All right, we have the juiciest breaking news on the planet. It's absolutely delicious. The hypocrisy is exactly what we've always predicted. Turns out that Kristi Noem, you know, who's in a godly marriage, she, her husband has a secret double life and he's a cross dresser. His name is Brian. And you just know immediately when your parents spill your name Brian, B R Y O N, you know, it's going to be trouble from there. And he posts pouting busty bimbo photos and a trove of explicit messages. Pop this up, Kylie. Of course, the Daily Mail is reporting the secret double life of Kristi Noem's cross dressing husband, Brian. And so here he is with his big boobies. And he's making a little duck face for the camera while his wife, of course, is out screwing Corey Lewandowski and calling American citizens that were executed by her regime terrorists when in fact they were just peaceful protesters. The hypocrisy is always rampant with these people. Here is her husband. And these are the photos that have been on earth. There he is in his little pink panties. And he has some boobs that he puts on. And he's doing a close up, you know, pushing his boobs up to the camera and reminds you guys, these are the family values people. Here he is. He likes a big rack. Here he has on blue panties. He's very fond of this duck face. Big titty duck face. Kristi Noem's husband. There he is. The nipples are a little crooked. But I mean, you know, nobody likes a nitpicker. And he also is into a juicy booty. So here he's taking pictures of his ass, which I'm sure has been enhanced with some form of padding. So while his wife is on a killing spree at the instruction of Stephen Miller and the Trump regime while they're all telling everybody what great Christians they are, and we oppose the LGBTQ plus people and what's a woman and what's a man? Well, it turns out Kristi Noem's husband, which I don't give a shit if he cross dresses, who cares? I don't care. Do you care? Well, you care when this wife is a sanctimonious hypocritical killer? Then you care. And so this is where it gets even juicier, you guys. So an immigrant sex worker leaked the story for vengeance on the DHS policies. Pop this up, Kylie. This is very solid reporting here. Mark Caputo says, yeah, I got a weird lead. They said an immigrant sex worker possibly in the country illegally wanted to go public about Noem's husband using her services online. It was vengeance for DHS's immigration enforcement. This to me is really like all the reason we need to have a safe and secure immigration policy because this is incredible work by this sex worker to expose the hypocrisy of the people who want to be the thought police, the people who want to tell you how you can raise your children, the people who diminish any other family except for quote unquote a traditional family. And I'm just wondering per MAGA's definition is Kristi Noem and big titted Brian. Is that a traditional marriage? I'm just curious about that. I want to know what you all think in the comments sections. All right, moving along here. Here's the details of Brian's indiscretions. Pop this up. Another photo shows the rancher and businessman wearing figure hugging green leggings in a white top stretched over two bulging orbs. Remarkably, Brian's face is clearly visible in both images. He pouts playfully at the camera, seemingly unconcerned that his online activity could pose security implication for his wife's position at the heart of the Trump administration. Text and WhatsApp messages revealed that Brian was being repeatedly asked for money during the 14 months that Noem led the nation's largest federal law enforcement agency. He sent his secret roster of online acquaintances at least $25,000 via cash app and PayPal. But when the payments were delayed or failed to materialize, the chats would quickly turn sour. One of the women became so disgruntled, she posted about his behavior on social media before later deleting it. Jack Barsky, a former Soviet spy turned US counterintelligence asset told the Daily Mail the potential for blackmailing was alarming. It's astounding that somebody who spouts is that that level has that kind of bad judgment. And think about this. Christy Noem, she wanted like $200 million to do commercials for homeland security. I was at the airport the other day and she's such a narcissist. There's images of her. She's since been replaced by Mark Wayne Mullen, who I'm sure in his family, his traditional family, because he's all gone, God guns and Jesus. I'm sure there's the same type of hypocritical fuckery, the louder the Christian, the bigger the freak. It's true every single time. And so Christy Noem has now responded to the report. Pop this up. A Christy Noem rep says the quote family was blindsided by revelation of Brian's cross dressing and asked for prayers at this time. Buried in the article, Brian Noem addresses and confirms his wife's affair with Corey Lewandowski. So I just, this is, this is the thing about this, these MAGA Christians. It's always forgiveness without accountability. These are the thoughts in prayers crowd. This is how they're going to deal with this. It's going to be prayers up. They'll do a little light tongue talking. And everybody's just going to go about their way. And Big Titty Brian is going to end up putting his big titty bra back on and his big booty back on. And Christy Noem is going to continue banging Corey Lewandowski. There's no question. And she's, you know, now she's like the leader of the American Shield or something. I think Trump has wanted to fire her. And he's too scared that she could flip information about the crimes that this administration commits, particularly probably surrounding Stephen Miller. So he made up some bullshit posts for her. But let's dive into Christy Noem's godly marriage. Okay. This, this is what she says online. The affair has been common knowledge for years. This is her and Corey Lewandowski long before Noem became DHS secretary and made Lewandowski her top aide. In 2023, we reported on three witness accounts of Noem sitting in Lewandowski's lab making out in public and playing grab ass. So here are some details that our producers dug up about this. You guys, their relationship dates back to 2020. And when they would, she was sitting in his lap and they're playing grab ass during an event at Trump's Mar-a-Lago resort in December 2020. This is where the grab ass was going on. And it wasn't like two a.m. in the morning, they're drunk when they're doing this. This is like two p.m. And there were reportedly 100 to 200 people around while they made out and the lobby at a hotel at CPAC. So there's two little instances where conservative MAGA people have said, yeah, she's banging Corey Lewandowski. Meanwhile, she's, you know, oh God, and she has a cross and it's Jesus and traditional family and traditional marriage. And, you know, God's God and family and all this fucking bullshit, right? So she's banging Corey Lewandowski at Mar-a-Lago and at CPAC. And Congress asked her about her relationship with Lewandowski recently. So I want to remind you guys, Big Titty Brian has already confirmed the affair. After Big Titty Brian's Big Titties were revealed to the entire world, Brian's like, yeah, my wife's been screwing Corey Lewandowski, which we all knew. And so a Congress person asked her about this and watched the indignant smug, entitled white supremacist, bigot, hypocrite, loser. And let's remember that Donald Trump just recently said, I love hanging out with losers, right? So when he found out Christie numbs shot her dog, he's like, what a fucking loser. I want her to be in my administration. Let's play this clip. So Secretary Noem, at any time during your tenure as Director of Department of Homeland Security, have you had sexual relations with Corey Lewandowski? Mr. Chairman, I am shocked that we're going down and peddling paddloid garbage in this committee today. Reclaiming my... And ma'am, one thing that I would tell you is that he is a special government employee who works for the White House. There are thousands of them in the federal government. So reclaiming my time as Secretary, it is okay for you to be offended by the question. Any decision has no authority to be making decisions. But it is also a real question. So what I would say to you is that what we do at the Department of Homeland Security, and without any hesitation, every single day is to protect the country. If someone is asked to make decisions. Okay, so as you can see, she's a total cut. I mean, Christie Noem is just... There's no other word to describe it imaginable. And the psychopathy and what she answers that question, you know, you can tell her heart rate is steady. There's no... She's not nervous. She just feels so entitled that I'm going to tell the American public, I'm going to tell the people of South Dakota that I'm a Christian woman and I'm in a godly marriage. Our producers also dug up some stuff. Let me tell you all about this. Christie Noem said that God had different plans for their marriage for... Through it all, Brian has been our family's anchor. Big titty Brian is who she's referring to. Big titty Brian is the family's anchor. He can be the funny guy, but also a serious motivator. When with tits like that, how could anybody not be motivated about our own big titty Brian? He teaches the kids to be tough and self-sufficient while making sure they love the Lord. This is Christie Noem's quote. I'm so grateful God made Brian part of his plan for our family. His, of course, is capitalized to all the dads out there. Happy Father's Day. This is her post about Big Titty Brian. I mean, the hypocrisy, the duplicity is so delicious because it's always like this. The bigger the Republican Christian, the bigger the freak they are. Another one, Brian says it was his quote, calling from God to support Christie in whatever she decided to do. So this is what I tell you guys. This is what MAGA does to keep the cult together and it's called Christian signaling. The right accuses us of virtue signaling all the time. Maybe some leftists do that. Sure, whatever. Politics is a blood sport, but there's nothing at the level that the MAGA hypocrites use Christian signaling. And this story right here with Big Titty Brian being the anchor of the family and the Lord's put him together and the Lord said, you're the anchor and all of this shit. And I just want to leave you all with, I know you're probably asking yourself because I know I was. If Christie Noem had to fuck Mary Kill, how is she going to answer that question? Well, our producer, we have a new producer, his name's Brian. He started today. What a great day to start preparing episodes. Kylie's still here, Seth's still here. But here we have it. Mary fuck Kill. She married Big Titty Brian. She's going to fuck Corey Lewandowski and she's going to kill a dog, Cricket, RIP Cricket. I'm so sorry that Cricket had to live around this filth, this depravity. Can you imagine poor Cricket? Even when Cricket was alive, she had to live with Big Titty Brian and Corey Lewandowski and Christie Noem and all of their fake Bible study readings. All right, this has been so fun and so delicious. And I recently heard that TMZ is going to start doing more political reporting. And you guys, this is really quite good for all of us because TMZ goes gangster. And you know, the next time there's a CPAC and RNC meeting, they're going to have undercover people on Grinder. And I just say this is the type of journalism I need because we need to do reputational damage on these sanctimonious hypocrites that want to tell people how to live, who they can love, prioritize people regarding gender or skin color. They're all a bunch of cunts. All right, we'll see you later.
