How I Learned to Lean on God After Sudden Loss | Sadie Robertson Huff | Alena Franklin

What's up everybody? Welcome back to the world that's good. Podcast Happy Wednesday. I hope you're having a great week, but friends, it is about to get so much better. We have an incredible guest on the podcast today. I actually got to meet her a long time ago when she was much younger and now seeing the woman that she's become and just the things that she's doing is so incredible. She has a new book out called God is as a devotional book. We have Alina Franklin on the podcast today, which is so cool to call you by your new last name. I know it's very fun. It's crazy. How old were you when I met you? Do you remember that in the factory? Oh gosh, I was like in adolescence. I was crazy. Maybe like 15, maybe 14 or 15. That is wild. It's so cool for both of us. I was such a baby too when we met. Yeah. But like, man, your heart has always just been so pure in the way that you have used your life and your voice has been so beautiful. I remember I met you with your dad and even the way that he just like the way he loved you and protected you during that season was just beautiful. So I'm glad I got to meet you then and I'm glad I get to know you now. I'm glad you get to know me now too because that was an angsty hard season of life. And I'm like, say he met the worst version of that was the worst version. Oh my gosh, if that's the worst, then you are incredible. But I know that was a hard time and we're going to talk about all that as we get into this podcast. I am so truly thankful that you came here and I can't wait to have a conversation because you're someone I follow on Instagram and I just am like, I love her. She's so cool. She's so cute. You and Kaz, your husband are just the sweetest. And now I'm like, yes, now we actually get to like be in the same room. It's so awesome. This is my also shout out shameless plug for everyone to go follow her on Instagram. You will not regret it. She's the influencer worth following. But tell me about life being married now. Tell me about you and Kaz for everyone who doesn't know him. How'd you all meet the whole thing? We want to hear about the relationship. Okay, marriage has been amazing. We just hit one year and it was the best year of my life, which I think a lot of people have prepared us for marriage to be really hard. And I know that there will be seasons of that. Thankfully, our first year was the easiest, most peaceful, most fun. We went to probably, I think it's like seven or eight different countries, three or four different continents, like just travel the whole year. What continents did you go to? We did Africa, we did Europe, we did Australia. Wow. And yeah, it was amazing. And the way that we met, we were like childhood friends, not really our families were friends. And so we were like, you know, cousins, but not totally like, you know what I'm saying? You've got those people that your families are around, but you don't really ever talk to him. I never talked to him because he was older, like by three years. And so at the time it's very weird. But he was friends with my cousins. And so I knew of him knew about him. Always thought he was cute. Always, always, always. And then I moved to Nashville. He moved a couple years later. And during COVID we became really good friends for like a year. And I'm really thankful for that year of just like platonic friendship. I think it's helped us a lot in dating and then marriage. And then during a snowstorm in Nashville, I just was like, I can't take this anymore. Like we're obviously secretly in love and we need to like talk about this. And so I just confronted him and I was like, can you talk about it? And so then I let him lead and you know, the rest is history. See, I love this so much because you know, girls are always like, is it okay if I make the first move, how to be pursued? And I actually think that there is something to giving a man like the confidence to pursue you, you know, like he pursued you. I'm sure he led in the most beautiful ways from y'all whenever y'all were in a relationship. But there's something to as a woman saying like, Hey, I'm interested. Yeah, they need that permission. Yeah, you need that permission and even that confidence to pursue. So I love that you were like, okay, let's talk about it. And thank God for a snowstorm. Well, thank God, thank God for a snowstorm and like wise counsel because I'm a bit I'm even more confrontational than that. So I wanted to just like lead the whole thing and women kind of like walked me through how to, you know, like give him permission to lead and then let him lead. So thankfully I had people around me that helped me do that. Well, that's so cool. I love that. Um, Kaz, I've actually known for a long time, Kazia. I love his name. Do you call him Kaz? I call him Kazia and Xi. I mean, that's a cool name. He should go back because I always is at such an epic name. But actually when Ella worship was first starting, he was doing the drums for us. Yeah, so talented, crazy talented musician. And I always look back at that and think that's so special that we got to know him during that season. Such an incredible man of God. And when I saw you two get together, I was like, this is how our house come over the kingdom. I think everybody said that and probably thought that when it was like, Oh my gosh, this is incredible. And it's one of those things whenever like someone like you and him are dating, we're like, please don't break up. And then when you get married, they're like, Yes, it's such a win. It was awesome. Yeah. Well, like you mentioned, you have so much wise counsel around you. You really are surrounded by some of the most influential people in everybody's life, you know, who gets to watch from their platforms, but you are up close to all those people, your family with those people. I'm interested to hear from you what the best piece of advice you've ever been given it, which is our question, the What's Good podcast, but I'm sure you've gotten so much good advice over the years, it might be hard to narrow that one down. Yeah. Any time I think of the best advice I've gotten, I think of like one of the hardest moments of my life and one of the wisest people in my life and that colliding and like, I really think changing changing the trajectory of my life in ways that I probably won't realize until heaven, but I was in the hospital, my mom died in 2018, super sudden, like within an hour she was there and then she wasn't. And I didn't even make it to the hospital before she was gone. And so I'm, you know, we're all on our knees devastated. And my aunt comes up to me and as I just like ball into her arms sob uncontrollably, she just whispers in my ear, don't be their mom, be their sister. And I have three sisters and I'm the oldest and naturally I'm a caretaker and like, I just go in and I love people really hard that I care about. But her advice to me, I think like really changed and shaped my friendship with my sisters to where now we've just got this tight knit bond that I think if I had stepped into the motherly role and tried to like solve all their issues and be strong for them, I don't think we would have as genuine as a friendship as we all do. And so that's probably it's definitely the greatest piece of advice I've been getting. Wow. That is like so cool that in that moment someone came up and said that because I feel like in that moment you never know what to say, you know, in those moments and the fact that someone had such a word. I mean, that's truly from the Lord. It's really cool to hear you say that because in a completely different context, the Lord gave me a similar word in a completely different time of my life whenever I was like, Oh, what is my purpose and what do you have for me? And how do I go about using fame for your glory and all this kind of stuff? I felt like the Lord told me, I'm not calling you to be famous. So I'm calling you to be a sister and a friend of those who don't have one. That's why my podcast on Mondays is called sisters and friends. That's why LL Converse called LL sister. We have sister all over these walls. And why I always kind of keep that at the forefront of my mind is because a sister is something that like I know I can be. It's something that doesn't take, you know, you don't have to be the character. You just get to be a sister. You get to be a friend. You get to be who God called you to be in its fullness without the pressure of anything else. You can laugh, you can cry, you can dance, you can sing without wondering what is that person thinking about it because they're your sister, you know? And there's just so much freedom in it. And so the fact that the word sister brought like you freedom to just be and not to have to pull it all together, even lead your younger siblings, which I'm sure you did by nature and naturally, but like took that off is just really, really cool. It's very beautiful. I want to talk about that time because I guess it probably wasn't long after that that I did meet you. So that probably, you know, like probably a year, maybe a little less. Yeah. Wow. So you were going into high school when that, when that happened. Wow. And I think one thing that kind of always stood out to me that was interesting is like you had to navigate that very publicly. I know your life was public before you were in war room and acting and those kind of things. But what was that like for you being so young and having such a public platform with the hardest thing that has happened? Yeah. Far from easy. I think death is hard. And then navigating death in the public eye is hard because it's just like, it's going to be the worst version of you. Like you're going through some of the hardest things you'll ever go through suffering is naturally, it's, you know, it purifies us, but also it's ugly. Like the process is very ugly. And so I just kind of, I think I grew very and also being a teenager is already super angsty. And so that's the, the best word I can think of is angsty. Like this once pure and like just really, I think gentle and joyful girl had like just been stripped of like the things that made her who she is. And so I just grew kind of bitter and angry, especially towards the church growing up in like ministry and those people mean really well. And also I think as the church, we're not totally sure how to walk with people through suffering and so, and we're human. And so people make mistakes and do the wrong things inside. Just, I think I lost sight of grace in that season. And also I think God was taking me on a much deeper like, you know, journey inside that I think I'm close to the other side of now. But in the think of it, I'm like, I remember very little just that like God was with me through the whole thing. And that the people I lived in Franklin at the time, the people of Franklin are incredible and the most loving and kind and generous humans ever. And looking back, I can see that in the moment I was like, I am being smothered by nice Southern people. I just moved from Dallas. It was all very different. And looking back, I'm really, really thankful for those people. They, I think they made that whole transition and just grief a lot easier in ways that I don't recognize till now. I remember whenever we started low and I had all the what ifs, what if I fail, what if it isn't where I need to be. And looking back, I can see so clearly that God had his hand in the whole thing, starting something new is exciting, but it's also very scary. And that's why I'm thankful for Shopify. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e-commerce in the US from massive brands to tiny startups. Team Low starts on Shopify every single day for managing inventory and staying on top of orders. It just works. You can build a beautiful online store with templates that actually match your vibe and their AI tools are game changers. They help write product descriptions, page headlines, even enhance product photos, plus everything's in one place. So inventory, payments, analytics, and they have a 24 seven customer support. It really feels like you have a built in business partner. I think it's so amazing for anyone starting out a business. 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It was a Lauren Daigle song. I believe church of the city. I used to sing that song rescue. It could have been it was in the city. I remember seeing you. Yeah, seeing rescue. Okay. Okay. Like that is an incredibly brave bold thing to do. I don't know if you naturally sing if you'd always sung if that wasn't so bold and crazy, but like, okay, you it's one thing to be put in the public eye and you can't help it, but it's another thing to like put yourself in the front. You know, like you're like, I'm willing to sing this song knowing people know my story people. So like what was God teaching you during that time of prompting you to do those very public things? Did you want to? Was it a wrestle? I'm just so interested in that. Yeah, I think it was a wrestle. I think parts of me have wrestled with the fact that it didn't feel all the way optional. Like being who I am, I felt pressure to like help other people in the midst of my needing help. And at the same time, what I realized now is that I was simply walking in the authority of suffering, which is like to invite other people into this thing that they're also experiencing and into like, you know, relationship with God. And so both can exist. I feel exposed and exploited and don't want to be up here. And at the same time, I'm watching God do much more than I could imagine with this part of my story that I would rather not have. Wow. Walking in the authority of suffering. Can we just take a minute? Listen, I just heard a sermon on that from Ephesians. Walk that out for a second. I've never even heard of that. Yeah, she said it and I was like, everything came together. Like the book, everything that I've done has been because I've been able to, God has given me the gift of walking in the authority of suffering, which just means that like, I've felt the things and I've done the things and now I get to talk about Jesus in a way that like has real, you know, like, yeah, exactly. Wow, that is good. Okay. Because there's so many people listening to this who might know you, might not know you, but maybe because they heard of your story, they want to listen to this podcast, maybe they're dealing with suffering, maybe they've experienced a loss. I think that that is going to give so much hope to people to know that like you don't, suffering doesn't just have to be something and this is interesting. I'm navigating the wording of this because I literally talked to a mentor about this yesterday of like, you don't just have to keep taking hits from the enemy and being the person who suffers. Like at some point, something's got to switch and you take the authority over it. And I think a lot of times, like when we say spiritual warfare is happening, it's like, for me, I tend to just like let myself get beat up. And it's like, no, you have authority. Like you fight back, you've been given spiritual weapons, you've, you know, you've walked with the Lord enough to stand on it. And so I think it's so encouraging to hear you say like, yeah, that was an ain't see girl, that girl was struggling as you should have been. You just lost your mom. Yes, you were ain't see. Yes, you were struggling. Yes, all those things. Yes, it felt like the worst version of yourself, but you're like, but now I'm this girl and I walk in the authority of suffering doesn't mean it's still not hard. Doesn't mean there's still not hard things that come with that doesn't mean I even want this platform or ask for this platform. But this is what the Lord has walked with me through. And this is how I can speak into it now. I just feel like that is like so much hope for people out there who are in the grip of it and thinking, am I ever going to find a boldness again? I'm ever going to find that joy again, that laughter, how you talked about, you know, you were kind of this pure joyful girl. And then you went through something really hard, but you're finding that again. And that's so cool to like allow people to see. I mean, I think about following your journey, just on social media, like when I look at your social media page, I see genuine joy, like love and this friendship that you have with your husband and adventure. And it's like, that's so cool to know that that's possible on the other side of suffering and through the suffering. It's beautiful. So inspired by you. You mentioned that the church doesn't always know how to walk through suffering. Well, and I agree with you. I totally agree. They think people don't know how to do it. Looking back at that, what do you wish, how do you wish people helped? You know what I mean? Like, because there are people out there who might have friends who are walking through suffering, like, what's the best way, I guess, if you will. And I know these are messy conversations. There's not like a right way always. But what did you see in that time? You go, that was so helpful. Like, I remember that person loving on me in this way. Yeah, I want to tread very carefully because I feel very passionately about God's people and that like, they genuinely mean the best. And so, like, I'm so thankful for the people of God who surrounded me and did what they knew how to do with what they had. I think what I've learned, even as I walk with my sisters through suffering and walk through friends now in like, the thick of suffering is that presence is the most powerful part of all of it, like presence and prayer. Your prayers will go way farther than any word that you have for the person who's like, trauma-stricken and won't remember anything you said anyways. And then presence, I think, is what they'll remember that you were just there. You were one call away, you were sitting next to them when they got the call. You know, like, I think those things are really important and it actually has less to do with what we say. It's just that like, presence of prayer, knowing that, them knowing that you're praying for them and that you're genuinely there and you're not afraid to walk in the mud with them. I think those are really powerful. The two peas. The two peas. I love two peas in a pod. I love it. That's really good advice, friend. You know, I was listening to several of your interviews just preparing for you to come on the podcast and I loved one of the things that I heard you say about what marriage has taught you and you were talking about, do you remember? I'm like, what did I say? I know, I'm like, I know too much about you. But no, one of my favorite things is getting to prep for podcasts of guests like you who come on because I get so blessed and strengthened by studying your life. And this morning, getting to watch interviews you've done, I'm like, man, I haven't filled up this girl. You just wisdom flows out of you. It's an overflow of your heart, you know, from the heart. So the mouth shall speak and you can tell your heart is, has been with the Lord. But you said what it has taught you and what has been a beautiful thing in marriage is that it's taught you like how to be comforted, like it's taught you how to be comforted and you said it in a much more beautiful way. But kind of that idea that you were talking about of how you naturally want to do that for others and you take on that like nurture, a comforter, but like now you're in a season where like you get to be comforted and nurture. Speak into that a little bit and like the, I don't know, like how powerful that's been for you to walk through a marriage and it was that like a hard thing for you because it was new. Yeah, I've been married a year. So I actually have no idea what I'm talking about. The same mentor that or it's Crystal, you know, Crystal Evans, Crystal Evans, her Crystal sister. She's the one who told me to be my, you know, sister, sister, not their mom. And then also she told me, men need you to need them. And I heard it and I was just like, that's so like, it sounds, I don't know, kind of demeaning, like, why do they need to be needed? And also, I'm confused. I'm like from a girl power household. So I've just always done things on my own. And then I, I've, as I got married and like started living with a man, I realized, oh, when I don't allow him to love me and nurture me in the ways that he sees fit, I'm stripping him of his masculinity and ability to like be my husband. And I think that's probably universal, like for friendships, like we're stripping our friends of the ability to be our like a true friend when we don't allow them to help us. And so I think it's more universal, but specifically in marriage, allowing him to nurture me has been healing for me. Like I always talk about being passenger princess and all these things that I get to experience now that I'm married, like as an oldest child, I never got to like, you know, just be, yeah, be the baby. So now I get to be the baby sometimes and it's so freeing and healing for me has made me softer. Absolutely. And taught me how to be a better nurturer and lover of people. That's so cool. I love that so much. I was thinking about that last night because I have a little bitty baby and she's two months old and totally dependent on me for everything, which is like the sweetest thing ever. And you get to experience just so much of God's creation. Like you never have, you know, whenever you're nurturing a child. And so yesterday she was having a rough day. She has, you know, reflex and the whole thing and she was crying a lot. So I held her like all day. And I wasn't planning on her bringing her to spaces that I did bring her to because I'm just not about to work, but I was like, forget it. I'm bringing her like she needs her mama. And I'm also still nursing her. So it was like the whole thing. So anyway, it's a held her all day long. Like by the time I laid her in bed, like my arms were sore, then I went and got in bed and I laid in my husband's arms. And I was like, oh, this is so cool. Like I've held someone all day, my baby. And now like he's holding me. And like, ultimately that teaches you that like God, God carries him and us and all of us in those moments. And it's just been so beautiful as I've been like reading scripture. And you know, you read scripture differently, like when you're going through certain seasons and some verses that would have never stuck out to you in the past are now sticking out to you. And there's a verse that David talks about how he at his mother's breast, he learned to trust the Lord. And it's talking about how like whenever he was an infant and he, you know, it was dependent on his mother for food. But every time like he needed it, he had it. And that's how he like learned to trust the Lord. So you start to see these things about God that like you didn't realize until now you're in this situation and you're like, wow, like she's learning trust right now and me. And hopefully later in life, she'll know to trust the Lord that when she needs something, it will be provided from him. It's amazing. And I think in like, it's so cool to see, you know, you writing a book in the character of God based off the things you've walked through in life and learning like what the true characteristics are of him versus what you thought they were of him. So I'm so excited to get into the idea of this book and what God taught you. So you want to start a business, you might think you need a team of people and fancy text skills, but you don't. You just need GoDaddy Arrow. I'm Walton Goggins and as an actor, I'm an expert in looking like I know what I'm doing. GoDaddy Arrow uses AI to create everything you need to grow a business. It'll make you a unique logo, it'll create a custom website, it'll write social posts for you and even set you up with a social media calendar. Get started at godaddy.com slash arrow. That's godaddy.com slash a i r o. They're growing up won't be long before the thought of a family holiday is just but with Hilton's staycations all over the UK, we don't need to go far to feel close. Welcome. And with connecting rooms confirmed when we book, we'll have plenty of space to make the most of every moment. Everyone in the photo. When time away means time together, it matters where you stay. Book now at hilton.com. Hilton for this day. First of all, why did you want to write a devotional book? Because that's a big thing to take on. I know you have a lot of authors around you, but did you feel ready for it? Were you excited for it? Nervous? It was one of the first things I've ever felt like totally not equipped and like capable of, which like naturally makes me want to just lean in and do it. And also is like a reminder to me, oh, this must be like something God wants me to do. Like sometimes, yeah, we're totally out of our depths and we should have no business doing something. And other times there's like a warfare part of that where it's like the enemy doesn't want you to know that like you have authority over this and can talk about this and write about it. And so honestly, it happened how most things happen in my life. Like an opportunity comes up and I just say yes. And so I got the opportunity and I said yes. And then I was like, what the heck am I doing talking about the character of God? I haven't gotten a seminary. I haven't done any of the things that I feel like I would need to do to talk about this. And yet I did it. And so I think that's what makes it something that's so accessible and trustworthy. Yeah, coming from like a true authentic place. It's like, not that it's not if you go to seminary, gosh, we need all of that. But it's also refreshing to be like, Hey, I'm a girl too. And I go through life and life is hard. And I want to understand who God really is because because if you don't know who God is, it makes life very, very complicated. You don't know who you are. You don't know which purposes, you know, anything is. And so I think it's amazing that you where you're at with what you have and the knowledge you have going, you know, have enough to talk about who God is in the best way that I understand him to be. Did you like, even with the intimidation of talking about the character God, how did you and begin the process of that? Is it something that as you were writing, you were like coming to a re like looking back at the last, you know, seven years since what you went through and go, Okay, this is what I learned in that time. I was actually like thinking of all the questions and like pain points that I had in the midst of suffering. I wanted to talk directly to the human experience, which I think is filled with hard stuff. And that's when we tend to like search for answers and ask questions. And so I just looked back at when I was 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, what were the questions that I had about about life. And then most of those questions actually pointed to a direct like flaw in the way that I viewed God. So when I thought about, am I beautiful or am I smart or like all these me questions that actually just stems from not knowing my creator and how he made me. And so then I quickly realized, Oh, I don't want to write a book on identity. I want to write a book on like who God is. And then all the answers to like, Because that actually is a book on identity. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I think it's the missing piece in the identity conversation that I think just changes the game. Yeah, I agree. One of my favorite scriptures is whenever, you know, they're asking Jesus, or when Jesus is saying like, who do people say that I am? You know, and then there's a, well, some say you're this and then he says, who do you say that I am? And then when Peter tells Jesus, like you are the Messiah, you are the Christ. And then immediately after Jesus looks at Peter and says, and you are Peter, and on this rock, I'll go to my church. And it's like the minute Peter realizes who Jesus is and confesses that he then in return gets told who he is. And you see that even with like, Moses, I think about when Moses standing by the bush and God speaking to him and Moses is like, who am I that I could go do this? And God's like, I am who I am, you know, like the answer to your question of who you are is actually who I am. When you realize who I am, you're going to know who you are. And so I love that in that process of going, Okay, I need to ask this question about me. How do I know I'm beautiful? How do I know this? It's like, actually, no, if I start talking about who God is, all of this is going to be resolved. All this is going to be figured out. And you're right. Especially in those teenage years, I think we spend so much time trying to like figure out how to be confident, how to answer these questions about me. But truly, if you start studying the characteristics of God, your creator, it all starts making sense. It like, all those things that you thought, I'll never be able to believe I'm beautiful. You actually do because you feel treasured and loved becomes so much smaller. Yeah. If I'm looking up all of a sudden, this body that I just get to steward for, you know, hopefully 80 plus years, like, that's not a big deal. Yeah, not even a huge important thing. When you when you look at who God actually is. So I was also just like, it was so anxiety easing or just like peaceful realizing that it actually wasn't even about me. Like this whole thing had nothing to do. I just get to be a vessel and you know, I love that I can relate so much. I remember as a teenager, just feeling really insecure about who I am, body, all of that kind of stuff. And I'm so thankful that my relationship with the Lord changed that. Like I can actually say I'm confident in who I am. And because it doesn't really matter that much. It's like just of the lease of importance of, you know, what I look like compared to what God's called me to do. But it was really cool because the other day I was talking to my sister-in-law. We were at the beach and I was like eight weeks postpartum, you know, from a C-section. So like, you know, you're not looking your best, okay? And it was funny. She's like, how are you feeling, you know, with everything? And I said, I wish every girl could experience like what I've been experiencing lately and how confident I feel in my body and how proud I feel and how much like how thankful I am. It's like I have so much gratitude for what my body just did because it got to carry this baby that I love with everything in me. And it's nurturing her and nourishing her. And like, I could just go on and on. And I'm so thankful. And I just feel like that perspective of gratitude has changed so much of how I've seen myself and appreciate myself the way I speak to myself. Because I'm like, I will not let myself talk down on like the creation that like that God created. And that's not to say there aren't hard moments and there's not moments where I'm like, I wish this or that. But truly and genuinely, I was like, I wish every girl could feel this way that I feel right now. And I would have never thought like my 18 year old self, if she was like looking at my 20 year old self and just looking at the body after a C-section, like, I don't know that she would have had that relationship enough with the Lord to say the words that I'm saying. You know, it would have been so much more superficial, so much more surface level, visual base. But like, I'm so thankful. I'm not in that state anymore. And that 100% comes from knowing who God is and being grateful for who he is. Talk to me about some of those things that, you know, obviously we can talk about insecurities and looks, but maybe there were some of those things that were bigger questions that you might have had wrong about who God is. We're talking about suffering. Were there things that you thought about God that as you begin to study Him, you just realized you were wrong in? Yeah. I think I was afraid of God. I still am sometimes. And it's not like that healthy fear, like I respect Him. It's like, no, I'm actually like afraid of you. And like, just have this feeling that you're going to punish me, that you hate me, that you're not going to protect me if I don't do all the things correct. And I think a part of that stem from, yeah, life, all of a sudden being turned completely upside down and going, I thought this God was supposed to be here to protect me and, you know, like, watch over me and care for me and all the things. And so I think that was my, one of my greatest questions was, is God safe? Like, is God going to protect me? Is he trustworthy? And I quickly, well, not quickly, it took me a while, but he quickly came to my rescue and showed me that he was trustworthy and safe. And a part of that was just that as I rejected him, he continued to pursue me just like relentlessly and with love, like with love and mercy, love and mercy, love and mercy over and over. And so I got to just experience his trustworthiness, even in like walking through marriage every season of my life, he showed up and he showed up just on time and just the right way with just the right pace, like proving himself trustworthy. And so I don't know, I love that, I love that we can, and I don't think many of us know this, that we can like go to God with our questions and our concerns and some of our sins, like God, I don't like you. Like we can go to him with that and it doesn't scare him, it doesn't frighten him. I think he's just like gets excited at the thought that we're going to be honest with him and he was, we're going to let him like, you know, come over us and show us who he actually is. And he actually does, like it's so cool. I can think about times where I've been like praying and frustrated at God, like, why would you let this happen? I thought you were supposed to be this, you know, that kind of thing. And this actually happened recently, so it's really cool. And so there's been times in my life where I've done that. And then it's so cool because when he like redeems those moments, or you see his faith, when you see that he was walking through you, it's like yesterday, someone said something to me when they were praying over me. And it was like, he's done the Lord says this, and it was the exact thing I accused God of not doing and not being. And she's like, and this is what he's saying over you. And after she got him praying, I was like, that was so powerful. Thank you for saying that because it just made me feel in this moment that God heard me when I said it to him. And it was like his response back, you know? And like, you don't always get those moments. Sometimes you just get those in reading scripture and you go, okay, that's who you are. You know, that's how I felt, but this is who you are. And I'm believing this is who you are, you're faithful. And even if I don't see the full redemption on this side of heaven. But then in some moments, you do get that. And you're like, Oh God, like you heard me. And like you heard that wrestle, and you actually like responded to it with truth. And I was like, that was really, really cool. So I think like not, you know, not everybody's going to write a book on who God is. You can go read the book and dive in this way and go through a devotional about it. But it's worth taking the time to process those things out. What do I think about God that actually just might not be true? Like weed out those lies so that he can become that safe place in that trustworthy place. Because I do think a lot of people are like frustrated. They're like, promises of God are not happening in my life. And they're supposed to be promises. I'm like, but maybe, maybe they're actually not promised. Maybe you think that they are because you heard that, but that's actually not what the Bible says about who God is, you know? So you started studying and you're like, Oh, okay, I heard that different. That's actually not what your word says. It's a huge part of why I wanted to write God is as a devotional. It was because I wanted to like, one, you don't have to go to seminary to understand the basics of who God is that we so often get confused about. And like, he's very approachable, very understandable, although he's a mystery. He's also like, like we can come, he's a friend, we can understand him. And so I was, as I was writing it, I was like, what's really important. And I didn't realize this until after the book, but I was big on the knowledge part. Like his scripture tells us who he is all over. And so the book is scripture filled. And then what I realized later is, yes, it's scripture filled, but also because I wrote it, it's experience filled. And so it's filled with stories of my own personal life and like the experiences I've had with God and knowledge and experience, I think are those both aid in our faith. And there's like this perfect combination of them, like it's one thing to read Ephesians, it's another thing to live it out and then to get to read about it and hopefully be encouraged and inspired by somebody's personal experience, you know, of Ephesians through here or whatever. That's why I wrote it. Cause I was like, I want people to be interested in what God has to say in his word that is alive and because it's alive, I've experienced parts of it. Wow, that's good. I love that. One thing that I think is really cool, cause y'all have the magazine remind me the name of it. For girls like you. For girls like you. And your mom started that, right? Really for you. Yes. Tell me about that. I was an avid reader and like kindergarten. So you could like, you know, readers were A to Z when they used to like grade us that way. And I was at a Z. So I was just picking up adult books and reading them in kindergarten, which can get you in trouble. So I'd bring something home and my mom would be like, what is that? Like, why are you reading that? And so she quickly was just like, okay, we need to figure out how to like give this girl something to read. That's not cat in the hat. And also like it needs to be, you know, fueling for her faith. And I, she just saw something in me really early on cause she's my mom. And I think she probably had whispers from God about what he would want me to do. And so she just started writing this like magazine that was just for me. So she would just write, you know, sophisticated things that I could read and enjoy. Oh my gosh. That's so cool. Yeah. And then I started, I think handing it out to my friends and it became a whole thing. And then she pretty quickly felt like called to just make it a big thing. And so now it's called for girls like you, F-O-R girls like you. Also, she had four girls, F-O-U-R. But um, yeah, when she died, it like blew up and it's the biggest it's ever been. And so it's also really cool to see that legacy of like, you have no idea the seeds that you're planting and like what God will do with those when you're gone as well. Oh, I always say that someone actually today, this morning, I had a friend say at the house and she was like, um, say, what's your dream? Like what's something you dream about that you're not doing now that maybe it's like a 30 year old, I mean, like your 30 year old dream or your 40 year old dream? Like what's your, what are you dreaming towards? I was like, honestly, like I just want, I hope and want and I'm pursuing that I want L-O the ministry of it to be like so much bigger than me. Like I could walk away if I needed to and it just, it doesn't need me at all. It is a women's ministry that like every single person comes to and is blessed by and sees themselves in in a community that they fit in and always say it's like sisters who are studying the word together, who are in community together and I was like, and we're finally like doing that and I was like, but in the future, like I hope whenever I'm older, I'm like still seeing all these L-O local Bible studies happening around the world and L-O worship songs being sung and all this stuff because it's something that I needed when I was in high school, you know, it's something that I want to build for my girls. It's the legacy thing. So I don't just want this to be like, oh, it's a thing I'm doing now and one day it might not happen. Like no, it's the thing I'm doing now and one day I might not be as a part of it, but like I hope that the seeds that we're sowing are actually like flourishing to something beautiful and people actually have a stronger relationship with the Lord and a stronger community with friends and all that different stuff. So it's like the dream is that like what I'm doing is fruitful, you know, that it's like it has much more purpose than just these little moments or things and so your mom did that. Like she was sowing seeds and doing something that was so fruitful and like even though she's on to be with the Lord, she's still building the kingdom on earth with the same thing she put her hands to and now her legacy, her daughter's doing it. I mean, that's incredible. That's so cool. She had written in her journal, I might butcher the words, but I think if it's either a few months or two years, I can't remember, before she died, she had written in her journal like, God, I'm tired and I don't want to do, I don't necessarily want to continue to be the face of for girls like you, but I don't know what to do with it. Like I just give it to you and you do whatever. And then it's weird, like God is a mystery because then she dies and it blows up and literally does its own thing without her needing to be there. And so I don't know, it makes me think about like the state of our world at the moment and like culturally, I think we all want to be the face of things and it's actually so much more fulfilling to just do what God has asked us to do and hand it and hand the baton to the next person. Like there's something really fulfilling about that. Yes. That's what Christine Cain's like, if you build the platform, then you got to keep the platform in the sense of like, there's so much pressure and that's what I'm like. And I've realized that more now becoming a mom because I've had to step away and seasons to be a mom. And I'm like, but I so believe in what God put on my heart to do, that is to, you know, be a sister and a friend, but it's not just for me to, it's for girls to do that for sisterhood. Because I think about whenever I was 17 and I was lonely, I didn't have a lot of friends and friends were hard and I didn't know who God was and all that stuff. And I see you doing the same thing. It's looking at your younger self saying like, okay, this is what I needed. This is what I was wrestling with and doing that. I know you have a heart for probably all women, but this feels, it says for teen girls. Is that because this is what you needed during that time or this is what you were wrestling with? I still struggle. I, we all, me and the Believers were talking about the fact that it needs to say for teen girls and young women. Because I wrote it with myself in mind. So yeah, an 18 year old, 19 year old, 20 year old. But what's been really cool is since it's released, there's like, it's kind of transcended generations. And so there's older women reading it, reading it, young moms reading it with their like little girls, there's teens reading it, there's college age girls reading it. But it says teen girls, I think, because when I thought in my head about just like what version of me needed to know who God was the most, it was that. And then I realized that actually we're all still, even after teen hood tries to know who he is. Like the way publishing works is you have to go into like categories. Yes. And for me, because yeah, that would just say that because for me, I wrestled with the same thing. You remind me so much of myself and I'm like, oh, I just love learning from you and hearing what your journey's been. But most of my beginning books were all like teen books and the teen division. Then I was like, we got to get out of the teen division, even though I know I'm young. And I know these are simple things. But like everybody needs this truth. And it's hard for like someone older to say like, oh, I'm gonna buy a teen book for myself. So like, can we take out the teen because everybody needs to know who God is. And so I know it's for everybody because everybody needs that lesson and everybody needs that wisdom. And so yeah, I was just curious about that. And I love that you guys are here and like see what your mom is doing. And I love that it's bigger than it's ever been. I pray that it continues to multiply and reach young women because that is so needed. It's so cool to think about you as a little kindergartener, reading these like massive books, scandalous, I mean, that's crazy. That's crazy. Because for me, whenever I was five years old is literally we have videos of me like preaching on the countertop and doing that stuff. When you look back at your young self, are you shocked by how much of that little person you see in you now? Absolutely. I'm like, somehow I've always just been like, I don't even know how to explain it. But like, maybe it's not even a performer, but I just love talking to people and sharing about what I didn't know is that the passion would be about God. But I knew that I love talking to people and like teaching them things, something. And now that I know Jesus, I'm like, oh, this is it. I want to talk about God. That is exactly how I was because I was like in front of people felt natural in front of a camera felt, you know, and that goes from whenever I was young, like there's so many videos like my brother, you know, like you get in the door way and like climb up the door, you ever do that? And he would hold a blanket behind me and that was my stage and I would get in front of it and like talk and you just see him like awkwardly in the door, like holding the little thing. It's so funny. But it's like, I always did that. But then when I got in high school, I started getting nervous around people and secure anxiety, the whole thing. And then whenever I had like a true encounter with the Lord, it was like that young person was reignited because I was like, Oh, now that I'm passionate about the Lord, and I can talk about Jesus, like I'm not scared anymore, because I got myself out of the way, you know. And so I do think that it's beneficial for everyone to look back at who you were when you were young and like kind of naive and pure hearted and didn't know anything about what to fear. And you're like, okay, how do I get back to like what God made me to be what he originally put in me, and then use it for good. It's like, okay, I was in kindergarten reading some crazy books. But like now, like, let me tap into that. I'm going to write a book because I have, because you're kind of like an old soul in a really sweet way, all these wisdom, all this wisdom, all this knowledge and reading certainly gives you a lot of that. And now how can I put it out there to the world? Your Instagram captions are so good too, by the way. I love following on Instagram. Yes, y'all are so cute. I love following the adventures, but your captions are so good. You can tell you always keep your follower in mind. You're always trying to help other people with what you walk through. And I get what you said earlier, you're like, you didn't necessarily want to lead through your suffering. Sometimes you just wish you could just be in it. And sometimes I feel that way with like, I'm like, you know, in the past, and then like, okay, this is a lot to like be leading while I'm also learning so much. It's very humbling. But I think it's such a gift to the world that you put yourself out there in the midst of that. And it's also something that like God put on your life, you know, to get to do. And it's hard, but it's like beautiful that you've stepped in and like accepted that and not just accepted it, but like owned it and led with it. I'll just ask you this when you think about social media, because I think so many people are trying to navigate how do you social media as a young person? How do you approach social media? I don't. And that's the problem. I'm never on it. I post when I feel things. And then when I don't, I have a very like, even with promoting the book, it's been hard because I'm not always just talking on my stories and showing up every day to post. And I felt like very just like God sees me and encouraged to just like stay me, which just means you show up when you show up and when you don't. I hold hardly and I'll do the rest. But yeah, I've probably maintained, I know that social media is problematic for a lot of people and it's been a whole thing the past, I mean, honestly, for eight years, whatever, it's been a lot on there. But my feet is still like funny and, you know, just chill. And I just like looking at my friends and yeah, so I love it for that. And I also think it's really important to just maintain actual real life connection, which we're all being preached that now, you know, years after it's been created and kind of taken over. But yeah, I like to try and maintain real life and then show up with like the good stuff and I'll post about the bad stuff when I need to. But I love that. I always tell people like if you can just let social media be your overflow, that's a good place to be. I think a lot of people like go to social media to get something. It's like you're trying to get satisfaction of likes trying to get followers, trying to get attention, trying to get information. But like if that can just be a place of overflow, like, no, I'm actually going to go give to it. I'm going to go like give through my words, like hopefully I bless other people, post something fun, like be the light of the world, laugh about it, you know, go like it's just so much better when you come at it, not from a place of needing anything from it, but actually like being able to give something to it. And sometimes you don't always have something to give. So if you don't have something to give, you don't have to give, don't post, you know, and I think so many people are like the algorithm I have to post every day. It's like, okay, just trust the Lord enough to know that if you don't have something to say, don't say it yet. You know, I'm supposed to just wait. I get some people, you know, when big things happen, I've had it happen where people are like, why aren't you speaking on this? Why aren't you speaking on this? And I'm like, because I'm thinking about it, because I'm processing it, because I'm praying through it, because I'm asking the Lord for the words to say, and I don't have them yet. And so I'm not going to post today because today's the day everybody's talking about it. It's like, it might be tomorrow, it might be a week from now. And what I've done with my podcast a lot is I'm like, I might never say it on Instagram, because I cannot fit all my thoughts into a caption that only takes that many characters. These are like conversations I'm having, you know, like, I'm a talker, okay, we can't process in a little, little chat. And so yeah, I think you're so wise to just be like, Hey, I'm just going to be me. And when I have something post, I'm supposed to like, unfortunately, that's not a lot of people's approach. But I think we can certainly learn from that. Yeah. You know, your sisters, I love how you started this with your sister, I want to end it with your sisters, like, that was the word your aunt gave you, that was the word I should put on your heart. And you've been such a good sister to them, you all have the thing together. What is sisterhood? What is sisterhood taught you in general? And how would you encourage those out there to be a good sister? Oh, that's hard. I'm just thinking about like the practicality of sisterhood, which has been like, you love and you fight and you keep it moving. Like, that's my favorite part of sisterhood is that this is embarrassing and a confession I've chucked a remote at my sister's face before it was PMS I was 14 is that I think I was older. She said something crazy. And so you fight like that. And then we apologize and we move on. Sometimes you don't apologize. Like you just keep it going. Yeah. And I think that's just the human life skill, like with our sisters in Christ, with our sisters, like, we need to just be soft enough to love and like tough enough to not take it all personally and just keep moving. Like that is a word. Like just living in love. I think there's something freeing about that where you just can live and be and yeah, I want to be that kind of sister that's like a safe space for everyone. And you can throw a remote at my face and be forgiven and we can keep loving each other. Just keep it moving. I love that. I'm trying to, okay, so I'm trying to steward sisterhood right now because I have three girls and that is like truly, I guess brutal. I mean, no, they are so rough with each other and then they'll be so sweet to each other. But one thing I am teaching them is like how to come together after they fight. And so they will be so mad at each other and honey takes this from Haven and Haven takes that from Honey and they're chasing each other and they're screaming at each other and I'll go, stop. Y'all both hug right now. And it's so funny because they're like, you know, and then they do it. I'm a little one, my two-year-old. And she goes, I honor you Elsa. And I was like, that was the best thing ever. And then of course, honey ruins it. She's like, I don't want to be Elsa. And I'm like, stop. This moment is too great. That's amazing. Did you grow up doing that? Did your parents make you a hug? It's like you have to hug. You have to come together. That was our thing. Yes. It does work actually. I have seen after they hug, like it kind of resets the moment. And actually Haven really has taken on to the honor Elsa thing. And so she'll be like, I'm on your Elsa. And then for her, that's like all she needs. We're back at it. Like we're sisters. It was really kind of backfired though with our little one because Haven kept wanting to like pry her eye open while she was sleeping. I was like, Haven, stop. She's like, it's what Anna do to Elsa. And if you watch the movie, she actually does like tries to wake her up. She's taking it very literally. I was using them as an example of beautiful sisterhood. So funny. But I love that. Keep it moving. Keep it moving. Girl, you're amazing. First off, you are just radiant. You're a stunning, stunning girl who loves the Lord and it radiates off your face and your heart. And I couldn't be more thankful to know you to cheer you on in life and to everyone listening to this podcast. I know you've been so blessed by her as just an encourager and an influencer. Go follow her on Instagram. Go get this book. God is dive into who the character of God is in your life. And you're going to be amazed at how those things that you thought maybe you could never get over, you could never get past. Start to all kind of fall into place when you understand who God is and he's in the rightful place on the throne of your life. So thanks for listening friends. And thank you so much, Alina for coming on. Thank you for having me.