Apparently I'm Allowed to Have a Boyfriend

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human Hello gorgeous, it's Lala Kent. Welcome to Untraditionally Lala. Hey babes, it's Lala Kent. Welcome to the bonus episode of Untraditionally Lala. Titi, how we feeling buddy? How we feeling on this Monday buddy? Can I tell you, I have been doing this thing when I have anxiety where I... Home? No, I like get into my chest and do like a Tarzan and all of a sudden I can breathe. I haven't had debilitating anxiety... Didn't Calvin tell you to do that? I did it in front of Calvin for the first time. I didn't even care. He told you, he said you got to just scream. Yeah, and you did. I did. Yeah, I did really well at it. You're continuing that? Today's the first day that I haven't really needed to do it, but to say that I haven't been in the car doing it. Do you hum? Only when I get injections. I go hmm... I got a whole bunch of stuff going on. I'm sometimes too so, so when she's laying on my chair, she loves it. I think that just the uncertainty of life has gotten to me, which I've talked about this before, and you know this, that it doesn't happen often, but there are times where I'm like, we're feeling a bit stagnant and I start to panic. This round of things, the amount of anxiety that I've had, this level since my custody battle, where it's just like I dread the night because I'm left with my thoughts, but I'm snapping out of it and I attribute it to the Tarzan screaming. Yeah. Just get it out, baby. Sometimes you got to scream into a pillow. Yeah, I'm excited for this bonus because it's along the lines. The other day, Ocean told me that I was allowed to have a boyfriend because she has four boyfriends at school. Just like all of that. I was like, I don't love this. We're going to pretend that they're just, well, they are. They are just friends that are boys. Well, then I asked her, I was like, what do you mean you have four boyfriends? And she was like, yeah, like this one, this one, this one, and this one. And I go, okay. And so like they know about each other and she goes, well, yeah, mom, because we're all friends. They're my boyfriends and I'm their girlfriend. I was like, oh, like a friend that's a boy. And she was like, yeah, mom, what else? What are you saying? I'm like, oh, okay. Yes. We like this age. Yes. I was just so thrilled that my daughter finally told me I could have a boyfriend because for so long she's been like, you can't have a boyfriend. That means I won't be able to sleep in your bed. What does that mean for me? Once she like gave me the approval, I was like, oh, I like this. That's because she's sleeping in her own bed now. She is sleeping in her own bed now. She told me that for the past. Hold on now. Oh, is she not? So over the weekend, I let her, I know I let her sleep in my bed. She's been crushing it in her own bed, gets herself in tucked in, whatever. I let her sleep with me this past weekend. Oh, and now Amber is back in town. You guys. So now she's used to that. And she's like, why is Amber here again? And I was like, you love her. I just, I don't like it at night because I'm supposed to be sleeping with you. I said during the week, you have to sleep in your own bed. Weekends. Weekends. That makes sense. Party on me. When I see her, she goes, guess what? T T, I slept in my own bed. She's very proud of it. Do you make a big deal? Of course. But she said that on Sunday. And she did. So she fibbed me. We have to make a big deal when she tells us cool things. She was so says, so says really into the big deal right now. Yeah, we have to make a big deal for everything. Yeah. She's really funny right now. Anyway, Nick Cannon allows his 15 year old son to date, but teen daughter is banned. So I'm a little confused by this, but also not. I think I may have an unpopular opinion. Nick Cannon revealed he's okay with his son dating at 15 years old, but his twin sister isn't getting the same treatment. There is a difference when parenting a son and when parenting a daughter, I am more protective of my daughter. I 100% agree with him and I say this because yes, his son can date. You, I think you can control your son's actions and behaviors like Nick Cannon saying, do not put a woman in this position. You can't tell your girl like if you're put like who knows, but you can, you know, you can kind of make a roadway to your son. You can't do that with your daughter. She's going to be put into positions, but you can tell your son what positions to put a woman into feel safe and comfortable, but you can't like if he does this, you know, it's a very, I told her odd thing, but you can tell your son what to do and what not to do. You know, Cardi B spoke about this and she's been talking about it on a lot of different podcasts. I think the one I saw, I believe it was with Michelle Obama. I'm not mistaken. But she was saying when raising her son, she is very much teaching him that like no means no. And respect. And that's where I'm kind of thinking that and it's very hard to like, if I had a daughter and I was like, so he's going to probably say this, this, this, this, this. It's like, I have to go through a whole bunch of things of what he might say to do this. You have to tap into the mind of a shitty man or a man that like maybe Nick has been at one point. There it is. And that's where I'm like, okay, he probably knows that. And now he's telling his son who not to be that he was. And now his son will have some, you know, a better chance at what he didn't maybe, you know, broad statement. But I talked to my friends who have boys a lot and I expressed just with the state of the world and, you know, being these men in positions of power who still maintain power after a lot of things have come out about them and these women really fighting to not only be heard, but see something done. And for the most part, nothing is done. So I've spoken to my friends who, who have boys and I express, you know, my concern with having girls. I never expected to be a girl mom. Um, there are things that I have not experienced that some of my friends have that a lot of women have experienced at the hands of a man. And I remember one of my friends was like, I, I understand exactly what you're going through and how that could be scary. She goes, but I have to say, I am so terrified raising a boy because I have to teach them about so many things that are unacceptable. And she goes, and you think that that would be an easy job because it just seems like it would be common sense to like treat people, especially a woman with respect and listen to them. Like, but when I look at a lot of these men, I sometimes wonder like what the mom did to make them think that this was totally okay. And maybe it's not even what the mom did. It's what did the mom allow them to get away with. Or sometimes it's just people are born who they are. Well, yeah, I mean, there's a lot of people, I mean, I'll just say that are incarcerated that did terrible things and their mothers are out. And that's not a, you know, what their kids did isn't a reflection of who the mother is. I don't know. I love what Cardi B said. Next time I see your mama tell her that she raised a bitch. I'm all about blaming mom. I'm like, oh, your mama didn't finish the job and I'm certainly not taking over. Now, so at some point it's you're a man and you know, right from wrong and you shouldn't need your mom to like you agree. Like you raised me now. I know right from wrong. I shouldn't add the age that I'm at or even 23, four, five and being like, but mom, did I do that wrong? It's like, what do you fucking mean? You're an adult. Why are you going to your mom? Or like, yes. I mean, I don't know. No, but it goes back also because you know, I'm obsessed with K Michelle and I just caught up on Real Housewives of Atlanta. It is so good this season. I didn't think I would like it because I did not enjoy last season just because I like what I like. And anytime you recast pretty much an entire show, it's like, oh, this is funky, but you've got familiar faces, but you also have like a dynamic happening that I'm really fricking into. But K Michelle, I've spoken about this song before because it's slaps so hard. Can't raise a man. She talks about raise a man. He's already grown. What do you think you're going to do about it? You wonder why he acts like a boy. It's cause he wasn't raised right before you. Right. So is it the mom's fault? I don't know. I'm a mom and I certainly hope that when Ocean and Sosa go into the world, they're not like, you know what? You suck because you're a mom. Don't they also say that your friends roll the tape too? That your friends are a huge, like. Yes. They're the biggest influence on your life. So the beat isn't what your mama did. It's not. Maybe it's what your homies did. It's just you, you were born a bitch. You were born a bitch. You were born a bitch. And you just didn't want to listen because let me tell you something. I know a lot of people that were in the rooms at Eastwood Elementary when they told us to be drug free. A lot of those people did not listen. Okay. What was that called? They did not listen. Care. Dare. Dare. The Dare program. Anyway, back to dating. I feel like my, my mom, our mom and dad were very chill. Like, do you ever remember mom or dad saying like, you can't date until this time? No, but I assume they looked at me and thought I don't need to worry about him dating anyone. So we'll just keep it gone. Have fun kiddo. Because you had to sit on books to like pass your driving test and stuff. Yeah. And dad, here's the one thing about dad that I really just have, you know, A bone to pick. Yeah. What is it? I liked different hairstyles, but he was like, since he had no hair, he was Mr. Toup. For a while. We were like, you got to give it up. Yeah. We got to give up that Toup dad. He'd like, he would look at me and go, Hey, Easton. And then fold it back down. I was like, all right, let's just fucking get rid of it. And how this is just, all right. I don't even know where I'm going with this anymore. You're into. Oh, because he had no hair. Yeah. It was like, your hair is amazing. So I just had this long, stupid, bushy curly hair. Then I looked like a Q tip. And my dad just made me have it because he didn't have hair. So I looked like a geriatric fuck at school because my dad didn't have hair. You did not like geriatrics. People who would look geriatric are usually bald. What are you talking about? You're making no sense. I think you're upset that you couldn't do cool things with your, what, that's why you have dreads now, right? You did what you could never do that you wanted to do. I didn't even want dreads then. No, but I just like, I wanted like a cool like fade on the top and my dad, dad would go just with all that great hair while you keep cutting it. It's like, Jesus, are you trying to live through me? Yeah. Well, he did. He did. It's like when Michelle tells me she's going to cut her hair. I'm like, why would you do that? No, don't do that. I just remembered dad. Or when anyone who has like a hairline that's low and they're like, yeah, I'm going to laser. I'm like, get rid of the hair. Why? You know how many neutrophils I'm popping a day. Dad would come out and just like back in the day on the patio and he'd bring me my wine and he'd hand it to me and then he just underage or normal. No, I didn't. Yeah, I was over age. I was like 23 over age. I like that. This was, yeah, I was very over. But 20, like a couple of years before he passed, but he just looked at me and he go, I got great hair. And I just be like, what the fuck is going on? As he just bought, I was like, wow, I've never in my life. Even Brandon, like back in the day was like, enjoy your hair while you got it because Brandon's. Okay, but let's talk about this. If you shave your hair, like you get rid of the dreads and what if, what if I look like dad doesn't grow back? No, I have to imagine a lot of these are not even attached to your head anymore. Do you guys want to see something way, Sam? How did we get on to dating and you're the bone to pick is that dad? Let me let you get a fade. What the fuck is going on? I don't know, but I can't even find the dread, but it broke. There it is. Is it just all, you know what? Oh, I need to laugh. That is so funny. I don't remember mom ever telling me. Another one broke. That's all she got. She's a nothing. All right. Well, wife's like Chandler being third nipple. No, there's a lot like this one. She's on her last dad. I'm sorry. Oh, yeah. No, so that's your bone to pick. Not that you can date. I don't think you can get a haircut. I couldn't get a haircut, but that's why I don't think dad and mom are like, if you were worried about you dating, you see your five foot son and then you see like his friends who are like, you know, normal built and they're like, they're getting the pussy. I'm my son's fine. Don't need to worry about him dating. Diary, what times my spec savers I test? Hi, Miriam. It's in 15 minutes. Would you like directions? Great. Exit the bedroom. Pass the dog's basket. Sit at the kitchen table. You have arrived. Enough time to move pickles. Visitors do make him frisky. Some people can't get to spec savers unaccompanied. That's why we offer home visits, home visits from Miriam's journey savers down pickles, geographical restriction supply. Find out if you're eligible online. I think my first boyfriend I carried around his school picture. Matt Taylor in the fourth grade. Oh, that was my Matt was like my first boyfriend that we'd like hold hands and walk to school. That was in the seventh grade. He was in eighth grade. I remember guys. Yeah. Now talking about this, I don't ever want my kids today. I remember coming into that like my little ass coming upstairs from the basement, just playing video games with my friends, come inside into the main room and her boyfriend at the time is just bleeding from the phase because they just got like a huge fight. I was like, what the fuck? No, I didn't get into a huge fight. No, not you and him. There was a group of friends. Yes. Guys got in it. Took a phone call went outside when he reentered bloody bloody white tea bloody Easton passing out thinking I'm going to go downstairs and play Halo again or something. What the hell? Oh my God, there's a lot of poor dad. I know he's like my seventh grade. And then he was like begging Matt, the boyfriend was like begging my mom not to tell his mom and then his mom called my mom and was like, what happened? Yep. He got his ass kicked. We're rats over here, baby. Well, she was like, why wouldn't you tell me? And my mom was like, he asked me not to. Mom's a fucking real one. No, our family is a real one. Trust me, they have done some things and I. They've kept it on lock. Yeah. Because they should. I do love mom and I do think she is like, she'll take it to the grave type bitch, but also I think she's a type that like she forgot what you told her type bitch. Oh yeah, she did. You know, like don't tell anyone like 20 minutes later, she didn't even know what she was told. You know, it's like she forgot the secret. Oh, little Dory, little Dory happening. Oh, yes. Yeah, exactly that. Mom was always the one who like, if I liked someone, she would, we would get in the car and be like two in the morning and the boy would come out and she'd pick him up with me in the car and go drive through Wendy's and we'd listen to like West Side by TQ. Yeah. It was like the greatest. It was so much fun. I just remember mom's giant car always being filled with tons of kids. Yeah, that was the other thing like back in high like junior high mom. No, she was because we'd be hanging out in like midnight and then most of time all of my friends were sleeping over and they could like come over, but Lisa, like it would be like one 30 or two. It'd be like, do we just walk back to your house or something? Watch this. Let me call my mom and she just go, yep, I'm on my way. She'd fucking make us like breakfast at 3am. She was still a vacuum in this bitch. Oh yeah, totally. No, she was a gem. But I think we also had it like that because we didn't have tight leashes at all. So like we, I didn't worry about going and I had a flip phone. Yeah, I got my first phone in like the fourth grade. I got mine in second because you got yours. So I think it was just like a family plan. Yeah, I got like a terrible one that it was all that existed. I remember using it to call mom from school. That was what I knew was we didn't have a tight leash. Like I never had to worry if I got asked to a dance, it wasn't some like big to do like sit down and let's talk. It was basically like, you know the fucking rules. Yeah, you break them. You take advantage of the retractable leash. I'll suck it in. You're never leaving this house again. And I knew that. So I never took advantage. Now when I got my high school boyfriend, my dad was obviously very nervous because I was 17. My boyfriend was I, I was a junior. He was a senior. He went to a different school. I struggled through that period of time in high school because when I was a sophomore, my friends were seniors that I had really gotten along with. They had graduated. I was just kind of lost. My high school boyfriend comes into the mix. He's like my best friend. We're together every single day. We're having sleepovers. Dad was very concerned about that. Mom said Kent, if they want to do stuff, they're going to do it. Whether they're here or not, they can do it in a car. Yeah, they can do it wherever they want. Like it's our job to just teach her like be freaking careful. We prefer you not do these things, but things happen. Yeah. Please be careful and careful. We were. Yes. And then we all grew to love that man. And I've never had a functioning relationship since. No, he was the only one. Yeah. He would do so many funny things like Lauren would explode and he just looked everyone. And just fucking riled her up more. It was great. He knew exactly how to deal with you. I know. And how sad that I was the same at 17 as I am right now. Yeah. He might have burnt out. You think? I don't know. We'll never know. No, I will never know. Let me tell you, I said going into 2026 that I am opening myself up to being in a relationship. I will not be closed off. I'm not going to try to like set parameters around my life to try and control the situation because I was like, when my kids reach this age and I have this going on, this is the goal that I want to reach. And once I reach that, my kids are this age, then I'll go out and start dating. Let me ask you. No, I'm just going to let it be. Do you, and I know it's very early and obviously you kind of put the parameters when you know the child. What do you mean? Do you have, I feel like, like if you, With Ocean and Sosa? Yeah, like, I feel like when they're 14 or 13, you kind of like, they're a different, they're becoming a little human and you're like, okay. It starts earlier than that now. Talking to Amber, it starts at like 11 or 12. How the iPad's, huh? I think it's more than just the iPad's. The life. The schools they go to, we live in LA. It's a different freaking beast out here. I don't think it's in LA. I think it's everywhere. Well, actually you're right because she lives in Bozeman and she said it's the same type of thing. I think it's just the way that the world goes and this is where we're at, right? Yeah, I do. I don't know how I'm going to be. I was going to say, do you have a game plan as far as the rules? Most people have like an angel in them. Like, nope, you can't date before 16. And like, I think those are great. But like sometimes if I were to look and like you're still at Ocean and she's 16, I'm like, nah, maybe 18. You got to wait. I don't think I'm mature right now. Like that type of thing, you know. I'm going to play it by ear. I have to see how each kid is. I would like to be the parent who is chill and this, these are my expectations. I will give you all the freedom in the world. You are safe with me. And that's another reason why I don't, if they end up watching Vanderbump rules one day or whatever it is that I was on my social media, Googling me, I'm fine with it because they're going to see that their mom has lived some life. When I am talking to you about drinking, how the way you carry yourself in the world. By the way, a lot of these things you just have to experience. That's part of the growing up process is you act a damn fool. You're immature. You do things that you shouldn't do. And that's what kind of builds you into the person you are to go out and have children. And then you decide how you want to raise them. I want my kids to know when I'm telling you these things, there is never any judgment. You can come to me about anything and everything. If you have, if you are drinking at a party and you're in high school, I know that those things happen. You fucking pick up the phone and you call me. I will not ask any questions. I will be there. Like my job is not to shame you or judge you. It is to provide you with a life where you feel safe taking care of and guided the moment I feel that you are slipping away. I will fuck up your world. That's what it is. Good luck, Ocean. Good luck. What about Sosa? Sosa seems terrified of everything. She doesn't want to do much but cry. Oh, she is me. Yeah. She had her, she was eating this morning eggs and she had her and stuffy. Yeah. And you tried to get it away from her? Oh, I just got it away from her and put her eggs down. And then she did, she was like this for three minutes. And I was like, are you all right? Right when I moved her home. Oh my God, what is going on, man? Did she get that stuffy back? You fucking better believe it. I know, but I'm trying to teach her that like, now I'm doing this thing where if I do something to her, I'm like, you got to get over it. You got to get over it. I'm not getting it back to you. And then after like five minutes, I'm like, Here's the fine. No, she won't give up. And then it kind of stops for a second. You look identical to her when you do that. She's, I don't know, man. This kid, she's real. All I want to say at the end of this bonus is to my parents, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You have to endure survival of the fittest. Put them on you. Back to the point. I think I like where I agree with him with who? Oh, Nick Cannon. Jesus Christ. Oh yeah, the whole reason why we're talking about this. I do too. Because you can control the boy more. And I think if you have the conversation with the daughter though, if you're like, here's the deal. You, this is why I don't want you today. Let me explain. Do you still feel the need? Do you still like somebody? Do you like him enough that you would feel comfortable with me meeting him? Cause that's the way I would feel comfortable. How do we come together and be a team to make sure this guy, to make sure this guy is not going to like mess around on my watch. Like I'm your dad. I'm your protector. I know how, how dudes think. So I'm going to protect you. No dating. Yep. Okay. I think there's more, I think there's more of a gray to it, not so he can date you can't. I think a conversation. I guarantee they took him very out of context. I guarantee you sat down and said, I know shitty dudes. And this is why you're not dating. You're the shitty dude that I can actually control and make decent. He's his daughter. That dudes are shitty and I really can't control other dudes. So right now I'm in protecting mode and you're not dating dudes because they're shitty and I can't control those. She's just going to date behind his back. She's just going to get a boyfriend behind his back. But you don't know that maybe he has done it to the point where he's like, you know what, maybe she has talked to a couple of people and he's like, these are men, you don't date. I don't want you dating now. Okay. I don't know. We don't know the full story. And he's got like 30 kids to father. And he is a great father from what I've seen. Yeah, we don't know. But I'm going to say if he is as hands on as everybody, the internet says, I guarantee his daughter has a good relationship with him. I think this is Mariah Carey's kids. Yeah. And I guarantee Mariah Carey is probably in that bitch saying, no, I fucking know guys do, you know? And then she's like, I dated your dad. Yeah. And that's what we're going to not have you do. Oh, and then your son, you're not going to be your dad. So that's what we're not going to have you do. Things just got hella sticky. Now I'm relating on a whole different level. Oh no. My mind is wandering. Oh no. Oh no. She doesn't have control over it. My mind. Yeah. Today I do, baby. We're back. I don't give it. Oh, we are so weird. You've been in like a lazy river. And they're just bouncing off walls, getting stuck at points. I was disoriented. Can we just let it go now? I want to move on. I've lived in this for two weeks. Same. And now I'm over it. We're all over it. Like I don't honestly, I don't even give one shit about it anymore. That's how good I feel today. I went from giving all the fucks in the world to like, wow, I woke up with not as feeling inside. We're not even existing. I don't even know who you're talking about. Anyway, love you guys. Hope you enjoyed this bonus episode. I'll catch you guys again on Wednesday for a regular old episode. Remember an unlikely affair with myself and Amber Childers airs every Thursday night at 9pm. It drops wherever you get your podcast or you can catch it Friday morning. Love you. Bye. Bye. White. True white. Pure brilliant. What's the best? White. 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