Ryan Cabrera

What's it like resolving a conflict with a wrestler? Depends. You know, there's I know when to shut up. Yeah. You know, yeah. Uh, no, I mean, she's so she's so sweet, you know, but yeah, I'm sure it's the only time, you know, things get aggressive. It's a funny thing to think about when we're sleeping. Okay. Because it's she'll be in her sleep and I don't know if she's like, I think she's in the ring or something and I'll get like a whack to the face. Oh, wow. Have you always lived in LA? I moved here in 2001. Okay. So you've been here. Yeah. Okay. I was always, I started in, you know, then did studios, city, then did Sherman Oaks, then back to Encino. And then when I met my wife, we got a place in Orlando and then recently got a place in a career like a year or two years ago. Okay. So we go back and forth. So it's still like new to me. So you still go to Florida. Yeah. So we do half, half the time there, half the time here. Okay. For, is there any reason why? Couple reasons. Okay. Well, one being, If you don't mind me asking. No, no, no, no. Well, so travel wise now with a kid, you know, like when you're, when you're towards, so we do all like fly dates, like we don't do the tour bus. Yeah. We don't do the like three or four, six months, you know, bus stuff anymore. It's all just like weekends. Respect. So we're back with the kids. Like a country singer. Yeah. Well, everybody on the tour has kids and we're not, you know, a quits. Kind of saying to really do, yeah. Like a bunch of buses with all the kids and all that kind of stuff. So for us, like, you know, if I have a show in Baltimore, Ocean City on the weekend or Jersey on the weekend, instead of flying from LA, we'll be at the Orlando house and my wife as well. She's a wrestler. So she's, I know she's a wrestler. So she's back and forth all the time too. So going back in time from the East coast is so much easier than flying there the day before and all that kind of stuff. So it makes sense that you can have both places. Yeah. So when I see the tour dates and like, okay, where are we going to? Yeah, we'll be okay. Let's do this month. And then these are a little bit more like anything like left. And why Orlando? Well, that was where she was. That's where we met. Oh, that's where, is that where she's from? She's from Ohio, but they moved there. So that's kind of the hub of WWE. Yeah, the performance centers there. So for anyone listening, Ryan is married to Alexa Bliss, who's a professional wrestler in WWE. And I'm pretty impressed with her. She's, she's, yeah. She's a bad man. She, she's an athlete. I mean, I see clips. It looks painful. It is. To go through that. We got to bring out Martin month out. And then I see you guys. So I'm an outsider looking in, right? And you guys look like you have this, like this beautiful family. You have a daughter. Yeah. You just turned two. Right. So you got a little young kid. How long you guys been married? So, well, let's see now. We got married in 2021. What year is it now? It's four years. It's going to be fourth year. Okay. So yeah, that's great. Yeah. Crazy. I always wonder, like, what, what's it like to be married to a wrestler? Well, I mean, you can answer that two foot one. The travel part is tough. Yeah, it's a tough job. So it's two opposite, you know, war. Yeah. So touring at the same time. Sometimes we get lucky and we'll actually be in the same area. And then so for their show, if they're on Raw, it's on Mondays, so then I can pop off after Sunday, meet her for Mondays. But right now she's on Fridays. Well, right now she's on both. But on Fridays, I typically can't go see her stuff. But we try to like go to each other's stuff. And sometimes we get lucky. But so the travel part, you know, coordinating when you have a child is that part is tough. But, you know, as far as just going to it's just the shows are so entertaining. And she's such like it's such a different person when she's on and in the ring than what she is like at home. So to go see or do that. It's like it's the stage. Yeah. But it's so freaking. God, it's so fucking like physical. Oh, yeah. Like, and that's, you know, obviously, you know, people have their opinions of what like wrestling, that's the physicality and all that. You can't fake that. I actually think that we come from a generation of how old are you? I am 43. Okay. So I'm 46. I'm at the age where I have to think about it. Right. Yeah. So it's all my I'm 46. We come from a generation where it was up for debate. Like people were like arguing about wrestling. It's no longer that like wrestling is solidified itself as a sport and it and it's an entertainment right that people want. And I think that like the really great wrestlers like we've seen enough now to know what a career in wrestling can mean and to it's huge. It's impossible. It's hard earned. It's athletic. It can take everything from you as well. But also you can go on and you can build a career from wrestling that's big, larger than life and it's not just wrestling becomes one aspect of your career as an entertainer, which I think sets you up for like movies and stuff because those are also so physical. Like what people don't understand about making films is it's such a physical job from the stunts to learning how to fight to learning how to do this to learning. And I think that wrestling really lends itself to filmmaking. And so I think the era we come from it was more of a debate because it was still kind of even though it wasn't like old. It wasn't new when we were coming up. It was still like the size of it was was getting it was like it was the first time it was that big. Yeah. The fill arenas and all that in the 80s and the 90s. So I think now though, I think it's more widely kind of agreed that like wrestling is it's an important piece of entertainment. That's a sport. And it's the most streamed sport in the world, you know, entertainment show in the world. And for me, like I'd I'd I'd been going for a while excited buddy, the Miz, who I've been friends with a long time. Actually, one of my first friends in LA, like back in the early like when Saddle Ranch was like the spot to go to. And so I would when he became a wrestler, like I would go to his show. So I'd been around it. But now like being behind scenes with my wife, like it's it's insane what what they do and what they put themselves through. But what's what's tough because she'll come home and have like, you know, bruises everywhere, like all over our arms. So like if we go to like the pediatrician, if I go to the bathroom, they'll be like, you OK, is everything OK at home? Like, no, no, no. I'm like, my wife's a wrestler. Like this is what this is what happens. Like, because, you know, their elbows are all big right now. Yeah, it looks like there's an arm print on her arm. I'm like, I'll let people know you're a wrestler. Does she have like a a wind down routine when she comes home? Like for the physical aspect of like, I'm assuming she comes home injured all the time. Yeah. Getting an inside look at like what life is like out of the ring. When she gets home, she's like massage me and she's beat up. Yeah. And does she have a routine? Can you crack my back? And I said on her back and it's just. And does she have a lot? Does she have to do a lot of like physical therapy and different kinds of sports therapy to like? Probably should. But they they have to do it so often that it's just like calluses, you know, their bodies just have to get used to it. And then like what like I got in the ring, we were filming something and I got in there and I like I just did one thing off the ropes and I like my back was straight bloody. Yeah. And then I took what they call a bump like is where she just fall on the ground and like my neck, I couldn't move my neck for like three weeks from one thing. My body is not used to that. So like her, she's been doing it for nine years. Yeah. So, you know, what she puts her body through and then comes home and it's just like he massages you like, yeah, of course. But then she gets up on a on a flight the next day and back to it. That's such a crazy job. It is. It's wild. She's she's big deal, man. She's cool as shit. Yeah, she's got a big following. Yeah. That's cool. You should be you must be very proud. I am. Yeah. Yeah. When I when I see her in there, I'm like, how did you just do that? You know, like what just happened? Who like she flips a switch? Yeah. And turns into somebody that I don't know. Yeah. Because I haven't met, you know, the character. You know, would you say that there's an aspect of you that's the same way on stage? Or is it just you? Oh, man, a little bit both. I try to just be maybe myself times like 10. OK, you know, like it's still me, but I know I'm putting on a show. You know, like, yeah, I'm not like when I'm on stage, I try to like talk. I talk a lot, you know, depending on if it's this one, because I want every show to be different and I try to like tell stories and and figure out ways to to throw some personality in there as opposed to just playing a song and then playing a song, playing a song. And sometimes sometimes it's great and people like, oh, my God, he's so funny. What? And then sometimes we're like, you talk too much. You know, but it's still me. I always say I talk too much. Do I? On this show, I talk too much. Well, that's what you're supposed to do. Yeah, I can do. I always don't. What about stage? On stage, I actually was just trying to work that out while you were talking because I was thinking about it and I was like, do I like? Or do you get to the same rhythm where you kind of like say, you know, you get like this works every night. So we kind of know this is what leads into this song. Well, I don't do that, although I do talk in the same places. Right. Because the spaces are there. I guess it's different when you have somebody else. You know, you have your brother and my brother and he jumps in sometimes. So it is just me. So that's why it's all on your shoulders, which is I've never had to do that. Occasionally, there's a show where one of us will carry it more than the other. Right. Which we're lucky to have. Like we just recently did this Disney Christmas special and we had four days to prepare and I get really anxious and really almost borderline shut down in a situation like that. Like I really do. Like I really get like, I don't know. I don't know if you understand if you have if you can relate to that. But like they're like, you have four days and you've got to learn this song. And we're going to we're like picking a song. And then we're and I'm like, I don't really know. I love Christmas songs, but I can't hear myself singing any of them. And we've only done a couple of them and they were OK. Like, you know what I mean? So then and then he picked a really hard song in my opinion. And then he just started running with it. And I didn't have a I felt like I didn't have a say, but someone had to do it. And that's kind of how he functions. He's like, someone's got to do it. He's always going to be the guy who picks the ball up and he just starts running down the field. And then three days, two days, one day, and then we're on a plane to fucking Orlando. Yeah. And we're like, was it Epcot? Disney World. OK. Yeah. Yeah. So then I'm like, God, I got to learn this song. I knew the song, but I barely knew it. Like I like the song. It's a classic. You know it enough. Yeah. But I also like have like neurological stuff. So like I can't remember lyrics. Dude, I can't either to save my life. I can't either. In songs I love, I can. If you're like, sing it on the spot, I will not hit any of the lyrics. That's why I don't do a lot of guest performances. That's why I've never done the national anthem. Exactly. Because I'm not a million times. I'm like, I will mess up the words. They're like, we'll put a teleprompter. I'll still mess up the words. I have. I'll be looking at that and I'll get to the next line. I'll still mess up the words. Yes. So I'm I'm on that like neurodivergent. I live in that world, right? Dislexic, all the things. And then if you put me on the spot, I can't do it. And so even like a good example, we'll get back to the Christmas song. Because I know you're on the edge of your seat for that. Well, first off, I I do love Christmas and I love Disney. I know you're very jealous. So yeah. So I figured you'd like that. But like Luke Combs asked me to come sing with him at Stagecoach and I wanted to so bad. So I said, of course, I'm going to do it. Yeah. I fucking love Luke. And you were friends and I'm also just his biggest fan. Listen to his music. And then he asked me to sing a song that I know I listen to it all the time. Yeah. And then I get on stage and I fuck it up. I just can't. I did OK. Yeah. But it was not a great performance. And it was not what I wanted it to be as a fan. And you know, I wanted to be this great moment. It was a cool moment for sure, because we're just these cool ass guys on stage together and it's great. But it wasn't what I musically. I know I have better chops than that. Yeah. And I wanted to impress him and I I didn't. That was like he's gracious. He would say he wouldn't say you didn't impress me, but I know I didn't do. His band. In your head, you know, we always think that maybe I think just as entertainers were always thinking like, oh, I didn't. But then other people come up to you after like, dude, that was sick. Like it's how I felt right. Yeah. So how we feel kind of just defines the experience. Yeah. And that's how I felt. And then I and that's a good question, right? Maybe we can get into some therapy anyways. But let me finish the Christmas story. Yeah. We go to Orlando. He has it. He learned it and he carried the whole performance. I sang the chorus, which is the easiest part and like one little piece. What songs are you allowed to say? The fairy tale of New York by the Pogues. OK. Amazing song. Likely shouldn't touch it, but it's the only song we wanted to do and fuck it. But it's a classic kind of like like punk Christmas song. You know, it was great, though. Like it ended up he did a great job and I enjoyed it because I did get to sing my favorite part of the song, which is the chorus, which I knew it's the rest of the song. I didn't really know that I that I never took the time. But my jumbled up brain just can't hold on to words sometimes. It just gets they'll get lost. Anyways, he carried that show. So I'm lucky because like we were saying, you have to carry the whole show on stage. We get to kind of sometimes hand it off on days where we just don't got the stuff. We just go like, you got to carry this one and he and he does. And then sometimes I do. Right. So that was that was me. I did a last was last year. Maybe two years ago, I did a thing called the boy band Christmas. And it was like a couple of cats from it was like some of the 98 degrees guys all for one. Eric Strada and like they're like, all right, what Christmas songs you want to do? I'm like, um, I thought I was just doing, you know, a couple of my hits and one Christmas song, which I wrote a Christmas song for it. I was like, I was good. But they're like, no, no, we're going to all do Christmas song together. I'm like, uh, one song or the whole time, just one song. Okay. That's all I had to do. So I'm like, all right, last Christmas. I can do that. You know, I know that one. Oh, we did that one. Yeah. I'm like that I can that I can do. But then in the verses, I'm like, y'all got to cover these verses because I'm going to mess this up every single night. Did they? Yeah. Would you be putting the boy band category though? No, but I think so. These these I'm not. I was never in a boy band. I saw you as like a singer songwriter, singer songwriter. But that's kind of what I brought to that tour. Right. You know, like they it actually worked because I would come out and do acoustic guitar and some of the songs. I did electric guitar and some of the songs. And did you tour with any of those guys back in the day? No. Okay. No, back in the day. But it's more like a 2000s kind of nostalgia thing. Yeah. Like that was, you know, kind of putting together four different groups. And then I kind of brought in the singer songwriter. Right. You know, aspect to it, which did it. It's working. It's all pop at the end of the day. Yeah, it is all pop. But did any of them like also like play guitar and singing stuff? So drew only from 90 degrees at one point. He would come out with me and do back up from the way down. That's cool. Yeah. Just to get involved just because we all wanted, you know, just to do something different. It was Christmas. That's cool. And it was fun. Mix it up. But the fan base, you know, is still the same. It's the same fan base as, you know, boy bands as it was. Singer songwriters as it is, you know, good Charlotte fans, you know, they're all not all the same. But kind of, you know, like they all just love. It's all still good pop music. Dude, I did the Emos, not Dead Cruise the first year. And people freaked out that I was on it. Because I, me personally, I was asked the same question. I was like, do I belong here? You know, I'm not an emar. I'm not a pop rock guy. I was a, you know, more of a kind of pop singer songwriter, but kind of came up in the TRL days. So I didn't think I fit. But, you know, Matt Kutchall was like, dude, trust me, this is going to crush. Dude, he's the best. I think we've been friends for a long time. I always saw you as like an emo kid who got put in a pop lyrically, like box lyrically. And then it got the sound was a little different. The sound was just a what you kind of on the way down is a is a rock song. But, you know, Leans pop as well. You're like a mix and a guitar away from B. That song's like a one mix and one more guitar sound away from being like a dashboard. It's like it's like had Feldy produced it. It'd be it could be in that answer. It's like a few degrees apart. Yeah. If we're really being honest about what the pop punk thing was in the 2000s, it was this pop thing that was like throw more guitars, more guitars. And like, yeah, bands and we dressed a certain way and we look like all kind of look like. But if you took all that away and you just listen to the songs, songs, yeah, you like produce it a little bit more this way and it's that produced a little bit. It was just what you called it, you know, back in the in the early 2000s, it wasn't cool, considered cool to be called, you know, pop. Whereas now nobody cares. It's like, yeah, we wrote pop. So I mean, I agree. But just the perception back then, because even like a man buying another, you know, singer, songwriter CD back then was different than it is now. Because dudes are like, dude, I like what I like. I don't give a shit. But back then, you know, people would be like, I can't buy. It was a completely different time. The perception was was so different. So I, you know, to bring it back with a lot of that. Oh, yeah. That would have been hard. I mean, it was it was I wasn't expecting an all, you know, 13 to 18 year old female demographic myself. Obviously managers and labels at the time were I didn't I didn't get that because I was young and you wouldn't I was just like, dude, I'm going to I'm going to play for like colleges, college kids are going to be into this. That's going to be my demographic. And then it just ended up being, you know, the younger girl demographic, which, you know, the shows were great. But then we end up when you're, you know, you know, a real songwriter writing, you know, what you consider like real, you know, you know, thoughtful songs. And you're playing in malls at the time in the beginning. It was it was a little weird. You don't know what's going on. I'm like, OK, I wasn't expecting to be, you know, my first tour, big tour, was in a mall, was a mall tour. And you were like, but how old were you? I was 21. OK, so you're 21. You're trying to make it some manager, some agent, whoever. It's like, we got you this opportunity, your opportunity. You're like, OK, great. But yeah, I'll do that because at the time you do it. That's how we were. We played malls, too. We we had we before we were signed. Oh, that's crazy. We were like, fucking doing these little like playing at the King of Prussia Mall. Yeah. Doing acoustic, yeah, in the food court. Yeah. And you would do it because you're just trying to get signed or you're trying to make it or you're trying to whatever. And at the time it's still like selling records. And so you're selling your CDs there and you're doing your thing. And then you could say, I don't want to say lucky ones because I don't think it's luck. I think timing is interesting and work is interesting because if you work hard enough, you will find luck because you're going forward and you're going down the road and you're saying yes. Yeah, you're attracting right. So things that bring you to where it's going to be. But then it jumps off and then depending on X, Y, Z, you get thrown on, let's say a pop tour where you're opening for this girl singer or this boy band or whatever. Right. OK. This first day you're opening for Jessica Simpson. Right. So imagine if a different group of people were the people that were like and you were thrown on in front of Eve Six or you were thrown on in front of Newfound Glory or you were fun. So it's really a matter of because things were so separated and categorized and marketed as something. Right. Like we got to market it like this. He's a good looking guy and he sings these love songs. And we're going to put him on in front of her because she's got all girl fans and they're going to love him. Right. And that's kind of like you can hear you can hear the guys. That was then. Yeah. Right. It's so interesting because now that old school marketing doesn't work because kids are too they don't want to be marketed to. Right. They're like fuck you. I'm going to listen to what I want. Yes. And I'm going to make a playlist and it's going to be all this crazy shit and this the most pop thing you've ever heard. And at the same time K-pop and a heavy screen heavy band. Right. And so I think like we live in a different time. But coming from our era that was actually the way it was. Also where are you from. Born in Texas. OK. So this kid from Texas who's just wants to make it is not going to pass up the opportunity either to go and play for someone and play his music or someone. So you found we we found ourselves in similar situations where never am I ungrateful for the opportunities and the experiences I got to have. But as a 46 year old man when I look back and I see like some of the stuff that I'm like all the adults around were just too excited and too thirsty. And that's all they knew. It's like here's here's here's how it works. OK. Get out there. Do this. Do the same thing. And they'll try the same thing with like 10 other artists. The exact same plan. Even though you're all 10 completely different artists. They'll try the same thing and then be like all right well that one works. So then maybe this will work again. And we only need one door. Yeah. As long as one works all the rest. Yeah. Then you're good. But as a grown man married raising a kid you could look back at that kid and do a better job of shepherding that kid than any of those fucking guys. Right. I think because you're an artist and you had that experience. Yeah. Which is something that I like where as a badge of honor now if I look back at my whole career I have nothing but love for the what I got to do and the experiences I got to have in course for the guys I got to do. That's why I feel so lucky that we were in that. But I wish I had. I wish I had me back there because I'm honest. You're right. And I don't lie to people and I don't care about money. I care enough about money to pay the bills and do what I have to do. But not enough that I would sell someone up the river or that I would do any long term damage to someone. Right. You know what I mean. And I would have that discussion and let them and now we actually do run a company where we behave like this. We discuss things. We explain all the implications of everything short term long term. We go around on all of it until we've all come to a decision that everyone feels really good about. And we don't always all have to agree. But there needs to be like this open honest transparent informational relationship around I think the transactions of the music business because they can feel dirty sometimes or they can feel and talking through stuff no matter how big or small whatever with artists I think is like super important because I feel like artists are super smart and very creative and they'll make good decisions if all the information is on the table and they can look at it. Yeah. And then it needs to be where I think the money is just a byproduct of the thing and we measure it and we look at it and we don't we take it seriously. It's not that money is not important. It is. I mean it's got to make a living. But that can't be the leading factor in a decision. It's got to be part of it's got to feel like it's the the upside maybe or whatever it is. So I think like if I wish that I had someone back there telling me that this kind of information or giving me a license to feel this way instead of just feeling like I was lucky better keep working. Yeah. Don't let it get away and do what everyone tells you to do or you're you know they're going to take the opportunities away or whatever it was. But not to say you had that experience but I feel like you could probably relate to it because when you're in that bubble and you're just running as fast as you can forward I think it can sometimes feel like you just hit a lottery and you're the lucky one they plucked up out of the group and I don't think that's true. Yeah. Well for me the way I it was hard to make it then. Yeah. Like you didn't have any outlet other than performing. That's all you could do. You couldn't you know make a video and pop it up on the internet like you had to get discovered. It was not up to you. It was like you can perform MTV radio. There's no other place so you couldn't just be creative make your own video and put it out. There was no platform and so you just had to like hope and pray that the gods yeah which is you know that was the time it was crazy as fucking crazy time. It made you you had to work your ass off and it made you tough. Yeah. It did make you tough. Yeah. Those times of course playing in malls will give you a fucking fortitude. Well that's the thing is once you do all that everything else seems you know doing all the stuff that you didn't necessarily see yourself doing made everything to me easier because I can be put in a situation that normally would be uncomfortable for maybe somebody who hasn't done all those other things and be like OK I'm prepared for this because I've done this this this this this I've done so many random things. It's hard to throw something you know now at least for me you know be like well I performed in the corner of a Mexican food restaurant for the mall I performed a sorority you know all those things led led me to be able to to perform better now. I think you know because I've done it all like season. Yeah you like you've had every terrible experience all the good ones even you know the experience at stage coach you're going to learn something from that that now next time you do it you'd be like OK here's what I need to do to now do that. But yeah you did it and then figure out what to how to get better at it. We've had a lot of that in our careers that lead up to you getting better and better and better and better. And just the ability to have that experience to make it look like you're fine so that when you know how to do that. So when people see the stage goes thing you know that was awesome. You're like is actually I did terrible. Yeah. And they would not hear you because you're at least a pro enough to perform and get the job done even if you don't think it was an A plus. Maybe on your worst day it's a B plus and it's still at a high level B plus kind of feels like an A plus to everyone else. Yeah. Yeah. Well you have to put on a show that you're like in your you know in your head you could be thinking oh this is not my bed but but while you're performing your job is to put on you know entertain put on the best show that you know to them you can do. And so there's there's times where I'm like this isn't sounding very good. In my head but on my face like you said I'm showing the crowd that like I'm showing that I'm crushing this because I have to but in my head I'm like I didn't crush this. Yeah. But as you know as long as your performer like they thought it was great. That's all you know for me as long as they they loved it and you know they want to give them their money's worth do what you got to do. Mm hmm. Your daughter's too. You just turned to House fatherhood. It's been a lot but that's the best thing that ever happened to me. Yeah. We were we were eventually going to you know we always I've always wanted to have kids but then you know once we got together the timing was was tough with schedules and all that and it just happened and thank God it did because who knows what could happen you know getting older and all that stuff. But first year was was tough. Yeah first year is tough. It was tough for so many so many reasons all the unknowns you know the things that you think you covered you know when you're talking to your wife like how you're going to handle things you know you have the way that here's how I'm going to do it I can't wait you know once I have a kid I'm going to do it this way I'm going to do this way I'm not going to do that I'm going to do this and then it happens and you're like oh shit that's I'm not doing anything I thought I was going to do everything you have to figure out how to just figure it out. Yeah there's no book that really gives you can read a hundred of them and it's not going to you're not going to stick to it or watch a hundred you know Instagram videos and be like thought I was going to do that but it happened. The idea that there is like perfect parenting is such a lie and you get fed it a lot. So many times you're doing this wrong you're doing this wrong here's how you raise the perfect toddler is like I had to figure out how to be like OK stop and just she's loved. You know with my wife I'm like we're doing the best job we were given you know all of us all we can and that's all I can try to do and that took a while for me mentally to get there because I was so sleep deprived and I started becoming somebody I never thought you know I was getting snappy and I'm like I've never been snappy. I've never been like on you know on edge and I was on edge and I just had to remind you. You've never been an edgy edgy guy. No really. No not much like happy and I was always happy but like I don't really let too much get to me unless it's something really you know important and if they and then once it does like you'll get me and you know I'll let you know but for the most part I can take a lot you know I have thick skin yeah and so I don't try to let I don't get worried too much. Yeah not too stressed. I try not to be you know I try to just understand that you know only worry about the things that I can control. Yeah and if it's out of my control you know what's it going to do. But parents you know like OK I had to remind myself like you're doing the best job you can do you know and we were and once we figured out we're on the same team and we are doing a great job and you know then you know it got easier for me. Yeah but I was you know I was honest in the first year because I you know my wife would be like oh you know everything's great and and and I love that but I'm like it's not this this sucks like you know it was tough. Yeah it's hard. And then my buddy came over and and we realized because you know he had already had two kids and we're and he's like dude the first year is just survival and like you know me and my wife like you know we we were you know doing things that we had no idea saying things to each other we had no idea what we're saying blah blah blah I was like you guys I was like really I was like I had no idea that you guys would even go through that. We didn't realize it until we had the you know we could relate that we were both you know parents but like he never told me that how tough it was because it just looked like it was easy and that everything was perfect. Yeah you know on the outside and then when we really got talking I found out like oh my god a lot of things about him that I didn't know and yeah and what it was like he's like dude first year is just survival first year of everything first year of everything and once I heard that I was like damn you're right all right let's we can get through this and then after that first year from that point on oh my god every day is just has been such you know such a blessing and we're having so much fun you know now and it also helps that we're sleeping some more yeah you know that that's big it's a real thing it's big and I was I was the guy that's like dude I don't sleep very well I never have you know my mind just always going and so I thought I was like this is perfect for me I was like I'm gonna have no problem doing this because you realize you actually do sleep okay more than I that never realized I was like damn I was like this is gonna be easy I already don't sleep and then when it went down I'm like never mind yeah it's also my experience when I had my first kid my daughter who's now almost 18 it's a deep deep it gets so real the biggest success I've had in my life has been being able to stay married which is was just hard yeah like constant work and yeah and figuring things out and then being able to be a present dad who like his my kids talk to me and we have a relationship and like we have this also didn't have but also I come from like dysfunctional people who didn't have the tools I think they wanted them but it was like a different time it wasn't therapy wasn't really like a it was kind of weird like if you go to therapy you have you have major problems actually that now it's way more normal for people to go yeah yeah I got a therapy I like it you know what I mean so um I think that it hit though hard when I had my kids and that was like when the real work began where I started working on myself and growing up you know and I think that um I think that you brought something in this world you owe it you know I feel like for me like I feel like I owe them to to try to be the best version of yourself you can be yeah and and you care so much you know and you know and you know parents I'm sure that come from you know those times like they they were trying but maybe they didn't have the right tools yeah you know and they couldn't just like go on tiktok and watch a video about some you know like oh yeah I guess I have that too you know but uh but there is good information out there that does help I find like I save videos that I find inside like helpful I get 20 of them a day from my wife yeah and just but when I get home I get the test did you did you watch you watch and I'm like yes she's like to the end I'm like hold on and then I get my phone I'm like okay because I usually I'll watch like half of it but well the funnier ones but like the you know the meaningful ones like she sends me a lot of the daddy daughter ones yeah which get me every time and half the time you know there's some really good information there you know to learn from but then half the time I think she's just trying to get me to cry yeah yeah because she knows like I'm a soft easy and I'm an emotional dude like I cried oh yeah I hear you cry easily at movies everything anything romantic you know love you know or uh it gets me and so she'll send me a video and I'm like it's eight in the morning you couldn't wait until you gotta get me crying this early okay so I watched the Instagram video the other day that said people who cry quickly are more intelligent really yeah because they have emotionally they get they're quicker because they they have a more uh faster processing emotional processing speed I hope that's true yeah I don't know I just I can't help it yeah and get it from my mom are you close with your parents uh yeah cool especially more now yeah it happens when you yeah like you know the there was a time when when you're when you're off and running you know that's all your priority is is your music yeah you gotta break away too from the and so you gotta find yourself talking less and stuff but then now that you know now that we especially since we have a kid and you know they they love being grandparents so it's it's cool to watch you know the joy that it brings them because I think in their heads they probably thought I was never gonna actually have kids because I waited till later to get married and it's actually though that that's on trend though like for me it was when I'm ready yeah when I know that I'm actually ready to get married you know and be a good husband and and you know not just focused on what I'm doing and having fun and career and all that kind of stuff uh so that's I was like I'm in I'm in a rush they didn't understand that yeah but I'm like it it'll come and I was ready to if I didn't meet the love of my life and like you know my wife I wasn't gonna do it how'd you guys I'll be single for the rest of my life I'd rather be single than force any relationship yeah I agree with that we met uh from a random rumor kind of so a rumor started online that we were dating oh wow and we didn't know each other that's pretty cool so we we eventually got down it's a long story like kind of how it happened was the guy that was doing my social media it's not like twitter and so I just was like all right if it needs to be done you know for music or whatnot you know obviously I was like so we had somebody doing that's smart and they uh I was on a tv show with miz and uh I think because I was on a show with a wrestler he was thinking okay it's good you know we should start liking all the wrestler stuff since you're on a tv show with one of the wrestlers and so he specifically started liking all of you know Alexa's uh tweets right so meanwhile she's that you know on her tour doesn't know me I don't know her she shows she's taking screenshots she's like yo that's Ryan Cabrera guys liking like everything I tweet yeah meanwhile he's obsessed yeah and I had no idea because I don't even know how to get on to her so that's going down you don't even know your login had no idea I don't and so that was going down me well she literally has a screenshot still on her phone and she was showing all the other girls in the locker room like yo this guy like I think he's married to Ashley Simpson but he keeps liking all my shit she always you know she tells everyone and so that was going down and eventually she wrote and she was like haha like all right so well the rumor started and she's like I heard we're dating and so that guy hit me and he's like yo Alexa Bliss just wrote you I'm like what is and so I looked her up I was like oh shit I was like what's my twitter info and so I logged on and wrote her back and then we started chatting and now I happened to be on an airplane to Orlando to perform at Epcot that day on the plane chat for five hours you know shared you know we had mutual friends you know Jeri from Bulling for Soup she did they wrote a song about her and you know me and Jeri had been friends I used to open for them back in the day and so like we had all these things in common you know we love Disney we love you know eating cereal at night you know like all these random things and I was like dude this girl's badass like what the hell and so I was like well you know hopefully we get to chat again sometime I'm landing right now in Orlando and she's like oh I live in Orlando what are you doing tomorrow and so she's like I don't know I was like well I'm before me you know four nights at Epcot you know if you want to come to one of the shows and so she came to one of the shows and we met she wanted nothing to do with me I kept you know being persistent and oh really she was like I think she thought you know like why is this guy you know he who lives in Los Angeles you know the singer what what does he want to hang out with me for you know and I'm like dude she was super sweet she's a beautiful girl and I was like dude this is what I've been looking for you know her personality like what she was like I was like this is not easy to find so for me I was persistent because I knew you know how hard it was to find somebody you know in the entertainment business you know does you know what I do and you know it's super humble you would never know you know she does what she does you know like okay these are all and we you know we loved all the same things so uh I did we we kept meeting up uh I had kept having shows where she was on tour and I just kept happening and happening and it was you know honestly you know like a fate kind of situation that's really sweet it's very random that that next week I'm like well I'm gonna be in Chicago doing Thanksgiving Day parade she's like oh I'm gonna be in Chicago doing raw oh like all right and then that next week I was like I'm gonna be in New York doing something she's like oh we're at MSG like cool as I your fates were tied yeah that's and you know I've never been one to like you know be too too into that kind of stuff until it started happening and then I'm like dude and you won't even believe it's like literally the next week I'm like I'm going home uh to Texas to visit my family for Christmas she's like oh I'm going to Texas to film the bowling for soup music video I'm like all right well you can't get rid of me now and it worked out and then she's she seems cool she's super sweet one of the nicest humans I've ever met Nick has a story Steve oh I have a friend from kindergarten Stephen Cornish he loves Alexa Bliss he's told me about her for probably the last five years so he probably hates me no no you get a lot of those Steve he's a nice guy all right yeah we're good Steve do you get any hate from like super fans of hers the amount of death threats I've gotten since that really oh so it was especially in the beginning and it went a lot of like uh three years ago we had had to get a stalker put in jail so it took over a year to get it happen but he was like showing up at our house in the front lawn I was so I was getting all these death threats on on Instagram and like a lot of and a lot of it got too detailed of like where we lived and all these things and he thought he was married to Alexa yeah he's an unwell person something something was going on and he sent you know from what he said like over $400,000 who knows where and he thinks that it was me like cat fishing him or something I got all this money and he was like we're not actually married Hendricks actually isn't my kid or something whatever it was it was crazy but like all the death threats were real and I was leaving the house one day and I'm going to golf with my dad for his birthday and I saw a dude in camouflage in the bushes no way across from the house that's that's scary it's a little weird and there's duck hunters you know back behind her house I was like hey maybe he's a camouflage because he's a duck hunter but why is he sitting in that bush I don't know a little weird to me so I texted my wife and or called her and she was home alone I'm like hey just be on the lookout just keep the doors locked because there's so many bushes out there I don't know it just seems a little off and she zoomed in or so it gets her to banging on the door and she thought it was like her Uber Ease but I was like you know she luckily didn't answer it and we eventually found video footage it was you know him and so I came straight home got in the house and then call the police he wouldn't leave he just sat down no this is in Florida that's freaky he just sat down on the lawn across the way and he's this is the guy that was you know sending all these death threats and stuff but nobody takes it seriously until it's too late and I was getting him out here too at the LA house you know he found the address and was saying I'm coming to your house I had to put I had the chief of police come to the house and it was yeah you can't play around with that no because dude you never know they could be like I don't not play around with stalkers and no I don't play around with it too many bad things have happened to too many people and it's just too easy but um ended up you know they they got him and they got dude it's just scary you know once you have your kid I'm like once you have a kid yeah I mean like she was a baby baby too so she would have been holding the baby at the door it would have been face to face but it's got but you know and he knows what people are going to do but yeah it gets it gets scary with like that world because you know you you stole our girl but wait what yeah yeah I know yeah we're married it's kind of fucked up how very fucked up with did it can be you know the the downside of the entertainment success which is what I say like I always say fame is like this byproduct of creating things that people like and then you have to manage that as a stressor it's it's not not something that is celebrated by anyone who's ever had it it's more like managed and and the people who do it gracefully I've always kind of you look out across the world and you see how everyone handles their success right and I think we all whether we admitted or not we kind of internally like watch and and whether it's us judging or us taking notes or us wondering I wonder how I would handle that right because we're all having different experiences and different levels of different kinds of fame because it's some people are famous for being a singer while others are actors and some are politicians and some are whatever right yeah and they're gonna handle it differently and I think that the downside of it is that there isn't a lot of sympathy for the dangerous part of it which is people who aren't well getting obsessed and then we've seen it play out so many times like whether it's John Lennon or all the way to now like there's too many times to count on it just to call on to say no you have to take it seriously because that's the world we live in yeah and now with the connectivity we have because of social media there's a lot of access to you get to anybody anyone yeah and that's why it's dangerous to go into your DEMs and stuff you I don't I just tell people I wouldn't do that I do not because it's dangerous because people there are sick people that can you know find you it's not it's not healthy to like just to read you know whatever all you know the onsite because you have the good but you have you know just the bad as well and it's just like it's not for me it's just it's not helpful you know it's not productive to go through it so I don't even think it's different but like even with like when people are like you know take pictures and stuff you know I used to care like do you look okay blah blah and then you know past the years are like I'm fucking careful what am I gonna do I'm 46 years old like what's the point pictures are you saying I don't fucking care yeah but it's it's self-conscious because I used to as well like I was really self-conscious and I didn't like the way I looked so when someone took a picture of me I did not meet it with a smile I met it with a frown because I didn't want my picture taken because I didn't like how I looked now people probably perceive that the opposite of the opposite of it is going through his own thing self-esteem is a thing and and then you work through it and you get to a place where you're like you know what I accept myself yeah however I look I'm doing okay I'm 46 I'm trying my best I've got two kids I'm not gonna always be a physical specimen of a man you're not always gonna be this handsome Jim where I have some days I got my days where I feel like I don't look good and then I got days when I'm like okay you can leave the house you know yeah but you learn to kind of like let it go because you're like what am I gonna do well outside of you know just being healthy because you want to be healthy and feel good and and you want to look good just you know because but you can't help the way I do like I can't control you know other than you know just trying to sure but like I can't control my face it is what it is and yours is yours and yours is theirs and you didn't do anything special to earn that so all I can control is you know how I treat people yeah you know and for me as long as I do that when I treat people you know well and with love then I'm fucking crushing it yeah I actually that's why I stopped you know through like really you know letting it affect like oh I don't look good you know it's like who cares I I took a picture with person because they asked and I you know maybe made their day that's all it fucking matters yeah like I'm so I had a funny look on my face or yeah my yeah because people will take a picture of you looking like with your eye closed and you'll be like oh my god what are people gonna think of me and then you start like well nothing's gonna change whatever and then also when you have kids it's great because it really does force you to not care because you're chasing some three year old around and yeah I didn't even fucking look at what I was wearing that day because I was busy taking care of my kid or doing whatever so I think that's a healthy thing it's a good thing but um it's a funny business like that too when you have kids you're like for in a in a wife I'm like do you guys like this is my kid like you know is it making her happy like you know so the now I get I have like that like I'll write a song and I'll play it for Lex and obviously you're gonna write what you're right but I do care you know for that's like the opinions that I care about now how do you guys um like what's it like resolving a conflict with a wrestler who depends you know there's I know when to shut up yeah you know yeah uh no I mean she's so she's so sweet you know but yeah I'm sure the only time you know things get aggressive is when we're sleeping okay because it's she'll be in her sleep and I don't know if she's like I think she's in the ring or something and I'll get like a whack to the face oh wow yeah and it got to the point to where like I'll just be fuming in bed because I don't wake her up but she'll pop me and I'm I'm like mad because I'm like half asleep delirious but I'm mad because she didn't apologize if you didn't say you're so I wake up I think you have anything you want to say to me she's like what like you pop me in the face less nice square in the nose she's like I don't know like you didn't say you're sorry it happens a lot how would you say all your experience in I would say the last 20 years or more 25 years has it started what did I get I got signed in 2003 yeah so 22 years okay let's call it that for 25 right so in 27 you'll be eligible for the rock and roll hall of fame if you look at it that way okay first record in 2002 2002 2005 2004 2004 2004 okay so yeah man 25 years from the first record would be 29 but that's 20 some odd years of experience yep what would you say of what you achieved what you experienced as an artist and in your in your career lends itself to the complications and the challenges of marriage and parenting the deeper to question because don't you feel like what you're up against when you're trying to make it in a career is complicated oh my god and there's nuances to all of it and there's pressure and you want to get it right and then you get into this marriage thing and you want to get it right right then you get into parenting and you want to get it right I do feel like all the good all the bad everything that I went through in my career the disappointments and the highs the lows the lows are what no one ever sees but they did set me up to be a little more resilient yeah in the marriage that's what yeah that's that's what I was thinking I was thinking just being able to fail you know being able to have the lows you know and have those experience of those you know and understanding how you come out of that so because you're either going to stay in that low and that's you know what's going to lead to divorce or whatever but if you understand and you've been through it enough you know like what we you know grew up doing was this crazy music industry that you have no idea what it's like until you're in it and what you thought it was going to be like and this is kind of full circle to what I was saying earlier when we had the baby what I thought it was going to be like versus what it was actually like was to completely different things so you had to learn to adapt you had to learn you know you had to figure it out and that's the same with marriage and a baby what I what you think it's going to be like you know versus what it's actually like two completely different things but you know yeah the failures are it was the most important stuff along the way because then it led me to appreciate as well and be in the moment and be present when I was you know getting the highs successful so now like being married like not taking those little things that you have together for granted you know not just thinking like okay we wake up every day and today's just a day you know that's what kind of the music industry let me believe because during the time you you especially when you're on the rise and things are going well you never think it's gonna end and you're a little bit careless because you you don't think it's impossible whether it be with you know you are the money whatever whatever it is you it's like it's never gonna like you're always gonna be on the high yeah only age teaches you that yeah yeah I'm gonna say I had the same experience you you get on that first wave and you're like well this is great this is how it is this is how never gonna end yeah and then you then you're cold and you're like oh yeah this is how it is and then you you work back up yeah and then when you get that how much more do you understand and you appreciate and realize that it's not this isn't normal this isn't every day so that I mean that's one thing in like having a kid and ever in marriage is like you know there's days where it's like I was in like Marshall's the other day and the baby and it was just me with a baby and the baby had a crazy blowout and she's kicking and she was throwing her shit at me and like all this stuff and I was like I was about to have a breakdown like what the hell is going on it was it was you know it was it was dad here trying to dude it's not I've been there but I had to remind myself like still how lucky I am you know because I was I was bent like what the hell is this sucks all of it then after like you know what what it's fine and every guy who has a kid who takes them out we've all been all gone through it yeah but I mean I think the thing that you know the industry and everything you know playing back to like the top of the most was just to appreciate the the little things that you think is normal like every day like waking up you know or like little things that you can do with your wife or baby you know that is a blessing and actually appreciating it and you do get I think more joy out of every moment including what now in my career I think when I have a moment or something's going well I take it with a grain of salt I enjoy it but I don't put so much weight into it needing to be anything else right and I can still go home and participate and it's not about me it's not about what's you know if the song is top five and or this or that or the show was so big or whatever it is I could still go home and just be dad however works going good or bad if it's if we're if it's cold and nothing's going on and it's really hard I can still go home and be happy yeah and and leave it there like it's going well I can still go home and be happy and leave it there yeah you know because it's kind of the same you don't want to bring that energy home to your now they didn't they didn't do anything to get that version you know it's like yeah that's good that you have that balance because that's it took time yeah that's hard but it's cool as an unconditional love it yeah that's dope to be able to go back to a place where they don't give a shit yeah you know if you have a whatever is going on yeah it's cool it's cool man I'm happy for you yeah same thank you yeah would you say that coming back to music from family life you know the back and forth would you say that it is different than before like would you say that you're that you've noticed anything about yourself that's maybe more present with the family what's weird is you know it's it's that double it's sort of like I love performing so much like I don't you love it I could never stop okay I do but then when you know when then I'm about you know doing shows that I miss you miss home miss home and then when I get home I'm like I'm itching I can't wait to get back down the road and then I get there and I'm like oh I can't wait to be home so how many shows a year do you think you do um it's hard to say now maybe like maybe like 80 damn that's a lot of shows yeah I mean but it was an awesome you know DJing as well so between that and well that's enough we're doing you gotta love it to do that many I still look forward to every show that's awesome I don't know just I love when dude COVID was the weirdest thing for me ever because I I don't know if there's something like I like I'd need to be in a crowd or before I don't know what it was I was just a weird time for me so like that I was like I still love it that's awesome to hear that but I you know also I want to find other stuff I want to be creative in other ways too and like you know not always be away because that's tough right but I just can't help it I don't know that's a good thing though I think when you love what you do um I'm conflicted with it yeah I don't hate it but I'm so anxious and then once I do it I feel great but it's the lead up to the show it's it's painful I kind of like that I'm working on it for me like it's one of those things just makes me feel something like whatever that angst it like even yeah it's cool it's like a focus you have yeah almost yeah I don't it's something to get through like can I can I get through the angst can I get through the nervousness um and then when you get out there and you do it I'm like oh shit you know because now I'm at a point where like I'll allow myself to like be proud of myself mm-hmm for certain things yeah you know that's interesting in it yeah like word before how long did that take oh man maybe you're like halfway through maybe like 10 years yeah that's interesting I don't know I never thought about that I didn't really let myself feel proud of myself either for maybe ever even now maybe I never thought about that yeah something that do you have a therapy I haven't you haven't no ever no life life's your therapist like yeah do you ever think about it uh I have actually yeah and I'm not like a poster I just you never really dove in just never really was like hey okay I found someone right like how do you even find one yeah that's the question right yeah like where would I go and for me now especially like how much we travel like how little you know time there is like okay I still I'll try to find time for things I love but then also you know being full-time dad and then also being on the road and then it's like when you find time to write songs whatever I find time to work on a DJ set you know like all that's like kind of the balance right now but just experience has kind of been therapy for me I guess you've been there advised by experience and who knows if it's good or bad or right or wrong I don't don't know but you know I'm in a I'm in a good place right now you know thanks for coming on dude dude I've been watching this I saw I've been stoked about it awesome man thanks for coming I saw Ryan my buddy Ryan was on here so I was like oh hell yeah I did the jacket zipped up in an honor of Ryan with his Prada jacket on oh yeah I saw where I was like yeah I was like I'll do my T-Mu jacket just for Ryan Ryan's nice I like Ryan yeah well we have yeah we have a lot of history together that's been cool to it's funny the interesting like roller coaster of that because that was part he lived with me we lived two houses together oh wow yeah I really like him we never knew we like got to know each other and now we have this like really nice budding friendship just because we came on the show okay and like but I've always been a fan of his band like I was always I think yeah we were we were just friends and I didn't really know much about and then when he did his hiatus he was out in Atlanta and I was playing his show so he lived with me out here we had blast it was wild times in studio city and then I don't know Sherman Oaks wherever but then I was he kind of hadn't talked to him in years I was like the band broken up and he was out in Georgia and then I was playing a show in Atlanta I was like dude I'm in the area you want to come out he came out play with me I was like what do you know too he's like I'm chopping down trees what the fuck you doing chopping down trees he's like dude I got a paid bill whatever I was like you need to get your ass back to LA like you were way too talented to be chopping down trees like that just it was insane and so I got him a job at Draze at the W oh wow I got a job at Draze call some buddies and then he moved back in with me and then started the band again and started playing shows and then I went back and saw him and they're selling out thousands and thousands he's playing so I was like I won't tell anybody that you were chopping down trees I really felt like that part of his story which I didn't know made me like him more because he was willing to go get a job and it was real that was when I had the most respect for you know him you know as a bud the fact that he was willing to do that because I was just like dude I'll get you I'll get you job in as like who cares what you're doing make enough you know live at the house you got to pay something and get out and get something and yeah you're not in the right you're not where you need to you're supposed to be you know yeah it does it would look at his story his story is so inspiring you know yeah I just feel like it made me like him more I just love love the idea that this guy felt like he needed to go work with his uncle and his cousin chopping down trees and like like it doesn't make sense to me right but like it made me like him more because he did something that he felt he needed to do and I think he was on some other journey I don't think it was about just a job and money I think he was on some like spirit walk but which would I which I think we do in life sometimes and we don't realize we're doing it we think a failure is a failure and it's not it's actually us going off into some quiet place to reimagine or learn something about ourselves and then to hear that he came he lived with you and he worked at Drace makes me like him even more because where where do you not want to fucking wait tables or serve people or or be a host or do whatever Hollywood yeah especially after you've been successful yeah so that makes me that makes me like him more because I'm like a lot of respect there's a lot of uh something there I'm like and not just humility it's like it's almost like he needed to get back in touch with some part of the of some reality that he needed to touch again or something I don't know but whatever journey he went on to learn the lesson humble you out or yeah or whatever it was he did it and look at the result he's now I think he's living his best life and continuing yeah now our kids get to grow up together too yeah we're out he's out in Florida as well yeah so kids at the same age we'll go to Disney together it's crazy it's all full circle right look at this journey we've been on together yeah and he's got experience yeah so it was not like you didn't know who yellow card was they had multi platinum records to go from that to working these jobs to come back and build again a huge touring career uh credibility and music all that it's just to me is like a story that I like yeah and so it makes me just like him more it was a very first city I've had a tower records yeah I moved to Los Angeles well I moved in Ceno and there was a tower records right there in that gallery yeah CD ever bought there it's the old card record that's sweet yeah and now you guys are good friends yeah well thanks for coming on the show this is fucking awesome awesome man it was an honor good luck with the music thank you brother and uh congrats on the family thank you you got a you got a beautiful the portrait yeah I appreciate you guys are a cool couple thank you it's a cool like family it's cool vibe yeah it's fun it's uh it's never a dull moment yeah it's cool man I'm happy for you thank you very much let's do it again some time all right thank you for watching artist friendly if you like this episode please make sure you hit the like button you follow the channel and please share it with your friends we appreciate the support that is why this show exists because you listen to it thank you guys we'll see you next time