Only Mintzy Could Get Away With This On A Plane: The Yak 2-11-26

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. The Act brought to you by Stella Blue Coffee. Caffeinate, curiously. is our go-to coffee here at Barstool Sports. Should be yours, too. Go to StellaBlue.com. That's right. That's exactly right. Did you just come up with a new slogan for him? Caffeinate curiously? I like that. No, it kind of sucks. Well, that would make more sense if Stella was a cat. Right. I'm drinking some right now, and I've got a lot of questions. Do you? Go ahead, give us one. What's a question? That's me being curious. We understood what it was. We were giving you the opportunity to continue it. We were improv-ing. Sure. Yes, and what's up with the moon? Kate, we've got to send you... That's accurate. We should send you an improv class. I'm surprised you have. She's definitely done. You have to have been improv-ing. In New York, way before Barstool, I did improv. I was on an improv team called Small Faces. We performed in Brooklyn a bunch. Really? We still have our old photos and a Facebook page or something like that. Why were you the small faces? We don't know. we couldn't come up with a name we actually all had pretty big moon like faces so you're thinking of a different name brandon small what you said no i don't know what i was i was i was being curious would you like stand in a line with like your fellow improvers and they would call out a prompt like oh let's see the give me your worst mailman yeah then you step up or let the audience give us one let me get a little maybe like garden hose yeah you had nothing for garden hose you just say no trying to yeah trying to find the right topic brandon has has whose line aged well so i think the um i think the drew carry one has i cannot be less interested in the one that is owned currently but it's the same form it's the same guy same carry wasn't and he wasn't that funny no he wasn't that funny i don't know why show i i just i think those improv guys had about a four or five year window where it was going to be great and now they're still doing it i bet it's as funny as it ever was i just have no interest in watching it but colin mockery is coming to keegan in about a month and i'm gonna go is he gonna be improv-ing it's uh mockery and sherwood and they're gonna be doing a two-man improv show and in my mind i'm gonna sit front row they're going to call me up i'm going to kill it and i'm going to join them for a three-man show the next night and i'll be on their i'll be on the show by the fall did you dream of being on who's line i did were you picking up household items i i i fucking loved who's line what would you have wanted to be the guys who like arms they control or no i want to be one of them there's no way you couldn't do hoedown i couldn't do hoedown i couldn't do the rap game i couldn't do hoedown i couldn't do any of the music any of the music would have been tough the music the music would got me um who's your favorite so i i like ryan i i go back and forth between ryan and colin only two correct answers i think colin i think colin's funniest but i think ryan made more sense to me tall guy you know yeah yeah fun hair and and ryan and the old british ones with uh with clive on comedy central ryan was funnier than colin colin something happened to colin over the years ryan ryan doesn't look funny but then he is funny and that takes you off guard Colin it looks like he could be a funny guy. Yeah. So when you see him you're like yeah this guy's gonna be funny. Yeah. Ryan just looks like any old guy. And then he's funny. And then he's funny. Where did that come from? Funny as fuck. Oh my god. Is our funniest looking barstool guy the funniest? Who's the funniest looking barstool guy we got? Mincy. Who looks the funny? No. No that's not it. Who looks like he ought to be funny? Meek Phil looks like he ought to be funny. Meek Phil looks like he should be funny. But he's not funny at fucking all. he's not he's never tried to be funny has he no no that's what i'm saying it's not it's not in his bag but he looks like it would be in his bag it's mincey it's mincey no no no not funny looking right right right looks funny looks like they would be funny you look at it like you look at chris farley you know that motherfucker's gonna be a funny guy you go to see a stand-up you've never heard of chris farley you've never you know nothing he walks out on stage you're in for a treat even if His stand-up's not good. You're like, this guy's going to be really funny. You're chuckling a little bit. Who is our funniest-looking guy? You look at him in the bar and you say, oh, that one right there? That has to be funny. That's the funny guy of the group. I feel like T-Bob has a little bit of, like, that guy's a cut-up. Okay. Like, you look at him, he's got kind of like a boyish face, but he's got, I don't know. I feel like guys that have that longer hair, a little bit of a cut-up. Long, bold cut. Now, what about Che with the Jaguar hair? Does he look funny? No, no. Okay. if i'm in a bar i see him i think i think he might be a funny guy i think you just think gay asian no i think like uh like a yeah like a wiry guy but with like big hands and like a kind of like a sideways head danny lance no ethan ethan yeah he looks like an 80s comic i did think ethan was going to be funnier than he turned out to be. Ethan, like, raising one eyebrow in his headshot. Yeah. Putting that outside the comedy. In a vertically striped, multicolored shirt. Perfect. We got Ethan tonight. Two shows, actually. Yeah, and he could just go by Ethan. I'd be like, that's funny. I wonder if he's ever done stand-up. Who's the least funny-looking guy, and why is it White Sox Dave? White Sox Dave just looks, yeah, he looks pissed. Angry person. So was he on the flight today? Yeah, it's the guys that are like the liaisons that went out early. The liaisons plus Mincy. Yeah. Mincy's getting it done though, right? Yeah, I think, but they're just going to an island beforehand, doing like a travel vid on an island. Doug, I wouldn't be surprised if Doug had a flower on his shirt that squirted water. Doug looks funny. He looks like a guy who would zap you in the hand thing. Yeah. did you broke down the picture this morning no we haven't i saved it for the yak i uh all i know is i i told you guys four and five years ago that this this was who he was nobody believed me king of the south king of the south and this this picture this it's the most stunning piece of artwork i've ever seen in my entire life i think it's shocking to people maybe outside of the walls but inside of the walls i don't think you're shocked at all no but even so even though you know who he is and what he's about this is even shocking for him i know it's not this is he reclined the seat for no reason yes but it's we've known this forever he okay the feet are out in the aisle the shoes are off the belly's out he's leaning on goldfinger he's leaning on goldfinger he's leaning across two seats his seat is reclined inconveniencing the person behind him for no reason whatsoever uh i there's 50 things wrong with this should we rank them i think the reclined seat makes me you think that's the mad that's number one just because it's serving him no purpose and also making the person i'm sorry i think it's behind i think it's feet in the aisle you go to the bathroom or you're pushing the beverage cart and and like the feet are all the way in the aisle you got to go around him shoes off and feet in the aisle if you're gonna Take your shoes off. You got to hide the feet away. Yeah. Creating an obstacle in the aisle. Yes. Inconvenencing two people. The hand on the head is like. He's like posing sexy. He's expecting head. He's a head getter. He's expecting head. He's dreaming about head right now. He's a confident head getter. Even like the sweatpants, the easy access. Yeah. How does Goldfinger allow this? I think Goldfinger fell asleep first. I don't think he did, yeah. Was it a slow slump? So he saw a sleeping Goldfinger and said, that's a pillow. Yes. Yep. But I think that's the most a person can be to Mincy. A pillow for him. A piece of furniture? Yeah. I appreciate the person in front of Mincy being like, fuck this guy behind me. And also reclining and fully relaxing. Is it okay if Goldfinger's not there? Yes. It's way more okay. The reclined seat's still bananas. Yeah, but as long as he's more out of the aisle. Yeah, because then he's more out of the aisle if the whole finger's not there. Because I feel like people do that all the time. Way more okay. Ryan Whitney quote-sweeted it. I don't think Wit likes him at all. Did you see him? Yeah. I think it was just pretty straight up. He's like, this guy sucks. No other commentary. That sounds like a gunshot victim would fly from Afghanistan. yeah in commercial i i want you guys thoughts on this i'm team never recline your seat on a plane i don't do it i don't recline at all i don't think anybody should recline i mean how much are you really gaining by going back you're not getting anything it's more it does more harm than good it's only going to inconvenience it inconveniences someone else way more than it conveniences exactly right and and i i don't think you should ever touch that button and anybody that does, I will push him with my, but I'll do this a lot and kick the seat a little bit. And if you're pro seat lean back, picture yourself when somebody leans back their seat in front of you. You roll your eyes every time. Can you believe this guy? I always think of Pat. What happened to him when someone leaned back? Oh, his laptop. That was the craziest thing. That's a nightmare. Somebody, he had his laptop open on a plane, was working, the seat behind him reclined really fast, and it just crushed his screen. It just broke his screen. Jesus. Yeah, nobody's like sitting normally and saying, I can't, God, I can't fucking sleep. And then you recline that far. That's way better. But yet reclining that far fucks up everything for the guy behind you. Everything. Especially if they're, you know, a fully grown adult man. Who's sleeping over two chairs. To be fair, the guy in front of him is reclined too. He is, he is. But I think that... That guy's getting head too. Everybody's getting head. I like to think that guy saw what Mincy was doing. It was like, I'm absolutely reclining. It's a free problem. I would, yeah. This guy just flat out sucks. He looks kind of cool is what I'm saying. I know. Because that's how Rick Ross would get a blowjob. Not caring conveys his cool sometimes, and he just doesn't care. But he doesn't know. He never cares. Right. He doesn't have a care about anybody else bone in his body. outside of letting Deutsch stay at his apparently immaculately clean apartment. He had a cleaner come before, right? Still. Had to have. Still. Well, he's never there. No, but it's running pure with the happiest guy on the plane, Goldfinger, and an empty middle seat for a 10-hour flight. Moments before disaster. Oh, look how soft those seats are. Or is that? Yeah. It looks like velvet to me or something. It looks kind of old. Velvet? The 80s. It looks 80s. Oh, that's nice. That's ideal. Hmm. well it is a i would assume an at least an eight hour flight i don't know eight ten then they have to go to i think they're are they going to do it yeah it's a shitty flight but you you went to first did you not yeah i upgraded instantly did you have like a bed on the way there no on the way back yes there was one was an older plane okay so just like a fully reclined That's just an easy, I don't really care what it costs upgrade. Yes. If you're going to Denver, you think about it, you're like, I could probably stay in two or three hours, but 10 hours if you've got the opportunity at all. What's your barrier? Like four hours? Mine's more price point. If it's $60 when I'm flying back to Pittsburgh, I do it, but it's still no difference. That's kind of the opposite than what Brandon said. Mine's a price point. The further it's, the more expensive. Mine's how long you're going to be on a plane. Yeah. I won't spend more than a grand No I won't I think I spent a grand for LA Yeah I just I want it It's so much nice It's such an expensive trip anyway It was worth it Just go ahead and eat it Redirect or did you stop in LA? Stopped in LA I've never sat first class still How long is it from LA to Hawaii? Six? Five ish five five five and change i think i want to say yeah about five and change five sounds right yeah yeah anything anything over three i think is you got to do the best seat you can possibly the first class guys want to talk about like uh the meals and like the yeah yeah food experience i i like pre-ordering but sometimes you forget and it sucks when when you forget that like i i guess i don't understand you got to hold some of the pre-orders back for those of us that forgot you know mark you feel like you feel like a hobo when you get on there and you didn't pre-order and they act like oh i don't know what we're gonna have where we're right you're just gonna be stuck with whatever they have these pre-order exclusives brandon i'm like why are you making them exclusive why can't you just throw like throw throw three or four more chicken parms on that just make that the meal yeah or just make the whole meal that yeah right oh it's awful is it ever good though no bad chicken yeah the best part is the banana pudding i think they're always better. I think my expectations are so low, the meal is always surprisingly good to me. Yeah, I think so too. I think the roll surprisingly hits. The roll hits. The roll hits. The roll always. Kate, right? Kate, picture of it. I bet that's sick. Kate loves her one screen waffle mini Dr. Pepper. Guys like those chocolate quinoa circles they give you? It's very sick. They get melty though. They melt all over. They give you champagne automatically? Before the flight takes off. Every time you're in first class? If you want it. But then you have to give the cup back before you have to finish it before it takes off. Oh, I kill it. Do you? Yeah. I like the feeling. I was talking to Feidelberg. This was his first flight since he was taken off the first class list. And he's like, it's borderline negligent on them to not give you anything in the back. He's like, that's six hours of just malnutrition. Yeah, man. That's kind of true. No meal. Six hours. Nothing. It's like, yeah. They give you the free headphones that have your ears gaping. My shit was loose afterwards. I mean the hand towel I don't know what to do with that It's such a hot hand towel It's so hot and it's so good It's so perfect You don't know what to do with it Nick? I shower with it I purposely don't shower before I fly You dab your face too right? I take my shirt off I feel bad when I dab my face with it Everybody else is just doing their hands I'm like touching every part of it more than one if you want it oh god Kate Kate I would say you should try it but I know what would happen you would give up your seat to a veteran you know what I know I would be chatty because I'd be like everybody would know it was my first time because I'd be like so what do you do that you're up here I know I'd be annoying and so it's better for me to be where I belong what else do they give you I'm shocked we all have the same job yeah I know but yeah feels When the wheels go up, everyone throws up their ones. What? Ones up. What? First class. First class. When you get first class, you do that. When the wheels go up, you do one. Wheels up, ones up. All right, ones. All right, ones. After you get off the plane, you all meet right there at the gate and do like a whoa team. The tunnel. I know every now and then a first class person will come back if their bathroom line is on and we all hold up our hands like this. Please, governor. Please. We don't accept those people back. Titus was holding his nose. I was. I was. He's holding me the little bit. I'm not joking. I was hoping he wouldn't notice, Nick. Nick started to walk by. I tapped his arm going past and he went like this. He's like, another hot towel, please. I swear to God, I don't know her. 32E touched me. Can I get like a bath? Posed me down. And then there's Ben Mints sprawled out over two chairs. That's what it's like back there. Animals. But I will say having no middle seat is almost as good. Yeah, I can see that. If you can lift. That's everything. Having no middle seat is perfect. It's great. Yes. Almost as good. Yeah. I'm trying to give Mints as much of the benefit of the doubt as I can. Why? Well, listen, that's why I said. Danny, how have you not learned? This is just. That's why I said the reclined chair pissed me off the most because he knows he reclined it. But like maybe he fell asleep and started moving around during his sleep and his feet eventually found their way. He started here. And then by the time he woke up, he was all the way down. I mean, yeah. What about what about shoes off, Brandon? I don't do it. I don't have the confidence to take my shoes off on an airplane. That's Annika. Got all the ladies doing it. Apparently, that's the move. Take the shoes off. He probably took some Xanax, which I'm not judging him for. It's a long flight. when his body turned into ambrosia salad naturally morphed into that position how how long do you think 10 hour flight do you think he was like that for 45 minutes you think he's like that for an hour or like seven hours yeah i think yeah i think the majority of it he has a one of one body it's it's yeah and mark i've never the motherfucker can run for an hour straight and his body still still is whatever it is. I've never seen anyone that looks anywhere close. At flag football he couldn't keep the belt up because he has no he's torso from belly button up and then nothing. Nothing. He needs a BBL while he's out there. He's like unfinished. But also too done. Too done. They ran out of material on the top and then just said just put him out there I guess. yeah maybe i'm maybe i'm joining your side danny where i'm giving him giving him the benefit of the doubt is his body just does not fit in any seat yeah like he's like he's got a body that just it's more like he has ever seen before he has a hard enough time controlling his body when he's up let alone when he's sleeping just trying to help ben it's also i maybe this happens once a week once a month but there's there's a universal quote tweet from barstool employees like somebody puts Donnie puts that picture out and every single one of us goes to it. Bo tweets it and gets a little bit of... I made my rounds this morning. This is what Tiffany Gomez saw. That's good. That's good. We got some other good ones? Any other... Mine wasn't good. I don't partake in those. You don't? You don't ever? I like the Whitney one of just being direct like I'm just fucking done with this guy. I retweeted his toilet seat this morning. That would have to hurt. How does that not pinch his ass? That's what I said. I said he's got to have like a phallus on his thigh. I don't think he shits like we do. But when you put weight on it. I had that in college, I think. It pinches you every time. Yeah. It can't not pinch you. Maybe he shits bowl up. But I get not wanting to deal with it. But I think my theory is he hasn't shit at his apartment. He only shits here. Yeah. What else is he going to do here? Because he sticks around. We get done with the yak. He'll get here. Let's say he gets here at 1130. We'll get done with the yak. He'll stick around an hour or two and run. And then I think he probably does all his other activities here. and then goes home. I do feel he gets all of the slob critique at the company when there is a lot of us who are massive slobs in a lot of different categories, including me. Yeah, me too. His apartment was cleaner than mine. Yeah, Kyle took the bullet there. He's like, including me, and then you pointed right at me and you. I was starting to say something, but I changed. I said his apartment's cleaner than mine. Okay, good, good, good, good. But what were you going to say? You're the fucking man. Thanks. You are too, brother. Thank you. What about the air mattress? Okay, great question, Eddie. What? You haven't seen this? No, the only thing I have seen is the toilet. I have not seen anything else yet because I wanted to save it. He has a picture of himself above the stove. I didn't see that. Not above the stove, on the stove. So this is it. Okay. Pause. All right. Look, that's a picture of him. What is on the floor? What am I looking at on the floor? I think that's Deutsch's bag. Yes. Okay, okay. That's him? Yeah. Coming into the apartment. We got the kitchen on the right. I like how Deutsch has nothing folded. That is him. It's a picture of him on the stove. Relatively clean. Besides everything I own. What's on his fridge? Like a C-minus paper. To the left, we have the bathroom. This is a nice apartment. Yeah. Old Spice body wash. Old Spice body wash for hands. Awesome. No toilet paper? Just a guy being a dude. Tub is really clean. Solid. Loofah. Solid shower. Pube razor. No toilet. Here we do have a bit of an issue. There is a cracks toilet. That is a big crack. And that's right where you'd be. It's cracked all the way through. How does that happen? Yeah. Now, yeah. The speed limit 18 is a little creepy, no? Well, that's an Ole Miss thing. Oh, it is. Okay. Right next to the bed, speed limit 18. Oh, God. No, that's Archie Manning's number, and that's their campus thing. Okay. Gorgeous view. His view is unbelievable. He's on the 32nd floor. Entertainment center. Oh, Mr. Wynn. He should have a bigger TV, though. Into the bedroom. Oh. And if these walls could talk. So he set up an air mattress so Deutsch didn't sleep in his bed? The theory is... I thought he was in a studio. The theory is he sleeps on the air mattress. You think? The theory is somebody stayed with him at one point, and it just became his new couch. Because he doesn't have a great couch. No. We think he just lays on there and watches TV. Oh. Huh. That's not a great couch. No, that couch sucks. But we're like nitpicking at this. We are. That's a good play. It's a beautiful play. That's fine. This is suspicious. It's like when you clean your house too well so then your parents know you had a party. Yeah. I think something's up here. Oh, if I was Cody Miles, I'd kill someone. I mean, wow. Oh my god. That's his view? He has a great apartment. Phenomenal place. A view that Charles Leclerc would have. It's like a perfect view. That's like the most ideal. That's such a good view. That was actually his? Yeah. Or is that like a roof? That's from his apartment. Look, you can look into Cliff Martino's house. You're in his living room bed and you turn right. You can see that view. It's like the perfect angle. Wait, you are kidding Cliff G. Martino said you can see into my house He said whichever window has all the bourbon bottles in it That's where he, not to dox Cliff G. Martino Let's find Cliff G. Martino's house Let's find the bourbon bottles in the window There's barely any windows in this shot Yeah, so start looking That's unbelievable I do wish we got the Mincy Billy Football apartment tour I know That was a sight to behold They were roommates They shared balconies They were adjoining apartments. But they, Mintz treated, from what I heard, Mintz had to go to Billy's house to sit down. He didn't have anywhere to sit. So he asked Billy for like to leave his sliding door open so he could go sit at Billy's. So a lot of times Billy would come home from work and Mintz would be sitting, like on the phone. Yeah. And Billy had a dog and Mintz would take care of the dog a little bit. I think so, yeah. It was a symbiotic relationship. But the chairs were Billy's part of it. Now that I think about it, He had the couch, but there's not a chair in there. There was a red chair. There was a red chair? Yeah. I didn't see a chair. A little red chair. So how does he go from that to this? To what? From not having a place to sit to having a pretty nice apartment. Really nice. Yeah, I don't know. I think that's just the cost of living difference because he was blown away. It was cheaper here than New York. Yeah, that apartment is $800 a month. No, it's not. No, it isn't. No, of course it's not. still still nice and once he gets his raise it's probably gonna he's gonna upgrade kate i've seen your place you gotta be pissed yeah i'm a little jesus christ a little more room to run around than i do but working on it it's okay i asked deutsch if he wanted because we just got some new furniture and i'm like hey do you need furniture for your place um because coffee table a couple chairs whatever he's like uh i don't know i think i'm good i think i think I can see Deutsch being a furniture-less guy. Oh, yeah. He's not into furniture. I don't think he wants to be tied down anymore. Right. He wants to be able to just get out. I almost felt bad for even asking. I was like, I have steps. Of course you did. Yeah. I don't think Deutsch has ever had furniture. Not yet. He's still young. He's still young. Yeah. By the way. A fresh-faced 38-year-old. Yeah, I don't know how old Deutsch is. Have we ever asked? No, I don't want to know. His age? Yeah. Yeah. He's told us. He's 38? It's like 36 or 37. Okay. I believe 37. Okay. yeah he's not ready for furniture yet no that's early he's a big folding table guy he would always have to order one in every city for his beer that's right hey do it's 38 seven 36 down six five five five oh you're a fucking kid 36 well i said six this lead Not very good clues. Or is that 15? You're 15? All right, see ya. See ya, Deutsch. Thanks, Deutsch. There's the boys. Did we not pay the light bill for that room? I don't know. I don't understand that. It's getting more depressing. Like, everybody in there is slumped over. The TV's on. You got all the light you need. Not for seeing them. Is this Che? Because Che walks around his house in the dark, he said yesterday. Are you in charge of the gambling game? Are you keeping it dark in there? Yeah, I do. It's fine. Sometimes Jack McArthur will turn the lights on and everyone will get mad. That's so weird. That is weird. Just hanging out in the dark? The lights are on in every other room. Also on the Yak, we look in there frequently. Turn the goddamn light on, Rick. That's a good look for them. It must be freeing to have. I don't know if that's T-Bob or somebody else. It is T-Bob. T-Bob. No things like that, though? like mincey could just pick up tomorrow and not have to worry about anything you're the complete opposite you're like hoarder mode yeah he's got nothing yeah what happens if you move brandon yeah you just get rid of all the shit fuck pack it all take it all pack it all how do you pack that you're not packing that you're hiring someone i'm hiring something but yeah but i'm definitely taking i took it that would take so long no yeah all those hell no no no bubble wrapping all your bobbleheads and shit? No. Are you throwing anything out in the process? Maybe a little but not much. Would you ever want to live in a bigger house or is that a size peak? So my issue, Kyle, is when I go back to Mississippi, whenever, you know, the next couple years when I go back, the house I have down there is like a little three bedroom, two bath ranch. I think I might have to buy a house just for my stuff. Or build an extra shop or something. I don't know. I don't have room for my stuff. Strictly for the stuff. Strictly for the stuff. I don't know what to do. I don't know what I'm going to do. Hopefully my mom dies the next couple of years. I'll just use her house. Fingers crossed. Yeah. There's this billionaire. I sent my goddaughter for Christmas got her tickets to this It a giant garage of this billionaire who lives in the Philly area And he ran out of room for his stuff So he just bought somewhere near the king of prussian mall like five this five acre garage and started filling it with all his shit And then he filled it with so much shit that he wanted other people to see it So now you could take a little trolley car through all this guy's shit And I feel like you ideally would have something like that someday. That would be amazing You could tour people through show people. Yeah Come look at my shit. Yeah, come look at my stuff and but it's really cool tj had an idea today that i think he's trying to hand it something at the national card convention this year he wants to get a table and wants me to sell some of my stuff at the table wants everybody not even just you just like yeah like a barstool like trading table or barstool wants everybody do a little swap meet or something garage sale yeah everybody can can bring i have some stuff i don't need you can come trade stuff speaking of thank you for the blade yeah of course i take that to tommy today yeah yeah it's a beautiful one it's a nice piece is it a real blade yeah but it's uh it's decorative so it's not it's dulled was it from the blade shop i sent you or somewhere else a different one i got him a yes it's uh like a katana okay very cool it's a nice piece hope he likes it i'll see today i'm sure he will he likes all manner of stuff that can kill you there's so much shit in here yeah it's bad yeah I'm just looking around. Has the joke gone on longer? It's not Kyle's fault, but didn't you wear this Elton John? Is that still here? The Dodgers, Elton John Dodgers costume. I was out of town. What's up with the armor and the sarcophagus? Yeah, what is that? I don't even really remember. That's Mikey Betts. Oh, yeah. It was in his house. It's mummy's seat. Can we remember the origin of everything? I'm looking at a Japanese cooking cookbook. What was that from? I can't know. I don't know why there's fucking purple hats on the wall. Oh, my God. We have the Malisek pictures. Oh, my God. Okay. That was so long ago. All right. Kate, where'd you get that hat? This hat has bubbles that shoot in front of it, right? Yeah, that was from the game. That was the rooftop game. The bubble hat guy. So we should have spring cleaning is what you guys are saying. I think the joke of my having this behind me Is pretty much gone We'll just get rid of all this I'll just take it home and put it in my house Okay What do you got behind you Kyle? A big jump rope I don't remember the jump rope either I think we did that once Our hit rate is low Also, how about all the wine we got? Yeah Is this from Ian? Yes This is his. Dude, I'm saying get rid of all the shit and let's turn the whole studio into a wine cell. It's just wine. Let's have Ian send us bottles of wine and we put those. That would look classy, too. Yeah. And we could keep the knight in shining armor in Mavacita for ambiance. Dude, I don't know. When I was at dinner the other night, I so badly wanted Ian to just be on call for me. And I know that's impossible and unfair to ask of him, but how sick would that have been? Just FaceTiming him? Just FaceTime him at dinner and you're like, Ian, I'm thinking, I'm thinking Tagliatelle. Like, what do I do with this? Yeah. Yeah. What do I do? Parmesan or something? Yeah. It's not impossible at all. Che, after his third glass of wine ever, was in touch with a master sommelier. That's true. And Che's like friends with him. Che's the worst guy we got. Che, are you guys like texting friends? We texted, yeah, we texted over the weekend. Yeah, it was more logistical. but yeah we're i think we're friends we hung out that night in san francisco if you were going to like a really nice restaurant on on saturday for valentine's day um and you're getting ready to order a glass of wine you kind of have an idea of what your entree is would you yeah would you have the balls to reach out to ian i don't know if i FaceTime him live but i probably would send him the menu and be like hey think in this what do you think consultant yeah yeah that would be sick Yeah, especially if we're getting a bottle. Keep him on retainer. I don't know what I'm doing. Brandon, have you texted Guy at all? No, the last person he texted was Mark. Oh, no. I'm waiting for – how long do you think we wait? The next text has to be from him, right? I think I'm going to wait until the draft and the Raiders take Mendoza. Yeah. I'm going to send Mendoza with a bunch of exclamation points. Brandon, send him a text right now. I don't think so. I don't think so, Nick. Yeah, there is a chance you're just like a grain of sand in the beach of his life. Yes, and I think that's exactly what... Do you think he would respond well to ladies and gentlemen, we got him? When Mendoza gets dragged? Are you going to send like the gif? Yeah. I think it's Mendoza with exclamation point. Mendoza with exclamation point? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I don't know. A grain of sand in the beach of his life is exactly right, I think. Welcome to Flavortown, Mendoza. He probably did legitimately... Flavortown's Columbus. Oh, he did enjoy us. He probably meets so many people. He enjoyed his time with us. There's no doubt about that. But once the time was over, I think there was the courtesy text and then he moves on to the next. Or maybe he just fucking loves us. I think he might love us. Yeah, he might love us. I think we might be at the ranch. What if everyone treats him like that and he's longing for male friendship and you guys are leaving him hanging? I'll be goddamn. Show some agency. Yeah. Yeah, start sending him memes. What about, welcome to football town. Mendoza's out of this world. That's a good one. Don't talk to him. Really good. You can send that. Welcome to football town. Because he says flavor town. Okay. I guess he does. No, I don't think he does say that. Okay. Yeah. Is he a similar age to you, Brandon? He's got to be older. No, I think he's like 10 years older, I think. I would put him at like 54, 55. Is there anything that you're into that you think he would be into because of your age? Yeah. Food. Non-food. Okay. He seems like a collectibles knick-knack guy. Yeah. Yeah. Show him the strawberry you pulled. I think he just collects things that cost upwards of millions of dollars. He's like a car guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then I collect 1987 Fleer cards. He collects Camaros. He's 58. 58 wow he's a good looking 58 did it look like he had any work done or anything no no Botox he looks thin he does did he look kind of ripped do you think he works out he takes care of himself he's got a nice tight body nice tight body but we'll see we'll see the next time he texts obviously the friendship is in it's infancy but it's going to be magnificent when's the draft April. Oh, you got it at least twice before that. You've got to go. I had to text him before that. I agree. Yes, you need to find something else. About what, though? Drafts coming up. Combined? Yeah. Mendoza's looking good. It's going to be Mendoza, right? There's no world that's not Mendoza. Yeah, yeah. So that's the problem is there's – it almost worked better in our favor if the Raiders didn't have the first pick. They're like the fourth or fifth, and then there's like a conversation to be had about who they're going to take. Ask about Crosby. It's a big hot topic right now. Oh, yeah. Where is he going to go? Well, what if he's mad that Crosby's leaving? Good. It doesn't sound like he is now. He's not leaving. Well, Kubiak's like kind of we want him, but who knows if that's real or not. They did just hire a coach. That's right. Ask him. Thoughts on Kubiak? I love him. I can't do it. I'm absolutely – no. Well, what if Titus does it and it works? I really – well, I feel like if Titus does it and it works, that's still good for – we're a team here. do you want him to like are we more than you we are no you're not i'm worried that we're not a team why wouldn't we we're a team if it's me if it's you are you gonna cut me in yeah you want to be cut in if i if i become bff with him you're gonna say we're a team now i there is a non-zero chance you're at his ranch without me that you just pop up at his brand i swear to god i'm not going to his ranch without you unless he asked me to i swear to god titus ain't no way huh send the text Titus? I'll send it right now. No. Diners, drive-ins, and Kubiak? He'll laugh. He's also a huge NBA guy. He's a Warriors guy, I believe. I'd be surprised if he's not at the All-Star game. Welcome to Fuliver Town. Mendoza out of this world. Yeah. Welcome to Football Town. Welcome to Football Town. Do you think any dudes were ever in this predicament with Jeffrey Epstein? When do I send him? They met him at a brunch. He's the fucking man. He feels like he was. Should I text him? With his business, it feels like he was text forward. Like you meet him and by one o'clock that afternoon, he's texting you. There should be an inverse list of people who like ghosted him or like didn't respond. The ghost list. People who didn't fuck with him, didn't text him back. That would be huge. Those guys probably feel great right now. They want the recognition. I would tweet out that screenshot. Yeah. If a guy, if you had a private, like, man, that guy, Epstein gave me the creeps at that, whatever. Straight to the top. That guy's bad news. Did you text him? I texted him, yeah. No, you didn't. Did you back out? What'd you text him? I said. You didn't say welcome to football town. I said, I'll tell you right now. I said, your boy winning a Super Bowl has got to be good for you guys. That's huge. Brandon, are you pissed? That's good. He don't like it. He don't like it at all, man. I thought we were a team. You want me to add you on the group? No, they can't be in a group. Just say Brandon agrees. You hit them with one right now. Can't hit them both at the same time. It's a coincidence, dude. Yeah, wait 15 minutes. And then we'll see who he texts back first. What do I hit him with? I don't know. Chase said something about NBA. I don't. He's a huge NBA guy. Huge NBA fan. He's in finals courtside all the time. I'm pretty sure he's Warriors. We've got to be certain. All-star game this weekend, huh? Yeah, I mean, that's good. All-star game this weekend, huh? Yeah, he's a Warriors fan. Has Mark been acting weird towards you lately? Mark hasn't texted this morning, has he? Bring up the Kaminga story. This is like, I love you, man. But you're both competing. Well, they don't compete in I love you, man. But I said if you were both competing. Right, right. But that's just a fundamental misrepresentation. You're right. There is no competition here. It's just Mark winning. No, no, no. But he didn't compete with anybody in I love you, man. It's just him. I feel like I added the caveat. at pretty i feel like you got a text i think he could ignore me i don't believe you texted i think he could ignore me i think if we both text him he's like i gotta hit these boys back show me that you text i don't believe you text why don't you believe i text you i know i i don't believe you texted i think you you head faked and you're you're you send the text and types of go you fool you've got me in the air right now you just head faked and i'm just jumping and yeah you in text okay that would have that would have worked yeah if it wasn't for that meddling nick right yeah i saw right through apparently guy fietti helped recruit kevin durant to the warriors is this a well-known story i didn't know no i didn't know that claims he helped recruit kevin durant to the warriors by texting katie's agent during the playoffs for a push to uh to push for the move actually now that think about it his his guy is a huge yakker there's no way no his guy who's guy guy's guy guy's guy one of guy's guys guys one of guys young guys ian shout out ian right it was ian right yeah shout out ian ian's gonna come to chicago and visit the yak and mostly one day uh so now everything we're doing might get reported to guy by guy's guy but not guy's main guy but guy's guy one of guy's guys yeah i think we're good just keep it cool and not like you're obsessed with it no we're not it's just it's cool it's whatever it's whatever is he an ohio state fan i think his fan he's got family that is so i think there's something there as well i don't know if he is just make sure what yeah sounds all right okay all right so so we're we're we're settled good aligned yeah what i said aligned good good What would you do, Ed? I think, like, so when was the last time you guys had contact when you shot the... We shot on Thursday. My last text was Friday. I think Titus was Saturday, I think. I was Friday. You were Thursday. Oh, I was Thursday. You were that night because you forgot your bag. Yeah. And then I was Friday. Yeah, I think a couple weeks. Okay. A couple weeks. Ed, I bet you have some pretty unique numbers in your phone. Yeah. Want to trade? Let's do a swap. uh not not nothing crazy to be honest who's got who's got the most famous person who would answer i have i have dan cats uh-huh that's mine oh dave but he's on vacation but dave wouldn't answer me they wouldn't answer i don't think dan would but he's probably in the air i have i have Danny do you have Brandon or still big cat i have it's not saved of the host of PMT. PMT host. Yeah. I had Bill Burr once, but I think he changed it. Oh, that's a big one. Did you delete it from your phone book or do you still like having it in there? I kept it in there. Bill Burr. Yeah, of course. You got to keep that. Yeah. We booked him for the Portnoy show one time. He's like, just text me. I was like, okay. Gladly. Yeah. Will Compton once put me in a group chat with like some NFL players so we could all play Risk on our phones, but I don't know who any of them are. You just know they're NFL players. Yeah. How do you play on your phone? The Risk app. There's an app. Yeah. Come on, Titus. The Risk app. Okay. NFL players play Risk? Yeah, I believe so. So what does the chat look like? You just say, like, anybody looking to play right now? We've only played once. I was sitting next to Will. Did that chat take hold at all or was it a one-off? It was a one-off. We sent the link to our usernames. Compton put me in a group chat with Jeff D. Lowe and Rico Bosco one time so we could talk about the show Suits. Oh, that's a good group chat. That's a good group chat. I think we talked about. Were you just talking about random episodes that you guys were on? No, I think it was. Was it in COVID when Suits had the resurgence? Everybody started watching Suits on Netflix at the same time? I think so. And I think we all kind of went through it together. I was on season two at the time, and I didn't even make it past season four. But we had a Suits group chat. I don't have a lot of group chats that I participate in. Has anyone ever gone? Like, I have never gone through and cleared out old numbers. Oh, I don't either. I'm looking at it, and I'm like, oh, from my single days. Oh, wait a second. Just names like Ballsack, Band-Aid. or is that one man one dude Bundy Beard Bar who the hell is that I don't know please call out all these names Cuddy's B-Day Bar do you remember who Ballsack was I couldn't tell you who that from is Band-Aid somebody that you saw and had a Band-Aid on so you named them that Bowtie Guy you don't seem like a Bowtie Guy gal no yeah i guess i haven't cleared this out in a long time there's numbers in here from like 20 years ago how did ball sack bocce dude claude i didn't know a frenchman combo lock guy i don't know what any of this means that's a good question but all of these names you can kind of put together a story at least i can right he's right ball sack how do you arrive at like deciding to put the guy down as ball sack you see a band-aid on a guy's arm he's band-aid band-aid yeah you didn't see the guy's ball sack did you you get no no way of knowing i don't know i would say marines have weird nicknames so i wouldn't be shocked if that's like an old nickname of something yeah there's some weird ones in here okay what do you think the weirdest name somebody has of you in their phone i think they call you like i'll allow you to finish it clitoris band-aid is probably Jeezy. Who's that? Okay. Is that Jeezy? Jeezy. Nobody famous. The famous person Jeezy? Famous rapper Jeezy? Chris Musician, but it's K-H-R-I-S? Oh, God. From Criss Cross? Could be. Did he jump? Muff? Muff? Who the hell is Muff? I did have a phase. Yeah? A phase? No, no. Can't do it. I support it, but it's just not for me. What about it? I don't want to look at my own. They are tough. Somebody else's. Okay. Well, this has been interesting. Back to you guys. Ed, did you see we had White Sox Dave describe his perfect pussy? Oh, gross. Yeah. Just a clean slit, no flappage is what he wants. I like a good clam. Where were you asking him this? I was doing the most. We had him draw his ideal woman. And he talks about the Cranston. I didn't know about the Cranston. What's the Cranston? The gap between pussy and thigh. He likes a girl that has a... I don't know. It was disgusting. That has a what? I don't know. Like a pronounced one? What was the Cranston? I forget what the Cranston was. It's right below the clam. You don't know about the fucking Cranston. It's my favorite part of a woman. Now, to be fair to Dave, that's not an uncommon opinion. What? Oh. Big Cranston guy? No, not the Cranston. Just the ax slit. The clean slit. Yeah, the ax. Okay. What else did he say about it? You guys in Chicago, the Chicago guys talk about pussies a lot? No, you talked about pussies before. You did it with a sound effect like you've done it before. I like my... Tommy smokes. It was the, he calls it the axe wound. Ew. Ew. Ew. Yeah, disgusting. Chicago guys in general aren't known for their normal looking wieners. That's a good point. That's a good point. Chicago guys have weird dicks? Chicago guys have weird dicks. I'm just saying. Where's that coming from? I don't know, Eddie, you and your weird dick having friends. Just looking around. I'm not like, these guys all have great dicks. Not around the office. I don't think about you guys like that. But just if I was out in the street. You just thought about it. We don't have. No. You guys are all Ken dolls to me. You look at 10 guys out in Chicago, you're like, seven of these are weird. Midwest boys that eat beef all day. That means probably a pretty hefty piece, right? No. What does it have to do with the cock? Lumpy. I'm just saying, weird hair. I just don't picture you guys as like. Eddie, do you or do you not have a weird cock? I'm probably weird. I'm not talking about coworkers. I don't think about... Everybody's smooth to me. That's fucked up, Kate. Yeah. No, just let her try to get herself out of this. It's just not... Who are you guys? Who are we? Who are you guys? Yeah, to expect a perfect slit. Do you think you deserve a perfect slit? Exactly. I think you deserve such a... No, no, no. There's not a... Like, there's, you know... There's no, what's the word I'm looking for? I'm going to let you go. I'm looking for the right word. There's no discrimination towards them. No. But, you know, some are Jon Hamm, some are, you know, Jack Osborne. Like, that's just it. Oh, wait, you said Jon Hamm for the good-looking one. Yeah, exactly. That's a bad... You know what I mean. I do, but it was just a little bit misleading. I thought it was... Yeah, I didn't want to name specific women because then that insinuates I know what their vaginas are. But Jon Hamm obviously being a handsome guy, Jack Osborne being the opposite of a handsome guy. Do you want your pussy handsome? You want a handsome pussy? I want a handsome pussy you have. My, my, my. This is stupid. I like my pussy with a strong jaw and a butt chin. A ruggedly handsome pussy. Undeniable charisma. jumps off the screen at you. I really just back myself. The real presence is awesome. I was out of smoke a cigar. Kate, if you were dating Ballsack for three months and he cheated on you and then went on to win the bronze medal in the biathlon skiing and got on television and started crying and said, I lost the love of my life, how would you react? That story's crazy. All I know is I want to be in the group chat with her and her friends. Yeah. That group chat has to be going crazy right now. Six months ago, I met the love of my life, the world's most beautiful, sweetest person. And three months ago, I made the biggest mistake of my life and cheated on her. Sterla Holm, like ride Norwegian by athlete. This was his interview after he got the bronze medal. And he also went on to be like, and so I'm committing social suicide to show her how much I love her. Was his whole thing. Maybe Norwegians like that. I don't know. She has a quote in People anonymously saying, yeah, I didn't want him to do that. I would die. Or something like that. That's the least. That's crazy. That's like Red Flag City. Especially six months. Six months is not long to have the love of your life. Especially if you cheated on him in three. Three months in, he was cheating. She must have had that Jon Hamm. That's good? That's good. Jon Hamm's a good pussy. Yeah, she had the Jack Osborne. If somebody hooked up with a chicken that was like, she had a real John hand, I would be like, oh, you're so lucky. Oh, that probably felt so good. John hand. What a bad example. A huge cock. She's on the boys along for the hand. I couldn't use a woman describing, I don't know. It's flustered. I'm all over the place. John Hamm. In fairness to Eddie, we all got it. No. I mean, John Hamm being a good-looking guy. Yes. Good-looking pussy. Hamm was like an interesting choice. Well, Hamm's a bad. You don't want a hammy pussy. In Pittsburgh, if you have a chipped ham, let's see. Pittsburgh. That's in Pittsburgh, they'd be like, she's got a chipped ham. That's mean. But in Chicago, see, that's a good thing. I think that's a big compliment in Pittsburgh. You're right. Maybe it is. I don't know. come on ed yeah i think i kind of like it now john ham yeah you think it'll catch on maybe if you led with jack osborne if you led with jack osborne and then when john was that your first example of an ugly guy um yeah he was my first that's been irrelevant in years there's a lot of ugly guys in the world you went straight to jack osborne he said brandon he lost he looks okay all right yeah what's jack osborne yeah maybe that was a mean. But my point is, even a Jack Osborne is still like, hey, I like you too. You're still fucking Jack Osborne. Yes, that's my point. There's no discrimination. He looks fine. Yeah, but as a pussy, he looked terrible. I agree with him. You don't want your pussy looking like that man. He'd be a bad looking pussy. Of all the ugly people to fish. That's such a... God damn, buddy. You were picturing a pudgy teen boy. Yeah, I was thinking of the Osborne show. You're that fat teenager. Jack Osborne. Yeah, shit. Have you seen Kelly Osborne? Yeah, her hands are big. What? No, I saw it yesterday. Complete transformation. Well, she's lost maybe. Look at this. I don't want to judge. She's maybe gone a little too far in the weight loss. Wait, go one over. Completely different person. Completely. She's a twig. That's, yeah. Which, good for you. Whatever you want to do, girl. Body positive. Jack's probably going to hear this and get some features done. In case she's jacking today. she's like lives on a farm now she's always posting with farm animals what is going on here doing well yeah i mean what do you think she's got yeah you think she's got her brother i'm leaning ham after seeing that got a pussy like her brother oh my god girl you got a ham i can see that ham that ham dude eddie that's so funny i don't know all right i'm gonna name a oh i need i need you to have more celebrity references for vagina like a stamos stamos is all in for well you guys know i mean sometimes you're with the girl and she's got the jack osborne i mean i love her to have a john ham we've all been there mickey smoke no steve pescemi um i would say that that's like a like a one with that i can't do this no yeah you can i wasn't asking i was giving you an example of like an ugly guy an ugly guy yeah yeah but steve he's got great accolades too you know yeah but i think it's telling that your number one example of an ugly guys jack osborne you've been holding that in for a long time i you fucking hate you were watching osborne you were like this man is hit this boy is hit i know what i did but i i don't want to say it because i feel bad what does that mean because i i think i think i was thinking of kelly back in the day oh dear but you said you didn't want to use a woman i know that's why i didn't use that's why i did it to jack yeah i don't want to be mean jack was definitely uglier than his sister back in the day. She was dating Burt McCracken. Who's Burt McCracken? He sounds like somebody in her phone. Burt McCracken wishes. I got that Burt McCracken, unfortunately. It's been used. Burt McCracken. Just kidding. Yeah. Jon Hamm. Jon Hamm. Texting your boys. Yeah, man. you didn't even have to compare it to like living things like a flower or yeah i guess i could have done that you know what you be you i know no i'm happy we needed it yeah this is whose line is it anyways yeah do you like that show i actually never got into it but i there was a kid i went to school with he went on the wayne brady show once yeah which made me think like who's been the most random person to have their own show oh that's a great question right yeah like that like we're talking on like a big network magic johnson having a talk show one time was crazy uh i think it lasted like two weeks or something um yeah but he was like was he still mega famous yeah he was yeah it makes sense why they try that yeah wayne brady was pretty famous yeah and like everybody loved wayne brady i feel like that chapelle skit like sent him over the top yeah i love that i don't know what shows are out there i guess how many how many people have their daytime talk shows. But they don't do them as much anymore. Kelly Clarkson's still doing it. Kelly Clarkson's been going on for like a decade. Yeah, it does really well. I think attending though. A lot of the shows these days are like, not compilation, but what's the ensembles? Ensembles like The View. Yeah. Like you don't have, like Magic Johnson had his own show. In the 90s and 2000s they were doing it all the time. Everybody had their own show. Yeah. Jinx's brother. Oh yeah, he had a show. It was a random one. It wasn't a talk show though. Yeah and I feel like the descriptor here is like the name of the person The Montel Williams show Yes Jeff Probst He had a show He had his own talk show I did not know that The Jeff Probst show One season. That's not a good sign. 5.7 on IMDb. Good logo. All right, you go back to 2000 until now. Would you rather be Jeff Probst or Ryan Seacrest? Seacrest. Seacrest. Wait. um jeff probst because he um is obsessed with what he does yeah he fucking loves survivor did did he get canned no he's no oh who am i thinking of thinking of the bachelor dude yeah how old do you think jeff probst is he's about 63 i was gonna say 58 64 well seacrest is like crazy wealthy outside of the show right yes i mean i assume they both do well. Seacrest has done more stuff. Seacrest has to be fucking exhausted because he's on everything. He's also got the Wheel of Fortune money now. That's got to be incredible. Do like five shows and three hours. I think they said that they only work 20 days a year on Wheel of Fortune. The game show host is the job. They can knock him out. That's a dream job. Just put on a beautiful dress, get makeup every day and then go like this. Steve Harvey I think lives in Dubai. He flies in and he does a show and he flies back. We should do that with mostly sports. Just record like 20 shows one day. Hammer him out. Yeah. Like at the beginning of September and then come back October 1st. Do another. And just guess what's going to happen. I'm fine with that. I am fine with half-assing that show. Half-assing any show. We've done it for years. Yeah. Just keep it rolling. Let's just whatever. Who gives a shit? Be smarter about it. You know how old she is? Look it up. I mean let's say she started in like 84 and she was probably 25 then so that was 42 years ago almost 70? I mean, to stick with it that long, it's got to be 68. It's got to be a sweet gig. And she still looks incredible. Oh, yeah. Good for her. That's nice. Do you think she has, like, alphabet fatigue, or she's still into it? She's got to be so tired of the alphabet. She's got to be tired of the alphabet. Does she have a book? Yes, almost certainly. Probably has multiple. But she, about halfway through. Every page is one letter. It changed from her turning letters to just pressing a little button. What? It's a button now? It's been a button for years. Oh, damn. I always thought Vanna speaks. Vanna speaks because she normally is not speaking. That was in 87. I bet she has multiple since then. The Queen of the Wheel. What could her book be about? Oh, do you... Mark Blutman dated her for two years. What? What? You're lying. I swear. You're fucking lying. Mark, before he met Mrs. Blutman, Mark Blutman dated her for two years. Live with her, I believe. What was it? Not in West Hollywood, but it was one of those little towns. Yeah. Mark Blutman dated her for two years She was the hit girl Okay Mark Mark Blutman's connected to Hollywood I don't know what to tell you There was a chance Liam Blutman was going to be Vanna White's kid Didn't happen Wow Look at her She got married two weeks ago What? Wow I'd like to buy a Val Oh Oh! Oh! Oh! You have to, fucking. I was just about to say that. TJ, you have to like that. That's a good looking guy. And who is that? Who is that? Go to hers. What a line. Journalist. Two-time golden mic. On an IVF journey. That's good for her. All right. Let's learn about her journey. No, don't do that. Why would we buy a vow? Probably you. All right. Okay. That doesn't make sense, TJ. You lost the fucking plot. It's like from Wheel of Fortune. Vanna White got married? I'm happy. Nobody told me. Are you bummed out? Was she your fallback? No, but I got to text Mark Blutman. I'm sure he's sad. How do you fumble Vanna? I think she fumbled him. Oh, no. Oh. Yeah. Good for him. Two years is enough to get to know her and stuff. Oh, yeah. Yeah, he was all up in that ham. You think? That's for sure a Jon Hamm. Am I right or not? Thumbs up or thumbs down? Okay, so he's being coy. Oh, did he get a haircut? I think so. Look at those layers. I think he had a beard cut. Yeah, you're looking good, Blutman. Looks good. Are you uncomfortable with us talking about this? Dad giving Vanna an O. He didn't even have to pay. Got that vowel for free. that would be the first thing i tell people even if i was dating somebody differently and they were with me oh you're dating somebody new you're like yeah by the way the one before you was vanna white oh yeah if i was buttman that's the first thing i'd tell the girl my dad dated vanna white for two years in the 80s i think it was like a year and a half i stretched out a little bit two years I don't think it was that, but it was about a year and a half. That's like a top name. Just like the mystique alone. What is she like? She's so iconic. I'm pretty sure it was pre-Wheel of Fortune. I don't think she was famous yet. Still. She was on the way, and she was obviously already beautiful. Do you think it ruined the show for him forever? I don't know. You can't watch that again. Yeah. she was universally lusted after yeah I had a friend he was he was in a a commercial for a Blackhawks like season tickets thing he was like a diehard Blackhawks fan he was with his ex-girlfriend and so every time he would watch the Hawks he would have to see him and her on the TV and he's like it just fucking ruins it for me yeah can't watch never be in a commercial with your girl never I'm surprised there aren't more Vannas Yeah, was it a popular name when she blew up? Yeah, you're right At this point, we'd see a lot of Vannas I've never met one Adult women named Vanna I've never seen a Vanna Was her name short for Savannah or something like that? Or was she just Savannah? I don't know Could you shorten Vanessa? Perhaps If it's anything, it's Savannah right is that ours is that one of that is that a name we use yeah chris chrisley so right chris has a savannah oh maybe not i've seen some savannahs i've never seen a vana there's i mean one in the news right now a vana or savannah savannah oh yeah oh guthrie oh my god i know yeah i haven't been keeping up with that very sad they have video of the guy at the door now with a mask on. That is fun. Oh, really? Crazy. It puts like a plant over the ring doorbell cam. Yeah. Creepy. And they just arrested a DoorDash driver. I know. Who it was not. That's crazy. Arrested him or questioned him? They arrested him. They took him in for a few hours for questioning. But it turns out, I think his car, they kept seeing his car in the area on ring cam, so it turns out it's because he's a delivery driver. Yeah. Nothing suspicious. Are there any, like, theories of something suspicious. Not that I've seen. It's like a real pickle. Let's find Vanna White's real name. Yeah, let's get off that. Yeah. I think she's just a Vanna. Just Vanna? I think her parents came up with Vanna and were like, we're going to name this person something unique. And they went with it. Vanna Marie White. Yeah, it's just Vanna. Stem is from Giovanna. Oh, Giovanna. Miss Georgia. I didn't know she was in Georgia. Where's that motherfucker from? She's a southern gal. North Myrtle Beach. North Myrtle Beach she was born. Oh, she got out of there. Oh. Good for her. She moved to Atlanta after graduating high school. Okay. But wait. White sermon. She wasn't born white. So roasted. But she was born white. A little pink. Born, yeah. Michael Jackson. All right. School of fashion and design. Second husband. Her first husband died? No. John Gibson? Oh, first partner. Partner. I guess she does have a lot to write about. Oh, handsome. The Warriors. Chippendales. Chippendales dancer Alright let's do the inverse Kate If you see a dude and you're like I bet he's got a very normal looking penis Do you call that like a Heidi Klum? And if he's got a bad looking penis What do you call that? Yeah what's like an ugly woman? It's an ugly woman's penis Like a Susan Boyle Oh no Susan Boyle We should do it around the office Name an ugly woman Oh, fuck. She looks great now. Does she? No. You're trying to fix the clip. I'll tell you this much. Pat's got that Giselle bunching. Does he? He's got that Giselle dick. Yeah, it didn't sound as good. Anyway, good for her. reading that switch over right after Giselle Dick and TJ pull up Boyle Boyle now or Boyle then Boyle now I think is better than then but very talented of course very talented which is all that really matters at the end she looks too good now I know this is like the Kelly Osbourne situation Boyle looks fine she's looking good well no that's not That's pretty recent. You could date that. What picture did you just show me? I don't know. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear Timothy. Happy birthday to you. She's still got it. Still got it. Have a wonderful day. You think Dana's heard that song before? The Daytona 500. It is not just the start of NASCAR season. It's the moment when everything comes alive again and sets the tone for the entire year. It's iconic speed, pure spectacle, and adrenaline-filled moments wrapped into one larger-than-life American tradition. The Great American Race is prestigious without feeling stuffy and unpredictable in a way that keeps your heart in your throat for 500 miles. For drivers, it's the race that defines careers and etches their names into the history books forever. Full throttle, three-wide, door-to-door racing action for the win. Clear your schedule, grab a drink, and tune in to the Daytona 500 Sunday, February 15th. That is this Sunday, I believe, if I'm understanding calendars correctly. At 2.30 p.m. Eastern on Fox, the Daytona 500. It is awesome. I've been in one Daytona 500 at the time of my life. I've heard. Can't recommend it enough. It is a great, it is called the Great American Race, and I stand by that. It's a lot of fun. I said this race is American. It is a race. And I'll be damned it is great. It is. It's a fun time. Longest ever jet ski ride in the pond in the middle of Daytona. I'll be goddamn. Wow. World record. Has anybody seen any great stand-up specials this week? I have not. I haven't watched any yet. Have you, Brandon? I was just wondering. I'd be supportive if any new ones were out. I agree. I would, too. Yeah. I agree. He texted me the other day. Good. I'm talking about Smitty. He seems well. He seems well. He seemed very well. He texted me, and I was like, yeah, what's up? and we texted back and forth. He seems like he's in good spirits and things are in good shape for him. I think that's great to hear. Pretty much everybody here would be very glad to hear that. He's the man. Yeah, agreed. Agreed. I had texted him last January and he texted me as a direct reply to it Saturday and just said thanks for that and everything. And then he got on my ass about my dozen championship. He said that was basically a Hakeem Olajuwon title while Michael Jordan was gone off and doing that stuff. But, yeah, he seemed like he's in good shape. Che had texted him, like, two years ago asking if he could go on the rundown, and then Smitty texted Che the other day with a joke, being like, sorry, I can't make it. Can you ask someone else? Yeah. And then I was like, Che, he was obviously kidding. He's like, oh, I thought he just had the wrong numbers. It was a jarring day. You said, I said, like, are you available to do the rundown in 30 minutes from December 2024? for. I think Saturday he reached out to, I think Saturday he took some time and reached out to everybody who had reached out to him, or a lot of people that reached out to him, probably not everybody, but yeah. So it was good to hear from him. This is a weird thing to say, but he's got a very specific voice that to me was very Barstool, and it's nice to hear it again. Yeah, definitely. I didn't watch it because we were on mostly when it came out, but it was like seven minutes of stand-up? Ten minutes? 17. 17, excuse me. Seven plus ten being 17. I was somehow right, even though I was wrong. Good for him. That's how he got his start, was doing small open mics and stuff. Does it feel like it'd be funny? I think it's hilarious. Yeah. I would think so. He's got a dry... Yeah. He's a funny guy. Does he look funny? He looks great. Does he look like a guy? Actually, you know what? He might be. When he comes on stage, does he look funny? He might be one of the guys that looks funny. He does look like he's funny. Yeah. Definitely. Yeah. And I think the title of his stand-up special, he's good humor about it. I think it was Choose Love. Was it? I believe so. I hope I'm right. But I think so. Yeah. So he's having fun with it. He's mixing up. TJ, I need to see something because I'm getting DMs. Did Hogdale go after me after the act started? For what? Well, I was on the WUB this morning, which feels like it was two weeks ago. I was on WUB and we were talking about the Patriots and I simply said my feelings about the Patriots next year. They're not going to be any good. And I think he answered me and he's pissed off. Oh, 241. Patriots going back to five or six wins next year. Will the schedule just be too much to overcome for the New England Patriots going in the next year? Fuck no. No, this is a dumb. This is an absurd take. It's one of the worst takes I've ever heard in my entire life. I got nothing against Brandon Walker, man. Brandon Walker's cool. I got to meet him in person for the first time not too long ago when I went down to San Francisco. seems like a very pleasant guy in any interaction that I've had with him. Just a horrible take, though. I mean, I understand you kick the losing team when they're down. When the team loses, it's good to just, you know, like, hey, fuck those guys. Let's slander them up and down every which way. I'm sorry, there's a 0% chance the Patriots win less than nine games next year. Less than nine? Just based on the division we play in. Have you seen their schedule? It's going to be nasty. They have to play. Well, they won the division, so now you have to play a bunch of – It does, but it ain't going to be what it was this year. Sure, but this year the Bears technically had the second hardest schedule, and it was not. It just didn't. Sure, but they had a once-in-a-lifetime easy schedule this year. The Patriots did. For sure, yeah. Even if he came in guns blazing, which he didn't, could you be mad at him? I don't think so. No. I wasn't prepared to have a war with him. No. um that just wouldn't so so but he also now that i see it he didn't come after me he just came after what i said so zero percent chance not you just what i said yeah well there's there's there's zero percent chance less than less than nine you should make a bet with them jaguar hair jaguar hair if they don't win nine how let's think of a different uh animal like bengal hair what about another what about patriot patriot patriot hair red white oh yeah flag hair this is their schedule at the bills at the bears at the lions at the chiefs at the chargers dolphins bills dolphins jets broncos raiders packers vikings jets jags my dumb ass thought that was the actual schedule up until like the fourth game i was like they open on the road i mean at seahawks at jags at chargers at chiefs at lions that's nasty it's hard that's nasty oof speaking of angry Patriots fans have you seen Fasoli okay so that was I was gonna bring that up too I saw Viva tweeted out uh what I didn't see it so actual mad Fasoli which was weird to see but he he was like Kevin KFC and Fasoli I love Fasoli but he was like you don't know what it's like like I had to sit in the 300 levels growing up Fasoli Fasoli's thing was he was crying the other day not because not because they were going to win or lose but because he grew up he only got to go to preseason games his dad worked really hard to take him to games and everything and kevin tweeted out yesterday like oh i didn't know that also still fuck you something like that okay uh and i guess they finally crossed paths this morning like the fuck you was probably in in good fun right it was probably a good fucking jets for the lord oh i'll read it for the podcast this was in response to kevin being like fuck fasoli for having uh for crying at the Super Bowl. I am so truly sorry that you had to endure being a Jess fan your entire life KFC, but my tears were not just from the Patriots being in the Super Bowl. I didn't grow up with money or going to Patriot regular season games every week. I grew up with three other siblings and a father who was a construction worker who broke his back to bring us to a preseason game every summer or two. Stop laughing. It was truly such a beautiful moment and a moment I'll never forget in my life because of Dave Portnoy seeing a football game from that perspective. Instead of squishing around the TV watching my favorite team at my family's house during Sunday dinner like how I grew up doing. I truly hope in your lifetime you can feel the same from your pathetic franchise that has let you down for so long. Now we need to see Kevin's answer, the tweet answer to that. You would have thought he grew up in Compton. Or that he grew up... Where did he grow up? Lobster trap mess. I didn't realize the whole backstory about your family, your siblings, and your dad's job and everything. In that case, I still don't give a fuck and I hate you and hope you all get your heart broken every year. Which again, I think is fair play. That's pretty funny. And so that's the Twitter backstory from yesterday. They apparently saw each other for the first time on Roan.com this morning. Oh, no. This is awesome. I just want to hear about your wholly unique experience where you and your father and your brothers like football. I've got one brother, two sisters. Sorry. You and your family like football. Like no one else does. Yeah, no shit. But it was an unbelievable experience. You think I'd ever make it to a suite and sit next to NFL owners, you dickhead? Wait, was it more of the Patriots or like the Barstool effect? Everything. All of it. I was going to preseason games in the middle of fucking August. In the fucking 300s, Kevin. You think I'd ever be in the fucking suites on I-07 next to fucking the Raiders? So, if we're crying at late. Wait, what is that? This is Boston Axe kicking me. Taking everything in. We were three hours before the game. I know, but that's what I mean. He wasn't a patriot on the field. That's what I'm saying. That's why it's crazy. I grew up playing football. That's the biggest stage. That's my favorite sport. That's my favorite sport. I know, but you're acting like you. It's unique to you. It's like everybody did it. You're the only one out there. I love football. That's the biggest fucking stage you're seeing anything on. Yeah, I'm just saying, like, if it was like Foxborough and you're around Patriots fans and all that, but you're like. I was around all Patriots fans. Yeah, I guess with like half the stadiums against you, you're on a neutral site. They're not even playing yet. Neutral site has nothing to do with it. It's the Super Bowl in California. You're crying about Dave. No, I was crying about everything. I was looking out over the stadium, seeing my team's logo in the end zone, seeing it on the sideline. But also, like, the first hundred Super Bowls, were you crying at all those or was it because you were there? It's because I was there in person. Yeah. I've never been to a big game like that. Get it. Get it. I understand. Listen, I'm not saying that it's rare for somebody to cry like this. I'm saying that every time there is somebody that I just fucking hate, and this time it's you. Because you are also a newer character. Like, it's always Dave, Gaz, Hank. I said that. Yeah. I said that. And so it was like, oh, add it to the list. This is one more guy to fucking wish the worst upon him, and I hope you never get back. That's good. It's the preseason games. It's the middle of August. No, the Raiders is great. The Raiders. I'm in a suite. I'll sit next to the Raiders. Wait. I don't get that part. I don't know either. Mark Davis was in the suite next to them. Oh, I thought he was like. He forgot his name. about someone's name he's talking about the team the Raiders yes yes that makes it more surreal the whole Las Vegas roster was in the top there wasn't even a Patriot on the field yet of course I was crying that's good I still don't quite get the argument I don't know whose side I'm on I just love that it's I the one side being laughing and pointing and joking at the Patriots losing and and the other Fasoli being that angry and that mad. Kevin never got mad. Right. I got to go team Kevin on this. That was just good. Imagine if you had a time machine, you could go back and tell boy Fasoli squished in front of his TV that he'd be sitting next to Doradas on aisle seven. Who says aisle seven? Aisle seven. To Doradas. To Doradas. Doradas. Who would have thought? I love that boy so much. but august preseason his dad broke his back dad are you okay like we can leave dad we don't need to get the 300 also it wasn't like we never got to go to anything we never got to go to a game we just went to preseason games yeah right i could see you being overly happy about getting to go to the super bowl but leading with like i've only ever been to a preseason game in august but that was hogdale's first game ever yes he'd never been to a patriots game maybe never an nfl game but what did his dad do okay right i mean it's it's nice facility's appreciative oh yeah yeah i'd like that there are way too many people that are like i deserve this and whatever so that's nice but kfc's fan yeah but i was to kfc's point i don't think he had a unique experience as hard as he tried to make it seem like yeah no one has had the life that i had like he got it out of the And I think Kevin might be right that the tears were, a lot of it was probably Patriots and Dan and everything, but he was also on a suite with Portnoy. And you know. And the Raiders. And the Raiders. But I think if he would have said that, like, you know, I never thought I'd be here. I think it would be more. That'd make more sense. Yeah. Yeah. Marty pointed out that like a couple years ago, Fasoli was tweeting, I can't believe I'm sleeping on Marty Much's couch and I get to film a video with him. Like that's, Fasoli's just like the number one, like appreciating his surroundings guy. And he loves the Patriots and Barstool. And this was, you know, both of them. Kind of reminds me of Duke's crying when Dayton won the first round. Knuckle deep in his skull. Yeah. I took that video. That was great work. I was like, I knew I was witnessing history. You know, it's one of those rare times. This is just. And that motherfucker was crying. It's cool that it means this much to you, but also we have to clown you. That's what it is. I understand completely. It was super sentimental for him. What an experience. But you're getting clowned. Yeah, yeah. That's how it works. And it's not malicious clown. It just would have been anybody. Can I see the Dukes video? The Fasoli tweet was like, if you would have told me three years ago, I'd be sitting in Marty Mush's apartment waiting for him to get ready to go film at a dumpster a dude named Jersey Jerry used to sleep next to, I would have told you I don't believe you. Or something along the lines of that. Hey, Mark, when you started at Barstool, when you got the job, did you anticipate more great Dugues moments along the way? Because when you started, it was right when he did. Yeah. Who should have been? Wait. Who should the MVP should have been? Like, the first couple of weeks, we had a lot of great Dugues, and then all of a sudden he's just gone. Well, Dayton basketball was good, too, when I started. They're not very good anymore. So there was that, too, that he was just so emotional about that. I mean, this is the best. Ed, I didn't know this was you. Yeah, it was me and him for some reason. You were in Dayton? We were in Dayton. That's at a bar in Dayton. They just won a first-round game against somebody like? Nevada. Nevada, okay. Yes. 10 versus 7. But was every dude in there crying? Right, because my reaction is kind of what KFC was saying. It's like, everyone in that bar is very happy that Dayton won, and they have similar stories. I said, Dukes. That's just sobbing. I was sobbing. Dukes was supposed to be there to film you, right, Eddie? No, no, no. It was one of those high noon parties, and I volunteered to go to one, and then I drew Dayton and Dukes. I was like, all right, nice. Never thought I'd see this, but here we go. And then we're at Dayton, and it was, to be fair to Dukes, it was a great game. They were down like 15. It was. Yeah, like they were dead in the water. But his argument, I guess, or his feeling was because he was at school when they were the one scene that got canceled. Right. And his dad went there, so there's like a deep history. All that's fair, but I think you look at the rest of the people in the bar and they have probably the exact same story, and they're just kind of like, you all right, buddy? He cried over there. You were very close on this one. Titus, have you seen this one? If you told me six months ago that I'd be sitting on Marty Mush's couch at 6 a.m. waiting for him to get up so we could film a guy named Jersey Jerry as he trains the fight in rough and rowdy, I would have paused stool scenes on my couch and said if what did Owen say what did Owen say if only if only oh man I miss Dukes where is he now financial he's doing something completely opposite he's producing podcasts Oh, that's right. That's right. We'd never guess. That's right. He's like, I really can't say. Do we remember? I'm trying to leave my old life behind me. This is something completely new. I'm doing. I think he said, I'm doing a complete 360. Kind of. God, yeah. He's good. I think he put it through a tweet out there being like, hey, if you need people in the suite. Did he throw a feeler out there? I think he might have. I mentioned it to Dave at the flag football dish to see what would happen. He laughed. He wasn't a Patriots fan. Yeah. Remember that episode he came on and it was just hit after hit. His leg was broken. And you're like, how's your leg? And he's like, oh, which one? You're like, how's your family? He was a good character. We found out Obi Toppin. Fucked his girl. Kept calling my ex-girlfriend while we were dating. Yeah. yeah he was one of those i thought would be a be a lifer we would just get duke stuff every two honestly and now he just has a complete you're right brain like the second i got hired i got a lot of dukes in my life yeah and i was like i guess this is just gonna be a steady thing for me uh-huh and uh didn't know what we had i know man now i get donnie instead which by the way his hatred for you is my favorite thing at the company i was uh i watched the clip back of you going over there and writing gay and then when he when he wheels that thing around he does it with some malice he he might throw a punch in that moment i think i have to go to china right you have to not tell him yeah even if he like pop up if you have to miss a year your daughter life so you can get your chi on par with Donnie you going to have to go to China right You have to go to China I have to not tell him Yeah Even if he Just like pop up If you have to miss a year of your daughter life so you can get your chi on par with Donnie you going to have to do it I think I have to do it I think the root of him getting flustered is this is the first time he's not really good at something immediately. Like talking live in a mic and it's getting him all flustered and he doesn't know what to do. Over correcting. But Jack shouldn't be allowed to talk to him. No. They can't be friends anymore. Yeah. Donnie went to the high school that's the bad guys in Mighty Ducks. He played hockey for the bad school. A Dino. A Dino. Yeah. Huh. The video that Rudy put out of Donnie and Rudy playing Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader is fucking hilarious. That's a real crew right there. That's an impossible task. Reading comprehension on that crew together. That was a great video. It's an hour super cut of just hits. It's the hour highlights. I remember vividly reading that book. Yeah. That was a fun one. Yeah, it was a good book. That and Bob Mice and Man I liked and Rapes of Grass. Rudy. All right, Rudy, here's fourth grade. Here's fourth grade. After that, here's fourth grade. Buckle up. All right, Rudy. All right, it's time to lock in. We need your full attention, Rudy. Here comes fourth grade. really good it's an hour of just that in that video the rapes of grath Rudy's videos have been doing really well yeah they're funny everyone should go subscribe and watch him is Rudy dumb like that does he have moments similar to Donnie he doesn't get flustered like Donnie okay so whenever he says something dumb I think he kind of turtles up yeah okay But he does it too. Because Rudy's got his shit together. But he can't read. Okay. At all. Not even a little bit? No. Not a word. Not a lick. Oh, that was on display during the things stream, right? He couldn't spell. Yeah. Yeah. Wedge. Did the, I know you told us about it, but did the George Floyd grill make that video? It did make the video. It did make the video. I let Donnie tattoo my leg. Oh, yeah. I saw that one. During that part. Can I tell you guys about Roback? Yes. Roback active wear. Best fit, best feel. You all know Roback. We wear it all the time. They got the best hoodies and joggers in the game. 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Head over to Roback.com, R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com. use code yak for 20 off your first purchase at roback.com all right good read thank you very much we got a couple new advertisers today oh yeah love for us that's why we command that's why we all sit first class kate hell yeah that was did you pay to upgrade or did you just get that ticket no i paid okay i paid oh i just yeah i pay plus i was taking my wife too and i didn't want her to sit in 38 g that's where i was yeah no you weren't i i upgraded to exit row for 60 bucks yeah brent whatever happened with vacation plans you had with the boys and i feel like you had a few uh texas you had a few lines out there that you i got a lot of lines out there tommy is still austin texas uh the um the middle boy the middle boy said nothing and the youngest boy wants to go to Seattle because he liked the Seahawks the other day. Oh. That was the first Super Bowl. The youngest one has watched with me the other day. It was amazing. But now he's all about the Seahawks and Seattle. We were rooting pretty hard for the Seattle in my house. Interesting. Are your kids into nature and land forms? So youngest boy is into sports, basketball, baseball, golf, above all else. the middle boy is into space and telescopes and cooking and stuff like that. And Tommy is my he wants to go hiking and he wants to go see mountains which is odd why he's the one who wants to go to Austin, Texas. Best of all worlds. Where's that in southern West Virginia with the giant telescope? Y'all got a big telescope? Pocahontas County. Is it? Greenbelt. Seattle might be a good movie. You got all three with that. So I got three different boys and three different wants. And then if you have my girl, she wants to go to everything else. She wants to go to... Everywhere but Seattle. What about, what is it, Cape Canaveral? Oh, down in Florida. Is that a touristy destination? Can you go there as a tourist? Yeah. There's some good beaches nearby. A cruise hub. I can see Tommy going in the Everglades and hunting those snakes that they're trying to kill and stuff. Yeah, I can see him doing like a snake hunting simulator on his computer. I don't know if I can get him out there. Snake hunting simulator. Yeah. Zah, you ever done a snake hunting simulator? Nah, but that sounds pretty awesome. Yeah. I'd love to. Yeah. Za, have you seen the Roma is selling game-used jerseys and shorts of their women team? Oh, really? And did you see how much more the shorts are than the tops? And then there's one that's way more expensive, too. Oh, wait. Isn't Alicia Layman? It is? Yeah, I'm buying that. And then the shorts are like triple the price. Have you all seen Alicia Lehman before? Wait, who's the one that's expensive here? I'm guessing Alicia Lehman. Aliyah Pilgrim? Aliyah Pilgrim? Giada Grey, he is too. Barcelona was selling grass like two years ago. Game worn women's shorts. I never understood that fetish of wanting to smell. The last thing I'd want to do. It's got to be the faintest remnant. It's not getting pure post. Is there a sommelier for that? We're going to get Ian Cobble. Who's the Ian Cobble of... Of all the interactions with somebody, smelling's the worst. Is that your least favorite? Smelling somebody. If somebody smells good, though, I like me. Oh, yeah. It goes the other way, too. If someone smells good, they could be Jack Osborne. If they smell good, I'm... There's this new... Even someone as hideous as Jack... There's this new deaf and blind baby on the market. He loves the wind. I've been seeing his videos. On the market how? I've been seeing him on like the... He's hit the scene. What do you mean on the market? Yeah, I guess that's the wrong word. On social media. Of course he likes it. He fucking loves the wind. It is adorable. He is in heaven. Yeah, I'm glad he's happy. Roan. What did Roan say? That's a good thing. That's beautiful. It's truly touching. It is. But it's amazing how much he loves just being outside. I love that. Hell yeah. Is it because of smells? I think the feel. I gotta say, yeah, a breeze. The feel of a breeze. He has to buy a whole sensory wonderland. Poor baby boy. Sitting outside in the breeze is fucking awesome. It's nice. What? Duh? Duh, you okay? I'm all good. I'm all good. Sorry, cramp. I said sitting outside in the breeze is awesome, and you made this. Now there's sad breaking news. Oh, no. No. No. Oh, fuck. Fuck. You're sick. god damn it he had like six kids damn awful motherfucker well uh all right we asked for it yeah that sucks you think of him is it dawson or varsity blues dawson dawson dawson first for sure i think varsity blues now yeah he had a really great sense of humor he was very funny too we're back in angus we ever seen angus what's angus that's the big kid big redhead kid yeah yeah it's a good movie i don't think i watched it but i was aware of maybe i watched it once yeah it was a good one what else was he in he definitely showed up in showed up in something sarcastically did he show up like jay and silent bob doing something i think you're right yeah i think you're right dawson's creek was one of those shows i had to sneak i wasn't allowed to watch it oh really yes i don't even know what it was about i was just about high school problems right high school kids but it had like adult themes yeah oh they'd be sneaking out at night it was him and joshua jackson was pacey my best friend alan brown watched it religiously i never uh watched it with him but he would tell me about it were we gay no anyway um who's the girl there was a few leading ladies that were hot from that show there we go there we go there we go yep and then who's the blonde it was um her name was michelle in the show i think this is why the The other day when that winning question for you came out and it was like party of five. I was like, he's got that one. That was a little early for me. You got your late 90s show. What was your original dozen team? Me, Clem, and Rico Bosco. Were you guys good? Were you winning a lot? We were not bad, but we never won. I'll tell you this. Dawson's Creek walked so Outer Banks could run. I've never seen Outer Banks. They were the original because they lived in the swamplands of the ladies will get it. I've never seen Outer Banks. Oh, that's a good one, too. That's a big one, yeah. I never saw Outer Banks either. I at least dropped in on Dawson's Creek a couple times. Good theme song? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Paula Cole. I don't want to wait. Yeah. And she blocked them from redoing it, so now when people watch it, it's not in the show. What? Fuckers. What the fuck's her problem? I don't know. Scrubs has changed all their songs on streaming now. Did they? Yeah. Oh. I think they might have, since they're rebooting or redoing. They're getting them back? They might have gotten them back, yeah. Okay. Because the music in Scrubs was the best. They were great at it. What? What? I may have been able to watch the first couple episodes. Do you have a screener? You want to? Yeah. Does it have a big watermark that says Brandon over it? Uh-huh. Does it actually? Uh-huh. Send it to me. I'll tweet it out. All right. All right. Did you say who I was interviewing the other day? Mm-mm. Okay. Keep it a secret. But I guess they can guess. No one will know. unrelated what a magical day that was unrelated to my access to the two scrubs was it pretty solid? it was great yeah a lot of fan service though? oh yeah I fanboyed all over them oh the show yeah yeah no legitimate storytelling uh oh TV went out Nick did you watch the screener I sent you? several months ago for that comedian Chris Crofton? No, I did not. Okay, I've just been harboring that deep down for several months now. Yeah, I forgot you said it. You should watch it. I'm going to apologize to Nick for bringing that up. No, no, no. No, no, it's okay. I've just been waiting. I would love to watch this. Don't you see how beige Cody is? Cody's always trying to control scheme. Like a piece of white bread. Cody! Should we have him on? He's just looking beige. He's always walking across. Where's he going? Probably over there. To make this interaction happen. Right. Because there's so many other waters. Wait until they see how beige I am today. They're going to come. He blends in. Does he like that? Beige from head to toe. His cheeks match the body armor. You're the fucking man, Cody. How's your dog, Cody? He ate a chicken wing the other day. It's going to drive him to his death. How is that the answer to that question? How's your dog? How's your dog, Cody? He ate a chicken wing the other day. So maybe great. Maybe bad. Or horrible. Best day of his life or worst. Yeah. Did you talk about the Kaminga story on Mostly? No. What's the Kaminga story? So he just got traded. He's a guy in the Warriors. Thank you. And one of the reports was that it was because one of his family members was taking too much food out of the room, like the family room. Oh, like catering at the Warriors? Yes. What a nightmare. there. Golden State reportedly alerted Kamehia that the person around him was taking too much food from the family room. Sources of the surrounding situation said the relationship between Kamehia and the organization had become petty and should have ended years before. How much food? It is fucking hilarious. What is a family room? I don't know. They have rooms for each of their families to watch the games. The NFL teams get graded on it. How good the family rooms and stuff are. Interesting. How much could you possibly be taking? That's what I'm saying. East African that checks out. Who said that, Brandon? Brandon. Brandon! Whose voice was that? Was that yours, Brandon? I was on camera while that voice was talking. My mouth wasn't moving. Oh, boy. Can we see a picture of Kaminga's family? Maybe gas. That's a petty thing to put out, though. You have to be bringing a tote bag with Ziplocs in it, really. Yeah, you've got to be taking it home and eating it later every night. I take a couple treats for my kids at the end of every day, but I'm not taking. Right? That's so funny. Blown away. Yeah, who abuses the food here the most? Oh, I mean, I have some answers, but. Che? Che does, but Che doesn't. Che, you take shit home? No. That is the update. What do you think, Saul? Is that what? That lady is taking everything. Anything that is left behind Jesus. You just could tell? Brother, I know the kind. That is a proper African mommy right there. She's taking it all, Zah. They don't waste. When it comes to food, they don't play. Unrelated, let's really make sure we get a full shot of Zah on the camera there. Let's make sure we really show that face. to answer your question it was tate he didn't grocery shop for his first oh yeah he lived off the office insane openly putting on weight nikki smokes will come here in the evening after he's gone home to get the free food and leave without walking into the office properly you're like walk in to the bar make a plate walk out yeah but i mean it's free food it's free food It's free food. A ton gets thrown away. Not going to shame people for free food. Free food is awesome. The only egregious move would be if you're making plates to take home, I think. Yeah. If we had, like, catering, you make your plate to eat here, and then you go back. Oh, didn't Dan get mad at you? Because he was. I don't know who would do that, Mark, what you just said. You do that? I don't know who to do that. That's crazy what you just said. Yeah, do that. Of course. So much gets. I actually, I didn't know you. I wasn't making a joke. I will wait until the end, at the end of the night, and you see what is available. And, Shay, this is how you do it, too, right? At the end of the night, you put away a leftover for the next day. I was watching closely. We had Cadoba cater, and there were some people really loading, really loading up. First in line. It smokes. Correct. I'll go up to people and say, is that your second plate? And they get so mad. They get really mad. I do that to Max every time. Well, one of the great controversies in my time at Barstool was at... Chick-fil-A. Chick-fil-A. Chick-fil-A. Oh, yeah. Some people were taking two-second sandwiches. Youngstown Bob at three. Who was it, though? Who was the one taking... Youngstown Bob. Oh, Youngstown Bob. But I guess somebody was sitting back either with a camera or just with a notepad just seeing who got one. And that's why you do what I do. You go get one. You deputize somebody else to go get your second one. And a third person to go get your third one. That's why I got my sister hired in the first place. just to grab your food just to grab my food what'd you get her for her birthday I don't know no I asked her yesterday how much money do you want me to send you for your birthday and she said instead of money can you just give me Instagram followers and I said yeah and I tagged her in something so please go follow my sister on Instagram run it up right now she's a fun lady I don't know she is a fun lady you don't want too many followers if you're her. What's her sweet spot, you think? I don't know. She woke up tomorrow and she had 150,000 followers. That's scary. If she could get to 30,000, it would be amazing. I don't know how many she's got now, though. Maybe she's over 30,000. She's 8? 25,000. I think 10 to 11. 11,000. Kate underscore Walker. Go on there and comment Brandon's fat on the first picture so we know you're a yacker. Why would you do that, though? do it right now so she gets more comments and engagement uh but if she wants money i'll send her some money too there we go send her some money cute as a bud speaking of if anybody here wants to buy a house yes yeah how's that going i gotta put it on the market oh it's not up yet is it empty yeah it's empty cleaners are going over there today to put in the uh air mattress in the living room but this is a good time to sell a house up here when everything's desolate is what i in sad. No, spring's coming though. Spring's coming pretty quick. It's getting there. Well, obviously this will be fake spring that we're about to do a little bit. I would be concerned, but you haven't stopped your buying habits whatsoever. No. In fact, you've upped it. I've upped it, yeah. Bought a bunch of baseball cards yesterday. And a Michael Jordan statue. Is that what you just opened? Yeah. You bought those with your own money? Yeah. Well, I'll be damned. A Michael Jordan statue? Oh, a little. I'll break it out tomorrow what what's the what it's just a little figurine it's not really a statue it's about about yay tall what's he doing shooting shooting a basketball yeah gotta be a basketball shooting a gun crazy that would be an awesome Michael B Jordan statue of Michael Jordan shooting I kind of want to hear Zah talk more about Africans Of course you do. No, I just thought it was funny, Nick. He says what you're thinking. You get some, Mark. I'm being serious. I'm not even trying to be goofy here. This is serious business. Okay. Is there any African representation in the Winter Olympics? Good question. I actually have no idea. I haven't been watching. I would assume South Africa. South Africa for sure. That's the only place that snows there. elevation um i'm not a big winter winter olympics guy i watched the men's skating yesterday afternoon and there's this guy ilia from the u.s oh yeah and they're calling him the quad god he's impressive his parents were killed in that plane accident like different guy oh no oh maybe he's the only person on the in the world that can do all 24 jumps he did a backflip and a quad watch his routine it's unbelievable yeah they're calling the quad father and the god of quad does what again he one two three four only two figure skating he can do all six types of quad like there's six jumps in an ice skate he's the oh so it's not his like the axle and the sow cow oh i thought like no no no but they're calling him that because his legs you should look after i was looking at his quads in the tights and i'm like holy shit those are quads oh you can only do a quad if you have quads oh quad begets quad do you see is that why they call it no which quad gets in the what you're saying sounds crazy okay i don't the guy running up the hill and skis was crazy that was crazy too did you see that kyle yeah you have to love that guy i heard he did a six minute mile uphill in skis in skis and i have to say i was watching what is it called when the ladies are on the sled like and they're looking down like that's luge skeleton is head first i was watching that i I had my heart pounding. It was like really four in a row. Each lady topped each other for the gold. It was really exciting. They do double luge. I saw the double luge. Boy, how do you get your pops to buy you the equipment for that one? Why are they doing that? Because the weight makes you go faster? There's got to be a better way. The mixed luge. Double luge. Why? Come on. me and a bunch of my mom friends are going to the new ladies sports bar on friday to watch the there's a ladies sports bar yeah it's just uh huh get into a woman's skeleton yeah it's got a passion by the way if there's a ladies sports bar that seems like it will be overrun with men yeah i would just go if it's full of if it's full of ladies who love sports why would men not want to go there first? I think dudes are welcome. And this is probably ladies with standards and taste, which scares men off. What's it called? Pads? I thought you were going. It should be. That's great. Yeah, I'm looking forward to it. The ladies sports bar. There are men's sports bars. It's kind of fucked. That is fucked. You guys need more spaces. Something we can work towards. Thank you. What does the menu look at a place like that? A lot of clams. clam strips clams casino clam strips it's all clam it's all fucking clam clam and ham what's it called? babes I think it's called has anybody been to the clam yet? no it's like three blocks it looks so shitty but that's okay still want to go once you can't just go right you gotta make a reservation you can buy tickets either for a block of I think 90 minutes or I was telling Kyle this from 10.30 to 2am it turns into a Y2K DJ dance party I don't know who the fuck is going to that is it like a functioning bar like normally like when you're buying a ticket for 90 minutes is it like or is it like I can go hang out and get drinks and shoot the shit. It's a bar that turns over a lot, that's changed ownership a lot. The giggity side. Giggity, you know. Oh, we must be at the Clam. I will say there's a very cool bar that's across the street that's on my bucket list. My iconic characters through hilarious photo ops and themed cocktails. Wait a minute, something on your bucket list is across the street from you? Yeah. I have two small kids. I don't get out too much. I got to go to the Clam bar. What is the appeal of the bar? The other bar? It's like a comfy couch. Oh, my God. It was cardboard cutouts. We went definitely crazy. We had the Nacho Joe nachos, which is absolutely insane. Look at this matter. It was absolutely so inner force. Westtown, you understood the assignment. Oh, he knows how to open a burger like an influencer. Yum bite. And pretzel bites for the table. And to top things off, the gummy bear Griffin sundae. Can we put this on the wheel that someone has to go to the Y2K dance party? Oh, maybe not the Y2K dance party. The drunken clam experience. I'll go with you. How much is it? Kate, go on Valentine's Day with beef. We go to the drunken clam for a romantic. A drink ticket and entry, and then I guess you can buy shit from there. Well, across the street is one of the hottest new jazz clubs in town. That's probably not that I'd expect. Everything's across the street. From the drunken clam. You don't plan to go to the drunken clam. If you were on acid with your boys and turned a corner and you're like, is that the drunken thing? That would be awesome. Blue Diamond Almonds and more of the flavorful nut mix. Mixed nuts leveled up. Almonds, cashews, and pistachios in three signature Blue Diamond flavors. Honey roasted smokehouse and roasted sea salt. Freshness is guaranteed. Five grams of protein per serving. other mixed nuts are stale bland and they cannot match blue diamonds flavor and freshness upgrade to the flavorful nut mix blue diamond almonds and more again update upgrade to the flavorful nut mix blue diamond almonds and more um i guess i'll just double up here huh double up cash app just released a new status program for the way people actually spend called cash app green it unlocks new ways for you to pay get rewarded and easily grow or manage your money on your own terms now when you spend at least five hundred dollars a month with the cash app card or cash app pay you earn green status which unlocks benefits like up to two hundred dollars or free overdraft coverage higher borrowing limits and custom personalized cash back offers every friday at places you love to shop turn everyday spending into status with cash app green Download Cash App today or visit cash.app slash new to learn more about this and other great features launching now. For a limited time, new Cash App customers can earn $10 if they use the code cashapp10, cashapp10 in their profile and sign up and send $5 to a friend within 14 days. Terms apply. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App's bank partners. Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank member FDIC. Cash App Green overdraft coverage. Borrow cashback offers and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app slash legal slash podcast for full disclosures. All right. You guys want to spin the wheel? Sure. Get that wheel spinning. You thought of any replacements for wet yet? I need to get on that. Thank you, Danny. You're welcome. I was trying to get through the Super Bowl before I tackled the wet wheel. You made it through. And here we are. You're due to get sick. I am. You're right. Yeah. You're right. You know my sick calendar well. Yeah. As soon as we stop having to work every day, I throw a couple sick days at you. Yeah. All right. All right. We'll see you tomorrow. Bye tomorrow. Thanks. Go. What? Thank you. It's the X Bye guys, see you tomorrow Bye