Caroline Rhea & Kym Whitley: Spying & Stolen Purses

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Really? Really? Jeff Lewis has issues. Hey, welcome to Jeff Lewis has issues. In today's episode, Caroline Ray and Kim Whitley joined the show. We talk about spying on cheating boyfriends, stolen purses and dating younger men. I'm your new host, Ryan Bailey, sitting with me as always. My main gal, Sarah Kelowna. Sarah, how's the weather out there today? Hey, what's going on, Ryan? Not much, Sarah. Oh, it's up in the magic world. Oh, it is magical. Yeah. Today, we have some amazing guests that we're just waiting for right now. Tell us a little bit about those guests, Sarah. Well, you made Jeff disappear, apparently. I truly am magic and a miracle worker. Yeah. He brought us back. Oh, thank you so much. Yeah. Sometimes Jameson will play a promo, but I figured one or the other would happen. And we did it. Ryan's going. Ryan, why have you here? You are considered a TV movie critic, kind of a poor man's, like, you know... Yeah, I would agree with that. What is your take on the Valley Persian style? Even if I didn't know MJ and Reza, it is such a good show. Those first two episodes are really solid. There's enough of like, it's actual grown-ups having conversations, but they're still mess. You have Gigi in her credit score. You have MJ and Tommy, MJ and her mom. You have Reza and his husband, but also new characters that you're actually fascinated by and having real conversations. So that's like a high recommend, you know, like just the first two episodes were excellent. I don't want it to get lost in the shuffle of how many shows are out there right now with Traders, Beverly Hills, The Pit. Thursday night is stacked, but I'm telling you, go to Peacock, watch these first two episodes. Tonight is the third episode. We want shows like this to be able to thrive and survive, especially on Bravo. So I highly recommend it. Glowing recommendation. This is really, no, that was really good. Like, don't be a magician. You're really good at that. Just stick with that. You know what I mean? That was really good. I agree with you. I very much, it very much sucked me in and I'm invested already. I hate Tommy, and I'm sure the rest of the viewers do too. Yeah, I haven't watched it yet, but that's what I've, but one thing I have her, I want, I have it on my, but it is interesting because you sense his insecurity that he masks with extreme, extremely horrible jokes and picking at MJ and that just does not work. And then she gets it from her mom. But in this past week's episode, her mom actually stood up for her with Tommy and Mercedes wasn't even used to her mom sticking up for her, which just really tells you something about Mercedes and what she's grown up with and now what she has been married to. And, you know, she was on Watch What Happens Live and she did great last week and just said, hey, listen, I love him. You know, I do love him. That is, I don't know how. I think he's disgusting. I think he's trash. Oh, now I want to watch it just to see. Honestly, and I'm just curious just because I'm so privy to the behind the scenes. Yeah. And I'm curious what I feel the same way if I wasn't. I think, I think, I mean, there's no redeeming, sorry, there's nothing redeeming about him on the show so far on the show. But don't you don't even think part of it's because you love her and you care about her? Right? Like, I mean, it's part of it. You're more passionate about it because of that or is it sort of just a little bit? Probably, but he doesn't look like a great guy so far. Oh, okay. Yeah, I don't know. It's the traders I love. I heard you got. I was so excited that you said you watched the first three episodes. Like, I've been wanting you to get into that show forever. Isn't it so good? It's so good. And I promise Monroe, because it's something now we're doing together. Yeah, you can do it. She comes home Monday. So I can't, even though it comes out Friday, I can't watch it till Monday when Monroe comes home. But you can just act like you didn't watch it with her. I kind of want to watch it with her. That's fine. You have Persian style. You have Salt Lake. You have Beverly Hills. And I keep hearing about Landman. I think I'm going to try. Yeah, second season of Landman. I'm going to jump into Landman. I haven't seen the first season. Yeah. I'm going to jump in. I don't know. The first season, I couldn't watch it because they just keep all these older men just keep sexualizing this girl. She plays like a teenager in it, but I guess she's older than that. But she plays a young, she plays one of the daughters. I think Billy Bob's daughter. And every guy's like, oh my God, she's so hot. And they all, like all these old men, handle themselves around her. And I'm like, that's not how men are. Well, turn to your right. Yeah. Well, not all of them. Why don't we bring Kim Whitley in? Is she ready? Is that Kim? Hi, Kim. She is rare. She's just in the green room. She's very excited. You're not going to pull her away from Ty. Oh, that's right. Because they met last time, right? And they became fast friends. This should have his phone number or something. I've no idea. I've met him like five times, never gotten his number. I have no idea. Really? Yeah, not once. Ty offered Sarah a new dress. Ryan Bailey, thank you so much for being here. Thank you. Sarah Kelowna. And remember, just, you know, keep your eyes up tonight. Yeah, card tricks. When you're at the party. Yes. Love you, Sarah. See you tonight. Thank you. All right, Kim Whitley's coming in. She looks gorgeous. Oh, wow. Someone's doing press today. She looks good. All right. Wow. A pump off, Caroline. I'm going to sip it. Come on in. How are you? Caroline, what's up? Y'all got me some tea. Where's the champagne? Do you want champagne? Do we have champagne? We might in our locker. Oh, my God. Are you kidding me? I thought we were doing the big... I have to change. No, Caroline. It's fine. You're good. She's dressed as a Vegas showgirl. No, she's dressed as a whore. We sit down to get on the... Okay, you're all right. Come on in. Wow, that is so cute. You know what? I thought the Golden Globes were last weekend. But why do I look like a manager? You could have told me what we're wearing. First of all, have you ever even seen a horror post? And why would I be wearing it? We're supposed to be Vegas showgirls. Oh, because we're going to do Vegas. Oh, my God. I didn't even know Caroline could dress like this. I've known her for 30 years. She does look like... Sorry, a prostitute. What are you talking about? You do not look like a prostitute. A really good one, though. Thank you. High end. High end. Very expensive. Excuse me. I have a onesie. I can put it back on. So what... Why are you sick? What's the matter? Oh, he has a throat issue. I had the flu last weekend. I'm over the... Right, flu, eh? No, no, listen. I'm over the flu. Now this is a secondary infection. It's like bronchitis or walking pneumonia. Yeah, that's what they say. Yes, don't worry. Antibiotics, steroid. I kept telling everyone it was like cortisone. It's predisone. And then just dayquil, mucinex, you know, just those kind of things. Any drug that you could get your hands on that is like... Pretty much. Yeah, okay. They are flu. All the zones. Sure. How about stop swallowing bad shit? Oh, I'm so... Who are you? You've called me a whore and they've offended the host. It's five seconds. Let me tell you something. You come to this show. Baby, let me tell you something. They play no games here. You got to come in fully loaded. I know that you already have your zone, but don't you dare to use extra time? Oh, yeah, I can put your headphones on. Yeah. I didn't think about that. I brought you some Nuca Honey throat loss injuries. And I put them on. Thank you. Nice little jar. You got to suck on these. Thank you so much, Ken. Which probably got you in trouble in the first place. I'm sorry. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. I'm too low, too low, too low. Ouch, yeah, too low. Just right. Splash shaming. Well, we were just... I don't know everybody. Hello. Did you see the tall black man in the green room? No. Oh, girl. Is that your boy friend? Yes. Oh, wow. Sagittarius. Aren't you an Aries? Yes. That's right. What do you think about Sagittarius? Perfect. I mean, wow. Yeah. You'll both... Do you follow astrology? What does she? Of course I do. I mean, there'll be a lot of like, hey, honey, I brought home an extra friend in the vibe. I mean, they're very popular Sagittarius. Sagittarius. They like to... You're sort of a one man man, actually, when you're in it. Yes, I am. And they are a little bit like the party. I didn't... Life of the party. I don't know. In my case, well, I don't know. We're so fiercely loyal. We're pathetic. Yes. So you're an Aries. Oh, yeah. When's your birthday? April 13, 1994. And I... That's a good one. No one asked a year. I just want to tell them. Caroline Ray, I've been a fan for years. I think most people know you from Sabrina, the Teenage Witch. But where did we have so much fun? We were sitting together somewhere. You and I. Is it possible I could have been on your talk show? No. Because I thought maybe I was, but... She said we were having fun. I'm sorry, is it my roast? You're so mean. Why are you being so mean today? But you know what we have to do? Having fun. Do you know how I met her? She was stealing something out of my purse and I stopped her. That's how you met? Yeah. Yeah. In my dressing room at Carolins, I was like, oh, there's this lovely woman. Comedy club in your... She's going through my purse, but that's okay. Hi. What were you trying to find? I was trying to see whose purse it was. It was in a room. Sure. A dressing room. It was in a dressing room. They had my name on it. A lot of people... That was a lie. A lot of people. I love how she offers me these lozenges, but then she's taking them herself. And she doesn't even hand them over. No, she's not going on a pop tart. And I'm sucking on one of those. Here. Not on air. Up high. Can you hand that to... Thank you. Oh, you gave it to him. Yes. That is the best. Kim, can you introduce me to your friends? Yes, please. Okay, first of all, this is James. And what do we call him? Hi. The gayest. No. Pass around. Pass around. That's right. Party. Pass around. Party favor. Bottom. Bottom. I'll take it. I'll take the gayest. Why are gay... Pass around. Like, why are they... Like, grinder and everything. Why is it not like... Shouldn't you swipe up or down? And that would tell you what it was? Oh, what a cute idea. That's a great idea. I want to top him. I want to bottom for him. Yeah. Up and down. Swip swipe. Very cute. Just to give the realm, Robin, this is Shane, Jeff's chief of staff. Hi, Shane. How are you? Capricorn. Capricorn. Okay. Oscar. He gets your stuff done. But this is... Yeah. We're very simpatico. That's a fight you don't want to be around for. This is Oscar, associate producer who takes those calls. And then this is... Never met him before. What sign are you? Lot of... Taurus. Lot of childhood trauma there. Okay. He's a lot. I'm an Aries. Jeff and I are both Aries. What day are you? April 9th. April. He's March. March 24th. What are you? And that's where you're Aries. And then this is Annie, Jeff, social media. Never keep her clothes on. And what? I'm sorry. Sorry. I'm sorry. Just come out. Well, she's going through a breakup, so she's allowed to go through her slutty phase. I'm sorry. Send my slutty phase. You're absolutely... Do you want to borrow this outfit apparently? Yeah. Like a prostitute. Thank you. No, but you look good, Caroline. The whole point was, okay, one, you said dress like a show girl. I took it literally. And we are doing a Vegas show together, so I thought we were promoting it. But I didn't get the memo. For the listeners, we should say Caroline is wearing an all-black outfit. It's a corset with sequins. It's a Taylor Swift one. I literally got it off the... And then fishnets with feathers, and then a chiffon kind of cover-up. You really popped off. Thank you. I did pop off. I thought that meant you died, but I'm sure that popped off means something else, or that you had a peak moment in sex. But what just popped off me? Yes, thank you. I have to use it against my daughter later, because I use her language against her. I'll go, honey, dinner's ready, low key. She's like, come on, how you use it? It means you ate down, you slayed. I ate down? Yeah. That sounds more like what Neve was suffering from. That sounds like how he got that sore throat. He ate down. I slayed. I slayed. Yeah. Yeah, if I come home and I say to my daughter, darling, I slayed, she'll be like, did you hurt someone? Like, it just doesn't come out of my mouth, roughly. Your daughter's 17? Yeah. 17 and six feet tall, her goddaughter. And my goddaughter. Really? And so there's no discipline at six feet. Let me tell you. So you guys are very close, you two. Very close. I brought gifts in the green room for you. You too? And my baby. Can I ask you, do you live in Hancock Park? Well, does everyone have to know that? No, because I'm moving there, and I thought you might be a neighbor. OK, well, let's not give out addresses and things like that. No, we're not giving out address. It's a big city. Yeah, it is a big city. I might. I might be there. OK, that's what I thought. That's what I thought. One of her favorite places in the world. Yeah, it's pretty. But you wanted something terrible? During the fires last year? Oh, yeah. Kim had to evacuate? Yes. And the only damage to my house was that she dropped the fire extinguisher on the lawn and exploded and burned all of my grass. Right, whoo-hoo! That was worse. First of all, why did I have the fire extinguisher with me? I took it with me because I didn't know what we were going to run into. I took the fire extinguisher. Why did I have it? You're going to pull over on the 101 and put out a fire? Yeah, we're going to bring it into Caroline's house. I brought it down and dropped it and then exploded on the lawn. I'm like, yeah. And they're like, did you have any fire damage? I go, well, it's weird. I did. But it's from Kim. That's the only thing that happened. So the last? Kim bathed Joshua, her son, in the sink at my house. That's how long we have known each other. Wow. I mean, she was at my baby shower for eight, but we've known each other. And my father was in, oh no, we met each other. Both trying to have, never knew we'd have a kid. Oh no, it was the craziest. We never, we never thought. Yeah, and we got it right back to back. And we would cry about it because we thought, yeah, we were like, why, why did we care about our careers so much? All we want to do is we want to be mothers and have children. And then all of a sudden I call her and I'm like, you are not going to believe this. No, no, no, this is what you did. We were in Hawaii. Oh, right. You were doing a corporate event. Right. And you laid on the couch in the big suite and you pulled up your shirt and you said, look. And I was like, oh my God, you ate another burrito because she blows up when she's like, I couldn't believe it. Because she was showing me this bump on her stomach. It didn't look like a round bump. It looked like she ate too much. And she was like, I went crazy. I went crazy. I could not believe I was like, you're like really pregnant, like for real. And you know why I had to tell everybody? Because we were going swimming with dolphins and those bitches will rat you out. They will tell you if you're pregnant. Oh, the dolphins. Oh, the dolphins. They will. They were like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Pregnant. Right. So I couldn't go swimming with them. I got in with the dolphins. You did get in with the dolphins. Which was the craziest thing. Wait. The dolphins, they would not respond well if you got in the water? If you're pregnant, they get very upset around you. Like they won't swim around you. Really? Really? Yeah. Dolphins are so much smarter than all of us. Yeah, it's a trip. Yeah. They, I jumped out of the ocean. No. But they're so, they are terrifying. Like when they, when you stand there and then they, they go like this and they come through your legs and then they, I beg your pardon, and then they take you on like a ride. And then one second before they smash you into a brick wall, they let you go. And that sound they're making is a mocking laughter. That is, that is, that is the sound of a dolphin going. Wow, that sounds exactly. Yeah. This is very good. Very good impression. Hilarious. Was that Caroline? Those are trained. Wow. I have such useless skills. I can guess your sign and do a dolphin impression. That's it. Now the last time Kim Whitley was on, we had so much fun that we forgot to promote. Yes. We forgot to promote. We had so much, we were drinking to the same thing. I don't know if you know this, but then I had said to you, I'm going to go ahead and promote it on the next show, which I forgot. But then the next day, the next day I remembered. And so not only did I promote it, but now I bought 10 tickets front row. Front row. Yes. This Saturday to see you both. You did not. I swear to God. She is killing it. Okay. I am so proud of her. Is that not good? No. Friends in the front row. No, that's good. Should I not be in the front? We don't like people we know in the front row. Comedians are so weird. We don't want to see people who know that. I will be. I will engage with you. Don't worry. What are you talking about? That was so nice of you. I'm bringing Raven Simone. Now this is strange. I just text, I haven't talked during probably two years. I don't know. Two days ago I texted her and I said, I really miss you. So funny. She was here yesterday. She said, tell Kim that she said, I mean, she said, tell her I said, hi. She said, oh, I love Kim. My mom loved Kim. Yeah. So, so then I had the 10 tickets. So I called them last night, Miranda and Raven. I said, come join me on Saturday. They're like within two seconds. We're in. So they're coming now. So it's, it's myself and Ty. Is this bad? Is this not good? Just a little pressure. It's so nice of you. You're so in love. The last time I saw you, you did not have this full in love vibe. You are so. You really are glowing. You are. Are you pregnant? I don't know. No. It could be all the medications too. So Shane's going with his partner. Okay. And then. What sign is your partner? He's August 20th. You don't know. You don't know. He's a Lego. He's on the cusp. He's a Leo. Kean, are you going? Kean's going and he's going. So she'll have very little clothing on. I'm just like a slave. You can borrow this. And then who else is going? Oh, our, yes, our, uh, a producer of our TV show. Michael. Michael and Brock. Okay. Raven and Miranda. Oh my God. You know what I was thinking beforehand? Houston's. It's only a mile away. No, I forgot to tell you, Jeff, they're fully booked. What? No. I eat even a party of two. It was 345 or 945. I was like, bitch, the show's at 730. Oh, I wanted to go to Houston. Who eats at 345? Nobody. No, I know that's when it's open. But then Justin told me there's a Fleming's and something else right next. Oh, I like Fleming's. So the ice house. It's a show in the 1980s. It's like these restaurants. That's how he rolls. TGIF? What about there? Yeah, chill. No, that's funny. Oh, you two got jokes. I would love a Friday's. It's not TJF anymore. Oh, it's not? It's Friday's. Is it all right? Is there still a round? Yeah. Oh, it did not know that. Where did you grow up? Where? Hold up. Ice house. If there. Ice house and passenger. I inspected our own plug. Is it sold out already? No. Wow, you bought all the tickets. No. Chris, Chris. Right there. I think I have a gift card. Ruth Chris. This is coming together. OK, Ruth Chris. But then you're going to be very full at that show. I know. It's OK. I'll have a 72 ounce steak, please. It's a small portion, right? But a small steak. Just in butter. Cook it in butter. Can't wait. Oh, so good. It's so good. It's so good, Ruth Chris. I'm a butterfly. Are there still tickets available? I'm hoping there are tickets to you that you've bought. Ice house. Ice house. Pasadena. Pasadena. This Saturday, 7.30 show Caroline Ray, Kim Whitley, and someone, our host. I have no idea right now. Our hostess? We got about that, yeah. But then you guys, are you going to Vegas together? And yes, end of the month, we will be in Vegas at Jimmy Kimmel's on the last two days, last Sunday and Monday of the month. I don't have my phone because early to the day. Here's the thing. I will tell you something, Jeff. I swear to God, we're really funny. We're really, really good at our job. We are terrible at scheduling. Often I only find out I have a show because it's on Instagram. And Kim is the same way. Is that not correct? That's exactly true. I. That is not true. I do. There was a few things. There was some notes on you, Caroline, that I read. And it's funny when you read things and you obviously, I start feeling a kinship with someone and I understand therapy, your take on therapy, which is, it is an hour of the day that someone just has to listen to you talk about yourself. Yeah, it's like I'm the guy on the date. Yes. Yeah. I very much relate to that. I had therapy yesterday. It's the best. She couldn't get a word in. Oh, can I tell you? Really? This was something. Even with this voice. The most, you know that you're obsessed with someone truly obsessed when your therapist says, if you never mention him again, I won't charge you anymore. Yeah. Can you hear who I was? Chip. Remember Chip? Anyway, she was like, I can't. I can't hear another Chip story. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. Yeah. I used to say, oh, I started to see a therapist because my family says I'm in denial, which is a total lie. And I've just convinced myself there's a friend that I see once a week, and then I lend her $220. Yeah. It's amazing. How long have you done it? Oh, forever. I'm off forever. Everybody should. Everybody should check in. Otherwise, you're not awake. You're walking around like a little robot. Yeah. Check in. Should I do it? The other thing, which I think maybe Kim can relate this to this also, I also have one child. Oh, you do? And you have compared your relationship with your daughter as she is the evil queen and you are her maid. Yes. And I feel that way. No, no. It that sounds harsh. Yes, you are. She is, I call her queen, Hormone. It's because if there's anything that she'll actually ever ask me to do, I am like thrilled. If she's like, lady, lady, Huffet, she has things. That's her name for me. And then she'll say like, her name is Ava. And we call it Ava's on because there's a package every day. And she's like, you infetch me. And then I'm like on a mission. I'm literally walking through the street in Starbucks. And the order is in my head. I'm so afraid I'm going to get it wrong because I want to please her. It's pathetic. But it's the truth. She's the love of my life. It's ridiculous. It's the same thing. How old is your daughter? Nine. Oh, you're in for a buddy. No, he's got to stop. What's her sign? She's a Scorpio. I had to have an emergency C-section because I was very high risk for having a Scorpio. Yeah. I didn't want my daughter born that good at sex and unable to forgive. Sorry. I know. She's real strong. She does not forget a damn thing. And she doesn't say sorry, so don't expect it. Here's the trick to them. Oh, that's interesting. Here's the trick. As mean as they can be, and if you'll look very closely, they have fingers and one little zapping thing. You have to tell them about scorpions in Italy. They're hyper-hypersensitive, fiercely loyal. Yes. And they will go down under the ground to the darkest place possible, and they will dwell there, but they will always come up for air, and they don't want to be like, they want you waiting at the end of it. They don't want you on the road. So if she's bummed and depressed, because they also attend to like, they're dark when they're upset. It's interesting because there are fleeting moments where she is so sweet and nurturing and caring with me. And those are the moments that I cherish to the point where, over the weekend when I was sick, she was at school and thought about me and made this. I know. See, that's it. Once they start making art for you, that's it. And then I'm done. And it's like whatever you want. Of course. You made that for me? Get better soon. Who's Monroe, the baby? Yeah. Oh, I was like, there's somebody. Even though she thinks your name is Monroe, that's what she's thinking. That's a beautiful name. Monroe is her name. Yeah. But she calls me daddy, Jeff. And then my ex daddy, Gage. But you see at the end where it says, I love you. Yes. Okay. So does she live between the two of you? Yeah. But here's, you gotta think, that's a lot to process for a kid. It's rough. And they will, no matter what, they will. So I carried around with me my bag. They'll compartmentalize and you'll be one and they'll be the other. And it's so hard when you're not with them all the time to not want to be the good parent, like the good guy. You know, it's so hard. Caroline, it's funny to say that because it's very hard for me the very first day to, transition back to punish her. Oh. Because I haven't seen her for a week, but I realize if I, and it doesn't happen often, but there's some Mondays when she comes home, she's got to immediately get a timeout for whatever reason, because it'll set the tone for the week. So if I do that, a timeout, so if she misbehaves the first day, if I do some sort of timeout, I swear to God, the next, the rest of the week is perfect. Yeah. But it's hard for me because I don't want to be in a situation where I've missed her so much for the whole week. And then here we are in this. You know, it's very tricky when you divide like that. I could never have done the one week on one week off because single parents, even though they're not single, you've got two parents and you're raising your child, but you're not doing it together as a team. Right. So you have to be mother and father, both of you, each time. Yes. It's another father, mother, father. And you want to be like, I am just that. So. Well, we're also my ex and we are not a team. So that's the problem. Right. We are parallel parenting, so we're not even working together. Well, that's very hard on the child. It is. If there's any way you could both go to therapy. This is the thing. Once you stop being together as a couple and you have a child, you're only allowed to see them through the child's eyes. That's it. You can't see your partner through how you feel about them anymore. You can only see them through that baby. And the minute that child thinks that you two don't get along, she feels like something's wrong with her. How is your daughter's relationship with her father? It's good now. Great. Yeah. It's good. I love her dad. I mean, we were not, we went through a lot of hard times. But I know, yeah, he was married to someone that I did not care for, but turns out neither did he. So thank God. Were you married? No, we were never married. How long were you together? I don't believe in marriage. I only like to see the trailer. I don't want to stay for the whole movie. It looks like a horror film. What the sign? Yeah. Yeah. When we met each other, we were both engaged. Yes, that's right. And we're both trying to get out of the relationships. And we didn't want to hurt their feelings. It was. And then she caught her boyfriend cheating. Do you remember that? Yes, of course. I remember. Oh, it's such a good story. It's such a good story. Wait, I don't know about this story. Oh, I'm I spy. How any spy is not female? It's demented. How did you suspect or why did you suspect initially? That's a good question. I would say because he was hoping. Well, there was that. Please let him be cheating. I was like, because I know we hadn't had relations. So he had to be trying to have relations somewhere. And he said he was going to Vegas with his boys for the weekend. I was like, I've never gone to Vegas with your boys before. So I talked to my brother and my brother was like, you know, there's this spy where you can put on the computer and you can see his emails. And so we did. My brother took control of my computer while he was gone on his computer. And we put some stuff on there and it showed. I've never done that since, but it showed all his emails. And I printed all the emails up and I knew when the girl was flying in. They were really going to a hotel down the street. It was a mess. I feel bad and I felt bad and I tried to call the girl and I was like, come back. I'm sorry, because I knew I was not into him. And why should I deprive him of having a rendezvous? Because it was so much fun when you caught him. It was fun. That's a problem. That's the problem. There's some real joy in being able to spy on someone. It gets to be fun. It was dramatic. And it's wrong. It's wrong. I mean, you were vindicated, right? Something that you had suspected. Yes. And you were correct. I was correct and then I felt bad. But not everybody gets confirmation. Right? You got a confirmation he was cheating. Yes, I did. You caught him. You had the paperwork. That's really rewarding. You're right. It is. It was rewarding. It's terrible, but it's such an, you know what it is? When you are so obsessed with somebody like that cheating, you're so bored in the relationship. You're like, well, this is seems fun and dramatic. And heightened and I care. But now you're just. No, and then I was, I was, I think you get mad because you're like, how you got to be smarter than that. Come on. I know. You know, I had a camera and a tissue box. I had a lot of stuff going on. I was doing too much. I was way doing too much. It was too easy, right? It was. You caught him too easily. Yes. You kind of wanted more of a challenge. I wanted more of a challenge. I wanted him to get away with it. At least I did not want you. And then I felt bad because he's not that guy. He's not the cheating kind of guy. He just, that happened. And then when I look back on it, I was like, he was a cheating kind of guy. He cheated. Not really. He was a cancer. He was trying someone in. But he had to. Now we, oh my god. I was not giving him anything. Then he should have broken up with you. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Don't give him an excuse. We were deep in. We were not deep in and that was the problem. You're not even at all. Where was he staying? Bested. We were living together. No. Which hotel? Oh, the snow. No, this was here in North Hollywood where they film all those movies. No, so it was like. The Sahara that one that you always see in all the movies. You have to love it. That's a motel. And it's like a body. It's a body. It's a motel. They rent by the hour. I guess so. I felt so bad. Does it have a pool in the middle and all this? Tell them what happened when you busted them. Which part? Well, didn't the woman like freak out? No, no, I didn't see them doing it, but she freaked out because I remember I was chasing him Oh, that's right. In the car. Oh my God. And I only want to say this because I don't want kids to do that. I was riding down the street. Yeah, and my girlfriend was like, let me out the car. You're driving too fast. Pull over. Let me out the car. You're crazy. Because I thought I was in a movie. I thought I was in a movie. How long have you guys been dating? Oh, we had been together a couple years. A long time. Yeah. And he really was engaged. What a scream. We installed telephone wires across rural Britain over a century ago, and you're still paying to use them for your broadband today. If it ain't broke, what? Stop. Your days of selling phone age broadband are over. Blast. I've spilled the beans. Upgrade to 100% full fiber. Gigaclear, faster broadband for rural Britain from only 19 pounds a month. Price may rise during contract. T's and C's apply. Check availability at gigaclear.com. 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Do you know what a chump is, Karen? No, but I know what chud is, right? Is it chud? I know what a chump. What's the word? A chump is a whore. What do you mean? Like, ah, chumped? He's a chump. Sorry, wrong word. So, unfortunately, we had a very angry, a celebrity's husband was angry about the things that we spoke about on this show. He started texting me. He called me chump. He called the people on this show a chump. We are now, we basically have adopted that name. So, we are considered chumps. Our listeners are considered chumps. You are now an honorary chump, Caroline Ray. Thank you very much. Yes, you're welcome. Okay. What about Kim? This guy was born in the 60s. That name, that word. Kim is a chump because this is your third visit here. Oh, I'm a chump. So, you now qualify for the chump events. So, tonight we have a chump mixer. There's over 50 chumps, all basically co-hosts. There's 50 chumps attending tonight and you are invited and you are invited. How lovely. What, where is chump night? I'll tell you off the air. It's very close to our homes. Okay. So, it's a real quick, it's big city, a lot of homes there, Caroline. Big city, a lot of homes. You know, big off-course, you know, there's a lot of things there. So, no one's going to find out where you live. That's so funny. A lot of celebrities live where we live. Right, by the golf course. Okay. Big celebrities. More close to largemont, you know, depending on what your preference is. Have you been to Max and Helen's yet? I have not. Is that where that party was over the weekend? Yes. What party? I want to go over there. There's a series like something. Oh, there? There, a brunch. On Saturday, it was a brunch. It is, Phil Rosenthal's daughter, Lily, is running it with her husband. That's right. I got a space in. That's right. I'm telling you, there is a maple butter involved in their homemade waffle that I realized that the line to get in is two or three weeks, but it is totally worth it. You have to go. I've been, so I've owned several homes in Hancock Park because I flip houses. That's right. And I think I know your home. Stop it! No, I'm just going to say. Oh my gosh. It's beautiful. Thank you. Okay. It's beautiful. Stop talking about my home. I'm not going to say the street. I'm not going to say the cross streets. I'm not going to say the address. I saw a fridge the other day. But you lived in Hancock Park several times. Yes, but I saw a fridge. I had romantic feelings when I saw this fridge. It was, how do you feel about, since you're a home flipper, how do you feel about a glass front fridge? I love them. I love them. Oh, horrible. Don't you dare get one. Really? You're not organizing them. You know what? Just because you want. Absolutely. Actually, hindsight. Oh my God. She's not organized either. Why am I the one? Why are you not organized? Because you're not going to get a glass fridge. I am. Can I tell you? And I should have got one. Yeah. Yes, you are. I should have, because I also have a second kitchen. So I could have put everything. I could have put the ugly shit in the second kitchen. Yeah. That was a mistake. You know what? I bet I could change the door though. No, don't. Sub-zero. You could change the doors. Slop it out. It's sub-zero. I don't think so. You know what? I'm sorry to the listeners. Everyone is kind of talking really rich and over some of your heads. I don't understand anything about this sub-zero. I'm sorry, Kim. When we were at your estate last week, why don't we talk about your airplanes? Yes. When I was playing tennis on your estate in your walk-in closet that is actually also known as a two-bedroom apartment in New York City, Miss Fancy Pants. That's the biggest, the biggest flaw that you've ever seen. Some of these people that come on here, these rich celebrities like Kim, they feel like they need to be relatable. Because they identify as poor. Wow. Oh, is that it? Wow. It's a poor man's thinking. You're right. By the way, also Kim grew up in like the fanciest pants area of Gleason. Wow. That would talk about me, no? Her father and her uncle were famous, famous architects, like the most famous in the city. So this is not a girl from like, wrong side. I've done the hood. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, shrimp it. You know who she grew up with, right? Who her neighbor was growing up? Who? Molly Shannon. Oh. No. We grew up together. Molly. Isn't that crazy? Yeah. That was, yeah. Jennifer's coming today. Shaker heads Jennifer. Oh, really? Yeah. Hi, Jennifer. Hi, yeah. Is it true that your storage unit was sold off because you didn't pay the bill? Yeah. But it's not that I didn't pay the bill. My American Express card got stolen. So they went, oh. And it was an automatic payment on it. And so I didn't like, I was clueless at the time. Which store, New York or the one here? Which of the 2000's storage units? I don't know. Yes. With my stuff in it, I'm sure. You're, look at, you're such a bus thrower. You are exactly the same as me. Sorry. Yeah. You have your shit in her storage unit? No. Kim's. I have everything. I have her. Kim's. I've had to look to see if I have anything of hers on. I do have a purse. I have a fucking book that isn't. OK. Kim couldn't figure it out. Oh, do we tell them about the stolen purse? No, no. OK, tell them that. OK. Can we finish the storage unit first? So here's the thing. So I did not, I didn't know that, it was on an automatic payment. So it's not like I wasn't paying it. And then by the time I'd realized the card was stolen and replaced and I had not been in New York and then I came back and I, I was, and I called and they're like, we sold all your stuff out of your storage unit. Why would they not contact you? Oh my God. I don't know. I was very upset and honestly a little part of me was relieved. I gotta be honest, one storage unit down. But it had a lot of sentimental things in there. Sentimental, that's terrible. That's terrible. Like all my clothes were more stressed. Oh, because you, yeah, you definitely want to save all that. Yeah, you do. And I don't know. What about your tea cups? Oh, please. Please, nothing like that. I could leave the garage door open with like an arrow, plop yourself. And you know what? The first car I ever bought was a 1980 Chevy Chevette. I was in Minneapolis and it died on the side of the highway and I left the registration and a note that said it's yours. Wow. Yeah. So I have no problem. Yeah. Anyway, what do you collect? Anything? No. Nothing? You're in Aries? It doesn't collect? No. You collect houses and flip them. Yeah, okay. Houses, cars, people. Okay. Houses, cars and people, those are things. Okay. Aries definitely collect people. Yes. Definitely. Really? Oh. You're in a collection. No. I'm trying to collect you. Oh, I collect. Yes, I'll be collected. Especially if you keep this voice. I like this deep voice. It's sexy voice. It sounds like me in the morning. What happened to the stolen purse? Okay. I think didn't know me, but didn't know. So, Caroline is very generous. Okay. I have finally something nice about me. Okay. She just always gives, you know, people but me, every time I come over her house, I leave with clothes, jewelry, anything. Painting. Paintings, always a lot of art. But she's been like that with me, my son, and she just always gives them stuff. I come over there, I got this one time, she was really heavy designer purse. This was one time. And I took it home and I was like, oh, the heavy purse. And I looked it up and I was like, oh, this is $3,000. But it was heavy. So then I went over there maybe last year, wasn't it maybe eight months ago? No, it was a couple years ago now. A couple years ago. I had no idea. She gave me another kind of heavy purse. I had like metal on it or something. But I never used it. I'm telling you, three weeks ago, my niece is like, oh, let me dress you. She's like, oh, this purse will be fly. You know, she's young. Take this purse with it. And I was like, oh, that's the purse Caroline gave me. It's cute. OK. And then I go continue to get dressed. And she was like, Caroline gave you a Gucci? This is when you old. I never saw the word Gucci because it was small. And I went back over. I said, that is a Gucci. And I went in the little zipper part because it was brand new. And the little zipper part had the paperwork and everything. I was like, she gave me a Gucci. I was like, she loves me. OK. Parallel universe. Three weeks ago, I'm like, where is the Gucci purse? I bought my sister. I cannot believe I cannot find this purse. It's driving me crazy. I got her this Gucci purse. She saw it. And then she left it here. And I've got to give it to her. Where is it? OK. Complete panic. Then cut to Kim says. Hey, girl, I can't believe you know the other night I grabbed the purse that you gave me. You have my Gucci purse. I know. No, I didn't mean to give you that. I was like, you gave it to them. No, you said, did you just take it? I said, I didn't take your purse. You gave me the purse. I just didn't see it said Gucci because I'd have my glasses on. Oh, let me tell you. The other day I come in, she's rifling through a drawer. She's like, these are things that I would like. I go, it's a Tiffany necklace. You can't have that. You weren't yours. You didn't even. I know. I wasn't. And then I felt bad that I didn't give it to you. But that's OK. I went and got my Pandora and put it on. To show you that I have my glasses on. So you had to return the Gucci so that way she could give it to her sister. Yes. I shined it up. Yes. I took all the little crumbs of food out of it. Did you wear it that night, though, at least? Oh, yes. OK, good. I got pictures of me in the Gucci. And it was, I couldn't believe it. I was like, I got a, wow. It's a new Gucci bag. And she was, but this was in front of friends at her house. I remember, I was like, friends. I was like, I had your bag and I couldn't believe it was a Gucci. Thank you. She was like, that's my sister's bag. I found out everyone else. Only black person in the house for miles. And by the way, am I the only white person in your house for miles? Yes. OK, we didn't have to bring that up. OK, exactly. I do have a statue of David. And he has a tiny penis. Very bad representation. Very bad. Well, no, it's about actress. OK, sorry. What purse did she mean to give you, the Michael Kors? What did you mean to give me? I've given her so many purses. It's like, we are like the sisterhood of the traveling pants. We fit in the exact same clothes, no matter. It's one of those things, no matter. We could both be pregnant and be wearing the exact same clothes. But she did give me a black and white purse and a purse that I have today, an orange one. She just went in her closet because she felt so bad. And she grabbed two purses. She was like, here, take these. So you're a shopper. Whoa, Caroline. Whoa. Excuse me. Whoa. I think Kim's having some kind of a seizure. I don't know. I don't know what the whoa sound means. Jeff, this right here is the underwear drawer in Kim's closet. OK? No, I'm not. I'm a collector, not a shopper. Let's talk about your furniture obsession. Why is she doing this to me? I'm not a shopper. I'm an antique, a designer. You know what? I think you get, I don't know. A curator. A curator. Thank you. Yes. I don't, I have a tiny closet now. I used to have a big one. Yeah, but you're about to get it. You, I mean, you need to fix it. How many tea cups do you own? Who? I heard that you collect tea cups. I didn't say it. Why did you suddenly get to sexy law and order cross examiner voice, Jeff? I understand you have tea cups. Do you want to talk about the tea cups? And maybe that's what you used to kill the gardener with? You know what? When did it start? I'm so glad you asked this question. My mother was an antique dealer, and when my mother died, I was so devastated. I literally cried for two years straight. And suddenly I went into an antique store. Yes. And I was like, like Patrick Swayze in ghost. My mother went into my body and started picking tea cups because she collected them. And then all of a sudden I looked around and I was like, I don't even like these. What's wrong? And then my mother's like, shut up bitch. We're collecting now. Because that is the obsession. And I love the, this is my dream is that one day to have like a big open tea house where because strangers don't talk to each other anymore. And everybody's like in this epidemic of like loneliness in the country. So if you could sit down and across from a stranger, but you're both having a cup of tea, you could like start chatting. So I like that idea. She's Canadian. Man. You're very deep. Thank you. Okay, but how many? Aries are deep. We're deep. But we want to know how many. Oh, literally probably a thousand. But they're gorgeous. But it doesn't still listen to sound. I've had a good tea party. It still sounds like though that Kim has a lot more panties than you have tea cups. So I just meant in terms of like what she has, she has a lot of love. Love, Annie's camera. She could, no, she could get dressed in a bedazzled gown for the rest of her life. A different one and change twice a day. That's because my style is not because of me. You know what kind of shopper I am? Yeah. She's been trying. I am a regular, you put me in a drugstore. Woo. Oh my God. I lose my mind. The trinkets and the little things and the gadgets. I love gadgets and all those things. I'm actually, I'm going to start. I have a channel I'm going to start. It's going to be Kim's. It's the Gadget Girl. Let's hit plus. Yes. Yes. Yes. Kim, where are you this month? I am at Jimmy Kimmel Live actually with you. I'm there every Sunday and Monday and then I will be. In January. In January. Thank you. And then we'll be there together on the 25th and 26th if you're in Vegas. And I'll also be at the punchline in Sacramento. And that is January 30th and 31st. And me and you will be at the ice house this Saturday, January 17th. And Pasadena, California, 730. Boom. You can also purchase Caroline Special right now called I Identify As A Witch on veeps.com, V-E-E-P-S dot com for 11.99. You have to go to veeps.com slash Caroline Ray. I know it's 11.99 and I feel bad, but I produced it myself and I think it's really very entertaining. It's very funny. My producer, Kean, the other Aries, he loved it. Oh good. And I talked about that I met Taylor Swift. And that's why she has on the. But the ice house is very important because we're going to be there. So there better be, I think we should sell every single seat. 100%. So it's the ice house in Pasadena. Which is a great club. And it's this Saturday. And then. But Jeff, it's also, Kim is brilliant comedian. I'm a pretty brilliant comedian I think. But then Kim and I do stuff together that most comedians don't do together. We have a shtick that we do together too. I'm excited about it. And Kean was just telling me, because we were cross streaming. And he was telling me that we need to have you both back again. I didn't realize how close you were. You did? No, I knew you were working together, but I didn't realize this was like this long term. Oh no, the best friend can tell you like that. And I know Sherry Shepard thinks she's her best friend, but she's not. I know they're best friends. Whatever. Look at you. Sherry, no, Sherry's gotten our talk show and you know, she's sprouting on. And I, are you dating? Because I heard that a lot of younger men are interested in you, Caroline. No, I thought that younger men are interested in me. It's that, well, first of all, you know you're old when the younger man you're dating is old. Why? Why? Why? You're like in your 40s. This is not like robbing the cradle. You're not young. I remember turning, my mother was so hilarious and she said, I was turning 40 and I was having a complete nervous breakdown. And I was talking around the phone and I was sobbing. And I go, I'm already 40 in Australia. It's just a matter of hours until it happens here. And my mother goes, darling, it's not like 39 is young. What's the problem? Yeah, your mother, that was your mother. Yeah. Oh my God. Oh, Jeff, you would have loved my mother. She was the funniest in the whole wide world. My first boyfriend was gay and I didn't know he was gay. And he didn't know he was gay, but my mother knew that he was gay. And his name was Gary. Name with you. And one day when he came. Over to practice our disco moves, which he let me lead, clue number one. Because I went to all girl's school. It's the only thing I knew how to do was lead. And my mother said, darling, Gary is here. And darling, I think the R is silent. And I still was like, guy, why? I didn't, I still didn't get it. She was a doctor was. No, my dad was a doctor. But you know what? My mother could have been a doctor. She was so smart. She's so smart. Well, Kim Whitley, Caroline Ray, it is such a pleasure. Thank you so much for being here. We haven't finished channelizing your book. You're right. Are you kicking us out? Is it over? It's over. Again, the show is over. You've got to be kidding me. How to get the same everything. Please come back. All right. Feel better, friend. Thanks for listening. If you want more of this, listen to Jeff Lewis Lodd every weekday on Sirius XM, as well as the Jeff Lewis channel, exclusively on the Sirius XM app. Verify best network at EE.caddy.cash claims.