160 - The Past Times with Beth Stelling

Support for the dollop comes from Square. If you've ever tapped to pay and you think, wow, that was fast. That happened really fast. Probably Square. Square. Doesn't matter if you're selling lattes or cutting hair or detailing cars. Or cobbling or doing sort of a John Elway pass camp. A kissing booth. Our listeners right now, listeners of the dollop, can get $200 off Square hardware when you sign up at square.com slash go slash dollop. That's S-Q-U-A-R-E dot com slash go slash dollop. And you visit Square to get started. These are the kind of tools you need if you have a business. This is the kind of stuff you, we have both used Square in the past. I was on board with Square from the get-go. Our first tour, we used Square to sell merch. We've been Square, yeah, we've been with Square for ages. Square is a platform behind the scenes of so many businesses that you're already going to and enjoying. It doesn't matter what it is. It's point of sale. Square includes hardware that works in person and on the go, software for managing staff, marketing, and customer insights, and banking tools like Square checking to get paid instantly. It's fast, it's smart, it's transparent. It's built for how people run businesses. It makes everything super easy. If you're starting a business or running one that deserves better tools, Square helps you sell, manage, and grow without slowing down. And right now you can get up to $200 off Square hardware at square.com slash go slash dollop. That's S-Q-U-A-R-E dot com slash G-O slash dollop. Run your business smarter with Square. Get started today. The dollop will be on tour in March 2026. We are going to be in Buffalo on March 22nd. Then on the 23rd, we'll be in Syracuse. Then on March 24th, we'll be in Boston at the Wilbur. Then on the 25th, we'll be in Bridgeport. and 26th, the Gramercy Theater in New York. And then on the 27th, we'll be in Albany. And then on the 28th, we'll be in Pittsburgh. And then on the 29th, we'll be in Philadelphia. And then on the 30th, we'll be in Washington, D.C. at the Lincoln Theater. Why would you name it theater after Lincoln? Anyway, that's our March 2026 tour. Go to dolloppodcast.com slash tour for tickets. And welcome to the Pastimes. It's a podcast. All right. Someone's finally doing it. Hey, gang, you know what we do here. Each week we're going through a newspaper from a random date in history picked out by none other than Dave Anthony. I, Gareth Reynolds, have never seen it, and neither has this week's guest, the great Beth Stelling. Beth. Hello. It's always an honor to have you on things, and I'm not even being a jerk. We've been talking you up a lot. Your specials are now on YouTube. Your Netflix one. That's right. You have a sub stack. You're on tour, bethstelling.com. You're at punch-up tables for nothing. I'm there. What aren't you doing, Beth? Yeah, what aren't you doing? Having children and getting married. Good. Okay. Good call. That's fair. Is that by design? I mean, I guess. That's fine. I'm getting a second. Who could I pay to do that for me? Is it hard? Do you intimidate men because you're funnier than them? I feel like in my lifetime, I've dated comedians just because I refuse to be happy. And there are times where, you know, like, I don't know. There is a dynamic. There is a strange power dynamic with popularity or who you're with or that person. But I always tend to be with people who are like, I should be bigger. Right. And I'm over here like, I'm happy to have a job. So I date those types. Although I've also dated, I've also dated the type of comic that's like kind of almost maybe looked up to me, which I didn't prefer. Not my style. Sort of like dating a fan. That would be weird for me. Like there's certain comics. I'm sure there's women that do this. It's just not me. I don't want to just throw it all on men. But it's not that shocking that a male comic would marry or date a fan. Yeah, totally. No, I agree. And I think you're right. Men have been through enough. I'm kind of just bottom lining what you said. Totally agree with you. I would feel uncomfortable by that, like dating a fan. Yeah, sure. I've done it. It's fucking weird. I don't like it. It's definitely weird. The truth is they do know stuff about you, but it wasn't from you. No, that is – well, also with podcasting, they'll be like, is that when you were doing kids birthday parties? And I'm like, that's, this is not a conversation. Like this is fucking. You're not allowed to reference stuff that I didn't tell you directly. Hide it. You need to hide it. Fool me, babe. Um, well. Pretend you don't know I'm a grower, not a shower. Oh, here it comes. I know it's, I know it's going to get better. I heard you talk to Dave about it. No. Okay. So I'm just going to do some editor stuff. Obviously that's a lift. But, okay, Beth, so we're going to go through this newspaper. You get to guess what year it's from, having no context. I will do the same. You go first, and then I'll go. And the reason you go first is because Dave is mentally unwell. He's, it's this whole thing. I won't even get into it. But if you go first, it'll be helpful. Anywhere from like, anywhere from the 1600s up to today. Your mic had a little pop there when you said he. Just so you know, we heard the peep pop a little bit there So just something to be aware of That's what my That's what people call my dad, I guess And by people, I mean some of my sister's kids We call them peep Peep pop Okay, so I'm going first Grandpa and grandpa names is a real joy It really is It's true Hey, this is new new How can they get creative? Yeah My son just couldn't say This is knocky My son couldn't say knocky My son couldn't say grandma, so he just started calling her Mimi, and then that just lasted. Mimi's good. Poop, poop. I like Mimi. Let's go over to Nunu and Poop Poops. All right, Beth. Any year, it's old. That's what we know. The paper is old. Okay. Yeah. Hold on. Am I guessing? I'm guessing after I hear some stuff, right? Nope, you hear nothing. We're making you do it just totally cold. Right now? Correct. We're going to see what kind of telepathy skills you have. This is the spotlight you craved, Beth. This is what you wanted. Don't yell. Jesus Christ. 1993. Wow. 86, 87. Okay. Well, anywhere in there is fine. 1887, 1987. I'll say 1938. Are you looking at it? Does it have the date there? Beth wins because she did not try to cheat, and it is 1903. Okay, thank you. 19 what? What did I win, Dave? 1903. Uh, you get, uh, you get another guest spot. We're doing iPads. Yeah. You get another guest spot on the pastimes. You're going to get an iPads. In the future. You get to keep talking. You get to be on this show. You're allowed three more sentences, you ho. Now we don't, I don't, I used to choose these, but now our wonderful producer does. So I don't know them either, but he, he's been lately, he's been picking places or dates that have something to do with the guests. So the Dayton Evening Herald, Dayton, Ohio, Saturday, April 4th, 1903. Are you from there? Does that have anything to do with you? I'm from Dayton. Are you really? Oh, right. Of course. Yeah. So you're from Ohio, which is what the kids say, but she's actually from Ohio. Yeah, right. Licensed to wear male attire. Huh. 1903 this is from? That's right. Okay. In Paris and the French provinces, there are 10 women who are authorized by the prefect of police to wear full masculine costume. Yeah. That's how. That's nice. That's the right bureaucracy. Yeah. This is how it should be. We're going to go back to this where you have to. Do you have a license for pants? You should be an address, ma'am. Excuse me, ma'am. That hat is a problem. I actually do have my license in my pocket that I was afforded by these pants. Oh, here you are. Well, as you were. Good for you Among them were a lady artist A bearded woman A female house painter And decorator A mannish looking directress Jesus Christ Of a printing office That one's a little rough I mean They're still doing this in the news I know Yeah we killed her But she had blue hair And she looked ugly She was a problem And I heard she kisses girls She kissed his girls. She used to kiss a man. Then she punched God. And several others who have obtained certificates to show that they ought to discard the attire of their own sex for that of the stronger and sterner one. Jesus Christ. Well, no notes. That's brutal, obviously. I mean Actually with Alex Pretty They were doing I guess there was an image That was released that was like a little Doctored And then all the right was going Oh my god what is with you people It's like aren't you the ones who are showing Like Trump Like butt fucking money And just like in a Rocky outfit With like muscle Like what are you talking about You're the reason we have data centers Putting out stuff. Yeah. That's the shitting pilot video. Yeah. That was actually real, though. He's never so plain in his life. No, but the diarrhea was real, though. The diarrhea was real. You don't get to say anything about anybody's looks when you have fucking Gollum Stephen Miller in your corner. Okay. I'm going to draw a line. I think we leave him alone. Thank God he's in there. Thank God he's in there. Keeping everything a little bit on track. And his wife's podcast is phenomenal. I don't know if Katie listens to our show, but I would love to do it. I believe milk is medicine. She does. She's a big listener. A big listener. On the other hand, a humble potato merchant in the guy who sells potatoes, if you don't know what that is. Yeah. So we're just talking about a guy who sells potatoes. A humble one, too. I can't believe he doesn't have an ego. He makes a living just selling potatoes. I'm not selling potatoes. Well, not a big deal. This had a bunch of potatoes on it earlier. Now they're gone Now they're gone Where do you think they went? You don't have a table for six? I know it's 8pm on a Friday I'm a potato guy If you could just Next table would be nice A humble potato merchant in the suburbs Has been allowed to wear female garments For reasons which satisfy The prefecture of police So they had to throw in There's a potato guy Who likes to dress up like a lady So that's where we're at in France Well he's got He has potatoes At his Convenience series Stuff them down the front of your shirt He has sweater potatoes Just take a couple of potatoes I guarantee he was doing that If you have potatoes at your disposal What do you think? You're not putting them down the front of your shirt? Obviously I put one in the front And I put two on the breasts He was just looking at basket potatoes one day And he was like Well hold on here Now wait a minute This could It is oddly progressive and then you involve the cops and it becomes really strange for them to be like, well, you passed the dress test. And then what are you... Welcome aboard. What are you telling the prefecture of the... You're going in and going, so look, I would like to wear a dress. I've got my dress pitch tomorrow. Can I run you guys through it real quick? I deserve a dress. Let me have a dress. A frog dress. It's easier. I'm standing there for hours. I need the airflow. It would be way better. Yeah, you get a little airflow up your skirt. Oh, see, that sounds good. Even just hearing that now, that feels right for me. Scottish, the Scottish got it down. Yeah, but that's like wool. You look great in an A-line. Do you mean that? I don't even know what an A-line is. Do you think so? I don't know what an A-line is either. It's kind of in the name, really. You know, like. It's A-line. But I picture it sort of, you're sort of like pleated and flowy and flowers. Yes, love it. and the top is all part of the dress or no, this is just waistband? You can wear whatever you have right now on top. I love that too. That's what the Scottish have great. They're just like, yeah, you wear your regular thing and then you got an A dress. Then you put a big thing of pubes up front on the outside and it's a handbag. We used to have two guys that always came to, I don't know, was it dollops or was it walking the rooms? Oh yeah, we had kilt guys. Yeah, we had kilt guys. Always And they were like How are ya? Yeah They're big dudes too They were big guys Yeah Huge penises Huge Wonderful Don't they say There's no undies under there Don't they? No no You gotta let that stuff flow Absolutely That's part of the charm Yeah Aren't they sticking to stuff Like Oh yeah To the side of your leg It's like bat wings Absolutely Yeah I'd be more concerned About sitting down And having to stick to Like the vinyl on a chair Than I would my leg That's the reason Like even sitting in shorts Can be bad on a booth You're getting stuck to that. Well, that's why they say don't go to a movie in Scotland. Unless you want to get crabs. Yeah, unless you want an ass spunch. Did I say it right? Yeah, that's right. That's exactly right. Crabs. Crabs. Christ, crabs got me. Obviously, there's really nothing exciting happening in Dayton because the first three stories do not take place in Dayton. Which happens. Happens a lot. But your town so far is really boring. They're recording elsewhere. They're like, we don't have problems. Nothing. Nothing going on. They're like, nothing interesting. But in France, a guy wore a dress. Yeah. That's what they're up to over there. And that's why you shouldn't leave Dayton. You got to stay here. It's not safe to leave. No, that's right. Never get out. No. Are you living in Dayton now? No. You're in LA. I'm in Los Angeles. Beautiful. Beautiful Los Angeles. It's gorgeous. I don't know why he left. Well, that's evidence. For those of you just listening, Beth tilted the camera an inch to the left, showing a window that we couldn't see out of. I could show you. Yeah, you could. The idea that I'd be like, oh, you're on Coldwater. Dave, are we over here in 15? Dave, Dave. Dave's such a little perp. Okay, but here. So when I was doing, I did a podcast called The West Wing Thing, which we talked about the horrible politics of the West Wing and how it was like, it turns out super bad. and we did oh you mean on the show no me and another guy Josh Olson he wrote History of Violence we did a podcast and we went through every episode of the West Wing and we broke down its politics and why it turns out the politics are not that great pretty conservative but that led us into this thing about PragerU where we did a bunch of episodes about what PragerU was doing and then my co-host went into a PragerU video where they were taking a tour of the studio and he saw, they did one shot that was out a window and then he saw a little strip mall and then he saw the business and he was able to locate where PragerU is and they're totally freaked out that we know where it is. Wait, PragerUs are hidden? It's one building, it's in the valley and we went there and armed guards came. Wait, I'm so sorry. Am I an idiot? What's Prager U? It is a super right-wing thing. You're not an idiot. I wouldn't know about it unless I knew Dave. Well, they're trying to get- It's good to know thine enemy. It's essentially propaganda that they've started, that they started a while ago. It's those dumb videos you see, and you go, what the fuck? Like, they act like they're telling you history. It's like a Rush Limbaugh College, basically. Yeah, yeah, basically. It's just really bad. Which, by the way, I'm starting. They're putting it in schools now, of course. So it's like, you know, propaganda nonsense. So when we found them, they lost their fucking shit. But he did it through just seeing a window. So just to bottom line you think if we played that back Josh could figure out where she lives That what I saying Okay great I saying Beth we know where you are now Doesn matter Josh What are you just saying He like she at PragerU She was playing dumb Beth is at PragerU. He thinks everything's PragerU. I am in that neighborhood. Yeah, you are. Sometimes I go over there, just say hi. Hello. Through lime in people's eyes. Wow. Which kind of lime, though? Fucking hopefully the citrus Yeah because the other one would probably blind you right That's bad Yeah have you ever done that Yeah yeah I've done both limes I'm a big lime guy Sometimes I'll put lime in one eye And the other lime in the other eye Just to see Yeah it's like a Sprite Yeah You ever been on a lime scooter I have been on a lime scooter yeah Tell her about you Dave one time tried Dave decided to ride the scooter as far as it would go And he was like I was 10 minutes away from home It was like he went on it for like 40 minutes Cruising with a buzz I live up in the hills above Glendale And I wanted to see how far it would go after a show So I like night time Also buzzed for sure Midnight text to be like that thing went far You are 49 my guy You alright But you're supposed to leave it in a zone I was out of the zone Did you get in trouble I don't know I don't think I did I will say that the annoying part Is like they won't let you leave it in certain zones Which is irritating What do they do? They find them? They beep, right? Or they just don't let you end the Well, this was before they were doing that Before they realized that people were throwing them in the ocean Maybe it's been a while since I got on one I did ride one through Italy Which felt dangerous Yeah, that is dangerous Yes, it is Yeah And my friend was on the back of it That's very dangerous Now that is dangerous Now it's not funny anymore, Beth Now it's not Now we think you're irresponsible The comedy part of the story is over That's just fucking nuts This has turned into like a Rogan episode, just terrible ideas. But the first time I rode one, I was late to an audition, and I felt so free. That's such a great – everything about that is great. Like late for an – yeah, roll into an audition on a fucking scooter. Excuse me, I'm late for acting. Move! It was also like a Leviton thing, so it's like I knew I already didn't have it. You just ride the scooter into the room? How are you? I have bugs all over my face. Where do you guys put your scooters? I love to blame my hair on the scooter ride, but it always looks like this. You know, I had a shirt that I really liked when I used to go for commercial auditions that I spilled coffee on. and so I still wanted to wear it so every time I'd go into the audition room I'd go, I just spilled coffee on this, apologies so I could keep wearing it and I told my friend and this was a pretty good acting exercise really it was a good warm up at the end you reveal this has actually been on here forever as the door is shutting and by the way, that coffee is from a year ago see you guys later either way good luck. One time I had to do a callback on zoom and as I was, they're like, thank you so much. And, and I kind of slowly was, before I pressed end, it felt very like slow motion. And I heard one of them go, well, that wasn't. I mean, it could have gone in an okay way. I doubt it too. I doubt it. You don't want to hear that. You don't want to hear like, But it's just one of those things where this is why people who only act, like I understand why they go crazy or crazy. Yeah. Because it's like, it is maddening. Like I'm a pretty normal person that would read something and go, yeah, I mean, I can get a gist. So when someone is like, well, that wasn't what we expect. You're like, what did you expect? Yeah. What'd you want? Where was I supposed to go with that? Have you thought about writing better? I think that. Isn't it interesting? Like, tell me what, like, instead of being like, hey, go bake us something and then you come in with something oh we're allergic to raisins it's like well tell me that i guess that's what a breakdown's for but no i completely agree because if you actually think about what the project it's going to be someone telling you what they want you to do not just like well you just uh you didn't do it right so this movie's gonna be pretty bad because you're rarely giving notes yeah the best the best is when they do because i used to do i I used to improv a lot during the auditions, and then they don't use you, but they hire someone, and then they take the stuff you improv to me, and have that person do it. Well, that's just fun. That's a part of me a few times. But the best was the mustache when I went into audition for a show, and I had a big handlebar mustache. And then they didn't hire me, but the guy they hired, they had him grow on. And then I ran into the showrunner, and I was like, dude, that was fucked. I actually don't think you're allowed to be like, I chose the facial hair for the character. But we knew that's what would happen because we knew guys who wrote on the show. I'm actually with the studio on this. Through lime in pupils' eyes at the trial of Jasper Abel, a schoolteacher charged with throwing lime into the eyes of little Emerald Norman. So it is lime lime. I think it is. Holy shit. He peeped through a door. It developed that the teacher did not know that lime was injurious to the eye. Well, doesn't it like you put lime on like bodies to make them. I was just going to say, I think it's blinding. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, what did she think? What did he or she think? Jasper, what did he think lime was for? I'll tell you what, that kid didn't fuck with him anymore. Judge Ellie gave the defendant a lecture and fined him $25. Well, what happened to the kid? Yeah, it's not good. I'm telling you. I can't imagine. It says it's a caustic, highly infusible solid that consists of calcium oxide, often together with magnesium oxide. It's definitely going to fuck with your eyes. What happens if it? Scarring of the cornea, eye redness, eye pain, blurred vision, watery eyes. Gareth? What? Are you reading AI? No. I'm not. I'm over here at Merrin-Webster. Yeah. Same thing. I'm reading IA. Which is what I do now. It's far better. I'm an environmental guy. So I think for the audience, I think we should just say that he was blinded. Sure. Yeah. And the guy got a $25 fine. And then someone wrote a song and it was blinded by the lime. Okay. Now I know that that was not a good joke. We all know. And the teacher was like, do you know how little I get paid? I had to pay for this lime myself. I got to bring in my own lime to blind my students. nothing new in it. A Missouri judge has gone to the trouble of deciding that a woman has a right to hold her skirts out of the mud. What the fuck? France is light years ahead of us. Missouri. I know. What are you saying? That in other countries, there's like cops being like, you can wear pants, ma'am. And then here we're like, you are allowed to not get your dress muddy. We're clicking two stones together. You may think we're using stepping in mud as an excuse to flash our calf. Yeah, that's right. I just needed to get a little credit for this calf. You're making men horny. There's mud. Gosh, mud's everywhere today. Is it so wrong to feel sexy over mud? Look at all this mud. Good Lord, think of the men. The women themselves had decided the question long before Missouri judges ever heard of it. Wait, what? They're saying that women were already doing that. They were like, oh, thanks for allowing me to lift my skirt. I've been doing it. Yeah. It's now legal. Some guy just got mad at it and took it to court. Right. Someone must have fined a lady, right? That's probably what happened. Yeah. If you don't like it, get rid of the mud. Thank you. Isn't that your job as a man? Yeah, man. Wow. Get rid of the mud. Get rid of all the mud. You don't want me lifting my skirt. This is another story in Indiana. There's no Dayton anything. There's nothing on Dayton? What if I like a muddy skirt? Oh, Christ, those guys. We should be mudding the women. I'm going to do a quick note to the editor again. So cut out the last 20 minutes. I apologize. You guys had some good stuff, but I don't think it's going to be able to live. I'm sorry. I have a hard out in two minutes. I also have a hard out. That's fair. Hard out's a great one. In the audition I have a hard out of four minutes I noticed that you guys were running behind And I do have a hard out Oh, the hard out So listen good Listen good Gareth Dave Do you know what's better than flowers that die in just three days? Matching underwear I'm talking about me undies Me undies Figured out Valentine's Day gifts better than anybody else with their matching underwear for couples. It's very cute. You and I actually do have matching underwear now. Yeah, we got the dinosaur ones. No, I have flowers and hearts. The Stegosaurus and the Ternosaurus Rex. No, okay, I guess we don't have matching ones, but... I'm going to get yours and put them on and wear them, and then I'll give them back to you. MeUndies makes matching underwear specifically for couples like Gareth and I, same adoring little prints, different cuts for each of you i'm a little prince and they're all made from their signature ultra model fabric that feels incredibly great they are amazing boxer shorts they are super soft good stretch good comfort particularly when i put garrison after he's worn them or the same time you and i've been walking around in the same pair a little bit uh over 300 million pairs sold 90 50,000 five-star reviews. People love them because they feel amazing. Yes. And they look great. Yes. And they got a first pair promise. 45 days risk-free. If your first pair doesn't work out, they'll make it right. No hassle at all. Yes. Are we going to upload pictures of us in our MeUndies? Probably not. Probably not. Probably not. I thought we were doing that. I thought we agreed. No, they can go to the website. They're great, but you don't need to see us in them. And I think, Gareth, you're selling used ones? No. No, no, no. Just have a couple pairs that I'm very happy with, and I'll be keeping them. I actually have more than a couple of pairs. I have other pairs, but I have two new pairs, and I'll just be keeping those mine. They're all going to be mine. Just regular underwear stuff. Completely. It wouldn't even be worth you mentioning anything, which you did and you shouldn't have. I'll send you pics. I don't want any. Make this Valentine Day one to remember with matching underwear from MeUndies. To get exclusive deals up to 50% off, go to MeUndies.com slash dollop and enter promo code dollop. That's MeUndies.com slash dollop. Promo code dollop for up to 50% off. I'm wearing them. They're soft. Gareth. Support for the dollop comes from Square. If you've ever, like, tapped, you know, you tap to pay, and you think, wow, that was really, that was fast. That happened really fast. Probably Square. Square. Doesn't matter if you're selling lattes or cutting hair or detailing cars. Or cobbling or doing a sort of a John Elway pass camp. A kissing booth. Our listeners right now, listeners of The Dollop, can get $200 off Square hardware when you sign up at square.com slash go slash dollop. That's S-Q-U-A-R-E dot com slash go slash dollop. And you visit Square to get started. These are the kind of tools you need if you have a business. This is the kind of stuff you, we have both used Square in the past. I was on board with Square from the get-go. Our first tour, we used Square to sell merch. Yeah, we've been with Square for ages. Square is a platform behind the scenes of so many businesses that you're already going to and enjoying. It doesn't matter what it is. It's point of sale. Square includes hardware that works in person and on-the-go, software for managing staff, marketing, and customer insights. And banking tools like Square are checking to get paid instantly. It's fast. It's smart. It's transparent. It's built for how people run businesses. It makes everything super easy. If you're starting a business or running one that deserves better tools, Square helps you sell, manage, and grow without slowing down. Right now, you can get up to $200 off Square hardware at square.com. That's S-Q-U-A-R-E.com. Run your business smarter with Square. Get started today. Touch them. Hindu sleeper rudely awakened by robbers. This is out of Indiana H.V. Seldonburg Who styles himself the Hindu sleeper Okay, I don't know what's happening right now Wow I have no idea what's happening I don't think you're allowed to say this stuff I agree You can't call yourself a Hindu sleeper If your name is Seldonburg I think Beth is right I don't think continuing to say Hindu sleeper Is the right move Well, that's what he is He's the Hindu sleeper Please stop saying it What does it mean, Dave? I hope they tell us, but I bet they won't. Had the most trying experience Wednesday night at J.P. Berger's Casino on the south side in the Glassworks District. Jesus Christ, okay. Late Saturday night, Sledenberg, now his name has changed. Now it's Sledenberg, started on a seven days sleep or hypnotic expedition. Okay, so he's sleeping a long time. Sure. A hypnotic exhibition or seven days sleep. This is depression. He's pretending to sleep. This is also classified. This used to be called Hindu sleeping, but now we know it as depression. And now I will sleep for seven days. It's like David Blaine's out of ideas. Guys, this is crazy. Okay, go ahead. He's watching a movie. Right here. He's sick. Welcome to the casino. What an attraction that is when people come from all over. He's gone for 15 days. Thursday morning at an early hour, he was rudely awakened and roughly handled by burglars. The rough, what's happening? It's a weird tactic for a burglar to be like, wake him up. I like a gentle burgle. Yeah. I like to wake up and be like, my stuff. Instead, they're like, we're robbing you. Hey. But he's at a casino doing this. So I assume it's like a show thing. A show called sleeping Boy he's really out Entertainment was really bad back then Boy he's really sleeping The rough box in which he was sleeping Was all at once stood on end And hurled across the room What the fuck While Sledenberg I actually do love this A guy sleeping at the show Is we're gonna toss him around and see if we rouse him But he's called burgled Yeah, the burgled part is really throwing me off Unless people put coins in the box To reward him for such a good sleep That could be happening Hey, good job Bring it back I'm barely buying this This guy's really out How do you push that quarter in? Well, Slettenberg says some of the rowdies struck him with pins Oh, probably like bowling pins over like needles Or pokey pins It could be a pokey pin Pokey pin But struck, I think, yeah Yeah, you might be right. Striking someone with a pin is insane. You like that? There's more where that came from. I actually don't. Yeah. He's still sleeping now? Yeah. Wakey, wakey. Later he heard someone in the room robbing the cash register and called. What the fuck is this setup? I live in a grocery store. Why is there a cash register? Come on. I don't know. What do you do? It's a sleeping guy in a box and then there's a room with a cash register that he's in? Yeah. What are you buying? I'm buying this tale. So far, I've heard no red flags. I'm like... Sounds normal. Wait, where are we again? Missouri? It's in a casino in Hartford City, Indiana. This is very normal Okay Yeah As someone who studies history this is regular Have you ever heard of Hartford City Indiana Never Me neither. My numbers have been dipping there. We have two and a half stand-ups here, and we would think that one of us would know. Well, now we're all figuring out who the half is, because we know it's not that. And knowing you, I think it's not you. Should I look up Hartford City? I mean, it'll be the first time it's been Googled. Hartford City, Indiana. It's real. It is real. Known for the sleeping Hindu. Northeast central part of the state. That's well stated. That's everywhere. That's where the best of them. It's actually the state. So, yeah. I mean, there's nothing really there, right? No, that's why this guy could pull off such a good sleep. He, okay, later he heard someone in the room robbing the cash register, and he called lustily for help, but no one came. Oh, please. Someone come up. Hey, someone help me. I've been robbed and I masturbate. Can you send up the boy? What does that say? It's a peaceful place to live. Oh, it's peaceful. Oh, it's peaceful. That's why he was fucking crashing, bro. Yeah, it's a good place to sleep, yeah. I like that he sleeps like Curly. he got on his hand hands and knees by the way i just read it something about the three stooges because i was considering doing one of them for a episode and they they kept going until they're really old oh yeah i've seen they really couldn't do the stuff anymore because they were so slow i've seen an old interview with them like way after curly's dead and he's like mo is just like well no i think the characters the whole point of the boys was to really find themselves and create a bot, you were just like, you're poking each other's eyes. He's like, at the heart, it was a story about brotherhood. It's like shocking. You guys were the first jackass. Yeah, honestly. Yeah, they really were. Yeah, yeah. He then telephoned to get the proprietor, but could not get him and sat on his coffin until morning when the bartender arrived. So this is, now it's like turned into like a vampire. An emergency bartender. Yeah. Why are you sleeping in a coffin. You're just sleeping. Is there an emergency? I'm the bartender. The thieves secured $12. Slunberg declares that he will never take on another spell in a saloon. Oh, he was doing this all in a saloon. Okay, now it makes sense. Yeah, that would have been really helpful up top. This is just like us saying, you know, I'm not doing another bar show. If it was an ambush and they didn't know that I was doing a show. They're trying to watch the game. That vibe. Do you want to hear the worst story ever? New York. Whoa. Nobody said yeah. He didn't give us time to hint. Yeah, do you want to hear it? New York. Christ. No. So I've been there for like a year, and I took a gig in a bar. And I get there, and there's no stage. He's just like, yeah, I'm just going to stand up in one of the booths. No. And the Rangers are in the playoffs. And the playoff game is on. This is not a show And he turns off all the TVs Halfway through the second quarter of a Rangers game In New York And tells me to stand up On a booth How bad is forced comedy, huh? You guys hate that? I got one worse One time I show up for a bar show And the guy goes, okay, the show is behind the bar So I go there and he goes And all your jokes have to be making drinks And I go, I think you just Are forcing me to be a bartender That's like a prank. That's a comedian that was a bartender working as a chef, and he was like, you got a cover for me. Yeah. Comments are desperate enough to do it. He wasn't wrong. Oh, yeah. And everyone got gin and tonics that night. Of course. I would gladly. I'd still do it. Yes, and. Reunion hereafter may be disappointing. Rabbi Hirsch advises his hearers not to be too sanguine about the resurrection What is, what? Oh, wait, the reunion? The reunion, I guess that makes sense now, reunion Yeah, okay What? This is out of Chicago So again, no Dayton stories Beth, nobody cares about Dayton, in Dayton I think it's good though No news is good news, man Yeah, there's nothing to report until Beth got involved. Beth put Dayton on the map. If the life to come is to be a continuation of the life here, there is a possibility that a reunion there will be a disenchantment. With these words, Dr. Emil G. Hirsch, in a lecture at Temple Israel last night, is considered by some to have cast a shadow of question on the resurrection as generally believed by Christians. Emile Hirsch from Into the Wild? That's right. Same guy. He's been doing stuff for a while. Been around forever. He's been crushing. Yeah. So the rabbi is downplaying the Christian reunion story? It sounds like it, yeah. So he's talking some shit. He's talking smack. Okay. I get that. But what do we mean reunion? When Jesus comes. When you get, I think when you die, then you go up and you get to see Jesus. And he's like, hey, man. He's like, oh, have you not heard? He's a huge dick. Yeah. You get up there and Jesus is like, you guys fucked me. He's a cloud diva. You guys fucked me. Jesus, it's great to be here. Yeah, I'm kind of in the middle of something. Christ. Anyway, what were you saying? I'm going to send you back. I don't look anything like those photos. Can you tell them? Honestly. Those paintings. Not me. Good Lord. You guys are really overdoing the cross stuff. Jesus, I'm a huge fan. Please, sir, I'm actually talking to a friend right now. And John wasn't really that involved, if you want to go back and spend that. No, he was not. No. He was off doing his own shit. Yeah. It's always John. Always John. In all religious and in all churches, said Hirsch, there is some idea of a resurrection after death. In most of them, the idea is too material. On the death of a near relative or of a friend, we are expected to find comfort in the belief that sometime after we are dead, we are to be reunited. I agree with this guy. We were setting up way too much stuff for the after. To place implicit confidence in that belief is wrong. I agree. I think we overdo it. We're always like, then you get to go back and take another picture at Sears in heaven together. This is an op-ed, is it not? This is an op-ed. This is an op-ed. And it's a bit about the afterlife. I do love arguing. You fools. That is not what happens when you die. Here's the answer. I have it. People who are reunited after a long separation frequently find that the reunion is not all they expect it to be. Who is he talking to? Having talked to many ghosts. But the whole, so he's Jewish. So he's like undermining. And you're like, look, you guys are all thinking you're going to go to heaven and have this sweet ride. But it's not that great. Yate. Yeah. Yeah, it's not happening. Yeah, it's the tough talk. You'd be like, why did I show up to Temple tonight? It's really a lot of bullshit. No cars on Saturdays. All right? Do not pin your faith to a vague hope of a meeting hereafter, which may disappoint you. That is hugely disappointing if you're showing up to temple or church for like 30 years. But the other thing is, nobody knows, bro. It's just some guys. It's really, it's an op-ed. It's just one guy saying a thing. So you do think we reunite? Because I do like that. I think when we die, there's no heaven, but we go into Jesus. That's a really bad answer. Obviously, everyone's in trouble. He absorbs us into his body. Beth, what do you think? What do you think happens after you die? Well, I think you do get to take a picture with God. Interesting. And they send that to Facebook. Is it a selfie? Heaven's Facebook. It's interesting. Yep. You get a little photo op. Everybody knows you made it. Save. Okay. That makes sense. And depending on how many likes you get is how many, how many likes you get while you're there. This is, you could genuinely create this religion. There is definitely a market for what you're doing right now. Yeah, this could easily be done. Uploaded from heaven. 100 likes. You're doing pretty comfy up in heaven. You're going to get a couple extra pillows. Turned out service. You take that to Silicon Valley, and they would give you millions of dollars right now. Unfortunately, you've got 12 likes, so we're going to have to put you to hell. Yeah, sorry. You're down. It's unfortunate. Married widow and her three daughters. Married widow. Question arises. It's a strange way of saying widow. Married widow. Wait, say. Redundant. Married widow is redundant, yeah. Married widow and her three daughters. Okay. No, but are they not just saying, like, this woman. Well, widow carries the marriage part. Now she has a second. Unless she's a widow who got married again. Oh, sorry. Yes, right. If she's a remarried widow. It sounds like you're bouncing over a fancy robot. Are you technically a widow at that point? Internet. Okay, there we are. Okay. But are you technically, once you get married, are you no longer a widow? Does it clean the slate? I think to me they're basically saying it's just another fun way to shame a woman because I feel like it's remarried. But maybe I'm wrong. Yeah. If it's that, then I'm okay. Then I'll back off. It's basically saying like, hey, just so you know, she lost the first one. He's gone. But she's married now to the second guy. All right. Because don't they like it when you're not divorced and you just kept one of them alive forever? Yeah. Why did your last relationship end? If it's a widow, it's not her fault. But if it's a divorce, then it's her fault. It is her fault. She's problematic. She is problematic. And that's holding true still. That's why I never got married. Yep. And that's why I killed my wife. Go ahead. Information is reached here of the marriage of... This is out of Tennessee. Information is reached here of the marriage of John Newberry and Miss Patty Barron. Newberry lives about 10 miles. She had kids? Yeah. Interesting. She's an oxymoron. She's a married widow. She's barren with children. Three kids. She's barren. Newberry lives about 10 miles from Tallahoma. Tullahoma. Tullahoma. There would be nothing unusual in the marriage If it was not for the previous Matrimonial ventures Of Newberry That's John Or is that her No she's Barron About 35 years ago He married The widow Sally He's got a type He's a widow guy Who was then the mother of three daughters Judy, Martha and Patsy Is this a story about my stepdad? four years after the marriage, four years after the marriage, his wife died, leaving one child, a son by Newberry. After waiting about a year, he married Judy. I don't care. Oldest daughter of his deceased wife. Now this just got, oh boy. We just Woody Allen without, without the dying part. He's the director. Oh boy. That's so fucking weird. Jesus Christ. Well, I watched you grow up. It is so bad. It is so bad. On this podcast, we have a longstanding lack of understanding of how you can watch a girl grow up and then want to have sex. And yet we have Chris D'Elia on regular. It's weird. It's weird the way we've... I don't know. I guess it's the charm. I'm okay with him doing it. Everyone else, it's weird. My favorite comedians are greasy-looking pedophiles. What's that say about you Dave? No it's just that I'm a classic Guy Dave is a type Austin does We do good comedy in Austin I don't know what everyone's fucking talking about After waiting About one year he married Judy The oldest daughter of his deceased wife In two years Judy followed her Mother to the grave leaving a baby girl Oh god you better I swear I'm gonna punch you if this goes If he fucks that baby. If he fucks that baby, I'm going to beat you, Dave. Do you understand me? If he fucks you, he better leave her alone. Again, awaiting a reasonable time to mourn, Newberry took unto himself Martha to wife. Martha is Judy's sister, so he married the second daughter of his wife, Sally. Right, he's just fucking, yeah, he's hitting the cycle. Go out in town. Wait a minute. There are other women in town? Oh! Oh! Does he leave the house at all? No. Doesn't sound like it. Doesn't sound like it. Well, your sister's dead. Should we do it? Seems like there's no other option that we should be married. Or I marry the baby. As we do, we're going to make love on this casket. There we are. Family traditions. Well. Oh, no. What? What? It's a fine thing to say. Nobody should be upset. Expensibly bad. That's a quick lift. I'm running for city council, so I'm going to need you to lift a few things out of the episode, to be quite honest with you. The thing has to go And then you hear it God damn it dude What? I told you I put an echo on it I'm gonna have all the wrong people voting for me Jesus Christ Okay so he took himself Martha to wife Who after living a number of years Followed her sister and mother to the grave He's killing these women So the marriage last week No Of Newberry and Patsy Absorbs the whole family Which one was Patsy? The baby? No Patsy was the third sister Oh fuck He married all the sisters. Jesus Christ. He married all the fucking sisters. It's like cloning your dog. That is insane. I don't like this. I don't either. It's crazy. I can't believe the third one was like, for sure. I mean, that is, everyone's mentally ill. Well, she, Gareth, you know she didn't have a choice. But, you know. Excuse me. He's like, will you marry me? Men have been quite fair. I was joking about the first two. You're the one I always wanted. Well, now that I work my way through the vegetables, time for the dish. It's time for the death, Dick Whoever it touches will perish All right What if he just has chlamydia And it can't happen That is a great mystery And then I realized You have chlamydia It was me who was the problem Oh my god, I'm the one Oh, that's crazy Boy, that actually makes a lot of sense Okay, my bad That makes a lot of sense. You know what? I'm going to, I'll be honest. I have some blame in this. I guess I do. Oh my God, baby. You're 16 now? Oh God. Now the question arises, what kin to one another are the offspring of the four marriages? What? Well, they're like. Oh, what is the, yeah, what are they? Yeah, what are they? Well, they're all cousins or. Or, uh. Exactly. Yeah, they're cousins. And brothers and sisters. And daughters. They're cousins and brothers and sisters. Okay. Sure. As God wanted. I mean, Beth's leaving the podcast. Beth took off Sorry some dogs are pretty we going pretty crazy around here Uh Oh it fine Oh now we know where you are It fine know where you are it fine it just ice beth no big deal josh figured out where you live now support for the dollop comes from square if you've ever like tapped you know you tap to pay and you think wow that was really that was fast that happened really fast probably square square doesn't matter if you're selling lattes or cutting hair or detailing cars or cobbling or doing a sort of a John Elway pass camp. A kissing booth. Our listeners right now, listeners of the Dollop, can get $200 off Square hardware when you sign up at square.com slash go slash dollop. That's S-Q-U-A-R-E dot com slash go slash dollop. And you visit Square to get started. These are the kind of tools you need if you have a business. This is the kind of stuff you, we have both used Square in the past. I was on board with Square from the get-go. Our first tour, we used Square to sell merch. Yeah, we've been with Square for ages. Square is a platform behind the scenes of so many businesses that you're already going to and enjoying. It doesn't matter what it is. It's point of sale. Square includes hardware that works in person and on-the-go, software for managing staff, marketing, and customer insights, and banking tools like Square checking to get paid instantly. It's fast. It's smart. It's transparent. It's built for how people run businesses. It makes everything super easy. If you're starting a business or running one that deserves better tools, Square helps you sell, manage, and grow without slowing down. And right now, you can get up to $200 off Square hardware at square.com slash go slash dollop. That's S-Q-U-A-R-E dot com slash G-O slash dollop. Run your business smarter with Square. Get started today. President, congratulates parents of triplets. Oh. The president? Yes. It's a big deal. It's a big deal back then. We have a lot more triplets now. The guy from the previous story was like, are they sisters? Send them my way. They keep dying, but they're staying the same age. I have a killer dick. I think that there were more triplets back, less triplets back then because of the whole living thing. Right. Living through. Right. They'd die. Yeah, they would die. Sends three photographs of himself as presents for the three Cunningham masters. That is such a Trump move. Congratulations on your wonderful womb. Here's three pictures. Here's three pictures of me. This is out of New Jersey. George Cunningham of this city who recently became the father of triplets, all boys yesterday received a letter from President Roosevelt congratulating him. The letter reads, Mr. George Cunningham, my dear sir, I congratulate you and Mrs. Cunningham. Oh, that was nice. That was so nice to congratulate her. Throw her name in there also. That was really. And your vessel. A huge bully to you and all your work. And that thing that held it. And the egg holder. Congrats to you and the womb that you own. There we are. that is the kind of American citizenship in which I believe I send you three photographs of myself for the three new Cunningham boys and my compliments to Mrs. Cunningham. With best wishes, Theodore Roosevelt. Wow. That is. So just did he sign it? Was that a thing? He must have. He must have signed the pictures. I don't know. It is interesting to wonder when. I don't know if it was a thing. That is a very interesting question. Interesting question. Pictures are rare back then. Yeah, but signing it, the signature. Right. When did that start? I bet that they were doing it then, don't you think? I think they were glossy. Or you just send a letter. It's just him and the quads. Here's four different looks. I could be a doctor, a tennis player, the president. I'm betting AI gives this a total nonsense answer, so let's check it out. Well, I know in Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade, Hitler signs his autograph book. So we know it was around in World War II. Is that true? He sends like a proof sheet. He's like, circle which one you want. Which one? Which look is best? I'm in the Westerns. Around the 1930s. 1930s. So there was no autographs back then. That had to be a weird first. That's a weird first. Maybe back then it was like stealing your soul. I can't show you my autograph. It's a weird thing to be like, will you sign here? Someone asked me, can you sign this ticket? And I signed it how I signed my credit cards. And I was like, oh, shit. I never thought of that. I have to go back. Because my full name versus my name. Do you have two different signatures? Yeah. Interesting. Oh, smart. That's actually very smart of you. Now I feel dumb. Yeah. You don't want to be giving out your signature. You know, what's funny is you did it once and are like huge faux pas. So that's interesting. And now everybody knows, so that's even better. So Preston, it's Gareth again from the pastimes. You're going to really need your lifting fingers for this episode, McKay. Somebody goes back and steals your identity. I'm ruined. Thankfully Okay so it started Only ordered a Dyson vacuum Yeah Pretty expensive though It did start here in the In LA In the 20s When with the rise of film and baseball That makes sense But in apparently Barely In China It was very common for emperors to do it Interesting And other Big folks Okay Back to school McCoy again seeks legal separation. The kid has sued wife's alleged lover for $100,000 in damages. What? 1903? Yeah. It doesn't feel of the time. Okay, so the wife has a side piece and he's suing the side piece. Oh, Kid McCoy is the guy's actual name. Oh, thank you. That threw me off. Okay. Okay, there we go. Yeah, he's a boxer. This is from New York. He probably is. Look him up. Kid McCoy and his wife, who has divorced him twice and married him three times during the last six years. So they're still married. Yes. Both shrink from the publicity of a trial in their third effort for separation. And Justice Gildersleeve today- Gildersleeve's a great judge, by the way. That guy is phenomenal. Gildersleeve. today appointed Alexander Lament referee to take testimony and report to him. This is normal law. I guess you guys might not be understanding, but I'm a legal mind. You want a referee. Yeah. Fair and unbiased. Fair, unbiased. Yeah, ref. Get a ref. Ref lament. Wearing the whole outfit. There's a whole thing. He's got flags, a whistle. It's a whole thing. Yeah, that's what you want in court. To take testimony and report to him whether the kid is entitled to absolute divorce. I'd like to point out, referee spelled wrong, testimony spelled wrong. It's not a good article. No, that's fine, though. The kid charges that while he was in Europe last July, his traveling companion, Ralph Thompson, son of a Schenectady banker. We don't need that part. And grandson of the founder of a great locomotive works, gave him the slip, came back to New York and visited his wife, who afterward went abroad with a party of which Thompson was a member. Oh. So she's fucking around with another dude. With his European companion. But if you've gotten divorced twice and married three times to the same person, it's not going to work. No. We live this. It only worked for Tom and Roseanne. That's right. That was it. The best. By the way, she's really coming around stand-up-wise. It's really getting good again. She's good. She found herself. Miss Selby. I do a lot of stand-up at TPUSA, and that is a hot crowd. That is the best room. That is the best room. Honestly, I sell so much merch there. Oh, yeah. It's a hot room. 200K in merch. Yeah, I sell my autograph. You sell so much work. I do the rubber neck thing. Miss Shelby enters a general denial through Thomas Osborne, but her husband has also sued Ralph Thompson for 100,000 damage for taking away. Oh, yeah. So this is when you could. You sue the lover. I like that. Actually, someone is doing that right now. There's like three states left that you can sue the other one. I like that. I'm pro that. Yeah, this is very common to sue the adulterer. You fucked my wife? I want all your money. Yeah, why not? Yeah. You're supposed to pay me for that. Yeah. Your honor, this man fucked my wife. And you didn't pay me. And I'd like some money for it. Is that crazy? That's not crazy. That's a really good case. That was yours to use. I'm Justice Gilded Sleeve. Is that his name? You can trust me. It's Gildersleeve. I'm Gildersleeve. You're wrong. Gildersleeve is when you don't have a tissue and you wipe your snot on your arm. You've got what's called a Gildersleeve. Woman drugged and her hair clipped. No. Oh, boy. Subject was a Barbie. That's a good idea for a doll She drugged in her haircut This is out of Pennsylvania What did they take? As she was seated in her home Nursing her eight months old baby Miss William Stevens Mid nurse Of Dunbar was overpowered and chloroformed by two men Jesus Christ This is So chloroform's real They sucked her dry And the baby hasn't woken up either because it's drinking the milk. Wouldn't that be amazing? They drug her, suck on her milk, drug themselves by accident. She wakes up first, sees these guys with milk around their mouths. They really had a time. All right, Todd, take the left hand. I'll go right. Dried milk. Crust. Oh, my God. Her hair, which was exceptionally long and black, was clipped to the scalp. Oh, shit. So this is a wig theft. Sure. They're taking the hair from the wigs. I don't know if that is the actual legal term. It is. There's a whole wig theft statute. It's a wig lift. Okay. The men were seeing fleeing from the house by neighbors who made an investigation, because they saw these guys running with hair. Yeah. It's never good. They got her in his arms. And found the mother and baby unconscious. What, they chloroform the baby? Just give a little bit to the kid. The milk would go. You think it would go? I don't know if it's that fast. I don't know how chloroform works. And by the way, I just am saying that as an ally. I don't know how chloroform works. I'm on the right side of history. I wouldn't know what to do. Do you need a rag? I've never looked it up. I've never done it once. Never done it. I've never done it. Classic woke. Yeah. The assailants are believed to be peddlers who will dispose of the hair. As no other articles in the house were disturbed, the police conclude that the sole object of the raid was to steal Ms. Stevens' luxuriant locks. Wow. I mean, this is bizarre. I guess I never heard stuff about this. I guess there's a good wig market, I guess. We got a couple minutes left, so we'll do this last one, and this one goes out. Then we'll do thanks, and then we do the song. This one goes out to Gareth. This is special, Gareth. It's about eggs? Babe smothered by cat. Oh, shit. That is how I want to go. Baby by fat cat? Yeah. Babies kill cats. There was an article today that said they did research, and cats think they're training you. Yeah. It's an important part of the dynamic. Two equals. That is real. The cats do think they're training you. They think they're training people, not the other way around. And they don't meow unless they hear you talk. Anyway. The 10-month-old child of J.H. Whitman, a farmer. And we should point out, this baby would already be dead if it were to have not had this done. Go ahead. Was killed last night by the family cat. Yeah, this is 1903, though. This is so the cat. The family thinks the cat sucked the breath out of the baby. That's a little far. The doctor says the cat simply lay on the child and smothered. No, the cat definitely sucked air out of the cat. I told you, cats are baby killers. We've been talking about this forever on this podcast Cats will eventually exterminate the human race Good night everybody If I could see a cat suck the air out of a baby I would say that it's worth taking the life I would pay for that That would be a good Broadway show And then they bring him right back to life Yeah They make the biscuits He's breathing again Oh my god it's a miracle The cat did it The cat did do it And then you brought him back Beth we took a journey through history We did 1903 Any lessons learned on this one? I don't think so, right? Yeah, I mean the wig thing was honestly my biggest shock Wig's big That's your biggest shock I think the guy who hit the cycle through the sisters That'll stick with me No, but here's the thing If anything, it just shows How much has not changed My ex-stepdad went on to marry two other women with three young girls And I think it's also interesting that he was suing the side piece. Cause like I, like, look, everybody can be harmed by divorce and each party can lose money. It could be an, especially in California where it was a no fault state, but it is quite interesting that back then the man was like, and I'm, I'm suing cause the narrative has changed so much to women taking all men's money. And it's like, and we should get a human thing we should you're right we should get back to the old ways i uh completely agree and i think that for every article in this paper i'm actually gonna go through instagram and start suing all of my ex-boyfriends there we go there it is by the way that's an afternoon that's gonna be a great afternoon that is a great way to spend the day uh well beth people can go to bethstelling.com to watch you on the road you are a fucking great comic so we appreciate you being here people should go check you out and uh thank you guys that's really nice and thanks for having me on it was nice to take a stroll down back to the year i was born 1903 in the town you was born in that's right yes hey what's up doll heads this is gareth reynolds from the dollop the podcast you're listening to hey i've got some very exciting information uh if you like movies and you're in the san jose area I made a movie. It's called Give It Up, and it will be at the Cinequest Film Festival. You can go to giveituppilm.com for tickets and information. It'll be March 15th is the main screening, so go to giveituppilm.com. Also, if you like stand-up comedy, February 4th I'll be in Spokane, February 5th Bend, Oregon. Then I'll be in Portland, February 6th and February 7th, three shows that night. Then I'll be at Flappers in Burbank, February 21st, Bakersfield, February 27th for two shows. I will be in Albuquerque, New Mexico, April 19th, Tulsa, Oklahoma, April 21st, Bricktown Comedy in Oklahoma City, April 22nd, Dallas, Texas, April 23rd, Tyler, Texas, April 24th, finally. Houston, April 25th two shows, Austin at the Great Cap City April 26th and then San Antonio, April 28th and Tucson, April 29th garethreynolds.com for tickets and information but also if you want to go see my movie and you're in the San Jose area