Arden Myrin & Sarah Colonna: Coffee Makers & Soup

Thank you all so much for being here at our wedding. I can't believe I get to spend the rest of my life with a woman of my dreams. Speaking of dreams, have you ever dreamed of tasting all the colours of the rainbow? Because that is exactly what you get with Skittles. Five bold fruit flavours in every pack. Lemon, orange, lime, strawberry and blackcurrant. They're chewy, they're colourful, they're perfect. Just like my wife. So thank you for coming and remember to buy Skittles. When you're Jeff Lewis, the drama never stops. They said that I am by far the most difficult talent that they're working with. You know, we could say we don't judge, I judge and I was judging. Money doesn't make you an asshole, but if you're an asshole and with a ton of money, you're going to be a bigger asshole. Why are you looking at me? No, I didn't mean to look in that direction. Why are you looking right at me? Jeff Lewis has issues. Hey, welcome to Jeff Lewis has issues. In today's episode, Arden Marine and Sarah Colono joined the show. We talk about hotel copy makers, cat ownership and chain restaurants. Good morning. Good morning. Do you ever do stand up, Arden? I used to tour doing it a bunch and then and then I stopped. Because I was going to say, if Sarah Colono can be successful at it, anyone can do it. Happy Monday everybody. Happy Monday. Yes, I used to do stand up. Happy International Women's Day. Arden, did Sarah tell you what today is? What is it? Mexican Monday. What happened? And John's out of town. Are we going to Mexico? Yes, I'm going to go by myself. Oh, where are we going? I'll have pharmacy, please. At that too. It's called El Mariachi. OK. Yeah. Mustacula. Half off on Mondays. What are you going to get? Don Julio Margarita's half off. Oh, I'm going to get it. Don Julio Margarita's half off. Oh, ayayay. Yes. Do you do a skinny with salt? I just don't. I don't like the skinny. I do. You do the skinny with salt. I do the skinny with salt. I don't like the skinny. I don't like the agave. I don't like the taste of it. Where is El Mariachi? I feel like I've heard of it. It's on Ventura Boulevard. Never heard of it. Shane, have we not been there? I don't think so. What's the cross street? Going to be full of chumps right now. It's right, I don't know. Haskell. Yeah, Haskell, there you go. What time are you going and who are you going with? Well, I don't know, right? Usually, John and I go on Mondays together. We love John. Because usually, we don't see each other on the weekends. But now, he is in Puerto Rico. Never heard of it. Never heard. And so he is. That's fine. What's he doing in Puerto Rico? I want to go to Puerto Rico. He's at the World Baseball Classics. That's fine. Watching baseball. My friend went and saw Bad Bunny in Puerto Rico recently and had the best time. Bad Bunny at the Super Bowl. Killed it at the Super Bowl. Killed it at the Super Bowl. Way to one up. It was incredible. It was amazing. It was amazing. Yeah. Jeff, do you want to be on the show today or are you just going to look at Google Maps? Honestly, I'm just looking at where El Mariachi is. I'm trying to understand exactly where it is. It's OK. It's across from the McDonald's. I love McDonald's. Oh, so it's west of the 405. There you go. OK. Maybe that's why we didn't go. What's your goat? It's by the Cazuya. Oh. Over there. What's your go-to order? Like, are you a tacos guy or an enchilada guy? I will do the fajitas, but I hold the onions and the peppers. I just do chicken and tomatoes. Hot. But then I put beans and rice and cheese and roll it up in a burrito. OK. Can I just say I remember when Chili's like first hit Rhode Island. I mean, that's like a birthday. That when they come out with that sizzling platter. So sizzling. It's still so good. I have some good, well, kind of good news from you for you. I'm hoping because you and I loved a soup plantation. Yes. Yes. It is something. It's kind of like a knockoff of soup plantation called Soup and Fresh. Where? Stop it. Here's the problem. It hasn't traveled far enough west for us yet. It's in Rancho Cucamonga. OK. And it's also, they opened a location in Chino Hills. Have you gone? Not yet because it's 65 minute drive. I looked. I'll go with you. But they have a, they do have a senior citizen menu, 55 and up. Oh, good. We, I, it's $2 off. OK. But you eat for like $17 or something like that. Oh, so adults lunch is $17.99, but the senior menu is $15.99. OK. Dinner is $19.99, but the senior is $17.99. Here's the thing. The drinks are expensive. It's like four bucks. OK. But you can go back as many times as you want. Pitch. We go for lunch. Stay. Eat our way through. Stay through dinner. They can't prove. They don't know when we got there. But you know what? I wonder if it's the same company because they, they had something. If you remember, they had wonton happiness, but now they've changed it to Asian chicken salad, but it's the same thing. Yeah, they know. Yeah. So is it like a, is it a buffet? Yes. Wait, wait. Have you not been to soup? Oh, I've been to soup plantation. This is like a soup plantation. Yeah. My mom used to wrap up the cornbread and napkins with the honey whip butter and just stick it in her purse. I forgot about the honey whipped butter. And the corn muffins had the actual corn chunks in it. Yes. They had the corn chunks and then the weird like school cafeteria pizza, which like in the squares, which is like, I loved it too. It was soggy. I loved it. Yeah. When we go also don't get confused because it, it formerly was called the Senate bean with smoked ham soup. Now there's calling it chili. Okay. It's the same thing. It doesn't matter. And they still have pizza bread. Okay. But that's what it is. It's pizza bread. So here's my, like, I'm also not afraid. When I eat, it's like a woodchuck. Okay. So things are going to be flying. You're, there's going to be, you're going to be like, art and there's iceberg in your hair. That's okay. I get so frenzied and excited and I'm going to be up and down. I'm going to be refilling. Same. I'm going to have probably about nine different plates. Same. Same. But I do a sample platter first. What do you mean? So I'll just sample everything a little bit and then I'm going to go back for more of what I like. So do you start, do you start salad? So you, so you taste it. You're not wasteful. You're like, I do like the former wanton, nay wanton, now, now Asian chicken. I'm just going to go ahead and call it by its true name, which is wanton happiness. Obviously. I love wanton happiness. That's the name of my first born son. Okay. That's really exciting. And then they'll have the ice cream and then they'll have the jello and then the cakes. But I'm going to start with the salad. Is there a franchise opportunity? We're not. Is there a franchise opportunity for us to get one closer? I literally have my hair, my hairy arms are standing up. I know I'm not just a pretty face. You are absolutely right. We should. That's right. I think it would kill. It would kill. What if we did sort of like a bougie, like you do, we do like a bougie fun thing. I think the four of us would keep it in business. What should we call it? On our own. Yes. Oh my God. That's fun. Yeah. I would call it chili. Can you look up soup and fresh? Chili. Is it a franchise? Would we, I think we start in the valley. There are two of them. So. Yeah, that's a franchise. It could be privately owned. Okay. We're in the valley. We're closed on Mondays though, because I already have plans. Yeah. Do we do like Studio City? What part of the valley do we do? Do we do Shokes? German Oaks. Yeah. The Hamlet of Encino. Where all the families are, right? So Studio City or the Shokes? We could do Woodland Hills. You could do Tarzana. You could do all, you could do Tarzana. You could do, uh, Woodland Hills is a good idea. I think that's where we expand. We start and we just keep going up the 101. Near where the hugos is, near where like the Paramount Ranch used to be, near up there. We start there and then we, like Kardashian adjace it and then we calm down. Who doesn't want to go to Soup and Fresh? I literally feel crazy now that my, my, if you look, my hairy arms are standing up on it. When I get excited, it's standing up. They're not that hairy. You're not as hairy as Sarah's. They're blonde. Why not hairy? Are they? No, you're not hairy. They're exciting. They're exciting. That's exciting. I know. There's a couple posts. There's posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts posts five stars on Google. Okay, 4.3. I like them every day. It's a lot of waste, I think. My dad used to own a grocery store and there was a lot of waste and there's like expiration dates and spoiled food. But we'll do whatever. But we can get the leftovers. To who? To homeless shelters. But it's waste on like- That's nice. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like we do whatever other restaurant does. When something is going, when something is about to go bad, I think we do like specials or something. Yes, yes, yes. Chef's favorite. It's like when bars start a closing and then they'd have a stand up night. Do you remember that? Like if a bar was going out of business, their last shot would be a night of stand up comedy. You know what? There's one that's doing that now. Yeah, it'll be closed in a week. It'll be closed in a week. Exactly, get your eulogy ready. Have you ever been to a hometown buffet? Is that, do they do those? Or is that just Southern? I don't know if that's upscale. They're not a salad. Oh, they have Salisbury steak. I mean, I love that. I'm not gonna lie. Oh, I don't know. That doesn't sound good to me. Oh, all right. They have well-share bits. Okay, I'll go by myself. I think it's more elevated soup and fresh. Because soup and fresh can make you feel like you're on a diet, even though you're eating your weight in roughage pizza and ice cream. Right, because you put cheese on your salad. Because you can start with a big pile of veggies and then you just dive in. Hometown buffet does not have wanton happiness. No, but they have other stuff. Like I said, Salisbury steak and that's all I can remember right now. When I watched the Harrison Ford speech at the SAG Awards, all I could think was suplementation streams, suplementation, I tried to explain what it was to Harrison Ford and he like blacked out. Wait, what? I, okay, okay, so. You were talking to Harrison Ford about suplementation? I did. I was in morning glory and he was so sweet, but he's Harrison Ford, so I kind of left him alone. So it was like, it took place like at a morning show and in between takes, I was sitting between Harrison Ford and Diane Keaton and somehow it came up that I love, it's all I talk about really, I love it. It's a good conversation starter. It's a 10 minute, it's a nice work. This is my Tourette's, this is so liberally. Do you know what I said? Turns out Diane Keaton claimed to love suplementation, although I find it hard to believe that she would have ever gone, but she seemed to really perk up. You can't, if you've been there, you're gonna love it. So we got excited, we started talking about suplementation and then all of a sudden Harrison Ford like sort of wakes up and goes, what is suplementation? And then Annie Hall completely bails on me. I'm talking to like, you know, frickin', what's his name from, I mean, Indiana Jones. Yeah, about suplementation of all things. I'm like, well, it's like an all you can eat buffet, but they have salad and ice cream and I can see his eyes glazing over. She peased out, she completely bailed on me. And I was stuck and I lost him at all you can eat buffet. He doesn't need... Does your publicist ever say ardent? Stop talking about suplementation. Could you please just promote the TV show? No, she knows that my goal is just to own a suplementation because I said no. This is all... Soup and fresh. Soup and fresh. Soup and Jeff. Jeff and fresh. Salus is, we can workshop it, it still in the works. Now that you're on this hit TV show, well, you've been on many hit TV shows, but Free Bird's doing really well, it's on Netflix. You can view it now, all six episodes are streaming. Yes. You still, so you've got, I saw pictures, a very nice home that you remodeled yourself. You were the general contractor, you hired all the subs. Yes. You acted as the general contractor. I was a designer and I was the general contractor. You also have this guest house. Yes. You have turned into an income stream where you will Airbnb the guest house. Yeah, I'm a hotelier. Now, but people contact you directly, right? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Okay, all right. So you have someone handling it. No, look, I was married when I bought this house. I'm a divorcee, don't be scandalized, I'm the only one in Los Angeles. When I bought this house, that my ex-husband used to like run hotels and he was like, we should get a place and have an Airbnb. So my mind, I'm never dealing with this thing. Lo and behold, I got divorced and now I'm like, oh man, but I built it where basically I never meet anyone. I don't think it's me. Like it's like, it's been great. It's got its own entrance. It has its own entrance. I don't ever see anybody and they come for like 30 days at a time. However, Kian told me that fresh, fresh off the divorce, you hooked up with one of your Airbnb tenants. The first person I kissed ever after my marriage was an Airbnb guest. Yeah. Yeah. Ah! Oh, sorry, I got excited. It's a true story. By the way, I very rarely meet Airbnb guests. I had gone on my very first date earlier that day. We went for tacos. I was nervous cause it was like- Was it a Monday? It was a Monday. It was with Sarah Clon. That's how we met. We met on Ryan and then it didn't work out for us. Like here we are. We met, yeah, she wouldn't let me get the skinny margarita. No, we went for tacos. And I was like just freaked out. I was all dressed up cause I was nervous. I remember calling my friend. I was going on my first date. It was just so crazy to not be on a date with my ex-husband. And then I got home and I got this message that was like, hey Art, and it's me, Jeff. Like, you know, it's supposed to be Jeff and Sarah checking in. Well, now it's just Jeff. Sarah and I broke up. I'm like, oh. So then I was like, let me help you into the guest house. And then he was hot. And I'm like, oh. And I was all, I'm like, hello. And then I invited him for drinks in the backyard. And the first- The same day? He came like a couple of days later and he was there for a month, but by a terrible idea. It was a terrible idea cause he was still there for like 30 more days. So like we made out like night three. He didn't like touch my boobs or anything which was kind of disappointing. But I know, I know cause he had just broken up with his long-term girlfriend that he was supposed to be checking in with. And but my first kiss outside of my marriage was with my Airbnb guest. That's fun. And you didn't end up dating? No. Oh, okay. Is this an Airbnb or a brothel? Look, I mean, look, I will say Airbnb is the worst of the dating apps. It's like, it's bad. It's bad cause they can review you afterwards. It's not good. Yeah, that was, I did. That's who I made out with. So I think he probably didn't sleep with you not because you're not hot. He didn't. I think what happened was he probably knew he was gonna get back together with Sarah. I think he hit, yeah, he hit some quirks. He hit some quirks. What kind of quirks? I think it was like, I think he would order Jersey Mike's every night and just cry. Okay, same. Quirk, by the way. Relatable. It's kind of a boner killer. Yeah, so what was his quirk? I mean, honestly, perfect man. Did you know he was crying? He told me that he would just sob and order Jersey Mike's every night. I mean, I had never had Jersey Mike's and now I've had it's really good. It is good. It is good. I mean, he's not crying over Jersey Mike's. It's really good Mike's way. But yeah, that was my, and then I invited him. I'm sorry, did he just say to you like, oh, I just finished crying. He was like, I, he would text me that he's like, I'm sobbing every night. And then I invited him to my birthday party and we made out like in my little podcast studio that he helped me set it up and then he hit on one of my friends in front of me at my party. And then everyone was like, I miss him. Yeah, exactly. He was an iconic character. Wow. Where are you, you're in the East Side, right? Silver Lake area. Silver Lake. Got it, got it. Okay. Do you want to come right my house? I'll send you the link. So what was, we'll say his name is Jeff. What was Jeff doing there for 30 days without Sarah? Jeff was there, like, I think he was running a production on a commercial. He was like doing, he had like a production company. And again, if you're gonna, note to any Airbnb hosts who recently divorced out of a pandemic looking to get back on the dating scene, maybe wait until like day 27. Don't start at day three if they're a long-term guest. The timing wasn't right. It was too early in the visit. Did he get back together with his girlfriend? No, but he did marry like a celebrity. I think he was a bit of a star. He already got married? I think he was like a star effort. Well, that was like six years ago. Oh, okay, well, yeah. So he married a celebrity? Yeah, and the person he hit on at my party was a celebrity. I think he was there. I think he really liked Raya. I think he really liked Raya. And so can you tell us who he got married to? No, but I'll tell you afterwards. I'll tell you afterwards. I think if you had free bird at the time, he would have proposed. Yeah, he would have. He would at least touch the boob. Because you weren't a leading lady then. I wasn't a leading lady. No, you are. Exactly. I was only like number seven on the call sheet. I've moved up to two. I think it was that. I agree with you. I think it was that. You would have put the B in the Airbnb. He does still check my stories all the time. He does still look at my stories all the time. He's a fan. He's a fan. You're the one that got away. I'm the one. Because I've moved up to leading lady status. He blew it. Do you still follow him back on Instagram? And we already follow. Yeah. So OK, Cedar can't just unfollow? No, no, it's fun to see. It's fun to watch. I mean, this is not for me, the one that got away. It's more just like we're all upset. We call him Airbnb. And it's just fun to watch Airbnb make choices. Does he follow Jersey Mike's on Instagram too? You know what he should? I had Jersey Mike's two days ago. It was delicious. You know you need to try. What was the one you introduced me to? You didn't really introduce. No, Pickle. Mr. Pickles. Mr. Pickles. What's that? Oh, it's a really good sandwich. Do they put Pickles on the sandwiches? Oh, yes. Sorry. I'm excited. Wouldn't that be good? Yes. Well, I mean, I think. Wouldn't that be good? I love Pickles. I think a lot of places put Pickles on their sandwiches. I mean, like McDonald's, Icon Star. Yeah. Wait, what is Mr. Pickles? It's a really wonderful sandwich place. What's their number one on the call sheet? I forget. I can't remember the name of it. We look at Mr. Pickles. Where is it? What neighborhood? I'm not sure. She doesn't even know. She doesn't know cross streets. Is it a franchise or a one and done? That's a good question. Is it a franchise or a one and done? Listen, I don't. Franchise. There's Van Nuys. Work for the floor. What do you order from Mr. Pickles? I don't know. I just can't. Turkey, I think. Turkey sandwich. Oh my god, look at it. Look at how good the bread looks. Jeff ate half of one out of my refrigerator that was meant for a guest. At her holiday party. If you were there, I would have shared it with you. Yeah. I know. But you weren't there. I know. But guess what? I will be there this year. Really? If you're invited. She's always inviting. Will you come to mind? You should bring Airbnb. Oh my god. Ruin a marriage. Ruin a marriage. I'm going to have Jersey Mike's cater it. Are you going to? Yeah, we're all going to cry. Oh my god. We could have a cry circle. A holiday cry circle. Just like a holiday is in New England. Actually, you've got to push it down. I'm very, very serious about this. Is there any way that you can order Mr. Pickles that day? So later in the evening when I get hungry and the food's put away, I can have a Mr. Pickles. That's a good idea. Sure. I'll split it with you, Arnie. Yes, I'd like that. What are we going to get? I mean, to be fair, the food wasn't put away when you went in. What do you want? Which one do you want? What do we want? I'm fine with turkey. I'm fine with I could do roast beef. I could do that. I could do that, too. What's your favorite? I mean, honestly, as long as there's cheese and some mustard, I'll eat anything. Yeah. Legit. I'll eat anything. I also love like, I'm not mad at a steak and cheese, you know? Like a little, I'm not mad. It's hard. I'm not mad at a Philly cheese steak. I'm not mad at it like in the, but it's hard in the fridge. We would have to have it fresh, but I still would eat it soggy. So how do you stay so thin? Do you like eat and then don't eat for a couple of days? No, I always eat. I always eat. She's very active. I play tennis. I run around the reservoir and then I do, I do the same day Instagram workout. This guy during the pandemic started doing workouts. Is it Isaac Booth? Yes, but I do July 8th, 2021 every day, where he yells, and he yells at all the viewers and he, and it's, I could do it. I could do it along with him. Is he the butt guy? Yes. I heard about him. You know who else does that and has a great body is Carly, Carly Hughes. And, oh yes. Yeah. And Lisa Renda does them and he goes and he screams on, is July 8th, 2021. And he goes, welcome to the music business, honey. And he's like, and he's busy freeloading that day. He's in the Hamptons freeloading from somebody and yelling at his host. And, and then he's like, this is the Hamptons, not Nantucket. Lisa Rigauchi and Nantucket, honey. Like it's the only day I do. Okay. Can you share it to your story? So we can all do it. Yes. How long is it? 30 minutes. That's why I do it. Okay. And you could do it in a hotel room. You could use water bottles to workout. Wow. What is this guy's name? I think Booth is, is, is yes. Remember from the pandemic. Yeah. I do remember him. That's what I do. Okay. Now, House Mittens. Oh my God. Thank you so much for asking. Mittens is really good. Mittens, um, Mittens. She was on the makeup case this morning when I was, she put my weave in. Mittens clipped in my weave. Mittens put on my falsies. Her thumbs are iconic. Mittens is very flirty. Mittens is, is my best friend. The one thing that I got worried is that you posted your beautiful cap, Mittens. But if you really, really focus in on the picture. You can see my address. You could see the tag. Yes. With your phone number. Text me. And your address. Text me. Add your address. Great. Text her for an Airbnb. Were you trying to promote the Airbnb? I was, that was just to let Airbnb know that my information has not changed. And then underneath it says, let me know if you want it. I know, I would forgive you for hitting on my friend. I know you just married another celebrity. I'm now a leading lady. It's all on Mittens tag. Did anyone text you? Oh, here's Isaac Boots. Here's Isaac Boots. Miss Susan herself. There. There we go. It froze. Yep. Yeah. So Mittens is great. Mittens is, Mittens. And Sarah has a new cat that looks like Mittens, but doesn't have thumbs. It's looking for a home. Yes. Her name is Dolly. Another new cat? Dolly needs a home. I just rescued her. She's in my best room. And she's so cute. Do you have four now? Well, we're not keeping her. I think Shane and Brogan want a cat, right? You just, I was thinking, oh. No, you can't do that now. OK. We're about to do construction. What's he going to do? Well, do you want to? I mean, put on a hard hat and give him a level. If any listeners are looking for a cat, her name is Dolly. She's really cute. She's so cute. She's a year old. But she's petite too. So if you want, yeah. She lets me wrap her belly already. She's like a child star. You just keep her small. Yeah, she's so cute. She's really cute. I think for some reason I thought of you guys this morning when I was looking at her. I do think you want her. She's cute. Show me a picture. You like cats. Yeah. I love kittens. Are you ready to be a dad? Look at the picture of this. I'll show them at. I'll show them at. OK. Do you know that Sarah has an Instagram now for her cats? Yeah. And it got a lot of followers when you announced it the other day and made fun of me. Feliz Navi Paws. Oh, that's a good. She's got a thousand followers now. That's a lot. Yeah. For cats. That's a lot. It's a lot for cats who don't fucking do anything. I feel that Mittens was the gateway drug for John Ryan. She was. She was because he didn't want cats. And then when he met her in Atlanta, he was like, well, cats are pretty cute. I followed Feliz Navi Paws. And now when I look at Sarah's posts, I can see that they all say liked by Feliz Navi Paws. Oh, she likes her own. Oh, do I? She likes her own. Wow. She likes her own posts. You know how do I do that? That's iconic. That's iconic. Wow. I know I made an account. No, now I think that's because John, because sometimes he's on there. So he's probably, he doesn't really know how to use Instagram. So he's probably liking it from there. That's a good cover. Yeah. No, I don't know what your affiliation is with Cow Pack, but you say that there's a little bit of a commission when people buy it and it goes to charity. Yes, they donate it to the food bank. That's a good one. So now you ordered a Cow Pack. I did. I ordered the Sarah Colonial Special. I got the pack and the bag, but I got it and I feel like it's not big enough. I want to send it back. Like the roller bag is smaller than the carry-on that I have. It's not. They're the rights that's the only size you can carry on. I do like Cow Pack. I do like it. I do like it. Did you order the main one? Yeah, I like a Cow Pack. But I do the insert. You know, like I put on my makeup and stuff in the Cow Pack. I've had some like backpacks. I've had some. It's pinned on my reels. I get a lot of questions from Trump. It's pinned on my reels and you can see what I use from that. You don't think that it's enough room for all of your clothes and shoes? It seems small. It seems small. I do do weigh luggage like the large one, the expandable. But then I put Cow Pack. Like there's like I do some. I have the cubes. The cubes and stuff. I didn't know there was cubes. There's cubes, honey. And I could put the cubes in my way back. Agree to agree. Or in your Cow Pack. Or you can. Yeah, I told Shane then he ordered it. But now he doesn't have to wash his underwear in the cure egg because he has enough room for extra care of underwear. I saw that. I'm so glad. I know. Tell Arden what happened. A lady on TikTok did a video of a hack that she said that if you run out of clean underwear when you're traveling, you wash him in the coffee pot machine in the hotel. And she did it in the cure. And she put it in there and ran her dirty panties in the coffee maker in a coffee maker in a hotel. And the hotel is suing her? I think so. Can you look it up? Somebody's suing her. I saw that. That grosses me out. She's disgusting. There was a guy. There was a really long line. There was a really long line at the Starbucks in the hotel that I was in this weekend. Really long because there was like a volleyball tournament happening. And so I said, oh, I'm going to get out of this line and go get a coffee just at the regular restaurant. And this guy behind me goes, I'm just going to make one in my hotel room. And I said, no, you're not. I said, don't fucking do it. Yeah. I said, people wash their panties in that. And he said, what are you talking about? He said, ma'am, have we met? I said, Google it. And next thing I know, he's following me over to the restaurant. Wait a minute. I always use that. How many likes and views did she have on that? Because I guarantee she probably led a whole bunch of morons doing the same thing. Oh, I'm sure. You're right. I'm never using those again. No. I'm never using those again. I always use that. You've got to order the fresh coffee from the room servants. This is right. This is giving clickbait. So now in response to the video, she said, I've never actually done that, but it's really funny, you guys. Oh, no, no. She's backing down. She did it on camera. She's showing herself doing it. Yeah, we saw her do it. She's backing down because she's getting soon. Yes. Yeah. She's backing down. Backtracking. That's such a disgusting thought. Literally, I posted about it. And then the next day I saw Chris Frangola was making a coffee in his hotel. I said, did you not see this? He said, yeah, I don't care. I love Chris. He doesn't care. He said he didn't care. He said, some people would pay good money. I love her panty coffee. Is the hotel suing her? I can't find anything on a lawsuit. You guys. Yeah, somebody sent me, somebody sent it to me, the article. That's so gross. It's disgusting. It's really gross. People are garbage. They are. I mean, like I've been gross, but not like that. The lie detector determined you're telling the truth. So how are you getting everything in that cow pack? Are you wearing the same shit over and over? Can I see you now? I don't want to see it. It's just a regular carry-on. And then the Luca Duffel, which is a huge duffel that fits under your seat. I think I want to keep that up. I packed for 12 days in Europe with these two items. I'll carry on. Just don't believe you. The Luca Duffel I do have, you have to get in the extra large. It's a basically this size. The regular size actually is a personal size item that go under your. I put it as a personal and they let me carry it on. But I don't put it. But it's so large, it's like the size of another carry-on. That's why you can go on it. Did you only bring one pair of shoes to Europe? No, I wore a pair of sneakers on the plane. I wore and then I brought a pair of boots that I could do day and night. I brought a pair of heels because it was a wedding. How did you have fun? Because I'm a good packer. I've done three weeks in a carry-on. It was hell. I didn't feel good about it, but I did it. We had to because we were taking all these trains in Europe and I didn't want to be hauling a big bag around. Are you a very good packer? I'm a great packer. I'm a fan. That's what I'm saying. I can't believe you're not a Virgo. No. You know what I found out the other weekend? I think that was you. What? My nephew works in islands. Yeah. What? I was talking to him about it. That's hot. Yeah. What does he do? Let's go. I think he's a waiter, right? Yeah. I love islands. I have a bunch of gift cards. So do I. Yeah, I got from a chump. A chump sent him. Let's go. I love islands. Yeah, that's where I'm going to take you on our dinner date. Oh, let's do it. Let's meet at islands. Yeah. Do you want to come? Yes. No. But you know what? Do you know what my nephew said? What? He said that everybody's pissed because they eliminated the bottomless fries. Oh. People have been complaining. I love fries. I love fries. But you know what? You can't do anything bottomless anymore. Like the Red Lobster did bottomless shrimp and then all the shrimp disappeared. You'll go broke. Yeah, you can't do it. People take too far. I was downtown at a theater this weekend and they had bottomless popcorn. Seriously? I love that. That makes sense, though. That's smart because how much popcorn can you eat? And it's cheaper. After you have half the thing, you're like, I can't possibly have popcorn. But look at you. You like yourself. You know what I mean? You can eat a lot of popcorn. You don't eat a lot of popcorn. You think that Airbnb guy eats popcorn and cries? I mean, when he thinks about you? When he watches Free Bird. Oh my god. You know what? He really hurt my feelings at my birthday party. So if one night, I don't wish him forever. I wish him well. He didn't have to take a divorcee host of his Airbnb on. However, don't hit on my friend and my party. No, who did he hit on? Can you tell us that? Is she more famous than you? At the time, yes. But not anymore? I think we're equal. Oh. I love a leading lady, Arden. I like that. Arden is giving leading lady energy today. You know what? He really hurt my feelings. And it bothered me that she knew that we were together and they went on a date. Oh, she did? Yes. Oh, I thought it was not a good question. So that's why I'm getting a little sassy. And then she got eliminated from the list, from the birthday list. Yeah, she did. Because she hurt my feelings. Because she knew. That's fucked up. It is fucked up. I didn't have a lot of confidence. I was coming out. I was feeling tender. Tender, really? Do you now? Yeah. OK, good. You should. Yeah, I do. Yeah. I like myself now. But I was like, you know, I hadn't been on a date in a long time. And you're vulnerable. You feel like, you know. I just thought he hit on her. I didn't know that she actually was separated. No, they went on a date. They went on a date. That's bullshit. It is. It's not nice. You're still friends with her? No, she's off the list. You're going to tell us after the break. Yeah, yeah. You're going to tell us who it is. Oh, I want to hear. Invite her to the holiday party. Oh, yeah. It was Middends. I mean, you're going to have to stir up some shit again this year, like you did last year. Yeah, yeah, you know, Miss. I do need someone to go to Margaret and Margaret on Monday with today. Middends. If she's available. Yeah. Miners will double trouble there. Indeed presents. Hires you can't afford to get wrong. Like a warehouse operations manager. Uh, where are the forklifts? I sold them. They were too expensive. I got a great deal on these scooters, though. You expect us to move a two-ton pallet on a scooter. It'll be fun. Just think of the core strength you'll build. This is a job for sponsored jobs. This is what happens when you don't sponsor your job on Indeed. So the next time you need someone to get the job done right, get matched with quality candidates with an Indeed sponsored job. Visit Indeed.com slash Next hire and sponsor your job today. Switch to Plusnet's award-winning full fibre from just $22.99 a month. Our sweet deal gets you fast and reliable broadband with no activation fee, with speeds up to 900 megabits. Ooh, feels like a sugar rush. Full fibre that's full of value. That's a plus. Offer ends 6th of May. 24 months, 26.99 from the 31st of March, 2027. 30.99 from the 31st of March, 2028. New customers only 62% UK availability. Terms apply. Kylie and Texas line one. Hi, Kylie. Hi, shout out, champs. Shout out, Kylie. Five a random story regarding the coffee pots and hotels. My husband was on a business trip. And woke up in the morning, like 5 a.m., had a cup of coffee, started like feeling amazing. He's texting all of his coworkers, like in all caps, saying like, dominate your day. Like, today's gonna be amazing. He sends my daughter, like, to the best volleyball player ever, like freaking out. A couple hours later, he gets in the shower, gets out, his eyes are like pitch-flack. And long story short, he opens up the coffee maker and there was a baggy that had liquefied into his coffee that I think he was on Molly all morning. I can't tell all the meetings before you. I like crazy. Oh my God. That's the best scenario of what it could be. Oh, that's the money. Wow. But see, now the hotel should be checking those machines, right, because now the hotel is liable. Yeah, that's wild. They should be cleaning them out between guests. Well, I bet I'm guessing someone probably put it there thinking they were hiding it. Yes. Don't you think? And then they got it. Right. Yes. But then they should be cleaning between guests. Yes, they should. Ideally. They should either open it and find a pair of underwear. What hotel was it, Kylie? Do you remember? It was a Marriott in Houston. Oh, totally makes sense. That tracks. Right, right. That's what I'm saying, Kylie. The Western would not do that. Oh my God. Totally. How long was he high? Oh my God. So he canceled. He had an appointment. He got a dune and one. He canceled both of those. He said he drank like 12 bottles of water and orange juice and finally by four, he was feeling fine. Like it was terrible. Wow. I would check the coffee maker here, Sierra 6n. I put some molly in earlier. Yeah, drink it. Wow, don't worry, the molly's here. Thank you, Kylie. Wow. You need to check that before you make me my coffee in the morning. I remember when I was working at this bar called Formosa. You remember Formosa Cafe? Yes. Yeah, I worked there for a long time. And when we were cleaning one night, one of my coworkers found a white baggie underneath one of the booths. And he said, should I take this? And I said, no, you don't want to take. He took it. He snorted it and it was up for four days. Wow. Yeah. Wait, is Formosa the one on the north side of the street? Which one is Jones? Jones. Jones is on north. OK, OK. Yeah. Formosa's on the north or south? South. Jones is on north. Got it. OK, Santa Monica, right? Yeah. OK. Oh my god, that's where we could or we could open our soup and fresh. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's not a bad idea. That breakfast place is so bad. Because it also be close. Like we could go there. You know what I mean? I'm going to push for the valley just because I think that's more. Yeah, you're right. You're right. But you need a very big footprint. I think you should do it at the Beverly Center. And we need back to basics. Well, by the way, well, by the way, connection, connect, the connect. Back to basics. But people aren't going to go park there. I mean, I, I, I love the Beverly connection. Don't get me wrong, obviously. I'm sophisticated. But I think you're right. I think it's the valley. You need parking. The parking is intimidating. You need parking. You need a lot and not like a major structure. And ours can have a bar. I think ours should have a bar. We got to get liquor licensed. Yeah, it might be harder to get liquor licensed than Sarah. I can get one. Wine and beer. Wow. I'm, I got excited again just thinking about our franchise. Now, is it true that when Keen was interviewing you, your doorbell rang. And a strange man came to your door. Would you open the door to him? Clutching a baby. What? Was it a real baby? Yeah, I was like, oh, this is how I die. I thought he's, this is a fake baby. He like, this is part of the plan. There was a, and I thought this is a perfect thing. You're going to open it. Somebody walks up holding a baby. You're going to open the door. Yeah. This is how, I kept calling on my murderer to his face. I was like, you're my. I was like, oh, she's opening, she's opening the door. I opened it because he had a baby. But I said to him like, oh, you're my murderer. And then. Yeah, you said that right off the bat. I did. I was like, it's my murder. So in front of the child's dad. But they didn't murder me. What did he want? He wanted a phone charger because he had a Tesla. And his phone died. He couldn't get into his car. I think he didn't murder you because you were on the phone with Ken. Yeah. I agree with you. I actually thought, thank God I'm on the phone. Because his plan of murder me got, I had a, I was saying, and I said, there's a man here with a baby. When I get murdered, that's who did it. And I think if, if I would not be here today. So did he come into your home to charge his phone? No, I didn't let him in. I had an outside plug. But I did open the door. I didn't lock it in front of him when I went and got the charger. He could have come and murdered me then. This is all very unsafe. And. Did you get your charger back? He did give it back. He rang the door again. I said, here's my murderer again. And then he in the baby. Wait, all, he charges phone that fast when you were on the phone with Ken. That doesn't make any sense. You're the fast charger. It was just enough to get the car unlocked. He only needs a minute of charging to. Because then he could plug it in the car. Yeah, just to get, just, then he could plug it in the car. Just to get the car like. Yeah, I. Christ, I'm sorry. Sorry, plug it in the car. Good to know technology works, Sarah. Wow. I did think if I wanted to like be an assassin, borrowing a baby would be a good tactic. You've got mittens. Oh my God, you're really. I would open the door to mittens. I would too. Yeah. You know what? Isn't mittens so cute? So cute. Oh, is she here? Where is she? Where is she? Where is she hiding? Where is she hiding? I would open the door. If you were standing in front of my door with little mittens. Yeah, I would open the door. I do want you to stop opening your door for. Don't you have a gate? For just. I did. It's not normally open, but I don't know. I don't know. I feel like you're putting your phone number on Instagram and opening your door. I have an Airbnb, all of it. I'm just really tempting. I want you to button it up a little bit. Look, I hope this episode is not part of a future date line. I really do. I hope the date of play this back. Have they given you season two yet on? Not yet. No, not yet. I feel like there's room. Like it's like it's like looking positive. I don't know. Hopefully, yeah. God, Sheila and Denver. Line one. I'm not even going to look. Surprise me. Surprise. Hi, Sheila. Good morning. Shout out, Shane. Shout out, Sheila. Is this a fact, Sheila? Thank you. Yes. Oh my God, surprise me. Somebody. Tell me. Tell me. One more disgusting hotel coffee pot story. And then we should never talk about this again. OK, OK, OK, OK. But, OK. So I heard this on another radio show. This was years ago. And a former hotel maid called in to talk about how their cleaning protocols were not very good. And I don't remember the chain that she worked for. But anyway, they would start in the bathroom and kind of clean their way out of the room. So the bathroom's the first thing they clean. OK. The same cleaning rag that they would use in the bathroom, including on the toilet, was then used to wipe out the coffee pot. And probably the ice maker and probably the glasses. Probably everything. Yeah, everything. Someone DM'd to see this. I got a lot of weird DMs after talking about this the other day. But someone DM'd me the same story. Said she saw it. Said she saw the lady right in front of her wiping everything down with the same rag. Yeah. I can confirm that that's what they used to do. I used to work at a hotel as a handyman. Why are you just now speaking up? When? Where? Give us an info. It was at the Marriott. I knew it. I knew it. How is this just coming out? How old were you? God, I don't know. 13. Let me see. This got to be two, three years after high school. Anywho, I was a handyman for a little while. And they would use the same one rag and they'll clean the surface of everything. And then, yeah. Oh, also. I think it's important to clarify we're not saying all Marriott housekeeping staff uses the same rag. No. That's what I meant. I believe it. No, we're from Marriott and my family. John's Titanium at Marriott. Oh, that's nice. So I believe it because he said anywho. And that actually made it feel real. Yeah. I think that the anywho of it all felt real. I'm not buying. He was a handyman at 13. I know not. I said 13. I said 13. I didn't say 13. He said two years after high school. What kind of shit do you fix? Oh, I would go around. There was not much to fix. It was a small hotel. I could show you. No, seriously, he won't make eye contact. Every time he says a fact. Let me tell you something. Why would you make it up? Why would you make it up? I'm looking at you in the eyes, Annie, when I tell you this. Well, that's the hardest thing you fix. Oscar's a little upset. Because Annie just called him out. He's getting a look. I like it when you're mad. All she's saying is that she's noticed when you lie, you don't make eye contact. I like it when he tells facts. Well, let me tell you something, Annie. If you're in a hotel room, if there's something that you use or maybe you don't use, if we go in there and it looks like it's not used, we won't clean it. Oh, that's a cute dress, Annie. It is cute. It's vintage Kate Spade. Where'd you get it? Kate Spade. I actually got it for my mom for Mother's Day when I was like 13 and I was like, I'm going to get that one in Mulder and I took it. Wow. It looks so good on you. It looks so nice. Who knew then it was going to look good on you today? We should describe it. It's a white dress, but it almost has like a button up top. It's got cute sleeves and a clothing. It's like lace. It's on my Instagram, actually. You can go check it out at any type underscore. Where did you grow up? Where did you grow up? Dallas. There you go. In New England, everybody in my town just wears corduroy and clears brush with their hands. You're like a hooker if you were in mascara. Before we go to a break, I just want to for one. I believe that Oscar is lying. What do you think? No, I think he worked at a hotel. Sarah? I believe him for where I just don't think he would make it up. I did believe him. I don't know if he was good at fixing things, but I believe he was employed there for at some point. You do. Can you just give us some of what you did? Annie, do you think he's telling the truth? I really don't. Check out Free Bird on Netflix. It's six episodes. You could stream it now. I think I watched at five last night. I'm almost done. It's fun, right? It's fun. It's quick. It's funny. It's a reverent. It's edgy. Yes. I like that. Me too. Also, you have live events coming up. Sarah Colona. Yes, come see me in Appleton, Wisconsin, the 26th or the 28th of March, April 10th and 11th in Arlington, Virginia. I'll add some more summer dates, but then August 3rd, 3rd, 9th in Vegas, September 24th through 26th Batavia, Illinois, sarahcolona.com. Yeah, girl. Follow Felice Navi Paws. Oh, yeah. Oh, and Dolly. The last time you were here, you went on a date. And you actually went on a little weekend trip and you took Mittens videos, right? I brought Mittens. I brought Mittens. Are you still seeing the guy? I am. I'm still seeing him. Oh. Yeah, yeah. So it's going well. It's going well. Is he in your Airbnb yet? We met in my Airbnb. Yeah, he's the guy that came up with the baby to murder me. It's going well. It's been like six months. Are you sure he's not a star fucker? Because you know, you are on a hit show. I don't think he's a star fucker. OK. Yeah. What does he do? He's an adult man like in business. He's like a businessman. And he doesn't have a secret headshot. Perfect. OK, good. That's hard in Los Angeles. Yes. Like everybody. What kind of business? Does he want to invest in our? He's a businessman. He's a businessman. He's a businessman. I'm just saying, we need someone in the business side. We do. Is that what he tells you? Because it's a very broad. Yeah. Well, I met him when he walked up with the baby. No, I think that like, yeah, he's funny and kind. And like, he's like, so far I like him. OK. I'm going slow and steady to make sure that, but like, so far I like him. And he likes Mittens. Does he spend the night? Yeah. OK, often. Often. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. How often do you guys have sex? When we're together, it's good. Yeah. OK, good. So, so, but, you know, I don't get like, you know, like it's like, you know, he's out of town right now. But like. On business? He's on business. Yes, he's a businessman. It's Willie Lohman. Yeah, yeah, so it's so far so good. I like that he likes Mittens. That's important. Yeah. He invited Mittens on the getaway. I said no. And then he walked Mittens and I around his house and explained football to us. There's four downs. They're 10 yards each. And he carried around and explained football to Mittens and I. That's good. Yeah, that's how John and I did things too. He carried you and he carried you and Mittens around. Yeah. Explain football. Yeah, no, I learned about all about football. Where do you play tennis again? I play it up at the Vermont Canyon Court. Oh, yeah. Do you want to play? I was actually thinking, because I know you're a tennis player. When I finally joined the country club, which I'm joining, I think in April when I move, you can play there. Oh my God, I would love that. We could play mixed double. Or we could play against each other. We could just rally, whatever. Right, right. And I'm going to get my daughter in lessons too. I love it. It makes me happy and you get to wear fun, cute outfits. That's what she's really interested in, I think. Do you wear like a hot retro thing? Do you wear sweatpants and stuff? Do you wear tight white shorts like Beyond Borg? Thanks for listening. If you want more of this, listen to Jeff Lewis live every weekday on SiriusXM as well as the Jeff Lewis channel, exclusively on the SiriusXM app. Crisp, vibrant and bursting with citrus. Villamiria's New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc is the perfect wine made to be enjoyed on every occasion. Whether you're soaking up the sun in your garden, hosting a backyard barbecue, or unwinding after a long day, the zesty lime and lush tropical fruits are always delicious. Try Villamiria Sauvignon Blanc, a vibrant New Zealand wine that's perfect for every occasion. Available at all good wine retailers.