This BBC podcast is supported by ads outside the UK. It's time to see what you can accomplish with Shopify by your side. This is not the future we were promised. Like, how about that for a tagline for the show? From the BBC, this is The Interface, the show that explores how tech is rewiring your week and your world. This isn't about quarterly earnings or about tech reviews. It's about what technology is actually doing to your work and your politics, your everyday life. and all the bizarre ways people are using the internet. Listen on bbc.com or wherever you get your podcasts. You're listening to Wednesday's episode of The Archers from BBC Radio 4. Come on. Where are you? Pick up. Hi, this is George. You know what to do. George? Why aren't you answering your phone? I thought you'd be home from milking by now. I just want to check you're okay. You already freaked me out last night. You were acting so strange. You're not thinking about bailing on seeing your counsellor, are you? Please call me back. So you had a good evening then? You know, it wasn't too bad, even if it was the usual BL crowd. You didn't get stuck with Martin Gibson, did you? No. In fact, he was there with a woman. The estate agent who sold him his and Pam's house. Really? I know. Wow. That's one way to get over a divorce. Auntie Lillian was so funny joking about how she'd describe him in a property listing a low-rise character house in need of some modernisation well, I'm glad you had a laugh there's something odd going on between Dad and Rory though I don't know what it is, just little remarks it's always slapping Rory down I've noticed it a few times recently oh dear that's Dad for you though, one of us is always in the doghouse Anyway, thanks for dropping by with the book. Ah, don't be daft. Hope you enjoy it. Oh, a rom-com about two people falling in love whilst pretending to be married. What's not to enjoy? It would give me something to curl up with on Friday while you and Harrison are making the most of your night off. Oh, yeah. No, it's a change of plan. Harrison's not coming down anymore. No, how come? Alice, morning. Oh, hi, Chelsea. Oh, all right. I said I'd be back. Hi, Chelsea. Hello, Jazza. What are you doing here? Mission's pestered me again. The horse spoke's the once over. If that's OK. Oh, erm... Oh, don't worry. No, no, I'll tell you about it another time. No, no, don't go. But unless you need to be somewhere. Not really. I haven't got to be at the pub for another hour. Oh, then why don't you go and keep warm in the office? I'll be along in a minute. Sure. OK. Yeah. Sorry, Alice Hent. If no isn it a good time Stop trying to wriggle out of it No it fine Shall I just give you the key You can take as long as you want Actually so Jazz has ensured to drive any car They want us permission. Do you think we could take it out for a test run? If I was walking this way, you must have followed me, crept up behind me. It was then you smashed the bottle over my head. George! Thank God. Here you are. Amber. I've just been over to Grange Farm looking for you. Ed said he saw you heading towards the bridal path. Why would you want to come here, of all places? I needed to come back to where it happened. Yesterday, I don't know, it jolted something. Babe. It started to come back to me. But... I have to be sure who it was who attacked me. We know who attacked you. Is he the guilty one, though? I'm not so sure. Now, come on. Look, I don't want you getting in a state. It's why I'm taking you to counselling later. Oh, counselling. You are going to go, aren't you? Um... George, you promised. Look, I get there's stuff you're uncomfortable talking about. All right, but Amber... You'll be fine, though. OK, OK. No one is going to judge you. Please, just listen. The reason you're going is because you know you need help. Be quiet. That's not what I'm scared of. Don't tell me to be quiet. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. It's just, last night, everything changed. I'm sure I know what happened. I can't do this, George. I love you, but if you're not going to even try... What are you on about? I am trying. Then stop with the paranoia. I need you to be strong, like you were with my parents last week. I could never have told them how I really felt if you hadn't been with me, knowing they hate what I'm doing. Amber, please don't. It hurts. That's OK, though. Just as long as we're all right. But if you're going to keep spiralling... I'm not spiralling. I get it. It's hard. Amber. I get you're dealing with a lot. Then just hear me out. Everything has changed. I can't have a child with someone I'm scared is going to flip out all the time. Do you understand? We'll sit and go on. Ah, there we go. Thanks for doing this, Jazza. I know Mum's dead against it. Aye, well, remember, I cannae be long. I've got a case of lager being delivered to the house between half eleven and one. Yeah, I know, I know. We'll just take it for a spin round the village. I know your mum isn't right. Smells like Neddy's bog house in here. You sure you wouldn't rather have a nice wee hot hatch? How am I going to fit a salon in the back of a hot hatch? That's what Mum's not getting. This isn't just about being a mobile hairdresser. It means I could do whole weddings. Bloody day. Parking outside the register office. No, but you remember what it was like before you and Mum got hitched. It was time. First or second? Well, the first. Remember how crowded the house was? Everyone tripping over themselves, trying to get ready. and that was a pretty low-key wedding. Dundee, it wasn't really a wedding at all. Is that McPain in the hedge? What's she doing? Oh, I ain't no clue. Joyce, what am I not? Is it Linda's speed watch thing? Oh, aye. They've got a speed gun. I don't suppose there's much chance of getting zapped in this thing. All right, guys. Mind you, I suppose you can't blame them for wanting to crack down on boy racers, eh? Yeah, so anyway, imagine a big wedding with loads of bridesmaids and flower girls all needing their hair and make-up doing, how much better would it be to have a glam van outside? What? A glam van. And they're not just for getting ready before the wedding either. You can have them at the venue for changing outfits or, like, refreshing your look. Is this really a thing? Yeah, yeah, absolutely. People hire them for all sorts of outdoor events You can charge an arm and a leg Can you no Yeah I got got it all worked out And um day I can still use it to go to people homes What, you really want to drive a run in this? Look, well, if I could afford a little run-round as well, then, yeah, that would be perfect, but... Well, it's taken me 18 months and the whole of college to save what I've got. This way, I'll have a set of wheels and the first glam van in Borsetshire. Well, when you put it like that... Just think what great advertising it'll be when the outside's all painted up. It won't just be a mobile hair salon, it'll be a billboard. You really have got this thing sussed, haven't you? Told you. So what's the verdict? Please say it's not a complete dog. Well, you've either got a problem with your synchros or your clutch. With the feel of the pedals, I'd say it was the clutch. OK. And the suspension on the rear driver's side is completely shot, even though the steering pole's to the left. Yeah, that doesn't sound good. What else? Your ABS warning light keeps flashing on in half. So basically, in your professional opinion, I shouldn't buy it. Well, hang on, I'm no pro. I mean, obviously it's going to take a lot of fixing, but that means you should be able to haggle down the price. Oh, no! That's good, isn't it? No. No, no, no, no, it's Mum. She must be walking back from Susan's. Maybe she won't clock who's driving. Too late. You'd better pull over. All right, but I'm telling you, you pure forced me to take this thing out for a test drive. Yeah, yeah, yeah, fine, whatever. Oh, hey, the electric window still works. Hi, Mum. What on earth? All right, hen, you heading home? Never mind where I'm heading. Why the hell are you driving that? You're a better woman than I am, Alice. I still wouldn't let George anywhere near Martha. I know, but for me, I've done so many things I'm ashamed of. I need to give George the same grace other people have given me. Like I say, I could... He wasn't around for long anyway. He suddenly dashed out saying he'd remembered something. If I'm honest, it was all a bit odd. I guess he didn't mention the court case then. Court case? The bloke who attacked him. He's entered a not guilty plea. Oh. Yeah, Eddie was telling Mum and Kenton last night. It really unsettled them. Really? Well, anything to do with Mark, he always does. Yeah, of course. Let's hope the guy gets convicted. Yeah, fingers crossed. But supposing he really is not guilty? Anyway. Yeah, Harrison. So he's not coming down then? No, there's an operation at work, so he's got to stay up in Yorkshire. Oh, Fallon. I know, but crimes don't stop for Valentine's Day, do they? No, but still, you must have been looking forward to seeing him. Hadn't Jolene and Kenton given you Friday night off? Yeah. Well, so what are you going to do? Just sit at home on your own like me? No, I figured I might as well work. The pub will be rammed. I'm sure a mum and Kenton could use the help. Oh, but that's even worse. You'll be surrounded by loved-up couples. Well, I know, but what else am I going to do? OK, well, I might quickly pop into town. There's a few things I'd like to buy. Sure. And then we'll go to the counselling session together. You'll be home when I get back, yeah? Yeah. Although I can go by myself. You don't have to drive me there. No, I know. But I want to support you. George? Hmm? Sorry, it's just Fallon. What about her? She looks like she's heading back to her cottage. No, I know. You've got to stop worrying about other people. Come on let get home We not going to have enough time to do everything otherwise Actually I might carry on walking for a bit Walking Where Haven you done enough of that this morning I guess but I only going to work myself up hanging around the house I'll be back by the time you're home from the shops. George. I promise. I meant what I said just now. All that matters to me is you and the baby. I just need some time by myself to get my head straight first, you know, so I'm ready for my session later. Don't worry, I'll be home waiting when you get back. You'd better be. I will. Well, all right then. I love you, George. I know. I love you too. I'll catch you later. Tell me this is a wind-up. You can't honestly think the horse box is a good idea. I'm not saying I wasn't sceptical. Sceptical? You said last night she must be pure dead mad. Did you? Maybe, but that was before you explained it to me. Seriously, Trace, I think Chelsea could be onto something here. Has she told you about these swanky wagons? Glam vans. Oh, I them. As if you know the first thing about the beauty industry. No, but Jaz does know a lot about cars. You're going to help me fix up the horse box, aren't you? Aye, but it's going to take a lot of work to turn it into a hair salon. You're going to need a big old water tank for a start. Hang on. So not only has she brainwashed you, She's roped you into being a grease monkey as well. She can't eat it herself, can't she? And if it means Chelsea can kick-start her own business, she's worked that hard these past few years getting qualified, saving all that money. I have no problem lending her a hand if it will help make her dream come true. Thank you, Jazza. And I want that too. Of course I do. I just think you could do so many more sensible things with that money. But if you both think it can work, Ain't going to make any difference what I say, anyhow. Exactly. Stop being such a wet blanket, Mum. Just one question. I thought you were still 600 quid short. Yeah, I am. But Jazza reckons I should be able to haggle them down. All right. And what about the money to convert it? Even if you and Jazza are doing all the work, you'll still need to pay for materials. Yeah, I know. Where's that going to come from? Well, maybe I can negotiate some sort of payment plan with the owner. You know, like spread out the money. That's a good idea. Ah, that'll be my lager But what if the owner It's not for doing that Me and Chelsea will work something out Alright, alright Hold your horses, I'm coming Come on, I know you're in there I ain't no point hiding Open up Well, what is it? What do you want? Lillian, can I come in? This is not the future we were promised. Like, how about that for a tagline for the show? From the BBC, this is The Interface, the show that explores how tech is rewiring your week and your world. This isn't about quarterly earnings or about tech reviews. It's about what technology is actually doing to your work and your politics, your everyday life. And all the bizarre ways people are using the internet. Listen on BBC.com or wherever you get your podcasts.
