E1130 - Summer House Finale/In The City Premiere, DeMari Talks Perfect Match & Danny Darko Does Drag

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They're amazing You also get a hundred and twenty night sleep trial and a limited lifetime warranty So there's a lot less pressure when making the investment go to helix sleep comm slash vi al For the best of web Memorial Day cell 27% off site wide exclusive for listeners of the vol files That's helix sleep comm slash vi al l for 27% off site wide Make sure to enter our show name at checkout so they know we sent you helix sleep comm slash vi al What's going on everybody welcome back to another exciting episode of the vol files reality recap edition I'm your host Nick joined by my wife. She's back day two of feeling not bad Bad we also have Sierra Robinson is back joining the household today Justin sweet boy Justin is also with us. Mary you online. Are you here? Can you don't let her sh megal? Now it's bad. That's crazy Mary's lost your voice I Love you feel better. Oh my god. She's trying anyways. Mary's down bad. She's staying at home She is apparently capable of working so she is listening taking notes But she can't speak but she is with us both in spirit and she's here kind of we have a jam-packed episode Lots to talk about like that was some of the best reality TV I watched last night with the the finale of summer house and the premiere of in the city I'm super into in the city. I don't I think it's so much better than the valley. I don't know maybe okay They have a bit of a cheat I think obviously with the all of this command and the interest behind it I think I as someone who's always loved the vibe I like I love a New York City centered show and I feel like in the city is really giving us like the chance like a reality sex in the city Type of vibe where we you know, I love the relationships that we get done pack I love like, you know, I think just you're talking about this summer house is more like singles and dating in The city is like obviously valley-based, but I know there's something about the I don't know the hustle and bustle of New York Also, I feel like with summer house, you know how they like list the jobs, you know Like West journalists and you got Kyle like CEO and even Amanda creative director like dirt and I think for the most part They're like Sierra nurse like these real jobs And I feel like in the valley they don't like I don't know what any of them do I know Jesse and Michelle do real estate. I know that I Was gonna say the exact same thing You were yeah, no I'm just like the thing with the valley is that it's like you're kind of like watching people like bebop around where it's like They kind of have no purpose where that was kind of my issue watching this season where I'm like wire Schwartz and Michelle getting together an assault room to talk about a trip to San Diego This just doesn't happen where I'm like New York It's like oh, they're at a bar and they're all talking about his like past dating life and like oh He brought this girl over from New York and it was just like they're all involved But they all like are like hard-working people that are like, all right. We're out We're we're you know getting the full debrief, you know that that was an amazing scene on in the city the grocery store scene between Amanda and Lindsay because it's you know, it's like that was like a real-life moment It seemed like they were literally grocery shopping Every everyone else every other one of these shows it's always like they're on a couch at home Or they're like at a bar having a drink like they're not like doing things There was something about them grocery shopping together and like a different type of scene that made it feel more like a Like it's almost like a scripted show in a way that or it's like let's go on a hike And then they stop as soon as they and they're like let's sit down on this bench Like let's finish our conversation and then we'll just go home. I don't know. I just I really loved that Oh, I thought it was great. I was so fucking locked in. No, that's a good point when she was like I need some fruit I was like, oh, I need some fruit too. That's right It kind of feels like they fit the filming schedule into their actual Yes versus their actual lives being fit into it. I noticed this too because recently Besalt Lake City a lot of people have been posting like the girls just like waiting in a lobby before the camera start with Like lights set up and it's like it breaks the mysticism But also it looks like they're waiting for the scene versus this looks like the camera showed up for the already pre-existing event Alright Lindsay and Amanda have 20 minutes. I guess we're doing this at the local bodega. Let's go. Yeah, also Just like shut up to Amanda and Kyle And I say that because like these people really like that thing, you know talking about 10 years and everything they've gone through and The the conversation they had where they separated like I don't know Maybe that's the first time they had the conversation. Maybe it's like they're on camera conversation But these are two people who clearly have committed their lives to this show and this audience in a way that is Authentic that you just don't see that I think with other really heartfelt deep Conversations and I just don't like these people aren't actors like and I think the way that they have shown up for our entertainment is Yeah, I feel like I was gonna say the When Amanda when they had released the statement and she comes over to the house and he's like Oh, you still have your key and then he's like you look really skinny. Are you eating? You know like that in that whole conversation that whole scene it did it felt very like I Shouldn't be listening to this, you know, like this is like a private conversation And I feel like I should leave the room But also I'm so locked in on like hearing everything that the two of you have to say because we usually see them at the house Up in the Hamptons and now we're in their apartment I know they've shown like a few time scenes like that But this felt like it really felt like a BTS in a way that was very And hearing Kyle be like watching summer house back It really seems like you had this emotional affair with him and her reaction that it's just it was wild What do you think Sierra? I agree like I was like it was it was interesting to watch because obviously like I have my own little like critical like where I'm like Breaking up or like confessing the truth to people where I'm like I think being able to say like like when she was having that Conversation with Kyle just kind of felt like she was sick She couldn't say the actual truth at the same time everything she was saying was truthful at the same time Does that make sense? Like two things can be true at the same time where I'm like you're admitting a lot But at the same time I do believe that you wanted things to work out I do believe that you're sad that this marriage ended the way that it did but I'm like I'm also like I I Don't know some of it was just like tough to watch so to your point Yeah, I do feel like I was like a part of a conversation We will certainly break down the dirty details of the episodes Of both episodes summer house in the city will also get into the valley. There's so much unpack We also have the new trailer for the reunion one of the most intense trailers. I mean that was I felt like I Was it was theater? It was Broadway. It was cinematic art Lots to get into but before we do we also have Damari from perfect match and great conversation with him He is caught up in a love affair with Marissa who if you remember was on love is blind and You know, I wonder what Marissa lover, you know what it's a dating show. She first She's like a tash of Damari and then she's like making out with some other guy at the mixer. She's I'm trying to I'm trying to figure out Marissa anyway, I think so as Damari We have a conversation with him to understand great guy I really enjoyed my time with him and he really seems like I really really became a fan more of a fan of him Having had a chance to talk with him and I'm excited for you guys to hear that interview before we get to the perfect match Conversation and Damari did you you guys sent me was it you Justin about which which Mormon wives have unfollowed or which ones followed? Jordan and Dakota which I would mostly roll my eyes at this type of Reporting in the in the weeds reporting But when it comes to this particularly group particular group of people and women They clearly use the follow and unfollow to communicate to each other and their audience I would usually roll my eyes at this type of stuff, but I do feel like this kind of like I it's hard not to Analyze why some of these women have unfollowed and some of them haven't So who is following? I Was gonna say Nick rolls his eyes. I'm over here. Like oh my god the amount of like energy I applauded the amount of energy it needs for people to like every day every second like check Who's like following who it's just too many people to track? Anyways, so who's still following Dakota and Jordan are? Jennifer black Mikaela and Miranda interesting Didn't see that coming. It appears Macy recently unfollowed them I just saw Jesse and Macy doing a like my ride or die reeled together and they were I Felt like her Macy and Mikaela Obviously last season were really tight triangle. I we saw Justin. I saw Jesse Macy Laila and Miranda at the the get out Hulu event and they all seemed Together and cohesive there wasn't there wasn't tension. They were you know, they all seem aligned so to speak It didn't seem like they were like it wasn't like a Jesse Like certainly and Miranda and Laila doesn't follow them, but Miranda does it would appear I'm like Mikaela I guess I kind of understand in the sense of feuding with Taylor that I guess maybe she has some sort of different Siding because I just remembered her and Jay saying the whole stuff with like there's more To the story or whatever when the whole Taylor story broke But I'm just kind of like but we've also heard Mikaela say time and time again I'm team the kids and if you're team the kids Then why not unfollow both of them, right? I mean you're definitely choosing a side Yeah, whatever is going on between you and Taylor Frankie Paul if you're Mikaela like to me There's not a question of whether like Dakota is problematic and if he's Done things to harm his family and obviously there's a lot of thoughts and feelings about Taylor Frankie Paul whether She is a victim of his actions and this is a negative response is terrible as it's been at times Or is she more of the you know, everyone can debate that but I just don't feel like amongst these women like I am surprised That they wouldn't want to distance themselves to Dakota and the fact that some of them still follow Dakota and Jordan they also very deliberate since they're like does it who I there's a lot of people I follow that I don't fuck with because I don't you know, I don't think I don't use the unfollow Miranda doesn't doesn't follow them anymore. So I don't know if that was oh, so that means I think that she gets she saw the post And someone's like yo and she it's kind of like a reminder It's kind of like when all the news broke about James Kennedy and Ali Luber and Nick and I got messages being like hey, why are you still following James and we were like, oh god Yeah, why are we like forgot all about that? Oops like he hasn't posted in a couple weeks So haven't seen him on my for you page, you know So sometimes it takes someone like so Miranda has since unfollowed so Mikaela also doesn't follow them anymore Okay, so Mikaela I'm going through this like I know checking so nobody follows the no one but many more Well looks like they might have like since all the what about Jen Affleck? That's what I'm checking right now Yeah, she's on a whole different show now. So I still not convinced she's on Orange County. I Am she bought a house in Newport? She's been living care for since dancing with the Stars I just I was told by a very Involved person with that show that Zach and I quote Zach fucked that up for her and she wasn't like Only the only I don't think they're separated and the only thing I don't think anything official Maybe I'm wrong, but the only thing that's come out is from Jen Affleck not anything from the show Hulu have commented on Jin's post being like woohoo love you girl or something like that. Jen does still follow both of them Okay, that's weird. Maybe she doesn't care. Maybe she's unplugged. I don't know Can I just have like one like random gripe about the OC spin-off? If only one of the women are Mormon like why couldn't we still have this franchise But just be like secret lives of influencer wives or secret lives That like why did we have to keep the Mormon of it all if they're if it's not going to be focused around the fact that they Do this mom talk plus being Mormon that is true It could be it like secret lives could be the thing that secret life see why There are a couple people that are Mormon or ex-mormon on the cast Which is the same as this current cast where some of them weren't currently practicing more Technically majority of them aren't wives You know well, they're not no I know but like real housewives of whatever like a lot of them are Yeah, the definition is like evolving right, but it's like even then real housewives of like when we just were changing the city But I'm like secret lives of Whatever but I'm just like I just don't think we need to keep the Mormon of it all if that's not really the central Do we technically know the official title of secret lives and Mormon lives orange? Because they've just been calling it OC Can't just call it OC the streets have been saying OC. Yeah, just OC like I don't Marissa and Ryan summer and set now you're right It's secret lives and women lives of orange County secret lives of orange County Which is the longest title to ever live so I do feel like it needs to be shortened SLMW OC It's the mom too much Sorry, it's just something that bothers me where I'm just like I feel like that franchise We would totally get that they're connected. It just we did the name if that's not the central focus I'm fine with watching a bunch of influencer podcasters Public figures being out and about and what their lives are like but like the Mormonism of it all just like doesn't need to be there Where it makes sense in Utah. I'm excited regardless. I I hear it's gonna be a great show. I'll watch it I said that about in the city. I was like, yeah, I'm not watching that and I'm like hooked In the city is amazing Sierra what are what is that catching your attention on perfect match? I think yeah, it's it's it's interesting I'm still getting sucked in you know Jimmy P being The man about town and like it's just it's just a very different Yeah, love is blind that I'm used to seeing Ali as a main character versus James's girlfriend Has been very interesting. It's also like Ali bringing the love island. Do you know me? Yeah? See and just like but like all over the place and like I love how much they're just kind of like drinking and having fun on this show Though I'm like they're literally just like oh, I don't know. I'm watching them talk. Oh Ali is so cute. I'm sorry her vocal son of hi Jimmy Jimmy We're going to like spy and then being that was a terrible idea And then waving at Jimmy. Oh my god So yeah, I'll you Ali and Jimmy are the are what's catching my eye But it's it's weird recognizing people from other shows and seeing like how they unfold in this light Does that Marisa to me is like a different version of Marisa Because she was so kind of like the straight character in there in her couple and it was from the military knows what she wants Yeah, and then this one is just like I'm jealous Yeah, so well she she claims to know what she wants and that was Damari and then she went to this mixer and fully Just was played truth or dare once and was dared to make out with Weston. She was like, all right. Guess I gotta do it It's truth. They're dare and then she then then she comes back. She's like, I gotta be honest with you This happened now. We're just gonna both forget it ever like she completely you can't be mad She processed it for him. Yeah, I have a question for the group If you're locking down first episode or early in the experiment are you treating this as a game rather treating it as finding Or perfect match and I'm referencing Marisa and Damari where it's like from day one. They're like, okay, cool We're together. Yeah, but then like now that they're kind of exploring other matches They're like, well, we'll just ignore that but like let's stay together Which to me gives and plotting to win right Marisa wasn't giving plotting to win for a TV show And then maybe it's just like good performing on her part, but I don't think that's it It was giving I'm obsessed with this man. Maybe just as soon as she walked in she was like, yep No, no, no. Yeah, Damari is the only one for me You know and she just was like, all right this if I'm gonna like be here This is my only the only person I mean that is a real thing because like when you are going on a love competition show What the expectation to like pair up with someone like I know like it's always hot people Like everyone has preferences and everyone has types and like they're usually you're just not into most people and yeah Usually the second someone opens their mouth. You're like yep, never mind You are hotter before you have like one Yeah, you're definitely like into maybe one person and you have to sleep next to them Like you have to share a room with these people. We have to sleep in the same bed But also like we voted Chris out because like we thought he was the one that was like treating this as a game I think Jimmy literally told us it's a game. I'm here to win Oh, it's like even Ali was like when Jimmy was talking to somebody else and she was like shit. I'm going home I'm going home. So I'm like there. I think it's very apparent that there is an element of that Like I might not find my husband here, but what is the prize? A trip trip with that person But do you remember last season last season we were rooting for a different couple and then just the random last couple got it Yeah, the people that paired up at the last minute. So, you know, I just then I don't really understand the The appeal I guess unless it's just TV time I just feel like it's not a show where you could be like you're not here for the right reasons Yeah, it doesn't apply to like the format. I feel like when people like I felt like this was the first season that people weren't really getting that Mad that the other person was yes making out at the mixer or doing whatever because it's like honestly like we weren't it wasn't you know what I You know so many of these shows perfect match Bachelor in Paradise in the recent season have clearly tried to take from Love Island and what has worked for them, right? But I think the thing that they seem to be missing the most is the soundtrack. I think that's what makes Love Island So visceral and so like I don't know what it is last summer like so many reasons why I can't wait for Love Island But the soundtrack like I would I would listen that shit all the fucking time. There's some good jams on there They're finding new tunes and there's like and then when you're listening to it You were it connects you with what you watched and it's like the music that like some of the you know, it's mostly it's royalty-free It's generic and it is just not the same is like a hidden gem like it's like remember when I think it was love is mine I think it was Jimmy P, but when they used man child. No, it was Jimmy P. It wasn't oh my god What was it was the most recent season? Who was it? It was the guy that's he what he left the the fitting oh Oh, oh, oh, um the one with the nomad the nomad who said the pilates thing. What's Joe? It was Joe Joe was the one that walked away with the man Oh, right. Okay. Yeah, love is mine But like they I remember they used that Man child's Rena carpenter on like his exit It was like the last five seconds of the show and everyone was like Netflix spent their bag to get that song and it was so I don't know what this shit cost and like I don't know what Love Island is paying to do this But I really think that is because like why when you watch like what when you're watching perfect match versus Love Island I mean, you know really what is the fucking difference? So why are the competitions on? Love Island so like Fun and so like you're so like like locked in and I really think it's like the music that Hightens it up. There is something about that these songs that we connect with or even if you haven't heard them There's like there's a difference between like great music that's produced by like, you know It's like when you have talented people versus like royalty free Yeah, when you see someone's Instagram ad on Instagram and it's like a real and you can obviously they had to use royalty free music Cuz the brand wasn't gonna pay and it like just doesn't hit the same And I'm just curious when you're make when you're producing these shows obviously budgets are involved But like I really I really think that's part of the secret sauce of Love Island It is but by the way, I went back and try to watch there's one specific scene of when Kayla Because I that scene specifically to me always just like hit me so hard I remember recording it on my phone and then I went back to watch it on peacock and I was like, what is this music? I was like, this is not what I remember like so I think they have they pay for like a certain period and then even the main song if you go back and watch like the main theme song I don't think it's the same for like season six or whatever it was I also wonder because it's dreamed on peacock and it's maybe yeah Warner You know universal and universal and universal music group that I'm like I wonder if they get those songs like for a specific time and then they have to change it But yeah, I mean it makes the difference because you watch it you're like wow this emotional like song just like hits Yeah, because like you're just I just always wonder why sometimes it doesn't hit quite the same Anyway, we got a great conversation with Damari coming up next and you will definitely Enjoy this conversation he gets into all the things that are going on with him in the perfect match house With Marissa, then he had his ex-girlfriend show up and that was a wild conversation He answers all our questions and then coming out of that conversation We are gonna get into all things summer house in the city the valley so much to break down It was just wild television So many Easter eggs to discuss and we will do it coming out of tomorrow Well before we get to tomorrow, don't forget to sign up for vile files plus where all of our files episodes are ad free Also, you get a reality recap deep dive we dive deep into all your favorite reality TV topics or pop extra roundup Or we talk about our favorite pop culture topics going on in the zeitgeist of pop culture and your update specials all your favorite updates for Your ass nick episode so be sure to check that out. 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You'll be glad that you did Let's get to tomorrow Well anytime I'm up at the lake I'm always trying to be cozy and comfortable and wear quality clothes and Mack Weldon is a big part of my lake closet line-up pretty much I have Mack Weldon wherever I go because Mack Weldon makes classic pieces that are easy to wear and easy to style Nothing flashy just clean sharp basics that work for real life the materials are insanely comfortable But still structured enough that you actually feel dressed one of my favorites are there stretch twill Tino and button-ups that are perfect for balance It's a really great casual outfit that's dressed up a little bit anytime you go to like, you know All the parents out there all those award ceremonies at the school perfect Mack Weldon stuff I know some of the dads out there aren't not trying to get flashy But you can still look nice and comfortable in Mack Weldon It's the kind of clothing that works whether you're running errands traveling grabbing dinner or just hanging out You don't really have to think about it. 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It looks great in any home gym What I like it again is like it just it helps me stay like doing new things, right? I've always used to be doing the same workouts and I was like as I get older I'm getting less range of motion. It's helping me again age more gracefully to be honest right now Tonal is offering our listeners 200 dollars off your tonal purchase with promo code Vi al that is tonal.com and use promo code vi al for 200 dollars off your purchase That's tonal.com promo code vi al for 200 dollars off Damari, welcome to show up. What's up guys? I just want to tell everyone who's listening He's is good-looking in person. Oh my god You're very handsome, man. Thank you, man. I'm very tall six five six five made my husband look very short six two I think sometimes on screen. I don't look as tall as I know it does Well, that's the thing about reality tv in general is that they cast tall men like in reality tv world six two is is mid It's it's it's average jimmy was uh jimmy Personal he was like brah I'm like six foot He definitely did look very small In stature and size like everything he looked small because like I mean you got jimmy sodos who's a uh six four basketball player, Ohio State me Yeyman also jacked even chris chris is kind of jacked too. Yeah, he's not a small guy The only thing chris used to do in the morning. He first of all he'd be shaving all morning because he gets like He's got that five o'clock He's a hairy dude, so he'd be shaving all morning and then he would be doing like these like banded bars Oh my god. What somebody told you about that? No, we watch it on this show It's like they did a whole montage of uh, yeah He kept leaving like one of the mixers or whatever to like go and do a couple more curls in the room. I mean Crazy, I said this is love about chris because I don't know chris was on our show age of attraction So we got to know chris. Well, that's my guy. I like chris. He's a fun guy. He does this and I say this was love I think some of quick chris's quirks comes from a place of insecurity as a as a lot of ours Is a lot. Thank you. Is a lot of ours. Me too girls, but he does it in a way that's So silly and so goofy, but you're just like, well, maybe you want a toxic, you know But it's like uh, he's like he he ha ha here's a purse It's like the flag is red, but you're like this is so cute Like I like the red red Yeah, it's a cute. It's a good shape. I guess if you like fluorescent stuff, but yeah You came into perfect match and you were a hot commodity You were definitely like a lot of the women had their eyes on you And you locked in with marissa, right? Very quickly or Or you could say marissa locked in with you. Well, she did whisper to you if you don't choose me. I'll fucking kill you You oh, okay, we got it. We got it He's like, oh god you heard okay He's like, I thought I was gonna die No, before we say anything else we we love marissa. We we've had the pleasure of interviewing her We have met marissa in person. She is a lovely person. We also love her mom for standing up for her I love this blind Her mom I believe if my memory serves is a Has has served for our country. She has both of them as yes as well as marissa So there is a certain level of grit Behind there and and and I don't think we quite saw that because I love his blind We saw marissa. I forgot what his name was but we all hated him Ramzes Yeah, the guy who like weirdly was pressuring her. Yeah, that's right. He was pressuring him Like and so then we see now we see marissa was a completely different man you this kind of you bring in a great energy As well, you're you're you're a giant man, but also a soft soul and I I've known you for 30 seconds It was interesting to see marissa as I described to allison when we had a pleasure of of interviewing interviewing her that she was bringing Don't ever leave me because I'll find you energy from from wedding crashers. How was it in the house with marissa? Yeah, how did your relationship start and it did seem to kind of get a little argumentative and toxic fairly quickly And you seemed a little uncomfortable with that. Yeah, um, I've been through these things before man I don't really like i'm not a toxic guy I am a person that if I have an issue I can talk it out I was very attracted to marissa at first when I first came in there She was probably her and allison because allison came in with marissa. I believe they were both very attractive to me So I was like, okay. All right. Well, I can see what's up with either one of them And then me and marissa just clicked naturally even like right at the beginning with little mixer Everybody was kissing each other. It's a lot of kissing everybody in this show man. I feel kind of disgusting I'm not Stop being a germaphobe for a second. So I'll give X a story It is different though. You have to make out with a lot of people at once. It really takes the love out of it 10 people. Yeah. Yeah down in like it had to be like 20 minutes 10 people. Oh my god. I was like drinking mouthwash No, because by the 10th person you're getting like that after kiss taste Yeah, especially if somebody else isn't handling doing their part of like the mouthwash or mints or gum or something We got it. Yeah, you're all professionals. You got a lot of white wine breath Yuck you think white wine's worse than red in my experience The sadness you just had I'll see you like reminiscing over there something's well. Well. Well. Well, I learned this lesson In my first time on tv don't drink red wine because there I I did a confessional and I was like nick I had rotten teeth. There was all stained red. I never thought about it. Anyway, I digress It's gross either way. Um, so you were making out with everyone. Yeah making out with everyone. Um, that was not that was fun But it wasn't at the same time. But um, anyway, me and Marissa, we did have a really good connection I felt like we were clicking really fast and maybe that's why it got so Like a little argumentative and like toxic and we would talk through it Obviously, like it would be stuff where it's off camera and stuff and then we would be back good And then the next time another challenge hits something or somebody else comes in it's like boom right back to it And I don't I don't have an issue with really being like an insecure person. I'm very solid and in myself Uh, especially to the surface like you're not gonna be able to really find that out until you like get to know more things I think that sometimes The threat of the looming possibility of somebody else coming in Like interrupting or taking me from the situation or even just going on a date sometimes would be a little hard And you know, and it was what was cool about I guess watching you and marissa Is because I think a lot of people watching it could relate to their own relationships because like, you know Sometimes those arguments with couples it comes again. It comes from a place of insecurity You can feel it and you want to calm your partner down But at the same time you want to you want someone to kind of meet you at your level And and and trying to find that balance must be very difficult When even though it might feel like you've known each other forever You don't you don't really know in the environment. So how did you juggle both feeling this connection with marissa? versus Maybe some of these little red flags that kept popping up. Well, let me ask you how did it look like I juggled it pretty well Pretty well. Yeah, okay. All right. It didn't feel like I did it felt like sometimes I was a little bit too Far in the path of like, you know, we can just fix this instead of it being like I'm actually trying to cater to the situation or like what you're feeling in the moment And I think sometimes that's more important. Yeah, and uh, that's something that I learned about myself is just being a man I'm like, I'm solution based first like we can just I'm not leaving like it's cool. You know what I mean? Like I just want to go have a conversation or This person wants to take me on a date. Why not? You know, what are we here for? Yeah, you are on perfect match We're on perfect match. You're trying to find your perfect match. Exactly. I can't do that if it's like The match that I'm with isn't even like we'll talk about it and be like, yeah, it's cool. Somebody comes in Go do what you want to do if you want to go on a date. That's fine We're locked in right now. But if you want to go do that, I'm not going to tell you no But then somebody comes in it's like End of the world. Yeah World war three every time it's like bro. I What am I going to do? I want to go in sequential order here. Uh, when you eliminated chris, uh for As they say being the most insincere or less sincere. What what? First of all, I thought you made the right decision. Okay But how did you guys come to that decision? To eliminate chris over jimmy because it ultimately was your it was It was ultimately me at the end that had to say, you know what chris like is I think yeah, I think it's you but I didn't know any background so For me, I'm just seeing chris is like this guy that we were talking about he's like I hate to put these words, bro But like this is the best way I can say it is like a little love by me like first it's very forward He's knowing what he wants immediately. So That's all I'm seeing. Okay. He came in kiss mckinsey. They went to bed at like six So I'm like, okay, maybe this is really what he wants, right? And then kala came in and they Really connected immediately But they're like, bro, you aren't trying at all. You haven't even spoken to anyone else had a conversation with anyone else And once she was like mercer was like demarii like think look at the situation I'm like, well at least jimmy's been talking to everybody. He's gonna try to at least figure it out so Man, that was a hard one. Like I don't know if you can see I was stressed I'm not Really, I don't even remember that. That's crazy. But do you feel like even though marissa was really Going hard for jimmy. Which makes sense. Her love is blind. Yeah. Yeah. That's her boy. But like do you feel like it was Truly your decision or do you feel like it was marissa's decision through you? It was marissa's decision through me for sure. Um, when I thought back on it when I was sitting there I'm like, that's the best decision to make honestly She did make the right she made the right decision Like I'm not too stubborn to be like, okay Maybe I'm wrong here or just listen to my partner in the situation. Sometimes they know like do you think that you would have Explored any sort of path with kathryn had you and marissa not been so locked in me and kathryn are so close as like friends that That's such uncharted Water's uncharted territory that I don't I don't know if that would even work Honestly, but I would have if me and marissa weren't locked in or like I she came in second or whatever I probably I would have picked kathryn to stay at least it's for her to be able to have an experience and figure out who she's Do you think that's kind of kathryn's uh, let's say kryptonite where she seems I mean, she's obviously a beautiful person Beautiful, but she also kind of comes in and by her own definition is like weird and goofy And do you feel like she reads is everyone's like pal and friend and almost like takes herself off the table In a like a romantic way because it was surprising to see her having a hard time Kind of really connect with any guy there. I don't know. I don't think it's her fault. I think these dudes were scared man Like she's she's too attractive like when she came in it was like Everybody's looking like oh hell no, I need to like guard my man. You know what I mean? So she came in and everybody's timid a little bit because they're like, yo like my girl We're already talking about like basically like I can't leave So in kathryn's a smoke show so it's it's tough for you to Not pick her if you're somebody that is actually like on the list or like she's fond you attractive Who would you have picked if you and marisa weren't so locked in kala? Really? Yeah. Yeah. So was that a bummer to see her be sent home? Like was that gonna be an option for you or were you we didn't even me and kala had just like barely had any type of Conversation because she saw how marisa was as well. Um, but we also were just like talking shit to each other So she walks in she tells me she's from portland and i'm like And she's like the fuck he's like where you from I said indian napple. She said Yeah, we had a really good banter and I think that just made us kind of notice me like, hmm. Is there anything? I don't know and then uh I know you guys saw the Mixer and then we got to have a conversation there speaking of the mixer. Um, I was a bit surprised that marisa After like really locking you down And setting your boundaries and and really like letting you know how you're supposed to move Kind of leaned into like, you know with the mixer. It's always like hey, we're playing spin the bottle We're playing truest or dare like these kid games, which you know, I get it's a tv show Right, but it's always hilarious how everyone in these groups are like, oh, well, I guess we're playing spin the bottle I guess we're just kissing everybody. My decisions aren't my own You know what am I supposed to do? Oh my god, i'm not playing the game And I was like, yo marisa like you're like you're you're up Mari's ass like let telling him how he's supposed to move and like the first chance you get you And then she was very upfront about it. She she told you right away, but it was she was kind of so submissive I was like, oh, yeah, just kidding. Of how she moved Did you feel like I'd not to use the word no, I hit the using buzzwords But like since it's 2026 did you feel a little gaslit in that moment where you're like almost where you're like Did you want to say something or did you want to like ask more questions about that? But like it seemed like she bows through that confession in a way where you were like Yeah, I you know, well it was a game. It was anyways. I'm sorry. This was the moment where she was like she got very upset She kind of started talking about like her trauma response and how she feels Uh abandoned at you know, like it kind of got into like that sort of territory um, so yeah, what was I think the space just exposed a lot of Small things that you don't really get to see in two weeks three weeks she uh To go back to your question first, um I think for me I wasn't actually tripping or doing anything in the games because Had my mixer not went how it went if my X wasn't in there or even if she was I would have been kissing people too. Like it is what it is I mean, we're here to have a good time. It's cool. So I wouldn't have been kissing people on the side now That is interesting. That's too far. I feel like now if you're doing it in the game Spin the bottle whatever it lands on you and another person y'all kiss whatever But if it's like too much, obviously, I'm gonna get to see but I wasn't really upset with that because We kind of talked about it a little like well if something happens in there and on that way if it happens I'll saw it to the game and that's a different story. Okay I don't know. This is not my girlfriend. Like I can't be mad at you for doing something. Yeah, you're not my girlfriend Yeah, you're like partner. We're also arguing all the time. It's like, yeah, what were you guys arguing about so much? Oh my god, I don't know. Even in that I was so confused. I'm like, where is this coming from? Why are we always arguing and um I think I just pick really spicy women, man I think I think my calmness. Well, I was just gonna ask that. Yeah Invitation. Yeah. Do you feel like you seem grounded? You feel you very calm in control of your emotions and have you found that maybe some of the people you've dated almost that Yeah, it brings up like if you don't pick me. I'll kill you. Yeah, kind of thing like why are you so calm tomorrow? Right. That should have been like red flag. Let me get away from this. I'm like Interesting. No, I get it. I get it. Oh, she has an opinion. The danger. What was it like? Were you how shocked were you to see brie? Come in or did you kind of anticipate that might happen? I anticipated that it might Because we don't have we didn't have a um Like a button to our relationship. Nothing ended it. Um in terms of reality tv So I was like, I don't know if they would be that messy, but then I'm like, this is reality tv The goal is to be messy, you know, so um, I'm like, I don't know. Maybe she'll be here Maybe she won't but when I walked in and all 10 people came in and she wasn't in there. I was like Oh, you know, I had big sigh relief, but um, when I saw her that was Interesting because we won the first challenge and I see her on the board and I'm like, she's not getting in here Not on my watch. I was Well, why would I let you in here? Yeah, you gotta have to figure it out another way At the singles like when she walked in you're so funny on camera. Yeah, what do you mean by that? She said she said you're so funny. I don't know how it's been for you guys If you ever just seen an x in passing And you're like, oh, I know what I'm gonna do and I see this person, you know, I'm I know I'm react. I'm cool Like you said, I'm calm collected. I got this right A hug. We hadn't even like we were not on good terms at all and uh for me to be like Just trying to extend the olive branch without actually saying anything or having a conversation at all because we hadn't spoke Since we ended things in uh, february of last year So it uh, that was that was That was funny of me to do It was very funny and it it seemed like just reading the tea leaves of your conversation Ultimately the demise of your relationship was like this kind of lack of communication or it was kind of almost like It seemed a lot like your relationship with marissa where it almost felt like you were constantly on your heels But you never really understood Why you were always having to defend yourself. Where do you think that comes from? Damn, you almost stumped me there. I don't I don't I don't know exactly. I think for me I'm the type of person that is very communicative until I'm not Until it's like I keep saying something. I keep telling you, please stop doing this. Please stop doing that I don't want to be spoken to like that. Um, don't accuse me of these things I'm here for you. I got you. Don't worry until it keeps happening. It's like I'm gonna tell you I need you to work on this as well I need you to help me with this But at the same time like I don't want to sound like a victim because I'm also like Just as calm as I am the the trigger is good. Like I I still can flip it around and be like, yo I'm not going for that right now. Yeah, you know, I didn't establish that part quick early enough for it to be like, hey, we're not doing that and sometimes that Instead of that I would just close off And I think that's a part of my problem after a while not immediately when she was like, you know She's coming at you. She's coming at you. She's like having said all that. I still love you Like whoa But you you were like, I love you too. Now I I imagine you meant it as like I have love for you I have love for you. Yeah, I have love for you Yes, okay. Yes, did she take it that way? I don't know. Okay. Um, we didn't really have that conversation Well, I hope she did that one. I hope you never saw each other. It was y'all were making out right and you was you Put some extra into some work. Yeah, I'll make sure I know who that was like and I still love you and then you're like and I'm gonna give you the best kiss I've ever given you right now. Yep. Yep. I'm an asshole, man Yeah, you just gave me hell. Yeah, I'm gonna give it right back to you So that's what I'm saying is is that do you feel like you felt more understood by her? Like did that conversation was it productive at all? For where we were absolutely, okay I didn't leave from that conversation feeling great at all. It's a lot that happened off of camera And um, I left from that conversation feeling terrible And then I went back had another terrible conversation So it uh, that night was just a lot for me. Was that because you were feeling attacked? Yeah, very much so there were things that were talked about that Shouldn't have ever been talked about on camera in that way and uh, like like family stuff And uh, I really didn't appreciate that and they had been talked about in other spaces as well and It just didn't sit with me correct because I would never do that to somebody. Yeah That put me in a very bad space mentally there. So it was pretty productive in the sense of us At least having a conversation and me saying to her like I just didn't want to like do this anymore. It was never like I'm Cheating or I'm doing anything that's Bad to you. I can't do this anymore because we aren't seeing God. I 98% of the times great times and we're like when we were good Amazing cloud nine when we were bad. Oh my god, like Yeah, like we don't even speak for a day or a day and a half or something like that It was not fun not because of me. I'm trying to resolve it I think she talked about breaking up after her grandmother's funeral, right? And then she saw you at an event And you were like flirting with every girl possible there What is your recollection of that event? I did not start to flirt until she left by the way so But but I had but I had conversations with people and I think In that space that we were in She didn't want to see me talking to the women, you know Sounds a little familiar, huh? But we were uh, we were out and it was a nicks event And I had got her invited there and before I ever got invited before that she had um Put somebody else on the rsvp list because I had something to do earlier in the day So she was thinking maybe I couldn't make it But the other person still invited me so I went it was my friend that invited me and her there And uh, yeah, I was I wasn't flirting until she left but people did Um contact her and be like, oh, is that your man? Like was he outside doing like he's talking to girls and all this stuff So I understood I got where she was frustrated in that moment Now what happened after I wasn't too excited about but yeah, what happened after she just went online and was like Immediately to the story immediately to her uh tiktok immediately doing all this stuff Just to try to make it look like I was kind of coming at your character. Yeah Yeah, you know as men in 2026. I think we're all becoming more, you know Aware of how we come across and how we speak in relationships and do you ever like you're a big guy? You seem like you were and this is a good in a good way like really hyper aware of I don't know how can I say this but like I think sometimes in reality TV men aren't getting given the benefit of the doubt You know, it's a generally a woman audience And do you do you are you aware of that? Are you feeling that because it feels like you are or is that just how you are in life where You you you are very calm But I think you're you seem careful with your words knowing that your words potentially are in like it seems like sometimes in these Situations with these arguments you are having with the people you were matched with And it seemed like they care about you but almost like they wanted to attack you To get you off your toes, but you really never seem to Buy like take the bait and have you learned that lesson in life? Like I imagine you've had the one that the hard way over the years absolutely like growing up as a First of all, I've always been a big like I was a big kid So I understand the space that I take up. I'm six five and 240 pounds like I'm like Bree is five foot one Oh five, okay, you know what I mean? Like I can't do too much to this situation especially not like yelling or physically or anything like that because like What are you doing? Like this doesn't even it doesn't actually suit or help at all But like you're saying I understand the space that I take up but I also am very careful with my words because of Like I had anger issues as a child um, I grew up in environments that weren't maybe suitable for A kid and had to grow up really quickly and had to deal with a lot of different Emotional spaces and death and all those things. So it made me Into a person that when I'm speaking these words, I know how powerful my tongue is and I don't want to say something to you that is definite because It can be you know, yeah, you seem like a really good guy, man. Thank you man. Appreciate it. I try I mean, I'm I fall I do things wrong as well when you're all human Yeah, but it's like, you know, I think and I and I talk about there's just so many bad examples of Of men on tv. Uh, so it's always good to see someone like yourself who Again, I think sometimes there's always is the excuse of letting our emotions get the best of us But you you you've seen you on the show. You're an example of someone who can feel triggered You know get attacked but still like take a pause Before you speak in a way that like you said you're aware of your space You're you're aware of how you can come across and You've gotten to the point in your life where you're not using that as an excuse anymore You are you are just owning who you are and how people see you Uh, and then moving forward, which I think is just a great example of of a maturity and you know and and getting older And it's just it's just really cool to see because we don't especially I'm like too hot to handle in perfect match We're just never right. It's usually just the exact opposite and then we lean into our messages Um, so it's it's it's really cool to see man Thank you. I appreciate it. It's um, it was hard to navigate it sometimes just because of the space that we're in and Especially like I don't know you really like you don't know me. You don't know what actually triggers me unless I tell you I don't know what triggers you unless you tell me So were y'all having those deep conversations? Maybe at night or off camera? Yeah, we really did I think that allowed me and marissa to Actually be able to navigate that a little a little bit better Where I may fall short in some of those moments and she can tell me actually in the moment like I don't like that Don't do that or I can be like, oh Please stop talking over me like there's this is there's no way I can have a conversation with you If you're going to continue to talk over me or not even let me finish my statement Because the point was right here. Yeah, there was that part where you're like you keep interrupting me and I haven't It you know, I'm I'm being quiet. I'm just like when you guys are talking. I'm sitting here. I'm looking at you Allowing you to speak That's a great problem to have though because you guys like actually value each other's You know, like you value value each other's space you value Yeah, and as I will say as someone who like yourself Early in my dating life Enjoyed the company of a spicy woman um often would turn into Conflict that I was just like, well, what's what's going on? What are we fighting about and it was fun. We were watching it Nellie pointed out that she She doesn't do that. Uh, granted when when you're in it. Yeah You're fine. Yeah, but as someone You know, I don't know where you're in your love journey. I don't know how it ends. Maybe you're with marissa. Maybe you know, maybe you're not It is possible to find a strong spicy You know confident woman who isn't always argumentative and and and is comfortable in their skin And there is and it took me a lifetime to find it. I I think I'm a lot older than you Uh, but you can I'm 45 Um, sorry, sorry But yeah, yeah, it is possible and it took it literally took me a lifetime to to figure that out Because I was always drawn to the I like the pushback. I like to be challenged. I like to You know, I'm not doing things to like just have me put in my place But I like to know that I want to find my equal and to find your equal sometimes I've made the mistake of Finding that argumentative person. It's a little too far. Yeah, the balance is off. Yeah, my mom is a spicy lady You know what I mean? Like she's not going for it. So like I think naturally It's just really all the women in my family. They ain't going for it. I've never met like a real passive woman in my life You know, so for me I That's probably why that's probably one of those reasons why I end up like Chasing those types of things and as my mom has gotten though that she's become a lot more calm and uh, and like That has helped as well to see like oh, yeah, okay Or even just my experiences with women and being in relationships where I'm like, oh, you're not spicy enough Like I need a little bit more. I feel like I can do whatever I want to here I don't want to feel like I can't do anything but I don't want to feel I can just get away with anything you got to not be going for that for me That's that's a real big thing like because I'm not I'm not like a little jealousy a little Not jealousy, but like someone who's going to tell you exactly what that you want to be boss around a little bit I want you to you. I want you to know what you want. Yeah, I want you to know what you don't want as well It's like I want someone who's very clear with their expectations of me But it's consistent with those expectations because sometimes it's it's not yeah, you're like what? Huh? I I did what the thing you told me to do and why is it you know And then when it's not consistent, it feels like it's just argumentative for the sake of being argumentative And that's where I would get lost and I found myself in you a little bit watching it. Thank you What's your biggest relationship ick relationship ick my biggest ick in the in the world period I don't like when people Like when they when they chew and they chew with their mouth open. That's like my biggest thing That date is not going to go well the rest of the time if you like Open People is like but um relationship ick if it's too early and you're like Like babe, baby All that like the the too sweet talk You don't like pet names early on I just don't like baby talk period I just don't like baby. You don't like it at all baby talk like not like baby talk But like like people call you baby. Oh, I like the pet name early No, like yeah, like it's kind of weird. It's like so you're doing that to everybody wait to know me Yeah, and what world am I your babe yet? That's not we're not there Yeah, or even like a love bomber to love love too early like somebody saying I love you too early That really bothers me. You're insane. Yeah, I agree hard agree. Yeah, I feel like you've gotten that a lot I I don't like it. I don't like it. They're not trying to lock him down I've uh ended some some situations ships because of that a few times. I don't like Yes, we got cut throat. I don't like it man. It's not cool. It's not cool because you don't you don't because I feel like love is so Almost not exactly unconditional, but it's there. It's right on that line How the fuck you know that after two months and you don't know that Unconditional Into months. That's crazy. I really really really like you and really enjoy the way you make me feel and like spending time around you But that's a different day. That's completely different. Yeah, I do that as well. I like that as well when you're not making good tv What are you doing? Uh, what do you do for like work? What what is modeling acting and I make music as well. Okay, cool. Yeah. Yeah, yeah What kind of music uh rap? Nice. Yeah, I got to wrap a little bit on two out the handle. Okay. Yeah Uh, what would be your dream acting role? Hitch Okay, a modern day Yeah, I absolutely love will smith. Um, so I would play any role that will smith has played even while while west I know it gave up the matrix for that He could have been neal ever mind actually Who's your dream feature? Oh dream feature Okay, we'll just go with my favorite artist j Cole j Cole You hear that j Cole j Cole or Alicia keys Yeah, that'd be fire Well demar it's been a fun fun time getting to know you. Uh, I wish you the best luck the rest of the way Um, whether it's you and marissa happy for you too. If that's how it happens It's fun to see men like yourself represent Men on tv in a way that we don't always don't get to see so, uh, I appreciate you and uh, thanks for coming on Thank you brother. Thank you guys for having me. Thank you You A quick message from today's sponsor the aspca pet health insurance program at a certain point your pet becomes family And you would do anything for them, but sometimes those late night accidents and I mean by accidents I mean your dog might eat something they shouldn't and sometimes that can be a little scary And when that happens you don't want to be worried about vet bills or how much it's going to cost you You just want to be worried about the dog that you love and that's where the aspca pet health insurance program Comes in to save the day the program offers customizable accident and illness plans making it easier To get the pet care that they may need you can tailor your plan to fit your budget your lifestyle and your pet's particular quirks Because vet bills never show up when it's convenient can't say enough of great things about the aspca certainly early in their life jeff and steve got into some things that required us to go to the Uh, a dog emergency hospital like late at night always scary stuff But the last thing we wanted to worry about is the uh, the high bills that it really costs and thank god We had the aspca to help us get through those scary times when you enroll in the aspca pet health insurance plan You could get a 25 amazon gift card. It's a little treat for you while doing something great for your pet Anything that helps remove stress in unexpected pet moments is worth it because when something feels off with your pet You don't want to overthink every decision You just want to focus on getting them the care that they need to explore coverage visit aspca pet insurance dot com slash vi all that is aspca pet insurance dot com slash vi all eligibility restrictions apply visit aspca pet insurance dot com slash amazon terms for more info this is a paid advertisement insurance is underwritten by either independence American insurance company or united states fire insurance company and produced by pts insurance agency limited the aspca is not an Insurer and is not engaged in the business of insurance We have this beautiful really cute quaint Screened in porch sunroom vibe at the lake and i've been trying to figure out how I can Furnish it and decorate it because it's kind of an awkward small space and I was like trying to find all these pieces And it was too much and I was like, you know what? I'm just gonna go to wayfair because I know I can find the exact piece that i'm looking for in the exact dimensions And you know what I did I found a beautiful couch Matching coffee table and now what a great guy Very kind very tall. He is very kind. Yeah, I always say when people walk in the room and address everybody around them Like he did that. Yeah, he's a catch. Yeah, it's understandable Why marisa was like if you don't match with me, I'll fucking kill you the first five seconds. They saw each other We would all do it Well, danny, uh, darko is I'm so confused You know like it's also frustrating that You know janet is gonna feel vindicated. I tried to say like even to my friend She was like, I guess janet was right and I was like, well, maybe jasmine. I don't know So I'm the jasmine. I think it was just the janet and interjected herself in a situation that she wasn't Involved in and made it about her. So that's why she was annoying for that But it is like yeah, you are semi validated because uh danny's behavior is I think with janet for me it comes like I just it doesn't feel like she has Good intentions for people. I don't feel like when she is calling anyone out. It's coming from a place of Yo, like hey, I don't think you should act this way She has been accused multiple times of like digging up dirt on people and all I have to say is if that's true I just think that's one of the most deplorable things anyone in reality v can do for to weaponize your past or mistakes that you've made especially if you have tried to like Write your wrongs and do your work and if if if janet is actually doing that if she is just constantly going on reddit And reading rumors about people whether true or not and then throwing it in their face at that It's most convenient time. Maybe she's not doing it. She hasn't fully she hasn't really denied it And so like whether she's right or or wrong about danny I think that's the thing that's hard to digest when it comes to janet because I think that's just really Cruel behavior if that has happened I think she had the right intentions But went about it the wrong way and that's why last season people were like, why are you budding into this? But this season they're like, okay, like we've all now experienced this and seen it But even the conversation she had with lacy where lacy was like, I don't appreciate the mean girl behavior You said you read on reddit that I auditioned and made fun of me for auditioning for real house But then she did her itm her confessional and said I did audition for the house wise She did but I'm like, why is that something to make fun of janet? Just because lacy wasn't hurt by that and she only did doesn't mean that janet's intention wasn't to try to hurt her And that's the thing is janet is trying to hurt people to make herself if if that's what's happening Yeah, and by the way, I love lacy but I did Giggle when she was like I did try out for it and also I'm like you did send the cease and desist I'm like janet wasn't lying with that stuff, but she did go about it in a way that I was like you didn't have to bring that up Exactly. Yeah, I do like lacy. I like maw, but I do like I like lacy being like apologize. I hated that That was awful That was the most annoying if nick and I are ever in a public setting with a bunch of people and he thinks I did something wrong You better pull me aside You better get in the car with me when we are alone and be like call that person later the way that she's like Apologize right now apologize right now. It felt like she's talking to her toddler Who just threw a block and hit somebody in the head and like not her partner who she sees as her equal it felt so You just so you just nailed it. You just nailed it on the head. That's why this is an interesting relationship to watch She does not like him. No, she likes just like it's just She like I think they like each other. Okay. Well, it's he breathes wrong They're not even married and he breathes wrong and she's like, oh you pissed me off figure it out I think it's a little performing. I think if When she is like when she used like it was last episode when she's like Well, that was just triggering for me and she kept trying to like have a fight with jesse in front of the the group about how jesse That felt it felt like a scene. Yeah, she's I she I'm sorry. I think that she's somebody that's made for reality television Okay, let me revise. I think they're a real couple because we met them at hulu guerrilla But I do think there probably was a little bit of like when she told her to apologize I think michelle gave her the branch and she was like, okay, I'm gonna take the branch and like I'm just gonna say the opposite of what justin saying that I'm like if the girl wanted to be on orange county housewives And had to settle as jesse loli's girlfriend on the valley Then this is the behavior that we're getting and the attitude that we're getting it is 32 flavors Sense she wanted to be on bravo. She got on bravo. Not the way she wanted to Also the way that she I know this is last episode But the way that she was like the things that you texted jesse about me You said that I was ugly and that I had too much filler and botox and this then they showed the screenshots of the text Literally did not say that it did say like if you're gonna bring women around that are gonna like be my child step It was definitely not nice, but it wasn't like she's ugly That's why I love her is because she's saying things that are not true and then it's like she backtracks it Or it's the all-exact opposite. She's like this is how you made me feel because this is what you didn't say But I read it and I know and it's just like I don't know fucking bravo This episode was like As much as I want to try to like empathize and defend dany and I don't think we know everything It is really hard to watch like The doubling down the tripling down when nia's literally trying to give him every moment of like yep Don't say anything don't say anything. We're still on camera. We're still mic'd and him just still saying him being like Why would you say that about me now now? You're saying things about me. It's like no like the thing I don't get about this relationship because I We I respect that nia and dany are hanging on their business outside of The the group so I don't what I don't I liked it more And I feel like I said this last season the season before how I do like that when they have issues that like they try not to really Explode on camera that they tried to keep it between the two of them as much as possible I do appreciate that what I don't appreciate and it's kind of the same I feel like when parents will fight in front of their kids And then they'll have like this huge knockout drag out fight yelling whatever in front of their kids and then Maybe they make up before bed and the next morning They're like hey honey and like act like everything. I feel like you have to show the makeup You have to show what brought you back together For your kids obviously to like see how you work through problems But it's like you have to you can't show us this like crazy fight where you're the most Disrespectful to your wife. You're not helping at all with your children. And then we just like What did you say to make up? Did you apologize? I completely agree with that because recently everyone knows now talking about the fact that dany was booked for watch what happens live I think he was supposed to appear what I don't this week or whatever And he opt it out and he and he blamed it on an opportunity that he got in LA And whether that's true or not. I'm just like If I'm Danny I want to speak on this right like Maybe it's the drinking. I don't know but like you can't blame this just on the edit and I I want to give dany the benefit of the doubt that like it seems to be Some kind of drinking problem. I you know and maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm reading the citric Maybe it's deeper than that. Maybe he's just a bad guy. I don't know Maybe la la's right and that nea should leave him. I feel like that's a little too far. But who knows But like, you know, we I think we've all had friends that when they take some shots They get fucking weird and nasty like they turn into a different person and if that's all dany is it's still wrong But like if that it's what it is, what are you doing taking shots? On camera with this group if you're nea Like if if you have this relationship or you're helping each other out and you don't want to expose some of your like Deeper issues on camera. Why why are what is going on with why are you filming? Yeah, and that makes you change your behavior that makes you seem like a real fucking asshole to your wife Lalo said that too. Lalo was like, I don't know everything but what I'm seeing is the problem Why why why continue to drink and it's just like for me though The issue that I have is last episode not this past episode but last episode when they were on the safari where Obviously his wife is stressed out exhausted their baby. She's hot the baby's hot and all she's asking is like, hey You know clip in cut just just can you help me find something to fan our baby with and he's just like acting so annoyed so irritated so like Ugh, like why did we bring a babysitter and it's like she she just had a baby Like she's not ready to hand off her child for eight hours a day so that she can give you more attention And when he said that his gripe was because he needed more attention I'm just like who's the child here? You've you've had four kids back to back Let her tend to her kid and you actually show up and be there so that she has the energy to give that to you But that was bonkers that he said that because the episode before that one when they're at the roller coasters And she's like i'm so excited to spend time with you and he's like this is feeling very performative It's like so which is it do you want to she can't win or not? Well and to circle back natalie to what you said like I feel like neah and Danny we're attempting to try to give us the like resolution part of it But then Danny somehow maneuvered it in a way We're now neah's apologizing for bringing something up on camera when it's like Why is she apologizing? Why is she apologizing? How did we get to this point for stating that you have shitty behavior? And that it needs to change for acknowledging it after you were talking to her for like an hour and yelling at la la And yelling at your wife like and that's a thing where i'm like If you can't keep that in the box in the sense to where it maybe this isn't what like because I do hate when people kind of go into the whole like Well, then imagine what's happening behind closed doors because like let's not make it seem as if somebody is like scary abusive Lala was kind of doing that you know what I mean where i'm just kind of like if they have the audacity a lot of the times When if people have the audacity to do that in front of people it's usually like this is what it is Yeah, lala's clearly projecting her life choices onto neah and danie Exactly exactly and i'm just like I I think that Danny has a An issue with drinking and his behavior and I think he needs to seek Some attention for that, but I don't think that neah would be in love with this man. That's completely abusive Yeah, I again like it can be I completely agree with you But the thing that is concerning and a weird like is that the fact that he is avoiding speaking on this tells me He doesn't want to address it doesn't want to acknowledge it It wouldn't be that hard to just whether it's watching what happens live comes on a podcast whatever I hope we get a chance to speak with with them to just say yo, yeah, this is not my best self and it was hard to watch me Like it should be really easy for any guy whether you like have some excuses or editing to just say That was hard to watch me speak to my partner that way and that is not who I want to be or who I am and like I did it I have to own it but that is not I think that is an ugly version of me even like with Kyle last night We're you know on the episode I think he was crying in the confessional We've you know, we've criticized Kyle at nausea, but like yes, it was humanizing to see it hear him say Like my actions Have really caused me to be in this place I am today and whether I have my excuses or not I have made some of these choices and I have to own that and that is humanizing and that is like, you know But it is also really frustrating to this is Season after season something we've seen with Danny And I don't know if they just maybe don't watch the episodes back But like how could you have not watched last season and be like, oh I see the issue got it. All right cool locking in. How are we back here again for another season? because he got accused of Grabbing another woman inappropriately and a lot of people including all of us for like, we know that's not okay But this feels like a maybe a one-off and like it seems like the people talking about are really trying to milk it to that whatever though it's still a really Really terrible thing to be accused of or to even suggest that you did that and for any person it should mortify them That like that that they're being discussed in that manner and to that point you would think that would be like all the wake-up Call you would need to like going forward on camera to just be like I should probably not fucking take shots What did Nia say? She said I think it just it was the same thing of saying that he had a Like a gang a gig post. I mean everybody just thinks that he's Bailing on it because yeah, he doesn't want to mean Nia just confirmed that he had a like a gig And I also wonder too because I'm like I just remember last season to defending Danny Just in the sense that I was like How can we be so hard on Danny when we have Brittany sitting here talking about jacks throwing her and rose bushes? and when you're comparing the two behavior where obviously You shouldn't be comparing situations, but when you have somebody that is so outwardly Disruptive in his behavior in how he talks to his wife whatever that it's like you're not really looking at Danny as like the biggest problem Now having jacks being removed from this season. I do think that it definitely like spotlights Uh Danny in a different way because I'm like jesse and michelle are no longer fighting So ugly with each other like they were the last season that made it almost unbearable to watch Brittany might as well be a guest or like a friend of on the show because jacks is no longer on it So it's like the main focus right now is this like perfect marriage that we've seen for the first two seasons And then it's like kind of almost feels like it's like their time to be spotlight. Does that make sense? Yeah Yeah, but it does it doesn't feel like it's manufactured. It feels very like Like the curtain's been lifted or something You know what I mean? Like where jacks has stepped away and then it's like, oh wait Danny and Nia don't have this like perfect marriage To me you see that with like the drag Not the drag I guess like the pageant scene when it was like the cameras are always looking now at like Nia, Danny and lala like that's what they were focused on but you're catching so much Like why would they be looking at all the other men when they're just like in a fun situation? I don't know because I'm like I now I see where like Brittany kind of feel like she Got reprimanded or whatever last season because she brought up Danny's drinking and then everybody yelled at her at the table and said She was jealous and in this episode. They said that they talked about it. Zach brought it up, which is interesting Saying that Bernie's never liked Nia I was like, I don't and I never liked Nia or has she been trying to look out for Nia And it kind of feels like the other cast members too are kind of trying to show that last season Then it's like they aren't perfect, but I don't know like I don't know why Danny would then lean into it Like if you are around people that you don't feel safe with if you're around people that you think Inflate your behavior, then why would you go get blackout and then start saying things at the table towards Janet? Yeah, I just wish that this I think the valley comparing it to like in the city Like I maybe it's just me because like I relate to like when Kyle's talking about You know like his business struggling um Like that's really relatable stuff I want to hear more about like it seems like the valley is always just going from relationship to relationship to try to expose Each relationship like to be something that it's not Yeah, and I just like I find that to not be that like Transitioning to summer house. There was that moment when Kyle and Amanda were talking about I don't know if I forget which one conversation, but I think it was the one outside the house And they're like we've had some of our best And some of our worst memories of our lives And now that is real shit man like a marriage or any relationship that lasted decade Like I think it was Lindsay Hubbard not too long ago Like when the someanda when the scamander came out and she's like if youth like our personal lives are there's way more Drama than we share and that's so true because like even reality v stars have their limit to like the Every little detail they're going to share about their lives And the truth is is every relationship and all of our lives are messy. There's no such thing as a perfect relationship Even the best ones they have to fight To keep the relationship going and have to put in the work and I you know I'm not saying this because of what what is it? What's really but like I can only imagine the shit that Kyle and Amanda have had to deal with together to survive a relationship on camera public scrutiny And that's the real shit and it's just like it's I'm hoping that in the city like You know shows me like that was that in the in the season preview and he calls his best friend that he gets introduced to His best friend the bar owner And he says you're the birdie Bernie Madoff Of the of a hospitality like that is first of all like a crazy thing to say about your alleged best friend Birdie Madoff is a con artist and he destroyed many people's lives through like stealing all their money So I don't know where that comes from. Maybe that's but like I I'm interested in that aspect of like the Of these relationships and how work and relationships like really affect these people's lives In a way that the valley seems to have a hard time tapping into To your point, I think it's a lot of people who have Their main focus is like their relationships and like obviously it's like influencer work, which like good great and whatever But I'm like they don't really have things going on that they can share about I just even remember a season with jacks where he was like Did an event for like bald premature balding or something But it was like at least jacks remembered that like hey, I should be pushing a product That's a good point, you know what I mean like they're in limbo Which to me summer house kind of also felt like it was in limbo because it was just like the same Situationships and like fuck boys and But like you had people like starting companies or like wanting to do a bathing suit line or like Dealing with intense debt and and or or going bankrupt and it's just like these are real life issues that like people in our bracket And our age group it's like if you're not dealing with it now you may deal with it in the future You're gonna have a friend that deals with this versus like a do you like me or do you not like me? Do you like her and it's like too grown to watch this kind of scenario go back and forth That's why in the city. I think it's so good 100% I want to watch people with real jobs with real opinions that have real insults God bless the fight between carl and kyle, but like you six foot five motherfucker If that's the worst thing you can come up with versus you're the burning or made off of hospitality Also, I forget her name. Sorry. I'm getting into this cast But lindsay's friend the dermatologist who has like Georgina I'm so locked into her like she has more than one kid and her husband left her We don't know why she is a business owner. She is like surviving in new york with kids who like oh my god like poor I'm locked into this person. Oh my god when she opened and she's like I lost my shit, you know We're her change of clothes. No, I like I low key wouldn't be a dermatologist in my next life, but I saw that I was like I was like, I know what to get. She was like casual outfit black tie Chanel Chanel. Yeah Like just in your cabinet in your dermis. Okay. You just never know when you're gonna get the call in new york I usually when I go to those places. I usually take a couple like cotton fobs and so now I know there's a chanel in the back Dare I say that in the city is just housewives repackage. I think that's why I enjoyed it But it feels better than housewives like housewives felt I don't it just felt so seeny and it felt so like just these weren't friends I don't know. It just didn't feel as genuine to me and this like lindsay going after kinny and being like, listen I'm just meeting this guy. Like I'm just asking you Very surface level questions and if you're getting defensive, that's a you problem Like yeah, that's so real of just like meeting someone for the first time and being like he's like this is giving I hate men. She's like, I'm just annoyed by men or something Good point because also andrea and daniel being a part of this cast to me shows like these were the friends That were all in summer house that stayed friends. It became friends and now we're seeing like their real friendships And then what this daniel like relationship? Who is this guy who? As soon as they started talking about it. She's like, I've known him for nine years Then we like both went our separate ways got into relationships So this is like her version of the story and he's like, yeah, and then we recanel and that sounds like very sweet and very innocent Very like rom-com-ish dating for sex violence There is like listen like if you go on reality tv your life changes obviously and like a lot of you know And and and people treat you a little bit differently And like a lot of the people you know if they're not you're like your tight group of friends like your acquaintances and like your your circle like they get kind of weird around you and and if they've ever had a Desire to do what you did which is to like go on reality tv or get some kind of public profile They can get weird and hard to trust you So like my spider senses went up when he was like, oh you knew she he knew you before you were like famous and now Now you're on a tv show and all of a sudden you're back together and here he is on a tv show And then here amanda is being like yeah, and he's married and he's married Isn't that better though that if he knew her before I don't know. Listen, maybe it maybe it means nothing But it just makes me wonder if his if he's there for the right reason so to speak Where it's just like what was the draw for him to reach back out? Well, he got her pregnant. So I thought he looked sweet I was like, okay, this is like one of the people you knew in your past Like and like he came back because it actually was a relationship that like makes sense Yeah, maybe did you see the tweet that was kenny being like she's such a doll like you know talking about whitney She's such a doll and such a little angel and then whitney being like I love him so much I moved here from the middle of nowhere to new york city and it shows a picture of jacks taylor and britney Oh, it didn't clock that It was just some tweet that went viral, but like so funny because I hope not it's like whitney has been a successful influencer for a very long time and lived out here So like that's where i'm like no you're not she moved from city to city The way that she makes it sound though is as if like he like plucked her out of obscurity in michigan I didn't hear that and I was like wait, where is she from because it's like to me I got the vibe that she was la but it sounded right. Yeah, she's 100 percent But whatever do we honest question this is not meant even to be snarky or mean but watching the summer house And watching the whole seara and west dynamic and again the kiss And then like jess and then west trying to pull her into the bed and jesse being like yo, dude If you jesse solomon of all people giving like solid based Relationship advice, which is like yo, dude. You have to be 110 percent not even 100 you gotta throw in an extra 10 Yeah, he's like I know and like is west wilson emotionally Stunted and stupid and I'm not saying that to be cruel or mean or is he that macavelian? Where he just like he knows what he's doing but doesn't give a fuck because at this point It is so and kyle references on watch what happens live It's just like the way he talks about like, uh, you know, I didn't want to hurt her when we You know when we try to date casually and like as kyle pointed out on watch what happens life What about seara makes you think that she is interested in anything casual with you? Like what are you again? Are you are you that dense? Or do you just not give a fuck? I don't think he gives a fuck. Yeah, I was like he does not give a fuck. He's not stupid and like I'm sorry. I know friend of show love him dearly But like it reminds me of every time tom shorts would get caught for cheating or something and he'd just be like I um I just like you know like it was just like a bad moment like you I didn't I didn't I didn't think about it And it's like by how many times can you do the same thing over and over again and just not think about it? Or maybe you should stop drinking or like do something different where I'm like west Takes zero accountability for anything he does and then the second he gets confronted He can talk shit behind his podcast mic or on his little tick talk But then it's the second that he's confronted face to face with somebody just being like let's have a conversation He's just like I just I don't I It's the amount of times he said like that. I'm like, okay. You're playing a character Yeah, like you want to play this like oh, I'm a little boy that doesn't know what decisions I'm making so you can't really be mad at me But I'm like you make big destructive decisions. You're gonna have to deal with big destructive fallout He's literally telling ben to like tell his girlfriend to chill out on playing cupid and then like 10 minutes later He's making it with sierra. That's why I think he's doing it on purpose. That was a very that conversation with ben It didn't look like he was hammered. It looked like it was probably at the beginning of the party Like he looked it looked like a very sober self-aware honest conversation and then to then have him Say all of that and then make out with sierra and then Canoodle with her and then try to pull her into his bed. It's just like you you know, you know what you're doing and for Kyle watch what happens live being like west Did that I think he it was asked like about the do you think it was Physical back then or just emotional and he was like, I think it was just emotional But I think west Did certain things that like he knew would Like pull Amanda in essentially I said this when the when the This commander first started I wanted to know who seduced who because I really do think that matters like when you have Like so who started the relationship who started reaching out who started texting who started showing more of an interest I really really think that matters and it doesn't again excuse Amanda But when we're going back and watching these scenes and we're seeing these Intense moments these beautiful moments between sierra and Amanda this like strong woman friendship I don't think that she was like lying through her teeth I mean who knows but like And I just feel like Amanda and again, it's not an excuse It's just like just to understand because like we we all have made really bad decisions that we look back and go What the fuck was I thinking? You know we have to go get therapy and then our therapist has to and it has to been like well You have some childhood trauma and you know, I mean you were you know, whatever it is that you have to unpack but Yeah, it's just more like I it just like I I feel like west is He had again we've talked about he's had he's had a roster of people and Amanda I that I think that scene between sierra mia and Amanda of her like being truly afraid Knowing that she's done with kyle she like the relationships over and probably the thing that kept Amanda hanging out and trying so much wasn't her love for kyle the relationship but a true fear Of like finding something after this relationship because she's been in it for so long and then here's this west guy coming in and and being nice to her and flirting with her and I And I think she just fell for it I have a follow-up question with this is Is a fuck boy kissing you on the forehead more intimate than a fuck boy kissing you on the lips because that's what he would always do Amanda is like Hug her close and then kiss her on the forehead but then be so much But it would be recklessly consistent with kissing sierra on the lips But like that's where i'm like it almost was more intimate what he was doing with amanda now I saw carl. I think it was carl and watch it up and live being like the way that west touch touches amanda or Anyone that is like he was like she is married and the way that his hands go like around her waist Or on certain parts like that just should never happen at all. Yeah her head her hair That should just never happen between a friend these kind of guys who like play this whole like i'm friends with everyone It's very disarming. It's very much. It's like i'm a you know, they Yeah, and they're very touchy feely and they like do like cheek kisses with like the girls and they hug and it's just like It's half of these women are like have boyfriends or ml a this isn't paris like why are you kissing me on the cheek? There's a lot of guys like that. It seems like westy's kind of like does the thing where he's just like You know, he's just the lover boy and again at the end of the Of and when everyone's saying i love you but it started with weston sierra And it's like he shouldn't i'm not saying he shouldn't like when everyone's saying i love you It's not like he shouldn't say it back and like like make a good moment awkward by being like well I'm just saying it as a friend, but that's how he He instead of being cautious about how his actions and words come across to sierra He uses that as an opportunity almost To say things that like she is just gonna find confusing or misleading sierra do they do this i mean is this every Season finale where everyone's crying and being like no, right everyone's dead and where they're not gonna see each other again Like no it was giving van der pump finale I saw because i thought the same thing too i was like why is everybody crying so hard at this But i think it's because they obviously knew that in the city was happening And so i don't think they knew like whether or not everyone's coming back next season So like this could be some people's last season So i think that kind of had Something to play in it, but i was like yeah no they usually are like you guys live in the same It was sitting on the same island it was sitting around the table before they walked out to me You know Y'all are gonna run into each other at the coffee shop. What why are we crying the opening scene of in the city where it's Amanda and kyle uh-huh and they're talking about the the west thing and she's like I mean you cheated on me. I would never cheering you and like how could you like how would you even suggest that? He's like no i didn't he's like there's a video and he's like Okay, no, no, no, no what he said specifically he says says who there's a video That was funnier him saying says who I think i think kyle's learned that you know sometimes it's not worth pushing back or just like that was true You're right no notes. All right. I also thought it was really interesting that scene You know post summer house predating the amanda Dating west and you have that walking on the street again another great moment where you're walking the streets of new york having a Scene love that very authentic not sitting down and they're getting out of therapy And they're like you're catching up with them outside of therapy and she's like you came home at four in the morning again you know like you deep you know and at just I would I really appreciate these about these moments because again regardless of what you think of Amanda and her choices and I just to me it really makes me it humanizes them in a way that just again doesn't justify the actions But explain like I think it humanizes a man in a way that doesn't make her like some evil monster who? Whose only goal was to get close to seara only to fuck her over You know and I don't like I think this is more about Amanda Truly struggling with herself in her relationship with kyle and her like identity outside of this relationship And I just thought that was a really interesting moment. She did both for sure I think two things can be true at the same time like I think that like she I don't I don't know Just the the emotional connection between her and west like it's just hard for me for them to be like Oh, that wasn't an emotional affair where I'm like very much So you would rather talk to west than talk to your husband while going through things You're saying that you want to work things out and we're only upset about one thing But yet, you know, you're upset about the parting but you chose to marry him You said even when they talked about like oh I focused more on the beginning of our relationship and kyle's more focused on the now where I was like Well, that makes sense for kyle to be focused on the now because you found out about the cheating or the Accusations or whatever and then still accepted a proposal still went through a marriage Still came back every summer complaining about this husband. That's such a problem for you But you did nothing to fix it or change it and now you're so checked out and it's just like I don't know So that's where I'm like, are we really working on it? Are we just harping on like the one thing versus like talking about all the other things that aren't being addressed on camera Do you guys like the fact that she decided to separate with him at the anniversary dinner or did that seem like unnecessarily like bad timing? I just felt like it was kind of mean bad timing also I didn't I mean, it's kind of a It's in picky but like when when she when kyle was like, all right Well, if I agree to this and she's like you don't have to agree with it. Well, yeah, you do a man Yes, you can move out kyle's not keeping you prisoner, but you're not just moving out You're saying i'm gonna move out, but I want us to still be together. I want us to still work on a relationship You know like you're we're we're still gonna do this and that's kyle does have to agree to that and like Give him a fucking chance to like process what you are trying to ask him to be okay with he's not okay Yeah, you want to move out he is processing whether this is you're saying it's not the end But he has a choice to say well if you're gonna move out We're done Yeah, see that and this is what I had an issue with with that final conversation with summer house and then this conversation as well was that I am like You know that you want distance when she was like oh when sierra brought that up and it was surprising to me too I was like no the fuck it wasn't you were literally A part of that conversation then acting as if sierra was like Going out of bounds by saying these things when you're having these conversations Constantly saying how unhappy you are crying on the floor the whole nine So it's like you're not telling what kyle the half of how you actually feel in this marriage in this relationship But you'll tell everybody else and then when there's finally some sort of solution which would be moving out or separating or whatever It's like well. This isn't the end of us This is just how we're going to work on and it's like in what world does any relationship have like A married couple move apart from each other It's like that is such a rare occasion to where i'm like it just sounds like you want to break up But you don't want to lose him entirely So we're gonna keep you on a little leash where it's like you full access to me I have full access to you We're not broken up But like we're not like together and I don't need to consult you with like my where i'm going and what i'm doing every day But yet like if I want to see you or I need to feel loved or I need to feel something I can call you can I say for a second despite the west and Amanda of it all We can't knock her necessarily for wanting to baby step out of the marriage, right? Like divorce doesn't just happen like and you move out. So like I think she was afraid to like Vocalize exactly what she said and unfortunately that comes out the detriment of kyle Well, it's what i'm saying though is that I'm like instead of having an actual conversation about your feeling or how he makes you feel or What this relationship is doing to you instead? It was like okay because when we're having this conversation with sierra and me It's i'm done with the relationship when we're having this conversation with kyle. It's it's not a breakup It's not it's not we're just taking time. We're taking space and it's like no you're literally just Bread coming a breakup but being like it's fine, but we're still together So you don't have to feel weird about maybe she still did think that there was something or maybe she was afraid To acknowledge to herself that that was over which is makes a mess up I'm with justin like I don't think there's a Perfect roadmap of how to get divorced and I think you always even want to try to do it differently You know, but I think it's just more like I just feel like honesty like you can't sit here where i'm like and think of how hurt kyle's going to be Watching back this season and seeing how you actually feel how you actually talk about him versus what you're saying to him To keep him on the line to keep him defending you in public So let him talk like he wasn't able to talk And then she says you can't express himself That's the thing I was like I also see that where i'm like, okay, let him at least say his perspective Didn't before this anniversary dinner where she was like i'm gonna move out Didn't we have a flashback scene to where he was like, I think you should move out Well, no that was the after the therapy session. She said yeah, he told me to move out But then the flashback didn't necessarily show that we saw a flashback of him being like I can't be in the same house with you and do this With you like you need to move out the separation So I guess he did so yeah, he did so then and then we have the her at the anniversary dinner being like Yeah, so i'm gonna move out It's like so I don't feel like this was This like drop of information Over monsterella caviar sticks. I do think amanda's unwillingness to just let kyle Process what he said and make it like her decision to I think sierra's point was She was kind of pretending This was like an idea to fix the relationship and in reality deep down it was like step one Of or To like leave the relationship and maybe she didn't want to admit that to kyle or herself I will say like I I keep him failing. I have to like oh, we're not defending kyle's actions, but like I mean he when he was talking about how at one point and he took people's money You know, he asked friends and family to invest in his business And and that is meaningful on on on so many levels and to know that at one point You could have sold that company for 25 acts their investment and now you're struggling to survive that like yeah Yeah, that is like that'll destroy our person like that's the that feels like the weight of the world When you have like people you're responsible for in salaries and some of these people are people you care about and Yeah, and people trusted you with their money And I mean whenever I'm feeling stressed out about work. I am so grateful I have natalie to like just you know feel like I have a partner and I feel like I have someone to like Listen to me and and give me ideas and if Amanda wasn't that for kyle I you know like it doesn't justify how he Spoke to her but I get where that anger and and resentment And that abandonment feels like because if he was just like all of a sudden He's on the top of a mountain and then it just got come crashing down. I know we've all mocked the dj But if he is a Making money from it in a space where he's that's that's his he hasn't found success in other places He doesn't have a salary and and b, you know, it's also feeling like He's probably felt like a failure the past couple years both professionally and in his relationship And and when he does try with his wife, he just gets fucking shot down And just like and then anywhere it's just like a chicken for the egg Again, like doesn't justify these actions But at some you know, these aren't these things don't just happen in a vacuum You know, there's no real like starting point, you know And I just don't think you can blame the whole relationship on on kyle and how he spoke to amanda I don't again. It doesn't justify it but like You can poke a bear so many times before like they just like fucking lose their shit and I and it See clearly kyle feels alone. Yeah. Yeah, I believe him that he feels piled on and I don't think he's delusional for feeling that way No, even when he said his whole thing where he was like, I looked over the table And you looked you had a smug look on your face and that just like it felt like you were eating it up that everybody was And I'm just like even with my partner. I'm like, I'm sorry. There's just no world in which I'm sitting around a table I don't care if it's my best of best friends If you're coming at my partner, I am going to interject because it's none of your business It's also different if you're throwing them to the walls. Yeah, like trying to defend it, you know what I mean Or just being like enough guys enough like he gets it You know what I mean where I'm just like even lindsay started the whole thing off popping off with like Oh, but he got a dj career and it's just like was that necessary? Like and it just feels like for him like that that no one's gonna jump in and be like, okay, lindsay Like, you know like enough and especially to look to his wife and his wife is just like Yeah, did you guys see the teaser for the season of in the city and it it's amanda going if you come for me I'll come for you. No, that's like I wish that I was real but I doubt it I wonder if that was real but It was probably clever editing but like a silly conversation that they were having and they were like, yes Yeah, I hope I really like I hope it doesn't go that way and I I mean, I think they're cordial like giving some Some good punchy one liners. I was kind of like I don't know. How do you guys feel about uh, kyle charging amanda back rent? That was nuts. That's crazy. You're married. I don't understand Wait, what was the back rent for again explain? He said that if they're like if he's staying in that place and she's not living or she was no She hadn't paid rent for the last three years and he was like so I added it all up I don't like but like we $19,000 which honestly I will eat up amanda being like already paid it. Yeah, yeah, literally Yes, but that is but I am curious where that the day do they have their I mean some married couples Split yeah completely split finances. They don't combine their finances and if that that's it sounds like that's what The only way that would make sense is if they've completely split their finances But I mean I do that but even then I'm like I I feel like that would be a conversation You don't get to make a spreadsheet after we're separating and be like well since this didn't work out Like this is what you've wrapped up. This is what happens though with like when you divorce or separate No, it would make sense if they split their finances Yeah, and they amanda has her joint bank account and and kyle has his And they have their businesses and when they and bravo pays them and they do their social whatever they get It just goes in their separate accounts and then there's no like mutual account where maybe some of the joint, you know Like and then they agree to you know at some point early in their marriage they just agreed to split expenses and then like life happened and And kyle has this like in the you know in the middle of his marriage It's just like rents due so like I'm just going to pay the rent, you know because we're married not thinking much about it And then the relationship goes south and then they get divorced and he's like but I technically paid all the rent You know and you didn't and and we were technically supposed to split it then that would that would make sense And do we remember like sudden on Beverly Hills had a forensic like investigator or accountant that like looked into everything And like they're gonna do it if kyle's not doing it the forensic I hear what you're saying But all I'm saying is that it's crazy work It does look like splitting finances that you covered the rent one month and we're like Okay, get me when you when you can and then you do it again and then you do it again for three years Then I would just assume you're paying the rent like I don't think you like three years later You're like, you know what remember that one time you forgot to pay right and then I just kept doing it for three years But we never talked about it again. You owe me or like moving forward like we're good. You're gonna split like I know I was covering it. It's kind of giving like remember that Um gift I gave you for Christmas a few years ago. I'm gonna need that back because we're working out now and Also, she he was her boss Yeah, so I'm also kind of like what do you mean you're paying her mortgage or her rent She's doing your creative directing and Design I think it says where like kyle is like with his finances, you know Like I think it just reveals a little more of like he is in a position where he needs it I think he did say that I'm like watch what happens live that he was kind of like He I think lindsay said that she made more money than he did that year So which by the way and divorce you go into survival. That's what happens. I just still think that that's crazy work I will say I thought it was nuts the conversation that kyle had with kinny at the restaurant the first time we meet kinny And i was like talking about amanda and he's saying you know how like she used to be this way and now she's this way And she doesn't ever come around and blah blah blah and kyle's like yeah they're talking just about like how much she's changed or whatever and I feel like if you aren't and kyle's like agreeing with him and you know, I feel like if you're not willing to grow like With your partner like clearly she doesn't she she she's in her 30s like she doesn't want to go out She doesn't want to do this. She doesn't want to do that anymore like that's part of just maybe I don't know growing up or whatever But the fact that it's like he sees that as a flaw and not of like That's I feel like that's when people fall out of love is when they stop growing with their partner They stop like they just expect to grow out the exact same person they were when they met Yeah, and not like both like individuals stubbornly Don't try to find whatever that balance is I do think it is interesting that amanda In with in a relationship with kyle like was always like the homebody who never wanted to do anything And post divorce amanda can't help she needs to wear wigs because she needs to go out so bad Only to get popped but you know at the game. It's just like girl like you well, what is she gonna do stay home? She did with kyle Well, I think her mental health might be a little struggling right now And maybe she needs like her friends and to go out and get out of the house and to like have her friends force feed her Or whatever it is Yeah, and staying in your house like reclusing from everyone being a hermit crab only makes your mental health worse So I understand her wanting to get out of the house But even to like kyle's point when he was kind of like it makes me sad to know that like someone else is going to Enjoy the amanda that I fell in love with and I'm like, yeah, like and that's so solid That's why like a lot of people where it's like you got to stick it out Because it's just like imagine that you did all of this work to give it to somebody else That's like this improved thing But I'm just like I also think that amanda kind of if you remember early seasons of summer house Amanda did the same thing that she's doing with west now is that I'm the fun girl I love going out I party all the time blah blah blah blah blah and then you get comfortable You're with somebody for a while you don't need to do all that stuff anymore And I think that's who amanda actually is but like right now she's doing the well I'm young and I'm dating west and like I got to keep up and west hangs out with all these girls So I got to be there because if I'm not there somebody else will be there and like thinking that the fact that like She was going over to his house to pregame before he was going out on dates like he she knows that if he's if she's not going out He's not staying home with her I thought about this last night of like do you guys remember before we knew that amanda and west were anything They just were posting like videos together like on the street or like at bars Like none of us clocked But any of that was anything we were just like oh, they're just friends hanging out Even though they never were like friends like that hanging out to go drink and stuff Oh my god I like click on some of the girls that like west click I like like comments on and whatnot and being like how close are they and then it's like there's so many girls that are just like I just feel like west is in their orbit in a way that like is just like a rotating door Okay, we have to talk about the reunion trailer. Yes Yes, the west not walking out It's crazy No, lindsay going are you gonna get up or are you gonna go get your girl be a man get your girl Oh them sharing a dressing room and him walking in and kissing her I was just like oh this feels so weird and then yeah having everybody be like go get your girl Go get your girl and kyle being like this is so fucking weird and i'm like yeah because it's still your girl Still It's a line of like he's only dating you despite me which is a sick burn And I think it had the desired effect which was to hurt amanda that being said I think it was like I mean obviously not true and I think that's the thing that like That's the hardest thing to get over a heartbreak Is the realization That like sierra has invested so much of her energy and and and love and and consideration into this possibility with west only to realize He doesn't give a fuck about her and he you know and that is to to care about something so much The indifference of the other person is the thing that hurts the most That's why our friends are always like kind of lying to us when we're like then they're trying to make us feel better Is to try to come up with some other Excuse then they just don't give a fuck and I think that's just really the hardest thing to try to you know because we It should be the signal of like why we should move on because they're you know instead of feeling not good enough It should be the thing that makes us go this person doesn't appreciate what i'm willing to bring and you know it's but like her saying that is like To me explains why she's had such a hard time of getting over this relationship with west because like You know we want it's it's hard to it's hard to it's hard to realize the thing we cared about and invested so much of her energy that other person He because clearly west doesn't give a fuck You know you can't say that west cares about anything about what sierra feels even though he pretends to or he's just stupid Because like sierra is so clear about what she wants from west and he still keeps pretending to be confused about what she wants And I think it's because he just doesn't give a fuck. He doesn't care You know what I was also thinking about is like how do they show up to I guess we kind of saw because we saw them enter together into the Dressing room, but it's like how can west and amanda even show up in this reunion because they either show up and double down as We're full on couple Or they just like say we're not a couple then but then it's like why did you do all this, you know? So it is in my in my opinion is kind of in spite of sierra Regardless like you can't what do you mean? Like nobody thinks that these two people are gonna end up getting getting married like nobody thinks or maybe they have to like they have To at this point in my head. I'm like I don't think west's intentions of Getting amanda to fall for him getting her in his bed whatever that however it started I don't think his intention behind that was like I want to piss off sierra and I want to ruin I want to ruin a friendship. I want to like I don't think that was in the back of his head I think he was literally not like no No, they they hit it like that's what I'm saying So that it wasn't a tension because you knew it was gonna hurt people and you did it anyways So I'm like no there's there is an intention there because it's like I could choose to not fuck with my ex's best friend or my Friends wife, but instead you both chose to do it knowing that it's wrong and then hit it for months on end But there's a difference between knowing you're gonna piss someone off and doing it anyways Like west like he doesn't care that sierra is upset. He just he just he just cares to the extent that he's in the doghouse Yeah, he doesn't actually care that she's hurt if he if he gave a fuck that she's hurt He would move so differently this throughout this entire season. He doesn't care It would have never happened. He only cares about how it impacts him I don't know because for me. I'm just like at the end of the day There's two people that they both had to have thought about in that situation and still moved forward with it And I'm sorry, but I'm just like again too many people in this world. I understand Oh, she doesn't know if anyone will ever be nice to her again after kyle Whatever I'm just like it's loser behavior at the end of the day to sit there and be like Oh, I might my actions don't actually affect anybody until I get found out or caught about it like sorry I was gonna say I think like I don't Think they did they started dating to hurt sierra I think they started dating and they didn't stop it in spite because they knew it was gonna hurt sierra So I think like I agree just if they if they cared about sierra and like didn't want to date like they just would have never done it Yeah, it would have never been a questions asked of like yeah, you're making a point. I don't think they cared I don't think they cared. I think hiding it though That show that you cared hiding it no because hiding came after the fact right high because they knew they would get in trouble They knew that this would happen. They knew like as kyle would say I don't know how they're gonna survive this This was about them getting through it, you know because if if if sierra like magically was like, you know what honestly I'm over it. I don't care. God bless you guys. I don't think they've been like oh well if you don't care Then we're just not gonna date anymore. Yeah, like if if you're not pissed I also don't think it was like oh we're too like too drunks In west's apartment whatever and they're like, you know what we should do like to piss off sierra like we should make out No, I don't think it was that I think it was the morning after they're like, oh fuck We have people who if they find out about this like we're fucked and I think it came after the fact I don't think they did it to spite or hurt sierra or hurt kyle But also aren't their friends that are just completely off limits like when you care enough about someone you're like I don't even question like I don't know that they're gonna talk about in the reunion in the sense of like her turning off her Location and doing all that shit, but I'm just like again It's the you can't help who you fall for sure, but you can help who you spend your time with You don't need to be reaching out to west. You don't need to be spending all your time with them Oh my god, I have a crush if anything that should be more of a reason for you to want to distance yourself If you didn't want to get into anything messy not answer the text messages exciting. It's fun. It's fun to sneak around It's fun to do things behind people's backs and have your own little romantic thing that nobody's gonna understand And then guess what it comes out because you hit it because it's not genuine It also was like I mean I'm curious what the timelines didn't come out to during the reunion But like us finding out that it was longer than what people are saying and even like jesse being like I was told it wasn't this like kyle said from episode one You've spent more time with my wife than I have in the last six months So that means since january 2025 of last year. Yeah, so it's So I mean you do the math you're choosing to spend more time with your friends x than you are with your friends and with your own husband you guys see that Clip that everyone's talking about where it's everyone's leaving the house And west gives amanda like a very intimate hug and kiss in the forehead Yep, and here is there and amanda has a almost a look of like we just got caught of like So that's what we're saying though is like it was more than just the actual hookup where it's like this would have never happened If they clearly knew that something was weird even compared to hug For sure. Yeah compared the hug uh that Amanda gave carl right where it's still long Held but very side very like I love you like like very brotherly sisterly And then compare that to the hug between her and west you pulling your chair up next to me Hugging massaging the hair kissing the forehead kissing the side of the head Even the way that west was so comfortable grabbing amanda while she's actually trying to calm her own husband down I'm just like you shouldn't be involved in this and yet here you are That i'm like you cannot tell me that something more wasn't going on at that point They may not have gotten physical but an emotional connection was formed to where you were going to west for comfort versus your own husband But notice how west was coming to her to comfort her what it's always less there with his arms open It's always west coming up to her Protecting her making her feel like this safe little bird that can feel like in his arms So then think about what's But think about the fact that they've been hanging out on their own for the last six months before this that i'm like What is amanda been going over to his apartment telling him about kyle? And that was still your active husband that you were not separated pre pre gaming the date with mea from southern hospitality Who do you think amanda's first call to? Was post conversation with kyle about i'm staying in a hotel for the next two nights west I think it was sierra. I think it was west. I thought it was i want to know that's that i want to know I feel like it was sierra because they had just had that conversation And I feel like she like as soon as she gets in the car. She's like, oh my god I did it like what we just talked about this and I did it and this is how it went and maybe her second call I hope andi asked that at the reunion Can I ask a question further and i'm not alleging anything? But do we think she actually went to a hotel or do we think she was spending all that time in west apartment? Even if she got a hotel like I wouldn't be surprised if she called west to hang out Like that's what i'm saying is to get my mind off the thing. She wasn't calling sierra She wasn't alone and sierra definitely confirms that in the reunion because she was like well He was comforting you. She's like what the fuck was I doing? So it's like you were not calling me when you were calling him to go grab brunch after he had brunch with your husband But I'm like this is crazy talk. I'm just like If I'm choosing to spend Time with somebody who's not my husband to talk shit about my husband while I'm planning on leaving my husband It's gonna be the guy you're moving on with not like and she's been with kyle for how long and put up with all of his Shit for how long yeah, they're you know, it's like I think amanda is really convincing when she's talking to kyle Almost like I can't believe you're accusing me of this She's very convincing Yeah, I also think she's kind of maybe convinced herself because you're right I mean it just it is There's an intimacy that you see with west and her in the house that is just there's I do hope there is some acknowledgement of That and even if it's if they're if they want to be like there was nothing there was nothing but we see how it looks Like I just hope that the reunion there needs to be some acknowledgement of that because that's the only thing they can do Though is to just admit like wrong which which they should I mean at this point. Yes, just that's what's so crazy It's just like I know it's sometimes scary to admit it But like just acknowledge you fucked up and you were a shitty fucking friend and if if that cost is to never be friends with Sierra again You she will regret that but like that is a justifiable cost for what he what she did to seara but stop pretending That you're a victim Even though yes, we can empathize how you got to this place, but you still did the shitty thing You were a bad wife, you know like you were a bad friend and like to pretend That's not the case and for west to just be like aw shucks. I didn't mean it Is fucking crazy It is crazy how there was not he didn't say one thing that entire reunion trailer Even when jesse's crying and he's like I just feel like I'm losing my friend silent That way when jesse was the one I think that also was like Stop lying you guys know this wasn't this sort of sex crazed whatever like it doesn't matter what it was It's the fact that it started it grew into something and instead of acknowledging that or doing something about it It's like you guys acted as if it's something that's happening to you And and then it's like oh, but we're gonna figure this out and that's why we've been keeping it a secret And it's like how long does it take you guys to figure something out? You both know that you're doing something wrong or else you wouldn't feel the need to hide it You would have been like hey, fuck it. Sorry. This is the love of my life or this is somebody This is what we're trying to figure out But I'm like the idea that you guys are acting like oh the fact that other people are hurt like west is like Oh, I really found out that my uh my actions hurt a lot of people more than I knew and it's like what do you Know it's crazy. It's crazy. I love how they um tried to include like other things About the season in the reunion trailer like for like two seconds To sit like like kj. Who's more your sister? It's like, okay get to the ship. We want to hear All I know is I need andy to start this reunion being like for the first time ever a five-part reunion And I need all four parts. Well, they announced three parts. So in my head, I'm convinced it's going to be two hour three parts They better be it's not going to be but but also like I don't really Like I don't really care about the smaller, you know Unfortunate like bends relationship right now. But honestly to to that point that's where it's like it was selfish What west and amanda did because now nobody cares about everybody else's experience on the show That's what happened at scandalfall Same thing with scandalfall like it just stole the thunder of like emotional moments You got kev and tom like divorced for the first time and then it's like nobody cares. No, we're not talking about that But uh, like I do care about kj storyline But now we are not going to even like address it because we need to get to the oh my god When amanda had the audacity to be like what so nobody's ever been in this situation before like she fucking No, amazing answer by lindsey in high school. Yeah in high school. I was like, thank you But again, that's the part that why is amanda keep trying to pretend Yeah, that you've done nothing wrong. Why just own it. Can I play devil's advocate for two seconds and then we can wrap He doesn't but like what are amanda and west supposed to do like I know they messed up But like at this reunion, they're gonna get obliterated regardless of where they say own it You take your beatings. You are a shitty friend. You are a shitty wife. You are a shitty friend to your Friend all around they just go there and they say this. I know I'm sorry. It was right. I'm sorry. I was selfish I only thought of myself. I didn't You know, I Well, I thought I was caring, but I realized that yeah when sierra was whether she was opening up to west or opening up to Amanda. Yeah, you have to be like, yes, I was incredibly selfish and I have a lot of like Self-reflection to do of why I only Could give a fuck about my feelings And how I was able to seem like I cared about yours when clearly I didn't and I don't have answers for that right now It's the only way they should and I need to figure that shit out But like I don't want to be this person who clearly clearly hurt people. I I thought I cared about but Yep, I'll say kind of boring television Listen, I I would sit there and watch it either way But I'm just like the idea that you guys could come there being defensive in a way as if As if you have a leg to stand on, you know what I mean? Where it's just like you've hurt a lot of people Also apologize to your 10-year viewership that you ruined our favorite fucking show No, it's they're giving us some of the best television we have seen they ruin it. I don't think they do apologize Oh, no, I want I want an apology because I'm like, what are the fuck are the dynamics going to be next season The the next ai allegedly responds to that weston amanda issues going to be to you personally Listen, I think that was one of the best interest to a new city. I'm locked in a city. I I'm really excited about it I think it's gonna be great. I I really really am excited about it And I think this only helped that Uh summer house, you know, how they evolve I think they would have always had questions because kyle and amanda I think in lindsay its biggest stars have matured outside of going to the hamptons every weekend Yeah, kyle will be there no matter what. Yeah Uh, I think that'll wrap it up. What a fun episode. Thank you guys for listening. Thank you to our guest damari from perfect match Obviously, we will continue to talk about all this drama We appreciate you listening to all our episodes this week if you haven't checked them out We have a full lineup of interviews from the cast of perfect match including ali luber All you bravo fans. You saw ali be the girlfriend of james from van der pump She is now one of the stars of perfect match and she is so fun to watch She'll be sure to check out that interview as well. We appreciate you all listening Do not forget to sign up for vat vat's plus. We'll see you next week. Bye. Bye