Mob Adjacent with Jeff & Monica

And now, The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly. We have very special, very special guests. Very special guests. They are the owners of the Pastrami House in Morristown, New Jersey. They are the winners of the, what was the contest called? Well, the charity, he bid, the highest bid, and this is the prize. What was the charity? Was it to get Call Her Daddy More Chairs in their studio? I believe so. Okay, good, good, good. Call her daddy needed some new stage lights. They could have picked any other show, and he picked ours. They picked ours. Well, they're trying to have fun. Well, yeah, they don't like talk. They like fun. Yeah. You know what I mean? If you go over to Radio Andy, no one's going to eat your food over there. This guy's got to keep their buttholes clear. That's right. For gay sex, Jacob. Yeah. I got you. Oh, I didn't know if you did. Yeah, unless you don't like it clean. They'll call it the old peanut butter and jelly without the jelly. It is Jeff and Monica Michelson. Am I saying it right? Michelson? Yes, sir. Michelson, yeah. Michelson. Hey, Jacob, I'll do it. You just sit there and eat your food. Oh, Jacob just had more food than he said. He's got a lump in his belly right now. I've never seen... Let me tell you something. Jacob had bread for the first time since 87. I've been doing the show for two years. I've never seen Jacob happy at the beginning of the show. Let me tell you more of what I don't like about this right here. I brought in so many delicious, not necessarily healthy for you treats. Yep. And he's, no, he couldn't possibly. Couldn't even take a bite. No way. My stromboli. Oh. World famous stromboli. So good. What about the meatballs? My mom's meatballs. My mom's meatballs was so good. What about the time I brought the new sub shop that opened? I brought like 15 subs in. Nope. This guy decides to wait till a fucking Jewish sandwich day and fist fuck his mouth. Yeah. Thick fuss Fist fucking stupid mouth Full of meat sandwiches And you I went down Thick cut Rye bread I went down there You don't deserve it I go Jacob's not gonna eat any of it He goes Today I am Today I am Why don't you save up For stromboli day too Dick You make me feel You know what I make me feel You make me feel You make me feel Like Nicky Dinky To Wendy Williams That's how I feel When I bring my treats in for you Oh That hit home It did right Because remember how She treated her I do the worst. That's how I feel. That's how you treated me. I don't want you to feel that. Do you see how we treated Jeff and Monica? We treated them like Jerry O'Connell. We were like, mmm, you cut this corned beef yourself? Whoa! Where do you get your corning for your beef? You know what? Don't even tell me. It's a special recipe. I don't want to know the secret. The empanada with, what is it? It's a corned beef empanada. Pastrami empanada. Like I said, pastrami empanada. Don't ever correct me on my show. We'll kick you out of here right now. Well, Bobby. Not you, dude. It was pastrami. We'll get her out. What if we kicked her out and he stayed? He just shows, he goes, babe, babe, I'll see you at home. Just stop. You were being... Listen, you did your part two in there. Yeah. Yeah, they were a bit much, but you did your thing, too. Yeah, it's that Spanish in you. You're learning to... Now, you're... What kind of Spanish are you? My family's from Ecuador. Ecuador. Okay. And you are Italian? I'm kidding. Close. Chewishy. I swear to God, Jay, when I was downstairs, I saw Jacob talking to these people. I thought they were like, you know, people that worked here. And then I walked up and they were like, oh, this is the couple that's bringing all the food. I just expected you to be just a little fatter, a little more dumpier of a couple. How dare you. Thank you. He's got a successful deli. He's got cash. He started getting involved in sex tourism and he found Monica in whatever fucking hovel she lived in on some goofy island. That's crazy. Well, hey, Monica, welcome to America. I'm glad he sponsored you. I think if you stay married for like five more years, you don't have to be with him anymore. Then you can go do what you want. Get an OnlyFans, do whatever you want. Take care of that deli, turn it into a taco stand. Oh, my cheeks are turned on. At least it's from laughing this time. So I don't understand You own this amazing place And you're both In shape I mean dude you're shredded You know what if Jacob took the Captain America drug That's what he would look like They don't get high on their own supply That's what's secret dude I can take my shirt off if you want Yes I do Hang on Take it off I'm not Rich Voss Calm down. Calm down. He wanted to, though. You wanted to because you've been working out a lot. He wanted to show us his body. Dude, he wanted to really bad. And then so he could say it to her, he goes, Mon, yo, Mon, you see when everyone was appreciating my body? I assume he calls her Mon. You got a nickname on the girl you bought. Everybody calls me Mon except him. Mon? Except him. Mon. Yeah, just Mon. M-O-N. All right. What's your last name? He goes, what does he call you? The answer to that? Once. We'll call her once. That's it. Next one's coming with a fist. The last girl didn't come. She has to have her shirt specially made. Remember that movie? What's your maiden last name? Fabarro. Fabarro? Yeah. And now your name is? Michelson. Michelson. That's not that Jewish, is it? Not really. Jewishy. Jewishy. Jewishy. Jewishy. But I was talking to them earlier. They're not. He. This isn't your main job. Nope. You bought this for her to have some fun during the day. She's to get out of the house, man. Hey, do something. I haven't seen her in two years. No, I'm a CPA. This is an investment we made. I used to go to this deli every week. It was my place. But do you walk in on the weekends with your balls out and clean that up? What's going on over there? No, complete opposite. I have to take that role. Oh, you do? Hey, Monica, tell your family they didn't clean this place good overnight. And tell the rest of them to finish building my deck. He wouldn't have a home to come to Monica, we can't have all 15 of them Living in the basement They're all cooking at once, it's hot Honey, we don't need the extra money From the sweatshop in the basement Are these fake Nikes? Oh dude, that'd be great Just a fucking deli, CPA Sombrero factory in the basement novelty sombreros that come with mustaches. You're a triple threat, Jeff. That's right. What does that mean, he's a triple threat? He's also an author. Oh, you wrote a book. I did write a book. That's funny because I wrote a book too. We're fellow authors. We are fellow authors. It's something to be proud of. I did not use AI. I didn't use AI. There was no AI when you wrote it. You could read my book and find misspelled words. Me too. In the chapters that I wrote. Really? His too. Really? You didn't edit it? We did. Who edited it? Monica? It's versus its. I don't know if this is the right word. Hey, tell your abuel to read this. Let me know if the words are spelled wrong. Abuel. There is some Portuguese in it, which I needed her help for. Ah, tuta ben. Do you speak Portuguese, too? No, I understand something. Oh, okay. No, I really don't. Fluent Spanish, though. Yes. Fluent, because I've been doing Duolingo for 317 days. Ooh, how's it going for you? Si. It's going yes? Si, yes, it's going yes. Estás. Muy bien. Me alegro. What'd you call me? You heard her. It was a hard R. Lou, I am so sorry. This is February, ma'am. Oh, my God. They just come... She called you the black, El Negro. Because they think they have a little brown, they can get away with it. It's not, okay? Ooh, do I have a little brown? You think I have a little brown? He does. That's a compliment. I don't think it's all that pale. I don't know if it's like Fat Joe Brown, where you can say the N-word freely, but I don't know. Give it a shot. This is the show. I think this is the show where you give it a shot. Yeah. Plug your deli first and your book and then give it a shot. See you later. It's really going to drive deli business, I think. It will for certain people. Jews show up for a while. Especially now. Let me ask you a question. Your book, what is it about? Oh, man. So, do you ever see The Purge? Yeah. Remember that movie where they give you one day a year to commit a crime? Yeah. So, this is not that. but it involves the government giving you one day a year to go into a simulation and lead whatever life you want to lead. Right. For what feels like up to a year. And you went to South America and got a girl. Close. Really? Wow. There is a story about Brazil in it, but it basically just tells the story about the development of this program and kind of this group of friends that do their simulations on the same day. Yeah. So it's kind of like five different stories that are based on my life. Right. It was fun to write. I don't know if I'd do it again. So is it the simulations of these things that you wanted to happen or have had? Oh, this is getting crazy. The way you want it to go? Can you shut Monica's headphones off, please, real quick? Yeah, Monica's going to be like, when the hell did you beat up seven guys? No, no, I wanted to. You're in a whorehouse in Brazil? It's close. So to answer your question, yes. There's a story about tornado chasing, hockey playing, going on a Lewis and Clark expedition, and going to Brazil. Really? Those are all things I would love to do. You would love to do one of them? I bet you did. No comment. Okay. It's not the old tornado chasing if you catch my drift. I don't catch your drift. What do you mean? It's not the old. What are you saying? I don't get it. You're not supposed to, mon. Yo, mon. Yo, mon. How you doing? Hey, so did you really want a tornado chase? I did. Really? I went to Penn State for meteorology. Really? You were going to be a weatherman? I was going to be a weatherman. So you're gay. Don't tell anybody. Well, actually, one time. People don't know that, that most weathermen are gay, right? You can say it now. I'm not saying a word. You can say it. Not the women, though. A lot of people say the tornado is God's dreidel. Let's try him. I don't know if it's a lot of people. It may have just been me making that up right now. But as a Jew, I can say it. Black Blue, watch him. Don't say dreidel. You know Voss is going to get that tattoo. of a tornado that looks like a dreidel going over Palestine. Oh, my God. Sorry. Sorry. Free Palestine, fuck ice. God bless America. Give the land back. Go birds. No. Go birds. I don't say that. Free Palestine. I don't say that. Not this week. Not this week. They're not playing this week. You can't say this week of all weeks. They're playing this week. I'll say it next week. No, the Eagles aren't playing this week. You can say go birds. Yeah, but the Patriots are playing this week. I don't say anything about the Patriots. Yeah. Do you want to make a bet, by the way? Want to make a bet that they win the Super Bowl? Right, yeah. If you could right now name seven players on a team, I'll bet you $3 million. Ronnie Zip, Michael Cha-Cha-Chao. You know what, dude? Ronnie Zip, I accept it. Cha-Chao-Chaos where you lost me. If you're going to come up with fucking seven, you only need six. You got Drake May. I know you know him now. I got Drake May. Booty, booty. Oh, dude, that would have been so great. You would have got me. Pachow Chow for sure definitely wasn't a person I was thinking of the Key Appeals sketch Quantavious Quantavious Quantavious Bus, train, airplane So you went to Penn State And that's why you wanted to chase tornadoes? I did Anything to get away from that molesting coach Am I right? So I was there when he was there I did see him walking through the locker rooms. Really? He paid you no mind? Paid me no mind. Wow. I'm sorry. I wasn't as fit back then. Man, that must have sucked. To find out everyone got invited to the party but you. But that motivated you to get in gay shape. That's right. You're like perfect gay shape. Dude, he's not wrong. Jerry Sandusky would fuck the shit out of you right now. Oh, dude. You'd get fucked. He'd probably actually kiss you. No comment. Probably. Can you give me that tissue right now? I'm a little excited. Thanks. Oh, there you go. Pastrami and gay sex gets me hot. Yeah, something about those two things do work for you. It's like oysters and wine for some people. So why wouldn't you go? Why can't you go tornado? Mon, she's... I don't want you to go because we have to get the pastrami. I'm sorry. Tornado killed Superman's dad. That's right. Yeah. Didn't have to because he could have saved him. But Kevin Costin went, no. Do you guys have any superhero kids? Because maybe yours would be less stupid than the actual Superman who wouldn't go save his father from a tornado that was coming. Yeah. He would have been there and back. No one would have seen it. He could have done it with nobody seeing it. Or I believe also had a little fair amount of time to maybe just go try to get him out with his human stuff. Yeah. The tornado wasn't on top of them. He had time to get the dog loose, get the girl out, and then just go, nah, I don't think I'm going to make it. No. This show is where I realized it's not just me because that scene infuriated me. Buddy, it made me... I checked out in the movie theater. It was so bad. I started just talking to the dude. I was Rob Mayhew. I saw that with him. I was so angry. I was like, is this real? Wait a minute. He's the angriest. He is the angriest. He's the angriest comic. He could have just went old school and just spun around the world until it went backwards in time. And then the tornado would have been like, you know, maybe 20 miles away. I know. And then went, dad, Unnecessary, for sure. Yeah, they had to reel the story up somehow. Stupid. It's so dumb. It's so dumb, too. It's things like that that make Monica not let Jeff go out and do his fucking tornado hunting. Yeah, so you're saying- It's a stupid Superman movie. It ruined a lot more than people think. You're saying that the dad was like, hey, I'd rather people not know that you're Superman and grow up without a dad Yeah Stupid It so stupid Stupid He could have gotten away with nobody would have noticed Nobody was was looking at the tornado They were looking at the tornado I can be in part two I have to play John Dutton My rate is too high in part two. It's a little cold out here for me. I want to get to a ranch. I do do a good Kevin Costner. I do that in my apartment. I'll just do the... Damn, dude. I'd prefer you killed hookers. I'd prefer you just killed hookers in your downtime. We find out years later from now. Then just practice Kevin Costner things to yourself. Well, I just told, for the radio listeners, I just told Kal-El not to save me with hand gestures. Yeah. Actually, let me see it again. Hang on. Wait for the music. Go. No. He was like, Dad, I could probably just get over there. Just with a regular jog, a light jog. Hey, Dad, everybody's up under the bridge. They can't even see me do this. Okay. All right. Cool. I love you, man. Oh, you're not my real dad. I'm going to peacefully blow away in a tornado now. Bye. Bye. And they never have somebody in a tornado in a real thing. You know what I mean? No, it just covers him up. No, he just disappears. He vanishes. I want to see a car door just take his head off. Am I remembering correctly that the new Superman story they're telling is that he was sent here to destroy Earth and take over and be their mean god? I heard. I was so offended. I didn't see it. Yeah, well... Jarrell's evil or something. No, no, no, no. They sent... He had only a snippet of what the parents said, and he lived his whole life. I nailed it. Can I say something? No, he's still holding onto the car. The tornado's not close enough that his hair's whipping around. Well, wait a minute. Jay, if they whipped around, it's a wig. That would fly right off. My point is, it's been windier in New York this week than what's happening here. His collar isn't flipping up. Just go now. Go now. This is the most peaceful tornado deathfall. Wait a minute. Go back. Rewind. Superman could have gone, made a scarecrow, flown it in, picked up Kevin Costner, got him out of there, and replaced it with a scarecrow before anybody saw. He could bring Kevin Costner to Costa Rica. Right now. Right now. Right now. Now. Now. Now he's just gone. Now it's too late. And I'll be honest with you. It's still not too late. Because now, all right, you have to use Superman powers. Yeah. All right. so the local hillbillies have Superman powers. I'd say save your dad and just fucking heat vision the rest of those people dead. It's not. You can't do that. You can't kill everybody. That's a different superhero. No. Just those one, no witnesses. Yeah, but you know what? Then people might know a secret no one cares about. Hey, Clark Kent's Superman. Who's Clark Kent? He's a writer for a newspaper. Oh, okay. Yeah, whatever. Why do you have to hide that so much? This is what sucks, too, is all the new... The Superman thing where they don't know it's Superman is the most annoying part of Superman. That he just puts a pair of goofy glasses on. No, they try to explain that, too. How? The new one did a thing where it's like the glasses do something. Like, the people aren't seeing what we see. What? Idea, I think. What? Like, he looks different to people. There's something about it. There's an actual thing with those glasses. There's like magic? I'm thinking the new one, right? There's magic? Christine, back me up. Monica would back him up. I'm looking it up. I gotta go find a chick in another country. Oh, yeah, hit no glasses. I gotta bring a girl back from another country so she can appreciate the American fineries that I bring. No, these California bitches just are entitled. Monica's like, I'm so glad for heat. Yeah, she can't believe it. Indoor plumbing? Yeah. She has to share a bed with a fucking goat or something? Yeah, she's so excited. All these things look different. Every once in a while he has to bring a goat in because she can't sleep. I cannot sleep. Wake up, kids. Meet all the night soccer practice. Hypnoglasses made from Kryptonian materials. See what I mean? Her alarm clock is... His face appears different, specifically blockier or frail. Whatever. That's horse shit. It's a bad explanation to just do quick. It goes, oh, the glasses are hypnoglasses. No, I have a spaceship, but I have metaglasses that make people fuck off. stupid I've got screwy vision and if the glasses were from Krypton they'd have an S on them that's right yeah everything there one thing about Krypton heavy branding very heavy although for some reason the branding seems wrong because it's an S versus a K yeah but that means hope that means hope doesn't mean super they explain that too it means superman no in the new superman in the old one in the new superman no the one the one before this it's not an S it means hope where I'm from Bobby, you accept everything that is told to you. That was earlier today in this pho argument. Call it pho all you want. It's spelled pho, unfortunately. And that is an S. And an S has never meant hope in anything. It means... Or super man, if it's on the chest of a guy named Superman. It means hope at Krypton. An S is a different thing. Well, wow, wow. What a super convenient thing. That the symbol for hope also is the first letter of the name of the person. Superman. No, Lois named him Superman because of the S, and he was like, hey, bitch, you're wrong. It means hope. Just to let you know, FYI, where I'm from, it's hope. You can call me Superman whenever you want. I don't give a shit, because I'm going to fuck the shit out of you anyways. But, I mean, right there. Listen, here you go. That's the oldest thing I remember seeing in a Playboy magazine when I was a kid, like the cartoon that was in the back of the center of the wall was a picture of Superman like talking to a, I think he's like talking to a cop and it's like a woman in bed and like the top of her head is like blown off from like, it was like his cum just shot through the top of her head. Yeah, here you go. It is though. No, it's not. Hang on. It's going to explain it in Krypton terms. It is though. It's not. Listen. Yes. You'll hear it to Ness. Yep. Yeah, you're her, I'm Superman. Nope. That's not an analogy. Yeah, in this world. Yeah? Yeah, you're like, in this world. Well, then hold my hand and fly me around the city. I can't. I have kryptonite in my pocket. You're Superman, and I'm fucking stupid Lois Lane, I guess. Pastrami is my kryptonite. I can't fly right now for the next hour and a half. I'm not abiding by this, Superman. I've jumped on to the newer, even lesser-known actor Superman they keep doing. I mean, they really do. You know who they should give it to who originally wanted it? Nicolas Cage. He did all the stuff, all the test screenings. He was going to be the long-haired, cool Superman. He was going to fight the giant spider. Yeah. I saw a thing that the giant spider he was supposed to fight in that movie they were going to use is what got repurposed. And I guess I never saw this movie, but there's a giant spider in Wild Wild West. I saw it. and that was supposed to be the bad thing. That was the villain in the Superman movie. Dude, that would have sucked. It was steampunk. It was like the legs would move and you'd... Well, maybe it was different when it was on Krypton. They're going to use steampunk? Wasn't Kevin Smith supposed to direct it too? That was a good one. Give it up. I didn't hear what he said. That's what the S stands for. Steampunk. Steampunk. That'd be funny. Can I ask Jeff a question? Of course. Jeff, you could have picked any show. Your thoughts on Gaza? That's my second question. Let me have a sandwich first. What do you think about Billie Eilish? Was she right or wrong? Quick go. Who's Billie Eilish? All right. Good answer. What do you think? Trump third term? Go. He's already in his third term. All right. Dave Smith, funny or not? Go. Not funny. What? No. I didn't mean you to answer it. He's hilarious. It's fucking... Jesus Christ. That was terrible. I want to put a pickle in my mouth. Put a pickle in your mouth, Bobby. Jeff. sour. What does that mean? I don't know. It just is, though. I don't know Jew terms. What does that mean? It's the more delicious of the two, I would always say. It's more acidic. Yeah. The other one's closer to a cucumber. That's what Dave Smith says about Jewish people. Closer to cucumbers? A little more acidic. Oh. I thought you were saying closer to cucumbers. Are they? That is really good. Good pickle? Crunch it on the microphone. Bobby, Jacob loves this. Yeah. Bobby, let me ask you a question real quick. Bobby, there's a lot of questions? probably a couple quick questions for you real quick well Jeff you could have gone you could have picked Sam you could have picked Ron Bennington you could have picked oh god that's all the shows Eddie Trunk why us explain why we're the best I hate Jacob's 1968 interviewing Dick Cavett skills you want to smoke a cigarette while you do this I want to hear some Talk to me Why did we beat out Everyone in your eyes It wasn't me It was Monica So she got this As a holiday present For me Really We were in the car Yeah Chris McCut We were in the car Listening to radio The charity buzz thing Came on She's like Oh this is pretty cool What shows do you listen to I'm like Sam Roberts And the Bopfire I don't know if you know Sam Roberts Yeah we do The Samoan guy I met him when he was An intern for OB and EM And he slowly Took down the whole Channel until it was his. His whole, it's like Game of Thrones. If you go back. He goes, the guy who won coming into Sam Roberts show under Maserati dealership gave everybody Maseratis. Sandwiches are good though. Yeah, exactly. I like sandwiches. I like sandwiches more like Maseratis. I love a potato pancake. Thanks for bringing the applesauce. Where's the sour cream? I brought it. Oh, you did. You're awesome. Somebody did spend like a gazillion dollars on Sam. Hey, do you know that, really, did they? What was he up to? I don't remember. It was up there. Like what? $4,500. $4,500. It must be. $4,500. I think it was $45,000. That's not a lot. Can't afford that. All right. It's not a lot. Guy's only got three jobs. You know what? I bet it was Opie. If I was Opie, I would have paid it all, and I get to come in studio. I like to think there's some shenanigans going on there. What do you mean? Dun, dun. I just feel like we're the best. I like that. I like that confidence. I like that too. Why don't you say it again? So Sam's flim-flamming over there a little bit. Pulling a little flim-flam move, you think? You think he padded somebody's money to get in there? I'm not saying anything. You think he called the Vince McMahon and said, hey, I got photos. I think it has something to do with WWE. Ooh. You think Triple H dropped it down? He's got connections there. He's got a lot. They got some cash there. He's got two universes. He lives in the Sirius XM and he's got the WWE. And he is way more famous than the WWE. We'll get to the bottom of this. What a Ray Mysterio we have in front of us. You see what I did there? He's a wrestler. Yeah. And his name's Mysterio. If we find something aloof, he'll get a smackdown. Ooh. I'll hit his ass raw. Ooh. I like that. What? Sorry. Sorry, baby. That took a weird change. It's getting a little weird. I'm going to lick his ass. I think Bobby just threatened to have sex with the person who got Sam Roberts. Oh, I've wanted to have sex with Sam a long time ago. Not now. Young Sam with the afro when he looked like some type of anime. Got to be able to grab on something. As you collapse chest on his back and the top of your head's like a fucking baby's ass. I guarantee he has some weird third nipple somewhere. Find it. Maybe I did. Hey, there's only one way to know, dude. Got to find that shit. Hey, you realize that you could have just brought this food in and came on the show, right? Is that an open invitation? and I'll bring food in here all the time. It'd be funny if he's here every week. I mean, you're bringing a sandwich spread. It'd be hard to say. You can't come in. No, I mean, you got that. Drop it off. Jacob's like, guys, come on in. The only way we keep Jacob smiling is food. No, I'm going to use this. Like I said, this is good for me because I'm out there. If I do a football party or something. Is it near you? Morristown. It's not far enough. I have a couple of clients in Wayne, so we do go to Wayne. You deliver? Mm-hmm. What about a little Katona? No. We'll go up there. I can't believe we don't have... Can you deliver across... I think it's illegal to bring this across international or state lines. International. Yeah, don't take this to Canada. Don't go to Canada. You definitely can't take it to Canada. We'll take it to Canada. Unless you're Rich Voss. That's true. No, we were talking earlier. They have nothing in Katona like this. They don't have any... They have no nothing. Oh, no Jews. We have Ryan Reynolds. It's all Jews. That's not what you told me. Oh, maybe. You said it's all Ryan Reynolds types. Yeah, which is the elite white. Yeah, the Ryan Gooselings. And what's her name, the lady we interviewed from? Martha Stewart. Edie Falco. Edie Falco. Yeah, you're right. I guess there is a few Jews, not a lot. Not a lot. Damn, that's Ardsley. Ardsley has a lot of Jews. Ardsley, a lot of Jews. And they do have a place there. I get it now. Where there's a deli, there's the Jews. Where's there a potato pancake? Bobby, you're a movie nerd. Am I? Yeah. Okay. Is this a fair statement? We were watching a little thing yesterday about Goodfellas, like 15 facts you know about Goodfellas. Yeah. And Christine said, oh, Goodfellas. It's so funny, I'm not in the mafia movies. Neither am I, really. But that's one of my favorite movies. It was so good. I go, yeah, that and Casino. And my assessment would be, I think Casino's better. It's more fun to watch, but Goodfellas is a better movie. I don't know. Casino's a more fun flick. There's more fun in that movie. Yeah, I mean I would say so. I think Casino is, if Goodfellas was A, Casino's a B. B? A minus. It's maybe an A. Okay, an A minus. But there's something missing in Casino that Goodfellas had story-wise. Ray Liotta. It just the story was just so much better It went from when they were younger all the way to the end Casino was Debbie Mazar weird little boy body It was weird And Joe Pesci in that too like hooking up with I just didn't buy it, you know what I mean? Hooking up with Sharon Stone. She was a junkie whore. Yeah. Yeah, but- A hot one. Just hot. Not at that point. Not when she was sucking his dick. She had that fucking little mom bouffant hair. She was smoking hot. She did it for me. Really? when she was all, no, no, when she was young for sure, when she became James Woods' coke whore who sucked off Joe Pesci, she was a mess. There was only, I think, one or two good murder scenes in that. What? There was the one with the pen at the beginning, which was awesome, when the guy, hey, is this, excuse me, is this your pen? He's like, yeah, fuck, and I told De Niro to beat it, and then Pesci just came over and took the pen and stuck it in the guy's neck. Yeah. Which I would love for you to do. Squeeze the guy's eyeball out in that one. If Jacob ever disrespects me again on air, I would like you to do that to him. Take him out with a pen. What the fuck kind of people you fucking disrespect my fucking bear bear? That's pretty good. I know, you know. That was pretty good. I'll tell you one of the facts. That was really good. I'll tell you the facts. I was impressed. What the fuck, Monica? Show your face right when I'm talking. This is men. I'll tell you what I didn't like. I was in character. That was good. That's different. No, it's different. That really is just the character. This fucking broad. Spruce brother. Yap, yap, yap. this fucking guy. You know what I mean? Grab her by the fucking elbow, tell her to shut the fuck up and fucking kick her out of the fucking studio. Yeah, you make a good empanada, but that's about it, you fucking motherfucking. Christine, what the fuck are you looking at? Take care of your hoe. You got a little chip monkey at that end. Yeah, I did. I did. Christmas, Christmas time is here. Well then. Marshmallow. Marshmallow. I did fall out of character because I went too long and I hit it and then I went a couple more. It's kind of like my set this weekend in Denver. Joe Pesci, what I didn't like in those 15 things you didn't know, was like he wanted to do a lot of improv-ing in the movie so he can bring his personal mafia experience to the movie. Like, shut up. Personal mafia experience. No, he wasn't in the mob, but he was mob adjacent. Absolutely. Yeah. Hang on one second. I don't know that for a fact I've always just wanted to say... Adjacent. Adjacent. I believe it. sentence and by the way it was good thanks you used it right i don't think it's true though i think you can look that up christine hurry hurry the fuck up uh i was heard they they did not improv improvise on that movie they stuck to the script aside from maybe one scene i'm pretty sure pesci could improvise no they said uh this thing said that uh and you could see it in the background like the actual actors they said you could see when he's doing the funny how the funny how scene Look what it says It says it Mob adjacent Dude was upbringing And personal connections Which 11 But that's like You lived in the neighborhood No no There's There's There's people There's people Who are close to that I mean when I worked At an Italian restaurant I'm in the mob And home alone I knew a lot There was a lot of guys That would come in That I would have to wait on Where I'd get a little pep talk Before I waited on that table Let me tell you So you just got out of bed You know Make sure you Don't be All right You know what I mean And there was a lot of Joe the Barber. That's a difficult table to take. You know what I mean? There was a lot of mob adjacent. Not that I was, but the people that worked there were. So that's a thing. I'm in the mafia, and I'm also in that Harvard movie with fucking Brendan Fraser. The worst performance of him. When he gave the speech at the end, it was like a weird Joe Pesci, but he was pronouncing his ors or something. It was like Smart Joe Pesci. What movie is that? Honors. With honors. With honors. He's dying. His speech in that fucking sucks. You never saw it with honors, dude? No. What, you don't want to see a mob adjacent homeless guy on Harvard, but he's actually a genius? But he pronounces his words so he sounds smarter. He's a homeless guy. But he pronounces his words. Yeah. And it's just Joe Pesci pronouncing the word, like over-pronouncing it. They cleaned him up. They got him all together. And then he killed again. That brand of Frazier's real hair? At the time. At the time, he had hair. He'd always look like he had mange. And McSteamy. Oh, this right here. McSteamy. Brandon Frazier was a hottie to toddy. Remember? Hell, yeah. Oh, when he had those little doll eyes? Yeah. School ties? Hell, yeah. School ties. I watched that as a kid. That was a great movie. And that's when you said you were going to get yourself a tough Jew? I walked into that one. I walked into that one. I mean, right in the face. I did. Wow. Probably. I mean, one of the funniest things. I find my tough Jew one day. That was the funniest thing I've heard in three months. Your timing, your cadence, your patience, your tone. That was really good. This is the... Happy music? End of the three-minute little lady. This is when they're all walking down the street and they all turn back and it freezes on them happy. Something like that. I miss those days. I miss movies when you didn't have to think. Oh, I thought you meant when guys can sing gay and it wasn't considered gay yet. I miss when it was all white guys in a movie. This is a guy? Oh, my God. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say that. I'm glad that Spanish people are in movies now. I don't believe you. I'm glad that Spanish people are in the movies now. As long as they don't win awards. They're taking over music. They're taking over my American Super Bowl halftime. Now I've got to watch Kid Rock and fucking Dierks Bentley or whoever the fuck's doing this. It's always going to be Kid Rock, of course. It's a Kid Rock fucking boom-toon-tootin', rootin' tootin' fucking halftime show. They're doing a side halftime show. Yeah. Right? Yeah, for the... Why can't I never remember the name of this company? Turning Point USA. Turning Point USA. It's your boy. Was. Who? Was. Charlie Kirk? No, no, no. Oh, yeah. I thought you were talking about that. No. Who's my boy? Kid Rock. Joe Rogan? Kid Rock. No, I said Kid Rock. So it was a show. Yeah. Yeah, he's the only name I knew on there, really. And it's a cult something. and they keep showing a bunch of country artists. The people that want you to really be upset about it, too, really do. They put pictures of them up as a Kid Rock. It's like, me. Good family fun. I'm going to get fucking Kid Rock. I mean, I don't know. Just watch the dumb Super Bowl halftime. Who gives a shit? Well, just watch both eventually. It's all that's going to happen. Why would I not watch the best? I don't know. Are you going to go over to Kid Rock, or are you going to stay at the Super Bowl? I don't even know how to go over to the Kid Rock thing. Is that on my laptop or my phone? No, you have to say three al-fathers and two ham-erries. Oh, okay. And it just appears on your screen. Okay, okay. Sorry. And one amotie. Yeah. You do know Jewish culture. I had a Jewish foster father for three years. That's right. Yeah, that's right. Amotie lech. Do the amotie. How's it go? Amotie lech. Mingah horetz. But how's it go? How's the whole thing? Baruch ha-ta-do-nai. Baruch ha-ta-do-nai. Hello, hey, no, melech ha-lam. A-share. A-share. A-share. A-share. It's so tough. I only know it stops when it gets to my Jewish name. Can you do the Goyim version, not the long version? Oh, my mom would be so happy right now. I only know it's up to my name. Asher. Asher what? That's my Jewish Hebrew name. Pastrami. Pastrami. The All-American Halftime Show. It's going to be on this? Is it free? It's on YouTube. Yeah, it's going to be free. Oh, thank God. It says celebrating faith, family what? Faith, family, and freedom. Oh, fuck. Three Fs. Do you think this is going to be... Who's going to be more entertaining? Bunny? All it would take for me, though, is if you just add celebrating faith, family, freedom, and go birds, I'd watch. I'd watch that first. What do you think is going to be more entertaining? This one or the... Entertaining? Bad Bunny. Bad Bunny. Bad Bunny, right? Entertaining. Musically, because I just like Kid Rock more than Bad Bunny. I don't know anything about Bad Bunny. Musically, it's pretty terrible to me. If I was Bad Bunny, I would just go... I would just double down, come out in a sundress, and just make out with dudes. Is he performing in a dress? There was a rumor going around that he's going to wear a dress. Just wear a dress and just make out with every dude on stage. The son of a bitch, he's got a fantastic personality. He really does. For a guy whose music I don't know or I don't care about it at all. If they play it, I'm like, this is never going to be my thing. But he is so likable. SNL, man. That show really will humanize a person, though, He made fun of himself doing the Super Bowl and people being mad about it. He just seems like a good-spirited guy. That Justin Timberlake thing, the same thing where you're like, God damn it, you want to hate Justin Timberlake. And you're like, son of a bitch is charming and funny. The bit they did on SNL on the Grammys with him was pretty funny with Trevor Noah and him. That was all right. I thought it was going to bomb, and then they saved it. You know what I mean? Where he kept saying he couldn't perform? Yeah. That thing? Yeah. He was cool. He's a cool guy. Good-looking guy, too. Good-looking enough to pull off that horrible, I don't know, what that fucking dumb hair is. His hair is horrific. He's wearing a Gilligan's Island hat. Throw it longer or cut it shorter, but whatever's happening right now, I don't appreciate. Oh, he's wearing Jacques Maris. Is he now? Ah, come on. Oh, dude. That's sexy as shit. I think it's a thank yous. Monica's slipping off a chair right now. So am I. You know, I didn't like him at first, but the new album or the one that is the most popular, I actually listened to it in the car, and it's pretty good for me. Like, what I liked in terms of the music and the drums and the actual real music. Now, when you hear it and you translate in your head, are you hearing it? He goes, I like a girl who is pretty. You translate it actually like the way it's said. I like the girl who is white. I like the guy all the night. She will get in my car that is black. He's gay, right, or bisexual? Huh? I think he's gay. Wasn't he dating that really pretty Kardashian girl? Is he gay? I know Jenner. Am I crazy? I thought he was gay. I've never heard a word about him being gay or bisexual. Oh, that was just my thoughts. That was your hopes. It's just white guys think sexy's gay. Guys, I'm drunk on pickles. Sorry, there's a lot of acid in those. You went with the full sours. I told you to slow down. I told you you were going to fuck up. I thought he was gay. You wanted him to be gay. Oh, because he... Because of the dress. People are calling him gay because he was in a dress. Which I would love to be able to wear dresses in the summer. He performed in a dress? I think so. I think he was just trying to prove a point. Like, who cares if you wear a dress or not? I don't... Your father? Your Spanish father? Who's like, you know my son no more. Any black person you meet? I'm convinced that guy, Harry Styles, he dresses in a dress now because I think he just- Yes, but he doesn't know any black people. He gives himself a handicap. He doesn't know any black people. No black people. He dates really pretty girls, too. That's what I'm saying. I just think- And those girls don't know any black people either. I think he just said, I'm going to try and see if this puts a dent in- Can I hear a little bit of this? Is he wearing brown face? Because I'll tell you this right now. I'm not okay with that. He may have just fucked up with me halftime. Yeah, there we go. Kid Rock, halftime. Yeah, football. Fucking America. America. Does he wear a MAGA hat? I hope so. I tell you what, I love that they busted all Nashville on Broadway. Fucking Aisha's busted and started arresting all the illegals at worst at Kid Rock's fucking bar. Did they? Yes. I think he gave a heads up. Didn't he get shit? For his worker, he gave a heads up, but I think some of them got out of there. They were coming. I didn't know that. He sold his own, or didn't sell his own, he sold his own belief system out by getting his Mexican people and going, get out of here, they're coming. We really need to slow down, because I don't want to be eating shitty food cooked by white kids. Oh my God. You know what I mean? Not give a shit white teenagers. I don't want some Italian guy to have to get his old nana out of the kitchen. I don't want to go back. I'm all the hell out there. When you were younger, you could see this happen. And I remember a girl who we knew, family pizzeria in the area, Italian family. The food was so good when they opened up. But I knew the girl who was going to one day, it would be all hers. And you're like, this is not the place. It doesn't even exist anymore, that place. It's not even there anymore. So the parents were like, we leave this to you. I go, she's not going to be the one to do it. That's that dad getting up every day and brick ovening pizza or whatever. The daughter was always there reluctantly It wasn't like she knew how to make a great stromboli Who's it? Brantley Gilbert Don't know who that is I want to know who these other people are Who are very willing to do it Country Why wouldn't What's Her Face do it? Who? Lainey Wilson She ain't fats no more Is that Snyder's daughter? Who's Lainey Wilson? Lainey Wilson was the one that was on Yellowstone Oh yeah with the big dumper Not anymore She's bony thin I don't like it I don't like it either I don't think she looks better. I think she actually looks worse. Remember there were, do you remember there was giant pictures of her? Like fathead, what are they called? The fatheads? Fatheads. That were all over the wall. The Airbnb we had in Nashville. Yeah. It was like Lainey Wilson fatheads all over the wall. It was a real choice. And then every record player had like a Lainey Wilson record like set on it. It was always like, are you trying to make sure I like Lainey Wilson? That was a great Airbnb. That was a good Airbnb. actually. Is this her song? Let me hear it. Is this her? It's a guy. The guy Brantley Gilbert. Okay. I have no idea who that is. Yeah, this is not going to be that exciting. This is not the song that's going to really hit. Maybe. Maybe that part. It really has. Country, though, has gone to a good level of the tatted up, whatchamacallit now. But here's the thing. This guy has a tattoo. He's got a lot of tattoos. He's muscular and he's all tied up in a bunch of chains. A mohawk. Just because you can't get one. Bobby, it's a grift. We've talked about it. Country music is too easy to do. I promise you, me and you, combined talents. We can make country songs that would chart This has been done by comics before This has been done by come remember Jessica Michelle Singleton you know her Jessica is a car you know Jessica It's already it's always legally adopted daughter. I only keep five comics in my head at a time We know that Ari adopted a girl who are you? I'm Jay. Oh, yeah, okay Ari adopted a girl he what he adopted a girl years ago. I didn't know Jessica Michelle Singleton. That's his daughter That's his actual daughter. Fuck you guys telling me right now 100% true. No. On my life. Yes. What? Why did she need adopting? She didn't. They just did it. This is a bit. I get it. What the fuck is wrong with him? I was going to marry Louis, but I was still married. You're not now. I would- Get it done. Strong chance you can talk me into marrying Louis. I'd rather talk you into marrying Christine first. That's not as funny. I know. It is to us. It's kind of funny this whole time. Yeah, well, it would be funny to everybody else. We'd all be like, he fucking married her. What a dumbass. Nobody thought that was going to happen. That's crazy. But Jessica charted in country music because she just said, I'll do a country song. Can I hear it? Sure. I'd love to hear it. Is it good? Is any of it? I love country. You know that. You don't, though. I hate when you do that to me. What? When you say you don't. Well, you're trying to. I don't like when you talk. You talk like the voice in my head. I know. And I don't like it. I am the voice in your head. You're trying to become a thing, and country music's part of it to you. He goes, Bobby's like, well, I want to listen to the music that makes sense to go with my brand new wool denim, wool on the inside, denim on the outside jacket, my work gloves, and the logs that I'm going to move around. You want to do man stuff. When I go up country, I become country. In the summer, I'm country. And from September until April, I'm disco. Do you mean like Beyonce country? No, that's not country. No, it is what he means. That is what he means, actually. No, it is not. Yes, it is. I'm talking, dude, I'm talking country. We're talking about old school outlaw country. I love Johnny Cash. That's not your one. You don't listen to Johnny Cash? Yes, I do. That's not what you're doing. I do listen to Johnny Cash. You're listening? No. Born and I am Sue. You're listening to Jelly Roll? I love Jelly Roll. I know. I like a couple of the songs. Well, you went from loving him to now liking a couple songs. I love him. I love, I love, you don't like his songs? Well, I don't like country music. I do. I listen to a few of his songs I love. That album he came out, I listened to the whole thing. Which one? The one with the church. Oh. Right? Yeah, sure. Who's this? This is the song. Yeah, Jessica. Now I need whiskey. Oh, she called herself normally wild, yeah. Is that what she named herself? I don't know if it's two. It says Jessica Michelle Singleton Times. Okay. Yeah. I'm hearing it. Generate by typing each line of the song into an AI video maker that's in beta. making sense to me good movie you got that truck yeah kick it up your country not a lot of jobs around Bobby we could do this we should do it This takes nothing. Let's do it. Yeah. But if we chart, who gives the speech at the Grammys? Here's what's underrepresented, okay? Lil Nas X turned the R&B wall upside down on its head with overt, aggressively gay activities on stage. Okay. Let's do that to country. Great. Perfect. You're going to have to change your look, though. Remember Tattoo? Remember all the things you said, all the things you said? Those two Russian girls that would just French kiss all the time when they were making music? We'll be there to country music. We never play the guitars. We almost play the guitars, and we start singing to each other, and then we just start putting the guitars behind our backs, and then we almost, and then by the end, we just start heavy Frenching, and then it starts pouring water on us. You can call it country without the O. Yes. Yes. I love that. Outlaw country. You're going to have to change your look, though. Why? Because they're going to think you're Jelly Roll. Oh, shit. Yep. They are going to think I'm Jelly Roll. Yeah, he got skinny, dude. Not enough face tattoos. Jelly Roll got skinny, man. You got the same teeth? No, no. The same torso? His teeth are crazy. I think he got 64 put in. Did he? Yeah, instead of 32. They doubled him up. Yeah, dude. His smile comes out of his mouth. He goes, I don't know, man. I don't know, man. It comes out. They ask him something. He goes, what do you think about all this war and stuff going on in politics? He's like, oh, man. I don't know, man. That's what he's supposed to say. That's smart. He's good. He don't throw his hat in any of that shit. I was thinking, was that talking to you the other day? I was saying, really impressive. Someone who has really never, through his whole career, got mixed up in any political shit in any way. Kev, Kevin Hart's really done a good job. He's never been mixed up in a political thing. She loves Kevin Hart. Yeah? I know. Want to smell my fingers? Nope, I don't. Oh, then here. But he was never mixed up in anything like that. No, just getting behind anybody or being at some, he's never like campaigned for someone or did any even commercial. He just never did it and always stayed like wildly famous. Yeah, he doesn't do, he doesn't go on podcasts and talk about shit like that. But he did the thing where he went from comedy to famous. And when you go, he went actor famous. And when you're actor famous, they kind of shut it down. No, I think they ask you fucking all that shit. They take it on me all the time. Yeah, but you just... I mean, think about the interviews from the movies and stuff. It's always like, oh, the movie and this, all that's horse shit. Yeah, but they try to get... I mean, now you watch, like, Schultz is like a comedy podcast. Now when it comes on, it comes on, breaking news. Donald Trump just says, well, it's like a news report. Yeah, we... Every walk on Andrew Schultz on Flagrant 2. Now this is breaking in here. Oh, my God, this is breaking in. More news breaking coming in. The CIA just released more Epstein. Yeah. It's like news. Yeah, somewhere along the line, we decided that what we think matters, and it stinks. And then Stavros' show is telling people that it sucks to be into politics while he talks about politics the other way. He's like, God, all these comics, they just love Trump and his stupid bullshit, but this is the other direction of it. How about you guys? You know the problem with all these podcasters that they don't have? They don't have a Puerto Rican friend who's willing to get into street fights while in those 40s talk about. That's what we need to talk about. Crazy things happen in the world that's fun and funny. Your Puerto Rican friend getting into a fist fight in the streets of Texas. I don't want to talk about fucking deep state politics. Fulfilling his destiny is what it was. Absolutely. Fulfilling his destiny. Putting street justice out there for everybody. He has to. Well, his father, as we all know, his father died in the beat at night fight. Supposedly. I think he's still alive. No, no, no. I think he's still alive and owns a comedy club in Arkansas. Confirmed that, dude. After the Beat at Night fight, Michael Jackson was only there for four minutes of that video, and eventually he leaves, and it's an unstable thing. It's a lot of times like when we invade a country and then leave it unstable. You know what I mean? He left the Beat at Night fight unstable. You think just because those guys came together in harmonic dance, as soon as you leave, they're not going to remember what they were fucking taped to wrist, strapped to each other, knife fighting to the death for? I blame Prince. Prince was supposed to be in that video, and it was too gay for him, so he backed out. If he had stayed, they would have just wound up having sex at the end. They probably just would have had sex, and Louis' father would still be alive. But then we wouldn't have his book. And we all know that's going to be a good shitter read. It's a great shitter read, especially the Ford. He goes, and that's when I kill my turtles. Oh, boy. Remember the chapter where he kills his turtles? I'm like, should you write about this? The best one was the rollerblading on 9-11 to get home to see his girlfriend. That's one of the greatest stories ever. He literally rollerblading from the dust of the building falling. No, it was when he said, he goes, Louis J. Gomez, the book we're talking about here, when he said, I was sitting there on 9-11 alone in a hotel room, so sad and distraught because my girlfriend had to go back to see her family. Tim Dillon was like, that's what you're distraught about? There's people being pulled out of rubble. But he did. He rollerbladed from Manhattan back over. To Rockland. To Rockland County. Over the George Washington Bridge. To get home. Remember the AI video somebody made of it? So funny. I didn't see it. Do you have that, Christine? The AI video? It's easy to find. It's Louis wearing mascara or he's wearing eyeliner. Oh, yeah. He's like, oh, I got to get out of here. Oh, God, 9-11. So good. It was on Sora. Oh, while she finds that also. So I know, happen to know that our crew, that's right, Jeff, Monica, it's a big day for you guys. You brought treats, but some treats were brought for you. Everybody, a couple of the crew brought some gifts for you guys that they'd like to present to you. Oh, is this it? Thank you. Here, look at this. That's not it either. That's pretty funny also. Yeah, there's the one where he's wearing that message. That's not even 9-11. Who would like to go first? That was the molasses disaster in Boston. Jacob would like to go first? Yeah, I'll go last. Yeah, Lou should go last. Where should Black Lugo? In the middle? What are you guys doing right now? They have presents. We appreciate what... Oh, okay. Because Jeff and Monica are fans of ours. We'd like to thank them back for coming in and giving us food. Thank you. That's so nice of you. Well, I had written it was just because Jeff was on the... Real quick. Just a while ago. Real quick. Before you give it to Monica, it's for Jeff. Go ahead. This is for Jeff, but it's for... Wow. Wow, that's shitty, dude. What does that say, Jeff? You don't like Spanish people, right? I love Spanish people. Jacob hates it. I like you more than Jeff. Jacob's family's in Florida, so he thinks there's too many. Jeff's kind of a dud on the mic. Listen, I'm kidding. Only in bed. Jeff, you're a champion like Joey, 22. Jacob. It's a picture of Joey Logano and me. And you. Wow. That's so cool. Thank you. You've got to frame that and put it in the shop. We definitely will. We will. If he comes by, absolutely. That's so cool. Behind the counter so nobody tries to steal it. That's so cool. Can I see it? I do have, for both of you, unfortunately, these are a Batat family. This is Canpain. It's a Batat brand. I don't know what that is. Well, they're heirlooms now. That's his last name. Yeah, that's all right. Sort of like you own the pastrami house. We own this. That's awesome. Oh, that's pretty cool. Those are antiques now, though. The company has been dissolved. These might be three years old, so I can't vouch for the flavor because they were in my desk. All right, look at the studio dirty. I think the company was dissolved because we had a fight on air about it. The company's still around. Is it? Yeah. Oh, shit. Sorry. Thank you. Campaign's delicious. And that's aged. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know if it ages well. No, no, no. Don't open that in here. Put it on ice. Yeah. And like I said, if it's off, it's because it was three years old. Hey, guys, here's possible botulism. But you can always just not open it. Oh, my God. That's very strong. Marcus, Jeff hit you. Cheers. She's like, she gets me. What are you talking about? Yeah, she? You like it. Fiery. Fiery Latina. That was very sweet of you, Jacob. Thank you. It was very nice of you. Thank you. I will definitely try it tonight. These are the mimosas, but I do have one of the last remaining cans of the, what's the one? The flavor that you liked. It's not your family company. It's been a while for me. I don't remember. There's peach, and there was the wine-flavored one. Sarsaparilla? Yeah, that one is like a bottle of wine in a can. That's all. Oh, that's really cool. You and Monica want to have a nice night. Nice. I'll give you one of those. Thank you. I'll give it to my 16-year-old. Nice and loose. Give it to your 16-year-old. Don't do that. That's awesome. They say it's the Zima of today. That's right. He's old enough to drink. There you go. Have you guys had this? No. My favorite is date rape raspberry. I'll have that one. That was the Epstein Island. That was the drink on Epstein. The Epstein Island Rose. Of course. Yes. Yes, Ray is. Yes. The tears of juveniles is the flavor of that one. Oh, boy. Black Lou, your gift? Yes, I have a wonderful gift for you guys. You taking them off your black hit list? Finally. Okay, that's the second one. You guys were dead. This is pajamas from one of our famous and legendary Christmas shows at the Village Underground. Jacob actually wore these when he was dealing with Shane Gillis on stage. We called him Shane to Claw. So there's actually, there might be some poo stains in the bone. He's very nervous. These exact pajamas. I'm going to try to sanitize them. Those are the ones that are adorable. Now, what's great about these, if they have a little butt flap, you can shit. That's where Shane would stick his hand in and squeeze his asshole during the show. In case you guys are into role play. You know, Christmas night role play. Thank you. What else are you doing on Christmas? Christmas. Yeah, you're just waiting to wake up and order Chinese food. I'm going to wear this to work tomorrow. I was cradled in those by Shane. Thank you so much. Absolutely. Enjoy, please. Thank you. I'm going to take a picture of myself in this and send it to you guys. Can you send it to me too? Sorry, Jeff. I'll send me your picture. Those pajamas have been touched by the man who headlined Madison Square Garden. That'd be so funny if these guys are just crazy swingers. Start sending us photos every day. One way to find out. I'll accept. In fact, guys, I'll accept them, and I won't even tell anybody else you're sending them to me. They'll be like, were those guys swingers? I'll be like, no. Why'd you hear that? Are these dinosaurs? Yes. My seven-year-old loves dinosaurs. So does Jacob. What's your favorite one? If your seven-year-old loves dinosaurs in Titanic, he might be able to date Jacob. It's so funny. Your seven-year-old is the same size as Jacob, which is perfect. She is big.