. Yeah, taking your wife to a raid room. That's cute. All that matters is what am I putting into the relationship? Whether I'm getting married, whether I'm doing an engagement, you know, what am I putting into this thing? Am I trying to make some moments special? Because if I don't make some moments special, it ain't going to be no special moments. That's that's the most I realize is about life. You know, sometimes they'll be like, man, nothing's nothing's exciting. Well, things just aren't exciting. They're not just going to be magic. You got to, you know, you got to be your own David Blaine sometimes or Chris Angle or Kurt Angle even. Shit, I don't care if you wear a damn leotard while you do it or a unitalred and body slams somebody. But you got to bring the magic. Except at Christmas, that's when there's just something kind of built in, you know. There's just something kind of special about it. Just that sound. Those kids coming down the stairs. You see that Christmas tree, boy. And I'd come later at night too. We all would. I think I, I bet if I asked my siblings, we all kind of did, people would wake up at a certain, you just woke up all night during Christmas time. You just sneak down. And at some point, the presents would be out to like, oh, they're high. And half the cookies would be night. I'd eat one, I'd eat two bites out of that bitch. Hell, sometimes I'd come down early and the cookies and milk hadn't been eaten yet. I'd eat, I'd drink half that bitch and eat one of them bitch. Just that my mom was like, who was he here? But yeah, you come down, you see the tree all lit up. That was one of the nicest times to kind of go back to bed then. You were just excited. It wasn't really about the gifts, it was something about the magic of it. There was free magic. Yeah, it just meant something. And that was beautiful. Those were beautiful times. That Christmas spirit. That Christmas spirit, man. There's something to it. I want to wish everybody a Merry Christmas. And I'm trying to think of anything else that needs to be said. You know, it's a special time of year. It's a special time to forgive ourselves and forgive others. Just to let go. Let go of the ways we've done it. Yeah, ask God to help us have a new year. You know, the Lord sent his son, maybe that crazy baby. Yes, yes, yes, baby. Yahweh, baby. To take away the sins of the world. So let him do it. Let him do it, baby. Lord, drive a dump truck into my heart and take away all this all this confusion, pain, uncertainty, control, anger, hatred, vitrol, and self-infliction. Take away. Just take it. Take it and recycle me, baby boy. Recycle me. Yeah, I love you guys. Thank you guys so much for letting me be a part of your year. There is some fun stuff that we're going to be doing in the new year. I'm excited. I want to add some new things to the solo episodes that are that are going to be more like regular occurring type of things. So I have some like just like light plans and strategy. We want to talk to more miracles. You know, we got a couple miracles. We had that one fellow that was doing dope, that fell off that building, and he felt 13 stories or whatever. And he passed by some of his neighbors. Remember and saw them smoking dope on their balcony when he when he when he fell pretty crazy. And then our our other fellow got hit by two trains, baby. Two trains. And God, and he survived. He had headphones on and God hit. Just whew. At day brother sometime, woo, you wish the Lord would just give you a crosswalk. Give me a crosswalk. Yeah, that was Dalton. Dalton, baby. Two trains. We got to check in with Dalton, but we need we want to add more miracles to next year. If you have experienced a miracle or someone you know in your life that has experienced a miracle that have felt the powers of the great beyond, keep them safe. And a moment that could not have happened otherwise hit the hotline 985 6649503 or you can contact the producers through the email on the theivan.com site. Yeah, that's all we got. It's been we're happy to be alive. And who knows what it looks like. This may be the last year. We're allowed to celebrate Christmas. I'm not sure what they have planned for us, but we're going to keep fighting. We're going to keep fighting. And we're excited to try to do that. And to learn as we go, travel. What are you thinking? I dig it, man. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas to you too, man. Merry Christmas to you too. I'll produce your put in this notes right here. Other producers Zach and Merry Christmas to him. Nick Andrew Baxter. Raleigh Mal. Who knocked a woman up? Gosh. That's crazy, dude. But that's how it is, bro. Like you know, I think you had sex five times in that fifth time. He made a child. Boy. Bro, you got to you got to use that syrup sparingly on me. Dang. But it is what it is. I remember when I learned about condensed milk, dude. The second I had one taste that stuff, I like dang. It's good. And then you want to use it. You want it on everything, but you can't put it on everything, Raleigh. All right. Here we go. One more call from the hotline before we in the year. And next week we'll have a best of episode. And then we may have a week off. I'm not sure. We may not. We'll see what's going on. But I love you guys. And you guys be good to yourselves. Thank you. And thank you for all just all the support. There's so many nice things that I never get to say that happen. Nice messages. People send or nice things. People brought out to shows. I mean, just all it does is like there's so many so much kindness has been extended towards me by you guys. And thank you. I love you. And I appreciate it. Here we go. Hey, Theo. My name is Jake. And what's up, Jake? Thank you for calling onward. I'm feeling a little emotional right now, but in a really good way. I'm in the military. I've been in the army for over six years now. Thank you for your service, champ. Oh, my God. And I'm currently driving home to go spend Christmas with my family for the first time in four years. And I just wanted to, you know, thank God that I'm able to do that. And I want to, you know, reach out to all my fellow soldiers who listen to your great podcast and just say, you know, if you're able to go visit your family, I'm very happy for you. And if you're not able to, if you have to spend it somewhere where you don't really want to be, you know, I know how it feels. I know a lot of other soldiers know how it feels. And, you know, it sucks, but we're here for you and stay strong. I know it sucks missing holidays, birthdays, you know, kids, birthdays, and all of that. So, you know, thank you, Theo, for what you do. You've gotten me through a lot of these years that I've spent away from my family and, you know, prayers to you and your team and prayers to all my fellow soldiers out there spending Christmas with their family or without them. Love you brother. Hey, man. Hey, man. Yeah, that's the feeling. That's the feeling. That's the candle. That's the pilot light I needed right there. When I'm pulling up to my families or I'm going to walk into my home just to be grateful that I get to be there for the positive or the negative, whatever it is for the apple pie or the uncooked dang chowder or whatever somebody made one time forgot to boil the dang things and everybody got dang disinterre whatever. Clams or whatever, right. Yeah. Yeah, that's the thing. When I'm for the good, the bad, whatever it is, that there's people that don't get it. There's kids who are going to have to spend the they have to do their holidays over Zoom with a with a loved one. There's a parent that has to do that as well. A soldier who's having to make that who's made that choice in their life. And it's a choice they made but still it's one I'm not brave enough to make or haven't been. So yeah, so to take some time to acknowledge that pray for those families and that peace. And yeah, just to know that you soldiers aren't alone that have to put that put that energy into the world. These people they're not alone. And we pray for them and their their kids grow up healthy and nurtured and taking care of that we pray for the confidence of their spouses who are at home on the front lines with their children holding things down, having to kind of be one parent. Not one parent but be do most of the hands on parenting. And we pray for those people and those soldiers at that when they get to spend time with their comrades during the holidays away from their family that they feel some sense of joy and peace and love. Yeah, so light a candle for those people this time a year. Yeah, maybe I need to every time I'm light and a candle I'm thinking it's from my own light. Why not light one for somebody else for a prayer and peace for somebody else's joy or possibility. For a moment that's not mine. Yeah, those are great things to pray for. Dude, I watched those soldiers coming home videos all the time and God. Oh God, I will just I will just start balling right into a dang bag of ruffles. And then they do the dog sometimes and sometimes Loki the dog does not know the person. I'm like, well, this is something's going on here. But yeah, sometimes at the airport you'll see somebody waiting for somebody like with flowers and a sign or something. Oh, or when the soldiers one time I was in Chicago and I think it was I don't remember the airline. But a bunch of soldiers had just gotten back. They'd all just gotten back and they were like walking all back. I mean like a hundred and they were all and it was just like this huge thing. It was like a special moment. But thank you brother. Thank you for helping us think about that. That's the that's the feeling. That's the candle. And you guys be good to yourselves. Let's get let's let's go out with some music here. And the music we've played already is from one man quartet that played Christmas miracle. And ready for Christmas was by Zoro. And then this song we're going to play right here on a way out. We wish you a Merry Christmas by Timothy in Finit. Merry Christmas to everybody. Love you guys. Glad we get to spend some time together today. Hey, you Santa. Dog I heard blitzin is a bitch. Oh, me. you You don't marry me. Prancer's a f*** it, homie.! Merry Christmas everybody, God bless you and head into a happy new year while we'll meet you there and praise God man be good to yourselves. You deserve it.