You know what I've learned, Chris? The cooler the music, the better you sound. I like how, I don't hear from Joan for like an hour. And then Chris comes in and starts being a smart alecky and guess what we hear is a Joan Jones gaffa. A faint Joan giggle from Manchester. Yes. That's exactly right. So this is one of those moments. And by the way, I love, one guy says, what did he say? 3618 says, Dan, you're a boil on my arse. I still like you though. Is that a compliment? We all have that one boil. We just did the work. Do we have that one boil? It's my best boil. So I'm going through that Busy B commercial. This happens all the time. I can never get cocky because the second I do, I shank it. What do you shank? I'm reading the commercial. Well, see, this is the thing and I read this, I love Busy B, but I'm reading it a little bit under protest because in the copy, they say 1199 and what is it like, 1599 or something like that. I have to say $1,599. But for some reason, when I'm in the middle of a commercial, I can't say the words 99. And so I screwed it up. Just say 1599. That's what I've been doing. I have had people say that they called up Busy B and they're mad at me because they're looking for $11.99. No, they didn't. I promise you that's happened. And so I'm a little- They might have said that to you, but I doubt that they actually called Busy B. I don't know. Also, it would prove the commercials work. Well, that's certainly true. They've been with me for a long time. So apparently they do, but it's just like, but I'm going through that commercial and I'm like, this is what happens in the mind of Mantis. Then we're going to move on. I'm thinking in midway through the commercial, I'm thinking, you know, I've had like, I don't know, a bunch of commercials today. I don't think I've screwed up one. Right, Joan? I was like, I've had a pretty good commercial day. That's like saying, hey, there's no rain in the sky. That's exactly right. She must be for a huge storm. And then I hit that damn line about 1,199. And I screwed it up the first time. And then I screwed up the 1599. And it's like, that's God telling me, I will never get cocky. Humble yourself. I think, Matt, what is it when I always see Joan, first thing in the morning, Joan says, how are you doing? Or people say, how are you doing? And I always say, doing great, plenty of time to train wreck. You know what I mean? And certainly that is the case with 3D and commercial copy. By the way, Joan, it's great to see that Chris has actually made it on time. I was gonna do a wellness check to make sure, you know, how funny is it that I'm not actually worried about the welfare of Chris's kids as Virginia is gone. I'm actually worried about the welfare of Chris. Please pray for me. Yeah, I mean, prayers for Chris, man. Virginia is not back until Monday evening. We're on hour 28 of dad and four kids. Didn't you like call your parents to come or something? No, no. Okay. I've listed notes that I've been referring to. So does your wife do what my wife does? Emergency numbers are on the fridge. Yeah, exactly. She will leave me like an entire, what is this, eight and a half by 11? So eight and a half by 11, both sides on notes about what to do in case, you know, like something goes wrong. If she goes off to do whatever it is that she does when she has to go out of town. And so now the nice thing is that when Riker was, you know, really young, that it would be like, you know, both sides of a piece of paper. As it's gotten older now, she actually leaves Riker notes on how to take care of me. That's great. That's fantastic. Yeah, I know. But how- Chris, how many times have you called your wife and said, what do I do? None. I'm too proud for that, Joan. I won't admit it. I'll just, oh, I missed that. But she left me detailed notes. She left, we have a couple of sitters that are hanging out with the kids today and then Monday. And then she went above and beyond and ordered me all the food that I would need from Aldi and Walmart. That's what my wife does for me too, bless her heart. And I don't mean that in the snarky Southern kind of way. She helped you, Chris. It was a big help. Now, did she say, okay, the fish sticks 400 degrees at 15 minutes? What the fish? Why, does she do that? No. Dan, where are you? No, it's not. What? What are you? Are you a gay fish? Oh, he doesn't, he's not gonna get the reference. It's a South Park thing. Do you know what I love about Sam? Nothing. This is in your average podcast. This pot is about to be crazy. I don't even know what's gonna happen. This is full send. It's just like a boy scrap. Join the party. We threw like a spontaneous party. Out of nowhere, it was crazy. And we pulled off a crazy prank. Pranks, parties and viral culture at its wildest. Just seeing like the guys that you brought in and like seeing their different personalities and stuff. It's been entertaining, dude. So this could be the greatest content build of all time, bro. The full send podcast. Dude, let's get ready to rumble. Follow and listen on your favorite platform. Let's do it. This thing. Anyway, we've been right along. I'm just kidding, Sam. I'm just kidding. So anyway, I don't, whatever about the fish sticks. Here we go, TB on the text line. Quit being a complaining wuss, Chris. If you can't take care of your kids on your own for three days, you don't deserve to be a dad. Oh, okay. Oh, that was mean. That was a cheap shot. Wow. Anyway, well, no, your kids are still alive. They're rocking. Yeah. All the limbs are still there. Yeah, for the most part. We got plenty of digits. Well, listen, I know that your wife ordered you a bunch of food and left you some very specific instructions. So I'm sure that you've been slaving over a hot stove. A little bit. A little bit? A little bit. Okay. What, to heat up something? How many stove are those on you? No, you know what? I think that Chris has a confession to make. Does your wife know that you've been ordering Uber Eats? Not yet. She does now. We caved. I caved. Did you cave? I caved at about hour nine. Nine hours. It was about hour nine. I said, you know, I've been working hard. I'm gonna take something off my plate. Is in and out on Uber Eats yet? It is not. We did, what was it, Firebirds in Murfreesboro? It's awesome. It's awesome. You know, Chris, I think TB then may have a point. Oh, whatever. Whatever. You know what's interesting about Uber Eats? We decided in our house that in 2026, we were going to start trying to save money. So the deal was, I was going to stop going to comic coffee because I was spending a lot of money on comic coffee. I'm just gonna tell you I was. So I- By the grace of God, Wally's Bean Machine came into your life to make it a little bit easier for you. I'm gonna admit something like, I was having a hard time kicking the Starbucks. Wally's Bean Machine came in and I save about 10 bucks every single day. Because- Wow. And here's the other thing. That adds up. Wally's Bean Machine dot com, people. You wanna upgrade the coffee service in your office, Wally's Bean Machine dot com. Office morale through the roof. And you get the added bonus of a cool guy named Wally coming into your place of business every once in a while. That's exactly right. So, but here's what Wally has done for me. So not only am I saving 10 bucks a day on Starbucks coffee, but when I would go in, I would have one of their really, really fattening pastries. And I don't have the pastries anymore, so I'm losing weight as well. Slim, trim, and saving money. The only thing getting fat is your wallet, Dan. Well, that's not getting carried away at working radio. So anyway, we're glad to see that you are surviving. By the way, if we ask Kennedy how things are going, what would she say? I think she would say pretty good. I think she would say, I'm doing a pretty good job. PG, if we're pretty good, how loud are you? We kinda, we kinda, no, I don't do that, but we kinda flaunt the rules a little bit. We've extended bedtime just a hair. You do suck as a dad. No, you know what we really do. That's what dads are for. You want to name me? Listen, so my eight-year-old and my 12-year-old, they get to stay up a little bit late, but my six-year-old and my eight-year-old share a room. The boys do. So we have to be very sneaky, or it creates a bit of a kerfuffle in the house. Oh. I'll tell Brooks, just lay down until he falls asleep, and then he can sneak out. Get out of town. Wow. That's what we do, we do it all the time. That's pretty good, actually. Wow. And he does it. He's like, you got it, dad. You know, Joe, and I think you, the three of us can agree that a good part of parenting is manipulation. That's true. Oh, yes. As a former child, yes. Yeah. So I think one of the most beneficial things for Chris is that the oldest is a girl, and she's probably, I bet you lean on her a whole lot. Oh, 100%. She has been unbelievably awesome. Is Kennedy listening right now? No, probably not. She doesn't. Kennedy, if you happen to listen to this at some point in time, tell your dad you need an allowance. And you need an allowance higher than the other kids, for two reasons. Number one, because you deserve more, but number two, because I think- They can flake it and claims here. I think that it would be great to see all the kids battling because one of you gets a higher allowance than the rest. Although, I don't know, do you do allowance in your house? Not really. We kind of just do one-offs for random jobs. Oh, you know what? People are yelling at me. Why? Oh, because you forgot the bit that you stole from that other radio show? The woke. Ha, ha, ha, ha. I didn't steal the Woking Dead from anyone. I thought we were supposed to be doing in Manus this morning more on here. Well, I stole that one, so we're not gonna- What's the old saying? It's like something borrowed, something shared. It's exactly right. Something blue, something new. But people are actually asking for it. I didn't realize. See, you know what I said? Was that this morning, Joan? When I sent Joan and I a text all the time, let's see. I forget exactly what I said, but basically I said I suck at bits, and that's why I don't do them. Yeah. So yeah, I'm terrible at bits. Like you're really good, because you've got that hip hop music, DJ background thing that you do. It has nothing to do with music. You just forget all the time, Dan. Shut up, Jane. It has to do with consistency, Dan. Joan, Shingan, Shingan, Shingan, Shingan, Shingan, Kawa. Just call me Kawa. Just call you Kawa. Oh, that's actually, that's very, do I have some audio over here? All right, so hey, you know what it's time for? The Woking Dead. Everyone's favorite, everyone's- Two days in a row? Everyone's favorite secondhand segment. Whatever. It's a hand me down. I thought our favorite secondhand segment was- Mandus is a moron in the mornings. Here is that too. By the way, it's not a hand me down, it's a dan me down. Oh, I like it, I like it. Yeah, but it kind of comes down from Chris, because this is sort of like the lightning round, right? No, this isn't even close to the lightning round. Then why is there thunder? That's true. I don't have thunder in the Woking Dead. You have stories like that. You have stories. Back and in between every story, you play your Woking Dead, right? It's basically like you took the lightning round, and you took White Woman Wednesday, and you made them have a baby, and it's the Woking Dead. Nobody wants to have a baby with those White Women. Well, they just run to Planned Parenthood. Oh, no. Control all the way. That we have featured. Oh, that's terrible. It is terrible. Okay, so based on all of this, I need to find- You're scraped. I didn't even- He doesn't even have one ready. Shut up. No, I do. Let's see here. Not my household, not my neighborhood. George Conn- all right, here we go. You ready? All right, all right, let's go. I found it. Am I- Make shift man to set the ready. Am I up? This is not White Woman. This is White Man Friday. Take that. As a matter of fact, this is, and I did make mention of this earlier, I've got video. This is George Conway, of course, a former Mr. Kellyanne Conway, and he is complaining about the fact that he spent a million dollars giving to Joe Biden. Listen to this. I was asked by a friend of mine who's a, who raises money for Democrats to speak at a big Democratic fundraiser for what was then the Biden victory fund. And I remember I was actually driving out to my friend, John Gardner's house out in Maryland. And I was thinking about, well, how much money should I give to the Biden campaign for this thing where I'm gonna be the headline spokesperson and asking other people to give. And I thought I'd give a lot of money, but a reasonable amount of money. And then I started thinking about it. And it's like, you know, I mean, this is supposed to, it's money that my kids would otherwise inherit. And I started thinking about that. So what am I gonna give? And then I just thought about it. Well, what do I want to make kids to inherit? And I literally was in tears. I pull over to the side of the road and I was in tears thinking about this. And it's like, I love my kids. You're a grown man pulling over, crying because you're gonna donate your kids inheritance. Well, that's what he did. He don't, so he donated his kids. And I'm gonna spare everybody all the George Conway. But it's a lot of George. He donated a million dollars of basically, he describes it, his kids inheritance to Joe Biden, a guy who for four years, we heard stuff like this. And Joan, Shingang, Shingam, Shinga. Would you give a million dollars to this? Now we know why the daughter has such severe TDS because every time she sees Donald Trump, she thinks that's, there goes my inheritance. There's my inheritance. Oh yeah, I mean, see that is absolutely right. And that way, that's the reason why I would call George Conway the Woking Dead. That's what I would say about, it's not a lightning round. Hello, can't you hear the theme? It's the Woking Dead. We need more lightning. We need more Woking Dead. That's what it is. All right, there you go. You know what we really need. What's that? Hey there, I'm Paula Pan. I help people make the smartest money decisions possible. Do not ever worry about your salary. You need enough to make sure that you aren't in a bad financial position. Once you have that, your salary becomes moot. What matters from that point forward, upside gains. Any type of ownership stake or ownership potential, that's the money. Remember, you can afford anything, just not everything. Afford anything. Follow and listen on your favorite platform. I could have used a little more cowbell. Could have. Should have. Whatta. Anyway, so there you go. Got any big plans this weekend? No. That was a bit of a snark right before. No, just in the five o'clock hour, I was regaling the audience with, we're gonna go fly Rikers RC airplane this weekend. I think you know, but I never. Did you pick out a tree? No, we have not picked out a tree. But for people that missed the five o'clock, I didn't even talk about this on the air, but Riker flew his RC airplane into a second tree. There's been a second tree, sir. I threw my arm out, trying to get it through rocks at the plane to get it out of the tree. It didn't, we left Charlie Daniels Park. And lo and behold, this is such an amazing story. You know that the first plane was saved by listener Allie. Correct, Fly Girl Allie. Fly Girl Allie on the chat. Wonderful lady, awesome husband. On the other side of Charlie Daniels Park, sat Rikers plane. Allie, who saved the first plane, is walking Charlie Daniels Park, and what does she find Rikers plane again? This time falling from the tree right to her feet. No way. She found the second plane. How is that possible that Allie rescued the first plane, and then the second plane falls out of the tree after two days in the tree, and Allie happens to be walking right there. This is an implausible story, and I think Allie's stalking you. Yeah, I feel like she has to be. Yep. Okay, couple things. I've been stalked by a lot worse. And number two, I actually welcome a stalker like Allie. She's very nice, she's helpful. She's very cool. Some stalkers are just creepy and weird. This one's like helping me with my issues. Some stalkers put dog poop on your front porch, but not Allie, she brings me a plane. Anyway. I think it goes to say that RC planes can't break tree branches. True. No, anyway, so, can I just be honest? I don't know half the things of what Sam says. That's why just so people know when Sam speaks, I just gloss right over, because I don't know what the hell he's talking about. Well, he's been doing low-key 9-11 references. Oh, is that what that is? There's been a second tree, sir. And then he said, you know, RC planes can't break tree branches, jet fuel can't melt steel beams. Because nothing beats 9-11 jokes. Kinda, 13 and what, 13 and a half years for tragedy to become comedy? It's too soon, Sam. It's too soon. I think it's more than 13 and a half years. How many, how long? It's a formula for tragedy to comedy. Oh, is that? Yeah. Oh, okay. Comedy is tragedy plus time. You know what the tragedy is of my show today? Sam has been speaking too much. Oh. Sam, I'm just kidding. I love you, man. Yeah, Sam, he's just kidding after saying it 12 times. It had nothing to do with the busy beat commercial. It was all Sam. All right, Joan was coming up in the news. Seriously, you wanna know what's coming up in the news? It'd be nice, cause I might have stuff to say. Okay. And it's time for me to go home. Yes, it definitely is time for you to go home. Hey there, I'm Paula Pan. I help people make the smartest money decisions possible. Joe, you know what's been great about being a saver? For money to make. And that money over the past couple of years has made a pretty good yield. Pre-pandemic, money was making zero. Now it's actually making something, but that's starting to go down, down, down. I love how we can play the fact that inflation's been really high. As a positive, but if you're a saver, you know what that means, to change. Silver lining, Joe, silver lining. Afford anything, follow and listen on your favorite platform.
