The Basement Yard

#539 - The Heated Rivalry Review

81 min
Jan 26, 20263 months ago
Listen to Episode
Summary

The hosts review the TV series 'Heated Rivalry,' a romance drama about two professional hockey players in a secret relationship set in 2008. They discuss the show's explicit content that led to YouTube age restrictions, analyze its storytelling approach, and explore themes of LGBTQ+ representation in sports during a time when being openly gay was culturally taboo.

Insights
  • Content moderation platforms like YouTube apply restrictive policies to LGBTQ+ content, requiring creators to self-censor or re-record episodes to avoid age restrictions
  • Pilot episodes in TV production intentionally start with high-impact dramatic moments to hook viewers and ensure they return for subsequent episodes
  • Well-executed romance narratives balance explicit content with deeper character development and emotional storytelling to maintain audience engagement
  • Historical context matters: depicting LGBTQ+ experiences in professional sports from 2008 highlights how much social attitudes have shifted in 15 years
  • Audience demand and parasocial relationships drive content creation decisions, even when creators are initially hesitant about the subject matter
Trends
LGBTQ+ representation in mainstream streaming content becoming more prominent and commercially viablePlatform content moderation creating friction between creator intent and algorithmic restrictionsAudience shipping and fan culture influencing podcast/creator content decisionsNostalgia-driven storytelling set in early 2000s appealing to millennial audiencesRomance and drama series gaining traction on streaming platforms as prestige contentBook-to-screen adaptations from niche literary communities finding mainstream audiencesCreator self-censorship strategies to navigate platform policies while maintaining content integrity
Topics
LGBTQ+ Representation in Sports MediaYouTube Content Moderation and Age RestrictionsTV Pilot Episode Structure and Audience EngagementHistorical Attitudes Toward Homosexuality in Professional SportsBook-to-Screen Adaptation StrategyRomance Genre Storytelling TechniquesPlatform Censorship and Creator Self-RegulationAudience Parasocial Relationships and Content InfluenceEarly 2000s Cultural Context and NostalgiaExplicit Content in Mainstream TelevisionCharacter Development in Romance NarrativesProfessional Sports Culture and MasculinityStreaming Service Content StrategyFan Culture and Shipping PhenomenaAccessibility of LGBTQ+ Stories in Media
Companies
YouTube
Platform age-restricted the hosts' Heated Rivalry review episode for discussing LGBTQ+ content, forcing them to re-re...
Netflix
Referenced as a streaming platform that hosts shows with aggressive opening scenes and content similar to Heated Rivalry
Prime Video
Mentioned as the platform where 'The Boys' series airs, known for starting episodes with explicit content from zero t...
People
Sidney Crosby
NHL hockey player referenced as one of the real-world inspirations for the fictional characters in Heated Rivalry
Alexander Ovechkin
NHL hockey player referenced as one of the real-world inspirations for the fictional characters in Heated Rivalry
Michael Sam
Discussed as potentially the first openly gay professional athlete, though hosts debated exact timeline of his public...
Roger Ebert
Film critic referenced when hosts compared their analytical approach to breaking down symbolism and allegory in media
Ellen DeGeneres
Mentioned as having previously held the informal title of 'president of the gays' before losing that position
Lady Gaga
Suggested as a potential current 'president of the gays' based on her consistent LGBTQ+ advocacy and cultural impact
Coleman Domingo
Actor praised for his talent and style, mentioned as a potential current 'president of the gays' in LGBTQ+ cultural d...
Timothy Chalamet
Referenced in discussion about facial symmetry and attractiveness comparisons to one of the Heated Rivalry actors
Jonathan Bailey
Suggested as newly elected 'president of the gays' due to recent prominence in LGBTQ+ cultural conversations
Quotes
"YouTube is uh, being a little bit, a little, you know, homophobic."
FrankOpening segment
"I think it's important to have queer representation in TV and film. I think that from what I have seen, it's a well done show."
FrankMid-episode review discussion
"It's got its hooks in me for sure."
JoeDuring Heated Rivalry analysis
"They didn't leave anything for the imagination."
AntContent discussion
"What a tough time to be gay in hockey. Yeah, I mean anywhere, anywhere. Let's make that abundantly clear. But professional sports definitely."
FrankHistorical context discussion
Full Transcript
Welcome back to the bas- Hello! Hello! Welcome back to the basement yard. Frank, how's it going bud? He's upset, Ant, you upset? I couldn't be more upset. We're all upset because YouTube is uh, being a little bit, a little, you know, homophobic. Say it, say it. Well, just be careful. You're pointing at me! You saw that point? Shit! Yes! No! No, no, no! And this counts in addition to So for those of you guys that don't know, if you're seeing this, you're probably a little confused. You're probably doing the old-timey cleaning of the eyes thing that they did back in the old cartoons. This is attached to an episode that we previously recorded. Yes, we're wearing different outfits. Joe is also, what you don't see, he's wearing a butt plug. Why? Because we have to revisit the conversation of heated rivalry. That's not why I'm... Wait, hold on. I'm not wearing it. Wearing it? Like you have one? We have to... No. They also technically don't know we're wearing different clothes yet. that's true we had to record the the beginning of this episode again because we put out an episode talking about heated rivalry and we watched the first and well i watched two episodes and they watched the first episode so we all were getting an idea of the show and we started reviewing it because that's what people wanted and we put it out on youtube for our patrons a week ahead uh and it just kept getting age restricted yes why because youtube was just like hold on they They were twirling their mustache. I imagine big YouTube has a twirly mustache. And they were just like, what are they talking about? We got to make sure they don't pander this to the youngest. To their defense, it was a pretty graphically discussed episode. Yeah, I mean, they were probably right. I will take full blame. I think that I didn't hold back on the review. You are the Hollander in this situation. No. The blame, if the blame is... No, he's the Russian guy. If the blame is Ilya, you are Hollander, and you got to take it. Oh, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, right. I have to take the blame, but yeah, so we're... The long shaft of the blame. Right, be careful. Be, please. But we have to re-discuss it so we can put it in this episode, but we don't want to throw out the episode completely, so we're just going to redo our review of Heated Rivalry, because last time... I got a little too hot. A little too heated. Yep, yep, yep, yep. And so we're going to just be careful about the way that we... By the way, hot in the language that we used, we didn't get like hot and bothered. Or at least I didn't over here. I think I can confirm you didn't. He seemed to get a little hot and bothered. He seemed to get a little... H and B. Yeah. H and B. He's like, and then they were doing this, and then they were doing... Yeah, and then they were... So you guys will never be able to cross-reference this because now this is Basement Yard Lost Media. Oh, so now Frank's going to just lie. Joey was sweating, and he opened his chest midway through the conversation. Opened my chest. Like his shirt. You, like, zipped your quarter zip. Down, you know. How's that catamaran he just got off of? No. No. No, all right. Well. But he was just like, he was doing this. Like an old-timey racist Southern woman. You know what I'm talking about? You know what I'm talking about? Yeah. Just like, that's what you were doing. No, no. There is no way to cross-reference what we're saying. It's fine. But we watched the first episode of Heated Rivalry, and now time has passed. I watched a lot more of it, and now I know it happens in this first season. Oh, okay. Yeah, so I have an idea. I'm not going to spoil the entire thing. Don't worry. I mean, we're definitely going to spoil the first episode and probably the second one. But we're going to spoil a little bit of that. But we also need to talk about it in a way that we are, allowing our video overlords to accept, you know, we gotta get around this so they don't unalive us. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We need to make sure that we're using the right terminology so big YouTube doesn't take the, as you were saying, the long shaft of blame and giving it to you again. Right. Careful, careful. And just you're walking on thin ice. I think if anything, first of all, skating on ice, hockey. Now we're here. Now we're here. Now we're here. Let's just go for it. Heated rivalry. I knew going in that this show was G-A-G-A-Y. And it gets really off to a good start immediately. Well, so people told us to watch the show, which we openly were just like, hold on a sec. Like, take a step back. Right. You know, like we get that the internet is like fully shipping us, but we were like, wow. Are we proud of Frank or what? And I just pointed, fuck. Oh, cursing. But I'm proud of you for knowing that, that terminology. That's old. That's a term as old as time. Don't ruin it. Yeah. But they were just like, you guys have to watch this. And we were both like, before we recorded that Patreon episode, we were just like, why did they want to? Why? Like, they really are, like, really driving this home. But Joey, after that episode, he came to Ant-Nine. He was like, okay. He popped his collar on his, you know, Vineyard Vines quarter zip. Yep. Vineyard Vines. Columbia, hey. Hey. I want one you want. And he was like, let's watch it. Give the people what they want. Yeah. Give them a nice review. Initial reviews. Yes. Yes. How do we make sure we kind of I want to say I thought that there would be more of a warm-up Before we got to You thought that they had to make the call to the bullpen Before they just started pitching Well, okay I thought we would see a slap shot Of something first I mean, before you get a slap shot You need a wrist shot, I think Is what you're referencing I know hockey. No, that's not how that would happen. See, too much references now. It's not going to be a review. We're not going to know what we're talking about. What I meant was. Because I'm confused by what you're saying. What I meant was I thought we would see hockey first to some extent before like a kiss. Well, I did see it before like a kiss. Yeah. Well, you need a wine and dine ant. He's a little like you need to take him out and then he'll order the lobster. Yeah, there's a lot of sexual tension between the two main characters. In my eyes, they kind of signify Sidney Crosby and Alexander Ovechkin. Now, imagine those two dudes were getting in love in the NHL in 2008. They had blackberries in this show. Yes, I think what we said in our initial review, as people that grew up at that time, we were 16 years old when the first episode is set, because I understand that there are some time jumps. What a tough time to be gay in hockey. yeah i mean anywhere anywhere let's make that abundantly clear but professional sports definitely in professional sports because i don't think at that point in time there had been any openly gay athletes i'm not sure i think michael sam was the first but that was until like 2010 2011 wow i thought it was after that but i don't know regardless we understand what it was like because back then you know we've openly said like you know you use hand lotion your friends would call you You're gay. Yeah. You know, you like girls. You know, you're a romantic. That was gay too back in 2000. Apparently that's coming back as gay. Don't get me started because I- Simp? When people are like, you like your girlfriend? You like your wife? You're a simp. Yeah. I'm like, what am I supposed to do? I don't get me started on it. You know how I feel about it. My brain melts down when I try to figure that out. God, I hate that. But it really did like, you know, you're seeing like the first episode, you're like, all right, it's like about an hour long, maybe like 50 minutes long. and you're like, maybe at the end they'll do like a little like wink and nod to like, this is going to be romantic. Yeah. They like, they, they got in there like 12 minutes in. Oh, they're lusting. They're there and they're like. Lusting and busting. Can we say that? No, I don't think. Careful. Judges, take that out. I think we're okay. No, that's fine. I think. LB, a little LB. A little LB. Yeah. Yeah. And like the camera shots are like, like, it's like a shot like zooming in on like, a load of laundry you know what I'm saying like not a literal load of laundry like a load of laundry yeah oh well sorry balls can we say that now oh oh you're talking about a full bag a full bag yeah yeah yeah yeah bag a dumpster bag of laundry yeah exactly you know let's be careful here and like the like they're like panting like there's that scene where they're like they get to the the gym and they're like working out next to each other and it's like oh yeah you know and like they're just working out yeah yeah and it's have you ever done that by the way like do you go to the gym and if someone's on the treadmill next to you you're like i'm racing this guy absolutely not really yeah no no way i mean i usually lose but like if someone gets on the treadmill next to me i'm like i'm not getting off until they get off it depends how many treadmills were around if it's just me and them no it's whoever's right next to me i just i just meant like i'll do it to a woman too if she's there i'm just like i'm not getting off until she gets off and then i usually get off because i'm like i'm exhausted i don't i am so in my own zone first of all i hate cardio so my only mentality doing cardio i've told you guys this is like how much until this is done right yeah i need to get off here as quickly as i can that's why i'm trying to create a competition so maybe i'd stop focusing on that i'm like how fast is she going i'm gonna go quicker and then i just burn out and i'm on the floor but that happened to those guys and they were on the floor across from each other then they got some crotch shots going. They got crotch shots. I think, weren't they like sitting like open-legged? Like a praying man? Yeah, yeah, yeah. They were like almost scissoring from across the room. And then he was just like, we can't say that? They were doing arts and crafts. They were doing arts and crafts. They were doing arts and crafts. Playing rock, paper, scissors. Rock, paper, scissors. Rock, paper, scissors from across the room. And he's just like, tension was building though. He was like, take my water. Yeah. And it was just like, whoa and then he starts drinking it and he's just like more yeah and that's when you know you're like this is this episode i mean we knew what it was could you imagine being like um like uh america is known for the people in the south is where like the open racists and homophobes are okay okay that's where like the open ones are they're sprinkled everywhere but you find them most the phobes and could you imagine being like a 70 year old just racist piece of shit because racism and homophobic tendencies tend to go hand in hand just like well i like hockey i'm gonna watch this heat of robbery is about two the two men playing a game yeah you know play and and then you find out they're watching that they're playing a game all right yeah the game of love the game of love i will say this and i said it before i will continue to say it again from what i saw from the episode i thought it was well acted i thought that are those both those kids first like job you know that's a really good question i don't think maybe not their first job but like their first thing i i think the dude that did uh that played ilia the russian i think he like was in other stuff but nothing on the the scale of the scale of this in terms of people talking about it yeah but i thought it was well acted i thought the story from what i saw was well done you know typical romance i could tell you that first of all when i watched the first episode i was like damn they're getting after it but then like i watched the second episode um also i said this when we recorded the first time this is a real thing but i really i really thought those episodes were 30 minutes so like you said we're flying by but they were an hour long and i was like time time flies when you're having a good time it's got its hooks in me i will say that oh yeah it's got something else in you maybe don't no but it's it's got its hooks in me for sure um but then as the story progresses you're like oh okay this is like a you can kind of see where it's going in the first two episodes but when you watch the rest of it you're like this is it's got its It's a feel-good thing. I'm going to be a typical lefty and say, like, you know, I love a good love story. You know, like, of course, like, there are certain things I can and can't connect to. But I thought it was well done from what I saw. You know, I know that people have said, like, continue watching. I haven't yet. But it gets to a point where, like, it continues the story. And it is very much in the zeitgeist. People are talking about it. And I think people are talking about it because it goes from zero to 60 in like five seconds. Dude. And also like the way the Russian dude is he's the Dom. Like he's Dom and what's his name? Hollander, Russianly. And the way that he sort of like flirts at times, like the text messages that he sends are hilarious. Yeah, because they text each other under a pseudonym. Jane and Lily. Jane and Lily. and people like i think if they took all of five seconds to see that and figure it out they'd put it together well that was another thing it's like you're getting a text from jane and it's like oh we play boston tonight are you hard it's like yeah they're gonna know who that is come on yeah but like in between the sexual messaging it's just like like very in-depth stuff about hockey you You know what I mean? Good luck in the playoffs. I'm jerking it right now. Yeah, exactly. Just, like, get it. We're getting excited. We're getting excited a little bit. Mute that. It's fine. Where's this thing at again? Hello, take that out. I'm excited. But, yeah, it's, like, stuff like that. Like, those are hilarious. But, yeah. Go ahead. I think it would be remiss to not bring up the fact that how, like, bad Shane Hollander is at kind of, like, flirting and hiding it a little bit. It's tough because I think that the story that I saw is that there is a sense of like, I'm finally being able to be myself, but I do need to restrict it to a degree. No, that's not what he means. I mean when like other people. People are like, oh, yo, your boy's on TV talking about the Russians. He's not my boy. What? He's not. He's like a middle schooler. We're not in love and kissing. Yeah. It's like, bro, be a little more coy here. Well, maybe that's part of the layering of the story. that he is not allowed to be at an emotional maturity level to deal with something like that because society at that time didn't allow people to be open enough to deal with that on their own. Oh, I'm like fucking Ebert Roper. I don't even know who that is. I know the name, but I don't know who that is. Did you say you ate something? Ebert Roper. Oh. I'm like Ebert and Roper. You thought that he said something? I was like, whoa, that's like I ate Roper. I don't, what is it? What is it? That? You wanna, you wanna. You don't know who Ebert, I think it's two people actually I think it's like Roger Ebert and Mike Ropert Mike feels wrong Mike is right Famous movie reviewing duo That would like No I think they were very good at breaking down Symbolism and allegories in film That's why I know those names The Drake song Two thumbs up Ebert and Ropert I was likening myself to The skills of Ebert and Ropert and saying that I was able to break it down because as you're sitting there and oogling and oogling and making, you know, oh my God, these guys are baking a cake together. Yeah. They looked like a Pisces at one time. Oh, did they? No, but they took turns. I mean, you did watch. So like during the initial review, you were open that you watched more episodes than we did. Yes. And then since then you have continued to watch. Yeah. So it's got its hooks. I mean yeah good I mean I'm not what am I gonna say don't watch no no I'm just saying I'm not waiting for you guys to watch every episode and review together I'm saying I'm I'm off to the races here it's got its hooks in me what am I gonna do no one is yeah I got the bug I got the hockey bug oh okay I was gonna say what I got the bug you know you gotta be careful people thought it was an illness at one point in time games yes oh that's not what I meant and then I believe in the dsm 3 maybe earlier versions it was diagnosed when you start talking about acronyms i get diagnostic statistic manual it's like the like say it again two times fast diagnostic statistic manual diagnostic statistic manual it is we're on the dsm 5 it's pretty good but in previous iterations i never told you i think i've told you this story i had a class in college of normal psychology and we just went through like mental illnesses and understanding blah blah blah it was It's a very interesting class. And we took a test, and one of the tests was what social norm now was once diagnosed as a mental illness. And I knew our teacher was gay. So I went to her, and I was like, listen, I know the answer, or I think I know it. But I don't want to write this out, and you think I'm a piece of shit. And she's like, what do you think it is? I was like, I don't want to say it. And she's like, what is that? I was like, okay. She goes, yes, okay. And I was like, all right, go. But it was categorizing. Oh, you like got up in the middle of a test? Yeah. Because I'd finished. I'd finished and I went to hand it in. Got 100 and five. And five. But it was. It was diagnosed as a mental illness. When you said the bug, I thought you were like doing one of those. No, no. I meant like, you know, I'm hooked. But I will say that this doesn't happen often, even though people think I look like everyone in the world. but there's a guy in the show that I actually feel like we look alike but he looks like this may be too niche I don't know but if you've ever seen the tiktoks where people will take like like they'll take like timothy chalamet's face and it'll be like this is what timothy chalamet's face if you made it look perfect and they like oh like the symmetry the symmetry thing yeah like that's what like I feel like I would look like if you did that to my face if you made my face like perfectly symmetrical and i was in a lot better shape look look right into the camera let's give people a chance to do it i know that there's someone i know there's someone that's gonna be like let's move his eyes here and like you know someone had tweeted me it was like oh wait till joe finds out he's in this show yeah i saw the picture i saw that too and i was like well i saw that and i thought it was like a joke or something but then i saw the dude on you were fully like yeah i saw him like i think maybe it was at the golden globes or something but He was on like a carpet and they're taking photos of him. And I was like, oh, it does. Like that kind of looks like a handsome Squidward version of me. I don't know if this will be a spoiler. Does he bake cakes at a certain point? A lot of batter. Oh, all right. Well, I don't know. No, no, no. Answer mine first. Then we'll unpack. What are you asking about? Piggyback. If he's, if, if he, if he is also baking cakes with Jane and Lily. He's, he's in love. There's a love story with him. Good! Getting into spoilers, I'm saying like past episode one here, I think. We are way past episode one That what I saying I just freaking out Yeah I don even know who he referencing That arc is very interesting Okay the dude name is kip I believe but he got an interesting arc Okay second to last episode Something happens. Oh my god. Oh, so you finished it Well, yeah, okay Well, yeah, okay, I mean yeah, but yeah You go how if you were to do this Cisco Epa Roper are you giving it? how many thumbs up? What is the scale? Four thumbs up was like really good. I honestly all jokes aside like I do think the show started out super hot and there's a lot of gay scenes I don't want YouTube but like there's like right off the bat you're kind of like lustful lust let's get after it but then it more it slows up but I think that's the natural like way that would go I mean most TV shows you know first of all they used to be called Pilots because this was the show that was getting the show off the ground they would have to show that so they would have to end with uh with with some you know like punch metaphorically to get people to be like i need to come back i need to come back for episode two three four whatever as we are talking about this it's because it starts at fucking a hundred yeah like a hundred dude and like no issue with that but any show that starts that aggressively like you're just going to be like whoa i was not expecting that at first what is the show there was a show recently that was like on netflix and it's like and everyone record their reaction to watching it because the opening scene is like this guy and this woman laying in bed and he's just hug like he's just i don't i remember you know what i'm talking i remember the trend i don't remember the show i don't i mean i remember when people would record to the documentary that came out where it was like the mom was cyber bullying her own daughter well yeah no that i watched i don't remember this was like older than this might have been like during covet or maybe a little after that it was a little while ago but like people would record themselves watching like oh watch the beginning uh of this i think it was i think it was a either a tv show or like a series or something like that but the opening scene so i'm like i have to see this because everyone's always like oh my god but it's a dude laying there he's hogging and i was like yo i don't know and it did no warm-up no warm-up it's like title screen right there. Well, that's how the show The Boys is. That show goes, like, and not even just, like, one episode. Every episode of that show goes from zero to a hundred instantly quick. And, like, you might, if you've not seen that show, it's on Prime Video, you might think, like, oh, how, like, I'm talking, like, exploding wangs. You see what I did there? That wasn't what I wanted to say. Like, that quick. Yeah. And it was like, so like any show that is like that, it's going to be a little bit of whiplash. I think that, you know, I saw like some of the people saying like, you know, of course, because people that don't know our show are going to see the clips of us talking about it and just be like, you know, this is, I think it's an important, again, let me be lefty frank for a sec. I think it's important to have queer representation in TV and film. I think that from what I have seen, it's a well done show. I don't talk to the president of the gays, so I don't know how the gay community feels about it. Who's that, by the way? Was Ellen DeGeneres for a while. Oh, definitely not. She was taken from her post. I don't know who would be in that role right now. I don't know. Andy Cohen is in conversation. He's at least on the board of directors I was thinking Andy Dick when you said that I was like what? Andy Dick has got some other stuff going on that needs to figure out Before You didn't see that clip that went viral? Someone found him on the street ODing Jesus No I did not see that Any idea on who the president Of the gays is? Would it be Lady Gaga? Wouldn't it technically be like Jonathan Bailey right now? He's like new That's a good one You know what though He might not be He might not have Newly elected He just got this Newly elected I don't even think I'm an elected president yet I think that You need like a OG Yeah like you need like Someone that is like Consistently like That's why I said Lady Gaga I think that she has Probably earned her right On the Mount Rushmore Sure You know who I really like Who's the dude Oh god what is he in What was the show With Steve Carell Morning show No uh Four Seasons Something like that Okay yes Do you know that show? Yes The black dude in there Coleman Domingo Bro that guy He might be the current president He could be Bro that guy's style is Unbelievable Dude Super talent I remember the first time I saw him in Euphoria Becca and I were watching the episode Where it was just him and Rue And I was like Yo this guy is fucking good That show by the way Mad underrated Euphoria? I loves that show Or Four Seasons Four Seasons You know I started What was the other show You were talking about? Euphoria I think Euphoria is appropriately rated Yeah yeah It's a very popular But like Four Seasons I feel like went under the radar like that shit was fire I didn't you know you want to know something it's filming like at the Jersey Shore like it was oh there's new stuff yeah they're doing a new season I didn't so we I think Beck and I watched like the first two episodes it's good and we just never picked it back up I liked it I love the cast so much yeah I mean you can't go wrong with Will Forte Tina Fey Steve Carell Coman Domingo yeah Will Forte's in that I forgot but yeah just kind of bringing it back full circle in terms of heated rivalry like they didn't leave anything for the imagination. I think, you know, that they definitely, like, you know, like you ever heard of, like, don't show, what's the term? Like, don't show them the cat. Let them know there's a cat there. Schrodinger's cat? No, no, no. Schrodinger's cat is something different. Don't show hole. No, that's also different. What are we saying? Ant can take the shaft of blame after this one also gets. Also, they didn't follow that rule. A lot of butt. A lot of dude. Round. Round butts. I wasn't going to say it. Round. Really round. No? The Russian dude. I feel like impressively round. I'm like, wow, that's round. Dude, dude. I didn't see anything about the butts that you see. What are you talking about? The Russian dude's butts are right there on display. I mean, they're in good shape because they're athletes. I didn't see anything where I was just like That doesn't mean that you're not being like Bro, Jesus Like the guy's got a BBL basically BBL A lot of I guess I You weren't looking in the right place I guess I was not Yeah Slow blinking over there Cause I mean I was holding my breath while I was watching Round Really round They were That's what I thought the whole time That's bad Interesting But yeah I mean definitely I think if you want to see a good love story Start off aggressive Go watch the show Yeah Definitely like You know It gets its hooks in you dude I'm telling you If you continue watching it You're gonna be like That was a good show Yeah Was there any more hockey? Yeah Oh nice There's like There's like You know Cause the first episode I don't think The equivalent of the Stanley Cup A bunch of times Right but they do the sneaky thing Where they actually don't Play hockey They kind of just film on the ice What is that? You know what I mean Nope They film on the ice? Like they're just like What are you going to do? You want them to show a whole hockey game? Yeah that's what he wants He's that guy that's just like I like some hockey Let's go watch this right now I don't think there was a puck Until 45 minutes Let's see this game guy slap shot Well now I'm watching Heated rivalry for the hockey I want to see I want to see how good they are That's it Just a little bit of both That's it You know that's it right I wanted a little more hockey You know Like what are you That's like going to the You got the NHL for that Yeah You know I'm here I'm just here for the hockey Yeah I'm not here for the Russian round But Just you know Just say the quiet part out loud My friend It's okay You can watch it Oh that's so funny You know Yeah So Well Watching it for the hockey is great But yeah A lot of stuff there But apparently there's like a lot of books too. So like, yeah, it's based off a series of books and like, I think we looked it up during our initial review. The first, I think the first one is called Heated Rivalry. And there's like Game Changer. Game Changers. The Long Shot. The Long Shot. That's the one. Crazy. Take Drifts. Common Goal. Common Goal. That's a good one. That one feels like a, like a, like a, DP. So, we did this whole segment. So close. So close I was just using letters I'm letting you know now But doesn't that sound like that though? Common I think the common goal would be in reference to reaching a Oh It's like you say it really Yeah say it really fast Say it really fast Common goal Oh that's not Like you know Gotta pay the troll toll to get into this boy's soul First of all You know You know Don't do this Already in the beginning you both were wrong about what I was saying, and then that was completely not what I was saying. I'm not jumping in on that. Well, you've seen that episode of Sonny. I don't know what you're talking about. You've never seen Sonny? Oh, that was just Sonny. You know that episode of Sonny where they do the play, where they do the Nightman. I saw it. Okay. Thank God. I saw it. You know, God, a play. One of the best episodes of TV I've ever seen in my entire life. Full stop. You know. When he goes, what is that? And he cocks a gun. He goes, you know what it is, bitch. Oh, man. Gotta pay the troll toll to get into this boy's hole. You gotta pay the troll toll to get in. Yeah. I can recite that whole episode, I think, line for line. It's a great episode, honestly. One of the best ever on television. Yeah, well. But yeah. Yeah, I don't know how, when we send it off to past selves, how the vibes of the episode are, if it continues this. Yeah. Well, listen. Yeah, I don't know. We don't. We don't. We apologize for the. Because we're obviously in different stuff. You know, like, and it wasn't our fault. We wanted to make sure that you guys didn't miss out on an episode. So we wanted to give you what you like, which is Joe. Ebert and Roper. Can I say gooning? What? Can I say gooning? Gooning. Oh, you're saying me? Yeah. No, I wasn't gooning. Well, we got it. I like rom-coms. Even though it's like more of a rom. Yeah, it's more of a rom-drom. A rom-drom. A rom-drom. A rom-dromance. A hawk rom-drom. hot drawmans now it sounds like we're gonna conjure up spirits yeah furniture is gonna start levitating here um but yeah so that's our new review um i guess let's go over to our older selves yeah so let's we'll just do editing we'll just do the editing though we don't have to do that all right see ya there's no easy way to transfer to this but we do have some sponsors for today The first one is Hungry Root. Hungry Root plans my groceries for the weeks. It shops for me and delivers everything that matches my goals, delivery preferences, and budget. So you kind of plug in everything that you need, and they go to work for you. 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And speaking of holes, I have something for you boys. Oh, okay. So this has been bouncing around tick tock. I'm curious, how would you count the number of holes on this salt shaker? What would be your method? Uh, can, can, let's just start with like what's the first hole you're looking at i'm i'm i'm looking not at a first hole i'm looking at a series of holes right and then how would you count those which one i'm doing the circle around the middle hole so i would go with those six wait this here yeah okay you count those first i would segment it that way because it's easier for my eyes to to do that interesting Personally. So like I would do that. So I see that that's six, then one in the middle, and then the five dots around, no, the six dots around the end. So seven, 13, right? 13 holes. So you'd count it this six in the circle. Yep. One in the middle. And then the outer ring. Yes. That is very interesting. It's easier for my eyes to break it up like that. Yeah. Cause like I break it up in the, I take the middle part of it, break it up, and then I can count the outside and inside easier personally why what are you guys doing i feel like if we added one more ring of circles you're you're not counting this i mean to be fair that's you're asking me how i would count this one okay i would only really count this if i was in a very awkward like socially awkward situation i'd be like let me just count these things because i don't want to look up um i think i would start in the upper left like there and just kind of like get the ones that are near there and then kind of go what's like to the right near there as in you go one one two the one across mid and then maybe that one in the middle and then like maybe i would continue that way i don't know i'm also thinking of it i would also count it by line so one five eight uh twelve thirteen honestly what you said i'm like i feel like i would do the opposite where i would count the out out in so i would go one two three four five and then count the inner ring and then the one in the middle yeah i just in my head the way that it works is to break it up into different sections you know and and just looking at that shape that seems like the easiest way to do that to look at it as three different shapes bro i'm staring at this and i'm like there's holes appearing and disappearing yeah like i'm like it's like a fucking it's tripping me out i think i would do just lines so i would go one two three four five six seven eight nine ten eleven twelve thirteen just lines that makes sense i honestly don't think i would be good at counting this usually if i have to do something like this i do it more than once because i'm not very like i love i'll randomly be like the other day i was in the steam room and i was like let me count the tiles in here and like oh you got a little bit of the you got you got the you know what i mean you got a little bit of it's got going on a smidge i would say at least a smidge i like to count stuff counting is cool because it's something i know I'm good at. Counting? Yeah. How high? Pretty high. Wait, you counted the tiles? Yeah, but I did it by using mathematic equations. So I was just like, I'm not going to sit here and count every single tile, but I'll count across, I'll count down, and I'll take the area of that wall, and then I'll look over and do that one. Sometimes I'll get into this mood where I'll just start counting my steps. Like, I'll be walking on the sidewalk, and I'm like, one, two, three. And I'll get up to over 100, and I'm like, what am I doing? Dude, what I used to do is when I used to walk home from the train when I lived in Astoria, I would, at a random point on the walk, I would say a number guessing how many steps it would be from where I was to my house. Out loud? Out loud. So I'd be on like Ditmar's and Steinway. Yeah. And I'd go like 1,406. And then I would walk and count every step, and then I give myself one time to adjust and then just play a little game of myself Did you ever like nail it Yes one time Really Like like nailed it Like you nailed it Like I was like Hollander dude like yeah, well, Hollander. He was the nail. He received, he received the nailing. Yeah. From the hammer. Yeah, right. Exactly. But I was like a couple blocks away and I was like, you know, like 684. and then I was like two blocks away and I was like I can adjust but no I'm gonna stick with 684 and it was 684. Did you start like these were your normal steps but then you're no no no no I and like I kept the same stride and pace you know I I did my best you know there was no like puddles I was jumping over. That's funny. I just love doing stuff like that. I count stuff. Do you count stuff? Sometimes sometimes I'll count. Do you know how many uh stairs you you have in your house exactly? No. Well I live in an apartment. Okay well what about yeah that you don't count. So then he does know how many he has zero so let's say your top floor do you know how many the exact number of stairs it is from your middle floor to your top floor i feel like it's important to know i don't know that in my mom's house that i grew up in i think it's because like you ever carrying something and it's blocking your vision i know my my steps oh i can do this oh i just i stop and i wipe my foot so like i go down and i like i kick my foot around yeah just to see like is there another step am i on the ground i can also tell by the um like the texture of the ground if it's wood if it's a tile or something i also am so bad at that that if i if something is impeding my vision i've because my mom's house is like two steps and then like a little landing and then the stairs go up like that so coming down those steps and getting to the landing and you're just anticipating another step and i just go boom like that which is like because i'm like thinking there's another step and i just like hit the hit the deck or some shit but i've done that so many times in my life Joey's childhood house also had famously one of his staircases was missing a step. Yeah. Just a hole. It was a hole. Like on several accounts, like several occasions, we had told people like, careful of the sixth step. And they'd say, why? Because there isn't one. And it was just a hole into the floor. You know. It happens. Things fall apart at times. And they last a long time, which is an issue. But was it a fixed now? A stairs to the basement kind of situation? It was a stairs to the basement. Yeah. If it was, you know, the middle floor or something, that'd be tougher to explain. Yeah, only we were going into the basement. I'm sure we were the ones that caused it to break in the first place. I'm certain of it. I mean, my mom would do laundry in the basement. Like, that's where the laundry machine was. Yeah, but your mom has steps like a little pixie, you know what I mean? Like, she walks like she basically floats on air. She floats down the steps. We were running down those steps. Yeah, dude. Feels like a key through the, like, leg through the stair kind of thing. Could have been. I actually don't remember how that happened, but, I mean, that's a, that's a very safe bet could have been do you remember when we tried to put me down the stairs in the sterilite like storage bin oh yeah that was like a so many times i've done that yeah yeah or a hamper you ride it down the stairs in the hamper if don't do it kids and if it goes well if it goes the way you want it to go you slide right down you but you actually hit the floor and topple over and that's probably what you don't want no i imagine you would want that because your momentum brings you if you hit the floor and stop you come to a complete stop that's what i mean and you just flip over but the flip over is better because your momentum is continuing and it can die down a little but if you just hit and you don't move i actually think that one time we did do something like that and my foot went right through the closet that's right there because it had like those slats yeah and i just like kicked it open god my parents whatever god bless them for raising all of us in that house see my steps had like the metal track on the the yeah you know what i'm talking about on the tread yeah so like if i went down those i was i wasn't i wasn't gonna be in good shape yeah you'd be roughed up and be a little roughed up but you know everyone takes a nice good roughing just like hollander hollander yeah and we'll probably continue taking it. My grandma's old house had a boxing bag hanging from the ceiling in the basement. Like a heavy bag? And we would swing from it. You would swing from the heavy bag? I mean, as a kid, what else are you going to do? Punch it? Yeah, that's stupid. It hurt my hand. I imagine that's the thing to do. Just swing from it. What's in those, by the way? Sand? Gotta be. What else would you put in there? Water? I mean, you pop it. I think of the scene of the Avengers, where Chris Evans Captain America hits it and then sand just bursts everywhere. Because he's so strong. He is so strong. Bro, speaking of Chris Evans, I just watched a show Defending Jacob. Did you see that? You were telling me about that. I didn't watch it. Is it good? Dude, embarrassed to say this, but me and Nicole watched the entire series in one sitting. Why is that embarrassing? Because it's fucking like seven hours. I am a big proponent of smoke it if you got them. You know what I'm saying? Like if they're giving it to you all at once, just do it. Seven hours of television straight is bananas. But it's one of those like mystery things. You're like, I got a fucking no. So I couldn't stop watching. I love a good mystery. I love mysteries. I watched weapons and I was like, ooh, what's going on? I love detective shit. Like I wish I could be a detective. Or sometimes I watch shows where detectives are like figuring stuff out. And I'm like, oh, I love that. Like the first 48 or something like that. Well, I just, I also, All Her Fault is another one. And it's like, what's the guy, Pena, Pena, Pena, Pena. Michael. Michael Pena. He's like a detective and he's like figuring stuff out. And he's like, oh, okay, piece this together, blah, blah, blah. He's interviewing people. And I'm like, I would love this. That's why I really enjoyed rewatching Dexter. And that's why I like the new Knives Out, Wake Up Dead Man. Because he does it in such a, Daniel Craig does it in such a bombastic, you know, coming to Benoit Blanc and he doing it like that. I love it. That's what he does, dude. That's what he does. Bombastic. Well, that's what he does. He comes in his lock mask. Good sir. I wish I talked like that. Do you ever wish, like, give me your top five accents you wish you had. I wish I had some sort of, like, UK accent. UK? Yeah, just any of them. There's a hundred million, but, like, one of them would be nice. All right, so give me your top five, as I asked before. Okay. Take it easy Should I count that? That was really No, that was not That was really sassy No, that was not It was sassy Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no Unlimited sass I've been sassed up No, we said it was verbal Okay, like I said before You fucking idiot We said it would be verbal bitches Not, not But that was a bitching Yeah, a little bit Throwing that sass around, Frankie Yeah, yeah, yeah That was crazy, dude Who's side are you on? Who's side is he supposed to be on? Mine! because we're getting the money together. Oh, so he is splitting it. Might be on Frankie's side. Well, no, meaning like you're also getting $10 and I'm also getting $10. Whoa, now it's $20? Back to Joe's side if I get two bucks per. I'm not playing this. I'm giving you 10 bucks per. No, you're making him spend 20. He's not going to do that for me. I'm not doing any of this. So top five accents you would most want to have. I would say that one. You just said European. I said UK. You said UK. British. Okay. British accent What kind of British Are we talking like High-end Brit Are we talking like A fucking Like this Yeah like Tom Hardy In uh Peaky Blinders Or Peaky Blinders Okay Uh yeah I love that accent I think that's awesome So you want to be a blinder A Peaky fucking Fucking Fuck Fucking hell Yeah Yeah I would love that Okay Um I think also And the people that are watching this In England Are just like That's a very specific Like they know exactly which one it is yeah yeah yeah because like i said there's so many of them like i think you go like a 10 miles north and it's completely different uh i would like that um i think like having a spanish accent would be cool but like what spanish are we talking are we talking you know which one spain like a spania but we don't eat even it didn't until midnight i'm talking about Dominican? I'm trying to think of an actor that would have... Javier Bardem, Antonio Banderas. Who's the guy that voiced death in Puss in Boots? Come on, Frankie. Puss in Boots is actually a good accent. Wagner Mora. Oh, he just won. Apparently that movie's incredible. The Secret Agent or something? I would love that. Yeah, that's a good one. I like that accent. I'll take that. I want like a Scouse accent That's fun Which one's that? That's like You know Paddy the Batty? Or Owen Cooper I think he is Who's Paddy the Batty? He's in the UFC You've never seen him? You don't get knocked out Paddy Pemblitt? Yeah Okay I didn't know his nickname was The Batty Yeah dude No offense Come fuck him up dude But yeah Like an accent like that I think is so fucking funny Who was the Like Scottish like sounding Scottish I mean yeah it's hilarious well I mean careful you don't want to offend Paddy the baddie he might come here and take your hattie off yeah put me in a fucking rear naked Scottish would be cool like a David Tennant Alan Cumming Scottish or like a real Italian would be cool too okay I think that's such a like a nice sounding language I mean the language it's but but it's a little dramatic for me if you had the the accent but not the language doesn't that kind of take away from it like to be clear i'd rather speak these languages than just have the accent obviously gotcha okay but i know part of you wants like a southern accent a little bit no i'm talking no not at all what about boston certainly not certainly not what about like delaware water gap like philly yeah i will say the baltimore accent is is stavros that bit he does is so fucking funny yeah i i feel like the the the baltimore accent is so funny like i i wasn't really uh aware of it until you know the last like five years really like i knew they had an accent but i never like really like mayor of east town was the first one to like put it on tv and stuff like that right wow that was a good show speaking of detectives you know another see i'm all over the detective shit the the like delaware water gap you know like we're going for a hoagie yeah go birds it's it's also like what are you like how did this come there yeah like it's very specific it is it is it is it makes no sense yeah it's like only you have it so strange it is it is crazy to think about accents because like we live in the same place but it's so like people say that a lot about new york bro you ever hear the memphis accent oh my god no i don't think i've heard a memphis so like when you say human but they say herman herman and music music yes You ever seen Glorillo get interviewed and shit? I thought she was from St. Louis. Nah, I think she's from, or maybe I'm mixing people up. I'm pretty sure it was. Well, it was like Chingy right there. Well, I don't think it's St. Louis. I'm pretty sure it's Glorillo. Because she did an interview with Speedy where she was like bearded for spirit. I don't know who Speedy is. He's an interviewer for Complex. That dude's hilarious too. But It's like Is she from Memphis? I don't I think that Justin Tiberlake is That ain't what I'm talking about Cause he talks like this That doesn't sound like him at all That sounds exactly like him Yes Glorilla Memphis, Tennessee Yeah, yeah, yeah So they say like Herman Like it's a human So I'm like that's I would need to hear it Before I can ever make any Judgments about it I'll tell you which ones I definitely would want I've openly said I don't like the Boston one I think that I don't like it It's just It's hilarious to me though Yeah but also it just feels like I don't want it I don't know how else to say that I know what you're going to say You're saying it's going to feel dumb Is that what you're going to say? No no no that's not what I was going to say Okay But also I would hate the like Valley California Yeah The vocal fry I hate that You know like here like that Yeah Like that What the fuck Oh, shit. Shut up. Yeah. I'm surprised Australian's not in there. Oh, that's a good one. I like that one, too. Australian just feels like it's a cool club that I can't be in. You know what I mean? I can't do it. Like, it seems like they're in it, and they're like, good eye. You know? Yeah, fuck, mate. Yeah, fuck. Fucking cunt. Fucking cunt. Like, yeah, I love how, like, yeah, they're just cool. Yeah, that's a good one I'd like, too. I don't really, the only two accents I could say I really don't like are those two I just mentioned. Boston and, you know, like that valley, SoCal, like, you know. But I also, like I said before, I dated a Brazilian girl in high school, and I hated that accent. Yeah, you did. You know, because it was like Hispanic and also Russian. Yeah. So it'd be like, I just wish I could speak anything other than English. I mean, you can. You can sit down and pop on one of those speaking apps. What are they called? I feel like I'm surprised. like when I was in Spain I was able to understand like a decent amount like okay so I it's like I have something like some people have absolutely nothing in just English but like when you are in Spain everyone knows like five languages and I'm just like I'm an American loser. I always think about this my grandfather spoke seven languages he was polylingual. That's so sick. Which what the fuck are we doing like I could barely speak English yeah you know seven is probably four too many. If you had to pick two more. For me? Yeah. You know, my Spanish is so broken that I'm not even going to be able to say that I speak it. Yeah, Spanish has to be in there. I think it would have to be Spanish and then. Yeah, what would you pick after that? If you know Spanish, you kind of know Italian. Like they're so similar. You'd be able to figure it out. You could get by. You could more than get by. You know. Can you speak Italian? I used to be able to fully understand it, But now I'm losing I lost it Does your dad speak it? He can But even here He's starting to lose it Can you say something in Italian? Just Pizza Alright You know see That was so disrespectful Yeah this guy Does he warrant a bitch? I don't know You want me to call on yellow right now And fucking tell him You're disrespected You know what Your dad's gonna see this You've been really mean to us lately Oh my god And like The cameras are on So I wanna make sure That the world sees this Like if your dad sees this I It's kinda crazy you talk to your boss like this and i feel i legitimately bullied like i feel like you hurt you you hurting me and and i think we have been like he's here we try to talk with him nice like we try to like bring him stuff and then it's just like making fun of us and it almost feels like your job's probably in peril this is like i feel like i don't know like i get i'd like i don't know how to feel i'd like to have a good environment but then you come in and you just kind of car crash so much of this show is our dynamic and being able to like move well and talk well exactly And then he comes in And he's just like I got a big penis And got a big dick Got big balls Imagine dragging them Across your face Exactly that You know Yeah I know He will see that Yeah Yeah Good job Yes Yes Thank you If we can get your Multi-billionaire dad With giant nuts To fucking like us That'd be sick But you Are you full Italian? Yes Like Why did you look Like I asked a math problem Disappointed like yes i think my mom my mom's side had a little bit of irish like english ah okay i mean technically all of us are not full anything you know like even if we're half it's like 30 things in there definitely definitely italian like majority italian have you been to um what's that place called italy yeah i thought have you been to italy i have i've been okay would you you love that one it was it was it was really good um have you been to uh that place Where the fuck is it? Room 40? What the fuck? The Italian spot? Room 40? Suck my ass, dude. You're not... Have you been to Room 40? Nice try. Nice try. We have some sponsors, though. You know what? Read the ads, and then I'll let you have your moment. We have some sponsors. You know, we have SeatGeek. SeatGeek is where you're going to buy all your tickets to any events that you want to go to. 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We're all kind of guilty of it, signing up for free trials here or signing up for stuff, using it for two months, never using it again, but still paying for it. It happens. And this will help you kind of consolidate all of your expenses in one place and be able to cancel things and realize, okay, this is $10 a month. Now I'm saving some money. It's $120 a year. And that's just one thing. So you can put the money back in your pocket. So yeah, Rocket Money, it'll help you reach your financial goals faster. You can join at rocketmoney.com slash basement. That is rocketmoney.com slash basement. Okay? So, yeah. Put that money back in your pocket, folks. Rocketmoney.com slash basement. So. It's a good try. Try it again. Just do it again. For the clip. We got it. Have you ever been to Room 40? Room 40. Room for these nuts in your face. What the hell? Got him. Drilled him. Wow. Absolutely got him. You got me so good. I did. You know what? I applaud that effort. Yeah. Oh, I think Joe pointed at you, actually. He did. That another one I got insulted and I made some money That the internet today baby Yeah you want to play around i call your dad right now i call your dad and tell me you been messing around his dad what he said to us after the boston show because his dad was at the boston show he came to us and came up to us after the boston show and he said my dad might be here but i want you to know you embarrassed me in front of my family you son of a bitch you embarrassed me he said you embarrassed me in front of my family they were here and excited and now they're pissed off because you guys suck. Do you know how your phone gives you random pictures like memories or whatever? Yes. I got one the other day from the Boston show and it's just you with the bluest mouth I've ever seen in my life. They gave us a cake after we won World Sexiest Podcast. Huge. And they gave us a cake. So if there's a cake, if I walk into a room and there's a cake addressed to me, I have to at least try it. Did you eat the hot dog cake? i had i think a little bite of that i didn't think i tried that i had a little bite what's up hot dog made of cake or cake made a hot dog a hot dog made of cake that was at st louis we've we've openly spoken about we keep track on the green rooms at these places that's still up there that's still up there that was that was a good green room man yeah um i actually it's funny that you brought up hot dog boys give me strength i almost had a hot dog the other day and i really tried not to in the winter yeah tried not to i i succeeded i walked out of there back and i walked out of there yeah where were you so uh there's a place in uh jersey it's like iconic it's called jersey freeze uh and it is like an ice cream spot but it's been around since like the 50s but they also do like dogs burgers chicken fingers and stuff like that so we got ice cream and then you can go sit where they have the food and i'm sitting there and becca and there's a there's an old lady double double my age at least old bag sitting right behind me nice and she's got two dogs she's double she's barrel dogging double barrel dogging on a date with her pop i would believe husband it was very cute actually you know that's part of me i'm a soft void now and becca's like apparently the hot dogs here are really good so i was like how what is she doing by saying that well she's supporting her husband that's what she's fucking doing she knows what she's doing she knows what she's doing it gets better and then i was because she's like oh we used to come here all the time as kids she's like it was perfect we'd have a basketball game and then after the game we'd all meet up here nice and she's like we'd come with like three bucks we'd get a two hot dogs and a soda or a hot dog soda and a burger or whatever and she's like how much you think a hot dog is now i was like let's go check so we go to the front and i'm looking can't find the price of a hot dog anywhere so she's like do they even have hot dogs i was like they got them look at them right there they were glistening shiny bastards oh they looked they were spitting at you and she's like it'd be crazy to have one and i'm like post ice cream hot dog is kind of a wild move. It's a genius move. Was it mid-ice cream? No, the ice cream was great. It was gone? No, I'm saying were you in the middle of the ice cream? I finished the ice cream. I fully finished the ice cream. What kind of ice cream? Oh, I went a classic vanilla soft serve with rainbow sprinkles on a cone. No sauce? No sauce. Okay. I'm a classic American baby boy. You don't go caramel? Not on a soft serve. It'll melt it. Not hot caramel, just a broom temp caramel. if you're not going hot why are you going it i go cold i want this thing to be shot right out of a warm machine i get you you know that saying that in our yeah yeah i love when it comes out hot but we walk out and she's like oh man that would be really good and we get in the car and i go i will go get a fucking hot dog right now yeah and i didn't wow i maintained my strength so you still don't know how much they cost no i'll be honest for you it doesn't matter i know it doesn't ten dollars what the hell i bet they're good then yes and then if it's really like it's a dollar we can't pass up on that yeah so it really does i'm really trying my best the other night she goes uh she goes we should we should do a hot dog night soon for for the kids and i'm like oh my god yeah but let's wait until baseball starts because every year for the start of like opening day of baseball i come home and becca has hot dogs about hot dog uh it's a hot dog night with with just unlimited condiments i mean i'm i'm a simple boy i get two condiments but it's nice to have a choice though oh yeah and uh oh yeah the place is creaking oh okay uh but uh creaking fucked me up oh wow you're scared i'm scared bro that's fine i'm trying to fucking talk about you're talking about the hot dogs and there's 50 fucking condiments or whatever that you can choose from dog so she's like we're gonna have hot dog night i was like let's wait because the world baseball classic is coming so we can early we can jump early on the hot dogs when is this again world baseball classic but march 6th i think is the day i know you know the day um even then though it's pretty early to the game no such thing and then um she was like no let's bring the kids to go get hot dogs at jersey freeze i was like let's go tomorrow i thought let's go back i thought she was saying like let's control it at our home and then i could be like let's wait let's wait let's wait yeah so now it's like you want me to go into jersey mike's what's it jersey freaks jersey freaks it's jersey freeze it is like really really good do they wear old timey like ice cream man hats no but they do have like the old timey machines like the big fucking big machines that dispense the cold you know like the soft serve oh yeah yeah yeah yeah it was good nice uh but i want to go to one of those places that like it's like a candy shop but It looks like a bar, but they serve ice cream and shit. Well, there's that place on the Upper East Side, isn't there? Is there? It's like they still serve Coca-Cola the way it was done in like 1901. Yeah, that's what I mean. Sands, cocaine. Yeah, it's like they put syrup and they just like mix it or whatever. Syrup and fucking soda water and then they go like that. I've seen those videos and I'm like, I know that sucks. No way. I know that sucks. That's got to be amazing. I feel like, you know, aesthetically it looks cool. What do we got to do to get you an egg cream in your body? Oh my God. I guess I go to lunch with my mom. She loves them. Because it's just, isn't it just like? It's ice cream and like. Seltzer? Yeah. God. It's like, why, mom? I've had one in my life. She made me have one. Really? Yeah. Let's do one. I would have it. I mean, it's ice cream, so I'm going to be happy. I mean, I won't be happy. You know what I haven't had in a long time that I would like? An eclair. What kind of those? What, you mean like an ice cream eclair or a. No, no, no. Like a pastry. Yeah. You know what? Oh boy are they? Oh to the brim? They're filled brother Wow Custard Nice Custard I want one of those There was something else recently that I was like oh man Oh you know what I hate? That like I think this is a hot take because people love them Black and white cookies? Disgusting Whack So trash They're so whack So trash Also, and I've said this to you guys The rainbow cookies? Whack You need to be sent Those are whack dude You need to send up states, and you need to allow me to take a bullet and put it in the back of your fucking head. Yo, people love those cookies. Yo, they're not that good. Nah, you're bugging. You're bugging. Italians love it. I know, you guys. I love it. I'm not an Italian. I love them, too. I know, but you look like Italian. For such a smart guy. They're so good. I don't like them. I think that place, actually, Jersey Freeze, does like an Italian cookie ice cream. Oh, nice. Like, it's like they mix it in with like, yo. Anything that, like when the cookies come in a tin and they have like those and then they have like the real dusty ones. I'm like, all these suck. For the first time recently, there was a deli that I went to that gave me some butter cookies. Butter cookies are. The Italian ones that come in like the bag on like that flower-shaped golden plate. You know what I'm talking about? First time I've ever had one of those, I was like, wow, this is actually a good cookie. Every other one I've had, they just crumble in your mouth and they're dust. Yeah. I actually will admit the rainbow cookies that come in the package you're talking about aren't great. You need more wet ones. Yeah, you need like legit deli ones. Yeah, you need wet ones. If you get like mass produced, they're garbage. Yeah, because they're hard then. I don't like the dusty shit. No, a good Italian, a good rainbow cookie is kind of wet. Wet. It's wet as hell. It's really wet. And like, I'm not like a tres leches almost. Like not soaked, but like you bite into it and you're like, this is more water than it is dry. I'd rather that. It's What? Tres leches? Well I love Tres leches I love You know Give me all three of them Give me all three milks No dude You're crazy We need You know Listen You got a guy That was a tiramisu You got a tiramisu guy Get a fucking Rainbow cookie guy Dude I will so quickly Get rainbow cookies Get a fucking Rainbow cookie guy Not just rainbow cookies Let's get an assortment going You want an assortment? Yeah We should do A whole episode On Patreon.com Pastries That's the basement yard Where we review Pastry on This is incredible It's really good This is absolutely Pastry on Get a bunch of pastries And then Oh get a A Shvoia del A Shvoia del A lobster tail The fucking Pignolis Which I don't like Isn't a lobster tail The same thing No There's There's a There's difference Okay I think You know what Remember Luguli's So Exactly Love that place Great Italian ices But you The best orange ice I've ever had in my entire life They have great ices. What a simple concept. Spumoni, though? Shut up. Spumoni is like a Frank Sinatra. It reminds me of Frank Sinatra. Yeah, and he's a good musician. But he is dead. He's dead and old. But they always had, you know the rock candies? Yes, they'd have them in the thing. Yeah. People use those for like cappuccinos and stuff like that. Really? Oh, to like mix. Becca and I went to a steakhouse the other day. They had rock candy? And they, she got a cappuccino and they put a thing of rock candy on her plate and she, to sweeten it up, she stirs it with that. That's actually very useful. Yeah. Oh, I thought you were going to say something. I'm going to yell at him again for not getting more fucking pastries. We'll get a bunch. Did you just text your pastry connect? I texted the person who will text the connect, yes. Also get some Greek pastries because the Greeks know how to do pastries also. Also get more tiramisu. Tiramisu. And 80 pastries. Ganolis. Rainbow cookies. Pignolis Whatever that one is That looks like an ass Huh? You know what I'm talking about Do they do donuts there? Nah Donuts are not Italian We're fancy Fancy place Fancy place Who's we? It's not even yours You gotta text a guy To text a guy You know how to fucking We don't do it What the fuck And I'm talking like Get some Greeks in Get some Greek stuff in here Get some fucking baklava Oh my god I'll fucking Galactaburico Oh my god Where'd you go? What'd I say? Oh my god Oh my god The Greeks and the Italians know how to do their fucking pastry. Yo, baklava's sticky as a motherfucker, though. You've been to Stamati's, right? When they give you the complimentary Galactaburico at the end? Wait, what? No. Bro, I actually had this, like, I think it's Arabic. I was at a coffee place, and they're like, oh, this is like our pastry, and I forget the name of it, but I had it, and I was like, this shit is fucking crazy. So Galactaburico, I know I'm saying it right, I don't know how to spell it, don't even ask. Thebootigo? Yeah. Don't let thebootigo. Gala, where did thebootigo? Right. And it's like a custard, and then it's like flaky phyllo dough on top, and then it's covered in like a vanilla honey syrup. Oh, fuck my balls. It'll fucking, yeah, it will. Yeah. It'll take your balls, and it'll shred them to shreds. What is custard? It's just like a thickened pudding, kind of like pudding. Like pudding is, I think, technically a custard, but it's a little thicker. Okay. I'm into it. I'm into it, bro. When shit has custard, I'm like, this is probably going to be it. I think what's in, because you love French cream donuts, right? What are they called? Boston cream Fresh cream That's custard in there Oh yeah It's like pudding Am I right? If I had that accessible to me I could literally drink it What's it called? Creme brulee That's a custard under there Is flan technically a custard? Get some flan in here by the way I will fucking dump No way you Italians flan it up in that bakery That's the Hispanics Yeah. That's the Hispanic. You know how he hates them. Right. Right. Hey, by the way, Ant's dad, if you're still watching this, he said he hated me because I was Hispanic. Yeah, he did say that, and that was so fucking sad. It was. And that's, you know. I've never been identified and attacked because of my nationality and heritage. It's not really something I want in the workplace either. It's got to stop. It's just something that I feel like I can't let go. You work your whole life establishing the basis for your self-worth. And in a minute, that can crumble. And, you know. And a part, I mean, it's jeopardizing everything that we're kind of trying to stand for here. We're very forward-facing with our personalities. I think a lot of people like this show, like us, like the studio, because the people that you see are the people that you get. We're trying to keep it light and silly. And unfortunately, there's a person that comes in and does stuff like that. and is now mocking me. Do you see how he's mocking you? He's mocking me like a mocking bird. Completely undercutting your ability to feel real emotions. You're mocking me like a mocking bird, which reminds me of Tequila Mockingbird, which... Which also Tequila Tequila. What? Tequila Mockingbird. Oh, Tequila Tequila. Yeah. Oh. What? Well, Tequila Mockingbird and Tequila Tequila, two things that say the N word. I thought you said Tequila. I'll say that. I'll say that I thought you said Tequila Mockingbird I know Tequila I know To kill a mockingbird I didn't know I was waiting for the What tequila mockingbird is Oh I don't know what that is But what the fuck is that Hold on wait a sec Business idea I already bought this You know we almost got out of the episode With you doing that It was close A tequila brand Called tequila mockingbird Just don't even What is that It's a little violin I saved for when Frankie was you know complaining about something oh so you're saying frank complained so much that you're like i gotta get a toy yeah but then it turned it was just useful here yeah i complain about something a lot i don't let them turn us against each other here i don't point at me i'm not my hands down don't you worry yeah i didn't say you complain a lot i said if you've ever complained like in the future. I don't know if you said that. No, no, no, brother. No, no, no. You said when Frankie complains saying that's inevitable. Let's play it off here. It's actually a beautiful instrument. I wish. I really wish. That just reminds me of the Godfather by the way. It also sounded like the Godfather meets Titanic. I think it's just a violin, that's why. Yeah. See how rude that was? Do you see how rude that was? You don't gotta tell me. I'll get in touch with the powers that be. With your father. Yeah. When did your father get the word of this? Yeah. That's been on my desk for like two months. I've been waiting for a moment. This is going to be the second worst day of your dad's life, dude. The first one is when they were like getting rid of Christopher Columbus Day or whatever. Yeah. I imagine. I imagine he was not happy about that. I imagine. How much more can they take? How much more? What the hell? We don't have anything. It's just a day. You're an American hero. you know oh man um well i think that's all we have for today what a fun episode yeah that really was a fun episode hey great job all around boys i will say that the best thing to come out of this episode is the fact that we had the idea of the pastry on because i am ready to eat i am so proud of you i'm so for pastry on i'm so excited to eat pastries there's nothing better in this world a few things are better just do me a favor if we do get these cup of whole milk you could get your almond milk or whatever you fucking drink in Brooklyn. You probably... I would just like, I need, when something is that decadent and rich, I need a cup of whole milk. It's also gonna dry me out, so I will need some wet. Okay. That's the way you put it. Yeah, I will need something wet to wet me up. You need something to fucking wet your throat. Yeah. At the end of the full circle, baby. Full circle moment, baby. Full circle. Heated rivalry. Start with wet throats, end on them. There you go. Whoa. Alright. Well... I want to make sure I say this openly. Yeah. Make sure you tell the person that does our graphics to pick the one for this one very carefully. I wonder who's going to be who. I mean, I hope that neither of us are. I think it's maybe just us in hockey stances. Well, one of us has to be the Russian. The other one has to be the Canadian. Okay, but we don't need to be like fucking like, oh, yeah. You know. Yeah, I don't think it's going to be two guys. You never know because you guys have had to give some notes in the past. We would. This feels like one that we're going to have to go back and forth with Manu about. Yeah, I'm imagining just the hockey face-off thing. Hockey face-off is good. I don't know if you two have to be stacked. Yeah, we can't have this. I want to make sure I say that on the record. Yeah, Frank's kids are going to see this photo. We can't do that. Yeah. That's so funny. All right, where can they find you, Frank? The Frank Alvarez all over social media. Make sure you check out the Patreon, patreon.com slash thebasementyard where we will have a pastry episode soon. You fucking believe it. Okay? And you know what? We could sprinkle in some pastry facts. Like, where does the word cannoli come from? These are all good things that we could possibly do. We're going to leave that part out. It's Italy. We're just going to eat them. We're just going to eat them and talk about life. Let's have a real, like the pastry episode. Let's make it like we're old Italian men sitting at the table and there's, you know. Oh, should we wear glasses and kangles? Kangles, glasses, wigs. Newspaper. Newspaper. you know, let's really commit like a fucking Firenze Italia shirt. Yeah, yeah, yeah. An undertone of like general racism and stuff. Do you still have your tutti jersey? I never bought a tutti jersey. Oh, okay. But I definitely would want one. I wanted one. You know what? Maybe your dad can come in here so we can have some positivity in this room. I don't know if he's the one you want in here for positivity in the room. I don't know either. What would happen if on the episode I asked him about Christopher Columbus Day? I don't think it'd be like, who's that probably? Really? Who's that? The guy who directed Home Alone? Look it up. It is. It's Chris Columbus. He's Christopher, though. Where can I find you, bud? You can find me at antprisco on Instagram. You're welcome. And that just bought me something with custard, hopefully. Yeah. We could take away one of your points. Thank you. I appreciate it. You guys can follow me at Joe Sanagato and go follow the show at the Basement Yard on TikTok and Instagram. And that is all. See you guys next time