Marriage Real Talk: Dumb Fights, Big Laughs | Sadie, Christian, 2Mama & 2Papa

What's up everybody happy Monday I hope you're having a great week it is going to get so much better after this because it's going to be quite the episode I actually have Christian co-hosting with me and we have my grandparents on the podcast two mama and two papa yeah give it up give it up for them. Not a button those are actual clapping. You know actually two mama this is the big flex on the what's going to be a podcast this year out of our top 10 episodes I think you were in three of them. Really? I think you're in the secret sauce. Okay that's great we'll see we'll see you after today. You're in the Hall of Fame. I'll be the whipped cream. Secret sauce. I'm going to have whipped cream. With sauce? Secret sauce. It's whipped cream. I like it like that. You've never seen someone use more sauce on things in two probably. That is something about you two father that you could have a whole insert your account called secret sauce and just post about the sauces you put on food. And one of them would be whipped cream. It would be it would be the same thing because like he just puts everything that's out there. It's so weird. It's so much. It's like whipped cream on cane sauce or something like that. That's so healthy good. I don't know where this conversation is going. But what we're going to talk about today is actually the dumbest fights that we've had in our marriage and actually this whole year I've been interviewing all these amazing people. And after we you know stop recording our episode I've been able to ask them this question what's the dumbest fight you got into. And we have some hilarious arguments people have gotten into from some of your favorite guests on the podcast this year that we cannot wait to show you all that we're going to be reacting to. For the first time I've seen them y'all haven't seen them and some of them are pretty epic. But first I thought it would be great to talk about with the four of us some of the dumb arguments we've gotten into. But before I get into our individual marriages one argument awkward dumb argument we all got into with the four of us is actually one of my favorite moments ever. So each year after Ella's sister conference we've tried to make it a point to take a trip with just our family. And this past year we were like your family plus us. So we did just see you're before. And then we went just as for the first couple of days. But then I was speaking at Pepperdine at the end of that trip. And you guys have friends in Malibu. And so we were like, oh that would be so fun. Y'all should come and come to Disney World with us Disneyland. And it was so fun. It was so fun that we pretty much did it again just last week we wanted to go with the California. But there was one moment where I guess let's just say for all of our listeners. Are you clear friend? This is an argument? Well it's just funny. It's just funny. Writing in the car with TuPapa is an experience of life. I really think I should preface TuPapa. You should. Okay because TuPapa is what I call an external processor. Like everything he thinks and sees must be spoken. Where I am an internal processor. Like I see things and I think things but I just don't say anything about it. So sometimes. Very nice today. Thank you, sweetie. Sometimes that can be a problem. So in this particular incident, Christian was on the receiving end of the external processing. Now you can. Well, so TuPapa was sitting. He was driving, which I don't know how. Like he was driving. No, Christian was driving. You were driving. You were in the front seat. We were in the back. And okay, this is what I remember now. We were trying to get gas, but you were not Christian. Were you not getting over in the time to have a thought you should get over? Yeah, it was like a thousand feet to merge over. So like there's a thousand feet to get over. So TuPapa kept commenting on the fact that Christian needs to get over. But you were saying it. My blinkers on the whole time. So I get a text from Christian. Say something. Like no one else knows this. I get text from Christian basically saying like he's driving me crazy. At the same time as I get a text to Mama, since TuPapa text, we don't know we're texting each other. None of us know. Saying you're driving him crazy. And TuPapa looks at us phone and says, who? Chris, who? Who are you having crazy? Just like blurt that out loud. And at that point, like a good wife, I'm trying to manage him and help him out. So I'm just like, you know, gently seeing the text. You're, you're, you're, uh, yeah, leaving alone. Yeah, we're like, stand still. I like the text out loud. Out loud. And then he's like, who? Who is, who am I bothering? And back to the external processing. And it was like Christian, Johnny. And how was like, I was dying on a few of it. So it's like, I'm going to be honest with you. I also just got a text from my teacher saying the same thing. We were all dying. That is the being of the best memory of the trip. I actually did. We're still talking about that in the earthquake. Oh, yeah. That trip was great. And external processing. Right. It's really funny. Remember. He said, he said, he yelled down the hall. That was like, it's over. It was. Don't worry about it. It's over. It's like, I'm so happy. Don't worry about it. It's over. Okay. So now that we got, you know, our wheel is spinning. Um, two more and two of a key. I think of some dumb arguments you've gotten into over the best 50 years of marriage. Well, well, I mean, there's just so many. We could never think of just one. Yeah. Here's what happened. Here's the good news about 54 years. You kind of check. Y'all be right. How many? How many years? How long have we been married? Okay. You take you got six years. So your memory is six years. Maybe as that engagement year, you know, that was that. So when you've been married 54 years, you're looking at like one filing cabinet of a marriage and like 10 stuffed with memories and things and good times and bad times and disagreements and all that. So it does get harder to remember one specific argument. So, but all of them, mostly that I would not say even argument because I don't know that we even fight over things like that anymore because then it because eventually you just give up, you know, like the clothes he wears. I mean, I should give up. There's no, you know, it's a fashion dilemma every day, but I'm just like, it's okay. You're, you're fine. Don't wear socks. Just wear a black shirt and a white t-shirt under it. You know, it's like, okay, just go ahead. Are you really not wearing socks? Never. You used to tell memo when we were dating, they matches gloves and he'd hold his hands up. So, yeah. So, you know, after a while, there's things you just, you just give up on. That's all you do. You just like shrug and move on. So that's the good news. Your future will hold a time when you just won't even remember the little silly arguments because your memory bank really is full of great memories and great things and that kind of thing. Yeah. Does that mean we don't have disagreements on the daily? Weekly? Monthly? Okay. That's still exist. And most of them involve the sex journal thinking process. Often involve the car. And often involve the car. Yeah. Trips to house. So, yeah. We're never boring. It's actually really encouraging though because I think so many couples probably, especially a lot of people listening to this podcast have not been married 54 years. They've been married six years, five years, two years, one year. They're not married yet. They're engaged. They're dreaming about marriage one day. And so it's nice to know, okay, it's okay to have disagreements. It's okay to have arguments. Even every single day and still have a great marriage. And 54 years later, we can say we're still married. We have an amazing family. And yet we argued a lot and we got on each other's nerves and we got past it and we're still each other's best friend. You guys have literally gone across the country like four times over the last month. You went to New York. You went to LA. You went to Tampa. You went to Miami. And not even like you went to New York. Then you went to Miami. Then you came back home. Then you went to LA. Then you went to Tampa. But like y'all travel the world together and y'all are going to see like comedians that you love and you're going to be with grandkids and you're going on dates and like seeing y'all's relationship is so inspiring. So it's actually really cool to hear you say sometimes you drive each other crazy, but you can still have a great marriage. So wait, wait, have you told them what your favorite saying is? It's a crazy kind of love. No, not. Let's see. Let's see. Let's see. Let's see. You say about your marriage. Oh, yeah. Let's see. I say that I have the most wonderful best marriage on earth. I just wish she did. So yeah. I mean, you say that. Which is not true. I have a great marriage. But again, part of his like external processing, he thinks that I am not having a good time because of him driving people crazy like Chris or you know, he's notorious for while we're all having a great conversation about family, deciding to give us a quote about what the what's happening over in China with the something. And I know we're like, we're not even talking about that. Is that true? But we love you for it. I told you the pastor at churches. The best thing. I do get called to Papa Jr. sometimes. But my favorite one with you is your in opportune like male delivery times. Oh, yes. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. He always has male forest. But actually, that's sweet because a lot of people say like people marry their dad, like someone like their dad. And I feel like Bella married someone like our dad like Jacob's like dad. But you are such a like father figure to me my whole life. Like you would take me on dates all the time and show up at all my games, all my sports. Like you are such a dad to me. And I feel like I'm married someone like you because Christian is a lot like you in a lot of ways. And you're one of Christian's favorite people. So even though you did low-key drive him crazy, that one car ride, he's the one that wanted you back. You weren't even trying to durs me to people. You weren't even. Well, it was also probably a combination of the kids screaming in the back. There was a lot happening. We've been in Disneyland all day. There was a lot happening. But I also have to say about two pomegranate though. He is the most like not sensitive or most humble about himself. Like you can say that. You can say you are driving Christian crazy. And he doesn't care. So I don't know if that's not good, but I really think it is good. And the long run it's really good because he's open to conversations about improving. He's not necessarily going to do that, but he's open to it because he'll forget it. But he's he's good about that. Like I think that's what's great in any marriage that you can be humble about your mistakes. What you've done wrong. And you know. I remember whenever we started low and I had all the what ifs, what if I failed, what if it isn't where I need to be. And looking back, I can see so clearly that God had his hand in the whole thing. Starting something new is exciting, but it's also very scary. And that's why I'm thankful for Shopify. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e-commerce in the US from massive brands to tiny startups. 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There is a book, but I didn't read the book, but I did the Bible study version of it on the Bible app. And it was called unafendable, like being unafendable. And it was really, really good. And I think that you're like that. And that's actually really good in marriage, especially when it comes to like little arguments. Because that's how they don't become big ones. It's if you just let them roll off and I even like laugh it off. I just know who you are. Be unaffendable. Krishna, we're trying to think of the dumbest arguments we've had. And what's actually cool is even just six years, which is not a lot of amount of time, we couldn't even hardly think of one because even though we know we do have dumb arguments a lot, like we couldn't pinpoint like, oh, when that happened or that happened because when you look back, even like this past month, I'm like, you start to not remember those little things, you know, because they're just not that big of a deal. And you I feel like in just six years, we're not as bothered by things as we used to. Like for instance, there was this part of the closet that Christian had all of his clothes and that he had not unboxed these clothes that this company said. You told me this last night. I know. But I was like, you know what? I was like, you know what, though, I didn't let it really bother me. And this is good because Christian got this company sent him all these clothes. And they've been sitting in our closet forever in the same spot. And like, hey, it'd be great if you kind of like go through those clothes. Well, yeah, I got through the clothes I got there close. And then he also has like a million hats. And I'm like, hey, like you should go through those hats because they're taking up our entire counter space. And also he continues to buy new hats. So I'm like, you gotta go through the hats. These hats get sent to them. In the meantime, you do buy a lot of hats. In the meantime, I cleaned out all of my style of the closet. I'm also cleaning out all the girls closet. So I'm like, okay, you can do this one for you. You are good at that side of your life. I do try. She was doing all of them. She was doing all that in spite of me not cleaning. Oh, she's no, I really wasn't. Yeah, I was gonna say no, wasn't. I just sort of myself to be clear. Yeah, you're good about that. And so it was just funny because last night, I think it had a dumb argument. And I was like, you know, it's funny. As I was like, I actually have asked you like at least 10 times to clean this closet and the hats, but I haven't been annoyed by it. Like, I'm not frustrated by you. It hasn't called us to fight. It's just something that I can turn up fighting with. You're not throwing hats at him. You're not bad. It's not like a huge deal. It's just like, Hey, I'd love for you to do that at some point. And I was like, I think that that that's just a small thing of growth in our marriage in just six years by not being like, you know, in your first year, so sensitive to things where it's like, you don't listen to me. I've asked you so many times. Like, none of that. It's just like, Hey, for real, boy, get your hats out of the way. I'm really not a messy person. It just when it gets to the point of like, oh, being you get overwhelmed. It's like, it's like a big time. I don't know where I would start with my hundred. Yeah. Well, we're like that with two poppies table that sits beside his chair in our bedroom. Like our bedroom is like the biggest mess ever all the time because his pile is just like an entire area. Yes, like, he just keeps stacking things on. He's like, saying, I'm going to read that. I'm going to read that. Like, when are you going to read 50 things that are stacked up there? And he says, when he liked, he says eventually, yeah, like when he totally retires, which I don't ever see that happen. You're ever going to have to think you later. The other arguments that we could think of though, all were in COVID days, which is funny. I think because we were like quarantine. Well, we had long distancing dating and engagement to quarantine marriage. Yeah, that will call us in the Mariamites. What were the ones that we thought of? The COVID that driving the Florida. Oh, this is funny. Yeah, we did get a ready to do this. This was you being sensitive. Yeah. This is bad. This is not have happened now. So during COVID, crazy days, do you want to tell the story? Yeah. So it's like, hide of COVID crazy times. So we're driving to Florida because you can't. This was at the point where you know, where air like the airport were still shut down and everything. So we were driving to go visit my family for something. It was over the summer. We had no kids yet. It was just the two of us. And we were driving to Florida. We get to like the the state line of Alabama and Florida. So to kind of go into Florida, kind of near Pensacola, that area right there. And you come up to this checkpoint. So like the interstates like shut down. This is important. And this is so crazy to think about. But at the time, no one from the state of Louisiana or the state of New York could enter Florida because Louisiana and New York were such big COVID. No, we did know that. But we were like, yeah, I remember that. Yeah, because they were saying it was cause a lot of growth. Yeah, because Marty. It was at the beginning of like we're on driving interstates. Like how do you? Yeah. So we were like, they're not going to know like your family's there. We're just going to go. You know, it's fine. Yeah. Well, so the interstate, it's like block. It's like blockaded. It's like you can't take barricaded. You can't keep going. They're like, I was so scared. You get merged over to like one of the, you know, one of those roadside, one of those roadside checkpoint things. Yeah. And there's like 30 cop cars. So you have to like, they have these like individual like stations interrogated. They have these like individual like station tents set up and you don't have to get out or anything. You just kind of pull it through and this person, you like roll out into one of this person's like super and it's super, this person's like super intense. Thankfully, we were in your car, which still had your Florida license plate. Yes. And the whole time we're leading up to it, I'm saying to Christian, you cannot lie. You cannot lie. If they ask us like, if we've been Louisiana, like, like we just have to tell them, but this, but this is still time when people were like crazy. It was like, yeah. Yeah. You get locked up in a hotel for two weeks. And we were seeing that. We remember we just saw Craig, Craig, Michelle had been locked in that hotel for two weeks. Like crazy stuff. Yeah. This is so crazy. We pulled through this thing and I'm in my truck. I said on my Florida license plate in the cop. So Sadia has this whole mantra. We're going to say, we're going to see your families from here. We've driven seven hours. We can't turn around. Well, I gave the. But in my mind, I'm thinking, what if we pull in and they're like, come to the holiday and with us for two weeks? You know, I'm like, we're not doing this. So I pull in. And it's funny. The whole time Christian was just telling me, okay, like he never told me. Oh, yeah. I was just like, yeah. I'm like, okay, you're just going to tell me where they're feeling. He's like, listening to me. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. So we pull in. And the officers like, no, it's this person's like intense. Have you been to Louisiana, New York, or some of the rents? Would you be been to New York somewhere else in Louisiana? And Christian goes, no. And I was like, thank you. Christian's like, I say yourself. Sadie was so. And I was like, you lied. He was like, I had to. I was like, either we're driving seven hours back to Louisiana or at the Hampton Inn. I'm like, 30 minutes. He goes, you want to turn around? You would have been in the hampton. I told you not to lie. I was like, yeah. Who would we be? Because you were like, you know, in Christians, like, well, we were in a war. You would sometimes have to lie to save yourself. And I was like, I don't know if I could do it. That was crazy. I don't condone lying. Because it is a sin. But I'm funny as part, though, which is like the build up. And I just was like, and you were just going along with it. Like, yes, it's exactly what I'm doing. He's like, have you been in the New York, Louisiana? The past two weeks. You know, I'm like, the Lord forgave you. He did forgive us. And we got to go be in Florida. We had a good time with my family. We did have a good time. That's like a very memorable trip because I remember just the beginning stages of COVID, like any door we opened, we could like, you're a man. So where do they think you all were coming from? Well, thankfully he had that Florida life. He would be a... He'd filter the bill. Okay. So that would be just... We could have been in Alabama. Okay. Yeah. That makes sense. Oh, man. That would have had the holiday in for two weeks if he asked me the questions. That's... Or you would have been seven hours, but... Of course. I think Christian said something though that kind of speaks to remembering things as you said, it was just YouTube. So that... Of course, you can remember that. Now you have three kids that layer everything else. So like your brain can't... Like now we have three kids, three in-law kids, 14 grandkids, 10 great grandkids. Like we've got a lot of other people who can annoy us. It doesn't have to just be healed. You know what I mean? And we can also use each other as like, okay, you're my sounding board for if I'm annoyed. That is sister or Adam, brother or you know, or somebody else in the family, you know. So you kind of then formed this camaraderie you know, we're a team. So I think that's... I'm giving you all some more advice for 54 years. That's actually so true because all of our memories of annoying each other was when we were... Before we had kids. It's a show. Yeah. And then actually we've been saying that we feel like more like a team than ever because you are a team and because we're dealing with the freshers as we have with a two-year-old or we like, you know, all the parenting and all things. Which is way harder actually than saying no to a, you know, when you're dealing with a sick child or a disobedient child or something that just is so hard. That's so hard. And then the other things just take a backseat in your memory banks because it's just not really that important. No, because that's the thing like the the big arguments stand out because they were a big deal. Right. I know it was like, oh, we were arguing over how we're going to parent the situation or what we're going to do or all of those things. But like the funny ones and just throughout the day with the dumb little ones, you didn't put your hats up or you didn't, it doesn't really matter. So you can hardly even remember it. Yeah. But then thinking back to our marriage, those were like silly, but the time that was our big deal. That was a big deal. You know, it's a, it's a funny. Okay, friends, one of my favorite childhood memories around Christmas was actually packing Operation Christmas Child shoe boxes. We did it at our school every year. And there was just something magical about, you know, packing the toys to crayons and stickers and knowing that it's going to a kid around the world who needs a little extra love. 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And it meant so much to him that he still has a yo-yo that he got as a kid in the shoe box because it was such a big deal to him to get a toy like that that he still has it. He's an adult now with two children and it means a lot to him. So I've just seen how far these little gifts can really go and the impact it can make by your love and your commitment to send something. So visit Samaritan'sPurse.org slash OCC to learn how to pack a shoe box or build one online that Samaritan's purse.org slash OCC. Yeah, most of our arguments are usually pretty pretty pretty good ones. They're not like, oh, it's kind of stupid. It's like a for real. Some validity there. That's true. We're in the deep end now. It's not staying, but this one I was like, that was probably a demo. I was like, actually, no, that was actually probably, that was probably a big one. Yeah. Or I was staying in the communion one. Remember we were digging a communion together? That's just like the funniest thing ever. It was so not funny at the time, but it is funny to think back on. That was like the hardest thing we have been through. Yeah, we walked through a really difficult time and then we both came together really, let's do, let's take communion. So we're taking communion. We tried to take it. We were in the process of taking communion. And then I think I said, I was like, let me just, I need to flush out one more thought. And then that blew up. Remember the new slam, I'm going on a walk. And it was like, there are the main wall of the community. I'm just sitting there. I do so. This was, yeah, I was just sitting on the table just looking at the, just the grape using the bread and I was just a little moonlight mad. I'm the little moonlight walk. I know. It's just actually just, I am giving people that advice for taking communion because hey, it'll bring you to Jesus. So bring you together. In my, my had to confess or repent throughout the process, but that is the funny way to think back on. That's funny. So we have a lot of different ones that I would love to show from this year. The first one is from Alina Franklin. They had just got married. I don't even know that they've been married for a year. And so let's see what her downward humid is. Like I assumed that he would take care of all the car things. I didn't say that. That was so real. So his face, I just was like, you're stepping into this. Yes. And I needed an oil change and I just was like, I need an oil change. And like a few days went by and I still hadn't gotten an oil change. And I was such a brat. I don't even remember how it happened. But eventually like I just was like, you have not gotten me an oil change. And I just started crying. He's like, what in the world? I storm out. This is probably like two months in the marriage. It was probably our worst and also dumbest fight ever because it was like, Hey, and that's your worst. You're doing great. But PSA's a guy out there. It is in a sense. It's your job. I mean, sorry. It's not your job if you don't want if your wife doesn't need you. But I feel like it's a job. Expectation most women are going into marriage. And so you might just want to get the oil change. I was the same way. I'd be like, yeah, like my oil like he's going off like, he he like, he can do that. And then even like whenever we have like the inspection stickers here and like, oh, that's like expired, you know, like just kind of noting it. And so funny. And Christian also like I he gets annoyed when he gets in my car and like, I'm on low gas. And what he doesn't know is like, no, that's actually intentional like because I was waiting to be with you. Do you do that? You can put me gas. And he's always like, how are you always on low gas and then that's intentional. I think you're not low gas. You're like, you're on the same three miles. Yeah. Oh, what you don't know. Also, I love how I love the beginning of that when she was talking about that. You were like, yes, yes, as if I don't do everything for you. No, no, listen, listen, that this is going to spark a dumb argument about all my commentary in these videos because I wasn't growing with the people. I was like, yes, but listen, expectation without communication, results in frustration. Yes. And a lot of girls go into marriage expecting there has been all these things, but they never communicated and then people are getting frustrated out there. You just got to express your desire. And I think again, it's that what your dad did and my dad, and I do remember doing this in our first six months of marriage with him saying something about, I'm not your dad, you know, because daddy was the get the gas from mom, do all the things, you know. He came home from work. He went right in the kitchen, helped her. We had six kids. He'd get the vacuum out. He did all the things. This was not this man. Well, that's my question. 53 years. I can't remember when did it just seems like you always took care of your own stuff. You always change your own oil. You always got your own gas. Yeah. How did that come about? I don't know. Which is pretty because I feel like you did a lot of stuff for me. Like you. That's a big thing. It's like the license. The license you always hope you do that. All that stuff he's always taking. And like now I've got a low tire at this very moment. And I'm like, keep saying I've got a low tire. I take care of the low tire. And he takes care of the low tire. That's so funny. You actually do always take care of all my car stuff. And you do pump my gas. And I'm so appreciative. Well, the sweet thing about you is I usually notice. I usually notice what wrongs your car before you do. Yeah, you do. So I'll get in the car and be like, hey, you're, you're, you have a low, and you know, you'd be like, oh, you didn't know that. Yeah, that's true. It's like the lights like. For some reason, no one decided to tell me to the night when you and honey and haven drove my car the next day I got in it. And I was like, gagging. And like, rolling on the most of us, I can't, I caught Christian. Did John notice a smell in here last night? And Christian was like, oh, yeah. Honey said it smelled like Cheetos. And I'm like, and no one looked for where that was coming from. We just let that be one more night, one more day's worth. It's horrible here. That would be, like, Johnny's would notice the gas low, but not notice to take out the McDonald's act that smells so bad. Yeah. Oh, that's bad. OK, this one is from Brandon, Nick. So I'm just going to tell you all, this is the craziest one I've ever heard. So without further ado. And if I agreed with this, I was just being against this trend. So we were freshly married. And we drove, we were living in a part, we were still in apartments, but we were driving into our apartment complex. And he got out of the car first. And I was sitting in the passenger seat, and there's this girl that walked by. And I thought he said, wow, you have a really pretty dog. I thought he said, well, you're really pretty or something like that, like to her, but come to find out later after all the chaos. I'm about to tell you happened. He was saying you had a really pretty dog. You know, oh, my goodness. I didn't see the dog. He was a tiny little, he cut something. And I'm so hilarious. I remember like I got in the car. And I just said that I gave him a silent dream, like whatever I'm not coming inside. So he went upstairs and I'm still sitting in the car. And I'm pounding and I'm like, I cannot believe he said that. Is he kidding me right now? You think he can just go out and compliment, you know, a girl and I'm sitting right like, what is he doing? So I like, I came upstairs, I gave him a silent treatment. He jumped in the shower. And this is going to sound like I'm crazy. I mean, I kind of am crazy, but like I thought I grabbed like paprika or something. I don't know. Like I don't remember what season he and I thought it was. But I ran into the shower and like put cold water on his head. And then poured paprika, but it was actually chili powder. It was cayenne pepper is what it actually was. And he's like, this is birdie by eyes. He's like, what is wrong with you? Are you crazy? And it's like such a horror story. You literally like wrapped up in the shower and fell to the ground. I'm like, you called that girl pretty. Like, what is wrong with you? He's like, what are you talking about? I'm like, there's a girl that you called a pretty. And he's like, no, the dog was pretty. And so I'm so embarrassed even sharing that. But that's like one of our good. I think to go grab the. I don't know. Like why was it? What was I thinking, right? Like I wanted to turn him orange, you know, like whatever. Because we're very jokered. I've been our family. That is hilarious. But like every time we tell that story, I get immediately so embarrassed. Because I'm like, what was wrong with me? That is so funny. They come to find out the lady. This is even more embarrassing. The lady that he was talking to is actually our downstairs neighbor. No. And I have to see her all the time. That is so embarrassing. So every time you live here, you're like, you're really pretty. And your dog is too. Yeah. I pregnant laugh. They're still married. I miss your pregnant stuff. I mean too. I pregnant laugh is so much funnier. Yes, they're still married. They're still married. They're still married. Yes. I was like, how did you even think to go to the spice cabinet? Yeah. I would never even thought of that. She was like, I wanted to turn him orange. That was an intrusive thought unlocked. She just said, full sin that that is hilarious. That is that's that's next level. I've never done something like that to you. You have not. Thank God. No, we never did. No, that was pretty funny. That is one of those things that it would be a huge argument if he actually did color pretty. But it ends up being a dumb argument because it was the dog. Yeah. Yeah. But it's just funny. That is just hilarious. Another day, Christian was making a joke. Someone like my, our friend showed us this picture of this girl and Christian said, dad gum. And I said, Christian, you can't be saying dad gum to another woman. He was quoting something that we had both seen. And then after I said that, his parents... But it wasn't even to the... At 10 minute speech, I'm like, how we can't be jealous of other people. We can't appreciate that. The dad gum was not to the person. The dad gum was not to the person. I was kidding. I was not really mad about the dad gum. I thought it was funny. I'm staying at the listeners. Yeah. You weren't actually saying... No, I'm saying to the listeners. That was not thinking. I actually said dad gum. No, but it was just funny because it was followed by us getting this speech on not being jealous and marriage and being confident that we want each other. But I was like, I do what? I know you want me. That was just joking. And he can appreciate somebody else being a trot. That's okay. You can't acknowledge that. That's a generational thing that is interesting. Because I don't know if it's generational or if it's just 30 years of marriage for his parents, 50 years of marriage for y'all in six years. Like, okay, y'all will say, oh, it doesn't matter. You can say someone's attractive and it's fine. But it seems like such a big deal for young people to hear their, you know, a spouse say someone's attractive, even if they just are attractive. Like, I feel like it automatically causes arguments. In that case, that actually was kidding. But I'm interested to hear your thought on that because I think that's actually pretty universal. This is off the cuff, but you were not planning on talking about that? No, I just want to tell you something. No, I know I'm just saying. I'm sorry. Yeah, well, I mean, I think for us, I've never been a jealousy thing like that. I mean, he's free to say she is so pretty. And like yesterday, in fact, we were at the hub. Was it the hub? No, where were we? Over the years. No, we weren't at the hub. I don't know where we were. But some guy, I'll be right at the ball game at Joseph's ball game. Some guy walked by with this really great hair. And he said, he said, I really would like that, would love to have that hair hair. I want that hair. He said, and I said, you had that hair, but it's 50 years ago. I would rather you have that stomach he has. And he just laughed about it because, you know, that's, well, that's it. Like, a big deal. And they're intrigued. Because we know we want each other. And it was, it was a funny thing. Because Chandler had just spilled K-so on his shirt. And she was like, I want the guy with K-so on his shirt, even if that guy is attractive. Which like, I guess young people, you know that, but you're so sensitive to like, still. Yeah, I don't know. But you're young and you just got married. I don't even feel like now, I really was not bothered by that. And even if he did say she was pretty, that's so different. And like, when we were dating, I would have been sensitive to that. And that was something I had to work on with, jealous of you. Well, you're so gaining. You're so gaining. You're gaining confidence in your relationships. Yes. You know, totally. So that's an interesting topic conversation. Nothing ruins a night faster than waking up sweaty or shivering at 2 a.m. I used to toss and turn constantly until we found Miracle Made. These sheets are NASA-inspired, sober and fierce fabrics that help regulate your body temp, so that you can finally stay cozy at the perfect temperature on it long. 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And with a 30-day money-back guarantee, there's absolutely no risk. That's trymiracle.com slash woe with the code, whoa, check out. Thanks to Miracle Made for sponsoring this episode. Okay, next we have Chidama and Mel, which was actually one of y'all's favorite top 10 podcasts of the year as well. We had a little girl chat and talked about meeting husbands and it was really cute. So here's their arguments. This is actually so crazy of me, like this this reflex point. It normally falls on our crazy ass. I'm going to die, oh yeah. I'm super particular just in general, but I'm very particular about the dishes. Like that's, if we're going to get into a fight, it's probably going to be about the dishes. And when we were getting married, we got a new set of like pyrricks, just pyrrxes, you know. Yeah. Temporary. That's what it was. And so we, so the old ones that I had, I was like, okay, Michael, basically the old ones are yours. Like if you want to take them to work, take them to work because he'll take it to work and then not bring it back. So I'm like, just to avoid any argument, any fight, you take the old ones, the new ones from our registry are just for, I got home, like for food prep or meal prep, things like that. And so that was, that's always been our agreement. And I was out of town once and these things tend to happen when I'm out of town. But I'm out of town and I notice, because I count them how many things, again, crazy. Super crazy. But I count how many are there of the new ones. And one of them was missing. And so I was like, hey, did you take one of the pyrrxes to work? And he was like, oh yeah, I did. I wasn't thinking about it. I did it at whatever. I was like, okay, where is it? He was like, oh, it's in the car. I'll go grab it, right? He goes to grab it. There was food. I can't even, because I'm getting mad again. There was food all in it, but it was like, spigot, like meat sauce, like red meat sauce. So you know how that gets stuck in it's gray. Oh, that's crazy. I crashed out. I literally was like, we've talked about this. I'm not a yellow, so I didn't know. But just like, very calmly, I was like, we talked about this. And now the red sauce is stuck in the lid. And so that's super dumb. Like I'm talking about it now. Super dumb does not matter. We can buy more. At the time, it's like a really big deal. Oh my gosh, I did not talk to him for the rest of the night. Like, is it so funny? You're saying so dumb. Right. It's like silly, but in the tone, it's like, the red sauce is stuck to the stick. And it's like, really? Yeah. Red sauce being stuck to it, but it matters. But it matters. It gets perso, because you're in a toilet. I asked you, that was my whole thing. I was like, I asked you basically, specifically not to do this. And you did, and he was like, and then it turned into a bigger fight, because he was like, well, it's not a big deal. Like why can't you see something? Now we're getting deep. But he was like, oh, this is so real. You see something and just give me grace. I was like, well, I specifically asked you, it feels like you're disrespecting me and not doing what I'm asking. And so then it became this bigger fight. It's a dumb argument. There's a root to it. It's always a root to it. Why bother you so much? Right. Right. And it's not necessarily the other person's fault. No, it's not. That's so true. And you know what? It's so funny. How many people have brought the dishes? That is a thing. It's crazy. I know. I think me and Christian are the opposite. Like Christian is you and I'm the fight. Really? Because I don't, yeah, he's more particular. And so he always does the dishes because he knows if I did it, it would annoy him. Right. He wants to do it in a specific way. Yeah, because I think no dishes for you. I hate you like that. So I'm doing the dishes. I'm fine with that. And then if I do it, it'll be like the way he says something to me though sometimes where it's like, and I'm like, I know how to do the dishes. Right. You think I'm not capable in the, yeah? He says that all the time. Michael says that all the time. Yes. So real. Yeah. So real. Yeah. There's always the way he does the dishes, right? And that is the reason. And you just pile it all in there. Yeah. That's the reason. Yeah. Well, I should have been fine. Right. That's so right. How do I got this? Now, have you thought of Y'all's dumb argument? I don't know. Like, we have not any like blow up arguments, but all of mine, all of ours are about my particularities. Like, too, like, and that kind of thing. Like, there was one time where he wanted to bake something and it was like, erosed like, and something in a pan. And we had some, I had some brand new pans for like the whole month. He pulled out the brand new. I was like, hey, why don't we use an old one for that? And he was like, why can't I use the, you know, like that? But I think like the trash is honestly the like thing and he accused me like, so I have this thing with trash that I don't want it to smell. Like, so if we have food trash, I'm like, hey, can we like put like a smaller trash bag in like and hang it here and put all food trash in there so that we can take the smaller trash bag out immediately. Immediately. Immediately. I can't. Like, no, I get that. Take the smaller trash bag out immediately. And then we don't like waste large trash bags because you know, like all, you know, like all that thing, that kind of thing. And like, it's just the hardest thing for him to like remember. And so I kind of like, a may have like, you know, said something that might have thought him think like, I was like, this is just common sense. Babe. Oh, yeah. And see, I'm always only receiving that. Yeah. Exactly. So evidently, you know, that wasn't the most kind thing to say which I do agree. Yeah. It was like, it is. I know what we get to you. Yes. So the Christian would be like, yes, that is so true. That is hilarious. I really, I really was honest that whole time. Yeah. You were, that is true. Now, those were good. Those were good because I think if you're going to be really particular about something and hang on to it, you're going to have some arguments. Yeah. You have to figure out how far you can take that particular thing that you love. Yeah. You know, like if you, like she loves those pyrux dishes, like how far are you willing to take that because you will have an argument about that particular thing? It's true. There's things that both sides just have to give up. And that's the thing what I was saying with the closet scenario is that it didn't turn into that. Like it didn't turn into, you don't listen to me. I've asked you so many times. Like I wasn't offended because I knew it wasn't personal. Like it didn't have to do with him, like not trying to value what I say or respect what I've asked. I know, Christian, and I know that's overwhelmed me. It's like so many hats. This is at the point where he is really going to have to sit down and think about which has he wants to tie. So what is he going to give me? Well, I always keep. And because I had just done it with the closet, it does take a lot of time. So it's like just not taking things personal. That is really the key to a successful marriage is not taking really very few things personal. And going down that line of thinking that they don't love me, they do this because they don't love me. Are they do this because they're not attracted to me or they don't do this because? And really, most of the time, they don't have a reason for why they're doing whatever they're doing. It's not what they do. And it's not the thing that we're, yes, ladies, women are thinking that they're thinking. It's not that at all. They just aren't thinking or vice versa. That's why you're right. You just not thinking, you know. It's true. I love that. That's so true. All right. Next we have Dawn Sharie. OK, so I think probably our first year of marriage, one of the dumbest fights we've ever had. I can say it's dumb now. It was not dumb to me. It's always, yeah, it never fills up way in the mud. And it's normally the first year. It was rich continually leaving his beard trimmings in the sink. Oh, that is annoying. It created quite the fight. And rich probably thought it was dumb from day one, but it wasn't dumb for me that very soon. We got in fast. Your toothbrush is there. Oh, so thank you. We're on the same team. No, we still have this conversation because I let my toothbrushes there. Exactly. You have your own sink. No, we're on vacation. That when we're traveling in the works, we're still working on it. We're still working on it. We're so good. That is so funny. That is perfect. No, for real. When we're traveling and you shave your beard, you have my toothbrushes right there about all the little hairs that is actually. I'm growing it out now. You don't have to worry about it. I'm so thankful. Again, moving along, we had Jess Connelly. Well, the dumbest argument that I ever got and was the night I got married. No. The night of our wedding. And it was because I made the mistake that most bridesmaid and that I did not eat at my wedding. And I was hungry and I was starving. And we went back to our hotel and we had a wonderful night. And then it was one o'clock in the morning. And I was so hungry. And I remember just begging my husband to go get me food. And he was like, well, it's the middle of the night. Like I don't know where to get you food. And I just cried. And I was a very hungry, 20-year-old food. And you're like, you didn't her mommy. You just be by her mommy. Literally. And I remember I just yelled and screamed and I went to bed crying my little eyes out. Oh my gosh, that's so real though. Because I can relate, but it's like during pregnancy because one time I got great grandpa. So my great grandma was telling me to sort about my great grandpa how she craved tacos during her pregnancy. And like at midnight, he went to fast food. Like Goddard like tacos brought it back to her because he knew she wanted them. Wow. So I threw out one time like, hey babe, like you know what, someone's really good right now. Like a breakfast toaster from Sonic. And guess what he didn't do? Yeah. Get out of bed. Yeah, get me the breakfast to the last 20 years now. My husband will go get the food. Because he is like never again. I'm not doing that again. First night was the worst. First night was the worst. No, remember I actually did say that. I was like, oh, you know what's in Suga's? Like a breakfast toaster from Sonic. You were being. And then you were like, yeah, I know. And then I said it a couple more times. And then what did I do? I got my own butt up and I went into the kitchen and I got myself out towards Diaz. Cheese, eggs, and bacon. I made it a whole made one. And you came in and you said, are you really doing this right now? I don't remember this. Is that what a breakfast toaster. That would never happen with us. Because if I mention food, it's in the car. That's never going to be all. That's never a problem. That is so good with us. I won't ever be hungry. And he's like over there ready for stuff. We did skip lunch today. We did. Steve moment will be. Oh, you're going to get lobster rolls. It kept a decent trip. That's true. I did that last night. I didn't know it wouldn't be bad though. Oh my gosh. But that is a source of arguments is whenever you see someone else's spouse do it and then you try to see if you're supposed to don't play that game. If that was so sweet, the Peppo Shack did that for Memo Jo. But that doesn't mean you have to go do that for me. And you know what I mean? But that's a sweet scenario because it's my great-grandpa. But a lot of people, it's social media. It's like, oh, her husband did this for her. And you won't do this for me or whatever. And that's a sticky slope to get in. All right, next we have Lindsay Gerg, which is such a fun podcast issue. I do remember it was early on in our relationship. It was a big fight over the dishwasher and how things should go. And he thought that the tongs should go down. I thought that they should go up because the food, it was a whole thing, even down to the cups. And we were arguing. We were very upset about this. And I think I was like, well, then you can do the dishes all the time. But if you love it so perfectly. And come to find out, now he does do the dishes. Hey, and you're working your favorite. I do the laundry. He does the dishes. And he's particular. And sometimes we learn, sometimes they're just we're particular about certain things. And I'm not going to argue if he's going to do the dishes. Where are the tongs down now? They are. I did win that one. They are up. So he's doing the dishes. And they're up. Girl, you came out on top for that. Don't win. That's so funny. The dishes. All right, moving on along, we have the parries. And this one made me laugh. I think one of, because we've been married 11 years now. So I'm sure there's a lot of them. There's many. The one I can remember that would be the dumbest is probably we were married maybe two years. We had moved into a new apartment. Like three. Preston. Preston had, he was no longer working because he was working there, Radio Shack. And when they lived, them lived strong bracelets. Went out, you know, it was like, bro, the business is going down. And so he wasn't working. He was traveling here and there. But my book was about to come out. And so I was making a certain amount of money that I think gave me a sense of pride and entitlement, but also anxiety. And so I came home. And it's two things. You bought some shoes and he bought a basketball hoop to put on the back of the door. And in my mind. I think it was so mad. I'm like, who's money was that? You know what I'm saying? And so I'm like, yeah, why would you buy that? So we had this whole argument. Because the energy I was giving was not humble, respectful, loving. But it was from this place. So now I got a book and event to pay for them shoes that you decided to buy. Preston shoes are never $75. I mean, you got some nice shoes. He don't got TJ Max Marshall's pricest shoes. And so. And so for me, I was just irritated. Because I'm like, you know, I think that same month, I came up with this idea to like, you know, start my clothing line, which actually does really well for us right now. And she kind of like gave me her blessing. And I'm like, this basketball room actually helps me think in this place. It's so shooting or whatever. So I was like, I wasn't just at home, like, you know, playing, like I'm actually thinking about ideas. And you know what I mean? And so yeah, like. Because you ever come home work from work. And he just chilling. So it just it's just plays as part of like, so you ain't been doing nothing. Yeah, but I actually was thinking. I know you were. I know you were. You've been there. You're I do it. That's your goal. Hell sweet thing. That's a good one. It did. So that was stupid. So that was stupid. A lot of his justification though of that basketball. I know. He's like, hold on now. That was useful. All right. Now we got Sophia Watts. And then we got Miss Tara Tucker. One, I mean, it was obviously probably lying. I don't know if it was time of the month. I was always played to fact. It does. It really does. Bad day. And I am very serious when we go order food at restaurants. I don't like sauce. I don't like ketchup. I like no sauce. So I'm very serious about my salt and my seasonings. Because it's going to taste gross because I don't eat sauce. It doesn't have seasoning. There. So every time we go to the end where I'm like, can you get like an extra cup of the French fries seasoning? And I was really hungry. And I was like, don't forget. And Taylor, I like to check my food before I leave the drive-through window. And he won't. And I'm like, you know, it's easier if you just check it now. We won't have to get back through the line if it's like wrong. He left. And I was like, wait, did you check? To make sure the seasoning was in there. It's still video. I was so real. This is so real. Oh, I was so. Because I did not check. It was such a bad argument. And it wasn't even about the seasoning at that point. It got to the point where I was like, why did you just get so mad? Why are we arguing? So embarrassing. I was just talking about the fact that you're arguing. That's always with a bigger argument. So weird. I can totally relate to that. Oh, me and Christian have had very similar in the drive-through line of places. I can't remember what happened. Oh, we had a, this was similar. We had a reg, actually. It was our first time to experience a reg together. And we were just dating. Yeah, we were just, we were engaged. And we had this reg. And we both were scared on our minds, because it was like a really scary thing. Well, then we wanted to go to Chick-fil-A, because we were with Hungary. And we called a head, because we knew they were going to close. And they ended up, so they took our order. They said we got it. And we got there. And we were like, hey, we had an online order. We called a head. And we told you all we were coming. And they were closed. And we were like, no, no, no, no, no. Like we called you all. And you told us that you had it. And they were like, we don't have it. And we're closed. I did. We then turned on each other. And it was like, we were arguing with each other. And we get mad at each other. Like, you should have called to, you should have made sure. I'm like, I did make sure. I'm scared. Like, I decided right. And then like, the only place open was like, Sonny, I don't even like Sonny. I don't even want to eat anymore. And then we both, like, then he was doing so rich. I mean, I was doing so rid of him. And finally, I got out of the car. Now I'm just walking in the parking lot. And then like, and then it's so embarrassing. Because you're like, no, what do I do? Right, you got to get back in the car. And we're still like an hour away from where we're going. And then like, just the like humility that it takes to get back in the car. And then it's like, you're defying pride because you want to laugh because you know your finger is doing this. But you're like, it's not funny yet. One day we cry out, it's not today. It's not really. Oh, yeah, no. That is so real. It's so real. Hey, but if you don't have sauce, you need the season. Yeah, I have a good idea about their sauce. I hear you. Yes. So embarrassing. Like Taylor's even like, it cannot believe you said that. That is so funny. I actually forgot about that one, but that was a good one. Yeah, that was an epic one. All right, turning on the last one, Miss Tara, who is our marriage counselor. So let's see what her and her. You guys heard all of our dumb arguments. Yeah, coming from a therapist, I'm very interested to hear you. Mr. David's arguments. And I'm like, let's pick one. Everybody who knows Mr. Right, one, he is like, he is such a good man. But he's a character. Like, he smokes his cigars, and I wish he would. He grabs this big gray squirrel of a truck that sounds like a helicopter. It's like the only one. Like, where we live, there's all kinds of fancy cars. But there is this, we call it the squirrel. There's just one of them. It is the squirrel. It is something. Yeah. And he loves to drive it. And he has to wear his just khaki pants. Like, it's almost like he has a uniform. And so I learned a long time ago to choose my battles. But we've argued over him, Staley, my toothbrush. We have argued over him trying to make me drive the squirrel on a rainy day. I mean, like, it's just the silly things. But I can argue just like anybody else and go completely silly and get straight to the point. If you only loved me and I'm like, oh, that's manipulative. And passive aggressive at the same time. You're like hearing your calzwing in your ears. Yes. Yeah. And every marriage, there's someone who cares about sharing a toothbrush and there's someone who doesn't. I care. I don't care. I don't care. I'm a grassy. I care. The grassy has also recently stolen my toothbrush. People didn't need to know that because she's living with us for a little bit. And so Mr. David, like two weeks ago, I think, grassy, I'm about half it, y'all. That's disgusting. It's good to know you don't. Oh, I know. We were just in Canada. And I was like, oh, I forgot my toothbrush. In Christians like, you are not using mine. I was like, yes, I'm using yours. Yes. I was like, you kiss me. I can brush my teeth in here too. I'm not using yours. I'm not using it. I'm gonna erase it one. With the cigars. I'm like, look, if you want to end a marriage for years, for years we would argue about it. And I finally went, choose your battles woman. If that's the worst thing he's doing, and he smells like a cigar, as he drives the squirrel in his cacky pants. And listens to his stringish kind of music. Not not bad music, but I'm just like, what are you doing? Then let him make the character. Now that's good. That's good. That's good. Yeah. I'm a resident of y'all. Well, friends, I honestly, I love this. We talked about laughing a lot in this fight. Guys, you also learn a lot. And I think it all comes down to pick your battles. Don't take things too personally. Don't be too sensitive. And later in life, if you've four years down the road, you're gonna look back at memories. And those are the things you're gonna remember in a bad sense. There's gonna be things you laugh at, or can hardly even recall. And I love what y'all said. You become such a team throughout it, because then other people start to annoy you and you become each other's soundboard. I love that. I hope y'all enjoyed this episode. And leave a comment if you have a funny story with you and your marriage. We'd love to see it. This is great when you can talk about dumb arguments and not get in one after. Thank you. Great.