Summary
Amy Poehler interviews Gwyneth Paltrow about her return to acting in the film Marty Supreme after a 10-year hiatus. The conversation covers her career evolution, codependency recovery, wellness practices, and reflections on fame and personal growth.
Insights
- High-volume early career output (15 films in 5 years) led to burnout and a deliberate decade-long break, suggesting unsustainable industry practices for young actors
- Codependency recovery and learning to set boundaries directly improved both personal relationships and professional decision-making around age 40
- Public figures face unique challenges with projection and criticism, requiring resilience and humor to maintain agency over personal narrative
- Director Josh Safty's approach of keeping actors uncertain and challenged (asking for opposite interpretations) builds trust and elicits authentic performances
- Wellness practices are highly individualized; one-size-fits-all health advice can be counterproductive given different genetics, phenotypes, and tolerances
Trends
Return-to-work narratives for high-profile women in entertainment after extended breaks gaining cultural prominenceWellness and biohacking practices (cold plunging, mouth taping, bone density optimization) becoming mainstream lifestyle topics with nuanced gender considerationsDirector-driven casting based on actor voice and specific vision rather than availability or marketabilityCodependency and boundary-setting emerging as critical professional development topics for high-achieversNostalgia-driven cultural reassessment of 1990s-2000s films and their lasting impact on audiencesEmphasis on direct communication and radical honesty in professional relationships as productivity and trust-building toolEnneagram personality typing gaining adoption in mainstream culture for self-understanding and relationship dynamics
Topics
Acting Career Comeback After Extended BreakCodependency Recovery and Boundary SettingDirector-Actor Collaboration and Trust BuildingBurnout Prevention in High-Volume Creative WorkCold Plunging and Gender-Specific Wellness PracticesBone Density Optimization for Women Over 50Public Projection and Celebrity Narrative ControlEnneagram Personality Typing (Type 1 and Type 8)Sleep Optimization and Evening RoutinesCasting Methodology and Character Voice WritingSNL Performance and Sketch Comedy CommitmentDivorce Communication and Conscious UncouplingFilm Industry Waiting and Production EfficiencyMouth Taping and Sleep QualityHeavy Resistance Training for Women
Companies
Nespresso
Coffee machine sponsor; Virtuo Up model featured with promo code 'Amy' for coffee mugs
Visible
Wireless carrier sponsor; $25/month unlimited data plan with limited-time $19/month offer using code 'switch26'
Marvel
Discussed regarding on-set waiting time and production inefficiency compared to TV and SNL
The Ringer
Production company for Good Hang podcast; handles show production
PaperKite
Co-production company for Good Hang podcast
People
Josh Safty
Director of Marty Supreme; discussed casting approach, actor direction methods, and film's reception
Timothy Chalamet
Co-star in Marty Supreme alongside Gwyneth Paltrow
Maya Rudolph
Childhood best friend of Gwyneth; fathers were college friends; remained close through adulthood
Paul Thomas Anderson
Director Gwyneth worked with early in career; mentioned as formative influence
David Fincher
Director Gwyneth worked with early in career; mentioned as formative influence
James Gray
Director of Two Lovers featuring Gwyneth; discussed as later career work
Robert Pattinson
Actor in Good Time, directed by Josh Safty
Adam Sandler
Actor in Uncut Gems, directed by Josh Safty
Rob Lowe
Mentioned for 60th birthday party where Gwyneth last saw Amy Poehler; nicknamed 'Rolo' on set
Brad Pitt
Gwyneth's husband; mentioned regarding evening routines and watching content in bed
Chris Martin
Gwyneth's ex-husband; 'conscious uncoupling' divorce term caused public backlash
Anne Roth
Legendary costume designer for Talented Mr. Ripley; known for not allowing actors to keep costumes
Wes Anderson
Director known for specific prop and costume choices; Royal Tenenbaums mentioned
Rashida Jones
Parks and Rec co-star who loves hanging with Gwyneth and trusts her style advice
Keanu Reeves
Gwyneth's first real celebrity crush mentioned in movie speed round
Judd Nelson
Actor from Breakfast Club; Gwyneth preferred him over Patrick Swayze in that film
Robin Williams
Actor Gwyneth got to know briefly during Good Will Hunting press; praised his performance
Elliot Smith
Musician who composed music for Good Will Hunting; praised for contribution
Lauren Hill
Musical performer at SNL 50th anniversary; Anna and Will's Bobby and Marty sketch followed her
Kendrick Lamar
Artist whose song was referenced in SNL 50th anniversary Bobby and Marty sketch
Quotes
"I'm a recovering codependent. So I used to do anything and everything, not to say the thing that would make the waters choppy. And then I realized how many more problems I caused."
Gwyneth Paltrow•Codependency discussion
"When you don't say what needs to be said in the moment to spare somebody else's feelings, first of all, like you're rejecting the truest part of yourself. And then it's going to come out another way."
Gwyneth Paltrow•Boundary-setting discussion
"I think that's by design, you know, to sort of unearth something surprising or very real or. Do you like that when people keep you challenged a little bit?"
Gwyneth Paltrow•Director Josh Safty discussion
"I believe in, I mean, also because I'm such a researcher and such a guinea pig. I want to share, I want to share the learnings, then take it or leave it."
Gwyneth Paltrow•Wellness practices discussion
"I really believe that there's no one size fits all solution. Like we're all so different. We have such different genetics, different phenotypes, different tolerances, allergies, toxic loads."
Gwyneth Paltrow•Health and wellness discussion
Full Transcript
Hello everyone, welcome to another episode of Good Hang. We have a great guest today. It is the one, the only Gwyneth Paltrow. Gwyneth and I, we get into it. We're going to talk about a lot of things. We're going to talk about codependency, bone density. I mistake her for Nicole Kidman and we'll never forget it for the rest of my life. And also we talk about her new film, Marty Supreme, out now and her return to acting. So it's a great conversation. But we always do this thing before our guests come and join us where we talk well behind their back and speak to someone and get a question from them. And joining me via Zoom is the director of Marty Supreme, Josh Safty. Josh has made a bunch of really amazing films, including Good Time with Robert Pattinson and Adam Sandler's Uncut Gems. And this is another big hit. So let's join Josh and see where he's talking to us from. Hi Josh. This episode of Good Hang is presented by Nespresso. For those who never compromise on their morning rituals, especially their coffee ritual, Nespresso's new Virtuo Up makes your first cup, you're asistable. With a three-second start, easy open lever and dedicated coffee creations mode button, it's even easier to brew the bold coffee over ice or milk. It's your coffee your way. Nespresso. Shop now exclusively at nespresso.com and use code Amy to receive a set of lume coffee mugs when you spend $50 or more while supplies last. I'm I catching you in a trailer or in the back of a kitchen? Yeah, in the back of a kitchen. Where are you? Where are we talking to you from? I'm in I'm in I'm doing grueling press and London and they double book me. They this was kind of added late. So I'm actually eating in the kitchen. Oh, yeah, I can I do it. They said, can I do it in the bathroom? And they said, no, because we need to have access to the bathroom. I said, do you have anywhere that I can do it? So sit the pastry thing because it's like morning stuff. So they said it's pretty, the traffic here is quite minimal. So well, you know, as a director, it kind of makes sense that there's some interesting depth to the shot. Yeah, yeah, I hope so. I mean, I actually am hoping that people are some really good pastries here. Yeah, really like look here. Let me see, let me see. Oh, geez, we got a croissant. We got let me see that. Yeah, there's like a braided something. What is that? Hello, sorry. Hello. Now there's someone coming to get the pastries. Thank you. Thank you. Listeners, now that someone came behind and are grabbing the pastries from behind our set and we're going to need those pastries in there for continuity. We have to get those pastries back, Josh. Some more. So. Well, you haven't had a chance to meet you and I am a huge, huge fan of your films and your work. Sorry. Wait, listeners, there's another person behind Josh getting some more pastries right now. It's amazing. What about that? Well, it's hard to make a good movie. Congratulations on making many. And this movie seems awesome. And you work with Gwyneth and Timothy Chalamet, so many other great people in your film. First of all, your casting is super interesting. How do you approach casting? You're like, you have someone in mind when you're writing or like, how do you approach casting in general? I for most of the writing process, I try to think of somebody and write with their voice. So like casting Gwyneth is reason why I wrote it for her is like, I have this memory of her. Obviously, she was acting until pretty recently. But I have this memory of her as like a teenager. As like a kid in the movies, like, you know, obviously, or earlier, like seven and hard A, PTA and Fincher and my son, photographer shot seven, like those were like early, like you're into filming like, wow, these are so, but then like talented Mr. Ripley and great expectations and a perfect murder, amazing movie that she plays and later two lovers by James Gray. I mean, she's talked about as a movie star who hasn't acted in a long time immediately. And that, I think for her also was really, really special because it was, it was easy for her to tap into that. But she like brought, she's cool. She's like, like a boulder, but also a feather at the same time. So she's like, she brings that to the movie in such a great way, but she, she sent me right before we started shooting. I, I scheduled it so that the first thing that we shot was her, like acting on, her character acting on stage for the first time in 25 years. So, and she turns me, she's like, I hope I remember how to do this. And it was something so like, this person I've, like, looked up to and one of my greatest actors and I just, you know, revered her and how she's coming to me and she's so vulnerable. And it was so human, it was so like perfect. It was so perfect. That's the thing I think is so interesting about Gwyneth is she balances those two things, like a lot of real, like self-awareness and self-assuredness and confidence and then a very open, creative and vulnerable quality, both of them, a lot. And I really, I'm so interested in talking to her about exactly that, that moment in your film. And wait, here are you guys talking about that. The moment in the film when she is on stage and she kind of gets this glee that she's back. Oh, great moment. Great moment. And it's shot so beautifully and captured so beautifully and it does feel like we're talking to her in that moment when she's feeling like I'm an actress again, whatever. And do you ever even really stop? And to your point, I mean, she is one of the guests that I feel like is the most projected upon. She is used to being looked at, which is already a hard thing. Like, she can withstand being looked at. That's a hard thing. I can't. No, I can't. I got my wife and I got married at City Hall partially because I didn't want to like stand on a aisle and get looked at. And she's like, as people say, she's got that dog in her, you know, and she can, she's a lot. I mean, when I first went to meet with her, I just kept telling my agents, just please just get me in front of her. I was like full on Marty and I pull up to her house and I go in. And there's this thing that Hollywood does that people don't, sorry. But there's someone else coming for croissant spot. People don't know about this. And it's something that I like learned in Hollywood a little bit later. It's like, when you go and you meet someone in particular, someone of power, you go in and they have this trick that they do, I'm sure you know about this where you have the assistant or someone they work with comes in after 15 minutes and they say, Oh, you know, we have your next meeting is here. Do you want me to push it? Do you want me to like, do you want to, you know, jump now? And they, that's like a little thing is to get them out of the meeting. Like, this is a hard one. I'm going to get out of it. And I saw her assistant come in after 15 minutes. It's like, Oh, man, that was so brief. And but it was, we were really connecting on the history of this character. She's like, No, you know, just push it. I was like, All right, I mean, and she pushed it like four times. So when I left, I was like, I think I did it. I think I like convinced her to do this just based on the push rule. Yes. Well, I know you are about to eat. And there's nothing more. You know, it's the first rule of directing when you have a croissant in the shot, you're going to have to eat it by the end of the, of the, one of the ones with the low. Look at this over here. Let's see what else we got. Josh is directing us. Oh, chocolate covered donuts. Okay. So to finish out, we, I asked my guests, my Zoom guests to give me a question for the guest I'm talking to you. Is there anything big or small, you know, important, non-important that you would want to hear in this conversation with me and her or like you wanted to always ask her or advice or thoughts or anything that comes to mind? Oh, man. What did your son think of the movie? Beautiful. Because you guys just had a premiere. He just saw it. And I spoke to him very briefly. And he was, he felt he had this kind of high about him. But I didn't get to talk, you know, you get pulled in all these directions. But I wanted to talk to him more. And his, his name is Moses and the dog's name in the movie is Moses. And Moses, Moses is the purveyor, the moral. He's the moral purveyor. So I love that. And also Josh, I just find it so awesome that, you know, as the movie's coming out and it's getting these huge reviews and it's, it's out. People are getting to see it. You still care about what people think of it. You know, like it's, it's important for you to hear how it's in the room in the room. I try not to pay attention or read the other stuff. Well, I'm here to tell you what's the thing. I don't think I hope so. It's a hit, baby. Oh, thank you. You got to, you have a good meter on you. So that I'll like think you're not bullshitting me there. No, it's a hit. The kids love it. The critics love it. Awards all day, babe. Get ready. I don't believe in jinxes. Thank you so much for your time. I can't wait. Thank you. Send me a photo of you eating any baked goods that you get to get in that kitchen. Okay. And I really hope the camera didn't see me touch in the food. No, thank you so much. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for your time. Such a pleasure. Have a good time talking to Gaina. She's, she's, it's like talking to a movie star. I can't wait. Okay, thanks so much, Josh. Appreciate your time. Bye. This episode is brought to you by Visible. Got a resolution to save. Kick 2026 off right with Visible. It's a one line wireless plan with unlimited data and hotspot for $25 a month. Taxes and fees included all on Verizon's 5G network. It's the ultimate wireless hack to save money and still get great coverage and a reliable connection. Now for a limited time, new members can get the Visible plan for just $19 a month for the first 26 months. Ring in the New Year with code switch 26. Share the savings with a deal that is too good to keep quiet. Switch now at Visible.com. Terms apply limited time offers subject to change. See Visible.com for plan features and network management details. What? Quinnance is here. Quinneth Paltrow is here and we're checking her earrings. I mean, I feel like maybe I'm going to be a little bit more patient. I feel like I need to come to you for this advice. I'd love to see one off. I agree. What about that? I like that better. Oh my God. Oh God. No, I'm thrilled that you took my ear. Oh God, these are the worst. Yeah. I felt like they're like these big boingers. Yeah. Why do I need to do that? And were they clip on? Yes, and they were really painful. Yeah. Yeah, I don't think you need to buoy it up. No more buoying ears. No more buoying or big boingers on your ears. That's what we're saying for 2026. Hi. Hi. Are you happy you're doing this? Thank you for being here. I've not seen you in such a long time. No, I was trying to think. I feel like the last time we may have seen each other was Rob Lowe's 60th birthday party. The most incredible, young looking 60 year old in the world, Rob Lowe, incredible. It's all the plastic surgery. Yeah. Over and over and over again. Over and over. I mean, and I feel like I got to see briefly there and sat next to your wonderful husband and had a really good convo with Brad. But yeah, that was it, but we didn't get to, we didn't get a good hang. You know what I mean? We didn't. I'm very excited to talk to you today. Oh, thanks. Thanks for being here. Please lower your expectations. I'm going to enjoy a low expectation too. But I wanted to kind of start in the present. We play this character in Marty Supreme who is coming back to acting. You are also doing that in a real way in the film. You haven't been in a movie for 10 years. And there's this really beautiful moment in the movie where the actress hears the response. And it's really cool. And has this feeling of like just, I don't know, joy of being doing something again. Did you feel that when you were making this movie? I did. I did feel it. I was so, I don't know. It was like such a special group. You know, sometimes you do a project and you're like, oh, this feels really special. You know, it feels like it feels like we're making something worthwhile. I don't know if people will like it or not, but it's like a real swing and everyone's great at their job. And so I was like, wow, I think I missed this. You know, it felt so, I don't know, like not pedestrian. Like it felt very unique and like special. So we have this thing where we talk to people behind their back well, behind their back before they come on. Oh, boy, okay. And we talked to Josh Safty. And what was it like to work with him? What kind of directors he, what was that experience like? It's just great. And he's brilliant and kinetic and, you know, what I love about working with him too is you never quite know what he's going for. So you never totally relax. You know, you're like, what is he actually saying? Like what, what do I, or like you'll do something one way and then he'll ask you to do the exact opposite and then back to the first way. So you're like, what do you want? What are we going for? I think that's by design, you know, to sort of unearth something surprising or very real or. Do you like that when people keep you challenged a little bit? Yeah. Yeah, I do. Yeah. Like, because it's like a trust that they feel like you can handle it. As long as I think they're a good director. Right. Right. That's right. Because when someone's doing it, when you're, I'm sure you've had this happen. There's no worse feeling. In any job that you do, anywhere where you show up where you're like, uh oh, the person in charge is not ready or good. It's just, I think what happens as an actor on that set is you become risk averse. Mm hmm. You're like, I'm not going to go too far out on a limb here because I don't know if I'm in safe hands or not. Are you the kind of person that would take over a situation if there wasn't a good captain? No. I mean, I would like in the AD department. I do anyway. I'm like, guys, come on. Let's go. What are we doing? Me too. I'm like, yeah, I actually, it's actually like a problem I have to work on, which is like, stop trying to shape the day. Right. I mean, I just like, I think I have an efficiency issue, you know, and like when I, I think what also really messed me up was when I went to go do glee and I saw how much they got done in one day. TV is incredible. It's a machine. It's like you are never sitting there. Yeah. You work all day, everything's so quick. You leave the sat and you're like, oh my god, we accomplished so much. You know, we're like on a Marvel movie. You're like in your trailer for 14 hours. I know. And then even take, take TV and then go to SNL, which is emergency room, which is like, we need something tomorrow. Yeah. No problem. And then in films, it's like six months out. You're like, we can't do it. I'm going to come and get me. I'm going to die. I'm going to die in my trailer. I know time is really weird. It's weird. Yeah. Like time is your currency. Like that's the only thing that's important left. That's right. And we're not getting, they're not making any more of it. So Josh was so, so, and he said something very sweet. Like his question for you, which is such a director's question and such a question from a director whose film has just come out is, what did your son think of the movie? I wanted to know what Moses thought of the movie. That's so sweet. He loved the movie. Yeah. I mean, he, I, after the screening when I saw him, I said, he's like, it was incredible. It was, I mean, I had to kind of watch like this because there's some kissing. Sure. So that he was not a big family. Yeah. But other than that, he loved it. So many people project so much stuff on you, Gwyneth. Like you get so much stuff projected on you. You spoke at the Hollywood Reporter event. You were receiving an award, the Sherry Lansing woman leadership award. And you spoke really beautifully about it about this idea of versions of ourselves. Because I do think that every woman, every, everyone, man, woman understands it. Like, hopefully if you're doing some work and you're having some life experience, you keep kind of shedding stuff and figuring out things about yourself. And having those versions kind of be out in the world is really difficult because people get to have opinions about it. But everybody understands that feeling. Yeah. Okay. With that in mind, I want to go to like the tiny doll, the little Gwyneth because I kind of, I know people that knew you when you were little. You sure do. You know, my Rudolph went to elementary school with you. What do you remember about being with her when you two were little, little people? Well our fathers were best friends from Tulane University. And so Maya came to our elementary school right after her mother died, unfortunately. And I remember my dad saying, oh, my friends, you know, daughters coming. And we just became great friends since seven years old. Yeah. You know, I think our senses of humor really developed together with, you know, our other best friend and or a couple of them. And then they all went to high school together. I moved to New York, but stayed close with them forever and ever. It must be nice to have Dick Rudolph, Maya's amazing dad in your life too, because he knows so much about your dad who passed, like, to have somebody who knew your dad went. That's always the best. It's so important. It's so important. It's like it conjures them again, you know, when they're in the room, they talk about them. And then it's like all of a sudden you feel the person. It's so nice. So then you go to New York, you go to Spence. What kind of high school, like, what, who are you, what are you like in high school? Are you confident? I think I, so I, we moved to New York City when I started seventh grade. I was coming from California, you know, so I was like a very rare bird. And middle school, so brutal. I know. It's so tender. It's very tender. It's like scarring for life. I think it is. And it's very, everybody's trying on a lot of things. Exactly. Like, maybe I'm emo, maybe, maybe I like, I only talk to animals. Right. I was trying all kinds of things. How old were you when you did your, was hard at your first film with PTA? No. First film I was probably 18 something like that. I had a few films where I had like one line, you know. It's sometimes it's hard to have one line because there's a lot of pressure. And you're like in the mirror saying you're one line saying it again. Did you ever get fired from a job? I got fired from like, I worked in Madison Avenue to Toy Store and I got fired. But you mean like a movie job? Why did you get fired from the Toy Store? Do you remember? My parents always made my brother and I have jobs after school. And so I didn't know that like, oh, everyone doesn't just go on spring break. Like people have jobs. So I went on spring break and then, and then I came back and I remember the look on this face. She's like, no, she was like, no toys were sold. She's like, you, this is not how life works. She's like, you're done here. I was so crushed. Oh, yeah. I was like 12. It was really, it was for it all. 12. I should have sued her for child labor law violations. Yeah. But anyway, I feel like I got, I did get, you know, I was supposed to do a movie at one point where, and it was like right after the kind of conscious uncoupling thing with Chris and there was like a lot of, a lot of harsh stuff in the press. And I think the distributor was like, this might be too, too hot to touch. Interesting. Yeah. They were like, we don't need the heat. Yeah. Interesting. So that was great because I was getting into force and then I got fired off. So awesome. And you were like, oh, sorry that my divorce is bothering you. Yeah, sorry. I mean, if I can stay there for a second, boy, you were ahead of your time. Yeah. You really were. Thank you. Because you gave, which is good and bad. I know. It's not probably not easy. I think you've been in that position before. But you, like you gave a war, are you getting it wasn't your term, it was a term you were talking about. Yes. To, to like bracket this idea that if you want to, you can try to make the dissolution of a marriage be one that isn't deeply painful. You can try your best. You can have all of the feelings, but you can still try together to make like a conscious effort to do that. That's what you were talking about. And it's really interesting that people had such big reactions to that. Yeah. Huge. Because I think, like say you had had a really nasty divorce or your parents had had a really nasty divorce. And then you hear this idea that like, you don't, it doesn't have to be done this way. I think the implicit learning is like, oh, fuck, like they're saying I did something wrong. And which of course was not the intention. But I think of course, I mean, that makes sense to me. Like, oh, no. Like is the inference that I mess someone up? Like, that's not a nice thing to contemplate. So I do understand why it was so personal for people because it was. Like you only get to see that kind of reaction when it's personal. So true. And I think too, you know, we're all, we're all like when we're defensive about anything, it's saying a lot about about something. And when we're hurt, we say things we don't mean, you know, we get angry, we respond. Like, yeah, that's human, that's humanity. Yeah. Comedy is a little bit interesting in this way too, which is like what we ridicule, like what we make fun of. And it says so much about us, like what we laugh at makes us so much about what we think is. And it's, it's, it's, it tells on you, like it really tells on you. Totally. You reveal yourself. You do. And I have to say, I've always really admired your sense of humor about people's reactions to things. Like if you have to, you have to kind of have it. And we got to experience, I mean, we, we, I got to, like, do us and now with you and see how funny you were. And it was, we did have fun. I was just thinking today about the stuff that we did together. Do you remember? I was thinking about that. I was thinking about that sketch we did where we'll play our dad. Yeah. And we were like angry dad. And we were like gangster teenagers, like thinking we were, we were gangsters. Yeah. Like I think the joke of the scene was we just quietly ate dinner. We were like scraping the plate. We would like have an outburst and then go back to like quietly eating like awkward teenagers with the family. The second time I was definitely less nervous. The third time I was, yeah, I feel like I got to sort of enjoy it. And it was fun to like meet different incarnations of the cast and stuff. And like I think I was on like Jimmy's first season. I know there was a sketch with you and Drage and Jimmy when they used to do like Celia and Denise, like Boston teens. Oh, yeah. They were at the prom. Oh my God, that's right. I totally forgot about that. Yeah. And you did a pretty good Boston accent, I have to say. Thank you. That's not easy. It isn't easy. Now I married a guy from Boston. So does he, does he? I mean, Bostonians are really picky about the Boston accent, you know? Well, there's different kinds of sort of the petition one. And then there's like pretty much gone. Pretty much gone. The Kennedy one is kind of gone. Yeah. And there's just like kind of your local Dunkin' Donuts. And that doesn't have really a Boston accent except like on O-words. Like he's like stock. He's like stock? Yeah, you can just like, it's like very... Oh, that's nice. Yeah. He's like socks. It's just subtle, but it's there. Totally socks. I get it when I get a little angry or a little tired. You do? I had a hard time when I would do Parks and Rec with the word, I still have a hard time with it. Government. How do you say it in the book? I want to say government. Right. Like I want to go... I want to skip over the ERN. I want to get rid of the R. Yeah, I get rid of that. Yeah, I get from cares. I get to say it your way. Okay, you're an actress. You do 15 movies in five years. Wow. That's psycho. I mean, babe. That's problematic. How did you do that? I have no idea. Probably why I quit for 10 years afterwards. I was like, no, I'm not doing that. No, 15. That's insane. I know. Can you imagine? I just like, that put, like this sort of touches back in what we were talking about, which is I didn't feel like I knew myself and had the agency to say. Yeah. No. I felt like I better just keep going and going and going and I didn't bring a lot of strategy to it. You know, yeah, well, you don't know. You don't know. Like we can't be tough on ourselves. We were, you know, you're trying to figure out, especially in your 20s. I mean, your 20s is I think a really difficult decade. Oh my gosh. It really is. It is. It's just, you don't know at all who you are. If there's a problem, do you like people, how do you like people telling you about a problem? Let's say, um, I'll make up a problem. Like let's say someone isn't going to show up for something that you want to do. Like you're scheduled to do something today and it's not going to happen. How do you like being told about the problem? Just straight up. Yeah. That's what I suspect. I don't want to preamble. I don't want you to soften the language. Yes. Just be direct. Same. A direct approach. It's always and and are you direct with other people? Yes. Now I am. And I didn't used to be. Do they, do you, what do you do when you notice that your directness makes them uncomfortable? What do you do with their uncomfortable feeling? Yes. Well, I'm a recovering codependent. So I used to do anything and everything, not to say the thing that would make the waters choppy. And then I realized how many more problems I caused. Like real problems, you know? I so relate. Can you say more about that? Yeah. I think when you don't say what needs to be said in the moment to spare somebody else's feelings, first of all, like you're rejecting the truest part of yourself. And then it's going to come out another way. And that's like you'll end up being dishonest. You'll end up not saying what needs to be said. You'll end up stringing out some lame relationship for eight extra months and treating them not so nicely because you have stuck yourself in something. You know, you just make a mess. So I think around the time I turned 40 is when I started to move into this, like I really need to stop doing this. And I worked with a coach on how to hold the uncomfortable feelings of somebody else and disappointing somebody else. I really had a problem with it with men, like when I worked with men, a really hard time disappointing them or saying something that wasn't aligned with their version of things. And now, I don't know. And then it's so self honoring when you just speak the truth and you can do it very kindly. Like, and it's also not your responsibility to take care of somebody's feelings when you've simply said the truth. It's a huge, I'm not just women. Everyone needs to learn it. Especially when you learn as a woman, our age that people are responsible for their own feelings. It sounds like a very simple thing, but it's very, very hard to learn. Yep, yep, yep, yep. Now that you're in a new film, like we're able to look back at some of the films that you have been in and see, like, be kinder to yourself about stuff. Like are you able to be a little bit sweeter to yourself about anything? Yeah, I mean, I think as far as the work is concerned, I think that I had such a long break and things have changed. And you know, it's like, now I'm like the venerable old, you know, you know what I mean? And like, I did this interview with Jacob Alority the other day and he was like, you've done this and this and I'm like, fuck, I'm old as hell. Like so weird. People are like, my mom, I remember my mom, my mom's you, my mom, my mom was in high school. She loved SNL. Yeah, I'm like, can I get a selfie for my mom? Like, how old am I? But I do think that, you know, there's been a bit of a, it's so interesting because now I'm like, oh yeah, like I did these things that now, you know, at the time, you don't think that they're going to be whatever. And then it's like, you know, people send you 10 pictures every Halloween of Margot Ten and bomb costumes or like people say like, oh God, I had a sliding doors moment where I X Y and Z, you know what I mean? It's like cultural things. Yes, exactly. And I, and oh, I worked with this great director in his first film and this one and a second. And then he's like, yeah, cool, like I did do that stuff. That's neat, you know, and it feels like for the first time I'm able to feel the impact of the work that I did earlier in my life. Okay, so with that in mind, I'm going to do a quick speed round with you about your movies because you've been in so many. And I feel like you've talked about them forever. But here we go with speed round. She experienced love. What words help you get into a British accent? You know, it's like the vowels, like you sort of have to change the placement of the vowels. Like, so any words like the A's, the O's and words like perfect. Mm. Cold mountain. How cold was the mountain? I was an in cold mountain. Oh, forget it then. But thanks for thinking of Nicole Kidman. Bonus! I don't know, but I'm so happy you did. I was like, what was it like working with you? Maybe husband Tom Cruise. Oh, he was hot. Yeah, I bet. Iron man. Is there a lot of waiting around? You answered that. That was my question. Is there a lot of waiting around on Iron Man? So much waiting. Crafty must be good. Marvel crafty must be insane. I don't know. Interesting. They cheap out on. I have to say, I think like, I think snack foods can be dangerous. And snacking is like, at least I know for me, is completely emotional. Yeah. Completely emotional. Yeah, it is, isn't it? Yeah. It's just like if you're not having a cigarette or you're going to have a drink. Those were the days. I know, remember cigarettes. We talk about it here and we know they're very bad for you, but God. God, that came up at such a great time. I know, man. I know. You know what I decided when I'm like 87, I'm going to start smoking again. Fantastic. I mean, I remember when we were in the 2000s when there was a lot of that. And then also you were the first person to say the word macrobiotic. Biotic diet. You were on a macrobiotic diet. Yeah. That was a great phase where it was like cigarettes and tofu with the brown rice and the seaweed. Like, I don't know what I was just kind of in your house while it's on fire. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Okay. Sliding doors, you mentioned it. Do you read the subway? Do I write the subway? Yeah. I mean, I haven't in a while because I don't live in New York City anymore, but when I did, I took it all the time. And you have to go pretty in Cognito. Like, do you feel like you can kind of blend? Yeah. I feel like New Yorkers are just. New Yorkers don't care. Yeah. Contagion. Was it weird that everybody was watching it during the pandemic? Yes. Everything that was watching it. I know. I got really into dark shit. I know. And it's like they wanted to see you dying. I know. It was very... You're a character. You're a character. It was very weird. I know. Um, Royal Ten and Bounds. Halloween costume. Yeah. And so much more. And so much more. You're smiling. What's here? I just love... I really love that movie. Yeah. It's a great movie. And I had such a good time making the movie. Yeah. It's such a cool character. She's so cool. She's so cool. She's so cool. I know. With her wooden finger. I know. Her... Her cigarettes. I know. And I'd quit smoking and then I had to smoke in the movie and... And you were like, oopsie. I was like, I guess I smoked again. That fur coat. Who's I do? No. It's all Wes. Wes knows every... How he wants every single prop and costume. And everything. He's so wonderfully specific. I loved that. Like I loved stepping into this drawing, you know, of his. Yeah. That's what it felt like. It's so cool. Townsend Mr. Ripley. Did you... Speaking of clothes, did you use any of your own clothes in that film or did you keep any of the clothes? You're so... I should have kept... You know, I should have kept some... I wish I'd kept a couple like one souvenir from every movie. But I never thought to do that at the time. I... Anne Roth, who's like the most legendary costume designer, did that movie. And so she was just so amazing. Oh, I love those costumes so much. But legendary costume designers can also be really intimidating, like they... Yeah. Because they don't let you keep anything. That's true. View from the top. Did Flight Attendance talk to you about that? They do. Yeah. That's the best part of having done that movie. Do you ever think about like a fantasy other job you would do? Would there be a job like... Whether it's Flight Attendant or like where you would feel like you'd be good at? I would like to be a chef if I wasn't. Like I think I could have done that. Well, I love cooking and food. Mm-hmm. Yeah. That would be... I could have like a little restaurant somewhere. Mm-hmm. You know? I'm a hook. Yeah. Robin Williams. Oh my gosh. I didn't get to do it. I thought you were just about to say I wasn't in hook. No, I wasn't. Not panicking. Panicking. Don't think I will forever think all my whole life that I said you were in Cold Mountain. But I just want you to know, this is an honest mistake. I mean, I... Nicole Kidman and I are very interchangeable. Thank you very much. But, did you work with Robin? No. Did you get to know him? You know, I only got to know him a bit when Goodwill Hunting came out. Because I was dating one of the people who wrote that movie and was in that movie. We're well aware. And so I got to know him that. So you guys were dating during Goodwill Hunting? Fantastic Boston movie. After. Okay. But when it was coming out. And so he was around for that press and stuff. Yeah. He's so good in that movie. Oh, well he's so good. That movie really is... I love that movie. It's a perfect movie. I agree. I love it so much. It's a fantastic movie. And it's so... It's so... Like, Rainy Day movie. It's like a Rainy Day movie. And the... And Elliot Smith, who did all the music and Gus, like, it's just perfect. I love it so much. What's a Rainy Day movie that when it comes on, you're like Jackpot. I'm going to watch it. Like a Rainy Day. You know, a plain movie. It's a great thing if you're like, you know, I'm like, like, all the 80s movies. You know. Like what? Like, San almost fire. I will never not watch that if it's on. I, you know, getting back to Rob Lowe. Um-hm. Rolo, as we called him on set. I would just sometimes like sit there and... Where'd she go? Always. He loves it. And he's never had a name. He's never really had a nickname. I know. And the best thing is that like, didn't spread as much as you guys tried to make it a thing. And he... Well, you call him Rolo. I know, but I didn't go outside. You know what I mean? And he really, I think wants it to go a whole way. He's like, I've never had a nickname. I know. He loves it. I remember like the first day on set me saying, Nerolo. It was his birthday and he was shooting on his birthday and I was like, oh, have you ever been on set for your birthday? And he was like, yes, like 400. I don't think so. Right. You've had a long career. Um, San almost fire. Billy. Rolo is Billy. Rolo is Billy. Bad boy. Can't change him. Heaven. Heaven. He was never my celebrity crush. Who was? I mean, well, Keanu Reeves was my first like real. But when I watched San almost fire, like I wanted to... Like I would have gone with Judd Nelson. Oh, interesting. You wanted them more professional. Yeah. Yeah, Billy was too happy. I don't really like smart and cheater. Like that was fantastic. Yeah. Yeah. Also, when you rewatch that movie, it's like everyone is so dressed so professionally. I know. Like they're... We really did dress like we were in our 20s. We dressed like we were 60-year-old. Yeah, the 80s was treating. And it's happening again now. You know, like not that Wall Street thing, but sort of like this sort of grandma, chic, like all the, all the hymns or cool kids are sort of, you know, it's like the soft, everything's sort of soft shoulders. So tell me. Knitted things. And I got a quarter zip just for this interview. So tell me. That's looking really good. Thank you so much. Yeah. Okay. And Han, both Han, you brought up Rashida. Both Rashida and Han love you and talk about how fun it is to hang with you and how, like they both, you know, and they're, I think, representative of a lot of people who kind of want to know what you think about things because they trust your style. They trust what you said, like the work you try to do to figure out what is the best thing of things. And it's not even about the things. It's just like, is there someone who's keeping an eye out, keeping an eye out and figuring out, like, is there a better way to do something? Yeah, that's, you love that. Love that. Where do you think that comes from? I think I'm in any a Graham one. Okay, Jackpot. Here we go. I know, like, I'm always trying to improve everything. Great. So for people who listen, I don't know anyone who's listened to this, who hasn't, hopefully, what is any a Graham one? How would you describe it? Are you into any Graham thing? Very much. Again. Okay, do you want to guess my number? Nobody ever gets it right. God. There we go. I'm always, I always get the wrong, I always, people guessed the wrong number, which saddens me because I love you. Can I ask you? Yes, ask some questions. Please. Okay. Like, how would you describe yourself as someone who really enjoys a dinner party? Yes. Okay. Would you describe yourself as somebody who is very focused on achieving? Yes. Are you a peacemaker? No. You're talking about three, you're talking about nine, I'm neither one of those. I know, that's what I just cleaned. Yeah. So how? I have a peacemaker wing. Okay. Ah. So you're a one. You're not a one with a two wing. Okay. You're not an eight. Yes, I am. You are. I'm okay. You're an eight. No, this. You're an eight. You're an eight with a nine wing. Yes. So I'm not a monster, right? Because I got a little peacemaker in me. But I'm a challenge. I'm a challenge. I'm a challenge or I'm okay. And I think I hide it. But I definitely relate to all of that feeling of like authority stuff and challengingly a bit and wanting to lead and want and feeling very happy with direct people. Like I'm like, you like, I really like when people tell me truth and are direct, I can handle it all day long. Wow. But when people come sideways and like, what's going on? Yeah, it's such a bad feeling. It can feel like. Yeah. And I love any of grandma ones because ones are on it. Yeah, we're on it. And they believe in like getting it right. There's a hardest on themselves. Oh, yeah. They are really hard on themselves. Yeah. But we are trying to make things better, right? We're the reformer. So you're always, and I've always been like refining to figure out what is a better way to get efficient, like to do it like, yeah, to improve yourself, to feel contentment, to reduce inflammation, to be a good partner, to be a good, divorced person. Yeah. Okay. So with your striving for perfection in mind, I have another one more speed round. Oh. Okay. Perfection speed round. Here we go. Make it perfect. I have a whole bunch, a lot of controversy about whether or not it's right for women. I said that I do it. And there were a lot of comments saying it's not good for women. Do you do it? Do you like to do it? How do you feel about it? I do do it more sparingly like my husband does it every single day. So I spend a lot of time researching this. And what I think I understand that the net net of it is cold plunging is not unilaterally terrible for women. But we kind of need to listen to ourselves and maybe not the water quite as cold as the men like that, maybe not quite as long as the men. And to just be mindful of where we are, you know, if we're exhausted and, you know, because it can be quite taxing on the body, but it's still, there are still benefits for us. Speaking of temperature, what do you like for your sleeping temperature? Well, the older I get, the colder I like it. Me too. I like, you know, in the 60s. Yeah. Me too. Ooh, I love cookies. Alcohol after 50. Oh, why do they have to ruin it? I know. It's like, it's a disaster. It's a disaster. It's such a bummer. Coffee? Yes, big time. I'm a big coffee drinker. How do you drink your coffee? With raw heavy cream. What? I know. Shocked. I know. That's for a New York of you and not California. I know. Good job. I'm like the, I'm not the alt milk queen. Yeah. Same. Yeah. Oh, you do have regular milk or milk? I have cow milk or half an hour. Yeah. Yeah. No shame in it. But I don't really do coffee. I do tea. Oh, because coffee is a little. Mm-hmm. Very English. Wow. Okay. Lemon water. Love it. Great. Bone density. What are we going to do about it? We're going to, we're going to, you know, talk to our doctor about potential estrogen supplementation. Totally. We're going to do heavy weights. Yes. Lots of heavy weights. Are you doing heavy weights? Yeah. I do it on this giant, really heavy Pilates reformer thing called a lagre. Fantastic. That seems to be good right now. Yeah. Look at that. A former. It's called the lagre. It's very, very good. And we're going to gag down protein 70 times a day. Oh. Bones broth. Has that come and gone? Bone broth is great. That was great. I still like bone broth. I think it's, it's fantastic for your gut. It's full of protein and collagen, all the things. For some reason people thought like I only drank bone broth. Yeah. But I, I'll have it as like a cup of tea in the afternoon. That's my favorite way to have it. It's amazing. Sleep routine. Talk me through it. Okay. So I have to take a bath every night. Wow. Yeah. Have to. Non-negotiable. Interesting. And if there's not a bath tub, then I have to shower. Like I got to get the day off with water. And I think part of my good sleep routine is eating dinner early. So not going to bed on a full stomach. Yes. What time do you like to eat dinner? I like it at 6. I like to. I make my reservations at 6 p.m. So do I. I love it so much. So great. And I honestly sometimes I like to be the first person in the restaurant. I was last night. I did 545 last night. Incredible. To be in bed and have eaten by 8 o'clock. Oh. Is there anything better? No. I think about bedtime all day. Me too. I love it so much. I love it so much. And then Brad and I usually watch something in bed, which I know you're not supposed to do. I know. But you know, it's so deeply relaxing to me. Yeah. Get in there at a cold room and like watch some serial killer or doing something. So great. And then you know, go to sleep and then oh, I have mouth tape and ear plugs and mouth tape. Yeah. I'm big into the mouth tape. I know that's controversial too. Mouth tape because there's a whole mouth tape movement. There's pro. There's but but mouth tape is helpful. Do you are your grinder? I'm a grinder. So it's helpful for me. Also, I really believe that there's no one size fits all solution. Like we're all so different. Totally. We have such different genetics, different phenotypes, different tolerances, allergies, toxic loads. Like we're all this idea that one thing works for everyone I think is not true. See, this is why we love you, Quinneth. It's true. You just said all the stuff in it is like your. You are not selfish. You are not a gatekeeper. No, that I am not. You're like, I'm trying this. Would you like to try this? I don't think this works, but who knows? Right. You are. It's interesting. It's kind of like the, even though you're maybe consider yourself a person who's trying to get it right, you're not afraid to like try and fail with things and you share it with us. For sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I believe in, I mean, also because I'm such a researcher and such a guinea pig. I want to share, I want to share the learnings, then take it or leave it. Okay. And then the last thing I'm going to ask you about is what is making you laugh? So the thing that's made me laugh the hardest and like the past year. When was the SNL thing that I lazily did not go to? Because I, you didn't go to the SNL 15? No. I know. It was a mistake and I regret it. So I just want to say that out loud. And you were like, oh, that's, you just thought like, oh, that's way to another 50 years. I was like, it seems like I had so much work at the time. It's going to be hectic. And I was like, I got to go all the way to New York and I had something the next day. So I just couldn't go. Yeah. But I watched the thing at Radio City or whatever. Yeah. What was the night before thing? Yes. Incredible music show the night before. What are you going to say? I love it. I don't know. I'm going to try to win Anna and Will. Yes. Did the church thing? I talked to Anna about it. Bobby and Marty. Did you write that? I wish. No, Paul Appell. The great Paul Appell. I incredible writer and SNL and performer and Anna and Will do these Bobby and Marty call. I, and she starts singing Kendrick Lamar. Yes. And what Anna said, which was so incredible is I'm going to tell you something. And I think I said this on, but I just want to extrapolate for a second about it. To me, it was so, it was like such a win for the comedy kids because it was such a cool night. They literally followed Lauren Hill. They came on after Lauren Hill. I mean, their job was to settle everybody. They had to go like, we're going to wait. Until you stop talking quiet. It kept telling everyone to be quiet. It was so funny. It was so funny. To me, that's like that. I don't know what brand of comedy you call that, but it's like that funny bones where what was the Kendrick Lamar song? She's like, we got, we got to look at it for a second. It was what was it? What was it? It was. Yeah, let's watch it. I hope we can get it on, like, is the 50th SNL? It was like on Hulu or something like that. Here we go. Honestly, I... Oh, come here, man. Oh, come here, man. Oh, come here, man. Oh, come here, man. I'm kind of humor. What do you call that? I'm sweating. Like, to me, what I would call that, honestly, it's a great question. To me, I would call it like, committed. Oh, you guys are so stupid. I'm like, we gotta spit take our first one. Oh, you guys are stupid. I'm like, we gotta spit take our first one. We gotta spit take our first one. I'm good hang. And it's good. It's all over my skirt. Here we go. Here's some tissue. Oh my god. Oh my god, breathe. It's so funny. Wait, let's play it again. Oh my god. I'm sweating. I'm dying. Oh my god. Okay, so that's called sketch comedy. I need a fan. We're having a hot flash. Oh my god. I'm wearing the quarters at a sketch comedy induced hot flash. Yes, I feel like what you're talking about is real, which is I feel like it is commitment. It's commitment. Here I'll take it. I'll pick it up on my way out. I feel like it's commitment. And I feel like it's character based sketch comedy with music. That's all I describe it. So to me, that's like the funniest thing I've ever seen. I know you mean. I like, you know, it's like these weird specific things. And in person, it was so funny. Oh. That was really fun. It was really fun. Quinnith, thank you so much for coming on. And we used to good hang. You're a good hang. Thank you so much, Quinnith. It's so fun to hang with you. And you gave us this first bit take that we've ever had on the show. And we hope it's not the last. So thank you so much. And you know, for this polar plunge, I want to talk about polar plunge. I want to talk about cold dips. There was a lot of controversy when I brought it up last time. And I am here to just remind you, you don't have to do it. I like it. It makes me feel alive. Slash like I'm going to die. And I like it. I know it might not be good for all women. And maybe it's not good for me. I'll find out. Okay, but I'm going to keep plunging. And it does make me feel better. Okay? I don't know. I don't want to say. I appreciate. I'm not telling anybody to do it. But if you want to do it, I think it's great. Okay, anyway. Thank you so much for listening. Thanks, Gwyneth, for joining us. And see you soon. Bye. You've been listening to Good Hang. The executive producers for this show are Bill Simmons, Jenna Weissberman, and me, Amy Poler. The show is produced by The Ringer and PaperKite. For The Ringer, production by Jack Wilson, Kat Spalane, Kaya McMullen, and Alia Zaneras. For PaperKite, production by Sam Green, Joel Lovell, and Jenna Weissberman. Original music by Amy Miles. I love the money was really good.