Ep 87: Katfished! Hook, Line & Sinker - How to Spot Fake Profiles

Find us at vanilla swingers.com and you'll find Kat's only fans page there too. You wish. Hey Kat. Yeah Leo. I'm going to record one of those silly disclaimers that you put at the beginning of the podcast. Real advisory sticker. Let's go because this is going to be explicit. Oh yeah we're going to talk about lots of sex. Lots of bad language. We might even have sex on the podcast. We might have. Listening to the noise of our love making. There might be nudity. But you can't see it on the podcast. Doesn't matter. You can hear it. You can hear the nudity. We might corrupt you if you're under the age of 18. That's the disclaimer. Don't listen. We're not professional. What else? And yeah we're not professionals. We know nothing. Absolutely nothing. And if you want to try to sue us? Well we don't have any money either. Because this is bite-size and commercial free. We're not trying to make any money. It's fun. So if you like it then tune in and listen. Subscribe. Word. Bouncy. Bouncy. Bouncy. Bouncy. Bouncy. It's Leo. This is Kitty Cat. I'm feeling a little unsettled this morning. I know. I'm feeling actually shell shocked. Why are you feeling that cat? Because you got catfished. I got catfished. And I didn't meet them in real life. Okay. I didn't get that catfished. But it is still difficult nonetheless. It stings because you don't like being tricked. I still want what I saw and it doesn't exist. Okay. Yours is different. I don't like being tricked. You still want it. I want it bad. I think we feel like we should be smarter than that. And it literally just happened within about an hour ago. And we thought, you know what? We should get this down on a pod because we are feeling really raw and really vulnerable right now. And I think you guys might appreciate the vulnerability. You want to see some warts is what you're saying. Okay. I should set this up for you a little bit. Well, first of all, the tickets are booked. We're heading to Europe. We're going to go to Amsterdam, Paris with Lil, Betty, Bunny. Well, Leo and I are of course going to have some couple of time alone on the tail end and on the front side of the trip. And so we're going to try to squeeze in a little extra male attention for Kat. Yes. And so you think Amsterdam, right? Dutch Den Timberlake. He's going to be out of town for that particular week that we're going to be there. No, he's like out of town for the whole month on like a sabbatical to Asia. Come on, dude. So bad timing. To know that you're in Europe and I can't see it was going to mentally destroy me. So let's jump on the apps. See what there is to see in Amsterdam ahead of time. I was pretty bummed. I've had this sexting thing with him for like four months and we were going to turn it real. And who do you find on day one of swiping? The best possible Dutch MFM I could ever have. You're talking about Dutch MGK. Oh my God. And he has a texting game. We texted for like a day and a half. It was unbelievable. I'd say he was like a Dutch version of machine gun Kelly, but taller. But MGK is actually really tall. No Dutch MGK. You don't understand. We were in a really vanilla day yesterday and I'm sitting here on the side texting on Bernie texting my new Dutch boy and I was like, oh my God, this blows Dutch in Timberlake out of the water. Yeah, who needs Dutch in Timberlake? I don't need him anyhow. This blows Malibu, Richie Rich out of the water. The first takeaway has got to be if it seems too good to be true, you should be skeptical. And we're pretty good at that. Like multiple times when it's too good to be true, I will say, look, can you just humor me and send me a video, not a photo holding up four fingers? And I think I've asked it four times and all four times they've done it. Absolutely. And we said on a previous pod that the amount of due diligence that we do before we ever get to a meetup, if you get to that point, we're pretty much 95% sure it's going to be a match, which means we're going to bring you into the bedroom. Like we pretty much know from the get go because based on the photos, based on the texting, and this one doesn't go against our record because we sussed him out before he ever got to that point. We sussed him out by day two and it was a photo issue. I mean, the texting game, whoever is behind it, he still has mad texting. We know who's behind it because he sent the last picture. It was actually of himself, but it didn't look anything like the first two. So he was whispering sweet nothings to you. He was saying what a beauty queen you were. He had this soft energy like I love kissing. I'm a great kisser. I hope you love to kiss. He was saying you're beautiful inside and out. Oh my God, he was naughty and sweet. And he was like, I'm a little nervous. I'm like, oh my God, you're just the kind of guy I like. The amount of variables that we identify over the course of an interaction, we're looking at pictures. I can see that he's standing in a kitchen and it looks like the lower kitchen cabinets come up to his kneecaps. And if you guys don't know anything about Dutch people, they're the tallest people in the world. They're like Viking descent. But when we go to Amsterdam, everybody towers over us like six feet is short. I think the place that we're going to be staying at in Amsterdam is an Airbnb. And it belongs to a guy who just happens to be six foot ten. I asked if we could borrow his bikes and he said, sure, but I don't think mine's going to fit you. I'm six ten. I'm like, yeah, I don't think that's going to fit me. How the Dutch don't dominate in the Olympics for basketball, volleyball, Oh, even like the high jump. You can just step over the high jump. But we notice the guy was really tall in the pictures. When I asked him how tall he was, you know, he gives it to me in centimeters and we look and we're like, that's only six one. OK. That's short by Dutch standards. Didn't look that way from the photos. But we're like, OK, so first hitch, but we didn't want to believe it. So we didn't even think about the first thing was that he had one face photo on his profile. Then he had a photo in a miniature kitchen of him from behind. Like tall and lanky looking with a moppy blonde hair. And then I did what I always do before I even have a conversation with you, because I don't want to waste my time. I ask, can you send me another face pic extra couple of candid selfies? And that is usually the determinant that will blow you out probably eight out of ten times. We learned that long ago. So I did. I followed my own script. I did it. He sent one picture timed. And one of the reasons is because the photos on the apps are their most curated photos that they take. Everybody knows you try to put your best foot forward. And if you just get a couple of candid selfies, you get a couple of candid selfies of Leo and I, you might be like, oh, my God, you're even worse in your profile. So we don't have face photos on our profile. Maybe it's for a reason. Face made for radio. Bouching about. But you did ask for a time photo. I didn't, you know, so I'm still grieving. OK, he was so adorable. That is funny that we have very two different. You're mad. Mine is I feel like I should be smarter than that. I don't like feeling like I've been tricked. Does it feel like you've been like robbed? I feel like I have pretty high street smarts. And you just got the rug pulled from under. No, you've got the rug pull. To me, I just feel like I should be more clever than that. And I feel like on your end, I'm gutted. You just wanted to be real. I wanted to be real. He was so cute. He wasn't like God's gift, but he he was pretty damn good looking. And the face photo he sent was like a candid selfie in bed just of his head. Yeah, he looked like a young MGK. Yeah. So your ID is over here, palette. That's what's going on. It really is because we chatted on and off all day yesterday. I went to bed thinking he'll probably write me in the morning and I woke up. I had a text from him. We talked about it at length so much so that we've invented something called I know you wanted to say it first. I know you want to say it first. Shut up. Go ahead. Say what it is. No, you can say it. Tell them tell them what they want. Cat, are you sure? Yeah, go ahead. No, I'm not going to be bad at you. It's called the alorty rule. Yeah, the alorty rule. You know that we've already said that Jacob Alorty is like my celeb crush. And if I ever got Jacob Alorty in my bedroom, I'm giving Kat the whole weekend with him. I'm just going to wave goodbye from the porch. And you know we don't play solo, so that's like a big deal. But Jacob Alorty, he doesn't exist. OK, he's not real. And so we dissected it. What does the alorty rule mean exactly? If the guy or the girl is so ridiculous, ridiculous. We're talking ridiculous. Then we can allow a little more alone time than we ever do. I might be willing to take a walk. Say what? Around the block. And we talked out like, no, honey, we don't play separate. That's really not going to happen. And then I'm like, I could do 20 minutes. But then I think, what am I getting at? I'm just taking a walk. You're just doing it for me. I'm getting a donor kebab on the corner. You're doing it for the cat gram, for the cat gram. I should be in the next room with Lil. Betty. All a conversation we had yesterday based on this guy. It wasn't just the photo. His texting game. I've never seen the match. Huge EQ. Oh, my Lord. Like whoever he is, he should do OK with the ladies because of his texting game. It was the Dick's Swing and Contest of EQ. He was like, do you mind me asking more questions? He was really curious about. May I ask if you don't mind? Oh, my God. But then he was also naughty and I'm still grieving. Still really grieving. Your ass was right in the check that your Dutch talk fuck boy couldn't cash. Yeah. But it led to something else. And so we created this thing called the alorty rule because I talked to him. I'm like, well, I don't know about that. Like he'd have to be exceedingly, exceedingly handsome. And so much so that it's not like I think I'm going to leave you for him. But it would be like such a bucket list one off that he would just be so good looking or she would be so hot and so out of anybody's league that you're like, I could give you a little bit of a long time. You're talking about punching above your weight. I am talking about punching above your weight. You guys know what that means. And you're like, when you see something that you're like, that is not in my league. Italian Edward fit that category. We should tell him that we're going to be in Amsterdam, Paris. What if he like? Wow, that could be a fantasy on lock. Now, not that we do the alorty rule with him, but he liked the whole MFM environment. But I do the alorty rule with him. He was really great. I'll put him in my trophy case, too. He's going to be on your Mount Rushmore. That's right. I would be like, OK, I didn't touch anything, but I liked it. He was with my wife. This is what he looks like. Aren't you proud? Aren't you proud? Aren't you proud? My wife got that. It's kind of like you and undergrad. If you guys had seen undergrad over in LA and Club Joy, we only got the whole 20 minutes, half hour, whole hilarious. I got it over already, but we got 20 minutes. I wasn't really a part of the whole three some I was facilitating. But honestly, if you told me, honey, I'm only going to get undergrad. If you go for a walk for 20 minutes, I would have. You have to understand, middle of the club, they're having some kind of dance off contest. She gets up there. Yeah, we couldn't take our eyes off. When do you find like the winner of the contest, the one that's in the spotlight and you look at them, you know, all eyes are on her and we looked at her. We're like, oh, that's the one we want. And then to have it fall in our lap was just uncanny. So we're not over here measuring the drapes with the alorty rule. I'm not holding my breath. That's going to just happen organically. You never know when it's going to hit again. It's just got to be something that's so once in a lifetime. He's almost got to have a movie star. Good looks. Yeah, because when you were talking with this guy, I actually told you to tell him when he was asking about the anatomy of a threesome. What's that going to look like to mention a lone time that he could get a little bit of a time? Are you serious with me just going out of the room, getting a drink, which is legit. What has happened the last two times, particularly with porn boy and Magic Mike, because that's all I've had really where you were like, I'll turn the other cheek kind of thing. But I've never said it ahead of time. You're going to get a little alone time with me. I don't ever say anything like that. It's more organic. Why told you that the evolution of that has been sometimes when you're making a sprint for the finish line for the grand finale, I like the grand finale. I'll give you a few minutes. So I'm not just hovering over you. Not for my grand finale, but they're the same for me. Yeah. I mean, you've been doing that for a long time. Cat will go in the next room and she'll take a phone call. She'll take a walk. It's nothing. I'll go get me some sweet tea. I've been doing it for a long time. It doesn't bother me. I know that the girls that we're with enjoy you a lot. It's interesting because you do have a certain segment of the girls that will say in words, they'll be calling back for me. Is this OK? Or Cat, Cat, where are you? What are you doing? Like they worry about me. They're being very sensitive to the make guarding that can be commonly found in a situation like that. They just don't understand that. Cat's a little bit more. A little bit more. Evolved than that. Yeah. We don't really have to be hovering. But Leo's not as evolved yet. But we talked about that in the feelings. The reason why. Well, and I said that the evolution for me has been, I almost feel like I'm paying you back. I almost feel like I owe you because. You owe me all the time with me. He owes me really big. Oh, I know. The scales are badly out of balance. We're on a weekend and we're doing nothing. We are doing nothing. It's a really vanilla weekend. You guys would be so proud of us. We've got a Vegas trip, though. On Thursday. Coming up. And it's a cat trip. Not a catfish trip. I know. Not a catfish trip. I like that. But you know what? When it comes to the catfish, number one, no matter what, at the very beginning of the interaction, you have got to ask for at least a couple more candid selfies. I don't care if they have six photos, like the full that you could have on field, I don't care if you're on Cassidy and they've 40 photos. You need to ask for another one because that is enough for them to be like, this was my photo 10 years ago. And you're not only doing it to see if the photos match, you're also doing it to see what their reaction is. It tells you a lot about their personality. If they have a chill personality, they're just going to toss the pictures out. Oftentimes not timed photos, even if they hesitate, they say, oh, I've got a bunch of pictures up there. That should be kind of a yellow flag. And if they say something like you send some first, that's an absolute red flag. So the bottom line with this guy, OK, we're going to call him. Well, he's not a Dutch talk fuckboy. He's a catfish. What really clued us in is today I asked him to send me that same selfie because I wanted to see it again. So we're going to give a little bit of advice. It'll be a little bit controversial, but I'm going to say it anyway. And it's going to come back and bite us. And I know it will, but it'll be OK. Yeah, probably will come back to bite us. The advice is this, when somebody sends you a timed photo that you really like, that's the caveat. You shouldn't do this for everybody. But if it's somebody you really got your heart set on, take a picture of the time photo with another phone. Yeah, we do it occasionally. So yeah, it's in my camera roll. Like, for instance, Dutch in Timberlake, he has never sent me a photograph that's not timed. And after like, I don't know, five times of sending it to me, I'm like, I wanted to show you what he looked like. And the reason you do it. So I took a pic. It's because the way your mind works is you're going to see this photo for 10 seconds. And in five days, you're going to just have this very fuzzy outline. All you know is remember he looked like for an instance, this guy, he sent one yesterday and we knew, OK, OK, it was really good looking. I didn't remember the details at all. All my head was knowing was I liked it. And I know it's going to come back to bite us one day because we're very guarded about sharing face photos. I know that people do take the photos of the photo when we send them sometimes because we've had people tell us that they've done that. But you guys that have our photos that are listening, you're all our friends. And so to be honest, it's OK. There has to be a certain amount of trust involved here. But I think it also dovetails to another thing in the same way that it's like a watercolor for five seconds. Oh, you know, you know, it's so spills water on. Yeah, it's like so ephemeral. It's like, oh, man, what did that look like? It's hazy. Five days later, you can barely grasp at it. That was that way for Dutch and Timberlake for months. I swear, like two months, I'm like, I think he's hot. I think I remember him being really good looking. And finally, I took a photo of one to show you and I look at it often. I'm like, oh, he's so cute. I love it. Your mind also does something of a disservice. And that is when you like something a lot. You are going to lie to yourself. Fixate on it. Yeah. Oftentimes, the less information you have about that, your imagination fills in all the blanks with all the ingredients. You know, when you've got photos of a couple and they're showing mostly just the female or the female in the male, but from this odd angle, you're just going to fill in the blanks as to what they look like, what their body looks like. But if you're not asking specifically for, can you just send me like a PG rated, you know, body picks, swimsuit pick, whatever the case may be, you're going to fill it in. And otherwise you might be surprised because your mind's going to make them Jacob Alorty and Margot Robbie. And that's why the anatomy of foiling the art of the catfish is really centered around not letting your lizard brain, your id outsmart you. And so greedy little id outsmart. Yesterday, we're going based on one front facing photo, one back photo and a whole lot of sexting and a real fuzzy. Another face photo. Yeah, he kind of looked like that. He had the same moppy blonde hair. Yeah. Okay. Okay. We foiled it today by asking for it again. We didn't even believe it was a catfish. We didn't ask for it because it was a catfish. I wanted to fawn all over it because it was so damn cute. He said something in response to you saying, why don't you just take a candid selfie of you after you've just gotten out of the shower? He said, give me a couple of days. Huge red flag. Huge red flag. So when we finally, I said, just resend the one you already sent. And he said, sure, he sent it. We snapped a picture. So just really, we could fawn all over it. And then we're like, they're not the same people. In fact, of three photos we had, all three were different. We're like, that's not the same chin. Wait a second. That's not the same nose. It's the same moppy hair. And he's making one of these duck face poses. Not a duck face. Almost like a silly looking pose when we finally pushed him. Can you just send me like a just, you know, something from your camera roll, just to get a selfie. Tongue sticking out. When anybody makes those funny faces, it's usually because they're trying to hide what their face actually looks like in resting pose. This was after he had said, I'll just send one more, you know, in a couple of days at this point, our hackles were raised. We're like, oh my God, I think we have been catfish. And then he did send another one, a real one. And then you said, he's not the same person. You know, can you send me a couple more? Because the photos that you sent thus far, they all look a little different. And I just want to know who I'm talking to, because I really love your sexting game. And guess what he did. You got the dreaded. So and so left the chat. Oh, gut punched. I still left it on there. I didn't want to delete it. I just want to keep reminding myself. Ironically, though, the first thing we did was we did a high five, because I think we felt like, well, we didn't get out smart. We sussed it out. Then we had to kind of dissect what the hell was he after? There's no way he was going to meet us in person because he doesn't look like these photos he's sent of himself. Sort of a fantasy, texture. There's no way it shows up in person. The first thing you're going to say is this is not the same guy. We decided, OK, so the photos clearly that were on the profile where we're like, he probably is like six, four, six, five. The photos there, he probably was six, four, six, five, because the one he sent us, he looked like he was five, 10, five, 11. Absolutely. And so this really goes back to foiling the art of the catfish. It's about trying to proactively take the shine off of something that you really, really have your heart set on because your lizard brain is doing its damnedest to fill in all the blanks, all the best things. A lorty rule based on the possibility of this guy who was a catfish. If that doesn't say everything, I don't know what does. And so then you have to protect yourself. We always talk about when we ask for photos, when we do texting, we are trying to create a three dimensional photo, a three dimensional picture of someone from the 2D facts. You can look at the things in the background. You can kind of really zoom in on things. You really need to suss it out. So then you are not surprised at that meet and greet. Well, what are some catfishes that we've had? It hasn't happened very often to us. This was our biggest oof. You know what's the most interesting is that we've never been catfished by a unicorn. I know. It's incredible because a lot of people say that is going to be the one you should be the most suspicious. You show up at a hotel room or at a bar and it's not a woman that comes out. It's like some dude or they don't show up. I don't think that happens. No dude comes out. Hey, hey, Kat. Hi, it's me from Reddit. We haven't tried meeting very many off the apps. We've met three on Reddit alone. Every one of them are real. We haven't met any females off a field. But you know what? I have heard it said bad amongst discussions that people said when they got catfished, it was most often it was a single go. Yes. And we have not met a single go off a field. That's just our playground. It's for the MFM's field is the MFM playground. Although we were talking about we had another couple. They slid into our DMs on field from Amsterdam. Really hot couple. Leo and I were like, yeah, I think we could do this. This could be a couple swap for us. Well, you know, the old saying is that in a threesome, it's easier to find that match because I can find you a Superman and I can find you a Wonder Woman. And in a four way match, you've got to find that elusive four way match, right? And we were talking the other day that one of these times the idea is to merge sets of three to a four. So we've got a unicorn. I bring in one of my single guys and we have this amazing time. But there's a problem with that. Yeah. The problem arises with you're looking for ridiculous guys. I'm apparently looking for people that don't exist. I'm looking for ridiculous girls. And if we bring them together, are they going to look at each other and say, wow, you're ridiculous. And instead of me being Batman, I'm going to be Robin. I'm used to being in the bedroom. We're on the lead singer in the band. I don't want to be the guy playing the tambourine. And all of a sudden Leo and I are going to be stuck looking at each other during this force of, I guess it's you, honey. We got into it for to get into this just so you and I could sit and roll around on the bed. Oh, we talk about strange, baby. That's just you and me, baby. Oh, it's you. Oh, it's you. So we haven't quite figured out how to handle that one yet. Well, the first thing we said is the Lordy. Because we got to get Wonder Woman away from Superman. That's great. That's great. We're going to get the invisible lasso. But see, I feel like she and I should be in the next room while you're in the next room with Superman with the catfish boy. But the problem is she's going to be peeking out in the hallway and saying, who's Henry Cavill? Where'd you get him? Can you come in here? Because she's like, I got you, Robin. And Henry Cavill is going to look at her and say, who's Barbie? I'm going to be like, what? I'm going to blow up in your face. You're going to think you're all E and M. And then you realize you're really just monogamous. Oh, honey, it's you. You're terrible at this E and M shit. But what we will do to start, we will turn an MFF into an MFF F and no doubt. He just wants to be one of these policy. So I was going to say, I was going to say token. We're going to turn an MFM into an MFM M. Are we? Yeah. Oh, I can't even get a good solid M. I get catfished. Those two guys will be next to you and they'll start making out. And then I'm going to go take a walk and get myself a drink. Like heated rivalry. That would be really funny. If they were like, if they were kind of like by guys, the next thing you know, they're all over each other. You're like, this is a bullshit. This is my face. I am the main character. Like one of those cartoon characters. You got the stick of dynamite in your hand and the fuse goes off. Speaking of characters, cartoons, we have just been told by some Icelandic friends of ours. You said Icelandic friends of ours. The way you said that was perfectly timed. Anyway, they told you that you look like American dad from the cartoon series from years ago, like with the big old gigachit. You talk about their guessing that that's what I look like. Yeah, they are imagining. I mean, you've got a really nice side profile. Every now and again, you can hear my my chin kind of scratching on the microphone. Because I got the seat put all the way back. So you can see we're trying to implement some rules of engagement to our evolving lifestyle journey, but they haven't quite been ironed out yet. They're sort of an unfinished, not fully formed thought. And couples are still in the ether. Like I said, we're back in Amsterdam. We're trying to get things going for our trip next month. And there's this couple really hot. But then it seems that she's like, oh, my boyfriend hasn't even seen your photo yet, but I'm totally in. She heard that we were going to be in town with an MFM with a throuple. And she said, I'm biased. Fuck. And I said, well, I'm biased. Fuck too. So we're going to get along great. Bifurious, you said. We are having this incredible interchange. And then when we told her we were going to have another girl there with us, she said, count by pussy in. And I think it makes us suspicious. I mean, they're fake too. Where's the guy? Because the guy was very, very handsome. He was in my wheelhouse alone for an MFM 100 percent. So under 30 and really handsome. And usually it's a guy showing a photo in a couple's profile of the girl. And then he's throwing that girl over the side of the boat by saying things like, she can't come. Oh, she's not going to be in town. We get that a lot. We have this one guy who keeps telling us she's taking her exams for the bar. And I think she's been doing it for like four years now. He talked about it. It was during Christmas break. I like a dude. No one is in school right now. It is Christmas break for everybody. That's a classic catfish where the guy presents as a couple because he thinks that that helps to qualify him to other couples. You know, with us, we were literally only looking for a single guy. So for us, we're like, that whole girlfriend thing was complicated. And that was a step we didn't need anyway. That's the irony is we're looking for the opposite. We're looking for the guy out of that couple, not the girl. So when she says, count my pussy in. First thing I think is this is like a catfish in reverse, which makes it seem even more catfishy because that's not really the kind of behavior here from a girl. And again, we haven't really delved in much with the girls on field. And they were kind of a ridiculous couple. They were there. He's a tattoo artist. She's the tattoo canvas. So now we're thinking after this whole catfish shebang this morning. I don't think they're real either. And then I went to look in field. You can have a little M that shows you're verified. And it means that you take a photo of yourself live. I'm just a little M. It's an M. I don't know. M for verified. I know, but people who haven't seen are going to have no idea what you're talking about. It's one of those. It's a little red button that basically shows you verified a photo on your profile like live. And how do you get verified? I don't know. Because we're not verified. Well, and that actually goes to something else, which is on some of these apps, there are people that aren't going to want to get verified. And so you have to have some latitude to allow for those people. Because otherwise, if you set your guard rails too tight, you might pass up some good opportunities. Now, we have friends of ours. You pass us up because video verification. We don't have a little verification. We're not going to do that. No. Yeah, they do like snap verification. We know friends that do video verification. We won't do that. But yeah, if I had done a video verification with this guy, we would have known right away. But I think that would scare some of your potential playmates away. So but in the end, he never got even remotely close to a meet and greet. Right. He didn't get any naked photos or anything. You know, whatever. That's probably a reminder to newbies. Be careful what you're sending to these people, because it could be some guy in a third world country who's trying to get some nude photos of you. We've actually had some couples that we know of that have been catfished and they've had people try to blackmail them. We literally know two people in real life, but that has happened to. We met them both on the apps. I think we've told these stories before, but it does actually happen where they then got their Facebook info and then they were able to see all their contacts. And one of them actually started sending photos or work colleagues. Like grandma is going to be like, OK, I am not prepared for this. There was another thing I wanted to mention. And it's funny because this was yesterday when we were pre catfished. And it's if you know, you know, I wanted to mention that. Like for us, we knew this is going to be a fantastic one. Well, essentially, it centers around if you go all the way back to the couple that we met on the East Coast, I won't narrow it down any more than that. And we were having drinks with them and then we went to the bathroom to talk it over. And we were at the bathroom talking for about five minutes, kind of like stanky leg. Yeah, he was another catfish. And it was because we were unsure. Normally, Leo and I don't even have to leave to go talk about it. If we know, we know. And when we went back, we decided to override our gut instinct and say, let's just go for it. And Stuart Scott had to step in because we shot our shot. I don't know about you, but we're down for playing tonight. And they said, oh, no, you know, we require some planning tomorrow. And that was it. That was enough for us, because we were not. If you know, you know, if we're unsure and you let the moment pass, that train is not coming back again. It is left the station. But if you know, you know, it's still going to be good the next day. It means that you should know right away. It shouldn't require a five minute discussion at the bathroom. I mean, somebody is settling to try to decide if this is a good choice or not. You and I should be able to look at each other wordlessly. And when you know, you know, this is where you're going to have the whole lifestyle percentages, the whole lifestyle equation, three out of four are going to be met. It's because you're not listening to if you know, you know, you are going back to the bathroom, discussing it for five minutes with your partner and deciding, let's just go for it. And that might be one of those three out of four that are met. Yeah. And we were saying that in a previous pod, at one time, we said that we're really good at identifying the hell. Yes. We're really good at identifying the hell. No. No. But we're not very good at identifying the good enough. In fact, when we said it, this might have been six months ago, we said we should probably try to get the good enough more often, because probably there's some riches to be had. We were most likely batten five hundred or less at that time. Talking about we need to try to get some of these good enough. Yeah, we needed to fill in with some good enough. Today I look back and I think that's not how I feel. I'm surprised that we said that back then. I'm surprised we did too, but we never really did wrangle the good enough. Did we? To me, I want them all to be hell yes. I do. I want it to be hell yeah. I'd rather sit tight and do nothing. Take the weekend off, have your dick in the hand and see if we get another at bat. You don't ever really have your dick in your hand because you've got all these ladies having your dick in their hand. I appreciate all of that. But Kat, on the other hand, I need some more dicks in my hands because I only got yours and that's not what I'm in the lifestyle. We're going to turn the lights off. Everybody's going to wear a mask and you're going to have more dicks than hot dogs down a hallway. But we have been catfish before. This was a big one because I so wanted it. He was just the entire package from sexting soft skills, EQ to really good looking enthusiastic. Besides this one, we did get catfish really bad one other time that actually we brought him straight to the bedroom. Deeper, any way steeper? Can I hit me steeper? You know the guy from office space? Yeah, that was him. He didn't look like the guy from office space. He actually by all accounts, he was a fairly handsome guy. So let me give you the anatomy of that one. That was when Kat and Leo, we were a little bit reckless. We were lurching. That's the problem. We would also at that time, we felt confident enough to bring people straight to the hotel room knowing that we know it all. Nothing bad can happen. Just come and give the secret knock at what I have in the morning on a Sunday night. Yeah, well, I could go wrong. That blew up in our face. He came to the door. We had never asked for more photos. Yeah, but here's the thing. We came across this guy later on. Yeah, months later. And we saw the photos and I paused on the photos again because he's a traditionally handsome guy in the photos. But he looked a little different. Yeah, he had changed. He had different hair. He had different facial hair. His weight had changed. He was quite a bit different looking, but his personality was awful. He was a piece of cardboard. Stabler. Can I say he had the stapler guy's personality. But I knew from the moment we saw him that I don't think this is going to work. But we didn't have our voice enough. At least I didn't to just say, yeah, I don't think this is going to work. Thanks for coming out. And we had him stay for probably about an hour. And it was a little too much touching and kissing going on. It was, first of all, a very soft and I wish it hadn't. And I still recall that at one point in the interaction, when you explained to him that we're a soft swap couple, a man of such high EQ replied with, so what? You don't fuck other people. And at that point, we were already done and we were like, you just need to go. We tried to be polite about it. He just didn't know any better. But that was a catfish because we didn't follow our own rules. That was where we realized that a personality actually does matter. And you can always say, no, you bring someone to your hotel room. I don't care if they drove an hour to you. You don't owe anybody anything. A personality matters unless they're ridiculous. If they're ridiculous, you can make it work because we had to make that work with Drago of Poison Oak fame. He had model good looks, but he had the personality of an NPC, but we still made it work. He had model good looks and I would see him again in a heartbeat. He gave you poison oak all over your body. Of course, you would have done it again. Bottom line, if they're good looking enough, we will make it work. Yeah. Say less. Yes. There's a lot of flavors of catfishing. The one we just had with Dutch Chalk Fuckboy was just completely different photos. There was that flavor. There's the flavor of, especially on the Swinger apps, Cassidy, SLS, S.D.C. The photo catfish where your photos are 10 years old. That reminds me of the masseuse. Oh, so he's on Cassidy. Yeah, that was a dirty one, wasn't it? Leo doesn't like the whole I'll give you a free massage kind of guy to me. That is a gimmick. Anytime a guy says I'm a masseuse, I'll give you a free massage. If they need a gimmick, what is wrong with them? It's just like the guy who says I'm really talented with my mouth. You can't get it up. People always accentuate their best feature and they hide their worst feature. So when I hear that, I figure they're hiding something. So he feels like he's acting as a masseuse because it draws people in and then it becomes a little more erotic, but he maybe doesn't have the gift of gab. He doesn't have the outgoingness, the personality to draw people in in the wild. I should go learn how to be a masseuse. I could add that. You could add that to your repertoire. Yeah, I like it. What do you think? But do you think other people are like us and would now hear that you're a masseuse? I know I just told people that that's terrible. You're cringe. But I, kitty cat, I get taken by it every time because I would like a professional masseuse to give me an erotic massage. My opinion is if you're a good enough lover in the bedroom, you shouldn't need gimmicks. That should just be part of your toolbox. Maybe you give massages, but if you lead by saying that in your profile, it's a red flag. We only did the whole massage thing one time. It was last year. Valentine's Day. Well, not a real massage. We have a massage table. Yeah. And you thought I don't need a masseuse. I'm going to bring me and this MFM, which was on my Valentine's Day, which was really nice of you, but you guys didn't give me a massage. It turned like erotic immediately. Oh, look, she's got all these places to put my fingers and I'm like, I want the teas. I want the slow burn and you two didn't get that. You guys did not get the memo. So maybe we should have got the catfish masseuse. I'm sure you would have given the teas. So maybe you need a little bit of massage school after all, because I need some of that. But the massage guy, he's on Cassidy. He doesn't show any face photos. And he's in Vegas. You know, I work for one of the spas, but I moonlight. I want to be real low key about my identity masseuse on the side. The reason he wants to be low key about his identity is because he might be, I think he says in his profile, maybe he's like 45, 46. He's definitely not. We had a friend of ours who actually made a date with him. And I think what it's supposed to be is it starts out as a massage that then leads to a happy ending with your girl. Right. If you're willing to do that, it could be just with your girl. It may even become more of an MFM. I think it's a little of a fluid thing and organic once he gets into the bedroom. So we got to the point where we saw the photos and we're like, you're a lot older than it says on your profile. Imagine a knock at the door and in walks a garden gnome with his massage table. How do you say no? And that is something people need to learn in the lifestyle is you can say no at any time. And they did say no, but I think they took the massage. They got the free massage out of it. It was, yeah. And then they veered off at the last second before it turned into a happy ending. Good on them for using their voice. But, you know, did you want him touching you at all? I don't know. You know, that's one of those things you have to decide. I think it sounded like a regrettable for sure. And we've had regrettables too. But yeah, that whole massage thing, that's the whole photo catfish. Somebody who showed you photos from 10 years ago. You need to be aware of that on the Swinger apps, especially always ask for more photos. Give me something recent. If it says that they've been a member for 16 years, you better believe their age is probably not valid because you have to actually on Cassidy and SLS, you have to actually change your age manually. And most people keep the photos they put on when they set it up. These are my best photos. Well, that highlights a different category of a catfish, which is somebody who it's the same person. It's just not the same person that's in the photo, which is what happened to us. We had catfish style number two. That was with Stapler boy. He was the same guy and he was attractive enough that we almost swiped on him again, but in person, he was not the same. And when they arrive, they're hoping that you've just gotten this far and you'll just go ahead and might as well just do it. And that again is probably why in the lifestyle, three out of four experiences are meh, because you wanted the one in the photo and that is maybe not the one you're getting trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. Because once you're in that meet and greet mode, it's just like going to a Swinger club, you know, we got dressed, we got a hotel at a Swinger club. You find reasons to say yes. I don't care who's there. You're going to find the best match for you and you're probably going to do something on an app, this whole swiping in the comfort of your home. You're going to find a reason to say no, but if you get to a meet and greet, you probably want to make something happen. You smell nice. You bought some champagne. You've groomed. You're like, let's do something. Imagine if the bar was only so high as to smell nice, groom and have a bottle of champagne, we'd all be getting laid. I'm buying a case of champagne. I still got my thing that says so and so left the chat. I'm so sad. Cat is so sad. I was so excited for this one. Stanky leg was another one that we ran into and that was a guy. He was like around episode 56. I think the couples and singles. He was given those photos that were filtered and a photo on a guy is a huge red flag. I know you girls sometimes do your filter photos, but we're kind of used to that. A guy doing it, you're like, you're supposed to look a little craggy and a little hard. And yeah, that looks a little like milk toast. Like I'm just, I've got milky skin. You're like, you know, everybody can see those filters from a mile away. And stanky leg was another one of those. We sat and had the drink. But when you're in the meet and greet mode, you want to make it happen. We're groomed. We have champagne and we smelled nice. You smell nice. So we want to make it happen. So we went to the bathroom together, even though I knew you didn't like it. I went to the bathroom. I excuse myself. I joined you. Decided here, you could go ahead and keep stanky leg company for a few minutes. You are not 90. 10ing it. You were letting the conversation die on the vine. I don't 90. 10 it. Then you know you're in trouble. So I decided I'm just going to go back with him. We had the little tent. You're not leaving me here with him. I'm coming with you. That's exactly what I expected. But we were so stupid. It was that if you know, you know, and we didn't listen to ourselves, we actually talked back and forth. Should we shouldn't we? As if it was even a question. It's just like that five minute conversation. We said no, but we shouldn't have had that conversation. When you meet somebody, if you talk in the first five minutes and there's no awkward pauses, you're not asking stupid questions about the weather. You know, it's going to flow into the bedroom. If it's good conversation, just in that first five minutes, if you have to sit and you have to have a discussion and do rock, paper, scissors to see if you want to go forward. Unless they're absolutely stunningly gorgeous. Then all rules are off the table and just go for it. Get that hot couple. Yeah, you can 90, 10, all you want. It don't matter. Just say less. Bring a ball gag. Bring a big bottle of champagne and some nice cologne. Oh my goodness. And in the case of Drago, make sure he wears some rubber dish gloves so he doesn't get poison oak all over your wife's ass. I know, I still have a handprint photo from that time. And you know, we've talked about that, about having like marks, like a hickey or a bruise that someone has caused, you know, like a handprint kind of thing. Who was kissing my neck though recently? Did they give you a hickey? And I said, I'll take the hickey. Was that LA woman? I don't remember. You have a lot of people kissing your neck. Somebody was nibbling on there and I said, I'd be down. OK, whoever it was, slide into our teams because we don't remember. All of a sudden, I'm going to start having people give me love bites. I don't care. I think it's kind of hot. It kind of dovetails into that whole sexy vampire fantasy. So I'm excited about some of the upcoming stuff we got on the horizon. We're going to go to Vegas and we're going to get cat a little bit of extra male attention. Yeah, this is going to be a no unicorn Vegas trip, which we haven't had in a long time. That's so sad. You're banned banned from the unicorn unless something really lovely falls in our lap. I never say no. And then I'll be taking a walk. Is that what you're saying? Yeah, the Lordy rule. No, because we have two possibles that are really possible. We have Magic Mike. Might make a return. And we have. I don't think we have a nickname for him yet. We won't give him a real nickname unless we actually meet him. Although Dutch Timberlake has a nickname and we met him. Yeah. You know, sometimes if we talk about it, it happens. So we're going to talk about it. So he slid into my DMs in January and he doesn't live in Vegas, but he visits a few times a year. We're going to be there at the same time. We'll give him a temporary placeholder. We'll call him Devil Goes Down to George. OK, George boy. Although the other day I saw somebody mention the devil goes down to Jamaica. Apparently, that's the thing on YouTube. You got to check it out. It's so funny. So instead of like dueling fiddles, it's dueling weed. And of course, the devil is going to have the best. I mean, come on, man. It's Johnny has the best. Johnny's got the best chicken in the bread pan, picking out dough. Granny does the dog by no child. No. He's not like you've had some of the devil's weed right now. I got the stuff that you smoke back in Vietnam. All that to say, he has really good sexting game, but it only lasted a couple of days. And then, you know, we're on and off. So I don't know if it'll pan out, but I know based on the apps, that's what he wants. He wants a three way, a three sum, an MFM. So I'm like, hello, that would be me. So we'll see if we seal the deal. Then we're going down to LA. LA is going to be awesome. We live. Oh, baddie. Who's never been to LA. We're going to show her a good time. We already have a bunch of things in mind. We're going to have so much fun. And that'll be no MFMs for me that weekend. So see, we're taking turns. In the next month, we going on a European vacation. We are going to do Europe up in a lifestyle way. Amsterdam, Paris. We're coming for you. Little baddie. That one's going to be epic. Absolutely. Cannot wait. So excited. It's for real. We've got plane tickets. We've all got we got some train tickets. Going to be fun. We're going to take a train, aren't we? That's fun. We are. And we got a really great place to stay. I've got some airbnbs lined up. See, I thought we should have stayed in a hostel. He wanted to stay in a capsule. You guys have ever seen the capsules that they have. They've got a great capsule in Amsterdam. It's basically like a half of a room. You climb up into it and it's just enough room to kind of lay down. Feels like some covered caravan that you see out of Oregon Trail. Only in Amsterdam would you have something like this with little ladders, but you can't have three. I thought it'd be even more fun with three. God, that would be hot. We could just rent two and we'll just all pile into one. I know, but by the time you rent two, it probably is the same cost as like an Airbnb. And then that's stupid because I want to catch it. I'm a cook. You're a nurturer. That's what you mean. I am. And I would really like to cook for a single guy. That's still on my bucket list. I should have put that on my bingo cards on my bucket list. Surfer boy. I'm going to give you a little bit of last minute advice on cat fishing. If there's only one partner talking in the messages, you need to make sure that other person is there and they're on board. But we don't like group chats. I know. I actually, I got myself out of a group chat recently. We got into one. Keep that shit in the group chat. And then I said, oh, I don't like the way this feels. Can I go back separately, please? I don't want you to. It feels so performative. You said it feels like you're like in a board meeting. Like in a Zoom meeting. And it doesn't feel sexy. They talk like in the chat. And you're like, aren't you guys like in the same room? This is just weird. So if you're going to text me, we probably got a text one on one. Didn't we do that in the last pod where I asked you a question? You acted like you didn't know. And I told you, we already talked about this. So stop bullshitting the listeners. That's what group chats are like. Yeah, that's exactly what group chats are like. Don't like them. OK, but still, if there is only one partner talking, just make sure everybody's on board at least by the time you go for a meet and greet. Just behave yourself or don't. Maybe that's more fun. You need to ask for more face pics and you probably need to ask for a body pic. That was one of the problems with stapler is, you know, I like a nice torso, but I got kind of a type. And so you need to ask for a full body pic of PG rated, you know, a bathing suit picture. And if they tell you they give a mean massage, make sure they have a big bottle of champagne. And they're grooved really, really well. That would be actually pretty funny, though, because we've said that before that in life, the times when things go sideways, those are the ones that make the best story 10 years later that you're telling more than when everything goes just right. You don't remember those quite as much as you do. When sex is on the line, you'd like things to go right. I don't really want to remember all the ones. Oh, I was just talking about life. Garden gnome masseuse. I don't think you have the right room number. I'm not sure who you are. Yeah, that could be how you get out of that one. That's a pro tip right there. Who are you? I didn't order no massage. I thought it was the Thunder from Down Under guys. What do you think about that? What would you do if I got you a stripper? Like a couple of them, they come in, maybe they got fireman outfits, and then they pull off the stripper pants. You'd like that, wouldn't you? I would love you forever. Yeah, okay, I'll say what I say. You know my type, though, because when you're walking in the casinos, they have some of those Thunder from Down Under, you know, Magic Mike guys taking photos and almost dimes to donuts. I'm not attracted to the ones that come along. Like they're juiced up rotisserie chicken. And they're not necessarily, that's not necessarily what I'm looking for. So I'm like, well, that's not really what I want. But if you found- You'd like a good face. God, if you found two for me, even if it wasn't like sex on the table, and they just like let me touch or they do a little touching, that would be awesome. But I don't want to pay the money for it. You know, speaking of that, there's a Jigolo service in Amsterdam. So I went to the website to go check it out. Yeah, I'll bet that doesn't do very well as a business. And I saw it's like 500 Euro for an hour. Wow. 600 Euro for like two hours and some of them are, they're not all young. So I'm gonna- I'm gonna open up a Jigolo service, I'm gonna do it for free. You're gonna jiggle over yourself out? Yeah, absolutely. I put my foot down. I'm not written you out. Why, you think I should get business? You know what? I'll work for tips. That's it. I draw the line of tips. Then I'm gonna rent myself out. Oh. Yeah, I don't think that's called a Jigolo service. We got another name for that. Leave the money on the nightstand, huh? That would be for you, the same. Leave the money on the nightstand. That's what Staplier wanted to do. He was what we call a leave the money on the nightstand kind of guy. It was, hey, I want some birthday sexo. I've got a coupon here. Where do I go ahead and redeem this? Aren't you like a slutty housewife? We say birthday sexo because we met a guy in Vegas. One of our last trips, I don't know, one of the last few, and he was from Italy. So I'm like, I love Italian guys. So let's meet him for a drink. And when we met him, that's why we say birthday sexo. He mentioned that it was his birthday and he wanted to meet someone and he was interested. He'd been to some swinger clothes before. And so he was just terrible personality, cardboard. So whenever he says birthday sexo, that's what we're talking about. He clearly just thought, because he texted us a couple of times a weekend. It's kind of like that thing they do in the lifestyle where the wife is bird-dogging for her husband and she always says, it's my husband's birthday on the Bliss cruise. It's my birthday, it's my birthday, I love you. Anybody who wanna come help make it a birthday to remember. Which by the way, one of the things that we do, because you know we love to follow the rules, is we go into restaurants all the time. Sometimes with unicorns. And we tell them, it's either our birthday or if we're with a unicorn, we'll tell them it's the unicorn's birthday. So they'll come out and they'll embarrass the hell out of them. Everybody'll sing. We'll try to get the whole restaurant in. It does not matter if it's your birthday whatsoever. It's much better when it's not your birthday. It's so much fun. So hopefully if that's the kind of people you are, then you are our kind of people. Oh yeah, we love that trick. So much fun. If you hang around as long enough, you definitely gotta have some fake birthdays at Applebee's. So let's say you get to a meet and greet and you have absolutely been duped. So just the meet and greet. Do you bail immediately? Do you stay for a drink out of politeness and do you play? Is this where you give the secret handshake underneath the table to let each other know? This is, I'm gonna be pinching him, Tori. He's like, ow, stop it, buddy. I'm going to get a Diet Coke, honey. Would you like an A&W Diet root beer? With a slice of lemon and lime? Don't do stupid things like that. You need to just have a real simple, like a tap on the leg. Most people tend to err on the side of being a little too nice. But we've had a couple instances where we've actually seen the person before they've seen us. And you can tell they don't know where we are in the room. And we've looked at each other and said, what do you think? Do we want to even go? We could just get up and walk right now. We could just kind of ghost in real life. I don't think we've ever done that, though. We haven't, but you know what we have learned? We don't always order a drink. We're like, I don't want to waste money because for us, we only drink if we're gonna play. That's a protein. We don't have a glass of wine. That's not our thing. But if we're gonna play, if we're gonna go to a party, we're gonna get shit-faced. Ha ha ha! Cat would like a little bit of liquid courage. But if I'm just having a meet and greet, that is just a wasted drink, in my opinion. Yeah, cat will get shit-faced on sweet tea. You know what's interesting about Catfish Boy, I just remembered? He asked me twice, what kind of work do you do? Was he gonna try to brain-brainwash? Was he gonna try to blackmail me? He was gonna try to blackball you. He was gonna brainwash blackmail me. Okay. I don't really know. I don't know what that interest was. I said that when he asked. Yeah, that was weird. Ha ha ha! Be some money on the nightstand for your birthday sexo. Ha ha ha! No, so what I was saying is, what do you do when you meet someone? If it's a couple, we would absolutely get the drink. I would never not order the drink. I would get one drink out of politeness. The one thing is... Or you're gonna make friends with them, maybe. That we oftentimes err on the side of being a little too nice. That's what I was gonna say. I was gonna roll this into being a people pleaser in the lifestyle. Mmm. It is so hard, especially when you're dealing with women or you're dealing with couples, because women are such, we're so nice, right? If you are a natural people pleaser in your life... It's very hard to say no. It can be difficult to find your voice. It's very hard to, you know, first you think you want to do it, and then if you change your mind, how do you reconcile that you've just disappointed someone? I've disappointed people and I don't like the feeling. We had a fake product that we came up with a while back. Called what? We had a name for it. It was a clever name, I forget. I don't even know what we're talking about. I can't front run if I can't read your mind. It was almost like the Chiffertatt Shit Test Buzzer, remember that? Oh, that's right! You were gonna have like a little vibrating ankle. And it would like kind of buzz and only we would know that it was buzzing. I'd have a key fob attached to my key chain and I would go ahead and press a button. And if it buzzed, that meant it's time to bail. Yeah. What was that called? I don't know. We would have made at least like a hundred dollars at it. Because it's hard. It is really hard. Well, because this has given you an opportunity to communicate without words. Without saying, we both have to go to the bathroom at the same time. We'll be right back. And you know, with the couple that I did that with, I came back and I said, as I want to do in a real flirty way, I know you guys were busy talking about us and we were talking about you. And they looked at us and said, we weren't talking about you guys. Yeah, I was trying to give them in the interest of full transparency. You know, we were talking about you behind your back. And I know you're probably talking about us and as well, you should. But, you know, it goes to this idea that the best advice I can give newbies is go super slow. Yes, you definitely need to find your voice. But in the end, your best tool in your toolbox is going to be doing the due diligence before you ever get to the meeting. And don't let your lead. Don't let yourself fill it in with so many fantasies, because I'm here to tell you you get into the bedroom and it is not rainbow colored glasses. Reality is going to set in. You're like, oh, this is probably not what I made it out to be in my head. You're talking about rose colored glasses. What did I say? Rainbow. It's even cooler. You were at EDC. I was a little better. It'd be great to bring. She would, you know, who else would be great to bring? Who? The couple to throw up a couple. Cory and Wilder. Wilder. Yeah. Oh, they'd be a great couple. We can now to them. Yeah, because we could like do an interview. Oh, I just. No, you can say that. Oh, we were thinking they would make a great interview. We've talked about only a couple people. We won't tell you the other person. Yeah, it's a great one. There were three, actually. Three. Yeah, there was this one. Yeah. And then there was another one. They were equally great. Cats off the mic over here, pantomimeing a blow job. Are you excited? That doesn't really narrow it down for people. You woke me up this morning. I'm five in the morning with some free use sex. Just take me while I was sleeping. I don't like that term free use. Oh, well, I was really cringy. Like who made that up? OK, you took me with some morning sex. I'm not yucking anybody's young. I know some people do that where they talk about I'm going to be in a hotel. My husband's going to blindfold me. And he's going to invite people into the hotel room. And I don't even know who did. Oh, boy, that is not going to be on our menu now. Unless they're all super hot and you've already vetted them. God, that would be really hot. So you're saying there might be a chance. There might be a chance. I have for you is nobody. There was another. You're going to see me coming and you're going to see me going. It was another almost catfish moment. We swiped right on a pregnant gal. Very pregnant. I don't remember that at all. OK, I. OK, I swiped right on her in Vegas. And her profile was such that my husband's deployed and I'm looking for some fun. We're E and M, whatever. And we thought, well, why not a couple? And we started writing a bit. It was really hot. And then I asked for some photos. So and so left the chat immediately. Our listeners are probably out there right now thinking the next thing you know, Kat and Leo are going to be saying if you're a listener out there and you're pregnant, go ahead and slide into our DM. We are not. We are not. That was very oddly specific. Call us. And then there was the catfish that should have been a catfish that wasn't a catfish moment. These are the only ones we can remember. Yeah, it was a catfish on a catfish of Rusky. Oh, we've recounted this before, but you know, he was Russian model. Good looks like so much so that we kind of hit ourselves on the forehead like what? We had the washboard ebbs and listen, we should have gotten body slam by the swingers. Gods, absolutely. It was too good to be true. And we didn't ask for anything except one more face photo and we're like, OK, it looks like the photos. OK, that's it. And we hardly had any sexting or texting. This was pre my sexting kink. And then we walked to the center bar and he was late. That was the first hitch. So we started walking. This is some guy over in a third world country laughing at us right now. So much so that we were on our way back to the hotel room like 30 minutes had passed. And I told you we were dressed. I really were. Group. This works out for you. Yeah, you didn't have the bottle of champagne. We had it upstairs. It was cool and chilling in the ice bucket. But then we heard. Apparently he had the bottle of champagne and he was at the center bar. Oh, my God. Yeah, that one. And that was your first. Should have been and that should have been a catfish. Absolutely. So that means it was really good. It was really good. So sometimes you can think it's a catfish and it turns out to be a Mount Rushmore. But we had to steal ourselves because if it hadn't happened, you know, we were going to just go back up to our hotel room and it was, hey, it's you again, honey, it was going to just have to be OK. It's a bullshit. Right now, my it is out. One penis fallacy. I need two penises. OK. We thought hustler Todd was a catfish when he first reached out. He reached out to us from like a hotmail address or AOL address. What a great thing you reach out to people. You want to hit them to send you photos or even do like a video call with them. This is going to be an out moment for us. Yeah. And so we ignored his email overtures because we do get a lot of unsolicited DMs from people where they'll try to ask us if they want to go on a reality show or they want us to interview with them. And that's just not really just ignore them. Yeah, because we're kind of press shy in that regard. But the hustler interview did drop. And if you want to check it out, it's on the website under our about us page. So I asked you some questions earlier. Do you bail immediately if you've been due? Do you stay for the drink? I think if it's a single guy, you can bail. Yeah. Or you can just sit there and have no drink if it's a couple. Couples are just nice. Inherently, it's a male and a female. It's a married couple. I would probably buy the drink. But don't order the drink ahead of time before they show up because a lot of newbies will do that because you feel nervous and you feel like I want a little bit of liquid in fact that couple that we talked about on the East Coast that we weren't sure about. They had been at the bar for maybe an hour before we got there. And they were already a few drinks in. I think they were toasty already. But what if we didn't show? You know, that would have sucked. Don't you? Yeah, you would have felt gutted and then you would have a bartender. But yeah, if it's a couple, generally speaking, couples are just nice. I probably order the drink because you might make a friend, which is why I want to leave it on this. I'm going to give a shout out to Vegas Dress Up Couple. They are some very dear friends of ours that came through the pod over a year ago. We've seen him on multiple occasions when we've been in Vegas. We don't know each other biblically, but we have flirted. It's very flirty, very playful, a lot of PDA. But the other week we decided to play matchmaker. We had another couple slide into our DM. Icelandic couple that thinks Leo looks like a giga chin. I think it's so funny. And we decided to make the introductions. Did they already meet them? No, they're not going into Vegas until May. And so they're already in touch with each other on Telegram because at the end of the day, lifestyle friends are just fun. It doesn't even matter if you play because getting a drink with a lifestyle couple is way more fun than vanilla friends. But it does go back to something we've said time and time again, which is, is it possible to be friends in the lifestyle without the sexy fun? I think that up till this point, we thought, yes, of course you can. I feel like the answer is no. Most people, when they feel like sexy fun is not on the table, the friendship immediately falls by the wayside. Pretty much with all the unicorns in our life. If we're not actively playing like within a few month radius, it's pretty crickets on the texting, right? It's really only when something's on the horizon or it's been pretty recent that the texting is a little more when it's hot and heavy, the friendship burns bright. Like Lana, we are still friends with her, but when there's no play on the table, we don't text very often. It just is the way it is. And it always feels a little sad because it feels kind of shallow. I would love to think that you could still be friends, even if the sexy funds not there. And up to this point, Vegas Dress Up Couple is probably one of our favorite couple friends in the lifestyle. I'd say they're our best couple friends at this point. And I just want to let them know that I think that you two are just good humans. They're really lovely people. And I've known them long enough now that the more I get to know about them, I like them more and more. We just adore you guys. And you never know. One of these times we might just be sitting around and we're like, you know what? All right, let's do this thing. We're just going to keep setting you up and playing matchmaker for all the couples who are going to Vegas. So if you're going to Vegas and you want to meet our friends, slide into my DMs and maybe I'll play matchmaker. And so until then, and all the listeners out there, you guys just keep staying true to yourselves and try not to get kept. So if you liked what you heard, go ahead and either subscribe or I didn't know how that works. I don't know. Just come and listen. We might post once a week. We might post a couple of times a month. I don't know. We might get bored and stop doing it. So you'd better come and listen while it's still going. Otherwise we'll lose interest. Tell us how much you like it. Yeah, that kind of comment. That'd be cool. We love it. Where can they leave a comment? I don't know. Maybe you'll have some comments. We don't have a website. Okay.