FULL SHOW: Jeff’s Easter Egg Parody,15 Minutes of Lame Date + Best April Fools Pranks (4/3/26)

Hey, it's Brick and Jeffrey in the morning and man Jeff's song of the week today goes hard Get ready for that plus a brand new second date laser stories lots of fun Oh, and all the April Fool's pranks. We're gonna go over them all the companies did like the funniest ones So yeah, definitely be here for the full hour. It's about to start but before we do we got to feature you Yes, and we're featuring tack tracer who said a great segment you guys could do Oh, we have the whole crew do an escape room together Do one with most of the crew or part of the crew Yeah, we used to do really fun So we used to be able to take a whole trip where we would take a plane full of listeners to Vegas with us God it was the days when we still had marketing money before my time So hey, you know what we're gonna run that up to the bosses one more time Alright, let's get to your full hour starting right now Here's some good news to start your day Brooklyn Jeffrey in the morning according to a new uplifting study most Americans are just three months away from total financial collapse That's the financial cushion that most Americans say they have left before bills start going unpaid In between our four jobs we all have so cool And it's not just people facing potential job loss. It could be a medical emergency Absorbing one too many price hikes who knows but roughly six out of ten adults say they're gonna be out of options in 90 days Good news eight out of ten say they'd still door-dash themselves a large pizza with all the fixings And pay all the extra fees for it because we're not willing to get it ourselves. We have standards We still think we're better than you yeah, I mean yeah, your wife might say but honey Domino's is only a block away. Let's go pick it up Okay Like I was going along with a bit for a minute Because if you put in a delivery order of $50 or more then they'll toss in an 18 pack of Parmesan bread bites on the house That's saving money Was this sponsored Any sponsors remember Companies have any marketing money left It's great Good luck being more uplifting than that Jake your move What a troublesome energy Well yesterday at this time we learned some very important stats about Easter for example Americans spend a whopping $22 billion on this holiday every year which comes out to a hundred seventy seven dollars per person Yeah, take that emergencies Is that why people were mad about the price of eggs? Well the only thing more irresponsible than American Easter spending are the terrible answers you all gave to your questions yesterday That's why we're running it back again with more egg-based math for another no bunny business edition of 20 of 20 Just like the day before you say number one through 20 I'll give you an Easter stat that could be about foods Traditions or candy hawking rabbits. You just have to tell me is the real number higher or lower We'll start with the woman whose ideal egg hunt comes with mini bottles of liquor inside. Yeah, that's Alexis And money No way this is perfect Alexis what percentage of Americans think the Easter bunny should give out money like our friend Is it over or under 30% 100 million percent Overlocking it in quick 46% of people would prefer money in their eggs We could all use it Brooke seven is off the board. Let's go 12 three in four parents plan on having the talk with their children the birds and the bees about eating candy and moderation But is it over or under 70% of parents who admit to occasionally stealing from their kids candy 100% of parents Anyone today jade over over you're sure well, I mean if they aren't admitting to it, they're lying Brook thinks more than 70% The real number is 80% of parents admit to it. Yeah, so you know that the real number is higher 20% lie. All right, we're two for two Jose. We're back to you seven and 12 are off the board Let's go 14 in another poll Jose people were asked how they plan to celebrate Easter and the top answer was having a special meal with family Or friends 21% said that what percentage said going to church? Over or under 7% Seven you know what as a guy who was raised as a Catholic in the church and we went every Easter and every Christmas I'm gonna say more Does it count with virtual church attendance? Actually, my parents do attend Yeah, just watching a TV and evangelist is that work? Million viewers Dash some communion crackers They said over 7% 14% say they were going to church on Easter Number 14 all right, they've gone three for three and I'm in a precarious position Jeffrey This right I'm in big trouble Easter questions, but I'm gonna go with number two. Okay. I'm in good shape then all right in a poll on Holidays what percentage of Americans say Easter is their favorite holiday of the year? Is it over or under 15%? It's got to be the chocolate right I thought it was the magic show There's a magic show. I mean not a church and the stories kind of a magic show. Oh, yeah, it's like a disappearing My god, you should go on tour Favorites I mean I would assume that most people would prefer like Christmas and Halloween and Arbor day Yeah, as beloved as Easter is I can't see it being above 15% I'm gonna go lower That's a strong answer I support it. I'm scared Brooks says it's strong Thanks to the timing though we have to go to a tiebreaker And Alexis I'm gonna offer you a diner special opportunity again this time If you get this right Alexis not only will I take the shock, but I will make two eggs any style for each one of you here in the room Or if you get it wrong Alexis, I am completely safe from getting shocked Please don't do your except yes. All right. Here's your question So we know that 13% of Americans say their favorite thing about Easter is going to church But what about attending an Easter egg hunt? Oh, is it over or under the 13% of churchgoers as their top thing? It comes are everywhere. They're so fun and they're in every city park But are they fun for the adults in attendance? Are they only fun? Yeah, you watch all the kids just charge at each other And it's so fun to relive your childhood through your Children I do like hearing ear piercing children's screams for like 20 minutes That's a good point the wrong board. I'm going over Alexis says that over 13% of people say the best thing about Easter is attending an Easter egg hunt. Let's go eggs She is wrong It's 12% Just underneath I'm safe and I have what today's edition of Valentino 20 Since Alexis blew it on her last question she's gonna be getting shot while singing candy shop by 50 cents I wanted eggs this morning. I'll take you to the candy shop I can tell that that song came out when she was in elementary Now that's my favorite part of you Your shock all the question of the day We've heard about strange things selling at auctions Jeffrey in the morning. It's a mix of fun fact recently. We covered the unbelievable eBay sale of Cheetos ar'd Oh, yeah, Cheeto shaped like a Pokemon character sold for $87,000 I've been searching every Cheeto bag since well mark this as another weird one that just hit the auction block This one in the UK cuz a one and a half inch dreadlock of Bob Marley's hair It's up online according to the listing it's the first genuine example of Marley's hair to be sold in the last 20 years It was a fan who got it back in 1978 was performing on a BBC program and all she did was ask him for it Which isn't a weird question to go up and be like hey, can I have some of your hair? Apparently Bob just kept nodding and chuckling seemed just amused by the question till the fan just went for it Oh, what grab twisted and pulled off a piece of it That's Memory booklet along with Marley's autograph Presumably she grabbed his hand and scratched it across the book and it's been there ever since oh So the auction closes in three days already the dreadlock is up to three grand That's not that much for a piece of hair. That's a lot for a lock of hair I would think much cuz I put three grand down. I thought it was a big bit When the Cheeto goes for 87 That just makes me think we need to start immortalizing stuff from our show to make a profit Lock a few of those up in a plastic bag you put those online also Brooke What do you think about posting your windshield wiper glasses up for auction those fishbowl frames? I need them Yeah worst case scenario a kid buys it for three bucks and uses it to burn ants Let's get those things up for sale we got laser stories right after this It's the radio segment that's offering a lunch special where they'll surgically enhance your BLT sandwich into a BBLT Brazilian bacon lettuce tomato sandwich between two meaty hands It's all thanks to laser stories Segment where we read weird news stories around the globe just the kind of one else does except we've got a laser Other PB and jailbates just don't this first laser story is out of Florida A man named Farron Fullerton was arrested a couple weeks ago He was trespassing at a hotel cuz he wouldn't leave after his checkout time Sometimes you're waiting for the plane and you know yeah, okay take this out of the criminal right away When the cops showed up they found Farron wearing nothing other than a prison inmate uniform Well upon closer examination the uniform belonged to the local county jail Authorities looked into Farron's background and confirmed he was not an escapee from that facility But he had been there so apparently he somehow snuck away with it after a previous stay It's like when you go to the bowling alley and you're like oh my god, these are actually kind of cute shoes He liked the orange outfit totally broke regardless He was taken to jail and was not asked to change Has for what the police department thought the sheriff said I've heard of dress for success But never dress for arrest Yes, you want yeah, it was prepared. Let's go to your next laser story out of Alabama A woman named Carrie posted a TikTok about being on the hunt for a man named Mike Who her friend had fun with while out dancing? I love that and she's wing woman and her friend That's awesome. It's so good at finding people now The friend didn't get Mike's info, but she felt like he could have been her soulmate Let's not put that in the TikTok video Mike's gonna get a hold of you Luckily the TikToker shared a short video of Mike and added that the only other thing they knew about him was his friends kept chirping at him chanting Mike Mike Mike So well, it's unclear if he saw the video Laura did Laura is Mike's wife In the comments, I mean they were just dancing right in the comments She said hi, I'm Michael's wife. He's busy explaining this to our two children right now Someone asked if she was sure this was the right guy and she said oh yep, that's him The guy I said forever two over ten years ago I think it was a little bit more than just the innocent dance Another person also said I'm Mike's grandmother and I'm also mad at him That's funny, but it was probably just a joke But either way it sounds like Mike is in a heap of trouble So think twice before you try to track down a mystery connection you met at a bar Dude whose friends are chanting on a married guy when he's dancing Was he needed to have some fun after ten years of marriage bro, how about you give him a break like Mike's wife doesn't let him dance My wife is probably dying to go dancing We do not want to expose people and get Mike in trouble again, so Yes, poor Mike. Let's go to your next laser story out of great ideas incorporated A startup called Reflect Orbital was saying that when it's dark outside They want to be the ones to deliver something called on-demand sunlight This is crazy guys It does sound like science fiction, but it's real basically they want to send up Thousands of satellites with giant mirrors on them and those mirrors would reflect sunlight down to earth at night And all you'd have to do is open up an app drop a pin what and then sunlight will arrive at that location 32 Middle of the night I can't find my keys, but hold on let me just ping my location So pissed if I'm trying to sleep The main idea is to help solar farms keep producing energy after sunset Okay, but there's plenty of critics scientists are warning the extra light could confuse animals and disrupt our sleep It only works if it's a not cloudy night too, that's good point And some researchers say the math ain't math and yeah It would take literally thousands and thousands of satellites just to match a fraction of daylight And it's probably extremely expensive where you'd have to pay 10k for 30 seconds of sunlight You might as well just buy one of those sunrise clocks at that point Yeah Let's go to your final laser story out of family 101 There's a new parenting hack on social media that promises you can stop toddler tantrums and it's pretty simple Okay, all you have to do is shout Jessica But what if your kid doesn't name Jessica They don't need to be named Jessica and they don't need to know anybody else named Jessica But apparently this particular name works wonders and several parents swear by it a family physician weighed in and she said It's just the element of surprise of shouting a name really any name unexpectedly, but tiktokers disagree They've tried yelling Beth or Tiffany and it doesn't work the same Another expert says the Jessica hack works because the brain reacts differently to J names. Oh We're here and you're like wait what Jay What's going on? Would Jose work? No, he's have that just so yeah, Joe's work And so they'll stop to figure out what's happening and if this is true It means that the Jessica hack it won't work forever because children will start to recognize the pattern and the planes adapt and the Interruption loses its effect so you might have to pivot to a different one like Josephine Yeah, or Santa Claus. It's gotta be Jay Anything will work on Jose I feel like I do know the perfect place to try it out though This guy's house Last time I was there. I swear. I heard a sketch or scream. Oh god And it stopped me right Was not expecting that talking shoes. Yes That's how means laser stories has come to an end for the day. We'll do it again same time on Monday The dust has settled and the ink is dry we're less than 48 hours removed from April 1st Where companies across this great nation of ours push the limits of artificial intelligence To create the most ridiculous phony products you never knew you wanted We're talking a new ramen flavor that you've never dreamed of okay, and a pet accessory. I wish was true We're gonna give you the rundown of the best ones from April Fools coming up right after this April Fools, I mean it happened in the middle of the week this year and went by so quick We haven't really had a chance to even cover it Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Did you pull any pranks? Not personally, but we didn't have time But thanks to all the advancements with AI and social media It's easier than ever for companies to just type in a prompt to the computer and then post a funny AI photo and say ha We messed with you The laziest April Fools I've ever seen I mean honestly so now in 2026 There's more and more brands jumping on to the April shenanigans We're just gonna tell you a few of the ones that move the needle Okay, the best April Fools company pranks from this year. Oh, I like this Yeah, I didn't see very many good ones Yeah, so in case you missed it first up one of the bigger up-and-coming chain restaurants right now is Raisin Canes Yeah fried chicken place the lines are forever as soon as one opens and they're mostly famous for their tasty sauce Oh my gosh, so Canes leaned into that by announcing a new chicken sauce flavored cola It looks like a really thick creamy Coming out of the fountain. Oh, I mean some people would honestly probably be excited about sure Yeah, you need your meal to be thicker So I've got a lot of engagement up next you probably heard of the product called dude wipes Like baby wipes, but they have to make a masculine so men will use Flushable toilet wipes designed for men. Hey by the way, you shouldn't flush those even though they say flushable just Yeah, it causes huge issues in the sewer system Throw them away. I'm trusting the box That's where you want to put it well on April 1st they unveiled a new skincare product called but masks Yeah Good they call it quote the first targeted hydro gel patch designed for your third eye Pop it directly into the target zone for 15 minutes while you doom scroll on the phone. I like that. It says let it rip Yeah, if you're just joining us we're talking about the most viral April Fool's pranks that were done by major brands this year So these are not real if you're just tuning in although probably a few people did fall for them We're gonna go right to this next one Uggs posted their social media a brand new Ugg Brella Which is a tiny colorful umbrella that clips onto the top of your sheepskin boots to protect them from the rain Yeah, it's pretty cute and it makes sense because those Uggs they get wet. Yeah, not waterproof Alexis I could definitely see you wearing these These are cool enough they should have to do them Make a mandatory next up a new product from a company called Terry's chocolate They shared a photo of a phone case with a tiny pouch Designed to carry some heat-controlled chocolate for any emergency So if you're riding the bus and you're scrolling on tiktok and you feel like your blood sugar is getting low you're covered On the end of your phone it looks very connected to the phone like you'd have to like literally chew on the back of your phone Maybe you have to look it right off Also a collab that promises quote a peanut buttery glaze with a crispy crunchy goodness Doesn't sound bad Jeff talk about top ramen butterfinger edition Oh Both but not together not far from Pad Thai though, right? This one I can almost believe because they've come out with all sorts of new flavors like the chicken wing ramen remember that Do we have macaroni and cheese ice cream and people loved it? Flipping the script on the noodle gang. They actually made maple syrup and pancake ramen. Oh remember that no Do remember the breakfast ramen? Yes? Well, I could see them going the opposite making a dessert butterfinger ramen and people loving it I think the only shocking thing they come out with now is a real ramen Chicken show you That's no fun There's a couple other phony food collabs. I should mention that happened on April Fool's there was Heinz matcha Mayo a Green colored mayonnaise, you know what? Maybe that would make Mayo better to me. I like Oh Why don't we just saying that all these are good ideas? You do not expect that I'm not really There's a packaged ice cream soup from Baskin Robbins. He's just getting better as we go More milkshake and my favorite from Red Lobster Cheddar Bay biscuit pop tarts Does that look good to you? I Do not have savory pop tart The whole thing is filled with cheese and then the outside looks like a red lobster biscuit Calm down Pop tart to make this happen I will say a lot of the people in the comments said they would sell out instantly if they really made them people would 100% go for it. We could do an egg and Okay, we'll move on from Do you remember we talked a little while ago about Reese's peanut buttercup toothpaste? Dude, I'm so on the maple and bacon pop tart. That could work. Let's move forward. I remember. This is peanut buttercup toothpaste That was a real thing. Yes. Well, what about Keebler's hollow tree cookie toothpaste? I told you a listener texted and had ordered the Reese's toothpaste and loved it This isn't really good prank Keebler's Each one is flavored like your favorite Keebler cookie. That was their April Fool's Companies are just coming up with disappointment to me But it wasn't just food and drink brands that were getting in on the April Fool's action a pet company called spot and tango did one where Like you've seen doggy poo bags. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we this company released doggy pee bags With the tagline a cleaner future for sidewalks everywhere Finally you've heard of Hall's cough drops Well for April 1st, they wanted to come up with a brand new Nostalgic flavor that'd be good for the old and the young. Oh, it's a mixture of lavender and lint Grand ma's purse It's been sitting at the bottom of your Nana's handbag for the past seven years We're kind of 50-50 on some of these April Fool's pranks we do want some we don't want others Which ones you like the most Textin 7592 those were the biggest April Fool's brand jokes that companies did this past year Fontaf's coming up right after this It's almost time for your prank call to Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning and today We reach out to a guy whose wife went to a charity auction the other night Without him it had something to do with her work and she was already downtown anyway So she went came home and didn't mention anything significant happening. Okay, so in my Imagine the husband's surprise when he gets a call from one of the organizers thanking him for their Extremely generous donation It's your phone tap right now Hello Hi, is Kevin or Pamela in? Well, this is Kevin. How can I help you? Hi Kevin? This is Harvey Dart I just wanted to call and say thank you so much for your generous donation last night At the charity banquet Yeah, I didn't go to the event my wife did oh Yeah, I guess it was something connected to her work downtown Got it. Well, will you just please send on the message that allies? Thanks her for her generous donation of $5,000 What five grand are you kidding me? I'm not kidding. We're very grateful Oh, I'm sure you are who you with again allies Yes, it stands for affluent lawyers leveraging influence for early sentences Okay, we need to back up here, but what what's this charity? What are you doing because I wasn't there and I had no idea she was gonna spend that amount of money Okay, I understand it's basically a fund that helps already well-off attorneys pull some strings to get there less than desirable clients out of jail faster What? Yes, and with your generous $5,000 donation You've helped put at least three convicted felons back out onto the streets giving them another chance Hold on a second that doesn't sound good what you just said Well, I mean if you were one of the freed criminals who had his assault charges dropped then it would sound good That's not even worse. I'm so how so? How's it worse? I mean it's already confusing enough that the name of your charity is allies Well, I'm sure my wife got confused by that. Okay. Well in our defense It's better than the acronym that we had before which was cash counselors assisting scumbags home What's good about putting criminals back out on the street? You said earlier that you weren't at the event, right? That is true last night one of our highest billers his name is Phil McDougal You probably heard of him but Phil talked about getting a guy nicknamed fatal off of his third home invasion charge Wait what really moving? This is starting to sound like some kind of joke and I'm not into it Oh, no, no, no, it was actually one of the biggest challenges of his life And he couldn't get the charges dropped without your donation I mean I mean not yours. It was someone else's but your donation will help a criminal in the future We're gonna put stop payment on that check so you better return it cuz your charity sounds like worse Okay, I think you're not considering all the positive after effects that it has did you know your contribution is non-tax deductible We're not even getting a break on it. No, so the IRS and we're absolutely is putting stop payment on this Okay, well at this point we already have the cash in our account and there's not a lot we can do So I'll be getting that money. I will absolutely be getting that money You won't but you will be getting a thank-you card from a future freed criminal Wait what cuz we do provide the home address of any donation over a thousand dollars Are you out of your god-f**king mind? Yeah, so you should be expecting a thank-you card from someone like fatal Probably no, you're not doing anything like that and no one's coming to the house Don't be ridiculous just cuz a criminal has your address and knows you have a lot of money to donate That doesn't mean they're gonna show up and rob you No, no, no, I don't need I need the name of your general counsel and I need to know where the hell that I'm getting this check back from And it better be in my hot hand manana Got it. That's Spanish for next year Hey, I would have just requested you tell your wife the charity and the prank call that we did were both a massive success You said what I said prank call was a big success cuz Pamela listens to a radio show It's called broken Jeffrey morning That's why you're getting phone tap right now by me. I'm Jeff Dude, I'm gonna strangle you through this phone We have criminals that can do that for you for you free them You sounded so shocked when you heard what the charity was actually for I Might not be able to sleep tonight. No, you could help a convicted convict named diesel get off of his burglary charge He wants to come to your house and thank you in person Getting line. Oh, yeah, fatal's going to meet you first You'll get along great On the 20s Most men tend to have similar thoughts running through their mind at the end of a first date Oh, okay, where the thinking is now the right time to go in for a kiss Do I ask them to stay the night? Should I tell my mom to leave the apartment once we start rounding second base? It might be nice to have her in the other room just for moral support I Don't know Yeah, but one of our listeners says the only question he was asking at the end of the night was What the heck just happened? Oh? He still has no idea what went wrong, but something must have based on how it ended You're gonna hear it in your brand new second date update right after this broken Jeffrey in the morning second date update Today we have a quote-unquote returning listener His name is Jason. Why quote-unquote? Well, he says he's been on the show before for this very segment and you don't believe him Well, I gotta be honest I looked back into the archives and I can't find his call anywhere So was he really on the show? No, is he making it up just to sound cool because that's totally what I would do But I guess we might be forced to believe him I mean Jason can you at least jog our memory and tell us what happened the last time that you? Supposedly were on with us. You guys had me on twice. Wait. Oh wait. You were on more than once We did an update update. Did we just never air it? Yeah, are you a boring guy? Well, I'll start from the beginning that yeah, I was dating this girl Emily and She said that she didn't want to go back out on a date with me because I had a hard time saying no She wanted a guy that could push back more stand up for his thoughts and opinions And that's what you guys were helping me out with So you went out with a woman who wanted her boyfriend to say no to her does that sound realistic bro? I love a man who can make a choice. Yeah Decision is one of the most unsexy traits. Yeah, so you said you were on for an update update That means you two were together what happened? Well, I started being able to stand up for myself from time to time and we actually did end up dating for a little bit there All right Why did it end? Okay, she broke up with me because she got a dog and she wanted to name it spinner and Taking your guys advice. I was like no, that's a dumb name Why would you tell me man? That's horrible. It's not your dog That is kind of mean No, I said you need to name it a cute human name like Kevin because that's like funny That's kind of what she said I didn't back down So I was like no you're not naming the dog spinner and she ended up breaking up with me I bet her and spinner are really happy though for real After you gave her exactly what she wanted a guy that says no and then she didn't like that Hard to decipher what women really want But good guess because I am now dating a different girl her name is Riley No human name, so he's okay with it. Okay. We like her name Humans with human names are okay Okay, that's a bold stance to take but good for you. Okay, so here's the problem the date only lasted about 15 minutes Do we even consider it a date that way? Did you plan on it being a quick date? I planned a whole day. Oh, so I picked her up at her place And it's just like a normal date, you know, how's your day? Where are we going like what's going on nice to meet each other stuff? Mm-hmm, and then all the sudden we're barely Ten minutes down the road and she just says I think it's best if we don't go out Before you even get to the destination where you're driving to yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah like the AC barely got the car cool Okay, did you see like that's a cheap and a shovel in the back seat and that's why she wanted to turn around No, I Kind of thought I mean I never tried to catfish everybody all my pictures are current online But I'm like thinking okay. She probably got in the car thought I was ugly Want to go back home. Oh, is that fair Alexis does that happen a lot? Why are you laughing? Why are you giggling about him thinking that he's ugly? Your first thought man put that aside. I mean if she didn't think you were ugly. What else like was anything else happened Shovel No, I said that's where I said like what do you mean like you want to go back right now? The only thing she gave me was that it just wasn't what she expected Like I mean I don't know exactly what she meant by that, but she obviously want to talk about it Okay, did you use your the lessons that you learned from before and say no you're staying in this car and we are going on this That's a great idea Jeff. I think that's a romantic move. I think it's kidnapping Yeah, they quite go there But I dropped her off and that that was kind of it So maybe this isn't the best question to ask but I need to know was there a kiss Funny if they made up passionately and then they left no Oh No, no, I brought her I bought her flowers It's just like she just threw him in the back seat of the car got out left them Afterwards no response. I guess I'm not shocked, but like I just want clarity And it sounds like even if she did say ugly you could take it. I mean, yeah Yeah, I'm a solid six. There we go. All right. Okay. That's not bad. There you go. We can work with a six Yeah, you're more attractive anybody in this room. That's right. Look how high Brooks voice is going like yeah isn't bad I believe you Let's see what Riley has to say if we can get her on the phone. We'll try and get you your second second date update on this show Memorable guy After remember him right after this hold on brook and Jeffrey in the morning second date update If you're just joining us, we've got a return caller Jason on the phone who describes himself as a solid six But is he in New York six or an Idaho? There is a difference There's somebody for everybody even an Idaho four out there. All right, but he only brought up his own looks because after just 10 minutes Of driving together Jason's date suddenly changed her mind and said actually this isn't what I was expecting And she has to be taken home So his thought was well, maybe she just didn't think I was attractive enough in person Like she finally looked left 10 minutes into the drive and was like oh my gosh What if it's not about him? What if she wasn't wearing the right outfit? You know like Explain what they were gonna do for the date and she's like I don't have tennis shoes. No You said hold on. Let me run inside real quick. I'll be right back. He's trying to make it not about sad It's possible Jason. Have you considered that Riley hates herself a little bit How she looks And considering that I might hate myself a little bit now He never got any specific answer on what was such a letdown So that's what he's hoping to get today at a bare minimum and then maybe we'll see where it goes from there Maybe the first time the hope is that she thinks he's ugly. Yeah People who both don't find themselves attractive could be meant for each other That's the optimism that you wanted right bro. I just think she wasn't prepared for whatever he had planned that day Okay, well we can all hope for different things. Okay, she's made he's ugly. Yeah could be the perfect Okay, Jason, I'm gonna call her here in a second, but real quick. How was she looking that night your opinion? Better than a six pretty good There you go, I won't quote you directly on that but yeah, let's dial her number and see what she has to say here we go Hello, hey, we're looking to speak with Riley Speaking all right. Hey Riley. This is a radio show. We're called broken Jeffrey in the morning. Welcome. Good morning. Welcome to it Riley Hi, hey, how you doing? I'm sorry, who is this? That hurts every time. Yeah, but now we're radio show we're called broken Jeffrey in the morning And this is a segment that we do called the second date update Okay, I know you're not a woman who likes her time to be wasted so I'm gonna get right to this You went out with a listener of our show a guy named Jason and He told us the date didn't go how he thought it was gonna go. It didn't really go at all. Yeah We didn't really go out. Yeah, we're sorry about that. That sucks, huh? No, not really. Oh, right. We heard it was your idea to not continue the date But Jason is a little bit confused on why you felt that way Yeah, I mean, I don't know how he could be but Really, you think it's something that obvious Yeah, I mean we were in the car and he said we're going to this restaurant. I know the restaurant I like the restaurant and then when I'm in the car, he's like, oh, I didn't make a reservation And I was like, you know, it's a busy night like you probably should have made a reservation He's like, oh, well, I don't know any other restaurants in the area. Okay, but we have phones So just Google but he's like, you know, it's fine. We can just stand outside and do like small talk. Oh That's an awful backup plan like we need to adjust, you know, he should have Planning before you even get to the restaurant though What's going through your mind? I'm curious. It sounds like an argument you have like Oh, you didn't make reservations, of course you didn't you never put any effort into these date So Brooks saying it sounds like you belong together We absolutely don't Okay, I don't want my time wasted like I don't know why you think like I can just stand outside for 45 minutes It's a Friday night. Like I'd rather hang out with my friends. Maybe he just misspoke You know, maybe he meant like we'd go to a bar will walk down the street and see if there's something else while we wait I said that and he then clarified. I was like, oh, you mean like get you know a drink and Or somewhere next door and he's like, no, we can just stand outside so we don't miss our name He sounds like a type of person that arrives five hours early for a yeah I can understand how that would be a red flag for Riley where he doesn't plan ahead enough and she's feeling like He doesn't value her time. That's a fix. I mean, why wouldn't you make that clear to him in that point? Like hey, it doesn't feel like you really care about your time with me. Well, I did say I I don't think we're a good fit Do you mind just dropping me back off and he said fine? So I thought it was clear Okay Well, we value your time very much and that's why we don't want to waste any more of your time and letting you know That Jason is listening to this phone call right now. He's actually been on it the entire time and wants to talk to you What yeah, yeah Jason are you there? Hey Riley Hey, are you just making all that stuff up cuz you think I'm ugly and you're not trying to hurt my feelings Stick into his first theory, why would you say that Jason? That's not what she said at all. I Was just that is it illegal to ask? Sounds like it's something that's in your head a lot. Well, it's good to get it out of the way Do you find Jason attractive or not Riley? I? Mean I wouldn't have gone on the date if I didn't find you attractive I was interested but your lack of planning just felt like you didn't care and you just thought you could you know It's been kind of arrogant Yeah, she's mad about you not having a full plan. It sounds like no It's not that I didn't have a plan the plan was just called vibes. You know what I mean I Were adults that's not a thing you're not gonna waste my Friday night with just vibes But why didn't you pivot and say oh shoot we have a 45 minute wait Let's pop by next door and discover a new spot if we got there and there was like a place next door You know I wouldn't say that I was opposed to that necessarily I just thought it'd be better to make sure that our name could we could hear our name because what if we missed it all Together that'd be bad at least we got to the core and know exactly what the issue was that caused the problem on this date So why don't Riley Jason you two talk to each other? See if there's some natural chemistry when you just are left alone to your own devices go ahead Jason why don't you start it off? Okay, now we got past that little speed bump here Riley if I've made reservations This time are you in to go is that if that was the only thing that was holding it back? I don't know I think you have a lot of self-esteem issues going on No, there's no self-esteem issues. I know exactly where I said I'm a solid six. We know this we've been over this That was you but yeah, just because everything didn't go exactly your way. I think we're already learning how to compromise I think this is a beautiful partnership I've shown you that I can take criticism and respond in a favorable manner who doesn't want growth in their relationship I do appreciate that the jumping to conclusions that I thought you were ugly kind of makes me nervous Why well no let him respond I Just went over the self-confidence Jason well like I said before I feel like I'm about a six and I feel like you're probably around the same area It's a good match, you know, we're both not classically attractive You already turned it around Hold on hold on Riley Bees are heart beating fast hearing Jason say that to you. I Definitely the most romantic thing I've ever heard Well I'm gonna take that at face value and ask would you like to go out on another date with Jason because we'd pay for it And we'd put the reservation in for him Absolutely not Good Jason man, I'm sorry that we couldn't get this to work out between you and Riley But hey, we look forward to your third attempt at a second date update where we'll definitely remember who you are We got to make a note or something on him. Yeah, he's Jason the six Something we really didn't get to break down too much during that is it rude to ditch someone just because they didn't make Reservations before the date and you didn't find out till you're in the car Like what's a good point or was she justified in telling him to turn around the car text in 78592 because I'm genuinely curious Okay, I gotta say she was a little justified if you're on the way To a nice date and the person tells you on the way No, I didn't make a reservation and you know, you're gonna have to stand out for two hours I'd be like whoa whoa whoa whoa. Yeah, I'm here for the food not for the company So at all But I will say at least you didn't cost him any money It was all out of control because I agree he probably should have made a reservation But I do think it was harsh to call everything off just because there was no serious plan Well, it wasn't just that it was that he wouldn't even pivot to go get a drink next door I mean, even go to Denny's yeah Whatever it was it didn't work out for Jason this time around. I'm sure he'll be back. Oh, yeah, promise you he will Will we remember him? We need one of those customer cards where you get a punch every time you But no matter who you are if you've been on once twice a million times. We're always here to help Email the show we'll call that person who's not calling you back You go find all of our second dates wherever you find them online get it at your podcast at broken Jeffrey in the morning There's some impressive noise records that have been set over the years like the Kansas City chief stadium set the crowd noise record at 142.2 decibels And only five people went totally deaf Taylor Swift concerts set the record for most women all screaming at one Once not at their boyfriends There is another record And it's a tie between Brooke and Jose for who registered loudest moan while eating their lunch Every day But today I predict we're gonna set a new noise mark Loudest booing during a live performance Because this time it won't just be Jose Alexis and Brooke doing it Oh, all the listeners will be booing along together as I butcher my brand Because it's coming up right after this you suck It is time for my song of the week In the morning and so much is happening over the next few days. It was tough to decide which event do I focus on? Because there's satin pillow fight day national fish fingers and custard day and of course International Day of Landmine Awareness which Very very important for us to be thinking about and you want to be aware of those definitely But I've been checking my socials and shockingly the holiday most people seem to be excited for is Easter Like To a mom friend literally this morning, she's like did you know Easter those this weekend? But what's the thing that people are looking forward to the most I think many would say the annual egg hunt Where children are let loose to go gather as many plastic eggs filled with candy as humanly possible That's right, and most of the time those events they run pretty smooth I would say as long as the adults don't create a scene and get in the way, but every once in a while If you're picturing like 40 to 50 children there There's always that one kid who's had a few too many grape jelly beans with his Easter brunch And he's just got that look on his face where he's like I know this isn't a contest, but I am going to win this Yeah, I wanted to win so badly and I was so terrible at it I would get so flustered like oh my god. What way do I go? No, and then you have awful eyes And then the eggs gone by the time I get there. No, see I'm not talking about that kid that just wants to win I'm talking about the kid that will stop at nothing to come out on top Willing to do anything it takes to make sure he comes away with the most candy of anyone there He's stealing the other kids baskets. That is who my song is dedicated to today The sugar crazed ruthless child who has vowed to come out on top at the Easter hunt no matter what it takes To the egg hunt bully. Is that who you're I am the egg And I needed a song that captured that level of unhinged anarchy So instead of doing the hit by Green Day basket case it's young Jefferies basket chase Very well, you just had an H and the whole thing changes beautiful If you see this kid do not try to stop him or get him his way just let him have it Okay, it's better for everyone. So I'm gonna point when I'm ready here we go points Do you know I spied on that Easter bunny guy, so I'd win all the candy in the egg hunt I don't follow those dumb play fair Easter rules So best stay out the way this chocolate Sometimes I get hopped up on peeps Like a gussies glue the way I eat I Want more Reese's Cups I Lucas I think your dad is leaving the park without you you better go You can't prove it me Who pushed you in that tree? Not sure how your shoelaces came to be found My hands wanted yours now your basket on the floor You thought you had four eggs, but now you're three down Yeah, I run faster in my I take a cry for cat Berry I'll lie and tell your mom That your soul eggs on my palm Until yelling you'll be forced to give them Wait, Olivia. Is that a blue egg you have? I heard the blue ones have vegetables in them this year Like broccoli and cabbage and stuff. Let me take that one your basket Cuz I cut the bottom Sweetie you need to leave some candy for the other kids. I am it doesn't look like it I'm leaving the bad ones with almonds in them. No, honey. That's not being fair. Is it? Oh my god, mom It's an Easter hunt not a soup kitchen Let me win this thing please mom to cause a panic all yeah Those eggs I dropped are not her My dad says that's enough I said hey I Hey, Aiden don't search over here I heard there's a bunch of eggs right across that four-lane street and you don't even have to use the crosswalk to get there Yeah, hurry right before someone else Pastel colored M&M's my favorite Every inch matters bro when it comes to winning Easter egg hunt come on now I hope that kid made it out of the street. Okay. I heard a car crash. Yeah, that was just Alexis trying to parallel park I think I missed him That was your song of the week for Easter good luck to all your children at this year's egg hunt We swung kid we're gonna post a video up on all of our socials at Brooke and Jeffrey you can see the lyrics there Text it in 7592 you can tell us what you thought about the song Because this weekend is Easter or at least that's what my Christian friends keep saying We're gonna be doing a special holiday edition of trivia with Brooke where all the questions will be Easter themed And today taking you on in some Easter trivia is return player will will welcome back to the show Thanks guys. How are you doing today? Have you gone and visited the Easter Bunny at the mall and gotten a creepy picture yet? Will oh god no Or have you gone to church and yelled I will return That's good. You get it will I got it. I got it. You can use that. I'll give that one The generosity this Easter just keeps on going Let's generously tell Brooke to get out of here so we can get to the game He got 30 seconds to answer as many questions as possible if you don't know when you can say pass But you have to beat Brooke outright if you want to win. Are you ready? Let's do it. Good luck. Well your time starts now. What is the official flower of Easter? Daisy behind chocolate bunnies and peeps. What's the third most popular brand of Easter candy? Reese's the song here comes Peter Cottontail reach number five on the billboard hot 100 in what decade? Seven which holidays the most popular church day of the year Easter or Christmas According to a survey of 5,000 Americans. What is the worst tasting flavor of jelly bean? Oh the black licorice one Went right to a well done William now Brooke is coming back into the studio And it says here on my screener will it looks like you might be leaving our Location soon and moving to st. Louis to be with your family Thinking about it. I'm so 50-50, but I'm going towards that way Follow the arch man, that's waiting for you. Well, you know what if this happens we are gonna miss you So we're gonna take this time to reminisce over the three losses that you've already had against Brooke About a year and a half ago will lost four to two Those were good days then around nine months ago You lost three to one and then in a close one you lost five to four Happy times when you think back on your life here in this area You're gonna think of getting donkey punched by Brooke over and over again You can lose from anywhere in the country Anywhere in the world really really it's amazing now Brooke. It's your turn. Are you ready? Yes your time starts now What is the official flower of Easter? Lily behind chocolate bunnies and peeps. What's the third most popular brand of Easter candy? Reese's here the song here comes Peter Cottontail reach number five on the billboard hot 100 in what decade? Oh 50s Which holiday is the most popular church day of the year Easter or Christmas? According to the survey of 5,000 Americans. What's the worst tasting flavor of jelly bean? Oh black licorice? That's it answers are in we're gonna go to the scoreboard to see how you bolted with Jose Have you seen the Easter bunny who comes on Easter morning? Blanios Well, you got two correct. Oh All right. All right. Okay. All right and Brooke Lisa have one more memory of losing to Brooke before you move over to st. Louis, so that's kind of fun Move it's okay. Why move when you get to have experiences like this? It's fun Let's go over the answers for everyone the official flower of Easter is the Lily the white Lily specifically it represents Resurrection behind chocolate bunnies and peeps Reese's peanut butter eggs are the third most popular brand of Easter candy I'm sorry. It's the best Reese's shape there is I know it's really good them in the pumpkins The song here comes Peter Cottontail reach number five on the billboard hot 100 in the 1950s Between Easter and Christmas Easter is the most popular church day of the entire year with 93% of the congregation showing up Pastors are so nervous for this Sunday like oh man. What are we gonna do to keep him here? How are we gonna keep them? The year and out of a survey of 5,000 Americans they say the worst tasting flavor of jelly bean is licorice Yes, do you like black licorice will I love it? I'll eat it Yeah, it's candy. So well, thank you for playing it wasn't enough to win But just for being on the show, we're giving you a pair of tickets to see Charlie Puth perform at WAMU Theater Sunday May 3rd Well, we're really gonna miss you around here, you know, make sure you write us. Okay, don't be a stranger People say that when they move town Thanks for playing man stay in touch with us. We're gonna do win Brooks bucks same time on Monday