Cats | Send Me To Sleep

Hello, it's your host Andrew here. If you're enjoying Send Me to Sleep so far and you'd like to help support the show, the best way to do that is Send Me to Sleep Premium. Over there you'll get ad-free episodes as well as access to all of our bonus episodes. You can find a link to a 7-day free trial in the description notes. Thanks so much for listening, and here's just a few ads before the show begins. Ever since I was young, my dad never really liked cats, which I found strange because he also said that he grew up with a couple of cats in his family home and admitted that he was quite fond of them. So I was a little confused as to why he had such a negative outlook towards them. I say negative, he wasn't overly spiteful and hateful. It was more of a jovial, almost comedic kind of arch nemesis style feud that he had with cats. I think he found it frustrating that they might come into the garden of the fences and do what cats tend to do on the lawns of other people's gardens. And he would sometimes make jokes about scaring them off or throwing rocks at them. And as a young person, this made an impression on me. And I don't know if you can relate to this, but sometimes when you're young, when you hear what your parents say, or maybe just older people say, and if you respect these people, you kind of take on their opinions as if they're your own. And you don't necessarily think too deeply about their contents or their meaning or where that comes from. You kind of just start believing it yourself. And so, because of my dad's attitude towards cats, I always had this belief in myself that I didn't really like cats either. And because I never really grew up with pets in my house, I believed this for a while. I didn't have much reason or cause to come into contact with many cats. And I had this sort of impression about them that they were a little bit wily, a little bit sinister perhaps. And as a young person, I might be forgiven for thinking that, because you'll often see cats as you're going about your day to day in suburbia, hiding away, they're not as open and friendly as say a dog approaching you in the street. A cat will be crouching underneath a car and watching you as you go by. Or if you happen to catch one in an alleyway, they'll sharply stand still and stare at you with big wide eyes until you take one little step forward and they dart off in a direction unknown over a fence and gone out of nowhere. And so they seemed always a little bit elusive and somewhat menacing because of that to me as a young person. And it wasn't until I was a little bit older, maybe I was about 16 or 17 when I started interacting with some cats that belonged to a friend of mine. And this friend absolutely loved cats. They had three of them. And this was my first introduction to the world of cats and a friend, not just a friend but a whole family of people who doted on the feline. So in this environment I was of course more encouraged to become friends best I could with these cats. And it was in this moment that I realized that I didn't actually have a hostile bone in my body towards cats. This dislike of them was purely lip service as it were. It was something I would just say as a child in order to appear as though I had an opinion about something. But being near cats and slowly learning their ways and how one must interact with them, you know, being gentle and slow and putting out your hand first so as to introduce yourself. And that wonderful moment when you become friendly enough with a cat that they first decide that they would quite like to sit on your lap. And then even still having them purr as they sit. So it was just showing you that they are truly relaxed. That's quite a magical moment to have with a cat. And from that moment on I was certainly enamored with them. I grew up a healthy enjoyment of striking up friends with cats anywhere I would meet them. It was like I'd unlocked the language of cats just a little bit and came to respect them more as animals and understand that very far from being malicious or spiteful little creatures they were yes elusive. Yes quite coy and sometimes uncertain, a little bit skittish. But also very loving and often friendly especially in the experience of my friends three cats. They all had very different personalities, these cats. They were in fact mother, father and child. And they made me feel more like I think in the fact that I could in that sense anthropomorphise them into a little human family. It helped me relate to them so much more. And yes to this day I have a fond liking for cats. All animals really but especially so cats and I think that is because I spent a portion of my younger years disliking them for no reason. And so I think I feel like I have something to pay back towards cats when I see them. Another thing I think that makes me really attracted to becoming friends with a cat is the difficulty of it. As I say with a pet like a dog they are very open, very friendly, very loving which is course is magnificent and I love dogs and other pets as well. But with a cat you really must try a lot harder to gain their trust I suppose. Of course this varies wildly from cat to cat but more often than not you do have to work quite hard to get that first interaction, that first little stroke on the head especially if you don't know them very well. So a few years ago I used to live in a neighbourhood with some friends where a cat would be in and out of the garden quite frequently. In fact I don't think I've lived anywhere where cats weren't in and out of the garden quite frequently. So in the house I live currently and perhaps the one before that more so but this one as well. And to go back to this house this particular cat was a very beautiful one, it was quite small and it had silky bluish grey fur with this cute little white tuft on its chest and full bluish eyes. And I loved seeing it in the garden because it had this mysterious quality to it more so than most other cats I think because I noticed even when I was watching it and it hadn't yet noticed that it was being observed it still moved with a quiet coiness as if anywhere that it trod in our garden might hold some uncertain mystery. And it wouldn't matter how many times it would come into the garden each time it would treat it with this sort of mysterious reverence. But when it would come along I would sometimes be present to witness it there and it would notice me and the first time it noticed me it was gone quicker than I could blink right under a hole that was dug out just below the fence slid right underneath. But after that I would see it quite frequently and I was so determined to try and make friends with this cat. I called it Luna. I wasn't sure if it was a boy or a girl but Luna was the name I gave it. And after successive attempts to remain as still as I could and move really slowly and have it come just a little bit closer each time for some reason I always managed to make it feel a little bit skittish and it would run away. And I was beside myself with anger to find that one of my friends that I lived with at the time when I came down one morning was at the back door stroking Luna. I just couldn't believe that they could so easily and so quickly gain the trust when it took me so long to get so far but not even close really by comparison. Of course I wasn't truly angry. Purely the nature of cats and some people happen to be better with cats or animals even than others. There could be 101 different reasons why Luna didn't quite like the cut of my chip or perhaps had reason to be a little bit more suspicious of someone who looked like me maybe. But I was playfully vexed for a while after that. And as I say some people are just cat people. And I do even remember reading somewhere some time ago that there is something like I think in one third of people there is a specific gene that is related to the adoration of cats. And if you have this specific gene you are far more predisposed to doting on cats. And I think this is why occasionally I see that immediate families if they have cats don't dot on them and love them very much so in the same way. And of course some of this could be learned behaviour. But I wouldn't be surprised if it was in their blood so to speak. Because the way they adore cats certainly seems as if it might be. And of course adorning cats is not a niche phenomenon. Cats are adored across the world in their many shapes and forms and are a deep part of our culture really. Of course they've been in society for a long time. And it is suggested that cats were first sort of assimilated you could say into society when people started building up civilization and these houses and streets that humanity formed started to attract rats which were of course a pest and it was handy to have cats around because they would catch these rodents. And in this way they slowly became a little bit more domesticated. And I say a little bit more domesticated very intentionally because as anyone who knows cats or has cats will very much understand they are probably the least domesticated of all the domesticated animals. I don't think you can so easily tell a cat what to do as perhaps of a pet you might keep. And that sort of transactional arrangement of being kept around from way back when in early society has remained to a certain extent. In some ways their affection and the relationship with them does feel somewhat transactional from time to time. But then of course they are capable of being so loving. There's nothing quite like a wholesome cuddle with a cat. Then you can feel that they care when you are there with them. It is easy to understand why they were so highly prized and worshipped in ancient Egypt. There is a quiet dignified nature about the cat I think. So naturally dignified. It's very interesting to observe. It makes you wonder where it might have come from. I do wonder if it is that sort of deep reverence and worship from ancient Egypt that has infused cats and felines into the general fabric of our culture. And dare I say Mithos. Where cats are spread throughout folklore across the world. For that matter, not just in the western part of the world. Of course cats being very tightly linked to the idea of witches. Specifically black cats. And you can see why that might be as well. Because there is a magic behind that elusiveness. And it also makes me understand why within culture there is this myth of the cat having nine lives. And I believe that is something that is said across cultures. Over the world. Although there may be variations on that. So I believe some other such culture says that cats have seven lives. And I think there are perhaps other ways of representing sort of the idea of cats. Cats living longer than they should. Again infusing them with this sort of magic aura. But it makes sense of course because of how not only elusive and mysterious they are. But nimble and dexterous. Elusive to always land on their feet. As they say. I think I remember someone talking about the way the cats are able to land on their feet. I think I may have seen something where someone said long ago that they are certain. Even past a certain height cats will be primed to land on their feet softly. I'm not entirely sure that's definitely true. And I'm not sure I'd ever recommend anyone try it. I certainly wouldn't try it myself. But I wouldn't be surprised if it were true. Another curious and brilliant quality of cats is that they are not only hunters but survivors. They do incredible work at looking after themselves. You never worry so much about a cat as you would a dog or hamster. Maybe a bird. Cats are beautifully self-sufficient. It brings to mind this story I remember hearing now I'm not entirely sure of the details. But I do prominently remember the name of the cat which was Unsinkable Sam. And Unsinkable Sam was a cat that supposedly had taken up residence on more than one military ship, a boat out on the ocean. And I think it could have been upwards of three. All ships having sunk in or during war. But Unsinkable Sam somehow managed to survive the sinking of all of them. Hence his name. Which is evidence in itself of the wildness of cats. And why they absolutely deserve to be enshrined in the mythos of having nine lives. I guess Unsinkable Sam has used up at least three of his. Now I was talking about the cats that belong to my friend and my teens. And I became quite close with those cats over the years until I stopped seeing them so much. But as I say, they gave me my appreciation of cats in general. No I can't say that I've had much interaction with cats. Since. Not so closely at least. And the times that I have interacted with cats. Have again been quite fleeting and have not managed to gain the trust so much. Though sometimes I have. There was. Some cats that belong to my friend another friend. They knew. Many years later. And they were extremely loving. And if I may say lazy cats. That is something oddly paradoxical. Excuse me oddly paradoxical about cats. Is that. They can be so wily and skittish. And alert. And nimble in one breath. And then so reclined and lazy. The next. There is that quintessential image of a cat. Curled up into a tight ball. Sat upon a pillow. On a cozy bed. Swinging its tail back and forth. That is somehow. The. Absolute pinnacle. Of the encapsulation. Of comfort. And coziness. So funny they should. Be able to symbolize something like that. Whilst also being so. Skittish from time to time. But maybe. That's why. Maybe that is. The yin yang of their existence. To a certain degree it makes sense. That. If one is capable of being. So. Aware of their surroundings. And. So keen so alert. To danger. Able to. Be ready and pounce. Then. In the inverse of that when they are. Finally safe and ready to relax. They are able to really. Really relax. I wonder what it's like. To be a cat like that. Sometimes I wonder. As I see the cat. Wander through our garden. In this house that we live in now. How far they've been. Today. Because of course I just see them. Skirting along the back of our fence and. Maybe weaving their way. Past our greenhouse and up over the next. But. Conceivably. And I think there's even evidence to. Support this. Cats can. Head out and trek for miles around. Should they wish. Going on all sorts of. Wild adventures that. You'd know nothing about. I'm sure this is a thought. That many cat owners have and if you own a cat you may. Have thought this before as you. Let your cat out in the morning. And don't see them until lunchtime. Who think where have you been. All these hours what have you been up to. And of course sometimes. You can be well aware what they're up to. If they come back. Particularly mucky. Or perhaps. Bearing a gift. An unwanted gift. At that. Do you understand my reference. But. Otherwise. Just wouldn't know. It's fun to imagine. What kinds of adventures. They might get up to. Weaving their way through. Bushels. In the overgrowth. In between houses. Exploring. Little hidey holes. Between. Plant posts. And electric boxes. Perhaps making their way to fields. Jumping through crops. Chasing mice. Of course. Working their way up trees. Taking a nap. Just below the canopy. Or even. As we all know cats. Sometimes like to do. Going to a whole other family. I've lived in places before where. If you leave the door open. A cat will. Very happily. Wandering. As if. It were perfectly natural. To enter any of the places. Or. To enter any house that they please. I remember. One. Poignant moment. I say poignant. I mean. Poignant just in the sense that I remember it fondly. There was a. Ginger cat. That lived in the area. Nearby. My old house. The one. Before the one I currently live in. And. He would often try to get in. And successfully do so. But was most frequently caught. By. The back door. Sniffing around the kitchen. And weed. Not be too firm. But very polite for me. To leave. And he would. Quite sharply. I'll say. But there was one particular time. When. We happened to be working in the garden. And very occupied with our work. We're doing quite a lot of digging. And planting. And so occupied we were. And realized we'd left the door open. Quite a bit. And when we were finished. We put down our shovels. And turned around. To head back into the house. And as we. Looked to the house there. Up. In the back bedroom window. Staring down at us. Thoroughly enjoying watching us. As we worked away. As that little ginger cat. So. Funny. So. Curious. And endearing. Even though. I would say if a person. Were. Comparable. Of the same crimes. It wouldn't be quite so endearing. But of course cats. They get away with it. Honestly I think. Perhaps not even. Dogs. Would get away. With. Watching you. From your own bedroom window. As you work away. Having rudely interloaped in the arm. But that is just so. Typical. Of a cat. Well my friends. Recently. Got kittens. I say recently this was perhaps. A year ago now. And so they are. Far from kittens. They're quite large. But. They're called them. Gimli. And Gandalf. Because. One is grey. And one is ginger. And of course. He's a huge talking fan. And they're marvellous cats. I think he did a fantastic thing. In. Bringing up. Two. At the same time. Not to say that there's anything wrong. With. Having one cat. But. It is. So joyful. To watch. As two kittens. Grow up. Together. And. Have affection for each other. In that way. When they've known each other. From. Very young. And they. Look after each other. They groom each other. They sleep. Nested. Upon each other. In a tight little curl. They're very sweet cats. If cats exist on a spectrum. I would say. These cats. Yeah. Towards. The side of. Avert friendliness. Coming up to. Say hello. As soon as you enter the room. When I think about cats. They're very sweet cats. If cats exist on a spectrum. When I think about cats. I can't help. But. Invision. Beak cats. As well. Blind. Tigers. Leopards. But specifically. A particular. Beak cat. Beak cat. Beak cat. Beak cat. Of some legend. Of held my part. And the place I grew up. And the place I grew up. There he is. There he is. A story. Of. A black panther. A black panther. That leaves. That leaves. Perhaps lived. In the area. And. A few people had seen it. Enough that. Word got around. Of this. Huge black cat. That was. Prowling about. The abandoned railway lines. Behind our house. And of course this was mostly taken. With a pinch of salt. Where I live. It would be. Rather unusual. For a large black cat. To be seen. It wouldn't make. A lot of sense. There to be one. But. I swear. To this day. That I most certainly saw it. And I'll never forget seeing it. I was. 14 years old. And. In the garden. With my dad. And my brother. At the time. Trying to figure out. How to fix. The lawnmower. Which was upturned. And. Unplugged. And they were. Digging out tufts of grass. To inspect. The blade and the motor. To see why it might not be. Spinning. In its usual fashion. And they were having quite an. Animated conversation. About the technical aspects of it. One that I had begun to. Phase out of. As they carried on talking. And so my eyes drifted. To the horizon. Over the back of our back fence. Past the trees. And on to. The line. Of the abandoned railway. Which sat. Almost. As if looking over us. As if we were. In a small valley. I suppose. And. Gracefully. And smoothly. Walking. Walking. Along this railway line. Was the image. Of a black cat. And now. I couldn't quite tell. Because it was quite far away. Whether it was black. In its entirety. Or appeared black. Because. It was silhouetted. And it was done. And some might say. That. I could have confused the scale. And I was watching. A regular size cat. Offered a distance. But. The thing that made me believe. More than anything. That it was. A big cat. Was the tail. I remember thinking. I watched it. This huge. Swaying thing. That that tail. Was far too big. Far too swooping and lumbering. To be the tail. Of an ordinary size cat. And the way it moved. So smooth. But its feet. Its paws. Plodding. As if there was some weight. Some force. Some strength. Behind those. Limbs. It felt so much. Like a big cat. And the frustrating thing was. The entire time it was there. I was trying to draw it. The attention. Of my father. My brother. Of course they were far too invested. In. The problem of the lawn mower. To turn around. And eventually. I was so emphatic. That they simply. Were. So emphatic. That they simply had to stop what they were doing. And look. It had gone. And so. I only have. My own memory. My own word. That's strange event. But I hold to this day. That there was most certainly. Something larger than a house cat. That strolled past us. That day. I don't know if it's still there. I don't think it would make sense for it still to be there. Though I could. Imagine. A little family. Of Panthers. Piding away. In the dense. Forest. Overgrowth. That was then. At the back. Of that old abandoned railway line. Making a little home for themselves. Surviving. As they could. And maybe. They had some cubs. Who grew up. Are still living there today. Keeping their secret hide in place. Still a secret. I don't know if that's true. But I do like to imagine it. We are getting to the point. My partner and I. After. Just having recently. Had a child. That the idea of. Pets. Bees. Coming into discussion. More and more. My partner. She had pets growing up. But I did not. My. Mum was never. A huge fan. Of animals. In that way. And so. I have this hesitancy. Around having a pet. Not because I don't like animals. I think I'd certainly like one. Especially. For our son. I think it would be. A wonderful experience. To. Learn to love and care. And respect. An animal. In that way. But I suppose. My hesitancy is. In that unknown. I've never. Possible. For an animal. In that way. But I think. I wouldn't feel so bad. If. At least for our first pet. We got a cat. Because. From everything I know about them. I think they'd be. Pretty good. At looking out for themselves. More of a. Equal partner. In the relationship. Then. Perhaps. A caretaker. I can imagine having a cat. In the home. Wandering around lazily. Sleeping at the end of the bed. Purring. By the wood stove fire. In the winter time. Sitting on our son's lap. Purring. As he strokes them. Then. There'd be a lot of joy in that. Not just for us. But hopefully for the cat as well. So hopefully. We do see a cat. In our future. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see. 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