Ep 593 - Nollywood (feat. Ben Avery & Kevin Iso)

Wow, wow, Wes Chinese girl man Just leave with it just lead with it I sure he needs girlfriend This guy's a genius I heard it for three seconds. No, I can't forget I know Chinese girlfriend How sad would you be though dude? You're like a maybe 55 year old black dude and you lose your Chinese girlfriend That would kill me I just feel like more so and again you can correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel like you know if I had a Chinese girlfriend I mean I married my family probably disapproved, but If I had a Chinese girlfriend my family would be like Kind of sick. I might get a couple like a Chinese girlfriend But I feel like in a black family to have a Chinese girlfriend you'd get a mega high five correct me from wrong From the Unks from the old from men. Oh, yeah, men would they yeah, you did it right. Yeah The man would definitely Women that They don't like that do they I think all women don't like seeing their man of race date a other race women are quietly racist against They don't like interracial stuff. Oh, you think white women mine. Oh, they do. I know they do. Oh, yeah, I didn't think they care They're no they get mad. Oh, they'll tease they'll get like three glass of wine and be like sound Blanker Are you afraid she's only big you up? They get like a couple glass of white white wine And all the dad's information just trickles out I'm afraid he's gonna be too I'm gonna hit you I've been you know, I'm in an age gap interracial relationship. So I know Is it you think it's you think it's harder you think it's harder to lose your girlfriend when you older or younger You mean lose yeah, cuz you said it's pretty rough on a 55 year old dude to lose your Asian girlfriend. Yeah, man I think it's ruffle when you're younger younger. Yeah, you lose am easily when you're younger. Yeah, you got you lose Yeah, I mean pre 30 every girl's a kind of free agent Once they kind of hit 30 then they start going like all right. Let me nestle into the sitch right because you know But then but then when you're young you lose them you didn't really ever really have them even though you thought you did true when you older you lose them that that yeah, and then it's gone and that's your final form You know, it's like I've seen the flower is fully bloomed and no thank you for me. Well, you got I'm gonna take my chances dating as a 50 year old woman Which probably is no picnic if I do imagine Yeah, yeah, people say like uh, you know before you date a woman just like look at her mother. Yeah, I'm like I'm not gonna do that. I thought they're saying was fat to her mother. Oh, yeah I thought it was before you date a woman try to fat to her mother And then The night before the wedding Your bachelor But is that when you truly love your wife that you fuck your mom? You know, I baby. I love you so much I would eat your I mean, I don't like I mean that is one form I guess but that is the saying like you know if you think her mom's hot That's what her daughter's that's what her daughter's gonna look like yeah, yeah And sometimes they don't pay it out. I would like the opposite I like to have a very attractive woman with an absolutely busted mom and just sit on the edge of my seat for like 15 years Waiting for just to watch the same Just to see the transformation That's a talent. Yeah, true. It's a talent You just wait for that meatball to cook them up and you know She looks like I was at all. Sorry. It's all fucked up. That's okay. We got a little technical difficulties We have phone books maybe to where I can do this or we can't have that You got a cowboy mic. Hey, oh Oh, you got it. I'm not having my having problems because I'm tall cell either or no Now my Mike's fine. I think I have a different Mike's catches Dude thanks for doing it man Ben Avery Kevin ISO. Thank you, Matt. Thank you. Yeah, man. Thank you guys for coming Sean was telling me that you had some hot takes on the Ethiopian scandal It's you don't even got the right My dude, I know I just I'm more Ethiopian than I think Somali and small. Yeah, they all sorry. I just dude. I get a little nervous sometimes for 10 years. It's a hot button issue Yeah, the Somali and As with Cardini pitch me he goes the isotope has some takes on the I feel like they've all been said at this point. No, no But my my thing with it is I just twofold right one is like they definitely scamming But it's a matter of fact I think yeah, I mean it's it's happening But at the same time that that doesn't exclude dude from being racist about going about the way he did it talking about the dude Shirley yeah, well dude that was so I watched the video so I didn't know anything about it So I'm like all right, let's see what we have here and I read up on it first and it was like yeah for sure There's there's like better of record scams going on for sure But that dude was pulling on daycare doors right and being like where are the children? They're like bro get out of here. He's like I fucking told you this was a skit. You're legally there supposed to be locked right It's you have a kid in daycare Lock doors and you're like please don't let them see into this building. I don't want weirdo staring in I've never been allowed in a daycare You have kids you know, I mean you got to come with that right energy and be like more the fucker the kids Packer Or film in the kids Roto legal which is like you can't do that. Yeah, I don't think I really don't think you're allowed I mean you I guess you could technically film them, but you can't do anything with the footage Like even a daycare has to as a parent ask you if it's okay if they take pictures of your kids right So if I roll in with the medas and I'm like show me the fucking children Let me in now with like a 60 year old guy Who's waving documents the video is insane I watched it being like oh man They're gonna blow my socks off of the scandal and I was like this guy's out of his fucking mind You're not he's wrong. You're not allowed in again. It's like yes. There's clearly massive fraud Minnesota Yeah, he's acting like he blew the lid off. It's like bro. You're like a year and a half late right because I already caught the lady that was originally doing it. Well, dude. There was that there was also there was the autism centers That got busted and then there was that happened in autism centers It's just big a building like this imagine if we all down here like yeah, we're working on autism kids They came down. We're just doing a podcast Making like a million dollars somebody got a start count who's Oh fuck they hear three four the biggest the biggest scam and again These are just the ones who get caught There was one for 250 million dollars recently where during the during covid They were getting government funds. It was called like feed the future or something and dude these it was like I think like 60 people got arrested They were just taking money and it was unfortunately it was mostly Somali and dudes But they were taking the money and they took like 250 mill In just like food bank money and they like you know, they tracked everything it was they were saying they bought they gave money to the whatever that terrorist organization is They but they they did a deep dive. It was just sick whips and warlords and stuff they no it didn't they said it was But they like did a deep dive and it was apparently just like sick ass Lamborghini and shit But see so okay, so it's kind of tight Yeah, that's and that's that's that's what one of the dudes like messed up that because they like he got him In front of the the learning center and he was like yeah, this is uh this is an a step this is a legit business And then they went on his Instagram. He was in pictures with like lambo's and stuff is like damn. I don't know. No No, they care. I think he pulled up on the uberie Twitter like scared and dude like Yeah, we get that with But that that's my thing with okay, so you said the the feed and center or whatever and they took Oh dude, there is massive right Just massive fraud and they busted it. They like they got them. I don't care. I mean Where I personally I just don't care about people stealing my taxpayer dollars. That's a fair point I don't know where them shit is going anyway So what the fight they stealing the money that we took from you that you don't know what we do with it I'm a fair somebody's gonna steal your taxpayer dollars. I think people need to wake up to that reality If it's not that blatant, it's gonna be a bazillion non-profits who are going like we just need a hundred thousand more And they just fucking pocket it right and it's already or is going to the warship and it's like oh no where this shit is going at all Bro, y'all don't send me no kind of update after I paid his money about yo, this is what this is doing Dude the Venice real shits. I don't know the Venice well shits been like pretty open as far as wars go They're like yeah, we just took their oil. They're not even hiding it before like I rack was like we're going there Just for the oil like remember not know. Yeah, we went there for the oil and we fucking got it. Oh, they saying that now Yeah, they just said like we took we seized their oil. They went in there. They had the Venice What Maduro I guess his name was was he There were like he was a tyrant and you know, they're like we just couldn't stand that you know stand with that guy Being a tyrant and like smuggling drugs into our country. So we just stole all their we stole like a lot of their oil We're just gonna take over their oil industry. Okay. I'm glad they be in honest. That's what I'm saying I thought I thought he was lying for a little bit because they were talking about the drug situation. I mean what do they need oil for Then as well did traffic drugs we need it? They didn't put it. They didn't even ask into a boat It's a grand the thought of us country. No, that's a fair take you don't so you were seeing a lot of the stuff about like Fuck this is a bullshit and you're like yeah, I don't I don't care that they're scam. Let them scam I don't I don't know okay. Yeah, I don't care that they're scamming but also I don't care where my taxpayer dollars go if they're scamming that kind of money. I rather them scam that money then My money that I'm investing like whenever these white dudes is doing they fraud it's money that you actually gave to in Ron Like my real money. I Rather you take the money that was already about to be taken Did they you know, I mean, I don't know where it's going so You know, but They definitely they definitely there's some six-year-old white gush minnesota right now who are furious with that take You know I don't care. I don't know where his taxpayer He don't even know where his shit go. I ain't taking the money but my money. No, it's not Your money is you don't know where the fuck you money at But my other thing with the with the with the racism shit It's just like it's like it's like uh when I was used like walking the stores and like they will follow me around Like this black guy stealing and then it's like oh you falling around just racism and I was stealing I Minnesotus here remind me of it's like yes racist, but yeah, I think they went the other way I think the Minnesota government was like how dare you say that and then that they came out where it's like fuck Yeah, because they could have totally that's not a hard thing to check with like the autism centers and stuff You send out a couple people with clipboards and like how many people we got in here. All right. We're good. I think they were kind of like We trust you and they got fucking Level yeah, the problem. I mean the problem with that shit too is that they they just put in all some alliance now And it's like across the country because this is a couple of small in homies. I got out here really people are like oh They just looking at they for it They just look at they for it. Are you small? It's roughly all right I mean, that's just that's the that's the part about it that just yeah, that's things the most that's done I mean, I here's the thing though like as a like a black American Do you ever think about just like totally just ostracizing them and coming up off like dunking on them racially? No, I'm not You know, well, that's what I'm saying. Oh, you're nice. You're from Nigeria. Yeah, yeah, my I'm Nigerian by marriage. I totally get My wife's her family's Nigerian. Oh really? I've been doing Nigerian wedding. They're fucking sick. Yeah I was just that one a couple months ago beg the father of the bride. Oh, you did oh, I didn't I wanted to I asked to do it too Not you got chill, but you didn't have a Nigerian wedding. No, no, she's like you know, she's not like here like grandmother Supposedly is but you know, okay enough from Where you know we're from but this is the map of the day cares. It was 4,000 And a 20 mile radius are these the ones that are fraud it. It's not that's a lot of things The thing when I hear it's when people though Why are some red and why are some green? I'm not sure but somewhere in the middle of the water too Well, they are pirates right Makes sense I personally when everybody went up to the date when people went up to the day cares are like there's no kids In the Somalian day cars. I was like I was relieved. I was like thank god. There's no chill. It's like worst case scenario When I think like thank god there and what were you were you were you were you were you like chivalrous? I thought you're working If I'm worried they chiseled out the cement floors were mining with you When did they when did they run into these daycares to that's the that's my other thing because I saw this you know Christmas I mean here's like nobody to date. I'm like. It's the holiday So there's a really special this video is debunking it. I didn't go looking for the dead also. Here's the thing too Should I propire it? I've always loved pirates We don't love pirates true. That's fair So the video itself apparently and this I was curious too because They looked into it and it was like no these were all legit daycares because I guess whatever Minnesota State came through Minnesota if I came through or just like no these all check out and then you go okay Well, was this like a government cover up like the Democrats being like dude We can't take another political hit. It's gonna be an election year But then it's like apparently it's it's I think they were legitimately running because dude like Republican like lawyers They were the moment that video came out there was probably a bazillion lawyers like digging in and all that stuff So it really if it wasn't above board they would have I think they would have cracked it You know what I mean? Yeah, cuz they're like the you know if you get like the Republican guys they're super Motivated to like prove that there are scans. Just looks good. It's a big slam dunk you slam dunk 360 slam dunk But they already got the slam dunk The young youtuber went in for like a weird victory lap. Did you oh we're happy Tim was quit. Tim was Yes, I saw it. I saw it and he was a headshot. It was a headshot And he ate a walters like that guy went on like I ended walls What and reality is kind of meamed into existence anyway? So it doesn't really matter what's true So he had to take the out. I don't even know if it's it's real or not Have you actually found out it like the real like definitive? I looked it up There's there was a definitive scam people were prosecutor for $250 million You have to think like say you're selling drugs when that finally gets busted You don't bust them right away So it was rock they were probably rock they were running it for a while. Yeah, they were rocking They were office at sea and they rob us that land Did you see the late and they you know go ahead? No, no, no, no Get it out. Get it out. Please have the floor. Get it out. Look he wanted someone on to defend the the pirates and No, it wasn't it. I thought it was just a funny take because I didn't know anything about it And Gardini was like yeah, I don't want to talk about it I'm definitely I'm definitely passionate about it I'm off for scams. I mean we live in a bureaucracy right and like that Scams are supposed to be hidden within the bureaucratic state That's why it exists so they can do other scams. Yeah, so when other people are sc- I mean everybody's scamming Nancy Pelosi's scamming, you know We're paying for health insurance for Israelis for some reason apparently Tax dollars. Yeah, it's going everywhere. It's going everywhere, but us to our roads to our children to our so you know Go pirates Did you see witches witches of fair point by the way everybody scamming? It's just that when you when it's so obvious what the scam is yeah Yeah, yeah, everybody get a little tight. We're like, yo, you know, there's no kids in the daycare It's like yeah versus the bank fraud scam where it's hard to see you walk into the bank It looked like it's real shit. Yep, and then you pull the thing down and this I don't know pull it off a little better Yeah, and also too like you have to think if you're I mean, I don't know I don't know really much about Minnesota But you can never underestimate just like an older kind of angry like white old white guy. Yeah There were eyes on those fucking guys They had eyes on the Somalis from day one. Oh, yeah, guys go. He was on to them immediately What the fuck is it? They just they just got stared at for 10 years until a guy was like hold on a second I noticed something here come on mad. You know how he signs up seeing Fargo. I ain't seen one Somalian inside that shit What in the movie you're saying in the show all of it is Fargo with Minnesota. I think it's a Yeah, I think I think uh Minnesota is like Minnesota might have like the biggest Somalian population. Yeah, because they uh, they they let the man Sanctuary yeah, they thanks were right huh because they scared me No, they did sanctuary city Did you see the did you see the um the kid on CNN But you the kid who did the video? Yeah, yeah, did you see an interview? Well, he can't y'all y'all can't play that shit on here. I'm a Nick Sherry looks so dumb on there who surely how old is Nick Sherry like 21? Yeah, he that's the thing. He's a youngster. He's a youngster. He's kind of in over his head a little bit Yeah Through the old guy has a thousand pages of loosely for he's been tracking small He's that guy's not He's been thinking about preschools way before the scam ever happened No, the thing they didn't they didn't mention though they brought up in the video which again to the video's point like yes They had a they have a major problem with Somalian scamming in Minnesota But then there was like these just Vehicles that were like hey We can we just drive people around for medical appointments But then they were like they're not checking in again. I don't know if this guy's I heard I say that He's like, but that's that's yeah, that's in every city dude home the home care hustles like the oldest I'm sure just chill with your aunt and get 30 bucks an hour. Yeah, absolutely everywhere. That's everywhere Which again kind of chill. I honestly think the home care thing. It's kind of that's kind of nice This is a good scam And it's like a low-stakes scam for even the daycare thing It's a low-stakes thing for like if you say that you got 50 kids in a daycare, but you really got 25 who you hurting? Yeah, well those are the 25 kids. You should be in there. Yeah, they're they're printing so much money every month anyway Now it's yeah money's not real anymore. I'm kidding. Yeah. Yeah. I mean hey look at all that to fucking once you guys am again Shirley Shirley's gonna be on your fucking ass dude. He's gonna end you You're next you're on the Shirley hit list that guy. I'm skeptical of that guy's video There's clearly like fraud of some kind, but the He had a video with Joe Biden where he was holding up immigration signs and shit Who is this one? He was paying immigrants to hold up signs that said like we're for Joe Biden because he's gonna have open borders And like make Shirley cop to that that he was paying people in the video to look like what so he stages stuff in his videos But that doesn't mean it's not on that it's untrue. It just means he embellishes things. Yeah see he scamming those scammers Sheer I mean he definitely came up and again the video I watched it I gave it an honest look and I was like dude this is weird like ever I was like I was trying to look at the comments Is he of there be one person being like yeah, you're not allowed to just Arge into it. Everyone's like get him brother I think if that was my kids daycare someone was kicking in the door and they were like I'm so sorry sir Please tore the facilities. I'd be like dude I'm taking my kids out here Objectively funny leering daycare center objectively funny Objectively hilarious. Well, there's still to be fair. They're still just leering. So there's obviously there's improvement There's improvements to be made We're all lifelong students Why aren't they like the parents of the kids coming out Like if there was kids there like mad said he'd be like oh Because the kids are gonna be in the daycare with them. Yeah And also they're probably scamming too a little bit. So they're probably like dude get the fuck out of here And also how we know it wasn't a overnight daycare how we know it's not Cuz so we are in night school. How we know it's not a daycare for strippers. Yeah That is Oh, that's always sad when I see you see that in Philly sometimes you're driving through neighborhood You see the daycare hours and it's like 2 a.m. Pick up and you're like yeah They would get have like midnight pick up on daycare you how we know they don't get paid in ones True you gotta drop this the right way. It's gotta drop the crown royal sack full of ones every No, I'm not working a daycare swear. I swear. I swear. I watch kids. Are you watch kids with this? Oh, oh yeah Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I mean it look Maybe we should have a live cam in a small daycare 24 Everybody nice is a pedophile watching that being like There we go things about the change. I don't think pedophiles like smalling in kids. I I don't know you don't think just I don't I don't You don't think they like it. I think Kevin's right. I don't know I looked into Michael Queeno and Tuture Walker, Presidio McCartan. There's no Somali and Smention And any of Tim Tate's books or anything You think it's all nevermind. That's a bad comparison When it comes to satanic ritual abuse, you know, yeah, usually there's not a Somali Such a gamey You Maybe pedophiles in it. I don't know We're not Kevin. It's wanting to be mad about daycare's now Like the satanic panic and everything in the 80s and the 90s, you know, sorry I actually get that too much. Oh, no, it's fine. It's we're podcasting. Wait, so I say here's a thing though From like okay Nigerian, right? So Excellence scammers. Yeah, that's what I'm saying and they're also like Nigerians I'm a big proponent of Nigerian excellence. Yeah, it's a mathematics all that stuff As a Nigerian wouldn't you like just see a Somali and be like Or is it like more unity than that because that's like I know Ethiopians and Somali and some Ethiopians They don't like each other. I think there's a bit of everybody everybody Bees but then Like on when you outside when you off the off the continent I think there's a little bit more unity. Yeah, but on it it is a little bit of you know everybody people be with they Nigerians that hate other Nigerians. Yeah, that's very man. It's like Pennsylvania New Jersey Right, you are the worst. Yeah, he really is but Nigerian scam and I hope they don't start looking at into that shit Nick stay away They who fuckers love dude. I actually looked into um I was I was I went to a Nigerian restaurant one time and I was watching there was like the Naliwood movies I didn't know what it was I was watching like what the fuck is it? Yeah, you know about Naliwood Nigerian Nigerian Hollywood and dude I like looked into it. You can film a movie in Nigeria for like 15 grand Yeah, it's awesome. Yeah thinking about it. Yeah, you know here's like a million bucks That would be you have to see if I did a Naliwood epic it would be nice Just put myself in it like Clint Eastwood style right directed so for 15 grand you could shoot like mission impossible You're jumping at a movie in any movie. Oh, an nd. You're like a nice of really sick indie movie. Mm-hmm I would actually be hilarious sick move. Yeah, I would have a brutal schedule I was I try to be like maybe a month. I'm like, you know, I can bring my whole family watch it I'd definitely watch you not understand anything they're saying No, they're speaking English. No, they speak in English, but yeah, it's also pigeon little sometimes There's a fraction of the mix No, check it out Naliwood movies are sick. They're on YouTube for free. Oh really? Yeah, yeah full feature dude They're I watch it in the restaurant and I'm like bro, what the fuck is this movie's crazy a lot of movies have the same plot though A lot of them is like a guy who like cheats on his wife And then and then she like he like he like he like gets in an accident and comes crawling back to work Or she's like accident like I don't know like a car accident or she like puts a spell on him And then he can't fucking walk anymore and then he's like take me back. I'm sorry Don't they believe in witches and stuff? Believe in witches is crazy No, no, no, I've seen like newspapers from there And they say like a witch can touch your penis and it shrinks into nothing. Oh, that's like Is what you're talking about which craft but it's not like a belief It's more so like oh you're talking like like voodoo type shit It's like it's like I want to say it's like a belief thing, but it's more so like it's more prevalent and it's actually It's actually real for real like voodoo My wrong No, but it yes, and She's real It is real for real You go yeah, if somebody if somebody's a real it could do that shit to you and take your fucking hair and wrap it around some shit Or put some blood on you and yeah, I think that shit is real you can read about which draft in the newspapers there if you subscribe It's to any of the newspapers all right, you can read about it about the scam your way There we go Yes That's how is that really probably is I I saw I was watching one earlier and I was like skipping through and there was one It was it was exact plot you're describing where it was like a guy had been cheating on her friend Yeah, and she like there's the I was like trying to just like I wanted to watch just the climax of the movie I went to like the end and this lady put like a Hankerchief on her head gigantic sunglasses and just confronted a guy being like I know what you did He's like you cannot prove it It's literally and I only watch for like 10 seconds To say but that women love they shit The comedies yeah and the comedies were you know, I watched the comedy in the restaurant I was actually I was like kind of cry. It was like pure slapstick. It was kind of correct me. Yeah Fallen and she's like okey and papa is like Yes, I should like gonna type it in a thing you know like speak English but But uh no Nigerian scammers best best best scammers is a dude that like scanned like like like he sold an airport to somebody I swear to god. He sold an airport to some I don't I don't remember the full story I'm basically a really big parking lot He sold the airport they didn't exist That's awesome to who and I feel like it was like a government or something awesome like just some foreigner But he sold an airport Uh Nigerian dude and then Obviously hush puppy is like one of the most notorious what was hush puppies here scammers He he was just he's in jail right now. I think for like 11 years But he he was just stealing money. I don't even remember how for real really yeah a couple hundred million Yeah, I like the I like the romance If he was trying to make a documentary about it, but hush puppy sounds like a head cop rapper Like it'd be yeah, it's a jelly roll album Jelly roll feature in Hush puppy hiccup hiccup you know what hiccup and now I like it. Yeah Hiccup is like you know it's red dirt we're from the red dirt road Okay, like that real estate and their wave confederate flags my bad real estate mogul Nice hush puppy was a real estate mogul. Yeah, uh that's a great man. A hundred 24 million From an English Premier League club oh You know, I mean, that's top go big you go home. Man. Yeah You can fuck around the big daycare. Or you can just go big get a 25 million from an English. I think they only got them for like 11 years or something I feel like Betray. Yeah. I feel like if you steal 100 million bucks you can hide for sure probably 50 million and then give the rest of the God you know, I spent it all. Sorry What prints? the email scams. Dude, so apparently, so I looked into it a long time ago, those like that was like the, yeah, that apparently, apparently that wasn't even some of those weren't even from Africa. Some of those are just like a dude from Ohio, feigning the Nigerian principle, which is like 40 chess for sure. See, that's the, that's the scam right now, because everybody still think that's the scam and Nigerians is doing. We left y'all in the 90s thinking that and now we know a news. Keep thinking it. This aerial type alive. Yes, and Nigerian prince. We are white women now. The new shit is scamming the elderly. That's the new thing. That's meat, potatoes. Dude, just catfishing. You're, you're, some people go home for Thanksgiving, see their grandma and they go, I'm dating Matt Rive. Yeah, like, oh, God. I'm dating Vladimir Putin. And I send him Apple gift cards every Tuesday and we're married. And oh, God. And if you track it, it's always goes to Kuwait. They're killing the game right now. Really killing it. Yeah, I, yeah, there's a great catfishing YouTube channel and they always track these people down. I like a classic Indian rubble call. Yes. Just 40 dudes sweating and fucking call them. Hang in the phone. Yeah, that's what I like. In a warehouse that's flooded. I like when they're playing video games in the waters like up to here. You have you seen that? Where they're all playing, they're all playing like video poker and they have to swim to the next machine. Is that real? It could be a, I didn't. I made it up. Maybe. Yo, Sora is good though. Did you never know? Nah, it's getting scared. Yeah, it's getting scared. I don't even want it. They got, they got a, a, a, do, they got Matt Barnes recently. They got him like he some AI girl scan him. I like 60 grand. No, some crazy. Yeah, who's Matt Barnes again? He's a former basketball player. Oh, no, he fell for that. Yeah, bro, sad. Scanning for how much? I feel like it was like 60. Cheese. I think I still think the Shannon Sharp thing was like an intricate scam where you get lawyers who hook up with only fans ladies and they start just fucking like go, go, go film sexual encounter, threaten the tape. This episode is brought to you by prize picks. We're in the second week of January and you've probably already given up on your resolutions, but there's good news. Some of the best football games of the season are around the corner. We've got great games on the schedule this weekend and there's no better place to get a piece of the action than prize picks with team picks. There's even more to choose from. Hmm, I'd like to discuss a new feature. Want to pick winners in the race to the big game? You can now on prize picks. Hmm, that's pretty hype. So people you think will be in the race. 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Next weekend, January 16th and 17th, I will be in Houston and then I'll be at Dallas. The 23rd, I'll be in Hartford, Connecticut and then 24th will be in Albany, New York. And then we have Las Vegas coming up to 13. That's February 13th. That's a big one. Tickets are going slow because that's just how it works in Las Vegas. It's a week of town, fucking whatever. And then I'll be in Denver, Boise, Idaho, Salt Lake City and a bunch of other places go to matmacusker.com for tickets. There's actually a little thing in the underneath the episode, like it. Please. Hey, hello, everyone. January 15th, I'm going to be a helium, a Lanna and then the week after that, Sean's going to be there. Please come if you can and come to optimum noctis. January 20th. Oh, yeah. And I'm going to be a high in his fort worth. January 23rd. That's it. Thank you. Oh, I'm curious. Bro, the only fan shit is getting back. I saw something recently. It said it's easier for only fans models in other countries to get a visa to this country than it is for like movies. Like they said, the only fans models is eating up the visas. Really? Yeah. So I thought they were sex slaves. What the hell? They said they can get in with the if they make a certain amount of money. Yeah, that makes sense. The visas that they like reserve for like Arnold Schwarzenegger type people. Yeah, they give it to that makes sense. I see you're saying, you know, dude, I looked it up one time because I wanted to see like, you know, how much only fans actually makes like versus Patreon. Like Patreon, I think all the Patrons globally to what everyone's Patreon money together. I think it's like, I don't even know. I think it maybe is like 80 million dollars if that. Yeah. Oh, you know how much only fans is collectively? That's like one tenth of what Sophie Rayne makes a month. Dude, it's like 13 billion dollars a year. Only fans is 14 billion. I think porn and gaming like in gambling are the big three and comedy is like way under here. I know when it comes to my we should all start fucking each other on the show. At least and playing poker. Just a will AI what is AI? We're mocap suits. We're not actually fucking, but it just looks like we are. We're just like we're just like dry on me. What? Oh, bro. Dude, it's a Thai food. What are they going to do? That's true. Gaming the Thai foods actually kind of legendary that shows you how addictive gambling is, right? Oh, almost one. It's a snake on you. There's like Anna Konda. She trashed other. There's gators and shit. That's fucked up. Where was that again? You say Phil. That was a Phil piece. So that was a some cafe. It was an internet cafe. Okay. That's how you know, yeah. That's how you know the country's not doing well when they're like, yo, we have the internet here. Five bucks an hour. Okay, so that's gaming. I do get that dude being 12 years old and playing Xbox live. Yeah, the house could be on fire. You could have flooded my cousins basement. We weren't going anywhere. Not going anywhere, dude. I'm playing a game. I just got to a level. Why you got some. Come on now. It games not safe. I mean, that would be chill too. You never even think of it. Magic is like chilling in water and gaming. If you rage quit though, you let your cut yourself. If you slam the controller down, it kills everybody. Damn, that's fucking crazy. When I remember when I would go to the beach when I was little, the beach would flood all the time. So we meet me. My cousins are around the streets and like swim in like the street flood water. Yeah, I just realized not too long ago. So it was all sewage. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, poop and pee. I was just sitting there, dunking my head. My mom would be like, don't go in there. And I'm like, whatever. And I'd be under it. It's like, fully under a full breaststroke and poop and pee. Mommy, look at me. Just shit on your head. Huge shirt. But I was like, when I first, when I had my first kid, we were in Philly, where this playground. And like there was a, they're like a sprinkler kind of thing. With that had kept going and it like it flooded one of the little drains, like the storm drains. And then that water was kicking off from the sewage and created this other little pond. So I don't know. Kids would go to play in there. They'd be with another kid and that kid would jump in like the shit water and I'd be like, hold up. You can't play in there. It's like they're playing in there and I was like, they have bad lives, dude. You don't, like, they don't have the parents here, dude. They're gonna swim in the shit water and you're gonna stay out of that. And you know, this is where your guys is friendship, and so. Sorry. I was drunk on a couch. I was just sprinkling a shit water. Unfortunately, I'm here. So no shit water for you. Would you let them do the trampoline on the mattress that's been outside for like six months? No, no. No way. Oh, it's just sitting out. If I saw a mattress, first of all, there's a mattress outside my house. I would call the city and make room of this right now. I'm not having that. I bet guys, this is a, this is infested. Take this out immediately. No, I'm a, yeah, I don't know. I try to, even in Philly, like I remember, like if if someone would be like nodded out on our street corner, I wouldn't be mean to them, but I'd go up and take bro. You got him. But you used to know it though. Oh, yeah, I would have done. I used to walk along the side of the highway when I was a kid. Yeah. So yeah, I used to like throw golf balls at cars and like run away. Yeah, I was really bad, but no, my kids live like a completely, I mean, I'm letting them kind of roam a little bit now. Right. But no, they're like completely sheltered. You got a girl and two girls who grow. Oh, all right. Never mind. I'm sure exactly about you. No. Yeah. I got hit in the nuts recently. I was like, I think my, my daughter was trying to like wash a baby. You're like little doll out in the sink, but it was bedtime. So my, come on, it's bedtime. No, no, no, so I went to grab her and she did that shit where she gripped the edge of the sink. So I had to like fucking come on. I pulled her off. As I pull her off, she just, there's three years old. She just swung back and kicked me in the nuts. And I had her like this. Like, I have to hold her away from me so she doesn't hit me. Helled her up and I like it went through my head to just do full. Like, oh, I'm on the bed. And if she were a son, I would have spiked my son on the bed. That is gently lower. Like, ooh, your little fucker, I'll be back. I was about to bounce her off the mattress. It was like, it's like a reaction. You hit the nuts, you're like, fuck you. But I just like gently laid her down. I was like, I'll be back. The smashing machine. I would have chokes my three-year-old boy right through that shit. Yeah, instantly. I really had to stop myself. I was like, no. I just swam. And I knew it was coming, but I tried to move. And she's like grown. So she was like, whack. Fuck. Even if you did that, somebody of me might, we understand. Oh, dude. Yeah. Now, man, that was close. I almost fucking, I mean, it was a bed. She wouldn't have got my, she wouldn't have rattled her for sure. But if I'd spiked her, actually, she could have broke her arm. But I didn't. What's your pairing, Nistow? Are you, are you, are you copying what your parents who don't do or are you spreading the trend, the generational traumas that you experience as a child? I hope not. I mean, you like to think you're not your parents, but then, you know, every now and then, you go, fuck, I'm the exact same guy. Yeah. Like I'm my dad, you know? Yeah. But you like to think you're completely different, right? And they might have thought they were different. But I don't know. I feel like I was generally just fucking ignored. No one paid attention to me. And I would just wander around in the woods. Really? Yeah, and like find knives and stuff. No, I would just get lost all day. I don't, my brother told me this. I don't remember it at all. But like I, my, at the like bedtime, they would put me in a room and just latch a thing on the outside and be like, bro, see you in the morning. So they would just lock me with locks. I knew they did it to my sister. And I was always like, that's so fucked up. They did it at the Kathleen. My brother was like, dude, they did it to you too. And I was like, oh fuck. They would just go full like you're done. For your good bye for the day. Darkness now. Oh, just the creature dude. It's a roof like that. And you're in a Somalian daycare. And the windows are boarded up and the lights are off. Where the fuck was that kid? I knew him to be like, where the fuck are the kids in here? Let me see the show. Yeah, that's that was the shit. My mom too, she'd be like, like if she like my older brothers and like my cousins there, they weren't taking a nap. She would just trap them under her legs and just until they fell asleep and then they got good. Fucking put the fuck with the quads on them. That's crazy. So yeah, I do way different stuff. I didn't. So I didn't have any fun growing up. My parents were no fun. There was no fun. Everybody was miserable. We were all strangers in the house. Yeah. So I'm just trying to make it where if I can teach them to have fun, then that's a skill that they can take throughout the rest of their life and attract goodness and great things and good people. That's the plan. That feels like the ultimate. If you got fun in any situation, then you're unstoppable, right? So that's what I'm trying to do. That's true. So we like, you know, we fucking drive around really fast. And the car listening to really loud music, dance a lot. We do coke. You're drinking and driving. Just three. That is the one thing. Once you have kids and it really dawns on you, like, fuck, dude, I'm in charge of your mental wellbeing. Like I'm pulling from a poison dwell. I know. I'm just dipping this bucket into your brain. You're like, God, help me, please. Do you feel like your parents are like a lighthouse for, like, you go, that's good that that's there because I can avoid that. No, they do. That's a rocky short. My parents did a lot. I think a lot of things are going to be good. I think that's a good thing. I think that's a good thing. My parents did a lot. I think a lot of things are really good. They were just like, like, you know, now we have like the internet. We have like a thing like when you yell at your child to seven seconds, they make neural path. They there's none of that shit. They're just like, what the fuck an ass? Yeah. We all go out to dinner as a family and every by like towards the end of it, which is me, my brother's in the car by ourselves, just like chillin until everyone ate. Because if you acted up, you had to sit in the car. So you're just sitting as a bourbon by yourself. Just like, Dan, this fucking bull shit dude, I didn't get to say that. That's so funny. They took you all out to eat. Yeah, we would go to this place. Sure. Like I said, it was good stuff. It's so funny that your punishment is, son, go sit in a hot car. It was nothing. Go do what Casey Anthony does to her children at your country now. I do. I never even thought a kid could die from a hot car. Yeah, that's like a good thing. Who's to say if they can? He's a new kid. He's a weak kid. Maybe. He's just peanut allergy kids. I do dry son is every day. I'm fine. It's 1,825 minutes. I'm fine at 2,525 minutes. Yeah, there's only thing to baby just activate his heat shock protein. That is the telomeres. That is so sad dude, just to forget. Because it's like, I get it. You're just like, oh fuck, I'm gonna think about it. And you come out and it's like, damn, kids dead. Nowadays the car will lock. Car beeps. The car will lock you inside of it and catch your fire. What? You see this with the cybertruck? You see it? Yeah. So the cybertruck has a mode where it turns it to a microwave and then it locks and then everybody dies. Oh, so you don't have to go through the trouble of hooking like an exhaust thing to your car? Yeah, I guess maybe if you have a cold hot pocket. I could flame my family. Grock is like, do you have a cold hot pocket there, amigo? I mean, heat it up for you. But they will lock and then you can't get out and everybody dies. It keeps happening in the news. Nah. I like the cybertruck though. It's good. It looks like Halo. I'm a big fan. Look that up. Is that true? People get stuck with like a piece of shit. There's no way you can get locked in your car unless you're Polish. That's the old joke. You're the Polish guy I got locked in his car. What's the joke? Polish people are dumb. Yeah, it's like a little white on white racism. I don't know any Polish people. Yeah. It was a pretty cool thing. I didn't really know anything. It was like the first meme kind of is like, Pollack jokes. But it didn't really, didn't really last. How do you plan on doing your kids? You don't have kids. I don't have. How do you plan on doing your raising them up? Keeping them away from my parents. Nah. I don't know. I haven't given them much thought, man. I just definitely don't want to repeat some of the stuff. Yeah. Yeah, that was talk to me. My parents are definitely better now. Mm-hmm. They chill out majorly. Yeah, they chill out. But then you don't know if you've kind of adopted the things that your parents taught you or unintentionally taught you or downloaded the shit that they've been doing, their behavior until you're under the rest. Yeah. You know, when you stressed out and then all of a sudden, like you say, you want to spike the baby. Yeah, real bad. You should be. You should be fine. Yeah. There was two cases. Huh? There's two cases. One was in California, one in Texas, where they got in an accident and then the power went out in the cyber truck and they couldn't get out. Oh. Big microwave. Oh, fuck. Yeah. You and cars get really hot, too. And like, they're, I mean, obviously anything on fire gets super hot, but like, you're trapped, but when you're trapped inside that small of a container on fire, it's like, would you rather burn or drown? Drown. 100%. Yeah, Ted Kennedy style. Yeah. For sure. Really? Drown and burn alive, dude. Drown, you just pass out. It's like, you ever go underwater for like a little too long and you're like lightheaded? Yeah. It's almost romantic. It's more lightheaded. Really? It's chill. Burning alive is literally the worst of the worst. But what if you like sleep burning? I'm flying. Oh, wait. Oh, wait. Little slow cooking. Lowering slow for about 20 hours. Yeah, sleep. They didn't really, like, no, dude. Burning alive is like, I think the worst. I'd rather have probably my dick chopped off than burn alive. Damn. Have you ever... But do... I'm sorry, I cut you out. And... And Asia or the monks that be doing... They look pretty calm. Self-immolation? Yeah, they look pretty calm. Yeah, but they study the art of chill. That's like... Most people are not prepared to be like, how do you study chill? You're all fired. You will scream a little bit. It's so funny to be on fire and be like, I don't even care. I don't care, dude. Is that anything you think of me? Not even real. Well, they build like temples where those guys burn themselves. Because it's just like the supreme act of like, I don't know, Buddhist chill. Yeah. I've been like, I haven't jerked off in 40 years. People like, watch this shit. It's fucking light yourself on fire. Like, do this. Because it is the ultimate. Usually they do it to draw attention to something. Yeah, it's a protest. Yeah, they don't... They don't... They don't go. They caught him wrong. Recently, that was... I think it was like only sin. No, it was a girl that was going up into the temple cleaning it out. And I think, do was like... I think he was smashing. And as she tried to extort him. I was like, damn, that's crazy. There's a plot of an Nigerian film. That's not... That's a not only one movie, man. I need you to. Damn, she tried to just like trick them. She tried to extort him and get bread out of him. I think... I think it might have been a few of them that she was like going up there and... That's a bad plan. They're monks. Yeah. They're like begging alms. Yeah. They hit the alms circuit hard. Damn, I got to fucking baby vomit. But she probably knew they had it. She probably knew they had it. True. What's this? Where was this? Somewhere where ever the monks be. I don't know. They're everywhere, man. My brother, my brother was just talking to his friend who had come from like Thailand or whatever. And she was telling him that like the... The tourism... So like if you have like a kind like a gay kid, you are from this... It's like a giant like victory. What the fuck? He doesn't know what he's doing. He doesn't know what he's talking about. He's just talking about my gay. Oh, he... Oh, no. Listen to this. So if you're in Thailand, maybe it should I be offended? I don't know. Thank you so much. Here's the... If you're in Thailand, you have like a recognizably gay kid. Divers. You turn the kid into a girl ASAP and your whole family is like, here we go. Because then it's like part of that like sex tourism thing. Oh, yeah. What you do is you get a... Even if you just have like a daughter too, you can do the same thing where you're like, oh man, she pretend she doesn't have like a husband. You can be married, a whole family, or everything, kids. But then you'll go to work as like a prostitute, get like an English businessman and be like, yeah, like I'm single, bring the English businessman back to like her family and her husband will like even be there pretending to be like her brother. And they just basically... You get like, even if you don't get knocked up, they just fuck these dudes, send a letter back to England to like wherever they work being like, yo, I'm pregnant now. If you don't want like the Thailand courts coming after you for child support and like blown up your spot cause a lot of these guys are married. Give me like 10 Gs a month. And that's like apparently like a huge thing over there. So if you're out there just fucking having sex with hookers, you could get caught up in like a... That's why you get ladybikes. Here's the kicker. They got no ovaries. True. True, but then if you fall in love, that's the thing. And I saw that better. You fall in love. You fall in love. Dude, there was like, you bring you back to the village and like you just have to start like buying fucking shit for like the whole village. It's like a huge thing for a village. If you get like a slam and ladyboy, everyone's like, let's go. We're all gonna eat. It's gonna be so nice. We just need one rich British guy. We just need one old British guy. This play a whole play. This is the ladyboys. Any any could be ladies too. Oh, okay. I think ladyboys over there just popping off so hard that it's like, and that's an easy one too. Where it's like, bro, we're gonna send stuff back. Family. Who's given the prostitute they real adjures? To real. I don't know. But here's the thing, you get these old business men. They'll be like, I love you. They'll start divulging info and it's just kind of like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah. The funny thing is, especially for like the custody stuff, it's like, yo, I'm pregnant with your child, like the courts you're gonna come after you unless you send me how much money. Apparently, if you just ignore, like the Thailand courts can't do anything to you. London, they can't like, there's nothing they can do. So. Oh, you, you from experience. No, I've never been, I've never been in Thailand. Actually, when I hear people are in Thailand, there's like grown adults and kind of like, yeah, that's the, we don't know about that dude. Cause we already got their food. Yeah, we got the food here. So we got the food. That's like, what are you? We have elephants at the zoo. We have mopeds. We have mopeds. That's true. We even have lady boys here. I'm feds. We got it. We got the big four. The big four of the economy of Thailand. It's not you're going over there. There's another issue. Try to start. I was talking to someone recently who was in Asia and they're like, all my friend was supposed to meet me over wherever they were. He got his visa got messed up in Thailand. He stuck there and I was like, is that what you told you? Tail is hold is timed like that. I was going to leave my fucking visas all fucked up. See, see all these stereotypes about these countries. A man can't even go to Thailand, the Dominican Republic. DR, you get away with the DR. I think you can't go to the DR without people thinking you're doing something. You can't go by yourself. That's crazy. You got to get a girlfriend just so you can do the trip and then you break up with your girlfriend in the DR and then you go, wow, go crazy. Yeah. What is this? Oh shit, this is the Thai monks. Oh yeah. 56 hundred videos. Damn, that guy's the man. Allegedly. Who is Seeker Miskoff? I'm going to literally behind Thailand monks, Sex Black, Malice, Candle. Oh, so she ran a rank. That's what it was. I heard there's a lot of meth too and some of it. There was like a one point in a lot of those, which I'm going to call it in the monasteries or whatever. They did a drug test and there was like a couple of them were like, everyone was just strong out on meth. They're in there just partying. Yeah. I don't know, but that's what I think I wask is. You think I wask is kind of a cult? I think so. I think so too, dude, because you hear all these people being like, I've done it like 75 times. I thought it was the most powerful thing in the world. Why do you have to do it? 55. I think it's just a giant party though. Yeah, it doesn't Alan wants to say once you get the message hang up the phone. That's what I've heard. So why do you pick up the phone 75 more times? I think it's just chill. I think you go down there again. You're like a tech billionaire and you just go down there and party. I think it's just a big party. I think so too. And then people started talking about they crying on it and all the type of stuff. I used to want to do it a little bit when I was on like my little mushroom journey. And then after a while, I was just like kept listening to stories about it. I was like, what do I want to cry for? It is true. You like shit flies out of your ass and you throw up. That is awesome. It feels great. And I get what they're saying, but at the same time, I'm like, I think I can get their busself. Yeah. Without a roll of it, extrace. Yeah, I don't know, man. It's a you think it's demons or angels you're talking to on those trips. I don't know. I've heard about that stuff. You probably talking about both. You probably talking about both. It's a I mean, we all contain both, right? True. I don't know. I've heard it. I have heard of like that. You're talking to like actually, you're like interdimensional entities. And that's a weird thing with the DMT, dude. People which craft true. Which? No, I've heard that. Yeah, you're really talking to like entities. If you do DMT, there are like characters that you encounter. Because I distinctly remember I had like the gesture. It was a mean gesture who was on like a black and white checkered floor. Saw a clear as day. And then I watched this video about DMT entities. That was one of them. I was like, well, that's fucked up. Yeah. It was a real enemy. The guy was so mean to me. He. So fucking laughing my face. It's just like tease me the whole time. Like you're just fucking loser. You mean me? Yeah, just fucking bully me. I went to the actual realm and just got absolutely kicked around. He's giving you titty twisters. He was just like, you're a fucking dork. And I was like, what the fuck? I thought this was supposed to be chill. You knew us poorly in a wedgie. Literally dude. Calling you gay. It was literally, it was probably like 15 seconds of just like a, like a multi-headed gesture on a white, black and white checkered floor being like, dude, you're a fucking loser. And I was like, fuck. Damn it. Sucked. Really fucking sucked. Yeah, it's, it wasn't that per se. But if you look up, there's like a the gesture guy. Dude, it's fucking bullshit. Yeah, I'm afraid of all that. Yeah, I can't. Yeah, and honestly, too, it's like, I feel like mushrooms are great. You know, you can do mushrooms. I don't really, I don't know. You can do a lot of them. You don't have to go to like the jungle stream. Right. And dude, I swear to God, when people do it a lot, it changes the way their eyes look. Really? You see someone who does ayahuasca a lot. They get this like, like very relaxed. They're like, almost zombified. No, like, they was like Nick Reiner. Like, like the Nick Reiner. I never got a good, let me get a good look at that guy. I've never got, I've heard about him. He's been on the record. He keeps dabbing. He keeps nothing strange. Pictures with him. Maybe shit from the past. No, sort of, but there was, it was in like a black and white floor that wasn't as like lines and colors. It looked just like a dude almost. You got to pull up a picture of Will's events. Let me see something. Nobody. All right. It was a comic. Will Smith got the eyes. He did ayahuasca like a bazillion times as well. I feel like Aaron Roger got some eyes. He's got to look at the eyes. We look at the eyes and there's like, and I've known just people from like, just in my life who are like, you've done it a lot. And it's just like, they get this, I can't explain it, man. They get this kind of like, I don't know. It could just be me fucking freaking out. Nah, I mean, something's, there's something, something happened. Yeah. I'm, I'm, I'm, and dude, every time I do like a lot, any like big hallucinogenic, I'm always so fucking relieved when it's over that I go, yeah, I'm not, I'm just happy for my normal waking consciousness. Yeah. I'm gonna leave this ever again. The, the, the, the thrill of it kind of like is when you're young for real, at least for me. And then you start hearing all these stories about like, like, like the Matthew Perry situation and all that stuff and it's like, he was doing like, oxy, so I thought he was on ketamine. He got boy like a cry dad and that hot tub. He got boy. Yeah. They do him potato, they find potatoes and carrots and shed and fucking and the corn in it. Hot hot. Hot tub. He was cooking a bay leaf. Hot tub death. Hot tub death is kingly though. I'll give you that. I'd rather, okay. Now it's like drowning to death, letting on fire or dying in hot tub. I might smash down hot tub. Especially if you're dressed up like Batman and you dying on hot tub. He was dressed up like Batman. He was dressed up like Batman all the time. I mean, they didn't release it, but I like to think he put on a full, he's, he was a fat Batman and he got his hot tub and got him in the hot tub. He did. Yeah, he died on hot tub. But maybe he wasn't on ketamine. I think he had been doing like a lot of like oxy's pain pills. So maybe he did take ketamine and go on a hot tub. I could see the allure. So you might be right. Maybe he hit that and just. He hit a good life. I think, well, yeah, I think he did. Get high a lot, watch Batman. Get in the hot tub. It's a sick life. Yeah. I don't know. I'm not convinced you need the last 20 years. Not yet. Of life. 20 years total. He went off at what, 55? Yeah. Oh no. That's not bad. True. I mean, I'm definitely a strong component of getting out of here quick. Really? Which is why I think I'm a live for a long time. Yeah. I think I'm a good guy. I don't think I'm going to be here for a minute because I do not want to be. Really? You want to do a quick one? I mean, nah, I'm just saying like, you know how life expectancy is fucking guy. Tempting fate with that hoodie. Some of my come around and clocky right in the fucking head. You're asking, you're that's a suicide hoodie, dude. You can Kevin looks like he's going to live a very long time. No. No. Like at league. Life expectancy. What is it now? It's like, I mean, my grandma's still out. I don't even know how old she is. It's due to its up to high. It's super high. You're crazy. I know I'm not going to be this type of old person, but there are those old people there that are just like sitting around waiting to go. Yeah. Oh yeah. Like, dude, don't lead a room or don't lead a house and it's like, but I don't want it. Yeah. Well, that's, and that's where I think the hallucinogenics come in. Because once you're in that stage, and then I think it should be like, you have the home care worker and it's just nonstop. Just like feed me mushrooms. Let me watch Lord of the Rings till I memorize all the lines. Yeah. Take my money. I don't care. Take my money. Yes. I'll have to fake internet girlfriend. That'll be chill. And we'll have VR. So it won't be as bad for us. I can be posted up on the auto blue. Going to the machine. Auto blue, Oculus, DRT. Just hook yourself up into the code. Fuck you. I just want to see the falling rain. Yeah, just be an Oculus. I'll be an in nursing home. I'll be like seeing my family. They're like, oh, hey guys, what are you guys up to? Oh, man. Remember when we went to the fucking mountains? They would rock. You're still racist though. What do you mean? You're still, well, and whenever it gets really old, they become very racist. True. I've been in old folks homes. They are. They are. But here's the thing. It's pre-civil rights. Oh, they go nasty. But but here's the question though. Here's the question. Now we have, I would say almost for the first time ever, especially for white people, we have elder kind of like liberals, which that wasn't really a thing. I feel like. So if you watch the video of that, I keep hearing the fucking guy's name, the young YouTuber who like, surely, he stops saying his name, we ain't putting no light on the fucking end. He already did. He finished videos at 10 million, bro. I know. But. You think? You think? Yeah, man. But no, there was one. There was one. I think it was at the leering center. I swear to God where he went up. And there was just like old white lady who was like, ice, their ice, do not enter the build. And like, she started, like, she was like a car alarm. It was going off like, do not end, let these men in the building. Ice is here. So like, that lady's going to be in a nursing home one day and just be like, I think you're as cool as, you know what I mean? She'll be doing like more of the soft-handed stuff. Right. You get Jamaican lady and just be like, I love you so much. Can I touch your hair? I thought you were beautiful. I should be wiping your ass. My queen. My goddess. I'm just going to be it to be a white lady, should a wife should make it. It's like, I'm good, baby. Eat my food. I don't deserve it. Eat it all. So that could be the day. That could be, um, that could be it. I think that's going to be it. The future is looking pretty bright, actually. True. Looking good to me. I don't know. I think so. Things could be worse. Oh, for sure. We hit the lottery being born in America, right? Yep. We got a fresh, we got, dude, oil, oil's booming right now. Yep. Oil's going to be killing. I mean, everyone, look, we're a fucking empire, dude. Like, we are an empire, the end of the day. Definitely a fucking empire. We got to bust the moves. Russia's bust and fucking moves. And China's bust and moves. It's time America bust the fucking move. It's unfortunate. I wish they didn't have to do this, but we are an aging empire and it's time we. And strike out. Just dude, it was one guy. Then as well, easy. Now the rest of Latin America, I called this by the way years, not that specifically, but like Latin America, the cartels, like dude, I was like years ago, I was like, we're going to hammer down to those cartels. I feel like I can say to anything. They're all the fucking one guy in dudes first year. I feel like this, you know, this plays out the way that they want to play out by his fourth year. He about to be going crazy. Two Maduro. Trump. Oh, Trump. How many years in are we? Two. This is still? Well, you're just starting right. I feel be dead by the summer, but you think I'll be dead by the summer? Yeah, I think he's going to drop dead. Really? Yeah, like a frog on a lily pad. He's just going to drop. You think he's just going to. He's going to eat his last fly and just fall on the pond. Somebody told me he's going to try to be president of another country. I thought that was crazy. Yeah, he's old. He's he's getting there. You're starting to see the way he's like Biden was so old that you're like, dude, this guy is fucking getting around pretty good. Yeah. They're really good at creating problems to then act like they're fixing the problem. Yeah. That's what the bureaucratic state does. So like what they're going to keep doing is letting immigrants in on quote unquote accident and be like, but you get signed up for ice and help us get rid of the problem. So they're employing people with a problem. They have to create problems. Yeah, yeah. Then they go, we fixed it. It's like you fucking caused it. Yeah, that's another scam. And they did just shut ice to shot a lady in the fucking face today in a right before this. Like where are you going? I think it was in it's old to think it was like minutes. It might have been Minnesota. Where lady was just in her car and an ice agent get pointing a gun at her and she was, she didn't know what to do. And then the ice agent reached his huge gut across the grill and fired four times into her face. And then the car took off like a hundred miles an hour into a building. Oh, yeah. I read before that. And she's a US citizen, not an illegal immigrant. They killed her. Uh, yes. No, the accident actually killed her was. Oh, yeah. Well, here she dodged that shit. Here's the truth. She drove it to a building. She'd be fair. Dude, the police footage. Did they show the lady reaching it all? I have not seen the footage on the way in here. Yeah, that's it. When I said, and again, I don't know what happened. I'm not proposing to, you know, I know what happened, but that police footage when they're like, and sometimes it's obviously pretty terrible. But then there's times where it's like, like I knew someone who was in a car, they were cop and like a 12 year old just went boom, boom, boom, boom, fired into the car and they came out of the car and fucking killed the kid. Damn. Which is fucked, but it's like, do you've ever got a gunshot into your car? Like you're not like to be like, you have to like think clearly and it's like, it's kind of hard to do. Whenever I see the police stuff, I'm like, I don't know, man. Sometimes it is bad when you see it and you're like, damn, that's fucking bad. Dude, I think if I was a cop, like I'm a pussy, I would empty a full clip every day. Um, first side, I'm just emptying mags. Like on like a bird, it flies a little too quickly in front of me. I was firing at it. I'd be terrified, you know? I'd be killing dogs that are running at me. Yeah. I don't know. I mean, again, I don't know what happened. I'm not trying to say that. You got the video. Let me see. Yeah. Oh, fatally shot. Yeah. Oh, and his Minneapolis, oh man. Okay. Oh, hey, hey. Wait, I think the car takes off once she gets shot because obviously she slumped over the wheel and yikes. I didn't even see it though. I'm so fast. Well, not just in. I don't know. I don't know. Sorry. Hey, let's take some, where are we at time lies on this shot? An hour or two. Can we just cut it out? No, no, it's fine. We never, we never really could. Can you edit me out of the podcast? All right. We got some actually, this is from our premium subscribers. We got some questions, a little Q&A action. Here you go. Oh, shit. Really? This is sick. This is the new thing. Okay. I'll start it off. I got to read. I actually just kind of pissed me off. It was like, Matt, why is your wife so hot, but you just look like a fucking potato? I've never seen someone with their eyes so close together and you suck a guitar and are gay. I fucking hate you. It's from Nick. That's nice. Syracuse. Yeah, that's a perk we give to our premium subscribers. That's very nice. Yeah. I don't think my eyes are that close together, honestly, but. I mean, what do you want? So that was my question. Big O, okay. Yeah. Hey, first time Patreon subscriber and huge fan graduating from high school this year, which is something I've been really excited to accomplish. At least until my older brother died, he was riding a motorcycle on 95 with his girlfriend on the back. A tractor trailer swerved to avoid a broken down car and the back of it literally smeared them along the divider. There were hardly any remains of their bodies, so we had to cremate all the pieces together and split the ashes evenly, which is a bummer since my older brother barely likes this girl. It would have been beautiful if they had been deeply in love or whatever, but they fought all the time. My brother, and I can say this now that he's dead, hit her on several occasions. Is this so good? That's our premium subscribers. Here you come on. Okay. So that is good. Okay. But anyway, oh, wait, hold on. He cheated on him with her ex-boyfriend in the army. But anyway, I guess my question is that with my brother dead, that leaves me as an only child. I've never been an only child, and now I'm worried that I might fall into that bratty, only child personality just before college and won't be able to make any friends. Do you think I should maybe join fraternity? Did you write this? That's our premium. That's so funny. That's our premium subscribers. That's a real conundrum. I don't know what I was saying. I think you'll make it a very funny person. You don't have to answer. That's a very uncomfortable question. Do you have anything? I think there's one more. I've got a book. The producer's cherry pick these. The producer's been cherry picking these. All right. Lady Dog here. Just wanted to say thanks for all the time. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Basically like girl scissoring or whatnot. We started hooking up with it on in the background and it was pretty hot But then the video was over it was like two minutes and I just clicked the next video again two girls and continue giving my man a BJ and Things got and things were all good But then and the video a short fat black guy came All right a short fat black guy came into the picture and had I'm not lying the biggest dick I've ever seen It was like two coke cans stacked on top of each other and so anyway We start having sex and the video really did something to me and seeing those women just total just being totally filled up with this guy's Come on All right, I just want to I just want to reiterate as I'm reading this is somebody else's words This is not Saying this shit Like this shit And you know listen, I know you're reading I gotta start talking slower Look at my lips I whatever so These women are totally being filled up with this guy's massive penis and my boyfriend kept saying how wet I was glancing uneasily at the screen and so I just pulled him into me telling him to fuck me or whatever but then Or what I don't know if it was desperation or what but my boyfriend I guess trying to go along with started dirty talking to me but in like a black guy voice or whatever Saying stuff like you like this big ass black dick girl and like oh god damn this pussy slick it in the car watch parking This pussy Slicking in the car watch parking lot I Hurry up the comb girl so I can get back to doing my podcast Stuff like that And honestly, I was kind of mortified Put the video was so good that I actually came but now my boyfriend thinks he has to talk in like a black accent During and I've even noticed he's been dressing different too. Did I like accidentally turn him black which is Which if so I'm okay with that but I just don't know how to bring it up because it seems kind of weird He's Asian by the way Thank you for our premium subscribers I don't know I don't have any thoughts those questions are both a little too complicated for myself. I didn't know Yeah, you're right I Ask the producer selected I This is my perks you get I mean I wish we I had more I can't really tackle it both the two heavy you know for me to comfortably tackle Well guys again, thank you enough that was you guys are great. Thank you Matt. Thank you guys have anything you want to plug or whatever What am I doing when does this come out? Oh, I probably like tomorrow. Okay. I'm in DC over the weekend DC improv with Chris Red and Then follow me on Instagram Kevin Iso propano Yeah, I like at Ben Avery is good on a social media got a podcast with my brother J. Savry and Demacosta called lemon party patreon.com slash lemon party and I do live stream sometimes Ben Avery dot live I go live once a week If you want to sign up on my website, you'll get notified when I go live. Hell yeah, so that's it. Thank you, Matt. Appreciate you buddy Thank you cool Watch new episodes of Matt and Shane secret podcast on Spotify do it