7 Ways to Crush Fear and Activate the Genius Within You | Ed Mylett

So, hey guys, I'm calling on all my friends here in the audience for a little bit of help. We're conducting an audience survey at gum.fm.slashmightlet. And we want to hear from you so we can make things here even a better experience for you and create content that you want. You know, we all know this, there's ads on our show, right? So we want to improve the experience, but in order to do that, we need to know a little bit more about you. So my friends in the audience, we want to improve that experience. So please help us. The survey is quick, easy, and it's a free way to support the show. If you'll take two minutes, you'll be helping us out so much by doing this. So go to gum.fm.slashmightlet to fill out our audience survey. That's g-u-m.f-m-slash-m-y-l-e-t-t. Welcome back to Max Out Everybody. What an honor it is to be with this gentleman here today and to share him with all of you. I guess probably the thing I admire most about him is that he came to this space, I think, similar to how I did, which is that almost reluctantly, he was a person building businesses and becoming successful in the real world, applying the things he was learning from personal development, and making those things a reality in his life. And then after he had business success, being sought after enough, he decided to start to teach the things that had helped him become successful. And I love that there's a track record behind the incredible things we're going to cover today. Multiple-time, New York Times bestseller, a company called Neurogym that you're going to fall in love with everybody, a bunch of different books. His recent one I read in two days called InterSize. I highly recommend you all get this. Most of you are probably familiar from him for the first time from The Secret. He's one of the stars, if not the star of The Secret. A bunch of different books. The answer, so many great things. And it's an honor to have him today because I consider him on earth one of, if not the greatest expert on the brain, on the inner mechanics of the brain, mindset, and peak performance. So I know that's what all of you want to talk about. So I have John Asraf here with me today. John, thanks for being here, brother. And it's so good to be here and thank you for giving me the honor to be here with you. Pleasure is mine, as you know. We're going to go right into the good stuff here with this man. There's too much gold there to kind of go to generalities. While we were doing this during the COVID pandemic and people will watch this at any given time. It could be two or three years from now. But I want to talk about fear to start. A lot of people are afraid right now. And whether they've lost a job and they're afraid it's not coming back, they've lost money, their business is going potentially backwards. Maybe they've lost the fitness they achieved and some of the weight they had lost has returned possibly. And in inner size, you teach these first two exercises. And if you could talk about take six, calm the circuits. If you would start, we're going right to the good stuff, right? Plus everyone's going to want to get the book after we do this. So could you talk about fear and some help that you could provide people in that regard? Sure. If everybody can imagine for a moment you're driving a car and everything's going great and all of a sudden a light pops up on your dash. Now the average person won't take a hammer and hit the light to turn it off. An average person will take a look at what is that light? Am I low on windshield wifes with fluid? Am I low on air? Am I tires? Is my back trunk open? What's going on? So just like the signal in a car is meant to make you aware, fear is a trigger in our subconscious mind that real or imagined danger has percolated in our brain. And so fear, there's nothing wrong with fear. We can actually use fear as fuel. Now I like to give people visual. So imagine if you have two parts of your brain. There's many more. But imagine these two. We have the Frankenstein brain and we have the Frankenstein brain. And when fear gets activated, let's assume that that's our Frankenstein brain going, what if? What if you get hurt? What if you lose money? What if you die? What if you get embarrassed, ashamed, ridiculed or judged? And so why does Frankenstein even get activated? Because we're not born with those fears. And so if we're not born with those fears, that means that something in our brain is triggering this reaction automatically without our thought. And that is what we call as the fear response. And we also know that that fear response causes something called the sympathetic nervous system to activate, which causes us to want to fight, freeze or run away. That's just the absolute reaction at a biological level of what is happening. Now when we want to deactivate that sympathetic nervous system, there's several, what I call our inner sizes that we can do that actually gives us more control, more power and the ability to reactivate the Einstein part of the brain. So inner size number one is really, really simple. It's called take six, calm the circuits. So as soon as you catch yourself in a state of doubt, fear, worry, anxiety, stress, that means that Frankenstein's activated. If you just took six deep breaths in through your nose as slowly as you could, and then you exhaled as if you're exhaling through a straw in your mouth. If you just did that six times, that very simple inner size would deactivate the Frankenstein brain and allow you to reactivate your thinking, imagination, Einstein part of your brain. And then you can do the second inner size, which puts you right back in control. And that one I call is AIA, which is now a matter of awareness, awareness of my thoughts, emotions, feelings, sensations, or the behaviors that I've just taken or the one I'm afraid to take. And in a pure state of awareness without judgment, blame, shame, guilt or justification. Let me repeat without any judgment, blame, shame, guilt or justification of the feeling or the thought of the behavior. Now I'm empowered again because now I can observe. And now in this observational mode, I could say, okay, what's my intention? Let's say for the next 10 minutes. Well, my intention is to be happy. Great. My intention is to be productive. Great. My intention is to take action on this one thing that's going to help me towards my goal and dream. So in the awareness and in the intention, then if I say, what's one small action step I could take towards what I want instead of what I don't want? So all of a sudden, I've interrupted a fear pattern. I've created this state of awareness. I've set an intention and now I'm taking action towards what I want versus being paralyzed by what I don't want and a fear that may or may not be real. So awareness is what actually gives us choice and choice is what actually gives us freedom if we make the right choices. So good. So guys, the reason I wanted John on was because these are actionable steps that you could take. You need to go get energized because these are actual exercises that will change your life. And I love how John arrived at this space. I want to go back because we just got pretty heavy there. And now I want to go to a little bit of a lighter space, but both of you and I have had mentors that have entered our life. We didn't come from perfect families, loving families, both of us, but not perfect families. And by the way, I don't know if that exists. Yeah. I think that a dysfunction is normal. Functional. That's normal. If you had a functional family, that's not normal. That's not normal. Right. And I guess to the extent that the dysfunction you experience is probably part of these things we have to undo. And we'll talk about beliefs in that regard in a minute, but you're this guy, Mr. Brown. I've heard about Mr. Brown for years, but it's hard to imagine a man who's become a multi-million. I mean, just so you know, John's built five, six different multimillionaire companies. One of them was on four billion in revenue. He's taken a company public on NASDAQ. It means I'm a very accomplished man here. But Mr. Brown was one of the catalysts for that. John was kind of a screwed up youth there for a while. He's taken some bad choices. And you have this moment where you're talking about goals with him. Yeah. And he asked this incredibly powerful question. And I mean, honestly, I've been in the space 30 years. I've worked on myself a great deal. I understand the mechanics of the mind, but sometimes the most basic things have the most deep impact on us in our lives. When I read this story, I must have told this story probably 35 times the last two weeks to people. So if you'd share that, I'd really appreciate it. So if the person watching or listening can imagine a 19 year old kid working in a shipping department of a warehouse, hating my job at $1.65 an hour back in 1980. This is April of 1980. On the side, I'm selling drugs. On the side, I'm doing breaking and entries. On the side, I'm part of a small little group of kids who got adept at shoplifting and doing all these stupid things as a kid. And I knew that my life was either going to, you know, I'm going to go to jail or the morgue at that time. One of the two is going to happen because we're doing some pretty, pretty heavy stuff at the time was just getting more and more and more advanced and more riskier. So my brother, who's a tennis pro and a coach at the time, asked me to come from Montreal to Toronto to meet one of his clients and his client's name is Mr. Almbraas. I took the train 350 miles for lunch with this guy and to see my brother for the weekend. As I went right from the train station to lunch, my brother introduced me to Mr. Brown. He's cordial, very, very nice man, very kind. He asked me, so what are some of your goals? I said, I'd love to buy a car. I'd like to move out of my parents house. I'd like to get a better job because I'm not making enough money doing that. And he says, well, I understand you're also getting yourself into a lot of trouble. I was like, oh yeah. Yeah, I am. I'm no embarrassed now that my brother told him all this. And he said, listen. He said, what are some of your bigger goals and dreams? I said, I don't know what you mean. He said, listen, having food on the table and wanting to buy a car and all that stuff, that's all nice and dandy. But what do you want to do with your life? And I have no idea, I said. And so he gave me this document as a sheet. It was the 1980 Goal Setting Guide. And on it said, at what age do you want to retire? How much net worth do you want to have? How much money do you want to make a year? What kind of lifestyle do you want? What kind of charitable things do you want to do? I'm like, what the F is this? I'm 19 years old. When do I want to retire? I want to get a damn good job. Forget about retire. He said, listen, take a few minutes and go and write this stuff out. So I sat there and I wrote, I want to retire at age 45. My net worth, I want it to be $3 million. I want to make $250,000 a year. I want to have Mercedes Benz. I want to house the beach. And I just started rifling off this stuff. And I gave him back the document. And he goes, these are really good ideas you had over here. So when did you get these ideas? I said, well, I like watching the TV show called Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. And Robin Leach shows all these nice homes, kind of like your lifestyle, Ed. And I said, I want that kind of a lifestyle. And he says, listen son, he says, all of this is possible. I'm going to ask you one question and the answer to this one question will determine whether you have it or you don't. And the back of my mind, I'm going, come on, give me a break. One question. I said, sure, Mr. Brown, fire away. So he says, are you interested in having this kind of lifestyle and achieving these things? Or are you committed? And I said, Mr. Brown, what's the difference? And he said to me, son, he says, if you're interested, you'll do what's easy and convenient. If you're interested, you'll allow your stories and your excuses and the fact you went to grade 11 and left school and the fact that your father's a cab driver and your mother's a seamstress at a store. You'll come up with all of the stories and reasons and excuses why you can't. He says, if you're interested, all of the obstacles will be bigger than your vision and your goals. He said, but if you are committed, you will do whatever it takes. You will upgrade your knowledge. You will upgrade your skills. You'll develop the beliefs and the habits to match the vision and the goals. He said, so son, which are you? And I said, a little scared. I said, well, Mr. Brown, I'm committed. And he just smiled. He reached out his hand to me and he says, in that case, son, I will be your mentor. Oh, boy, that's so good. And I was like, wow, that's great. What does that mean? He goes, well, I will teach you because I've made all of these goals that you want to have. I've already done those 10 times over. He says, the first thing I need you to do, I need you to move from Montreal where you live now to Toronto. And I said, move from Montreal to Toronto. I don't have a car. I don't have a job in Toronto. I gave him all these degrees. He said, stop. He says, there you go, already giving me excuses. I know, but this is the truth. You don't know. Right? He says, son, he says, here's your first lesson. First, you set the goal. You make a commitment to achieve the goal. Then you figure out how you're going to do it. So I said, fine, fine, I'll move to Toronto. And he says to me, great. The second thing I want you to do is on May the 5th, there's a new real estate class that starts. It's a five-week course, nine to five. I want you to enroll in it. It's $500. I said, excuse me? I said, $500. And you want me to go back to school? I failed English. I failed math. They kicked me out. I was happy. They were happier. I don't have the money. He says, there you go again. Look how fast you go back to your story. That's how I'm like, Mr. Brown, I'm not very smart in school. I didn't do well in school. And I started to give him the story again. Stop it. Are you interested or are you committed? I said, I already said I'm committed. He says, good. Then make the decision. We'll figure out all the rest afterwards. That was so good. Long story short, Ed. I made a commitment. I said, fine, I'll do it. My brother said, I'll lend you $100. I had $60 in the bank. Fell the way. My father lent me some money. My father lent me some money. May the 5th, 1980, 40 years ago, I got my first day in real estate school. Five weeks later, I passed the test. And somebody may have run out. How do you remember these dates so clearly? Yeah. 40 years ago. And the answer was, on June the 20th, 1980, I passed the test on my own. You remember that? Ed, I cheated to get out of high school. One of my friends gave me the answers to all 50 questions on a multiple choice so I could get out of high school. Amazing. Amazing. The first test I passed on my own. Here it is, 40 years later. And it affects you right now, telling that story. Yeah. It was the first time I felt proud. Wow, brother. Wow. You guys, 40 years later, millions of people helped. And it still affects this man to this day. And you should be asking yourselves right now, what a great story you guys are you interested or you committed? I made a video today. It's not going to be out for a couple of days. I made a video today about dreams. And I think people sometimes think, I don't have a plan so it disqualifies me from the dream. That's not the case. My biggest dreams, we always want to plan in a strategy. But my biggest dreams, I had no flipping clue how I was going to get to them. No clue. And what happened was, though, if I got committed to them instead of interested in them, the people, places, things, situations, circumstances begin to reveal themselves. And you find them. You attract them. It's part of the secret that I learned many years ago from some guy. Forget his name. There he is in front of me. So you're 100% right, guys. And so you got to ask yourself, are you interested or are you committed to what your dreams and your goals are? There's this thing. Dell PCs with Intel inside are built for the moments that matter, for the moments you plan and the ones you don't. Built for the busy days that turn into all night study sessions. The moment you're working from a cafe and realize every outlet's taken, the times you're deep into your flow, and the absolute last thing you need is an auto update throwing off your momentum. That's why Dell builds tech that adapts to the way you actually work. Built with long lasting batteries so you're not scrambling for the closest outlet. And built in intelligence that makes updates around your schedule, not in the middle of it. They don't build tech for tech's sake. They build it for you. Find technology built for the way you work at dell.com slash xps. Built for you. All right, I love when you guys send messages out on social media about the show. And lately, I've been getting a few of these messages about my wardrobe. I was wearing this sweater, this tan sweater. And I kept getting all these messages from guys going, where did you get that sweater, bro? So I'm going to tell you where I got it. I got it at Quince. A well-built wardrobe is about pieces that work together and they hold up over time. That's what Quince does best. Here's the most important part. It's affordable. Don't break the bank, right? Quince has the everyday essentials I love with quality that last. Organic cotton sweaters, polos for every occasion, lighter jackets that can keep you warm and changing seasons, everything for everybody. Okay, go check them out. Quince works directly with top factories, cuts the middlemen so you're not paying for brand markup. So, refresh your wardrobe with Quince. Go to quince.com slash ed for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash ed. Free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com slash ed. He touched on there about beliefs. It's another place where I consider you a guru is about the beliefs, the subconscious brain to the subconscious mind. There's a difference between those two things too, everybody, but you have this great thing where you took your real estate agents that were doing a certain level of production and you worked on their subconscious. So, tell them a little bit about that and then talk to us about beliefs. How powerful are they? What are they? Why do they matter? So, I'll start with the story first and then I'll share beliefs and then what to do so we have some practical things that you can start doing today. So, back in 1987 when I bought the franchise of rights for Remax of Indiana, I had no idea how to build a company. I was 26 years old, but I had another mentor who I invested $75,000 to become his partner, to have the opportunity to learn from this man who at the time was worth probably $100 million. And so, I was very, very keen on learning and I didn't know how to build a business. I didn't know anything other than how to sell real estate. And I set a goal to generate $1 billion a year in sales. And I set the goal for five years in the future, not knowing a billion dollar goal is like mind boggling big for me. And there was an interview, the second week I was in Indianapolis, I moved from Toronto to Indianapolis for this opportunity. And I was interviewed by the Indianapolis Business Journal and I said in the interview, that I was at a goal for a billion dollars. And the reporter said, are you aware that there's two companies that have been in the state of Indiana for 80 years, 100 years, the other one, and they haven't hit a billion dollars in real estate sales in all of these years. And I said, yeah, I know, it's Graves and Tucker and you can let them know that I'll be the first. And as I said that, I almost felt like I put my foot right in my mouth because I didn't know how I was gonna do it. Long story short, five years later, we sold enough franchise, recruited enough agents, we did $1.2 billion. And we were stuck, which is a great place to be stuck. And I was asking myself, how is it possible that I'm training these agents with strategies, with tactics, with selling skills, marketing skills. We were like the gurus of here's the books, here's the cassettes, here's the trainers, here's like out of the deep end, and the agents who, for example, would make $30,000 a year, kept making $30,000 a year. The agents who made 50 kept making 50, the agents who made 100 kept making 100. And so I realized that they weren't missing the skills or the knowledge, there was something else at play. And what helped me from the age of 19 to 27, 28, 30, was every single day, and I still do it today, and I'll share this with you in just a little bit, every single day I was priming my brain with the beliefs and the self-image required to achieve the goals that I wanted. So I got 75 agents together who agreed to pay $3,000 each to be part of an intergame training. Forget the outer game, the intergame training, we worked on affirmations, visualization, mindfulness, meditation, listening to our affirmations and our vision on our cassette recorders. We had, in the little cassettes we put in our cars, and so I had them work on their self-image and self-worth and self-esteem, and to develop the beliefs that we were gonna imprint or impregnate into their subconscious mind by listening to these audios every single day, twice a day, and while they were drying. And those 75 agents, over six months, increased sales by $100 million. My gosh. We didn't teach them one thing about selling more. Wow. We taught them about changing their identity and their belief structure so that it matched the goals they wanted to achieve. And then I said, holy shit, this works even for other people, not just me. So we started to teach that to all of our agents. And we created these cassettes with these recordings on them of the beliefs that we needed them to believe, the self-image that they deserved, that they were good enough, that they were smart enough. And we went from 1.2 billion to a 4.5 billion a year within four years. Wow. And that's my beliefs. And so guys, that's a belief. That's a little bit of beliefs and believing in a new self-image and identity and a new story. Gosh, so good. Are you gonna tell us about beliefs, what they are? So if you think, yeah, so when you were born, were you born with any beliefs? No. Were you born with any habits? No. Were you born with any fears? No. No. So from a neuroscience and neuropsychology perspective, a belief is nothing more than this. Imagine that you're born and your brain's made up of about 100 billion marbles. And every time you have an experience or somebody says something to you or you read something or you watch something, these marbles make these connections. And the connections that are reinforced go from conscious connections to subconscious connections. And once these subconscious connections are made and reinforced, they run the show 98% of the time. So a belief is nothing more than a reinforced pattern in the brain. And our conscious brain can choose what we want when we're in that part of our brain, but our subconscious mind can't choose its program from the age of zero to three in the imprinting years, three to about seven or eight, the modeling years, and then eight on, it's the experiential years. And so if you have these powerful beliefs that you're good enough, you're smart enough, you're worthy to achieve the goals that you have. If you have these powerful beliefs, you are able to achieve any amount of income, you choose no matter what the amount is, you just need to learn how. So if you have these empowering beliefs, you have brain coherence between conscious and subconscious. What if you said, okay, I wanna make, let's just say $100,000 a year or a million, it doesn't make a difference. And I asked you, what do you need to believe about yourself to achieve it? So I need to believe I'm smart enough, good. Write down I am smart enough. What else do you need to believe? I need to believe that I am worthy, I need to believe that I deserve this, I need to believe that it's possible, I need to believe you write down five or six or seven beliefs that are just words on a sheet of paper. Now let me stop for just a moment, I'm gonna tell a story and come back to this. I want you to imagine that somebody tapped you on the shoulder sometime today and say, hey, I work with Steven Spielberg and Tom Hanks in Hollywood, and we have this new script, okay, that if you get really good at this script where you could read it in front of a camera without the script, we'll pay you 10 million bucks. Now I want you to imagine you've never seen the script, you don't know how to act, but they said to you, we're gonna give you an acting coach, we're gonna give you everything you need to memorize the script, we're gonna give you everything you need to act it perfectly. What would you do to take that script that's on a piece of paper that you've never seen before, what would you do to take that script to make it yours for you to own it? And the answer is you probably read it like what, once? Would you read it maybe a hundred times, 200 times, 500 times? Do you think you might role play with somebody while you're holding the script in your hand? Do you think you might research the role? Do you think you might take a camera and practice it? And do you think that if you practice it one time, 50 times, 100 times, 500 times, you can finally put the script down and you can get in front of the camera and go, boom, here is the script. You think you could do that? Well, guess what? A script that's on a piece of paper that you don't believe with practice, you start to believe. So what happens if you take a belief system and you start to imprint it into your subconscious mind initially through conscious repetition, but there are ways to access the subconscious mind that we know today that are faster and easier than just doing it consciously. And so you take a vision of you achieving your goals and dreams, you take the beliefs you need, you learn how to manage your emotions a little bit better, and then you develop the habits which again, are nothing more than neural patterns in the brain that have been reinforced. And when you learn how to deactivate the destructive ones and activate constructive ones through space repetition and reinforcement, now you are resetting your default way of being. So a belief is nothing more than a reinforced pattern that if you learn how to deactivate it and create a new one, it's like a software upgrade for your brain. Wow, so guys, what he didn't say, so good, John, thank you. Guys, this is stuff that you pay thousands of dollars for, but you can by the way, get in his book and you get here, because I know him for free. But guys, what he didn't say is beliefs are necessarily true. No, thank you for the truth. And this is important, you know, I've told you many times, everybody, that your thoughts aren't necessarily true. Your beliefs are not necessarily true. They're patterns reinforced over time. And so if you could create this new script that's reinforced these patterns over time, that's a conscious way of doing it. Give us one key, he said, we know now there's subconscious ways to do it that are faster and more powerful. Give us one that is a new hack to do this. So one that everybody's heard of and very few people do, unless you're a professional athlete, astronaut, or Navy SEAL is visualization. Yes, thank you. Simple, simple, simple. I know you had Phil Mickelson on in the past and I'm watching. And if you think about visualization is simulation. Now, here is the difference. Whoa, that's good. Okay, go ahead. So visualization is simulation. So when we close our eyes, or even if our eyes are open and we start to use our Einstein brain, the imagination, we now have just activated one of the biggest centers of our brain, the occipital lobe that's connected to the motor cortex. It's connected to the motivational circle, the nucleus commensate releases that dopamine that makes you feel good, that makes you wanna take action. So if you visualize yourself achieving the goal, if you visualize yourself behaving in ways that match the new belief, if you even visualize the words, or you take the words on a sheet of paper and you read them, run your right finger across it, run your left finger across it, close your eyes, see it and feel it, your brain is creating a mental movie with the words. And as it creates a mental movie with the words, that's happening in your subconscious mind. And when you give the subconscious these instructions, a couple of things happen because of the way the brain hierarchy works. Number one, it's survival, but then number two is safety, and then number three is energy conservation. Now when you do something 20, 30, 40, 50 times, it takes about 66 days to 365 days of repetition to override an old habitual circuit, not 10 days, not 21 days, 66 to 365. So if you visualize yourself achieving the goal, feeling the success that you wanna feel, seeing the belief on the screen of your mind, you are actually creating a neural network through the science of neuroplasticity, and the networks that you reinforce become the most dominant networks. And since your brain wants to conserve energy, if you do this on a consistent basis, your brain says, okay, you're doing this so often, let me just make this automatic, let me set aside the old beliefs, let me replace it with a new beliefs, and now you've deliberately and consciously evolved yourself. My gosh, so guys, it's patterns. John, thank you. It's patterns. Guys, John used a word earlier which was coherence, and it can fly by. But when you've done this hard work, and I say fun work, by the way, on your subconscious brain, on your subconscious mind, what happens is now when you set that ambitious goal, there's a coherence between what's lying underneath you and what's on the surface. And that's why you know people, you all have someone you know, that boy, when they point their mind at something, it's almost like a weapon. When they point themselves at a dream, they draw it towards them. Part of that's energy, part of that's vibration, but a big part of that is coherence in your brain. And so you've gotta do this difficult work that you might think is difficult, which by the way, is fun, is easy, and it's really just a matter of patterns, and taking control of your life, taking control of the things you do, you can literally, everybody, change your life. You can change the external parts of your life by changing the internal or the inner sizes that he teaches part of your life. That's why I do this show, is what we're gonna talk about. Can I just take you back on something? Please. Since you picked up on the word coherence, and you mentioned the law of attraction earlier, for the people who think that the law of attraction is, you know, think, believe in your achieve, first I'm gonna tell you that's bullshit. So let's call it a day. I love this man. I love it. Bullshit. But I want you to think of your brain a little bit briefly, and think of it this way. Let's say you love rock and roll. And let's say rock and roll's on station 95.5. If you're on station 92.1, that might be classical. If you're on station 98.7, that might be punk rock. But at 92.5, that's rock and roll. So imagine coherence just means locking your electromagnetic spectrum of your brain. Lock it and load it on exactly what you want. So what's the vision? What's the goal? What are the beliefs? What are the emotions that create coherence so you're locked and loaded to the frequency of the universe that is matching that goal? Part one, part two, is when you get locked and loaded, you've actually activated the Einstein brain, connected to the motor cortex, connected to the dopamine release in your body. And when that happens, okay, now you're in coherence, but there's another part that happens in this Einstein part of the brain. That's actually what the latest neuroscientists and psychologists are thinking is connected to this GPS part of our brain, to the frequency of where all of the tools, resources, people are that resonate with that frequency. So we've been evolving for what, two and a half million years since homeorectis to now 108 billion humans on earth with a brain that's been changing and growing. And my belief is we're just scratching the proverbial surface. When we talk about, you know, a little quantum mechanics or quantum physics with entanglement, how we're all connected, where all tuning into the frequencies that are us and within us and all around us, now when we learn to use our brain better, it's just mind-boggling how we can achieve goals and dreams that we thought were impossible to achieve before. This is the fun part now. So you know how when you're doing something that's good for you and then you stop doing it, all of a sudden you feel, what the heck changed? 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So, you know, we talk a lot on this show often about health and energy, vitality, strength, wellness. You know what it comes down to more than anything I found out after about a thousand interviews? Food, like what you're putting in your body. You cannot out train a bad diet. What it really comes down to is what you're eating. And you know what, we all wanna eat home cooked food. That's why I love HelloFresh. And it's delicious food. Like I never had any more healthy food in my life that tastes this good. They got 35 high quality protein, different meals. You got GLP one friendly ones. You got Mediterranean. They got all wholesome ingredients. None of the bad stuff that you put in food. But the other thing that I like about them is, you know what, you can get seafood on there now for no upcharge. There's three times the amount of seafood on there. My favorite, by the way, is the ribeye. So go to hellofresh.com slash my let 10 FM to get 10 free meals plus a freeze willing knife, which is $144 value on your third box. Offer a valid, well supplies last, free meals applied as discount on first box. New subscribers only varies by plan. Hey, this is the fun part. And by the way, when you see two people that are vibrating it, frequency like this, you get an interview like what you're experiencing right now, everybody. Like we both have done lots of interviews and we know when we're in the midst of a great one. And everyone, I just wanna be clear, please follow John. Please, and if you're listening to this show or watching it, share my show. My gosh, people need to know this. You know someone you care about or believe in or love that should be hearing these things. Couple more tips. And then I wanna talk about something pretty serious at the end if you don't mind. Because you're just such a treasure. But one of the ways that you can do some of this work, many of you know about vision boards and we can have a competent person talk about it. John, I can have you touch on that a little bit. But John goes even deeper into these accomplished boards, I think you call them. And he's got a crap board, which I've never flipping heard of in my life. And again, guys, you're just not gonna get this anywhere else. So could you just, these are strategies that are real, that work, that we both do. So there's two prolific entrepreneurs who are now in this space that are saying, these are the things we do. And isn't it ironic that we both do them. And we're both addicted to them. And we both attribute it to our success. So please talk about that, brother. So I have my vision boards and I actually have my exceptional life blueprint that I've created. It's about 50 pages of my prayers, my rituals, for my spiritual growth, health, wealth, my money story, my inner mission, my outer mission. You know, some of the stuff, you know, either that I have or that I'm creating. And so I create these visual representations to trigger the biggest part of my brain called the occipital lobe and to activate my memory center. So I have vision boards for what I want to create. So I'm giving my brain the exact instructions so that not only it focuses helping me achieve that, but most people don't understand about vision boards or creating goals in writing that are specific is that your brain is a deletion and distortion tool as well. So if you give your brain instruction, this is the stuff that's important to me for health, God, spirituality, charity, fun, experiences, my children, my mother, my father, my son, whatever it is. And you say, this is what I want to trade my life for. Delete and distort everything else. Now all of a sudden you're using your brain as a deletion and distortion organism in order to be able to help you hyper focus on what you want. So part one is get absolute clarity on what you want so your brain helps you eliminate what you don't want. Part one, part two, right? Part two is I tend to be a goal-seeking guy, right? And I used to not celebrate the small stuff. And I used to just like, you know, find a bigger goal, bigger goal, bigger goal, more bigger, bigger. And somebody says to me like, are you gonna like slow down just to enjoy some of the stuff that you actually have done for yourself or for people in your family? And I was like, well, let me create an accomplished board. So good, so good. Right, so I'm gonna accomplish board. So accomplished board, you passed that test on your own 40 years ago. Celebrate that. You helped this person who was challenged. And celebrate that. You know, you did this for him or for her or for yourself. Celebrate that stuff to remind yourself as I'm tough on myself. Like I'm, like, come on, let's go. It's a goal, let's go. And sometimes I forget the stuff that I have done, the stuff that I do do, that I need to remember. So I create an accomplished board and a list. So I can just go to it when I feel like, holy shit, am I smart enough to achieve that next thing? Am I good enough? What a lot of people don't know at is, when I was a kid, I used to feel like I wasn't smart enough. And when I was a kid, it helped me back. And today I still feel like I'm not smart enough and that fuels me to get smarter. So I use it. I set big goals, like, oh, God, I don't have the skills, I don't have the knowledge, but I can figure it out. I've got contacts, I've got friends, and there's books, there's Google, there's YouTube, there's Holy Mackerel. I don't need to have all the specialized knowledge anymore. So I have accomplished what we also, you know, crap board is what conflicts are happening right now. I often say that there's only four things that are holding you back as a human being. Only four, there's not 25, there's four that are the core. One is if your vision and goal is bigger than your self-image. Okay, so if you feel you deserve it, you can have this vision and goal and be excited about it and motivate about it. You will not do what it takes to achieve. One, two, if you have limiting beliefs, if you have a vision and goal, but you have a limited belief that you're too young, too old, whatever the case is, your limited beliefs will drive your behavior. Three, fear. Fear of being embarrassed to shame, ridiculed to judge. Fear of failure, fear of disappointment. And we'll talk about disappointment or fear of succeeding and failing again. Disappointment. Most, and then the fourth one, by the way, is you're lacking the knowledge and skill required. So that actually sets up a self-doubt trigger which activates the Frankenstein brain which causes you to lose motivation. But most people prefer to master disappointment in comfort zones instead of mastering change. So if I master disappointment, I know what I got. I just have to deal with, well, okay, this is what I got. And if I master my comfort zone, then at least this is the devil I know. Yes. Versus mastering change and we know what's going on in our brain, we know what's happening, neurologically, biology, emotionally, physically, and all of that is a skill. It's just a skill. So why not just master change? Why not become an adaptationist right now in the time that you need it the most in the world? Because if you don't, then you're just gonna keep repeating the same patterns that are gonna get reinforced and it makes it harder in three months, six months and six years. So master change now and make that one of your core competencies and then you master your life. Oh my gosh, you guys, anybody familiar with my work know how much I love this man and how much we line up on these things similarly. I love the way that you phrase things. And guys, one thing about change, one of the reasons we hesitate to change as humans is it's an energy depletion too. Humans kind of want to conserve energy. You have to realize one thing everywhere, then we're gonna go to one more part and then I'm gonna ask you about grief. But guys, we love to gravitate towards what we're most familiar with. We create these patterns in our life and we repeat them over and over and over again. And if you're not conscious of what they are, if you don't create new ones, you're just repeating the same life in a different year over and over. And that script that John talked about, your script is the same as it was five years ago, 10 years ago, 20 years ago, with slightly different characters and slightly different dressings in the room. Very short intermission here folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest. Welcome back to the show everybody. I'm so excited about today because the woman sitting across from me is the definition of brilliant. Oh, you're sweet. It's just true. And she is always the smartest person in the room and never feels the need to prove it to you. And that's the real definition of humility and brilliance combined. She's a cognitive neuroscientist and a true mental health expert and her works made a huge impact in my life. The last time she was on the show, you guys went crazy because of how detailed her messaging is and her content is. And so Dr. Caroline Leif, thank you for being here today. Oh Ed, thank you so much for that lovely introduction. I'm very, very, very flattered, very honored. Thank you. And I love talking to you. It's always just, you're an amazing interviewer. Thank you. You pull the best out of me. Well, I love listening to you. She also has a new book out that you can pre-order right now depending on when you listen to it, but you can order it at any time. But how to help your child clean up their mental mass, a guide to building resilience and managing mental health. What is, you wrote this for how to help your child, but when I'm reading the work, I'm like, this helps humans, right? That's what it is. In general. So what is something, a strategy, you said awareness of the thought helps it lose its power over you. I'm using my description of it, right? So I've always said that, now I know why. Yes. Okay, what is something a tactic or a strategy or a technique that somebody can use for their child or themselves that can help this in these 63 days that you would be proposing they do? Okay, so what you do is you do the five steps of the neuropsychal, because what I did was strategically look over the years at how can you actually find the signals and do this whole deconstruction, reconstruction thing. So you can't do it in one shot. So what you wanna do is do a neuropsychal, which is five steps. What are they? And I'll go through this in a moment, but you're gonna do five steps in the sequence. The first part of the sequence is the first more or less three weeks where you go through the five steps in around 15 to 45 minutes, not more and not less. Then the second 42 days where you're stabilizing, you just do it in five minutes. So the five steps are basically gathering awareness. And notice I say gathering. So it's a very conscious and deliberate. It's not like a mindfulness awareness, which this is beyond that. So when we talk about mindfulness, meditation, breathing, decompression, all of those are very important to prepare the brain. So what you would do before you dive into the neuropsychal, and you'll see this in my box and in my app. I've got an app as well called the neuropsychal. There's a two to three minute brain preparation, which could be anything from focusing on momentary to doing a seven, three, 10 breathing exercise. So it's something to just get the neurophysiology under control. Then you all could be a meditation, a prayer, whatever. Then you move into the actual work. And I'm about to slip off this chair. Okay, go ahead. Then you move into the work, it's so into this, into the work of gather awareness step one. So gathering awareness is a very specific process. Everything's very layered. Your mind, brain connection, psycho neurobiology, mind, brain, body. I'm actually a psycho neurobiologist to study that connection is very ordered and sequenced and structured. And if you want something to change, you've got to follow the steps of the order. So the neuropsychal is a system in that you can put CBT techniques. You can put prayer, you can put whatever works for you, but put them in the right step. So when we gather awareness, we are gathering like gathering apples off a tree. We're not just randomly looking at things. You're very organized. Okay, what am I going to gather awareness of my emotions? I'm feeling depressed. I'm feeling anxious. I'm feeling frustrated, whatever. Just label them. What am I, what related to that emotion? What am I doing? What are my behaviors? What am I doing? What am I saying? How am I doing and saying them? So maybe it's depression and maybe it's withdrawal. Then the third thing is you're going to say, how do I feel in my body when I'm feeling depressed and withdrawing? Maybe cardiovascular issues, part-pulpitating. And then fourth category is, how am I looking at life in this moment? As I feel depressed, gut ache and withdrawing, I feel that life sucks. Very simple example, those are four signals. So you go at step one is to gather those four steps. Two is to ask why? Okay, you're going a little deeper. Why am I feeling these emotions? And you're not solving the whole problem. Don't try and solve it in one day. Just go as much as you can handle. It's very draining. So that's why I say limit. So it's why am I having this? Maybe I'm having this depression. I seem to be having it because of, it's happening a lot. I'm not sure why, but it's happening five times a day or it's feeling, or it's happening once a week. Oh, if it is once a week, what am I having the same behavior? Why am I getting that? Why am I doing that with drawing? How often am I with doing? What other things am I doing? Why do I think I'm doing that? So you work through each of those signals and try and get some more. Don't stay too long on those two steps and then you write. Now you don't journal, you write, you dump. You literally dump what you've gathered awareness of and what you have reflected on. Because the first step was to gather awareness. The second step was to do this reflection thing. And then you dump it down on, and literally I mind it, just write it all over the page. I've developed a system called the Metacog. And for kids, it's the bubble cog. And it's basically writing in a way that looks like a tree. So it's starting from the middle and it's working around in circles and branches and colors and arrows and everything's connected. Everything's either on a line in a bubble. If you don't like doing that, just write any old way. But try to write dimensionally. Don't do it in lines. Try and just put it all over the page. Because it forces the two sides of the brain to work together. Creates a very strong connection between the conscious and the subconscious through the bridge of the subconscious. And it starts diving deep. I mean, I can tell you now that when I worked with patients that who had symptoms of schizophrenia, this is an extreme example, but just to show you how all this works, we would have them just basically metacog out with all these steps I'm going through. And they would have one whole personality on the side and that continuing the same conversation and another whole. So you'd see the shift and then we could show them, hey, look what's going on. And from there we could unpack and find roots and things like that. So it's phenomenal in getting insight. Now you spoke about introspection earlier on. Introspection, insight, it means diving into the depths of the unconscious. That's the most intelligent part of us. So it's writing part of step two or is that step three? Step three. So writing is step three. Sorry, gather awareness. Step one, reflect step two, writing step three. You're bringing order out of chaos. You're getting, those three steps are taking a deeper, deeper, deeper, getting increasing your introspection, insight, pulling up things that are associated. Now that is things all over the page. A lot of it makes sense. Things may shock you that come out. Day one, not really, but as you progress through the days, more and more will come up. And for example, around day seven, people start saying, oh, I never saw this connection. Day 14, like insight, insight into, oh, that's associated with that. I didn't see that. This is why I'm doing this. So there's tremendous growth. If you don't force it, you just go through the cycle. I don't want to interrupt you, but I want to ask you, do you think during that awareness and the writing and that you are uncovering some of the things that may trigger you as well? Totally. So it's step four. Excellent question. Which step four is looking at what you've gathered, awareness reflected on and written. You look, what are my triggers? What are the patterns? This has happened. What can I do? So step four is moving towards reconceptualization, reconstruction, healing, putting food on the plant, food on the roots to heal them. It's leading to that acceptance. You're not going to know why someone wrapped a child, why someone did this. That's their story. But that's your story. So you need to find out, I'm not crazy. I don't have a broken brain. I'm not genetically flawed. I don't have a mental illness. I'm showing up like this because of what happened to me. I can't answer why I have to get to a certain level of acceptance, but at least I know why. It's because of, and that helps you heal and move forward. So it's very progressive. It's not walking in circles, round and around and around. This is where you can bring in things like, there's also a dynamic theory and AC. There's a lot of different therapy techniques that people can bring in experiences from EMDR and into all these, because this is a system. Yeah, into these spaces. What's the fifth step? The fifth step is an action, active reach. So you're going to, from the triggers and things like that, you want to move towards an antidote for today, an action for today. So what can I do today to keep me in a safe space? I've done the work for today. I'm not going to fall back into working on this anyway. I've got to get going through the day. And also your brain and mind need a rest. They get tired. So it's an action. It's like a visualization, a statement, a combination, a little pre, an affirmation. So this is where you would fit an affirmation or a CBT type technique, like maybe a little visualization exercise. Or so it's something that you do and say, maybe something as simple as, I can do this. I don't know how. And then visualize a rainbow. I mean, it could be something as simple as that to an actual little technique or it could be a breathing technique. So it's an action that keeps you going through the day, which helps you focus on the fact that you are moving towards healing. So you're removing energy from this thing because this process has brought this from the non-conscious to the conscious and it's weakened these branches. In the non-conscious, it's strong and driving. When the non-conscious and conscious are working together, then this is weakened, the protein branches, the chemicals. So I can start restructuring and reorganizing. See what I'm thinking when you're doing this. Because this applies to two different people. So everybody stay in here. So those are the five steps to sort of begin to rewire yourself or change your brain. The other part of me listening to this is if you're thinking, I really don't have a lot of these issues of anxiety or worry, depression. I also think that's the formula to create a change. Like if I had a goal and ambition, I'd become aware of what I wanted. I'd have all these reflections about it. I would then write about it. So, and I like the idea of it not being linear like a book, but actually all over the place. So there'd be like, that's almost like a dream personal vision board or dream board that you're doing. Then I'd think about what were the triggers I need to create to generate this state. Could be snapping my fingers. It could be seeing somebody. It could be walking into my office. It could be getting into my car. It could be a particular person. So I'd use that trigger to then create that state. And then obviously the fifth would be, what's an action that I can take towards this stuff? You've got it. So that cycle can be used to uncover trauma, reverse trauma, create brain health, but can also be a creative process in order to change your life. So you are brilliant because that's exactly where I started my research. 38 years ago with people with traumatic brain injuries and learning disabilities and people that just wanted to improve their life. They just wanted, and it's called brain building. So it's the neuro-cycle that was the first iteration of this thing was to develop brain building. So it was helping kids learn. So getting data in as opposed to deconstructing, it was constructing. So it's taking from the knowledge in education, school to learn for an exam. Or what is the goal in your vision? So that's the brain building aspect of the neuro-cycle. This is huge right here. I gotta tell you something because everyone always wants to create changes. They're like, all right, do I get a vision board out? Like do I? So this is a five step process. It actually does it. To actually do it. And to do it reinforcement. And by the way, in 63 days. Exactly. You're a different human being. Totally different. You're from a visualization techniques. So share this with you and then maybe you can speak to why it might work. So everyone asked me, I don't visualize very well. Yes you do. You just need to get quiet. And it's a muscle you build. When you decide to start visualizing your life, it is difficult. But one thing I've done is I've created, I teach it to a lot of my athletes is, I use what I call a highlight reel technique. So what I actually start with is I start, I've never said this on the show because it's part of my private work. But I want you to speak to it. I actually start by visualizing memories from my life that are highlights. So it could be, for example, the birth of my son, the birth of my daughter, a home run I hit in baseball, an award I got, a sale that I closed that was important. These are things my brain are already familiar with, to your point earlier. It's already been wired. I've already repeated the emotion. It's already in there. And so I see those things and those are easy for me to recall because they're familiar. And then I move to what I want. So my brain, I think, begins to think they're one big highlight reel. Is there any data to prove that that's true? Meaning I'm already visualizing what I've already, something I want. I've seen an achievement. I've seen an achievement. And then I see the one that I want to achieve. And for me, my brain more easily sees the future when I start with things that I'm already familiar with in my past. Because I think we do that in reverse. So if we've had a traumatic, someone's hurt us in our life. We see this, we repeat it over and over. And then we then regenerate it in our real life with the next relationship. And that's why people end up dating the same person over and over again in a different body. Exactly. Right. Exactly. Okay, so I'm jumping out of my chair with excitement because you've said exactly the correct thing. So what you've just described, you remember I said a moment ago, if you have, I said, spoke about how I'll recall this conversation because it's a great conversation and I'll build it. That's what we're talking about here. So you are recalling these. You're recalling those and you're using those to unmask your natural resilience. Yes, that's exactly right. So I actually call these insurance policies. Okay. So they literally, so when I work with a person to actually be able to build their brain, we're building an insurance policy. So you should be spending time on doing exactly that. So as you do that, you activate a whole different way that your energy flows across the two sides of your brain. You go into the highest level of intelligence, you unmask resilience, you increase your wisdom, you tune into the depths of your unconscious where intelligence, pretty much your intelligence resides. Because your conscious is basically a workhorse and it's guided by your non-conscious. So what we've got to see is what is dominant in the non-conscious. Now your non-conscious is a gentle lady, gentle man. And it's basically always looking for the things that are blocking this growing and keeping you stuck in those. So it's on your side. But you have to tune in to what's coming up. So when you describe, when you wanna do something difficult, you first think of something good. What you've done is you've listened to wisdom from your non-conscious, which is that process. You've then called those up, you've activated your resilience, you've put yourself in a highly intelligent wire state. Now you're in a state that's more able to cope with that. So when I work with a patient, for example, I would never start with that. I would say, okay, let's talk about your favorite moments or you tell me a story about, tell me a great movie. Let's talk about a great book, anything, and then you would focus on that. When they were in that state, I knew that I had got the mind-brain connection, this psycho and your ability. I feel like thinking about the things that have been positive in my life or experiences creates a neurochemistry to which I can create out. That's exactly what you do. Yes, you have. You've changed all the flow. You've, these change what we, they increase gamma, which is a wave that you want to flow. And when your eyes are open, you want like, what we call low gamma across the whole brain. And then there's certain other patterns. I don't want to go into the details. And that's got to go into have a certain beta pattern those energy waves, when they are flowing in that state, they activate the different parts of the brain to then be on high alert to respond and do what they designed to do, which then impacts your neurochemistry, then your endocrine system, your cardio, everything then comes together. And you are in this prime state, your HPA axis is now on high alert and you now are in the ideal state for solution finding. This is so good. You guys, this is why I do the show right here. So let me just give you this again. Step one, gather awareness, step two, reflect. Step three, right play draw. Step four, recheck. Step five, active reach, which is basically what we've been describing here. What about physical movement and brain health? And it's not in here, but I want to ask you about that. I find that my anxiety and depression and concern and worry or angst is often something physically I'm doing. I feel like there's a physical nature to it. And I have found that when I change my physiology, I tend to feel like I've changed, maybe your physical body is your unconscious mind. I don't know, I'll let you answer this, but when my body begins to move in a certain way, I have found that to be a pathway out of some of the negative emotions that I'm feeling. And I'm wondering, even with children, is part of the mental health issues we're seeing that they're less and less active physically, meaning a lot more video gaming, right? A lot more stuff on their phone, a lot more stuff on their Mac or their iPad. Whereas when I was a kid, I'm sure mental health issues were very prevalent, but we were outside playing. We were playing football, we were running around, we were running, there was nothing to do inside, right? So we were outdoors more. And I know that's not really part of what we're talking about here, but I'm just curious. Is it related? No, it's totally related. And part of, you'll see in the, in my books, in my Neuropsychal app, where all these steps are the Neuropsychal app, I literally walk you through the process. And in the children's book, the active reaches, I encourage that physical activity. I encourage, and you'll see throughout the actual five steps you can bring in the physical activity in different ways. So basically your body, your mind stores in three places. Mind, which is all around you, these gravitational fields and so on. Brain, the trees, but in the body and the cells. So therefore you, that's why we have body memory. That's why when you have to recall something that you get your body response as well. So that body response is really important. Like for example, if you're trying to get your children to talk off to school and they don't want to talk and let them have a little rest, but go for a walk, start doing something. And the action activates and releases. So it's not that the non-conscious is the body, it's that the non-conscious is operating the body. It's your driving system, it's mind driving. So your non-conscious is the thing that's always using every part of you. Your mind, brain and body are on your side. They're all, we have this intent, this psychoneurobiological link that is our superpower that literally when we understand how to read it, we can move forward. So you explained, you said that if you feel angst, you can feel your body feeling it. Angst, emotional warning signal. Your body feeling it, physical warning signal. You're probably not totally focused initially on your behaviors and your perspective. Then you move, as you move, you start unlocking and getting an idea of, and that's put under the behavioral signal as well. Then it starts unlocking the others and you start getting into that space where you can work on going through this process. And then you can fit movement in anyway. The reason I feel so big about physical stuff and brain mental health is like, take your spouse for a second. You think about the moments of your life that you feel the most connected. Let's just be honest, a lot, some of it can be your sexual time with that. Why what's happening? Something physical's happening between the two of you. When I wanna open up, and like with my children or something like that, when I really want to get them to talk, you're so brilliant because I found, putting them on the couch or sitting on their bed is okay, but if we take a walk, we take a walk to your point, we're changing something there. Even laying on the couch with your spouse watching Netflix when they're actually touching each other and laying on each other compared to when, they're on one side of the couch and you're on the other. There's a deeper connection when something physical's involved. Exactly. The other part of it that you write about in the book that I've never really looked at before, and you talk about this particularly with children. So the book is written, Dr. Lee's books have been for everybody. This one's more specifically guided towards children, but really everything in there. Parents for children. Parents help parents help their children. Yeah, parents and children, right. But sleep, so if you have a child or yourself, because I know this is true with me, when I'm not sleeping, something's not so good with me typically, right? But it's interesting to me, I never thought about sleep when it came to my children. If they're not sleeping, that's probably an indicator or something, so talk about sleep and children and even how it relates to each of us individually. Absolutely, well, what I've tried to do in this book is to try and find the things that are not hot back and topics, to try and help parents have a, and to teach the neuropsychology in such a way that it's super simple, it's very practical, whatever. So I take areas like trauma, sleep, et cetera, I'm glad you've mentioned the sleep because there's so much scariness around sleep too, because you go to a doctor, one of the first things they'll say about, is your child sleeping? Are you sleeping? And they have to sleep or they're gonna die, it's not quite that extreme, but it's very fear-mongering. And yes, there is a valid point to sleep, sleep is very important, but how many hours of sleep a person should sleep in a day, we don't actually know. Really? And also people have different patterns of sleep. So this thing that your child must sleep eight hours a day is, not necessarily true. So yes, exactly. But if your child isn't sleeping, and there is a persistent pattern of bad sleep, there's something going on, that's definitely would be classified under your behavioral warning signals, and it's worth investigating. And that's why I actually put sleep neuropsychals into the book on things, there's different ones that you can do, because preparing yourself for sleep starts when you wake up in the morning. You know, it's like when you wake up in the morning, the first thing is as the chemistry starts to readjusting so that you can become conscious, at that moment to train yourself to just, what are my four signals? What am I feeling? Am I complaining? Am I feeling sad? Am I complaining? Well, quickly assess, do a quick assessment of your four signals. So it's what are my emotions? What am I, what's my body doing? What are my behaviors in this moment? Like I know I'm lying in bed, but am I tense? And what's my perspective? I don't wanna do today. If you can catch that, takes you, those four things can take you 10 seconds and can really, really prepare you for a night's sleep. It sets you into it. Open your mind that you can actually then face the day. So that's one thing you can do. I've got a whole thing there that you can do a sleep neuropsychal for children as they wake up. Then if you see there's a pattern of children not sleeping, it's to find a time during the day that's a good time. Either early evening when they've been to school, they've had dinner, they've played, that's sort of a good time to kind of work around, but you can find, don't do this when they exhaust it. And then you can do a whole neuropsychal to try and work through what the cause could be. When we don't sleep, the main reason we don't sleep, and a lot of people will maybe not agree with me here, but the main reason we don't sleep is because we have unresolved issues that we all have. I sure agree. It changes your energy in your brain and your brain, all the things, the melatonin and other things, because there's so many cases, and I actually give a case in the study in the book of it's very, you know, quite a traumatic situation of a child who was abused physically and sexually from three months of age, but just could not sleep through the night. And they did everything, all the sleep aids, all the white noise, everything you can possibly do. And not that those don't work, they are definitely gonna facilitate and help. But the core issue was the child's abuse, and the impact of that, although the child was out of that unsafe environment, that you had to deal with what was going on, and that child was very young. So once the parent just happened to come across my stuff and do the neuropsychal, and the child's like to the parent doing it, and sort of doing it, and within four days this child was sleeping. Now this was an eight year old, they didn't use this book, because this book wasn't out yet. The child sort the mom was doing, sort the change in the mom, because the kids watch us, and this was an eight year old, and said, I wanna do what you're doing. And so she adapted it as best she could, and this child started sleeping within four days. So the core issue there was a trauma that was unresolved, and you said it to yourself, I know, I do. If I've got something that I haven't dealt with, or something's worried me, or I have that phone call before bed, that's it, my sleep's gone until I've dealt with it. Can I give you one with children that I think is unsaid? And I know you're such a person of faith, so I'm gonna give you what helps me sleep. And it leads to this unresolved stuff. And I just wanna say this to everybody, it's prayer. And let me say why. So prayer at night is a chance for me to take my burdens and put them on my higher power, in my case Jesus, but whatever your faith is. And I know you share my faith. And I wonder how many people are praying with their children at night, because this is an opportunity for your children to probably open up. I think it's an opportunity for them to relieve themselves of their burdens. And I have found that when I have really deep, beautiful prayer, even if it's brief, that I sleep better at night, because there's a perspective that I get that I'm protected. And I really wonder that. The second thing is, I wanna ask you about both these. So this is for adults, but it also affects our children. More and more our children are on their screens late at night. I know this is just a brain issue. So it's not necessarily trauma, but there's all this data about blue screen time and how it's difficult to sleep. I don't know if it's accurate or not, but I know when you're doing homework, it's stressful. I think people let their children do their homework too late at night. And now that's a problem. Now it's a stressor. Now it's a trauma. Also they're on their screen. And a lot of these schools put so much homework on their children, this is being real. It's like a real thing. Yeah, the school system's a problem. So when your kids get home from school, wouldn't it be smarter to get them A to start doing their homework earlier so they're off of their screens and away from stressful stuff before sleep? Also true for you as an adult. And just prayer. I know it's not a major part of what's happening in here, but am I right that both of those things would probably make an impact on sleep and maybe then their mental health? Absolutely. You know, you through a prayer, if you look at prayer in terms of any religion or any philosophy or any belief, if people don't even believe in anything, it can be seen as a way of just trying to organize yourself and find and then believe that it's not just me, there's something more. And we know what's common to all mankind and that's love. So to talk to a child about loveless, so you could do a loveless neuropsychal, you could call it a prayer neuropsychal, whatever you want, but you can actually say, okay, well, let's look at what are, what am I feeling right now? And why do we think we feel that? And you can go through the five steps and that's your prayer and your little act of reach could maybe be in some quote, a little scripture, it could be a visualization of something or whatever, a beautiful quote or something like that. So that is basically a form of prayer because you're tuning into an unconscious, which is your spirit, which is your wisdom, which is your, and you're teaching a child to do that. So yes, it is a form of unloading your burdens into, either you believe it's Jesus, God, loveless, whatever. I love to talk about Godness and loveless because that's something that's relatable to anyone. You know, so you kind of step into that space and there's so much physics behind this too and quantum physics and science behind how you're collapsing the consciousness. And I mean, it's just, we could talk for another two hours about that. So yes, totally, I do believe that. And it'll set your brain waves to a point where your brain can start shifting into sleep mode, which will then have a neurochemical effect on the melatonin and those kinds of things and controlling adrenaline. So it will have, it has, what I've shown with my work is that when you use mind stuff, and specifically the tool of the neuropsycho, which is mind management. And as I said, you can put whatever you want in that. You are changing your psychoneurobiology. So you're changing cortisol levels, you're changing homocysteine levels, you're changing all the things that can keep you awake. You are getting them to the point where they, you're changing, changing, getting brain balance with the brain waves, that kind of stuff. So it's real. I mean, that's very, very real. I don't think I've done an interview in like 45 or 50 minutes with more stuff. We've done thought trees, we've done the neuropsycho, we've done the non-conscious mind. We've done, you know, all of these different things here. We've done the highlight reel, which I kicked in here today. If I was to ask you, I get to ask you one more question. Did you want me to answer the second part of the other question? Yes, yes, yes. What was the second part of the other question? The second part of the other question was blue screen. Oh yes, okay. In me, bullying, social media, all that stuff, it's immersed us in stimulation. So it's good, very good and bad. It's all we need to do is teach our kids to manage it. That's the key. It's not going away. So it's not a bad thing if we know how to manage it. So it's just finding what works for you and your family. In terms of blue screens and all those things, there's a lot of science that supports and contradicts the concept. Listen, if a person's worked up, doesn't matter what you do about blue screens, they're still gonna stay awake. So sometimes people, if they're relaxed enough and they're watching, they film or whatever before they go to sleep, it's not going to be an issue. It's very much up to the individual. It's how we are managing it. You've got to experiment with your child and with yourself and see what works for you. That's really important. So it's a by individual aspect, but just to bear in mind, if we don't manage the immersion that we live in, for example, very quick, kids would get bullied at school. That's not anything new. Bullying's been around since the beginning of time. The difference is it follows them home now. It's 24, it's the immersion. It's an immersion experience versus an intermittent experience. And when you have that distinction, that's what, so we have to learn to manage the immersion. So I mean, I can go for hours about that alone, but that kind of gives you a- By the way, I would love you to stay for hours. I would actually love that. You know, unfortunately you have somewhere to go. I can sit here all day if you want. Oh, I know, I could stay all day chatting to you as well. Let me ask you one last question, because I think people want to know this. I have a very good friend, I've been thinking about the entire interview, who has a child that's just really had chronic struggles with mental health issues over and over, to the point where they've done cutting and- Self-harm. It's gotten really severe. And that child probably, in my opinion, should be more physically active. I know they have prayer in their life, that neuropsycho could be a game changer for them. So I can't wait for them to hear this. I really, really believe the neuropsycho could be a game changer. And to think that maybe in 63, to a certain amount of days, if it's more traumatic, you said a little bit longer, that someone can create positive and or remove negative things in their life. Yeah, they do balance the two together. When is, I guess the last question I would have for today is, because it's worth asking, when is it time for medication with somebody in their brain? Is that something that, you know, you must believe in some cases, if someone's schizophrenic, that potentially they need medication, or do you believe medication never? When does someone take a step and the risks of doing so? Okay, so loaded question. First of all, you'll just quickly refer to your friends, child who's self-harming. What is the age, just very quickly? Teenager. Teenager, okay. So that, what they need, what we all need is to feel empowered and not to feel that there's something wrong with us. And our current biomedical model will say that you've got a broken brain. And so that creates a sense of hopelessness. We also need to help our children develop psychological immunity. So not just immune system, like our immune system helps, you know, we build our immune system, you build your muscles and resistance training, we've got to build our psychological immunity. And what we've taken from our children in a lot of our current models, is that ability to say it's okay to be a mess. Let's work through this mess together. So a huge part of my work in the book that I've just released is about you as a parent, knowing how to manage your own, get your own. And then help model and model exactly. And then allowing a child a space, no matter what they say to you, no judgment, no compassion, but saying, listen, I see how you're showing up. I validate, I recognize. Let's work through this together. Here's a system that's scientific that we can work through together. And the key is empowerment. You have to get a person empowered to change their relationship with themself. And when that happens, that's when the growth comes. The cutting, the self harm, whatever it is, alcohol addiction, whatever it may be, is coming from yes, the trauma. You can go through all the, I bet you that child probably has had so much therapy that they can tell you why they're doing it to a certain extent. But to get the change in a person's life, it starts with feeling, okay, I am empowered to do this. It's okay to be like this. It's not me. I'm responding to life circumstances. Here's a plan for me to be able to move forward and be empowered to actually realize that my brain and my body do what my mind, what I know my wise mind wants it to do. So that's a simple answer to that. Medications are very complex answer, but I'm gonna do the easiest, quickest version upfront. I'm not telling anyone to stop their medication immediately because of the withdrawal. Let's make a quick distinction between drugs and medicine. Medicines are aimed to try and fix a problem like insulin for diabetes. We can test for diabetes. We know there's a biological cause and we've got a drug that's fairly specific to the problem. When it comes to a child cutting, which is a behavior, depression, perspective of life sucks, battling, all the things that you describe with your friend's child, which is obviously this is very surface what I'm saying, but that cluster of things, that is not a brain disease that's going to be fixed by a drug. That's not coming from something wrong in the brain and a chemical imbalance. It's coming from some cluster of toxic issues and things that that child doesn't know how to process. Self-cutting, for example, is so much pain inside yourself that it's too much inside. So it's easier to transfer the pain to the cutting so that that pain detracts from the internal pain. And that's an energy that's, no energy's lost, it's only transferred. So it's transferred energy. So we must transfer child's energy into being able to create safe spaces so that they can talk to us as parents, not just the therapist, but us as parents, caregivers, people that they trust, peers are fantastic for supporting. And that will help them sort of transfer that energy. So a drug is something that like alcohol, cocaine, and psychotropics, they fall under the same category. They're not fixing anything. They're not restoring, they are all drugs. They are, and a drug is a psychoactive substance. So it changes the state of the brain versus a medicine is trying to fix something. So antidepressants aren't fixing chemical imbalance. That's been disproved. It's a must. The pillars of psychiatry that are used to say that you've got a chemical imbalance, et cetera, they're not doing that. What they're doing is they are providing temporary relief. So if someone is in such a bad state, so for example, someone's having very extreme delusions and hallucinations, which is not a disease of schizophrenia, it's schizophrenia symptoms. So instead of saying schizophrenia, bipolar, et cetera, there's a label or diagnosis, which is very unscientific and inaccurate, and actually does harm, research has shown to the person. It doesn't recognize the enormity of what they're going through. It's rather let's say they describe it as behaviors because of something huge in their life, and let's look at this whole person. They don't need a disease label and a medication to validate what they're going through. It's valid enough for them to get the support they need. A label and a drug put it in a little box and make it small, telling them the story, letting them talk, and going through that process gives it the size that it needs, if that makes sense. So the drug, the way I would recommend drugs is to see them as drugs, not medications, and if someone's in an extreme state, temporary. Like, if you have a headache, you take an ibuprofen to relieve the symptoms, but you don't go on ibuprofen chronically, in other words, every day. That's how we should look at these things. So if someone's in a really bad way. And by the way, she also said in the beginning that if you're on medication, she's not encouraging you to get off of it. And if people do want to withdraw, I have interviewed top scientists in the world that are drug withdrawal experts, and they can go and listen to my podcast, and they can search through drug withdrawal, and they'll have the top experts with all the resources to guide them through that process. What a remarkable conversation. It just flew by. I did. It did fly by. You're brilliant. You're exactly how I introduced you. You're very kind. I think the neuropsychal can change people's lives on undoing trauma, undoing negative thoughts, but also creating your life through the neuropsychal. So guys, I'd pour myself into that. You can get any of Dr. Leif's books, but right now you got how to help your child clean up their mental mess, which boy, do we need a guide to building resilience and managing mental health, which all of you and I need. And we have Braini, which is a toy for the kids that we've created. There's a Braini character throughout the book, Ed, and we've made toys as well. So it's really something about the parent and the child. Yep, the child can hold a sepon. You're awesome. You guys, get the book, share the episode, change people's lives. It's that simple. We're the number one growing show on the planet, because you all share it every single week, because I get brilliant people to sit across from me, and we get the best from them in the hour we spend with them. Thank you. That was a great conversation. And if you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow the Edmai Let Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on with the show. Welcome back. So good to have you with me here today. And I'm honored to spend this brief time with you. I think I have something important to ask you about and for us to visit about today. So let's get right into it. What are your fears costing you? I think it's time to evaluate that. Like you and I right now, what are your fears costing you? You know, we have these weights that weigh us down in our lives, these burdens, these fears that we have. Have you ever stopped to think about what it's actually costing you to have these anchors and these weights wearing you down, these fears? You know, people ask me all the time, Ed, is making your dreams come true, the work you put in, the sacrifices you made, the people that let you down all the dark times in your life, all the times you went broke, both financially and emotionally, is it worth it? It's a very interesting question because they always phrase it that way. Is it worth it? Yet in our lives, we spend most of our times evaluating and contemplating what it's going to cost us. So let me say something to you up front. The price you will pay to become the person you're worthy of, the price you will pay to become the real you, the price you will pay to make your dreams come true and your vision a reality, and the people around you blissful and happy, that price, and there's a severe price, is infinitely smaller than the price you're going to pay if you don't, and that others around you will pay. You know, I don't think God gave you another day in your life because you needed it. I think he added another day to your life because somebody needed you. But here's the thing. They need the real you, the authentic you, the one who's playing all out in their life and pursuing their dreams. I can tell you the answer to that question is as good as you think it'll be to make your dreams come true and dreams that you can't even imagine right now, visions of your life, but maybe even more importantly, as good as you think it would feel to meet the real you, the one you were born to be, and remember this, you were born to do something great with your life, but to finally get introduced or reacquainted or reintroduced to that person. Maybe years ago knew them very well, that version of you, but things have happened, these anchors, these fears, these toxic relationships, whatever they might be, these disappointments in our life, we've moved so far away from that person that we're capable of becoming that we don't even recognize them anymore. As good as you think it'll be to meet that person for the first time or once again, it's a million times better. Now here's the hook. You have to start thinking like a rich person, and I don't mean just financially. I mean rich in spirit, rich in emotions, rich in relationships, and for many of you, including me, we wanna be rich financially. People ask me all the time, Ed, why do you put out all this free content? I mean, you put out the best content in the world, everybody else charges for inferior content. You put out the best stuff, and I appreciate when people say that, and you don't really charge for it. This is free. I do that because I believe in the law of reciprocity. I also wanna make the world better, and I believe I put out enough good stuff if someday I ask you to come to an event or participate in something you probably wanna come. I wanna pour into you because I don't think God gave me another day because I needed it. I think he gave me another day because people need me, and they need you, and you need to remember, you were born to do something great with your life. My brother, my sister, you were, and I wanna remind you of that today, but I think it's time to evaluate what are my fears, my patterns, a toxic person in a relationship that I'm in with right now that's weighing me down. What's it ultimately costing me? Because it's just your life. That's all we're talking about is just you, just your life, and by the way, you're not getting out of it alive. You are not getting out of this alive. So all these things that are weighing you down are truly silly because at the end, we all end up in the same situation where our body eventually ceases to exist, and hopefully our soul goes to heaven. But in your case, you gotta stop thinking like a poor person, and I'm talking to me as much as I am you. Let me tell you what I mean by poor, poor in spirit, poor in emotion, and poor financially. See, when I was broke financially, when I would go into a store and I wanted something, I wouldn't get what I wanted. I would get what I could afford. Sound familiar? So I was a guy who had flipped price tags over, oh, it's this, it's this, and I would evaluate what it would cost me, not what it was worth. And so oftentimes in life, people ask me, Ed, was it worth it? But in their life, they spend most of the time contemplating the cost. It's gonna cost me this, it's gonna cost me that. You know, maybe I wanna become the person that would be able to cost me losing this person in my life. It'll cost me time. It'll cost me my hobby that I like spending so much time in. It'll cost me pain and emotion and whatever it might, it'll cost me, I'd have to let go of my fears. I have to let go of my patterns. And these invisible things that weigh us down in our life, they kill us. And so there's a lot of walking dead in the world. There's this old saying that, they say it about men, but it's people. Most people die 75 or 80 years old, but they really stopped living at 21 or 22 or 23 years old. We just don't put them into the ground until they're older. Too many people are walking around like this and maybe you relate to it. Maybe you relate to a percentage of it. These fears, these relationships, these things we worry about, these invisible boogeymen, what are people gonna be thinking about me? Do you wanna get to the end of your life? And if someone asks you honestly, how did you live your life? Do you wanna answer truthfully, scared? I lived afraid, afraid I wasn't good enough, afraid I wasn't worth it, afraid of what other people would think about me, afraid to lose people around me that didn't even love me or care about me or want me to be my best. I lived my life afraid. Or at the end you wanna say, man, I maxed out my life. I got all the emotions, all the memories, all the achievements, all the richness in every area out of my life, I maxed out my life. Now I can tell you this, if you hold onto these anchors much longer, it's gonna keep costing you and the longer you do it. See, even these things, sometimes what holds us back is our feeling bad about things we've done in the past that we're not proud of. And we use these memories as weapons against ourselves. We stab ourselves with it over and over or somebody who's cheated on us or made a mistake. We use them as weapons against ourselves and that's what you need to be asking yourself whether it's worth it. Is it worth it to make your dreams come true? Is it worth it to change? Is it worth it to grow? You bet it is a million times better because when you make your original dreams come true you don't understand the ripple effects of all these other things you can't even think about right now that happened. When you meet the real you, it's spectacular. You have to remember this, you can't love yourself. Everyone here, man and woman, macho man and every single body listen to this, okay? You can't love yourself if you don't even know yourself and you can't know yourself if you're not truly being yourself and these anchors cause us not to be us. I'm personally haunted with the thought of getting to the end of my life and never meeting me. Never getting introduced to me. I wanna meet that man. I'm interested in who he is and I wanna do the things every single day because once I got wealthy and I was rich and I went into a store, I didn't look at price tags anymore. I looked at whether it was worth it and I got what I wanted and our lives are a perfect metaphor of that. We're constantly evaluating the cost instead of whether or not it's worth it. Cost versus worth is a subtle difference. Is it worth it to change? Is it worth it to let go of these memories? Is it worth it to drop your fears? You will never meet you otherwise. Some of us are held back by crappy programming our parents installed in us when we were young. Remember this, most things in life are caught not taught. We catch a way of thinking, we catch a way of having emotions and we have to unleash ourselves and let go of those things. And I'm like, so what's the thing for you? What's the thing? Is it a person you need to let go of? Is it a fear you need to let go of? Is it an operating pattern? Is it a memory as a weapon you're using against yourself? Is it just you're just not sure? You gotta remember who the hell you are. And if you've never met them, you need to get introduced and you need to get acquainted. Cause I could tell you of all the jets and islands and cool stuff I've accumulated in my life, all the accumulations are wonderful. And I want you to accumulate the things you want that'll provide memories for your family if they matter to you, the donations you can make, the people you can be there for, all the different things you can do when you get financially secure. All those things are incredible, but they don't bring us fulfillment. They can bring us temporary happiness and there's nothing wrong with temporary happiness but fulfillment, all of that stuff doesn't add up to meeting you, finally meeting you. At some point in your life, don't you wanna meet you or get reacquainted because you once knew her? There was a time in your life where you knew her or him. You'll never meet them otherwise. And so I have to tell you something, you have to start, you have to start to make a bold move in your life because you're worth it, your family's worth it. And the world needs you. You were born for a reason. You were born to do something great in small ways and in big ways in your life. And oftentimes in our lives what hold us back sometimes is the stories we tell ourselves. See, it's not the events of our lives, circumstances that define us. It's the meaning we take away from those events. And those meanings create an emotion and that emotion drives our behavior, that emotion of fear, that emotion of anxiety, that emotion of sadness, or it could be an emotion of bliss, of confidence, of increase, of belief, of being guided, of being protected. But you have to ask yourself that question. See, it's not the event, it's the stories we tell ourselves. And listen to me, an emotion cannot exist long term without a story attached to it. You've had a lot of things happen in your life that were emotional, but the story didn't stick or you didn't take away the wrong meaning. And so that emotion doesn't stay. If you're feeling one of those emotions, it's attached to a story. It's a story you're telling yourself. The emotion can't stay without the story. And the story is just the meaning you took from the event. It's just a meaning you took from an event. So sometimes the story you're telling yourself is, I don't wanna be alone, so I'm hanging onto this person that still weighs me down. Or where I'm at is good enough because I don't wanna risk what I've got, and that's a story. Or I've made this mistake before, or someone hurt me, and what it meant was XYZ, and you have a feeling about it. These anchors are actually lies we tell ourselves that are anchored in a story that doesn't serve us, that causes an emotion that sticks. So if we change the story, either we take a different meaning from an event and say, could it have meant this? See, when I was a young man with my dad's drinking, I thought, this means our family's less than and more dysfunctional, and all these things I attached to the meaning I attached to that story that was happening. And then at one point I realized, no, what was actually happening was God was using that to teach me how to learn to be present with people and read people and be empathetic with people and believe in people, and that God was using that story for me. When my baseball career ended, I was injured, it probably ended a career that would have ended anyway, quite frankly, but I was a pretty good player. And when I got injured, I remember thinking, man, this is my only dream in my entire life. God doesn't answer prayers, right? This was my prayer to do this, right? The meaning of this is, I just was never good enough. The meaning from it was, it just wasn't meant to be. I wasn't meant to be somebody. I wasn't meant to do something great with my life, and I attached all these meanings to what was a pretty traumatic event. But I could have attached the meaning of that time, that God's got something bigger in store for me, that there's something bigger and bolder for me, and that Edmai Led, I thought I was, was not gonna be a baseball player, but the Edmai Led I thought I was could be this other person who contributes to millions of people's lives. So once I attached a meaning to it, that what God really did was, I probably would have played three or four or five more years and then been released, and then been in my mid to late 20s, and maybe I wouldn't have taken advantage of a lot of the opportunities that came along. So that career ended right when it was supposed to, so that I could start to redirect my life in a direction. And from there, I got a job at an orphanage, and that orphanage changed my life. Because of that orphanage, I met these young boys that looked just like me. These boys were all wards of the court. They were taken from their families, their families were incarcerated or dead, and had molested them at some point in their life. And so baseball ended, and I'm finding myself making $6 an hour at an orphanage. And I'm thinking, God, you took multi-million dollars playing in front of hundreds of thousands of people a year, 50,000 people a night from me, to be with eight children in a cottage, making six bucks an hour. And that's exactly what he was doing, because what I needed to be was, I needed to be connected with people. I needed to love people. And what's even crazier about it is, the way I connected with those boys is they had grown up with all this pain and suffering and dysfunction in their homes. And that's what I grew up with in a different way, with my father being an alcoholic when I was young. My career had to end that exact day it ended, so that I would end up in that exact house with those exact boys, and they could have someone who understood them, who could see them and knew who they really were, because I was just like them. I recently said to Jesse Lee on my podcast, I said all people that go through any pain in their life, especially when they're young, we have different eyes. We just have different eyes. Our eyes just say, please love me, please protect me, please be good to me, please be kind, please be gentle, please believe in me. We have these different eyes. And I remember when I walked in there, they had my eyes, not the same color eyes. My boys were of every ethnicity, every background. We had those eyes. And when I meet someone who's gone through pain in their life, I see those eyes. But I found out something, we don't just have the same eyes, we actually have the same heart. We have the same heart. And every single human being has that heart. It's whether or not they'll unleash it, unleash the real them, release the real them, or will they continue in their life to suppress the real them, and settle for this less than version of them, because they've created a bunch of stories, and a bunch of fears, and a bunch of relationships in their life that they hide in these stories, they hide in these emotions, and they never unleash the real them. I figured this out. All I've ever wanted to do is change how I feel. I didn't like how I felt. I wanted to change how I feel, so I would accumulate and achieve and do things to change how I feel in my life. And as I've gotten older, I've realized if I can change how I feel, I can get all those things the easy way. And that's what I've started to do in my life, maybe from 40 to right now, 52 years old. So I want to challenge you today, evaluate this thought, evaluate what are your fears costing you? What are these anchors costing you? I want you to really pray about it, really think about it. If you're on a walk right now, you're driving in your car, just what's it costing you? And what would my life look like, potentially? And by the way, you don't even really know, just so you know, it's gonna be so much bigger, so much more beautiful, so many small things that are gonna happen along the way of you meeting you. And by the way, what's great is you continue to meet new versions of you. See, when you start to live your life without all these fears, without all these people anchoring you down with all these patterns and stories, what's great about it is, there's a new you that shows up every couple of years. And there's this new version of you, an improved version of you every year. One of the things I'm excited about is to meet the 55 year old me. Cause I didn't die at 21 or 22, like most people, getting around to bury me at 85 or 90. No, no, no, no, I'm reborn all the time. I can't wait to make the 55 year old me. I'm chasing that guy. When I get there, I can't wait to meet the 60 year old me. You know, the 25 year old me was nothing like the 30 year old me. I mean, it was a similar character, but different life, different contribution, different thoughts, too many people are exactly the same person they were two or three years ago. And that's what it's really costing you, isn't it? And the reason you're not happy or as happy as you could be is you know this isn't you. You know this isn't you. You know there's more in you. Deep down in your heart and your soul and your spirit, the reason you're not happy isn't these other people. Isn't your boss, isn't your job, isn't your body, isn't your lack of money, isn't any of it. It's that you know this really isn't you. You know this really isn't you. And it's time you meet him. It's time you meet her. It's time at least you get reacquainted if you once knew them. I wanna challenge you to do that today. I wanna challenge you to step out and drop whatever that anchor is or multiple anchors of these weapons you're using, these mistakes you've made, these choices that you regret, blah, blah, blah. Stop it. That's not who you are. Your destiny's now, it's in the future. It's moving forward. And there's something great waiting for you. And is the price worth it? Absolutely. Is the cost worth it? A thousand percent. Cause eventually you start getting what you want, not just what you can afford in your life. And here's the truth. You can't afford to get to the end of this life without meeting you. Cause only then will you love you. When you're being you, you can meet you. And when you meet you, you can truly love you. It's time for you to step up. Remember once again, I'm gonna tell you, he didn't add another day for you. Cause you needed it. He added another day because some other person and the world needs the real you. It's time for you to step up. Cause only then will you love you. Cause only then will you love you. Cause only then will you love you. Cause only then will you love you. Cause only then will you love you. Cause only then will you love you. Cause only then will you love you.