Our biggest travel blunders, commitment issues, & hacks for traveling with kids

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I feel like people that have anxiety do it a lot. Oh, I should do that. Welcome back to Always Tear. We're your hosts, Abby Howard and Abby Howard. Yeah. Hello, hello, hello. Honestly, it feels like it feels good to be back in the chair. Yeah. The last two times we filmed, we were on the couches, which you won't see these in order, but it feels like it feels good to be back. That dynamic threw me off. I know. Those are first time having this. It was really fun, but this feels comfortable. More natural. Yes. I know. Even like, just when do you speak? When do you jump in? Like, I almost, I'm listening back to the moms episode now and they sound so sweet and good, which I realized during both of those, I'm very protective over like what my mom said and what Caleb said. I'm like, I'm going to protect them. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Which I know you guys will be gracious, but I wish listening back that I like chimed in and hyped my mom up more, you know, just kind of chimed in more. I think we were, I was just listening. Yeah. You know, there are always things that you leave feeling like I wish I said this or I wish I said that, but I hate that. I know. That's why it was the first time it's hard to listen to things back. Like, I know. I'm miserable to listen to. Totally. But also it's been good. It's my own constructive feedback. I'm like, okay, I'm new to this. So let's listen to it and learn and improve hopefully. But yeah, it's so fun. Do we say that we're here to share the hope and the heart with heart and humor? Hey, we're here to share the hope and the heart with heart and humor. And that's what we're going to do right now. Yes. What's been going on? What's your hope? My hope. I actually just did this recent Instagram series falling back in love with my closet. And you look good. Thanks. Thanks. It's been fun. It's been a fun series. I just, I'm sure a lot of women can relate to that feeling of like your body just goes through so many changes within the last year and a half of pregnancy, postpartum, or even if it's not that, even if I had messages from girls being like, this has helped me in recovering from an eating disorder and just like really amazing messages. And there are so many times in your womanhood where your body's going to change and you're adjusting. And it's this fear of rejection of my own clothes where it's like, oh, when I'm just going through the day, I feel good or I feel like a look in the mirror and I see myself a certain way. But then I go to my closet and I try on my clothes and then I'm just kind of put back down where I'm like, oh, I actually don't fit into these things. Like I thought, or they don't look, they don't look on me how I pictured that they would or that they did. And then it's this, this cycle of constantly having to get back to like, oh, I actually am content or like, you know, get your baseline of your self-esteem and your clothes. My lace was always moving. So yeah, I was seven months postpartum. Like it's time for me to, I just kind of stopped trying on stuff. I was like, I'm just going to wear what I know fits right now. But now I'm kind of at this point where, okay, things are starting to like fit back. So I've just been scared to try things on and get rejected again. So this series was kind of like a rip in the bandaid off and try and have fun with my closet again and not just throwing everything out and donating it all and just starting fresh, but like, let's see, let's work and let's have fun again. I definitely threw everything out. Yeah. I remember when you threw all your maternity stuff away through that. Got rid of, I didn't throw it away. I donated it to a woman's shelter area. But then I also like, like all the, everything I wore in Hawaii gone. Matt like pulls things up. He's like, where did this go? I was like, that's, I can't look at that. Yeah. That freaking yellow bikini. The amount of time Matt, yeah. He's like, why'd you ever get rid of this? I was like, because I can't get my right cheek in that. Right. I'm like, because I don't want to see what I'm going to look like in that. It's true. Like there's like a fear. And I even remember like when I had gotten, like I don't weigh myself too often. Whenever I had gotten to back to what I would like perceive as like, oh, okay. Like this is where I wanted to be. I still remember trying on my clothes and be like, things just don't look the same. Right. Like my whole body was proportion differently. Right. And it still is. Like, I mean, obviously now I'm pregnant again, but like, I just remember being like, okay, this is just not going to look the same way. So then I was like, I just think this, these clothes are done. Totally. But I do think that I had some things I, I'm so glad I hung on to because I'm like, things are still, the dust is still settling for years on out. No, totally. That's why I feel like I was like, I want to be kind of slow about donating things in the postpartum season because even right now, like, okay, I'm not wearing a ton of color or really fun things or short dresses or, you know, some of this like fun, flirty, colorful stuff that I had before. And it just feels wrong in the season where I'm like nursing and, you know, have a baby. It just doesn't feel like my personality right now. But I know those things will come back. And it's like, I don't always have to be this like serious, only brown T-shirts girl. You know what I mean? Like the color will come back. And so I don't want to just get rid of all that stuff. So I'm trying to challenge myself to at least try it on. I did on swimsuits last night. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. It's the season. So much I was like, I genuinely don't need anyone to tell me I look good. That my I don't need that. It's not going to convince me. Like, and I'm not like insecure about it. Well, maybe I am a little bit. I'm like, I'm like the bump out. Well, it's just, I feel like your belly looks a little different after your first pregnancy, like the subsequent ones. She's already a little misshapen and things like it's just like there's a lot. And so I was like trying on new swimsuits. And I was like, wow, we're going to air this out at the pool. I was like, this is crazy. But yeah, no, it's fine. I never thought anything of it. I know. And it's things that you only notice by yourself. You know, now I got a picture for you. Oh, OK. Oh, just to know that I don't think I'm being dramatic here. I was living in my belly button became like a little witch's hat. Like it got really pointy and I got really insecure about it because I was like, I can't even look cute with the. You can't even see the bottoms most of the time. What am I looking at? Exactly. No, I don't like that. You look so cute in that. No, I do not. Yes, you do. That one did not get purchased. Really? I like the brown polka dots. Oh my gosh, my boobs look like Animal Planet. I didn't even look at your boobs. Good. I was like, I didn't need more support. No, it was it was it's one of those things where it's like I truly do feel freedom from like that. Like I'm like, OK, that's so not what's important right now. But then sometimes I'm like, wow, we can still be realistic. We have come. Right. I'm like, these are different. Now I would never go back and I'd do it over and over again. But totally. Things are different. Totally. We can we can talk about it. It's fine. Totally. But my hope is that I feel like I'm moving into a better place. You're stylish. Yeah. I like those shorts. Thanks. They're actually maternity. I got them. My mom got them for me when I was pregnant and I never wore them when I was pregnant. I actually like them better on me now. Yeah. They're old-rocky. I feel like my belly is lower than it's ever been in other pregnancies. And when I wear things below the bump, it feels better. It feels like I'm exposing myself. Oh, yeah, you're like that is my love. It does feel way better. I don't know. We're in a tough tough position. Dresses it is dresses. But then my thighs started chafing. Yeah, you're right. What do I do? I couldn't see. I was like, is there a rush? He's like a little bit. I was like, saying. Anyway, I hope. Or do you want to do a heart? I hope is I'm really excited to go to Hawaii. Yeah. Kind of the inspiration for today's episode. But I'm really excited. I feel like I feel like we travel a lot, but this one feels like hopefully it'll be more just like restful and family focused, like then other a lot of things are like double dipping with like work things, which I'm still work while we're there, but like it'll just feel hopefully just like a really good time because it's our last trip as a family of four. Like this is the last time we're going just us. And so yeah, it'll be really special and I'm really excited. And you know what? I don't even actually feel that sentimental about like I like love our family unit of four, but I think we've just been so ready to add someone else to the family that I'm like not sentimental about it. But I am like excited to just like celebrate the last raw like me and two boys, two actually three boys. Right. And then it'll be four boys. Right. What do you mean? Okay. Matt. Oh, I thought you were just like manifesting another boy. I know. I do have strong feelings. I'm having another boy after this. Yeah. Wow. Put that over there. Put it on the internet. We'll clock in a couple of years. I do have strong feelings about that. But because like I don't know why, like when I see moms with like all boys, I'm like, hmm, and Mrs. Glimps in my future. Hey, my mom had three girls and then a boy. I know it happens. It does. It does happen. It does happen. I don't know why I have that feeling, but no problem. My heart, though, is at my stomach hurts. Your stomach hurts. Why? Um, I don't know. I think it's going to be two things. I think digestive issues related to the. No, the other way. Oh, yeah. Sorry about that. Stomach aches and just like just upset stomach to the point where I'm like, what's going on? Like it's just, but then I'm also like it could be stress induced. Right. That could be a. Are you feeling anxious? I am. But I don't want to talk about it because I feel like I always talk about that and my life is so good and I'm so grateful, but I'm just like, just like with work, just overwhelm of everything or just specific things. No, yeah, just everything, everything. Yeah. I mean, yeah. Well, here's the day before you're leaving for a trip. That's the most stressful day of the year. Yeah, there's just a lot to be done. So much to do. And it'll all get done. But are you the time? I don't know why the day before I leave for vacation, I am doing everything that I've been putting off for months. I'm like, I'm going to the post office. I'm returning everything that used to be all my returns. Like things that aren't actually pressing, but for some reason I'm gone for three days, I need to do it. It's like the day you check everything off your list and it's the most stressful day and you're up to like 1 a.m. For no reason, at least I am. I wish. I have so many things. I feel like I'm actually just doing the things I need to like actually need to do. Okay. So that's that's actually efficiency. But there's a lot of other things that just will never get done because of that. Like I need to get my kids and unification records from their pediatrician and I'm like, when will that ever happen? For their like, oh, for school. For school. Interesting. And they will not email it to me. I know a lot of pediatricians will or they could do it on their portal, but they will not. So that's actually my own personal information that actually seems like old school. Kind of far. And the lady. Yeah. Anyway, anyway, that's hard. Who's going to make it there? That'll happen. Hey, my heart is that I got attacked by a bird twice. Wait, two separate occasions. Yeah. So the way. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The next day went back, but here's the thing. Let me tell you my mistake. Here's what I did. Okay. I was on a walk in my neighborhood. That is hard. I know. Fool me once. Shame on me. Fool. Wait, shame on you. Feel me twice. Shame on me. Yeah. So the first time I was on a walk and I'm walking my dog and I noticed this bird kind of out of my peripheral vision and I'm like, Oh, that bird was kind of low. And then I hear this, I feel this like hit on my back and I'm like, dang, was that my ponytail? And I'm like, no, my hair's not that long. And then I go, Oh, maybe that bird's like learning to fly. I don't know why that was my thought. I turn around. This bird is dive bombing me coming back at me again. And I go, and I sprinted across the street with my dog. That's so scary. It was. And it kind of followed me across the street. Like, I was like, it's not leaving me alone. So Lewis and I kind of ran a little bit and it left me alone after that. I was like, whoa, that's crazy. There must be a nest or something. So the next day, this is stupid. The next day I'm going to walk again and I, in my head, I'm like, okay, wherever that tree was, I'm going to cross the street earlier to avoid the bird. I'm not going to go past that tree. So I am good kind of walking and I noticed the bird that looks like the bird that tagged me the day before on the fence right next to me. And it's kind of following me along the fence line, but I'm way early. I'm like way ahead of the tree. I'm not in your territory. I'm not in the territory. So then I start crossing the street. The bird comes at me. Again, it's the height bombing me. And I'm like flinging my arms as Lewis. I'm like, ah, there are witnesses. I want to go in there. Our witness, this guy in a truck tried past me and he goes, you roll this window down and goes, ha, ha, ha, laughed at my face and goes, it almost got you. And I was like, surely did. And then the guy on his driveway said, yeah, that nest is like in my yard. And I'm like, I said, yeah, but the birds not attacking you. He says, yeah. OK, so just me. Got a dog, maybe. Maybe it is the dog. The dog. The dog. Lewis. Yeah. So, you know what? You thought I would learn the first time. That's freaky. Yeah. It's an aggressive mom. Mom. She's a mom of birth. She said, don't come near my children. You've got to find a whole new route. I do. Those babies hatch. I know. I went to the hatch. How long does it take? Like two weeks? I don't know. There was a dead bird out of a tree today. Oh, and they fall out. Yeah, it's sad. It was sad. One time, Sophie and I, my sister saw a bird that had fallen out. And we took it to the vet, like ran it to the vet. And I don't know if I made it or not, but that was pretty stupid. It was to the vet? Like we ran it to an emergency bed. And we're like, this bird was just on the ground. Sweet. Couldn't fly. Yeah. Sad. Sad. Circle of life, you know. Hopefully they did something. Yeah. My sweet fourth grade teacher took a dwarf hamster to the vet to like give it life saving measures. Life saving. I hope they saved that hamster. I think they did. What happened to it? The cage. She had so many classroom pets. I feel like this is back in the day when you could have classroom pets. Yeah, yeah. They didn't let you do that anymore. Because of allergies. No, probably not. They were, the crates were stacked. And we, like you, my friends would clean out their crates at recess sometimes. Cute. And one of my good friends accidentally, like when she was reaching out, we were in fourth grade, we were really short. Letting you reach for these cages. And that little hamster was like stunned for a while, but he was still alive. Not smushed, but like maybe paralyzed. Yeah. Ooh. My friends closed the hamster in her door. Yeah, there's there's there's so many. So many hamster stories. Well, rodents never have a good end. No, they don't. Except for my hamster Maggie. Who is it? We brought a hamster. She lived six years. Whoa. What is with the longevity of your pets? Apparently I take really good care of that. Wow. My older sister brought home a classroom pet, a hamster. It got out in our home. No, it always happens. And we have cats. So I know we were nervous. Good thing my dad works for a company that makes fiber optic things. He just had some night vision goggles at work. What? So we brought them in there like he rated. So he found the hamster. Oh, my God. Everybody let's just wait till it gets dark. Wait, what is that? I have honey. I shrunk the kids when he's leaning above the grass. He's like got the glasses. He's like going through every blade of grass. I love that movie. That just unlocked a memory. I forgot about that movie. It was seen the other day. I was like, I need to watch and now I can't think of it. OK, OK. No, I don't know. I don't know either. But let it let it come on back. I was also just thinking our new like, wow, that's crazy. That like that saying that we all are saying is surely. Surely. Like, did I start? Matt's made fun of me for saying she. Caitlin started it. Really? I think Caitlin says it all the time. We got it from her. I think we got it from Caitlin. I could see that. She's got some fun like verbiage and things that we definitely pick up on. Matt has made fun of me for years for saying that though. Really? He's like, is it S-H-I-R-L-E-Y or S-U-R? Because I say surely. Surely. It's surely with a bunch of use. Yes. That's the good West in us. Surely. Surely. The movie I really want to watch is remember the classic and it's not the classic because it's the new one, but in my mind, it's a classic. The hairspray with Zach Efron and John Travines. That is such a good movie. That is a good movie. It came up on my Spotify, a song from that because I've been playing Annie because Griffin's been obsessed with Annie ever. He always sings tomorrow now. Because since I took it, he's like tomorrow. And then all you sing is it do because Griffin taught it to him. And anyway, that came on next and I was like, that movie was so good. I need to watch that again. I loved the song Amanda Bynes did. The dog of the chocolate. The sweet. Yes. There we go. Yes. Run and tell them that. I forgot that was her. Yeah. Yeah, that's probably the last thing she. Yeah, that or E.D.A. I think was one of the last movies. Oh, OK. I was such a. I saw that movie in theaters. Anyway, let's bring that movie back. Yes, that's a good idea. Thank you to Magic Spoon for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. Magic Spoon just figured out how to turn treats into something you can actually feel good about eating. If you love sweet snacks like I do, but you hate the sugar crash, this is about to be your new obsession. Magic Spoon treats are crispy, airy, protein packed snack bars. They have 12 grams of protein, 7 grams of fibers, your grams of added sugar, 2 to 3 grams net carbs and our certified gluten free. Those macros are crazy. OK, these bars are so good. 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You can get $5 off your next order, including the protein pastries at magicspoon.com slash abbey. That's magicspoon.com slash abbey for $5 off. Now that's crazy. That's crazy. Now we need to high babblegill up for this week. OK. Well, here's the thing. OK, the cra- we're talking about polyamory. Can we just preference on here? And it says let abbey go loose. Let abbey go loose. Go Abby. Go Abby. Go Abby. Go Abby. I'm not going to say anything of heat, but I just think it's an interesting topic, polyamory. I've listened to two interviews recently where with different people where it's massive interviews, where it's been brought up of like open relationships, open marriages. And the comment section was a little surprising to me both times and just the sentiment around open marriage, open dating relationships. So I was like, this is like a really interesting topic of conversation. And I know like within recent reality TV, like it's going to be a big topic coming up here like throuples and all these things. So I just feel like I had a lot of things come to mind like this is an interesting topic. Let me stop dancing around it. No, seriously, first of all, actually someone literally asked me yesterday. They're like, what's the difference between polygamy and polyamory? I don't think much to be honest. Is it marriage? Well, polygamy is one man, many wives. Yes. I kind of Googled this before we were talking about it. Polyamory is just an open relationship. So like the man and woman can have extra affairs. Okay. And I feel like polygamy is usually associated with not consent. Right. And also like child brides. Yeah, I would agree. But also I think that's like a big thing to me is that I feel like it's the same thing, just a different font. Like you're telling me that when it's polygamy and it's a man with many wives, it's illegal and wrong and bad. But with polyamory, we're just going to change the name and say, oh, the women can do it too. If she wants, but the man's still going to go out and like, just to me, I'm like, it's the same thing, just kind of different. And I feel like one is really obviously for good reason, like polygamy is wrong and bad. And so it's for good reason. Like talked about negatively, but just the sentiment around these open marriages, you read the comments and it's like, Oh, how beautiful. So many loving people in one situation. And both of these people that I heard these women that were in these interviews talking about this are like strong feminist women. And I was very confused by them then being in open relationships and open marriages. Because to me, I couldn't think of anything more patriarchal than an open marriage or like letting your husband or your boyfriend go out and sleep with other women. I just literally can't think of anything more. Like, like the power dynamic there is so weird. The manipulation that comes into play with that is so weird. And it just made me really mad. I was like, this just doesn't make actually any sense with what you're saying. Like you're the one girl was not going to go out and have extra affairs, but she wanted her boyfriend too. And she got turned on by it. Which she did. Yeah. I was like, wow. So that's just, I mean, she said it was weird, but I'm like, but that is, I'm like, okay, but the empower balance there is so interesting. And I think too, it's like, you're to be fully known is to be fully loved. And so if you're saying, Hey, husband or boyfriend, you can pick these things about me that you like. And then the other things that I can't give you, you can go get from someone else. Shop elsewhere, shop elsewhere to pick and choose what you want from me and then go get other things from other ladies. Like that is so disrespectful to yourself. Like you are enough. And like that is the point of a relationship is to be fully chosen and chosen every day to be loved and served and cared for. You know? And so I don't know, just this idea of it is really, it's just really taken me off. Yeah. And I think it's, it's wild that how far reaching the relevance is because before this even became like in those circles, like, mm-hmm. The circles I listened to, like callers have called into John Delaney that have been a part of relationships, like marriages like this for years. And a lot of times I would say almost every time it's a woman calling being like, I want to close our open relationship. Right. But like, how do I do that after this has been like our marriage for the past 10 years? Yeah. And it's so hard. Yeah. I mean, I don't know how you could, that feels nearly impossible at that point. Right. You know, like I just can't, like it's just not, I shouldn't say impossible, but that feels like, yeah, I don't know how you do that. You have to start a whole new everything. Really build everything up from the bottom because that's totally, and I'm going to be so frank. I haven't, this isn't just these two people I'm talking about. Like I was, I got on polygamy. Tick tock. I don't know how I got on that side. No polyamory. No, I know by gone polygamy. And it wasn't like FLDS. It was like, like business CEOs, like corporate guys with two, you know, they're not legally married, but like, and they call themselves polygamists. It's like becoming more of a thing in culture. And because of social media, I feel like it's just becoming more known before it kind of hit in the dark. Right. And that's what it was like, we are probably shouldn't be doing this, but we, we are doing it. Right. And now it's like, no, let's make it normal and beautiful. And people in the comments love it. They're like, this is so amazing. You all get what you need. And that's the part to me where I'm like, every adult, consenting adult has the right to make whatever decisions they want with their life. But then when it's like young people seeing this and even just people that are like curious about this stuff being influenced a certain way, I'm like, sure, yeah, you can make your own decisions, but also like, you should make your decision fully informed. And I think it's the job of people to tell you that that's not healthy or right or good in the longterm, maybe in the short term, it feels good. I feel like there are a lot of things that are not good that like work in the short term, but longterm, it's just like, I can't imagine. A world in which that relationship is fulfilling and satisfying and loving. If like, you're not fully chosen every day. Do you know what I mean? Am I so offbeat? I could be offbeat, but like, I think that the counter argument that I hear often for a number of different things like this is like, well, no one's getting hurt or no one, like they're like, everyone is agreeing and everyone's happy with arrangement. The thing that I think about is how many eyes now are open to this, like being a very posse, like as being like an option that are being influenced by it. Like I'm thinking about like, I mean, think about how many middle schoolers and high schoolers are on social media and that therefore we know the influence that has on shifting like cultural trends and totally like lifestyle ideals. And I think when the narrative is so one sided, that's where it gets dangerous. Right. And so yeah, it's always in a positive way. Everyone is allowed, like you said, free will. Do whatever you want to do. Share whatever you want to share. Right. When it feels scary to share the other side of it, you're not getting an honest representation. I can speak to like amazing benefits of monogamy. Right. Right. Long term. But you seem like the odd one out to say that. Like it's like we're being controversial to be like, we actually love monogamy. Right. Like why are we scared to talk about this? That it's that is like the taboo and maybe not the best way. And I think it's just, yeah, it's like, okay, we don't want to ruffle feathers or like stuff in people's toes. But also when we do have a platform and it's like, talking about some of these things that are big, it's like, I don't know, it's just a shift in culture that I had noticed this and I was like, dang, I think there's so many. You made a really interesting point too in connecting like the implications of this on like the feminist movement too. Yeah. I just am so. And this is a real contest. Yeah. Like I am a very classical feminist. Like I want girls to have their fully equal value and wanted them to do everything that a man can do if they want. Yeah. I think it's just this is more so a conversation of like, you just deserve the best and you deserve better and like you deserve to be felt like you're enough. And sometimes I feel like there is this level of protection that women, they tell themselves like all these lies and it's like, well, if you can't get it from me, then go get it from someone else, but like still come home to me at the end of the day. And like, that's just not, that's not the point of a relationship. The point of a relationship isn't just to fulfill your sexual desires. The point of a relationship is to like walk hand in hand with someone and like experience life. And when crap hits the fan, you know that you are like with this person. And when you say and think and do horrible, ugly things and that person sees those things in you, they still choose to love you because they know that you are valuable and enough just in that. And I just feel like the, like the dynamic in some of these, the sentiment of like open marriage is just that there's, you're not being chosen. I don't know. Like we can exercise self control. Well said. Yeah. Arthur Brooks said he was like denying yourself, like from every impulse that you feel is what separates us from like an iguana or like from an animal. From like animals. Yeah. And he's like, we have this part of our brain that other animals don't have. It's like your prefront. I mean, do I do other animals have prefrontal cortexes? I want to say no, because that's their decision making. And I feel like animals are just like on survival. And he was like, basically that's what separates you from an animal is the ability to tell yourself no. And I feel like that is, I mean, it's a discipline is a good thing. It's not like, and restraint, but yeah, it's not popular. It's not trendy. Right. It's not going to make any splashy headlines. Right. But I do think they'll get you the farthest probably. And probably who knows. Hey, I've never been in a threple. Me neither. I never will be. Never. I mean, confidently say I'll never be. Yeah, I mean, yeah, that would be being cheated on. And yeah, like actually that would be me. The whole different conversations. Looking, contacting a lawyer. Wait a minute. The this is not. Be messy. That would be really messy. Yeah. I'm going to think about any more thoughts on this because I feel like I've had so many thoughts last two weeks. I was trying to like condense them into a list. But yeah. I just like, oh, for women, I'm like, just demand more. Yeah, you should demand more. Yeah. And that's commitment. Okay. That's commitment. And that's all I got. Well, polyamory is a great topic. Ready to sound off. I'm ready for the I'm ready for this to reach the wrong side of the internet and you can come for me and guess what? I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I thought you're about to try and segment it. They're like, I was going to segue it, but I have to say that. My fears, Sam, is that when people are playing by different rules, I always say this and people play by different rules. I'm like, I'm afraid to enter that game because I have my own rule book of how I operate in like a public space, how I operate in a private space. When people have a different rule books, I'm kind of like, yeah, you're good. You're willing to go lower than I'll go. And so therefore that's just a humbling place to be. Okay. Well, how was I going to segue that? So polyamory. Wow. Wait, so there are many partners. We've been to many places. Why is it a bit now? It was like, it was an advice of like, you guys need to segue better. Now it's like, how are we going to make this connect? We're talking about travel. Moving it. Moving over here. Okay. Let's get a little bit off the hot seat. How about that? Something a little safer. My stomach's hurting worse. I feel relieved. I feel relieved. Our group chat was popping off the other night. Yeah, it was. I was glad I was able to talk to you guys about this. I just feel really happy to be in the know about things. Oh yeah. That's crazy. I was like, wow, that's crazy. Thank you to Omaha Steaks for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. I'm not going to lie to you guys. I used to buy the thickest, heartiest chicken breast you could ever find. Like these things were definitely loaded up with all the antibiotics, just not the best meat that I could find. I've had a change of heart because Omaha Steaks has completely changed the way that I experience and eat meat. Omaha Steaks delivered right to my door and I was just immediately overcome by these amazing, juicy, tender steaks chicken. And I mean, the quality spoke for itself. Omaha Steaks has been perfecting the art of premium protein for over 100 years with zero compromises from mouthwatering burgers, chicken, pork, seafood, dessert and more for a great dinner just minutes away. We had their burgers for like a little grill out and they are so lean, but still juicy and tender. I also just created made steak for the first time with my Omaha Steaks filet cut and it was unreal. And I didn't mess it up. I was really proud of myself. Delicious, juicy steaks taste the Omaha Steaks difference and never settle for grocery proteins again, get flavorful, high quality proteins delivered by visiting Omaha Steaks.com plus $35 off when you use promo code abbey at checkout. That's Omaha Steaks.com code abbey terms apply. Seaside for details. Okay. And know what's crazy is that we are leaving tomorrow for Hawaii six hours on a plane and I'm not stressed about traveling with my kids, right? Which I couldn't say was the fact for probably about two years of my life. Sure. The hardest time to travel with kids, I will say is right where you're entering. I'm going on a flight in a month, nine months to 18 months. Agree, Abby. The hardest ages. Hard. That's a hard year. Honestly, at that point, I don't have a lot of hacks for you, but I will try my best. I was actually going to take notes this time. No, no, no, you can, you can follow these, but then the, the, then you just pray. Yeah. But we definitely had some horror stories before we got to the, this place of more comfort course. This doesn't mean that we can't be knocked on our butt again. Right. No, no. And that's the thing about parenting that you just have to really just accept. Right. They'll, they'll humble you at any given time. It's actually never comfortable. Right. Of course. And so, um, unfortunately I am a little comfortable, but we all have had our horror stories with kids and traveling and you know what? You make it, everyone survives. And that's what you just have to remember when it starts getting rough. We're going to get there and we're going to be glad we did this. And if we're not, we're never going to do this again. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. And so we asked you guys, what were some of your horror stories when it comes to traveling and Kaylee is a Kasey. Kaylee Kasey. That's cute. Said grade eight sailing trip got my second ever period and was not prepared. No. You're school on a sailing trip? Yeah. Wait a minute. Realism. Well, she's saying grade eight, so not America. Oh, we say. Oh, Addy, you're so right. Oh my gosh. Thank you, Kaylee. If you're an international listener, please follow up. We should do a whole segment on period stories because I have some. I would love to talk about my dude. I never, I never tracked mine for like a long time. Okay. And I was always surprised. Let's do, let's do, let's add that to the list. Okay. I'm actually, I have a whole, I'm in a whole new world of the flex desk. So. Oh, yes. We can have a whole episode about period. Yes, yes, yes. Yes, ladies. Yes. Okay. Mimi McNulty said the guy next to me took his shoes and socks off on a nine hour flight and it smelled like farts and eggs. Do you guys take your shoes off on the airplane? No. I untied my laces. Take my shoes off. I do too. I always have socks. Always have socks. Socks stay on. Oh my goodness. Never without socks. Now it's kind of game changing because I used to never wear sandals to the airport because you had to take your shoes off and I was like, I don't want to be walking barefoot on the airport floor. But now you get to keep your shoes on. Oh, so that's kind of nice. I think I still just don't like to walk in sandals that much. Yeah, I don't. It's long distance. Give me 10 shoes for travel days. I agree. I agree, Addy. Yeah. I, yeah, socks off is nine hour flight. Alexa said she took a laxative traveling internationally. Why would you do that? Only toilet was whole with no door at train station. Oh, with no door just exploding. Not on a travel day. Oh my gosh. Oh, Kelly best says a drunk man fell next to us on a plane and peed all over his seat. Oh, she said on our honeymoon. On our honeymoon. What is it with? Sometimes I think it's funny. I, a lot of people order alcohol from the like little cart on the plane. I just think that's so funny. Yeah. I'm like, you want that little, I don't know. I feel like people that have anxiety do it a lot. Oh, I should do that. Just the edge of my flight. Yeah, really bad. Really? Yes. She talked to your therapist about that. I cried on the way to LA. Why? I, it's one of those things that doesn't hit me until I'm in the air. And then I'm like, only hit turbulence. Oh, like it's not like it's, and then I, and unfortunately I feel like I'm in a plane a lot. Yeah. And then I'm like, why is this getting so much worse? Matt's like, it's, he's like, it's getting, yeah. I'm like, I know it's really bad if we're without the kids. Like if we had, we had to go to LA without like for literally less than 24 hours. And we were not with the kids and we hit some bad turbulence between, it's a less than an one hour flight. The flight attendant fell down. Wow. So I'm like not trying to be dramatic. It was like bad. She fell down. He fell down with a tray of drinks and like, dang. Yeah. And so then they put on the red emergency light. The captain started talking to us and he was so sweet. And he was like, there's nothing to worry about. Anyway, I was like sure that we were crashing. Really? Yeah. Does it have to do with being pregnant? Have they gotten worse being pregnant? Yeah. So the first time I felt flight anxiety was my pride was pregnant with Gryffind. Yeah. And then it's just continued to get worse. Yeah. My stakes are too high if I die. Yeah. I get that when I'm with the kids aren't with me and it's just me and Caleb. I do get anxious. Yeah. And I don't like it when I'm with the kids, but it's way, way worse. At least they're not alone. Yeah. So I told Matt, I was like, I might need to get knocked out. I will die together. Exactly. Why is that so dark? And like that just shows where my head's going though. Yeah. Maybe you can talk to your doctor about getting like some just Xanax or something for a plane. I'm not even kidding. I do that. I literally will because it's actually not when I'm pregnant, but like yeah. Or I'm going to get pregnant again. So about five years I'll take care of this. No one's going to think about so many things. I'll get boobs. I'll take care of my anxiety. Later on. Okay. Wow. Moving right along. Don't worry about me. Lucy says our baggage, including our costumes, didn't turn up for a dance competition. That would be so stressful. I have a theory about that, but we'll go. I think you need to share the theory. The theory is one of my hacks. Oh, okay. We'll eat them. Okay. Olivia said I have a fear of flying, so it's always a horror story. Relatable. Literally. Why? I hate this about myself. I love traveling. Yeah. This is just inhibiting me. Just a single tear down my cheek and other people are sleeping. I knew she was at we when we were flying home from Rhode Island. Abby was reading her book and then she closes it. I close it because I can't read when it's really bad. And I was like, oh, no, I'm sorry. She's just like, I'm safe. Everything's. I'm like, did it make you feel more anxious that the girl next to us was very anxious and then got off the plane? Oh, I was just so glad that she wasn't there because I was like, girl, do it for me. Yeah. I get off the plane for me. I am the opposite. I fall asleep. I'm like, oh, me immediately. That white noise. I fall asleep when it's smooth. But then as soon as it gets bumpy, I'm like, like I'm Matt tried to move up my arm rest to put his arm on my leg. And I was like, I need that. I needed to grip it. I don't wake up unless it like jostles my head. You know, there is one time where I was sleeping with my head, my head back and then the bump hit and my head flew forward and I woke up and I was like, whoa. Yesterday, Blake showed me a picture on the plane with Brie. Oh, she's on me and I'm asleep. Oh, yeah. I dream. Yeah, baby happened. Tay Lepper said overnight bus in Thailand had to share a bed with a mom and her three kids. Oh, not your mom. A mom and her three kids. That's that's trooper status, girl. That is intense travel status. I've never even heard of that happening. Only in Thailand, maybe. Maybe. Alina, Mary says was bored on a flight, tried to do a handstand in the airplane bathroom door flung open. Don't get crazy. And I look like. Just go to the bathroom. Just go to the bathroom and get out. I'm sorry. Are you really short because there's no way I could even get my hands on the floor and that other things to entertain you on a flight. West journey going upside down, putting your feet where all the men's pee is. Oh my gosh, that's hilarious. OK, I bet your flight attendant was like, this is she needs to be arrested. This is why I hate my job. Amanda said a tour bus caught fire on the only bridge in and out of the Florida Keys standstill traffic for three plus hours. Oh, man. Everyone was OK. That feels like a never ending situation. And then you're like, well, I didn't prepare for this. I'm starting stranded on a long boat with no food, no water, limited gas. Got to pee. What do you do? They're on a boat. I'm sorry. Car. Yeah. The car, because you could run a gas. Right. Just turn off your car and have a party outside. Maggie Nay says I puked a blue slushie outside the window of the car, but it was a cop behind and I got a ticket. What? Why didn't give you a ticket? It just mean he said I'm going to kick her while she's down. It's not illegal. Yeah, what? So it's just rude. Amy said, forgot. Forgot everyone's underwear. Dot, dot, dot. Walmart run. I'm sure I've done that, honestly. Walmart delivery goes a lot of places. Is that one of your hacks? No, that would. Well, part of one of mine. Yeah. OK, perfect. Walmart delivery is great. Perfect. Sarah Johansson. Hanneson. I accidentally bought two one-way tickets to NYC instead of a round trip. Oh. No, I think that's the way to do it. No, she bought them both one way, two New York, no back, no ticket back. But yes, that is one of your hacks. That is that hack that I didn't write down. Yeah. Only by single leg of the journey. Agreed. Tickets. Agreed. I never buy a round trip. The only airline that it benefits you on is Allegiant. You get a discount. Every other airline, there's no discount for round trips. Agreed. Agreed. That's a great hack. And it just makes it so much more messy if anything has to change with your travel plan. Absolutely. My husband and I went on our honeymoon not knowing there was an age requirement. Oh my. Yeah, that happened to us. There was an age requirement of 25 plus. We were 22 at the time and had to sleep in our car the night of our wedding. Dro from Georgia to Florida the night of our wedding to get on a cruise the next day. That happens. It happened to us in Chicago. I actually think that might have happened to us too, but somehow we got around it. Blake and I were 18. We had to be 21. So we had to find a hotel that would let 18-year-olds. Oh my gosh. Discrimination. I booked the hotel, but I couldn't get in my room. You couldn't pay for it. Yep. Don't let me. Straight out of Chicago. They act like it's for safety, but I'm like, if you're both adults. 18, yeah. If you're both around the same age, you're both young. Children. Oh, they're thinking of trafficking stuff. I... Well, I don't know because they probably want to be the person being trafficked probably is the one booking the hotel. That's so true. It was weird. I had to assume there was always a hoopla thing, like keep the kids and the parties out. I don't know. Maybe we should Google that. Why is that a rule? That's what they told us. They said for safety. It's fairly to avoid legally unenforceable contracts with minors manage liability for its potential underage drinking in rooms with mini bars and reduce risk of property damage. Oh. Just get the alcohol out. That makes sense. No, that makes a lot of sense. After we get married, we were driving to a new country and my father-in-law was also flying in for a few days. He went ahead and we spontaneously, he went on ahead and we spontaneously sent a suitcase with him, which was really helpful. Just that inside the suitcase was my passport. The amount of times I've done stuff like that is just the most stomach sinking feeling. What did I just do? I hate that. Oh my gosh. I was given the wrong room key and keyed into a couple's room. One word nakedness. She was given the wrong room key. Oh. That's a new fear unlocked. So bad on the hotel. That's so bad. Guys, I went to Disney researching hotels every day. I got lost in the last hotel because it was literally a maze. The Grand Californian is a maze and I was one digit off, but it was the middle digit. So I was nowhere near where I was supposed to be. But I, first of all, I had sent Matt there already one time. He's knocking on it. And then in my head, I still hadn't corrected that that was not our room number. I'm knocking and I'm trying to use my key. I'm like, why is my key not working? Still not thinking. How would you not at this point when your key is not working? And then knocking and then the moment I realized it, I was like, oh crap. Someone's opening the door and I just ran. I was like, this is a little pregnant girl just running on the hallway. It was a housekeeper. That's happened twice to me where someone tried to get in my room. Matt, you're such a child. Yeah, literally. I was like, I was scared. I didn't want to get in trouble. I always felt like such an amateur. And I was like, I just can't face my problems. I know. It just feels so awkward. Like walking into someone in the bathroom and you're like, oh, sorry, gotta run. Don't look at my face. Thank you Shopify for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. I personally used Shopify for five years when I owned my small clothing business and it was truly a game changer in running and starting a small business. Starting something new isn't just hard. It's terrifying to be honest. And it can be hard to make that leap of faith. But it also helps when you have a partner like Shopify on your side to help. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world. I loved that Shopify had so many plugins. It was compatible with so many different sites. It just was so seamless to grow and customize my business and my shop, which I think really sets Shopify apart. You can get started with your own design studio with hundreds of ready to use templates. Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store that matches your brand style. They have tons of free and paid templates that you can choose from so you can really customize your store to make it feel exactly as your brand is. Tackle all those important tasks in one place from inventory to payments to analytics and more. There's no need to save multiple websites or try to figure out what platform is hosting the tool that you need. Everything is all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. I just want to say that again, it makes your life easier and your business operations smoother. It truly does. It is time to turn those what ifs into with Shopify today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at Shopify.com slash abbey. Go to Shopify.com slash abbey. That's Shopify.com slash abbey. Transitioning from travel nightmares, learning from experience. We have probably adopted some travel hacks that we do differently now. A lot of mine I have learned from failure. Let me take the fall on it and let me pass on to you. Please when it comes to booking your travel from the very get go set yourself up for success. Book in the morning. I know I've talked about that before on this podcast, but the morning is just it safeguards you against any type of delays or cancellations. You can read. You can adjust way easier. Sometimes like if it's a nighttime fight, that's your last fight out of the day. What are you going to do then? Right? You got to hold to like all these other things. It's just such a mess. Also kids are fresher and you can't really bank on naps. You can't bank on them being any kind of sane state of mind later on in the day. Start them off fresh. If that means you have to wake them up really early in the morning, do that over like a 7 p.m. flight. That's so spooky. They get overly tired and they can't fall asleep. Bad news. My kids don't sleep on the go. That's on me. I guess. I don't know. And also when you're booking them, book direct whenever possible. Yeah. I do not do it. I know that it's tempting to save money. There's other ways to save money when you travel. You will also safeguards you against cancellations, delays. Just having an airport nightmare with children is 10x scarier. And you're also just going to end up spending more money anyway when you have to get food at the next airport because it's so expensive at airports and you're not going to save what you think you're going to save. Just get it direct. Yeah. Just get it direct. Yep. I agree. Direct flights always if you can. Okay. This is actually, I don't do this anymore, but this was a really good hack that Kilvine did when we were going on her honeymoon. And so if you're like trying to find, this is a budget travel hack. Okay. We looked for cheap flights on skip lagged, which I know here there's a caveat. You cannot refund your ticket. You have to be so sure that you're going to be taking this flight. Okay. So you have no friends, no frills, no nothing, but I got extremely cheap international flights when Kilvine were booking her honeymoon. There are some caveats. You have, do not ever book a hidden city. Our mother-in-law made that mistake. That's basically like, and they're telling you, Hey, you're going to go to Phoenix, the St. Louis. You have a layover in Phoenix. That's what the whole point of skip lagged is though. You know what I mean? No, that's not. That's what skip lagging is. That's called a hidden city. I use skip lag for a long, I use it a long time ago and they never, the first time I ever got offered that was this past year. No, they've had that. Really? Yeah. The hidden city thing? Yeah, I think so. Yeah. That's what skip lagging is. Okay. So our... Yeah, because skip lagging is the practice of booking a flight with a layover at your intended destination. So you get off. That's what skip lagging is. Really? So you get off at a layover rather than booking a direct flight to that city in order to secure a cheaper airfare. That's why it's cheaper. Weird. Really? But I never did that. I just used a divide cheaper airfare. I didn't even know that was my thing. That's what skip lagging is though. Interesting. Okay, so don't do that. Don't do that because yeah, you'll get in trouble with the airlines. So basically if it's like, hey, we're going to go to St. Louis to Phoenix. They're like, hey, book this flight to Washington, but it has a layover in Phoenix. You'll get off of Phoenix. Don't do that. That's bad. You'll get in trouble. But Caleb and I got extremely cheap tickets on skip lag to international travel and the trick is if you go on the website, don't move your mouse. It'll show you the original flight and then as you're longer on the website, the price continues to go down. It's very interesting. So if you're looking for like the cheapest possible flight, wait, say this hack again. Okay, you go on skip lags.com and you go and you type in your cities that you want to go to. What do you mean move your mouse? Like don't touch your computer mouse. You don't touch it. Don't click nothing and just watch the price drop. It's like a game. I'm not kidding. It'll show you the original price first and they think, okay, you'll see the high price. You'll click on it and they'll try to get you to buy the more expensive ticket. But if you stop and you wait, it drops down and then it shows you the cheaper price. Maybe it shouldn't be around. How'd you figure that out? Caleb did. I don't know. So okay, so there's that, but also Google flights is much easier and less sketchy and you know, I like Google flight. I'm like, sheesh. I think that's like an actual hack. You know what I mean? It's like a sneaky thing that people don't normally do. Skip lag thing. Does it work on mobile? I would do it on desktop. Wow. That is crazy. I don't know. Like what is this hack? Google flights is another one that is amazing to help you find like cheap budget flights and you can go by the day, like move your mouse along the days of the week and you can find the cheapest days. That's how I actually pick a lot of times when we go on our trips. I'm like, okay, when I want to go to this city, when's the cheapest time to go? And it shows you the whole year of the cheapest days. So yeah, there you go. I never would have thought of that. I don't do it anymore. And now like flying with kids and stuff is just too, I'm like, I want like a safer ticket. But when it was just me and Caleb and we're just bootstrapping, backpacking it up. Why not just take a cheap, easy flight? Who cares? Wow. Yeah. Test that hack out. Let us know if it works for you. That's a legit hack. Okay. This one is not going to sound that secretive. Okay. But it's, my other hack is check everything you can. Yes. I had that on my list. And I mean like do this to like the nth degree because with kids, hands are just so precious. Absolutely. I'm actually going to the extent of don't even buy a coffee at the airport. You need that hand more than you need the coffee. I swear to you, every time I've done this before, like when I would do it before I would get a coffee and I'm like, this is just a stressor. I need this hand more than I need this coffee. So like don't get coffee. Don't just keep your hands as free as possible. And I also, with this hack, I want to tell you everything that you can take with kids on any airline for free because you're traveling with kids. You can check car seats for free. Check those. Don't carry those through. No, check it out. I see people rolling their kids in their car seats and I was like, oh my gosh, just check it. Check it at the front. Don't check it at the gate. No. Check it at the counter at the front. Yep. You can also get free diaper bags. This is an addition to your personal item. So you can check a breast pump for free. Not, okay, sorry. Don't check your diaper bag. Take your diaper bag with you. You can bring that an addition for free. You can also check strollers. I recommend checking these at the gate. If you're traveling with kids, you can take them through the airport. So the first thing you're going to check at the counter, car seats, carry the stroller with you through the airport, through security, get to your gate. Check that at your gate counter. Yep. That is for free as well. You cannot check a pack in place for free. So if you're going to bring a pack in place, that's going to be a checked other bag. I would just strongly advise you to find a pack in place at your destination and bring your own sheet for it because it's kind of gross sometimes. You never know what they're going to write. Yeah, especially Airbnb's. I literally went to an Airbnb and they're like, we have a pack in place. I checked in advance. There was blood all over the pack in place. And I was like, so glad I brought my own sheet and I flipped it over. I was like, that is, it was dried, but gross. And your breast pumpkin also doesn't count as your personal item. It's a medical device. So yeah, those were things that I didn't know when I was early on traveling with kids. But your hands are your most prized possession in the airport. I had one like that written down. I said, carry on one bag. That's it. Check everything else. So I even combined my diaper bag and my carry on personal. I'm not my kids can carry their own backpacks. I like let them have their own personal. I'm cute, so cute, but it's small. Something that you don't end up having to carry. No. And I always tell them, I'm like, if you're bringing that backpack, you're carrying that. I need my hands. Exactly. Also, with the coffee you're like sitting in your seat, it's just going to get spilled, flown around, especially with a baby. You can't do that. It's not worth it. No. Well, that was and I take coffee seriously. So yeah, yeah, yeah. You should know that. Okay. That was my that was my second one. I'll just skip to my third one. This I also did this and actually my mom and I were talking about this. This is the hack she does as well. She did this for us as kids. I did this as an adult, um, planning my outfits in advance and I would roll them up and put them in his uplock bag. So all my outfits are sectioned out and my mom did that for all of our kids, too. She's like, it was so easy. Then you have all of your outfits, you know, exactly who's to you. Write the name on the bag and you just throw it in their rooms, in the drawers, whatever you go. So just the clothes aren't getting intermixed, getting messed up. And I loved it when we did international travel because it just made like I didn't over pack and I didn't have to think so much about my outfits. So the day I'd already thought about it. So then I was like, oh, shower change, really fast. Get ready, go out to dinner. It wasn't all this extra time thinking about my outfit. It was already planned. And then also it was just way easier to pack it all. My mom did that with me and Blake and my brother. And she'd have the date even on it. Oh, for like the day of the trip. And we would match. Oh, that's really cute. And then we would always like when we got older, we would fight her on it because we wanted our own suitcase. Of course. And she's like, no, this is for the first half of the trip. And this for the second half trip. We're like, no. Oh, yeah. But no, that's a really good hack. Yeah. Pack those clothes up tightly. I don't give myself enough time in advance of packing to do that. But I will strive for that one day. OK, this one is another one for kids. And I just I gave myself this freedom. So I just want to if this gives you permission to give yourself this freedom as well, more power to you. I just say unlimited screen time on travel days. Oh, yeah. So like we're traveling tomorrow all day. My kids will not have any screens today. We're they know that they are going to have so much tomorrow that we just don't need to have any today. But I feel like there's a lot of pressure to think of all these ways to entertain kids on flights. And that's just more stuff to pack. And also, it's not going to be as effective usually as a good old show. And I will I am packing other activities because it's not going to. I don't want them to only do that. And I don't want that to think. But if they're entertained, I'm not going to be like, you're timers up. I like they're entertained. We're going to just ride with it. And so my advice is to bring headphones because there's been a lot of times with kids where I'm like, freak, they only have like those corded headphones and a lot of flights don't have TVs. And we've played it out loud, like quietly and they have come and told us. Yes, they turn it off. Yes. And I'm like, do you know what we're doing here? And I'm like, so then and then they're not nearly as entertained if they can't hear it well. And so bring headphones, bring the headphones that have Bluetooth and also have a cord in case you're on a flight that like does have a TV or you bring a portable DVD player or some other thing that has that kind of jack, though. Yeah. Oh, I guess. Yeah, there's some cords too that can go into like iPads and stuff. Yeah. I would also say that DJ, I had a list of toys that are fun for planes for kids to get. I'll say something about the screen time the next day, playing an outdoor activity, because when your kids have so much green time, like with CJ, I'm like, OK, the next day, really so squirrelly because you're on you're like on a plane. All day, once you make it to your destination, it's like fun time. They're not on shows. No. So the next day, just play an outdoor activity where they can get all that pent up energy out. Yeah. We don't really watch shows. And we're I can't think of a time either. Yeah. No. So it's like just on your travel days, allow that freedom for yourself. If you feel so inclined. Yeah. Here are my fun toys for these are these are what works for my boys. These little magnet guys, they're on it. I'll actually put links all these on Amazon. These are so dumb. Oh, I don't know. They're these little magnet guys. They have magnets on their hands and on their feet, but everything on the plane is like magnetic. So you can connect them to each other and connect them to like their the tray table in front of them. Their seats. My kids think they're really fun. OK, also, this is for kids that don't like to color because if your kids like to color, bring coloring things for heaven's sake. Yeah, it sounds like a great option. Robot suction cup toys. What? Same idea as the magnet guys, but they if you get a window seat, they suction to the window, their arms and their legs and they stretch out their arms and legs. I think they're really fun. Those water art things. Those are good. You can just get a little cup of water or pour some from your water bottle or whatever. They'll also bring an empty water bottle and bring your own water on the planes. That would be what I I always that's as soon as you get through security, fill up your water. Yeah. And they love those. They dry quickly and then they can do it again. And it's no mess. And you literally just bring that little notebook and the little water thing. If you don't want to talk about, you know, if you don't find the links, so you don't talk about it, you just use water and colors. Yeah, it's cute. Last thing is. Oh, stickers are really good on planes. They are really good. Get the puffy ones. They're not actually really hard to pick off. And recently flashcards have been really good for like Griffin. He is so into dinosaurs and so flashcards really. Because he's like, well, it really studies them like he wants to know. And they're more easy to travel with. And yeah, fun. I would this is something that CJ loves cars and he's always loved cars. And so I was like, I'll bring his favorite cars in the plane. Don't bring anything with wheels. They will lose them because they fall down the floor and then they roll down the length of the plane. Oh, yeah. And you're like, sorry, buddy, your favorite. All day. Bye. Bye. Don't do cars. I had some of these. I had a hard time at you like with a nine months to an 18 month old. The activities are so different because they can't do stickers. They can't do they're not entertained by screens. So I think I just always remembered like getting CJ up and just walking down the aisles and I would just take him to the back and like the airplane area and just stand by the bathroom. Stand by the bathroom. Real would enjoy like those busy books, you know, where there's just like things you can like she's so like doesn't need to be entertained. Like if there's just something in her hands, like she's entertained. Totally. Snacks. She loves. Oh, gosh. She's been a big old thing of pubs. Yeah, she's going to eat a mountain. That's really good. I mean, those are a lot of good, a lot of good trips. Also like the little mini magnet tiles. Those are cute. The mini magnet tiles are great. Really great. Yeah. Anything magnet. I bet Brielle would love that. That's my list. I'm adding that now. Yeah, that was a really good one. Those are really good. OK, this is another one. This is for like parents. You need to have enough diapers, formula, snacks and food for a emergency travel day. So don't just put you have that on that's my next one. Don't just pack enough for like your pl, a lot of plane time. Pack enough where it's like if there's a delay, if there's something you're going to have, like I would pack maybe four bottles of formula for one flight, even if it's like a, you know, you have your bottle going up and your bottle going down, I'd pack two extra things of formula for just in case you get delayed because you don't want to be delayed in an airport. No formula like that'd be scary. So if that applies to you, that's that. But when you get there, deliver all your goods to the house. My diapers at the destination. Buy your diapers, your big old cans of formula if you need it, your snacks, your food, anything extra, even like your shampoo and conditioner. I sometimes will add that in the delivery. Anything that you just don't pack it. We're going on a cruise in July. So it's like buy everything, get a delivery, dot it on. Like I have to pack it. I have to pack seven days plus worth of formula. I have to pack seven days plus worth of diapers. I'm like, do I pack it here? Do I get it in Florida? No, just don't want to pack it here, pack it here and just pay for an extra bag and just have one bag of stuff. Literally just baby. Baby items. Totally. Seriously. That's like the one travel exception. I'm like, dang. That's all my family does is cruises. I'm like, we don't go to a destination. And then if I go home, my mom just gets everything I need. Yeah, same. It is nice when I go home. I don't have to bring anything. Yeah, that was my number four was buy diapers at your destination. They take up a lot of luggage space and then you might not have. It's really hard to figure how many you're going to need. And then you might end up having to buy a pack anyway. And then you're like, oh, traveling. No, not extra. Yeah. Yeah. My other hack with kids is that I just find we have so much more success if we get an Airbnb than like a hotel room. Now this was specific when you have multiples and specific. If one of those multiples is a baby, I think we're in a different place now where we're all going to share a hotel room and it's like totally fine. But before when everyone has different sleep, need sleep schedules, it's really nice to have a little bit more space to spread out, but also a kitchen where you can like get groceries delivered. Walmart plus, I love Walmart delivery like so much. They're everywhere and they don't charge you more if you like are in a new location. And so get it sent there, get their milk, like whatever they need, like just sent to your place. It's just also helps you feel like a lot more stable. I don't know what kids and traveling it can feel like with when it's just you and your spouse. Like it's just like, yeah, we'll sleep on a couch and it's like no big deal. But I felt like having like more of a place to go that felt like a home base. Yeah, you can wash the bottles, wash the toys, wash, you know what I mean? Wash the clothes in a sink if you need to. Not scrammed in a hotel room. You have more chance of there being a bathtub too. I remember that being an issue with the babies. I don't like showering with my baby. Either I felt like it was so dangerous. They were like a little wet pig. I was like, I'm going to drop you. I sit on the floor. Oh my gosh. Yeah, which felt gross on my butt. But I'm like, you know, here we go. He do what you guys do. Yeah, that can shower with them. But for me, I just was like, I'm so scary. Yeah, sitting down is good. Yeah. But that would be like a lot of hotels only have showers. Whereas that Airbnb is a house. There's usually at least one tub. Right, totally. It's a good hack. You get four pairs of shoes, Max. Oh, I was going to say two Max. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, shoot. Maybe the smell is to get this one. For kids or for adults? Oh, for adults it's a little different. One closed toad, one open toad. Yeah, kids get one closed, one open. Me as an adult, I get one nice night dress shoe. Yes. That all my night outfits go with. I get my workout tennis shoes. I'm going to wear on the plane and I get a casual day shoe, which might be like a walking tennis shoe or like a fashion day shoe. And then maybe a flip-flop. So you got three. I don't have to like daily. That's just sandal. See, yeah, like, OK, we're a little more fashionable than I am. You know what? I just if you're walking around the city and stuff and you're wearing like a cute outfit during the day, I'm not going to wear my hoca and I'm not going to wear my like heel for night out. So you get like a casual, comfy walking day shoe, but you don't get like a different shoe for every night outfit. And my mom even goes so far as to say, put those shoes in your carry on. Don't put them in your check bag. Then you can put all the clothes you want in your carry on, but she doesn't have children so that her carry on looks very different than mine. See, I don't even do a carry on anymore. I need my hands. Yeah, but she would put them in her backpack, like her personal item. Oh, wow. Yeah. That inventory is a little too valuable right now. I know, I know. So we're going to go carry on this conversation just a little bit longer on our Patreon. Thank you to those that have subscribed to that. That's really exciting and have joined that community over there. It already feels like just like a fun addition where we can, you know, dig a little deeper, feel a little freer. So we'll carry this on and then we'll be right back. This portion of today's episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. May is Mental Health Awareness Month and a time to open up the conversation, break down the stigma and prioritize taking care of our mental well-being just as much as our physical health. It's also a reminder that you don't have to go through anything alone because with today's sponsor, BetterHelp, there's someone who's always with you, someone who's trained to listen, which is so important. Everyone in their life at some point is going to go through hard things or have to learn how to manage hard things. When Caleb and I first got married, we went to therapy for a little while and it was just really helpful to have a third party unbiased opinion and have them give insight into what was going on in our lives at the time. BetterHelp makes therapy accessible wherever you are, whether online or through the app. It can be really hard to go in person sometimes and find a good therapist in person. You work, you're busy. The online access that BetterHelp creates is really a game changer. Take the quiz and get matched with the licensed therapist quickly and you can switch anytime at no extra cost if it's not the right fit. 82% of clients actually recommend their therapist, which is a really high success rate. So go ahead and click the link in the description or go to betterhelp.com slash always to get 10% off your first month of therapy because no one should have to go through anything alone. BetterHelp is here with you. Ask, ask, ask Abby. Okay, we're back and we are ready to listen to you guys because we've done enough talking. We really have. And so let's go to our voicemails. If you guys also want to call in, it's a really fun thing that we've done since the very beginning here. You can call 602-456-9690 and leave a voicemail for us and we will listen to it live on the podcast and then answer it, respond to it, whatever it may be. The flow is yours. Hi friends. My name is Maddie. I was just calling because I am just dying to know what you guys would make for girl dinner. For example, mine is usually a wrist cracker or like a handful of wrist crackers with some cheese on top of them and some like chocolate chips on the side and maybe a cheese stick if I'm really feeling cheesy. So I would love to know what you guys make when you're just like, what do I got? I'm hungry. Anyway, thanks for your podcast. Bye bye. You're good at this. Yeah, Maddie. I'm with you girl. My girl dinner is just a boiled noodle with pesto and just smothered in Parmesan cheese. Yeah, that's my girl dinner. That's actually similar to the dinner my mom would make us growing up. It was like late night. Yeah, she would just bowl some pasta and we wouldn't put butter on it. We would just put Parmesan cheese. Oh, just plain noodles with a little parm. Super dry. We loved it. It still hits every time. So yeah, it's noodles. I do, I jazz it up, make it a little more fancy with some pesto. I'm sorry. I like man dinners. I only eat man dinners. Like I need a big protein. I need big portions. I need there to be a lot of protein and I can't. I'm sorry. I don't want big protein. I want big carb. I'm too hungry. Get a big car. But it's just. Hungry. I really don't think if you gave me, I don't know how much noodles I would have to eat to get full out of go. I'm not kidding. It's scary. Yeah, I'm going to eat a lot of it. I do enjoy everybody. I'm sorry. I'm a man dinner, but I can talk about my favorite snacks. Give us a good snack. And I'm going to have a snack. I will have a chopstick. Oh my gosh, you may not. Protein. A cheese stick or a baby belt cheese. And then I've been really liking the Catalina Crunch protein mix from Costco. Maybe a fruit, maybe a dried mango for feeling crazy. Fruit. I eat a fruit on my girl dinner. That's not my girl snack. And it's still a platter. It's a snack platter. A platter. A healthy snack platter. My girl snack, maybe be like some yogurt. Yeah, yogurt. I saw someone the other day that said, I genuinely don't believe anyone actually likes yogurt. Oh, I love yogurt. I feel that. Really? I love yogurt. Because I'm like, I should eat it. I'm not like craving yogurt ever. You need more toppings. You need the different yogurt. I do. I do granola. Chocolate granola. No, you need to get the little cashew, chocolate, almond, trail mix, and Trader Joe's. Sweeten your yogurt too. You just need to put some chocolate in there. I get vanilla. Oh, okay. You just need to put some chocolate in it. It's good. It doesn't taste bad. It's not like, I'm not like, I'm going to have yogurt every single morning because it's so yummy. Yeah. This is my girl snack. Sorry to change the subject. No, you're going to. You're right, Addy. Yeah, it's ranch dip in some potato chips. That's my girl snack. Yeah. Wavy, wavy potato chips. Potato chips. Okay. Wavy potato chips with the ranch dip seasoning packet and full fat sour cream. See, I got a different one. I got a different. That's making me excited. Wavy potato chips name brand. Lays. Oh, Lays. Lays. And the Highland, is that the brand? Sour cream and onion dip that they don't sell here. Unfortunately, they don't sell in Arizona. And in this part of the country. Highland. We're calling you out. Yeah. I can't buy that. I would eat. My grandma brings it every time we go. And she brings like double bags and a bunch of, because all the kids we just, Blake's like, Addy, you gotta stop. I don't get it back home. I know, literally. Or the French onion dip is also really good. Oh, that's what I thought we were talking about. Oh, sorry. I meant to say French onion dip. Did you mean French onion dip? I meant French onion dip. Yeah, okay. Sorry. Okay, that's, it is better than sour cream and onion. I was going to hype you up. No, no, no, no. French onion dip. Oh my gosh, it's so good. Oh man, my mouth is watering for that. Okay. Who wants to make it on her after this? I was thinking about something and I just lost it. Hey, we should make that green dip again. That was good. That was so good. And it like just an after pod. Yeah, we should have your mom make us after pod. Snack every week. Mom, make me a snack. Hi, Abby, Abby and Addy. My name is Andy. I am a new mom to a four week old baby girl and I have loved listening to your guys' show in both pregnancy and postpartum. And I wanted to ask you guys, what is one quality about yourselves and one quality in your spouse that you hope your children have? Thanks guys. Love listening to you. Bye. I hear the baby. That's really sweet. Yeah, congratulations on your baby. From Caleb, I really want our kids to get his brain. I love the way that his brain works. He's so curious. He's a great question asker. He's like the way that he breaks down a, he's a problem solver. It's just so impressive to me. I love watching a work through solution. So I hope our kids get that. And for me, I hope they get, oh my gosh, this feels like weird to say. I think I appreciate that I'm not like a high anxiety, high anxious person. And I appreciate by myself that I'm going with the flow. So I hope my kids can take that. Like I'm particularly thinking about like things rolling off their backs. Like I don't want them to like take things so personally or get stressed out about little situations. Yeah, I think that's, yeah. Gosh, this is so deep actually. I know. I was like, oh, this is another thing deeply about this. I really hope that they get Matt's friendliness. I feel like Matt is just like a, like he's a golden retriever. He's, we'll talk to anybody and like he was so good at like, he's a good recruiter of like, I even think about in high school, just like the types of people he would be friends with. And maybe like people looking out for people that didn't have friends. I hope that my kids would do that too. Sweet. For me, gosh, I think the scariest thing is like, I'm like, I hope you don't get that. I don't know. I don't know. I'm like, let's see. I hope that they're like this and I don't know that I hope that I can be like work on this too more so, but also just like be very like selfless and generous. Like go out of their way for other people because I just think the world needs more of that. Totally. You're a good example of that. You're self uncomfortable for other people and that's just something that isn't popular, but I do think it's needed. Look out for your neighbor. Yeah. I was going to say kind of along the same lines, Blake, I love for her to get, he's like brain in the way that he thinks through and processes things and just like really wants to learn because I don't think I'm necessarily in that same boat. So I really love that he just really wants to understand. It's not like, oh, that's a fact. Cool. He like wants to understand why that, how that happened to become that way. So I think that's really cool. And then for me, I think kind of going off your lines of friendliness. I'm just like the more outgoing side of me. I love Blake, but I hope Braille doesn't get the introverted side. I want her to be extroverted. If she is, I'll still love her, but I hope she's more extroverted and is like having good friends, but I'm like just spends a lot of time with people. I did hear the advice. I hear a lot of moms say like, are you shy or they're shy and like labeling kids too early with like being shy. I don't know why that's like something we're so comfortable with like not that being shy is a bad thing, but they're hearing that and it also can just like, like it's scary as a kid to be around adults and to try everything is new. And like we can expect there to be some caution or like trepidation. You need to label it as shy. And so I feel like someone said like, don't say, don't ask, like label your kid as shy in front of them. That's good. And I think that's good advice. That's good. And I feel like you and Blake are like the perfect, you guys are like the perfect balance. Yeah, I would be like, we're kind of like opposites, but we go all together. Hi Abby, I just love your show. My question for you is what is your go to freezer meals to take to your friends? I have a friend who's finishing chemo for their brain cancer this week and I'd love to stock their freezer. So please give me some good suggestions other than Los Anga. Thanks so much. I've actually never brought a freezer meal, but my friends after we were after we had Vivian, they brought soup in a big, big pot and put it in my freezer and it was the best. It was a chicken chili, which froze really well. I wouldn't do anything with noodles. I would say something that has like a bean, more of a chili vibe was really good. And I just threw it in our fridge for a couple of days when I knew we wanted it in advance and it thought out and it was delicious. I'd say frozen breakfast burritos. No one thinks about breakfast when you post part of them. And those are so good because you also don't have to like do this long following session. They're individual and you just go straight from the freezer to the microwave. I linked that on the last one. So revisit the last episode. I think that's like the best thing. And I've made that for friends. Yeah. OK, fine. You guys, thank you guys so much for leaving a voicemail. And are we going to do Always Hungry? Yeah, that was a great transition from voicemails. And now Always Hungry, we love to share our recipes with you guys. What we're making this week. And yeah, you have a good recipe you like to share. I just have been reintroduced to banana bread for like the 20th time, but I'm addicted to it. And I love banana bread. This is the first time I kept it in the fridge. And I was like, why have I never done this? Yeah, keep it in the fridge. Yeah, good. But I have a good recipe that I'll share with you. I will tell you, you have to bake it way longer than it says. That's every banana pumpkin bread I ever invented. Low and long. Yeah. Every time I like pumpkin bread, 45 minutes, pulled out wet in the middle. Like what is the baking temperature? And bad. And yeah, they do. It's such a treat. Totally. That's so good. Mine will be a taco soup that I invented on my own. I make this. I'm making taco soup today. Yeah, I hear your recipe. OK, I'll just share it and then I'll have you guys write it out to you. Ready, Hannah? OK, half an onion diced and sauteed with some garlic. Then you're going to throw in one pound of ground beef. And I'm going to cheat. I'm going to do a packet of taco seasoning in there. It just is better. You can do a homemade taco seasoning and that's great. How is that cheating? Well, I just never do it because there's always like added kind of icky ingredients in there. Oh, you want to go check on them? Yeah, you keep talking. OK, so then you add in that packet of seasoning. What else I put in it? Oh, I put in a dice, canned diced tomatoes, two cans of black beans. One can of frozen one can of corn or frozen corn. OK, those are everything going in there. Then you're going to do some chicken broth. Let it simmer all together. Oh, a three fourths cup of rice. Let it simmer together. Rice. I love rice in it. Rice in there. It makes it a little thicker. It's really hardy. It's delicious. Put a little rice in there and obviously put in as much broth as you want. Let it cook until the rice is done cooking through. And then you're going to put in a little bit of cheddar cheese and just a scoop or two of sour cream. And that's it. Edwit chips and avocado. That's what we do. OK, so good. That was pretty there. The rice threw me for a loop. Yeah, everything else. Uh huh. Yes. I love the rice addition. Yeah, well, that's that's always hungry for you guys. If you guys would be so kind as to leave us a review wherever you guys listen to your podcast, that would be so appreciated. This is a review from M Brown 579. She says, I binged every episode of five stars. I found this podcast a couple of weeks ago and I've already listened to every episode. You all are so funny. I have literally laughed out loud at some of the episodes. I feel so much lighter after every listen. Thank you for what you're doing. Thank you so much for that review. It just means so much to us. There are a lot of people here behind the scenes that help and make this podcast come to life. So just hearing that you guys are loving and enjoying the show really means a lot to us. Make sure to like that button, follow, subscribe, check out our Patreon. If you guys haven't, it's five dollars a month. We get extended bonus episodes. We have our chats. We're putting recipes in there and always hungry. We're doing our book club over there, like more extended. And we've got a lot of fun stuff up in the works for you guys for our Patreon community. It is just a blast over there. So thank you guys. If you've already joined and Abby is out helping a baby. So I guess it's just me doing this. Addie, you want to join me? Yep. Okay, ladies and remember, we're always here.