Merry Kissmas w/ Jessica St. Clair

Dear residents, due to rampant complaints of sexual harassment, from an elderly woman, we were removing the mistletoe from the elevator, effective immediately. We saw Mary...kiss-mas, so you know what that means. Hello people of Earth and welcome to the How Did This Get Made annual livestream. We are here to talk tonight about a film called Mary Kiss-mas, a film financed apparently by Kay Jewelers, partly financed I should say. And what's the plot? If you haven't seen it, well, it's about a young woman who is in love but falls out of love when mistletoe forces her to kiss a man that she realizes is her true soulmate. I think that's roughly the plot. But you know what? Let's break it all down. I saw that story. Oh, there we go. I have thoughts. I didn't see that. Too much pressure to have you all sitting next to me for that opening. Just staring at you. Just staring at me so I need to get there quickly. Welcome, Jason Jewel. By the way, maybe the first to say, Mary Kiss-mas. Mary Kiss-mas. Mary Kiss-mas to all of you. And a happy blow year. A what? A happy blow year. A happy blow year? What is that? Wow. A blow...a blow... What? Yeah, right? Stop! I'm sorry. Cut the stream, Wes. Cut the stream. Mary Kiss-mas and a happy blow year. No. No. I thought that's what you...that's what there was kind of like building to. And do I wish that this movie had anywhere near that kind of sexual charge? I believe none of the people in this movie have given or received a blow job ever. I will argue and I'm going to have a whole speech to make about this. The only sexual chemistry that anybody had was between the cousins. Oh, yes. The cousin and Joshua. I think the cousin and Joshua from the animal shelter. Deep side part? Yes, deep side part. No. No. They were on fire. We never saw them again. Here's what I'm going to say. Just for fans out there, this is directed by someone who we've covered multiple times in the show. The director of the 12 Pups of Christmas and the dog who saved Christmas. That makes sense. Is this...well, I was about to say is this his first film or hers or her story? Although I don't want to claim this for my gender. But is this his or hers first Christmas movie without dogs is what I was about to say. But there is a dog in it. Barclay. I'm so sorry, June. Do you not remember? I forgot for a second. Barclay our favorite dog. This is Barclay. I forgot for a second. I will say if you don't remember, this director has an interesting type of films that he makes for his movies. He makes Christmas movies. He makes Christmas dog movies. And he also makes a serial killer films. He made a film about BTK and John Wayne Gacy. And he also... See, that's what this movie needed a little bit more of bind torture kill. That's what we had in the Doris Roberts Elevators. Yes. That's where it came out. Wow. No. Jessica, there was an element. You're absolutely right. Yes. Danger. Yes. Desperation. I agree. Sexual violence. Yes. She put her finger in and out of his ear. I desperately wanted her to be a ghost. I wanted her to be revealed to be not real. Well, there's nothing fun about it. There was so much... Everybody in this movie is so weirdly passive in all regards except Doris Roberts, who like a shark is moving through this world from one make out to another. But I will say this. Every character that we meet, you think, oh, well, I'll have a magical part like Doris Roberts. She might have kicked off a magical thing with the kiss. This Santa Claus, the doorman. The pond that she throws a coin into. Yes. No, no magic. The movie keeps wanting you to feel magic and it's giving you the audio cue of that da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. That's like a magic thing is happening. But it's always in service of no magic. And I think the only thing that's posited as magic is the elevator. But is it magic? Is it magic? Is it magic? I got the touch in it. I'm the detective. You have to let Doris Roberts know. I don't want it. I don't want it. I don't want it. Yes. I just did what he couldn't do, which was say no. Get away from me. Which was say no and get away. And here's the thing. I didn't get the performance from Doris Roberts. I really found it fascinating that he couldn't say no. And by the way, like I don't mean to say obviously many victims of sexual violence. Oh no. Don't say no in our frozen. Yes. In our frozen. In our frozen in fear. I don't know how I went down this road. Doris Roberts did say she only wanted this movie released after she was dead because she could really do what she needed to get done. I don't blame him. I do think he froze. But it was very strange because it felt like he was playing. The energy he was playing was like, I don't want to offend a sweet old lady. And I wanted to say my brother in Christ. Yeah. She is dangerous. Yes. Don't worry about her and she can handle it. Yes. Yes. Am I the only one that desperately wanted her and Carlton to end up at the end? Who's Carlton? Together. The fiance. That's wild. I will say. I want to talk about him roughly for the next hour. 800 minutes. Oh, absolutely. British Carlton. No, not British. Darling. Darling. Please. Darling. He was British. Was he British? I think he's trying to play British. I thought when he first started talking, I thought it was a French accent. Or is it actor or is it pretentious actor? Yeah. Although he's not an actor. No. He's a producer director of a film. Of a Nutcracker ballet in Palo Alto, California. Yes. And is being treated as if he's a star. But it also seemed like. A star. And it also was famous for other things. It's almost like if Steven Spielberg decided to direct a. Well, he has the fame of an actor. Yes. He has the fame of a pin-up. They have headshots of him. I think the reason we're thinking that is that they used the actual actor's headshots. Yes. Yes, they did. And what I saw was a man, obviously it was like an early 2000s headshot where he did not have that insane facial hair that I wanted to discuss. Was that an actor's choice? I think that was an actor's choice for the role. Have you ever seen that? It was a triangle shaped face. It was shapes, rudimentary shapes. A line, a square. Is it a van bag? A giant. No, a van bag I think has more of a spike. You might be right. You might be right. I don't know. But it was, it looks almost like a Tony Stark. No, I've never seen it. I think he was trying to go for. It was, so what is that artist, Mondrian? Yes. The blocks. Yes. Yeah, post impressionist sort of. That's what it looks like. Here's the thing. I'm sure the chat is going wild. We guys, we talk about Mondrian too much on the podcast. Well, it's our go to. Every time we talk about Mondrian, everyone takes a piece. Everybody's too wasted because we're talking about Mondrian so much. I do want to know, like, it seems like the show is getting very close to happening. It's a weird day. Can I just say something? Okay. I know they had his headshots and that confused some of us. I believe we have a picture of that. They also, though, put his face on the marquee. Yeah. Was that his face? Oh, yes. Yes. That was great. Like, he was like, hey, it's me. I thought he was going to be the star of, like, as if he was going to be doing the Christmas Carol and he was going to be screwed or something. Well, look at this. Two, or sorry, image two is we have the image of him. There it is. Wait, okay. But this is him with long hair. I didn't know that was him. Right. It is a tricky. There's so many different versions of him. He looks like, from this distance too, he looks like Milo Ventimilo. He looks like Jess from Gilmore Girls. Thank you. He didn't have enough money to do a separate photo shoot of Jessica. Not at all, no. What is his job that he should be, like if he is a Steven Spielberg or even if he's a Sondheim, he would never be on the marquee. So that would be something Steven Spielberg presents. Not only would he not be on the marquee, it wouldn't be just a random candid photo that he's been photoshopped out of and put on the marquee. What you didn't say earlier when you were describing all of his roles was choreographer. Yes. But is he a choreographer? She is someone who says that a lot. Yes. I think so. But the nutcracker is already choreographed. Yes. I don't mean to, I don't know that much about dance. You still need a dance person there. You need a dance person there, but he's not correct me if I'm wrong, chat. Isn't the nut, aren't those dances already, like don't you learn the nutcracker? I think there is probably interpretations on a theme. I don't think that's what that was though. A choreographer is only employed to come up with new dance moves. I thought that's what a choreographer did. Here's what I'm in agreement with June in the sense that I think this guy is pulling a scam. Well, I don't think he is, he is acting as if he is producing the Radio City music called Christmas show. But this is the thing. Why you could set it anywhere. Why put it in follow out? At least Christmas he plays somebody lived there, somebody had a deal with the mayor, somebody had a tax something. Yes. Because I. It makes no sense. Okay. But it was even shot in follow out though. It wasn't? No. Riverside. Oh, Riverside. Oh, Riverside. Oh, it felt to me like Canada all the way. Yeah, no, Riverside, California. I think you can't have a Christmas movie without fake snow. And that's where Hallmark does it right. They shoot on the same lot. They have the snow going. They've got the bandstand. Like I can't do it in that kind of climate. We live in that climate. Yeah. And it ain't Christmas, bitch. I agree. It doesn't. Wow. By the way, can you say one more thing? It ain't Christmas, bitch. You can put as much garland as you want. I mean, my children live here and I'm trying to give them as much of a Christmas experience as they. You're doing your best, but it's not good enough. I will say my favorite Christmas movie is Mixed Nuts. That takes place in Los Angeles and Venice. Yes. Venice. Yes. Yes. So John Stewart is walking with. That's a commenting on the on Christmas. Nature is a way to do it. And I wish you wouldn't dismiss our state and our climate and say like we can't have Christmas or we can't portray Christmas. We can't. I don't think this movie can and I agree with you there. But give us another chance. The movie wants it both ways because they also keep putting people in winter coats. Yeah. And stuff that's supposed to be hats and that's supposed to feel winter. Sweaters. Poor carolers who were not good. Oh, that's a day. Not carolers. They were, but they probably. They were. They were. They were. They were definitely working the craft. Well, they, by the way, they were not working it. They were dubbed. And so yeah, they were definitely. There's so much ADR so many ADR lines in this movie, but it's clear they only had a male voice and a female voice for all the ADR lines. So even when it's our leads and it's an ADR line, it's not that. Yes, I saw that too. It's not them. Just take a look at how off they are on the sinking here. Where's the bell? Nobody's ringing the bell. Nobody's holding the bell. Happy new year. Where is the bell? And those, those characters recur. Another non magical reoccurrence. Oh, well, these non. You're going to see that movie would have magic in it in some way, shape or form. And it or the one, the one possible piece of magic we didn't discuss was the actual nutcracker. Okay. Well, I think I have trauma from the other movies we've watched because every time that nutcracker, I thought she's going to fuck that nutcracker. We've learned anything from Chris's movies that bitches want to fuck nutcrack. She's got to come in. Very course. Oh, yeah. No, but I saw it too. And I was like, fuck it. Nutcrackers. Well, you can see it too. We need to come together. Adjust. Sinclair Craig. Like you like, like you need to have your own Christmas special bitches be fucking nutcracker. Well, you can see because there is no nutcracker. Well, you can see because there is. There's a lot of ADR. There's a they're dropping in like the bell. But like when she saw the nutcracker in the window for the first time, there is an audible splash sound effect. That is just her getting drenched for the cookie. Because didn't we see one where cookies came to life to somebody? Well, a nutcracker came to life. Yes, but I thought when the cookies were there, I'm like, these are going to come to life. Like I just kept waiting for your friends to come to life. Honestly, I feel like I enjoyed the movie less because I kept wanting me to come to life and fuck someone. It's interesting because when I when Paul and I were watching all the actors. Yeah, I actually and I know you felt differently. You better not change your opinion. You better not change your opinion now for these two and for that. All of them out there. I know you and I both enjoyed the main leads. Oh, absolutely. We wanted them together. We wanted them together under the bridge. We liked their chemistry. Wait, the two main leads are main leads. The two people that are in an emotional affair. Well, yeah, I guess she is engaged. Yeah, but it's a loose. It's loose. She is engaged to be married, leaves a planning meeting for her engagement party, runs, chases a man into an elevator and begins to make out. Can you do that? Well, if you saw Martha Stewart's documentary, which I highly recommend, she talks about a similar moment where she was in the twelfth read. Yes, she was married and then she went to Florence fell in love with the food, the sights, the art. That was their honeymoon. You're right. It was her honeymoon. She goes on a separate trip to see the. It's a heartbreak in scenario. She's up there and she's she leaves the tour or whatever. And there's this beautiful Italian man and she makes out with him in the Duomo. And she does not. And she doesn't cheating. And she doesn't. She didn't then and I don't think she does now. And I do think that's the moment we saw with Kayla. Wait, it's a guy. I'm going to get her back on this. Kayla and Casey, Derek, Casey, Dustin, Casey, Dustin, I believe it's happening. I think she got so caught up in the moment. What moment? I know she was using him. She's getting away from him. She's getting away from the woman. She's such a fucking asshole. I agree. She should be making out with Santa. She should break up with the assholes first. First of all, I want to disagree. First of all, if she was good and consent, she was good enough at her job getting him his headache medication, picking up his socks and doing his cleaning. Maybe she would find some love, but she's just shirking off her responsibilities. I did not. I did not like it. I did not like that she was. I couldn't figure out why she was running away from the woman who runs the Chachiqui store. Is that something like also oddly? The German or German? She's the shop owner. Mrs. Tiddly Winkle. Her name is Mrs. Joyner. Now, you seem to be very proud of yourself that you know all the character names. She's experienced in comedy in July. This is like, she's so proud. Are you taking a new note differently? I remember things. This time I remembered them. But she's. Jana. Jana. All right. Jana. Jana. Jana. Jana. Jana. Jana. Jana. Jana. Jana. Jana. Jana. Let's talk about Jana. Oh yeah. We'll talk about Jana. We'll talk about the. The Jana, by the way, is the one who did say they aren't they engaged and she's like, ah, no, and that's not serious. Well, that's. She really like. Because you can't take it seriously. She's in an abusive relationship. She should get out of it before she starts making out with dudes in the elevator. You're so puritanical. In this movie, in this movie, the reality of this movie is that the way people get away from people is to just make out with a stranger and nobody is surprised by it. Even him really. Because. You have a book, The Art of Small Talk. What chapter do you have when you have just grabbed somebody and kissed them? That is like a small talk move, right? I wish that was a rule in our modern day society. I know he has no time to prepare for this kiss. She's not following right. He doesn't know. He's being chased. Does he need to be. Assaulted in my building. Okay, if you're. Are you talking about Doris Roberts or Kayla? No, I'm talking about Kayla. Kayla coming in hot. Kayla is adorable. I love the actress. Just wait a second. Just because she's. Loved. I'm pretty. I know the thing. I'm not disagreeing with. I don't want you to. I don't want you to count out to all of you know, all of them. Love. So you're saying Paul's up for grabs in elevators as long as she's beautiful and not Doris Roberts. Yeah. As long as she's cute and beautiful. I would be very upset. Of course I would be upset. But if Paul were in a miserable relationship where he was in some sort of like hot, she is being kept emotionally hostage. Let's watch this scene. Look at that. She's he doesn't know she's there. Yeah. When have you ever seen a glass door on an elevator? Oh, that. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. What is it? It's above me. It's in the, it is up there. But you don't. Look at this. Why not? There is- One life to live. Why not? Why not? Wow. Why not? Our hearts beat, we have one go round. This is not a dress for her. Wow. She should immediately say, I'm sorry, I'm engaged and call her guy and say, you're dumped. And now they can be in love. Casey. Kayla, hands. Oh, they have not met. Oh, so cool. Yes, handshake. Oh, why not see that ring, guys? I do think that if you're making a movie about mistletoe in an elevator, it should be more prominently displayed. Like, oh, it's okay because of this. Tell us that the mistletoe affects everybody through magic and they cannot not kiss. Okay, can we just back up for a second? They're just following Christmas rules. Christmas rules state that if you have mistletoe over you, you have cast to kiss. It's not an engagement. It does. I wouldn't want to be under mistletoe if I am. She's running to a skit. She's not making a mistletoe choice. No, she has no idea. Yes. She has no idea. He knows he's under mistletoe. And then it's a great kiss. Why not go back for a little more because now we are under mistletoe. Well, he should have said, well, you know, we are. If I'm him and I find out this woman, this incredible woman that I had this incredible kiss with is engaged and was using me for like extracurricular elevator kisses just so she can get off, I'm like hard pass. Really? I don't want to be molested by an engaged woman. Would you have stabbed this woman? If this was you. Would I have stabbed her? If somebody came in? So that is the only, you're saying the only way to say no. The only way to effectively say no is to stab her? Well, you do carry weapons. You don't even let me touch you at all ever. Thank God. Ever. And I've never stabbed you. And I've never stabbed you. My point is, what would you do, honestly, if you're standing in a very, someone rushed in and just started kissing you? Oh, first of all, they would never get. They would, I would, if anybody started to come super, even if someone came close to me. You would stab them. By the way, this is even close. This is even very close for you. This is too close for me. Yeah, that's a thing. I would rather not be in this room with all of you. But no, if someone were to come rushing in and start trying to kiss me, I would be like, whoa, whoa, whoa, what's going on here? Right, right. You would have some sort of reaction to it. For sure. And it would be initially quite negative. What if they were super hot though? That's what I'm saying. I tell you shy. That's what I'm saying. I tell you shy. And you currently tell you shy? Yeah. OK. I'm going to say, because let's go back to the first one, if it's like Adorys Roberts. Oh, oh, oh. Yeah, I see. Yeah, if you, I look. I want to give you, I've got questions about being inside the Coppola family, about the Rocky movies, the Godfather movies. I would probably take the tell you shy or kiss. That's something like, I think an old person just to get to the information I'm looking for. If I'm being honest, you know. All I'm saying is life is for the living. OK, no, interesting. OK. No, interesting. It's like we can't, you know, these things happen. We are, I know there's all of these like rules you subscribe to, and that's great. But you can't deny life and chemistry. And sometimes shit happens. And you have to. But you didn't even know. Doesn't make someone a bad person. So by your logic, we should just be randomly kissing people in the street, because there is no like connection with them. If they're your soulmate, which is exactly what happened here. Yeah. But what you're saying is cheating is OK. If the person is with your soulmate. If the abrieved party is a bad person. The Carlton in this case. Yeah, I'm sorry. I just think so. If we liked Carlton, if he was a good match for her, but maybe not forever. I would never support that kiss. Then the kiss in the elevator becomes bad. But because Carlton is bad. So in this case, she can never be bad unless he is. But by the way, you don't know this about June, but June is the person who told Schwarzenegger that famous story. Eating is not cheating. OK. Yeah. So that's that. So that's where she's coming at it from. Totally. That's a cheating. Yeah, it does sound like a St. Clair line. Yeah. It's disgusting. Don't know what it's like in your house, but keeping everyone entertained can be a nightmare. Take the pressure off with E.E.'s award winning TV and full fiber broadband with Netflix now, TNT, Sport and more. And get their most powerful Wi-Fi seven as standard. So everyone can stream their films, series and sport at the same time. Switch to E.E.TV and broadband today. New BT Group customers only 62% UK availability terms apply. Can we talk about what I want to go back, whether you think she's a bad person or not, like, listen, things again, I'll just say. We have one round. OK, so I do want to talk about Mrs. Joyner, though, because and her business. Yes, I do have. I do have thoughts on what that is. Because here's what we know about her for the first interaction with Kay, where she comes on way too strong, watched from her. But then we learn that when he comes by, when Dustin comes by to get that nutcracker, she won't stay open for him. She won't stay open another couple of minutes, which makes me wonder how much business well, and her story wings getting her store appears to be one of those like indoor flea market stores, right, where it's like a series of little cubby holes where different people are selling stuff. Well, there's one of those like Sigmund Freud action figures. I saw in the show. And then when she before she realizes that Kay has left, she's staring down at the nutcracker and says something along the lines of like, yeah, I should get more of those or clocks. Yeah, yeah, little figurines around them. And then it is absolutely a woman. And then there's that. They're satisfying. BTK. That is the moment where she starts chasing Kay. And why? Why? For no reason. And she'll kill her. Kayla only randomly is following Dustin. She doesn't know he's there. He does. She doesn't know he has the nutcracker. She's just trying to stay away from Mrs. Joy and then and then Dustin does say, oh, running away from Mrs. Joy as if this is what we know in the town to be true. Well, she's probably trying to kiss everybody as well. Yeah. Maybe she was. Do we think she was chasing Kayla at a French kisser? Well, now that's a whole other story. I mean, but if she was so hot for business, if she was so into making the sale, then wouldn't she have stayed open for Dustin? That's why I didn't understand. Again, to give any stars hollow vibes, though, like the kooky. I feel like they wanted the kooky weirders of small town holiday nonsense. And this movie does do a lot of those scenes that you don't need, where like Dustin's outside of her store and she's like, oh, you're here early. Why don't you come inside? They don't just start to seem like a scene later. A lot of walk ups, a lot of walk ups, a lot of walking down long hallways. You don't need. They just don't. They don't have to stop. There's also like, is Dustin's house his office or his home? Well, he's definitely not a kitchen. There's no locking doors. There's no kitchen. It is he's knocking. He's like, come in. It's a business, but it's not. Can I also show you the most upsetting thing about it? Please. Image five here. This is what his house is. And I'll just point out that, you know, an elevator plays a very large part of this movie, and this shows us that he is on the ground floor. No, he is on the ground. But also let's take a look at this. I mean, the weird bunny ear thing that's in the center of the screen here. That's weird. It looks like he's in a cring barrel. Like it rented this loft that was staged. And they just said, sight on scene. It's everything. We'll take it. It's everything in the room. Leave it. Leave everything. Leave everything because he is cooking. And he is cooking in this kitchen. He just never goes to an industrial kitchen. And what's weird is he against the law. I wonder where his chef's whites when he's here cooking at home. And then he and then he wears them out in the world. I've never seen a chef walking about. I don't think they're supposed to because they have to be clean. And they're getting dirty from the outside world. But he also is having only a five minute meetup with his friend. Like there's so many meetups in this movie where they just go, hey, hey, great to see you. All right, I'm going to leave now. They have no time passes. And we don't learn anything. No. Well, it's so hard because what I couldn't get. I couldn't get my mind around is how Janna, if Janna's best friends with Kayla and they work together at a magazine called a magazine called a friend. Yeah, or a website. Maybe. But then also it seems like Janna, who's a solid ten. And I thought she was beautiful, but ten years older than Kayla. But it seems that they maybe went to high school together because she references her being a valedictorian. OK, if this is a part of her selling points, of course, if if a valedictorian came up and started kissing you, would that change? I'm going to change the opinion on this. I think here's the thing. I would love it. Valedictorian. I would love it. That's the first in class. Not valedictorian. I would love a beautiful valedictorian to start kissing me in an elevator. The minute she says, by by the way, B.T. Dubbs, B.T.K., I am engaged. And that was your thanks. OK, just was asking. I was just doing that to distract from Mrs. Joyner peace. I'm engaged. I would be like, fuck you. I'm out here giving a plus kisses away to engaged ladies. OK, here's. But back to me question, Janna, when I think went to high school with K, although I don't know how the numbers work there. And then Janna was very bad student. And then and then Dustin also grew up in this town with his cousin. They don't know each other. How do they not know each other? That's interesting. None of them know each other. And and the and Kayla could not be more famous. And knows Dustin. Yes. Yes, because he's the cater and they know each other from town and all that. And Mrs. Joyner knows everybody. Yeah, Joyner is like the whole town. Pursuit of everybody. But it felt like the show one or the movie wanted us to be like, oh, my God, she's Kayla and nobody seems to really know her, except Janna and Mrs. Joyner. By the way, they should have made the same. They should have made Kayla the star. Yeah. And he should have been like the director and she's the star. So because to be the to be the fiance of a famous person is an odd choice. It's yeah. It's a movie answer where Kayla's family is. No, this is her hometown. Well, they all were at this. They were all at their dad. No, they were all at the the party, though. Their engagement. Engagement. That was packed. Been and it wouldn't have been his family at the engagement. No, because well, he did invite a lot of press, he said, you know, all that Palo Alto press, all that Palo Alto press to cover. The entertainment. I mean, the PAP, the PAP. There's swimming. That's the, you know, that's the. Did anybody feel this was this was and I now know it was a K. Jewelers ad. But if you told me, my gosh, I'm just realizing something that Kay's jeweler must have also paid for the bracelet. Yes, oh, sure. Bracelet, that's the colors of the bracelet. I've never seen my life. What was missing the color green, by the way? I couldn't. It wasn't the colors of Christmas. It wasn't. It was what was it? It was red and pink. Also, he said also, he said, it's not where you think I wouldn't be so presumptuous. Are they already engaged? Oh, yeah. Well, I guess because they broke it off, but then he's coming back. That's the the mea culpa. It was matching. Is that a matching earring? It's the grossest thing I've ever seen. That's a bracelet. That bracelet makes me want to barf. This looks like a steal from like a jewelry commercial. Right. When it's like he went to the mall and we got it. But it also is a terrible presentation of it. A terrible box. I would think every kiss begins with a. By the way, I have a story. I auditioned for a K. Jewelry commercial. I feel like you and I at this point were staying in a friend's trundle bed. Anyway, hold on. What was that part of the face? It and I for a couple of months slept. I had a I did you sleep in the trundle or did I slept on the floor? OK, it was trundle situation. Anyway, I went to a commercial audition for K's jewelry. Wow. And they made us kiss or the hurt the guy did kiss me. And it was so shocking. The audition was now you're in that situation. Every kiss begins with. I was like, oh, my God. Now, wouldn't it wouldn't happen these days? No, but when I tell you that they were cool with it. Right. The director was like, oh, so you're saying this guy just rolled with it. And was like, I'm going in. I think so. But it was encouraged. And I didn't. Wow. Oh, you didn't like it. That someone just shockingly started kissing you in a scenario that you didn't think was going to be. It is. Was the audition ever kissed? Does anyone ever has anyone ever done that? Don't I just want to know like maybe was the audition you got mad at me last time? I don't. I actually don't like being pointed at. And I don't know. I don't like it from across the room. And I don't like it there. Should not be this close to each other. It's too close. I just keep. I just get dadada. Here's my question. That presentation was so horrible. And I would imagine if K is putting you think K put in 100 grand, but 50 grand to the last minute. I don't know. I don't know. Roughly the budgets of these movies run around this week. A million dollars. One to two million dollars. That's the average. So you're OK. And you know, you put in 100 grand, maybe maybe two undergrounds. Why don't you have a representative on set? That's not a case. They are for the commercial. Well, not a case. Because that box. But it should have been right. Branded box as opposed to that. Right. They wouldn't probably case Julia wouldn't want to give. That's the one at the end. That's where it's that's every kiss begins with K. Yes. If you're going to do the kids, so is every kiss begins with. You know, like that's right. Right. Yeah. That's a trigger for me. What does it say on the bottom? What does it say in front of the ring? The the Leo diamond. It's right. OK. Leo. I mean, the chat will tell us. Molly, what's going on with the chat? Anything checking with Molly? Molly Cam, what do we got on the Molly? Yeah. Buddy, I'm sorry to back up a little bit, but a lot of people are pointing out that the beautiful bracelet that's the color of Christmas is actually the color of the lesbian flag. All right. Oh, I'm OK to know. Is Carlton a lesbian? Honestly, if Carlton's a lesbian, that makes all the sense in the world. I would love that. Is his name Carlton? Yes. Great. I'd love to see Carlton at the end of the movie. Get into a Subaru with another woman. Oh, you know what? Everything would kind of come. Well, Carlton is having. He seems to be having an affair now. Once she starts her affair, he starts to have an affair with a sugarcane. I didn't like that woman because I felt like she was moving in. She was. Our girls already cheated on him, but she seemed a little like whatever. They were broken up. Dark-haired girls. Don't trust them. Wait. Hot take. Oh, my God. Hot take. Hot takes are incredible. They're hot. So you're cool. Dark-haired girls. You're getting unwarranted kisses. Yeah, they're trustworthy. No. That's why I had to dye my hair blonde. No, listen. Dark-haired. She's the one in Ursula. I don't know if there's any footage of that woman during the dance numbers. But she is. I'm just pretty terrible. No, but some of them were at least actual dancers. I'm not saying they were good, but they were dancers. And then there was our brunette. Right. The dark-haired villain who was truly like the most hilarious part. She wasn't, she was looking around sort of doing a lot of this, doing a lot of just like little jumps, little like this, this, little jumps, little jumps, looking, looking. Then her role in this is to complain about all the dancers. Yeah, right. Yeah, she had an eagle eye on her. She is not a dancer because she had an acting role. Well, I mean, when you see the sets and the props all in there, then it really, then she really pops. Yeah, the pale down version. She should be the star. The biggest dancer. There is a little hole though, right? I mean, I mean. Careful. Careful. Now you care for dark-haired girls. And sus. I agree with Paul. She was grossly old. Yeah. First of all. And I thought, I felt uncomfortable about it because like between her and Doris Roberts, I was like, every woman in this is elderly. Wow. Okay. So I never seen a nutcracker and I just assumed that the sugar plump fairy is a little girl who dances. Ew, no. Who is that girl? That's, I don't remember her name. That's Clara. But Clara, yeah. Why isn't she at rehearsal? She's like the queen of, you know, the other world. Angelica Houston, like that kind of a thing. What? She's not. I'd imagine. That's a dangerous brunette right there. I've never seen the nutcracker, Paul. I guess you were busy with those birds. First of all, this is making me like Carlton a lot more. Because he was just trying to cast the roles the way he saw them. He's not interested in it. This is a very parodown version of the nutcracker. This is like when I saw like Patty Lipone do Swinny Todd and there's only two people. I just want to make sure just to not to swing you back out of Carlton's favor, but he does say at a certain point, I'm the draw. Yeah. It's not about the dance. It's not about the dancers. It's about him. This is an ego's battle. But also Carlton's abusive to the dancers. He throws his script off the, you know, and in this day and age, you know. Well, it's not this day and age, is it? It's 2017 in the movie. 2015. Oh, okay. Yeah. Different time. A different time. When the movie started and we were about 15 minutes in, I thought for sure that Dustin was a pastry chef. Same. The other friendship is the baker. The baker. He only bakes. We only see him baking. I thought. And then he's baking more stuff for, and I thought for a long time he was making food for dogs. Yeah. But it was to raise money for the dogs. Me too. I thought they were making dog cookies. Yeah. I really want to go over the number of events that we are working toward in this movie that are on the docket. None of which are important whatsoever. So there is the engagement party, which at a certain point there's no engagement. So that sort of turns into just like a party. A party with lots of parties. Which is doubling as Carlton's like a premier party. He's invited press. He's invited. So the show is open? I think it's about to. I think this is in service. So there's that. And also I do want to address the fact that at one point he says, we have to keep our engagement because it will help the opening of the show. Right? Couldn't draw that line. What's even crazier at a certain point is that she says, we're holding off on our wedding until after Christmas because he's so busy with the show. But that means they're going to only start planning their wedding right after the show. So they're like a year away from getting married. Time to make out with a lot of other guys and see if we even want to do that. See if you can beat this. So then there's also a fundraiser for the animal shelter. But at one point Paul, you said it's not for the shelters, it's for the people who work there. I mean, it's you know, it's for the dogs. And I was saying it's for the it's for the organization. It's for the organization. Ultimately, it's for the dogs though. I hope that money's not going to just overhead costs. Okay. It was a very nice. That fundraiser is for the dog shelter. However they want to break up. But to be fair, it's June. I agree. I would love to get a look at those books. I'd love to get a look at the books for this for this shelter because I don't trust these guys. He didn't seem to make that many cookies that would actually bring in a lot of dogs. And only Josh was working there. They're always barking. There's another event. There's some sort of community event that they are going to that she she has made flyers. Yeah. What are the posts called? The dog event to give out at some community event. Then correct me if I'm wrong chat. I believe there's also something that she calls a tree event. Which is sort of the Christmas market she goes to. I think that might be the community event. But it might also be part of the fundraiser for the dogs. There's also in a montage a carnival. Yes. They also go to a full carnival. I think that's the pier. And that's after she just said she had the best time of her life researching the maker of the nutcracker. Yes. We have that image Molly. I forgot that whole story. The nutcracker is. He's the 80 year old man who made the nutcracker. Well, like what nutcracker comes with like like I don't know that nutcrackers were so specific like to the maker. It's like it's like you're getting all good. It's as if this man invented the concept of a nutcracker. And I want to read a book about wouldn't that be great. But no this is just a store bought nutcracker that they're pointing off as some like great artisan. Oh they also did a thing in this scene where they're texting where each of them says aloud the text that is then shown word for word on screen. But sometimes it's different because he said seriously that's great. And then when she got it just said seriously no dot dot dot that's great. Oh funny. But now this is what she says. She says researching Vance has been two of the most fulfilling hours I've had in a long life. Her life is dog shit. She was a valedictorian of her class and she is now terrible. Wikipedia has been the most fulfilling time. And also he's so down on her. He's like you write that article yet tonight. Like he's so everybody wants for her to get laid. They want to get her laid. That's everybody's everybody in the town with the exception of Mrs. Joyner wants to make that sale. Everybody is like let's get her coupled up. I don't know what she's wasting time. She's a bad business manager. She's out making postcards. The cousin. She's engaged. I understand but no one like her. The cousin her body be banging. No one cares about her. Joshua does. They throw her to deep side part like and we never see them. You know what I mean. I believe in them. We want to pizza. I thought that was very sinister. He's like want to come to pizza. I'm like that's the last we're going to see of that cousin. Wait you think Joshua's a BTK style murderer. You think we never see Kim again because she's bound tortured and killed. I personally really liked the fact that Dustin was on her ass about doing her work. Here's the deal. I like that. I've never seen that in a movie. I've got so much on her plate right now. She's. What is she? She's nothing. She's nothing on her plate. I guess she's separated from me. She's paraphrasing a note card into an article for Tempo magazine or whatever. Here's a hot take. Here's a hot take you guys are not going to see coming. Oh boy. I. Single unthinkable. I've agreed to be Carlton's business manager. So honestly all of the duties that she's pissed about doing. Yes. That's her job. Yes. This is what I've been saying. You're saying do you think she's getting paid for that. If I don't see a direct deposit. If I don't see cash in my hands or in the bank. That's not a job. So you think she's working for free. I do. I do not think he's paying her. But then don't agree to it. If you agree. Yes I will do this for you and then you disappear for three days. If I'm not being paid to go to carnival. I have to be an indentured service. Is this mad. He's relying on her to get the show up on its feet. He's got to focus. They're fucking. Get in the devil's knees. Look at this. Look at this. Even though they've broken up he's got requests. Please pick up my favorite socks. Where are you. How come you're not answering your phone. I have a headache. I need some medicine. Guys can I ask you a very very very honest question. Do you have a favorite pair of socks. Yes. Really. You do. I wore these today. Yeah those are good socks. Christmas socks. I do. I have a couple now of the same pair. I treat my socks like shit. I don't think of my socks in any way. Never. I don't have any. I don't think of them as. No. Can I say something and this is very vulnerable right now. Okay. Okay. I actually have. I've been on a mission just this year to upgrade my sock situation. Love this. Because I know it's something I've never paid attention to in my whole life. And you'd like to turn your attention to it. I always like they were haphazard and then what I would do and this is actually very vulnerable is because I didn't care about them. I never got new ones. I totally understand that. And so this year is the first year where I'm like I deserve. I want. You had to go to a single for that. I did because it's been a very empowering thing for me to say and to feel that I deserve good socks. I love these wonderful bombas. Wait a minute. The bombas is a plan to go. Wait a minute. What is this? Is this a K-Jeweler situation? Why are you guys both saying bombas? Damn it. And you know what? Every time you buy a pair of socks they give some money to charity. It's not. Okay. Bombas does. Bombas does. Bombas does. Bombas does. I do like bombas. I have. Here's the thing. I similarly a bunch of years ago just bought all new socks that were good. Like good socks. But I don't have a faith. That's my favorite pair. I just am like rocks, foot, right. Go. Yeah. But I don't have shitty. I agree. I have good socks. I would expect you to have bought all of the same sock. I did. Put them all in a drawer. You don't have to pair them. Correct. Those motherfuckers are just big. Boom. You have a favorite. Socks, socks, socks, socks, socks. But he has favorite socks. But out of those socks he's not saying, but this is my favorite. No. Yeah. I think we're all the same. Like you don't have a favorite of these. Correct. Well, I think what you guys aren't maybe into is, and I will say Paul got me into this, I would see that he had, he liked to play full sock. Well that's Paul. I know. I used to, but then I was. But then I sort of got him away from that and said like, well you're not going to show our personalities through our socks. Yeah. She yelled at me about that. And then I stopped the playful sock. Oh, wow. This is a very special one. I put this out. I'll allow it. I'll allow it. But what's interesting is, I don't know if you've noticed this, but I've, now you're taking on a playful sock. I've started to get like that happy sock brand. I'm like, I like those. You just, what is going on? What is going on? What is going on? Where is this sock? Where is this sock? Is this live stream underwritten by socks? Are we not socking? You know, here's a cautionary tale. Matt Lauer, when I met him. Where? Remember we used to go on? Yes, I do. No, remember we used to go on? Yeah, of course I do. He never wears socks. Ew. A loafer without socks. That's disgusting. And that serial killer shit. You know what? My barber, my barber Rudy told me, he, I was wearing my, I was wearing, I was wearing my socks up and he was like, that's, that's good. He's like that, like that you wear, you pull your socks up and saw his marches. If you don't, you got to be eyes out for those men who are going socksless into a loafer. Well, now it was such a look for a while. Yeah. Right around this time, actually, like the late teens, the like slightly high, I think that's a great look. And a bare ankle. You like that look. With a no-show sock. I do like, John pointed me, I do like that, I do like that look, but that's with a no-show sock. Correct. Yeah. I think what we're, I think what we're realizing though is. We're all touching tonight. Oh, yeah. Why does it burn when you touch me? I think what we're realizing is socks are your happy. And there's a lot of happy in this movie. Can we play the montage of happy? No, no, no. Yeah. This is something that I thought they were trying to make a thing, but it wasn't. This is your happy. The montage of. Oh, that was really, that turned my stomach. I kept waiting for there to be a threesome with the cousins and her because. Cousins, there was something. Look at this. Look at these cookies. They look so happy. They were made with happy. Well, the real happy is coming up. So what's the happy? This could be the beginning of a soft core porn. Could it not? We're throwing dough at each other. Oh, I got to take this thing off. This is the happy I was talking about. This is seriously happy. Here's my movie pitch. My movie pitches wouldn't it have been so much better if Kayla and Kim. Kim, what's the cousins name? If they ended up together because she and he have so little chemistry. Oh, wow. That's it. That's the funny part. I was like, oh, they like Kim is more interesting to me. Yeah, that's great. Then I'm really, I know you felt this way too. Paws. I don't want you to just. I know because I know you felt this way too. I thought they had great chemistry. I love them together. Now if I was to disagree with you, I would have been lying the first few times that you made me agree that you made me. You were emotionally. You were like, I love they had a great relationship and they were really good. Why are you really good? Why are you playing in California? I love being out here. S.O.S. in horse code. And it's okay if anyone kisses anyone in elementary. Fine. Don't point. Don't point. Don't point. I am. But if June wants to chase someone down the street and kiss them in a magical elevator. As long as there's mistletoe, I'm okay with it. Guys, did anybody say at any point in this movie that the elevator was magic? No. Yes. Yes. Because you know, they say not that it's magic, but they tell stories about this elevator. This elevator has a story to it. I think it was meant to be a magic elevator. I think it's soft magic. I think it's soft magic. I actually have hard magic. That's what I tell the ladies. You're about to see the soft magic. Mary Christmas. Close your eyes. The hard magic, ladies. Mary Christmas, happy blow year. May you have some hard magic in your future. Now, hard magic. Isn't that what they call that stuff you put on ice cream? I will say this. I want to talk for a second about the elevator in general. And I think that maybe the best person here from is one of the stars of the film. Oh no. Brant Dardy. We were able to get him on the show. So this is Brant. Hey, jerks. What's up? Brant Dardy here. You probably recognize me better as the star of Mary Christmas. I wanted me to share some anecdotes, ask me what kissing Doris Roberts was like. Is it weird that there's mistletoe in an elevator? All amazing questions, none of which address the point. This movie was written by an insane person. I looked up her resume and it turns out she's written exclusively holiday films where the leads kiss in an elevator. And I'm like, what the fuck happened to you in an elevator? Anyway, the movie was directed by a man who couldn't give half a shit what happened. Oh wow, he's really free. I asked him, what are we doing here? And he looked up from his phone and went, I don't know. I looked right down there. Oh, fuck. Doris Roberts. She leans into me and she goes, Brant, I'm going to try something. And I was like, say less. You may have my body. And so unscripted, she pulls me and kisses me, slaps me the fucking tongue and then slaps me and walks away. Anyway, the movie makes no sense on a cellular level from moment to moment. The fact that you've watched it and can highlight that I am supposed to be in an elevator at the level on the first floor. I can't tell you how much I fucking love and respect you guys because this is exactly the kind of critical minds we need watching this film. We need people who can understand the madness. And I feel like you see it. Anyway, I love you guys. It's like the longest cameo of my life because you hit on a very niche subject for me. So, Jerks, possibly including Paul, I love you guys. You have an amazing, amazing Christmas. Please look up the writer of this movie and let me know how she branched out at all from people making out in elevators because I hope not. Well, Brant, thank you, Brant. And so now I'm going to say- You've only gotten better looking. Well, now- What did I say? I've only gotten better looking. He's a star. We broke Oscar Isaacs on this podcast and I feel a star. I'm going to devote the rest of my career to making that guy a star. Okay, well- And casting him opposite June and I- So now do you understand why she kissed him? Because he used to be lived in which we just make out with him for like four or five hours. Let me just say that Brant was also in 50 Shades Free as Sawyer. He was the bodyguard that Christian hires for Dakota Johnson. Okay. I do want to bring up one thing that Brant said, which was that Doris Roberts improvised the kiss. No, I think she improvised in one take, the tongue and the slap. Okay, God. Like the Cajuners guy. Similarly. Yeah. Okay, God. Because I was going to say that's a major. I thought that at first. Okay. But Doris Roberts for sure needed to just update her SAG insurance. I have been in some interesting movies with older, more well-established actors who clearly don't need the money, who just say, you know what, let me just do my hours. Right. Come in, come out and then we're done. Okay, God. All right. She's clocking hours. 100%. Wow. Wow. What if I told you though she was getting paid in gift certificates to gay jewelers? Oh my God. Oh my God. This was, these two things both rocked me. I know. I just want to show you. I had a note that just says I like him. It makes me want to talk all the other elevator writer movies. Well, by the way, I will say this, that Brant also wrote the first parody Christmas movie for the Hallmark Channel. Oh, cool. Yeah, in 2019 called the Christmas Christmas movie. Because I also, I feel like we haven't spent enough time on Kayla. I really liked Kayla. Yeah, yeah, we have nowhere to go. The only complaints I had about her is she didn't turn off her phone notifications. Oh, well, this is an issue. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do have this issue. I think that if you don't know to turn your notifications off when you're with a group of people, you are meant, I don't care. These are work emails that she should be handling. I don't care. You can still get those notifications and have your phone on silent. But this is 2015 when people didn't have that option. They didn't have that option there. I found that to be insane to go on a romantic date with pretend a prospect, a post engagement prospect. You called dates prospects? A post engagement prospect. Yeah, she's a prospector. Look at her goals. Leave your notifications on. Well, also, Brant is so sweet. He's always like, you should take that. And that's why I love that we're just calling him Brant now. Yeah, that's what I love Brant. When she describes to him that her relationship is over and she says, I'll describe it in Twitter size 140 characters or less. And I was like, what? What? What? What is this? Seriously, why does she go back to Carlton? For no people. Why? People make decisions in this movie for no reason other than plot. This is why he says, and this is why I think probably her parents are dead at a very young age or something and she's looking for love. And but he says, he says that you're more important to me than work. And that's what she's been waiting to hear is that she's important. Right. Because she's like kind of threatening him. Like I'll break up with you. And then he was, then he said, but I love you. And then she was like, now you're confusing me. Yeah. But the final thing that makes her come back is she said, he says you're more, he said, you should get back to the ballet. And he says, you're more important to me than work. That's how bad her self-worth is. Well, because if I were her, I would look at Brant and say, okay, he also really cares about his work. He wants to open up a restaurant. Yeah. I don't think he's going to be open up a restaurant anytime soon. Really jumping in from like baking. We saw him, we saw him make zero food beyond cookies that looked not good. He bought a nutcracker. He did look like what I would make. Most of his cooking was buying a nutcracker. Okay. And when they're doing, when they're at the day and they're going to do the, he's wearing the suit and this is where he realizes that they are all financed. He is standing in front of a table that you would think would have examples of all the food he's going to serve, but it's a roll of bubble wrap, a big brown, just box full of stuff. Like it looks like just random supplies from the shoe. You guys don't understand, like, haven't you seen Top Chef? They spend a lot of time just like writing notes. Yeah. Kind of ideating, thinking about things. I thought it would be a different dog. Like they have to kind of get out in the world before they want to create something. They have to, but here's the thing. If I'm her and I am nervous that, that this guy, my fiance won't commit. He's not going to nail down a date. He's obsessed with his work. And then I see Brandt and we have that amazing kiss and he's also, he's a guy who wants something out of life. He's a go-getter. He wants to, he's an entrepreneur. Great. Loves dogs. And then I see that he's willing to adopt a dog. Oh yeah. Marry that man. That man. Man. But she still goes back to Carlton. That's what I said. Self isn't good. That's why. Why though? We don't ever understand why she's making such terrible decisions because I want to, Janna seems to want to shake her and say like, cut it out. But Janna needs to get a life. Janna needs to get a fucking life. When Janna. Well yeah, because what, Kayla is like, how come you're not dating him? Exactly. Why is it Janna? I think Janna is honestly as a single white female thing to Kayla because why is she so obsessed with Kayla's life? Well she wants to get out there. I just want to bring up one thing because as I'm hearing all this conversation, we're watching Kayla do the same mistake twice. She's with a man who's obsessed with his work. And then this guy also obsessed with his work. He wants to open up a restaurant. That's no easy task. No. Well that's why he says to her. When she makes those, I'm going to be honest, terrible postcards for him. Yeah, they are bad. He says, hey, don't do this. Making postcards isn't her dream. She's not a graphic designer. Designing a website is apparently your job. Neither is getting other guy's favorite socks. Yeah. So she's just doing the exact same nonsense. Googling. So he's like, hey, don't do this for me. Do something for you. Do something for you. And that's when she is like, and her, the second wish of the movie is I wish I knew how to set boundaries. And I'm like. Oh. Hey. Is that what this whole movie has been about? What the fuck is this movie not? I just understood the movie. All right, what this is a movie about a woman with writer's block. Oh, okay She is doing everything she can. Oh, she's being a businessman Business manager slash in you don't know about the unpaid. She's not paying. No, there's no way she's Doing ever even when she's in the right relationship because he's forcing her to write she gets out of it Yeah See that little cursor blinking I get that and I do understand that End of this movie she should have written the thing I think I think she's about to she did she is about a year later Too late Kayla. It's a year later. He has moved to LA. He is not open to restaurant. They're on a Ferris wheel Yeah, they're in the Santa Monica That was meant to be Pier I couldn't I had to I looked it up There is coastline in Palo Alto because I was like because in the middle of that montage what's weird They're on our bridge. Oh, yes, they are multiple times at the carnival doing stuff that is pier based But they start they start their date montage and they're where he's wearing the buffalo sweater Yes, bison sweater the big shaggy white looks great and that's great sweater. He ends the montage In that sweater. That's correct in the midst of the montage. They each are wearing 10 other outfits Yes, that's what I mean like they covered a lot of ground Suggests the days have passed. Yes, but they end exactly where they started same in the same outfit Yes, I think in a weird way they probably shot, you know, yeah So they were like we don't have time for this change Nobody if if brandt is telling us that the director went No, and back to its fun. Nobody's tracking outfits I feel like brandt probably and the the lovely actors who played Kayla They were had to direct themselves by the way here go one year later same outfit Here's what I want to say and this is important for me There is Entirely too much face grabbing during all kissing in this movie Every kiss is full of it must be direction because Carlton does it was Everybody is doing so much face Like big face grabbing Chin grabbing if someone ever touches my chin like I'm gonna break their fucking If I ever went to grab a girl by the chin like this like you little kid I would expect to be stabbed even if I would understand it. Yeah, you would go Slowly put it While making full eye contact. Yes, exactly just a tiny stiletto blade that you've got It's real there's so much big grabbing of faces that I was like don't don't get girl grabby with the head But I feel like you need I think that that's a movie thing like you need to like be pulling someone because it is It's if you don't grab when you're doing an on-screen kiss I think it feels like it's just too much space to yeah I'd love to know how many real life face grabs are going on. You know, I think very few so so few you think So I don't I can't you need to because you know what's happening You don't need a guideline to be like, okay, okay face. Yeah, it's like a you know an airplane It's like I want to On your head so that I know where to put my so that my lips have a direction to move And I but I feel like when someone's got you by here is so Roberts's head grabbing he's head grabbing Carlton's head grabbing its head grab city well, I mean you have to because you're not sure like a lot of these kisses are Stolen Valor kisses. I mean they are not there's no You're trying to keep people together so few people in this movie are receiving kisses that they wanted There's a lot of kissing in this movie But many of the kisses are unprompted and surprising to one of the two I think that's part of her kink Honestly, Kayla's no the Doris Roberts The writer Our boy Dustin in one day is Two days back to back days first he gets on an elevator in Doris Roberts molests him second day Kayla molests him That I would take and he says why didn't I take the stairs? Yeah, well, again, he lives on the And why did I take the elevator yeah, I will say that why didn't I just jump on my window some of the face touching I think is is maybe tied to the thematic song. I'll read you some lyrics here It says chasing clouds as they go by trying to find the reason why you elevate my love I can't wait to get across the Frisco Bay by your touch Captivated you're too much. What is this? Which I believe someone's family member must have it was it was it was the the person who come the Scored the film. Yeah, okay. Yeah, but yeah, it was Yeah, it's elevate my love by Brandon Jarrett the composer of the film Yeah, when I love when they do their montage of falling in love, right? Mm-hmm. Do you think they fuck? No, they're never fucking they you don't think they fucked no, she's not she's a good girl I know for well first of all where she's sleeping on the street. Well, she's sleeping on that slope on that hotel room Yes, that was weird that was weird It also felt like cuz it's the that cut is weird because she starts typing Yes, and then it's her waking up and he's typing on the same computer stealing her idea I thought I was like wait a minute. Has she never she's she never been typing like This his door is he is this his story. It's like a John Candy Dairies movie Where is I thought for sure he was stealing the idea and he was going to run off with this Cracker and it was going to be his next big hit. Oh That's a great idea for a sequel by the way, I will say this I think the reason why she had to stay in the hotel room is because it was full of cosplayers because there's a convention in town If you look at scene one Scene one when they first check into the hotel. That's just image one. That's true throughout the movie is they own nothing They have not gotten clearance for any they are shooting in the real world. Yeah in a movie with no extras Yeah, cos players are out interesting feels like oftentimes they are just existing in the world like the There they have not like I believe the the Chachki store is I don't think they know set decorated that at all I think they found a door Put it yes, and wrote it in I also think possibly the guy who plays the guy who plays the doorman has so much holy cow The bellhop and he has also no magic No, no magic Someone's dad. He's dressed like a 1930s bellhop for no reason and he's working the side door Yes, not working a front door only guy Night time day at night. They also these lingering close-ups of him I guess they say that we're not getting married till January they cut to him and he's like, huh hair hair pouring out of his His weird hat like what's happening with him? Couldn't make heads or tails out of that guy. I thought maybe it would be the Santa Claus I wouldn't be fun kept going back to that Santa when she says Because this is we talked about it a little bit, but the movie keeps giving us setups right magic But then the wishes the wishes he does three wishes with that Santa none of which when she says I want that girl To have all of her dreams come true. I was like, okay, we're gonna see that Right doesn't happen when she does it though cuz there was a moment where I thought that that girl on the bench Was the dark haired girl that sugar plum fare? Oh She got like popped into the so that if that's the case then then yes, I hope that's then it's not I wanted to be Okay, well and I will say that the last Santa time he's like well you'll figure it out F you Santa Come in and interrupt me looking over a bridge and then you have no advice but to say you'll figure Wait, how about the fact that she has twice wished with Santa and then this third time She wishes in a fountain with Santa there next to I thought I said to Paul It's too much too many wishing many wishes. I said to Paul. Oh my gosh. She threw the bracelet away. Oh That had been great. I thought she had but I know I feel like there's a checklist for like all these like movies and This writer just took all of them instead of just like yeah, like you take four And then right around the four but she's like I'll do the wishes. I'll do the stand. I'll do the dogs I'll do the cooking but all of them only halfway. Yeah, yeah all of them only halfway None of the none of these component pieces are enough like the wishes needed to actually come true I agree the cooking needed to be seen and tasted and eaten and all of me realize that all of the homework movies We've seen with Melissa Joan Hart. Yeah, she's got a really well done She's the best Molly I want to go to the crowd I want to see what people are saying in the chat any comments that are happening anything that we could add to I forgot that this We've been going so long understood anything. Are they correcting us? Absolutely. Well, and I wanted to point out and people are obsessed with this bellhop Would it surprise you to learn that he is the line producer of this movie? Yeah, his name is not an actor The other thing that we've been learning in the chat about the writer of this film who writes a lot of elevator Christmas movies She also Created a romance streaming service Called passion flicks with Elon Musk's sister Apparently we need to go down the rabbit hole of passion flicks because I think this is some gold Wow Passion flicks. Wow. I don't need to be supporting the musks. No, I mean, you know, you know sister Politics Anything else we missed before we get into second opinion Everybody's talking about how beautiful Molly is Sorry, I was I supposed to pay attention to other comments All right, well look, this has been great and you know, obviously we have an opinion about this movie There are people out there that have a different opinion. So I checked in with the wolves of Glendale hilarious band They're recording an album right now and they put together a song for us Oh Love the wolves of Glendale they'll be at sketch fest in San Francisco Later in the month at the Great American Music Hall. They also have been doing this like iron Chef music show where they just released they get like a signed a topic and they have to write a song about it Oh, that's cool. They did one for the Clippers. They did one for Shrek. It's been All right, so Merry Christmas, there's only one review on Amazon Oh one review on Amazon and it's a five-star one That's it. So we had to go to Letterbox as well So I'm gonna go back and forth between Letterbox and Amazon and we'll start off with Splashpoint says what a surprise to see three of hallmarks star Studs in this film though not the channel's hard hitters These always bring a smile to my face first the very cute Ben Levine He always brightens the screen his star shines mid-movie as the story Then there's the handsome David O'Donnell who commands a wonderful presence in his scenes when sporting a beer That's yeah, okay, yeah when sporting a beard I often do not recognize him at first but looking more closely Give him away and then there's the hey mom super quick cue. Where's he from? He's from Wellesley, Massachusetts super cool And then there's a love interest brand already who offers the warmth that that Christmas rom-com needs He's like the whip cream a top a cup of hot cocoa But I still have questions is it Santa the bellhop or Mrs. Billings Who plays any magical role in the blooming relationship? 10 out of 10 stars so it ends with a question Her question about the magic did not hold her up. No. Yeah, not at all Intas Zome wrote a technically a bad movie by all measures, but it grows on you with three watches Don't just immediately turn it off when it comes on TV. Give it some time give it a shot Certain audio parts even the fiance's dramatic accent or the store ladies over the top antics grew on me It went from a six Technically to a nine-star because they are there are some grading parts, but I really like certain scenes. So I Don't want it to be lost in all my nine stars to avoid spoilers I'll just say the bulk of the scenes worth watching and letting growing you are at the beginning and at the end now with all That being said this really doesn't deserve a ten star Nevertheless, it's worthy of a rewatch or two when you catch it on TV or in the mood for Phrases and moments that get caught in your head and resurface from time When you're in the mood for phrases and moments that get caught in your there was a phrase the cousin who just loved Kim She did say when she was really upset that brand did not go after Kayla. She kept on saying she's miffed at him Really miss right now, and I don't get miss all the time, but I am missed right now And I was like wow, I haven't heard missed and ever well They don't use the chocolate of words. Yes, they Now been normalized you can say pissed on TV. Yes, you can't say it on Homer right? I will say this Jason. I'm pulling this one out for you because this is I Think it's sir 44 the subject line is loving an elevator, okay, and it's just Well, we're going down it says Christmas is filled with magic and in this movie The magic comes in the shape of an elevator rumor has it that when people meet in the lift they will fall in love Soppy soppy gush gush well it's Christmas Jason Did I write this in an active blackout? Soppy was it was this written last night Kinks like if that's a real Just saying I think that is a thing. Oh, it's gotta be Demonstrated for sure, but I mean like it is very now we know The people that are that love this kink are putting it into our Christmas movies Yeah, are we comfortable with this sexy elevator play? Yeah, right. I would love it to be consensual is all I'm saying I would love for elevator play to be consensual That's all I'm asking maybe that's a part of what the play is well, I guess now Because I think a lot of it is too like the Jocelyn puts you on each other Okay, you know and the lights going out Because we don't have it in this movie in this movie he gets stuck in the elevator alone And he has an intercom system though You just talk to it he was talking to the mistletoe You stopped me from meeting the girl Yes Everybody knew that if everybody knew that is this real or is this the elevator's magic Doris Roberts is like moving out. She's like, you know, I'll tell you this elevator is magic Everybody Every time he needs Doris Roberts out of the elevator she's rude to him and acts like she doesn't she doesn't even know Once you set foot in the elevator all inhibitions are gone In the outside world you have to come to grips with who you are as a human being and Find your way to the love that the elevator knows you already have and the name of that movie is the Elevator Get ready for some hard magic Would you recommend this movie Jason? I don't know. Here's the thing sort of I mean sort of yes absolutely for the thing But if you're gonna be watching a Lot of us are putting on holiday movies in this season. I'm gonna say absolutely put this in the mix It's longer than it should be so this is a great point and I made this note So do we we all talk so often about how you we clicked pause and how is there still 40 minutes left? How is this okay for the first time ever the first time I paused to say How long is this movie? How much more do I have? I was sub 10 minutes I was Minutes into the movie before I was like I I think this has been an internable amount of time Am I almost done and I was like oh I've watched none of it so far Wow that's Shilled me to the bone. I thought the movie was over and I saw 45 minutes left She breaks up with Carlton and gets out of the saddest relationship. She's in very early on very early on like 20 minutes in That's why it's so good the pace of it is so confusing And I would also say in these hallmark movies that are so successful There's an hour and a half buildup to just a kiss Five minutes eight minute mark of the movie There's not a lot to live up to I know do you know what I'm saying? Well, I don't know what I'm rooting for you know, I mean like they seem to be obviously well matched So just be together there isn't anything Incredibly difficult. There's no hurdles really there is no only they put their hurdles up in front of each other They all they need to do is choose each other and that's if you remember some of the very powerful Moments of dialogue in the movie when she says to him did I cross a boundary? Yeah, he goes no you didn't make one Those are the hurdles like and think about it in this movie Those are the hurdles very real life in the past the hurdles have been like this Nutcracker that has been brought to life This was a dog that has become a man and now he's like You have intentions to be a writer and do all of this your counter intentions are stronger Yeah, and are overpowering what you really want and we never heard how the Performance we never saw any of that nothing because I don't think it ends the night before She says I'm flying out the night before because I'm not gonna see the show It's too painful and then she says to the uber driver give me ten minutes and then she goes into the elevator So that's the night before we're led to believe show went on I think so. Oh, I think Carlton Nothing His name is above the title. It's gonna be the draw. Yeah, he is the draw. He's a choreographer director actor He's one of the best We always make shirts here at the show and I think that you know bitch. That's not Christmas is definitely 100% that's the way to go, but I do want to just pull out that we did remake the very first shirts We ever made Ridiculous cage Which the original people at ear will thought we were gonna get sued by Nicholas Cage and they told us we had a seasoned assist Which I don't think was real Stocking stuff for this was also very much during his very litigious period So I think we did the right thing now. This is one that we also got in trouble for this is a legitimate in trouble Because it's a BB8 and it says what is its mission? That's a June shirt, but there was wrong punctuation in it and People got angry because there was an oh Because there's no Cool that's what I thought too and I was like it's not cool It's like a little collector's and then someone said I will not wear a shirt with bag grammar on it I would love I would love it if we had a button to unsubscribe people You can't listen anymore we great news you thank you so much you are unsubscribed So our Christmas gift to you is that you can go get these original shirts have never been available since They were taken down and threatened legal action you can get them now at our T-Public store But let's go through what we with some plugs. My book is always a great Christmas Into a stock I'll personalize it which I have to remind myself to go sign those books tomorrow I'll do that and I feel it does feel like even just in recent episodes. Yeah, you've told so many new stories Yeah And of course dark web every Monday in on YouTube you can watch it for free if you're catching up Rob and I our studio burnt down We're in the woods now. We're in a hotel Surrounded by strangers and we have weird guests popping in Jerry O'Connell came by John Gabriel's coming by and then this Monday Yes, sir Lester's is in bed with us Who else is our let's see if we'll see by the image who's gonna put promote next Oh Okay, so that date already passed but you can actually purchase a ticket at the deep dive Academy comm and Rewatch this show that already happened tomorrow at 5 p.m. Yes So similar to how people can watch this show tomorrow Yes, but we're gonna be in the chat In the chat so we will be watching along with our audience tomorrow at 5 p.m Pacific standard and if you can't make that you can watch it whenever you want But it'll be really fun in the chat you guys are in the chat you get it Yes, now Jason will go to we'll go to you man on the inside season to the fantastic Mike sure show. I mean season two Yes, I'm in season two the show is absolutely hilarious and and absolutely heartbreaking In turns and it's wonderful Percy Jackson and the Olympians season two people are loving it people They have an amazing billboard did you see the wave so they built a billboard that is actually splashing waves on Great it looks gorgeous and then all out Simon riches play that I'll be doing on Broadway At the Niederlander theater in the new year get your tickets. I'm sure you can figure you're hanging out next to Ben Schwartz and Greg Robinson there Heidi Gardner Sarah Silverman are in my cast Craig Robinson. It's gonna be a blast And I'll just throw out Taskmaster season 19 just because they're still up there Why not and the art of small talk guys? This is the time for holiday parties and Learning how to small talk is so vital. We have an entire chapter Dedicated just to that just to the holiday just to the holiday how not to get stopped, you know always have a destination And the audiobook is fantastic pop that audiobook on during the holiday Thank you. I want to shout out our amazing team our producing team Molly and Scott the videos that they cut the Cameos that they reached out to we want to thank everybody a few but more importantly. We want to thank our in-house staff right here Wes as Zoe Helping us through our first ever in-person virtual streaming event And thank you for all submitting your questions being in the chat for buying a ticket watching this Thank you so much. We appreciate you so so much is the best and Merry Christmas Merry