pressure & the enemy exposed

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But I think I felt it within myself that I have been putting such a pressure on myself to show up, perform, say the right things, do the right things. And so I am still learning how to shed off pressure. And I actually posted about it today. Shocker. I posted specifically about pressure on my socials today. And some of you guys were like, pressure is good. Like it means that you're being pruned. And I think that there is like a different tone of there's two different sources of pressure. Okay, we can either get pressure from the source of Jesus, where it's like, you can tell that he's putting you through the fire. He's putting you through a pruning season. He's putting you through something that is like genuinely challenging you and growing you. Like I feel like I can sense the difference when I'm being challenged by Jesus to grow more and kind of being like fathered by him in that way, where he's like, all right, we're going to push, we're going to, I'm pruning you, like I'm growing you, you're learning, this is good versus like pressure of the enemy where it just makes you feel like a failure. It makes you feel like you suck. It makes it feel like you fall short, no matter what you do. It makes you feel like whatever you do is actually really cringy. Like even if you're giving something, you're all you're like, it's like, still not enough. Like it's very like shame driven, which is like, ew, no, big no, no. And so that's not the kind of pressure I'm talking about of like from Abba, where he's like, okay, honey, we're going to grow, because I know what that pressure feels like. It's the pressure of the enemy where it like literally makes me feel like crap about myself. And typically, if I'm feeling like crap about myself, it's a dead sign that it's from the pits of hell, and it's not from God. So that is the kind of pressure that I'm like trying to learn how to just not come into agreement with and like not allow it to affect how I feel about myself, how I see myself, what I think about myself, because it does it like genuinely affects the way that I feel about myself and like makes me like not like myself, those voices do. So we know that's not God. Because if anything, God's wants to build us up and to even receive more freedom and identity in like who we are through him. And with that comes pride of like, this is who I am in confidence. And that's not what this pressure is making me feel like. So that's just me being honest. It's gross. It sucks. And I think that if we listen to that voice too many times, we condition ourselves to just kind of take it when we are so willing to listen to those voices, it really does become conditioning, where we're just like used to hearing that and we forget that we have a choice to one, entertain it, listen to it, believe it, you know, like we do have a choice. And so I'm choosing right now today, and if this is something you've also been struggling with, let's do it collectively together, but I come out of agreement with any lie that has come into my head telling me that I'm not doing enough and that I need to do more, but then no matter what I do isn't enough. And it makes me feel like crap, like I come out of agreement with those things and I come into the agreement of truth, which is that I was fearfully and wonderfully made by the Lord. And that's it. So yeah, it's gross pressure, pressure is weird. And it like makes you not even want to do the things that you enjoy. And that's probably got to be the enemy's entire goal in it is that if you weren't a threat to him, he wouldn't be attempting to discourage you in the things that you're doing, right? And so a lot of you guys are probably listening to this being like how in the world, Ali, like you've seen the fruit of your works, I'd say like with the podcast being where it's at and Jesus, it's all God glory to the Lord. But yeah, I mean, with that though comes territory of like the enemy does not like it. And he wants you to stop. And so in any way that he can discourage you and convince you that what you're doing isn't enough. Even though there's been proof that what you're doing is like in the Lord's will and the favor of the Lord is on it. I believe the favor of the Lord is on this podcast, right? It's like we are glorifying him. It's all about him. The enemy will try everything he can to convince you that that's not the case. So that's gross. I don't like those lies. Anyway, we're moving on. And we're gonna have a great episode today in Jesus name. I plead the blood of Jesus over this podcast. Lord, I pray that your Holy Spirit flows through this podcast. God, I pray that wherever my friend is out on the other ends, Lord, that you meet them there. God, if they're washing their dishes, that they're sink, if they are working at the hospital right now, God, if they are on their walk, if they are at the drive through right now on their lunch break, Jesus, if it is their commute in the morning, God, I just pray that you meet them there, Lord, I pray your Holy Spirit fills whatever room they're in, whatever space that they're in, God, I pray that you flood their bodies, God, Holy Spirit, I pray a fresh baptism of the Holy Spirit, I pray fresh joy in Jesus name, I pray fresh hope, fresh faith, God, thank you, Lord, that you died on the cross for us, that you put shame and death and sin to death, God, you overcame all of it, even shame. And so we bind it now in the name of Jesus. We plead the blood of Jesus over our bodies from the top of our heads to the bottom of our feet. And let us remember who we are walking with, that we walk in the authority of Jesus. We are not walking in this life alone. I believe, God, we all believe collectively, come into agreement with the truth that we are all fearfully and wonderfully made through you, Lord, and that we can do all things through Christ. I bind any tactic of the enemy off of my friend and myself, Jesus, as the body, we pray. Any schemes of the enemy, God, we thank you that you've already promised in your word that no weapons formed against us will prosper. No weapons of the enemy against the body of Christ will prosper. I declare that and I denounce any demonic entities, spirits, voices, anything that is not of heaven. I bind you and I send you back to the Pitzfell where you belong. You have no right to be here. You have no authority to be here. I pray all of this in Jesus name. I plead the blood, God, speak to your people in this episode. In Jesus name, amen. I needed to let the enemy know that I remembered. We all remember who we are through Christ, that we've been redeemed by the blood, we've been made new, we've been washed clean. We are property of Jesus. Enemy, get out of here. I bind him and I send him back to the Pitzfell where he will not return from. Dude, you know what's so freaking awesome about the Bible? God tells us what's going to happen. It's not a mystery to us. It's not a mystery to the enemy of where he's going and where we're going. And so that's the other thing that I need to remember. I am humbling myself right now and admitting and honestly repenting for not having like heavenly sight. But sometimes I get so caught up with seeing what's right in front of me instead of being like, no, but there's so much more. This is just a spec. What we do here on earth is so important, but oh my gosh, let it not be more important than where we are going in our like actual real life, which is the afterlife of our lives here on earth with Jesus in heaven for all of eternity. Like that's the goal. That's the goal. That's the site. That's where our eyes are every day is we look at that. Oh man. Yeah, that's crazy. One time I had a question where like earlier in my in my journey of my walk with the Lord, I was like, if the enemy knows his fate, like he knows where he's going and he knows that he loses, like why is he fighting so hard to like win? It genuinely like shook me up because I'm like, bruh, if you already know who's going to win the Super Bowl here in the spirit, it's God, the boss, the one who never loses. He wins every Super Bowl. Okay. But I'm like, why even try like if you already know it's written, promised, said by the Lord that you will be cast to hell for all of eternity. Why are you even trying? What fight is there to fight if you already know you're going to lose? And I don't remember who I was talking to at the time, but they were like, I mean, the thing is, is like you could go into any fight knowing that you you will lose in the end. Let's say that you go into a fight and you know you're going to lose. Somebody tells you the future. They're like, yep. Would you still give it your all though? Even though you know you're going to lose, would you just lay down? Or would you be like, okay, I know I'm going to lose, but you know what, I'm going to give it all I got. I also think the enemy has too much pride to like not try all he can to do as much damage as he can while he has the time to do it. Do you know what I mean? So it's not that he believes he's going to win, but it's also like, why wouldn't he put up a fight to make as much damage to hurt God as much as he can while he has the time to do it to deceive, mislead, bring people away from him like as much as he could do that as well. Why wouldn't he do that until the day comes? So it's not that the enemy's goal is to win because he knows he can't, but his goal is to do as much damage while he has the time to do it. And so that's why we never get a break. That's why we never get a break here on earth. Sometimes I'm like, give it a break, bro. You know you're losing, but that's the point is he knows he's losing. It's not about winning. It's about making as much turmoil, killing, stealing, and destroying as much as he can until he can't anymore. Oh, Jesus, we need you God. Feel free to come back. Feel free to come back anytime. Yeah, that's why we don't get a break. So anyway, also, this was an interesting conversation I had with my dad, I think it was a couple months ago. And we were talking about the enemy. He actually asked, he was like, or I don't remember how it went. We somehow got to the topic of like why the Lord even allows the enemy to be like, why did he even let him do what he's doing? How did the enemy even become like if God is God and he could just like, why hasn't he and why is he letting him and why is this happening? How did it even begin from the beginning? Like how did Lucifer do what he, how did God let and the truth is, is something that I learned because I ended up doing research after this conversation with my dad because I was so curious is that the same free will that God gave us, he gave the angels. A lot of you guys might know this already, but at the time when I was having that conversation with my dad, I was like, that's such a good point. Like, how did that happen? And why does God let him? It's about free will. It comes down to free will again, just as it does with us. So it was actually in Lucifer's free will that he decided to go against the Lord. And then it was also in the free will of all the other angels that he kind of grouped and convinced. And then they were sent out of heaven and they were sent here on earth. Hey guys, it's me again. Okay, I need to tell you something really quick. So I have been using the same mattress for as many years as I can't remember, but I know that I know that I know that I bought it for like maybe two or $300 off of like Amazon. Okay, I have been using this mattress from Brooklyn bedding. Okay, the model that I have is the Aurora Luxe cooling mattress. Oh, it's a premium design with advanced cooling technology because your girl gets a little toasty at night and it's changed my life. The first thing I noticed about my mattress from Brooklyn bedding was how stable and solid it felt as if it was built to last decades and not just a few years. 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And if you don't, I'd honestly be concerned and I'd want to know what you're doing because if you've even spent five minutes on social media lately, you've heard more bad news than your brain ever asked for, which is one of the reasons many reasons why my stress levels are on constant alert. But that's where cortisol calming from veracity comes in. Running a podcast, deadlines, family side hustles, it's easy for my brain to turn into mush. I take cortisol calming so I can stay sharp and keep my stress under control even when everything else feels crazy. Veracity is an all natural way to reduce stress with veracity is drug free, clinically proven and doctor formulated solutions. You can support your body's needs to live your healthiest life. I love when something is scientifically legit, but doesn't come with a warning label that makes me panic like side effects might be death or illness. 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Poppy doesn't hit the same guys. We do have it in our glass little travel cup. I will say we are going to be coming out with merch. I've been working on it with my team for months now. And I'm really excited about it because it's lit. Okay, we're bringing it all to the next level. And what I'm excited about this merch is that it's not just gonna, it's not gonna say Christ with coffee on ice on everything. I think the first round of merch was really cool for that where it was like, okay, we love CWCOI, whatever. But this round I was like, I really just wanted to be about Jesus. I want these pieces to have a message of his goodness, his faithfulness, who he is, that he is our Messiah, he's died for us, right? And so these pieces are really cool. They're very evangelistic, which is so fun. So as you're wearing it, you're going to be telling people about the gospel. And it's giving a little bit more like streetwear kind of fashion versus like, merchy vibes. Do you get what I'm saying? So anyway, we're going to be coming out with all new stuff. I don't know when, but we are in the very last stages. I think now I just kind of have to sample like, we've got the designs down. But now I just want to make sure that I actually like the quality of the pieces. So I'm really stinking stoked about it. Like I'm going to genuinely want to wear all of these pieces just in my life. Yeah, in my life every day. And so this cup probably won't be available. If you like this, then you can go to, you can shop our merch. It's just my first and last name.com, aliyos.com. But we're going to have different cups. So you can either wait for the new ones or if you really like this design, you can grab it. It won't be available for much longer. But yeah, I'm really, so you did about that. Okay, anyway, should we talk about the devil? I didn't know we were going to talk about him so much. But here's the thing. Actually, I'm fine with it. Because too many times I feel like in the church, we're too afraid to like confront and talk about the elephant in the room, which is the enemy. Okay, or it could go one of two ways. Either we're too afraid to acknowledge him, or we acknowledge him too much where we're like, honestly, giving him a little bit too much credit when we should be taking ownership. In more things, I feel like we could go either way where it's like, we're too scared to really acknowledge it. And if we do, we just don't want to give him any attention. We don't even want him to know that we know that he's there, which is just like domineering. It's like, look at the freaking creep that's standing in the corner, look him in the eye and say, I rebuke you in Jesus name. I see what you're doing. I know you're there. Go to hell. The ignoring one I don't get. I do it sometimes, though. I'm not innocent. I do it sometimes too. But the ignoring one, I don't get it. I'm also guilty of blaming the devil, maybe probably too much for things where it's like, ah, or you caused this mess yourself out. Or it just, you know, you just, it was bad. It just bad timing, you know, things just kind of happen. It's not always the devil. But anyway, I don't know if we've ever even really like talked about him on the podcast for an entire episode, but I guess that's what we're going to do. Okay, Jesus, he really wants us to talk about the devil today. Okay. I think today is about exposing him. So that's kind of fun. Okay. Our first question when it comes to the devil, I love saying his name like that because it makes me think of like the sweetest, like Baptist Southern me, Maul who goes and the devil. Like I just love to say it with like a Southern accent. Anyway, so the devil, why did the devil turn evil? Let's just start with that question. Let's just start with the, with the, with the main question of like, why, why did that happen? How did that happen? Now, obviously the Bible doesn't give us a play by play of Satan's fall, but it does give us pieces. And I think that's like the Bible in general, right? If we were to know everything play by play, I think did Apostle Paul say it? Somebody said it in the Bible where they were like, if we were to write down all of the things that Jesus did, it's impossible. Like the book would be too big to ever read. Somebody find that scripture for me. I know that said somewhere in the Bible, but basically it was said that like, if we were to write down everything, right? So anyway, we're going to get pieces of it. But Satan was originally created as a beautiful, powerful angel. And two passages that traditionally connected to his fall are Isaiah 1412 through 15 and Ezekiel 2812 through 17. Let's actually look those up. Let's look up Isaiah 14. Who is life? Okay, I don't know where those are. I'm going to have to go to the table of contents. The devil. Okay, that's my vocal stem. My vocal stem is the devil. Okay, Isaiah 1412, which reads, How you are fallen from heaven, O shining star, Son of the morning, you have been thrown down to the earth, you who destroyed the nations of the world. For you said to yourself, I will ascend to heaven and set my throne above God's stars. I will preside on the mountains of the gods far away in the north. I will climb to the highest heavens and be like the most high. Instead, you will be brought down to the place of the dead, down to its lowest depths. Everyone there will stare at you and ask, can this be the one who shook the earth and made the kingdoms of the world tremble? Is this the one who destroyed the world and made it into a wasteland? Is this the king who demolished the world's greatest cities and had no mercy on his prisoners? And then Ezekiel 2812 starts by saying, Son of man, sing this funeral song for the king of Tyre. Give him this message from the sovereign Lord. You were the model of perfection, full of wisdom and a quizzet in beauty. You were in Eden, the Garden of God. Your clothing was adorned with every precious stone. Pale green Peridot, white Moonstone, blue green Barrel, Anx, green Jasper, blue Lapis, lazuli, turquoise and emerald, all beautifully crafted for you and set in the finest gold. They were given to you on the day you were created. I ordained and anointed you as the mighty angelic guardian. You had access to the holy mountain of God and walked among the stones of fire. You were blameless in all you did from the day you were created until the day evil was found in you. Your rich commerce led you to violence and you sinned, so I banished you in disgrace from the mountain of God. I expelled you, almighty guardian. From your place among the stone of fire, your heart was filled with pride because of all your beauty. Your wisdom was corrupted by your love of splendor, so I threw you to the ground and exposed you to the curious gaze of kings. You defiled your sanctuaries with your many sins and your dishonest trade, so I brought fire out from within you and it consumed you. I reduced you to ashes on the ground in the sight of all who were watching. All who knew you are appalled at your fate. You have come to a terrible end and you will exist no more. That's heavy. And what's so sad is it sounds like the devil had everything, but because he had everything he had gotten arrogant and prideful. It says that his heart was actually filled with pride because of all of his beauty and his wisdom was corrupted by his love of splendor. So it was almost like because of all of the ways that God honestly spoiled him. This is God's heart. He wants to give everything to those who he loves and has created. It's just sad that it ended up doing the opposite for Lucifer, or at least the guy just got comfortable and he got arrogant and his head was really big. And it sounds like the Lord put him in charge of a lot of things. It's clear that he was a high ranking angel in heaven. And so it looks like because of all of that power, responsibility, favor, favor from the Lord that the enemy got really prideful. What if my friends secretly hate me? Something bad will happen if I don't do this. Does God really still love me after what I've done? Do you ever have thoughts like these? I'm talking about unwanted thoughts that play on loop in your mind over and over. Thoughts like that can be signs of OCD, but because OCD is so misunderstood, a lot of people don't even know that it can show up that way. OCD is a common, highly misunderstood mental health condition that causes intrusive thoughts and a powerful urge to do something to neutralize those thoughts. The thing is, is these behaviors only provide short-term relief. The unwanted thoughts, fears, and doubts always come back and that's why OCD can be so debilitating. The good news is OCD is highly treatable with a specific kind of therapy called ERP or exposure and response prevention. And that's why I want to tell you about NoCD. So NoCD is the world's leading provider of OCD treatment and all of their licensed therapists truly understand OCD and specialize in ERP therapy. Therapy with NoCD is 100% virtual, covered by insurance for over 138 million Americans and includes support between sessions. So you're never facing OCD alone. To learn more about starting OCD therapy with NoCD, go to nocd.com and book a free call with their team. That's nocd.com to learn more and start getting help. I want to talk directly to the college women listening right now who love Jesus and are craving more intentional community because this is for you. Delight Ministries is a college women's community with chapters on over 200 college campuses. Each chapter hosts a weekly gatherings with incredible curriculum written just for college women. This gathering unites women on your campus and creates vulnerable conversations centered around Jesus. They also host worship events and fun gatherings that create a true sense of community. It's a place you can be known, challenged, and can ultimately change the culture of your entire campus. I will say this was something that I didn't have the opportunity to experience because one, I wasn't walking with Jesus yet at the time of when I was going to college and two, I didn't really have the college experience. I went to community college, but knowing that something like this is available now, I wish that I had known. And here's the really cool part. If there isn't a Delight chapter already on your campus, you could be the one to start it. And here's how it works. You fill out an interest form, you'll get connected with your own Delight coach who will equip and train you to build a team, become an official campus org, and hopefully see hundreds of girls gathering together in the name of Jesus at your school. If you get the sense that God is calling you to be a leader on your campus, head to delightministries.com slash start a Delight to get started today. It's crazy to think about what God could do through your simple yes. That's delightministries.com slash start a Delight to see God move on your campus. So the truth to the question of why did the enemy turn evil? I think that it speaks volumes in both of these passages that it was because of pride, self-exaltation, and wanting to be like God, wanting to be God. Which aren't we all a little bit guilty of that one? Yeah. Yeah, when it said in Isaiah, I will ascend, I will make myself like the most high. That's the core issue. It's pride. So instead of worshiping God, he actually wanted God's position. And the thing that's important to know, which we were already touching on a little bit when I was sharing my conversation that I had with my dad, is that angels like humans were created with free will. Love and loyalty are only real if they're chosen. So Satan chose rebellion. And that rebellion is what we now call evil. That is the word evil summed up is just rebellion against God against all things good and holy and pure and righteous. So the next question with that could just be like, well, okay, so why does God let him? That might be a hard thing for us to try to wrap our minds around or to try to understand. Because if God is all powerful, why not just like erase Satan and stop him, you know? And there just are a few key things to understand first. Satan is not equal to God. He's not God's opposite in like a yin yang sense. He's a created being. He's limited. He operates only within what God permits. And I think a great example of that is the entire book of Job. Like we see in the book of Job that the enemy makes Job's life a living hell. And Job has to overcome and endure and suffer a lot. But what's interesting is that at the beginning of Job, you can see that Satan actually can't do anything, anything unless he goes through God first. He actually has to ask the Lord permission first. He's only allowed to operate with whatever God actually permits him to do. So God is sovereign. Satan is not. Also another thing that I learned about Satan is because he is not equal to God, it means that he is not omnipresent. For a while, I kind of thought that Satan was watching me the same way that God could be with me and watch me all the time. And that's not true. The devil can't watch you every moment of the day, every waking second an hour of your life. Granted, there are demons that he can send and they mess with us. But he's not omnipresent. Like the devil can't actually know what you're doing at all times. We just got to remember that he's not like God. The devil is still created by God, just as we are. He is a created being and he's limited. I think sometimes we just look at God and the devil in our minds maybe sometimes. If you guys don't do this then tea, you guys are healthy, I love that for you. But I know for a fact sometimes I can give the enemy a little bit too much credit in my mind where it's like God and the devil and they're like equal and they're both just as powerful and I'm like wait a minute, no, this guy actually can't do anything without asking the Lord first. Secondly, the guy is not omnipresent, he's not of God. He doesn't have He's not a God, period. He wants to be God, but he's not. So the reason why the Lord lets the devil, why he lets him be him, is because if God removed every possibility of rebellion or temptation, free will wouldn't really exist. Love wouldn't be love, obedience wouldn't be meaningful, faith wouldn't require trust. God allows the possibility of evil because he allows real choice. And what's even more remarkable and amazing and honestly ends up giving God more glory in the end is that despite evil in the world, despite the tactics of the enemy, despite all the things that he's stirring up, he's killing, stealing, destroying, all of the things that are happening, God still uses even evil for his purpose. And the cross is the ultimate example. Satan thought he won when Jesus was crucified, but through that act, God actually defeated sin and death. God does not cause evil, but he can redeem it, which is just another example of how sovereign he is. We truly know God is sovereign when we can watch him take something that should have been so devastating. And it honestly probably can still be and is devastating. But we know the sovereignty of the Lord and we know that he's in charge because when we see things like that being redeemed, things that are so evil of the world, things that are so awful that even happen in our personal lives, when we see those kinds of things being redeemed and we see the good that actually comes out of it, there is no denying that God is in charge. At the end of the day, the Lord will use everything for his glory and he will turn everything to good. He doesn't cause evil, but he redeems it every single time. And I do think that it's worth diving into the topic of like that real pressure of having to perform or show up or do enough. And even when we're doing enough, it's still not enough. Like that feeling of pressure versus, you know, the kind of pressure that the Lord could put on us in a growth way. But if we're to talk about that like ugly pressure that's like shame and performative and it just makes you feel like nothing you do is enough. I think the first thing that we should all do, I'm literally preaching to myself right now, we are all in this together. But the first thing even I could do is identify what I think is actually at stake. Because I think the reason that we even fall into the pit of pressure is because we feel like something is at stake. We feel like if we don't, then we lose something. And it could sound like if I don't do this perfectly, what does it say about me? Or if this flops, who am I? Or if people aren't impressed, am I still valuable? Like identify the thing that you genuinely believe is at stake. And honestly, I am already feeling it right now, where I'm like, boop, there it is. I know the thing that I feel like is at stake if I don't do XYZ. Performance pressure almost always hides a belief my worth is tied to my output. That belief is heavy, and it's not true. And there is a difference like performance will say something like I have to impress versus faithfulness says I have to just show up. I just have to show up and be faithful and be consistent. Even Jesus didn't heal everyone. Even Paul had seasons of weakness. Even David failed publicly. God works through surrendered people, not impressive ones. And one other thing that we should probably do is separate our identity from the actual outcome. One thing that we could practice saying is that the result of this does not determine my worth. So whatever way that this goes, whatever thing that you're worried about, however this happens, does not actually determine my worth. Because my identity is not put in that. Amen. Amen. The enemy is always wanting us to put our identity in other things that are just not Jesus. And so if there is a pressure of performance, it's probably because we are believing a lie that is now causing us to have our identity in something that isn't the Lord, like results. So denouncing that fear and replacing it with the results of whatever this is actually does not determine my worth. Sorry, that's not true. I think another thing that's real is even just like the pressure of showing up for people in your life. Like I don't know if you guys relate to this, but sometimes I know I felt that if I don't show up as a certain version of myself that day, like I let's say I'm just like having an off day or I haven't been feeling like myself. If I don't show up in a certain way that I believe I'm supposed to show up, then I've like failed everybody around me. But not even your energy on a given day is your identity. Like even if you don't feel like you're showing up as the version you quote, think you're supposed to be showing up as, that isn't your identity. And you're allowed to be human. So instead of things that could be going through your mind like, did I crush it? Did everyone love it? Did it go viral? Whatever. Okay, we're going to replace it with things like, well, was I honest? Was I obedient? Was I aligned with who I actually am? That shift can change everything. Another thing that we can remember is pressure actually thrives and grows the more in perfectionism. And I don't know if we have any listeners here that struggle with perfectionism. I didn't think that I did, but when I get in these weird little funks, I'm like, maybe there's a pinch of that going on right now. But I think it's a really good reminder to let ourselves be human. It's okay to have an off day. It's okay to not say it perfectly. It's okay to try something that didn't land. It's okay to change direction. You are allowed to evolve. You were never meant to perform your way into being enough. You already are. You don't have to earn oxygen. You don't have to earn love. You don't have to earn God. You just have to breathe and show up. That's really beautiful. And so that's our reminder today, is we just need to show up. We just need to be faithful. And I really think that the question that we need to ask ourselves when we are feeling all the pressure or, you know, if those really ugly thoughts come up that are like, you're still not doing enough. It's still not enough. And you're a loser, by the way. When those things come up, like we need to ask ourselves, but am I being faithful? But am I doing the thing that the Lord is telling me to do? Am I being honest? Like, is this me? Am I being authentically myself right now? In whatever version that is of you in that moment? Like, if that's a version of you that's showing up tired, but you're still showing up, great. All he wants is for us, if he wants our yes, right? And sometimes when we come to him with our yes, it can vary. We could either be coming to him in our yes with pom poms, or we're kind of dragging ourselves there and we're like, yes, God, but I'm dragging. That's okay. I'm still currently in Genesis right now. And one of the things that I read that stuck out to me was like, even if we don't get it right, even when we mess up, even when we sin, like whatever that may look like, even if we don't do things perfectly, the thing that is actually deeply valued by the Lord is character. And I was reading in Genesis 18. And it's that part where Abraham is told to leave Sodom, because the Lord was going to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah because it had become so corrupt and evil. And so the Lord was telling Abraham, he said, I have heard a great outcry from Sodom and Gomorrah, because their sin is so flagrant. I don't know what that means, but I would imagine a lot. It's a lot. I am going down to see if their actions are as wicked as I have heard. If not, I want to know. And Abraham approached God and said, Will you sweep away both the righteous and the wicked? Suppose you find 50 righteous people living there in the city, will you still sweep it away and not spare it for their sakes? Surely you wouldn't do such a thing, destroying the righteous along with the wicked. Why, you would be treating the righteous and the wicked exactly the same. Surely you wouldn't do that. Should not the judge of all the earth do what is right? And the Lord replied, If I find 50 righteous people in Sodom, I will spare the entire city for their sake. Then Abraham spoke again, Since I have begun, let me speak further to my Lord, even though I am but dust and ashes. Suppose there are only 45 righteous people, rather than 50. Will you destroy the whole city for the lack of five? And then the Lord says, I will not destroy it if I find 45 righteous people. And then Abraham kind of goes back and forth with God for a while. This honestly reminded me of like when a toddler kind of goes back and forth with their parent, you know, and just the patience that God demonstrates with Abraham in this moment is the same patience that he has for all of us. But Abraham just keeps going back and forth and he goes, Okay, well, what if you find 40? Like, will you still have mercy on them and spare the city? Okay, well, what about 30? What about 20? What about 10? And by the end of it, God was like, the Lord replied, Then I will not destroy it for the sake of the 10. When the Lord had finished his conversation with Abraham, he went on his way and Abraham returned to his tent. And so the message in this was that God's concern isn't a number game. In this scenario, it was, it didn't matter how many good righteous people there were, it was that there were righteous people. And so it wasn't that God was concerned about the numbers, he was concerned more about the character, he cares more about our character. And so I say all of this to say, I know, maybe that was a long road to feel like we were looping back to what we were even talking about. But that is just one of many examples of how God is truly just concerned with our faithfulness. And so if you're honestly like, I surrender pressure, I surrender, putting any extra pressure on myself to perform or do more like honestly, if I can ask myself the question, I can answer it confidently of, am I showing up right now faithfully? Am I doing what God wants me to do? Am I saying yes, regardless of how I feel? Am I being authentically myself? Is this natural? Does this feel like me? Then that's all that matters. So anyway, that was my brain dump of the day. Hopefully I didn't just project on you guys, we were like, actually Ali, I never struggle with that at all. I don't know what you're talking about. If that's the case, I want your brain. But I really do hope that through my little funny off days, and me sharing that with you guys, that it also blesses y'all and lets you know that you're not alone in this and also like, everything's fine. This is just a spec compared to eternity with the Lord. And so maybe we just need to take ourselves a little less seriously too. I think pressure comes in when it's like we just put like things are too serious. Maybe just like let loose and have a little fun, you know? And just have fun with Jesus and be like, is this what, but is this what Jesus would want me to do? Okay, then I'm just gonna have fun, you know, it's gonna be okay. And also he's so sovereign. So even when we mess up, even if we don't say it right, or like if we do try things that are new and they flop or whatever, like he's sovereign over all of it. So that's another piece that we need to remember is that when we want to fall into perfectionism and control, we remember that ultimately, God is still the one in control. And no matter how much we try to control something, he's still in charge. The enemy is actually a very good example of that. The guy tried to control and take matters into his own hands and become his own God and be like the most high. And it didn't work. So let us learn from that and let God be God. And we just show up faithfully every day. Anyway, I'm really proud of you guys. I love you. Happy Friday. I hope you have a beautiful weekend. I hope you have an incredible week into next Friday when I get to see you again. And hey, before we go, can we actually do something really cool today? Can we show somebody how cool Jesus is? Can we walk more like him, talk more like him, be more like Jesus today? I love y'all and I will see you next time. Bye.