This is an I Heart podcast. Guaranteed human. For Jack's sake, we'll just refer to him as the K.O.F. It's one more thing. I'm strong and getty. One more thing. Dr. Michael Levitt, a gastroenterologist, became known as the King of Farts. Ah, that can be the topic of the podcast. Do I have to participate in this? You really don't, if you don't want to. Yeah, it's disgusting. Because evidently you have no interest in science. This is from a brand new book that's been written by another gastroenterologist, Trisha Pasricha. Pasricha? Pasricha. Sorry if I got your name wrong, Trisha. Oh, the title of the book is You've Been Pooping All Wrong. But this section of the book also concerns the art of gastroenterology, Jack, specifically flatulence. Hard fart primary. That there's no need for foolishness, Michael. Again, this is a discussion of science. She writes and she is a she, Jack. Science has finally settled the age old debate of who's, oh, I, you know what? It's funny. I've come to the brink. I'm standing on the high dive and I don't want to jump off because it's so, it sounds so childish and base. Yes. Yes, it does. That's my point. Yeah, I thought you were all. Oh, it's science. Just a second ago. I know I do. Well, I climbed the steps to the high dive with great verve and confidence and I got out there and thought, nope. Well, you can do it. I believe in you. Wow. Thanks for that. What are you? Maybe. Chat GPT now. If you give me a few minutes, I could go down to the grade school and get an eight year old and they could come and do this because that's who would appreciate it. I'll use fancy words because it makes me feel better. Science has finally settled the age old debate of whose flatulence is more objectionable men or women. Oh my God, it's even worse than I thought. Oh, it just started. That's right. Science is right. It's the first sentence, Jack. It'll be all right. So anyway, I mentioned Dr. Michael Levitt. It actually gets more interesting in less childish from there. So Levitt one day while a gastroenterology fellow was called into his advisors office and introduced to a new laboratory instrument, the gas chromatograph. And this thing is actually used in many applications. It analyzes gas content in soil. It's used in crime scene investigations. But of course, the two gastroenterologists, it was clear that someone should use it to gain a better understanding of the most pressing of scientific needs and that would be indeed farting. And so an illustrious career was born. Levitt eventually published over 300 original scientific works, has won every prestigious award of the American Gastroenterological Association. He helped develop spacesuits filtered with activated charcoal to prevent astronauts from having to inhale their own flattis during a spacewalk. I'm sure the as we speak these words, the fellows and gal up in space and the Artemis two missioner enjoying his technology right now. That's the best system we had prior was you just kind of have to like toot in your own helmet. Well, yeah, essentially. God. Yeah. The guy with the George Carlin bit on this topic. See you go full Dutch oven in your space suit. And now thanks to this science, Jack, they don't have to toot in their own helmets. Well, and quite literally who smelt it, dealt it. An impressive scent. The spacewalks. Oh, I was trying so hard. So then actually this lady gastroenterologist, this sentence is pretty funny, but it was one particular study that put the gender debate to rest. And it is a study I return to often both in my clinic and at dinner parties where I have on occasion misjudged the room. So this Levitt's character invited 16 healthy men and women to consume items that boost gas production, specifically pinto beans on a synthetic sugar called lactulose. Now, was that a factor in the legendary sugar free gummy bear review that was posted to was at Amazon? The first time. Haribo. Yeah, gummy bears. The first time I read that and spawned many attempts at imitation and you people should be ashamed of yourselves. Quit painting faux Mona Lisa's. I had tears streaming down my cheeks. The first time I read that review. It's brilliantly written and it had to do with the just spectacular a gastrointestinal effects of wolfing down way too much lactulose. See you in hell. Haribo sugar free gummy bears. That's it. Yes. Yeah. Oh, the descriptions are some of the best humor I think that's ever been written in the English language. Yeah. Anyway, but just I'd say, you know, to bring it or whatever, but you don't want to find an imitation. Participants. OK, so they fed the men and women. The Pinto beans and lactulose participants then listen to this. I used to as long time listeners know I would earn five bucks the hard way. Going to college, I was a I would make myself the subject of psychology department experiments, which were always actually pretty interesting. It is an hour of my time and at the time it was decent enough money. It might have been 10 bucks. I don't know. But so participants were fed the beans and lactulose, then they showed up to the laboratory where a rectal tube was inserted and made a gas tight seal with their derriers. Oh, OK. The tube was then connected to a gas impermeable bag. And after releasing what they must, its contents were subsequently evaluated by chromatography, but it gets better. The flat is collected in these bags was then sniffed and rated by two independent judges on who signed up for that. My God. Listen to Jack. He is suffering. Oh, that's so awful. Where they were judged on a linear scale where zero was no odor and eight was very offensive and aggressive scent worth mentioning in the year 2003, popular science ranked Levitt's flat as odor judge is the worst job in science. Oh, zero, you could say congratulations. Your shit doesn't stick. Exactly. Exactly. So their job was terrible, but their contributions were enormous. She writes they found that compared to that of men. Job in science, I'd say. Oh, that's awful. Compared to that of men, the flat is of woman. Women had a much greater odor intensity. But hold your horses. Oh, which reminds me of Kramer and the horse and Seinfeld, of course, that he fed beef for Reno. What was it? Something like that. Yeah. The study also found though that men produced a larger volume of gas per two and Levitt argued that because flat is his ability to simulate the nose is more dependent on volume than on concentration, noxious gas. That is debatable. These differences between the sexes balance out in real life. Hmm. Now, let's see, she takes a shot at teenage boys, which is really mentions their lack of restraint in this. This realm, but final couple of really interesting scientific facts, because I have no interest in debating the man-woman thing. That would just be indelicate. And you know me, Mr. Delicate. You're not going to get me to comment on it. Still in certain situations, she writes, no matter your skills in, you know, controlled expolation, we're all helpless. One such situation is air travel. We are all gassy on a plane. Maybe it's you. Maybe it's your neighbor before you judge anyone aboard. Remember the ideal gas law, PV equals N.R.T. With increasing altitude, air pressure, including intestinal air pressure, falls. Therefore, the volume of your intestinal gas has to expand. The air in your colon is blocked from traveling backward by a small muscular valve connecting it to the small intestine. Are you all relating to this? I don't relate to that. I've not had this experience. Oh my God, you and your fart denial. Well, I just have not had this experience. Does this happen to people on planes? I've never heard anybody mention it in my life. Well, it's because we're trying to be delicate, like I said. But yes, it's nearly universal. Really? Yes. OK. Therefore, the only path Flattis can take is forward and outward, where it joins the recirculating cabin air for the remainder of the flight, which is delightful. But if you need a simple last minute solution to gas our friend and foe, take bismuth sub salisate over the corner. Five hundred and twenty four milligrams by mouth four times a day beforehand will do the job. Bismuth sub salisate, better known as peptobismol, binds and neutralizes more than 95 percent of sulfide gases in the gut. Another landmark discovery from the great Dr. Levitt. There you go. Worst job on science. The K.O.F. right there. I enjoyed the information just about as much as I loved the just look of disgust on Jack's face. Yeah. Yeah. I am the only time ever in 30 years I've ever been ashamed to be a part of this. Well, it was it was disgust and like being beaten down. Yeah. It kind of combined into a delightful. Nice little disgust and defeat. Crushing of his spirit. You had to feed. That's the word. If it was defeated there. Well done, Dr. Levitt. Your name will live on in glory. Well done, sir. I tried to activate my glutes as best I could between. They never stayed activated. Well, I guess that's it.
