This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human. Why do I need an app to heat up my coffee? It's one more thing. Armstrong and Getty. One more thing. There's an app for that. Of course there is. I was getting so angry at my new microwave last night, but before that, this. Oh, just a little fun nugget. I go to the gym. You're a little fun nugget, aren't you? Hey, thank you so much. I'm trying to go to the gym as much as possible. Okay. And the people that I work out with, I wouldn't consider them friends. They're, I see them daily, but their acquaintances, you know, we wouldn't make kind of like insulting jokes to each other. This chick the other day comes up to me and in front of the entire class goes, damn, Katie, your boobs look like they're about to explode. Wow. And I went, yeah, I'm aware. And then she doubled down and said, no, like, I'm having trouble making eye contact with you. They're just, they're out of control. What the hell? I swear to all that is holy. As a guy, I don't know, is this the sort of thing that women ever say to each other? I don't know this. I mean, if you're good friends, probably. I mean, I could see myself joking around if one of my friends was pregnant and say, well, I can see the boobs are about to explode. One, because I've been there. Two, I'm close to you. But, I mean, for starters, my coach's jaw almost fell off of her face because it was loud enough for her to hear it. And my dad was standing like three feet to my left. That's not cool. I'm like, what? That's a jackass right there. I'm ready to diagnose a clear case of jackassity. Was she angry? Did she want you to do something about it? No. It sounds like she felt threatened. I don't know. I'm trying to figure out what it is about being pregnant that makes people think like oh I'm just going to say the dumbest thing that I can I've been told that my beer belly is coming in nicely so I don't funny I get it hilarious so anyway just a PSA that if you know somebody pregnant and you don't know them that well just shut up let them bring it up perfect yeah boy I hate the idea of crossing boundaries like that. I'm just mortified by the very idea of it. Yeah, and I reacted playfully because I don't have the energy for that kind of drama. But the back of my mind was going, what the fuck was that? The dad being so close by is definitely an added level of uncomfortable because nobody wants that. No. See, I'm just the opposite. I'm extra sensitive and make sure that I don't say anything bad. you know i do too but for some reason man you you get pregnant and everybody's like here i come with the comments yeah it's funny i wouldn't worry about the dad thing so much i mean he's he had the same look pregnant wife and raised a child and the rest of it i'm not talking about some dad daughter pregnant boo somebody boobs in front of their dad well i not gonna talk about them period Right Unless they address you first what do you think of my boobs for instance hey do these things seem very nice they about to explode huh you know look how big they are okay all right if i've got a uh yeah yeah craziness so let's take away we don't make any comments on to pregnant people about their pregnancies i mean you can ask how they're doing and all that but like how you do body comments yeah i know everything's changing and it's crazy thank you yeah yeah um so my microwave quit on me a week ago and then i went through a whole weekend without a microwave and i didn't realize how much i used the microwave until i didn't have it just like reheat heating up a cup of coffee that's gone a little cold or whatever the heck it is and uh it's annoying not having a microwave so i got a new one did a little research on chat gpt and whatever like that fancy microwave that panasonic makes it's a combo air fryer microwave thingy it's supposed to be really great but it did mention in all the reviews that while it is fantastic it's got a bit of a learning curve on the uh the user interface i am a big ui guy i think that's one of the biggest deficits we've got in america right now man if you're good at ui urinary infection uh user interface oh um people who are in UI, I mean, you can make a ton of money if you're good at it, getting hired by Tesla or Apple or whoever. It's this we've we've talked about this in the past with engineers. Joe and I have in the radio business. They talk in engineer speak and like computer experts. They talk in computer. They don't talk away about like they can't look at things the way somebody who just sat down at this for the first time and has never looked at it. They don't have the ability to see it through that lens. People that are really good at UI can. That's one of the reasons Apple's so good. They must have really great. Maybe Steve Jobs was just a natural UI genius to understand how like a person who's never touched this before would think about it as opposed to having to go through. Anyway, so Panasonic did a horrible job on this microwave, and I'm not good at this sort of thing to start with, but just this it's just the menu on this thing to try to figure out just to like I just want to heat up this coffee for 30 seconds. That should that should to me. That should be intuitively. intuitively you could walk up to it, have never seen it before in your life, and figure it out. It should be designed that way. You shouldn't need to read any instructions to heat something up for 30 seconds, in my opinion. Yeah, clearly, because I've got similar devices, and they don't have that problem. You've got a little tab that says microwave, or you can just hit plus 30 and it starts. This one has so many different screens and knobs and things that you've got to do to do everything, and it's really annoying. But what it suggests is the app. You download the app and you do everything from your phone. And isn't that obviously a data grab? Isn't that the whole reason they want you to do it? Is that I'm sure the agreement when I click on I agree is, and we get to look at every keystroke on everything you ever do for the rest of your life so that you can heat up your coffee from your phone. That's why Nest exists and Ring exists. All of that stuff is a data grab. So does this thing not have like a 30 second button? No, no, it doesn't have any easy thing like that. But the main thing was that I kept running into it. I had my son come down because he better at this sort of stuff It like can you figure out how to turn this thing off and open the door It wouldn let you Well originally it wouldn let you open the door like a lot of microwaves until it off because you don want it open with microwaving your body or and I would get it started and I couldn't figure out. It'll cook your nipples. Everybody knows that. I would get it started and I couldn't figure out how to turn the damn thing off. Most microwaves, if you open the door, it turns it off. Yeah. So, that's why I turn off lots of microwaves. I just set it to whatever. five minutes when I think it's been long enough, I open the door and I take out my coffee and drink it. I like to try to open it right before the buzzer goes off. Because I hate the dings. That's one of the reasons that I do it that way. I don't like hearing all the dings. But this thing, I couldn't, you couldn't open the door until it's timed out its entire thing. And I had to keep unplugging it to be able to get the door open. So I'd pull it out from the wall and unplug it so it'd be off so I could open the door. This is not working. What's the return policy on this thing? and you had to call your offspring down how do i turn this off so he figured out some way and i don't know how he did this we're microwaving something to heat it up and i was saying i'm gonna unplug it to try it because it's been heat running for a long time i'm gonna plug he said no i think if you do this and he opened the door and it's still running the microwave is still microwaving with the door open i unplugged it that i probably have brain cancer now is there There's got to be something wrong with it. Something wrong with me. I'm sure it's operator error. Wow. I've never heard of a microwave that continues to run with the door open. I felt a tumor growing on my brain. Or was it doing another one of its functions? That'd be a tumor, not a tuber. Huh? Like it was doing air fry or something with the door open. It almost had to be set on convention or air fry, and I had it completely wrong. Or convection. Is that what it is? Convection? Or a convention. In case you want to meet your colleagues in the oven, yes. The reason I like Tesla and Apple, I think everything should be intuitive. It's obvious the way you do this. You just walk up to it. I've never looked at any instructions on Apple. I can open the computer. I can do whatever I want, all that sort of stuff. But other products, man, they want you to read a book and go on YouTube and all kinds of things just to do the simplest tasks. Yeah. Yeah. Well, and lately I had high, high hopes that AI would take care of this. Maybe it will soon, but asking, hey, I can't do this on my computer. How should I do it? And it'll say, oh, that's easy. Just go to file, click on that, then open function and you click on file. There's no effing function anywhere. Right. That was updated six years ago or six months ago or six minutes ago. So, but yeah, that it's impossible to get accurate up to date based on your operating system instructions. Well, I broke out the manual, which I almost never do. I'm just a big, I'm a big, if I can't figure it out, I'm taking it back. I want it to be stupid, simple. Everything I use. And most of that's why I buy Apple stuff. But I actually broke out the manual. And this has happened in recent times, I think. I don't know exactly if it's to save money. it's almost entirely pictures with no words I guess that way they can send it to every country with one manual without having to have English German French Spanish whatever I guess it cheaper but you can figure out what going on from the pictures or they trying to drive me to the app. They're hoping it's frustrating enough that I download the app and then bingo. Then they've really made their money. They've made more money than I spent on the than the microwave probably immediately when I download the app. Oh, certainly the most frustrating things for me is when I go to a manual to try to figure out something and there's an effing qr code yeah oh yeah yeah they want you to go to the website because they don't want to print and distribute manuals which i get it i mean economically speaking it's a no-brainer but i like the paper and i don't think it's just age because you can you can see it and open it and hold it right there yeah yeah yeah it's much better and then sometimes the qr code takes you to a you got a login thing because again they want you dialed into their system i'm not gonna have a freaking app to heat something up for a minute to eat up a pop tart i'm just not oh you know what i was a similar topic this could cause me to go on like if i ever get diagnosed god forbid with a dread disease and i've only got a few weeks left i'm going to go on a tour of vengeance taking out my enemies that's my plan anyway it's good to have a plan and and one of the one of the groups of people i will take out this is a new thing you go on i what was i looking at the other day i can't remember is i'm i do photography for fun i'm getting pictures like blown up and put on the wall um and uh it's super common now give us your uh give us your email address and we'll give you 20 off your first order and i think oh great okay cool yeah i'll do that i'll i'll give them my usual email address and and that i use for this sort of thing and no problem i'll go and hunt down the coupon code and you fill it out and they say yep we're almost there just give us your text number and right you can have 20 off you motherfuckers this is fraud it's deception you lied to me our relationship is over says me and i'm gone yeah i had a similar thing a couple of different times with online tests for things health things free online and it looks like a legit site you do the whole thing takes like 15 minutes and then uh if you want your results all you got to do is fill in you know give us your email and we'll send you the results screw you and your free online diagnostic whatever i hate you yeah i can understand i'm gonna come to their house i'm gonna fight you i'm gonna have you in a headlock just pounding in the nose joe the amount the amount of things i have not purchased because of that happening oh yeah screw you oh you got my email that's enough yeah need an enemy for life how do they not realize that i think they probably will are there enough soft heads that go ahead and think oh for 20 off a first order y'all have them text me for the rest of my natural life here's my social security number my blood type and my address my bank account mom's maiden name my first pet what else do you need man 20% off this is great well I guess that's it this is an iHeart podcast guaranteed human
