46 - Fear Delays Your Destiny | How to Stop Missing Your Moment

Welcome to the Impact Podcast. I'm Eddie Wilson, here to help you visualize what others cannot see. Create opportunities where others have failed, and push you to build empires where once there was empty space. Let's embark on this journey together and make a difference in this world. Welcome to the Impact Podcast with Eddie Wilson. Really excited to come to you today with a new concept and this idea that a truth that most people won't tell you. The truth that most people won't tell you is that God can give you an opportunity, but He won't make you ready for it. Your job as an entrepreneur is to be ready for the opportunities. In this podcast, I want to say just as a way of introduction, I just want to say thank you for all the listenership and the viewership and all the shares. We've had over a million downloads in the first 45 episodes and it's just been an awesome opportunity for me to share the insights and the stories and the lessons that I've learned along the way. And so as we share this one today, I hope that you will help me with this, that you will not only listen to it for yourself, but also for those that could need it. And if you wouldn't mind share that with somebody of a person pops in your head as you hear these concepts or thoughts or ideas, make sure you share that with them. And then also, again, continue to communicate with me and let me know the things you'd like for me to talk about. One, just quick thought as we jump in is that a lot of you, I get a lot of feedback where people will binge watch these shows. They'll tell me, I watched the last 10 episodes. And I'd like to kind of warn you about that and say that really these are intentional with the thought of developing leaders and leadership, developing entrepreneurs, developing people. And so one thing that I would suggest is that you don't binge watch them. You listen to them systematically, systematically listen to them for the week and then you apply. You listen to it for another week and then you apply. I think sometimes when you binge listen to these, it's good because you pick up all the information but then you miss the application. And every single week I'm giving you something to apply. I'm giving you a challenge to try to implement in your life almost as if you are one of the leaders on my team. Speaking to you as if you were a part of my team and I'm mentoring you and teaching you and guiding you and trying to help develop you. And so instead of just like a shotgun approach, I'd love for you to take them systematically and make application each and every week. So the concept today is that you can have all the opportunities in the world but if you don't and are not prepared to take advantage of them, there's a real tragedy here. There's a tragedy in the fact that you're not able to handle it when it comes. The real tragedy isn't not having a chance. Most people have chances in their life. Very few people go through life without chances or opportunity. But many people go through life when the opportunity or chance hits, they miss the opportunity that is right in front of them. You want to make sure that as these opportunities reveal themselves, that you are mature enough and character enough to handle them as they come. You don't rise to the level of your calling. You fall to the level of your character and your systems. And you hear me talk about systems and character often with regard to empire. But I want to give you just two quick stories and then I'll give you some principles to apply this week. The first story is I'm five years old and I want a dog really, really bad. I don't know if you've ever been there before where you have a desire. Well, my dad was one of those dads that really didn't want the responsibility of a dog. He didn't want to feed the dog. He didn't want to pay for the food for the dog. He didn't want to have to walk the dog. He didn't want the mess in the yard from the dog. And so my mom, however, loves animals and was all about it. And so, you know, for a while, I would just pest her my dad about, can I have a dog? Is there a way I could get a dog? I'll take care of it. And a lesson to my mom taught me, I think I was actually six at the time. She said, you know, you keep asking your dad for a dog. And she said, but do you think that you're really prepared for it? She said, you know, your dad has a lot of reservations about you getting this dog because he doesn't want to care for it. He wants to believe that you can care for it. And she said, in preparation for getting one, what if we just acted as if you had one? And I said, okay, so we went to the store and we bought a dog dish and we bought food and we bought a leash and she said, act as if you have this dog every day in front of your dad. She said, put the food in the bowl and show your dad that you're willing to feed it. She said, dump the food back in. She was like, literally, just walk through the practice of having a dog every day and show your dad for a long period of time that you're willing to do this. She said, in preparation for what you want, she said, act as if it's already there. And so, you know, one of those amazing lessons as a child at six years old, I literally would have a dog dish and I'd pour the dog food in addition. And we, you know, I would walk outside and have the leash and all these things. And I would do all these things in preparation or showing my dad that I was willing to do all the work that it took to actually get this dog. Long story short, I got a black conqueror spaniel named Satin and I had to take care of it every single day and it was a lot more work than what I expected. But it was the preparation that allowed my dad, my father to go ahead and take that chance with me. And I think that that simple story is so important because oftentimes we find ourselves wishing and praying and thinking and meditating on the things we want. And instead of spending all that energy on desiring, thinking, praying, wishing, what if we spent the exact amount of time in preparation, in walking the dog before the dog is there and feeding the dog before the dog is there? There's also a biblical story that I love and enjoy and heard so much as a kid. And it's this story of Moses and the promised land. I've never heard this story before but you've got Moses who is commanded to take the children of Israel into the promised land. And it's both historical and metaphorical but God has prepared for his people this amazing place. And in the book of Numbers in the Bible it talks about it's the land flowing with milk and honey and it's just like it's picture-esque and it's kind of description and it's got all the things that you want and all the things that they desire. And so Moses decides to send 12 men into the land to go spy it out and see what they're dealing with before they just go into it. Instead of just walking into this land they believe that God had given it to them but he wanted to send them in. So they called them the spies, the 12 spies. So the 12 spies come back and two of them, one by the name of Caleb, right, comes back and says, hey, let's do it. God called us to take it. We're ready. Let's go. And Ten said, no, no, there's giants in the land like these people, they're going to essentially squish us. They're going to kill us. They're going to defeat us. We shouldn't go in. And so Ten come back with the story of we can't do it. It's impossible. And in the end it's kind of a story. I think it's both historical in the Bible that it's also metaphorical for us in that so much of the opportunity that lies ahead of us is met with, you know, a small percentage of desire and anticipation, excitement and so much of the opportunity is met with fear and is it going to be possible? And the craziest thing is then the story goes on and progresses and God because of their unbelief and their fear and their lack of taking what was rightfully theirs and taking that opportunity, they end up wandering in the desert, the wilderness for 40 years, right? And that generation essentially dies off without ever getting to see the promise land. They miss their moment, right? And that's the story. And so two stories for you, it's the story of preparation for the dog. And I end up getting the dog. It's the story of these Israelites wandering in the desert for 40 years, missing their moment. And the point I want to make to you today is is that fear delays your destiny. And sometimes it disqualifies you from experiencing it. I almost feel like there's a moment if you think of your life on a timeline and there's these moments on this timeline that are going to hit. And maybe we call that destiny, right? And it's kind of this moment that's essentially awaiting you. And then you've got this timeline that's just kind of ever increasing and you're going down this timeline. And the moment of destiny is essentially there and almost immovable. And in preparation for that, we make choices and and almost anticipate or desire it or want it, but never actually prepare for it. And so I want to just give you a couple of reasons this morning on why you miss your moment, right? Why you're not prepared for the destiny and some, some, you know, just kind of warning so that it doesn't disqualify you from experiencing it, right? And we've all had those moments where we just weren't ready. You know, whether it was the big game in sports or whether it was the first chance that you got to start as a starter in sports or whatever it was like this moment, this moment where there was a promotion that was right in front of you and in your place of work or business, but you got passed over. And it's all about, well, what are we doing to make sure we're not missing that moment? Okay. So why do we miss the moment? Number one, oftentimes in anticipation, you desire it, you pray for it, you meditate on it, but you've never prepared for it. And so instead of, um, instead of thinking and wishing and desiring, like I said, I believe that we should spend the time in preparation. What if instead of sitting there thinking about the job promotion you want or the raise you want, you go ahead and take the steps as if you already have it. You say, well, that seems presumptuous. No, it seems prepared. It should be something that you are taking those steps for. Like if you want the vice president job, if you want to see your job, act as if you already have it today, right? Like take those initiatives as if it's yours. The second thing is is that when you're given the opportunity, you still have to walk in it. You still have to walk through it. You can't just experience it by being aware of it, right? Like you have to walk into the moment. The moment requires readiness, not just a belief, not just a belief that it's going to happen, not just a belief that I'm going to get the dog, but it's the preparedness. It's the readiness of here's all the things that I've done for when I do. You want to be the CEO? Well, what have you done to essentially qualify yourself to be the CEO? You want to be the head of whatever department? Well, what have you done? You say, well, I want to do a million dollars in sales. Well, what have you already done in preparation to do the million dollars? You're doing 300,000, 500,000, a million. You say, I want to get to a billion. What have you done in your life to prepare yourself and qualify yourself for the billion? You see, there's something in the energy of our human experience that if we will just live as if, if we will act as if it's so, then it seems to naturally just come to us. It just seems to naturally come to us. My 19-year-old son now, we talked a lot about he wanted to ride motorcycles, and I've rode motorcycles my whole life and loved them, and he wanted to get a motorcycle. What I said to him was, if you intend to get a motorcycle, desire to get a motorcycle, go do all the things necessary ahead of time to have a motorcycle. Go take the courses, go get your license, go do all the things so that when you do have the money and the opportunity presents itself, you're already prepared. Don't wait to buy the motorcycle and then get all the things or do all the things in order to qualify yourself for it. Does that make sense? That's number one. You've prayed for it, but you never prepared for it. Number two, you fear what's ahead more than what you've been created to be or do. It's this thought. If you go back to that Bible story about these 12 spies who went into the land and 10 came back and said, no, there's giants in the land. We're never going to defeat the people. There's never going to be the ability to co-exist in this space. There's not going to be room for us. There's a point here to be made. That is the giants in the land didn't cancel the promise that God had already made to the people. Like he had already said, this is your place to go. Those giants didn't cancel the promise. You know, the issues that you will face in possessing or acting in that new opportunity do not cancel the promise or the opportunity. What it does is it confirms that it's worth something. There's nothing in your life that has value that isn't worth fighting or striving or working towards. Think about all the things in your life that you possess that you put or ascribe value to. All of them came with struggle, with a fight, with work. All those things that came easy, you lessen their value. The giants in the land only prove that that land is actually worth it. That makes sense. Why would they be there if the land had no value? If the land was desolate, if the land was not worth it? All the things that you desire, the things you're praying for, the things you're wishing for, the things you're working and striving for, will only have value to the degree that there is some level of opposition in it. To just say I want to be CEO and be granted it tomorrow and it be easy does not ascribe value in the human experience. Most leaders fold under pressure because they fixate on resistance. They fixate on resistance, not the vision. If you fixate on the vision, what happens is the resistance is just a part of the experience. When you fixate on the resistance, then the resistance is the experience. Get interviewed on a lot of podcasts and maybe stages sometimes and I'll get asked this question and they'll say, tell me about your failure. Tell me about the issues. I struggle oftentimes to go back to the moment of failure because the moment of failure was just resistance along the way. I've worked so hard at trying to train my mind and making sure that I'm not focusing on this thing that happened that was negative, but yet a focus on the vision of where I'm heading so that negative, that resistance or that seeming failure is just a stepping stone along the way. If you focus on the failure, oftentimes that's the experience. If you focus on the vision, then the failures along the way are just resistance that actually provides the vision value. Number three, you've surrounded yourself with the wrong voices and this is important. As you grow in your life and in your human development and in your business and in your all the things that you've got going on in the personal world and in the professional world, that when you put the wrong voices around you, the fear and the problems begin to escalate. Think about it this way. If you go back to those stories, you've got the 10 spies that are the voice of fear. We can't go. We can't do this. You've got the two that are saying, let's go. What happens if we would have sent different spies into that land? What if you would have doubled down on the two that were positive and excited and motivated versus the 10 that were negative and fear-based? In your life, are you surrounding yourself with negative, fear-based, antithetical, opposition, or are you surrounding yourself with people who want to go accomplish something, who are aligned with the vision, who are passionate with where you're headed? You can't just win in life with common people who have no desire or vision. I know that as a leader, what you want to do is you want to essentially put yourself in this pinnacle situation where you are the leader you're the top and everybody else is leaning on you or resting on you to go to the big place, to the vision. I got to say that that is weak leadership. What you need to do is put people around you who push you and drive you and don't allow you to see anything else other than the vision. If everyone around you, there should only be so many times that you allow the negative common voices to speak to the fears that you have. If you notice that if for instance, if you have a fear, I'm never going to make it, I'm never going to be good enough, I'm not going to have enough money, I'm not going to have enough accomplishments, whatever those fears are, if you notice that everyone around you, the common voice is speaking to those fears, you have the wrong people around you. If the common voice is saying, no, that's not worth dwelling on, that's not worth thinking, let's develop, let's push, let's go. If that common voice is pushing you beyond your fears, not speaking to your fears, now you have the right people around you. If the masses are speaking to the fears that you already possess inside, you've put the wrong people around you, you surround yourself with the wrong voices. You know, in that story, you had two people with warrior mindsets that were wanting to go, possess, take advance and you had 10 that were speaking to fear. Number four, you don't make decisions fast enough, this is a more practical one. So let me just go back through him, you've prayed for it, you never prepared for it, you fear what's ahead more than what you are created to be or created to do, you surround yourself with the wrong voices and you didn't make decisions fast enough. Oftentimes in the hesitation is the gap in which you miss your moment. You hesitate and you lose it. Opportunities are often time sensitive. If you don't move an alignment, the moment will move on. One thing that I've noticed in my own life is that let's just say the moment this opportunity is going to be given to someone or something. You know, if you think about it in the context of let's just say sports, you've prepared, you're ready, you're sitting on the bench and the coach finally calls your name. If all of a sudden you take off the warm up and you realize like, oh, I forgot to put on my jersey because I'm so used to not playing and you just end up thinking, why didn't I'm not going to play? So I'm just going to put the the warm up over the over a t-shirt versus a jersey and you're going to take it off and realize I don't have the jersey on. What's your coach going to do next person in line? That's life. That's the moment, right? Like when you miss it because of preparedness or whatever it is, a lack of preparedness, what happens is that moment just moves on to the next person. Think about the times you've been passed over. Think about the times that you've missed your shot or your opportunity. Think about the times that you've been given the chance to actually succeed and grow and take that next step up. And when you miss it, it moves on to someone else. Be prepared, right? And then also make sure that in the time-sensitive nature that you step into it, hesitation kills momentum. Hesitation kills momentum. I've watched so many people that as I've tapped them on the shoulder like, okay, it's time to lead they hesitate. What you need to do is when you're tapped to lead or the moment comes, it's time to take a breath. It's time to think back. It's not time to hesitate. And then make a conscious choice as to what you want to do, right? And so opportunities are time-sensitive. If you don't move and align at the moment, the moment will move on. So here's a couple of things that I want you to do. Here's the challenge. Number one, build while you wait. Build while you wait. As you are waiting for the opportunity, you're praying for you. Think about it. You're meditating on it. Build. Make sure you're prepared for it. Systems, teams, messaging, right? Decision-making frameworks. When I have the opportunity, this is the choice I'm going to make. When I get the chance to lead, this is what I'm going to do. Dream and think about those moments and prepare for them. Number two, train your fear response. When the pressure hits or the opportunity hits, will you shrink or will you strike? Will you begin to pull back? Will you win? Will you hesitate? Or will you lean in? And when you think through those processes, when you're building while you wait, when the opportunity comes, you're prepared and you begin to lean in. Practice decisive leadership in small things. When you are given opportunities to make choices, practice decisive leadership, practice decisive decision-making. Don't always wait for the collaboration. Don't always wait for the group think. Step into it. Make decisive decisions and lean on them. Fear is always a part of the journey. And that's just a natural place. We have to train that fear response. Leaders do not ever act in fear. Leadership and Ford momentum and fear are at opposition. There's two great emotions in life. We've talked about this on previous podcasts. There's fear and love. Fear is essentially resisting something or running from something. Love is passionately moving towards something. We need to move as leaders in love. And then number three, you better know the people that have the warrior mindset. Make sure that you're aligning yourself with people who are moving forward, who are taking advantage of the opportunities. Keep people around you that remind you about where the vision is. Keep people around you that remind you what you're striving for. Do your friends amplify your fear or do your friends amplify your faith? Are your friends around you cheering you on and saying, look, let's go for it. Let's do it. Or they amplify your fear. Here's the last piece and we'll close with this is that there are moments in front of you right now. There are moments that are beginning to present yourselves. There's a conversation that you're avoiding right now. There's a deal that you're hesitating on. You know that you've got a potential opportunity but you're hesitating. There's a leadership change that you know is due and right, but you won't pull the trigger. All of these things as they come to mind right now are preparation for what is about to come. Where are you headed? What dream is inside? What passion are you pursuing? Now let's step into that. Let's take one step this week. Let's begin to walk into that place. Don't be the 10 that say, you know what? Based on all of this fear, all this opposition, I'm going to resist. Be the two that walks in. Be the person that is buying the dog food that's buying the leash that's walking in in life as if it's already so. I think that you are not waiting on clarity. Right now you're avoiding responsibility. We all have a responsibility in this life to act on the abilities to act on the gifts and the talents we've been given. And for you, a little bit of just kind of push is that it's not about having enough clarity to take the next step. It's about walking in responsibility for all the opportunity you have. Think about every person around you that has less than you have. Think about the person that has less experience, less opportunity, less you know, ability, whatever it is. Now walk in what you've been given. Take that step. Be a responsible person. Make the move. Build the system. Take that that territory, right? Like take that space. Let's walk in it and let's make sure that we're not missing our moment. Thanks so much for being a part of the podcast and for listening today. I'd love to connect with you further and you can connect with me on social media at Eddie Wilson official on any of the social media channels.