We Hosted an Anime Battle Tournament | Trash Taste #282

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Who would be the strongest in every scenario because I, you know, one of the biggest things that gets the internet's angry is who would which character would beat which character in the fights, you know, which, you know, disclaimer, the goat himself, Stan Lee once said, the person who is the strongest is the person that the author decides to be the strongest. You know, that is, that is words I live by, but I'm going to talk to the AI version of him. I'm going to ask him to read right there. Stan is this true? $15 a month to the service that's keeping that poor man alive. Yeah. God, can you, can you do the thing? Can you, can you say that? Can you, can you say? Oh yeah. I need. Oh my god. I like how you whispered it. As an OG, as an OG fan. I want to hear this again. It's been so many years since we heard. Let me dust off the fucking. Oh my god. OG gigofans. Listen up. You're about to get a head of nostalgia. Let me dye my gray hair for a second. Look, can I still do this? Tournament. Yeah. Yeah. God, it's been like, that's 10 years old now. That's the worst part about Barnaz. You didn't hear that? There was a tournament. Damn. But we have a bunch of anime characters who will be pitted up against each other. We will be arguing who the winner is. But we will, we thought we'd throw in a little bit of spice in it. So we decided from just having them fight to the death, they will have a category that will be randomized. So, and a stage that will be randomized as well. So it's not just who is the strongest. It is who is the most adaptable for every type of situation you can possibly think of. And it is a super fight scenario generator. If you don't know super fight is kind of basically like a card game that is, you know, based on these kinds of discussions, but it's not always about who is the strongest. Sometimes it's about, sometimes it could be anything. Otherwise, Saitama would win. And what? We'll discuss that when we get to it. All right. But for our first matchup, we have... We should also mention that we've only taken one character from each series and normally the most iconic. Like Muhammad Ali, Jr. Except for Bakke, because I wanted to include Muhammad Ali, Jr. Who gets his ass beat in every... We could honestly do a tournament arc just on Bakke characters. Well, we could have put Obama in this, we could have put Bush in this. But I wanted to include Muhammad Ali, Jr. Because bless him, he can't win a goddamn fight in that series. So the first matchup is Kenshin from Rony Kenshin versus Muhammad Ali, Jr. from Bakke. All right. And the category is the fastest at Bob's letting. Okay. Wait, I thought you were going to be fighting God. I didn't know this either. Okay. Well, you know, it's not, I guess it's no longer a death battle unless they just suck at Bob's letting. Unless whoever loses the Bob's let battle dies. Yeah. This is a Bob's let battle with their life. Like you just get shot with their life on the line. Ah, shit. Bob's let. These are like two characters. I cannot imagine on a Bob's let. Okay. Let's... Okay. So like before we get into that, let's just like establish if this was just a regular fight. Yeah. Who would win? Like a regular just like to the death. I don't know. I've never watched Rony Kenshin. Okay. But I just have to assume Muhammad Ali, Jr. would lose. Well, one fights with his fists and the other one has a fucking katana. So, you know, might be an easy W for Kenshin. I mean, I just figured he was going to lose to whoever he thought. Yeah. But in a Bob's let battle? Not sure, man. Kenshin doesn't even know what Bob's letting is. Exactly. When was skiing invented? When were I like... When were winter sports invented is what I was trying to say. I think, you know, 100 years ago. No, no, sorry. 150, 100. Oh, wow. 1200. Oh, shit. 150. I was kind of like competitive skiing or something. But yeah, I guess it's probably the sport. The oldest winter Olympic sport figure skating dates back to 1908. Okay. Okay. Well, look, Kenshin lives in Edo and there's no fucking snow there. And we assume not. So he'll probably look at snow and be like, what the fuck is this? There's no snow in Edo. I don't think so. There's a snow in Tokyo. Maybe like once a year. Yeah. I mean, it would have probably been a little bit. I feel like Kenshin has seen snow before. Literally, I think in a, wasn't his backstory or something. When he was like an assassin, didn't that take place in snow or something like that? Bro, I read Ronik Kenshin like 15 years back. I fucking remember. I don't think seeing snow or ice makes you a better bobsledder. I think it does. I think it does. Because I suck ass at snowboarding and I was not born in like snow. I've got a snowboarding guy on the bobsledder. All I have to do is just not fucking die. Yeah. But Kenshin might look at the bobsledder and be like, how do I, what do I do with this? You know what? I feel like Kenshin would have the advantage on this because it's all about balance, right? It's all about, it's all about balance and speed, right? And yeah, but that's exactly why I think Muhammad Ali Jr. would win because he's got that boxer in him. You know, it flows like a butterfly, stays like a bee, just like his dad, you know? There is no footwork you can do on the ice. Joey, you know, Kenshin, he's been through more different, more environments, more life or death situations. You know, he has. Don't make me the deciding vote. I just really want a situation where Muhammad Ali Jr. beats Kenshin. That's plain devil that is not happening, Joey. Man, I don't know. I don't know or feel strongly about Muhammad Ali Jr. What do you mean you wanted him to be in this tournament? But you know what? I'll vote Muhammad Ali Jr. Oh, don't do that. What, what, what reason? You got to give a reason. You got to give a reason. I just think it'd be really funny if you had to fight Saitama Aaron. Okay. I just think in terms of the whole balance thing, Muhammad Ali Jr. would have the better balance. Well, then we like he sucks in a fight, but he's got the boxing, right? You heard him, boss. Alright, alright. He's got the boxing finesse. Well, 2v1, 2v1. Alright, Muhammad Ali Jr. wins. Muhammad Ali Jr. wins the Bulbsled fight. Okay. That's crazy. He finally won a fight. I know. We got to give him a W somewhere. Alright, next up is Saitama versus Aaron. Okay. So, the category is the first to solve an escape room. The first to solve it. Well, I think you'd be Saitama, right? Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. He's dumb as bricks. He doesn't even know what kind of, he doesn't even know what kind of- Bro doesn't even know that he's premature balding. He'd be like, oh, I need to escape. Okay. I'll just punch a hole through the fucking wall. And I'm out. Surely would not count. I'm out. I don't need to do all this finessing. You should just bam, I'm out. Aaron would have gone in the- Okay, spoilers. Spoilers for this anime. Aaron would have gone in the future, already found the solution and solved it back in when he comes back. He would have asked his dad, hey, go here, solve it for me, come back and tell me what the fuck to do. Yeah. I mean, but Aaron also didn't know how to open up a fucking basement either. So, that's- Which version of Aaron are we talking about? Which version of Aaron are we talking about? Are we talking about Season-Final Season, Aaron? Are we talking about Season-Final Season, Aaron? Well, we could talk fucking pre-workout, Saitama, and he'd be bald and weak. Yeah, but he'd still do a better job than Aaron. Yeah. Like child, Aaron. I don't know about that. He's pretty fucking dumb. I don't know, man. Saitama was so fucking dumb in that show. Is Aaron smart, though? Kinda. I'm just smart on his respective series than Saitama shows. Saitama doesn't need to be smart, though. Yeah. That's exactly why he's never learned to be smart. He's never had to challenge himself because he gets to flick everything today. Yeah, that's why- I think the whole point of Saitama is that he is always, you know, he always comes out on top. He is the strongest without even trying, right? Yeah. Like- But, you know, he couldn't figure out that King was like lying to him the whole time. Pretty blatantly so. Well, Nork and the entire world for that matter. Yeah, but he was playing video games with him, bro. We should be able to see that. We should hold me. I think- Hmm. Let's pit this in a scenario, right? Okay. Okay. Pit this in a scenario. How do they go about solving the escape room? You know, in the world of One Punch Man, I believe that the rules of the escape room would be such that, yeah, he would just punch his way out and he would not need to- You are like some kind of like superhero exam, like get out of the room. Yeah, he would just be like, bam, I'm out. Well, it didn't ask us if it's an escape room in his world. Presumably an escape room like ours. Yeah, same thing, right? Like the whole point of an escape room is- Actually, no. Actually, no. I think, on his right, Aaron would win because when's the one time that Saitama failed or not failed, but didn't come out the strongest when he was taking the hero exam. Yeah, the next time he failed. The world outside of like power level, which in Saitama's case is hidden, the world is designed to make Saitama basically look as weak as possible until the moment that actually matters. And- You make a good argument there, sir. And solving an escape room is not a world ending situation, you know? Yeah, he got like the lowest grade on the written test, right? Yeah. Like that's why he was like a C-class hero. Yeah. You know what? You might be right. You might be right. And Aaron is kind of smart. He gets smarter. He's at least manipulative, you know, like- Yeah, he's cunning. I would say he's smart. He gasped smart enough to brute force an escape room quicker than Saitama. Yeah. He gaslit the entire- he gaslit the audience into thinking he was smart, which is smart enough. So damn, Saitama falling at one- Aaron? Aaron? Wow. That's embarrassing for Aaron. Man, if there are any people skipping around in this episode, they're going to look at this and be like, what the fuck? How the fuck? Man, I- I just- he kind of doesn't even feel good for- as a win for Aaron. I- I don't- we were like, yeah, he's dumb as shit, but you know. All right, next up. We got- All right. We got Yor from Spy Family versus Luffy. Ooh, this is an interesting one. Uh, longest to survive in Arkham Asylum? In Arkham Asylum? Yeah. Um, well, hmm. Hmm. Survive. I mean, I feel like- I don't know, I just feel like Luffy would run the place. Yeah. I mean, we all slowly impaled down. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel- I feel like this is just the impaled down arc. You're like, come on, Batman, let's go! Joker, come on! He would like- Run through the whole shit. He might even like change the Joker's world. Yeah, I think so. Shit, maybe I had made the real problem. This Luffy guy, he's all right. He's all right, this Luffy guy. I like him. Yeah, actually, it's literally- Nah, nah. You're kind of cool. Luffy. Society. Society. Society. It's all society's problem. We can change things around here, Luffy. Yeah, I mean, you all would definitely survive in Arkham Asylum. Luffy would fucking run the place. Luffy would run the place. Yeah. I don't think it's a question of your ability to survive. It's just more that- Yeah. It just feels like Luffy's second home. Yeah. Like that's what you gotta make do, you know? Yeah. He's just one of those guys that you can- you know, he's like- everyone's got that friend where you can just leave him with a group of friends. Yeah. And he doesn't know them, and he'll become best buds with them. True. At the time you're back. He's just too powerful. Too much charisma. He's got too much charisma. You know, he's just brute force charisma. I think he would run the place. Yeah. It's unfortunate for your, but your journey ends here. Yeah, I think so. All right, Luffy and W. See ya, buddy. All right, next up, we got Eskinor from Seven Daily Sins versus Kensho from Fist of the Norse. Two very somewhat similar characters. Yeah. Pure masculine brute force. Same build. Yeah. Well, only half the time for Eskinor. Yeah. All right. So, the category is for these two macho men, who will be the more successful pop star? Oh, fuck. That's hard. The more successful pop star? Well, let's think then. What are the key traits to a successful pop star? Marketability. Marketability. Right. Yes. The best pop stars, especially in Japan, especially in the idol scene, are like, you know, if you have like certain, you know, phrases or, you know, maybe songs that are instantly recognizable. Yes. So, what's the best place with Kensho? What's one line that everybody knows from Kensho? Or why one more Shindai? How would you incorporate that in a song, J? If you were to make a song. Just imagine. I can hear the song already, right? It's this grandiose pop song, and then it gets to like a climax. The instruments fade away. Yeah. It just slowly goes, oh my, one more Shindai. It's so much more hype. What does Eskinor have? All right. Three frames of animation. Okay. So, we have a counter argument here. So, as you may know, Eskinor is not always a buff man. Okay. He has two forms. Can we pull up the two forms on the, on the screen? Two forms of Eskinor. We want to show the Eskinor side by side, just so we can kind of understand what he has. Yeah. Okay. So, we got normal Eskinor there. And then, yeah. Yeah. Here we go. I mean, okay. What I want to, what I want to propose is that he can also be the twink and also the daddy. He can, he is the most marketable man. You, this is genius. He gets both the fans. He doesn't have to settle for one group. He gets both. The girls might like the shy boy. Is anyone, is anyone going to go for the shy? Who's going to go for the one on one? No, no, girls love a shy boy, right? Maybe he does emo in the, in the, you know, like he can be a little bit of like, you know, a visual K or a bit of emo. And then when he wants, he can become the fucking daddy Eskinor legit. I just Eskinor on the left is literally that meme of like, if your guitarist looks like this, you're going to die in the mosh pit. He's the ultimate pop star waiting, you know, he's got it all. He's got it all. He can be kind of hard. Can't you know, you know, he's got a mile machine to yippie buddy. We got a twink. Yeah. Eskinor can do like the clean vocals to the left and then also the growls on the right. He's got the full range. Question though. Question is that mustache working in 2025? Part of a sand. Is that mustache working in 2025? I think you shave it. You shave it. All right. Yeah, but it will be the same if you shave it. That's the thing. That's part of his character. He's got the big build, but he's got the baby face. But I think that even if he shaved it, probably every time he transforms to being the guy on the right, he probably just grows it back instantly. Just from the sheer testosterone that is coursing through his lips. He just looks like a fucking 90s porn star. That's exactly why. Ned Flannis versus 90s porn star. You know, who are your main audiences with pop stars? What are we talking about? I just realized, Eskinor is basically if you put Ned Flannis through a Bucky filter. I just realized this right now. When he's skinny, he, you know, a lot of the, you know, the women will like, you know, they say like the, the chai boys. Right. And then we have the gaze covered with Eskinor on the right. So I think like he's really covering the whole spectrum here of pop and joys. Can we load up a picture of Kinshore? Bring up a picture of Kinshore. Has there been a fissure of the North Star Idol collab or something? Just, well, such as Fischl of North Star Idol, cause I'm, I'm like, Let me interrupt your podcast to pitch you on another podcast. I'm Wutak, one of the hosts of above the influence show, the evolution of the notorious under the influence show. And to put it simply, we are three guys at very different stages of life, navigating self improvement and sharing it with you in real time in ways that you can laugh at me. Wutak, I'm 30 and a college dropout juvenile delinquent turned CEO of Superbanzai and eight figures. And we're a year supplement brand as well as a social media personality with millions of followers across platforms. I am bitch trap. I am 26 years old, unemployed influencer who went viral for his mugshot back in 2020 and is adapting to regular life from his traumatic hood, the morgens. And I'm Ian, a 24 year old real life SpongeBob who has never done an ounce of trauma in my life. So we like to discuss business, dating, religion, substances and trauma. If you want relatable content, you can learn from subscribe to above the influence show for free on Spotify, Apple podcasts or wherever you're listening. Thanks for letting me interrupt. Now back to the show. I'm just curious. There must be some kind of collab somewhere there, right? Oh yeah. There's the love life. Eskinon could do this easily, bro. Oh yeah, because there was there was the parody manga of Fist of the North Star, which is like strawberry flavored North Star. I think it's called. Where I think, yeah, I forgot if they like do idol stuff at one point, but they do do like a music thing. Right. Well, fuck. You know, you know, you know, you're making a really good point for Eskinon though. I will say. You know, I think my heart is saying, can't you? Yeah. I just I just feel like he has. What the fuck? He has the catch phrase. He clearly has the experience as well with his. Also, he's got his boys. So it can be like a full like male idol group. You know, yeah, yeah, you know, he's got his boys too. But like, Raoul talking like a group together. Yeah. Yeah. This is crazy. I just gave you the best argument ever and you were saying no. Oh my God. No, because you don't understand who are you really appealing to here? Who's going to catch hold them into Superstar? No, it's the female fan base. Yeah. And also look as for me, if I saw that group there as an fucking pop group or an idol group, I'd be more inclined to listen to I want to listen to what music that makes. Can you imagine? Yeah. Travesty. Travesty. I'm going to go. I'm going to go. I'm going to go for this one. I think you made a good point for Eskinon, but I tried to. Yes. Ken Schro for the W. Yeah. All right. I'm going to go for the DG from chainsaw man versus gojo from Jews, the Kaisen. And what's the category? There's not a lot of categories. Danji can win this. Yeah. I'm going to change worse to best because they gave me worst at getting through TSA security checkpoints. I mean, I'm 100%. Yeah. He is the worst at getting through TSA. Yeah. I'm not sure what categories. You could beat gojo in general. Does he even have a chance with him in a fight? No, no. Gojo would win in a fight as well. Gojo wins instantly. This is a bad match up for danger. Yeah. This is an awful match up. I mean, I think anyone who goes against gojo is an awful match. Yeah. He's the most charming. He's the sexiest kind of a smart guy, fun to be around. And also the most OP. He's kind of got it all. Yeah. Also, Danji would just get absolutely fucked in like a metal detector thing. Immediately. I feel like there's not a lot of situations where Danji out, gojo, anything. Yeah. Beats him in anything. I do. Like it's kind of tough. Maybe being DJ and that's about it. Yeah. Yeah. Most likely to jerk it. Who can jok their peanuts? The best Danji would win. Most likely to jerk it in a public space. Yeah. Probably Danji would win. We'd have to really start getting like negative categories. All right. All right. Gojo. Gojo. Gojo. Yeah. This one's pretty fast. Let's give it a gojo. All right. Next up, we got gone from Hunter Hunter versus Rudius from Michel Coutenso. The category is most likely to pass a job interview. Well, Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Well, Mushoku, I believe, means no job. So can you see gone passing a job interview? Jobless. Look, that is in the title. Yeah. No, I could, gone would be a personality hire. Yeah. He'd be like, you know what? You're an okay guy. They would hire gone to restore the office vibes. Also gone did pass the Hunter test. So it's not a job. That's not a job. Kind of. No, that's getting a license. Like getting driving a car is getting a job. They're not committing to dealing with you. He's allowed to hunt, but would he be hired? If anything, they loved it. So you can get fucking rid of him. He's going to leave them alone. True. And Rudius is all about becoming a jobless person to actually. Okay. I think we're going to show up to the job interview. Might not pass the background check. Just going to be real with you. He's like, so I saw your Twitter. Can you explain your life? So it says here, damn she nasty. And there's a picture of a 10 year old. Could you explain this? You know that point where you have to put like your job, your social media on like your CV nowadays. It's like, yeah. So we saw your Twitter likes and who's really putting as a reference. We called your reference and she said, Google Gaga, what is going on with that? She said she had a restraining. I think it's going to go on, but then they're like, they're trying to hire a guy like gone. So you're, you're 13. We really want like the worst job application. These two, these two are who I got a pick from. I don't think Rudius is even going to fucking show up to the job interview. To be honest. Okay. Let's even want a job. Yes, he does because he, you know, it's all about, you know, being a better man and learning from your mistakes. Right. You know, out of both of them. Is it Rudius? You know, which I know this, we had this question, but like Rudius grows so much as a character. So it's like day one, Rudius. Look, if it's previous word, Rudius, let's, let's just like call it quits right now. He wouldn't show up. He's depressed. He would fuck you. You know, you know, current Rudius, he's qualified. He's been through university. He's been to university, you know, I just feel like the job interview would be, you know, he'd be like, all right, I'm just, why do you want this job? I'm trying to support two wives. Yeah. Strange family. What is what is going on? Rudius. Yeah. He's got a little bit of baggage, but you know, out of, out of both of them, he's missing an arm. He is. Spoiler alert. You know, he's, he's, he's on, he's on benefits, you know, so I think Rudius would be an Uber driver. Why would he be? I would not want Rudius as an Uber driver dude. Hell no. I just feel like he would, he'd be like, nah, fuck real employment. He's like, so how old are you? I'd say out of both of these, Rudius is more desperate for a job because he has, he has, he has not just a family, but wives. Take care of him. Sure. He, he needs this job. I just don't think gone would care. I also think it would be funny to see what other jokes we can make about Rudius. Generally, I think Rudius takes this one. I ironically qualified needs the job. He wouldn't pass the background check, but maybe he might. The background check is in another life. You know, all right. We'll give it a Rudius then. Rudius. I just shook his head. Ain't no way. All right, next up versus God's. Okay. Two very similar characters. Two very similar. They have both very apathetic. Yeah. Okay. The category is who would be the best assassin. Oh, I mean, that's tough. See, God's isn't exactly a sneaky with his kills. Yeah. He would play the way I play it. He's like, all right. So I killed everyone and destroyed the place. Yeah. Fuck God's. It's like we needed you to be more low key. Yeah. But if you needed the guy dead, mob, you could send him in. Yeah. Mob though. He, he can blend. He has zero aura, you know, and also no one would suspect the kid. Yeah. True. Yeah. And if he shaved, he would practically be a shadow. And you know, there was an arc was there wasn't arc in golden age where guts was an assassin and he wasn't great at it. I mean, you know, was there? I don't remember that. Do you not remember when, you know, we need money, right? No, no, no, no, no, no. When Griffith needed him to dirty work. Oh, yeah. He accidentally kills the fucking kid in the process. That's right. The guards and very, very lucky to not get caught or spotted. Wasn't the cleanest job in the world though. Why did he send guts on that? Huh? Terrible choice for an assassin. Absolutely die. Like as for as terrible, he should have known better. Let's get the guy with the nine foot sword. Yeah. I liked that he did use the nine foot sword for the assassination weapon as well. Okay, guys, we're here on the murder scene and swing that thing. Yeah. The body has been stated in half. Let's just say, let's just say he made a clean assassination without getting seen or killing a kid or something. The cops turn up to the murder scene. They see a body bludgeon to death with what looks like a nine foot pound of steel. What? What could the murder weapon possibly be? I think the only thing that is against mob, and I think it's a pretty good reasoning not to choose mob, is that I just don't think he would want to do it. Yeah. I think he'd be against it. Whereas I think there is a world where guts would do it. I mean, we've already seen it. Well, payment often he'll do it. Or just, you know, just giving him a good enough reason. There's no farms with killing things. He will do it. He would do the dirty work even needs to be done. Yeah. You know. Whereas mob not so much. I think mob would be a more efficient assassin in this world. He would be a cleaner assassin. But he would be going against his character. It would be going fundamentally against his character. Yes. You know, I'm happy to pick guts. I think so. I think mob wouldn't want to do it. He would refuse. He'd be like, I'm okay losing this. All right. Guts takes this one. All right. All right. The big two. Goku versus Deku. The two Cous. All right. The most whining competition. And the category is who would achieve the highest elo in a chess in chess? Well, oh my God. Goku is dumb as shit. I think it would probably be Deku. Right. Could could Goku get smart if it's getting, you know, Goku has shown he has a high battle IQ. Yes. You know, which is kind of chess, which is this kind of chess. It could you train Goku? What opening would Goku use? The bomb cloud, right? Yeah. Um, I mean, that is true. Goku does have like a better. I'm so glad. I'm so glad this isn't the next one. Yeah. Yeah. It'd be a wrap. Yeah. Okay. Look, Goku, yes, does have a better sense of like, you know, maybe like when he's winning or when he's losing his stuff like that. I mean, he's kind of losing this not because Deku has any reason he should win. Yeah. It's just got the Goku is so fucking dumb. Yeah. Now, Deku, Deku, I think takes us easily. I just, I just remembered he's a fucking nerd. He is it? Well, yeah. But I don't know if he's a chestnut. He's not a chestnut, but he's a nerd. He's a, he's a superhero nerd, right? Yeah. You know, how he manages to figure out all of these, all of these different powers and stuff like that. You know, he, he has more insight than Goku does. He does have the notebook. So I, okay. I think Deku will take this one. Wow. Goku and Saitama are out. That's crazy. All right. Next up, Turbo Granny from Dandan versus Light Yagami. Okay. I hope it's not a wits. Yeah. Okay. And I assume he has the death note in this. Yeah. Let's, let's, let's say he has the death note. Yes. Why is this a category? Best they're projecting their identity. I'm not good. That is a bit too on the nose. That's a little too on the nose. Let me, let me, worse grandpa. Why, why is this? I, I, I'm not fucking, I'm not fucking kidding. I still think somehow it would be light. Okay. The category is best at raising money for charity. Light 100%. Yeah. Light. Right. He's fucking conniving and evil. He'd know how to do it immediately. Or you just get your death note out and you write, all right, Elon Musk, you will, you will jump off a cliff after donating 500 billion to this charity. Turbo granny as well though, on the other hand, you know, we're talking, you know, I assume like early turbo granny before she got sucked into the, the cat. Yeah. You know, she could pull off that move being like, if you don't want to get cursed, come to the tunnel and drop off 2 million. Yeah. But you have to go into her fucking neighborhood. Yeah. But you don't know that. That's how she gets. As soon as you have these countryside, they're broke as shit. Joe, they got no fucking money. They should be like, give me 20,000 yen. I think light wins. Yeah. I think I was trying to make an argument for this scenario. I think unfortunately, right. All right. Naruto versus Joe tarot. Okay. And the category is loses the most money in Las Vegas. Well, Joe tarot did win against Daniel J Derby. He did. I mean, he's a great gambler. He's a great gambler. Is Naruto a good gambler? Does he gamble? Has he ever gambled before? I'm trying to think in. Does he just doesn't seem like he would be a good gambler. You could, I mean, presumably if I was about to lose on the table, you know, I see like, I'm like, I'm like snapshotting with, you know, I'm like stopping time for seven seconds and I'm watching this roulette wheel slowly realize I'm fucked. I would grab my money and run in the seven seconds that I can stop time. See, we got it. We got established as well. We got established as well. Like what, what gambling game are we playing here? Like what are we gambling on? It's whatever they want. I think I knew Naruto bro. He played roulette. He's just got that atmosphere. Naruto would just fucking cog your bunch in and put it one on everything and just win. He'd go to the chair. You would wouldn't he? But no, you'd still lose because the casino would win actually. That's true. How does the power work? Can you explain this to me? Tell me I don't gamble. I just realized you don't even need Kage Buenschen. You can just do that yourself. Yeah, that's true. One person can bet on every every number. Can you tell I don't gamble? He would go straight to the slot machine and just sit there and 19 hours brain rotting on those stupid fucking slot machines. Jotaro again, just like he's got the experience from Daniel J. Derby. So I just think Jotaro win. I think it's pretty easy. Well, it's who would lose the most. Oh, who would lose the most? Okay. I think you change it to be who would be. I mean, anyone can lose the most money. Who'd be the better gambler? Jotaro definitely would be a better gambler. Jotaro's got a proven track record gambling. Yeah. Playing poker. Bro put his granddad on the line. Yeah, that's true. That's true. Put his granddad on the line. Yo, he's got the poker face man. Yeah, he does. Yes. All right. Jotaro takes this one. My go. All right. My boy. Next up an interesting one. We got Takupi versus Tancho. Best international spy. Well, Tancho never left Japan. Takupi's from space. Would Takupi be a good spy? I think so. Well, yeah. I would trust Takupi almost immediately. Yeah. He didn't get caught for fucking ages. He doesn't have to lie. Can Takupi lie? He can't lie. He did learn how to start lying. I think he started learning to not be so truthful. Yeah. And he can rewind time. So even if he fucks up, he can go back in time. On the other hand, Tancho is so fucking dumb. I would never think he's a spy. He's such a fucking far. I would not fucking trust Tancho. But I would never think he is capable of being a spy. But I'm going to make an argument. I feel like Tanjiro has more experience being a spy. Remember in the entertainment district talk where they needed to infiltrate and find the demon and who was the most effective spy out of all three of them? It was Tanjiro. They didn't even know that he wasn't, you know. Also Takupi is like too optimistic and happy to a fault. So if he gets caught and they're like, say your secrets, he'd just be like, okay. Friendship time. Friendship is like, if I say it, will you be my friend? It's like, yes. Yeah. Oh, that's tough. I'm going to Tanjiro with this one. Yeah. I mean, look, I wouldn't trust either of these bastards to spy on anything. But if I had to pick. Yeah, probably Tanjiro would be the least assuming. Yeah. Fine Tanjiro. Tanjiro. We'll give the devil a time. Takapis. Yeah. You swayed me with your eye. All right. Next up, Ichigo from Bleach versus Sabre. Who swords people? Two big swords people. And this has nothing to do with swords. Okay. This is who is the best at selling Girl Scout cookies? I'm not familiar with Ichigo. So you guys would have to help me out here with this argument. Ichigo is just kind of like a chill dude. He's a chill dude. He's just kind of a chill guy. I feel like Sabre wouldn't really have a sales pitch. She's like Sabre at the door. You would answer and you'd be like, could I get two? And she'd be like the price is always the same. I would never adjust the price. I'll throw one for free for you. I'd say two for four. You know, Sabre would show up at the door and she's like, buy these cookies. Buy them now, please. You know. I will not leave until you buy one. For the honor of my nights, for the honor of my heritage, please buy these cookies right now. My master said I need to sell all of these in the next 30 minutes and I will not leave until I do. What would Ichigo's sales pitch be? He's just be like, buy these. I mean, Ichigo is just like a normal dude. Is he 15 years old? How old is Ichigo? I think at the beginning of the anime, he's 15. But Sabre is hot and I would be more into my cookies from Sabre. True. Is Ichigo anything? 15 at the start. Yeah, 15 at the start. So, you know, also I feel like that's more close to the age that would be selling Girl Scout cookies as well. I would buy from Sabre. Why? Because she's hot. I mean, you're not wrong. I would have a hard time saying no. You're not wrong. Which, yeah, I'm trying to imagine which I would rather prefer to buy from. I mean, I'd rather probably hang out with Ichigo, for example. He's the kind of dude who would be like, hey, I laced these Girl Scout cookies with weed. You want one? I just want to smoke weed with it. He would definitely sell you weed cookies, bro. Yeah. You know what I mean? I don't know. Whereas Sabre would be like too like, you know, I haven't even touched this package. You know, I feel like the girls would buy from Ichigo, you know, to counter your Sabre. He's a good looking boy. He's a good looking dude. Who's getting it then? I'm Camp Sabre. I might go Ichigo. Garn, you have the deciding vote. Who's wisely? Get away! So embarrassing. They're growing up. Won't be long before the thought of a family holiday is just. But with Hilton's staycations all over the UK, we don't need to go far to feel close. And with connecting rooms confirmed when we book, we'll have plenty of space to make the most of every moment. Everyone in the photo! When time away means time together, it matters where you stay. Book now at hilton.com. Hilton for this day. I'm going to have to go against my bloodline and go Ichigo for this one. Damn, alright. Ichigo for the dub. Alright, Ujido versus Toguro. Toguro, the younger brother Toguro. Not the older brother Toguro from U-Haksha. Alright, well, two big dudes. Two big dudes. The category is... Last alive in a drinking contest. Oh my God. Well, Toguro can only drink orange juice. Ujiro can drink a whole bottle of whiskey to himself. This is literally the meme of the strongest soldier versus the weakest. I forgot he could only drink orange juice. He can only drink orange juice. Whereas Ujiro, then one time he went to a bar with Hanayama. He did the crack with the whiskey bottle. I'm down to have a quick one. Ujiro, Gigi bro. Ujiro instantly. There's also, I don't know Toguro very well, but I can't imagine there's many situations where he is more physically capable than Ujiro. Well, unless he goes 100% Toguro, which he's still lost to Yusuke. But yeah, in a drinking contest, Toguro can only drink orange juice, so Ujiro would win. Alright, Ujiro takes this one. Who would win the fight though, you think? 100% Toguro or Ujiro? That's such a good question. Well, let's think about it. Ujiro, yes, is the most powerful creature on the planet, but he did. Clearly not. Yeah, well, clearly not because in part three, he did lose to an imaginary table flip. So, you know, pretty weak. He was scared of, he couldn't believe it. He couldn't believe it. He's like, I can't believe you just flipped this table. I'm out. Whereas at least Toguro, you know, put up a fight. Yeah. Alright, well moving on then. Kirito versus Lelouch. This is like 2012, 2013 peak. Yeah. The category is biggest class clown, Kirito. No, Lelouch could also, he could be like, if I calculate to make this joke right here, right now, I'll carry favor. Who are the next generation of kids that they have? They'll know me as the funniest person in this empire. Oh yeah, all Lelouch could be like, Lelouch V Britannia commands you to laugh. No, it would be Lelouch trying to get them to laugh and them laughing at him, not with him. And then he would bring out the Gyr. I don't think Kirito made me laugh a single time. I did it at the Lelouch, but that wasn't because Lelouch wasn't trying to be funny. He was just not a funny guy. He's kind of like takes himself too seriously. Oh, no, Lelouch trying to get the cat helmet. That was like, Lelouch, you are like a 500 IQ person. It was very funny when he accidentally said like, oh, you should be so funny to kill people. That was really funny. That was arguably the funniest part of the whole show. Kind of hilarious. It's really so funny we did this right now, guys. It was hilarious if I told you all to kill yourself. The Klaus clown is always the guy who is the one who usually instigates some kind of chaos in the classroom. So Lelouch could very easily just be... If you sit next to Lelouch in a class, it could be like, hey, Lelouch, can you make that guy shoot himself real quick? A hypothetical world where Lelouch is like, shit yourself. I command you to shoot yourself. It's like, yeah, let's go, bro. Oh my God. Yeah, I think Lelouch takes this one. Give the dobbie to Lelouch. I don't think there's many scenarios where Kirito wins. No, no. Next up, Gabimaru from Jigokudaku Hell's Paradise versus Megumin from KonoSuba. Alright, interesting lineup. Most trustable valet driver. I'll be real with you. Megumin won't even know how to start the car. Yeah, Gabimaru wouldn't be able to start the car either. Yeah, true. But I just feel like Megumin, if she even did start the car, instant wall crash. Yeah, true. And then she'd be like, Zoe, oopsies. She'd run like 100 Ks into a wall and just go, Explosions! I'm fucking demolishing the car. I feel like... Oh, it's a combustion engine. Oh, I can do that. Explosions! I feel like with Gabimaru, neither of them know how to drive a car. Yes. Right. But I feel like with Gabimaru, I could expect my car back in one piece. Megumin, it's like a point flip. You think so? It's like she would, would this car come back vaporized? You know, like how good does my insurance in this car? Right, right. Who am I leaving this with? Yeah, but at the same time, right, look, like Gabimaru can't die. Maybe in the car. So he'd be like, I don't care how fucking tough I drive this car. Megumin's a type of girl, though, if I lent my car to her, I feel like she would start like moonlighting being an Uber driver in it. And I'd be like, dude, what the fuck? Why did you start taking fucking Uber? Uber fucking requested my car. The fuck is wrong with you, Megumin? I'm letting you my car for the weekend. The fuck is this? Yeah, wait, wait, wait. I mean, it would come back smelling like piss and have an extra, like 10,000 miles on it. I just realized, right? Who is more like, say they're a valet driver. Who is more likely to steal your car? Both of them. Megumin. Because we are coming into the assumption that they are going to give their car back. But I don't think Megumin would give our car back. Period. Yeah, maybe we'll be like, how much is a toilet roll in there? Okay. And it's like, I was just, she's relaying, right? So even if I trusted her to park this car, I don't trust her to park this car. Yeah. I've never seen a parking lot in the life. That's true. Get Maru at least, you know, maybe I could believe he could understand the concept of squaggo and hole. I don't think I don't trust Megumin to do that. All right. Yeah, I might have to give it a Gabi Maru. I guess Gabi Maru takes this one. Yeah. All right. Last one on round one. We've got Haruhi from Suzumi Haruhi versus Shinji from Evangelion. Okay. Who winds the most? Haruhi doesn't wind. Haruhi doesn't wind. She kind of winds. Most likely to be a pro skateboarder. We changed that one. Yeah. Shinji, the kind of dude who would have the elbow and knee pads. Yeah. He would not even want it. He's like, he'll be like, the helmet's not enough. You wouldn't even want to get on it, bro. All right. Best, the new category is best personal assistant. They would both be horrible. Shinji would not fucking do anything. Shinji wouldn't even turn up to work. No, he'd be like, I'm sad. I'm like, bro, I got to, I use- Shinji's like, I'm taking a mental update today. You know, boss. Yeah, but Haruhi- I'm fine for the next week. Haruhi would be the kind of assistant who would hire her own assistant. That's so true. She would just be like, I'm not doing this fucking job. You do it. And then report back to me and I'll take all the credit. And Haruhi would buy like $3,000 with the boo-boos and the company car. And you'd be like, what the fuck, Haruhi? What the fuck is wrong with you? We're taking over the wall with this trust. Like I didn't tell you to do that. Why did you invest in Bitcoin, Haruhi? What the fuck? We don't even do- I'm not even an investing firm. Why did you do that? She's like, nah, trust. We sell pets, Haruhi. Look, I feel like this is horrible because I feel like the worst Shinji could do is just not do his job. Yes. I feel like the worst Haruhi could do is sabotage your entire fucking business from the ground. Take over the company. Yeah, take over the company and then sabotage it in the process. Yeah, that's true. She would get you on some IRS kind of like, whoopsies, I refiled your taxes. She's like, why did you do that? We have an accountant, Haruhi. What the fuck? I didn't even tell you to talk to the accountant. And then she'd be like, have you ever seen the Disappearance Assistant me, Haruhi? It's a bit of a faggot. So where'd she go? I think it'd be any more higher, Haruhi, to begin with. It was probably like my uncle made me do it. That's like a favor. He's like, yeah, my fucking, my uncle's got some niece I have to hire. My uncle said she was hot. Yeah, I look, I wouldn't want to hire either, but I think it might have to go to Shinji in this case. I think he would have to go to Shinji wins by doing nothing. Yeah, it wins by default. Okay, next up. All right, we are starting round two, starting with Muhammad Ali, Jr. versus Aaron. All right. And the category is most likely to bring a gun to a knife fight. Oh my God. They both would. Muhammad Ali, Jr. would. Muhammad Ali would be like, I can't beat them in a fist fight. I'm pulling out the gap. Aaron would also do the same. Aaron would 100, shit, they both bring a gun to a knife fight. I think it would probably, I feel like Aaron's a bit more cowardly in my eyes. But didn't Muhammad Ali, Jr. run away from a fight from like, He did. He did. Oh man, they both would fuck. Who would be more likely? Who would be more likely? I feel like Aaron would try to like, I think for Aaron, pulling out the gun would be like the last resort. Whereas for Muhammad Ali, Jr. it'd be like choice number two. You know what I mean? I feel like Aaron would try to convince like gaslight Muhammad Ali, Jr. to like be like, We're both freaking just knives, right? This is a knife fight. Ain't no way I'm bringing a gun. Ain't no way, ain't no way. And they'd be like, surprise, motherfucker. Damn. Are we deciding Muhammad Ali, Jr.? No, I think Aaron, right? I think Aaron. You think Aaron? Yeah. Who would fool Muhammad Ali, Jr.? Yeah. Because I think they both, I think they would both bring one. Who's most likely though, I suppose the question. Also Aaron, but see Muhammad Ali, Jr. would bring the bigger gun. I feel like you would. I feel like you would. I don't think that matters. Well, I don't know, man. Pistol versus AK. I feel the AK would win. You know what I mean? You've been bringing a fucking AK. You never know. It's Muhammad Ali, Jr. He'll do anything to win. He's not the fucking like me. Bro will do anything to win. He's just like, I just need one W. Why? You don't think so? No, I think Aaron takes his one. I'm trying to think of a place where Aaron has actually cheated. Aaron would also look in the future. Yeah. And see that he's going to bring it. Yeah. He would only go to the fight if he knows the other opponent is bringing a knife. True. So I got to give this one to Aaron. We'll give it to Aaron. All right. All right. Sorry, Muhammad Ali, Jr. Nothing at you, Sue. Luffy versus Kenshiro. All right. The category is survives the longest on a desert island. Oh, man. Well, Kenshiro is living in his story. He is living in a time where food is very scarce. Right? Like people are starving all over the place. And yet he's able to fucking maintain that. How? Where is he getting his protein? His need for protein is pretty concerning. Yeah. But he's able to maintain that build even in an apocalypse. How does he do it? What is he consuming? I don't know. And then on the other side, we have Luffy who is the most voracious eater. Yeah. Of all time and also complains fucking constantly. Exactly. About being hungry in a food well stocked and a well stocked with food. Bro, bro. He's a personal chef. Yeah. And is complaining about food shortages. Bro, I spent two days in alabaster and started complaining. You know, so. That's true. Kenshiro literally lives in a maybe a deserted island. Post-apocalyptic. In a dystopian or post-apocalyptic Mad Max kind of world. Where food is presumably. Yeah. Incredibly scarce. Where people have gone to like cannibalism. Yeah. People fight for food. Yeah. And meanwhile Luffy. You don't hear on complain a single time. Luffy's like me when there's no Uber Eats for five minutes. He's like complaining. He's like, oh. Yeah. I mean, maybe like biologically though, Luffy might be able to survive some fruit bollocks. I don't know. Maybe. Fruit bollocks. I'm not sure. I'm not sure it is Luffy have some kind of edge being made of rubber. I don't think you can suppress your hunger being a rubber man. But I mean hunger is not the issue. It's starvation. Well, it's Luffy. It's the mental game is they can Luffy in a life or death situation. No restraint. I don't. I mean, I think he would resort to cannibalism. Whereas Kenshiro has got all that extra calories to like both resort to cannibalism. But I think Kenshiro wouldn't mind though. Kenshiro would be like, so be it. Sure. Sure. Kenshiro is like, this is just a Tuesday. Yeah. You go to the dead body and say, oh my, my, my, my, my. My, my, my, my, my. Yeah. I mean, I feel like I'm going to give this to Kenshiro. I mean, you know, your, your muscle turns to fat and these things and then you'd have more fat. Luffy's a skinny boy. I also think Kenshiro would have the mental fortitude to be able to just be like, I will now move not, not so much. Yes. Yes. He went through the training to get the hawk to shinken. So yeah, he would win. Yeah. Rip Luffy. All right. Rip Luffy. All right. Gojo versus Rudeus. Okay. All right. What possible, what possible scenario could Rudeus? He gets calories. Becomes the worst internet troll. Oh shit. Oh my God, bro. I mean, arguments could be made for this kind of already done this in the real world. Rudeus man. Gojo is kind of toxic IRL though. Yeah. He is toxic IRL, but Rudeus is already so controversial online that I feel like he would be so good at this. Yeah. Rudeus would be the kind of guy to become controversial without trying to be. I don't think Rudeus would even be trying to troll. Yeah. He would just say his thoughts and people would be like, oh God. Bro, imagine Rude with a Twitter account. Rudeus would be on, am I the asshole? And people would just keep saying yes. Yeah dude, Rudeus is a four channel for sure. Be me. Be reincarnated. She's a 10, but she's also 10. Yeah. Gojo is the IRL troll for sure. I didn't think there was a world where Rudeus could be Gojo or something, but being an online troll, I kind of think maybe Rudeus is the answer. I think it's kind of close because. But also Gojo would be such a good troll. Gojo troll is IRL. Yeah. And I think if you gave him a Reddit account, he'd find a way. Like, you know, just like remember that moment where he was fighting the fucking volcano guy, I can't remember his name. He's a really strong one-eyed volcano guy. Yeah, the one-eyed one. Fuck, I shouldn't know his name. Yeah, I love him as well. Can't remember his name right now. See his face is literally Lebron and Kerry. Yeah. Do you not remember when he was like, I'm a belt? Jogo. Jogo, that's it. Do you not remember when he was like, I'm about to bring up my strongest technique and Gojo's like, yeah, yeah, hold on a second. Let me just get my students here. Just for a second. He goes, he go gets his student and he's going to be like, all right, watch this. I'm about to teach you how to just troll the fuck out of this guy. That is true. But will that translate to, but the category is internet troll, right? Yes. Will that translate to internet trolliness? In a wholesome way, I think you control the internet. Yeah. Whereas you should be an actual, you get the eye of the internet. Yes. It would work very hard. Yeah, definitely. In 2025, who would be more effective? Rudy. 100%. 100%. I think Rudy is unfortunately would be better internet troll. I think I would vote Rudy. Holy shit. All right. Well, I think, wow, I can't believe I'm about to say this. Gojo versus Rudy. Rudy is being so lucky with these categories. I know. Like most jobless, most most troll. It's all negative. It's like the all negative things. So he's winning. All right. Guts versus Deku. Okay. What possible world can Deku win? Um, at least likely to be depressed. Yeah. Okay. Most youngest. The shortest. Shortest. Okay. King. Most successful pro wrestler. Uh, I mean, if this is all my, this will be harder. I think. Yeah. Well, I mean, Deku's already kind of got a WWE outfit ready. He does. He does. He's got the outfit. Yeah. He's got like, he does all the catchphrases. He would shout all for one as he does like a fucking off. Yeah. Yeah. He's the guy on the ground. He's just goes all for one. Meanwhile, he does the thing where he shall sell his attack names as well. Detroit smash. He's covering it with the Detroit smash. And Deku, you know, he's, he's, he's a very John Cena type. He's like, this is for all the audience here and everyone here tonight in Milwaukee. He's just be like, I'm about to do it. Yeah. Pow. Whereas on the other hand, guts is practically would be an amazing. Yeah. Guts is not a showman. He'd be the undertaker type character. Yes. You know, he'd come in the fucking doom. Yeah. The sword, you know, carrying it high. He doesn't need the catchphrase. He's already got the look. He's got the Laura, especially if he's wearing the, you know, the Berserk armor. Oh, sure. Sure. God, what are the things that's coming in? Guts is probably like, what if it's just like Griffith theme? That would go so far. Guts to be like, cap a roach. This is my last resort. They could be like Evan essence or some shit. That could be like, I know, born in the USA. That could be like, bro. Cause he wants to be. That could be that you would have like fucking flamingo from Kara Kara money to. How many shrimp does it just coming in? It could be like baby shark or something. This is hard. Actually, this is a hard one. They both be amazing pro wrestlers. Yeah. Right. Yeah. I mean, the only thing that guts pretty has a solid advantage of is that he's built like a wrestler. Yes. Deku is more, you know, but he hasn't got the frame for it. Yeah. I mean, he's got the frame for it. Yes. But which would be the more entertaining wrestler? I think Deku would be the better showman. Yes. Definitely. But I don't think guts needs to be a showman. He is. He's got the aura, bro. Yeah. The aura himself. Deku has to make up for that. True. True. Oh man, this is hard. I'm imagining who would I rather see in the ring? I think it's got to be guts. I'm going to go with guts for this one. Bro, it'd be so high whenever guts comes on, man. That's like just whatever his theme song is, just he comes on stage. Paparouch. We've decided it's Paparouch. All right, fucking all about guts. All right, guys, you get this one. Just for aura points. Yeah. Okay. Light versus Jotaro. This could be a good matchup in anything, I feel. Yeah. It's brains versus brawn. Well, I would say Jotaro also has brains as well. Yeah. He's quite smart. Okay. We'll deliver a pizza in the fastest time. Hmm. Hmm. Well, Jotaro can stop time. So, you know, you know, on the domino app when you can track like the delivery person. It would go from like 10 minutes to like two in an instant. I feel like, whoa, cool down on Star Platinum. He can't just eight seconds with it. No, that's that's the amount of time. I don't think he can spam it endlessly. Yeah. No, he can't spam it endlessly. I feel like lights could like pre-plan some kind of like algorithm. Yeah. He like gets Usain Bolt. He like types. I mean, whoever is the best car driver in the world. He'd have to stop it. Your job is to deliver a pizza. You have one car. You probably hack into like the traffic light system. He would. Yeah. And it's like, what's that? What's that film where they literally do that as a heist film where they literally like traffic system so that no matter where the car drives, it is always a green light. Sounds like Ocean 12. Yeah. Some of the Ocean 12s will show something like that. But light would literally do that. Jotaro would, I mean, he would rely on himself. He can literally stop time. He would, you know, yeah. I mean, he would be driving probably, I don't know how far, how far we are from the pizza location. Yeah. How long is the delivery time? Is it runnable? If it's runnable, then probably Jotaro. Yeah. If it's a longer distance, it'd be line. Yeah. Oh, it's hard. Yeah. But light could also just, you know, it'd be completely overkill, but he could just get a helicopter or something to land on the roof of the pizza store. And then how could he do that? Well, he's, he's, he also has been in helicopters before. He knows the helicopter pilots. That is true. Find their name and get a helicopter and be like instructions to you will, you will jump off a cliff after going to the nearest dominoes, getting a pizza and delivering it to this address. Yeah. Light you will have a heart attack. Yeah. Light could be like, if you don't deliver this pizza in 10 minutes, you will die. Well, I mean, I don't think he needs to do that. He's right in the death note. He just makes you do it. But you know, so I feel like it's pretty, it's pretty hard to imagine that if there's, everything needs to go right for Jotaro to win this. Unfortunately. I think it's personally. I think we're to go for light for this one. Okay. Jotaro falls to life. Oh my God. Okay. Next up, Tanjiro versus Ichigo. Oh, this is a hard one. Most trustable babysitter. They're both older brothers. So they both have experience. Yeah, but one has a dead family. So. So you think because it is my family dying, he's a hard babysitter. I don't know if it's Tanjiro's fault. Yeah, but you know, the facts still stand. You come back and you're like, wow, Tanjiro, I can't believe you didn't sacrifice your life fighting demons. When I trusted you, I'm like, bro, I left you for five minutes. My child is dead. It's obviously, Nezuko is in, you know, he takes very good care of Nezuko. That is true. Constantly looking after her. That is true. Watchful. Literally keeps him on her back. Yes. Tanjiro definitely is the more caring of the two. Yeah. Cause she's a demon. He does kind of lock her away. Ichigo is the kind of, Ichigo would be the kind of babysitter would just like put on Cartoon Network for an hour and then fuck off somewhere. Do you know what Ichigo would do? He'd sit down and then he'd go into like spirit form. He's going to like, all right, fuck, I'm going to go fuck off and play PS5 or something like that. Like his body is there, but his spirit is somewhere else. It could be a good babysitter though. He's just checked out. He needs a babysitter to be always watching him. They're both trustable people. They both have experience. They'll both get the job done, but just in their own ways. Yeah. Who would I rather? Okay. I'm imagining. I'm imagining. Okay. If I had a kid, it's your kid. It's your kid. Who would I rather have as a babysitter? Oh, shit. I think Tanjiro would be more attentive. I don't know. Tanjiro would clean my house as well. I'm like, why did you do that? Okay. Thanks. Ichigo will get the job done, but he would get the job done at the minimum standard. You know, I feel Ichigo would be the kind of babysitter who would introduce my kid to like a lot of cool things. Whereas Tanjiro would be the one who's like, okay, let's watch Coco Mellon. You know what I mean? He gives me that energy. Just because you want your kid to be cool, you're going to say Ichigo. Whereas Ichigo would be like, ah, fuck it. Let's watch Adventure Time, dude. You know what I mean? He's going to come back and he's going to be smoking weed, Joey. I'd be like, my man. I'm going Tanjiro. Alright, we'll give it to Tanjiro. Alright, Tanjiro. Alright, Ichigo falls to Tanjiro. Alright, next up, we got Ujiro versus Lelouch. Ujiro versus Lelouch. Ah, Ujiro is going to take this one easy. Best at eating a hot pepper, best at a hot pepper eating contest. A hot pepper? Hot pepper eating contest. A hot pepper eating contest? I mean Ujiro, it's just some shit that Ujiro would do for fun. Ujiro would snort them through his nose. And be like, more. He would do some kind of masculine display. Yeah, he would. Ujiro does the weirdest shit. He would twist his nipples and be like, look how manly I am. And we're like, nobody asked you to do this, Ujiro. Like, please put a shirt on. Yeah, like, what the fuck is wrong with you? Their children would do it. Lelouch should be like, look in the mirror and be like, eat the peppers, boy. Yeah, he could just like command to himself. Yeah. To be like, you will not feel pain. Has anyone ever died of eating too much peppers? I think some people have. Can you scientifically die from that? You can die from shock? Yeah. Yeah, no. I mean, like, look, if you gave a 90 year old person a retirement home, a Carolina Reaper, I'm sure it might sort them out. 27 people in police custody who died after exposure to pepper, no, not pepper spray. Eating a single chip. Oh yeah, yeah. I mean, when I was a kid who did the hot chip challenge who got like, I think he died or got hospitalized or something. Oh yeah, no, he died. Yeah. 14 year old kid from Massachusetts died. I saw him in person die because he tore his esophagus from retching. I think like there's a lot of side effects, but like the thing itself won't kill you. It's mostly your body going into shock. Yeah, it's your body can go into shock and all sorts of bad things can happen. All right, Ujiro's taken his one. Ujiro would like gladly eat it. Yeah, yeah. Ujiro would definitely eat it. He's the kind of guy who like goes to In-N-Out and just grabs a handful of those green peppers and just like eats them all. And you're like, why did you do that? Because I could. Yeah, exactly. That's what he'd say. All right. Last one for round two. We got Gabi Maru versus Shinji. Most beloved kindergarten teacher. Well, Gabi Maru would be the teacher that would probably give the kids trauma, whereas Shinji would be the teacher that the kids would make fun of. Shinji would be the one who's like, my students are bullying me. Oh my God. Shinji would not survive as a teacher. He would. I don't know what skibbity versus stop saying it. Please, please stop bullying me. He's the one who would cry in class. You know. It's been having like a really hard week guys. Guys, why aren't you listening to me? Please guys, please. Yeah, I just, there's not a lot that Shinji is good at. Unfortunately. True. See Gabi Maru, even though he like, yeah, but unfortunately for him, he hasn't had an opportunity to that scenario hasn't come out. As much as Gabi Maru would just like be terrible to a child's education because he just lacks empathy. Yeah. This whole bottom bracket, these like Gabi Maru, Megan, and Haruhi Shinji just been like, I'm in a competition and my opponent is blank. And they're the worst of it. Gabi Maru is kind of winning by default. Yeah. I mean, I literally kind of in good faith even argue for Shinji. Yeah. We'll give it a Gabi Maru then. Like Shinji is so fucking useless. All right. That was round two. We're on to round three. Now the top eight first up quarter finals, Aaron versus Kensho. All right. Most likely to be picked for a fashion runway. Fuck. Can we type in Aaron drip? I just want to see what comes up. Aaron Jager drip. Aaron got drip. Right. He's got an occasional drip. He's got a... Shit. Oh fuck. I forgot I have that jacket. Yeah, you do. I can't wait to whip it out, dude. See Kensho, the problem with Kensho is that he wouldn't be able to fit in any fucking clothes that's too big. That's exactly the kind of fashion. Yeah. But yeah, Aaron, I mean, Aaron, Aaron, Aaron, that one scene where he just like on the top of the jacket, that's the jacket on. Scroll down. Aaron does have like the better like model build. Yeah. I know Joe, you, you, you, you would you pick to model nonsense fucking images, bro. Jesus Christ. Who would I pick as a model nonsense stuff? Oh, Aaron is Aaron is the exact type of model you have an answer. That is true. Yeah. Yeah. I would probably get Aaron. You use, can you search Kenshiro drip? I mean, he's kind of normal. Yeah. He's that is dripped out as his normal fire. He doesn't need the memes to be dripped out. Look at that fit, man. The fit is so clean. Oh, shit. I think you put him in anything. Also, I will say Kenshiro has got the best pair of pants of any anime character. I want those pants, bro. He kills it in those. Bro. I think he like surely he must make denim single handedly more popular. Look at that. God, and the long boots too. Oh, man. Okay. All right. Bros. Drip down. Okay. Okay. I thought I was going to vote Aaron, but I think it's probably I think it's going to be Kenshiro. I ain't complaining. I ain't complaining. He's got that. He's got that model stank phase too. All right. Give it to Kenshiro. Give him to Kenshiro. All right. All right. Next up, Rudious versus Gods. Oh God, don't be another fucking rudious windswap being the worst person. I don't want to reduce the way that we got. Best contestant on one of those crazy Japanese game shows. Oh. Okay. Let's let's let's let's. I think they would both be bad. They would both suck. Yeah. They would both suck. Guts. Okay. If it's something like, you know, like the Sasuke, the Ninja warrior, yeah, obviously be got. Yeah. Obviously. But if we're talking like Takeshi's castle, I don't know, man. I think God would fucking suck at that. You know, I, okay. Let's just Rudious would have some kind of an advantage. Right. By being Japanese, having knowledge of the game show. True. True. Right. What is God's? I don't think he's ever established. What's looking up? What nationalities got? What's a bizarre takes place in the fantasy world, right? Yes. So it's whatever. I want to see fantasy world. Oh, is a midlander a game? Midlander. So he's European, right? The token European guy on the Japanese game show. There's got a token white guy. Yeah, but the token white guy usually doesn't win. He's just there kind of as like a joke. Yeah. You know, is this a physical based game show or a like a if it's a thing, you know, like a game show or a game show or a game show or a game show or a game show or a game show or a game show or a game show or a game show or a like a really thing. See, that's the thing. If it's a physical based game show like, say, Sasuke Ninja Warrior, then it'll be guts. But if it's a like a quiz show, what is the most popular one in Japan? Would you say the most iconic iconic probably to case your skull? In Japan as well. I'd say so. Yeah. Okay. I mean, it's a legendary show. Or again, like as I said, Sasuke Ninja Warrior would probably be the other famous one. You know, both are physical. I'm a vote of Rudius. Why? You just want him to win. He's Japanese also. I think he'd be hilarious to see how far he can get against. So the reason why Rudius would win is because of spawn diff. It's like, you see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just also, I mean, I struggle seeing guts wanting to play along and being, right? Whereas Rudius might think like, oh, I can further my goals of learning if I get power. True. Guts would be like, wait, I can't kill anyone. Why am I just I think guts would be interested. So I have to go with Rudius. Yeah. Shit. You might be right. Wins again from doing. Oh my God. How the fuck is Rudy's in the semifinals? All right. Anyway, next up light versus Tanja. OK, what's the category? The category is. How fast do we want this? Because I was a body saying we can discuss. Yeah, we want a discussion. OK. Because the one that could turn up was best dictator. Bro, I was gonna say best dick. And I'm like, hmm, I wonder. OK. Um. Let's see. Some of these are repeat ones. I can't believe Tanja has gotten this far. He's done well. He's done well. He has. He has done. I will say like most of the people who made it to the quarter finals, I was not expecting. Let's just say that. I should go tomorrow. All right. Here's here's one. OK. Most likely to be the best DJ. Hmm. Do either of them have good music taste? Would you would you trust either of their music tastes? Listen, does Tanja play an instrument in the show? Can you say Tanja instrument? See what comes up. Well, the thing is Tanja, well, demons layer sit in the Taisho period, right? So obviously the music would be a lot more. Let's traditional. Let's let's let's. Why is this so many images have been playing the violin? I don't know. I don't know. What is that from? Maybe like a maybe maybe like a demon slayer symphony or something. Yeah, yeah. So yeah. Whereas light, I don't know, man. Light. Light would definitely I'd say light would probably be better just because fucking dies at the end of the. It is so far. He kills everyone in the room. Yeah, it's like if light is DJing, everyone in the mosh pits die. Who would lights favorite music artists be even? I can imagine light in the boiler room. You know, there's videos of the guys DJing. Yeah. Everyone's like fucking dance. He'd be playing some like dark golf, you know, like some like, you know, classic German golf. Yeah. I just can't see Tanjiro playing anything that's not like billboard top 100. Sure. You know what I mean? Don't stop. Take it right. Yeah. Time is definitely the DJ that does the worst mashups you've ever heard in your life. Tanjiro is a fucking Swifty man. Look at that. Look at that. The bass is about to drop. And then you're like, where did you come from? Where did you go? I can't imagine. You know what? If I was hiring for a wedding, I hired Tanjiro in a heartbeat. That that that is the one hundredth kind of dude to make 80 percent of his set. Like imagine dragons. Remix. You love this one. I just a little bit of that. I would play my mother. Like the chicken dance. Yeah. Here we go. Yeah. I feel like light would like proficiently make the better set, but maybe not as like, you know, inviting to the general public. I know, you know, I've changed my mind. I think I would go Tanjiro. I trust him with the vibe more. I feel like light would have the most underground music taste. Yeah. If people don't like it, he would just fucking kill them. Yeah. He's just be like, you don't know this man. Oh, well, well, I guess you're going in the death. Another one. Wow. Brothers and no poop friends. Bye bye. Tanjiro feel like, hey guys, two thousand three. Mix it. All right. Fine. We'll give it a time to do it. I feel like time to you'd have the more fun time with Tanjiro. The more we discuss it, you know, I feel like Tanjiro would bring a good vibe. It would be a good vibe. Might not be everyone's vibe, but you know, at least, you know what? It'll get the aunts and uncles up and down. Yeah. This is Tanjiro. I know. You're going to get Mara. Best at surviving in a zombie apocalypse. Oh, well, Gabi Mara can't die. Is it? Is it canonical or is that just like law? I can't remember. I think it's canonical, right? Because I like he's like Gabi Mara, the immortal. Yeah. Yeah. Because throughout the show, they try and kill him so many times. That's just because no one can kill him. Yeah. As opposed to he cannot die. I imagine that the zombies, like if they bit Ujro, they wouldn't even be able to pierce his skin. Hmm. You know, I feel like he would be like, what is wrong with you? See, so see, this is difficult because we got someone who is unable to die versus the strongest creature on the planet. So could he be turned? Could he be turned into a zombie? Basically, he already is a zombie. I mean, could he like another zombie apocalypse? Yeah. He turned into a zombie and like a mindless. Oh, he's tough. I got to go Ujro with this one. I just can't imagine a world where Ujro doesn't survive this zombie apocalypse or kill every zombie. Yeah. Yeah, but I feel like Ujro would like slip up just because he's like not taking the situation seriously enough. Can you imagine a zombie biting him, bro? It wouldn't work. I mean, I don't know if they would get through. I don't know. I don't know. Hamsters can definitely make a way through. Something else. Ujro would just see it as a fun challenge. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Target practice. I don't think Ujro would be bothered by it. No. Yeah, but that's why I think he would slip up. I think it's impossible for him to die. He could be turned though, right? Can he though? I don't know. I feel like it's more likely that he can be turned. Whereas Ujro would just see a zombie apocalypse and just think, ah, it's natural selection and process. So yeah, I got to go Ujro with this one. Maybe. Yeah. I want to say Ujro too. I want to see Ujro. That's too V1. All right. Let's go Ujro. All right. All right. We are at the top four. Semi. Semi-final. Semi-final. Can't you know versus Rudy? How the fuck did Rudy expect it? All right. Can't you know? And the category is best dinner party host. Fuck. I mean, okay, let's establish. Okay. Let's do this. First of all, I don't think both of them can cook. I don't think Rudy has never cooked, does he? Does he cook at any point? Probably guess his wife's cooking. Which one? He's that kind of guy. That's weird. What's the old ball of Jane up to? I feel like he's a traditional guy in that sense. You know? You're like too many cooks in the kitchen. All right. He would definitely be the guy popping off misogynistic jokes. You know? If you're like, my wife will bring that. Oh wait, which one? On the other hand. Happy wives. Happy lives. I'm all right. Whereas Kensho can cook. But he's never used like, you know. But he does it out of necessity for survival. You don't even know. You'd be like, what is this delectable meal Kensho? And he's like, oh, that's a human meat. I just don't think Kensho would want to enter town. I don't think he'd want to be a, I think Rudy has at least held dinners. Yeah. Whereas Kensho would be like, you are already full. You have eaten enough. You're the quinoa salad. We're in a post-apocalyptic world. Here's three beans. Eat it wisely. Ration it out. The vibes would be atrocious in the Kensho. Yeah. Yeah. Whereas at least with Rudius, he has a nice household. Very nice household. Sure. Why is Rudius winning? I don't, I hate it. I hate it, but I can't argue against it either. This is a win again for Rudius, not because Rudius is good at this. His opponent is so shit at this. Again. All right, fine. Give it a Rudius. Rudius wins again by doing nothing and being the worst person. All right. Let's see who's going to go up against Rudius. Tanjiro versus Yuzho. Best at defending a castle. Oh, like a ca, like a siege. Huh? I guess Tanjiro's good at attacking a castle. I mean, Tanjiro, I mean, he is good at attacking a castle. I mean, Tanjiro has experience. Yeah. He does have experience with castles. Whereas Yuzho can go up against an entire army. Yuzho, his tactic would be, I will, don't you fucking dare come close to this castle. And for most people, I think that would be enough. I think the United States would agree. Yeah. Yuzho can just stand at the top of the castle and just do that face, you know, show his face and be like, I ain't going in there. Do you think Tanjiro is capable of making a peace treaty with the U.S. and of making them agree not to attack him? Yeah. I feel like Tanjiro. I feel like Tanjiro, he's such a good boy. He's so unthreatening. But he would die to a gunshot. But he's, he's the goodest of boys, you know, he's the goodest of boys. I think you want a bad boy to defend your castle. Yeah. You want fucking, you need some fucking heat. Yeah. History has taught us that. Yeah. See, look, Tanjiro is good at attacking a castle, but that's a different story to defending a castle. You know, that's different, that's different battle tactics at play here. You know, you can't be, you can be good at one, but you can be shit at the other. You know, he's not much of a defender. He's more of an attacker. I guess so. I guess so. Whereas Yuzho can stand his ground. Let's go with Yuzho. Yuzho vs. Urudius. Literally the two scales of anime. All right. The final Urudius from Mushokitense vs. Hama Yuzho from Baki. The category is most likely to do well on a blind date. Oh, this is, this is a close one, I feel, but completely different reasons. I mean, they would both be horrible. They would be crap. Huh, well. I don't even think usual like respect anyone or women. I thought you were about to say women. I don't think usual respect women. I'm just gonna say that. But like he disrespects all genders equally. I think more so for women there. Whereas Rudius will be like, I mean, you can be my third wife if you want. Rudius would either like mention some weird shit about feet collection or he would be like, yeah, I've already got two wives. Rudius is definitely the guy to mention his EDE on the first date. Yeah, like both of them are equally fucking horrible. I just don't think any woman would willingly wanna, or man, because I know Ujuro has no qualms about that, would be willing to. But see, I'm trying to think here, right? Like yes, Ujuro is, has no respect against women and men just in general. But I'm thinking as well in terms of like looks as well, right? Like there's a lot of women out there who like the kind of stronger male in the relationship, you know, to protect and stuff like- He's a freaking freak though. He's a freak. He's too much. Yeah, but then you got fucking P. Diddy over here. Who's like, I don't know man. Lesser of two evils I would say. Bro, okay. But like, you know, let's bring- You sure like someone in the series? I mean, I wouldn't put a pause. Actually, no, yeah, he does. He does, he does in part four, I think. He's literally, this is like the worst. These two are the worst. The two worst humans- The two worst human beings going up against each other. Well, look, let's go with track record here. You know, let's go with track record. Are you gonna say, cause he is too wide. You piece of shit guys. Look, I'm just saying- You two could have two wives. I think he just doesn't see the value in marriage. Yeah, but you just killed his own wife. Oh shit, oh he did. He literally fucking murdered his own wife. To make room for another- That means he's free for the blind date. Single and ready to make your- It's that toy story theme, isn't it? I'm done. My God, the more we keep talking about these characters, the more they are just the worst. They are so bad. This is horrible. This is like, I'm in a match with the worst part of ever. Oh man. Well, shit. I'm trying to think, all right, I'm trying to think in terms of life. This is tough, man. Yeah. You saw me play this game. Yeah, yeah, I'm like, I need to stim now in order to think about this. This is horrible. Rudious. Okay, what is, what's the opening line? And I was, what's- The opening line to get them interested? Usually with opening line, he would go, ah yes, you're exactly what I asked for. That's what he would say. And then Rudious would say something. He would say something akin to like, mm, I've been watching you for a while. If you're ages on the clock. Like both, like both would be unquestionably horrible at dating. Yeah, usually it would be like time to eat. No, Rudious would just, he wouldn't even say anything. He would just be gawking at their tits probably. Um, well. Yeah, he should be the kind of guy that within the first 30 seconds of the mention how he jail broke his phone. So that it doesn't have to shut a sound anymore. All right, all right. You know, he like, it would just be like horrible conversation. I can't, this is genuinely impossible. Okay, let's break down this date like bit by bit to see if there is anything that differentiates them. Okay, first impression, both fucking horrible. All right, so equal in that. Are they both, how do they do the bill? Are they, are they taking the bill? Are they splitting the bill? You would just walk out. Yeah, he would walk out. He wouldn't even like, he wouldn't even like talk about the idea. He wouldn't even bring it up. He would just walk out. He'd be like, put it on the US government. And Rudy's like, oh, you know, I'm kind of unemployed right now. Jobless. Yeah, Rudeau would ask like you to cover this one. Yeah. Rudeus is definitely taking them to like, I hope. I'm sure. Danny, is like, do you like Danny's? It's all I can afford right now. Okay. Whereas at least, at least you, Joe, right? Even though he may not pay for the bill, he has, you know, he has a high standard. That means the bill is going to be higher, Joe. But at least he'll be, he'll be sophisticated enough to take her to like a nice restaurant. The good thing is that he's not making her pay. Yeah. Cause he's not making anyone. He's not making anyone pay. Nobody is paying. He's getting a free meal everywhere he goes. So that's at least one positive. Maybe you Joe, perhaps maybe more attractive. I don't even really think he is. You Joe would at least be nice enough. He's kind of old. Have you seen Rudy? Like at least like in like the latest season. He's like, no, no, no, he, he's, he has definitely turned into a gym bro. And he has definitely turned really, I haven't seen the latest. But the negative is that you have to take into account his OG body. No, no, no, no. He has definitely turned into a gym bro who listened to Andrew Tate. You know that, that, that, that is the kind of gym. Well, you get two wives. I mean, perhaps he's polygamy. Yeah. Rudy's been the kind of guy who would show him, like show the date like his favorite Joe Rogan episode. Did you watch this one? Oh my God. At what point do we just coin flip this? Fuck. I'm on alert. It's a lesser of two evils. I would say, is it? I've been trying to think of a lesser of two evils. But he has swooned and managed to get two wives. Although, you know, I don't think he did an exceptionally good job at doing that. I think it also helps that he was, he's fucking OP as shit. And I think they're more attracted to his powers. Occasionally, I don't know. Yeah. But in that case, the usual would come out on top. Also, you know, Rudius, you know, one of his wives, he kind of was teaching her from like when she was like five. So it's kind of hard to argue that you kind of struck up a first date situation with that one. Well, and with the other one, she was training him since she was like five. Well, I mean, Rudy has got laid almost four times. One time was a technicality where he dropped the ball, but it could have been four times. Yeah. That was like probably the most organic relationship. He kind of formed. Yeah. Like that was like the most normal one. Yeah. But he's marrying the the women with it. Not so much that. Who's the fourth woman? No, no, I'm saying you laid four times. Who's the fourth? Like. So there has been. So there was season one of then season. The reason I say almost four is because of the second time. Yeah. Yeah. OK. Now the second time, but he almost I forgot about the red head girl. Yeah. Yeah. Second time was he almost got laid, but his dick didn't want to give him to get. I think you do gets laid daily. You can get anyone. Will they enjoy it is a different question. I would use your own. He gets laid. It's not consensual. He's like the moment you agree to this day. I have the other hand. So frustrating because the more we talk about this, like the worse they both get. Yeah. But I think it's Rudy. What? No, I think it's usually. You sure? OK. Because usually again, we'll have at least the decency to take her on to like a nice restaurant and then go. It's staying like a nice hotel, not have to pay for the date. You know, all of that kind of stuff. Whereas Rudy is Rudy. Bro, Rudy's taking it. You know what? I'm not going to fight this one. You know, go. I think you do. I think you see at least cares about civil rights, which he does mention when he's a Muhammad Ali, which I think is somewhat attractive. All right. Well, there we go. You drew wins the tournament. Honestly, even if this was a standard death battle, I feel like you sure? Well, there's a possibility he could have made it all the way. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. But I didn't fucking. I don't believe he's made it to the final. How did Rudy is make it this far? Bro, RNG, man. RNG. The roll, the dice roll. Well, I don't know if you enjoyed this absolutely bizarre and weird death battle list. And if we should do this again with more characters, game characters or whatever in the future, maybe maybe the next one we can even ask the patrons to give their suggestions on characters and categories and categories as well. That could be fun. I feel like the categories made it fun. Oh, yeah, definitely. So, yeah, let us know if you guys agree or disagree down in the comments below. And hey, look at all these patrons. I'm sure you guys will be able to tell us who would have won in each of the categories. And if you are joining us over on the patron as well, then not only will you be able, will you be supporting us on videos like this, but you get patron exclusive weekly content. We have one that you guys can go check out right after this one. But if you want to check that out and support the boys in the process, head on over to patron.com slash trash tastes also falls on Twitter, send us to memes on the subreddit. And if you had a face listen to us on Spotify, this was a fucking chaotic. Yeah, we should. We definitely need to do this again. All right. See you guys next time. Bye. And use code start to try ship station free for 60 days.