Ontonio Kareem Lived a Double Life

Wave. Just the worst guy. Just living two different lives like I was in a black fraternity. Turned up, cool, and then I would sneak off and be with the white philosophers. Let me pop out when I want to pop out. Seriously, I'm trying to pop out twice a year, bro. Yeah? Twice a year. You did Fallon in the first like two weeks of the year. So you've got one down. The rest of the year, you've got one more appearance. I'll see y'all in June, man. It was Fallon, right? Fallon, yeah. I didn't make that up. You just did Fallon. I just did Fallon. How was it? It was great, man. Yeah? It was great. My mom flew out. Dad flew out. Cool. Two best friends flew out, man. I cried. Aw, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was cool, man. I had a little beautiful moment, man. So it was fun. For a brief second, when you said mom flew out, dad flew out, two best friends, I thought you were referring to them as your two best friends, and I was like, I was about to cry. I was like, that must be the coolest thing in the world for them to hear. That would have been kind of corny if I was just like, my two best friends. No, I would have loved that. Are you kidding me? No, man, it was beautiful, dude. I had, like, hood niggas in Fallon's studio. Just two dreadheads in there, like, listening to Chief Keep. It was great, bro. There's a feeling, a different feeling, but a similar one that I have as, like, I just grew up really poor in Missouri. so I'm often in these spaces and I'm like we were never supposed to be in here I know that about you man the one time I talked to you like we had a conversation on the street you like got a hood reference I said and I was like Caleb what the fuck like we got mutual friends but I'm like Caleb really know about this shit bro that was crazy it's a funny thing I never like there's a funny thing that happens a lot I don't know if I've talked about it on here before or not I've talked about it somewhere but there's a funny thing that happens a lot where people that are not white will talk about they'll be like oh my god growing up x everybody knows why and and a thing will be said that i'm like it's not my business to engage in that so i keep out of it but a lot of those things i'm like oh actually we're talking about being poor you know what i mean no real talk i like a lot of things like someone will be like i had a friend uh in college once and this was when i learned to like keep my mouth shut they're like oh my god growing up mexican we always i don't even remember what it was but like something in the household and i was like oh no we had that too yeah and they were like oh that's not really the point and i was like right right right i was like no my bad my bad my bad me too yeah yeah this isn't really for you even if that's the case yeah i was like okay no worries no let the poor whites who's gonna think of the poor white people we had a few poor whites in my neighborhood man shout out gauge man gauge what's up dude i'm shouting out gauge yeah give Gage some love for once. You grew up in Chicago. I grew up in Chicago. I spent half the time in the city, like Southside and then South Suburbs. So half the time as in you moved or half the time as in you were going back and forth? I was going to see my dad and then I was going where I liked it with my mom. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Was dad in the city or mom in the city? Dad was in the city. Mom was in the burbs. Gotcha. But the burbs were not good. What do you mean? I was in Chicago Heights, which is like a terrible place. Yeah, of course. Yeah, but it was fun. It was ratchet. It was good. Why did you like mom's house better than dad's house? Resources. No, same. Going to my dad's house was war. Bro, my dad had one, just a loose couch. Yes. I slept next to a weight bench. Yes. I was like, dad, bro. Even as a young kid, I'm like, we got to get some decorating done. You can't just be sleeping like this. I'm telling you. My dad, same thing. My mom had a home with like, I had a room and it's where I lived. I went to my dad's house. He didn't, there was, he moved a lot, but there was a period of like four years where he lived in one place. I didn't have a bedroom. So I slept in the kitchen. No. And you're thinking, you're thinking, oh, he put a bed in the kitchen. No. I slept on the floor in the kitchen. Pallets? Like a little like air mattress and a sleeping bag. Your pops a little while? No, he's dead. Okay. So be nice. No, I'm kidding. That's crazy. Yeah, dad. Dad. Well, you know who's to say. But the thing is, it's not like he slept nice either. He slept on a really shitty 20-year-old mattress that he just happened to have. He just didn't. All my dad wanted to do was play video games and drink. Damn, Caleb, we had the same daddy. Yeah, let's rock on. Rock on. Yeah, shout out. Oh, yeah, you know what? Man, my dad, it was just like that. As a kid, it was fun because we would wake up and my dad was obsessed with like kung fu movies. So we would just wake up and watch Kung Pao all day. Hell yeah. I didn't know he was high until I got a little older. He's like in this way more than I am. What's going on? Fuck with this kung fu shit, bro. Just a high ass dude. Just with a little baby kid. And we just watched kung fu. And that was our relationship for like four or five years. That's sweet. Yeah, it was cool. That's nice. He was fun. I mean, he's the reason I'm fun, I think. Yeah. Because my mom was like, when you go, the repercussions of having a home and nice shit is that there's rules and regulations and shit. They go hand in hand. Yeah. Which is unfortunate. Yeah. Yeah. It's really unfortunate to have rules. Yeah. I feel like you get to be ratchet around dad and then mom, you got to fucking button up. Yeah. So I had that daikon. Wait, so your parents weren't together your whole? No, no, no. Off a real? They were, yeah, they worked at the same factory. And my mom got broken up with or got out of a relationship. And my dad was in a relationship with someone. They hooked up one time and she got pregnant with me. What? And then she was like, I'm going to keep the kid. And then I'm, I don't know if my dad said, please don't. But that was definitely the vibe was like, please do not have that kid. What are you doing? Yeah. He was like, for real? And she was like, yeah. My mom already had a kid. So she was like, fuck it. One more. and my dad was like, I'm not interested in being involved in that. And then he came back around. Oh, that's fine. At least he came back around. You know what? That's how I feel. I'm like, good for him. He did the best he could. Hey, man, look. I'm going to dip on my kids at some point. No, no, I'm not. I'm getting the fuck out of there. I'm going to need six months at least. Fuck off time. PTO time. Yeah, six months of me time. Let the kid figure things out with mom. He's fine, bro. Hopefully, I really hope I get to have Nepo babies. Black Neppo babies, man I really want that I want my kids to be fucking Go anywhere y'all want to Fucking step around, shit on people Be jerks, bro I work this hard so my kids can be little assholes That's what I want I really do want that, man Because I feel like It's our turn to have that Because Jaden and them didn't do it well No Jaden is I find him so interesting because he seems so melancholy about it. He seems pretty sad about the situation. I'm like, Jaden, he's always like crying and stuff. I'm like, life's pretty good, Jaden. What's going on? No. Do you know what I'm saying? Like, every time he pops up, he's like weeping and saying, like his Instagram captions are like, none of us make it out of this thing alive. Enjoy. And he's like teary eyed. I'm like, you're doing good, brother. Jaden, stop crying. No, bro. What are you sad about? That is the best point I've heard about Jaden. What's wrong? Oh, just on a yacht, like, man, what does it all mean? Brooding. Brooding on the super yacht. Yeah, I get that. No, I don't want no Jadens. I want Willows, though. Yeah, she's cool. She's fire. And she's talented as hell. That little album, the Brown album when she got the afro? Yeah. I don't know what it is, but that's the best album I've heard in a long time. You can't deny it. She's a beast. And she do the armpit hair. She out here living her best life. Well, you know she's talented. She's got the armpit hair. She's not shaving the legs. She free. Yeah. I love it. I love to see it. And she seems happy. I like it for her. She does, yeah. Now, Jaden, my nigga, come give me a hug, dog. Let's hang out. We should get Jaden over here just to hug him. I would hang out with him. He seems cool. He seems, yeah. He seems a little sad. I could cheer him up. Have fun. I think you're a cozy guy. Oh, yeah. We'll hang out. We'll have a good time. I'll remind him of how good his life is. I'll be like, relax. Everything's cool. Everything's handled. You tell him about the factory that your parents are in. Yeah, my parents worked at a factory. I mean, I will say, actually, like, I think if I was born into extreme wealth and, like, perfect circumstances, I think I would be very set. Like, I don't think, because then what is their, I don't know, it just almost feels like your agency is removed. It's just like, oh, you're set for life. I think it's just his parents. Yeah. Well, there's something going on. I think if we was born with just some nameless, faceless, rich people, we'd be fine. But you got Will Smith in there fucking just dancing and rapping and shit. My dad is a dork, bro. Will Smith has destroyed his legacy, dog. Yeah, but the Red Table Talks, long before the Oscars thing, things were slipping out. Things were slipping out. It was cracks already. Jada was saying things every once in a while that I was like, wait, what? So y'all had August in here? I was like, what? What? Yeah. Yeah, you're right. Nobody's dissected this for real, for real. I feel like we talked about it on the surface, but it was cracks a long time ago. There were cracks. It would also be crazy, like, to watch your mom play that role and set it off. Like, can you imagine watching one of your parents play that role? No, bro. Like, that's crazy. Yeah. Flip on the TV. Struggle braids Truly like fucking the guy for the check Having a parent as an actor Tears while you holding on Crazy Crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy And then your dad doing the cabbage patch on Nick Your dad's a clean rapper You gotta get school supplies That's it AJ, I understand why you Yeah, you know what? I take it all back. It makes sense. We got empathy for you. Wait, is your dad showing you Kung Fu movies how you got into Jiu-Jitsu? Maybe. Yeah, so I have a stepdad who pretty much raised me from three, but I think the shit my dad showed me, he was like a fucking... Dad was like the conspiracy theorist. Really? Yes. He's the first guy? The first one. He's the prime mover on conspiracy theories? The general dog. this dude man i think he's the reason i'm kind of because my mom's just a black mom she's just trying to make sure i'm like successful this dude we would go to bible study and we'll come back from bible study and he'll be like so what you think about jacob's ladder what do you think about that the intensity of this impression even yeah for real bro and and you are six years old bro he'd be like what you think about jacob's ladder i'm like i guess god showed him a beam of light He was like, it was a spaceship. I'm like, yo, I'm trying to watch anime, dog. Then he'll flip and he'll go through it and be like, it says a wheel of fire. What does that remind you of? I'm like, all right, bro. Just a couch floating in an empty room at his house. Just sitting in town. A TV this big. Dog, it was a weird place to be at six, dog. And I would go to school and have to just pretend that I believed in God the same way everybody else did. I think God has a flying saucer, though. Yeah. You have to go to school with all these sheep that don't know the truth. They don't fucking get it, though. Y'all fucking walking around here. You idiots. Fucking dumbass. I almost envy you guys. Yeah, I wish I was ignorant, though. Because you don't have to know what I know. Man, that's a big ass. He was OG Flat Earth, OG Anunnaki. You know the Anunnaki? No, what is that? Oh, Jesus. What is Anunnaki? Oh, my God. All right. Oh, shit. Teach me. Yeah, put me on. Anunnaki is supposed to be this race of aliens that came. This is, I'm already interested. No, no, this has got to go in. Race of aliens that came. They're fourth dimensional aliens, right? they're meant to they're basically angels they're meant to watch over human beings some of them got a little spicy came down here made it with human women fuck created she created created giants god didn't like that yeah flooded earth oh noah yeah oh fuck then we know that once he killed all the giants the anunnaki created this form of from the remaining humans that were here who were like savages. Yeah. Implanted their DNA into us, created this version of humans. Yeah, regular size. Yeah, regular size. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or fun size compared to no one. Yeah, the giants, yeah. And that's where we think. Like our idea of what we're worshiping is really like false gods. Yeah. There's one true God and then there's like these dimensional beings and that's what he like taught me. I flubbed that but it is that's the gist of it it's like all the Bibles all the religions are based on these Anunnaki creatures because that's why they all kind of follow the same storyline so there's like these being like Thoth and Egypt is basically Jesus now I'm listening to you but I want you to know I just saw a painting in Madrid okay that it's called The Fall of the Giants it was painted in 1636 I liked it so much I took a picture of not only the painting, but also the little description. And I got in trouble because I didn't know you were supposed to take pictures. This woman comes over that works at the museum and she goes, she goes, Espanol or English? And I go, I go, un poco Espanol, but English. And she goes, don't take pictures. And I go, oh, yeah, she nailed it. Like it might be the only sentence she knows in English other than Espanol or English. Don't take pictures. But the description is, Jordan's based himself on a small oil sketch by now in Brussels, inhabitants of the earth. The giants aspired to reach the heavens and were consequently punished by the gods. Oh, Ovid narrated the episode in their fall. Episode of their fall in book one of his metamorphoses. The giants attempted to take the celestial kingdom, piling mountains up to the distant stars. Then the, okay, and then they got destroyed by lightning. But that, I've never heard of that. Oh, then they got destroyed by lightning. But I thought for a second, I was hoping reading the description, it would be like the same thing you were talking about. But it is. I think there's, I believe there's some kind of truth to it, maybe. Like, I do believe in other beings and dimensions and all of that. But I don't know if they were like, if it was a concerted effort to come down here and just fuck on people. Yeah. You know, but I do think there's stories of giants in every religion. it's so funny every time that we like as humans think of other beings like when we think of God or when we think of aliens we always assign to them the same like stupid petty like base things that we have we're like and then they ruin the earth because his lover cheated on him it's like I doubt that they're trafficking in that kind of shit they're horny up there you think they're horny in the sky Yeah, bro. Fourth dimension. I think you get rid of horniness in the fourth dimension. God, I hope so. Me too. What a curse it is. I'm sick of this shit, bro. Being horny? It's ruining everything, dog. No, I need to be put down like a sick dog. Yeah, chop it. Honestly, let's get... We got to evolve past this, bro. Horniness? Horniness. Get it out of here. Get it out of here. It's ruining my weeks. Yeah, how so? I want to get shit done. I'm like, maybe I should call. I'm trying to read Norwegian Wood and I'm like, maybe I'll... You know what? Let me call up. I going to call someone I have no business talking to I don even like this girl but let me call up That was deeply honest what you just said That was deeply honest Because we do I have tried to grow up a little bit In my mid-20s, I would break things off with a guy that I was not interested in. And then I would get horny, you know, three weeks later and call him. And then, of course, like, yeah, we enjoyed hooking up. But that's so irresponsible and, like, mean to know that someone likes you more than you like them. and I have really tried to grow. I almost did it two nights ago. Oh my God. We getting, now we speaking the same. It's like difficult. I didn't know we were the same guy. We're the same guy. Yeah, we are. I struggle to think of a difference. That's my thing. I think I like, I've grown past it too. Like when I turned 30, it kind of, it really shaved off a lot. Yeah. But I'm like, I can't use people to self-soothe. Yeah. Fuck. It's like, yeah, I'm sorry. Fuck. Yeah, we know we're supposed to. Serious time. Whoever needed to hear this, I guess. Yeah, I guess. Damn, no, that's true. But yeah, so I'm trying to get away from that. But the horniness is a problem, man. It's like anything else. Like, I don't drink. I know you don't drink. No, not much. All the homies don't drink, really. Yeah. So I need, no. We need to, you know, we have a problem right now where cannabis, like weed hangout spots, like weed bars and stuff, it's not working. We need like a dive bar that does like cannabis drinks and lets you smoke joints. Yeah, but I think the vibe got to be correct. They still trying to put the club vibe in the weed spot. Cut it out. Cut it out. Get the grass wall out of here. Get the fucking grass wall. Get it out of here. Get the neon. The cursive neon. Dude, dude, dude, dude. Get all that shit out of here. Get the cursive neon the fuck out of here. I need water running over rocks. Yes. I need some smooth shit. Play the Charlie XEX. We can play some tang. Give me one of those little gardens where I rake the sand in a pattern. What are those called? The most obvious name. Dumbass. Let me rake the garden. Let me rake the gardens. Yes, bro. It got to be a vibe. Every smoke spot, a weed comedy show, you been one of those? No. Oh, Caleb. Thank God. Is it bad? ass. Damn. Nobody really wants to be laughing. If I don't know you, I don't want to be laughing around you while I'm high. You ever try to laugh with a stranger when you're high? What's fucking funny? Dude, are you fucking laughing around me, dude? I will fuck you up. Is it the audience's high and you're high? Yeah. The worst combination. Because then you start doing your little inner monologue references and that ain't for everybody. Yeah. I'm like doing memes from Instagram on stage and people like... This guy did not write a single joke. Now he's just like a high brain that's taking him somewhere else. I have never been... It was kind of an interesting thing I noticed in Chicago. I've never been high or drunk on stage. Ever once in my life. Never. I guess I'm not opposed to it for other people. Everyone do your thing. I'm opposed to it for me. Nobody do their thing. Don't do your thing. It's bad. Everyone do my thing. I noticed in Chicago, like when I first got there, everyone was like, a lot of people were getting like ripped to do improv. And I was like, you have to be drunk to do improv? Doing that on improv is scary. Crazy. I can't be under the influence for improv. No, I can't be. I don't want to be high on stage because I need to be so like, I need to be so locked in. Partially, this is because I bet people are better at it because if people have really tight jokes that are like very memorized to the word, that's not my style. I bet that's easier under the influence because it's just in your body I'm very like shifting things around all the time and taking off ramps and picking new like I need to be like actually cognitively present but if you don't I bet it's a lot of fun I'm sure like the white boys I've seen that are very much like Trump and they be fucked up on stage but they just reading the book basically yeah they have like rote memorization and they are just regurgitating. Yeah. Which is a cool, I think it's a cool skill. It's just not the way I do it. I wish, I actually wish I had that. Yeah? A little bit. I wish my pen was a little bit more fucking college APA style a little bit. But me, I feel like me and you are vibes. We get up there, like, and we got jokes, but it's like, we flowing. I'm curating. And if I'm high, I'm up there like, yo, everybody okay? It's okay? That's the counselor in you. Yes. That's the therapist in you. I wish that guy would get out of here. Get him out of here. All the empathy is still there. Get him out of here. Get the counselor guy gone, man. Are you still doing that? No, we've finally done. That's in the past. But yeah, it's like four or five months out from nine to five. Yeah. Yeah. But I'll miss. I'll genuinely like doing it, man. I really do. Like, I wish. I think I'll start an organization and kind of bird's eye it now. Yeah. I don't want to be on the ground no more, bud. I'm not an infantryman. I need general work. Don't send me front line no more. These kids, I love y'all, but y'all, I hope y'all doing well, man. But it's a lost cause. You were a children's counselor. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, for a long time. How'd you get into that? I went to college to be a neuroscientist. UChicago, right? Yeah. Well, UIC, then grad school, UChicago. Nice. Quickly realized I'm not fucking operating on nobody's brain, dog. I got to organic chemistry. I'm like, all right. I'm not going to be in the OR. I'm high in organic chemistry. Like, yeah, okay, cool. And then I switched to psychology and I got really into that. And I was like, at one point doing philosophy and all this. I was a dickhead in college. Really? Just the worst guy. Just living two different lives like I was in a black fraternity. Turned up, cool. And then I would sneak off and be with the white philosophers. I was tripping man But um I realized like I wanted to come back Sneaking off To hang out with white people is so Fucking funny To like secretly hang out with white nerds Is so funny Hey bro anybody who know me knows that's my existence Bro like I sneak off and hang with y'all bro I love y'all man But it needs to be a secret Yeah, it does. That is so fucking funny. Oh, it was so funny. Like, legit in, like, fraternity parties, like, doing a lot of frat shit. And then, like, sneak on and be like, do you read Meditations? Oh, it's great. Having dialect with people. It was just fun. But I realized I wanted to, like, go back to Chicago and kind of change. I had that idea. Like, I'm going to change the hood. We're going to do it, man. We're going to get the kids together. first job I was like oh we can't get these people we can't it's not happening it's not happening with me yeah maybe if I get enough money maybe I could throw money at it but at this point yeah it was um but I did it for a long time and I really enjoy it the kids fuck with me because I'm not like going by the book I would like come in and it would be like this and eventually you do that enough with a kid they'll tell you what's going on you know what I'm saying and then you can work from there but it's trust really trust is everything when you come when it comes to trauma for me yeah yeah so that makes sense what fraternity were you in alpha phi alpha come on yes bro i got first i got in so much trouble one day my friend who was in a black fraternity uh chance you remember this we went to college we went to college together where'd y'all go uh missouri state yeah and i we were at like a tailgate for a football game and i was in a uh fraternity and uh we had like a hand say a joke like a silly hand signal that we like made up it wasn't like a it wasn't an official organizational thing for us and you know the black fraternities have their stuff and i was asking my buddy i was like wait what i can't remember what y'all's thing is and he was like i was like what's your guys's like hand sign and he showed me and then i was like i was like oh it's like this and i went to do it and he and he he literally grabs my hands throws them down like are you fucking crazy and i was like why he was like you'll get both of our asses put that down we had opposite i was sneaking off with the whites i was like oh my bad no it's serious it's very serious we gotta calm down though we but it is not my business but i was very i was very uh upset the whole day i was like fuck i screwed it up i was like i'm in trouble yeah you were i was in trouble i've seen people get beat up about it man it's bad out here yeah i think i had enough goodwill to get away with it for two seconds and that's about it the third second we would have both gotten our asses kick for that but it was i i learned i learned a lot that day yeah yeah it's that serious it's like so the thing is is like black fraternities are different than like i don't know what your fraternity is but it's like i was mine was not a historically black fraternity okay yeah i don't know if you guessed that yeah yeah i kind of guess there are some there's always like one or two white guys shout out brendan right exactly exactly yeah it's uh it's just we take it a little bit more serious because it's like we needed the fraternities yeah and colleges and all of that it's historical whatever i keep making it so serious but it is serious for sure so it was like yeah i'm glad he smacked your hands there was no part of me that argued with it the only thing i thought was why didn't i think of that oh that would have been funnier if you did well what i've seen white dudes do that do what i've seen white dudes try to stroll oh yeah yeah let's get into it yeah i mean And we really are such a humiliating, that's humiliating to hear. It's bad, man. It's so, but it's, I don't know why sometimes it be endearing a little bit and then you'd be like, I cut that off. I'm like, no, this dude's a fucking dumbass. It's not, it's what it, I mean, yeah, I mean, I obviously can't say if it's endearing or not. It's not my place. But I do think the note that I would give a lot of white people is like, everyone that you want to like you will like you more if you just do your thing. no say that to the bro we put piano music behind this dog white dudes gotta understand and this is crazy that they don't know this already but like we just want y'all to be wacky whites bro please just be oh my god we love it when y'all just be white yeah it's fun you come up fucking and not that's the stereotype of white people like when The white dude's like, I have no idea what you're talking about. We're like, yes, you don't. Thank you, bro. That's what we want, man. Stop trying to mesh everything up. Like, let it be separate, man. It's like the heart of it, I know, is that the genuine heart, I know so many white people like this, and I'm like, your heart is that you want this black person or this Mexican person or this Asian person to know that you, you're like, I like you and I want to be friends. but yeah like most people just want you to be authentically yourself yeah and that will get you so much further than trying to like imitate like and also if your truth is yeah i think the truth is the thing if your truth is that you actually grew up in a non-white neighborhood and you have a lot of the same like experiences and ideas and culture then that's your truth and we can tell yeah like one of my favorite rappers is a no she's not my okay let me hold I'm getting out of hand. A good rapper right now is this white girl from Indiana. Georgiana. Have you heard of his name? She's terrible at rapping. But she's doing it honestly. You can tell she just loves to rap as this little white lady. She's like, huh? Most of her aliens are just hot doing it. She's like, what? She's confused as hell. But she killing it. And it's like, do that, man. I'm okay with it. I don't want to mesh cultures, honestly. I'm cool. We can visitation. Yeah. Visitation. We can have racial visitation. Racial visitation needs to be the name of something immediately. A special, a nonprofit, a 501c3. Racial visitation needs to be something immediately. Let's get racial visitation fucking popping, bro. Racial visitation. Honestly, we're going to start racial visitation. It's a podcast. Yeah. Racial visitation is our podcast. It's going to have one episode every six months. Just to check in. Just to check in. How are things with you? Oh, it's great, man. What have you been watching and listening to? Let's share. Let's share. That is so funny. Yeah, man. So I feel like that's the, for the whites, I guess, y'all just keep doing y'all things. You know, white people, white people, if you need anything, reach out. Let me know how I can help. Let me know how I can get you to not be strolling. I don't, that is so humiliating. Oh, yes, that's what I was talking about. That is how we got here. That guy. Yeah. It's, um, because they see you just having a good time. Because we all having fun strolling. And we getting all the girls. And then they fucking try to clean. That's fucking. Try to clean. Please. And you can't really beat his ass. You just got to, like, mush him and pat him. Yeah. Get the fuck out of here. Not mush. Yeah, we was mush him. Hand on face mush. Yeah. That is so funny. Yeah, man. That's so funny. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all-in-one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or scaling your business, Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with a professional website, grow your brand, and get paid all in one place. 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Brendan had, he was a dirty blonde. Wow. Or what is it called? Strawberry blonde. Dirty blonde. It's crazy. Wow. I know Brendan. I've met him in many lifetimes. I meant Brendan was very much social justice. Yeah. Shout out to him, man. He was a good guy. The first time I met a white guy like that was he was a line cook at Applebee's. Oh, that's the line cook to a black fraternity. It's not a joke. It's not a joke. And I really liked him. I was a host there and he was like 10 years older than me. And he ran that kitchen like the goddamn Navy. And I was like, I like that guy. Wait, that was your first job? No, my first job was at a Golden Corral. I will say I got there I was supposed to be just working the cash register and then I showed up on day one and they were like you're also going to decorate the cakes and I was like you can't go cake I said oh that felt because I was not out of the closet but I was like that felt a little homophobic they saw something in me you'll do the cakes and I did I decorated the fuck out of those cakes putting the little carrots on the carrot cake they saw the talent in you Dude, I was, because I don't know if anyone's ever eaten a Golden Corral. Every slice of carrot cake in Golden Corral has a little tiny carrot design on it and frosting. That's beautiful. I was going crazy on those things. Also, Golden Corral, best cinnamon rolls on the planet. Thank you for saying that. Yes. Golden Corral, Bourbon Street Chicken is something so special and powerful to me to this day. I went to a Golden Corral in Springfield, Illinois, bro. Let's go. When they took us on the Lincoln exhibit, shout out eighth grade. Shout out Abe Lincoln. Nah, he... Whatever with him. This isn't about... This is about Golden Corral. Yeah. Bro, I've never had a cinnamon roll that fucking good in my fucking life. Special things are happening at Golden Corral. Are they still around? Oh, they're around. Oh, we should hit that up. Dude, I would love to go to Golden Corral. Last time we were on tour, I made everyone stop at a Golden Corral. We should get the squad together. Let's go to a... What is the nearest Golden Corral to New York City? Chance? I'm looking it up. Thank you. Oh, my God. I took the homies, all the New York people that lived here their whole life. They'd never been to Cracker Barrel. Okay. There's one in the Bronx. There's a Golden Corral in the Bronx? Yeah, Van Nest. Whoa. I don't know about that. I'm wondering how I would be received up there. If my fat ass walked into the Golden Corral in the Bronx, if they'd be like, hey, there's a limit. Don't come up here and be crazy. No offense to the Bronx. I don't think they got the spirit for a Golden Corral. I don't know if they have the space. A Golden Corral needs a certain level of space to radiate the energy that it needs to have. That is true. Every Golden Corral is like a palace. Yeah. You see it shining. It's like one thing. You need a 40 car parking lot. You need like a 400 car parking lot. And a moat in front. Yes. Legitimately. Legit. Wait, hold on. Nah, we got to. So I drove the homies that never, we drove out of the city to go to Cracker Barrel. Cracker Barrel. Cracker Barrel is Chance's favorite restaurant. he loves to stop at a Cracker Barrel and you know what Michelle who's not here right now Michelle I learned only after hiring her I might not have if I had known she also loves Cracker Barrel and her goal is to eat it like every one of them in the country and now I'm terrified for when we go on tour next because I'm going to be outnumbered yeah okay not every she trying to go to everyone does she mean it I don't know but she loves a Cracker Barrel I'm not going to lie Cracker Barrel I put up with whatever's going on in there I walk in, I'm like, yep, yep I don't like that I'm here, yep, yep, yep Serve me up, yo I need potato I'm doing the casserole They got this hash brown A hash brown casserole? I didn't even know about this, I don't think Oh my god, it's cheese in there, they seasoning it up Oh, we gotta go, bro We need a golden corral and a cracker barrel Hash brown casserole steak tips. Whoa. They soak them in garlic butter. Whoa. And then I'm snob for French toast. I genuinely am scouring the country for the best French toast. Let's go to Cracker Barrel. 100%. I wonder what the best French toast I've ever had is. I know I've had some good ones. I can't remember where the best one I've had is, but I'm going to think. Actually, have you ever had a French toast with a, I don't remember the place I had this most recently, but sometimes they'll serve French toast with like an orange cream, glaze kind of thing. Yes. That, to me, is very special. Little goat in Chicago. Yeah? Best French toast on the planet, yo. Wow. So they do the OG maple syrup. They chop up the strawberries, but then what they do, little crunches of chicken, fried chicken. Crunch, little popcorn chicken. On top? Sprinkled on it. Yeah, that's really special to me. Oh, I cried in that joint, bro. That's really special. I cried. I was dapping everybody up. They like, what the fuck is wrong with you? Yeah, all right, yeah. Okay, bro. That's so funny. Yeah, but that's my bag right there. Wait, I have a question for you. Okay, so we're done. Child therapy, forget the kids. We're not worrying about them anymore. Comedy full-time? Full-time, baby. How's it going? I'm really good. Yeah? Yeah. Are you good with the free? Okay, this is my question. Yeah, okay. Me neither. No. I thought my whole early 20s teens when I was working all the time, I thought, man, once I have free time, it's over for everybody. I'll write a movie a day. I'll write new jokes. I just was like, I'll do it. And I cannot get myself to use my free time. I'm not disciplined. I wake up at 3.30. P.M.? Some days. I wake up at 3.30 in a huff, in a daze, rush to the coffee shop, drop my coffee you need to go get dinner i'm still acclimating to because you know i've worked nine to five so i'm like the first few months i was just like i'm waking up when the fuck i want to wake up i don't give a fuck yeah now i'm i'm to 11 now yeah that's really good yeah 11 i mean that i still hit the gym i still do what i gotta do but it's late yo that makes sense to me i mean also if you're doing a lot of i i a lot of comics do i know that a lot of comics do this i had so many comics are sleeping as late as they possibly can in the day because they're going to do a 2 a.m. spot at wherever the fuck 100 but what you're saying is i always thought i'm sitting in my nine to five like doing a session with a kid they leave out i do my notes for the kid and i'm rushing to write jokes or thinking about i felt way more creative during the nine to five days honestly it's actually same and it's been really distressing to me yeah because i hated my i hated my days then. I liked my life, but I hated having to be somewhere. I have a real problem with authority. It's like the most identifying thing about me. 100%. I don't even like when I tell me what to do. I resent being told what to do. So we gotta go to the gym? I'm telling myself, fuck you, dude. You're gonna tell me to write jokes? Okay. Fuck me. We'll see. Fuck you to me. I hate being told what to do. I'm with you. When's your birthday? It's this week. Oh, shit. Happy birthday. You coming to my birthday party? Now. Are you all my close friends? No. Yes, you are. Am I? You gotta be. Antonio, you have to be all my close friends. Caleb, I better be on that close friends, man. If I check right now and you're not, how embarrassed will I be? Oh, my God. Yes, Saturday night. What are you doing Saturday night? I'm at your party. This won't be out by then, so I feel very comfortable. Wait, Antonio. Yeah, don't. Yeah, I'll be there. Well, a problem has been remedied. Okay, here we go. Don't worry, something just got fixed. Okay. it's a costume party okay i'm with that you got to get a costume what's the what's the thing there's it's like halloween no theme the only thing i will tell you is it's so funny because nori reed was in here you know nori yeah nori she was in here yesterday hanging out and she told me her costume idea and she was like she was like yeah i'm gonna i'm gonna wear just like a dress and i was like it's not gonna cut it like you can't you can't you can't phone it in on the birthday and then i posted a close friend story being like hey everybody nori just told me that she was planning I'm wearing a dress at the party. There's several days before the party. I just want to let anyone else planning on phoning it in to know, like, you have time to make a different choice. People start DMing me. I'm getting DMs. Someone messed me and said, two nights ago, I had a nightmare that my costume flopped. You run a tight ship then. I'm creating a culture of fear at the birthday party. Yeah, people come in shaking. People shit. Is my costume good enough? Oh, okay. So I got to lock in. Now I'm scared to be on the close friends. No, it's weird. When you get on close friends, you start out in trouble and work your way out. I gotta get my suit together No, the way I put it is like I'm so serious about the costume It's an open bar There's a great DJ It's gonna be a great night Vibes The way I put it is If you're planning on coming as like Jake from State Farm Oh, no That shit pisses me off If you could walk down the street And someone wouldn't know you're in costume Yeah You know as well as I do that you phoned it in Yeah, I wouldn't do that to you I know you wouldn't No That's not you No But you definitely need to come I will be there Come have fun It's gonna be and here's what I'm going to tell you. It's supposed to be seven degrees on Saturday. I am already anticipating the texts I'll get on Sunday. They're like, hey, so sorry. You know, a pipe burst. No, it didn't. Yeah. It was cold and you didn't want to do the Uber. And I'm already, I'm prepared. I'm preparing myself to be gracious. I'll tell you one thing, bro. I get creative with those excuses. Oh, yeah. To the homies? Yeah. Oh, man. You wouldn't believe the things I can come up with. Oh, yeah. We get in the mud, bro. I'm doing more creative writing there than I am on my set. My best writing is in them text messages. I'm going to town, man. I'm not going just grandma. No. It ain't grandma. No, grandma's healthy. I'm pulling a picture. I broke my finger. I broke my finger for real like five years ago. Yeah. I still got the picture. Please. You're going to be using that picture when your hands don't even look like that anymore. Exactly. Yeah. But I'm like, it's only dislocated, so we chilling. Yeah. But I'm sorry. Don't worry about me. Yeah, that's the thing is you have to come up with something severe enough that your absence is excused, but not so severe that they start sending flowers. But I am in that thesaurus, though. I'm using them words. I'm like, this bequeaths me. Indubitably, I have encountered. Oh, my goodness, man. Yeah. But I won't hit you with it. No, no, no. I feel that you'll come through. And it's going to be very fun. And you're single. Yeah. There's going to be, let me tell you something. Antonio, you can't think of a better room in the country to be in than a party that I'm throwing if you're a single straight man. Caleb, we run, somehow we run in the same circle a little bit. Yeah. We have adjacent circles. Yeah. I've been in those rooms with you and your people. I was not single the first time, but this time I'm going to have some fun. That's all. Oh, Caleb, I'm ready for this. You're going to have a very fun night. My friend, I guess I won't name him. Maybe it would embarrass him. I have a single straight guy friend who's a very talented musician. At the party last year, every once in a while, I would cock my head and find him, and he would be in a corner. These girls are, he's like, there's a member of the Blue Man group trying to get his number. You know what I mean? He is just like cornered. Crawling up the wall. Truly, these girls are feral. because straight women don't get, we don't talk enough about how these women are feral. Freaks. Freaks. So, the Fallon shit, man. Yeah. My DMs look like Mardi Gras right now. Yeah. Yeah. People don't talk about it and I think I'm the only man that can talk about it a little bit and I'm like, y'all, these girls, man, they wild and it's bad. When was your last relationship? because now I'm trying to get to the bottom of what's going on with you. We can get to the bottom. You're a conventionally attractive, very funny child therapist who's a comedian that also dresses well. You have good style. Thank you. And you're a nice guy. So I'm like, either you're a serial killer or every woman in the world is really bad at dating, but something is going on. I'm not a serial. That is a pipeline, though. Yeah. All the attributes. Yeah. He's murdering people. Are there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got empathy, so I'm not murdering people. Yeah. I'm a hoe, Caleb. That's a problem. See, that's what it is. That's what it is. When are you going to settle down? I don't know. Oh, Caleb. How long are you going to do this? I don't know. It's about three more years. You think so? No, no, no. No. That was a joke. It felt sincere. Immediately, immediately backing off of that. About three more years? You think so? No, no, no, no. The thing is, because I truthfully, I am that. I want to have a family and all that shit, but I got that thing in me, man. I got that hunger. I have that darkness. I got that darkness. That darkness that says keep looking. Yeah. I don't know when I'm going to settle down. I think I have this ideal woman in mind, and that's the problem. You shouldn't be walking around with too much of an ideal of something. You should let that whatever is for you come to you naturally. instead of projecting out. You should let the thing come to you. So I'm trying to work on that. And I got shit I need to work on before I can really be with a girl. That was the problem with the last relationship. I couldn't. I couldn't. Yeah, too much. Damn, that is some male hoe. That sentence was so convincing and rehearsed. You are a male hoe. That like, no, I've got my own stuff that I need to work on before I can. It's not you, yo. Hey, no, stop, stop, stop, stop. It's not you. It's not you. I'll fuck with you. Yeah, yeah. When I figure my stuff out, like, who knows what we could be? That's the problem. And that's the thing. That was my little topic I was going to tell you. You can't be authentic and attractive. This is what's so true to you? Yeah. You can't be authentic and attractive. You can't be, like, authentic. It's annoying. Yeah, what do you mean by that? Like, I am myself. Yeah. But people always think I'm faking. Yeah. People think I'm like, this is a character. You being like a nice guy. Me being a good person. They hate that shit. You don't hate it and the homies don't hate it. No, yeah, we're buddies. But most people are like, you fucking shut the fuck up. Oh, you work with kids? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, you got things you got to work on? Shut my dick. If I was a straight guy and I was out in the market competing with you, I would kill you. Oh, yeah, I'm sorry. I would be in the comments of every video you posted being like, didn't laugh once. Yes, bro. Fuck this guy. Dude, I'm in war, bro. I'm at war. It's bad out here. That must be really hard. No, it's not. No, come on. It's hard. Caleb, stop. It's not hard at all. It's just, it is the truth, though. Like, people don't like that shit. And it's fine. Like, I'm going to continue to, I kind of like. You like being the villain. I think I'm learning, too. It was hard at first. because I am a nice guy. I only ever heard people talk positively about you though You don think there a genuine I understand what you saying We halfway being silly but also it kind of true Yeah yeah yeah But you don think there like a genuine opposition to you do you Like, you don't think people are actually annoyed with you? No, no, no. I think it's more so like a tongue-in-cheek type thing. Yeah. Yeah, people are like, hmm. Right. Yeah, but it's not. There's a little bit, though. Yeah. There's a little bit, but they're like, God, that's annoying. Shut the fuck up. But it's like, we can go to the costume party together. Yeah. Yeah, like, it's fine. I think a problem with dating right now for everybody, too, is like, or a problem that I feel anyway, I guess I shouldn't make it everyone's problem, is like the problem of choice. Like when you're with somebody and things are a little difficult that you go like, oh, they're getting on my nerves or this thing of theirs is brushing up against mine, which is going to happen. Have you ever heard of porcupine theory? No. I don't know if this is the official name of it, but like the idea is, and I'll butcher this, there's some, whoever came up with this made it much smarter. someone just google it and you can hear the actual one but the gist of it is uh it's a theory about human intimacy and the idea is that like porcupines when it's cold out they need to get close to share warmth but because they have spines inherently they're going to hurt each other a little bit the closer they get because they're going to prick each other yeah and that's what it's like to be a human being in like romantic dealings is like we want we we actually need to be close we need to let people in uh but inherently when we do our stuff is going to poke their stuff and there's ours etc yeah the problem i think in dating right now is like every time you're with somebody you again i'm making this a universal problem about dating something i have experienced is that when i'm dating somebody and things aren't ideal in the back of my head i'm like there's 300 other guys that would love to be doing this with me that would be easier going about that dinner plan or that would be you know i'm saying you but i think i agree with you i think but going for the easy is the problem like 100% yeah that's the problem though like I had that a lot with my we the same I had that like I'm like and especially when they come into you yeah I ain't gotta hear about I don't wanna hear about you no it's it's legitimately difficult it's narcissistic really 100% we all are being manufactured narcissists now it's becoming more and more that because I swear to God bro like the first few years of my relationship, my longest one, I can get out here if I want. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? It's just like, but I think, I don't know. I also think people are built different to a little bit, but I've been with so many. I think the more people you be with too, sexually, it's harder for you to connect to somebody. 100%. Like I can't, now I'm like, when a girl says they like me, I'm like, hmm. Yeah. Which is bad. I got to go to, I'm in therapy for it. What do you mean by that? Like you're annoyed by it or you're like. No, no, no. I want it. But I'm just like, I've heard it a lot. It's a foregone conclusion almost. Yeah. You're like, yeah, I have experienced that a lot of people are into me. Yeah. And that sucks. That sounds bad to say out loud. No, but it's reality. Yeah. It's true. It's just like, there's a script almost now. Yeah. And I'm waiting for somebody that doesn't have that script. Yeah. Once I find somebody that's like. Damn, this sounds like. No, it doesn't. It's very, very honest, and I'm actually very appreciative of it. But I guess I'm wondering for you as your friend, the only way to break the script of I am into you and would like to be with you is for someone to not feel that way. Now you getting to it, Kayla? What are we going to do with that? Woo, Kayla, now you talking. I need a girl that hates me, dog. If we keeping it a buck, if you don't like me, I'm for that. That is so annoying. Annoying I don't want that for you I don't want that either But god damn it Like when a girl is like Put it like this Ah No come on Okay I won't say no names But I was dealing with a girl That was like She was bisexual And she was in them She Couldn't give a fuck less about me Yeah I feel like She couldn't care And Nat was like I love you Yeah Like you can go You really like women Yeah I'm just here for a little bit I'm like mail order dick Yeah And I was like You were into that We had a good chemistry Like she We liked each other a lot But there was this distance Yeah Where she kind of was just like I can do without you Like there's girls making me come And that's We having a good time over here Sisterhood And I was just like Not sisterhood I wanna It was sisterhood There was a lot of sisterhood Not sisterhood Dang you know they be throwing that around Not sisterhood. Womanhood. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was just like, it just didn't work out in that way. But that was recently the most close. The time we shared, I was like, wow, I could have locked in with that girl. Yeah. And that's dumb. Well, also, by the way, what you're explaining, I don't think is a super unique. Yeah, it's not. Which is to say, I don't think you should feel bad about, like, we all want what we can't have. and not everybody, many, many people are like, I think a very common problem in dating is that a lot of us are attracted to things we shouldn't be. Like, you know, being attracted to someone who doesn't like you. That's obviously like clinical and bad and same. I love, there's something, I love the chase. I love a pursuit. Are you chasing these guys now? You too, I feel like now. What are you talking, you were going to say classy? No, no, no, no, no. I said, you clouded up right now. You ain't chasing nobody. Not clouded up. Well, that's the thing is I'm – a lot of the guys who come to me, the guys who want me like that that are like in the DMs, and a lot of times it's the same thing where I'm like, okay. Yeah. Even if they're hot, I'm like, whatever. But, yeah, a guy who I feel like I'm like working for it and I'm like really putting in the effort, that, yeah. What's your game, Caleb? Stop. Can you – I'll tell you my game I make shit happen that is I send plans clip it clip it Virginia clip it Mr. Caleb makes it happen please but I mean like I think so many I think so many people are I asked someone out yesterday and he was like, oh, I never get asked out. And he's gorgeous. And I'm like, yeah, because people are intimidated by how gorgeous, and he's very successful at what he does. And yeah, I'm like, I just was like, hey, I want to take you to dinner next Thursday. This is the time and the place. Let me know if you're interested. Let's go. That's like, but that's how I have to be. You know what I mean? I don't get the luxury of being one of these like Brooklyn twinks that just gets to coast by on a jawline. I have to be, I have to have plans. Shit has to be set in stone. there needs to be plans you can't just come up and raise the shirt up pull it up the shirt it's going to do it for some people but it's going to need to also have a reservation on the other end I can't wait to be Mr. Make It Happen Mr. Make It Happen is crazy Mr. Make It Happen is so funny that's so fire you know what clip it racial visitation we got to get these clip it Antonio I have a segment for you Oh, let's get it. A game. Did you know we play a game? I did not know we play a game. We play a game on this show. Let's play a game. True, false segment. I'm going to read you 15 statements. Okay. You're going to tell me as quickly as you can after each one if what I just said is true or false. Mm-hmm. You get 10 or more correct, we're going to give you 50 US dollars. Oh, my goodness. Come on. Okay. You ready? Yeah. A is the most commonly used letter in the English language. True. False. E. Fuck. Fish can't blink. False. True. Titanic was released in 1999. False. False. It was 1997. 50 Cent and Charlie Chaplin were alive at the same time. True. True. The Chicago Stags were the original NBA team in Chicago. True. It's true. Venus is the hottest planet in our solar system. True. That is true. Whoa. Monaco is the smallest country on Earth. True. False. It's the Vatican City. Red Belt is the highest rank in Brazilian jiu-jitsu. False. True. Training day was nominated. What? I got the jiu-jitsu for four years. I don't know if it's the Brazilian training day was nominated for best picture at the Oscars. True. False. Should have been. Madonna's real first name is Caroline. I feel like it's true. False. It's Madonna. University of Chicago's mascot is Phil the Phoenix. False. True. Your radius bone is in your leg. False. It's true. False. it's in your forearm uh canada has the longest coastline in the world uh false true fuck i'm about to kill myself i know exactly what has happened to you okay i'll tell you later the cta stands for chicago transport authority no false chicago transit authority mr mr satan has never been killed in the entire dragon ball series uh true that is true yeah how do you do chance six six six is a six is kind of a recurring number i know what happened to you i've played this game what over a hundred something times now oh if you count two or like 150 i what happens is with a true false thing people will get in a rhythm yes of thinking like oh the last one was such and such so the next one must be such and the rhythm is just off yes and i saw it happening for you and i wanted to help you so bad. I stopped actually considering the question. I'm just saying. You got in your head. Dragon Ball question was good. Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, I'm ashamed. Don't be ashamed. Don't be ashamed. Chance does this to hurt people. He writes these questions. Oh, yeah. He's a total masochist. He's a hurtful guy. Okay. Yeah, I'm fucked. You got six. Damn. You got six, which is beautiful. But, yeah, you're not getting that money. My Madonna should. I did not know that was her fucking first. That's fun. That was fun, though. We talked about, okay, we talked about mom and dad. We talked about, by the way, you need to tell your mom. I saw the photo of you and your parents at Fallon. She looked good. Yes. She looked so good. I've been in many a fight. She had that dress on. She had that dress on. She had that dress on in a crazy way. Please tell her I said that. I will. I almost commented, and then I was like, hey, that's not. You're going to see Antonio soon, first of all. we talked about your parents, we talked about jujitsu we talked about your show, we did true-false Chance, how long have we been going? We are at 58 minutes Oh great, what else is going on with you? What do you think about 2026? What's it all about? 2026 is going to be a good year Yeah, I think it's we kind of spoke about it a little bit but I want to make stuff this year I think I want to get artsy-farty with it, man We'll take little acting roles here and there and do stand-up all the time but I really want to make things and make people feel some shit this year, man. Get back to feeling some shit this year, dog. Yeah? Yeah, Mr. Make It Happen. Mr. Make It Happen is crazy. Do you think you were feeling things last year? Last year I was very much on autopilot. Why? I will say. I just, it was my second year in New York, and I think I was like, okay, we got to get out of survival mode. Yeah. So I turned the brain off, and I went, and I just worked, worked, worked, worked. Yeah. Now I'm back. And I'm like, we can be creative again. That makes sense. I feel like it's a lot of times when people move cities, like when people move from New York to LA or vice versa, that first year and change is like, I'm just like, I am setting up my life. Yes. I'm trying to figure out where I get coffee. I'm trying to figure out what train I take to what. Like you're just trying to figure out like how I live in a place. And then you feel like you're kind of let out of the chutes. You're like, I'm off to the races. Now I know my basics are handled. And now I can actually be creative or date or whatever the fuck. Yeah, people don't talk about that a little bit. It's like, that's what it is. I think I came out of that fog. And I'm like, okay, now we have friends. Yeah. All my homies here. We got community again. Now it's time to make that happen. You said you wanted to act more. What is your dream role? What is the thing that you're like, man, if I could. And I don't even necessarily mean like working with a certain director or anything. I mean, like, if there's a thing you could portray on screen, what would it be? I really want to get into my brooding bag, man. Yeah? I want to be a brooding guy in a movie at some point. Yeah? Yeah, I had that in my bag, man. I can do that. I feel that. I'm a sneaky lesbian, bro. No, I can see it. Yeah. I can see it for you. Thank you, man. I can see it for you. What kind of brooding guy do you want to do, like, is there a role that, this is a good way to put it, is there a role that someone else has already played that you're like, that would have been? I'm not going to lie, man. I really look at Lakeith a lot. Yeah, of course. Yeah, I think he embodies a kind of a style of acting that I really like. Just absurd, but still, like, he can pull you in emotionally still. But he's not doing too much. He's very much bringing you into his world. I like him a lot. And I like Nigga in Trouble, but Jonathan Majors was pretty good in his heyday. Oh, he was in trouble. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I briefly was like, is he in trouble? And then I was like, oh, in a big way. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He got in a lot of trouble, actually. But, you know, before he got with the white women, he was good, man. Cautionary tale. Cautionary tale. And time memorial, as old as time memoriam. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I know you're an actor, too. I'm acting. You get down. I would like more. Yeah, I mean, I'm in the same position as you, kind of. I'm definitely focused right now on, like, artistic pursuit. I actually was, like, reflecting the other day and was like, I don't really want to be, I find myself frustrated anytime I'm in conversations about building my career. I'm over there. I don't want to build my career. I'm a creative person living a creative lifestyle and that will let in all kinds of different things. But when you start talking about a career, there's these like tracks and things you're supposed to do where I'm like, okay, if I talk about my career as a standup, then inherently as soon as I finished the, I put out a special last year, the second that's over, people start asking, where's the next one? And there might not be a next one. Oh God. I don't care. And your shit was amazing, bro. And that should be enough for a while. Yeah. Eat this, digest this, bro. Like you put in some real pain to make that. And let me live. Let you go. Fuck, I seen you was in Europe. Like do your thing, bro. Like I don't understand why. Like we dropping albums like we AI, bro. You put some pain in. Let you ride that out, I feel like. Yeah. Well, I also just want to leave room for other things to come in and out. Like I want to do other creative things. I don't cease to be a stand-up just because if I want to spend a year or two years or three years writing a fucking book and not doing any stand-up, when you talk about a career path, then those things become like, oh, you wasted three years because you're not on the career path. But when you talk about living a creative life as a creative person, everything has value. And I think if you don't show this industry who you are and your own creative pursuits, they'll make a character for you. I don't want that to happen because I have a blank face that they would try to slap a style of being on and I'm not trying to do that. So this year I'm going to show people who I really am in the creative space and then hopefully I can just give me money to do that. That's what I want. I see it. It's on the horizon. I see it. It's on the horizon. I appreciate you, gang. A high five. Why not? A high five. You ain't did that in a while. I haven't done a high five in a minute. When's the last time I did a high five? years probably Chance you keep track of my high fives where was the last one get the chart out Antonio please tell people where they can find you how they can support you oh man Instagram Antonio Kareem YouTube Antonio Kareem and I'm in these streets doing stand up oh comedy store January 31st if this comes out okay if it's out before then cool and otherwise they'll see you go follow Antonio check out his shows see him wherever thanks for doing it dude this was great no doubt bro appreciate you appreciate it