The Worst Finances In Financial Audit History

In what fucking world did you guys think you were ready to bring in a child into this world? Mindset is that. Oh, you weren't paying them. Your mother was. But they were still being paid. No, that's not the point. If you guys can't even survive on your own, how the fuck do you think it's time to be parents? We were paying the house. You weren't. Your mom was. Are you not able to understand this? Pay the water. Pay the electricity. What paid it off? I haven't seen paid it off ever! Where's the pay off? Show me the pay off. I don't see it. What are you talking about pay off? You're a fucking dumbass. How can you tell me you're paying? Where's the pay off? It pays off. You pay. You pay. What? You said that's- No, it literally does not show up. It does not show up. You fuck. You fuck. Hey, child in there. Your mother's fucking good luck in there. You're fucked. The summer budget reset is now live. Get a full year of dollar wise premium plus my four best selling educational courses and a digital copy of my budget friendly cookbook. And my exclusive 30 day meal plan signed by me and mailed directly to you. This is a better deal than we've ever done before and it's only for a limited time. It is 67% off everything. So don't wait until that first pool party to get financially ripped. Click the link below. Save big. Claim your bonuses now. Hello, I'm Jessica. I'm 32 years old. Hi, I'm Angie and I'm 31 years old. We're from North Dallas. And this is financial audit. Okay. Too stiff? I don't know. Are you scared? Thanks for coming on. What? Well, I don't know. You're excited about something. Jessica, what do you do for a living in North Dallas? Truck driver. Wow. Yeah. Samwise. You don't do conversations, do you? No. Good thing you came on a podcast. All I do is talk to her. I'm the one that talks. Oh yeah, and she does all the talking for me. Are you on the truck as well? Yep. Okay, do you guys truck drive together? Yep. Is this how this works? Okay. So how does this work? How does this work? Is it one paycheck, two paycheck? How does this work? Are you getting paid for the route? Separate paychecks. So you're not in the same truck? We are in the same truck. Why is it separate paychecks? Are you not just completing the same route? We're two people. Okay, listen, I'm not a trucker. I don't know. You tell me. Educate me. What do you make, Jessica? I make, I'm going to say 13. Oh, you're going to say, how about what you actually make, though? It varies. But the average is 13 a week. 1300 a week. Very good. Is that what hits your account or is that what you make before? That's what hits my account. Okay, 1300 bucks a week. Okay, very good. She makes more. No, make the same. Okay, very good. We're in the same truck. I did get that fact. That is true. But I wanted to make sure. So that means the household net income is $135,000. 200, well, 135,200 dollars a year. That ain't bad net. And in suburbia, Dallas, now North, you know, the North Dallas area is where it gets a bit more expensive in like the suburban life. But listen. Because when we made more, we do make a little more. Then why would you tell me that number? I would like to know how much you actually make. This is financial audit where I audit the finances of which I would need to know your income before we do anything. Would you like to try again and tell me what your income is? It varies. So I put average for the middle ones. Okay, well, if that's average, you wouldn't make more. I make the difference. Over the course of a year. She doesn't have the average then. Okay, well, you don't handle the money. So how would you know? I would just swipe the card. Boom. That's how you beg to differ? You swipe the card? Yeah, because I think I make more money. I'm about to make myself retarded. You think you make more money. Do you make more money? We make more money. Are we married? Yes. Congratulations. How long? Hit a year in March. Uh, 2021. So five years. Okay, yes. Very good. Okay, well, that's actually kind of low and slow. Yeah. For a less situation. Well, that's good. Well, welcome to being responsible, I think, right? Is that what you were trying to be? Were you trying to be responsible? Maybe. Okay. Oh, you were her trucking instructor. Oh, you f*****g groomed her a little? No, we were best friends for a year. She's her driving instructor. Okay. Only for a month. Were you best friends before that or after that? No, I met her on the truck. We met in Chicago. And you locked her into your semi? She hasn't been able to leave ever since? Well, I was quitting becoming an instructor and moving to just driving regular. And she needed a partner. What kind? I needed a trucking partner. Well, you guys were driving a year together and then all of a sudden, one day we got a little... Yeah, but only trucker instructors get a new student. And then I have to go off and find my own partner to drive with. And I didn't want to do that. Yeah, I was saying you guys were driving for a full year together and all of a sudden someone made a move. Got a little juicy. A little spicy. Just a little bit. A little bit of mild, mild, spicy. Okay, so what's going on guys? What are we talking about? I guess I don't know how much money you make, but... Jessica says this is how much you make. And am I trusting Jessica? I feel like I'm trusting Jessica because at least she looks at the account and being told you don't. You just swipe, right Angie? Swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe. That's what she's seeing some Christmas. She also calls it the magic money card. Never runs out. Wow, that's someone I would want to attach the rest of my life to. Why the f*** did you pick that? That's collusional. Just look at me. What about you? I can't tell which one looks more like a man. I don't know, what am I supposed to be doing here? Oh, rude. Kind of, I guess. I mean, you're a lesbian. You get it. Lesbian truckers. What else am I supposed to do here? That is usually how that works. Another man. I'm not able to. You were the one that just got insulted when I said you looked like one. I'm not a man. I mean, I knew that. You know that? But I did. Oh, you figured it out. Okay. Well, yes, that is usually how that works. The nut of a semen from a penis attached to a man is usually how a woman such as yourselves gets impregnated. Well done on that. How'd you find the penis? Facebook. Do you know about the penis? I do. So you can send it to the penis? Yes. You picked the penis? Yes. We looked into pregnancy. We looked at how much everything was going to cost. We thought about IVF. Way too expensive. We did make good money, but we'll go ahead and continue. Way too expensive. So I took the opportunity to look on Facebook. Facebook? Yeah. Facebook Marketplace Nut. We show up to the... Oh, okay. That makes sense. There's sperm donor groups. Okay. Thank you, Zuck. Providing. Very good. Okay, so what did you find? Not me. So we had to filter through all that because they like... What? They just want breeding things? Yeah. And most of them, they want to do it all natural and stuff. Well, yes. They want to stick their penis inside of you. So we got a... Absolutely not. That wasn't an option. Yeah. So what did we find instead? Still a lot of creeps. So you selected a creep? No. What did you find? He's very nice. Found a nice man. A nice 27-year-old. Yeah, let's see what this guy looks like. And how much did you give him? He was free. There are people that charge like we... What's the point? Why do you do it? To help. He likes helping people. He has... Okay. Well, but the thing is... The incel. I feel like he would do that so that he could like have sex. But like, you guys didn't have sex. Um... Okay, you guys all friends? Do you guys like live next to him? No. He lives four hours away. Okay. So you're going to be a part of the kid's life? Is this going to be complicated? What kind of rules and regulations did you do? You legally approved or is this downloaded from lawyer.com? I mean, it was notarized. Oh, notarized? Officially notarized. Okay, okay, okay. Well, not that they... Not that a notary specifically would say that, yes, this document is going to hold up in accordance with the law, but you know, it validated that at least it was signed correctly. And he plans to give us three more. What is he getting out of this? I'm so confused. He's helping us. He's very nice. So he just wants to spread his seat along all over the world? All over. I think he has like eight kids right now? Two on the way. In that document, it also says you cannot get child support, correct? Correct. Thanks for him. Oh my goodness. We wouldn't do that. Although somebody is doing that to somebody else right now. Well, yeah, no shit. That's what I would be nervous of. Okay, so he's not going to be involved again. So listen, are we even ready for a kid? I don't understand how we're going to do it. You want a different job or are you going to stay home? I don't understand. What are we going to do? We live in a truck all day. Are we long haul, short haul? What are we doing? Long haul. Kind of long haul. We're on the road four days out of the week and then we're home three days. How are we doing a newborn? Especially two because you're going to do it again immediately. What did you do next three? The in-cell and that? These kids are going to be shooting up schools left and right. No, I don't believe it. If we're long haul right now for the next two months, three months, you give birth in three months. I want to go all the way to the end. Oh, you both tried to get pregnant at the same time. How the fuck are we going to do that? You wouldn't be able to do that. For long haul trucking, how the fuck are we going to do that? I'd figure it out. What an answer. Let's know what was your plan, guys. If that's actually your answer, then you're a selfish... You just roll with the punches. No, okay. Well, then you're a selfish... Because the kids come into this world and we're just going to roll with the punches. You don't prepare. You don't do anything. You roll with the punches. You have a kid planned for the kid. Make the kids life good. You got a plan, but not too much plan. What's your plan? What's your plan? You're rolling with the punches. That's your plan. Two works as she can't work no more. You're laughing. That's funny. Your kid's not going to have a plan. Kids not going to have parents around them. There's a plan. She just doesn't know the plan. Oh, she doesn't know the plan. The person who also tried to get pregnant wants to get pregnant next. What's the plan? Plan is one person. We make enough money for one person to work. Maybe. I don't know what's your rent. Our rent? 1,200. Yeah, you could do one person. Okay. I have a stack of debt. Why are you in debt if you make so much money? What's the plan? Roll with the punches. I'm telling you. She said she knows the plan. You never heard of a plan in your life. You go as the... Is that how you got here? Yeah. I don't think that worked very well. You're on financial audit. What is the plan? With our first one or with more to come? Let's hear both. The first one, my ideal plan is... Roll with the punches. Stop saying that. I'm going to still do trucking. But local, which I'm... be home every day and I want her to get a job that at least makes $500 a week. Are we taking care of the kid then? If we're both still working though. Full time. There's daycare? You're doing immediate daycare at zero. Okay. You have to be able to afford that. I could have. Maybe my brother. That's a good breast feeder. Pump into the fridge. I know, I get it. I'll be working overnight. Roll with the punches. You take care of the kid at night? I'm going to bed sometime. You have to sleep. That's what I'm saying. When's your time with the kid then? What? You're literally a couple months away from giving birth and we have no idea how the f*** we're taking care of this kid. That's kind of selfish. Just because you guys wanted to have kids. I want everyone to have kids who wants to have kids, but you got to at least think of what the f*** life looks like. And you're immediately going to get pregnant again? It'll hurt, yeah. And also, how you the one got that pregnant? When you both took the nut. Mine didn't hold clearly. Hold? Yeah, it didn't take. It's a little different. You're talking like miscarriage, I don't know, hold? Yeah. You got a miscarriage? No, you got a in, you put it in, side. Okay, so we have no plan. We do. I thought my plan was pretty good. You've rolled with the punches. How are you seeing the kid? How are you taking care of the kid? I feel like we don't have anything here. How many kids are we going to have? We want three. We want three. But if it comes down to it, we'll have to have four. If we have four boys. Yeah, but she wants to stay at home and be a tradwife and being told. Mm-hmm. She's tried it before in the past, and it did not work. With who? With you? Yeah. Who else? Well, what failed? I don't know. Someone you may have been with before. What the f*** do you think? I had to make her get a job. Absolutely not. I don't know your life. I don't know you. Shut the f*** up. You have not just creature. So what failed? Laziness. She didn't keep the house clean. Oh, so you wanted to be a... Okay, that's not a tradwife. You were just a lazy f***. But I had other things. What other things you had? I was making carpets. Oh, making carpets? Yeah. I was trying out tools. That's a classic tradwife. Trying to find something to do. She has a lot of hobbies. That's not a tradwife. That's just you doing what you want to do and having her work. No, because I could technically make money. Let me guess. You call yourself an entrepreneur too? Yeah, I do. Yeah, what's your little entrepreneur? I told you, making carpets. Customs shoes. Custom shirts. Custom shirts. We've made... Zero. That column... It's over. Uh-huh. It's a working progress. They're just hobbies. Uh-huh. Yeah, and that... That sounds like that's all there'll ever be. I don't want to shit on your dreams, but you've made zero in how many years? Of making carpets. Actually, I only started a couple months ago. You want to start a pop shop in Texas? That just got pretty much extra. We got a hot shop. We did start a hot shop business. It's where you get a dually truck and your own trailer and do loads yourself. And what have you made? Nothing. It failed. Lasted like four months. Nothing. You didn't even make a dollar? We made money. Did we not make money? All those trips we took all over the place. For as much money we invested into it, we did not... We only did it for a couple months. We're not going to make back what we put into it though. Maybe if you helped a little, we would have made a little more money. What did you want me to help? Booking the loads, coming with me on trips. Did I not sit there? It was your idea to start the business. I have a lot of ideas on a lot of business stuff. And that's why I stopped listening about your little different businesses. Everyone has the... Everyone could have the idea, oh, I'm going to make shoes. We've done that. Humans have done that since forever. What do you... I'm sorry. You don't have a unique idea. What's your unique idea? Everyone has picked up things and moved them. What is your unique idea? What are your ideas on business then? You're not going to do anything if your idea on business is... I'm going to make shoes. I could try. No one does that. Try what? What are you bringing to the marketplace that is actually unique? Nothing. Nothing at all. Then stop. I have a lot of ideas. Ideas? What are your grand ideas that are not already being done the exact same way but better? Do you have any idea? You know, I'll come up with it. I will. I will come up with it. It's a wonderful strategy. It'll just happen. Maybe my kid would want to join this wonderful idea. Oh, poor child. What the... What do you mean? What are you going to make them make carpet? No, not carpets. That's another... That's your thing. Your freak making carpets close shoes. You couldn't even... You somehow... In the world of the Dallas metropolitan area about to be the third largest metro in the country, could it make money moving things for people? Why would I want to move things for people in business? Why did you guys do a hot shop? But that was for like... I'm thinking... You're thinking of moving people's houses. Not like... What were you moving? Tires. Good. And you couldn't even do that in the fourth largest metro in the U.S. about to be number three. You couldn't even make that work there with millions of people. How the f*** are you going to be able to do anything? But that would... That's out on the road. That wouldn't benefit... You're just going somewhere to pick shit up. What do you mean not benefiting anything? It's money. We were all over the place, all over the U.S. She told me the other day she wants to be a barber. Yep. Oh, here be a barber. Very good. Yes. Again, that's that... You had a business idea that you wanted to do something different. My carpenters are great. Yes. She loves... Munching on those carpets. We know. Listen. You love switching... Switching on everything, like jobs and everything. She gets tired. I get bored. I'm all over the place telling them... You got a lot of f***ing kid coming in a couple months. You don't get to choose this anymore. I may have a kid coming, but... I think it is. I have a lot of ideas that he could potentially think that it might be a good idea. Hey, maybe let him be an entrepreneur then. How about you take care of the roof over his head today? Easy. I joined him. I had the money. Fine. In 18 years you can. Today... Make sure there's food on the table. Today. Well, I guess I'm going to have to just still truck drive until I find a new idea to come up with. It's not about ideas. You're not coming up with ideas. Cutting hair is not an idea. What do you think you are? Dude, you're the laziest entrepreneur I've ever heard or the most f***ing... I can't tell. You're not an entrepreneur. It's new to me. Cutting hair doesn't mean it's new to humans. I'm trying to be... Other people cut hair. I can't just think out of the box. I can't just be like, oh, I want to... Then you can't be an entrepreneur. It's a simple set. Cold hard truth. If you can't think out of the box, you are not an entrepreneur. Give up. No. I refuse to give up. But you're not an entrepreneur. If you can't think out of the box, you will never be successful. Can you help? Help me. What do you want me to help you with? What are you talking about? I want to do something that will benefit our lives and our kids' lives. You make money. You guys are over six figures net. You guys do incredible for the metro, for the country. Work and be on the road and never see one again. You want to do something you want to do. But I thought you guys were three on, three off or whatever. I don't know. Right? Okay. You're going to see the kid. No. No, I want to go to games. I want to go to his games. Okay. Well, first of all, he's going to be zero. He's not playing baseball this year. So, like, you have some time to do a transition into some different kind of trucking or something. Yeah, but at zero, he's even going to be smiling, seeing people, seeing colors, seeing me. At zero, and if I'm on the road. Bro, if you're working three days, you're going to see a lot of smiling for four. You don't just work three days. You're off three days. And if you're off three days. I mean, you could request to work only three days. Well, there you go. You'd get a good amount of money still. No. You guys already make a lot of money. You can take a little pay cut. How? With what she just said. You're so stupid. She just said, what? We have so many bills. What did you can't do? What's your plan? What it makes sense then? Because your plan was based on basically only paying for rent by one person stopping working. No. She said you have a lot of bills. We have a lot of bills. I just need her to get a job that's going to make her just $500 a week. What is this $500 a week thing? What is this? What is this target? What have you done? Does she even know this? Does she understand? Make the logic work for me. I've told her. I've told her that. Tell me. 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That's half of what we're making now. That's three days of work. That's half of what we're making now though. But I still need to get you guys afford half. She suggested no with the bills. You got listen with the conversation that we just had about this business stuff like what the f... How do you guys even have conversations around the finances in the house? What does it look like? What do the conversations look like in this house? Basically I can't spend this money. She starts talking about her business adventures and I shut them down. What do you do? No, tell me. I want an example. What do you do? Give me a reasoned conversation about it. Okay. I want to be a barber. No. What about tattoo artist? No. Why? Because you've never even drew. You've never drawn nothing and not drawn. You gotta teach yourself how to draw. You gotta you learn. It's like a learning process. And then barboring you've never cut in hair. I actually... I did too cut your hair. Out on the truck that one day you were like oh I need you to cut my hair. What did I do? I bawled it. I bawled you. That's not that's a bawlity that doesn't require skill. I feel like two toddlers are having a conversation. This is how it looks in this house. When she talked... What the f*** this is like a grade school conversation. What do you expect? An adult conversation. We just had one. About a job. It was a grade school conversation. I cut your hair on the road. Didn't you see when I took out my scissors and started to snip and I disagree. Oh, good rebuttal. You? Well thought out. Very nuanced. I am. You are... What? What are you? I just think that I... You guys need to get out of the cabin, man. Why? You can't talk. I talk to people on the phone. I talk to people in the shipper. In the shipper? Yeah. I don't know what the shipper is. Where we go to unload the truck. Okay, so okay, the shipper. Very good. I know what a shipper is. I talk to all those people. Glad I learned something today. Okay, so that's... conversation around the job. Sure. What about when it comes to spending, budgeting, our goals, everything like that. How do those conversations go? Who is what? Because I know you blame her for the debt. I was just typed that you blame her for the debt. Does she even know you blame her for the debt? Angie, do you even know that she blames you for the debt? No. No? Okay, so what are the conversations that happen? I need insight. I need insight. And how would finances are communicated in this house? It's literally, I want to... Hey, can I buy this? You always ask for everything. Not for everything. Then what are you saying? She sends me to the store. And I'm like, oh, this is cute. I'm going to get it. Cute. What's cute? Baby clothes. Okay. And I'm like, oh, I'm going to get it. But me, I'm like, oh, no, it's too expensive. She'll be like, no, don't do it. But I'm just going for cuteness. I don't care if it's... Jessica, what do you think about this? How do you communicate back? How do you communicate back? Because my communication would be divorce and murder. But what would yours be? No, never. You wouldn't murder me. Okay. How do you communicate back? I just could just assemble. No. That's it. And there's no pushback. There's no worries. Why are we in debt? What are we struggling with? If you can just say no, and you're the financially responsible one, you can just say no. She's like, okay, then why the f*** are we struggling? You guys make a shit ton of money. If you've been pregnant for, what is it, seven, eight? I forgot. Seven. Seven. Seven months. Why is this not improving? Why is this still bad? Why is the most recent statement f***ing? Why? Because you have a kid coming. And if you can just say no, and she's like, okay, no keys, then why the f*** are we in this situation? We just started taking over the bills. Yeah. We, from? My mom. What bills? What do you mean bills? The house. The house. Where's the debt you're in? Was it your mom's debt that you took over? It is. What? All your mom's debt. You don't have any debt. Well, the thing is, when we started working... What the f*** are we saying? We had debt. So why are you trying to gaslight? What the f*** are you talking about? Trying to improve? I did not know that we had debt. You didn't know that you had debt? Yeah. This is our second month. This is our second month. This is the second month doing our own bills. As bullshit spending was $1,750, regardless of debt, $1,750 without the door and just bullshit nothing, not improving life at all. We did our house. That's not miscellaneous bullshit. Stopping in a gas station, stopping in McDonald's. We used to smoke. I'm glad you don't, because you're pregnant and you almost were. If you want a high-five for that, I ain't going to give it to you. That's kind of basic. You sure? Good, you don't smell like an nasty piece of shit. Well done. Proud of you. You woke up to what we all figured out. Gas? Who said that's not miscellaneous bullshit? That's transportation, of which is very expensive. In fact, it's 38% of your spending. I'm not complaining about that. I might, but I'm not. Because I assume you guys fill your own tanks because you're independent contractors, right? No. How's the transportation so expensive? Probably going into truck stops and buying food and stuff. No, no, no, no, transportation. You say it's not gas? Oh, would it be like a car bill? Well, sure, we'll have to go into it, but I would like to hear... I was thinking maybe you would have any kind of insight into your finances. I'm telling you, this is our second month ever paying our own bills. How, guys? I'm so confused. We're 31 and 32. What the fuck is wrong with you guys? Well, even one... Her mom. Her mom. Okay, why were you never independent in your life even before her? I'm irresponsible. I don't even have a bank account on my bank. How are you surviving before her mother? My parents. Your parents? So you guys are cuddled children. And yet you thought it was time to bring a child then of your own? We grew up. Pathetic. No, you didn't. Growing up wouldn't be this. Growing up wouldn't be putting more on a credit card than you spent. We still have a house over our head. We still have electric on. We still have water. We grew up. From our parents... Well, not... I don't know about you, but from my parents doing everything for me, you know, to us, well, me now, paying stuff on our house, I think I grew up. You're pathetic. I'm calling your parents in the post-show. Oh. Well, my mom died. So you can't. My mom died last month. That's why we're taking over. Yours is dead too? Yeah. Guys, everyone's getting dead parents. I'm sorry. That's hard. Your father? You can call him. If you want. Okay, got one. We found one alive. Don't come on. He doesn't speak English. I'll call Ace. No, we wouldn't do that. We wouldn't do that. We like Angie's parents. He's in Mexico. Yes, yes. So you could call them all you want. We'll just drone them instead. No, we make jokes. No. So that's why I'm saying it's only been two months. I'm sorry to hear that your mother passed away, by the way. Since we've taken over. Yeah, she was in charge of paying all of our bills for us. So that's why I stopped two months ago. I didn't even know that was that much money. So all of it was that much money. We just gave her a flat. I'm being told we're going to call your sister because your sister's living off you guys milking off of you because she was milking off a mom. Now mom's not there. Now she's milking off of you guys, which doesn't even, I mean, I don't even know if that's your, yeah, sure, she might be like a bitch sister or something, but you guys are f***ing your own lens regardless. Even without her, you guys are just destroying it by spending more and more money. You guys are afraid to confront her? To get her out of the house? Why are we afraid? How can you be afraid? She used to beat me up when I was little. Okay, well, you're certainly not little. I'll tell you that. Fight back. What? That's, that's mean. Yes, you're on financial audit. Okay, but talking about somebody's weight is rude. Did you not watch the 15 minute onboarding video where I said I'm going to make front of your weight and if you don't like that, tell me. Oh yeah, I did. Oh, that's weird. Okay, so you're not tiny anymore. Hit back. No, it's not worth the headache. She grew up. She'll stop talking to me for a while. Good, right? Isn't that what we want to get her out of the house? Oh, just because she stops talking doesn't mean that she's going to get out of the house. Okay, who owns the, do you own the house? It is our house. No, do you own the house? Like, is it in our name? Yes, yes, yes! Who owns the house? Good death, third time. My grandma. Her grandma. Grandmother's perspective on this, then? She's not alive. She's dead. My mom. Then who would the title get passed to? Me, but not yet, because it just happened in March. Okay, okay. So once it is your house, take your legal authority and kick her the f*** out. Right? Why are you afraid to confront her? I'm so confused. Because she's violent? No, it's just that's not worth the headache. Okay. Okay, then what's her, what's the problem with her being there? If that's not worth the headache, then she's not going to be that big. She has a dog. Wolf, like, okay, welcome to American households. Her dog is mean. Okay, she has a bad dog. Yes. That's our big issue for wanting to kick her out? Well, she leaves her dog at our house and then she just leaves for days and then comes back. And you've brought this topic up? Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. She does her own thing. Walk the way. Then she'll text her. Then she won't talk to us. Okay, then kick her out. You're living with a child. She doesn't talk to us. Because you'll evict her. You own the house. We don't own the house. No, yes, she does. But she's about to. She's about to. I'm saying when she gets up. About to is going to take more than a year. It's going to take a year to get the title to. My uncle's the the executor of the house. He's in prison. What the f*** is wrong with your family? Never said our family was perfect. Okay, but you want to move into a new house anyway. So I don't even understand the purpose here. I do. We are not going to do that. Why? Because our house, our house. You've been in that house that family household for. How are we even going to get a new house? Your whole life. You sell that house that we're currently in. You sell it. How the uncle's in prison. Well, is he going to be in prison forever? No. It made it sound like it would take two years. I mean, yes. So she can't sell the house for two years. She could rent it. Can she? Can you? Can't get the sister out. Can you sell the house? You don't have a roommate. Okay, that's not a real answer. It's not a real solution to your issue. You want to move. Yeah, I want to move. Why are you against this? I guess I'm being told this is one of your guys' biggest disagreements. This is our biggest disagreement. What's the issue? I want to move. Okay, we got married. We have a kid. Why not move into a house that is ours? Not a childhood home. I moved out of my childhood home. Why wouldn't you want to move out of yours? The house is almost paid off. The house is almost paid off. It's a four bedroom, four bathroom house. And we only pay 1200. And we live in the suburbs. Okay, well, you'll still live in the suburbs probably. Because it's really old Dallas's. What if I don't want to live in Dallas? She wants to move to Pennsylvania. I want to move somewhere closer to my family. Do you want to? No. Okay, then obviously we're going to have a problem. And also who knows if the opportunity is as good as wherever you are going to be in Pennsylvania. Where in Pennsylvania? It's probably not, but it doesn't have to be in Pennsylvania. Where in Pennsylvania? Then where? Okay, Philly has opportunities. Yeah, but it doesn't. No, she's not going to feel comfortable enough to live over there. I don't know. I don't know anybody over there. No, but that's moving. It happens. Yeah, but it's like she'll never feel comfortable enough around like my side of the family. So how are we coming to any kind of agreement on this topic then? We want to move somewhere else. No, we're not going to move. The mortgage payment. No, we're not going to move. We're not going to move. We're not going to move. The mortgage payment, I mean, that's a decent argument. And I do get that, but I'm not good at numbers. You can still sell the house and then you can walk away with that massive equity position. I wouldn't get the whole amount of the house. So it's not just you on the title. Who would? No, it does go to me, but my mom said that if the house... Said? Yeah. Said might not be enough. You might get the full amount. Pretty honest person. So she said if the house ever gets sold, I got to split it between my brother and my sister. Okay. But they don't get equal rights to the house before selling? We would get a bigger portion and they know that. Then that's not equal splitting. Well, they know I'm paying on it and have been paying on it. How long? Two years. Your mother wasn't? We would send her money. We gave her $2,000 a week. A week? What? To pay all of our bills. Wait, she was paying y'all's credit cards? Yeah. Whoa, you guys are actual children. Why do you guys think you are in the place to bring one into this? Electricity. No, no, no, just like credit cards and basic shit. Not knowing that shit at 32 and you're bringing a kid into the picture? Wait, you didn't even know... Because you always started doing it for two months. I got that part, but you are seven months pregnant. In what fucking world did you guys think you were ready to bring in a child into this world? What the fuck? Irresponsible selfish behavior mindset of that. You wouldn't even know you weren't paying them. Your mother was. But they were still being paid. No, that's not the point. If you guys can't even survive on your own, how the fuck do you think it's time to be parents? We were paying the house. Your mom was. Are you that much of a fuck moron? It's our money paying all the house. But you were not doing it. Can you even tell me how much... So $2,000 a week and how much over those ones are actual bills over your own? Who knows? See, then you can't tell me! Lawyers! Expenses are $5,000 a month, you guys found out on your own. I'm being told. But $2,000 a week being taken from mom, where'd that go? $8,000 a month. Where'd that go if it was only $5,000 in expenses? To bills, to credit cards. We went on a lot of vacations. So your mom would pay for them? So your mom had the savings? Yeah. So your mom was putting it into savings for you? Why the fuck did your mom think this was a good way to live? It worked. No, it didn't work? It did. $460. No, it didn't work. Where'd the extra $3,000 a month go? For years. It went to... Vacation. Vacations. Every single month. No, it went to all this stuff. So every two months you guys were doing a great grand European vacation. Because that's what that could do every two months. No. Then what the fuck are we talking about? Well, we did have a lot of arguments with her of why we're paying so much. Yeah, and she said... What did she say? I don't remember what she said, but... What, and you guys just allowed it and continued? What the fuck are we doing? I think 1,000... 500 each. No, each? No. A week? Yeah. Well, I'm gonna make up for... Oh, I know. There was still be a thousand more than your bills though. I'm like, where would that go? Then you go to save. You can see that 400 bucks. She probably gave some money to my brother. Nice little redistribution from y'all. Brother, sister. Money got taken from you, given to your brother. And also, we were paying for her doctor's visits and stuff. Well, that's fine, but you should be able to... And her insurance. You should be able to allocate how much money you want to be providing to that yourself. Well, we told her to retire and we would... Take care of her. Right, but she's taking the money without you guys designating. How much money do you want to give? Why would we designate where to hit the money go? Because it's your money. You can choose how much money you give. But you got zero insight. You're giving 8,000 for 5,000. You had no idea where money was going. She was just blowing it. And now you guys have zero life skills you're going to actually manage. I'm not good at math, so... I want to know how much it works. I can tell. I'm actually very nervous that you are on the road. Do I have to do math on the road? She's not a good driver either. Your brain is broken. Exactly. One, you're a woman. Women can drive. Can you drive a semi? No. Exactly. You're a female pussy. Well, nobody told you to be that. No, just a common. Now I'm kidding. We love women drivers here. We love women drivers here. Better than immigrant drivers. Do you? Yes. What's wrong with them? Who? Immigrant drivers. Do I what? I didn't say anything that would respond to... You said that you love women drivers rather than immigrant drivers. First, I was a joke. That's why I looked at the camera. I looked at the camera like Jim from the office. But also, too... I got it. Yes, there have been actual documented issues. I didn't catch the joke. Yes, that's why I said I'm concerned of your brain being on the road behind a multi-ton vehicle that's 70 miles per hour. This brain is working. When and where we have not found out. Our truck goes 75. Even scarier. What's the financial score of this household? 0 to 10. 0 being the worst, 10 being the best. I think we're at a solid 4. Oh, we agreed on it. We agree on things. We agree on a lot of things. Good. Glad to hear it. Would you agree that ours is a 4? I don't know your finances yet. I wanted to get the baseline, understand what happens in this household. Now I'm going to go into the portion of the show that you signed up to be on where I go through the documents and then I'll tell you your score in the end. Great. If you want your financial score, it is free. You can get it right now. You don't have to wait an extra 45 minutes to get yours like they do. You can get yours at Calebhammer.com. Take the assessment. See where you stand in the world of finances, where you're doing bad, where you're doing great. Again, it is free at Calebhammer.com. If you do not want to be like them, where they're just figuring shit out now for the first time in their lives, download the dollar-wise budgeting app that you guys should be using. Get your free trial. See if it works for you. Most people take the annual version because it saves a lot of money. When you do, you get the digital version of my cookbook and my 30-day detailed budget meal plan where you can meal plan every single snack, drink, meal, and other things. I'm going to go through the details of the budget. They do the same thing. They do the same thing together. They do the same thing together. They do the same thing together. They do the same thing together. They do the same thing together. They do the same thing together. They do the same thing together. They do the same thing together. They do the same thing together. They do the same thing together. They do the same thing together. They do the same thing together. Otherwise, that comment link in the description below. Let's get into this. Who has the Quicksilver? Do we even know who has the Quicksilver yet? It's both of us. You're both on it. We're not on it. We're not on it at all. It's my dad's card, but we use it. Oh, okay, then what's the- I have it in my wallet. Your dad's card? Yeah. Mr. Mexico? He has. Summer is the perfect time to get your budget in shape. And now that Dollarwise is officially the best budgeting app on the market, I'm giving you a special deal to download, but only for a limited time. When you sign up for Dollarwise annual, you'll get my four-course educational bundle as a special bonus. So you can get financially ripped while you track your money. And normally this would cost over $700, by the way. But when you claim your summer budget, reset discount, you'll only pay $249 for a full year of budgeting and lifetime access to my four best-selling courses. And you'll also get a free copy of my budget-friendly cookbook PDF to download. So you can also get your body in shape too. Don't wait until your first vacation to try to get your finances together. Go to dollarwise.com or click that link in the description below. That's kind of stupid, I'll be honest. But what's not is actually getting a checking account that gives you free money. Free money, we like free money. You can get up to $200 in bonus cash right now. When you sign up for the checking account that I use, chime. Also, it makes your savings grow at a 3.5 APY interest rate. Guys, you can watch Financial Audit and get free money at the same time. Who would have thought? That's incredible. Check it out, link in the description below. He has good credit. He has great credit. Does he? He does. When on a card that is maxed out over $1,000, it's his card, I don't think he has great credit. I don't think you've got it. He never even touched it. He doesn't even know about it. You guys are pathetic. Oh my gosh, you guys are pathetic. No, no, no, no, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I have to pause. You guys are actually morons, if that's how you think this works. Just because he doesn't know about it, or he doesn't use it, doesn't mean it being maxed out over $1,000 over the max, doesn't impact his credit when this is his credit card. Are you guys that patheticly stupid? I have to ask. I have to ask. I know I'm being mean right now, but I have to ask. In no way in this world, you guys think just because he is not the one swiping, that it is not impacting his credit, when it is his credit card. Please tell me you understand that. That's why we're paying it off. No, we're not. You tongue, you dumb. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm being so mean. No, you are not. You are not. We are paying it off. Hey, you put a thousand bucks away, you spent three. You f***ed it. Dude, you have a credit limit of 7,000 on it. You owe eight. Paying it off, go f*** yourself paying it off. You've never heard, hey, child in there, your mother's. Have you guys ever heard of what paying it off is? You spent triple, triple of what you even put towards that paying it off. What are you talking about? It's $1,000 over the f***ing limit paying it off. What paying it off? I haven't seen paying it off ever. Where's the payoff? Show me the payoff, I don't see it. What are you talking about, pay off? You're trying to trigger me. You're a f***ing dumbass. How can you tell me you're paying it off? Where's the payoff? It pays off, you pay, you pay. Look, okay, you pay as much as you need for the bills that month. Which, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. That's why the payment never shows because it was $1,000 over. I thought the limit was 800. 8,000. Just look at it! Just look at it one time! You were down at seven! It doesn't show up. What's it did? Literally, guys, you sent this! No, it literally does not show up. It does not show up. You sent me this, meaning you have access to this. Hey, I did not send you that. Who did? Papa, Papa in Mexico? No, I sent it. Then you can look at it! I didn't look at it. But you can! You can! I know it's not a basket of fried chicken or whatever the f*** you love. You can still look at it! I don't think I've ever looked at one of those. You're f***ing in my life. And I don't expect you to do anything, but you at least. I just found out about that card two months ago. Ha ha ha! You're the one swiping on it! How should we find out? No, it's me. I swipe on it, it's in my wallet. Then I just tell her, hey, it's over the limit. Can we pay this? Bro, you don't even have a checking account. You're 31 and you don't have a checking account. Why the f*** do you have access to this credit card? I have access to all credit cards. They're in my wallet. Well? What do I do here? This, I'm sorry. This kid's f***ing... Can we just be candid here, this kid's... With your not understanding of credit limits or looking at accounts or you having access to cards, you don't even have a checking account, you don't have a plan to save your f***ing life. Uncle who controls everything's in jail and you're spending 3,000 wolf putting a thousand couple hundred towards it. And you did look for one. We're learning. Yeah, it's a learning process. You're learning, you're learning. You're 32. You're 32. And we just... At 32 you could learn about investing in mortgages, but you're 32. We don't have to... At 32 we don't learn about opening a f***ing checking account. We never had to learn before. That's what I'm saying, it's the problem. Don't bring in a kid yet. Well, a little too late for that. Is it? Go to Colorado. No, you can't do that. Okay, I wasn't advocating for it anyway. I'm just saying you guys are... This poor kid. You're scaring him a little, he's kicking. He's gonna need to kick a lot harder to end it. I'm sorry. Oh. He's just f***ing... No, it's learning. You learn. Like I said, you roll with punches. You don't have a checking account at 31. I'm your risk. Exactly, sir, you're a kid's... No, I'll grow up. Why haven't you then? We didn't have to. Yeah, didn't have to. There was no need. Why were we impregnating ourselves? Well, you're still getting taken care of. Because your grand- Everything was... You should've died two months ago. Everything was taken care of. You got to protect it seven months ago. Everything was taken care of. That's why. Why else? We had a roof, we had all the bills covered. We gave the money that needed to pay for bills and then some, it was taken care of. Yeah, we have the financials for a kid. Financials, yeah. You're over the limit on this. You have the financials. Yeah, but how much extra money do we make that you were just talking about? That's a great question. Well, here's the answer to that question. You brought in 6,367 last month. I don't know how maybe hours were caught. You spent... Oh, and I didn't even work last month. Well, that's why your income was half. Yeah. And I didn't even... That's what I just said. And that was me. I brought that one. Yeah, you brought that one? I'm so sorry. You guys are so stupid. That's... Cool. Yes, I just said you made half income. Why didn't I even work last month? Yeah, don't shit. But that was all me. You spent 11,000. I don't care who brought it in. Why does it matter who brought it in? Why do you guys think that was a relevant part of this conversation? I'm just telling you 6,300. Because I don't even have a bank account. And I brought in the money. And I have all these ideas for a new job. And I still brought in that. Look at that. I'm doing something right here. I am capable of having a kid. Oh. You spent 10. You spent 11. You spent 11. 11 will spend. So telling me your financials are good, is that what you said? Your financials are good. How much money do we have left extra? What do you mean left extra? That was just last month. That was a bad month. Oh, it's always conveniently a bad month, the month that I have the statements for. How does that work? Shut the f*** up. Bad months. There's a bad month every month. That's how months work. I told you, we went into a situation two months ago. We got ourselves into a situation. Last month. Last month. Last month. Last month. Why don't you work in your f***ing... And even when you weren't, why'd you spend more than you made? Well, I was working, but I got forced on leave of absence. And I didn't even work last month. Yes, you got forced. Forced by who? By my trucking job. Why? Who'd you run over? They found out I was pregnant and they forced me to go on leave of absence. What? Yeah. Makes that make sense? Exactly, makes that make sense. I'm pretty sure it's illegal to do. And technically, I still work for that company and I'm still on leave of absence. Okay, so this is your dad's. But okay, who's making the minimum payments on it? We are. We, okay, you don't have a check to go. Okay. And none of you are author... I just brought in money last month. Proud of you at 31, well done. So who... Thank you. Are you guys on this? Authorized users? No. No, perhaps nothing. It's not on y'all's credit. We just want to pay it off and close it. Which is why you spent 3,000 after putting in a thousand couple hundred towards it. Yeah, but it was the month of March. The month of March. The month of March when I had no job and stuff. Yeah, that's when you cut spending, dumbass. Dumbass. Dumbass. Oh, it'll get paid off eventually. Oh, great strategy. It's interesting how it always defaults to that. It'll happen, not it's happening. 24 years to pay off, you won't be alive and the kid will be out of college. Yeah, but who'll have money? Who'll have money? He will be A-OK. You guys are the dumbest people. Oh, who said? Me. Why? You, the way you process information and the things you say. It's very nice. It's cute. It's scary, it's not cute. I'm not attracted to mentally disabled people. That might be a fetish of yours, not of mine. I'm not mentally disabled. I think it's a Pennsylvania thing. What, no. Well, just because the senator can't read? I've never even looked at... It's because he had a stroke. I've never seen none of this stuff ever in my life. And I still don't. Great mother, you'll be. Well, she's the math person, so. Cause she's Asian? That's racist. Is that Asian? Mass again. White, that's a kid. Your toner's running out. Okay, so you guys have access to a lot again. Okay, so we don't send daddy money to pay this. No, we just pay it for Marco. You pay, you swipe and you f*** this credit in the meantime. We help his credit. Overmaxed out by a thousand. You are not helping his credit. I promise you that. I didn't know that. I should have met that. It doesn't matter if you know it or not, you're doing it. Ten minutes ago, we found it out. Just found that out. That's... You sent me this statement yourself. Don't look at the statement. That is equally... I should have looked at it. Also, why is it just not endowler-wise? You would see it all. It's automated, man. Okay. Okay, okay, okay. Quicksilver. $7,934.89. Minimum monthly payment, 266. Aggressive, especially if we're about to cut our income in half. Again, you won't be alive when this card's paid off. And the interest that accrues on this is insane. It's almost like 200 bucks a month. Yeah. I know, that's crazy. Yeah. I don't understand. Just pay some extra on it. No, she doesn't understand interest. Is that what you're confused on? Yeah. It's the... I'll tell you later. It sounded worth it. That's not even the critical part of this. It's just the fact that you're spending and look at this. None of it is making your life better. It's actually making your life worse. To be clear. How? It's fast food. This is all fast food. Oh, you got to eat. You got to eat. You don't got to eat yourself into the grave. Don't you want to be around for your kid? Don't you want to make it to your high school graduation? We're truck drivers. What else are we supposed to eat? There's not a lot of room. We can't just go to the back of the truck and cook food. Yeah, but you can do these for you and stop in more healthier places. You're not. This is Wendy's and Burger King over and over again. That's all the truck stops. Yeah, that's all the truck stops. Have you been to truck stops? I have been to truck stops. You want to say it's the healthiest. Okay, what are you getting there? What's it says there right there? No, it does not say what your Wendy's order is. Oh. What's your classic Wendy's order? Biggie bag. What comes in the biggie bag? Junior bacon, cheeseburger. Okay, well, there you go. You're not getting a salad. Ew. Don't you want- Who gets a salad? You need like the greasy food to keep you up, to keep you driving. Well, that's going to make sure she doesn't make it to high school graduation again. She already went through high school. Oh, she's a f***ing moron. Th-th-th-th-th-th. I know you're f***ing moron. But the thing is, people like her don't make it to mid-50s. Call me fat again. I'm not calling you fat. You are fat. She's pregnant. She's not fat. No. I can't say that. F***. Anyways, I got this white being a trucker. Who you- Well, she's a trucker too. I've seen other truckers. In fact, my uncle's a trucker, not more, but little bees. I play sports. Yeah, she plays sports. Maybe you should play sports then. That's not you being a trucker. It's you don't play in sports. The thing is, listen, why is it- People ask, why is that a part of the financial conversation? One, there's three. There's three things. One, they're bringing a kid into the world. Can't change the fact that you're morbidly obese now, but that does increase complications. Two, I want you to be to his high school graduation at this trajectory. You're not. Three, it's expensive. The lifestyle you're maintaining. But she eats healthy. A biggie meal is not. That's my order. You didn't ask her order. She's not eating healthy. You don't maintain that. You don't know that? Yes, you do. Everyone does. That's calories in, calories out. Shut up. That is basic math. I'm sorry. It just is. Might be eating healthy, but it's a substantial amount. So you want her to eat salads? I don't know. Let's just start. And the point is, number four, if you're going to do the immense amount of sacrifices that is required to pay off this debt, what is the point? If you won't be around to even enjoy the benefits. So there's lots of reason we bring up weight on this show. And five, let's add a fifth one to it as well. If you are healthier, more in shape, you have more energy to make more money to pay off that quicker. That is a basic reality. But you need money to pay off debt. That's what I just said. That has nothing to do with health. Yes. Usually, healthy people have more energy to work more to make more money to pay off that quicker. But we have a set route. You guys do well. You guys do well financially. But that is an additional argument that could be done. And you have days off, that's more jobs. OK, it's in-app purchases. It's Burger King, Microsoft Payment, Wendy's, Wendy's, paying for a U-Haul, Smoothie King, which is not healthy, by the way, Sugar. Each of those is like 600 calories. It's brutal. They are delicious. They got fruit in them. I get a strawberry banana smoothie. I don't see them putting in sugar. You don't see it. No, you watch them make it. They put sugar in it, dude. Just saying. Timu, Timu, what are we Timu in? Baby stuff. Well, you basically Timu the baby himself, so. Yeah. Guess what it means, we'll keep that up. Going in gets in bullshit. And this U-Haul Lone Star boat thing again. U-Haul, we help. Is it your sister? Twice? Oh, we paid for her, U-Haul. Timu, Timu, Uber membership. Thank goodness. Timu, Timu. OK, we're Timu in a lot. You guys are crazy. We love Timu. I know, you're Asian. You went and you got some bullshit again. What's this? Fru Lottie. Fru Lottie. Who? Fru Lottie. No idea. Great, wonderful, incredible. How much is it? $28.71. Olive Garden, real healthy. Fru Lottie again. Fru Lottie. You never heard of it. Good death. Well, someone's doing it multiple times. Yeah, driving things that make sense. Into it. You paying for it into it, doesn't make sense. That's not your independent contract. Just don't get it. Play Pass, some in-app Play Pass thing. Cube Smart, so we have a storage unit for $82. We have two. Why? Get rid of it. Doesn't matter. Sell everything. It's my sister's apartment, isn't her? Why are you paying for it? Because... Stop. She can't. Well, she needs to get a job and she'll figure it out. She has a job. Then she can. No. Yes. She can't. Yeah, she can. Why can't she? Tell. What? Tell me. She'd rather go out and spend her money. You don't understand what can't is. She can. And you are enabling her just like your parents have enabled you guys. And that's why you guys are f***ing today. Bank of America credit card. OK. Well, this one... Oh, that's good. It was good. But it's not anymore. Now it's maxed out again. OK, so who is this? It's both of us. Are you guys actually on it? Yeah. It's mine. So it's yours. It's not hers. Her credit is not on it. No. OK, so it is Jessica's. Very good. $288.25. 13 months to pay off $25 a month. What's all this? This is all bullshit. I can't believe it. You guys just swipe. That's funny. That's funny. That's funny. Your lives. Yeah, nice gum smile. Going in and getting some bullshit. Going in and getting some bullshit. Going in and getting some bullshit. PlayStation. Going in and getting some bullshit. Los Jalapenos. There's the Mexican in you. $66 there. PlayStation, McDonald's, Little Caesars. Going in and getting some bullshit. What are you going in and getting some bullshit? It's 7-Eleven. Gatorade, energy drinks, water. We live down the street from it. Oh, very good. Buy a ball. Pizza. Here you go. Gamersups. Well done. That is your energy drink, though. You'll be making on the road. You'll be making at home. It's $0.40 a serving with my 10% off discount code Kaleb. Link in the description below. Just go to Gamersups. Get free samples of different flavors. Figure out what flavors are your favorite. Then order those. It's $0.40 a serving. You're making your energy drinks at home and on the road just like you would make your coffee. It is much more affordable that way. Then stop in it and getting a $4 one like you did there. Bullshit, McDonald's. Leia, do right. Leia, Eli, do right. Eli, do right. No idea. Great. It's a restaurant. It looks like it. $19. Fuzzies, Conco, Corals, Duncan, Charles Filly Cheese Sakes. You're killing yourself. You're killing your money. This is embarrassing and you're smiling. You're smiling. This is a joke. You have a child coming in a couple months and this is a joke to you. You're pathetic. You're pathetic. No. You're pathetic. Yes. I got to eat. Got to eat. Make a sandwich. Have you learned your gender? Yeah. Still got to eat. I don't like eating at home. You don't have to. Make it home. Take it with you. I am. You're not. I do take it home. Aren't you supposed to be a tradwife? Isn't that what you want to be? To have to learn how to cook. Do not know what a tradwife is. I'm sorry. I'm not even advocating for a tradwife though. But if that's what you want, that's what it is. I just want to stay home, clean the house. But you wouldn't even do that. And go out and get some food. Oh, you're so pathetic. Oh, we got a robot cleaner. The little vacuum? Oh, how good is it? It cleans for us. It's not cleaning. That's just vacuuming. OK. You got to clean toilets and shit too. And kitchen. Oh my gosh. You guys are never going to make it. You guys are never going to make it. How the f*** did you do? That's why you predatorized her. She was in the truck. She couldn't go anywhere. She couldn't even figure out what the door handle is. Because she's f***ing. And then you f*** her. Oh my goodness. I know what a door handle is. Wells Fargo. That's mine. Good. Isn't that yours and your sister's? Or just yours? Yeah, I put my sister's name on it when I was younger. Because she would deposit stuff into it. Deposit stuff into it. It's a credit card. You can't deposit stuff into it. I'm talking about my tracking account. And don't forget I want you to be on the next episode of Financial Audit. So go to Calebhammer.com slash apply or click that link in the description below. You'll have a great time. And I'm going to roast the f*** out of you. Starbucks is bulls*** and a waste of money. And you already know that by making your coffee at home and investing the rest. So now you need to do that with your energy drink as well. Make Gamer Sub's at home for just 40 cents of serving. And honestly, it literally tastes better. And we proved this accidentally via a blind taste test in our Hammer Elite show, Fat and Fatter. The number one ranked energy drink is Gamer Sub's. Literally, the cherry flavor is insane. Listen, you can also get free samples to see if you like it or 10% off your order at GamerSub's.gg or click that link in the description below. Type in code Caleb. The credit card's just mine. Okay, well you only made the minimum on this. No surprise to anyone. Well, no, it was a couple of bucks more than the minimum. What are you supposed to do? Shut the f*** up. No, you gotta pay more. They say make minimum payments. Who says? The app. Yes, that is an option. That is an option. You married an impassal. But you gotta make the minimum payment if... She's not in charge of the financials. That's very true. She just carries all the cards. She's driving. I know how to drive. I know how to read signs on the road. No, you have no processing ability. Yeah, stop means stop. A green light means go. Got it. I know the gas and I know the break. Wow, there it is. That's everything you need to know, right? $795. It's maxed out. No one's surprised. Four years to pay off. Kid will be four by the time this is even pay off. You made $75 payment, which I, like I said, it was more than the minimum, but then I realized it was worthless anyway because you purchased $95 on it. You f*** it completely. You f*** it. Let's see what do we even get. Interest accruing, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, f*** you, bullshit. Oh, pizza hut. Pizza hut. Thank goodness. Going inside and getting into bullshit a couple of times. Pizza hut. Pizza hut's good. It's actually not. It's like the worst. What's your choice of pizza? Anything besides pizza hut. It's greasy and it tastes like nothing. Are you a Domino's fan? Better than Pizza Hut. What? No. Whoa, it's not 2012 Domino's. Nice. So what's your favorite pizza? Well, first of all, not going to be a chain. I'm just going to say that because there's a lot of good pizza and the chains aren't it. Yeah, we don't have that option. But yes, Domino's, Papa John's, Hungry Howie's, you name it, it's better. Pizza Hut's the worst. I don't think so. Because I mean, yes, Pizza Hut might taste a little better than Little Caesars, but Pizza Hut, you're paying the same price as the actual good pizza places. 7-Eleven Pizza is the best pizza. Wow. Yeah. I understand it. Okay. So you've had a late fee this year. Are you surprised? No. But I would like you to be because that should be a big wake-up call. And it's not a good thing. How much was it? Remember your whole make a minimum to payment thing? That's what avoids that. $25. That's nothing. Oh my gosh. So that's the mindset that gets people in the show and into bankruptcy and losing their children in their house and their everything. Smile about that. That's wonderful. Yeah, well, you got, we got other credit cards. So if we missed one minimum payment on this one, we still got other ones. It's not like it's gonna break us and make us. Jessica, I'm sorry. You picked the wrong partner. Just financially. No, that's one of the leading causes for divorce. That's one of the leading causes for divorce in this country. She just doesn't understand how much it's. We don't argue over money. You have nothing to argue about. You know nothing. You just go. You are... A child. Oh. No. No. This, I'll be honest. I am more worried for this child coming to this world than most any child. This is actually very scary. You don't understand the impact of what is happening here. The child will not have to worry about money. No, that's not how this works. They will grow up in a house where he will be worrying about money. No, he won't. That's not how this works. You guys are so ignorant to this. We didn't. We didn't worry about money when we grew up. Yeah, and it's up for so much success. It did. Is that the argument you want to use when we're talking about this with where you ended up? I mean, you're looking at papers. In your 30s? I'm looking at papers, so. She just looks at how we live. No, no, no, no. I look at what I got. She needs to go through an education plan and then needs to be an ultimatum. And if not, you need to leave her. What? Oh. You guys are not going to make it in life. And then I'm me, an actual contributor to this world that's going to have to subsidize you. What do you mean I'm living right now? I'm going to make it alive, and so is my kid. And why? What did that have to do with what I just said? Because you think that we're not going to make it alive because you're reading these little, in two papers. I said, I'm going to have to subsidize you. Why are things more expensive? Healthcare, morbidly obese. Why is interest in everything so horrible? People go through bank corruptcy, no consequences whatsoever. Boom, you guys. Why is everything so bad? Takers. People that will never learn any responsibility because you'll take advantage of every system that has ever existed. I know, but we've barely found out about this stuff. I'm not working on it. She doesn't care at all. She said a missed payment or a late payment's not bad. Well, that was one. There's a lot of them. Oh. Oh, well, gotta even know that. Pathetic. You guys are why things are bad for those who work. But we work. Yeah, we work too. For now. You already talked about cutting your income in half. Yeah, for when the baby comes. When your income's gonna go down, then you'll get more access to social programs that I pay for, and then you'll get more childcare subsidy. You don't make too much money for a social program. You get your childcare subsidy, you're welcome. We wouldn't even know how to go about getting all that. I was just about to say. It's called the standard deduction, and it will be automatic for you because you will declare the... But don't you gotta apply? No, you would show that you have a dependent. I don't do taxes. You don't do taxes? She does my taxes. Oh. I've never once done my taxes. Taxes, I could do. I think. The IRS will literally take everything from me if I miss $1 in taxes. You guys, they won't even give a f***, and then I have to give you all my money. It's pathetic the way we've built society to just encourage people like you. It's disgusting. It's disgusting. Mortgage. This doesn't make sense. Okay. You passed three payments. I told you what happened. You make so much money. No, my mom died. So we had... You didn't immediately call the f***ing bank of the house you live in. No, we didn't. I didn't know if the payment was due or not. The payments always do. Nobody don't know when. We just took over these. It's three months. We didn't know the month. Not three days. You call the bank. That don't know the bank. I don't even know what bank it is. You look at the mailbox. That's what we just found out. God, three months later. What is wrong with you guys? You can't deal with shit. Okay. Well... Sh. It. Sh. It. Shut up. It. Let me write this down. Shut up before I have to hear your nonsense. You got it right quicker. Shut up. I can't when I have to deal with you. Can't the same thing. Because you're impossible. So you can't do two things at once. No. Well, that sounds like a personal problem. But... Brains cannot adequately do two things at the top. Level. At the same time. Top level? Shut up. Great interest rate. Don't give this up if you do. It's pathetic. That's insane. And then you didn't pay. You didn't even call. Low. Shut up. The balance is $53,351.09. Do not give that up. Do not let this go to foreclosure. I will kill you in Minecraft. Please. This is such a glorious, glorious thing in a booming area where you have an equity position. Do not. This. Ah. So your own room with the payment is $1,240.31. Do not give up this amazing equity position in a boom area. Do not f**k this up. So we're not moving. No. Well, no, no, no. I don't want you to lose the house. You can sell the house and get, and have an incredible equity position. You can do that. I'm just saying don't lose it to foreclosure. Okay. Why are we passing you on T-Mobile? The answer is always gonna be the same. We just took over it two months ago. We didn't know. But two months ago. We didn't know. What do you think would happen? We didn't even know the login. That part is okay, but you can call. Well, we tried to call to lower the bill. And they told us no. So you did call to pay the bill, but you called to lower it? Yeah, we paid the bill. F**k off. Well, you want to lower it. Off, guys. Okay, what is this? That's a card that we just got. You guys just got a car loan and you can't even figure out credit cards? We needed, I tried it in my truck for it. Why? Because her truck's a gas guzzler. My truck payment was $1,300. Okay, so it wasn't a paid off truck. What's the interest rate on this? I can't see. It's not on the statement. You wouldn't know. There's no way you would know. You know nothing. Not even worth me asking. I think it's 12. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. What do you think this car is worth that you owe $25,082 on? I think like $23. Okay, it's worth $16,000. Is that good? No, it's not good. Oh. Asian math filter this time. $25,000? Yeah, but it's worth a cheaper payment than paying $12,000. And you know that's the poorest mindset that Americans have? You know that's what f**ks Americans. As they stretch payments further and further and further thinking the minimum to the payments all in that matters. Listen, yes, this might be better than the truck, but your equity position is horrendous. Likely because you rolled over negative equity either way. But the thing is that mindset right there is what f**ks most Americans paying for. It's cheaper. Do this, do that. Everything's cheaper, cheaper, cheaper, stretching it longer, but then you're stacking more and more debt forever on top of each other, keeping more risk over your head forever. You want to get out of debt as quick as possible. We're trying. Especially, but no, you're not. So what the f**k have you spent more than you made a total try? You had that credit card that was there that you spent money on. You spent more than you put towards it. Try it. You don't know what the word tries. You've never tried anything in your life. You've never done anything in your life. Like actually you've never done anything in your life. So you can't say that. You've literally never done anything. You've been a child. You still are. Minimum to payment is $476, $46. I'm not disagreeing with you on that one, but we are getting better at paying things. No. No. Like no. Reminder, we also are two months in and doing all this. Oh my gosh. I know. And that's f**king something. Whatever. Hey, that's my car. Oh f**k, what car do you have? What car do you possibly owe $46,227 on? Or you're f**king and you have this? I have a 23 Jeep Gladiator. Mahave. Why? Why do you have a $46,000 f**king car? Why do you need that? It was cheaper than my other car. Because her scat pack got totaled. What did you just say? Also your past... So your past due... By four months. What is wrong with you? Four months. How do you call my... Yes. How much is a past due then? Four months. I know, what's the number? $1,362. Normal minimum is $362. No. That payment is $1,300. Oh, so you're okay. That's the payment. You didn't make the full payment. You couldn't make the full payment. So I see your current amount... Yeah, we're doing every two weeks. $1,725, 20. The regular amount due is $1,360. You have $1,362 monthly payment on your Jeep? Yep. Yep. No, that's not the number. It's more than the house payment. Is that the number? The number on screen? They did not send me bins. Is that any of them? What is... Actually, let me double check. It should be in the email. Actually, this is for the Jeep. The Jeep I did not have a bin. Oh, dude, dude, dude. You owe $1,300 a month on a car that you owe $46,000 on, which your interest is probably like 30% or something. No. That's not 30%. What is it? What is it? I think it's like 11 or 12. Yeah, it's still shit. Shut the f*** up. It's not 30%. Shut up! 30 is double... Dude, oh my gosh. Why are you still on the previous topic? I'm trying to move on. Are you incapable of having conversations? So should I start that again before getting interrupted? Okay, thank you. Let me try this again. So you owe $46,000 with the $1,362 monthly payment. What do you think that car is worth? I'm going to say 30 something. What would you say? I don't know. I'll try. What do you think? What do you think it's worth? A lot of money. Okay, $15,990. You got predated. No, not for a Mojave. Might be a little more, but that's what we got. But it's certainly no more than half of what you owe. No more. You're f***ing... Do you guys f*** everything and you're bringing a kid into this mess? This is disgusting. You are easily within the top three highest minimum monthly payments ever, but you are easily the most f***ing ever. So this is horrible and you're stuck and you can't get out of there. You can't borrow the difference. You're f***ing... We're not even trying to sell it or not. They don't like the car. Oh, good. She likes $1,300 monthly payment more than her f***ing mortgage. That's a nice car. Good luck in there. You're f***ing... No, he won't. No, he won't? No, he won't what? That car will be his probably. Okay, I have a s*** ton of collections. I'm not even going to... It's just whatever. Listen, I mean, it's all bad. It's about $1,000 in collections. Who? Both. No, I think that's you. That's $1,000. That was an added up. Because mine's way more. Oh, yeah. Okay. Okay, who has... I think this is a firm. Yeah. You're a firm and your team is... Let's own on a firm. What is this? What is this? This is a different brand. That's Khorna. What do you own a firm? I didn't say right there. What's your monthly payment? No, this is your upcoming payment. I think it's like 20... Okay, total you... What? There's three different ones and they're like 20 each. Okay, total of firm owed is $263.32. I'm going to guess. They're all almost paid off too. Almost, but they're not. 53 payment. But it's all stacking. That's what your mindset's broken. It's stacking. So, Khorna, 100, 116. What are we Khorna-ing? TVs? No, it's eBay. Oh. TVs multiple? We have a 100 inch TV. That's already paid off. Why do you have a 100 inch TV? You guys are so f***ing man. Just to play Fortnite. You get to see the people really big when they're really far. So you can shoot them. So you can shoot them. What are you doing? We got anywhere from 100 inch to a 75 inch. You know that actually goes against the gamer mindset, by the way. Why? You actually want relatively smaller screens. I'm blind. So you have to analyze better. I'm too blind to see. I need the big games. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. I'm not considering you guys professional gamers. The Khorna... You guys are so f***ing man. Khorna is 262.98 owed, but your minimum appears to be... That is a lot of papers. Yeah, you're behind on that one, by the way. But either way, that'll be paid off in two payments. Shut up. $131.95. Okay. Yeah, so it's not okay. Yeah, well, you probably can have enough in your checking account. Yes, it can when you don't have enough in your checking account. It doesn't get paid to our checking account. When you don't have... Yeah. Oh, you guys are so f***ing man. It's not nothing. I don't know. I don't even know if this is even worth continuing. You guys won't be able to do anything. You guys are starting from negative. Negative knowledge. Like, it's actually so f***ing broken. I don't even know what this is. This is another firm. Yeah, we have negative knowledge. What is this? I think that goes with the other one. I don't know. You have an eBay. This is a firm. This is another firm. Who's a firm? Her firm? I don't have a firm. Is there another firm? No, that's the payment that came from the previous... Okay, whatever. I don't even know if these are debts or not. This is such a f***ing mess. I'm going to figure it out. See, geek, that's a chief scan. This one's closed. It's a closed account of 1,000. So this is a collection that I think Jessica has. 1,326. Pathetic. Okay, and now a checking account. And I don't even have to ask who's because you're a literal child at 31. And it's disgustingly pathetic. You have 131 in your checking account. Yes, you probably bounced the one point and had a payment that failed. What? Well, you see Cheeseburger? What? Burger King, Taco Bell, went outside, got some bullshit. Went some bullshit. Uber, Amazon, Amazon Sonic. Do you see how you just destroy your body and your life and your finances? It's me. I have the cards. You see how you just destroy your body, your life and your finances? Shut up, both of you. No. You have a child coming in a couple months. Apple bill, ATM withdrawal. Who knows where that $100 went? Water burger, Patreon. F*** off. Ancestry. What? You want to figure out if you're Asian or not? Going out to eat $45, Apple bill, stopped at the negation, got some bullshit, used gamer subs. It is so much cheaper and it tastes better. Photo print online. What are you doing? Zell on our money, ATM withdrawal, 242 knows where. When is I got some bullshit? Used gamer subs, Amazon, Apple bill, PlayStation. I think somewhere in your town, Uber and Amazon, donuts, Subway, Patreon. Google, Hulu, Netflix, Subway, premium. This is so f***ing ridiculous. Wait, who has spank of America, though? That's mine. You have two checking accounts? No, it's our savings. Oh, our savings that only went down. That's good. Okay, so this kid is going into a savings collapsing household and then our Wells Fargo savings went from 1,600 to 25. Yeah. Oh my. Our reputation. Oh, that's more important than our kid. He's going to be taken care of? No, that's not how this works. The world is not just sunshine and rainbows. It's not, I don't want to boomer this, but like, this is, that's not how this works. You will be okay. Oh, wonderful. You hear that, kid? We just took over. No issues. We just took over. That means nothing. You drained your savings to go on vacation. Yeah, that was in a vacation. No. What was it? We went to Mexico for my mom's last, last day on Earth. She was in Mexico. No, we took her from Texas to Mexico. Okay. Well, listen, I can appreciate that more. Because that's what she wanted? Yeah, I can appreciate that much more. I can appreciate that. And you guys make enough money to be able to fund that. And so you would immediately in that circumstance of which I can appreciate immediately replenished savings with the next paycheck is how that works, by the way. So total income, well, it's going to get cut in half, but we'll put a 11,266 for now for the next three months. But your minimum monthly payments, including the mortgage, is $2,217.72. That's not you catching up on minimum monthly payments. That's normal minimum monthly payments. What's your gas, electric, internet, all that combined, all your utilities? How much? Two, four, five, five hundred and fifty. Gas, a room, drive, drive, both of you guys combined, not work. It's going to be 80 for the month. For both of you? We work at the same place. Why'd you say that? What the fuck? Yes, but you told me your, well, your transportation was that much because you're driving. Shut up. Oh my goodness. Phone bill. It was in there. It was like $1,200. No, it's $3,89. Ah! Pay off your phone, switch the helium for $15 a month. We have a lot of... Yeah, you need to pay off your devices and then do that. Actually, it has the same coverage as T-Mobile. It's very similar. Yeah, but we're paying for things that we don't f*****g lose and people. Then get rid of them, get rid of them, get them off. You are independent now. Car insurance, how much? Uh, $3.50. Okay, necessary food. I'll do a little more because you're on the road for a little bit of needing to go out and stuff, but $800. You will be meal prepping mostly. Coolers. Like you just have to. Is this not an option? TP fund? I'll do a little elevated because you're on the road, but I'll do $300. That's way too much. I think I've seen this somewhere. You don't... It is everything else. It is toilet paper. It is toothbrushes. It is tampons. It is everything. It is makeup. It is everything. Okay, fine, $200. That's still too much. I think like $100. Subscri... I doubt it, guys. I don't think so. Shut up, subscription $75. Medical healthcare, are there co-pays on a monthly basis? Yes. How much? I know I still got to pay $1,500 for the... No, co-pays. To give. Just ongoing co-pays. Yeah, I pay my insurance to the... How much is it? $165 every two weeks. Okay, $330. Yeah. Is there a gem? No. Are there pets? Yes. You guys are truckers. Why? What do you have? A rott-reiler. He's five, and he's so adorable. He comes with us on the road. Okay. Pet insurance, $50. How much for pet food? About $50 a month. Anything else that needs to be in this budget that I have not put in? A little bit more for subscriptions. Go for it yourself. We have a lot. And his food... You're cutting a lot. His food's on the subscription. I know, that's all he said. I put that in as a separate line item. You... Do not understand things. She has selective hearing. No, she's actually a moron, like actually. Not as an insult, like she's actually stupid. It's kind of alarming. No, I just don't know nothing about this stuff. Okay, you need to survive $309... Sorry, $5091. $72. I'll give you $500 in bullshit spending. Congratulations. It's going out to you. Subscriptions, whatever you want. So let's call it 5600... To spend. 5600 to live. Let's call it that. Which, when your income cuts in half, is not going to be much less than you have to cut your bullshit spending. But until then, you have an extra... Let's call it 6,000 just to be conservative, left on a monthly basis. Of which, of that, of the $141,935,000 of debt, minus about $2,000... Let's call it 400 of collections, minus the mortgage of $53,351. Okay, so $86,184 of bad debt of the $6,000. Now, if you maintain it, which I would appreciate, would take actually 14 months to pay off the debt. Then you could get a fully funded or a mergersly fund. So actually, I would do that. I would continue these work hours as much as you guys can, even through the birth, as much as you guys can. If obviously, do things that you have to do. But of those months that you're able to do the kind of work that you're doing now, if you follow this budget, you can pay off your debt in 14 months, which sets you guys up for a great success. Call it in a year and a half to pay off your bad debt and get a fully funded or mergersly fund. And then at that point, which is six months of your living expenses, at that point, your kid's going to have a great life, and you're going to live within your means, which is 50% on needs, 30% on fun, which is a lot of money for you guys, and 20% on savings so you guys can have a retirement so your kid doesn't have to take care of you. What a joke. This is so easy to pay off. You guys make so much money, it's just literal children. It's actually kind of pathetic, especially with a kid on the way. This is pathetic. The fact that you guys haven't learned anything until 30-132 is very pathetic, very pathetic. We're going to call this sister in the post-show, and we're going to confront her. And then, yeah, I guess you're getting sued and stuff. Okay, we got to talk about a lot of stuff in the post-show. Let's get the Hammer Financial score first. Hammer Financial score, spending in a budget. Oh, you ever spent zero out of 10? Debt, there's a collection of zero out of 10. Emergency fund, you drained it to zero, zero out of 10, practically retirement. Didn't see anything zero out of 10. Real estate, not on the total yet. Can I give a score to that? I can once you're on the title. Today it has to be a zero, but it will, and you're behind on the, either way, it will go up to a five or six, depending on where you are on the payment status pretty quick. It could be a seven or eight if you're actually caught up really well and it has a good equity position, maybe even a nine. But today is zero. Hammer Financial score is zero out of 10. Get yours at Calebhammer.com. Click that join button. Join Hammer Elite to get three premium shows every single day, six days a week, including the next 20 minutes of this episode, called the Financial Auto Show where we're gonna call our sister. I'll see you there. Hello. We're talking about you, how you live with us and stuff. I am trying to find a place, but I have not fainted anything yet. You as a family are planning a huge trip to Disneyland. I wanted to have some fun. We were thinking paying us $$$$$ a week. Yeah, think about it. I think she's the most f***ing person I've ever met. Don't forget the summer budget reset is now live. Get a full year of dollar-wise premium, plus my four best selling educational courses and a digital copy of my budget-friendly cookbook and my exclusive 30-day meal plan signed by me and mailed directly to you. This is a better deal than we've ever done before and it's only for a limited time. It is 67% off everything. So don't wait until that first full party to get financially ripped. 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