Giggling about windbreakergate, celeb sightings, and sperm

Monday AI agents took over my work. And I absolutely love it! Chasing deadlines, writing status reports, updating stakeholders. Agents handle the daily grind now. They live inside Monday.com so they see the full picture. My work, my team, the whole company. And I don't have to worry about the data. It's safe, which means I'm free to focus on the big stuff. Knowing everything runs smoothly in the background. It completely shifted the way we work. Create your own AI agent in minutes on Monday.com. You know, we're making art here. Stop, Gigglers. Gary, fix your Wi-Fi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed. Ha ha ha! I mean, the day just got away from me. My gaggle of Gigglers. Yes. Phenomenal one. Oh my god, now my head's all big. Also, you complimented my t-shirt at the airport and I was like... No, you were being low-key chic at the airport. You never said those words to describe me before. Well, let's apologize to the Academy. Yeah, for? This is our first late episode in forever. Well, we were bamboozled, we were hoodwinked. The grease is on vacation, she left us for dead. We're literally lost chickens without her. Honestly, Josephine texted me over the weekend and she was like, did you take any pictures? And I go, I knew I was forgetting. No, Grace is on vacation, texts me, be like, are you OK? And I'm like, yeah, go have fun. Go have fun. Meanwhile, we're drowning. We're drowning, we're drowning. We had a crazy weekend in the Netflix The Joke Festival. I feel like we should start from the top. Should we just address One Breaker Gate? I feel like it's such a scene that needs to be set. Because it's such a full story. Let's start on Monday. Let's take it all the way back. Monday morning, we record the pod. We do some more housekeeping things. We're having just such a good best friend day. Hannah comes back to my apartment. We're getting our nails and toes done. We're yapping. You showed me your closet. Hannah, I showed Hannah new things I bought. I tried on jackets. I was walking in her closet. I see something like, that's cute. And then she told me a whole story about how she sourced from fucking Germany. I was like, this is my dream. Come in my closet and look at my stuff. I actually had so much fun. I felt like I was in my grandma's closet with all her perfumes. And I was like, this is what princesses do. I was like, I have stuff over here. And I have stuff over here. So anyway, so we're sitting there. And I was like, oh, what are you wearing Saturday night for Netflix as a joke for our performance? And Hannah goes, I really want to wear something cool. I just want to do Caprice and a windbreaker. And I was like, I love it. Very in, very chic, very young. Because it's like a sports show running point. So I was like, let's lean in, honey. Lean into a theme. And so she goes, I ordered a windbreaker on Fashion Nova. No hate, no shade. No hate, no shade, no tea. I say, love it. But we are going to be on stage with Kate Hudson. I think this windbreaker trend is crazy. Because I did buy Fashion Nova windbreakers. And they're fucking cunt. And they're cool. And yeah, they don't have a designer label on it. But I was feeling myself. But you looked at me and you said. They get the job done. They get the job done. But you were like, Hannah. Kate Hudson, Minty Kaling and Brenda Sanger taking time out of their very important busy days. They've looked in their closets. To be in our closet. They've called stylist. They've picked out an outfit. Minty Kaling showed up in a Gucci matching set. So I say, Hannah, I love you so much. I love where your head's at. I have a YSL windbreaker that I think will be perfect for the aesthetic you're trying to execute. I run upstairs. I get my YSL windbreaker. She tries it on. Perfect. We love it. One thing that'll make you panic is knowing I'm unprepared and I'm going to embarrass you. So thinking back, it does look strategic for me to be like, I don't know what it's going to wear. I guess I have to wear your YSL windbreaker. I went into a full body sweat. I was immediately panicked. You were like, I don't want to do this, but I have to do this. It was for the greater good of America that I had to put my YSL windbreaker out there. Now, this is so page coded, but this YSL windbreaker is sold out everywhere. I was thinking about if I were to get bullenets on it, I can't just buy her another one. It's done. No one has this color combo. You can't find this color combo in the streets I had to have it sourced. Yes. It's an endangered species. She had to give away rights to her first born to get this windbreaker. The coveted is how I sourced it. They got it for me. But I also think the windbreaker is one thing right now that's you coded and me coded. And also it fit me. You were so excited. You're like, you're perfect. I'm to worry about you. Thank God. It was perfect. And so I literally mentally checked that box. Like, OK, Hannah has an outfit. Great, we can go to the event. But immediately I was scared. I was like, do you want me to take it with me? And you were like, yeah. And I'm like, you don't want to pack it. You trust me to pack it? Like you were like, you're grown up. Just figure it out. I was like, take it. So OK, I mentally checked that off my list. We get to the airport Wednesday. We're flying to LA. We're sitting. We're waiting for our plane. I'm making casual conversation. I'm sorry, wait. Were you not recording? That's OK. That's OK. That's OK. It's fine. You can't beat yourself up. Grace! It's OK. Grace, why? OK, so anyway, so back to our story. So we're sitting in the airport. We're making casual conversation. When we land in LA, Hannah is going to the Chelsea Handler live show. But you didn't know what we were in for. I found out my Hulu special is dropping June 5th. So I was like, I have to do press when I'm in LA. And I find out that they were there. We book a podcast in the morning, a Netflix brunch, and the show at night. Now, look, I'm a resourceful person. And if I find an outfit that works, why risk an outfit that isn't going to work? We all remember the green corset of 2022. I'll do this all the time. I put together an outfit to get drinks the other night, and it looked good. I'm wearing this every day this week. But then I realized this isn't my clothes. This is Paige's $35,000 windbreak. So then I was going to do it and not tell you, but I was looking at you, and you were looking so sweet and nice. And I said, you know what? Let's get ahead of it. And I said, just so you know, I think I want to wear the windbreaker for some other shows. And I go, oh, what are you wearing tonight to the Chelsea Handler show? And she goes, the YSL windbreaker. And I go, oh, OK. And then I go, well, in the morning, what are you wearing to the brunch? And she goes, no, for Chelsea, I wore Pashanova. Because I felt like two days was that selfish. That's greedy. But I was like, is it really wearing it? It's just I just wore it one day. And mind you, this is my sweaty friend. I've been using my dog. I've been trying not to sweat. So I'm like dying in the airport. I'm like, Hannah, you can't wear the YSL windbreaker for every single event. And she's like, it's literally fine. So we go through the whole weekend. And she honestly crushes it in the YSL windbreaker. If it works, it works. Why change the recipe? When she did show up to the brunch in her Steve Madden tabby like heel, I did look her in the eye and say, you cannot wear these heels on stage. I literally won't go. So she changes her heel. I think I'm a different person when I'm packing. So I brought FameSick. And I brought, I'm glad my mother died. On the trip. But not a second outfit. God forbid. God forbid the trip we were taking for work for three different events. God forbid you brought a second outfit. Two books, Hannah. You can't. The people who were cleaning the room like organize them somewhere left them in no doubt. Because I didn't remember that old Hannah packed books. So when I was. Wait, that's so funny. I left my pimple cream in the hotel and that's so me. I get there and I take out the YSL windbreaker. I hang it up because I have respect for you. And I was nervous about it. I was actually freaking out. I kept checking it like every 10 minutes to make sure it was still there. It's like your passport when you go on a trip. You keep unzipping your suitcase. You're like, OK, cool. Literally. And then I realize I'm wearing my Cucapries. And I go, what a huge massive thing we forgot. A thong. So I go on Instacart. Target. And I press thong. And I'm like, I hope whatever male Instacart guy. And then you like said the Hail Mary 10 times. Did the rosary. And I was like, I'm a little slut. And I sent for. Also, I was like, what girl needs target thongs right now? So then I go to the Chelsea Handler show. A lot of reasons. Yeah, I had to go to the Chelsea Handler show. So I was like, let go and let go. I hope the Instacart finds its way back to me. Oh, commando to Chelsea Handler show? Or under the deck? I was wearing jeans. I was wearing jeans. Oh, got it. Got it. I was wearing my full beat. My full beat hands. Comfortable. Enjoying the last couple days of comfort and not the invasiveness of a thong. Dental floss. Yes. So I get back and it's like 11 PM. I'm getting my spray tan and I'm like, oh, that's weird. Where's the Instacart? And I look and it says it was delivered. So I'm like, I'll just call downstairs. I'm like, hey, was there an Instacart for Hannah Burner? And they're like, what's it from? And I was like, I think it's Target. And they're like, let me check. And he comes back and he goes, is it underpants? And I'm like, why the fuck did you look in the how many Target bags did you have in the hotel? And also never say underpants again. Underpants? I go, I'm a grown up wearing a thong. I'm a fucking little slut wearing a thong. So the guy literally comes up, the same guy who knows I ordered underpants, comes up, looks me in the eye. And I said, thank you, sir. Good night. So next time you take fun of me for having to wear the same outfit all day, note that there's a lot of stuff going on underneath. I'm literally crying. I'm like, I'm just trying to live. I'm just trying to be the best I could be. And people don't like me. Because I'm like, you had to order thongs. If I showed up at the Netflix brunch with panty lines, I would have been more tough. Hide. Because it's with your windbreaker. So it's like disrespecting the windbreaker. The YSL outfit was perfect. And I did put on really nice heels for the show. But I ended up having this big podcast in the morning. And I was like, Paige would love me to wear the YSL for that. And all these things are photographed. Then we go to the craziest Netflix brunch. And they're taking photos everywhere. And the thing is with the blazer, the windbreaker, it's not subtle. Like it's the moment. So people aren't going to forget that I was wearing an orange windbreaker everywhere. So at this brunch, I run into Kate Hudson. I say, oh no. Oh no. This is my nightmare. And she's like, are you? You're doing the panel with me later, right? And I said, and I'm trying to cover the windbreaker. I'm like, yeah. And I'm like, can't wait to see you there. Kate Hudson shows up in a gorgeous gown. I'm staying there in my windbreaker. Gorgeous. It's literally art. She's standing in an art piece that she's like, oh, it's a skirt I had. I'm like, that should be in the Louvre. And Hannah's here. In the same windbreaker she saw me in six hours ago. Tell them what my mom messaged you. So then I'm on the plane Friday morning, coming back to the East Coast. I get a DM from none other than Lenore Burner. Who hasn't spoken to me unbeknownst? I'm so sad. She's like, Jesus. Did Hannah's luggage get lost? Question mark? Why is she wearing that outfit? Question mark. I go, LOL. She said she wanted to wear it. She doesn't look bad. But did she wear that two days in a row? Period. I'm confused. Period. Sorry. Hannah, I nearly fell off my chair. And this is why no one will ever hurt my feelings, because my mom is my biggest opp. My mom goes, I'm confused. Sorry. I love how she's like, I need to find out from Paige why this has happened. I love how she's like, she doesn't look bad. It's just like, why did you wear the same outfit from 10 AM to 10 PM today? No, she literally was that TikTok being like, I love her, but like, she was like, I don't know what's going on. But she's amazing, but like, sorry. I love her, but she like, is the problem. And I'm like, no, I'm obsessed with her. But it was cunt. No, it totally was. Also, I spent a pretty penny on that windbreaker. Let her get out there. Let her see the town. Let her be photographed on other bodies. OK, that was good. Don't body positivity me. She's like, I wanted to see different experiences hug in different places. But no, I wanted to milk over what it was worth, even though you paid for it. Also, yeah, we don't write it off. We don't fit in the same clothes. Like it's not normal that page is like, I don't want to wear this. Do you want to wear it? I'd be like, no, my ass will hang out because you love a little mini, mini thing. Right. This was just two girls sharing clothes, just sisters. And it's so sisterly for you to be like, hey, are you going to give me back that windbreaker? You know what's funny is because the pictures from the brunch at the same DM that I kept getting was like, why do you and Hannah look alike at the brunch? And I truly feel like we're morphing into the same person a little bit. It's almost like when you look like your dog. Wait, OK. So Netflix is a joke festival has this brunch. You got there early. Unbeknownst to me, I thought you were going to wait. But I was in a four hour podcast in my YSL Windbreaker. And I have these texts from Paige saying, where are you? You're dead to me. You left me for dead. I'm going to kill you. You're dead to me. And I'm like, OK. And I realize she's been there for an hour without me. Oh, I was going to say, mind you, it's like 15 minutes. I went to the driver. I was like, step on it. My friends alone. My friends in danger. The amount of small talk that I had to do, honestly, the only way I could describe it is I felt like I went to visit my friends college for the weekend. And this was the first Friday night party. And you were bringing me around being like, this is my friend. She goes to a different school, but she's here for the weekend. So have fun. And you guys have seen her around. Yeah. You're like, you've definitely seen her on my Instagram. No, she doesn't go here. But she's really fun. She's my friend. Literally, the head of Netflix was like, she doesn't even go here. And you were just in a hoodie in the back. But it was so fun because I feel like my comedy friends, my co-workers in this other job I have. So I was also showing off. I was like, Paige, look at all my friends. And I started, I got in crazy Hanon mode again. Well, you and I are very different that when we get into a situation that's over-stimulating or a lot of things happening, I get more reserved and quiet. And you get louder and talk. There was a moment where Hannah just yelled, women and children only. OK. OK. Yeah. What are you guys saying? By the way, this is the most insane brunch we're like ever. Imagine you spot a celebrity, that feeling you get. Imagine that's every time you look somewhere. So I look Eddie Murphy's right there, Kevin Hart's right there, Nikki Glazer's right there, Nick Krull's right there, David Letterman's right there, John Stewart's right there. That's just who you're with. And we had to take this big photo. And we're all trying to figure out where to stand. And it got kind of chaotic. And then at one point, I was just feeling myself. I go, women and children only. I look back and Nick Krull's just standing there. And I was like, hi, Nick Krull. No, there was a moment where I squeezed Hannah's arm. And I was like, shut up. But I put down the window of the car. And I was like yelling at Chelsea Handler. Literally, I was like, stop causing a spectacle. No, you literally were like, kind of stop. Hannah, get in the car. Hannah, get in the car. I clenched my teeth. And I was like, we have to go. You've had enough. You've had enough. We'll talk about this later. Take off the windbreaker. Take off the windbreaker. I feel the adrenaline hit. And I was looking at you. Like, I couldn't control myself. Like, you knew I wanted to be normal. But I was like, I was like, Paige, I've lost it. You were too so excited. I got so excited to see all my friends and all these people I look up to. Did go up to Matt Reif and tell him that I have a joke about him in my upcoming special. We don't know if he loved it or not, but. He laughed. We'll see. We'll see. I feel like that was like a respect thing. He laughed and then he walked away. He was like, I'm done here. No, the brunch was very cool. I loved my glam. So I was having a good time, which is really that's so something unhealthy. But it's fine. You looked so good. Thank you. And I loved my dress. Did you meet anyone that you were excited to meet there? Or you were just observing? I was observing. I didn't want to go up to anyone and be annoying. Obviously, I love seeing Chelsea Handler and Nikki Glazer. And I love seeing the girls. And it was so much fun. Taylor Tomlinson said she loves our clips, which we love. Taylor, shout out, iconic. But the actual event of Mindy Kaling, Brenda Song, Kate Hudson was, first of all, I am Mindy Mindy is me. I felt like we were long lost sisters. Actually, I felt like we were friends from high school that hadn't seen each other in a minute, but it was like nothing had, no time had passed. But it was also giving maybe one to different high schools, but you were the same font in that high school. And so we were cool with each other. She was like, I know what it's like being prom queen 800 times. You had to run the society of whatever. It's exhausting. I know that. And no one gives you any credit for how beautiful you are. Like that was the vibe we were giving to each other. And I feel like Kate Hudson was so hannocoded in so many different situations. And let me tell you, she's the definition of Wednesday. There's something about her aura that's very calming, while also being, oh my god, I don't even know what the word is. It's not starstruck. And it's not, you're not like. You say starstruck it. Starstruck. Like it wasn't like I was starstruck, but I was very aware that you're like. No, I was a celebrity. Well, you're a bitch because Kate Hudson, we asked her about revenge. How they feel about revenge. And Kate Hudson was like, we love forgiveness. And I was like, I love that Kate. I love forgiveness too. And then you called my ass out and you said Hannah Burner. You were the most vengeful person I've ever met. So I'm trying to suck up to Kate Hudson and make her like you. And I said, how dare you call me out. I was about to be best friends with Kate Hudson. And then you called me a fraud. I like forgot the crowd was there because I was like, don't embarrass yourself in front of Kate Hudson. Yeah. But Kate Hudson, what I love about her is she's exactly how she is in every rom-com. Like she's the same person. If you think about meeting her, it's exactly who you want her to be. Easy laugh her, charming little jokes under her breath. Ah, she's just so iconic. And she's nominated for an Oscar for singing last year. Yeah. And you just want to like keep looking at her and like be around her. She has a very like infectious smile and personality. And Brenda Song. Oh my God. One of the most down to earth, very nice. Just I just felt like we were girls together. I didn't want to bring this up on the panel because it seemed like too intense. But I was like, she's been acting since she's three years old. Yeah. Like the fact that she's as normal as she is. She's been a lot of stuff too. A lot of stuff. She's had so many different lives in Hollywood. The fact that she's so fucking well rounded and cool and like. She was in the Facebook movie. Oh my God, she's done everything. Also, she's married to Macaulay Culkin. I forgot about that. I mean, she's London Tipton. She's London fucking. Which was always my favorite. I feel like I was like a little bit too old for that show, but I knew. Well, you love London. I knew I was a London Tipton girl. I'm also a Sharpay Evans. You wanted your name to be London Tipton. It definitely was on my baby name. For a time. She also wore this outfit that was both Hannah and Paige coded because she said that to us. Yeah, which was crazy. Wait, we didn't talk about at the Netflix's joke brunch. I don't have to say that full. Yeah, every time. That's crazy. Just say the brunch. We met Britney Snow. No, you attacked her. Oh, no, physically and emotionally. Oh, no, in my head, we met her. But you're right. You're right. You're right. I grabbed her by the shoulders and I told her, I loved her. You're right. I assaulted Britney Snow. I go, Britney Snow came up to us and you go, no, she didn't. Unfortunately, she didn't know. No, you know what happened? I did tell her she was my Carolyn Bissette. No, because she had a very Carolyn Bissette outfit on. She had like the perfect black maxi skirt and like a white button up. And I was like, so chic. Can I say what actually happened? I made eye contact with her while you were trying to pull me out of the party. Yeah. I ripped you off of me. I said, I said, stop it. It's Britney Snow. And she locked eyes with us. Like she knew you don't do drugs. You would be a nightmare to go out with. Oh my, I'd have to leave you on the street. I was on drugs at that party. But I go up to her. Do you know what I said? I said, you're in everything right now. I'm obsessed with you. And she's like, oh my God, thank you. And I'm like, you're like Glenn Powell. And then I was like, I didn't mean that in like a, no, I didn't mean it. And then she was like, no, I know what you mean. I was like, oh, oh, and then you were like, you're killing it. I'm like, better. That was better. I had to come in, save. Apparently anything Glenn Powell wants to do, Hollywood makes. Like that's what I meant. Like anything she wants to be in, I'm like, make it. Yeah. Everyone's going to watch it. She's everything. Also her style is so fucking good now. And then you were like, how do we have a live show in 30 minutes? And but I'm like, I'm wearing the same outfit. I don't need to leave early. I'm going home, washing my face, getting glam redone. Wait, I loved my LA glam. You looked sexy. Like you had a like, Jenna, I said, no, I had a moment where I was like, should I move down? Lay for a couple months because like I'm really feeling this glam and like who my style is when I'm there. What did you think it was about the makeup? Cause like you obviously looked like yourself, but like, was it the brow? Like what made it more sexy? I think it was my spray tan. At the end of the day. And now we've set it. Now we've set it. You guys know we live and die by revolve when I don't want to overthink it because there's so much going on. I go to revolve. I find whatever event I'm going to, it has all the curated recommendations and I order all the stuff I want to try on. And then it's I'm so bad at returning things. Returns are so easy and shipping is so fast. Like it really gets you out of got me out of so many pinches and pickles. Also, yeah, when you're like last minute, you could also know you have an event coming up and you've ordered something for it. And then you're like, I hate everything and revolve will always come in handy because they're shipping. No, it's just like it's next level. They have like a festival shop festival shop that like I think went off during Coachella. Oh my God, I'm sure. I love when they break it down to like vacation work festival because you're like, yep, this is like my, this is what I'm doing. This is where I'm going. And I actually just wear this like black cut out dress from revolve. And it was super last minute. I had to go to a dinner. Came beautiful, fit, gorgeous love. I recently got shoes because, you know, you have an outfit. This never happened to you, but you have an outfit and you're like, I did not think about the shoes and I need it. That's what happened to me. And they have all the brands I actually wear in one place. You have to go to like a bazillion websites. All the brands are there. I love my Aigle Bumperal jeans that I got there. I like live in them. And then also I'll randomly get like skimpy girls sometimes. So whether it's a girl's night, a date or you're running into your ex, but thriving, revolve has it. Go to revolve.com forward slash giggly and use code GIGLY for 15% off your first order. Offer ends May 19th, so don't miss out. Monday AI agents took over my work and I absolutely love it. Chasing deadlines, writing status reports, updating stakeholders. Agents handle the daily grind now. They live inside Monday.com, so they see the full picture. My work, my team, the whole company. And I don't have to worry about the data. It's safe, which means I'm free to focus on the big stuff. Knowing everything runs smoothly in the background. It completely shifted the way we work. Create your own AI agent in minutes on Monday.com. I got a spray tan at 10 30 p.m. After the Chelsea Handler show and we were getting on the plane and Hannah was like, I have a spray tan tonight. And I was like, pardon, I was like, you didn't even tell me. And so then I was like, well, I'll get a spray tan too. It can be your pale, weird friend. Which I've been many times. It's not that bad. The only place I like getting spray tans is in Los Angeles. They don't fuck around with it. They're like, I don't know. I've just been to Los Angeles. They don't fuck around with it. They're artists. Like I've yet to find a really good spray tan artist in New York City for whatever reason. I feel like everyone goes to Sugared and Bronze in New York. And I, not that I just like them. I just feel like I did that in my early 20s and they changed their formula at some point. And ever since then, I don't feel like it looks the same on my particular body. And they're Snapchat at them. Like the fucking marketing girls like, oh, no, I love them. No, I love them. I think they're great. They are great. I think they're great. If you're the kind of girl that's like, I'm making an appointment. I'm going after work on a Thursday, getting ready. I don't like to leave my apartment. So I like someone to come to my house. I've yet to find someone in New York City that comes to my house that I think is good. Love Sugared and Bronze. I had a little incident with them where I was there. This was during like reality TV and a girl was like in my labial lips. And she's like, by the way, like I love you on summer house. And I was like, yeah, and then I got on the subway after and sweat through my entire tan. And I was like, this is not going to work. But I feel like LA has to be good spray tans because people around you are tan. We're New York when you guys spray tan, everyone else is pale. So it doesn't even have to be that good. You're like, I'm glistening where LA you're competing with actual tans around you. They contour. I know that New York City is like the fashion capital or one of the fashion capitals of the world, but there's something about New York City that's like, you can be a gremlin on the street. And there's an in other cities. Sometimes it doesn't feel as accepted and LA is one of those cities. And not even gremlin. You can express any range of emotions. You can express you can yell at people. You can cry. You could sing in any outfit and becoming or going from anywhere. And I appreciate that. It's a Sunday and she's in full sweats and like. Yep. Or full glam or full glam. I mean, you do photo shoots in the middle of the street in New York City. And everyone's like, she's working. That's my front yard. So that's my office. Did you get on one of those buses? Oh my God. Okay. So the Daphne summer comes out on Tuesday, actually on the 12th. And that's a summer. And so like we were like, let's do like our vibe this summer is like, let's do like city in the summer. So we're coming up with like all these different ideas and they're like, what if we get on one of those buses? And I'm like, okay, but we're going to have to like buy tickets. Yeah, to like get out because you like buy tickets to get on those buses. And then you have to like do a 45 minute tour. And because I was like, how are we going to get the pictures? So it's me, like one other girl, the photographer, we get on. We buy tickets. We get on the bus. We already like know the route. We like did it the day before to like know what to do. Get on the bus. We use the tour guide. Like, um, no one's listening in the back. We're doing a full. Everyone starts getting on. There's like the sweetest families in the back row. And we're like, hey, do you mind if you move for just like one minute? I'm going to take a quick picture and then you can sit back down. This family, by the way, this is what she did to me on my bachelorette. Continue. This family was so sweet. That's how I knew they were tourists. They were probably like, what a New York city moment. This random woman is going to just have a photo shoot. They move. They move their kids. They're like watching me do the pictures. They're like, they're fanning you. These are giving you notes. They're like, chin down. They now work for Daphne. They're getting BTS. We get the picture. We get off before the tour starts. So we didn't even have to do the tour. But, but thank God we bought the tickets just in case because like the bus could have started moving. Um, but then we got it and it was great. There was so much stuff. I don't want to just quickly. What's the word? Yeah. Skip over. It's a couple. It's a couple words, but yeah. Chelsea Handler show. You guys don't understand my Laura Chelsea Handler. I taught tennis to her when I was younger. She doesn't remember. I was like, I've read all your books. You're my everything. Chelsea lately made me want to be me to men. Wait, I didn't know you taught tennis to her when you were younger. Um, after college, I was teaching tennis and shelter Island to like six year olds to like 85 year old men. And one of my older male clients was like, Oh, Chelsea is coming to play doubles with us today because she was dating Andre Belaj at the time who had a hotel on shelter Island. Who the heck is Andre? You just said that. Like we all know he's, he's a hotelier. Oh, chic. I've never said hotelier before that was iconic. Chelsea fucking Handler comes in and this was during Chelsea lately. And this is like my knees went weak. I was like double faulting. I was like, so nervous. It's one thing to like be with your, your, the, your, the person you look up to for like a minute and meet them. I played doubles with her. That's intimate. It was crazy. And I, I had to pretend that I didn't know anything about her. I was like, where are you from? New Jersey. Wait, I love that she's from New Jersey. Like I think New Jersey gets such a bad rep, but I genuinely do think some of the funniest people I've met in my like personal life are from New Jersey. And at the end, like I was, cause I was, I had no idea what I wanted to do for a living. I did not think I was going to be in comedy. And I was just like, do you have any advice for like women in the workforce? And she looks at me and she was like, I got lucky. I got iconic. And then when I met her years later, I told her about it and she was like, I must have been high. Don't that doesn't bring any. Horrible advice. Like I've never been to shelter island before. That wasn't me. You weird freak. Here's one thing I want to say about Chelsea handler and I'm not even trying to like suck these celebrities like assholes. I'm like genuinely saying my experience. I think they're in any field, no matter what you do for a living. I think there are so many women that say, I want to like make room at the table for you or I want to like help you. I want to be a mentor or whatever. Chelsea handler is one of those people that I feel like says that stuff and actually means it. Like anytime I've ever seen her in a public setting, I've never felt more safe to be with someone and it's almost in, and I know she doesn't have children. It's almost in a very maternal way. And so like it is something to say about like, I think that women who don't have children, sometimes people can say like really mean things to them. And I, and I think that your maternal instincts can come out in so many different ways rather than just having children. There is something so maternal about her that is so comforting. And I feel like she genuinely means what she says. Like when I saw her at the brunch, she literally looked at both of us and said like my two little girls, like I instantly healed my inner child. I was like, Chelsea's out here. Like she's taking care of her whole family, by the way. She's she has so many amazing friendships in her life. She also, she does have a lot of people. She's a mom to like the all of America to me. I'm like, I called him. I was like, you're out. Chelsea's answering my emails now. Long story short. She's like, come to the show tonight. And I was like, this is a dream because I actually, I don't think I've ever seen her like live. And I get there and I realize, oh, everyone's friends with Chelsea handler. I walk in immediately see Tanimojo. No way. And we're talking about podcasting. Wait, there are so many times where I've quoted Tanimojo and people have like looked at me and I'm like, guys, you need to get on the internet. And the number one quote that I quote from her is whenever she. Remember when DJ Khaled said he doesn't eat his wife out? And then Tanimojo says, but you eat everything else. And so the amount of times I've said in my everyday life, but you eat everything else. My dream for her is I want her to like come out because she had a singing career at one point. Oh, I want her to remix her most iconic things. Like if she made bleach and tone into a song, the clubs would lose their fucking mind and I don't know why she keeps me like it's a good idea. I'll and like she's not. And maybe there's some DJ will do it for her. But anyway, that's what we were saying. I continue to walk in. Monica Lewinsky. What? Monica Lewinsky is standing at the bar. I don't know. You know me. I don't approach people unless they make eye contact or I've known them. I've met them before. I don't cold call celebrities. When is Monica Lewinsky going to do like a big documentary? And like, I mean, I think it's her time now. Imagine if that happened now. I think she's done some form of documentaries and she has an amazing podcast. However, um, it she needs to have like a. Yeah, because like I couldn't imagine in today's day and age us looking at like a 25 year old girl in the White House being like, she tricked the president of the United States. Like that was so fucked up. Also remember when that was the craziest thing that happened in our government? Whimsy and fun. But I was with Gabby and Stuart and I go, I don't know what came over me, but I was like, we need to say hi to her. We swarm her and we just go, Monica, you're so inspirational. We love you. You're amazing. You're everything. And she was so nice. And then we left, but I was like, so happy I attacked. I need a Ryan Murphy, Monica Lewinsky show. I need a real. She does play Bill Clinton. Wait. You can't play the saxophone, but he does have a nice, so wait, I'm obsessed with that idea. Should we just cast it? Should we just do like a play in your backyard? Sorry, we're busy. We're late on the podcast today. Des forgot his lines. You know, they think about all the time that your parents performed a play last summer and it like literally I could cry when I think about it because I think it's so sweet. My parents didn't just perform a play. My mom ended up writing, producing, directing the play. God forbid the woman takes a break. She's retired, by the way. And I'd call her and she's like, we're rehearsing. So we're Monica Lewinsky's behind me. Tan emojis. Yes. Sorry, we are going into many tangents. Okay. Yeah. And then Tish Cyrus walks in. My mom, I was too nervous to say anything. Cause again, what do I have? What am I going to be like? What am I saying? I don't know. I'm saying a Tish. What am I saying? A Tish. So I left Tish alone. We must leave Tish alone. Also is Tish a full name or is it a part? Tish is tired. Do you know Tish? Me. So Tish's other daughter, Noah, was dating a guy. They broke up. Tish married the guy. Put that in your straw and drink it this morning. These hoes ain't loyal. He's hoes ain't loyal. But again. That's crazy. And I don't think Tish and Noah speak. And I don't know if Noah speaks to Miley because I think Miley, I think she went to the wedding. So she was kind of like, okay. So then there's like this little after party in the lobby and there's a very tall woman in like the middle. So obviously my eyes went to her. Maria Sharapova. Maria Sharapova. Now. Wait, when Hannah was telling me, like she briefly told me that she saw Maria Sharapova and I just kind of looked at her like, okay. And she looked back at me and she goes, you walk in a room and half the way is there. I'm like, got it. Yep. Okay, keep going. Because my friends, I guess, didn't really know Maria Sharapova and I'm freaking out and they're like, go talk to her. Go talk to her. I said, I'm not disrespecting Maria Sharapova. Also, imagine your whole life, you're watching someone and like they're your idol. And then you have a chance to say something to them and it doesn't go well. And like 80% of my interactions don't go well. And that's that you've harmed the image of your idol and your head forever. That is so depressing. So they were like, they literally, we had, I don't have like a 30 minute conversation of why I wasn't going to talk to Maria Sharapova. But my thing with some of these people is I will meet her when I'm supposed to meet her. Like, I don't know when it'll be, but it was not that time. It was not the moment. Monday AI agents took over my work and I absolutely love it. Chasing deadlines, writing status reports, updating stakeholders. Agents handle the daily grind now. They live inside Monday.com so they see the full picture. My work, my team, the whole company. And I don't have to worry about the data. It's safe, which means I'm free to focus on the big stuff. Knowing everything runs smoothly in the background. It completely shifted the way we work. Create your own AI agent in minutes on Monday.com. Elant Bess was also there. Okay. And I ended up, you know, when you're in a conversation, but like you haven't been introduced, I somehow found myself in a conversation with him, but not talking to him and trying not to acknowledge that I know him. And he knows, he's like, look at this millennial bitch. Like obviously she's obsessed with me. Right, Elant Bess. So I was just, I just stayed quiet the whole time. Can I tell you something? Because I see a lot of people online being like, Pigeonings everyone's gay. Like not all her ex-boyfriends are gay. If it doesn't clock to you, Elant Bess was my favorite in NSYNC. Okay, so yeah. Actually, I do have a little knowledge on what it's like to have a crush on a gay man. Is there a word for like the gaydar of if you're attracted to them, he's gay? I don't know, but I think I could like put it in numerical form if I did the appropriate research. Because what are the chances and everyone was out here loving Justin Timberlake. And I thought too straight for me. Have a crush on Lance Bass. Do you know who I liked? Who? Joey Fatone. No, but he was cute. Who did you like? Because I would have said Lance Bass. JC. You did? Yeah, because he was the underdog. I was like, he's the one with a good voice. And Justin Timberlake is just dancing around the front and I'm like, let JC sing. JC is the real talent here. And he was kind of quiet. Yeah. And I like that in a man. Yeah. Yeah, I like that in a man too. But I wouldn't have seen you as a Justin Timberlake. I did like Justin Timberlake, but I knew that we weren't going to settle down. Right. Like I'm not going to, I was like, we're not. He's not going to. We're not for each other. Yeah, he's not going to be like husband material where JC was husband material. Same with Backstreet Boys. Like I liked. What was his name? Not Aaron Carter. Nick Carter. And it's like, you have bad taste in men. Nick Carter is bad. I can acknowledge that he's attractive, but he's again, let's start calling men not marriage material. Let's start calling out men's bad behavior and not saying that women pick badly. Yeah. Also a lot of the time the women aren't picking. It's the men that come to us. They lie and then they lie. Lie. And then the women are told that they picked wrong. And then you're six months in, you're like, wait, where's your personality? And he's like, oh, I changed it. This is my new one. And you're like, what? It's very scary. It's very rattling. Anyhow, since we're on like a little bit of a celebrity, like gossip session right now, Timothy and Kylie, I can't get enough. I'm obsessed. Did you see them like kissing at the next game? Did you see her with like her, her digital camera, just like taking pics, having just like being a girl at a basketball game. She is me when I'm with a man at a sporting event because I'm like, I don't care. I don't give a flying fuck. She has to go to a lot of games. Like she's not even watching her husband play. She's watching her husband watch other men play. That's when you know you really love someone. When like the things that they like that you don't care about, you get excited to watch them be excited to like have fun. That's kind of like when Des and I are trying to pick something to watch and he gets, he's really excited to watch something and I don't care. Yeah. I'll enjoy it because he's enjoying it. And then he's like, you can watch it without me. And I'm like, that's okay. If you're dating a guy and you find his hobbies to be like, well, there's so much nuance in that. I can't say that. Wait, I love this is the first time in the pod ever. You're like, I'm not going to say that because there's nuance to it. There's nuance. There's nuance there. And I can't make up. I actually can't make a blanket statement, which was what I usually like to do on things that I don't know much about. Wait, my friend Katie had a baby literally yesterday and I went to send. I was like, oh, I have to send like something, something to the house for her to get home. It's a very weird feeling when your friend texts you and is like, Hey, baby's here. The ego has landed. You're like, are they staying? And so I'm sitting there and I'm thinking, I'm like, I'm like, what should I send to the house for the baby? And then I realized she's a small baby. My friend, like I'm like, so I sent her a Lola blanket because I was like, no, Katie is the small baby who they just made give birth. Lowkey, I get nervous though, because it is like your friend introducing you to someone new and it's like, I don't know this bitch. It's also funny because it's like, I've been friends with Katie for like over 10 years now and she sent me a picture of her baby. And in my head, I was like, I know that you love him more than me now. Another thing I just want to say to like about this past weekend, traveling to the West coast is just in itself, like a whole thing. Trauma. And I'm not even like saying anything. I'm just saying about traveling in general, whether you're traveling on a train, a plane, a bus or whatever, wherever you are in your journey. I don't think serving fish is ever appropriate ever in any capacity. If you're on Delta, they're trying to push shrimp on you. If you're on jet, I literally got on a jet blue flight and they said, do you want to trout Christina? I said, I literally looked at this man and I said, does anyone want to trout Christina on here? See, that's where me and you were different. I said, I've been having a boring ass day. Let's see. That's my drug of choice. I'm like a trout Christina in the middle of a plane where the bathroom is very far. I just think when you're traveling in the air inside of a tin can, there's so many variables. Why throw in one that we don't need. And that would be fish on a plane. God forbid one trout went bad. And all it takes is one trout. And then in my head, I'm sitting there and I was like, I haven't said the word trout since the parent trap. And I couldn't stop thinking about it. You know what I was thinking about with fish? This lady was telling me about how salmon sperm facials are doing so well and everyone loves salmon sperm and salmon sperm. I'm like, what about other fishes sperm? Like other fish, like my calm means nothing. Like why is it just the salmon that there come is good for people's faces. There's so many fish out there. What about a flute? What about a. And like I can't listen. I don't know any other fish. Are the salmon in the water just being like, hey, we're more than our sperm. Like this is fucked up. You're telling me swordfish doesn't have good calm. Swordfishes are the fuck boys of the sea. A swordfish. What are the fish that are like the flat ones? Flute. A flounder flounder. Yeah. No, like stingray. I feel like they have really potent sperm. Anyway. Speaking of celebrities, can I just say something? Justice for Rachel Zeigler. Justice for Rachel Zeigler. Oh, it's snow white. Yeah. Why? Well, I just feel like we know her and she's like the nicest sweetest theater kid you've ever met in your life. They were being so mean to her at the Met Gala. I was just going to say we didn't even speak about the Met Gala. Yeah. And honestly, the only thing I can say about it is I thought a lot of people looked bad. I thought more people looked bad than they looked good. I don't think. And first of all, I thought the theme would when I heard the theme, I was like, oh, people are going to go really hard on this structure. I wanted literally pieces of works of art, but they were just like taking inspiration from like a painting of like a woman in a white dress. Yeah. And I just thought like. Or I spat you. Yeah, I just I didn't really like anyone's. It's funny because people are like, I think people are trying to be too cool. They're trying to be like, I'm just taking a hint of this like Monet photo. And like, I hate to say it, but the Kardashians are just so interesting to look at. Sorry, the Kardashians. They just are killed it. Did you see Gigi Hadid's interview? I did not page page. It was my biggest nightmare. Wait, why? What was it? She's she's have like, she's obviously stressed out. She's at the Met. She stops to do a favor and do someone's interview and they go, Gigi, what's your favorite piece of art? Oh, no, that's like whenever someone's like, what's the last book you read? And you're like, all kill my. You could tell she's like, I'm not going down without a fight. Yeah. She starts just kind of rambling. She's like every painting I've ever seen in my life. She starts going, I love collecting, collecting art is fun. I've looked at a lot of art. There's been like she's killed on it and it's the most painful watch. But like you cannot judge this girl because what will I would have just been like Michelangelo. You know, she should have said, she said, my child, my child. Yeah, that's a really good one. I would have immediately just been like the impressionist. I don't know. Like I don't know what would have come to my head. One time I was on a date with a guy and he asked me that question and I got so nervous. You should break up with him for that question. Like that's a setup that he wants you to fail. He's rooting against you. Okay. I thought about it for years after this date. Like it really fucked me up that I felt like so dumb and I came to the conclusion in my own head that he was trying to make me feel dumb. Like he didn't actually care to talk about like art. He just wanted me to feel, I actually think he wanted me to feel poor. Yeah. Cause that's such a pretentious question. I was like, shut the fuck up. I know I go to society six.com and I print out something. I don't know her to chest.com. Probably not. You should respond. I've been like, and what's your favorite female painter of the 1920s? I don't know. Really? It like, I thought about it for years. I don't know why it annoyed me so much. Anyway, well, I went on a podcast and they sent questions beforehand, which I'm a, I like to riff. I don't even like to look at what they're going to ask. But I saw a book and I was like, that got my attention. I started strangers. Do you love it? I love it. Are you doing audio or? And I don't judge. I'm reading. I'm reading. The audio, her voice, like is great. Okay. Maybe I'll do like a couple of chapters. Or you know what you can do? You can listen and read at the same time. Okay. That sounds nice. Yeah. Cause you, it flows. It flows. Um, I think that we should be allowed to kill one man a year. Here's what I will say as a for a warning. If you're reading the book. If you've even had, if you've even had a small discrepancy on like where the coffee was that morning with your partner, do not dive into this book because I found myself looking up from the book, looking around, being like, I'll murder someone. Because she's waspy and waspy people, like don't even talk about their feelings to their like children. They're just like, you know, Winston, get out of here. She's pouring her heart and soul about her privilege that these men, these rich men, it's, oh, it's so blood in fury. Like your blood starts boiling reading this. It's the audacity of these men. It, I can't, I can't wait to read it. Actually, I'm going to read it today when I go to the pool. So this podcast was like, do you, what's your favorite book turned into a movie? And I was like, oh my God, you lost me at book. Yeah. So then I'm Googling like books to me. I was like, can't say Harry Potter. I'm like, do I have to have read the book because I loved Gone Girl. That was a book. Yeah. Everything was a book. So anyway, we're in the pod. And then before that, they go, what was the last thing you Googled? And I'm like, let's pull it up. What's a movie that was that got turned a book that was turned into a movie? And they were like, thank you for your time. You know what I forget is that we're New York Times bestselling authors. Yeah, we're writers, writers and readers, which are two different things. Anyway, oh my God, that was so we just found out that we got recordings from the live show. And by the way, this wasn't like a typical live show. It was like a full interview, which we've never done with these incredible women. So let us know if you want us to post it. We're working through the logistics, if we're able to. And sorry, this episode was up late. We're really sorry. Hannah, do we're a thong? Gracie, you're slipping a fucking margarita right now while we are fighting for our life. No, we love you, Grace. You deserve it. And we'll talk to you guys later. Oh, and everyone mark your calendars. June 5th. Take out your gel pens. June 5th. Sharpie, whatever you use, put it in your little journal. And Hannah looks so good in her. We're excited. We're good. We got approvals. We're excited. We love you guys. Bye.