Hey guys, Graham here. It's Friday, which means we get to share with you another one of our most popular clips from a past interview. This week, Burt Kreischer. The clip you're about to hear is trending on our Instagram right now. Hope you enjoy. How does one become a sixth year senior? You know, a lot of procrastination. A lot of just putting off life decisions. I didn't know that you had to declare a major after a certain point. I just thought everyone would leave at a certain point. I just never started leaving. And by the way, I have no regrets in college. I have no regrets, meaning I did it perfectly. I did it perfectly. You didn't go back to Florida State, though, for a while because you didn't feel great about how it ended. I had a taste in my mouth at the end. The people that were in charge of the school at the time were cruel. The English department was cruel, and the president was cruel. How so? They didn't let me graduate. I mean, granted, I think if I had a little bit of ownership, I'd say maybe I didn't do the work. But what happened is— But you were right there where you should have been able to graduate. I did all the work. And by the way, it was a writing class. I had submitted all the work, and the teacher at the time—I wish I remember his name. I would love to call this person out. I don't remember his name, or I would mention it. I walked. I walked next to work done. They put work done in front of me in a weird way, and I think as a s*** move, because they knew how loud the applause would be for work done, and you didn't really hear my name after that. And I think they were afraid that I was going to do something. I don't know. I thought it was cool that I sat next to work done personally. I don't give a s***. And then I get home. I'm ready to move to New York, and I get a call from the school saying you, in fact, didn't graduate. You're not getting your diploma. You still are shy by six credits and I was like wait what and it was this creative writing teacher He had I was a creative writing major and he had two of my classes and he failed me in both of them I went up to the college I saw I walked into his closet of an office and I said hey I Bernie No I know who you are Rolling Stone guy and I was like yeah yeah I said well listen here the deal I must have failed two of your classes or whatever it is But I'm moving to New York. And so I'd love to make those classes up because obviously I'd love my diploma. And he did a thing where he talked to me like I was a idiot to me and almost convinced me that I was a idiot. And he was like, hey, what do you need a diploma for? You're famous now. I was like, yeah, I know. He was like, yeah, I heard you got a book deal. And I was like, well, I mean, we talked about it. But he goes, I heard Oliver Stone option the rest of your life. I was like, yeah, yeah. It's like some big things going on. He's like, you're going to be a stand up? He's like, you don't need a diploma. Yeah, you know what? I'll never give you a diploma. I will never give you the opportunity to make those classes. It makes me happy to fail you. I went, what? He goes, go yourself. You get a book deal? I'm a writer. I can't get a book deal and you get a book deal because you parted your balls off. You'll never, I will never pass you in my classes. Good luck. So like in a weird way, it almost tricked me. Like at the end, I was like, wait, he's being an asshole. I thought he was being my buddy. I walked out of the room and I was like, and then I was like, I moved to New York. I had to take correspondence classes, which are identical to the prison classes, where they send you a box of books, a box of books. And then they're like, write papers on these books. I never read a book in my life. but I got really bitter towards Florida state. And then I got on my first, I got my first development deal in Florida state reached out for money. And I was like, what? And I was like, they're like, Hey, who are your alumni? Like, I mean, my, my fraternity at one point disowned me and then they hit me up for money. And then I was like, I don't everyone. And it wasn't until this year that I went back to Florida state and all the shitty people were gone. And it was all new people, all really cool, new people. College has changed. and they reached out. First of all, I did the Civic Center. I didn't know I was doing the Civic Center. I saw Nirvana and Smashing Pumpkins play at the Civic Center. I saw Bobcat Goldthwait at this, Adam Sandler was at the Civic Center when I was on his college. I did the Civic Center and I had no clue I was doing the Civic Center I had no clue whatsoever And I walked in and I realized I doing an arena This is insane And it sold out And before the thing they like we want to give you a present I thought they were going to give me a doctorate. They gave me the spear that they throw in. That's like my one connection with that school. And when it happened, I bawled crying. They gave me that spear. And they said, we know how much the spear meant to you. We want you to have this. What about the spear still gets to you? My dad said when you go to Florida State, you're going to feel a sense of civic pride because that's a community. You're going to feel like you're a part of something. And I didn't get it. And I was 18 years old, a little buzzed, read a football game. I put a dip in, my head spinning. Chief Osceola comes out on Renegade. And I feel, what, 50,000 people explode. And he runs up and down the field and then rears back the spears on fire. and he spikes it in the head, the seminal head in the center, and the place pops. 18 years old, I start crying uncontrollably. I start sobbing, going like, I'm a part of something. This is what my dad was talking about. So that spear meant so much to me. And then that day at Tallahassee, I decided I wanted to have a moment. I wanted to see the place I first did stand up. I wanted to see my old houses. I wanted to go get some food, but I really wanted to walk the campus. I don't know if I was famous or not, but I was like, I was working, I was doing big things. I've been on Netflix a bunch and I started walking around that campus and people started sticking their heads out of their dorm rooms, just going, welcome home, birdie boy. It gets me emotional because it was like, cause I didn't feel like I was a part of it. I felt like I got separated from that community. And, but then the kids that went to school there, they were proud of me. They, I was one of them. And they knew it because we all felt it. And kids were getting in their car and they were driving and finding me. And they were like, Bert, Bert, can I get a picture? And like the cops pulled me over and they're like, Bertie boy. And I was like, and like only people that love me call me Bertie boy. And everyone was yelling out their windows, welcome home, Bertie boy. And then I, all of a sudden I was like, yeah, this is my home. This is where I spent six and a half years in this place But yeah man I fucking love that school I love being a part of it And it took a while for me to I guess to forgive myself I don't know. Forgive all that. But it was, you know, I love that school. It's the best f***ing experience. I have no regrets. So the Rolling Stone article, which was where you first kind of had your taste of fame, that was huge. Number one part of your number one party school. Yeah. A movie's made about it, National Lampoon's Van Wilder. Through all the stories I read on you, you've always made a point of saying you never watched it. Why has it been important to you to point that out, though? It was brought to my attention the day it came out, my agents called me. They're like, hey, you remember that thing you were developing back when we first met you? Well, it turned into a movie. They made the movie. Was it Barry Katz? Barry Katz was on the call. I'll only use his name because he gave me the best advice that I've ever gotten. Some of the best advice. They all wanted to sue National Lampoon. And Barry was like, listen, Papa, there's two types of people in this business. People who work and people who sue. Pick which one you want to be. And I was like, well, I'm already working. He's like, I think you made your answer. And so I didn't, I just kind of was like, whatever. First of all, I love Ryan Reynolds. I think he's awesome. Secondly, I had nothing to do with the movie. And once you make a movie, after I made my movie, I realized just how gross it is to ever try to attach yourself to the hard work of someone else. And I think the reason I never watched the movie is I never wanted to be able to answer questions about the movie. Because everyone's like, did you **** a bulldog? That's what they always ask me. I go, I did, but I didn't tell anyone about it. No, but like I never really, I don't have any connection. So I never wanted to like, I never tried to own it. I said I'll watch it. I'll watch it, but I want to watch it. Only with him? Only with Ryan Reynolds. Okay. I'll watch it with Ryan Reynolds. And that's this week's fan favorite. To see more popular videos, go to our YouTube channel at youtube.com slash Graham Bensinger.
