1460 - Handjobs, P***y Worship & Other Secrets To Satisfying Sex w/Alexa

The world moves fast. You work day, even faster. Pitching products, drafting reports, analyzing data. Microsoft 365 Copilot is your AI assistant for work, built into Word, Excel, PowerPoint, and other Microsoft 365 apps you use. Helping you quickly write, analyze, create, and summarize. So you can cut through clutter and clear a path to your best work. Learn more at Microsoft.com slash M365 Copilot. Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. The Craigslist is definitely like the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Singapore or Thailand. You cannot do it. The temptation is just too much. Real followers. Your friend know that you're begging her? No. No, he has no idea. And anything goes. The motto of the show, let your freak flag fly. Probably the only good advice I'll ever give you is to re-hide your wits and change. Here is your host, Kathy. Hey, welcome to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast with Kathy. If you want to follow the Strictly Anonymous Podcast on Instagram or acts, follow the show at Strict Anonymous. If you want to be on the show, it's called Strictly Anonymous because I change everyone's voices. People change their names. So if you have an interesting naughty secret life that you want to talk about while remaining anonymous or you don't even need a naughty life story on anymore, I'll talk to people with regular interesting life stories for my Sunday episodes. You could be on the show. All you got to do is send me an email at StrictlyAnonymousPodcastatGmail.com or go to my website, StrictlyAnonymousPodcast.com and click on be on the show. I also have a sexual health Saturday series. So if you have a really interesting health story journey that you want to talk about, email me as well. 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Now my private Discord is a place where everyone gets to talk to each other. My Discord is super fun. I have over 6,000 people that signed up over there. Everyone talks to each other. People are hooking up over there. We have a lot of contests. We have a dick pic contest coming up. Okay, you can win $350 bucks, I think is what I give for the contest. That is starting on May 15th and it will run for a month. So make sure to sign up to Patreon to get into Discord so you could take part in that. You could also get a link to my private Discord. If you buy my book, I have a new book out. It's called Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. That book is available in paperback as well as an ebook. And the audiobook is finally available for pre-order. It's hard to find because it's still on pre-order, but if you go to the description, the links to the books on Amazon as well as the audible book are in the description. And if you buy the book, just send me a screenshot and I'll send you the link to my private Discord. You'll love my Discord. Okay, it's great. You'll also love my Patreon. It's great. Last thing I want to talk to tell you about is I do have a great free trial that you could use for sdc.com. Sdc.com is like the world's largest online adult dating site, but it's so much more than a dating site. I mean, you can use it to hook up with people instead of threesomes and all the kind of stuff that people do on my show, but you can also use it to find out about meetups and events in your areas as well as learn stuff about the lifestyle. They have so much information on sdc.com. And if you use my code 37712, you'll get a free trial that's 37712 or just go to the description and click on the link and it'll take you right there and get and set you up with a free trial. So anyway, today I have an Alexa. I don't want to say her name again because in the middle of us talking, my, my, you know that went off and thought I was talking to her, you know, the A L E X A we all have in our house. It's kind of funny. But anyway, she is a sexologist. She's super fun though and very open. She's very young. She's very experimental. She's very open when it comes to sex. She loves eaters quote unquote. She says the word pussy in this cast more times than I've ever heard in my whole life as well as eaters. She loves guys to go down on her. We get a lot of information about her as well as, you know, what she does when she's talking to her clients or her clients or, you know, the people that she works with. She did want to come on and talk about satisfying sex and hand jobs and pushy worship. And we do talk about pussy worship worship and we do talk about that. She gives her techniques for a good hand job. She talks about how, you know, guys should can go down on girls and be better. We talk a lot about problems that couples have and why sex in the bedroom could go out the window and how to get it back in. This episode is full of so much good information plus a lot of like interesting stories from her and from me. You're going to totally dig it. You're going to love her. She's super cute and young. She runs her own podcast called In Bed With Alexa. I'll put a link to her stuff in the description. But anyway, I'm going to get right to and be right back on with Alexa. This is the Strictly Anonymous podcast. Strictly Anonymous podcast. Uh, hi Alexa. Is it Alexa Andre? Do people say first and last name with you? You are a sexologist. You are a sexologist. Let me tell you, you look like you're 21. You're super cute and hot. Oh shit. Alexa, turn off. Oh my God, your fucking name Alexa is kicking off my Alexa. Isn't that so funny? I'm not even going to edit that out. That's funny. Oh my God, you got it. I don't know who has to change their name. You were that person on my clock. Okay. That's fucked up. I never even thought of it. So wait. So, um, you look like so super young and you're super cute. You got a hot accent. Like at first, before we get into like what we're going to talk about today, which is sex, could you just tell me how and why you decided to get your masters in sex? Like I always like to get a little backstory on the type of people that wind up in this industry to begin with. Absolutely. Well, first of all, thanks for having me. Oh wait, you do have your own podcast and I'll put links to that. It's in bed with Alexa. I mean, that's, that's what you're doing now too. But anyway, give your, give your backstory. Yeah. So, and thank you for my looks. I do look like a fucking child, but I'm 28. Yeah, you look 20. I'll take it. Yeah. I studied psychology. Very young. I started university when I was 17. So I started very young and I didn't know what I wanted to specialize in. Right. So I was confused and I was looking into a few areas, but then I had a class called sexuality and pleasure. And I looked at my professor with such a fucking dumbstruck face and I was like, there's no way you get paid for this. There's no way you get paid to talk about sex. I talk about sex 24 seven. What do you mean? This is your job. And he was like, what do you mean? Of course, this is a job. And I was like, okay, then. So wait, you were, wait, so you were always the guy that you were always the girlfriend that it was always talking about sex anyways, what you're saying, right? Like that was like who you were. You like talked about it all the time. Always. The debrief after the house party was my favorite party. Yeah. Yeah, I guess. So he fingered you how many fingers? He sucked on your nipples. Yeah. How come you liked it? But Sarah doesn't feel anything. Why do you feel something? You know, like I wanted to know everything. Yeah. I was always that same way. I was always like just the lie. My day, cause I'm so much older than you. I think I like just talked about sex a lot because I got a lot of attention because of it, because in my day, nobody talked about sex. It was so like, oh my God, Kathy is like, so whatever. You know what I mean? I'm like, I got all this attention because I would just talk about anything. I didn't really care. But like, were you always like very also besides like talking about it, were you like super curious and adventurous like in the bedroom yourself as well? Always as like besides being curious about other people's stuff. Yes. I mean, I started. I guess I started making out when I was about 14 and then slowly I started, you know, including other outer course activities. And then when I started university, I was like, okay, it's time because I knew when I started having sex, I would never stop having sex. Yeah. But as an adventurer, it's like, I used to think I was, but looking back now, it was over a decade ago, I was having very mediocre sex, which is why my mission is to help people have it really good, satisfying amazing sex. Yeah. No, I know that you said you typically talk about like, you know, you like to talk about how people can have like the best sex ever. I know you like you put in two separate things. You're like, oh, I really like to talk about pussy worship and, and, uh, hand jobs for men. And I was like, oh, is that the key to satisfying sex for women and men used to the top of the mountain pussy worship and hand jobs? Because I did have a friend. I just can't tell you. Okay. I did have a friend and he was like Fortune 500 really wealthy guy. That traveled the world and fucked a lot of people. You could get basically whoever he wanted. He'd always be getting like these hand job, happy endings in places where it was legal. And I'd always be like, why would you bother with a hand job? And he'd be like, you don't understand Kathy. There's something about two hands and what they could do that no mouth or pussy can ever do. Like he would just talk about these hand jobs and how they was like the best thing ever. Cause I feel like hand jobs get a bad rap. It's like, cause at least I thought like, how, who wants a fucking hand job when you could have a blow job or something else? You know what I mean? They are so underrated. This is, I don't think they're the key to satisfying sex, but I love hand jobs. They are so underrated. Like when we're whatever age as teens, we graduate to blow jobs, right? So we stopped doing hand jobs and men are like, I can fucking give myself a hand job. Why would I want you just use your mouth? And I'm like the weight, the sensations that we can give as the giver versus the person who's receiving is the same as fingering. Like I can't finger myself the way other people finger me. It's impossible. Um, so I'm a huge advocate for hand jobs. They're so fucking fun. Let's get into hand jobs. Why don't we just start there? I mean, what, like, what are you so obsessed with hand jobs for? Because like you said, I mean, do you have special techniques? Like what, what do you, when you're talking about hand jobs, how deep into hand jobs do you get? Of course I have techniques. People are obsessed with techniques. Um, I just, I also think there's fun. You can do them in many positions. You can be sitting, you can be sitting on someone's face and giving them a hand job, you know, or you can be on their side. Like it's, it's the possibilities are endless. Um, but yes, there's a few techniques that people will go crazy and love it. They then like go insane and they spasm. And it's just so fun to watch and be able to give that to other people. Oh my God. Okay. So how, when you've like love to focus on, we're going to get to pussy worship too because you're very into that. So I think overall you do really love to help people. And that's what you do on your podcast. You talked to a lot of different experts as well, right? And bring them on to talk about everything having to do with sex. Correct? Yes. All kinds of people anywhere from sex workers to doctors to either, um, your average civilian, which you have a lot on your podcast, just to share their stories and, you know, for so people can relate. And so when you talk about like how to have like really satisfying sex, like where do you start that conversation off? It's a lot about the centering penetration. A lot of the times and seeing which, yes, which activities are actually pleasurable for all parties involved. Uh, clear people are not having as much penetration as we think. And their orgasm gap is much smaller. People are coming left and right when they're clear, that straight people, men are coming, women are not coming. And it's because we jump straight to penetration. So it's a lot of unlearning these beliefs that penetration is the most sacred and important part of sex. Trust me, it's fun. I love me some penetration, but it's not the main event and it's not what's going to make most of us come. So we're expanding our definition of sex and there's a lot of pussy attention in there. Clit. We love the clit. We love toys. We love pussy eating. Everyone should eat more pussy. The world will be a better place if people ate more pussy. Right. Um, so it's a little bit of that. Yeah. No, listen, I'm always like, make jokes because I love when someone goes down to me and I'm like, I could just like read the paper and have them just go to town for two hours. You know what I mean? There's just like nothing better. Do you know what I mean? And it's like, I don't know. It's very rare that I find a guy that's not into it, you know, but that would be like a deal breaker for me if I found a guy and he was like not into oral sex, you know what I mean? Because it is so pleasurable. And sometimes it does tend to be more pleasurable at a time, some of it for women, especially because sometimes they can orgasm for penetrative sex, unless their clit is done or, you know, it's like hard to have like an inside orgasm, right? Versus a clitoral or whatever. Correct. Only about 15 to 20% of vulva ornus can have internal orgasms or from internal stimulation. So most of us need our clit stimulated and look, if men needed oral to come, if men only came during oral, they sure as fuck would not be seeing anyone who wasn't obsessed with giving them oral. Exactly. Right. So I, real eaters only, I only hang out with real eaters. Wait, can you have inside orgasms? Like, did you learn how to do that in school? I, I've worked on it until I could and I can with certain toys, like a glass toy, for example, but I cannot with fingers, even though I can squirt, I don't come from it and I cannot, I not yet come from a penis only. Right. Perhaps in the future, I can come from a penis with a vibrating cock ring on, but not with just the penis, sadly, not yet. But you can though squirt or you can though with the toy, the toy could reach it. Yes. It's, it's, I don't know if it's a very specific thing and I'm tired as fuck with my hand, my forearm. I can imagine. I can't even get a workout, but I get there. But did you learn, like, did you learn in school? Like, is it that just, it's like an anatomy thing, like sometimes like maybe that, that part of the woman's body that needs to be stimulated to have an orgasm is in a position that, you know, she is harder to find than maybe somebody else's who's very able to have, you know, inside orgasms easily. So there's two things here. I think more people are able to have them if they put in the work and you try all different tools and techniques and things. Yeah. And according to the studies, now I'm getting a little science here. I like it. Yeah, I like science. The, the distance between your clitoris and your vaginal opening, if it's 2.5 centimeters or shorter, which is about an inch, then you're more likely to be able to have internal orgasms. If it's larger than that. Wait, who has? Yes, then you have a harder time. People have like their vaginal opening only one inch away from their clip. Yeah. Interesting. I have to start looking at pussy pics more and just start looking for ones that are so closely aligned. I've never heard that. I just always thought they're always about as far as my mind's not that close. Is yours? I actually haven't measured. I'm surprised. I'm, I, if I had to guess, it would be around the inch or 2.5 centimeters because I think I can sometimes and I can't other times. So according to that data, I, I would say I'm on the verge. Okay. Listen up as somebody who has already hit menopause and who's on HRT and someone who's into health and fitness. I love data, especially health data. 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Again, just go to the description, click on the link to get your personalized roadmap to sexual happiness. Yeah, well, I'm going to measure. Maybe I'm closer than I'm not. I'm just like imagining. I'm not looking at myself right now, so I don't really know, but that's I love that. I like that. I like that fact though, because that kind of makes sense. You know, I mean, a woman can kind of like gauge, oh, this is why it's harder. And is it because like you're like, I don't even know why it would be why that would even be. Did they explain why that's the case? Right. So because the clitoris has a really big internal structure, the part that we see is called the glands, which is the very little tip of the iceberg, right? And then the legs of the clit wrap around the vaginal opening. So the closer that is to your clit, the vaginal opening, then the more nerve endings from the clit are wrapping around it. So honestly, all orgasms are clitoral. It is whether the clitoris is being stimulated from the inside or from the outside. That's so interesting. I mean, listen, I've had Susan Bratton on my show many times and she like, you know, was really like eye-opening to me when she explained that like, you know, all of a woman's insides are like it has, we all have a rectile tissue like all over, especially on the inside. And that's why women need to be like lubed up and turned on for longer for, because for us to get erect, like a man gets erect, right? It takes longer, but we have a rectile tissue that can be stimulated and gets erect. Correct? 100% and you can see it. If you look at your vulva before you're touching yourself or doing a getting aroused and you look at it right after it comes or once you've been touching yourself for a while, it engorges. Yeah. It is three times the fucking size. Exactly. And it's like, what happened? And so swollen up. Yes. It's, there's, you're erect. There's so much blood in there. That's why you could come because you were erect. You were hard, basically. Yeah, totally. I love that. So now like, all right, you know, you love pussy worship, guys like K-Angels, we could get more into that. But like, what are the typical like reasons why people aren't having satisfying sex? I know that you said it's a lot because people think penetration is the end all be all, correct? Yes. It's also we fall into the routine. And if their routine is not satisfying in the first place, that is a recipe for disaster. The routine is normal. I mean, in long-term relationships, we will fall into a routine. Novelty should be added regularly. Yeah. But our everyday sex will be routine sex, which is fine. If our routine is a solid eight out of 10, and I'm coming as much as I want and everyone is unsatisfied, then who gives a shit? Yeah. But what happens is that our routine is at best three or four out of 10. And then we're having this mediocre sex and then we don't want to have sex anymore because why would we? Because it's unsatisfying. And then one partner's initiating, the other one's rejecting. And then it becomes a whole issue. And now we're not even touching each other anymore. We don't even kiss, we don't even cuddle. We don't do shit. So people come to me and they're like, we don't fuck anymore. And I want to fucking, they don't want to fuck. And I'm like, OK, let's back it up a second. And it's this cycle of unsatisfying sex, which leads to apathy, leads to cheating eventually. Yeah. Or we don't even touch anymore. We're roommates. We're like fucking asexual partners. Yeah. And then it can be an easy fix or it can be something deeper. The mental load in long term relationships has so much to do with how horny you are. If you're handling the household, if you have to remind your partner of every appointment, everything that needs to be done and bought and reminded of. And if only you take out the trash and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, you have you're not aroused. Yeah, no, I had a guy on recently and I'm airing his episode. It'll be up before yours is up. And he he was talking about and I'm sure you're like me, like just mesmerized by how hard it is for people to like have a voice and speak up. You know, for me, it's I'll say anything to anyone. I don't care, but I'm not the norm, you know, so I constantly get these people on my show, regular people that have like a very hard time just like communicating and being open and honest with their partners. I have a guy who's exactly stuck in your position and he's cheating on his wife right now because their love like their marriage is extremely vanilla. She doesn't even like oral sex. She won't do toys. He's tried a couple of times. She won't and you know, and he won't he won't tell her that he's bored because he doesn't want to hurt her feelings, but he's like cheating on her. I'm like, don't you think it's worse that you're cheating on her? Like, why don't you hurt her fucking feelings and be honest and just say, Hey, listen, this isn't working for me. I am kind of bored. Like she asks him, like, are you bored? And he says no, because he doesn't want to hurt her feelings, but he's like cheating on her. Like, how does that even make sense? I don't know. But like this is like this is the kind of shit that goes down. And I think it's very common, you know, a lot of times people don't are very uncomfortable talking about sex with their partners, you know, for one reason or another. It's a weird thing, considering that you're sharing every other part of your life with your partner that you're living with for 20 years and you can't fucking bring up sex. It's insane. It's the fucking bearded culture we will all race with. Yeah. And if you don't in the early stages, I talk about sex the first date. I don't give a shit. I want to know everything. And I want to know if you're aligned. I don't want to waste my fucking time. But other people wait, these couple that you're telling me about, they might have been married for 10 years or longer and they've never talked about it. Yeah. But we should all be talking about it. Day one. Let me ask you this, though, as a woman who's very, you know, you're being you're you were raised in a different time than me. And so like for me, when I was raised, I was very open sexually. I feel like I was like way ahead of my time. I was much more like the girls nowadays. I never wanted to get married. I wanted to fuck whoever I wanted. I didn't rarely had boyfriends, you know, whatever. And but back then it wasn't very common. You know, most girls when I was growing up and most guys like guys had to like have a girlfriend and girls had to be dating a guy to fuck him. Like that's just the way that it was. It was like a very different time. So if you showed up to a date and you're talking about sex like I was like you are now and you were like it gave great head because you fucked a lot of guys and you had no shame about it. You know, guys were like, oh, like I'll fuck you, but I ain't put in, you know, I ain't taking you home. Like, you know, it was like there's like this sort of Madonna whore thing where a woman that is very open sexually and everything. Sometimes a guy finds it hard to see her as, you know, something more than just a one night stand. What do you experience as a girl that's very like me? It sounds like, but yet you're being raised in a different time. Like how do guys feel about you talking about sex on the first, you know, date and being so open about sex and being a sexologist. Are they intimidated? Do they like, you know, how do you get, how do they treat you? Yes, it depends. They can get very intimidated, which can be good or bad. I don't mind that intimidation. If it means you're going to bring your fucking A game. Yeah. Or sometimes they will hyper sexualize me or fetishize me and they're like, Oh, my God, teach me everything. And I'm like, I'm not teach. I don't want to teach. I teach for a living. What do you mean? Like you teach me something. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. But we I was raised very Catholic, very purity culture. I had to break away from all that. My parents locally broke away from that. No one's religious in my house anymore. So it was a process for all of us. I was called a slut when I was 14. Well, that's what I mean. Yeah. So they were existed for you too. I 100% I gave two blow jobs at one house party and I was called the vacuum for the rest of high school, which is crazy. I just embraced it. I was like, you wish you were me. You would have been the biggest in my time. Oh my God, you were sluttier than I was two blow jobs in one house party. Oh my God. That was great. But like I didn't, I also didn't, I was 14. I didn't know shit. I was just like, yes. And then the other guy, I knew both of them. And he goes like, do you want to suck me through? And I was like, yeah, whatever. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm sure. Yeah. But like, were you surprised though, because here you are this girl that you don't have any shame about it. And you're just doing sort of like, you know, you're just being you yet you're being like, you know, society is putting that on you. You know what I'm saying? It's like weird. It's a hard place to be as a woman. And I feel like, you know, guys put this kind of shit on women and they only do themselves a disservice because then more women are afraid to sort of come into their own and be very sexualized beings because the biggest fear is you will be called a slut. A hundred percent. It's they, they want the slut. They want the closet at flood. Yeah. They want the Mary who's only a little whore for them. They want her to be a virgin, but they want her to know everything and suck dick like in porn. And it's like, choose your fucking lane. Like you can't have it all. Yeah. Um, but honestly, if you're listening and you are, are in anyway close to a man who thinks that look for something better, like no one should be asking your body count. No one should be shaming you for your sexual experiences. No one should be shaming you for being sexual and wanting pleasure and wanting to have really good at mind blowing amazing sex. You do you and fuck everyone who thinks otherwise. Right. But do you find though, because you're way younger than me and you are only 28 and you're living in a different time that there are plenty of guys that are totally cool with it as well. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I know. Different world, right? Yeah. Different world. And I fucked most of my long-term partners. I have fucked them on the first date because I fucking wanted to, you know, or second most the third. And I think I've never done that in my life. It doesn't really mean if you fuck very fast that, you know, you're a whore and not wifey and that you're unusable. You're undatable. That's not a thing anymore. Right. It's not the rule because these guys still committed to you when you were in long-term relationships with you, even though you fuck them on the first date. Cause there are all these rule books like, Oh, don't ever fuck a guy first date. He'll never take you serious or, you know, he'll never like you. My sister fucked her husband on the first date and she's married to him like 35 years. You know what I mean? Yeah. It doesn't, it's anything's going to deter you guys being official. That's not going to be the one thing. You fucking whenever you want to fuck, it's not going to, it's not going to deter you. It's not going to throw shit in the wrong way. It's going to be fine. If you want to fuck, just fuck. What was your, do you have, are you a monogamous person in your relationships or are you non-monogamous? Like, how do you roll? I've been non-monogamous for years now until I was so fed up with monogamy. I never felt right in monogamy. I felt in jail. Um, I felt trapped like I couldn't fully be myself cause I'm so flirty and open. So I've been non-monogamous, um, since I was, what the hell was I, uh, 23, 24. And so I'm assuming because you're so open that you would just like put that out there right off the bat with guys that you were dating. Yeah. Well, I was in a relationship monogamously when I figured this out. Oh, cause I had a partner, we lived together and I lived in Spain, but I came home to visit and I went out with a friend and we had had sex before, but we were having brunch and I was like, I really want to at least flirt with him. I would love to have a little make out session, but what do you mean? My boyfriend, I know he wouldn't like this. So what do you mean? I can't be myself and do whatever the fuck I want. Just because I have a boyfriend. So I don't do anything cause I don't like to go behind my partner's back. Not my thing. Right. Um, but I get in my car and I call him and I'm like, we need to talk and he's like, what's going on? And I just blurred everything out. I'm like, Hey, I feel trapped. Like we need to open up and don't do it the way I did it. I was just panicking. There's better ways to do this, but I just told him and we, I straight up was like, I need us to do more than be monogamous because I am not happy. Okay, guys, I have the best product to tell you about that effing works for your jazz. Okay. And it's called load boost. Load boost is not only going to give you bigger loads. Okay. They're going to be better tasting too. Okay. Load boost is not some sketchy supplement. It is made by a VB health and it is doctor formulated. It's also a great vitamin for prostate and sperm health. 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Uh, one to two years, I'd say, or even an ongoing, but I have not been yet in a non monogamous, long committed romantic relationship. Why do you think you think it's cause you're just not down for that right now? Cause you're super young and you're not really that interested or is it, is it hard to find a guy that will align on those, you know, and have that kind of relationship with you? Yes. I think it is hard to find. I also think I have extremely high standards and I love my single life. Yeah. I love my life. So people need to add to it and not take it. And I think the really good men I've met, they're already partnered. They are married. Um, I also find every man I kind of like wants to have children and I don't want to have children. So that's immediately a deal breaker for me. Right. And you're kind of at that age, if you're dating guys like in their 30s, or if that's what they want, you know, they're looking for a partner that that's going to be in the future. So it's going to be a deal breaker for them too. Right. That's a date one question. I'm like, do you want to have kids? Yes or no. And if they say, yes, I'm like, okay, well, I have a nice sign, but this is not going to go anywhere. Yeah. And listen, that could change. You never really know. You're only 28. I always, I have this thing called marriage math and like I was like you in, and in my day, everyone got married, but I was like, I never want to fucking get married. It was never like a fantasy of mine because I was always, I'm a little slightly claustrophobic, you know, and I would like think to myself, cause like marriage math is this, like say you think you're going to die when you're like 80 or 90 nowadays, you can write. I plan on living to 100, you know, take that, take that number and then minus the age you are when you get married. And then whatever number you're left with is how many years you're going to be with one person, one fucking person. I was always like, how could I stay interested in one person for 50 years or 30 years? I like couldn't breathe at that thought, you know, but some people, it's totally fine for them. But I think what's most important, and I always say, like my favorite saying is like know thyself, right? Like just honor whoever you are, right? No matter what anybody else says to you, cause a lot of times people that are dying to get married and want long-term relationships, they look at people who don't like, what's your problem? Like, you know what I mean? Like what's wrong with you? Like why have you never done that and everything? And I think we're just all kind of wired differently. Yeah. And we, and we're all allowed to change our minds. Exactly. Like if we talking a decade and I'm a completely different person, that's totally valid. Not only is it, we change and we grow. Yeah. Not only is it valid, isn't that the way you're supposed to be? I remember like when certain like celebrities and you know, like change, like Madonna and Angelina Julie had like babies and they were like moms and they're like, oh, how could they do that? They were like taking off their clothes and they were like nudists and they were doing heroin. Like it's like, yeah, that's what they were doing back then, but they like grow and change. Like that's normal. You know what I mean? Like that's what you're supposed to do. Who's like this person their whole life? I think that would be very sad if in 10 years, even five years, I'm the same person. What do you mean? I haven't learned or changed anything. That's depressing. Yeah. No, totally. I mean, I had a kid when I was 46 and totally changed my whole life. You know what I mean? And it was like great, you know, and I've just been very different people at very different times in my life. And now that I'm older, the thought of having like a serious long term relationship is not as claustrophobic for me because we're not looking at 50 years anymore. You know what I mean? It's way less size, it's fine. And I'm sorry to say this, it's not happening to you yet, but with the older you get, it's like very bizarre. Like life, like a year goes by in like two fucking seconds. So 10 years does not feel like eternity. It feels like two seconds. It's like sad, but true. But let's get back to like you as a professional, you know, so you, you do, you are a sexologist, you know, and so you do see couples and we do want to talk about like how to have satisfying sex. Like when you get that couple that comes to you or even the partner that comes to you and talks about this issue where they're not satisfied in the bedroom and they're not having sex, like where do you start with that couple and what kind of advice do you give them? Yeah. So I want to, I want to know their day to day life. I see couples or people by themselves, which is harder because I'm like, I want to talk to your partner, but what do you mean you're telling me everything from your side, but I can't hear their side. It's harder. So I want to hear a day to day. I want to hear what the last few times you had sex, what did that look like? Exactly. What did you do? Who came? How did you initiate? How was the warmup? How did it all end? How was the aftercare? I want to know everything. And then we start on packing. Like how do you get along? What's going on? What are your recurrent fights? Who's the initiator and who's the receptor? Who's the one rejecting all the time? What's going on? Has there been infidelity? Cause that changes everything. Yeah. But do they admit it when their partner's sitting next to them? How do you get to that honesty? Well, if it's out there and they're working through it. Yeah. I've also had couples that they find out as we're in process, like session four. They're like, I found out he cheated on like, holy shit. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. So it depends. Every couple, you think my, our job is the same thing every fucking day, but it's everyone's so different that every situation's unique. No, I know. That's why, listen, I've talked to over 1400 people on my show. I've been doing it for like 10 or 12 years now, I think. And I could talk to, you know, I have cheating stories on my show because I think people learn from it. I have hot wifing stories. I have threesome stories. I have every story you could imagine and I have every story like 10,000 times on my show, but it's always unique and specific. Not every cheating story is the same. You got to dig it and get those details to really know how to like, you know, help somebody. What are the typical complaints like that men have versus women, you know, like maybe like top three for each one that you typically hear? Yes. Usually men are the initiators. Women are the rejecters. So I get a lot of men emailing me and they're like, I want you to fix my wife. And I'm like, okay, let's, let's, let's hold on right there. And then I dig into it or I talk to both of them or just the wife. I like to have a session with the husband, the wife, and then together. So the first three sessions, that's what they look like. And then I talk to the wife and she's like, I literally do everything. The sex we have is awful. So why would I want to have sex? And I just have no mental capacity to think about sex. And the way he touches me when he wants to initiate, he just like honks my titties and he expects me to be aroused and be all ready for him, for him to pump me three times and he comes and I'm just laying there. And I'm like, okay. So, you know, everyone's side or everyone's reality is different. And it's all valid too, though, right? I mean, it is valid. Yeah, yeah. Both sides. The husband who, from his perspective, he's initiating, he's trying, he and his brain playfully honking his wife's titties so that she knows that he is interested or looking for connection. And ultimately, these people are looking for connection. And this is what we forget. This is the biggest disconnect that I see in couples is that the person who is initiating, we assume that they want to fuck. But in reality, they might just want to connect. Yeah. And that's the way that they know how to connect. But what I like to tell them is explain this and then say, hey, you might not want penetration, but what do you want? Are you open to a hug, cuddling? Are you open to kissing? Where in the scale of nothing get the fuck away from me? And oh my God, yes, let's have sex right now in the kitchen counter. Where are you? Yeah. And then you tell them, hey, I'm at a two. And I want a little peck on the lips, maybe some holding, and then check in and tell me, ask me, and I'll tell you if it's still there or if it's a little bit higher and what's going on. So I like the scale because our partners want to connect. And the more we reject them, the further away we're pushing each other. And that is truly just not the recipe for success. Yeah. And a lot of times I think it's just the fact that like men don't understand women and women don't understand men. There was like an old school book called Meta from Mars, Women Are From Venus. And it was like so fucking good because it is the truth. And but they need to do one like the same exact book. But when it comes to sex, because I feel like, you know, if a woman walked in after work and went up to her guy and grabbed his dick and said, let's go, like that's like the way he grabs her tit and lets her know, like that's he's doing what he would like. Yeah, he's doing what he likes. Just like the woman's like, you're not like talking to me before I need that. She's, you know, she's doing what she wants. Like we're always like sort of projecting, you know, and I feel like if men had a little bit more understanding about how women roll and how they get actually aroused and interested in sex, things and vice versa, it would be different. You know, what is the way that men get aroused versus women? Correct. Yes. This is such a great point because we do project like you're saying. And men have a hard time understanding that normally on average, women need a lot more time to get aroused. We tend to have what is called responsive desire, which means. We respond to small cues. We respond to a massage. We respond to, oh my God, we have date night on Friday. I'm getting ready and just the shower to get ready, getting dressed up and seeing you across from me at the dinner table with nothing else on my mind because all the chores are done and we're having some flirty talk and you brush my leg behind under the table. That is all foreplay. Yeah. Men have a hard time understanding that foreplay begins as soon as sex ends. Right. So we need our brain stimulated and we just slowly build up to being like, OK, penetrate me, right? But you can, as a woman, grab their dick and be like, fuck me right now. And they're like, oh my God, yes. Yeah. And they're completely erect and totally ready. They're ready. That's how they're wired. Yeah. Yeah. And that is called a spontaneous desire. Oh, you send them a note and they're like, oh my God, fuck you. I'm going to jerk off to this right now. Yeah. And you're like, OK, so any small stimulus. It's that a word? Oh my God, any small word like it's yeah, stimuli or whatever, any kind of small yeah, thing, any small gesture will arouse them and they're ready. But we need a build up. We need warm up. And that is one of the biggest disconnects as well. Besides having this rejector initiator, it's just not understanding that the build up is truly crucial. And I feel like, you know, not only do guys not know that, especially because also like in porn, it just always looks like the woman's already willing and able. I think sometimes women, you know, think that they're supposed to be aroused quicker than they are to, you know what I mean? I think even women don't understand that it's normal to not be aroused right away. And then it gets, you know, because it's so much, we're so much more in our head than you feel bad that you're not ready so quickly. And then, you know, and not just snowballs and it doesn't help the situation. So I think even women need to know that it's normal that it takes longer for you to get aroused as well as get erect and have all your insides plumped and ready. A guy gets hard in two seconds. There's that's a big, there's a big difference and a big disconnect. But it's real on both sides. Yes, it's completely normal, common. And we need to start advocating for this. If someone, if he's ready and you're not, you need to be like, legs are closer, like I am not prepared. I need more buildup. And which is why we always love to say she comes first and Ian Kerner, I love you. He, his book is my Bible. She comes first. And if she has had at least one orgasm, we know she's fucking ready. If she is able to come, she's ready. Right. And is that what that whole book is about? Like get her at that place and then she's primed up. It's mostly, it's honestly, Ian is one of my guys. He's a real eater and it is. Eater. I'm so funny. Everything. All the mindset of why it is so important to eat plus the techniques, how you can calm her down and reassure her that you're eating it because you fucking want to and not because it's a chore. Oh my God, yeah. And he explains arousal. Like he explains all of it. It's truly my Bible. I make everyone read it. I used to have it on one of my dating profile. Like if you haven't read this book, don't fucking talk to me and everyone will buy it. Yeah. So if you haven't read, she comes first by Ian Kerner. Guys, I recommend you. Well, you need to write the book about how to give like how he gets a hand job first, you know, maybe that people need to know how to do that too. Because I do believe whether it's a, you know, a guy going down on you or a girl giving head or a hand job or anything, like it's never hot if you feel like they're doing it because, you know, they want to, like I said, it's very rare for me to find a guy that's not like devouring me when he's going down on me. Like most guys really love it, right? But like every now and then you find that one guy that you're like, he doesn't really like that he's doing this for me and that's not hot. Like that's not even fun. You know what I mean? I'll still take it because it's like bad pizza, still good pizza, right? But it's not like the same when a guy like really loves it, you know? And say what's wrong with a girl? I can stop them. I'm like, what are you doing? Like if you're... I'll still take it. If they stop, like if they only go down on you for like two minutes and then they stop them like what the like no, then please. Yeah. What do you mean? Two minutes, fuck off. Yeah. But it's the same thing with a blow job. You know what I mean? It's like, if you know, I typically, I think a lot of times it's not a coincidence that the women that give great head or the women's that like giving head. You know what I mean? Like it's a it's a thing. Like they actually enjoy it, right? And they absolutely. And for whatever reason, some girls like a cock in their mouth. Some girls like, you know, their ego to be fed to know that they're really turning someone the fuck on, right? Like whatever it is, if you like doing what you're doing, it's going to only make you better at it. Yes. The difference between blow jobs and eating pussy though, is that he's going to come anyway. And we are not. So eating pussy is more important. And also eating pussy is less tiring than sucking dick. And I think so. Absolutely. I am a bisexual girl. I know what it's like. Yeah. But don't you think you could get a guy off on a blow job so fast? It doesn't take long. Yeah. You never, I'm sorry. I will make my guys go down on me for a very long time, but I am never blowing them for as long as they are going down on me. Sorry. Never. No. And, yeah, you've never heard a man say, oh my God, that's enough. Stop blowing me. Only they're about to come. No man has ever been like, oh, that's too much. I don't deserve this pleasure. But we as women, we feel like we're girls. We feel like we taste bad. We feel like we're taking too long and we stop them. So I'm just an advocate for eating pussy all day, every day, just eat your woman's pussy, guys. And, but what about because I hear this from a lot of guys around my show, they are guys that love their eaters, as you would call them, quote, I don't really like that word. It's not hot to me, but you like it. Okay, eaters. Okay. Good on good. Like, but their girls don't like, there is a girl, there is a type of girl out there. And I've heard this more than once. It's not like very uncommon. That doesn't want their guy to go down on them. Like, what is that all about? Yes, it's, it's this conditioning that we were, I was, I was that woman, but not because I didn't want to. It was because I felt like I was incommuniting them and they didn't want to be there and I was taking too long and why would they eat my pussy if my pussy is gross, right? So, or, or no one's eating their pussy correctly, right? It's never felt amazing. Right. So there's three things that the eater or the devourer, whatever you want me to call them, call something a devourer. Should do. Yeah. Right before eating pussy or right after the first few licks, there's three things, and this is Ian Kerner's words, not mine. I'm just paraphrasing here. Yeah. You reassure them that you're doing this because you want to be there and not for their pleasure. Like there's no rush. Yeah. I am here for me. And the hottest people out there is that when you've already come in there, like, okay, but I'm not done. Yeah. I'm eating it because I fucking want to. Yeah. That's number one. Number two, you taste incredible. Your scent is intoxicating. I'm obsessed with you. This is the best, this is the best meal I've ever had in my life. Yeah. If it's not true, okay, we need to make some adjustments, but hopefully it is. And you need to understand that pussy needs to taste like pussy and not candy or whatever the fuck you expect it to taste like, but re-reassure. Yeah. And if you are the vulva, if you're the receiver, taste yourself. I taste myself to make sure everything's fine. Oh, yeah. Of course. I stick my fingers up there. All right. Someone's finger me. I grab their hand and I fucking put them in my mouth because I want to make sure everything's fine. And that calms me down for when they go down on me. And I'm like, now you can go down on me. And the truth is, okay, as a woman, I know this, like, you know, most of the time, unless you have a problem, you're never going to smell bad. Like you're always going to be, like, you know what I mean? Like I've never smelled bad in my life unless I had an infection. You know what I mean? Like a yeast infection or something or else. Or, but, you know, if that's not happening, you know, you're never going to have like a terrible smell for no reason. At least I don't think so. I never have. Yeah. I guess just a lot of people just don't know when they have BB or they, you know, have in shower and they're gross from the gym, which a lot of people are into that, by the way, you just have to find the right people or you are just on your period. You know, but just get yourself a little vampire. Also, people are into that. You just have to find the right people. Yeah, I was just having it because I put this question on my Patreon. And I just had this question with Billy from the Man Who podcast because I was like, I was very surprised because sometimes when I would be with a guy, I always have like long term booty call guys. I'm very comfortable with them. And like, you know, when you have your period, you're extra horny, you know what I mean? So I'm not going to be like, don't go down on me. So I would just like go in and put a tampon in a fresh one, you know what I mean? And they go down and there's no problems. Nothing's coming through that fresh tampon, you know what I mean? And whatever. And I didn't realize how uncommon that was. Like when I put the question on my Patreon, so many women were like, I would never and never have. And so many men were like, I would never and never have. And I'm like, not one guy ever said no to me. I don't understand it. How do you feel about that tampons? Like for oral, like when you're with it? I fully agree. Someone is not willing to eat my pussy when I'm on my period. You don't deserve to eat my pussy ever. You find a lot of guys that are not into it. I feel like it's very few and far between. I I'm not really. I think everyone I've actually, it would be an ic for me. Like what do you mean you're grossed out about my body? Naturally, that's it's just blood. Grow fucking balls. Right. No, you're not. I have met one of my guys. He's like actually like terrified of blood. Like he has like a little phobia and I'm like, OK, whatever. Yeah, that makes sense. I'm not really disappointed with him, but I still like give him shit for it because what do you mean? Yeah, it's just blood. Yeah, I couldn't believe. And listen, when I would do the tampon thing, like nothing would even come through. But it was very interesting to me. I like to do polls and see like how everyone feels because I thought it was like kind of normal like anyone would. And I couldn't believe how many people were very sort of opposed to it. You know what I mean? Like it's kind of interesting. Yeah, I'm sort of obsessed also with like people who won't swallow. And I have, you know, I'm like, what do they do with it and all that kind of good stuff? But let's get I mean, do you want to talk a little bit about hand jobs? You've talked a lot about pussy worship. It's never anything more. Oh, my God, you're so funny with your oral sex talk. But I'm just my I want everyone to become a real eater, you know, even though I actually I'm not even sure if they can be taught or not. Well, no, I know I'm going to tell you. No, no, no, I think it can be because I have I've had a lot of guys go down to me. And it's like, oh, he's great, like whatever. But then I have this one guy who had every flick and move and in the and he pulled everyone out every time. And I'm like, what the fuck is going on here? And then like I started getting educated as my sponsor and they have like an oral sex course and I looked at every single one they show like the guy doing it. And there's like so many different moves that actually you can learn that's totally going to change the game. It's not just the same fucking movement all the time. You know, I mean, most guys have one move when I'm at this guy and he had like 10. I was like, where the fuck did you go to school? Like, what is this? You know what I mean? It was like the greatest thing. But there are different moves and not a lot of people know. So I think it can be a learned skill. OK, yes. And I love educated. I've worked with them for years. Yeah. Love you guys. But I differentiate good technique and either I've had men who are incredible techniqueers, but they they're not they're not devouring me. They're not doing it for their pleasure. They're not they're not happy down there for half an hour. You know, they just maybe wait for you to come there like, oh, fine. Finally, we can talk. And I'm like, no, like you should be you should want it more than I wanted. And I really fucking wanted. Yeah. So those are my true real ears. But if you're not a eater, you can be a really good at technique like you're saying, go check out educated and yeah, learn. Yeah. And I do think and I say this a lot on my show because, you know, a lot of times men get about rap on like, oh, they're so selfish and they only care. But I typically find and sometimes it's kind of annoying because they want you to come like five times, but I typically find that a lot of guys, you know, or they're very much into pleasing their women. Like your pleasure is their pleasure. They want you to get off and get off as many times it makes them feel good about themselves. You know what I mean? Like it's like, like I said, sometimes it's like annoying. Like I can't come for you five times in one night, but like they would do it if I wanted to, you know what I mean? They love sort of pleasing and I find that a lot of guys are like that. They really want their wife to orgasm. They want and I think it's about communicating. Like if your guy isn't making you, maybe you need to speak up and tell him what to do. A lot of times I think women don't like, they might know their body, right? But how does their guy know their body? Not every woman's body is the same. So he might not know how to go down on you or finger you in the way that you like. You got to like speak up. Yeah. And so many of the things that you're saying are so true. I do think that there's a communication issue. And I also think you have a very good filter because there is a lot of mediocre sex out there and really selfish lovers. I think you filter them out very well. Yeah. Maybe I just go for the egomaniacs that just love to like, please, you know, because like making them feel good. But I also don't like, you know, now that I'm older and after I quit drinking, I don't like, and I have like long term booty call guys. I don't really like a lot of variety. Like I'll fuck the same guy in between boyfriends like for a very long time. So it's not like, you know, my number is really dropped off when I stopped drinking and it's not like I'm with so many different guys. I think you're right. Like when my, when my not that you're right, I think, you know, I'm just filtering so much that I'm not sleeping around so much. But when I did sleep around more, I definitely mad up with a lot of the selfish ones that didn't even care if I got off. You know what I mean? Right. So if you want to stand out in a dating pool, care about your partner's pleasure, be a good lover and we will come right back because we want it. Right. But what is, so, but what are like the complaints that guys have for women? Like how do women become better lovers for men? Yes. This is another big thing. We sometimes grow up thinking that sex is done to us and that's something we participate in or that we're getting involved in. But sex is between everyone who's in there, right? As a two or more. And we should all be active participants. Remember, even when even consent has to be enthusiastic, you don't just lay there like a rag doll, say, at least say yes, be like, I really want you communicate. We all should obviously get better dirty talk, but we, there are a lot of pillow princesses out there and like, look, I get it. I can be very lacy sometimes, but there's so much more we can do. And at the very least, we can stroke their ego a little bit. I know sometimes we don't want to and we think their ego's too big, but we can fucking compliment. We can be like, that feels amazing. You're so hot. Thank you for fucking me like this. As dirty as a nasty as you want to talk to them. They love it. And if you don't want to move, if you don't want to actually do cardio, just stimulate their brains. They'll be happy with that. But you could learn obviously how to ride dick better, how to give hand jobs, how to give blow jobs and few techniques, few tips. But truly when you have the attitude and the enthusiasm of being an active participant and wanting to be there and really wanting them, what men really crave is to be wanted and desired. And if you have that, you should be fine. Yeah. And that's where hand jobs and blow jobs come in, right? Like if I'm not in the mood, I'm like, but I'll blow you or I'll give you, you know, whatever. Like it's not and you and why not? Why not do that? Just because you're not interested. Just like if the guy, you know, if the guy doesn't want to do anything, but he'll like go down on a girl, like why not just give your partner something if you're not interested or you have your period and you don't want to fuck, you know what I mean? Why not give a hand job or a blow job? A hundred percent. That's why the scale that I like, that's where that comes in. Like, hey, no, I don't want to fuck. I'm bloated. I'm on my period. I'm tired, but I will give you a hand job. Absolutely. Come here. Just because I don't want to do too much. Just come where I'm comfortable and I'll fucking jerk you off. That's completely fine. Yeah. And it's not that hard, right? What are your techniques? Could you give any? Absolutely. Okay. It's hard because you can't see me. So I'm going to do my best to explain. Yeah. Excuse. Excuse my English. Um, okay. Let's do, let's do my two favorites. And if you want more, we can do more. Yeah, sure. You could do it. You could do your two favorites. That's perfect. Yes. Uh, first one is you can do one hand holding the base. I really like to hold the base and the strength or the pressure that you use depends on your partner. I like to go as hard as they can take it because it keeps the blood in the penis and it feels good for them. It's like a, a DIY Cochrane, you know? So for the pepper grinder, you can use one hand at the base or you can use both hands and you're basically moving them up and down while you're twisting your hands in opposite directions. That's the move. It's like you're grinding pepper. Yeah, that's the move. My friend who used to tell me the hand, and he'd show me the move and it was the back and forth of the hands in the opposite direction. Like exactly what you're saying. He was like, that's what, that's what makes it killer. Yeah. And you can do it as slowly and gently or you can fucking go to down and depends on them against the people's penises are so sensitive and different degrees, you have no idea. And the second technique is called the lemon squeezer. So now we are holding the base with one hand or fingers and we're squeezing that shed as much as they can take. And then either just with your fingertips, not with the palm of your hand, if they're very sensitive, you're basically going up and down in little circles. Like you're twisting your wrist a little bit, go up and down with your fingertips, or if they can take more, you take the palm of your hand and you do circles around the tip of the penis or you involve your hand just on the tip and it's like you're squeezing a lemon, right? You're trying to get every little drop out. And that can make people basically have seizures because it is too much and they fucking love it. Some people cannot take it. So just do the fingertips. But if you switch it up between the two of them, they're bound to come and they can do that to themselves. Let me ask you this. How did you learn these techniques and all this kind of stuff? Honestly, I, well, I love giving hand jobs. This was all in the field, Kathy, and talking to other sex educators as well. Like we always talk each other up and share our techniques. Right. So you learned from another educator is what you're saying. Or by personal experience from giving so many hand jobs. But how did you know that a hand job was like a good thing? Cause like to me, like I said, until my friend really explained it and he became one of my booty call guys way down the line. And then I started giving him hand jobs and I really then realized, you know, why a hand job should not be discounted. You know, how did you even know that it was like a thing? Cause like you said, a lot of people will be like, oh, I can give myself a hand job. Who cares? You know, I never stopped giving them. I love them. And also because I, I cannot deep throat for the life of me. My mouth is too small. So I would always involve a hand. And when I'm too tired, I'm, I just use my hands, you know, it was like a little helper, my hands, cause my mouth is just, doesn't do the trick. I am not that good at giving blow jobs. I can, I can do it, but I'm not the best. I'm not a throat code. I'm not anything. My hands are where the magic are. Yeah, but you use your hands when you're blowing the guy. It's mostly hands. You don't have to deep throat a guy. That's what I know for sure. You don't need to deep throat. Correct. I, I've never needed to, and they can come if they want to, you know, so. No, but you could use your mouth with your hands. The hand is like what makes, that takes, makes a blow job great. Yeah. I'm saying you never had to swallow a penis. Like that's never been necessary to put it all in my mouth. No, I want to learn to me. It's like squirting and deep throating. These are like party tricks that I would be like so proud to like be able to pull out of my back pocket. I always make jokes about it, but I've never learned and I've always given good head and my guy friends have told me like it's fun for, you know, but it's not like the end all be all like a good blow job does. It's not like, oh, it makes it better than another blow job. You know what I mean? But it is like a fun thing to do, but you don't have to for sure. For guys, that's it. Yeah. So listen, why don't you give a shout out to where people can get more information, learn some techniques, maybe hire you, listen to your podcast, give out all of your information. I'll put a link in the, and I'll put like your links and stuff in the description. Perfect. Thank you so much for having me. This is a blast. I could talk to you for another hour. I'm more obsessed with your whole life story, but anyway, go on. Part two. Um, guys, you can find me at sex with Alexa on Instagram or the podcast is add in bed with Alexa pod or listen to in bed with Alexa and wherever you stream the podcast. I do video too. So you can watch me talk to my guests and explain all the techniques on video. And if you want to work with me, you can email me at Alexa at sex with Alexa.co. Okay, great. And so, and on the podcast, it's you talking to like all kinds of different people that are just like so much to talk about sex, right? It's all about sex, but all different kinds of things like experts, real people, everything, right? Yes, literally doctors, sex workers, real people, sex educators, therapists, everything in between. It is a blast. Yeah. So you love what you do? They don't have to get in bed with me. Oh, is that what it is? Do you remember that? Yeah, I record from bed and I've had, you know, six year old doctors getting in bed with me and it's hilarious. Oh my God, that's a smart thing to do. They literally, and you said you tape in New York, right? Or you just tape all over. Like how do you get all your people to get bed with you? Yes, all over whenever I also give workshops on Swinger Cruises. That's where I teach handjobs, pussy worship, anal, like all that jazz. I do it hands on, on the Swinger Cruises. So I record there. I record in New York, in London, big cities. I just take all my equipment with me. I do it all and I just need a bed, which is incredible because I don't need to rent the fucking studio. Yeah, I love it. I can't believe you just told me now that you like do this on Swinger Cruises. We need to have you back on. I love having people back on. You're super fun to talk to. I can't come lay in bed with you because I am anonymous on my show. We'll figure it out. Let's figure it out, but you're fun. Thank you so much for calling in. Send me a cute pic from my Patreon. I have a Patreon where I post pics over there. Absolutely. Okay. And I will let you know when this airs. It'll be on my sexual health Saturdays. Like when I, you know, so either this probably this Saturday or next Saturday for sure or a Sunday. Incredible. Okay. Perfect. So keep me, I'll email you when it goes up. Okay. Amazing. Thank you so much, Kathy. Thanks Alexa. Bye. Bye. At Aldi, we think low prices are for everyone. And boy, do we mean everyone. You, your Nan, your Cockapoo, your ex-situationship, Barbara from next door, traffic wardens, Piers Morgan, even that annoying guy James from finance. Yep. Low prices should be enjoyed by all, not just those with a membership. What's it? So Aldi, don't do one. No points, no cards, no fat. Aldi, which cheapest supermarket, even without a loyalty thingy. Okay. I just want to tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers is now available, not only in paperback and ebook, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out till August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story. There's a Cuck Queen story. There's a Cuck story. There's a gang being girl story. Like I said, 17 stories and they're all told in the third person and they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person and I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them, they're really short chapters, easy read. You could read, you know, one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format. And finally, the audio book is available coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint. Okay. There's no way you'd get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me. Okay. I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other and that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you could win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private. Like I said, all you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audio book, the ebook or the paperback, send it to me at strictlyanonymouspodcast.com. That's strictlyanonymouspodcasts at gmail.com and I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. This is the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Strictly Anonymous Podcast.