NFL Trades, Raiders Dysfunction, Who’s The Next Sam Darnold? Roger Bennett In Studio Talking Soccer And World Cup + Fyre Fest Of The Week

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. At Bumble, we're all about helping you find someone who vibes with the real you. This year, meet real people on Bumble who actually want you for you. Whether you're looking for big, soul-shaking love or fun, casual dates, on Bumble, clear and honest intentions lead to better matches. When you say what you're looking for up front, you get more aligned and meaningful connections. With features like photo and ID verification, you feel more confident the person you're talking to is real. Start your year off with real connections on Bumble. Download Bumble today. On today's part of my take, presented by DraftKings, the crown is yours. We have a great show for you. Roger Bennett, our good friend Roger Bennett. He has a new book out called We Are the World Cup. He stops by in studio. We're 97 days away from the World Cup. He's just a great storyteller Great accent, great everything We're going to talk some Pre-free agency DJ Moore traded, Stephon Diggs Told he's being cut We also have Our list of QBs That are free agents We tier them, or we list them Number, and then we also have our next Sam Darnold, so we make a list of our next Sam Darnold, who's going to be the next Sam Darnold Talk a little college basketball, a little Embrace debate and then we have Fire Fest of the Week and it's all brought to you by our friends at Body Armor this episode is brought to you by Body Armor Flash IV the official rapid rehydration drink of March Madness Flash IV is packed with electrolytes delivering faster longer lasting hydration without any artificial dyes flavors or sweeteners whether you're training, traveling or just feeling the heat Body Armor Flash IV is there for you, work hard hydrate hard with Body Armor Flash IV. Grab yours today at 7-Eleven. Tell them the guys at PMT sent you. Body Armor Flash IV. Work hard. Hydrate hard with Body Armor Flash IV. Okay, let's go. Part of my take. Yeah. Part of my take. Welcome to Part of my take presented by DraftKings. The crown is yours. Today is Friday, March 6th. And it's time to change our clocks, boys. Let's go. We're actually going to do it. And I was wrong. I was wrong. It's spring forward. Yeah. I said spring back. That was a mistake. Spring forward. It's fall back. But it's this weekend. We screwed up. We always screwed up. We always screwed up. It's the weekend, and then the next weekend, that's Selection Sunday. Yes. Hank, you ready to swing forward? I am. Yeah. You don't trust us? Nope. That's bullshit. It's going to be getting sunsetting at like 630 this time next week. That's awesome. Yeah. We're there. We're here. Max, why are you looking at me like that? You don't believe us? No, I do believe you, but I'm just not realizing. Never mind. Uh-oh. Time zones? I have a flight on a morning, so now I just realize I'm losing an hour. Yeah. You've got to get there an hour earlier. Because they don't... Airports don't do the... No, the airports switch it on Monday morning. That's a fact. Because they don't want to screw up anyone on the weekend. It sucks that you have... That's taking away an hour of bar time for you on Saturday night. Yeah, no, I'm also thinking about that. That kind of stinks. But I am happy about... It's time travel. Yeah, you're time traveling. Okay, boys. We've got a lot to get to. but NFL pre-free agency. What offseason? What offseason? DJ Moore traded to the Buffalo Bills for a second rounder, and then the Bears get a second rounder this year. They give also a fifth rounder next year to the Bills. I'm sad to see DJ Moore go a little bit because he actually did kind of, when you look at the history of DJ Moore in Chicago, He took a team that sucked in terms of wide receiver rooms. Made Justin Fields look pretty good at times. Or made Justin Fields feel really good. Feel really good. He loved Justin Fields. Had some unbelievable moments this year, especially the Packers walk-off game in Week 16. Will always sit in my mind. And some not great moments, but it doesn't matter. He was a good bear. But I love this trade. I love this trade because you clear up money. He's got a big, pretty hefty contract. So you clear up money to maybe go get a Max Crosby or a Linderbaum. You get a pick. And you make the bet that Luther Burden and Roma Doonsay are going to be taking leaps forward, which I'll make that bet with Ben Johnson. Yeah, Roma Doonsay, it feels like no more excuses for Rome now. Yeah, and Luther Burden showed enough last year. Yeah, Luther Burden was awesome, but you don't get rid of DJ Moore if you don't believe that Rome can step into that role. Yeah. And DJ Moore, when he's playing and when he's not doing bad body language, is an awesome player. And he does do bad body language. I think he's first team, maybe Mount Rushmore of current NFL bad body language guys. But when he's on, like that game against the Commanders in D.C. where he had like 200 yards receiving, probably should have had 400 yards, but the refs took away some for bullshit calls. He can take over games. Yeah. And so he's a really good player. I like it for the Bills, too. I don't think he's going to be pouting too much with Josh Allen. No, I think he's perfect for the Bills because the Bills needed a real receiver, and they also couldn't take the risk of doing it in the draft again. Because if you miss on a draft pick and you have Josh Allen in his prime, it's like, what the hell are you doing? So it's good for the Bills. It's, again, good for the Bears. There's a small part of me that's like, is there going to be a moment during the season where it's like, Roma Dunes hasn't come on, taking the step forward. Luther Burden wasn't as good as his rookie year showed, and it's like we really could use DJ Moore right now. Yeah, that could possibly happen. But, again, it's trusting Ben Johnson, trusting Ryan Poles, and now you have money to go get another player, whether it be Max Crosby, Linderbaum, or someone else, and you have an extra second-round pick, which the Bulls have to be like, how did you do it? You got another second-round pick? We have all the second-round picks. Yes, collect them all. Chicago way. Yeah. Yeah, I think it's kind of a win-win. There's never a win-win. Somebody got fleeced. So I think the only win-win trade in the history of the NFL might be the McDuffie trade. Yeah. The one that just happened. Yeah. Where the Chiefs traded McDuffie to the Rams. The Rams don't give a fuck about first-round picks. They got a great player. And they still have their better first-round pick from the Falcons. So they gave up their worst first-round pick. For now. They still have it for now. For now. They still have one first-round pick from the Falcons. That's a top ten pick, I think. That, to me, is the first win-win trade in the history of the NFL. This is close. Yeah. Because I can see, like, I can talk myself into it if I'm a Bills fan. And if I'm a Bears fan, it's one of those things where it's, like, kind of a bummer, but also big picture good. It's good big picture. You had to make a move like this. The reason why it's, the contract of DJ Moore is the big thing here. I think he's owed, I think he's, like, $28 million a year, which is a lot. and you got two guys playing wide receiver on their rookie deals that you hope can be good. I will miss DJ Moore. He did have kind of a knack for the big moment, the Packers game, like I talked about. Actually, both the Packers wins because he had the game-winning touchdown against the Packers in the playoffs. I won't miss some of the pouting. But, again, I also was never – DJ Moore got a lot of shit. I was always kind of on the side of, like, I think he's better than people realize. and I'm happy for DJ Moore that he got traded to a good team because last year with the Bears was his first winning season in college or professionals. So he went through a lot of shit to get to finally be in the playoffs and play for a winning team. If he had then gotten traded to maybe the Raiders, that would have probably been a bummer for DJ Moore. He's going to a good situation, Josh Allen, and he's probably going to light it up. His targets got reduced because of all the weapons, because of Colson Loveland. I bet you he's going to have big-time numbers this year with the Bills, and that's part of the – I have no problem with it. Guess what? Josh is going to force the ball to him. Josh is going to make sure that he's happy, because finally they have somebody that can make a play. But he can put the ball in D.J. Moore's hands, and he can go. He could have 1,000 yards. They'll be like, wow, how can you trade him? He wouldn't have had 1,000 yards in this Bears offense. He's also the king of, like, He gets tackled on a play, and then you think he might be out for the season. Yes. And he's back out on the field two plays later. Tough as shit. Very tough. Tough as shit. He has like nine season-ending injuries every season. Yeah. So you mentioned the Rams, the Trent McDuffie trade, which are the Rams just doing it correctly and we all think about it wrong? That, like, we think about how important first-round picks are, and they have been consistently good. And I know they only have one Super Bowl to show for it, but they've been consistently good. Well, they've got an awesome head coach, and they've got a Hall of Fame quarterback. For sure. But that was also part of that was trading first-round picks. So, fun stat, they drafted Jared Verst in the first round. Yep, in 2024. Before Jared Verst, who was the last guy that the Rams drafted in the first round? Jared Goff. Yes. Has to be. Jared Goff is the last guy that they drafted. But seriously, they basically say, hey, instead of taking a risk on – and I actually think the Jared Verst one, because what was Jared Verst drafted? Was he nine? I can't remember. I know his number is eight. His number is eight. So how I should actually put it is, are the Rams doing it correctly? Not that draft picks don't matter. Draft picks outside of the top ten don't matter as much. Because I think that was the telling thing where Jared Verse, oh, no, he's 19th. So that throws my whole theory out. I just think that if you have Sean McVay and you have Matt Stafford, then you're able to do a lot with that. But they were doing it before then. Yeah. And they also did it to get Matthew Stafford. So it's like they basically have realized. I do. I just am always interested in sports when there's one team that's doing things differently. You know what I mean? Like everyone is trying to hoard draft picks and be like draft, draft, draft. How do you build a team? You get a rookie quarterback on the rookie deal. You have a five-year window. And the Rams seem to be doing the exact opposite where they're like, instead of taking risks on a bunch of 21-year-olds, let's get the known commodity knowing it's a crapshoot and just keep punting that down the line being like, we don't care, we'll just get the really good players that we know are really good players. It's also a very dangerous strategy for teams that don't have their shit together. Yes. Because you'll see the Rams will be successful doing this, and other teams will be like, we should try, the Rams don't care about first-round picks, so now I'm just going to trade for a bunch of veterans every year, and then it's a disaster. I think the difference, too, is that a lot of teams have had these type of trades. I mean, last year, the Green Bay Packers trading for Micah Parsons. So teams take these singular shots at big players. The Rams just do it every year. They don't get scared off by it, yeah. Right. It seems like Les Snead has a formula of every single year, we know how much the rest of the league covets first-round picks. It's maybe the market hasn't corrected. It's overvalued. so we can then go get an awesome player in Trent McDuffie for our first round pick. So 2017, they traded to the Titans to get up and get Jared Goff in the first round. 2018, they traded their first round pick to the Patriots for Brandon Cooks. What pick was that? Don't know. 2018, they traded their first round pick to the Patriots for Brandon Cooks. 2019, they traded their first round pick to the Falcons for more picks, extra picks. 2020 and 2021, both those first-round picks went to the Jaguars for Jalen Ramsey. 2022 and 2023, both those first-round picks went to the Lions with Goff to get Matthew Stafford. And then 2024, they finally used a first-round pick on Jared Goff. Yeah, so here's what the picks would have ended up being. 2017, Corey Davis, he's not in the league anymore, which I always thought he was going to be awesome, Western Michigan. 2018, Isaiah Wynn, he wasn't very good, right? 2019, Kale McGarry. 2020, Chase On. 2021, Travis Etienne. 2022, Louis Seen, who's out of the league, I believe. Yeah. Or maybe he's not, but I know the Vikings moved on from him. Paris Johnson. it seems like whatever teams have picked in the Rams spot have not gotten guys. They just know, yeah, maybe the Rams know, like, hey, the guy that's slotted to us right now actually sucks. It's straight out. I just, I'm always fascinated. Again, you can't say definitively, like, the Rams are doing it better than everyone else because, oh, he's on the Eagles. Or what? He never actually played. Yeah, he never actually played. So that was, but you can't say definitively they're doing it better than everyone else because they only won one Super Bowl. But outside of the one year where the wheels fell off because of injuries, they're in it every year. They're doing something right. They're super competitive. I do think that this is a win-win trade. I think that the Chiefs are happy. Obviously, McDuffie's a great player, but getting back a first-round pick and the other picks that they got for it, too. The Chiefs have a lot of holes. Yeah, and then the Chiefs have to do kind of like a full rebuild, and then the Rams getting a great player while they're still in the Super Bowl win. And still having a first-round pick. And still having the Falcons. Thanks to the Falcons, they've got a great first-round pick. Yeah. Stephon Diggs being cut. Hank? Yeah, money saver. Give him a chance early before free agency. He was a good leader, good player. I guess, I don't know. Sad to see him go. Tough couple weeks. He got engaged, lost the Super Bowl, dumped, fired. That's rough. Yeah. Heart goes out to him. I feel like it's one of those moves that it's probably a fine move as long as you then get someone. You have to get someone. Yeah. And he was in like six days, it was going to be a $6 million hit. Okay. That's why they did it. Yeah. It makes sense. Who do you want besides A.J. Brown? Which, how he has said definitively it's going to cost a one? Yeah, no way the Eagles are trading A.J. Brown unless it's a one, and even then he doesn't think it's likely. Okay. No way. Anything less than a one. They won't do it. According to Adam Schefter. I can pull up the exact quote if you'd like. I wish they would just do all the trades and all the free agent signings in like a one-hour window. Because I don't know. You guys are probably dealing with similar things where your specific team's Twitter fan base. People I follow on Bears Twitter just every night being like, keep your cell phone close. Everybody... Eyeballs emoji. I'm like, is Max Crosby? Is it going to happen? Is it going to happen? Wayne Johnson eyeball emoji. Yeah. To Max Crosby. Yeah. What the fuck was that? Is that tampering? That should be tampering. I don't know what tampering means. But if you're like the ownership, if you are the head coach of the team, you can't reach out and talk to another player. I don't know. I saw that and I immediately bet on Max Crosby, the Eagles on the draft. Big Dom, for example, is not allowed to reach out to Max Crosby as a part owner of the team. Partner. That would be an actionable offense if he did that. I don't believe there's a chance in hell that the Eagles would move A.J. Brown unless it included a first-round pick. Even then, I don't think they're all that interested in moving on from him. That is a quote from Adam Schefter. Schefter's just dropping bombs everywhere. He went on one on Sunday and said that he doesn't think the Bears will get Max Crosby. Okay, womp womp. That sucks. But wouldn't it be very NFL to be like, hey, you know what? The Sunday before conference championship, the Sunday before selection Sunday to this Sunday, from noon till 10 p.m., all signings and trades have to happen, and we just treat it like an NFL Sunday. We sit down and we just maybe make all the GMs be in one room and they have to go up and announce it, and we just sit in and have an NFL Sunday. If they do it like the draft, where you go out on stage and you announce it, and every five minutes there has to be a trade. I do it. NFL will watch. We're signing every five minutes. Yeah. And if there's not, Roger Goodell starts finding you. Yeah. I like the idea of people running to the, like, I'm signing him first. Yes. It would be a spectacle. Imagine just getting juiced up for an NFL Sunday even though they're not playing football. And they have to have at least 10% of the signing bonus in cash in a suitcase that they then award to that. Now we're talking Mr. Beast. Live. Maybe Mr. Beast hosts it. So it's like, you know, who's the biggest free agent signing that's going to be this year? Like, who's – I think iShowSpeed should host it. Nobody knows iShowSpeed. Well, let's just say Max Crosby is a free agent, and they're like – Max Crosby comes up, and Mr. B's standing there. He's like, you just signed a $40 million deal, and with one coin flip, you can double it. That'd be good. And we just play those games. And if my guy actually doesn't try to double it, then I end up not signing it. Yeah, you're like, oh, he doesn't have a dog. Yeah, you don't have that it factor. You don't have belief in yourself. I think Alec Pierce is about to get paid, too. I think the market on Alec Pierce is going to be crazy. Patriot? Possible Patriot. I think he's going to stay with Colts. I think Michael Pittman will get paid. Possible Commander. I think Alec Pierce is going to stay with the – the word is that he and Daniel Jones love each other. I think he likes money, too. And he hasn't gotten paid yet. For sure. So if they're able to offer him, he's going to get paid. I hope he gets paid, too. Yeah. Definitely. For sure. For sure. Okay, any other football-related thoughts? Anything? I got a lot of football-related thoughts. Yeah, we all do. But like anything? All the time. We're going to do our QB rankings for free agents and the next Sam Darnold. But is there anything else? Oh, Miles Garrett got a speeding ticket. Oh, you think? I like that. That's good. That's good. again. Yeah, good for him. Giving back to the community, paying fines in Cleveland. Yeah. He's probably built a school. Like, everyone gives LeBron James all the flowers in the world because he built a school in Cleveland and Miles Garrett has sped enough times to pay for a school and nobody says shit about him. Yeah. Thank you, Miles Garrett, for everything you do in the community. Our guy Ohio State had a funny, he said that Miles Garrett is still trying to get Kirby Smart's attention from Georgia not offering him. Yeah. Just kidding. I think it's his seventh speeding ticket. Mm-hmm. Oof. Stop speeding, Miles Garrett. He probably has really fast cars. Probably really hard. Just be safe. Yeah. Just speed, but do it safely. Yeah. So we have a... There's a debate. There's a debate. That is sparked, like, intensity back here. Okay. I won't say which side anyone is on, but I will ask you the question, Big Cat. You're the only one who has not been prior informed with this question. Okay. Who do you believe is more famous globally? Right now. Right now. Who is more famous globally? I show speed. Donald Trump. Donald Trump. The answer is Donald Trump. What do you guys think? There's no debate to be in there. This is exactly like when we had the debate about John Summitt versus Ludacris. It's not even close. There's one person in this room that believes that I Show Speed is more famous than Donald Trump around the world. How, Zach? I'm just here for fair and impartial debate. I'm not saying one guy thinks one thing, one guy thinks another. I do think that I Show Speed is globally more famous than Donald Trump. How many people do you think in Iran know who I Show Speed is? I think a ton of people in Iran know who Trump is for sure. I think all of them. I think all of them. It's a hot week for Trump and Iran, yes. I think 50 less people than yesterday, don't I? But a lot of people do. That's a super sensitive thing. I mean, that's a great talking point there. I think a lot of people in Iran also know who Aisha Speed is. So I think that if you look around the world, like in the demographic of like 12 to 16 or 12 to 18, so I know like you might be right, but there's a lot more people that are not 12 to 18. I think it's like between the ages of 5 and like 37, it makes up 48% of the globe. And I think an overwhelming majority of them definitely know who's speeding. They also know who Trump is. Yeah, think about America. Every single person in America knows who you're biased because you're American. We're in America. I understand that. And I understand that, but that's a big country. Yeah, that's a huge country. But we're talking the globe. Also, like, they teach Trump in all sorts of schools and talk about him globally as well. Yes, they definitely talk Trump outside of the USA. Right? But for every textbook open talking about Trump, there's a cell phone in the bottom corner with an iShow Speed video on it. But they're not teaching me text books. Not every kid has a cell phone, though. That's true. Not every country has Internet, but the countries without the Internet know Speed, too. But they also... Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. How do you know iShow Speed if you don't have the Internet? So iShow Speed travels to these countries, he'll go live, and you'll see crowds of hundreds of hundreds, if not thousands of people behind him. They know Speed. But I've got some videos... Those are countries that don't have the Internet? They don't have the internet, but they know speed. Or they have dial-up. They have slow internet. You might be winning me over. No, I think everybody in the United States knows Donald Trump. I think half the country of China probably knows Donald Trump. You're also saying that... Australia, Brazil, everybody in Brazil knows Donald Trump. Do you know that Donald Trump is on their cell phones, too? Like, you do the cell phone, textbook thing? Yeah, definitely. Trump's on the phone. Yeah, he's on the phone. Yeah, they're both on phones. They're both on Instagram. Instagram's a terrible metric. Speed does have more followers on Instagram. Bad metric, terrible metric. Terrible metric. He barely does. But Trump also has so many people that hate him. Right. That aren't following him. And so many people that aren't on Instagram that know who he is. Like if Trump has 45 million followers, he probably has 45 million haters. Would we say... But they don't follow him, but they still know him. Speed's profession is social media. No, but what are our thoughts on soccer as a sport? How big is that? It's a big sport. Pretty big. Would we say Cristiano Ronaldo is maybe one of the biggest names in the world? Yeah. Would he compete with Trump? No, because Trump won the first ever FIFA Peace Prize. Yeah. Which is the most prestigious award in soccer. Outside of him taking that trophy to the crib, would we, I mean, Trump, or, Speed's straight out the Ronaldo pipeline. What? If you know the Messi-Ronaldo debate, you know Speed. He's stamped by Cristiano Ronaldo. He created that? No, but he's a figurehead of the Ronaldo debate side in that argument. He is a, he's becoming. Yeah, we would call him a Ronaldo dick rider. Okay. No, he's a colonel in that army. But how does that make him? He's saying that if Ronaldo has, whatever, 200 million fans, then Speed has 200 million fans, but it's more like... Ronaldo's got way more than 200 million fans. But still, he's saying that that all goes to Speed, which it's not. I'm just saying, if you know Ronaldo, there's a 95% chance he knows. No. I think so. I think there's a lot of old people that know Ronaldo that have no idea what streaming is. Oh, definitely. I think, well, Speed transcends streaming. How? He's an athlete. No, he's streaming it. But he's streaming that. He's not an athlete. He's like a pretty good, he's pretty athletic. He's a very athletic guy as far as guys go. People don't know him as an athlete that don't stream. There's no one's like, oh, I show speed. Is he an athlete? No, they're like, he's a streamer who does athletics. I think he might be an athletic guy with a cam on, too. You could look at it both ways. But he's not like Ronaldo where it's like if you watch sports, you know who Ronaldo is. If you watch sports, you don't know who I show speed is. I think if you watch soccer, you know speed. No. A lot of soccer fans do. But if you watch soccer, you know who Aaron Trump is. If you're doing a pre-show for the World Cup, will we consider that a big sporting event? Yeah. If they're doing pre-shows for World Cup, they're inviting speed. Trump was literally invited. He was at the FIFA opening center. He was at the Trump Kennedy Center. Was he? The first ever. I think you're kind of forgetting this part, Zach. Yes. He is the first and only recipient of the FIFA Peace Prize for accomplishments in the field of peace. That's good to know that FIFA is familiar with Trump and speed. Yeah. That's huge for both of them. Like I said, Trump's a huge name. He's a global name, right? What I'm hearing, though, is that if Trump decided to start streaming, he could put up some numbers. AI says Donald Trump is significantly more well-known than I should. I do feel like that's American AI you're looking at on American Internet. Is that Grock? Is that Grock? No, I'm using Microsoft Co-Pilot. It says significantly, significantly more well-known. You guys familiar with anime or manga? I'm familiar with those words. So One Piece is a manga series, the biggest manga series of all time as far as sales goes. He bridges the gap between soccer and manga, soccer and anime. Okay. I was just talking about two massive audiences at all no speed. Okay, Trump kind of bridges the two massive audiences of the nation of the United States and the nation of China, and also the nation of India. And also everybody in India knows him too. Yeah, he's huge. Trump's huge. Do you think who knows Trump more if you go Mexico? Okay. Do more Mexicans know Trump or I should speak? I think a lot of people in Mexico know both of them for sure. I don't think so. Oh, did you? We're in. What? I think someone who knows Trump just passed away. And some... Oh, and a kid just clicked a speed video. Oh, okay. Oh, you're kidding. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The demographic's changing. Got it. Ever-changing. Got it. Got it. Oh, wait. Oh, I got an update. A kid just passed away because he was looking at his phone. He got hit by a car while watching an iShowSpeeds video. Rest in peace. Yeah, it's really sad. Maybe we'll reach out to speed and see if he covers the funeral. Woody? I have no idea. Who do you think... Canada. In Canada, who knows Trevor Spiegel? I'm trying to find the... This is not a touchscreen. My bad. What are we looking for? Canada. This is crazy, Zach. It is crazy. Zach, do you think you have a bias? You are a streamer? Oh, no. I think Trump is huge. I think Trump's massive. Right. I'm just saying that. Well, he's the same way as Lamar Jackson. Is Trump bringing out this kind of crowd in Kenya? These are people on the streets every age. This demo is everywhere. How much of that is a crowd of iShowSpeed fans? How much of it is it started as a few people and then they're like, oh shit, a crowd? I think this is like, oh my goodness, speeds in Kenya, speeds transcends streaming. The demo of people in this crowd right now age between 12 and 55. Zach, do you? 12 and 75. But this is a country that has, like Kenya has the internet. They're a developed country that has access to the internet everywhere. Yes, I just want to show some crowd work, some boots on the ground. Okay. This is just Speedgo and Ronaldo's house. You're making it sound like we're Speed haters, which I don't want to put myself in that camp. I don't want to sound like I'm just trashing the guy. No, I don't think you're a hater whatsoever. We're just talking numbies. Yeah, just directly from the data. What do his videos get? How many watches? Give me an average watch. A quick pull? Yeah. What's his main thing? Is he on YouTube? What is he on? He's got 37,000 people watching him right now. You have 30,000 people watching you do fucking fast food eating on Tuesday. Yeah, we were eating the Doug Doug. That's fair, but this is just him kicking in his bedroom with his brother. You guys did assemble the Avengers. Who? It was a good group. It was not the Avengers. It felt like the Avengers. I enjoyed watching that from home. I was really envious. That was so much fun. YouTube's not his number one platform. It's Twitch, right? I would say YouTube's probably the biggest platform ever. Oh, so then this is a blowout. Come on What were the final views on one of his streams On his last stream 3 million That's incredible numbers Incredible numbers Come on Zach Incredible numbers but come on I think globally It's a little bit skewed here in the United States I don't think that you understand that people know who Donald Trump is Outside of America You know what you are you're wowed by the fact that there's like a crowd in Kenya for speed or a crowd in China for speed. Those are massive countries. Yeah, that's true. We're talking Zambia, Indonesia, every country in South America. Yeah. We're just talking globally, yeah. But like if Trump rolled up to India like tomorrow and he was wearing the outfit, he was out there with Modi. And he's like, I'll race anyone. Yeah, but a crowd too. Massive crowd. But that's the thing. It's not even, it's just people. He has so many haters as well. But those people also know him. They know who he is. They won't show up in the crowd, but it's like, oh, yeah, I know Donald Trump. Everyone knows Donald Trump. Trump's huge. Speed might just edge him out just a little bit. Like, Trump's so big. Trump sells shoes, watches. But it's in the tiny, like, you're not talking blowout. No, it's, oh, speed beats him out fractionally. Let me ask you this. Has speed ever had any success, like, selling a Bible? Spoken word, I don't know speed gets in that bag. Has he ever had any success? Like, has he started a university? University, not sure. How many buildings is Speed's name on it? Again, not sure if he's on any architecture at all. I don't know if he sells shoes or watches either. Trump does both of those things. Stakes, too. He is good at playing to the core. I think Speed's core might be bigger. Oh, here's an article that hurts your case. There's a lot of those. April 13, 2025. Internet icon Speed meets Chinese celebrity Trump impersonator. All the people who were watching Speed that day were like, that's Trump. Wait, wait. Do you think that Donald Trump would ever hang out with a Speed impersonator? I don't know. They did invite Speed to the White House. Maybe Adderall. He'd hang out with Adderall. No, I don't think that that's, I think, Big Cat. He was in your argument that that's Trump's house. Yeah, but I think he went on his third invite. You were like, yeah, they invited Speed to Trump's house. that makes Speed more famous than Trump. Yeah, he's just checking out his house. I think that might have been the second or third invite. I don't think he won on the first one. I like that you're taking the take. I need more Zach takes. These are good takes to just throw out there, whether it be right or wrong. This one is very wrong. The takes is part of my take. If I were to guess, I would say that I think 3 billion people know who Donald Trump is. Yeah. Maybe 4 billion. Maybe 4 billion. Maybe more. I think Speed might have 4.1, dude. 4.1 billion. I'll give you 4.1 just for sake of argument. That's so many. Do you know how many millions that is? All of them? That's like 4,000 millions. It just happened again, too. Oh, somebody else died? Yeah, it did. Taylor Swift is bigger than ICSD. Why do you keep killing Trump supporters right now, Zach? What's up? It sounds like you're just taking joy and announcing that. No, no, not Trump supporters. Whatsoever. I'm not even pro-death. where your fucking dad is. Zach, Taylor Swift is bigger than I Show Speed. Yes, Taylor Swift is bigger than Speed. Globally, music transcends everything. Taylor Swift is pretty big. She is. Taylor Swift is pretty big. But also, it's just like, Travis Kelsey is also big. It's a tough, like, those numbers are skewed. Taylor Swift is far more globally famous than I Show Speed when you look at overall reach. We might just be early here. could have just happened again. Is iShowSpeed... Not wrong, just thoroughly. Is iShowSpeed even the most famous streamer? Yeah, who's... Do Mr. Beast. Or just any streamer. Just to you the most famous streamer. Mr. Beast is the most famous person in the world, I think. Mr. Beast is outside of this argument. He's the biggest in the world. They transcribe his videos in 60 different languages. He does. Yeah, I know. He's got a team. Mr. Beast is an entity. We could do that and say we're... We transcribe our podcast. MrBeast has become the lottery for the world. Kysenet is the biggest streamer. Kysenet has a stream to five months. He's out here like Zambia. You know what I mean? Just levels. XQC? No, XQC is super niche, super niche. What about Ninja? As far as globally, XQC is massive, though. He's massive. Okay. Ninja, I like his takes on kickers. Yeah, Ninja just talks lines with his brother now. Okay. Yeah. They just play no build and they just talk lines. Paul? Good try, Zach. To watch? Good try, good effort. We can agree Trump and speed both huge, right? Yes. No, actually, I'm going to say speed's huge, Trump's massive. Both massive. It's one have more time to increase and one has less time. I guess infamy? I don't know. How does this work? Zach, it sounds like you have a parasocial relationship with iShowSpeed. No, we're talking data. Are you in the chat for iShowSpeed? I'm in a lot of chats, PFT. What are you commenting on the iShowSpeed? I've been in the chat. I'm not using a speed chat, no. Give me an example of one thing that you have commented in iShowSpeedChat. I don't think I have a chat log in speed chat. I don't believe you. I just see the clips on speed. Okay. Okay. But you're a diehard speed fan. No, no. Are you a speed freak? We're talking data today. Okay. Okay. It sounds like you're personally attached. No, no. A little bit. Trump's massive. A little bit. Trump's huge. But he sells watches. Just a little bit less than his shoes. He sells watches. Just a little bit less than his shoes. Wait, Trump. Oh, yeah, the shoes. I forgot about that. The shoes, yeah. The guys are sick. Yeah. Okay. Let's hit an ad real quick, and then we're going to do some QB. Good job, Zach. We'll do some QB rankings, and then we have Roger Bennett. DraftKings, there's only one UFC, 326 this Saturday on DraftKings Sportsbook, the number one sportsbook for live betting. Once it's over, your shot to get in on the action is gone. DraftKings Sportsbook is built for live betting, not just pre-fight picks, because in the UFC, one moment can flip the entire fight, one punch, one kick, one takedown. New to DraftKings, new customers can bet $5 and get $200 in bonus bets if your bet wins with code TAKE. Download the DraftKings coursework app. Use code TAKE. That's code TAKE for new customers to turn $5 into $200 in bonus bets if your bet wins in partnership with DraftKings. The crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. New York? Call 877-8-HOPE-N-Y or text HOPE-N-Y. Connecticut? Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org. On behalf of Boothill Casino in Kansas, Wager tax pass-through may apply in Illinois. 21 and over in most states. Void in Ontario. Restrictions apply. Bet must win to receive bonus bets which expire in seven days. Minimum odds required. For additional terms or responsible gaming resources, see dkng.co slash audio. Limited time offer. I'd say this is the last show we're going to have for three weeks where there's not a ton going on because we're right before free agency. I call this the spring bump. Yeah, we're right before free agency. We were right before March Madness in the tournament. And then, yeah, then we're off and running, actually. I actually might take that back. This might be the last year. It's the last year. There's not a lot to talk about until, like, July. I'll tell you why. I think legal tampering starts on Monday. Yeah, legal tampering. So right now we're in the thick of illegal tampering season. Correct. Which is the new legal tampering. Max Crosby, hopefully, going to be traded at some point. Everyone's getting tampered with. Did you read that article in The Athletic that Michael Silver wrote? I did. So there's some interesting stuff in that article. It's interesting. Basically, it said, like Max Crosby, his only crime, well, two things. One, his only crime is that he tries too hard. He practices too hard. And he's sick of practicing on teams that won't allow him to practice super hard. He hits quarterbacks in practice, which is against the rules. But I think if he was playing on a team with a good quarterback, he'd probably be less likely to hit them. Correct. That would be a guess. And then the other really interesting part, Tom Brady, he's the announcer on Fox. He's done a great job improving his game on Fox in terms of color analysts recently. He's also a part owner of the Las Vegas Raiders. And I think he owns, what, 4% of the team? Something like that. But Mark Davis has pretty much given him, like, act like you own the entire team. He is the shadow president of football. It's a soft benching on Mark Davis' part. He's soft benching himself. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And so since Tom Brady's got that full-time job working with Fox. Have you read this article? Do you know where we're going with this? I'm waiting. Okay. Okay, so Tom Brady, former quarterback for the New England Patriots. He's working with Fox, like, full time, so he can't be at practice all the time. He can't be at the facility. Wait, if he can't be at the facility, he's PFT. Who is at the facility for him, Hank? Do you want to guess? Like a surrogate for him. I don't know. Someone probably, like, a trainer or something. Yeah. Maybe, yeah. Like, pretty much a doctor. Basically a doctor. Yeah, basically a doctor. Alex Guerrero is his eyes and ears. The story that Michael Silver wrote, Alex Guerrero just keeps popping up. What's wrong with that? What's the, like? Because nobody really trusts Alex Guerrero. And no one really knows what he does, and essentially he goes to the practice and narcs to Tom Brady and also tells people they're getting cut or their job is at stake, but he's not an owner. He's not a coach. He just is. He sounds messy. He sounds like a messy bitch. He is a messy bitch. He gets the news from Tom, and he's like, oh, I got some gossip. He sits down with Mark Davis. He's like, Mark, you want the tea? What part of this is not weird to you? What do you mean? What do you mean? Is Alex Garrow making decisions, or is he just watching practice? He's kind of everything. He's announcing. Everything and nothing all at once. He's announcing decisions. Like, if you're an owner of a team and you can't be there, wouldn't you want someone that you trust to be there? Like, that's reasonable, right? Yeah, the other owners. Is that not reasonable? Yeah, or the coach or the GM. Yeah, all these other guys. Guys who, like, worked in football their entire lives. Guerrero's been around football for a while. Listen, Guerrero's been kicked out of more facilities than you and I have ever been admitted to. That's true. He's, yeah, he does sound messy, though. But it was part of the frustration is Alex Guerrero's just walking around being like, like basically I heard Tom doesn't like you taking notes had the note pen out he's like if the Raiders were good that's just clicks that's just Mike Silver wants clicks oh if the Raiders were good that would not be an issue I think that like the issue is that the Raiders fucking suck and that's why Max Crosby wants to be out the reason Max Crosby wants to be out is not because of that's actually not true Max Crosby wants to be out because he was benched last year as the Raiders were trying to tank and he's such a competitor that he thought that was like the ultimate sin against competition and everything that he stands for Let me ask you a question Hank If there was someone here who Now Austin is here now but let say Dave hired someone who has no idea how the blog game works. And he has no idea how podcasting works. He has no idea how the content game works. We've hired people like that. Okay, hold on, hold on. Yes, we do have a lot of people like that over time. But let's say that that's Dave's eyes and ears. And you don't really have a relationship with this person. And every time you're at the golf simulator, or every time you take two sandwiches on free lunch Tuesday, I know it was you. I didn't get any sandwiches. Every time you do that. Shane did? Yeah. Shane took two? Yeah. Before anyone else got one? I was the one that was trying to get the tapes released. By the time I got there, there was one shitty sandwich left. I almost got some tapes released on Hank yesterday. Oh. But I'm admitting that I could see the error of my ways potentially, so I didn't. I want to hear that, but let me just further this and then I want to hear the tapes. But let's just say you're on the golf simulator and this guy walks up and has a notepad and he goes, Huh. Okay. And then walks away, takes a note. And then Dave, you know, like maybe a week later is like, oh, Hank, all he does is golf. You would like that guy to be around the facility? That's basically what you do. Okay. I just had an analogy he's in the hitting. I need some help. No, basically, Tom has his eyes and ears and acting as a surrogate. And I think people are, if you read between the lines of what Michael Silver wrote, it seems like there's a lot that he did not write. There's a lot more that he can write about this relationship. Think about the stuff he didn't write. Yeah. I want to talk about that. I mean, Michael Silver's a vet. He knows that Tom Brady gets clicks. He's the Florio special. The employer did write aggregate Michael Silvers. Right, and I'm sure Tom Brady was somehow the lead focus of the article. What do you shake your head? Yeah, the athletic just preys on these bad teams. Either way, it is weird that they write so many articles that paint bad teams in a bad light. Yeah, it's bad. I do like that Max Crosby is like, I'm not going to publicly ask for a trade out of respect to the Raiders fans. even though then this article gets written that's basically saying I want out. Yeah, I'm going to publish all the blackmail that I have on the Raiders. It's great. It'll be a slow drip that comes out over the spring. What was the tapes you almost released on Hank? No, no. So Hank was somewhat vindicated, but what happened yesterday, we had a nice lunch that was catered for the office. It was delicious. And I went, I got in line, and I'm waiting my turn in line, and there's a group of people that are in front of me picking their sandwiches out, and I'm waiting to have my turn to select my sandwich. The people leave. I'm looking down at my phone, so I'm walking at a very slow pace. But then Hank, who was standing right behind me, just passes me on my left. You cut him. Cuts in line right in front of me, gets the sandwich the very last of the good sandwiches. And then he keeps walking, and then I just look around like, did that just happen right now? So then I went, I got the tapes, I reviewed the tapes. in Hank's defense I was looking at my phone and moving slowly in the line which is why I did not release the tapes it might have been a situation where just a simple like hey you can move hey they're done getting their sandwich like one of those, like a little nudge would have helped like a little tap on the horn when you're behind you want me to hold your hand that's why I didn't release the tapes I would like to see the tapes but it does sound like you had bad line etiquette I did, I did I think if there's room in the middle It's like if somebody's at a red light, the light turns green for about a full second. And instead of just like giving them a boop, you just like speed around them, flip them off. But then roll coal in their face. Yeah. And then eat their sandwich. That would also be on you. Then eat their sandwich. So it was, it was. If the light goes green and you don't move, like, what are you doing? Yeah, it was at least 51%. You should have beeped. It was 51%. 51% my fault. I'll take the line and share the responsibility. Wow, that's huge of you. Yeah, 51%. Hank, you can have 4% like Alex Guerrero. It'd be fun. But yeah, there was also no sandwiches left, so I was... It was like, if there was a bunch of sandwiches, I might have been like, hey, but it was like, oh, shit. Oh, so it did factor in your mind that you wanted the last good sandwich. No, it didn't. I would like to be the same. That's literally what you did. No, but I'm just saying, like, if there was, there was, like, literally two sandwiches left in the entire board, because Shane ate them all. What did you pull up here, Zach or Matt? I was... I didn't mean to pull that up. Oh, you were just looking at Alex Guerrero. Yeah, I was just searching... Alex Guerrero's a weird guy. Now, for the record, I would retract everything. Yeah, no, for sure. He's a weird guy. He is a weird guy. And I think he's a weird guy. But I do think it's like, again, it's like Tom Brady's greatest quarterback of all time. Love of my life. Greatest person I've ever known or never wished to know. What? He's also kind of a weird guy. Right, but I. But Alex Guerrero did take him to the next level. Okay. What Alex Guerrero did for Tom Brady's career, it makes sense that Tom Brady trusts him so much. And if you're Tom Brady and you're not able to be at practice, you want someone that you can trust to be there. So it's like, yeah, he's a weird guy, but Tom Brady's a weird guy, and it's like it makes sense that he. Tom Brady has earned his weirdness, though. When Tom Brady, you see him being weird, you're like, but he's a winner. Alex Guerrero, you see him being weird, and you're like, who is this guy again? I mean, that's uncomfortable to have eyes and ears, a weird guy, eyes and ears, walking around the practice. But, again, put yourself in Brady's position. Yeah. Who else would you want there? Who else would you have there? Alex Earl. Yeah, no. I'm just throwing out names. I mean, it's a Jordan situation. It's a little bit of a Jordan situation. What are you talking about? It's a little bit of a Jordan situation. How? How? How? How? How? How? If you're thinking a wonder lick right now, it would be Jordan is to Belichick as Alex Guerrero is to... I said those exact words behind this booth to Zach at the start of this conversation. That makes no sense. Zero sense. It's going on without the crazy good sex. Do you think Alex Guerrero is in charge of doing Adobe Photoshop for Tom Brady? No. He's a trainer. I think he's just the jack of all trades. I think it's just like... Pliability. Max has never heard of that. Oh! That's good. Actually, Max is... Max is flexible. Super flexible. Max is one of the... He's by far the most flexible on the podcast. You know who's very pliable? Somebody that does adult competitive cheerleading. Mm-hmm. Good point. Alex Guerrero is a cheerleader. It's insane. Absolutely insane. He's a great cheerleader. Like, you're doing great, Tom. Good job. Keep on not eating those tomatoes. I bet you he knows some shit about peptides. Probably does. He probably does. And listen, I will say that if he comes on this podcast, I would listen to whatever fake medical advice he gave me. I love fake doctors. Yeah, but he's a fake doctor. That's the important part. He's a trainer. To not say he's a real doctor. He's a trainer. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. We're going to do our list. We have a list. We're going to make a list of top quarterback free agents. I think we should make two lists. One is top quarterback free agents. One is top quarterbacks that might be on the move. Okay. That's like the Kyler, the Geno, that group. So let's start with top quarterback free agents. This is going to be the, pardon my take, official Bible, because we know that there are certainly some scouts and maybe possibly GMs that listen to this show. So if you want to just take this, Scouts and GMs. Guys that you can sell yourself on. We will be fully on board. All right, here's the list. I'm going to give you the list. It's obviously longer than this, but this is the list that I've come up with, and then we can sort it through. Aaron Rodgers, Russell Wilson, Marcus Mariota, Zach Wilson, Tyrod Taylor, Joe Flacco, Kenny Pickett, Jimmy G, Mitch, and Phil Rivers. Where do we want to start? Who's the 1-1 on this list? Is Russell Wilson on there? Russell Wilson is on there. Is it also Malik Willis? Malik Willis is, yes, so he's number one. Malik Willis, my number one. Daniel Jones, technically. Mario Tuck. Daniel Jones with a transition tag. Yeah, a team can offer him a bag. All right, Malik Willis won. I like that a lot. I think that makes sense. I think you got to go Phil Rivers, too. Right? Who would you rather have, Zach Wilson or Phil Rivers? Although, I'm still, I'm not done with Zach Wilson. You're still bleeding? Still believing in Zach Wilson. I mean, he got Quindy Aragwe edging him out last year. I mean, who would you want for this next year? Aaron Rodgers. If you want a winner, there's one obvious pick. Trey Lance. Nope. Who? Jimmy G. Jimmy G? He wins football games. He's been to more Super Bowls than anyone in the history of the league. It is kind of weird how Jimmy Garoppolo just kind of... That's not true. Kind of stopped being a starter. More Super Bowls than anyone in the league. He went from going to Super Bowls. It's a lot of Super Bowls. How many Super Bowls has he been to? I think like seven. Has he actually? He's been to a lot. I guess the streets are saying he's a Cardinal. Yeah, because Michael Floor was this guy from the Rams, so that would make sense. Jimmy G's Super Bowl appearances. Jimmy G on the streets at Scottsdale would be a weapon. He's played in one, right? He's played in one. And he was in the 2015 and 2017. Max is looking it up. Back up. How many times does he have? Back up on a Super Bowl. Max, just go to his Wikipedia and you can just see how many rings he has. But we need appearances. Yeah, I know. But then you just add in the Eagles loss in the 49ers. But he's lost the Super Bowl because the Patriots have lost a lot of Super Bowls. How many does he have? He has three. So he's probably been to five, right? The Eagles lost. And then the loss of the Niners quarterback. Oh, wait. And he was with the Rams. He wasn't with the Rams when they went to the Super Bowl. Was he? No. He was with the Rams in 2024. Yeah, so he was not with the Super Bowl. So five. So close to the most ever. Decent amount of Super Bowls. More Super Bowls than a lot of people. A pretty good. That's a fact. In terms of people who have ever lived, he's up there. All right, so we want to put him three? I think it goes Malik Willis, Aaron Rodgers, Jimmy G. I think I would maybe go Tyrod number three. No, not as a starter. Over Jimmy G? Yeah, I think I'd rather have Jimmy G. He's been to more Super Bowls than anyone in the history of the game. What about Mariotta? I like Mariotta. Listen, Mariotta is a great backup quarterback. Yeah, I think Mariotta over Tyrod. Yeah, I think Marcus Mariotta. No way. Did you see that Falcons game? He might be the number one backup quarterback. All right. Here's what I have right now. You can tell me if we want to switch anything. I have Malik Willis, one. Aaron Rodgers, two. Jimmy G, three. Mario Ta, four. Tyrod, five. I think this is where you've got to put in Joe Flacco and Phil Rivers. Mm-hmm. Okay. Flacco, Phil Rivers. Then the question is Mitch. But there should also be a caveat on this, that if we're talking about a one-game replacement midseason at the last second, Joe Flacco's number one. Rivers. Rivers would be good too, but he didn't win. Yeah, it's true. But you need Flacco on four days' notice, and he will go out there, he will give you a win. Okay. Here's what I have for the whole list, if we're filling it out, and you guys tell me if you want to switch anything. We have Malik Willis, one. Tell me, just say something if you don't like where they're at. Malik Willis, one. Aaron Rodgers, two. Jimmy G, three. Mary Ota, four. Tyrod, five. Joe Flacco 6 Phil Rivers 7 Mitch 8 Kenny 9 Zach Wilson 10 Russell Wilson 11 Wentz 12 Gotta put Wentz No he's gotta go above Russ I would put him 12 I'd personally have him 12 on my list I have him 10 We should put Wentz 12 Brett Favre 13 Wait so we're not including Kyler No this is his second list If Kyler has not been released yet, he will be released. He shall be released. All right, so let's do the second list. I feel like that was a good list right there. The second list, the names that we could have. So this is names that are possibly being traded, released, whatever it may be, but they're currently on a team. Kyler Murray, Tua, Derek Carr, Mac Jones, Anthony Richardson, Tanner McKee, Spencer Rattler, Geno Smith. Let's talk it out. Kyler, Tua. Kyler won. Matt Jones? Matt Jones is under. Yeah, but he could be traded. That's what I'm saying. Like, there's rumors. I think Matt Jones is the next Donald. I think there's going to be four different teams that talk themselves hard into Kyler Murray. We actually. And the matter of fact is, Kyler Murray, if he goes to the Rams and chooses to be a backup with Sean McVay and stick around there, Kyler Murray is going to go into the Hall of Fame. So that's just how this is going to work out. Sean McVay is going to be like, I got my guy for the next 10 years. We'll win one more Super Bowl with Matt Stafford. Then it's Kyler. He'll be back to being elite again. But if he goes anywhere else, I think it's dicey. So this list actually should technically just be the next Sam Darnold. That should be the name of this list. Okay. Next Sam Darnold. Next Sam Darnold. Because I got another one for you. Kyler Murray on there. What? Anthony Richardson. No, he's on the list. Yeah, yeah. So Kyler's one. You want to do Mac Jones or Anthony Richardson two? You like Mac Jones next Sam Darnold? I like Mac Jones one. Okay. And then... Booth, you want to break the tie? Mac Jones or Anthony Richardson? Or sorry, Mac Jones or Kyler Murray? Next Sam Darnold. Okay, all right. He's too small. I would rather have Kyler. Mac Jones is two. Anthony Richardson three? Yeah. That arm. Anthony Richardson three. That arm don't quit. Daniel Jones, he could be on that list too. Where is he going to go? Who? Anthony Richardson. I don't know. But he could be the next Sam Darnold. He could. He could be better than Sam Darnold. I think Geno 4? Is it possible for Geno to be the next Sam Darnold if he was before Sam Darnold? Yeah, I mean, he's got – they share a couple teams too. Because it's like Sam Darnold might have been the next Geno. Yeah, but he took it to the next level. No, but then he became – it becomes, it takes out the Geno. Then he becomes the first Sam Darnold. Right. And then now we're looking for the next guy. All right, so Geno for Derek Carr. Memes. Sadder Jets signing. Derek Carr or Tua? Oh, that's a good debate. I think Tua helps. Derek Carr's better, but it would be such a bummer just in general. But the Jets haven't had an interception in a while, so Tua helps that in practice. Oh, true. Good point. Okay. Good point. Scout team picks. Derek Carr kills your wide receivers. So, I think Tua. Oh, Justin Fields should be in this list, too. Tua? Yeah, I think Tua would be the sadder. Okay. All right, so I'm going to throw Justin Fields in there. I got another one. Yeah. Deshaun Watson. Think about it. But he was already – I don't think he can be eligible just because he was good at one point, like really good. He was very good at one point. Okay, how about Kyle Trask? Kyle Trask could be the next Sam Donald. He's got to make a team. Meem said this. I keep telling him to say it in the mic, Will Levis. Oh, good one. Let's go Will Levis. Five. Okay. And then two – all right, I'm going to read this off to you guys. You tell me. I'm taking out Tanner McKee and I'm taking out Derek Carr just because they don't really apply to the next Sam Darnold. Tanner McKee wasn't a high draft pick. Derek Carr was good. Here's the next Sam Darnold list we got. One, Kyler Murray. Two, Mac Jones. Three, Anthony Richardson. Four, Geno Smith. Five, Will Levis. Six, Justin Fields. Seven, two. I feel good about that list. I think we're going to get a Sam Darnold out of that list. There's going to be one. I feel like Geno's not on that list either. Yeah, Geno, I don't think he counts on that list. Okay, I'll take him out. I would remove him for that list. Okay. I mean, Tua's had good years. Does Malik Willis count on that list? Yeah, Tua's also. No, Malik Willis, no. Because he's also a free agent, so we're going to... Yeah, but he was good. We do a bad job of our list. It's really just, once we make the graphic, it'll look good. Yeah, for sure. All right, one more name for the next him. Josh Johnson. What if this is the year for Josh? Ooh. What about... You might put it all together. How about this? Seven on this list should be Sam Darnold for those that still don't believe in Sam Darnold. He can do it, yeah. Right. Like, he could still be the next Sam Darnold. Yeah. This is the year where Sam Darnold can get himself off the list of guys like Trent Dilfer and get himself onto the list of guys like Aaron Rodgers or Ben Roethlisberger. Yeah. Okay. Well, that's fun list making. Yeah. What else we got? Max, we were talking briefly before the show. Are you getting nervous about the bubble? The bubble. If Villanova lost last night, I would have been nervous about the bubble. But now I think we're firmly good. Firmly, firmly good. Firm good. Firm. Something hit me last night in the Badgers game. One, obviously Nolan Winter getting hurt was not good, and that seems to happen. Johnny Davis or Chucky Hepburn late in the season. Two, we really, the NIL and transfer portal, which is a lot of hand-wringing, losing the true senior day moment sucks. Because Isaac Gard, Greg Gard's son hit a three and it was electric. Electric moment. That is nice. You don't have as many of those moments of guys that have been there for a really long time and stayed at one school because everyone's transferred. Yeah, the moms walking out on the court with just the biggest button that you've ever seen on their sweatshirt. The roses. That is a nice moment. It was nice. It was nice. So I think we've lost that a little bit, and we need it. I saw some tweet yesterday. I can't find it. But I think there's like 24 seniors that participated in senior games this year. Oh, you got it? There are only 22 high major scholarship players who will celebrate senior night this week having played at just one place. That's pretty crazy. That's insane. That's good. How many? Out of how many schools? Yeah, a lot. Like 60. SEC has one. One singular senior who stayed for the whole time. That's nuts. I like my idea of if you stay out of school, if you don't transfer, you get an additional year of eligibility. Or you get, you know what? You just get a PhD. Automatic. That's awesome. You don't have to go to class. You just get a PhD. You're just a doctor. Dr. Marshall Henderson. That would be great. Yeah. Yeah, Dr. Isaac Gard. He might be here this week. Yeah. This week. Yeah, I know, right? Yeah. Howdy toddy. There's an interesting debate. We can embrace debate if you'd like to. I have one more college basketball than I want to embrace the debate. The last college basketball, credit to Bruce Pearl because he has been, you know, the thing that he said about Miami of Ohio over this weekend, everyone coming after him. He did have a quote that I appreciate. He said, am I rooting for my son to make the NCAA tournament? Of course I am. Did I help my son get the Auburn job? Nepotism? Of course I did. Credit to him. He just went out and admitted it. Because I didn't know. I was kind of 50-50. Like, how did this guy, how did Steven Pearl get this job? And why is Bruce Pearl so enamored with Auburn this year? And then he was like, hey, guys, that's actually my son, and I got him the job. That's why I'm rooting for him. That's, I think his hand was a little bit, like, there's no chance that he could ever say anything besides that. It was so obvious that he was like, listen, they got me dead to rights. Yeah, fuck. They got me. You know what? I can't fight this one. I got to take a plea deal. They're sniffing around. Yeah. They're starting to connect too many dots. Yep, they got me. But, yeah, that was – and, yeah, we started Conference Championship Week. We have the Long Island University, the Shark Fin. Did you guys see Fin's Up? Yeah, I like Fin's Up. It's not electric. I used to go to games there. So it's in Brooklyn. Long Island University? It's a mile from my old apartment in Dumbo. So I used to take my son to those games. You can just walk in. It's free. And I'm so mad I miss Fin's Up. Shout out Fin's Up. because for people who didn't see it, Long Island University has a gym that looks like a ice. They're the Dolphins? Yes, I believe so. That makes no sense. No, they're the Sharks. Sharks. We're the Sharks. I think they're the Dolphins and the Sharks. They kind of look like the Nick Nolte fake team from Blue Chips. Yeah. I thought that was, I didn't know what that was. They're the Sharks. When I saw the gym, I was like, what is this? So, yeah, it's a gym that is smaller than most high school gyms. You can just walk right in, and then they are in, at the time you're listening to this, they might have been eliminated, but I think they're in the semifinals of the NEC, and they have a new thing at the free throw line where their fan base yells, and then everyone goes like the safety symbol, and it's like six people. I was going to say, by fan base, it's like the size of the roster. Careful, careful. Probably the hardest place to play in the country. They bring in intensity in that gym. Hank, I'd like to see you go. I bet you couldn't go four for ten from the line in that gym. Easily. You almost went to this school? Well, it used to be LIU Brooklyn and LIU Post, and then they merged into one school. Ah. But I was talking to the LIU Brooklyn baseball coach for a while about potentially going. It is a very funny color scheme and nickname because this school is in downtown Brooklyn, essentially. Like, downtown Brooklyn. Like, it's not too far from where the Nets play and having a turquoise shark. Like, it seems like this should be a team that's playing in Southern California. It does. It does. But I love them. The fins up guy is intimidating as fuck. Fins up. Yep. Bang. It is electric. Got him. You can hear the fins reverberating off the back wall. It's so good. It's so good. I'm mad that I never got to fins up. Yeah. So it's a new thing. Did this guy start to come up? I don't know. I took my son to a couple games. One of the games, the vibe at these games are so lax, and like I said, it doesn't cost to get in there, that one of the games where I said it was probably like two and a half, he was essentially like sitting in the coach's lap by the end of the game. He had gone all the way up and was on the court because just like whatever. It's great. Fins up. Shout out to Fins up crew. We're big fans. I love them. I hope they get in the tournament. We'll be fins-upping the whole time. Okay, so what was your embrace debate? Embrace debate. This was actually discussed this morning on, I believe it was on First Take, but Stephen A. Smith and Jay Williams got into it. So I'm curious, honestly, to hear your take on this question. It's regarding the NBA. Okay. Are the Boston Celtics Jalen Browns or Jason Tatum's team? Discuss. Discuss amongst yourselves. I can give points for either side if you'd like some cheat sheets. Whose team do you think they are? I think they're Joe Mazzullo's team. That was not the option. Celtics-Browns or are they Tatum's team? I don't understand the question. You need five players on the court at all times. Yeah, but I guess another way to think about this is, like, who's Batman and who's Robin? But that's two people out of five. Yeah, well, there's also Batgirl. There's like Justice League. You got Alfred. If we're talking Justice League, then it's like, who's your favorite superhero, you know? Right. And Pitcher's the Flash. Right, so when, like, the Patriots win all those Super Bowls, you could say it's Tom Brady's team, right? Tom Brady was a quarterback. You could say it was Bill Belichick's team. Okay. It really depends which way you're talking about. I just thought it was an interesting new twist on a debate that I hadn't heard before. What do you think, PFT? I think it's a ridiculous concept for a debate, and I think it's beneath the integrity of the show to even discuss it. But you're entertaining it, which makes me think that... No, I'm just trying to get a clarification. Is there a date for Jason Tate to come back? No, we're just on injury report watch. Okay. They said, what is it, 314? I think it's Peyton Pritchard. Did you guys see SGA's outfit? but I have to assume he was doing this as a troll, and I loved it. He looked like, yeah, I've got one of those zip-up ones. Like the one-piece ones? It's a great coat. It's a great coat. It's a great coat. But him doing the interview in that coat was even funnier, where it's like you can't even see him talking. I think you only are able to do that if you win MVP. If he was, like, second place last year, I don't think you can wear that coat. All right, so Carmelo Anthony says Jason Tidham needs to be very mature when he returns knowing it's Jalen Brown's team this season. I actually agree with this team. I agree with that. This season, it is Jalen Brown's team. Yeah. You can't come in midstream and be like, hey, it's going to be exactly the same. And also, Jalen's going to come back from the Achilles. Going forward, it might change, but this season, it's Jalen Brown's. I agree with that. I mean, in the episode of his last comeback episode, it was like, you know, I ain't coming back to be a role player, but that, Robbins, you know, he can be the second option and they can still win a champion. See, I don't like that because everyone's a role player. You've got to be willing to, even the biggest star on the team has to be able to embrace becoming a role player. True. Do we care, last thing before we get to Roger Bennett, do we care at all about the WBC? I think I care once we're in the semifinals or finals. I care about what time of the game's going to be. We're playing Brazil on Friday at some point. It's early. At some point. I don't care about Brazil. I don't care about Brazil either. I think once we get, if we're playing like the Dominican Republic or Japan, I'm in. What about Italy? Italy's got a roster. I'd like to smoke Italy. Italy's got a roster. I bet on Australia over Chinese Taipei last night. Taiwan? Australia won. Do you mean Taiwan, Max? In here they call it Chinese. In the booth? In the booth where you guys just award territory. We've discussed this before, Max. I was just saying that's what they, that's. You think that Taiwan is property of China. That's what the World Baseball Classic calls it. I'm going to call it Taiwan. Okay. Zach, are you a Taiwan guy? That's Taiwan. I agree. Max, you're a type A guy? I'm just a reading guy. Max is definitely a type A guy. Max. What does our government call it? Our government? Taiwan? Max, what would you... I feel really bad for the players on Team Italy that don't have a vowel to end their last There's a couple. They shouldn't be allowed on the team. Andrew Fletcher's on the team. Can't be on the team. That's tough. You got some really good names. And then you got a couple guys. I mean, Kyle Teal's on the team. I don't know. Who's that guy on Australia? Is it Bazuna? I don't know. Bazuna. Bazuna hit a fucking monster shot last night. He's a very good player. I was wondering why he wasn't on Italy. It seems like that guy should be Italian. Yeah, they should just scoop up everyone. Yeah. Actually, Shohei should be on Italy. They asked Shane Victorino to be on the team. Victorino? Yeah. We talked about that in our interview with him. Because they had a vowel of his last name. They thought he was Italian. Yeah, I want the U.S. to win the World Baseball Classic because I think it goes towards my overall goal for this year. I would like to win the Triple Crown. Yes. As a nation. I would like to win the gold medals. I guess it would be like a quadruple crown. A Grand Slam. Wait, what are they? That's why you call it quadruple crown, right? No, no, but what are the other, the gold medal? Women's hockey, men's hockey. Yep. And World Baseball Classic, World Cup. Oh, but I think even if we won the Super Bowl. Again. Yeah. So that would be the. And also we're hosting the Masters again. The Big Five. Yeah. Hosting the Masters is big. The Big Five. And then the sixth major, which would be the players. No, I would love, I would love so much to win the World Baseball Classic and then the World Cup. And it would just be the summer of America. I can't stop thinking about Shohei on Team Italy. I need it. Why not? Why not? Put Shohei on Team Italy. He's got a lot of connections in the mob. He knows a guy or two. He knows the mafia, dude. If we win the World Cup, I will commit to soccer. Oh, I thought you were going a different direction. Get a cat. Before you said the word soccer, that was... Hank, you know what? If we win the World Cup, I'll get a cat with you. Yeah, sure. All right, we'll both get cats if we win the World Cup. I can't get a cat. I just can't do that. All right. But I'll get another dog. No, that doesn't count. That's still American. No, that doesn't count. You've got to get a ferret. Is that American? You've got to get a ferret. What's the most American rodent I can get? You've got to get an animal you don't want. You've got to get a ferret. Okay, I'll get a ferret. All right. Are those legal here? Sure. I mean, the law is very, you know. It is fungible. It is, yeah. What are you guys getting? Put something up. I'll go Prairie Dog. Okay. Prairie Dog. Max. Stolpatch for a year. No. Why? We're not going to win the World Cup. No. I'll do that if Hank does that too. I'm getting a cat. He's getting a cat. I'd rather... All right, so you get a cat. I'll do Stolpatch. Deal. Oh, I'm allergic to cats. Wait, but I want to root to win the World Cup. I do too. I don't want to root to get a cat. Yeah, that's actually true. We should just not do that. Yeah. We're going to end up rooting against... We're never going to even be in a position. We should make it something that we actually want to do as a reward for ourselves. Yeah, yes. If we win the World Cup. Blowjob week. Memes? In? I was going to say I was going to enlist, but yeah, I'm down to nine. Okay, if we win the World Cup, I'll enlist in the Air Force. Yeah, just do a tour. I'll enlist in the Air Force if we win the World Cup. You're way too old. Thanks for leading with too old instead of too short. That was awesome. I'm back. I thought everyone in the Air Force is short. No, you're sitting down. Not as short as him. You're sitting down. You've got to be like six feet. No, I think Air Force is short. Yeah, you can't be too tall if you're going to be sitting in one of those cockpit. All right, so we're off on all these deals. We'll think of something good that we want. Or we'll just make a group bet. We'll just make a group bet on USA. Mm-hmm. And also maybe blowjob week. And blowjob week. Who's starting with giving? Head reviews. Yo, what's up? This is PFT. I'm over here at the stock station. One stock. Everyone knows the rules. One lick. You have to be at least 4'10". Oh, yeah. I easily got that. Easy. It's easy money. Easy. Okay. Let's get to our interview with Roger Bennett. We're going to talk some World Cup. Maybe we'll continue this conversation. Then when we finish with Roger Bennett, we'll do some Fyre Fest. Okay, before we get to Roger Bennett, a quick word from our friends. It's Chevy. Football season might be over, but you know how it goes. The minute the big game ends, we're already talking about what's next. Free agency, the draft, who's getting paid, who's grinding, because for football guys, there is no off season. That's exactly why they roll with the Chevy Silverado. Silverado is the truck that shows up every time, built to haul, tow, and take a beating, but smart where it counts with modern tech that makes life easier. Big screens, available camera views that help with towing and parking, in a cabin that feels right, whether you're road tripping, heading to practice, or loading up for the weekend. During the season, it's the MVP of tailgates. After the season, it turns into your training camp truck, hauling gear, tackling home projects, and doing the work that never stops, because the grind doesn't take breaks, and neither does Silverado. Check out the current offers and build your own Chevy Silverado at Chevy.com. We are also brought to you by our friends at Planet Fitness. Listen, I got some fitness goals this year. I'm starting to get stronger. We have a Planet Fitness set up here. I've been lifting some weights. I've been using the stair climber, the treadmill. Everybody can get strong at Planet Fitness. High value membership that supports any fitness journey. As low as $15 a month. Over 2,800 club locations. Most clubs open 24 hours. I just mentioned, I'm just in the iron jungle. Dumbbells. Dumbbells and the stair climber. That's where I'm going with Planet Fitness. We're all strong on this planet. Join today in club, online, or in the free PF app. Hours, amenities, and offers vary by club. Check out planetfitness.com or stop by your local club for more information. Must be 18 years old to enroll or 13 to 17 with Parent Guardian. All right, here he is, our good friend, Roger Bennett. Okay, we now welcome on a very, very, very, very, very special guest. Recurring guest, friend of the program, is Roger Bennett, Men in Blazers, and he has a new book out because we are 100 days. We're actually, what, 97 days? He's counting. 97 days as you're listening to this away from the World Cup in North America. We are the World Cup, a personal history of the world's greatest sporting event. You wrote this book. Words. I got to talk. First of all, thank you for coming by. And let's just, history of the World Cup, tell us all the history of the World Cup. In three full words. Yeah. Personal history. It's an incredible history of English failure. Yeah. True. It's true. It is. Like, that's probably, that's where it begins and ends. American big dreams. Yes. Is there a chapter in here that's like England and it just says missed PK? There is actually a history of English football that I use for my research. It's called 40 Years of Shit, which is one of my favorite. And, yeah, it's one of my favorite tomes. I mean, England are, and I support America now. For your audience, I know I sound like I'm from England. Citizen. Yeah. Thank God. Yeah? Yeah, I mean, I love this nation like Kenny Powers loves this nation. Our women kick ass and take names. Our men. We love a dream team. We're trying. Yeah. We do try. We've won one knockout game in our entire history, going all the way back to George Washington. So there's work to do. It's like a dream on team. Wait a minute. Is that true? So we beat Mexico, right? We've never beaten a team in the entire planet other than Mexico. Yeah, and we always beat him. Dos Nistarro. We do always. God blesses. In Columbus in, like, March when it's snowing. We've beaten them in the knockout. Good knowledge, man. And that's it. I mean, that team. We put a man on the moon. We invented the croon-up. Yeah. All of this crap. I'd say those two things. English failure and American big dreams. That's kind of the World Cup, baby. Yeah, the 2002 team. I still maintain that, like, that team was special. And that team couldn't. It should have gone to the semifinals in the World Cup. We should have been there. I love your love of it. I mean, there's a number of times they had fresh, clear water in front of them. 2010, the Landon Donovan moment, which turned so many people on to football. And every single World Cup has made America more and more a football-loving nation. 1994, World Cup was here. Right before it, Jack Kemp, the quarterback, the Rams quarterback, who's a congressman, he went on to the floor of Congress. Any other nation would be like, we got the World Cup. Biggest thing that's going to ever happen to our nation. Jack Kemp ran to the floor of Congress and he said, I think it's really important that we tell American children that football is where you rush with it and throw it and catch it and use your hands and not where you kick it. And he said, this is real words. He said, one is American capitalism, the other is European socialism. You guys hate it. There was a study before the last World Cup, 94, where soccer was found to be America's 67th most favorite sport and tractor pulling. was 66 you're like taking the piss and that's the other story is that you know america is now a football loving nation which is hard to understand it's like a young audience it's got bigger world cups a world cup i just did a rod show which was like a great honor um and he just essentially asked me 10 questions all of which were the same like when are we gonna like football yeah and i was like a rod like the economist just found out that soccer is the third biggest sport in America, popularity-wise. He said, where's baseball? I said, it's fourth now, eh, Rod? Oh, no. And it was like telling a flat earth that, you know, the world is round, baby. But that's where we are. Now, you were ahead of the curve, man. I mean, yeah, I love the World Cup. It's probably my favorite sporting event every four years. And the fact that's it. Why is that, man? I don't know. I don't really care much for, like, European football or European soccer. I don't really care about the EPL. I don't care about the Champions League. don't really care about the MLS but when it comes time for the international competitions for some reason it's just like it's the pride that goes into it's the people from all around the world it's the stupid things that like the little pop culture icons that pop up every four years that you you learn about and you care about very deeply for a four-week span and then you completely forget about them until fans in the stands so you like watch your english people just fire yeah fire rockets out of their yeah yeah cavity yeah so you guys like oh i'm into this Yeah, the fat English guys with tattoos everywhere. Yeah, English guys. Yeah, but they've been in the sun for five minutes, and they look like a lobster. All this stuff. I like the, there's always like one hot chick that just gets uber famous. Yeah. Because she's shown on camera for about like two seconds, and then her life changes. Yeah. And she becomes a millionaire. Yeah. That's something like, remember the Brazilian guy crying? That's something like SEC football. Yeah, that is very similar. Yeah, I like saying it's coming home. I like saying that, and then not really believing it or knowing what it means. is it actually is it coming home that's the deepest question i think you'll ever ask anyone is it ever coming home so it's coming home is a song of english longing like england invented football we think we should win it by right we win it once 1966 on home turf like every english school kid it's like you know 1985 in chicago it's like that was the year 1966 is like the year everyone dreams of it and english football there's nothing like it the whole nation i mean the joy of sports, man, is that you make yourself believe when all evidence points to the contrary unless you're a New York Jets fan. And you're just like, you're just like in it, and they dream, and they make themselves believe, and then they shit the bed. It's the most self-sabotage. It's like watching Charlie Brown run out of football. The whole nation is Charlie Brown with Lucy kicking. Apart from like the whole nation's been like, Lucy, do that thing again. It's a thing where I eff up, where I feel an agony, where I feel a national trauma. and it's the most English thing that ever English did. So alright so I want to talk about the book but I want to keep going down this line of like the big dreams of America the shit of England and Charlie brown can we do a couple other countries like what what what brazil what it was brazil historically well obviously they've won world cups they played beautiful but they also flop a lot a lot yeah flopping so what is that like you know in terms of you know maybe it's this tournament or just in general in history we just did we used to the show last night in houston with jj watt where he's like he went off on the flopping. He owns a team in the Premier League. This child of Wisconsin who grew up playing hockey and gridiron fell in love. He came on our show, did a football thing. It was fine. He kind of knew his stuff kind of didn't. And then he asked to come on a couple of months later. And I was like, cool. In my head, I was like, we kind of did it. We did it. We did all we could. He goes, I've been down a YouTube wormhole. There we go. And he came back on and he knew. I mean, it's not that hard to know more than me. He knew a lot more than me. I said, what happened, man? He said, I've just fallen in love with this crap. I'm going to go and buy a Premier League team. I'm like all in on this thing. And when we have J.J. Watt, this child of Wisconsin, living for Burnley, it's like the Allentown, Pennsylvania of England. Yeah. Football club. We've kind of got everybody. Yeah. No, J.J. also was like, he jumps all the way in. I mean, look what he's done as a commentator, like on games. He's so good at it. And he thinks it's like, yeah. It should be illegal to be able to beat up pretty well anybody in the United States of America and then outthink them. Yeah. Yeah. That's the University of Wisconsin education. So, let's talk about this World Cup. Who are the teams? Does Spain still do Tiki Taka or whatever the hell it's called? Oh, Brazil. Oh, yeah, let's do Brazil. Brazil, it's like, you walk down Cooper Cabana Beach. They love Barry Manolet. They're really all in on that man. Name a beach after. And they have like 100,000 people playing football, keepy uppies and like you're looking at you're like oh my god like any one of those people man woman there's dogs that can do like keepy uppies there that could probably get into the u.s team and you're like wow like this scale the passion the way it's just woven in it's like high school basketball in indiana you know it's impossible to tell the soul of the place about football as a freedom of expression and so you're kind of there and you're like wow we've got ways to go i mean Spain is, I don't know what the American equivalent is, they have such a tactical discipline. They've developed little Ewoks. They've bred Ewok playing footballers who are just so comfortable. It's like they wear the ball inside their boot. It's like what they can do with it is just utterly transcendent. I don't know what the, they're playing on the 4D level. Yeah, yeah. Do they still do the, because the Tiki Tag is kind of, maybe a little bit like West Coast offense, where it's like, hey, short passes, ball control. and then we'll just kind of we'll just keep doing it and you can't stop it and then eventually we'll break open the big ones. And it's just woven into the fabric of their society the thing they do that we don't is that they don't give a crap whether their kids win or lose. Like in America you guys love to win. Yeah. Well we're winners I don't know if you saw the gold medal game we're winners. I know but if we lose we just pretend it didn't happen. Right. Or it doesn't matter. There you go. But under seven soccer, under eight soccer, no one really cares. Yeah. And so to win at under eight, under nine, under ten soccer in America, you just put the big kid in. Yep. And he just mows everybody down. There's always someone who's like William Refrigerator Perry just mowing down another six, seven-year-olds. And that's how you win at under seven, under eight, under nine. In Spain, I like to stop the score. Leave the little kids in. Let them enjoy. Let them destroy all comers where their little, you know, origami passes. and they don't ever give a crap about the results until they play for the big boys. When they do, they destroy all of us. In America, sometimes your impulse to win, our impulse to win, is actually holding us back. Yeah, it is. I've always thought that with America, and this is true, I think, with soccer as a whole, if you want to win a World Cup, first you have to actually believe that you can win a World Cup. Because if you don't have that true belief that you can do it, there's so many, like the entire game is just a constant fluid game. You're not going to be playing as passionately as hard as somebody that truly believes that they can win a World Cup. And we need a crazy motherfucker. We need one guy on our team who's absolutely fucking insane that really believes that we can win a World Cup. And then that gets contagious for the rest of the team. So I don't know how much you know about what the projected U.S. men's team roster is going to be, but do you know if we have a crazy motherfucker? Like the old Brian Bosworth kind of mentality. Yeah. He's ripping his shirt sleeves off, like, tie around the head. By the way, you've nailed it, man. The world knows that we know that they know that we know that they know that we're crap at men's football. And it's, like, the last thing America's crap at, and the whole world, the soccer thing. Like, in England, by the way, they call it soccer. The biggest show on English television is Soccer Saturday. No one laughs at it. But when we do soccer, and they say soccer, like, the whole world laughs at us for calling it soccer, mostly because we're so insecure about it, we kind of back off when they laugh at us. So the world loves that we are still inferior there. And when you speak to players from like 2006, 2010, when they played that big team for the first time and you ask them, did you really think when you took the field against Belgium in 2014 that you guys looking at each other being like, we're going to win this game? And they'll tell you off the record, they'll be like, not really. And that's really what it takes. But the funny, the other odd thing is that 1994 team that took the field, you were a baby, you were like 8-9. they took the field in like stonewashed denim jerseys like mullets football world had never seen mullets to that point it was like what is that ginger hair yeah you know swaggering on they were these kids were like college players they were not very few of them had played in europe and they didn't know what they didn't know and they were really fearless you know i interviewed a couple of them uh for this book and one that 1990 was the first time the u.s men got back into the world cup since 1950 we've been like off the off the you know just like reduced to a rubble we got back in 90 they were like tourists were really good tickets they got their ass kicked by everybody 94 they did the thing like they didn't crap their pants with the nation watch and they got noble valiant defeat and then what um they all said yeah what we believe is 90 we showed the world we could qualify 94 we showed the world we belonged and the most american thing ever They were like, 98, we were going to show the world we could win it. Yes. And we're still waiting. We're in the last place. Last place, man. They got beat by Iran with the nation watching, and they barely scored a goal. So that American mentality, yeah, I mean, we're far away, I think, from having that human being. We also, like, the Max Crosby kind of like, yeah. He needs a team. Yeah, he needs a team. We need more grit. Like, that was the thing. When watching the gold couple, was it two years ago? We were soft. So if we suck at soccer, that's fine. We can't be soft and suck. And that was what I hated watching. God, we've got to get you in the locker room. We've got to be a little tougher. We've got to maybe rough them up. There's a future for you. Get dirty with it. Can we not be soft? Am I right with the Gold Cup? The Gold Cup was the one that we were just bullied. You're right. The best U.S. teams I can think of, looking back, we had a couple players. I'll go back to 2002. That's when I think that the U.S. actually had a chance. We should have beaten Germany. We should have been in the semifinals of the World Cup. We got fucked by a handball. We got screwed in that game. I'll go to my death thinking that we should have beaten Germany. But that team had, like, two guys that were just fucking monsters. Aguchi Onyewu, who was, like, 220 pounds, 6'3", who, like, just pushed people over. And then a guy named Big Cat, Tony Santa, the Big Cat. he was like a role player on defense but he was also a guy that like didn't take any shit we need those guys on this team you know that would be I do love your knowledge is breathtaking it's only about the US man's action working with this Swansea owner working with this man I don't know if I still own any part of Swansea how do you not know I don't know I gotta look it up you were like ahead of the curve you were in that moment the first massive global superstar to buy into, well, Welsh football. And I would get blamed for things on the message board. And now 2026, Snoop Dogg is going to your team. Yeah. Wait, he's investing in Swansea? He heard you owned a little bit. Okay. He wanted to dip his knees. There we go. Do you not see this? This is so mad, man. I can't say yet. Listen, I got three kids now. I got into Swansea and I didn't have kids. You've given the gift. You broke the seal. Now everyone's letting me in. All these followers like Snoop following in your pathway. I'm just trying to grow the game. Snoop, I know. You care, man. You do. It's here. It's here. It's arms up. Snoop went to Swansea. Swansea is like, I can't even think of what Swansea's American equivalent. I'm like scratching my head. Oh, man. I mean, you will be able to know it because you know the town, the people, the fat base. He went down. They gave out Snoop Tells before the game. They had not sold, like, hardly anyone goes to the game. Snoop was there. The whole city was there. It was mobbed. This is 2026, how surreal football is. He did a lap of honour before the game. The place went utterly berserk. And so we may not be very good at football right now. And please God, that would change my lifetime. Like, I just want the Chicagoers to win one more Super Bowl while I'm alive. I'd love the U.S. men to win a World Cup in my lifetime. You actually think we can? In our lifetimes. The Bears? No, I hope the Bears. The U.S. men's team. Man, this country can do whatever. I agree with that, but it feels like the one thing we can't do is soccer. Well, we need you in the locker room. I know. We've already solved that problem, man. We send you in there. You give the team to him. Knees dirty. What was it? A bit of grit. Yeah, a little grit. A little push him around a little. But you said it when you go to Brazil. the dogs are playing soccer better than us they're so good the dogs are so good honestly I would watch that's a league we could build, Brazilian dog soccer Brazilian dog soccer, if I could bet on it I'd absolutely watch that if I can gamble on it I mean the dogs would not do it unless you could gamble on it we don't really need this enough but the gambling is very interesting pulling it back, we may not win but we own everything this is the crazy thing again, 1994, no one cared you all hated it you protested too much I moved here I moved to Chicago had everything man that I wanted apart from football wasn't anywhere I used to have to call my dad in Liverpool he'd hold the phone against the radio to follow along the team now every Premier League team the majority of they're owned by Americans you've got Boston Red Sox they own Liverpool Chelsea they're owned by the Dodgers you've got the Buccaneers family Glazers doing their slightly curious Manchester United is possibly going to win the league. Yeah, they're seven points up right now. And now they've got Sean McVay just giving little notes. Should we change everything? Do you want me to do a little side off World Cup? How's Everton doing? I mean, Everton are like the Bears. I don't know where my Bears end and where Everton begins. Yeah. With dreamers. They're not going to get relegated, though. in my book I wrote there's a poet Eduardo Galeone I'm sure a lot of people come on your show and quote Eduardo yeah yeah no we know him well he's a gorgeous man you should have him on apart from his death yeah we had had him on he wrote football is a pleasure that hurts is like his thing and that is it Everton are a pleasure that hurts I like that that's a good way to do it the Bears have been the same way yeah the Bears have been very much the same way so Everton are kind of in that in that locust in that locust alright But again, I wouldn't know what to do if they did start winning. Right. It gets confusing. Would you want your team, like when your team lose, and that's what they like to your identity. It's hard. Don't take away my losing. Yeah, it's hard to adapt to that. Don't take away my losing. It's very difficult. I struggled. I had one good year with the commanders, and then I just kind of lost my mind. And I was like, if you don't say that Jane Daniels is a top five quarterback, I will kill you. And you feel yourself a little bit too much. Did you enjoy the winning? You grasp onto that brief moment where you think that you're never going to lose again, and then right back. I find supporting teams that are self-defeating and heartbreakingly... I think if that is the worst part of your life, you're doing pretty well. That's a good point. If your sports team are absolute bollocks, and everything else is like, okay... Yeah, it's good perspective. But I would not want to take away my losing, is the honest. I think the English people wouldn't know what to do if they won in the United States' 250th anniversary. And they became... Oh, man. I didn't even think about that. You probably take a lot of joy in watching your rivals lose, though. Like, if you root for a team that's not successful... Shut them through. The best thing you can do is just, like, I'm so glad that the New England Patriots lost the Super Bowl again. English people, which I'm not anymore, obviously American. By the way, we need to have you just be, like, maybe you'll just be our president. because the way you talk about American swagger and that we own everything, it doesn't feel as in your face when it has an English accent. It works! You know what I mean? We own everything. We can do anything. It's because you've got the words of swagger but the English coating of self-loathing is to be... When we say it, we're assholes. You think about Schadenfreude. There's a saying, if you gave an English person the choice between his own success and your failure. He'd choose your failure every day of the week. That's genuinely how England lives. That's why most football fans would bite your arm off to be able to laugh at their enemy's failure. Far more, I think, than you did. Winning that joy is kind of fleeting. Well, then you've got to do it again. Yeah, I'm stressed off managing those expectations. You've got some pressures to lose. You've raised the bar. You've never raised the bar. It can only be one way down, but endless joy out of your enemy's pain. Yeah. Quick break from Roger Bennett. Talk to you about Twisted Tea. Twisted Tea is a refreshing hard ice tea made with real brewed tea and 5% alcohol. Twisted Tea is the perfect drink to keep the good times going all day and all season long, whether you're hanging out at a friend's house, catching a game at the stadium or at the bar, or day drinking with friends. Twisted Tea is there to turn your day up a notch and make a good time a great time. Grab a refreshing Twisted Tea today. We love Twisted Tea, the half and half, the peach, the original. The OG is the best. Well, actually, I think I'm more half and half than OG, but either way, you hand me a Twisted Tea, I'm drinking it. I love it. It's getting to Twisted Tea season. It's going to be 70 degrees on Monday in Chicago. Spring is here, and we've changed the clock. So grab a refreshing Twisted Tea today, and now back to Roger Bennett. I got a question about the book. So what's your first World Cup memory? And what was the one that's crystallized? Like, hey, this is... 1978, Argentina. And what was it about it? We didn't have live television in England. England's a tiny island. This is kind of mental. The people that ran the football teams wouldn't allow any live football because we're about as big as Indiana. And so if they were terrified, if they put live games on, no one would go to any 92 teams. so we never saw live football other than going to the game and when you went to the game it was played by kind of dumpy men, balding mostly, who'd try and kick the crap out of each other on muddy pitches they'd run and scurry into their locker room at half time for a cigarette and a pint and a pie and then the whole crowd would beat the shit out of each other and it was pretty, you know, it was fun but it was also deeply miserable when you actually thought about it and Argentina had the World Cup and they had these incredible stadiums And, like, the first thing I saw, I was seven. It was, like, the sun. It took me a while to realize what the hell it was. I was like, what is that orange thing in the air? My mum's like, it's the sun. Look, it's the sun. I was like, oh, because we're like a nation of mole men. So I'm looking at this thing. Everyone's beautiful. They're all in, like, shit. And then 100,000 people, the two teams take the field. And the whole stadium just explodes in confetti. And, like, thousands of toilet rolls are thrown from their bleachers. my mum sitting there she goes who take a toilet roll to a football game so and I was like oh show up mum this is amazing and I realized in that second football could be joyous and sports I've never sports is punishing sports is about having someone you didn't know from behind urinate down the back of your legs through a rolled up program and I was like I was hooked from that moment but in all seriousness the joy of the world cup and this is I think kind of what you were saying is when two teams take the field, like their nation's history, their nation's politics, their nation's culture takes the field alongside them, and it's just the depth of all of it. When you play Germany, like the levels of storytelling there, like, you know, when you play, when people play America, this World Cup, it's going to be, I mean, it's going to be super multidimensional in the, that's why Panama tried to kick the crap out of us, the canal crap, Canada, yeah that's why we need you talking shit for us yeah maybe he's that man have you thought about I'll feed it to me you just deliver it I'm just here to spread love and peace baby I feel like you might be next in line for the FIFA Peace Prize yeah I don't know if I'm worthy I don't know if I'm worthy you don't know if you can pay enough for it you're not getting the FIFA podcasting I mean why do FIFA suffer the Peace Prize the FIFA podcasting prize for peace why do they not give a prize for like music so like yeah kid rock together and like you know They should just expand. Well, doesn't it give you hope that maybe we could win a World Cup if the tournament is put on by such a nakedly corrupt organization like FIFA? We could just bribe our way to it. Why haven't we done that? Well, I've got to say, this conversation for the past 30 minutes, I think we've solved a lot of football problems. And ultimately, we need your action. You need to follow through on all of these things. The dog football league, less gambling. the grit the get your knees dirty the team talk get in there I mean the FIFA thing it's I mean it's like Roger Goodell but global man right it's um you know they do the thing they think about different things and we do when we go to sports and it's like it's just different so um another team that's had a lot of success in the past not recently is Italy is Italy ever going to play in another World Cup again they don't need to they've had so much joy the memories the memory they can live off those for forever the italian thing is very strange man i mean countries the tectonic plates the the economy bottoms out the you know i think some time after rome felt uh things went down the toilet football is about money and the teams that do really well have tons of it and you're seeing like europe you can tell a team that's not going to do well when you go to their nation and they're nice to you know they need tourist dollars you know what i mean and so that's really it the Italian, I mean it's in a tough place as the economies crumble more opportunity for you, the American team, the dog league so they miss the World Cup again? there's a very very the playoffs, there's a playoff oh yeah, we still don't have all the teams we don't have them all, they can play their way in still, it's like the play-in game for March Madness so they're in there, but I do think the nation's race but they won they won stuff yeah yeah and ultimately surrounded by that winning is dismal failure and rebuilding year would you take like i mean you don't have you don't have yeah you don't have it man you don't have like relegation yeah that's the craziest thing relegating countries yeah yeah you go it's not a country anymore you're mad it is mad though america you love like cutthroat capitalism yeah in sports you don't have any punishments for in fact you get rewarded Yeah. It's like, your sports are like socialism for rich guys. Yeah. That's very smart. Yeah, absolutely. So you don't have it. You can put out the worst product ever and you'll still get a big check at the end. Yeah, you do not. Pittsburgh Pirates are going to make money. It's crazy. Fucking White Sox fan. Yeah, right. Jerry Ridesworth has figured it out. He's a genius. He bought the White Sox at the Bulls for like a bushel of blueberries and now they're billions of dollars. When you scream it like that, the man is a business genius. But that's the darkness, man. It's like, in football, if you crap the bed, you get punished for it. And that is a debate. There's a team, Tottenham Hotspur, who are historically a powerhouse. They have just completely and utterly destroyed the team culture. The fans hate the players. The players hate the fans. The players hate everyone. And they're in deep, deep, deep danger of being relegated. They were up 1-0 on Crystal Palace when I just walked by the gambling game. I love it. If you'd walk back minutes later, you'd see they were 3-1 down. And all the fans were walking out at halftime. but they're still in the Champions League they can still win something and their fans are debating whether they would love to win something and actually get relegated oh you weren't lying, they're down 3-1 oh they're still down 3-1 God bless the darkness they are the Chicago Bears of London so that's it, but you can't have that in American sports whether you would accept a dark, dark punishment and won it would drive down the prices of a team so much that nobody would want it No owners would agree to it. No one would want to pay $6 million for a team if there's a chance. And that's what we lose. Yeah. We've thrown out the idea that would be great for especially baseball because everyone's like, how do you fix baseball? The idea that we came up with was if you can't go over $500 for five consecutive seasons, you automatically have to sell the team. Like, immediately. Five seasons. You guys get to dictate who the buyer is as well. No, it just goes to sale. You have to sell it. Five seasons is crazy. To not be over 500 for five seasons in baseball. When are you going to be the commissioner? Is it before or after you become the U.S.? That was our best idea. There's a lot worse. It's like an iceberg. You don't want to go down. You don't want to see what's underneath with some of our... I thought you were going to say you want relegation. No. You can move the poor Tuckett Red Sox up for the major leagues. I think it would be unbelievable. It would be incredible. Yeah, it's just never going to happen the way that they write in the bylaws. I love you. You guys are mad. It's like you've just defended why it doesn't happen here because the team's values would... Yeah, I don't hate it, but it's... I mean, I do hate it, but it's the reality, and it's never going to change. Like, the one thing that I always say is European sports fans have it figured out better than we do. They don't take any shit. If the teams, like, try to fuck them over, if they try to raise ticket prices, if they're in the middle of a dry spell, like, the fans will... They'll do the walkout. They'll do a walkout. You do what you do. I mean, like, any self-respecting fan base would go to the training ground and threaten the players with crowbars. That's what you do. Now in America, we just say, hey, we're tanking. This is awesome. By the way, when I first watched the NFL, it was a New Orleans Saints bad season. It was 85. Yeah. And I watched the Saints put, the fans put paper bags on their heads and be the eights. Yeah. And I'd never seen like fans. I was like, I looked at it. I thought, oh my God. Like, they are just, they've still got the beer. They've still got the hot dog. Life's not that bad. But they were making a joke out of it. Yeah. I was like, why are they not ripping their shirts off, jumping onto the field and trying to kick the crap out of the players? That probably would not have ended well for the fans like this in England. But, like, you get, that's the biggest difference between all of this. Yeah. Is that, and the American owners of the Premier League teams, you, that's crazy, you let your owners move teams. Right, yeah. But you're, like, so compliant, you're like, yeah, of course, yeah, they own it, they can do what they want, man. Yeah. Well, no, we hate it. But it's just, you just can't do anything. It's a reality that we've kind of accepted. Like the owner of the athletics, John Fisher, like, fuck that guy. Oh, yeah, we did. We literally, we went like months where we said every podcast, like, fuck that guy. Bad human being. I don't care that like he's making a lot of money good for his family, I guess. But you have to realize that the one thing we don't have in America, the owners of these teams, they don't really care about the communities that they buy teams in. They just, they want their investment. I don't understand why you would like cheer for the Rams. it's like when you've cheated when you've moved to another city it could happen again I don't know why the Raiders like Las Vegas but that's also an NFL problem because the NFL wants the big markets the NFL is the one that pushed them to do that but like the American owners go over to England they buy the Premier League teams and when you speak to them they'll be like okay we see them as vastly underdeveloped and what does that mean they'll be like essentially content platforms they're not really content platforms this is the reason why our Bears are looking for a new stadium. It's not because the McCaskey, I don't think the McCaskey necessarily want to do it. The NFL says, hey, you've got to get a new stadium so now you're worth $9 billion so we're worth $7 billion. Everyone goes up. That's all they're trying to do. It's bullshit. What are we aiming for? It's a tradition at this point. It's just like, I went here when I was a kid. I used to watch the games. I watched these games with my parents. so I'm going to continue to root for that same thing. I was going to say the Dog League. Yeah, I think the Dog League might just sever them. I think that plays sever them. I had a question, another question. Like an NFL PA in the Dog League? Is there a union? Yeah. It's got to be a tiny dog. Yeah, a tiny dog. A tiny dog. That's what we know. It's a little over. That's when they unionize. This might be a movie. This might be a new movie that we just created. Air Bud, yeah. It's a sequel to Boner Ducks. I did. I went to Spain over Christmas, and I took a tour of the stadium that they have there. the new Real Madrid stadium. So the crazy thing about that place, and it's beautiful. I went inside, I looked around, I was like, this is an amazing stadium, and I couldn't put my finger on why I liked it so much. And then after about like three minutes, it dawned on me, there are no visible advertisements anywhere in this city. They spent like $1.8 billion upgrading it. They put a lot of money into it. But you look around in the states, and if you're at like any ballpark, it doesn't matter what sport, there's the giant banners everywhere. Where your eyes, they're drawn to it. Everywhere you look, advertisement, advertisement, billboard. And this giant, giant brand new stadium that costs $2 billion or whatever it is to upgrade. There's just no advertising. And it looks clean. It looks beautiful. And I thought to myself, like, how is this even possible? How, why are the owners of this team not concerned with making money like in America? What's the difference there? Because it's an awesome experience to go to a game and not have to look at all that stuff. wait till Shahid they come over here on their tour and they see the Jacksonville Jaguars Stadium with the jacuzzis and they're gonna go back careful careful don't talk about I'll draw the Jaguars pool the pool is the best I'm gonna yeah god that'll be they'll be bringing a lot of it is the Americans are like it is content platforms it is so unbelievably crazy. I don't know what we're cheering for. Dog leagues, you can ask me something. Yeah, alright, I was going to ask you, in the history of the World Cup, because this is the book that you wrote, the history of the World Cup, best champion ever. What's the team where you're like, that was the team? United States 2034, 2038, the best, I mean, the World Cup ended 2022. I mean, it's quite a cliffhanger if it was a television series that ended like, you know, wow, I can't wait for the next one with Lionel Messi, Argentina. My goat. That's fighting to all that. Yeah. Oh, Ronaldo's bigger and stronger than everyone? Two kind of human beings. There's a Ronaldo kind of human being and there's a Lionel Messi kind of human being. Yeah, I'm a Maradona. Yeah. He did everything Messi did on cocaine. Yeah. And he was fatter. Yeah. True. And I just live life. Yeah. Just live for life. That's one way to put it. Just live for life. So the Maradona thing, to Messi and Mbappe, that was like, I don't know what Super Bowl that would be. That was just like Plato's cave football. That was just like, I don't like to be hyperbolic. It was like watching Homer's Odyssey acted out live. I mean, they were just trading goals, biggest moment. This human being, little Lionel Messi, tiny little man, looks like he's wandered out of super cuts. But it's like, oh my God, just transcendent football star. Four times he'd failed. the Maradona thing lingering like Maradona in heaven you're not as good as me you can never be as great as me until you win he's on teams that are crazy like reckless I mean just insane all they wanted to do was just you know eat the beef drink the beer and not win the football everything was on him loses his first game to Saudi Arabia which was just like oh my god it's happening again and the stud digs deeper and ends up winning it was like watching Sisyphus like roll up rock up the hill, Marv Levy would have been looking down from heaven and been like, respect, you got there. Marv Levy's still alive. Is he really? Yeah, 100. Is he really? 100. That makes me so happy. I know. Is he really alive? Yes. Oh, God bless you, Marv Levy. Yeah. God. Yeah, isn't that great? What a great day. He actually lives in Chicago. 100 years old. Now you're winding me up. I swear to God, I actually went and did a radio remote with him like seven years ago. He was still sharp as could be. I'm so unbelievably happy. Yeah. If you'll wind him up. I would not joke about that. I want you to know, if I find out he's dead, I am going to be crushed. The only reason I bring it up is because Eddie, who you met before the Bears-Packers game when we saw you on the sideline, Eddie texted me the other day. He's like, hey, do you think we should see if Marv Levy will come in? I was like, yeah, I guess. Big call for Marv. Yeah. By the way, the first time I ever came to Chicago, 1986, after the Super After Year, first American Bowl, I stayed with a Chicago kid in Northbrook and he took me to see his grandma, we were going out to Carson's Ribs, that was very fancy back in the day I went to pick his grandma up, I was just like this 15 year old kid in a tower block on Lakeshore Drive and she goes, you should introduce him to my neighbour, I was like, who's your neighbour? She goes, Sid Luckman I was like, what? And genuinely I rang his doorbell this beautiful, lovely, gorgeous old man with like old man handwriting for the autograph, like the little wobbly uh and then i got to spend an afternoon with sid look that's incredible and now god i mean he was like half marv levy yeah we're gonna get yeah we're gonna get marv levy marv levy to the gauntlet yeah all right so anyway messy that woke up yeah that was still a cliffhanger yeah yeah by the way the other one there would be maradona man 1986 diego maradona on a terrible team this incredible player who i mean you were not joking he's like did the blow Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday sweated out Friday football Saturday then repeat repeat I mean that was who he was he was a squat impudent like huge he was like a running back he was built like the thighs Maurice Jones Drew exactly you couldn't knock him off the ball played England shadow of the Falkland War like these were my heroes and I still rooted for the English team and Diego Maradona this 5 foot 6 little man first goal he punched is this familiar yeah the hand of God yeah he jumped he jumped over the goalkeeper like punched it I don't know why the television commentator didn't actually see it like it was pretty blatant no VAR yeah no VAR the referee didn't see it and afterwards an incredible line man like out of a Muhammad Ali-esque man he said did you handle it and he said it was a little bit the head of Diego a little bit the hand of God just incredible branding man But then a couple of minutes later, while we're just reeling in agony, like genuinely, like I was borderline going to disembowel myself. It was just like my heroes being absolutely injustice. He destroyed the whole team. He picked the ball up deep and beat all 10 of them. And one of the English players later said, it was a goal so breathtaking. It was all I could do to not applaud it myself. And so one goal, like bastard, second goal. and when it was over i went outside and i don't know if you've ever felt like this after watching the team you love crap the bed with the world watching i got a soccer ball and just drove it through the window of the house like just in agony just like you know too many team movies i've probably watched and my dad who was a bit of a you know he's a bit of a disciplinary ambassador the glass was tinkling down and he just looked at me i was like panting like desperately sweaty like young James Spader. And he goes, he just goes, son, I understand. I understand. He's been there. Yeah. So that's it. Those two, 86. Yeah. The last one. Please God, this one. Yeah. The world needs a bit of joy. The world needs a bit of connectivity. The world needs a bit of coming together and feeling good about itself. I would agree with that. We'll get back to Roger Bennett in a second. He's brought to you by Venmo, where you can get in the game with a college-branded Venmo debit card. Earn up to 5% cash back at some of your favorite brands with Venmo Stash Rewards. You can add your Venmo debit card to your mobile wallet as soon as you sign up and pay online and in-store right from your phone. The best part is the card is tied right to your Venmo account. If you got paid back for dinner, you can immediately access the money in your Venmo balance and spend it on what you want. Game day snacks, tickets, new merch. You can easily split purchases in the app. There's no monthly fee, no minimum balance. Score more with the college-branded Venmo debit card. Get up to 5% cash back with Venmo Stash. What would you use your Venmo Stash on? 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So don't just go it alone. When you need help protecting what matters most, State Farm is there. State Farm with the assist. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability and eligibility vary by state. And now here's more Roger Bennett. What are your thoughts on the different groups? Like the group that the United States is in, I feel like we got a good draw. And then England, that felt like they were a group of death. Are they a group of death? No, everyone's going to get out. Every team you care about will get out. It's a very, very large World Cup. three teams out of the four will get out. The thing about America that's amazing is that we were like, yeah, we got these teams. We didn't get any good ones. Every other team in our group is looking at us and being like, yeah, we got America. We didn't get one. We could have got Argentina. We could have got England and all that kind of thing. When Shaq put his hand into the bowl and pulled out Australia... He did the Lord's work. It was wonderful. That was a great moment in American history. By the way, You know, they only use balls in drawers when they're trying to fix them. Now, in this day and age, with all the technologies that are... But the amazing thing is how Shaq... Because some of those balls are hot, I imagine. Yeah. Some of those balls are very cold. And the amazing thing is, because Shaq, that hand, is how he like... I mean, there would have been like micro little dots for him. That was incredibly deaf. Yeah, it was wonderful. He did a great job. He should get probably... What's the medal that they give out? The thing of honor. Purple heart. Yeah. Medal of honor, yeah. then yeah put that work alone it was incredible but yeah we should get out of the group yeah we have to we have to get out of that group it's what Australia Paraguay and then to be determined probably Turkey Turkey okay Turkey's pretty good though right they're the ones that we don't want they're annoyingly good but we'll get out we will get out and god I've got to say Landon Donovan that goal 2010 do you even remember that yeah they were on the brink of crapping the bed again going out 2-2 it was they needed to yeah they needed to be Algeria yeah it was like the best the best distribution ever from Tim Howard on that play right it was I mean it was it was like QB1-esque it was I mean it was Friday Night Lights threw it out bit of Alcidore bit of Dempsey London Donovan 2-2 by the way was Portugal that was the best win of all time that was the the best win was the 1-1 with England when New York We win 1-1. Yeah, I mean, that was amazing, though. That was 2010, the Algeria thing. We were, like, out in the opening where we'd shat the bed again. We'd failed. And when America fell with England, shit the bed, no one really cares. The Premier League comes back and everyone forgets. They all find different reasons to hate each other. If America fails, it sets the game back like a decade. That's the crazy thing about your... What's at stake? Yeah, like, every time they shit the bed, it's like 10 years off and so they scored and it was beautiful but it was like dodging a bullet I mean they lost in the next game anyway but it gave you a sports sentiment that's what football, that's what the Americans need to do they need to give you moments that you register man you're the threshold big cap you have to know what they've done and people need to see but this World Cup will be massive whether they do well or don't do well because there is an enormous audience now there is like this young, huge footballing audience who, if the US do well, it's magic. If they don't, the 1994 World Cup was like, OJ did his thing on the first day. So like, it kind of like... It's a good way to put it, yeah. He did his thing. Yeah. He did his thing. He did the thing. He did the say what you want about OJ. Yeah, he did the thing. He was 100% OJ. Yeah, he did the thing. He screwed himself. He did the thing. He did the thing. So like, no one was talking about the World Cup. it was the Rockets were playing the next one that night. And then three days later, Ireland played Italy in the Meadowland. And, like, New Jersey showed up. Like, half of them, it was like Angela's Ashes, and half of them looked like the cast of The Sopranos. They were all there. And it was a delirious thing. It showed America that you can all just, like, dig into your roots, like your hybrid identities. And so whatever happens, like, it will be. You guys that World Cup is still the biggest World Cup in terms of attendance Oh wow Well yeah because there are stadiums too This one will smash all the records I assume Yeah you guys love a circus You love daytime drinking excuses And you love, like, low productivity. It's the perfect problem. March Madness, yeah. You know what we don't like is the time wasting. We've got to do something about the time wasting. Yeah, hate it. Why can't we just do, like, why can't the clock just stop when the ball goes out of the second half? And the flop, which is worse, the flopping, the time wasting. The flopping is bad, but it'd be better if it wasn't also time wasted. And they also feel like they've kind of figured out the flopping. Like, they fixed it a little bit. A little bit. Well, the clocky. It's a problem, man. Yeah, but, like, I think refs have gotten a little bit better being like, it's so clear what you're doing here. Why don't we have a clock? Because electricity's only just been invented in England, I think, is part of it. But PFC's right. When you have a game and there's, like, everyone should know. 80 minutes left, or sorry, it's in the 80th minute, and a team is up 1-0 or 2-1, and they just sit on it. It sucks. Arsenal did that shit the other day, right? What are you talking about? It sucks. What are you talking about? They get that from you. No, you still have to get first downs. You still got to get first downs. They get that from you when you're running the clock out. Yeah, but you still got to get first downs. We didn't used to do that in the football. We learned that off you. No. I'll tell you. No. No. No. We did. I'll tell you how it's happening. It's happening. Joe Mazzula is now very friendly. There's a football man, Pep Guardiola. And Pep Guardiola and Joe Mazzula have got this deep, deep friendship. They both come on our show to talk about each other. And they're begging and borrowing. Sean McVeigh and Kroenke's team Arsenal, Mikel Arteta, they become very close. So our coaches, who used to exist in their own little world, were the only things that mattered, were great haircuts, cologne, driving Lambos into a lamppost, walking out buying another Lambo. That was what was important about football. And now they're getting your wily American ways. They're learning to run out the clock. You watch the end of an NFL game. You've still got to get first down. And Chris Collinsworth is just telling us how they're going to get the minutes off the ground. You think that way because you grew up watching English football. You watched English football so they never had late leads. So they never had to do that. It's tough. I hate it so bad. If it's the second half, I saw a stat that it might have been Arsenal. But there was like 50 minutes of gameplay in the 90-minute game. Yeah. That's a lot. That's a lot. Yeah. That part you might have gotten from us because the NFL, I think it's like 11 minutes. It's crazy. But in soccer, it's like you come to expect more than that. Like 50 minutes is borderline like you're not watching that sport. Well, you don't watch it for that, do you? You watch it to see the players speak behind their hands. You know, there's many, many reasons why we come. The crowd shots of large-bellied man with Newcastle around there, freezing their bits off. I mean, there's lots of reasons you watch this crap. I mean, it's the culture. It's all of it. What about soccer with no offsides? How awesome would that be? Sky's cherry-picking? I think, you know what? I'm realizing football needs a commissioner. It's what it needs. It needs more invention. I'm vibing on a couple of these things. I mean the the time of the thing is I don't understand either you are not wrong why the referee is such a prick he's like I and only I yeah I mean it is it's like it's like in England we don't have much man we used to have an empire right we had the royal family and I'm just going over it yeah that's not all great we might have had a hand and screw in that one yeah you started it but they definitely they definitely they definitely you didn't say no yeah so I'm not I can't say it but we had that we had Downton Abbey it's over right the Beatles yeah still got the Beatles still got the Beatles always had the Beatles but like so we don't have much and so in England like when you have a tiny bit of power in life you'll find it the whole time like you know if you people who have jobs just love effing other people over when they have a tiny little bit of leverage it's like a tiny it's like a petty and the referee why is the referee the only one who knows how many minutes are left and doesn't tell anybody it's like one of the great vestiges he's like a bouncer or a mall security cop relax man I don't have to tell you I'm a prick I can be a prick I'm being a prick with everybody watching we have no power we have no control I mean it is remarkable man I think just if you made a rule last 20 minutes of the game the clock stops when the ball goes out of bounds clock stops on every foul every penalty what's wrong with that? Have a tense, like in basketball where you can have a five you know what I mean? Like if you're just standing in the corner trying to shield the defenders and not moving you've got to give the ball to the other team We are about to enter an American century of football. Like you guys are only just turning your mind to it in every way Like JJ Watt last night there's this, VAR is the where they kick the refereeing decisions. It's like when the NFL guys go to the sidelines. It's still very bumpy. It takes forever. It takes a long, long time. JJ's team was just effed over at the weekend, and he just belted out live on time. The owners in England say nothing. They never speak. They never do any. JJ's like, VAR's terrible. The rule should be, if it's not clear and obvious, it shouldn't take longer than 60 seconds. VAR should be 60 seconds. And it's all over the English papers today. They're just like, Burnley owner, JJ, what has a new idea. All of this stuff. Well, this is what we do as Americans. If we can't win, we're going to change the rules. Yes. We have to change the rules. Yes. The sport is stupid. We have to change the rules. Until we win. We will find the balance. Yeah, and then we take so much pride once we do. Yeah, they were like, we did it. It was nuts. I have never felt more optimistic about the future. We lose. It's unfair. Then when we change the rules, we win, and then we just rub it in the power. Yeah, we tell everyone else, get better. We're the best in the world. We're going to ruin the game, but we're going to win. I've got to tell you that. accept that. I would bite the role off for that one. Absolutely. Alright, well, Roger, it's been awesome. I've got one last question. Again, everyone go buy it. The book is out now. We are the World Cup. A personal history of the world's greatest sporting event. And Roger, it's so, so funny as you heard all this interview. Go buy it right now. Get excited for the World Cup. It's going to be World Cup fever. My last question, Roback question, R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot com. Promo code TAKE. 20% off your first purchase. Q-Zips, polos, Hoodies, joggers, shorts, Roback.com, promo code take. US out. England out. Who's going to win the World Cup? So I'm not... You're not picking against the US. By the way, just... You don't care about England. I don't care about England. You're not picking against... I care about England as much as a Kazakh fan. I just want to be clear. Yeah, you're not picking against the US. Makes me happy because I'm a mum's happy. Yeah, yeah. That's nice. Yes. You're not picking against the US, so we're taking him out of it. Yeah, yeah. Who's going to win the World Cup? If I was a betting man and I still had money left over after all the dog... You're talking to two betting men right now, so be careful. I know, I know, I know. I would put all of my money, big cat. Responsibly. All of it. Responsibly. All of it on. I love Norway, man. Shut up. I just love Norway. I just love it. Do it. By the way, don't think about it. You know the best bets are just impulsive. Yeah, just do it. All the triggers. For Norway, they've not been in the tournament for a generation. Oh, that's great. They've got a talent-soaked squad. And they've got, does the word Erling Haaland mean anything to you? yeah big big thor yeah yeah big bloody thor thor wishes man he's like he's like remember when shack came into the nba and he just like was just different and he was breaking backboards and every night it was just like what did he do early in holland is that is that man he's like just it's like chat gpt created a footballer it's um i mean he is just so powerful so dominant he's quite funny too, the longer he's gone on, the more he's developed a persona, and with him leading this talent school. They're only 25 to 1. I thought it was a lot crazier. Take it. By the way, that's a very odd. They're the ninth best odds. Don't even think. Don't even think, please. If I put your kids to college, big cat, it's all I can do to repay you for your generosity, your spirit, and your joy, and all that crap. Best bets are just impulsive, man. Go on. The other one helped that Italy is 30-1 and they're not even in it. Not in. Yeah. They could be, though. They might be. Now, Norway, Spain, France. Anyone but England, baby. Anybody, anybody, anybody. The U.S. is 65-1. The other one we've got to know, because when we just hop into sports, we have to know what's the narrative around it. Is there a guy that hasn't won the big one? Is there a guy in soccer that's been annoying as one of the greatest players in the world, but for whatever reason, they've stoked in the World Cup? there is one and one man only and his name is christian politic no it's ronaldo yeah yeah pinaldo yeah we call him pinaldo yeah i mean he's like i was in um in the euros the european tournament in ukraine in 2012 and i couldn't get a hotel room um i had to sleep in uh in the street overnight and then the next day the hotel came out and said hey we've got a room for you i was like cool again portugal just lost the whole team have left the hotel and i got ronaldo's route and I walked in and like the air was like dangerously it was dangerously it wasn't like just a tiny hint it was like thick with dracon noir and I slept there I slept there for two nights and genuinely for about 14 months after that I smelt unbelievable and everyone I shook hands with smelt of Cristiano and Albert's heel and I was just like putting his vibe out into the world he's a I mean he's a preening portuguese like a show pony he hasn't won the big one he's not and it destroyed you know if you ask him get him on the show man yeah i'm on the show because you when you're in like really fit mood that's what you remind me of man oh really yeah i think you have a lot a preening show pony yeah like eight eight abs man yeah and he's like um i wonder when you do get him on this couch on your casting couch that you you were if you ask him what would he like what pisses him off more that he's never won it as a hyper competitive person or that leonor messi just did yeah and i bet you genuinely yeah he'll tell you that he's never won it but it will be oh yeah like the thing that makes him scream into the abyss and like angry and extra almond at night sometimes is that That little bastard. And he's better than him, yeah. Way better, yeah. Ronaldo's not even the best Ronaldo. No. He's like the third best Ronaldo. Yeah. It's what you must feel like about Colin Coward, right? It's like that kind of like that level of like... Yeah, I mean, you got Ronaldo, then you got Fat Ronaldo, then you got Ronaldinho, and then you got Cristiano. He's the fourth best Ronaldo. God, this is real knowledge. And Ronaldinho had another name. I can't remember what it was. He got... Jar Jar Binks. Do you talk about the Ronaldo conspiracy theories, the Brazilian fat Ronaldo in this book? I think. God, you've got incredible knowledge. I love this man. Does he like football? No. But does he like conspiracy theories? Yummy, yummy. Is that what it is? Yes. Go buy the book. It is. It's all in there, mate. It's a good... I answer. I get to the bottom of it. Good theories about the 98 World Cup. It was the man on the grassy knuckle. That's who did it. That's who did it. Splash Nike. Yes, it was actually. It was. All right. Roger, thank you. You're the best, and we'll have you back on during the World Cup. Big cut. You're a gorgeous human being. What do you do for football? He can't even say his straight face. Oh, man. Love. All right. Thank you. Roger Bennett was brought to you by Microsoft 365 Copilot. Before we get into the rest of the chaos, we have to tell you about something that helps people focus on what's most important. That's Microsoft 365 Copilot. The world moves fast. your workday moves even faster. Pitching products, drafting reports, analyzing data, Microsoft 365 Copilot is your AI assistant for work built into Word, Excel, PowerPoint, and other Microsoft 365 apps that you use, helping you quickly write, analyze, create, and summarize so you can cut through the clutter and clear paths to your best work. Learn more at Microsoft.com slash M365 Copilot. It's Microsoft.com slash M365 Copilot. and Fyre Fest of the Week is going to be brought to you by Morgan & Morgan. You wouldn't hire your backup quarterback to close out the Super Bowl. Hiring the wrong people can be disastrous. That's where Morgan & Morgan comes in. If you're ever injured by the negligence of another, Morgan & Morgan is America's largest injury law firm for a reason. They've been helping people with their own Fyre Fest for over 35 years. They have over 100 offices nationwide and more than 1,000 lawyers. They've got over $30 billion recovered for over 500,000 clients. Morgan & Morgan has a proven track record of fighting to get you full and fair compensation. If you're ever injured, you can check out Morgan & Morgan. Their fee is free unless they win. For more information, go to forthepeople.com slash PMT or dial poundlaw, pound 529 from your phone. That's forthepeople.com slash PMT or dial poundlaw. That's pound 529. This is a paid advertisement. This is a, what, six-year firefest in the making? Oh, no. Spiders? I didn't know spiders, not in season yet. I think I have a good spider defense system. Which is, I just have, like, my dad got me, like, spray this big thing of spider, and it sprays, so I just do that every day. So your dad went to Home Depot for you? We just, I had, he just ordered from me. It was a nice gift from my dad. Shout out to my dad. He's upgraded the spider defense unit at his house. What? He got the iron dome. No, I'm not, like, your dad. I had, I had. Your dad made a great move. I'm saying like you could have gone and gotten that. I had some stuff myself and my dad was just sent me a better version of what I had. He was like, oh, yeah. Yeah, it was a kind gesture. The iron foam. Yeah. I didn't go to the dentist since before COVID and I went a few weeks ago and then I went yesterday and had to get like a crown put in and like three fillings and it was just a horrible experience. one of the worst three hours of my life. The dental assistant, I'm not going to roast them, but it was just a horrible experience, and the whole time I was like, I just, you know, it's the classic, if you just go every six months, it wouldn't be that bad. But if you wait forever and then go, it's way worse, and it was. I should probably go, I should probably go back at some point, but they're just going to tell me that I need to have four wisdom teeth out. And I kind of don't want to hear that news, but go ahead, roast them. Why aren't you roasting? I don't know. It was just, they were like, it was just, it was like, it's going to take two hours. They're like, all right, it's 10 minutes left. You're pretty much done. They just have to put this little crown temporary thing in. And she tried like four times. And then I could tell that she was getting flustered. And it was one of those awkward moments where like she was. She tried to put it in? She was like. She couldn't put it in. She couldn't. She failed like four times. She was putting it in and then had to pull it out. And she put it in again? Put it in again. Was she getting there at any point? No, and she wasn't talking either. There was a silent... That is awkward. She didn't give you like, this never happens to me? No, and she wasn't. Yeah, she was like, this should have been quicker, but I just can't do it. And were you like, can you tell me? And I was like, don't worry, I got time. I can wait. But it was awkward, and then eventually the dentist had to come over and just do it. Oh, so somebody else had to do it. Yeah, she finished the job. Oh. The dentist was a woman. The dentist was a woman. And so was the other dentist. Yep. Assistant. Yeah. But yeah, it just... I mean, it's not like breaking news. The dentist fucking sucks. Sucks! Mm-hmm. It's like... It was just a bad experience. This is one of my ideas. We've got to put the dentist on airplanes. So you just kill two birds with one stone. It's like, hey, I have to go somewhere. I'm going to be trapped in an airplane. Let me just do the dentist stuff now. What do you think about just a dentist where they knock you out? I'm down for that. Like a treat like surgery. Yeah. I actually. I don't think they do that, unfortunately. They might. I actually, I still have to go back. I just, it was my left side. I still have stuff to do on my right side. And you can ask. And they were like, there's something you can do to get taken out. She also said I was like the bravest, strongest boy she's ever had. Wow. She doesn't say that to everyone. That's awesome. There's no chance she says that to everyone. She's like, wow, you're so brave. She gave me a lollipop after that? You need a sticker? Did you look at the fish in the tank in the lobby? No. You're the bravest boy we've had. Oh, you get the sheriff's bag? Yeah. Yeah, that just sucks. That just sucks. It does. I'm happy you got the spiders figured out. Thoughts and prayers. We'll see. I'm not speaking too soon. It's not spider season. I've got to wait for the warm. When do you... I guess they're warm. I don't know where they are, but they're not... You've got to get to where they're at. It'll probably be like when we come back from Arizona, once it's like a week or so of warm weather. But I'm saying you've got to go bomb their house. You've got to get them like they got Ayatollah. Yeah. No, the problem is there's just parts that I can't access. I've talked about this before. Way too much. There's cracks that you can't get to. No, there's just, yeah, I have a balcony where I can just secure the perimeter, but then there's like a window in my bedroom that I can't get to the outside, and I can just see them. I've got an idea. Can you look up what spiders love to build their nests in? Well, the craziest thing. You can create an environment on your desk. They fly from across the lake. They fly from Indiana. Spiders fly across the lake. You guys said Indiana spiders that land on your balcony? Yes. Look, I've looked it up. They fly from across the lake? Yes. That's one of those things I want to make fun of. That's why there's so many spiders on the lake. Well, across the lake wouldn't be Indiana, but yeah. Like Michigan. They're flying from Michigan? It could be Indiana, too. A little bit, but that's not across. I mean, we got bears moving to Indiana. We could have spiders moving back to Chicago. That's why, because I'm like, why the fuck are there so many spiders? And it's common all across. What are these spiders called? I'm not sure. Flying spiders? I'm just Googling spiders flying across Lake Michigan. Okay. The balloon spider? Yeah, that's what it is. Oh. Balloon spiders? They might balloon. Fly. Do balloon spiders fly? Spiders use silk to fly by a process called ballooning. Young spiders usually balloon, typically disperse after hatching. Wow. Never knew that, Hank. Yeah. So it's not out. That's scary. It's all buildings within proximity to the lake. Because they're like little drones. Yes. You're getting drone strikes. Yes. So, yeah. There's always a threat. Like, it's not. The war's never over. The second you let your guard down is the second they come back. Yeah. And you just have to have a spot where when they land, it's like the shit they don't want to land on, so they go to someone else. Stay vigilant. Yeah. All right, PFT, you were Fyre Fest? I had a pretty good week. Really good week, actually. But I made one big mistake yesterday, which was I was a little bit hungry at work, and I went to the closet, our snack closet, which is wonderful. I'm glad that we are lucky enough to work in an office where we have ample snacks, and I'm trying to eat a healthy snack this time. And so I'm looking to see what we have. I ate one of the birthday cake flavored protein bars yesterday in the afternoon. And I've never farted as much in my entire life in the 18 hours since I ate that thing as I have now. What else did you eat? I had meatball soup for dinner last night. That could be. I'd say that. It's turkey meatball soup. That's number one. You think turkey meatball soup? I eat soup almost every day. if anyone has a gut that can process... Meatball soup sounds like a fart. But there was no... It's a fart factory. Why? Eating a fart is protein. I understand, but meatball soup... No, and a protein bar is protein. Yeah. That's true. That's a clear point. But this is like... Listen, turkey meatballs... Turkey meatballs are good. They won't make me fart. No, no, no, no. Meatball soup is delicious. I'm not saying against meatball soup. If I eat meatball soup, I'm expecting to fart. Okay, all right. Put your money where your mouth is. Eat two of these protein bars, And then you tell me if you fart. Well, no, I got to eat the meatball soup first. You had it? Yeah, I had this exact thing. Did you fart a lot? I think you said you had meatball soup too. No, I didn't have meatball soup. But I did have one of the protein bars, yeah. Did you fart more than normal? I don't think so. We also went to 13 fast food restaurants on Tuesday night. That is true. I've also had some of those. You're the only one who didn't puke. I've had like a protein cookie before that's made me fart a bunch. But I'm telling you, like there was a point in the middle of the night last night when I woke up in bed and I farted pretty much nonstop for about two minutes. I want the meatball soup. This is how sweet meatball soup. It was so good. I want the meatball soup. I thought it looked good. I'd like to try the meatball soup to see if it's... I think I should order something. Yeah. You want to get some meatball soup? Can you get us some? Yeah. All right. We'll monitor the situation. Yeah, I would like to see if that makes me fart. Listen, it was not the meatball... I'm telling you, it was this protein bar. We'll eat the meatball soup, you eat the protein bar again. I don't want to eat the protein bar again. You don't eat the protein bar. I'm telling you, like, there was about, honestly, about a 10-hour stretch where I didn't go longer than 30 seconds without farting. I want the most meatball. It was the craziest thing of ever. It sounds like fat. Like, smelly ones or just like? No. Toots. No. Just like, it was constant tooting last night. The meatball soup is the Tim Robinson hot dog. It's like, we're all trying to find the guy who did this. It's not the meatball. You guys are fixated on the meatball soup. I think it's a pretty standard healthy dinner. Turkey meatball. I'm on Vietnam. I love meatball. I love meatball. I'm just going to say meatball or anything. Yeah, turkey meatball. Masks can't be... Yes, you can. Turkey meatball and broth. We're saying you have to recuse yourself. Turkey meatball and broth. We say meatball poison. You're like, I'll try it. Meatball, no. Meatball soup, good. I like meatball soup. I'm not knocking meatball soup. I'm just saying I would most likely fart if I had meatball soup. If you fart when you have meatball soup, then you fart when you have anything. We're talking chicken broth, turkey meatballs. There was cauliflower gnocchi from Trader Joe's. Those are good. Really good. There was gnocchi. Call me. Gnocchi is fart. Cauliflower gnocchi. Fart. That sounds like a fart. Does cauliflower make you fart? Gnocchi does. Yes, cauliflower is well known to cause gas and farting in many people. Okay, could have been the cauliflower. Could have been the cauliflower. As a cruciferous vegetable. It contains high amounts of fiber and a complex sugar called raffinose, which the body struggles to digest, leading to a fermentation in the gut. It also contains sulfur compounds that can produce sulfur. I think if you asked... If you asked... Everything makes you fart. Yeah, everything makes you fart. Look up, do protein bars make you fart? Because I guarantee you that's a yes. Yeah, everything makes you fart, but... Yeah, protein bars frequently cause gas, bloating, flatulence. Sugar alcohol is in there. This is, what's a random, I think everything makes you, I think if we ask. What foods don't make you fart? Yeah, good question. Someone throw food out there. Carrots? Celery. Chicken, fish, eggs, but that's cap. Eggs make me fart the worst. Well, they smell like a fart. Yeah. Carrots can cause gas. That was a little less. That's worded a little less than the others. Quinoa. It turns out that just life makes you fart. All right. Rice generally does not cause gas. So rice, no farts. It's like what you feed your dog when they have an upset stomach. Yeah. Like boiled rice and pumpkin and just like boiled beef. Are you getting the meatball soup, Hank? We've got to get the name of the place once the show ends. Okay. Okay. I think you made it, PFT. We're going to. Oh, you made it? I made homemade meatball soup. All right, can we just order some meatball soup, though? I got leftovers. I'd just like to order some meatball soup. I'll get you one. Now that we're talking about it. I can drive to my house and pick up the meatball soup, and we can experiment. I guess we could experiment. Okay. We'll see. Also, order some backup, just in case. Why? We're ordering a meatball soup. I only need to drive home. We have to have the same meatball soup. If we're honestly making a scientific effort to test this. Right, but order some backup if you don't have enough meatball soup for all of us. There's a lot of meatball soup. All right, so we're good. Okay. You're going to go get it? I'll go get it. All right. Mike's sitting in a room with a microphone. Mm-hmm. And Zach will eat the protein bar. Yeah. I'm in for birthday cake all day. Okay. Okay. Zach eats the protein bar. We eat the meatball soup. My Fyre Fest, I have two. One, first broken bone in my house for my kids. My son broke his wrist, which I – were you guys bone break kids? I was, big time. Broke my bones all the time. You mean like... In elementary school? Yeah, like I broke my wrist multiple times, broke my ankle. Never broke a bone before. Nope. Before last year when I got drunk and, you know. Oh, yeah. You broke your foot. I broke my arm like three times in the course of like two years. So I told him, I was like, look. That's how my ambidextrousness started. Yeah, I broke my leg in second grade. Yeah. And so like he was obviously nervous because he was like, you know, for a little six-year-old, you're just like, fuck, this sucks. I broke my arm, and I was just like, look, dude, I broke my arm a ton when I was a kid, and look how rich I am. And he was just like, what? That's a good point. Yeah, but no, it quickly went from this sucks to you forget that a broken bone in elementary school is the biggest news possible. Like, the whole school is like, can we see his cast? It's kind of a flex. Yeah, he's loving the attention. He's just like, this is awesome. He's got the cast. They also, did you notice they make waterproof casts now that have to get wet. Oh, so you don't even have to give up the pool in the summertime. Nothing. That rocks. It actually is bad if he doesn't get it wet every day. That rocks. Isn't that insane? They've come a long way with casts. The worst part by far of breaking your leg or your ankle or your foot is trying to figure out how to take a bath or a shower. Yeah. Because it's impossible. And it just smelled. I remember it smelled so bad when you would take it off. Yeah. It would eventually. We just put a fucking garbage bag over my cast and shower. Oh, yeah. It was definitely still getting wet. Yes. You should have the doctor. Is he going to get surgery? No. You should have the doctor do his surgery and tighten up the ligaments so he can throw fast. Yeah. It was also his offhand. He's a lefty, so he broke his right wrist. That's not bad. Kids heal so fucking fast, it's insane. If I broke my wrist right now, I'd be out for months. Yeah. It's also a good time to break out. way better than the summer. Yeah, I told him that. I was like, you're going to be in a cast for a month. You'll be fine. Honestly, it makes the second half of the school year fly by. Again, he walked in with us. He had the Vince McMahon walk into school today. He went from Monday, he got the temporary cast, and then Wednesday he got the hard cast, and he was like, check this thing out. The other thing, my kids are in that age where they're starting to learn about death and everything, and it's a lot of questions about death. and we were in the car the other day, my whole family, so it was me, my wife, and my three kids in the backseat. I've talked about it a little bit before, but my wife's mother passed away a few years ago from ALS. Really sad. Please support ALS research. But either way, we were talking about it, and my son's like, hey, so your mom, when she died, how old was she? My wife was like 67, and then my daughter just goes, 67, right in her face. I was like, God damn it. It was just the perfect timing. Couldn't help but laugh. Yeah. The 6-7 of your dead mom is crazy. Yeah, it's funny. Crazy. It's her grandmother. Yeah. It's your 6-7 to death. It's like the most possible inappropriate usage of it, but the fact that it was from such an innocent place makes it the funniest thing ever. Oh, we both cracked up very hard. They were just like, why are you laughing? It's like, forget it. Don't worry about it. Zach. My firefifest this week is So we spent a significant amount of time In the golf simulator for the stream last week It was me, Hank, and Max I've never been more frustrated At a day here since then It was the most frustrated I've ever been So I spent this last week Probably three different YouTube sessions Just kind of Googling How do you swing a golf club? How does this work? There's got to be a way to do better than we did there Because I know similar golf is easier than regular golf So I can't even imagine what those swings look like In real life IRL. And I'm coming to the conclusion that, like, I know you've got to be – golf's an adult thing. To be an adult male, you need to be semi-competent on the golf course. And I don't think I'm ever going to be able to do that, and it's never been more infuriating. I just think I'm cooked as an adult male. I don't think I'll ever have the opportunity to be a golfer. I've never seen Zach as angry as I saw him. And, like, we took a little sidebar at one point. Ice cream break? Yeah, ice cream break. he was legitimately furious about how poorly you were doing in the Sims. So Zach, here's the positive spin zone. It's not like you joined a golf podcast. That's true but I feel like we've frequented a lot of golf. That's the thing. That's not true. Zach, have you thought about maybe Mayo Sox just cures everything? We put Mayo Sox on the table the other day via Twitter. It didn't reach what we needed for the mayo feet. I'll dip my feet into anything probably. It's the most emasculate. I felt small in the golf. I've never felt that small in my kind of life. You're not small. You're not small. And also the beauty of golf is you don't have to be good at golf. You just have to be good at hanging. If you can be an enjoyable hang while you golf poorly, it's still going to be a good experience. No, as a bad golfer, you've got to be terrible. You've got to be a little good. Yeah. You feel like a fucking asshole when you're out there, and everyone else is moving down the course. That's why when I golf with my friends that are good, I just don't even play half the holes. Yeah, that's fine. That's fine. But it's not fun. But, yeah, you've got to. It depends on your attitude, too. Nothing's worse than you. If you're stuck and you're an energy vampire. Yeah, you can't be an energy vampire. You can't be the guy. If you're the guy that sucks, you have to know that you're the guy that sucks. Correct. Yeah. Yeah, I don't play half of my shots. Yeah. I'm just like, I'm not going to get that. Max, you don't have a great time when you hit the bad shots, but when you hit those sick drives, you're like, that was fucking awesome. Yeah. And that's why I always say, and I believe it more. The more people I talk to that play golf at a high level, I genuinely think the best golfer that you can be is, like, if you shoot a 90. That is the most fun you can have golfing possibly because all the good shots feel amazing. The bad shots are just like, whatever, I suck, so who cares? If you shoot a 90, that's the most fun. If you shoot in the 70s consistently, you're miserable when you play golf because you miss so many shots. Or anything that's like borderline not a great shot, you beat yourself up over. Yeah, like if you can shoot in the 70s and you shoot like an 81, you've had a terrible day. Terrible day. It'll ruin your week. What's the fun in that? But if you usually shoot like a 95 and you shoot a 90, you had the best time ever playing golf that day. I agree. I would just like to break 100. Is it because that's exactly where I'm at is already? Or realistically break 50 on a nine-hole because I'm more of a nine-hole guy. Yeah, we're nine-hole guys. Big time. I don't even know if you can get excited about the good shots when you're a bad golfer. Because you know it was an accident. You're like, what if I just do that every time? You're like, that's the one that keeps you coming back. You know it was an accident. Like, I didn't really mean to do that. No, you can get excited. You feel like maybe this is – like, every time I hit a good shot on a golf course, I'm like, I'm never hitting a bad shot again. Like, that's it. Something clicked. You figured it out. Yeah, it's over. I'm one step away from the pros. The YouTube searches went so poorly. My last search was like, how do you cheat in golf? The easy sport to cheat. Oh, yeah. Actually, Zach, we should get, I meant to order that club a while ago. The one that you hold up to it and you press a button. Ask Kittle. Kittle's been using it. Yeah? Yeah, because he's hurt. We got to get you. Cabo and he just had one of those. Yeah, he's got the one that shoots it, yeah. I'm going to do it right now. Yeah, we'll get you one of those. Max, you have a Fyre Fest from Tuesday night, so we did the Doug Doug Challenge. Second year in a row, Max and I did it. Nine of us went to 13 restaurants and had to order the thing right before, the exact order the person right before us was in the drive-thru, and it was... Doubled. Doubled, and we had so much food, puked everywhere. How are you feeling? Diet? Uh, yeah, I am, my fire fest about that is that I, I felt like, okay. Like, I ate so much food, and I was like, I should feel worse than I did. Like, I ate so much food that night, and it hasn't really, like, I just had a normal day yesterday. Yeah, I missed the camaraderie with the boys. It was fun. It was fun. And it's also like just moments that you're never like we got to Taco Bell and we got discovery boxes, which are there. It's like two chalupas, a burrito, chips and all this stuff. And I was, I ate the chalupas. No problem. I was struggling with the burrito because it wasn't, I didn't like it. And Max just looked at me. He's like, you're full. Give me that burrito. And he just took it off my hands. Like a fucking, just, just a great teammate. I got this. Yeah. Cause I, you could see it in my face. Like, I don't like this burrito. He ain't have it. He's my brother. It was like wet. It's not, it wasn't good. I mean, last one, you have Firefest? No, my week was sick. You sure? Yeah. Nothing you tweeted? Maybe a little, didn't let anything settle a little bit? Settle? Yeah, like Lou Holtz dying? Oh. Yeah, my bad, Lou. All right, Hannah, I approve this. I approve the tweet. Okay, what was the tweet for the people who missed it? The tweet was, Lou Holtz just passed away, And then Memes tweeted, the meme of the guy stopped by my biggest haters funeral. And he said, this is from Ryan Day. Yeah, Ryan Day right now. A little quick, a little quick on the draw. It's probably like five seconds after he died. Yeah, but Memes and I had a little discussion. And we just ran through a bunch of simulations about like, you know how they have people that write obituaries. They have them ready to go just in case people pass away. Yeah. Like we did some simulation drills on like celebrities that die. Memes quick, what do you tweet out about this guy? and he was doing really, really good. And then Hank came in and Hank actually, Hank beat memes at the simulated obituary meme game. That's crazy. Yeah. Did you see some of the obituaries? I think it was maybe Robert Redford. The obituary writer had died 10 years prior. A long time ago. Yeah. But this one was, I think, what did we simulate? Goodell? Like Roger Goodell passes away and then Hank chimes in immediately. He goes, NFL players right now and it's all the soldiers reading the magazine that says Hitler dead. He just fucking beasted on memes right in his face. Good one. Out memes him. Yeah. Okay, good show, boys. Numbers. Someone going to get it? Eight. No, two. Twenty-three. I'll go 85. Fifty-six. I've just read these comments. A lot of the people in the comments are defending you. You'll be like, this shit's hilarious. I didn't think it was happening. I also think that anybody... 86. He's kind of been dead for a couple... I know. He wasn't that bad. He's old. 80 plus, like you had a great run. Right. I think jokes, just let them fly. 23. Yeah, Lou would have loved that. All right, everyone say their number. Two. For two sandwiches. 85. Someone's got to get going on this machine. 56. 45 Anyone? Anyone? One more? One more? One more Eight One more Same numbers Two Twenty-three Two This would break my heart If it was You want to break your heart? It was you first Who first? 82 82 Oh, shit So close. Tuesday. So close. Happy birthday. Why does he keep saying you put your sandwich? Oh, happy birthday to Kyle Trask. How about that? Happy birthday, Kyle Trask and Harriet Tubman. And Shaq. Love you guys. There we go. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.