The Mosquito Chef/Suing Dinos

Hey grown ups, Lee here. Boy oh boy, we really want to thank our listeners who chipped in over the holidays to help fund season 8 of the Story Pires podcast. It's really clear to us that we can't do this alone and the generosity you showed us was an instant reminder of how incredible this community of listeners is. It feels really amazing to know that each of you believes that all kids are creative geniuses just like we believe. Thank you, thank you, thank you. You may notice in the coming weeks some new names in the credits too we have some amazing new co-executive producers that were so grateful have come on board. And by the way the limited time cameo videos were so popular that we're keeping it going for just a little bit longer until the end of January you can still get a personalized video from myself or Peter. But this is really your last chance after January 31st we won't be doing these again anytime soon. So if there is a birthday or a special event coming up later in the year that you'd like to have a personalized video for get your orders in now and you'll still be helping the Story Pires finish our season. And of course all donations are completely tax deductible. Watch your personalized video or get in touch about a larger contribution at storypires.com slash support. That link is also in the show notes for today's episode. Okay on to the show after a few more words for the grownups. Hey grownups Lee here. See Story Pires live. Our amazing touring cast including Eric will be visiting some East Coast cities this spring to perform some of your favorite songs from the podcast. And they'll take suggestions from kids in the audience to create a brand new story that will only be seen once. Best of all all of our upcoming shows are on weekends so no need to worry about school nights or bedtime routines. We'll see you soon in Munhall, Pennsylvania just outside of Pittsburgh. Cincinnati, Ohio, Port Smith, New Hampshire, Medford, Massachusetts just outside of Boston and Richfield, Connecticut. Thanks to all the shows are on sale now at storypires.com slash live. Hey Lee, hey Peter. Anything interesting happening on the ship today? And not yet but I find that if you just wait a couple of seconds something interesting always seems to. Everyone listen up. I, Rachel, have finally done it. I have constructed the perfect chair. See what I mean? Oh yeah. Peter Lee, behold my magnum opus. That is one beautiful rocking chair, Rachel. That it is Peter. I've been diligently working on it down in my wood shop for years and she's finally complete. My angel. The ship has a wood shop? Yeah, it's down by the storage room. The ship has a storage room? I turned the legs on my foot-powered lace. I steamed bent the rockers with exhaust from the bean and porium and I hand chiseled the story pirates logo onto each of the rails. I thought that was a nice touch. Wow. I don't know what any of that means. It's breathtaking, Rachel. Are you going to sell it? I sure am. This one of a kind handcrafted masterpiece is only 38,000 ship coins. What? That is so expensive. That's the price of quality. Did someone say I wish I could buy an affordable and easy to transport chair? No. Then look no further. Hi, I'm Sigfried the Orange, owner and spokesfiking for Beltchair. Beltchair? Beltchair. The world's first biodegradable chair that rapidly prints out of the back of your belt wherever and whenever you start to sit. What? Oh, I'd be happy to demonstrate. City? Outs. Ah, there. A whole chair just popped out the back of his belt. And when you're done sitting, simply stand up and watch as your belt's incineration feature clears the chair from existence. Did you say incineration? Standing up? Ah! Beltchair is only 13 ship coin and if you sign up for Beltchair Plus right now for only 1299 a month, you can have chair cartridge refills automatically shipped to your home address for free. I love free refills. Who's in? Me? I'll take a belt chair. Me too. I never realized how great chairs are until now. What? Wait, what about my chair? I actually made it. I'm sure Sigfried didn't make that belt. Of course not. I bought the technology from Nimini. That's the free market for you. Not my fault if your little wood shop around the corner can't compete. Your soulless corporate chairs will never catch on. Don't worry Rachel. When your little independent wood shop fails, you can always come work for me. Never. I'll never sell out to big chair. I love free refills. It just filled me up with joy. My mom loves the jokes. Yo, yo, my Jack. It's maybe very proud about my studying. Now the sign of free size. I definitely think I can be more creative now. I'm the champion. The solely pilots. Welcome back to the Story Pires podcast, everyone. Where we take stories written by kids, and turn them into sketch comedy and songs. And other times, we try to crush our friends' independent chair company by flooding the market with cheap, pre-favricated chairs. What do you expect? I'm a Viking. Conquering is every Viking's love language. That's not true. I have another Viking friend who's way more thoughtful than you. Rachel, you have another Viking friend? I do. We met in an online chat room about axes. He understands how sensitive us woodworkers are, unlike this barbarian. Ha! You think I don't know about woodworkers? My best friend is a woodworker. Her name, coincidentally, is also Rachel. But she understands me like you never could, Rachel. Oh yeah? Well, Rachel sounds terrible. Rachel's the best. Now, if you'll excuse me, Rachel, I'm going back to my room to email Rachel. And not you, Rachel. I'm storming away too. Goodbye. Goodbye. Hmm. I think I see where this is going. Yeah, it's just like the plot of that movie that's a remake of the other movie. Yeah. Jurassic Park. No, Peter. Nevermind. Should we just do a story? Yes, please. Here to introduce it is the author. Hi, I'm Shogla of nine years old. I'm Matisse and I'm seven years old. And I'm Elena and I'm nine years old. And Wolf, I'm Illinois. This is our story. The Mysterious Staff. Get back here, Miss Gato. Please, please stop chasing me, pun police. I didn't mean to eat that bug. I swear. He's got the way. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill you. Just because you ever swam me. Can't you ever swam me! I'll never fucking, never fucking! Ugh! I got away! Oh, that was a close one for me. More mosquito, the mosquito. Oh, why can't I control my insatiable urge to eat other bugs? I'm starting a new life. I'll just need a new persona. Huh, what could it be? Hey, it looks like I've flown into a butt kitchen. Order up. Excuse me, what is this place? It's the most famous bug kitchen in town. Hi, I'm Chef Spider. A chef, eh? Well, maybe my new... I get to eat, could be a chef. What's that? Uh-uh, I said, I could help you out. You can't just be a chef. I went to culinary school for this. Le Cordon, green. It's a one to two-year program. One to two years! And I'm on a mosquito! My life's been two to four weeks. But then you'll need a faster program. Maybe try the University of Flee Nits. That will take about a week. Oh, perfect. Uh-oh, how can I ever thank you, Chef Spider? Don't mention it. It's tough out here for a bug. This business will eat you alive. Ha-ha-ha! Yeah. Good idea. What? Oh, no, you're eating me! Oh, Borsky, don't you dare it again! That was the last one. Onto my new identity. To culinary school! Graduates of the University of Flee Nits, it's been a busy week, and we're so proud of all of you. Here to give the valedictorian speech is a student bug chef who's stored above all expectations. Chef, more! Ski-no! I'm bullshit! Hey! My fellow graduates, I feel like we've all grown so close over these seven long days that I now consider you all dinner. I mean, family, I thank you all for the bottom of my stomach. I mean, heart. Now, let's get out there and change the bug oil. No! No! Chef, more, Ski-no! Come back here behind the curtain. Wow, you really have a way with the crowd. They love you up there. Oh, thanks, Dean. What can I say I love a crowd? And the crowd loves you, darling. Huh? So much charisma this is exactly who we need to save our network. Your network? That's right, Chef Ski-no. I'm an executive at TBN, the bug network. The bug network? That's the one, the bug network. We were all set to have a new cooking show, hosted by Chef Spider, but he mysteriously went missing seven long days ago. Oh, right! Chef Spider sure was delicious, I mean. Tilted? That he was. But I think I see an even bigger star right here in front of me. Me? What? No. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. I think you, Morski-no, are the next big star of TBN. Really? You're hired. See you Monday morning. Ciao. Wow, one of my students is a big TV star. Morski-no, I wish I could go with you. Well, Dean, maybe you can. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Wait, what? You're in a room. Oh, Morski-no, you did it again. It's it. That's the last one. You can't keep doing this once you become a TV star. And this, how you make a decaying, pleants, quiche. We love you, Chef Morski-no. Woo! We'll be right back with more mosquito bites with Chef Morski-no. Woo! Yeah, yeah. Woo! Ah-ah! And we're clear. Hey, great job, everybody. More, baby. You're killing it out there. Oh, thanks. OK, we're back in 30. Say, is that a new stage manager? Where did Stan go? You know, I'm not sure. Vacation? Strange how many bugs have been taking vacation recently. It sure is. Ah, the police. Hello, I'm Detective Roli Poly. Chef, Ski-no, you mind if I ask you a couple questions? Oh, I was very detective, but we're about to be back on the air. Maybe after the show. Hmm, you know, you'll look familiar. I should think so. He's the biggest star in Bugland. Yeah, I did a lot. We're back in five. We'll talk after the show. Sure thing. And three, two. Welcome back to the Bug Network. I'm your host, Chef, more Ski-no, and you're watching Mosquito Boys. Woo! Boy, oh boy, I'm excited for what? What is up next? Today, my first guest is, let me just look at my cats here. Ah, Bug. Yep, his name is Bug. Hi, everyone. My name is Bug, and I finally get to be on the most famous bug doctor of all time. Ah! Well, that's very kind of you, Bug. Now, you are also a chef. So tell me about your new restaurant. It's a vegetarian-forward diner called Leaf Me Alone. Oh, wow. Tell me more. Well, it's in a tree. Right. Well, that's all the time we have. Until next time, this has been Mosquito Boys. Woo! Woo! Woo! And we're clear. Wow, that was a lot of fun. Thanks for having me on. Oh, my pleasure. Say, would you mind signing my autograph book? It's just backstage over here behind this wall where no one can say, ah, a sure. It's right here. Can you make it out to Bug? Sure thing. To Bug, Chef Ski-no. Thank you so much. Of course, I am going to eat you. What? Wow! Hey, Bug. That was... Oh, hey, Chef. Where did Bug go? Oh, we're just at Bug. We're just at Bug. Oh, I think you went down the hatch. Bug police. I remember you now. You're at Mosquito, who keeps eating everybody. You've been eating everyone? Say it ain't so. It ain't so? Oh, good. Because I was really worried about that. Hey, stop. I'm going to eat you. I'm going to eat you. I'm going to eat you. I'm going to eat you. Hey, stop eating bugs. I'm so sorry. You are under arrest. You're going to Bug jail. No! Hey, Mosquito. What's you in for? Eating bugs? How about you, Duog? Barking up the wrong tree. Rough. Well, I guess this is the end of my story. Doesn't have to be. You want to get out of here? Wow. I take us down into the sewers and it's we have a dance party. Finally, I'll have a kid to start over. And this time, I won't eat any bugs. Here I go. Digging down to the... Whoa! Read me! Whoa! Oh, boy, I really have a problem. The end! What a wonderful story that was. Yeah. It was exactly what I was thinking. I was thinking about it. It was exactly what I needed to stop thinking about Sigfried and his quote, unquote, chairs. Well, guess I'm actually still thinking about that, huh? I know what will cheer me up. Going on, the net. And exchanging emails with my anonymous best friend, which I can do, because I am a grown-up. I'll just open my big, chunky laptop here. And log on. Hmm. Dial up really is the only way to surf the web. You've got an electronic message. Ah, my favorite words. It's from my friend, Fancy Viking Y1K. Let's see what he says. Dear friend, I was thinking about what you said the other day about how hard it is living on your pirate ship that's been converted into a land ship so far from the ocean. And it got me thinking about how hard it is living on my pirate ship that's been converted into a land ship so far from the ocean, especially for Binky. Binky is my narwhal. He loves the sea almost as much as I do, although he likes to eat bits of fish and squid straight from the depths, and I prefer to buy them. But he chose to stay with me on this ship, or he spends 18 hours a day sleeping on a large green pillow the size of, well, a narwhal. Hahaha, fun. Don't you love the ocean in the fall? It makes me want to buy Viking raiding supplies. I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened axes if I knew your full name and address. On the other hand, this is not knowing who you are, has its charms. Hahaha, Fancy Viking Y1K. You are so relatable. Rachel! What is it, Sigfried? Would you keep it down in here? You're deafening laughter is distracting me from electronically corresponding with my friend. Your friend? I bet she's not even real. How dare you! She's more real than you'll ever be! Now keep it down! Fine. All father, give me strength. Gah! Back to my room. Ha, back to my computer. Everything alright, Sigfried? Not now, narwhal. Sorry. It's time for me to log on. You've got Viking electronic nail. Odin Zyball! I have a message from my dear friend, the Better Rachel. Her screen name is really wonderful. Woodshop Girl Rachel, the story pirate. I've always wondered what it means. I think it means that Rachel is... I wasn't asking you, Binky. Sorry. Let's see what she says. Dear friend, I would love a bouquet of axes. Thank you. You know, for woodworking. Recording what you told me the other day about how you were reluctant to start your new business for fear of hurting your friend, I've since found myself in a remarkably similar situation and I actually have some advice. Be ruthless. It's not personal, it's business. I actually own my own company and this nasty Viking is trying to put me out of business. But am I going to roll over and give up? No. And neither are you. Because you are a Viking. And Vikings don't surrender. Okay, love you bye. Yes, of course. My best friend Rachel is right about my best enemy, Rachel. I shall not surrender. I will fight for Valahalla! Hello! What is it now? You! Yes, me. And would you keep it down in here? I'm trying to wait for my online friend to write me back in peace. Ha! I'm starting to think that your online Viking isn't even real. As far as I know, I'm the only real Viking left. Typical, you think the whole Viking world revolves around you? Well, I can assure you that there is at least one more out there. Oh yeah? What's his name? His real name? I don't know. But his screen name is delightful. It's fancy Viking Y1K. Now, good day to you, sir. Huh. That's funny. My screen name is fancy Viking Y1K. But how could... I mean, if her friend's screen name is... And my screen name is that... Wait. Hold on. Almost got it. That means that she must be... The same Rachel? Why at narwhals? Sorry. Huh! The same Rachel! Oh, wait, is that what you just said? Yes. Right. Boy, I am so rude to you. It's okay. We'll be right back after a few words or the grown-ups. Hey grown-ups, today's episode is sponsored by Bombus. You know, people keep asking me about my 2026 resolutions, and I'm like, bruh, it's February. I thought we loved our New Year's resolutions in January, but then I remember the number one resolution at the top of my list, Gettencumphi. And that's where Bombus comes in. They're bringing serious comfort to all my everyday go-to's. This year, I've been watching the Winter Olympics a lot, and I'm thinking of taking up the lose. And wow, the all-new Bombus sports socks would be perfect. For that. 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So head on over to bombus.com slash family26 and use code family26 for 20% off your first purchase. That's bombas.com slash family26 code family26 at checkout. Hey grownups, Lee here. See story Pirates Live. Our amazing touring cast including Eric will be visiting some East Coast cities this spring to perform some of your favorite songs from the podcast. And they'll take suggestions from kids in the audience to create a brand new story that will only be seen once. Best of all, all of our upcoming shows are on weekends so no need to worry about school nights or bedtime routines. We'll see you soon in Munhall, Pennsylvania, just outside of Pittsburgh, Cincinnati, Ohio, Port Smith, New Hampshire, Metford, Massachusetts, just outside of Boston, and Richfield, Connecticut. Tickets to all the shows are on sale now at story pirates.com slash live. And just a little more standing over here and some stain over there and done. Ah, perfect. There it is, Rachel. You're very last chair. Hey Rachel, do you know what this mysterious storage room is that everyone's talking about? Yeah, that's right next door. Thanks. Wait, Peter, don't you want to see this new chair, I bill? Oh, that's okay. I have a belt chair. See, sitting down. Ah! Haha, I forgot. I haven't bought one yet. Hey, it's fun down here on the ground. I'm gonna roll away. Bye! Woo! Curse that belt chair! Ah. Knock knock? SIGFRED? Oh. Hi. Well, looks like you've succeeded. No one wants my chairs anymore, so I'm shutting down my business. Have you come to Glowt? No, I just want to make sure you know it wasn't personal. It was just business. Huh, that sounds just like the advice I gave a friend recently. But now that I'm on the other side of it, I gotta say it does feel personal. Oh, Rachel, what is this incredible chair you've constructed? It's magnificent. Oh, this? It's a replica red cedar iceberg Viking chair. I made it for my best friend, fancy Viking. For me? I mean, him? It's perfect. I'm certain he will love it. I hope so. I've invited him to meet me at our next gas station stop in three minutes, where I'm going to give it to him. You did? Yes, I just sent him an electronic mail, but he hasn't responded yet. Wow. When he arrives, I hope he's not a disappointment. Oh, he won't be. You know, sometimes I wonder, if I hadn't randomly picked chairs as my new business, something about which you care deeply and I have no real opinion, maybe we'd still be friends. Probably. Then you and I would never have gone to war, and the only thing we'd fight about is which flavor of Lee's homemade kefir is the worst. Well, who fights about that? Not us, because we both know that it's raspberry and old shoes. Yes, that one literally makes no sense. Right? Well, I really have to go. Of course. You don't want to be late. Good luck. Thanks. Oh, hey, sick freed, where you going? To face the music Lee, wish me luck. Uh, okay, good luck. Peter, why are you rolling around on the ground? I don't remember, but I am so lost. Hey, the ship is stopping. Are we here? Have we reached the gas station? I, for one, do not know where I am. Oh, dizzy. Yep, we have. You gotta help me carry this chair outside. Quickly, the outside. That was extremely heavy. Am I too late? Is it here? I don't see anyone. Of course, he's not here. He's not my real friend. Plus, I only emailed him 10 minutes ago, and I have no idea where he even is on the planet. I won't reach all. You've made a fool of yourself on the internet. Again. Are you still wondering who your online friend is? I think it's pretty obvious that. Binky! Hey, Binky, get back here. You know our wall! Is that a normal wall rolling by and a wagon? Binky, but that's the name of Fancy Viking Y1K's normal. That it is. Sick freed? What are you doing here? You invited me. Would shopgirl Rachel the story pirate? Fancy Viking Y1K? I hope my friendship isn't a disappointment. I... I wanted it to be you. I wanted it to be you so badly. Wow, this really is like that movie. Yeah. Except the way last dinosaurs. Peter? Yes, Lee? Never change. I don't know how. Could we do another story? Yeah! Great idea, Binky! And here to introduce it is the author! Hi, I'm Alani and I'm Tenusel. And I'm Alaya and I'm Toyuzel. We live in New York. This is our story, doing dinos. Hey, Alani. Hey, Alaya. How was school, little brother? It was alright, but now I'm really excited to be home where I don't have to worry about anything scary, like the dentist. Time to go to the dentist! No, Mom, please! She shall I, are you always overreact? But the dentist is scary! This one isn't. I found a new place called the dinotist. Sounds fun, right? Not really. That's the spirit. Let's go! Here we are at the dinotist dentist office. You wait here on this bench and I'll check you in. Mom, this bench is weird. It feels like gummy candy. A dentist office made entirely out of unhealthy food? That's different. I'll be right back. Whoa, this bench is jiggly. Is it actually candy? It is! Oh, hey kid, I didn't see you there. Get out while you can. Your teeth will only get worse if you come here. What? That's not even the worst part. The worst part is Franklin. The dentist will see you now. Oh no. I gotta go. Good luck. Goodbye! Wait, what's the worst part? What's the worst part? Ah! Alright, Eliya, you're all checked in. Have you tried this wall? It's made out of cake. I don't know, Mom. I'm a kid and even I know that there's something not right about a dentist office made out of unhealthy food. I think we should go home before. Eliya, the dentist will see you now. Mom, no! Eliya, you are overreacting again. Come fun in there. Oh. And here you are, up in the chair. See? You were overreacting. The dinotisters are so bad. I guess not. Hey, why did they call it the dinotist anyway? Because the dentist is a T-Rex. Oh, well that makes... Wait, what? Oh! Alright, there you are, Eliya. How are we doing today? You're a dinosaur. You'll feel charged. Alright, let's take a look at those chompers. Let me grab my tool here and we'll take a look. Wait, is that tool made out of rock candy? It is. Now open wide and let's do some dinodendistry. No! Eliya's mom? Right here! Sorry! These cheesecake door knobs are irresistible. Eliya, how was it? At the beginning of the exam, they said I had a cavity. Oh no. But at the end, they said I had 12 more. What? Yes, this is actually a pretty common issue. This is unacceptable. The dentist should fix teeth, not make them worse. Why, I oughta. Now, Eliya, what are you going to do? Let's not overreact. I'm not going to overreact, mom. I'm going to... Sue this T-Rex. Oh no! I'll see you in court. Order in the court. Next case, we have Eliya, the child, versus T-Rex, the dentist. Good afternoon, Your Honor. And, Eliya? I will be serving as my little brother's attorney. I think maybe you kids have overreacted. Mom? Sorry, sorry. Two children. This is highly unorthodox. I'll tell you what's unorthodox. A dinosaur dentist that builds an office out of unhealthy food, so that all their patients leave with more cavities than they went in with. What, what, what? You can't say that. That's lander. Oh yeah? What are you going to do about it? I'm going to sue you. I'll see you in court. Order in the court. Next case, we have T-Rex, the dentist, versus Alani, the child, lawyer. Hello, Mr. Rex. Good afternoon, Your Honor. And, Alani. I'm here being represented by my brother, Eliya. Your Honor. Maybe we should all take things down a notch here, huh? Wait a second. Did we ever sort out that last case? No, Your Honor. That T-Rex sued me, and we just jump straight to this case. Which, I think you should dismiss. You think you can tell me what to do in my own court? I'm in charge here, and there's nothing you can do about it. What if I sue the judge? Yeah! Order in the court. Next case, we have Alani, the child, lawyer, versus the judge. What am I doing over here? And why is the T-Rex up in my seat? The bailiff here, let me in. Sorry, I don't know what's happening. Bay-Lif, you failed at your duties. I'm going to sue the bailiff. Oh! Order in the court. The next case is the judge, versus the bailiff. Mom, how did you become the judge? I honestly don't know. Should we dismiss the cases? Does anyone object? I do. The dental hygienist. I object to the fact that when you're at the office, you ate the doorknob, and I've been trapped in it ever since. I had to eat my way through ten layers of wall cake. Oh, that's my fault? What are you going to do? Actually, do not answer that. I'm going to sue the mom. Order in the court. Next case, hygienist versus mom. Scared kid from the dentist? I don't want to be up here. This is getting out of hand. We now have several undecided open cases. Everyone, stop suing each other. You can't tell me what to do. I'm suing you. Oh, yeah, well, I'm suing you. I'm suing you both. I'm suing you. I'm suing you. I'm suing you. I'm suing you. I'm suing myself. What? Why? I felt left out. Bay-Lif. I'm suing you. I'm suing myself. I'm suing myself. I'm suing myself. Order in my court. Okay, we've been here for weeks now and this is the final case. The entire world versus the entire world. Entire world. You're suing the entire world because let me see here. The entire world suages you before I give my verdict. Does anyone want to say anything for or against the entire world? Your Honor, I have something to say. I'm going to sue the entire- Alaya? That is enough. Mom? Don't you think that maybe just maybe this might be an overreaction? Yes, that dentist was a bad dentist, but I am sure we can work something out without suing the entire world. But, uh-huh. Wow. Yeah, I think maybe I've taken things a little too far. Me too. T-Rex? Your words have moved me that kids, Mom. I'm very sorry I built my office out of unhealthy food. The secret is, I'm a dinosaur. I have no idea what I'm doing. I think we should drop the case. What do you say, Your Honor? Too late for that. I side in favor of the entire world. No! Which means the entire world has to pay everything they own. No! Too itself. No! What happened? It's a heavy fight. Wow. I think that means that we all win. And lose. Anyway, I'm so sorry I overreacted. It's okay. I'm still so proud of you, kids. Now can we finally go home and relax? Where there's nothing to worry about. Oh, if that reminds me, it is time to go to the doctor. I'm suing you! Alaya? Sorry. The end. And now Lee speaks with the author. Alani and Alaya, it's Lee from Story Pyrids. Hi. Hi. Okay, which one of you is Alani? Alani. Okay, and which one of you is Alaya? Alaya. Wow. Okay. Wow. So first, you wrote two stories, both about suing dinos, is that right? Yes. Can you tell me how you came up with your idea for these stories? The dinosaurs are far as me and Alaya love dinosaurs. The seabed is me and the seabed part, I guess, is definitely the spot of that. I'm not sure we've ever talked about this on the show before. Could you explain what suing is? It's like people going to court and there's a judge on the judge beside who gets the thing that they're arguing about. So it's like, if you have a problem, you can go to court and someone will help you decide what's right. Sort of? Yeah, I think it's like that. Okay, cool. And in this case, the dentist is the one being sued, right? Yes. And the dentist is a dinosaur. Yes. So, talk me through it. If then Alaya sues the dentist and Alaya wins, what is Alaya get? Like, Alaya would get close to the dentist or get it the mallet or something. All right, cool. And then in the second story, the dinosaurs that are getting sued sue the humans and they sue Alani. Yes. What right do they have to sue Alani? It doesn't seem like Alani did anything wrong. Well, they might think that it's not fair so they don't agree with the judge. Okay, so I have a question. I was wondering if we could maybe act out some of this court scene together. So maybe like Alani, you could be the judge. Okay. And I could play Alaya your brother and then Alaya, maybe you can play the dinosaur who just roars. Roar. Okay, your honor. I'm here in court today because something very, very bad has happened to me. I went to the dentist and this T-Rex right here made my teeth terrible and I need you to give me justice, judge. Well, first, I've listened to both sides. Well, first, you. Well, I went to the dentist like normal and the T-Rex dentist just made my teeth worse. See, look, look at my teeth right here. Yee-ee. What was that thing? I know. Now the dinosaur inside. I'm not understanding that. So I think Alaya has won and the dinosaur has been chooed. Yes. Sorry, Dino. Roar. And can I ask your honor, what kind of damages can I expect here? What do I get for winning this case? You can do whatever you want with a dentist's dream. Well, maybe I'm just going to turn it into a dinosaur petting zoo. What do you think, T-Rex? I'm going to take that as a yes. Alani and Alaya, I'm so in love with your story. It is so good both of your stories. Thank you so much for sending them into us and letting us perform them. You're welcome. You're welcome. Okay. Bye, guys. Bye, thank you, Lene. Bye, bye. And when we come back, it's time for Story Love where Peter and I read even more stories written by kids. Welcome back to Story Love where we read stories written by kids and we talk about them. I'm your host, Lee. And this is Peter. And I'm a guy. You're also a host. Thank you. You're a co-host. Thank you. Alright, let's get into it, shall we? We shall. You read the very first story. Oh, absolutely. I would love to. This one's from Tessa, a seven year old in Wisconsin and it's called a planet in a black hole. Allison looked online for advice. Does the black hole have any planets? Reply. No. Then when she asked her mom, mom, does the black hole have any planets? Her mom said no. One day she went to outer space. She went to the black hole and she went into the black hole and looked and looked and when she saw a planet, she hugged it. And she saw a banana on the planet. Then she saw a palace with a king banana, a queen banana and of course a princess banana and a prince banana. Of course. Then Allison realized that this is a banana planet. The queen banana, welcome to our banana planet in the black hole. The queen asked Allison, do you want to stay? Um, yes, I want to stay. Said princess, Allison. Okay, but then right as princess Allison went to her room, something happened to the banana villagers. The banana villagers got hypnotized by the oranges and the bananas are saying, I am in orange. We love you, queen orange. Then Allison realized that the king was not hypnotized and she asked the king, could you pour this cup of medicine on the queen's head? So the king did. Of course. And the queen got cured and the villagers thanked Allison so much and she would visit every day the end. Uh, wow. The immediate thing in this story that I found really intriguing is they just write up the bat, say does the black hole have any planets? Yeah. Mom does the black hole. Oh, interesting. Which means that this world has always been near a black hole or recently, which is why they don't know much about it. It could be that in the last week or so, they're like, there's just a black hole has situated itself right outside of Earth. And now everyone refers to it as the black hole. That's what we would do if a black hole showed up. Yeah. I mean, like, you heard about the black hole. Yeah. Exactly. I love the idea of that she asks the internet does the black hole have any planets and just on the screen it just says no. No, it sounds like the internet does protest too much. Oh, yeah. What do you have to hide internet? Exactly. I think that the message of this story is trust, but verify. Mm-hmm. Then can we also talk about how she became a princess? What do you think that means? Is that Allison presuming to be a princess or did they officially make her join the family? Yeah. Oh. Yeah. They're like, you're a special visitor from elsewhere in the universe and you're of high enough status here that if you're going to stay, you can be a princess in our family. What you said is do you want to stay? Um, yes, I want to stay. Yeah. Just accepting it turned her into a princess. Yeah. It was implied. Tessa, amazing story. So creative. Thank you so much for sending it into us. All right, Peter, would you read us the next one? This next story comes to us from a 14-year-old from Florida named Yehuda and their story is called the Fluby Store. Excellent title. Can I just say off the bat? This story is the first that I have ever received in story parrots that was written on a typewriter. Are you sure? Yes. Wow. It is. All right, here it is. Wow. The Fluby Store. Greg's Morning Moved Place then gets abruptly cut off by tires screeching and a cat hissing. Jack, I'm up. I'm, hey, wait. Why is there a giant bunny holding an envelope in its mouth? That doesn't matter. Male for me is awesome. What does the letters say? Jack, reading out loud. You have been invited to the grand opening of the Fluby Store, the only store that you can buy anything, including Flubies. That's pretty awesome, isn't it? Jack, wow. That's so cool. I wonder what a Fluby is. That doesn't matter. I'm going to go tell Mom. Hey, Mom. Come here. Jack's Mom. Coming, honey. Jack's Mom comes into the room. Oh my goodness. Did you get an invitation to the Fluby Store? Jack. Yes. That's amazing. We're going right now. I have school today, Mom. And how are we even going to get there? There's no address on the card. I know the way. Let's go. They jump in the car and drive to a store with clown music playing in the background. Jack, wow. It's the Fluby Store. They go in the store. Store salesmen. Welcome to the Fluby Store. Why would you like to buy? Well, I'd like to know what a Fluby is. So I'll take one, please. OK, that'll be $3 trillion and $2. Non-refundable already charged to your card. Jack, what? Never mind. Can I have my Fluby now? OK, here's your Fluby. It's a cat with a chocolate-covered smartwatch strapped to its back and a penny as a third eye. Why did this cost $3 trillion and $2? Well, it plays the story pirate, so there's that. OK, that makes sense. The end. And then you're right. At the bottom is a story by Ihuda typed on my vintage typewriter. Incredible. So cool. This story is amazing. So funny. I really love that the mom is like, let's skip school and just go straight to the Fluby store. I know where it is. Everyone, every cool mom knows where the Fluby store is. That's right. And the clown music that plays in the store instantly menacing. Yeah, you know something is off. We love it. And we don't often, as a rule, as story pirates, we don't do fanfiction. However, at the very end, when they say, well, place the story pirates back, so there's that. Like sold. Sold. For $3 trillion in $2. You know, story pirates, we really like to do sort of a fast-talking snake oil salesman. Yes, yes. But this was a new level where he goes, that'll be $3 trillion in $2. Non-refundable already charged to your card. The already charged to your card is a level even I didn't see coming. Right. Well, obviously, this establishment is engaged in some kind of identity theft. 100%. That's like the existence of it, you know, presumes that. A cat with chocolate-covered smartwatch strapped to its back in a penny as a third eye. So good. It's a perfect level of, it sort of seems fancy, but is obviously like a scam. I don't think I've ever heard smartwatch or third eye in a story. Not together. Certainly not together. Yehuda, so fantastic. Thank you for sending this and thank you for taking the time to type it on your vintage typewriter. I'm super impressed. Very exciting. All right, we got one more story here, Peter. Get ready. All right. From a seven-year-old in China named Helena, here is opposite world. Mick Shaggy butt says, I wear a mixer and I cook with a dress. Ow! The mixer mixed me. Ow! The dress burned me. I'm so angry at my mixer that I planted it on the ground. And now I'm going to water. It's so much it doesn't grow. I'm going to bed and I'm sleeping in a dehumidifier. And the bed is getting all the water out of the air for me. I wake up. I'm going out on my morning, out for my morning walk. Oh no! A giant mixer grew. Well, I guess I'll just wear it. Okay. Here I go to wear the giant mixer. Oh no! I turned giant! And the end. What? Peter! What? Explain the story to me. Okay. So there's a lot of clear opposites which is... Are there? Are there? You... Well, you're right. If I wear a mixer, well, if you wear a mixer and cook with a dress, you swap them. Okay. So that's a clear opposite. You're right. You're right. But then if you're wearing a mixer, it's going to mix you. Yeah. And the dress is going to burn you. I guess because maybe the dress caught on fire when you tried to cook it. Exactly. That's what I was thinking. Okay. And showing them... I did opposites, but they don't work. We're showing them why it's a bad idea. And then you're angry at the mixer that you tried to wear. And so then you planted in the ground? Yeah. You planted in the ground. I'm not sure. I think that was just frustration on this character's part. Are you sure though? Because I think they're saying that planting in the ground is the opposite of throwing away. Because you're trying to bring new life to it rather than extinguish the life of the object. Well, I tell you the opposite that was the most distressing to me. I mean, trying to wear a mixer and getting mixed by a mixer is very unpleasant. Yeah. Yeah. That's going to be dangerous. Don't play with that at home. Well, lick the beaters on that one. No, no. No. It's sleeping in a do-humane fire. Fine. You're bed being a dehumidifier. Having a wet mattress is not so uncomfortable. Yeah. I've been in that situation. And it's getting wetter as it goes because it's pulling the moisture out of the air. Yeah. Yeah. I'd rather sleep in a dehumidifier. No, no, no, no. No. Helena, thank you so much for sending this in. Thank you to all of today's authors. Keep sending us stories and to read all of today's story love stories just head to storypirates.com. And guess what, grownups, you can find an even longer version of today's story love on YouTube. And grownups, story love isn't just the name of a segment on our show. It's also the name of our incredible corporate volunteer program. To find out more about story love, our digital creative writing program story quest, or our nonprofit arm story pirates change makers, check the show notes for links. Thanks for today's episode. Thanks to today's authors, Alani, Alaya, Shalva, Adiv and Elena. And guess what, it's not too late to send us your story. Growdups can submit stories at storypirates.com. That link is also in the show notes for today's episode. We'll be back next week with another brand new episode. Until then, stay creative and stay kind. Bye! The Story Pires podcast is a production of Story Pires Studios. Executive produced by Lee Overtreet and Benjamin Salka. This episode was produced by Sam Bear, Peter McNerney, Andrew Miller and Lee Overtreet. Recording Sound Design and Mixing by Sam Bear at the Relic Room in New York City. Additional production by Brett Tuvine. Theme Song by Bobby Lorde. Musical scoring by Ericerson and Jack Mitchell. Our head writer is Peter McNerney. Staff writers are Megan O'Neal and Alexis Simpson. Contributing writers are Lee Overtreet and Michael CeeLaw. Episode artwork by Camilla Franklin. This episode features performances by Matt Cox, Christina Grosspeach, Gabby Hornig, Quintin Johnson, Rachel Girovsky, Peter McNerney, Lee Overtreet, Joshua Nasser, Samantha Turret and Rachel Winnitzky. Woo! That was a doozy of an episode. Finally, time to relax in my new chair. Okay, I think I just pressed this button here. Okay. Sit. Ah. Relaxing. Hmm. Okay. Time to get up and work on next week's episode. So I just pressed this button here. Ah! That is really unnerving.